#i still wish we got more breakup aftermath stories lol like i wish we got more with ramuda

[akkivee]

something i like about stage canon is that with the sasasama duet from track 5, it lends itself to the assumption that after their break up the next time samatoki saw sasara was thru radio as he climbed up to stardom and it validates my hc that media was how samatoki found out sasara was just fine without him lol

[bokutosworld]

for the love that i’ve lost | miya atsumu

pairing: miya atsumu x f!reader  wc: 1633 words, angst with happy ending (maybe? lol) summary: when the past finally catches up to him, atsumu decides to make long overdue amends.

Atsumu lives life with no regrets. In all his years, he’s been careful with his choices and decisions; no hint of hesitation in his actions as he’s never too fond of the idea of looking back and beating himself up over the chances that he didn’t take. 

But with this invitation in one hand and his brother on the phone in the other, he gets an unsettling feeling. The one mistake that he has been running away from all these years has caught on to him. In his palm, his greatest fear has materialized. 

“‘Tsumu, are you still there?” 

For a minute, the setter was frozen in place, the hand holding the piece of paper was shaking and his eyes frantically reading and reading the contents of the letter. His strong resolve crumbles, the feelings he has locked away in his heart comes crashing in waves and he’s overwhelmed with the bitterness of longing and regrets – the very emotions that he has been concealing for the past years. 

Osamu is still talking in the other line, filling the silence that his twin brother left. When he came home from work, the other half of the Miya brothers saw a suspiciously decorated envelope on the mailbox. Ripping it open, he carefully reads the words written in cursive letters and when he processes it, his mind instantly flies to Atsumu.  

And with Atsumu's prolonged silence on the phone, he figures that he's looking at the invitation right now. 

"—don't have to go, you know that, Atsumu. I can attend in your stead. You're probably busy with training anyway, especially with the exhibition match against Schweiden Adlers happening soon." 

"’Samu," Atsumu's voice wavers as he contemplates what he's about to say next. "Did you know? About her engagement?" 

He sinks down on the sofa, closing his eyes and remembers the day she texted about the news. "Yeah, she informed me. I'm sorry I didn't relay the news to you." 

Atsumu chuckles bitterly, the tight grip he has on the letter slowly crumpling the paper. "You're mean, you know that?" 

"Oi, shut up," Osamu raises his voice in his defense. "You're the one who asked me not to tell you any updates about her. I wouldn't have known that she'd send you a letter directly."

A beat passes before he continues his statement. He knows his brother best, and if his intuitions were correct, Atsumu’s currently sulking and wishing for a way to undo his past. 

"She still cares for you, ‘Tsumu. She misses her friend.”

--- 

The setter retires to the comforts of his soft bed, laying on his stomach and groaning loudly on a pillow. He’s still reeling from the aftershock of receiving the news that his ex – the one and only love of his life, his sunshine, his high school sweetheart – is getting married. 

Not to mention the cold hard truth that Osamu dropped on him. 

“You’re my brother, but I can’t keep taking your side. Atsumu, she was your, our childhood friend first before being your lover. She’s been in our lives for so long, you can’t just cut her off as if you were ripping a band-aid. You immediately left town when the two of you broke up so you can pursue volleyball and you didn’t see how heartbroken she was,” Osamu spat, the words stinging his twin’s feelings more than he intended. 

“’Tsumu, you left her to grieve on her own. She made me swear not to tell you but every day, she kept asking me about you and how you were doing in Tokyo. It was like that for years until she met him.” There’s a brief pause before Osamu proceeds to dump the truth on Atsumu. “He healed her and showed her what it’s like to love again. Now, she’s happy. That is what you want, right? For her to be genuinely happy? 

Atsumu’s lost count of how many times he’d wished he had never let you go. It’s the only choice that he regrets – one that always keeps him up at night when he’s lying in bed and staring at nothing but the darkness. It’s during those wee hours when a familiar pain creeps in; it’s a pain that brings him back to the moment that he released your hand and walked out of your life. The words this is what’s best for us ringing constantly like a desperate chant, a vain effort to convince himself that he made the right choice. He’d hoped those words would bring some sort of ease in the aftermath of the breakup, but he was royally wrong. 

He reaches for his phone on the bedside table, opening his social media and searches for your profile. It’s been a while since he visited your page and when he does, he is greeted by a picture of you and your fiancé, happily smiling in each other’s arms and looking oh so painfully in love. As he continues to explore your page, he has half a mind to press on your contact that he’s saved. He wonders if you’ve changed your number, but it doesn’t take him long to decide as his thumb that was hovering over your name has now pressed the call button. 

Closing his eyes in anticipation, he can feel his own heartbeat in drumming in his ears and he almost ends the call but your voice brings him back. “Hello?” 

As soon as he hears you on the other line, Atsumu jumps up in surprise and he has to look at his phone to make sure that the call actually went through. 

“—mu, is this you? Hello?” 

He quickly puts his phone to his ear and clears his throat before saying his greeting. “Hey,” he laughs nervously, fiddling with the loose thread of his blanket. “How are you? I’m sorry, oh my god, did I wake you?” 

You chuckle, “No, I haven’t slept yet. I was arranging things for the wedding.” 

Silence overtakes the conversation for a moment, and Atsumu is thankful that you can’t see the way his face has fallen, sadness ghosting over his features. “Congratulations, I got the invitation.” He wants to ask why you even bothered to send him one, call you out on how insensitive you were because it felt unfair. Unfair at how it took him years to forget you; but it only took you mere seconds, just one letter and one hello, and you were back to his life again.   

“Do you remember that time we sneaked out and spent the evening looking at the stars? The skies were clear and we watched the most beautiful meteor shower,” Atsumu asks, suddenly feeling nostalgic. You reminisce the old times and think how could you forget that memory when it was that special moment that made you realize of your strong affection for the boy?

“Of course, I do,” you confess and Atsumu could hear the faintest of a smile in your words.  

“That night, when we saw the shooting stars, do you want to know what I wished for?” 

“What?” 

“For you to be the one that I’ll spend the rest of my life with.” His sudden confession takes you aback, and you can’t help but feel pained. You feel like crying, your voice is strained when you quietly mutter his name but he continues. “I know it’s too late for regrets, but I really shouldn’t have given up on us like that. Up to this day, I think about what could have happened if I fought for us the way you did. I keep looking back and I miss you.” 

“Every day, I wake up and wish that you were in my arms. I get off from practice and hope that you’re waiting for me at home. I’d love to experience all that with you, but here I am,” you hear his voice break. “I realize I never really said sorry for how I left you so suddenly, I hope you can still forgive me.” 

“Atsumu, I’ve forgiven you way back.” That’s all the affirmation he needs so he can put to rest his regrets and break free from his haunting past. The two of you settle in a comfortable silence as you wait for him to collect himself, the sounds of his sobs undoubtedly breaking your heart. When he does, he surprises you with his question, 

“So this fiancé of yours, does he treat you well?” 

You let out a hearty laugh and it elicits a smile from him. “He does, Atsumu. He’s a real gentleman and I know you’d get along.” From there, the phone call proceeds with lighthearted chat, catching up with each other’s lives, telling him the story of how you met your soon-to-be husband and the mood has shifted and it feels like two best friends reconnecting.  

There’s a question you were afraid to ask since the start of your conversation, “Will you be able to come to the wedding?” 

“What if I don’t want to?”

“It’s your choice. But it’s a special day and I’d want all the special people in my life to be there.” You admit. “You’re still that person to me, Atsumu.” He hates it when his brother was right, but he can’t deny it. He wants to be back in your life, even if it means just staying as a friend. 

“Isn’t that too cruel? Inviting your ex to your wedding? Are you sure your fiancé is okay with that,” he teases but he’s already decided that he’d be flying home and staying over at Osamu’s for the weekend of your wedding. 

If he can’t be the one waiting for you at the altar, then he thinks he owes it to you and to himself to see you off with a big smile. 

[jetaime-jespere]

hey, me again👀😳 i do not really have a proper tumblr account but i might make one just so i can badger you with my thoughts on your fics and you’d know i was once again here to annoy🤪 anywhooo teehee;

i am currently writing an essay (ew, ik, tell me about it), and my wsne playlist (that i will make public if you’d like a link? lol) came on and since yesterday i shared some songs with you i thought,,, why not do it again? hahaha. so.

People You Know- Selena Gomez. This one really do be hurting, it’s a new one i’ve added after the last few uploads and i feel it really fits with where they’re at with each other at the moment, thinking about how they used to be so close and now they act like they don’t know each other.. big time ouch.

Bad Kind Of Butterflies- Camilla Cabello. This one to me SCREAMS aaron hotchner trying to make it work with haley when all he can think about is Emily. A line from the song that resenates the Aaron/Haley/Emily situation from his pov for me is “what do i do when i love you and want somebody else?” thats..that’s just fact period the end, really.

Explain You- JP Saxe?? i think that’s his name? the one who sang if the world was ending with julia micheals idk what his name is my bad🤭anyway, yes, this song is just the two of them trying to understand their relationship once it was done, the both of them confused and hurt and not understanding why it fell apart so quickly.

All These Years- camila cabello, another recent add after the last two chapters, the song just to me really describes how even after all these years they’re still noicting little things about each other and they still hold that same effect.

What We Had- Sody. this to me is how i think emily would be. selfishing wishing that he never has what the two of them did becasue it was so special to her, but knows that’s it’s selfish and that he deserves to be happy.

Your Name Hurts- Hailee Steinfield (i think that’s how you spell it.. uh oh) but yes. this song to me i’m just gives me aftermath of the breakup vibes. the two of them struggling to even here the others name because it’s too painful.

Oh My God- Alec Benjamin. This is an Emily song from when she was Lauren. unable to really recognise herself and struggling to understand how she got here. how she let this happen.

Oooffff that’s a big list....how embarrazzzzinnggg. i swear i’m not obsessed..well.. i am, but you know, in a good way,,, uh oh very much mental illness👁👄👁 butttt yes. like i said i do have a playlist if you’d like a link, it started out as just a hotch/emily one but it’s more developed now into wsne and i have no complaints hehe.

like i said last time do let me know what you think and if you agree. if u don’t tell me why. this is ur story and if you have a different opinion on a song i’d absolutely love to hear it:)

hope you like this list haha, have a great weekend.. friday counts as the weekend, right?😜

Hi! Okay so, I haven’t had my coffee yet, so I hope I this makes sense BUT - I am not familiar with all of these, so I’ll have to give them a listen at some point. Friday definitely counts as the weekend, too. Your name hurts & Oh my god are veryyy accurate - Emily is still definitely processing the Lauren days through these chapters, while remembering the breakup all too well. That breakup will always stay with her, at least I think so. People you know - ooh yes, because that’s a major theme of Emily’s initial BAU arrival. She’s trying to balance the line of professional and personal, building relationships with the team and proving she belongs, but also not letting Aaron know just how badly he hurt her, and everything else too. It’s a blurred line indeed. I hope you have a great weekend too!