#affected by the whole thing

[that-wildwolf]

hey, remember being 18 years old and playing mass effect for the first time and it's got this like intense aura of being very small and very insignificant in a very big, very empty galaxy? remember playing mass effect for the first time and everything all of this is so new and mysterious, and it's 2am and you're sitting in a dark room in the light from your tv and you're playing through feros for the first time and you feel that this is someting very old and very ancient and you are somewhere you shouldn't be and you don't know what's going to happen or where you're going but you keep on. there's a tingling in your stomach and you're playing mass effect for the first time. the thorian is a milennia old sentient plant being. the rachni queen is old and telepathic and a hive mind and in pain. sovereign is an ancient machine that has not been built but is, and has always been, and this is something so alien and so unlike and beyond anything your human mind can comprehend, and this is something unexplainable and huge and as uncaring and indifferent as the empty galaxy around you. you're playing mass effect for the first time and you're walking on the surface of an almost completely empty planet with nothing but your two companions silently walking beside you and everything is so huge and empty and silent and you're so small and insignificant and it's so beautiful and so scary and you feel like you are on a rollercoaster about to drop down. you are playing mass effect for the first time and you're playing the mission on the moon and you stop and just look up at earth visible in the sky. you know this. this is home. you are playing mass effect for the first time, and the galaxy is so big, and you are so tiny, and everything is about to change for you.

[marggri]

Me and the guy I pulled by being quirky (mimagau if)

[chimaeraonwards]

no ai generated content will ever compare to the absolutely cartoonishly evil plot to cut down trees to prevent workers from striking to get livable wage.

[snailcubezz]

funnies aside about the catboy episode im starting to see a pattern

[boycaca]

I think the reason people believe chuuya would be the more open and affectionate in soukoku (as like. A romantic relationship) is because they believe him to be the mentally stable one and i think the reason people seem to believe he’s one of the few “mentally stable” characters in bsd is because he does not let himself be seen as vulnerable, and the few times we do see him go through something genuinely horrible and having a moment of vulnerability he does not really have the time to truly process it and ends up “moving on” pretty quickly (for example when he was at the flags’ funeral and adam interrupted him, or how when the sheep betrayed him dazai was immediately at his side trying to convince him to join the pm). And even if he does process it and thinks “man that was pretty fucked up wasnt it” it is never shown on screen so i feel like a lot of viewers end up seeing it as him not being bothered by these events and just a pretty chill dude that doesnt wallow in grief or self pity. But i think him never wallowing in grief or self pity is kind of a problem because in the end all he is doing is suppressing all that trauma and not really trying to acknowledge it, but at the same time when he does he ends up pinning the blame on himself (how the sheeps betrayal was his fault, the flags dying because of him). I feel like this impacts how affectionate he is too because he has built up so many walls that at the point when the flags make a party to celebrate the one year anniversary of him joining the pm he gets suspicious, then surprised and then flustered and tries acting like he doesnt care about it. All this is to say that i think him believing he cant show weakness and has to maintain the facade of being “the strongest” makes him seem like some regular degular guy (if he’s not fighting dragons) ends up him getting viewed as some mentally stable, communicative guy with maaaybe just a bit of anger issues when in reality he got so embarrassed by dazai’s corny speech in mersault that he shot him in the head with a gun

[vaguely-concerned]

'my cousin is all stomach and no heart' is such a funny thing for illario to tell rook if he maybe is picking up on a little bit of a Vibe going on there. the 'LMAO. well good luck with that friend. better hotties than you have tried and failed and dashed themselves against the legendarily unamorous cliffs of my cousin's complete obliviousness and lack of interest to no avail. (optional 'may I suggest a more hah-hem *undoes another few buttons on his shirt that thing is open almost to his navel now it's borderline obscene* available dellamorte for your consideration. I mean if you're like in the market for one anyway' devious undertone as you see fit)' energy is off the charts.

(illario is above all a funny petty bitch and that's why I love him so indescribably. no no lucanis is right we need him around to drop shade like this he is in fact also an essential crow. we all contribute in our own ways)

[kazz-brekker]

the book ice court heist has big group project involving people who don’t like each other vibes but the tv version is just going to be forced couples counseling via trying not to die together

[naamahdarling]

You know what? You know what I think?

I think that if we lived as we were meant to, in larger intimate ("extended family") groups and with more shared labor and time to do it (UBI NOW) people like me would not feel so useless and burdensome because there would be people around to help and to do what neurodivergent people can't while making valuable space for the neurodivergent to do what they ARE good at.

The way we live right now, all right, the way we live right now forces units of two adults to be able to do EVERYTHING or PAY to have someone come do it for them. I have to do the housework. I have to do it! But I am having to do a million different things and most of them I am not good at. I suck at them.

I wouldn't feel like shit, okay, if I had more than one other person around who was not a child and who could do the things I can't, like do the yard and cook and do repairs and basic maintenance; and someone else to split everything else that I like but is too much for me. It would free me to do what I am good at and enjoy. Cleaning, as in the sink and toilet, the windows, the blinds. Taking out trash. Folding, hanging, and sorting laundry.

But because all the shit I can do often relies on other shit being done first, and I can't do or have trouble doing those things, the shit I can do often can't be done. And even the shit I can do, I can't do ALL of it. So I can't keep up, and things get very bad.

We aren't meant to live like this. We are not meant to live like this.

That thought hurts so much because being able to flee the birth family is integral to survival for so many people. I'm so afraid that living in larger family groups would create more opportunities for, say, queer kids to be isolated, rejected, bullied, and abused. But if we gave people enough money to survive, and stopped considering children the property of their parents with no system in place to help them escape bad situations except a system that is often just as bad, just different.

I'm aware that communes and collectives aren't all that successful and are kind of a joke. I don't mean that. I mean a fundamental shift to multigenerational families where taking in "strays" (which my family did) is also normalized so people escaping abuse into existing households was accepted, with these families centered in maybe a couple of different larger residences so not everyone has to buy and maintain their own fucking washing machine and vacuum cleaner, and so people can benefit from large group meals that yield leftovers, and so child and elder care can also be centralized.

Then disabled people and the neurodivergent and sick and injured people, and pregnant people, and grieving people, would not have to either labor through all those stressors or consign themselves to living off an unlivable pittance or being put under legal guardianship.

I'm not saying anything new. People live like this in other parts of the world and maybe it sucks and I am wrong. But I'm just really mad right now because I can either do laundry or clean the sink but not both, and I really think we could improve society somewhat by making it so I did not have to choose one without sacrificing the other.

[fairyhaos]

cruelest thing that kpop has ever done is impose a "you can't eat anything" rule on their idols in the country that says "have you eaten today?" as a way of showing love

[markscherz]

tumblrs being transphobic, with the ceo himself starting an actual harassment campaign against a transfem & also banning transfems who post abt it.

Oh shit, I had not heard about that.

I would like to say I don’t understand why this shit keeps happening, but I actually do understand it way too well. It just makes me so sad and angry. Especially on a site where people find and make their communities.

So much of this is about ego, and the people with power wielding that power to protect themselves and failing to protect others with it. A mere hint of negative sentiment towards them is harassment that is dealt with immediately and harshly, but a dozen complaints about discrimination or threats or bullying take ages to process and frequently come to unsatisfactory moderation decisions.

Whatever the sentiments of the people running this hellsite, you are always welcome in my corner of the internet, wherever you find it. You are all wonderful, and we all deserve to feel that part of this space belongs to us and those to whom we can connect.

Transphobia has no place on tumblr, period. Or anywhere else in society for that matter. It is that which should be being rooted out.

[frankiebirds]

[kiragecko]

Authour’s Voices

I read fic for voice before anything else. Plot, tropes, canon compliance – they all pale in comparison to the word crafting. But voice is hard to describe, and referencing certain verbal tics is more likely to make an authour self-conscious than it is to flatter. So, here's my best attempt to describe the voices of some of my favourite fanfic authours – focusing on tone, subject matter, and the feelings they provoke, in a hope that I can get across at least a hint of how they sound.

@suzukiblu / suzukiblu / Rin (I read for DCU, Young Justice TV, Avatar)

REALLY intertwines characters thoughts and feelings in compelling ways. Inner monologues are a particular strength. Digs deep into what motivates characters and then lets them be insecure and angry because of those things. Writes REALLY close third person narration – ie. we are entirely in one person’s head, but the narration is using their name instead of saying ‘me.’ And we are ENTWINED in their head. Deeply. Maybe actually more in their chest -  the emotions are visceral and immediate. Very cathartic angry/overwhelmed ranting is a feature. People learning that they have inherent value. Romance/sex that is based on strong connections, and goes far deeper than hormones. A strong understanding of canon, used to write alternate universes that are much richer for that knowledge. Stories are cathartic, and leave you washed clean and energized.

@whetstonefires / Kieron_ODuibhir (/ Kieron) (I read for DCU, The Untamed/The Other Versions Of This Story)

Thoughtful, empathic stories that feel like they’ve spent months being refined to perfection. Also incredibly strong understanding of canon, with a much higher chance of showing her work on the page. A gift for searching out the nagging, poorly fitting pieces of canon characterization, and integrating them in her fic in ways that makes rereading the original a better experience. Beautiful, haunting, sentences. Feels like poetry makes me feel. A writing style that ALMOST feels intellectual, but is actually incredibly empathic. The knowledge is the vessel that carries the ... love? Respect? Maybe respect, and care, and dignity, that she has for the characters she’s writing about. Stories leave you quiet and satisfied.

@galaxystew / galaxysoup (I read for Avengers/Thor, Supernatural)

Careful, emotional, deep stories. There is a sense of immenseness, that the story can’t go too fast or it would become unstoppable. DEEPLY moving, gut-wrenching, stories told from just enough emotional distance to avoid overwhelming the audience. But they also about taking time to rest, both for the characters and the audience. Focuses on exploring and healing damaged relationships, (and damaged people), and never goes for the easy/trite solutions. Unassuming language and imagery that grounds the sometimes epic elements of her canons. Stories leave you grateful – grateful that the characters have reached that place, and grateful you got to come along.

@teland / Teland / Te (I read for DCU)

Stories have only the vestigial remains of a narrator. Almost everything is verbal or mental dialogue, usually without tags. (Ie. things like ‘Tim said.’) This would be frustrating with most writers, but Te’s character voices are SO strong and distinct that a story can start with an unnamed person talking and you immediately know who it is. She focuses on aspects of characters that many other authours miss (though some of that could be survivorship bias – perhaps she was part of a zeitgeist that hasn’t been preserved). She gets DEEP into the psyches of the characters she’s writing, dissects them, and then has them dryly comment on their displayed innards. Excels at characters that are very disconnected from their emotions, but also at characters who live immediately IN their emotions. Strong themes of identity and found family, though not in the way ‘found family’ is usually used these days. Symbolic, projected family? Stand-in, or sublimated, or substituted family? Something in that area. A lot of sex, which is also standing in for other things. Electric, transformative stories, with extremely long chapters that are hard to escape from when the world tries to call you back. Stories leave you alive to the possibilities, and maybe knowing more about yourself.

@angel-gidget / angel_gidget / Gidge (I read for DCU)

There’s an optimism and joy to Gidge’s writing. A ... cleanness. Hmm, what do I mean? I ... I’m not actually sure? But it feels refreshing and space-making, to read a Gidge story. It feels like they SHOULD be humorous, with the effects they have, but that’s not actually the focus? It feels like they’re light, even when the topic is heavy and treated seriously. It’s a really special gift, what Gidge has. Maybe the correct term is ‘conversational’? Yeah, there’s a matter-of-fact, conversational tone to everything she creates, and it lifts your spirits every time you read it.

@vmohlere / owlet (I read for Avengers/Captain America)

Absolutely brilliant way of using humour to tackle difficult subjects. Stories are so funny and positive, that it’s hard to realize how dark the things referenced are. It helps that they usually don’t become explicit until the characters have mostly processed them, and they’ve been defanged of a lot of their power. I’ve never seen someone else accomplish this, and it blows me away. Incredible OCs. Deep empathy for character’s specific needs, and focusing on what THEY’RE ready to focus on. Boundaries are not only respected, but taught. And all of this is happening behind a wry, clever sense of humour that invites you in to hang out for a while. One of the most joyful reading experiences I’ve ever had. I’ve used scenes to walk myself through bad mental periods. And I still think about their work every time I make a grilled cheese.

[cipheramnesia]

I'm trying to push "just" as a minimizer further out of my vocabulary, not to eliminate but to crack down on using it. I don't need to use it as often as I do, and then I'll poke around and see stuff like "it just happens to intersex people" or "intersexism is just an edge case" or other language along that lines, and that's kinda where I notice the word "just" has some claws deeper in my brain than I would like because it's super easy to roll with that. "Oh well that's fair it's just a little small amount." And that's just fucked up I think.

Cuz that sort of minimizing language has been around forever. Oh it's just intersex people, oh it's just trans people, oh it's just gay people, oh honestly, how much could that part of the population be, ten people? But it's always tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, millions however you cut it. Like you live in a small town, a thousand people, if intersex people are "just" one percent of the population, maybe ten people there might be intersex and you probably know one or two. You meet a hundred, a thousand people, more in your life, it means you probably met someone intersex or trans or queer or all of that. In a global population of seven billion people you can six degrees your way to famous actors Kevin Bacon and he's one guy. That "just" thing, that easy and agreeable minimizing sentiment, it's tricky and so I'm trying to make it a caution point. It's just language though, just one word that happens to be widely used by millions of people and which directs your brain to think a certain way because language is how we share our brains.

Anyway this is too long.

[corporealchaos]

You're only six years old. You're trying to be a ballerina, to be victorious, to dance better than any of the other girls. (You'll dance on their heads if you have to.) (Metaphorically.) You hope your parents can forgive you for being a bad little girl. You tell stories of them drinking too much and ignoring you for too long and making you fight a bear. (You lost.) But you also tell the story of how sometimes they said "I love you" by leaving an extra layer of dust for you to wipe away. Someday, that might lose its meaning, or take on a darker one. But you're young. You have time.

You're only six years old. You have trouble saying words, but you keep trying. You struggle with ballet, but you keep trying. You make jokes that most people don't laugh at, but you keep trying. You sing to yourself when you're lonely. You tell a little boy he can be whatever he wants to be. You laugh together. (It's fun.) You're reprimanded, but you still promise to teach him all you know. Someday, you might realize how brave you were. But you're young, and bravery looks so much like kindness.

You're only six years old. You've been forced to fight in a war you want no part in, used by the people who were supposed to protect you. You dance for royalty, but you will not slit their throats. (Maybe it's bravery. Maybe it's kindness. Maybe it's just the boy's voice in your head, telling you that you can be whatever you want to be.) You're cast out by the person who was supposed to care about you. (Maybe she never cared, or maybe she just doesn't know how to show it.) You leave, and the boy comes with you. You're not going to fight any battles that aren't your own. Someday, this will be a memory, and you'll be free. But right now, you're scared, and you're being forced to grow up too fast, and you're only six years old.

[scoriarose]

I'm thinking about how I've always been told, "Reptiles are incapable of love. They only use you for your body heat." But then I see my girls do this with each other- and they're both cold blooded.

When I let them play together, they are almost always together either cuddling or following each other around. Sakura does most of the following and seeks out here sibling if she's scared, but has also been very brave when she thought her sister needed protecting. If this is not love, what is it? And yes, Scoria is very loving with me too- but I find it hard to believe she only wants my body heat when she cuddles her sibling who doesn't have any.

If not love, it at the very least is more than seeking out body heat since that variable is removed between her sister and myself and she seeks both of us for cuddles and comfort. Her little sister will race to her sister and hide under her when she's scared, and Scoria has gone out of her way to comfort her sister at no other benefit to herself. I'm hoping to get similar actions on video as they regularly do these things with each other but it's hard to predict to have my camera filming.

I think sometimes Sakura likes together time a little more than Scoria, hahaha.

"Sister please, the door is only so big."

'I'm with you! ❤️ I do what you do! 🩷'

-Tolerates baby sister's shenanigans-

Anyway, the next time someone tells you your snake doesn't care about you and is only trying to steal your body heat, remember these girls who adore each other and have no body heat to steal.

[surreal-duck]

lullaby for another