#affected by the whole thing
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Incredibly tempted to write an analysis of each member of the Garuru Platoon both individually, in relation to each other, and in relation to their "counterpart" in the Keroro Platoon
#sgt frog#keroro gunso#over the years those guys have been the only ones which I have always loved consistently. it has been 10 literal years since I found out -#about their existance and I have loved them unconditionally ever since#as i got older my appreciation for them grew expontentially because I developed the ability to appreciate the fact that they are -#surprisingly complex characters in spite of their appearences on the show being so limited#even characters like say... tororo and taruru. which are the members of the platoon who are least used#and its a shame because they both are a delight#especially tororo. i am so angry that tororo never got his own episode... or an episode where he got to act solo#taruru had his little arc of going on earth by himself on a few occasions - zoruru has his whole thing with dororo ( don't get me wrong I -#still think he should have gotten more but considering his character arc it makes sense) - pururu had a whole huge arc on earth -#garuru had his random moments of dropping by casually/we have giroro to tell us about him every once in a while#all of them have these little moments. all except tororo. it makes me mad because tororo is the perfect example of how children on keron -#are exploited by the military at incredibly young ages and its very clear that this fucks them up in the long run. we have adult examples#like dororo. keroro. giroro. zoruru. list goes on. but tororo could have been a look into how a child (even one as smart as him) is -#affected by the whole thing#bc don't get me wrong tororo is a CHILD. he's not a tadpole in a tamama way where he's youthful in appearence but still implied to be a -#young adult. tororo is a straight up child. he can't be older than whatever the equivalent of fourteen is in keron years.#<- i have a reason behind why i say this but im tired rn LMAO#anyway yeah. live laugh love garuru platoon
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hey, remember being 18 years old and playing mass effect for the first time and it's got this like intense aura of being very small and very insignificant in a very big, very empty galaxy? remember playing mass effect for the first time and everything all of this is so new and mysterious, and it's 2am and you're sitting in a dark room in the light from your tv and you're playing through feros for the first time and you feel that this is someting very old and very ancient and you are somewhere you shouldn't be and you don't know what's going to happen or where you're going but you keep on. there's a tingling in your stomach and you're playing mass effect for the first time. the thorian is a milennia old sentient plant being. the rachni queen is old and telepathic and a hive mind and in pain. sovereign is an ancient machine that has not been built but is, and has always been, and this is something so alien and so unlike and beyond anything your human mind can comprehend, and this is something unexplainable and huge and as uncaring and indifferent as the empty galaxy around you. you're playing mass effect for the first time and you're walking on the surface of an almost completely empty planet with nothing but your two companions silently walking beside you and everything is so huge and empty and silent and you're so small and insignificant and it's so beautiful and so scary and you feel like you are on a rollercoaster about to drop down. you are playing mass effect for the first time and you're playing the mission on the moon and you stop and just look up at earth visible in the sky. you know this. this is home. you are playing mass effect for the first time, and the galaxy is so big, and you are so tiny, and everything is about to change for you.
#mass effect#wild rambles#i miss the feeling of playing that game for the first time#now i know everything and it isn't as mysterious and alluring anymore#getting lost in the tunnels on feros is one of my memories of all time. it just felt like... i was meant to get lost. there's Something her#i love the whole trilogy but man me1 really did have that sci-fi interstellar type of feeling the other two don't#also later they retconned the reapers as having actually been built by someone as opposed to ''this is so alien you can't understand it.#this is a machine without a creator. it has always existed. you are not meant to understand. this is so much bigger than you.''#which i really liked a lot more but like. whatever. im not in charge. they wanted to make things more palatable to the human mind when i#think the cosmic horror aspect of the reapers in me1 was one of the things that affected me the most#and made me stay with the series for as long as i did
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no ai generated content will ever compare to the absolutely cartoonishly evil plot to cut down trees to prevent workers from striking to get livable wage.
#tree law#sag strike#wga strike#also also it can be hard to admit but the US does set some industry standards so although im on the other side of the world its concerning!!#if bigwigs at US companies are screwing out their own workers what would this mean for those producing content in other countries?#what about our own local production companies that model american production houses?#oh we cant pay you a living wage cause thats industry standard. dont believe me? here is what a writer at X USA company at X TV show earns#also if you “cant afford” to pay your creatives a living wage then maybe you shouldnt be in charge#so yeah#i think this whole strike thing will affect more than just the US#just fucking pay your creatives
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Me and the guy I pulled by being quirky (mimagau if)
#re:zero#rezero#re zero#mimagau if#natsuki subaru#satella#me when I finally make a drawing that doesn’t include a character trapped in a grey void#I was thinking on how more creepy Satella’s and Subaru’s whole thing will be if the genders were flipped#tried to capture that#the way we see gender roles affects how we perceive things like this#so if Satella was male and Su was female it would come off as more concerning to the average eye
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the book ice court heist has big group project involving people who don’t like each other vibes but the tv version is just going to be forced couples counseling via trying not to die together
#obviously some of the crows in the books have plenty of history#but the show version will be like. kanej who managed to break up without every dating#wesper who will have progressed past the honeymoon stage into some possible distrust due to the van eck thing#and helnik being helnik which is a Whole Issue on its own#shadow and bone#six of crows#kanej#wesper#helnik#i reeeally want to know how wylan concealing his past will affect things with jesper#and kaz and inej on a job together after she left…oh boyyyy#fingers crossed we get that renewal and spin off
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You know what? You know what I think?
I think that if we lived as we were meant to, in larger intimate ("extended family") groups and with more shared labor and time to do it (UBI NOW) people like me would not feel so useless and burdensome because there would be people around to help and to do what neurodivergent people can't while making valuable space for the neurodivergent to do what they ARE good at.
The way we live right now, all right, the way we live right now forces units of two adults to be able to do EVERYTHING or PAY to have someone come do it for them. I have to do the housework. I have to do it! But I am having to do a million different things and most of them I am not good at. I suck at them.
I wouldn't feel like shit, okay, if I had more than one other person around who was not a child and who could do the things I can't, like do the yard and cook and do repairs and basic maintenance; and someone else to split everything else that I like but is too much for me. It would free me to do what I am good at and enjoy. Cleaning, as in the sink and toilet, the windows, the blinds. Taking out trash. Folding, hanging, and sorting laundry.
But because all the shit I can do often relies on other shit being done first, and I can't do or have trouble doing those things, the shit I can do often can't be done. And even the shit I can do, I can't do ALL of it. So I can't keep up, and things get very bad.
We aren't meant to live like this. We are not meant to live like this.
That thought hurts so much because being able to flee the birth family is integral to survival for so many people. I'm so afraid that living in larger family groups would create more opportunities for, say, queer kids to be isolated, rejected, bullied, and abused. But if we gave people enough money to survive, and stopped considering children the property of their parents with no system in place to help them escape bad situations except a system that is often just as bad, just different.
I'm aware that communes and collectives aren't all that successful and are kind of a joke. I don't mean that. I mean a fundamental shift to multigenerational families where taking in "strays" (which my family did) is also normalized so people escaping abuse into existing households was accepted, with these families centered in maybe a couple of different larger residences so not everyone has to buy and maintain their own fucking washing machine and vacuum cleaner, and so people can benefit from large group meals that yield leftovers, and so child and elder care can also be centralized.
Then disabled people and the neurodivergent and sick and injured people, and pregnant people, and grieving people, would not have to either labor through all those stressors or consign themselves to living off an unlivable pittance or being put under legal guardianship.
I'm not saying anything new. People live like this in other parts of the world and maybe it sucks and I am wrong. But I'm just really mad right now because I can either do laundry or clean the sink but not both, and I really think we could improve society somewhat by making it so I did not have to choose one without sacrificing the other.
#im feverish feeling (not a real fever just malaise that i have no other way to describe) from the IBS (which can affect you like that#)#and i don't actually want to do ANYTHING#i would have to even living with others but it would be easier#at the very least i wouldn't have had to clean the microwave earlier which is hard because my arms are like the size of a meerkat's#and i can only reach the back with my fingertips#where is my BF in all this?#WORKING FULL TIME WITH BACK PAIN#yes i AM going to want him to have to do as little as possible when he comes home#he's neurodivergent too and struggles with the same shit#it's all a mess#we are doing way better i didn't realize how deep a drain three very sick cats were#but there's still only two of us#if you are disabled physically OR MENTALLY you should at least get in-home household help once a week or so#there's places that do that but the limitations are usually severe and always rule me out#because im not single im not an elder im not a veteran and im not physically disabled#if we have to ration that sort of thing i can see how on the whole it is more caring to allocate those resources to for example elders#but the fact that i celebrate what help there is doesn't mean i don't get mad that more people can't access it#is2g if i was functional enough snd physically sound enough i would start a charity that did intervention cleaning for people like us#who have fallen behind and can't catch up but can MAINTAIN#and who helped people clean for a few months during and after an illness pregnancy trauma major loss etc. so they could stay on their feet
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cruelest thing that kpop has ever done is impose a "you can't eat anything" rule on their idols in the country that says "have you eaten today?" as a way of showing love
#yena talks#so much of korean... affection? centers around eating and eating well and asking if youve eaten as a sign of love and concern#bc historically it just holds so much significance to like. actually have enough to eat that the question is engraved into our culture#and rvery time fans ask idols if theyve eaten it always come from a place of love but it breaks my heart because it's just so so likely that#the answer they give is either a) a lie or b) misleading because theyre not allowed to eat as much as they ought#also just the symbolism. “have you eaten today” = i love you; “you cant eat” = the opposite of that#like the whole diet culture/ obsession with looking perfect is of course so damaging by itself but it feels even more cruel like this yk#this is an exaggeration btw like i know kpop has done way worse things but this still breaks my heart
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tumblrs being transphobic, with the ceo himself starting an actual harassment campaign against a transfem & also banning transfems who post abt it.
Oh shit, I had not heard about that.
I would like to say I don’t understand why this shit keeps happening, but I actually do understand it way too well. It just makes me so sad and angry. Especially on a site where people find and make their communities.
So much of this is about ego, and the people with power wielding that power to protect themselves and failing to protect others with it. A mere hint of negative sentiment towards them is harassment that is dealt with immediately and harshly, but a dozen complaints about discrimination or threats or bullying take ages to process and frequently come to unsatisfactory moderation decisions.
Whatever the sentiments of the people running this hellsite, you are always welcome in my corner of the internet, wherever you find it. You are all wonderful, and we all deserve to feel that part of this space belongs to us and those to whom we can connect.
Transphobia has no place on tumblr, period. Or anywhere else in society for that matter. It is that which should be being rooted out.
#this is not related to herpetology#except that it is#because trans rights as well as those of every other member of LGBTQ+ affect every field#every fandom#every one#this is the first time ever I have written out a long tag rant and decided it needed to go into the main body of the post instead#meaning I had to type the whole thing again because you cannot easily copy and paste large numbers of tags#But I think it is important to see the full message from the start#rather than relying on someone else to screencap it#which I always appreciate#but not everyone always sees#anyway I am sorry especially to those in the community who are trans and who feel this most acutely#I stand with you#and I think the bulk of the community here does too#and that voice is something the leaders need to listen to#virtue signalling is not enough#actions speak louder than words#okay real tags now for searchability purposes:#about me#tumblr#trans issues#transphobia#transgender
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#RAHHHH their friendship means so much to me#hotch has his moments with the whole team but garcia is really the only one he regularly shows this amount of affection towards#and i think he's far less prickly about the affection she shows to him than he is with other people. he can accept it from her#oh i might write a whole thing on this later but. the team needs garcia in exactly the same way she needs to surround herself w nice things#if that makes sense#penelope garcia#aaron hotchner#garcia & hotch#not fic#criminal minds#criminal minds rewatch#criminal minds s04e09#criminal minds 4x9#52 pickup#my gifs
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I'm trying to push "just" as a minimizer further out of my vocabulary, not to eliminate but to crack down on using it. I don't need to use it as often as I do, and then I'll poke around and see stuff like "it just happens to intersex people" or "intersexism is just an edge case" or other language along that lines, and that's kinda where I notice the word "just" has some claws deeper in my brain than I would like because it's super easy to roll with that. "Oh well that's fair it's just a little small amount." And that's just fucked up I think.
Cuz that sort of minimizing language has been around forever. Oh it's just intersex people, oh it's just trans people, oh it's just gay people, oh honestly, how much could that part of the population be, ten people? But it's always tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, millions however you cut it. Like you live in a small town, a thousand people, if intersex people are "just" one percent of the population, maybe ten people there might be intersex and you probably know one or two. You meet a hundred, a thousand people, more in your life, it means you probably met someone intersex or trans or queer or all of that. In a global population of seven billion people you can six degrees your way to famous actors Kevin Bacon and he's one guy. That "just" thing, that easy and agreeable minimizing sentiment, it's tricky and so I'm trying to make it a caution point. It's just language though, just one word that happens to be widely used by millions of people and which directs your brain to think a certain way because language is how we share our brains.
Anyway this is too long.
#just#idk i saw the whole intersex dismissal thing again and was gonna make a shitpost but i had feelings#it just affects intersex people okay what if eagles just carried you into the middle of the ocean#long post#ciper just stop
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I'm thinking about how I've always been told, "Reptiles are incapable of love. They only use you for your body heat." But then I see my girls do this with each other- and they're both cold blooded.
When I let them play together, they are almost always together either cuddling or following each other around. Sakura does most of the following and seeks out here sibling if she's scared, but has also been very brave when she thought her sister needed protecting. If this is not love, what is it? And yes, Scoria is very loving with me too- but I find it hard to believe she only wants my body heat when she cuddles her sibling who doesn't have any.
If not love, it at the very least is more than seeking out body heat since that variable is removed between her sister and myself and she seeks both of us for cuddles and comfort. Her little sister will race to her sister and hide under her when she's scared, and Scoria has gone out of her way to comfort her sister at no other benefit to herself. I'm hoping to get similar actions on video as they regularly do these things with each other but it's hard to predict to have my camera filming.
I think sometimes Sakura likes together time a little more than Scoria, hahaha.
"Sister please, the door is only so big."
'I'm with you! ❤️ I do what you do! 🩷'
-Tolerates baby sister's shenanigans-
Anyway, the next time someone tells you your snake doesn't care about you and is only trying to steal your body heat, remember these girls who adore each other and have no body heat to steal.
#snake#snakes#hognose#pets#cute#Honestly I think it says more about the person who says snakes can't love#They haven't experienced it#and snakes take more time and trust building than dogs#snakes understand consent too#if you do things without their consent they remember and will have more reasons to dislike you than like you#Just because someone has worked with snakes over 20 years and never seen affection doesn't mean it doesn't exist#any more than someone who has worked with flour for over 20 years and never seen a cake thinks they're a myth#“Well if it were possible I'd have seen at least one by now.”#Not if you just kept it in bags the whole time#Takes more than keeping#But the stories I've heard#I know other keepers have felt the love too#edit because something was happening with mobile earlier that prevented me from posting properly#Had to get on a PC
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lullaby for another
#duck scribbles#minicomic tag#midoyuzu#ittle scenario i made up in my head post-home party when all of them stay the night over at tori's#midori who couldnt sleep wanders around for a bit and runs into yuzuru and they chat a bit!!! to help her fall asleep#yuzurus mostly humming to himself and yeah. aha#enstars#midori takamine#yuzuru fushimi#yuzumido#ensemble stars#need to balance out the sap from recent one way or another my last one was. wow what were you on#hey fun fact ive never listened to yuzurus solo (that i dont even dare name lest this guy festers into my brain even more)#any more than three whole times during the approaching 2 years ive been into this series. its awful the things it makes me feel#i love drawing them together but like.... im sure hed be somewhat aware of his own standing in regards to yuzurus attentions and affections
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So much (for) Stardust
Day 1 of ISAT month "Stardust"
#isatmonth#in stars and time#isat#isat siffrin#isat loop#isat fanart#isat art#my art#i know im late#but i had to redraw this 10000 times because i can't draw arms and that affected the whole thing#anyway#stardust is just loop dandruff#no one ever talks about that#but it's interesting to think about#i think as long as i post the art in june then it still counts
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interesting how in the FA "beyond lay the wilderness of Dungortheb, where the sorcery of Sauron and the power of Melian came together, and horror and madness walked", then in the TA the Fangorn-Lorien-Mirkwood triangle of Weird Sorcery Forests exists between the domains of saruman, galadriel, necromancer-sauron, and radagast
#silm#silmarillion#lotr#the hobbit#nan dungortheb#fangorn forest#lothlorien#mirkwood#nan dungortheb had the original spawn of ungoliant; southern mirkwood has the giant spiders (probably lesser spawn)#all three forests were thought cursed in some way (fangorn's huorns + general ominousness; the mini-girdle in lorien)#the weird dol guldur area in southern mirkwood). mirkwood also has the dream-river and the possibly-magic-affected white deer in the hobbit#plus the way it slopes just right to appear endless from within#like. that's a whole lot of maia-power concentrated in one area#and that's coming from at least four distinct ainurin domains (aule; melian/vana; melkor; yavanna)#five if you count the balrog as a separate umaia; and double yavanna if the ents count as well#not to mention nenya doing its thing#and at least one palantir and possibly some dwarf rings in the mix#and also the concerning amount of enchanted dwarf stuff + enchanted celebrimbor stuff#no wonder the rohirrim think the whole place is cursed#also on the other side of the mountains you have elrond with his ulmo-magic and melian-magic and vilya#but hes not as close to saurons borders so rivendell is just Cool Elf Magic and not Terrifying Sorcery lol
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Dungeon lord Chilchuck
What would his wish as a dungeon lord be? What would he be like? Headcanons & speculation post for fun. But I’ll start with analytic lead up because that’s always fun for me, though feel free to skip and skim.
When it comes to what Chilchuck’s dungeon lord desires could/would be like we have mainly 3 hints: His nightmare, his succubus and what the winged lion says to him.
Why: — From what we see nightmares are based on the person’s worst fears and insecurities, both Laios’ and Marcille’s nightmare were closely tied to their dungeon lord wishes (Laios’ dream monster being summoned to crush the ghosts of relationships that represented the pressure to fit in and belong, Marcille seeking control over death and aging through magic to avoid loss), the fuel behind their desire/goal if you will. Fear and deep-seated desires are seemingly closely tied, something also supported by Thistle and Mithrun’s reigns as dungeon lords (Thistle proving his worth through fulfilling his given duty + protecting his loved ones, being listened to instead of having to listen, Mithrun escaping rigid two-faced elven society and living in a wonderland where he has no enemies and he’s loved, free from everyone he knew yet propped up by the person symbolizing his brother being chosen over him, the bastard child).
— I’ve talked about the significance I assign to the succubi often by now, but rundown: What we see of each character is all very telling if you care to listen, it shows not only someone’s "ideal form" but what they want from it. Izutsumi’s is familial, offering a hug and comfort, Marcille’s is romantic with a character she knows and loves, offering a kiss on a hand and a connection regardless of how distant it actually is, and Laios’ is platonic, arguable at first but then Laios’ fear of judgement is placated and he is offered the picture perfect friend group that accepts his interest (if you want my full look at Laios’ succubus go here). They take on the most alluring form, most ideal person of their victim, even uncovering deep subconscious desires, so precisely and effectively to the point it leaves victims physically frozen before the object of their desire. Succubi and the demon are themselves tied in lore and it’s easy to see how similar their core skill are. Succubi don’t give a good idea of what a character would wish for on their own but they certainly give hints on what they crave, regardless of how you want to read it.
— Last bit is self-explanatory. To placate Chilchuck and win his compliance over, the monster that reads your soul like an open book offers to give him something specific. But! It’s also important to remember that the lion isn’t offering to fulfill Chilchuck’s dream world wish here, it’s a second prize, because his goal with what he promised Laios is that they’d stay in this world, away from everyone and everything else. Chilchuck wants to get away but is kept back, and it’s here the lion placates him with "hey it’s okay! You can’t do that but I can still give you this! This is enough right? It’ll make everything easier on you".
What each bit says: — Long version in another post. Tldlr: His daughters and family are obviously important to him, and this reinforces that he takes on the role of protector a lot, he’s constantly worried for his party members’ lives and implicitly his family’s. Safety and stability, both economical and otherwise, are his core values and goals, and he berates both others and himself if someone fails on those fronts. Here, there’s the fear of not being enough, of not having been able to protect, and of course of loss.
— Chil’s succubi are obviously sexual, and not only that but agressively and straightforwardly so. It’s not like Marcille’s where there’s personality involved, all they do is give him sultry looks and pretty smiles before jumping on him. His succubi aren’t like Izutsumi’s, always the same exact person and appearance, so it’s not someone but an appealing general idea. The idea of a sexual being he can regard as simply a gorgeous piece of meat and a good time no strings attached. In my interpretation, especially with my reading of Laios’ succubus where even with deep-seated desires negative emotions can be too intense to effectively freeze a victim, I think this doesn’t contradict his character. Relationships have been painful to him in the past, in the succubus scene when his wife gets mentioned his immediate reaction is to yell "Don’t bring her up now!", like with his habit of drinking and as a tallman liking his senses feeling dulled, it’s about not having to feel emotions with how difficult they are to deal with sometimes and just feeling good, or at least not having to think, for a while. If a succubus showcases someone’s ideal connection with an ideal person, then Chilchuck’s is with a pretty person that doesn’t stir any negative memory or drama, someone low stakes and low maintenance that doesn’t require him to manage or talk out feelings because there’s none involved in the first place.
— Once more, wife and family are important! He does long for his family, not only his wife but his daughters, and vice versa. This suggests not only that he wants good relationships with them but that he wants them to be with him, a family life. Far from the cut communication they all more of less have during canon, and perhaps far from their life pre-canon when he worked away from home a significant amount of time. We’ve seen recreations of people by the winged lion before with doppelgangers and monsters (naga), and though he claims he can make satisfying imitations, what we’ve seen is that they base themselves on the best memories of that person, like with Marcille’s dad, or twist behavior to be more pleasant, like Mithrun’s lover (and possibly twist appearances depending on the person’s view of them, but that’s Mithrun analysis). The line does suggest Chilchuck would want his family members as they are in reality and not idealized versions, but the circumstances are chaotic and urgent enough in the scene (and again the lion isn’t fulfilling Chilchuck’s wish but trying to make him content for Laios’) that it could just be the winged lion saying what he needs to to convince him the fastest possible, and like we see with Laios that can crumble to give way to deeper or more complex desires.
On top of that we just have general info on Chil. How does Chilchuck deal w his issues? What does he like to do? He likes alcohol and ignoring his problems. We have to remember there is a split between what someone would consciously wish for and what their soul uncontrollably irrationally craves. As always with Dunmeshi, there’s a narrative of irrational deep-seated desires vs active wants, what you crave vs what you strive for, what you dream of vs what’s actually good for you, the animal vs the human inside you, heart vs mind. Chilchuck craving a harem of hot babes in his fantasies but wanting his family life & wife back again is not mutually exclusive. You may crave becoming a monster and tasting what humans are like a little but still want to save the world & your friends more.
Btw can we adress the irony of him terrified of being the last one alive, of being left by his daughters and wife, of having left and coming back home one day to see everything gone or rampaged, yet not caring about dying of liver failure himself, knowing every time that he enters a dungeon there’s a real risk he may not come out. Die somewhere I can’t see you. I prefer leaving you than being left behind. He’s selfish and shortsighted like that… Chilchuck is selfless in many ways of course, but perhaps also due to his own relationship with his parents, he often undermines the effects he has on others in his relationships, both the good and the bad (he talks himself down about being cowardly and greedy yes, but never hints at his bad health habits, alcoholism and starving himself, may have affected his loved ones, doesn’t question his wife falling into a bad mood the night before she left, and talks about the possibility of dying here and there very casually, though obviously he tries his best to stay alive when it doesn’t concern his health).
Chilchuck king of "Let me just avoid and ignore my problems surely they’ll go away, things might work out and if they don’t well tough luck I’ll survive and I probably deserve it anyways". If I don’t look at it it will dissapear <3 Why care when you can simply not think about it.
You might not understand Mister "my love will stay strong through months of work travel and also 4 years of separation" and Mister "well idk my siblings and me are kinda strangers and my dad is dead but that’s kinda whatever", but typically relationships need some form of maintenance and emotional availability…
The actual headcanons finally
I kinda have 2 routes in mind for dunlord Chil and both of them are centered on "I care too much, i wish things were easy", so first is a lot like his succubi, it’s full on indulging in his guilty pleasures like alcohol and bodies and it’s to keep him in a constant state of thrill and euphoria and distracted, unfeeling about stuff that really matters. "Nothing matters except that I’m enjoying the moment!" vibe. He gets to live a life worthy of Dionysus, with alcohol and women and debauchery and like— never having to think again, never having to feel anything but pleasure again, never have to feel guilty or shitty or angry or sad. He has a harem and gets everything on a silver platter.
Breaking news demon magic-induced rush of euphoria and power still not enough to cure this man of his self-hatred nor his capacity for thought!! But in his case a state of euphoria is what he seeks I think, to kinda mask or replace the Everything Else.
The other is what I think closer to what canon suggests, with what WL implied too with "I’ll make you a new wife and kids like the originals!! 😊", it’s a (spoilers) Wandavision type thing where it’s a slice of life where he’s never at work and always at home and the family eats lunches at the dinner table together and everything and everyone at any moment is just. Happy. No issues. It was all a dream, this is real and everything is fine and your family is perfect and happy. I like to think the timeline would be wonky, his daughters would fluctuate in age, but he’d want to be there for what he missed, would want them to still rely on him and look up to him like when they were young, would like to forget that they’re now independent adults and the distance that grew between Chilchuck and his siblings is happening between them as well. Chil would want doppelgangers of his family imo, at its core just a general wish for a peaceful happy family life with no drama, no need to compromise, a little paradise of unconditional love and no consequences. It’s for sure straightforward, but Chilchuck is a man with straightforward desires…
But see Chilchuck is a greedy man, and he wants it both ways without having to sacrifice anything or expanding any efforts himself. He wants to have his cake and eat it too. I think playing with these two opposite directions and mixing and matching is most fun. Him leading a life where he indulges in all his worst habits while still having everything he wants… Him getting to have BOTH his wife and any woman he can imagine up, his life like two sides of a coin he can flip at any moment where he’s partying then he’s at home enjoying the quiet and his toddler daughters playing with toys on the carpet. Christ when you remember it’s all an illusion that’s terrifying, the doppelgangers and succubi from the winged lion playing chilchuck ping pong.
A safe little haven both security-stability wise and emotionally. Gets to have both the relaxing and the thrilling in any dose he wants, mixed or separatedly. What I’d argue he had pre-canon too: Can live it up in taverns away from home, stays away from home for long periods of time, and can come back to home aka the symbol of relaxation and safety whenever he decides to. Something he can leave and come back to at will, an anchor he can trust in (until it’s taken from him and his wife leaves. Or in his worse nightmare people rush in and kill his daughters). The ideal of a house and family to a working man, perhaps…
I think it’s fun to think on wether or not these desires would be interesting at all to the winged lion… In canon he seeks out "rare/complex desires", common simple things like I imagine riches, sex, substances and pleasure would be are boring to him, he’s eaten those so many times already. So perhaps he wouldn’t last long as a dunlord, the WL would want to eat him fully quick, can’t keep him interested or waiting long for a meager meal, too much effort raising the cattle and too low quality meat. By making it more twisted or layered Chil’s desire would become more desirable to the demon, it’s part of what’s fun with the third option to me. But whatever. Has he ever eaten a guy with this much repression and self-sabotage... Like trying to get the meat out of a walnut, enrichment…
Other dunlord Chil takes I’ve seen that are fun and good:
@feelo-fick and @pluvio-floret have a dunlord Chilchuck AU project dubbed "tragedy AU" where Chilchuck is said to be "on vacation", in a weird delirious state, only half-there half of the time… From which he doesn’t want to wake up </3 Quoting Feelo, this is why the vacation thing is only a half-joke cause he is 1) letting all his responsibilities go 2) indulging in himself and 3) "spending time with his family" <- lie but you get what i mean. Additional comments that have me vigorously nodding: because changing is hard why cant things just be okay right now without the effort !!! Life is hard he’s so so tired he just wants to feel good… he just wants life to feel nice and easy for a sec while he can learn to breathe again and lose the stress and trauma he’s accumulated…….. spoiler alert yes !!! in fact a depressed person can suck themselves into their job and lock out the world who wouldve thought !!!
And then Cabinette I know posted about his dunlord take once but I don’t have the link, in which Chil has a lot of nosebleeds because of mana overload which is fun and interesting to think about imo~
In dunmeshi, where characters get underground pockets of the world as their playground disconnected from everything outside and the rest of the world, it’s important to remember to face reality even if it has conflict and people with different views and stances from you, it’s something Chilchuck and Marcille and everyone needed to learn, and the thing with a dungeon lord AU is that you imagine a timeline where he fails to <3
A timeline where his dungeon lord wish is to desire nothing bc hope and want has only ever hurt him would also go so hard. Very universal thing though I suppose.
… And this is why a Chilchuck-centric Coraline AU is really really interesting and fitting and topical— Ok that’ll go in a separate reblog/post at @Fumiku I need to let this end
#Dungeon meshi#chilchuck tims#Analysis#dungeon lord chilchuck#Spoilers#dungeon meshi manga spoilers#Wish we could put just parts of a post under a ‘click to read more’ box that scrolls open and closes neatly#Bc 3/4th of the post is just extra explanation for ppl who don’t See The Vision already but like that’s not what i wanted most of the post#to be really gdbdg#Headcanons#You could say the family also represents something he’s built up with how own hands. If he has self-worth issues and thinks he’s a screw-up#in the virtue/honor and likability department especially— his family destroyed/killed also represents the one biggest good thing#he’s done/created crumbling also. Like his wife leaving without a word while he trusted their relationship this can hugely impact#one’s sense of identity and self-worth and what you’re living life for. In his case it’s not too surprising he turned to simple#physical pleasures for comfort and enjoyment. Like with tasting good food having moments feeling good keeps you going#He always focuses on the bad relationships bring and never the good aghhhh#The reverse of Marcille who often idealizes. They both ignore problems in their relationships in opposite ways.#What do you mean why do i bring up marcille. Okay yes this’ll get a marchil Fumiku short brainstorm reblog as well#Chilchuck is so… curse of having feelings and not realizing the extent of them. Underestimating how much you care#It’s either ‘i���m fine who cares’ or falling into the pits of despair and blaming himself n spilling his whole bag no inbetween#Dunmeshi succubus#Fumi rambles#boy that’s what this boils down to i suppose#Family angst “Hey I came back home from work and i’m tired so don’t talk to me about problems or anything k? I’m here to relax smh damn”#< unwilling to admit he has issues he should be working on or that some things are affecting others negatively#Chil you are so enneagram 6w7 <3
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NEIL PATRICK HARRIS as Michael & PETER PORTE as Josh 2022 • UNCOUPLED • S1·EP5
#they had the most extraordinary conversation in this scene -#he wanted to botox his arsehole so his huge member cud fit & i woz yelling inwardly for a whole hr?#is that a thing that happens? omfg??#the show itself is like sex and the city if carrie bradshaw woz a 50 yo gay bloke w/ 1990s dialogue & plot devices#can be teeth gnashing at times#neil patrick harris#peter porte#lgbtedit#uncoupled#uncoupled showtime#kiss#gay couple#gay#lgbt#uncouplededit#romancegifs#queer media#couple#intimacy#affection#longing#desire#amor#passion#romantic#queer
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