#act like women aren’t actively pushed into

[mmaryoliver]

“my dream is to get married, have children and be a stay at home mom”

is it really your dream or has it been the only option given to you? think about it, if you hadn’t been given baby dolls, play kitchens, and consumed media where a woman is happy after getting married and having children, would that still be your dream? If you grew up in a world where men weren’t the top priority, what would your dreams be?

[wetsocksinbed]

dropping some lore for my followers, but here’s a list of things that the doomsday cult I was raised in banned and forbade:

• Celebrating your birthday. I’m 24 next month and it’ll be my first birthday

• Celebrate Christmas, Halloween and Easter. All stem from pagan beliefs (yes including Christmas), which is “satanic”

• Do afterschool activities like joining a sports team or a club. You risk being “influenced by the world” and may be “tricked into joining Satan’s world”

• Have friends that weren’t part of the religion. We could play with kids at school but god forbid we asked mum and dad if those kids could come over to play. See above for reason why.

• Have sex before marriage. Even kissing someone on the lips is seen as taboo.

• Be anything other than Straight. You’re obviously mentally ill, you’re confused, it’s just a phase, it’s Satans World

• Seek higher education after high school. This is considered viewing yourself as better than others. Also you might “be influenced by satans world” and “commit immoral acts” if you’re around people who aren’t part of your religion. Instead you’re pushed to become a missionary and preach in places “where the need is great” aka poor and impoverished places

• Own anything expensive. You clearly think you’re better than everyone else

• Like a band/singer/actor and own posters of them. This is considered idolatry.

• Get tattoos or piercings. One lobe piercing one each ear was acceptable though.

• Dye your hair a colour that wasn’t brown, black or blonde. You’re being influenced by the world.

• Wear trousers/pants to church. Only men are allowed that. Women must wear a dress or skirt.

• Have a role in the church. Only men can give talks/sermons or “shepherd the flock”

• Wear a head covering if you say a prayer in a room with a man who is in the church. You must show submission to him in front of god

• Never get divorced. If you do, then you’re forbidden from marrying again

• Have any opinions that differ from the general belief of the church. If you don’t believe humanity started 6000 years ago in Eden, you’re essentially a heretic.

[cinnamonest]

Hiii I absolutely adore your work!! You're legit my favorite fic writer, every word you put down is gospel amen 🙏 If youre still doing requests, maybe what about albedo x tall reader? I love how you write him so much, im 6ft tall myself and am fiending for yan stuff for tall girls since tall women are always written to be strong and dominant which kills me inside since im the total opposite...

Luckily he's not really insecure about it or anything, not like one of those people who gets all neurotic and has a complex. It's just. You know. He wouldn't mind getting a bit taller, is all. But if he ever starts getting too hung up over it, the feeling then loops back to feeling embarrassed over being insecure over something like that, so he tries to just ignore any feelings on it entirely.

He does handle your greater stature than himself better than some other, more insecure short boys, though. So long as you don’t bring the matter up, he won’t either. He genuinely doesn’t care about having others poke fun at him, which some of the knights he works with certainly do, given that it’s not everyday you see a guy with a girlfriend so much taller than himself, but he has very little regard for the opinions of those he doesn’t care much about and is thus largely unaffected.

He does, however, care what you think. He’s the sort of person who buries any insecurities he may have and ensures he never brings them up or makes them known, but he does worry just a bit that you wish he was taller, that it compromises the respect you have for him, or worse, that you’ll get wandering eyes… he feels sick to his stomach if he sees you talking to some tall guy, even more so than the sickness he already feels seeing you talk to anyone.

And even if you tease him about the matter, he handles that very well, albeit with a twitching to his smile that you may notice if you look carefully. He wants to give off the impression that it doesn’t bother him, even if it kinda does, just a little.

This also ends up accelerating his obsessive tendencies, the insecurity gets to him and he acts more impulsively and more recklessly than he would normally, and you’ll find that the situation between you escalates much faster to the point of captivity.

Regardless, you have no need to worry. The man does not have a submissive bone in his body… unnaturally so, even.

Like you know how, as a general rule, most men tend to lean towards dominant tendencies and aren’t really submissive per se, but are still gonna salivate and get into it if you “take charge”?

He’s not even like that. The notion of you having any sort of control or autonomy in the matter sort of… bothers him. He’s too obsessively fixated on control, and uses sex as a catharsis by which having control and seeing that control actively exerted on you brings him satisfaction and comfort and assurance, so any bit of said control being taken away gets under his skin fast.

Enthusiasm would be a pleasant surprise, sure, he likes you participating, but any time you attempt to actively control the steps and movement, or gods forbid try to push him to do or move in the way you want, he gets a little… twitchy. He’s not one to vocalize his thoughts too much, but you notice pretty much immediately, you can tell it irks him that you’re moving too much on your own, based on the firm grabs to your sides and wrists and efforts to quietly contort your body the way he wants you to, and a heavy huff of frustration when you fail to comply or try to go back to the position you were in before. It feels wrong, you should be bending and moving to the way his hands and words guide you, and failure to abide by it only strengthens the intensity of the impulse to force you under it by any means necessary.

Should you be a particularly bratty type, you can use this to your advantage by intentionally continuously breaking out of his hold or pushing back against the way he tries to push you into certain positions and outright disobeying… but that’s one of those “playing with fire” type of behaviors, and it stops being so amusing when he’s got you on your knees, held up by a fistful of hair, looming over you with an ominous, icy stare… and you may find yourself regretting your defiance, and up may be the only direction you get to look at him from now on.

[eddiegettingshot]

i know everyone ignores 6x14 because their favorite white boy wasn't the centre of attention for once but. - not to be controversial on main but I think a lot of takes come from either people who genuinely haven't watched some of the eps/entirety of season 1 and watch via gifs and those who are so deep in the ao3 sauce that canon has kind of become null. Just look at how people still talk about Chris as a little kid or the Diaz parents. Eddie, despite functioning fine by himself, has been attempting to put himself out there because we know its not what he wants. He's a "nester", he likes being married etc. Thats what makes this sl more fucked. He's messy but has at least been attempting to move forward.

no i fully agree lol i feel like people have been consuming the show solely through gifs and other people’s meta instead of actually watching it, which is why “eddie’s trying to check the boxes” and “eddie’s relationships haven’t worked out because he’s been trying to recapture what he thinks he had with shannon and subconsciously replace her since she died” - the latter being an internal issue that he has literally never even recognized as being a thought pattern let alone a problem - has turned into “eddie is actively and knowingly hunting down (a large number of) women and pursuing them with the sole intent of making them christopher’s stepmother, then discarding them when it doesn’t work out that way, to the extent that christopher realizes that this is happening and feels shame and anger over his father’s behavior.”

like this is not what’s happening! at all! if you actually watch the show and pay any attention to his interactions with people who aren’t buck this is very clear! this is also why it annoys me so much when people try to make his panic attacks over ana about him being gay - HE WAS PANICKING BECAUSE HE ACTUALLY DIDN’T WANT ANA TO BE CHRIS’S MOTHER AND HE DIDN’T WANT HER TO BE HIS WIFE, HE JUST THOUGHT THAT WAS THE EXPECTATION HE NEEDED TO MEET (AGAIN, SUBCONSCIOUSLY, AFTER NO LESS THAN 3 PEOPLE PUSHED HIM INTO THE RELATIONSHIP)!!!!!! HE SAYS THAT OUTRIGHT TO BUCK WHEN HE SAYS HE’S NOT READY FOR A READYMADE FAMILY!!! i know the show likes to rewrite some things but what is happening right now?

that’s also why i’m so confused about people acting like buck’s (and even chris’s) first instinct should be to get angry and turn eddie away and call him out for being awful - maybe that would be the response if eddie did have a habit of going through women and cheating and leaving them for the next pseudo-shannon. but actually the fact that eddie is lying to his best friend and cheating on his perfect girlfriend and risking putting his kid in a bad place is indicative of a real crisis-level issue with his grief and trauma (which buck has had a front-row seat to) in an unbelievably fucked up one-in-a-million situation. cheating is obviously fucking horrible and wrong - eddie is doing it because he’s being self-destructive and not thinking rationally! ANYONE WHO ACTUALLY KNOWS HIM WILL KNOW THIS!!!

i literally hate this storyline and i understand that it’s controversial and that’s fine, but genuinely some of the takes i’ve been reading suggest unironically that a lot of people DO actually need to watch the show. because wtf do you mean eddie needs to learn to be alone?

[wildpeachfarm]

this is meant lighthearted : instead of “all men are trash, women do no wrong” a secret third thing “PEOPLE suck in general”

as someone who grew up with an absent father who tried to make life difficult for my mother once she took him to court for child support for me and my siblings - ing…I grew up with a not nice view of older men BUT my grandpa was a big big influence in not making men a negative experience for us.

the recent shift of the last 4-5 years has been worrying. I used to liked jkr and could emphasize where she was coming from originally. but it was scary to see the gradual descent into where she is now and the stuff she is saying. Bc she is so far removed from what she originally stood for. It can happen to anyone, I even get worried if I’m on that slope sometimes. This whole situation had me second guessing myself bc I gave gnf time and believed in him. I had a moment when a few female creators made remarks (not from mc community) and I checked myself bc I was scared I was falling into the conservative rhetoric to blame women and protect men. Then I saw others who had more information and actually looked into it and also found this blog where the nuances were being discussed and let out a breath of relief that I was just using my critical thinking skills lmao

There are so many men out there who just aren’t given a chance bc society is set up for them to fall into a certain role. And I think a lot of men are trying to break that role and stereotypes. I became a dream fan bc I saw him doing this, saw a gamerboy in 2020 who was passionate and excelled at the game but didn’t fall into the toxicity of the space, actively fought against it.

and women should not be encouraged to drag men through hell bc they feel empowered by the rhetoric of recent years. women can and are just as selfish and shitty people as men. Sometimes they are worse

we’ve gone so far off center, we’ve essentially gone from one extreme to another. Which I learned two years ago was called terfs 😂 the movement needs to go back to its previous meaning. Feminism is not solely female empowerment it is the deconstructing of the patriarchal roles and belief that push men and women into boxes. Feminism, as I was taught over a decade ago, was the fight for women and MEN to be equal and have the same rights and opportunities. We can uplift women without putting down men. if this feminist movement doesn’t correct itself, it will allow more men like andrew tate to grow and influence young men.

The lack of female representation in the sphere cannot be corrected by women. It just can’t. Men need to be part of the change bc if the environment is not corrected, women cannot succeed and thrive. They can become successful but the hate and obstacles directed towards them is crazy. This is in general not just for streaming.

It can’t just be women solidarity, men need to learn and actively engage in calling out misogynist behavior. Women need to talk with their males friends and call them out when they say or act in disgusting ways. Women need to hold women accountable as well! It is unfair and unattainable to put female equality solely in the hands of women. We need to All work together.

Puffy is so good at this when she streams, especially on the smp. Hell, she even created a whole villain arc to call out the people telling her to “be a therapist to Tommy, omg your like dreams mom”. Puffy is awesome 🥹

men =/ bad

women =/ good

PREACH ANON

this breaks it all down so well and i really sympathize with you about having a poor view of some men in your life and trying to not let that influence your views but also not go so far off the other end that you end up blindly defending them without critical thinking.

Really important discussions and introspection about how your thought processes work that I think everyone should have at least once when situations like this come up

[horizon-verizon]

People feel bad for Alicent because she is pitiful. But she isn’t pitiful because she is a woman. It is because she is stupid and doesn’t have the will to stand up for herself. Unsurprisingly, I find her to be the most confident when fighting against other women.

As a woman, I find the stripping away of agency of the women to be very condescending. It’s like women aren’t allowed to have ambitions or put themselves first. Like ambition or putting yourself first is even a bad thing. The part where Rhaenyra even considers Otto’s peace terms (which include taking Aegon and Viserys as hostages) because he gave her the torn up page that Alicent kept (the same Alicent who stole her throne and tried to main Lucerys) was wild.

As for Alicent, I hate how some people treat her like a sad pet. They really have exaggerated the extent of Alicent’s submission as something she can’t avoid rather than her active choice.

She doesn’t stand up because she does not want to or lacks the courage to. Not because she is powerless. She lacks self respect and lacks courage. These are just her character traits. For every Alicent, you have a Rhaena or Alysanne. Women born even before her who aren’t afraid to stand up, instead of stepping aside for men. Yes they had their barriers too but they put up a fight when they could.

They really have exaggerated the extent of Alicent’s submission as something she can’t avoid rather than her active choice.

Somehow, we've convinced ourselves that if a (certain) woman is a victim of patriarchal abuse, she has no independent will anymore of her own. At the same time, others of us have convinced ourselves that women like Mormon wives aren't mentally and emotionally compelled to act against their own and other women's best interests.

I think that we're in a weird understanding of human will and choice when it comes to women, bc for centuries women have both been naturalized as "needing" protection (and tied up with that, direction) from men, as well as compelled to configure themselves as mentally feebler for men to want to "protect" and be invested in their wellbeing. People want a "short" and "easy" solution to come from women themselves instead of thinking about social patterns of victimization (for white women).

It's like a woman cannot be defiant and still be a victim or vulnerable; and she has to be set against over and over without trying to push back for her to "earn" sympathy, thus the assignment of victimhood that will give her the little social graces certain women can get. There's this weird relationship with how a woman "earns" sympathy or how she loses it instead of more of a focus on how the abuse actor or systems push them into corners, which happens for both Alicent and Rhaenyra and most women to different degrees.

But with Alicent, there simply was more evidence that her kids were never in real danger before the Driftmark incident (and there still wasn't afterwards, but w/the Driftmark episode it's pretty clear Alicent ramped up her preparing her kids and supporters to work/think against Rhaenyra, which set up the necessity for a later "purge" or non-lethal put down) than otherwise. Book and show-wise. show wise, we also see more evidence of Alicent choosing to see Rhaenyra as the enemy bc she was also very jealous of what she perceived to be an infallible privileged protection from conscriptive "obedience". It is not her fault her father, having way more power and means to sustain himself and her own sustenance/reputation, forced her to "entice" Viserys, to marry him, insist that if she didn't believe in his ways of "protecting" her that she was unworthy of his protection and graces. But she also willed herself into believing Rhaenyra was the culprit of her own miseries bc she didn't feel like she could risk Otto or Viserys' "abandonment".

[purple-petrichor]

Asexual Gero Masterpost

Okay so hear me out. I love this series and all of the wacky moments and fun characters within it. And the story of someone trying to find a partner even though they struggle is so, so, so good. And just like many fans, I’m super curious to see how the story will develop, and who Gero will end up with (if anyone). 

But there’s a big point that I’m not sure even the authors are aware of:  Gero is Asexual.

–Evidence below–

The base definition of Asexuality is when a person experiences little to no sexual attraction. This means that even if a person has libido, fantasies, and positive views on intimate relationships, their natural orientation is little to no sexual attraction to any gender. They may be capable of finding people romantically attractive, and may even desire partnership, however, the mechanisms for finding other people “hot” and experiencing desire for them based off of looks and sexual signals simply aren't there. However, due to how strongly society pushes the idea of instant attraction, and the heteronormative world we all live in, this can be extremely difficult to recognize within oneself. Many asexuals say they didn’t realize their orientation for many years because it wasn’t even known as a possible option. 

In line with this, here are many common Asexual traits and experiences that can be seen with Gero:

>>comfort with singleness

In the very first chapter, during a conversation with Bug User, Gero states that he’s not really interested in marriage or partnerships. Despite everyone around him naturally pursuing intimacy (his sister with her girlfriend, Bug User with his fiancee), Gero just…doesn’t. His natural conception of self is to be single. He even states that this is a comfortable thought for him, being ‘easier’. It’s possible the manga seems to imply that we should view this as ‘giving up’, but Gero doesn’t seem otherwise depressed or discouraged in his daily life aside from his job. The idea of being unpartnered isn’t one that feels ‘unfulfilling’ for him. It’s only when Gero is given no choice that he makes the decision to actively seek out a partner.

Of course there are many asexuals who do want romantic relationships, and strongly desire companionship, which is why...

>>basing relationships more on emotional bond and other factors than physical attraction

This emotional outburst is heartbreaking. It’s also very similar to how asexual people tend to talk.

All of these things, all of these ‘desires’ from Gero, all of what he values… are emotional. Not physical. There’s no depiction of sensual actions, not even hugging or kissing. Hell, they’re not even touching in bed! Gero’s face in the imagined scene looks confused, surprised that he’s even there to begin with, rather than the happiness of someone who’s next to their object of desire. 

His natural ‘fantasy’ (if you could call it that) has some random woman essentially act as a placeholder. She doesn’t even have eyes! This is consistent with the fact that many aspec people report finding it difficult to fantasize about people, and if they do, it may occur as vague nebulous scenes, disembodied body parts, or faceless people. A ‘faceless stand-in’ is exactly what Gero is picturing here.

Everything Gero talks about could be provided by a close friend or queer-platonic-partner, not explicitly romantic or sexual in nature. He just wants companionship. He wants someone to care about him. And his way of picturing that doesn’t involve sexual or sensual affection as a base.

>>turning down opportunities

Here we see Gero literally pushing women off of him. Even when someone is offering sex, it appears to have no interest or temptation. There’s no blush on his cheeks. No sense of ‘that’s appealing but not right now’. Instead, his reaction is a brusque and clear refusal. He’s portrayed as somewhat flustered, and is even so upset that after this he immediately walks right into a glass wall. A professional hitman, not noticing a pane of glass? It must have really thrown him off. 

Now, this refusal could be due to awkwardness, or a commitment to professionalism while on the job. Or, it could be that Gero is just truly not interested. And his flustered reaction comes from being forced into close proximity with something that deep down really isn’t comfortable for him.

>>not experiencing sexual attraction This is the big one! Let’s review that one accidental-grab moment:

I CANNOT GET OVER THIS PANEL IT LITERALLY SAYS “RELUCTANT”

HIT EM WITH THAT AGAIN GERO

RELUCTANT

ACCIDENT

NO BIG DEAL

Are those the words of a man who secretly wants to be physical with women?

The world instructs men to brag about and exaggerate their sexual interactions with women. Why? For the sake of ‘cool’ points: to be seen as popular, desirable, masculine. And yet, when Gero touches a woman here, instead of getting an ego-boost, his immediate instinct is to *minimize what’s happening*. All of his thoughts are about how uncomfortable he is, and trying to escape the significance of the situation. Downplay (it’s just the back of my hand), distance (A total accident, no big deal). The word that stands out here is UNWILLING. There’s not any psychological reward in this. Only psychological stress.

And sure, you could make the argument that he’s just inexperienced and self-conscious, but still. This…isn’t the reaction of someone who ‘could’ enjoy it in another circumstance. This is the inner dialogue of a person who is hyper-aware of what the world would say about this situation, and about him, and is immediately turned off, nervous, self-conscious, and negative towards that idea. This lack of reaction from Gero is further highlighted here:

Bro that’s not arousal, that’s awkwardness. He literally turns away a woman flirting and directs her towards another man instead. This isn’t inexperienced fumbling. This is feeling cornered and turning to panic. You don't exactly get any sense that Gero’s enjoying the pictures. Not even a passing comment like ‘nice’ or something.

For asexual people, there can be this weird ‘layered’ viewing of the world sometimes. You’re aware of what narratives the world has, how things work. You know what situations, phrases, and body parts tend to get strong reactions from people. You become hyper-aware of how you’re expected to act, and what actions you’re expected to enjoy, as a person of your assigned gender. Not to mention how certain actions around sex will raise or lower your status in the eyes of others.

And yet, when you realize more and more that your internal reactions are…not according to those pre-established lines….you can get really flustered and nervous. It’s not appreciation that Gero demonstrates here. This is pressure and embarrassment.

He follows the accidental-touch by asking Kinosaki what to do, because maybe he genuinely doesn’t have any internal desire about what to do next. So he defaults to someone with stronger instincts. Just as he ends up doing a second time with the swimsuit pics.

>>feeling like you’re ’broken’ or different from other people

Gero repeatedly seems to set himself aside from ‘normal people’. In his case, his excuse is that he’s ‘too damaged’, traumatized and manipulated since childhood to kill others and view the world through a rotten lens. And while that may be true (and questions about trauma or past experiences are sometimes relevant to asexuals in real life!), that’s hardly enough. Gero feels different, ‘seperate’ from others. “What makes you think I can”? I “could never do that”? There’s some kind of baseline rift that Gero feels; something related to him processing love and partnership differently than the norm. (And sure, within the series’ universe, this is done under the excuse of his hitman-upbringing. But did Gero “avoid love and women”, or was the draw never quite big enough to go after? )

(Side note: technically this has notes of being Aromantic, not Asexual. But in a society which pushes the narrative that both those attractions are the same thing, it’s easy to mistake lack of urge towards one with lack of interest in all. Or, like Gero, you may come to believe you aren’t good at relationships as a whole.)

>>not picking up on signals from others

Yup, Arashiyama was not shy about her feelings for Gero. And she was obviously designed to have looks that strike the audience as “sexy”. So it was a very interesting point of the series when neither her body nor her clothing were commented on in any way. Most notably, they didn’t seem to have any effect on Gero at all. 

Look at that reaction panel: Truly he doesn’t care. We don’t see a ‘blushing but hold it down and ignore it’ reaction; he’s not drawn with any blush at all. Gero is not portrayed as holding anything back around Arashiyama. He just truly doesn't feel any reaction to her signals.

In addition, this:

OH THE GLASSES

OH ITS THE GLASSES YOU’RE MAD ABOUT

SO HE DID HAVE A POINT OF VIEW THAT INCLUDED ALL THIS

SO HE DID SEE THAT 

BUT GERO DOESN’T REACT AT ALL

DOESN’T EVEN BRING IT UP

Honestly I don’t believe women and female bodies have any natural effect on Gero at all at this point, haha, he might be black stripe. That’s the thing about asexuals–we’re not stupid or unable to understand common flirting methods. They just doesn't usually trigger much of a reaction.

>>being confused or out of place in the world

As early as chapter 1, we watch Gero staring at Kinosaki while walking down the street, as they kiss and seduce another man.

One of the most common asexual experiences is a sense of wondering why people act the way they do. Why do people make such silly decisions? Why are they all so intense about sex? What is this hivemind they all share? Many asexuals report believing that people were “faking it” for most of their lives. Either they were broken, or the asexual person had to be. 

This stare from Gero, enough to walk into a wall and break his glasses with the force of it, seems to me like that kind of asexual fascination. A kind of non-understanding, a kind of calculated curiosity about the world. What are they doing? I mean he knows what, but why? Why doesn’t he feel that way- (SMACK)

>>genuinely believing it’s not that important to people

In early chapters, Gero doesn’t seem to grant coupling the same sort of ‘weight’ that others do. He seems to have no instinctual discomfort with ‘missing out’ on common life markers. As shown here, he acknowledges and honors his sister’s relationship. But for himself, he views being single without children as an equally legitimate path in life. Even his younger sister picks up on the unspoken demand–that the family expects them to have children, once they reach marriageable age. But Gero just…doesn’t. Or doesn’t take the possibility seriously. He really seems to assume the world will just relax and accept him being unpartnered. His entire bloodline will die out. And that’s fine, right? After all, it's not like reproducing and seeking intimacy are deep-seated desires in most peoples’ basic instincts, right?

I mean come on. This is basically a common ace joke.

>>assuming you do feel attraction because XYZ

In the absence of strong attraction, it is very common to mistake other feelings in its place. For example, many asexuals spend years assuming they do have sexual feelings for people, when in actuality it was factors such as aesthetic attraction (admiring a person’s looks) or romantic attraction (feeling romantically drawn to a person) all along. People have also reported ‘overanalysis’ of their own reactions–this person is kind to me, and they look nice, and I care about them, so that means I’m madly attracted to them, right?

Here we see Gero fall into the same trap of overanalysis. He felt a rapid heartbeat, and some physical reaction, that must mean this is love, right? Throughout the entire series, Gero seems to be assuming he’s straight because, after all, he gets nervous around women. 

Of course you get nervous, you’re new to social situations, bro. Of course you get nervous, she’s placing expectations on you and you desperately want to meet them. Of course you get nervous, this is a lot of emotion suddenly thrown at you. Of course you get nervous, you’ve been put under pressure to view all women as potential wife material. But is this good-arousal nervousness, or negative-stress-response nervousness? Signs point to the latter.

>>proximity to queerness

This is a more subtle point, but important nonetheless. 

We know that Gero appears supportive of queerness in general. He has a sister who is wlw, and actively supports their relationship. Furthermore, he shows no hate towards Kinosaki for his gender and gender expression, after an initial adjustment period.

It is very common for ace-spec people to feel vaguely aligned with LGBT+ issues, even if they don’t feel like they have “enough” solid evidence to identify as queer themselves. Often ace people report assuming that they were simply a highly-invested supportive ally. It’s possible that Gero is in the same situation–comfortable with queerness, accepting of different ways of life, but because of marginal interest in women and needing to find a partner, he doesn’t recognize the ways in which he himself stands markedly outside the straight norm.

>>But most importantly this date:

DEMI???

DEMI???

MY BOY YOU ARE DEMI!!!

Demisexual. A subset of asexuality. A sexual orientation in which a person cannot feel sexual attraction to others unless a strong emotional bond is formed. Forming an emotional bond is not a guarantee of attraction developing, however, it is necessary for the person to even begin to feel sexual interest in the first place.

This is…I’m still stunned by this scene. Honestly this is the most direct example of a demisexual/demiromantic male character that I’ve ever witnessed, and it may not have even been intentional. I probably couldn’t write something this direct or skilled about it, and I’m close to demi myself!! It’s truly astounding. I remember reading this chapter the first time and my jaw dropped, totally stunned, in recognition. This is how I think. This is how my mind tends to naturally think about relationships. This is almost on-the-nose textbook demisexuality. 

Gero you are demi!! Please realize!!

– – – – – 

So yeah this is what I think. Given all the evidence at hand, and how consistently Gero has been portrayed so far, his actions and tendencies would match being on the asexual spectrum. If it were canon, that would be incredible–these moments alone would make him one of the most stunning examples of a male asexual character in manga, hell, in all of fiction today.

Given the strong similarities, I wonder if the author/artist are possibly aware of this. They do have queer characters in terms of Gero’s sister (and arguably Kinosaki). So there’s a chance they may have heard of asexuality or aromanticism as well. …But also the chances seem low. A mainstream shonen publication? How much more queer content can they push. A battle manga based around romance? Wouldn't help much to make your main character incapable of certain kinds of attraction. And yet…god I wish. The more time goes on and the more chapters stay within these bounds, I keep wondering if there could be a chance.

Anyway each chapter that we’ve seen so far has only reinforced and continued these traits, so. <3 Asexual Gero is canon to me now thanks y’all can jump onboard!

[chevelleneech]

Many, MANY reactors are cis-het men, with a large side serving of homophobia. Yes, even the ones who pretend they aren’t, but will then go « they seem like good friends » when Jimin and Jungkook act like no *friends* would ever do.

There really isn’t more to it than this. And no, I’m not giving them the benefit of the doubt, because in my 7 years with BTS, I can count on one finger the male reactor who watched GFC in Saipan and thought it was gay, and it’s an openly gay reactor (GCF in Saipan is my chosen homophobia test :p). Queer knows queer.

So yeah. Ramping homophobia everywhere mostly.

I don’t think it’s about giving the benefit of the doubt, more so than calling it what it actually more likely is. I haven’t seen anything from The Amp Theory in this instance, to assume they’re homophobic. That doesn’t mean they aren’t, but calling them such would be a wrong accusation based on nothing, as far as I know. I would say they’re men who observe the world through a heteronormative view point.

Yes, heteronormativity is rooted in homophobia, but that doesn’t mean everyone who hasn’t yet denounced their biased ideals are actively homophobic.

Aside from being specific about them though, I do agree for the most part. People do tend to push back about Jikook in ways that are homophobic, because they are scared of losing viewership (usually queer reactors hit this one I’ve noticed) or they flat out won’t like the members anymore (usually straight men hit this one). It’s ass, especially because as I said, the lyrics and actions and words be right there to look at, and still people won’t do it, even though they’ll big up any moment the members have with women.

RM literally raps near identical lyrics about women and men being “riders”, and the number of people who skip over it, laugh it off, or claim he must be talking about himself, is ridiculous.

[foreverforgally]

In The Garden

A Gally Fanfic; Chapter 3

The Tension

Summary - Quinn Abigail Allen is the first female ever to grace the presence of the Glade. At first the tensions between her and keeper Gally are high, the enemies to lovers trope creeps through her life. Will she give into the trope? Or will she chose the love triangle?

Warnings - Maybe smut in different chapters or hints of sexual activity. Fluff! Angst! I am definitely not a good writer!

The next morning I woke up in my hammock, head pounding from the night before. “Rise and shine cupcake, it’s time to start our day.” Newt passed through the hammocks, chipper as ever this morning.

“Leave me alone please, I still need brain cells to understand your illiteracy.” Groaning I put my arm over my eyes and rolled to my stomach.

“C’mon Quinn you’re starting in Building today, and Gally’s a sucker for good attendance.” I could hear his footsteps walk around my hammock, fixing and tying loose ends here and there.

“Well you can tell that shank beauty rest is important.” I muttered, “heavens knows he needs it.” I snuggled back into my warm blankets.

“What did you say about me?” Suddenly my warm blanket was ripped from my body and I was rolled onto the ground. I landed on the dirt with an umph.

“Aren’t you just a sweetheart” I mumbled, rubbing the dirt off my scuffed hands that i landed on to catch my fall.

“Get up my lady, Gally waits for no one.” He scoffed out, his way of speaking makes me dumber and dumber by the second.

“First of all, don’t call me that. Second of all, did you just speak in what, the third person?” I glanced up at him, my face contorting in disgust at his presence.

“Whatever, let’s go hurry up.” Newt waved at me in condolences as Gally dragged me away. He grabbed me by my arm and walked fastly back to his post as keeper. Along the way I almost trip a couple of times, his legs were so much longer than mine and he towered me a good foot or so.

“So greenie, what we do as builders is we gather supplies and we build off of those supplies,” He directed me towards the different stations, showing me how everything worked.

“Haven’t we already established that I have a name?” I huffed out, I’m not a greenie anymore, I’m Quinn. One thing Ive learned about Gally, was his need to always be stubborn.

“Sorry my lady, shalt I fetch thy some refreshments.” He spat as he curtsied teasingly, what a dick. I pushed him down to his ass and stood over him.

“Earth is full, go home freak.” I spat directly at his left eye. He groaned and cussed, he grabbed my ankle and pulled me down. At this point, we were causing a scene and other people started to pay attention.

“You’re the freak, what’re you even doing here? this is a maze full of boys, you don’t belong here.” He said accusingly, he had a point but he needed to stop being such a dick. I didn’t ask to be here.. I don’t think?

“Hey! Break it up you two,” Alby came running over. “Whatever tension you both have needs to be set aside, you’re both,” he emphasized, “Acting like shanks.” he stared at us both.

“Well?”He asserted. Sighing in frustration, Gally and I held our hands out to shake. My heart jump a notch when his came into contact with mine, his hand was rough and callused from building for so many years.

The contact between lasted a second or two longer than needed, the action going unnoticed, hopefully. “Good, now get back to work everyone. Nothing to see here.” Alby dismissed everyone and back to work we went.

“So, what’re we working on today?” I questioned, seemed like there was a big project going on from how particular Gally was when he yelled at the builders.

“Well Quinn, we’re building you your own special room in homestead.” He was annoyed, why would he be annoyed?

“I don’t need my own room, i’ve got my hammock, real cozy.” I danced on my feet, swinging back and forth. I felt embarrassed that they were making me my own area.

“Alby’s orders, said a lady shouldn’t sleep with a bunch of hormonal boys that haven’t seen a women in their lifetime.” He bickered with me on my own area. If it was from Alby, I guess I had no say. I should have one though. I nodded along in acknowledgment.

Wordlessly, he picked up an axe and handed a smaller one to me. My eyes grew a bit in confusion and I grabbed the axe, and followed him in silence as he led me to wherever.

“This, is the deadheads. It’s where we bury dead Gladers and get our wood from.” He mumbled out as we walked over to a tree and started to chop away.

“Should I uh.. Should I cut too or?..” I stuttered confused at what I should be doing. Annoyed, he looked up at me like I was dumb and continued.

I scoffed in disbelief again, “Alright dude, what is your problem with me?” I slammed my axe into a tree stub. His grasp on his axe tightened and I could see his back tense. He stood in silence for a few moments.

Out of no where, he dropped his axe and stomped towards me, and backed me into a tree. Gally punched the open tree space by my head and got close to my face, glaring into my eyes.

“I know you, I don’t know how I know you but I do and I can’t get you out of my head” He said this so softly but venomously.

“You,” He grabbed my hand and placed it on his chest, “Do things to me that I don’t like.” His heart was racing, I felt so out of place and confused that mine started racing faster than usual.

There was no other statements, my breathing grew shallow and I traced my eyes to look at both of his. Out of my mind, I let my gaze drop down to his lips.

The only thing you could hear were the chirps of birds in the trees and the shallowness of our breathing, I could feel his on my nose.

Slowly, I let myself get closer to him, lifting my back off of the tree and placing my hand softly on his cheek.

“What are you doing.” He sounded scared, but he never moved or turned away from me. His face grew softer and red, his freckles darkening from the hue.

I closed my eyes and leaned in, our foreheads making contact. “Now what do we have here?” Newt’s voice was so loud, we immediately jumped away from one another.

“Uh I was just,” Gally paused pointing at the axes, “He was teaching me how to chop the wood.” I nervously played with the small twine of string I had wrapped around my finger.

“Ah yes, morning wood.” Newt smirked at his joke, Gally muttered frustratingly and walked off in a heat. He left me to deal with Newt, typical.

I coughed off the energy, “I should.. finish getting this wood.” I turned around and started awkwardly looking at the trees and picked up my axe.

“Oh, so that wasn’t a metaphor for something else? Could’ve fooled me Quinny.” He was relentless, Newt seemingly wasn’t going to drop the topic anytime soon.

“It wasn’t anything Newt.” please please please drop it, this had to be one of the most embarrassing things i’ve ever been caught for.

“Don’t think I didn’t catch how long that handshake was either, and the suffocating tension the two of you had at the bonfire.” He started to walk around, picking up this and that as I chopped my wood.

“Ok and so what? I’ve been here for two days it meant nothing.” I brushed him off, gathering my wood and starting to head back to the Builders.

“Oh come on Quinn, You have to be blind if you don’t notice that he’s into you.” He jogged up by my side and I was coming to the conclusion that he wasn’t going to let it go.

Heat rushed up from my neck to my face, he wasn’t into me, that’s just ridiculous. “Whatever Newt, He’s Gally,” I said in distaste, “and I’m.. well I’m me.” I shrugged and dropped the wood by Homestead.

The sun was blazing and my tight ripped pants were making me sweat. “Newt, get back to your station.” Alby yelled at him from across the field, my savior.

“This conversation isn’t over Quinny,” He emphasized, “I mean it” He said, jogging backwards until he turned around and picked up his pace.

“I’d rather be caught dead” I muttered, taking a rubber band and putting my long hair into a ponytail. At some point in the day, I can’t tell time, my room in homestead had been built.

We built dressers, light jars, and different things I didn’t know was possible. The last thing was the bed frame, and my mattress was no tempur-pedic. The mattress was made from various feathers, grass, cottons, etc.

The bed frame only need two people to build it, so Gally dismissed the rest of the Builders to go work on other projects. It gave us the room, it left us alone.

“Hand me the plank please.” Gally asked softly, his demeanor was still rough but he was different. “Sure.” I huffed, neither of us made eye contact as I handed him the wood but our hands would briefly touch in the process.

“This silence is killing me, you know that right.” I leaned onto one of my dressers, watching his back muscles move and stop when I spoke up.

He turned around and faced me, I forced the eye contact. “I don’t know what you mean.” He ignored my under line question, picked a tool up and continued.

Sighing, I scoffed to the side and lined the inside of my cheek with my tongue. I picked up a tool too and walked over to help. I stood right next him, my leg rubbing against his.

“What’re you doing.” He stopped and asked me again, he loves to ask me that doesn’t he. I feigned innocence, “I’m helping you, that’s my job isn’t it?” I questioned through my eyelashes.

“I’d be damned if you ever made it as a builder.” He scoffed, continuing his work and keeping the contact we had on our legs.

“Ah but you would like that wouldn’t you? me and all my distractions?” I said seductively, my only intention was to tease but it seemed like i got under some skin.

“Jesus Quinn, would you give it a rest.” He called me by my name, not only that but he was fidgety, his adams apple bobbing and his tone was shaky. Gally was nervous.

I giggled, giggled “Stop slacking off and help make my bed.” I teased him, picking up the other end of the heavy post with ease. He was shocked at my apparent muscle mass and came over to carry the other side of the post.

“Please it down over here.” He quided me over to where the rest of the bed was, the soft light from the light jars made him look soft, his freckles softer on his face.

“You have a nice face.” I casually stated, looking down to pick up a tool. Crash, he dropped his s’aide of the post.

“Can you mess off greenie, l'm trying to do my work.” He was upset but that didn't stop his face from reddening and it definitely didn’t stop my grin from forming.

"I'm trying to do my work too; you should really stop distracting me." I bantered with him, the look on his face making me enjoy being a Builder

He grabbed my chin and backed me into my dresser. "I've had enough Quinn, you need to knock it off.” He professed. It was such a shame the both of us were so stubborn.

“And if I don't?” I asked softly, whispering in his face. His eyes glased over; he gave that look again. His eyes repeatedly traced from my lips back to my eyes. Is demeaner was strong but his silence asked me a burning question.

"It's okay.* I said, catching on to his question on whether or not I wanted this. And like in the Deadheads, we got closer, forehead to forehead, shallow bresthing to shallow breathing.

His hand moved from my jaw to the back of my neck and his other hand cupped my waist. It was happening

“Ok we really need a system.” Newt had caught us again.

"Jesus Newt, can’t you learn how to knock?" He leaned against the door frame. Just like last time, me and Gally flew apart, the awkward energy taking its toll again.

"Well love, it's not like you have a door yet innit?" Newt smirked from his position, he was having so much fun being a total cock block

"You're uh bedroom is done" Gally growled awkwardly, clearly feeling the same about Newt in this moment that I had. "Right right. I'I see you later?" I asked him, hinting something deeper in my words.

"Uh yeah maybe" He nodded towards me, his lips clenched together in a long line. "Newt” he acknowledge as he walked out. Newt nodded and winked in his direction.

"I really hate you, you know that right." I flopped down onto my new bed. The mattress wasnt as bad as I had previously thought it would have been. "C'mon Quinny, you could never hate me, you need me." He flopped onto my bed aswell laying next to me as we turned to look at eachother.

"Good night Newt." I protested, Exhausted from working so hard and going through Gally’s mood swings. "Night shuck" He patted my head, Pulling a couple of blankets he brought with him over me.

"Put that door on the hinges on your way out please." I mumbled out in a hurry, I didn’t want to be watched as I slept.

He chuckled before walking out.

[f1ghtsoftly]

So I think like an issue right now that I’ve been having is dialoguing with women whose primary idea of “tras” are the people harassing her vs. women who interact with primarily trans identified females-who usually aren’t the ringleaders around harassment campaigns against feminists. I find we end up talking past each other.

And I think this underscores an important point about refusing to compromise on our terminology and on a class analysis of patriarchy. The problem isn’t trans people on the whole/ the problem is men.

I might not agree with the worldview of many trans identified women but I still acknowledge that they are not the generators of this mess. I think it’s absolutely critical that we as a movement focus less on demonizing “trans people” and more on the problem-which is men. It is men on the right, It is men on the left, it is men on the political fringes. It is “apolitical” men, it is centrist men, it’s libertarians. If the trans movement was led and centered female people-it led with a worldview consistent with the female position in our social hierarchy and likely naturally adopt some feminist values as women continued to act in their own self interest. Many trans identified women already have some form of feminist consciousness, but have been deliberately confused, attacked and shamed into trans identification. This is why it is to important for these men to push feminists out of the public sphere, they’re afraid all these women they’ve tricked and scared into supporting them will hear us and listen.

So anyways, I think when women talk about “tras” it would be cool to consider calling them men or male led attacks against feminists if that’s true. I get sometimes females participate and can be just as cruel, I wouldn’t ask you to lie, but it would be nice to make an effort to demonstrate the difference in violence and harassment based on sex within our own language and it’s good for recruitment. Trans identified women and trans friendly LGBT women are some of the women most likely to become radical feminists, they’re politically engaged, they see the reality of this movement up close and they are often also bearing the brunt of social punishment for being gender non conforming-but without the fanfare. I think it’s a waste to be hostile unless they’re acting in ways that merit it.

But truthfully, we need to start acting like every woman is a potential feminist because liberation from patriarchy is in all of our self interest and much like what we’ve seen from the current wave of activism around Palestine, there is a great deal of safety in numbers-it’s best to build them up as best we can.

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

it’s genuinely so fucking gross to see people fucking celebrating the shit that came out about dream like??? hello that’s teenage girls that got exploited? why r you happy about it. there’s victims and it’s fucking gross to use them as an excuse to celebrate considering the very real harm that happened to them? don’t pretend you support them when all you talk about is how superior you were bc you knew dream was a creep like, if you had evidence you should have fucking shared it. ESPECIALLY considering his fanbase has made a concerted effort in concealing the true details of his worst actions and the constant made up shit about him doing bad shit he didn’t actually do despite him doing plenty of bad shit making it fucking IMPOSSIBLE for anyone not doing actual research to Actually Know what was real or fake claims, which has only JUST started to clear up.

and, like, a lot of it has this vibe that they feel like they’re Smarter than the victims bc they never trusted him, when the victims did. there’s a lot of barely concealed victim blaming and it’s so gross. like, it’s actually pretty weird to do a full on background check of every random gaming youtuber you come across and again it’s really fucking difficult with dream bc there’s so much misinfo out there that his actual fucked up shit got buried under complete non issues- often intentionally by his fans or himself because he’s a manipulative piece of shit! and people being manipulated aren’t stupid or bad people for being victims but there’s always this underlying air of smug superiority and it’s sickening. you’re not better than people who just wanted to watch minecraft videos and believed his lies about trying to become a better person and who got exploited as a result.

and this isn’t to say dream stans arent fucking gross either. they accused one of the women (actually a woman in this case thank the fucking lord though it’s still creepy and exploitative) who was a fan of his he exploited for nudes of sexually harassing him for sending unsolicited nudes when they were solicited, or making fun of her for being “upset she was ghosted” which like… one, she wasn’t, and two, someone with a massive platform talking up their fans until they get sexual content of them and then dipping is actually really weird and not equivalent to like a rando you meet on a dating app ghosting you. this isn’t to defend dream- he’s a racist creep who’s not only flirted with minors and potentially groomed them (he Absolutely exploited them, but grooming is slightly more specific- but if all the claims are true (and the other claims seemingly being proven make it Not look good) he absolutely did) manipulated them into trusting him and thinking he was safe through playing the role of an accepting, loving pillar of the community.

but acting all holier than thou because you thought someone was cringe and taking it out on teenage fans, including potential victims, who most likely didn’t know about the weird shit that dream had done in the past or had such biased sources for it that they didn’t realise how bad it was, is just cruel. you’re not helping anyone by doing that. celebrating the very real suffering of these girls, who loved and trusted dream and had that taken advantage of, is vile. you should not feel validated that they were hurt- you should be horrified and sympathetic. the victims are human beings, not gotchas. and acting so vile only gives the fucking creeps defending dream more ammo, and who do you think sixteen year olds are gonna trust? someone telling them to kill themselves because they like a youtuber or the youtuber they take comfort in and don’t have the life experience to not trust yet? it’s so performative and pushed people deeper into spaces that, and i cannot stress this enough, centre around a very real threat to minors who’s still actively dming and snapchatting with his underaged fans to this day. don’t be the one to drive them deeper into that dangerous nest.

[amaria-the-soup]

This ask is made in good faith, I need to emphasize that because many people are extremely hostile about it.

“Your thoughts become your actions”

You said this in reply to someone, and I have such genuine concern for you if you have such little self control and lack of authority over yourself that all of your thoughts become actions. Like- I fear for every person you interact with on a day to day basis and I’m sorry for how lonely you must be living like that. /gen

That being said your experience is not universal, the vast majority of people can parse what should happen irl vs what should stay in fiction, that’s why goreporn horror and gratuitously violent action movies are so popular and rape kink is the most common kink among women. It’s fiction.

Expecting and encouraging people to be ashamed of themselves for the fiction they consume is just repackaged purity culture and the right reactionary thinking that continues to plague the world and is the root of all systemic issues.

Ultimately, that shame that you’re trying to push will only backfire. Because kink very often has roots in trauma and, in general, absuers aren’t the ones reading fanfic on the internet. They in the world, abusing people. So by trying to shame consumers of immoral fiction you’re only harming victims and innocents.

Especially because (and this is not an accusation because I realize it can read like one) shame is very often used by abusers to manipulate their victims. “Well you *like* what I’m doing, so you’re disgusting and if you leave I’ll tell everyone.” Whether the victim does or does not like it is irrelevant, the threat is real and shame is what makes it real.

By encouraging shame you’re only enabling actual irl abusers. You’re enthusiastically giving them the means to further trap their victims.

If you’re really, genuinely worried, look into how you can help the victims irl. There might be nothing you can do, and that’s fine. But vauge posting on the internet does nothing but harm.

I really hope you have a good day, and once again this ask is in good faith and I’m willing to have a conversation with you as two mature adults. If you don’t want to reply publicly you’re welcome to dm me. /gen

I understand what you’re saying but I sincerely hope you do realize that any thought is an option to an action. God said “what man thinks man shall do.” I do my best to keep myself in check. Thanks for the concern, but I’m just fine.

However, I am not talking about rape kink or violence. I believe that I have stated that I like those things too. It’s just part of my nature. I don’t want those things to happen to me, I know it’s bad, but the thought can be exciting. That’s not what I’m talking about.

I’m talking about incest. The act of sex with another family member. I am talking about the act of being with someone who you know and who you are supposed to love and support but never romantically. People who encourage, support, ask about, or write about these acts are disgusting and vile. They take the time to actively engage in the thoughts of having sex with a daughter, a son, or siblings. Even grandparents or aunts and uncles.

These thoughts are vile and disgusting. I genuinely had to take over twelve hours after receiving this ask to respond to it. Because to me, it sounds like you are actively seeking to defend the people who would put their hands on someone they have witnessed grow up and know about.

This is not about the issue of rape kink. Blood play. Bondage. This is not the same thing as someone who has actually been through trauma. This is about a grown person using their power over their siblings and their children to have body gratification.

I’m sorry if that confused you. I’m sorry if you feel like I have attacked you in some way. But I am NOT discussing anything about kinks. I am discussing incest.

[asterias-corner]

it’s Wednesday! You know what that means? Ranting about the Mormon church <3 (i have mutual at 7 and idefk what we’re doing)

Was on the ‘ex Mormon’ tag, and i reminded myself of the whole “strength of the youth” program they had with us that one Sunday, here are some of the rules that are official that i had distaste reading and hearing my peers agree with.

(Sorry if it’s hard to read)

They had one on abortion, but i couldn’t find it- all i know is that they were saying it was against god’s commandments or some stupid shi

——-

general conference this year was annoying as all hell, i don’t remember (nor care) who had talked about being celestial, but he kept fucking saying “celestial” and every time i tuned in, I’d hear him say celestial and i was so ready to drive to the fucking conference center and cut the microphone off. Then the next week, of course they have to do the whole after conference lessons, and i found out they had 5 sessions in total?! They always have one for the women, and i hate it.

———-

Mormon girls are assholes and you cannot change my mind. I’m lucky enough to feel pretty confident in my body, despite having self harm scars- and not fitting their standards of an ideal body type. So whenever these fuckers look at me weird, specifically my scars, i want to scream. Also, there are two girls in the group above me, and they both act hella gay with eachother and when called out or called queer, they start to get offended as if they weren’t just cuddling like a married couple two seconds earlier. Girls camp, my first year- they were literally spooning each other and nobody says jack fucking shit. But the second i DARE hold the hand of my friend who was having a panic attack, my mom gets informed and i get lectured. I’m pretty openly queer, so it’s only an issue because they know who I’m attracted too. Or they assume that, they think i like girls and I’m a lesbian, but I’m literally trans and gay, but like hell I’m going to come clean about that. The only reason i enjoy mutual sometimes, is because i like to sneak off and play piano.

————

i used to have a few friends, some girls my age. Then we got into young women’s instead of the activity days class and they all ditched me, well- one did, the others either moved wards or were the age group above me. But every time i open my mouth, I’m instantly treated lowly. I’ve spoken up about this too, to my parents but i can’t talk to them about anything. They protect the Mormon girls all the time, not once trying to understand why I’m upset. I also hate them because they like to judge me specifically, also these other girls who aren’t even fucking Mormon? But one of my leaders brings them to try and convert them into this hell of a cult, which isn’t working btw. But i used to be on the same bus as one of the girls, and she is super annoying, so is the other girl. They swear like a sailor, and i end up getting roped in with getting in trouble because of it. Also the fact i have to look after them and whenever i try and hangout with them, they push me off to the side and judge me.

——-

there’s still a whole truckload of things i didn’t unpack, but let’s save that for Sunday.

moral of the story? I fucking hate the Mormon church, and it shouldn’t exist. The sexism, blatant homophobia and transphobia is stupid as hell.

[asexual-means-no-attraction]

people aren’t saying you’re “the bad guy” for saying clothes aren’t gendered, and no one is saying you’re wrong there. you’re “the bad guy” for acting like all nonbinary people do is perpetuate sexism and hurt the trans community. for outright refusing to listen to nb people about their identities and experiences. for reblogging posts made by terfs. we aren’t the ones mistaken here, you are.

For the record. The post that that is in reference too I didn't mention nb people once. People came at me saying I was terrible for literally just saying "clothes aren't gendered." And then used nb as to why.

And as I've said before, I've been doing years of research and listening to as many nb people as I could before I came to the conclusions that I have. And the ONLY things I've said on the matter is how the nb community (and I've even mentioned binary trans people a few times) have hurt the trans (my) community when it comes to continuing to push sexist ideals but call it progressive. And how that's fucked up. Pretty sure I've mentioned once how I also contributed to that before I realized what I was doing.

I've even talked at length about how I actually like the idea of nb. My only issue is how the community goes about things. Cuz ya, someone telling a muscular or butch women she's actually nb is fucked up. Likewise to feminine men. And it happens all the time. Clothes are just one of the way that this toxic part of the community uses things to push sexism. And it's not wrong of me to talk about that.

Lastly. Again. This is Tumblr. It isn't that deep. This isn't activism. It's me just talking. As for the terf thing. I don't vet every single person I reblog from and it's entitled to expect everyone to do so. Nor am I so terrified of terfs that I feel the need to freak out if one ends up somewhere near me. Better to give them a chance to see my POV and maybe start a positive discussion, then come at them with anger and hate immediately.

Cuz trust me, as someone who's actually helped transphobic people come around, immediately being hateful never works.

[capwilliamsxn]

All of the girls are so much less active on social media, they post next to nothing anymore. In interviews they used to talk about how they loved being accessible to fans but I think their minds may be changing as their fame grows. It’s a real shame because it’s part of what made the women’s game so special - that they were seen as “real people” when the men with millions of followers and such fame seem less like real people. It made fans feel more connected. I understand why but it doesn’t make it any less of a shame

it’s not fame making them hardly interact/post on socials anymore.

new fans have made it almost impossible to just make a simple personal post anymore. i mean, leah posts something with her best-friends for years or even her cousins and people come up with dating rumours. they can’t even post their teammates without people saying that they’re dating each other (which yes, has always happened but recently has gotten so much worse and widespread).

also, when they do make personal posts or comments, people act like they deserve more. leah and jordan used interact with each other on socials but people weren’t just happy that they were sharing what they were. loads of people were acting like it was their right to have that and more.

all of the girls still talk about how important it is to be visible, and they still make sure that they’re accessible and seen as real people. but they’re all doing that in a way that’s less personal than it had been in previous years.

for example, leah is open and honest about her mental health and endo struggles, which many women can relate to and it gives young kids dealing with the same thing someone to look up to. another example, leah responded to a leeds player who was excited to play against her and wanted her shirt, asking instead if they could swap and saying she couldn’t wait to meet her.

yes it’s disappointing that they don’t interact as much anymore, especially for those who do respect boundaries and don’t push them for ‘content’. but, what do you expect. they’re all harassed daily by people who act like they deserve to know what’s going on in their lives and aren’t happy enough with what they do get.

so yes, i get what you’re trying to say and i agree that it is a shame. but i don’t agree that it’s due to fame and i don’t think they’re that unattainable to fans. they’ve just been forced to interact in a more controlled way, to minimise the rumours and lies made up about them.

[horizon-verizon]

What do you think of having made Helaena a dreamer in the series? I personally have mixed feelings about this, but one thing is for sure, giving him autistic traits was a mistake.

*EDITED POST* (3/19/24)

Disclaimer: I really don't know anything about neurodivergence or autism.

Here is one earlier post that I wrote about an issue with Helaena’s new characterization.

I used to think that it was nice to see some neurodivergent representation and that she got to be a little more than just the “plump” “fine mother” Gyldayn describes her. But it’s just that: “little”.

Now:

A) Dragon dreams are...dreams. Not visions you have while fully awake. So...

B) I think that it Helaena’s characterization suffers from the reliance on her neurodivergence. Neurodivergence does not equal personality. We don’t know her other than one small scene of her unintentionally(?) calling Aegon out, that she liked to play with bugs in her youth, and that she doesn’t like her own mother. These aren’t personality traits they are conviences for the greens’ image.

And the prophecies she speaks does nothing but tell us what we--the book readers--already know will happen, except for Rhaenys, but that was a scene that also never should have happened. We’re supposed to be wowed by how she is like Cassandra--the prophet who no one believes after cursed by Apollo for not sleeping with him or otherwise disobeying him. At least Cassandra is trying and much more active in her story, using her visions to try to stop catastrophe even though she knows or we may make the argument she already knew and thus this is where the Greek tale's futility comes from. HotD is not using this kind of futility but it is expressing a futility while keeping Helaena a passive victim.

But using the futility of Cassandra’s story element to express how “futile” and “tragic” the Dance was diminishes human choice more than i needs to--how Alicent decides to go after Rhaenyra and tries to get Aegon on the throne for power. Diminishes the activeness of human decision specifically for the people already having lost their ambition in the adaptation from the original story to the show:

Alicent is a such younger sexual abuse victim (after years of fans having said that there was too much sexual abuse or violence esp against women in GoT) who apparently can't really reason as she would have in the book version and is more vulnerable to her father's machinations rather than her being a go getter herself

Rhaenyra's muster has also been greatly diminished

even Aemond's whitewashed and made less active by his killing Luke made into an "accident").

Then there is what another writers says about how we know what will happen to her. The show gives us the only neuro-divergent character and we know she’ll lose her son to Blood and Cheese, of which she obviously blamed herself for, driving her into a mad grief. That she will die a horrid, “suspicious” death. Her suffering will be used to generate more sympathy for the greens, while diminishing and ignoring that Daemon only uses B&C for what Aemond did to Lucerys. (Again, eye-for-an-eye is not moral or justifiable. I’ have said over and over that it is rather Aemond and Alicent’s fault for targeting Rhaenyra.) The show till then inadvertently act like the biased Maester Gyldayn, who also just refers to Helaena's death; the writer ponders over how her death inspired rebellion against Rhaenyra and seems to lean towards Rhaenyra actually doing it, even though it brings up the missing Larys and the possibility that he spread the rumors to incite the peasants against Rhaenyra more than they would have otherwise.

This cheapens her, especially because we don’t really get to see her apart from her Alicent, her brothers, and her kids. Nor do we see her interact with Aemond or Aegon like the two eldest boys do in episodes 6-9.

Rhaenyra’s story was about how women in Westeros would be pushed further back into practically subservient positions, and Daenerys was meant to be a penetration into that element. Rhaenyra is the story of how a precedent against women in power came to be; Dany is when a women pushes back and begins to regain that power.

So Helaena doing nothing more than tell visions that don’t matter while she stays in her room with her children and tries to get her own mother to stop touching her and knowing that she’ll die a horrendous death after long grieving and torturing herself for her son’s death just so she becomes some sort of Martyr for green-stans makes for a more disheartening picture than I’d like.

Oh, and it doesn't really make sense for her to know what's going to happen to not just her siblings and parents but her CHILDREN and not go to Viserys, the most prophecy-focused person in her family as well as the most able to actually do something to turn things around.

Dragon dreams in ASoIaF are fixed but they do not say that a specific person WILL do this so much as someone must do this for that to happen...unless they're Dany, Daenys, Rhaegar, & Aegon I.