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81scorp · 10 months ago

Text

Constructive criticism: Space Jam 2 and Scoob!

Ah yes, Space Jam: A New Legacy and Scoob!

Space Jam: A New Legacy

We live in a time where you can make movies about everything. Books, comics, video games, board games, old SNL skits and even commercials.

In 1992 and 1993, two Super Bowl Nike ads, "Hare Jordan" and "Aerospace Jordan" respectively, aired on television and featured Michael Jordan and Bugs Bunny. Both ads were commerically succesful and led to the green-lighting of a film featuring Jordan and Bugs.

The project was closed when Jordan retired from basketball in 1993, only to be reopened in 1995 when Jordan returned to play basketball again.

In 1996 Space Jam was released; a movie where the Looney tunes recruit Michael Jordan to help them beat a gang of aliens in a game of basketball.

The movie was a big hit at the Box Office and did OK with the critics.

When I saw it I found it enjoyably OK, and still do. Sure, it`s not the next Who framed Roger Rabbit, but it`s fine.

Years later Warner Bros. decided to cash in on the Space Jam nostalgia, and in 2021 they released Space Jam A New Legacy to the theaters.

It didn`t do that well at the Box Office and received generally negative reviews from critics for its humor, overlong runtime, and particularly for its extensive product placement of WarnerMedia properties.

This is another one of those movies that I haven`t seen but I know what happens in it thanks to watching videos about it on youtube.

So, if I could travel back in time with the help of a timemachine from ACME, what would I have changed?

I would not make it about the Looney tunes competing in a sport against a team of bad guys. From what I`ve seen from trailers and other videos, the movie put a lot of emphasis on "Look at how many IPs we have!" with all the references to other WB movies, just like Disney did in Ralph Breaks the Internet. So I would keep the whole "Looney tunes meets some of WB`s other animated characters" angle. The LT characters should be made with 2D animation, or at least 3D animation that looks convincingly 2D.

Plot

Our main protagonist, let`s call her Jody, (played by Zendaya) works at some big megastore (maybe Walmart?) and is bored with her own life. She would like to go out and travel the world but she rarely has enough money. When she has money she doesn`t have enough time and sometimes she just too stuck in her rut to carpe that diem. One night her apartment is invaded by Bugs Bunny, Lola Bunny, Porky Pig and Daffy Duck. (In this universe cartoon characters are NOT something common like it was in Roger Rabbit, so Jody is quite shocked she she sees them.)

The toons reveal that that there is trouble in the animated world, a big, evil space lord, let`s call him... Monty Cosmos (voiced by Don Cheadle), is taking over and is trying to enslave the animated world. (Not a very original idea, I know.)

Monty Cosmos` personality is similar to Hades from Disney`s Hercules. A couple of toons that have already joined him by their own free will are: Elmer Fudd, Yosemite Sam, Marvin the Martian, Wile E. Coyote and Taz.

Bugs, Lola, Daffy and Porky tried to fight Cosmos but were overpowered, forced to flee and ended up in her world by accident and have been trying to find a way back.

Suddenly Taz breaks through the door to her apartment. A portal opens, Bugs, Lola, Daffy, Porky and even Jody are forced to escape through it. They are now in the animated world, the one who opened the portal was an animated professor (It could be an already existing character or a character made for this movie.) Jody meets not just the Looney tunes but many other characters as well, like Tiny Toons, Animaniacs, Freakazoid, Tom and Jerry, The Iron Giant, pretty much any character from an animated franchise owned by WB.

The story is kinda like a mix between Lord of the Rings and Crisis on infinte Earths, but PG and more humorous. The gang and Jody need to go to a place to find a thing that they can take with them and use to defeat Monty Cosmos, but their journey is not easy.

I would include Pepé Le Pew in my movie, but I would dial down the more problematic parts of his behaviour. I would also include Minerva Mink and Heloise Nerz (better known as Hello Nurse) in the movie, and I would imply that they were bi or pansexual and attracted to each other. Pinky and the Brain would also be in the movie, they would be working with Cosmos. The Brain however, would have plans to, when the time was right, get rid of Cosmos and take over his throne. This is The Brain we`re talking about after all, he`d rather be in power than serve the man in power.

In the end, when Monty is defeated, Fred (from Scooby Doo) shows up to see "who is hiding behind the mask" and starts to pull on Monty`s face.

Monty Cosmos: "Ow! Stop it you idiot! This is my real face!"

Fred: "Oh! Sorry! Old habit."

Happy ending. Everybody celebrates. Jody is glad she got to have an adventure and Pinky and the Brain return to their lab to prepare for tomorrow night.

Pinky: "Why, Brain? What are we going to do tomorrow night?"

Brain: "The same thing we do every night, Pinky — try to take over the world!"

Aand... That`s all folks!

What would I call this film since it doesn`t have basketball (or any other kind of sport) in it?

Maybe:

Looney tunes: Through the Looniverse

Looney tunes: Across the Looniverse

(Something with Looney tunes and Looniverse.)

It`s not that think that Zendaya did a bad job voicing Lola, (then again, I haven`t seen the movie) but it feels like the people behind this decision were thinking: "Who needs experienced voice actors when you have celebrities? People will like this movie because of all the celebrities!" While celebrities are fun you can`t rely completely on them to carry an entire movie. And since this movie didn`t do well at the Box Office I think we can safely say that this kind of strategy isn`t exactly foolproof.

Space Jam wasn`t a masterpiece, like I said earlier: it was OK, but it was an interesting kind of OK, and the later half of the nineties was an interesting time.

A New Legacy was more interested in trying to catch lightning in a bottle again by doing pretty much the same things the first one did in a time full or remakes, reboots and rehashes.

And yes, I realized that my idea is similar to Looney tunes: back in action.

Scoob!

Back in June 2014, Warner Bros. Pictures decided to reboot the Scooby-Doo film series with an animated film. After a few years, Scoob! came out in 2020 (not the greatest time to go to the cinema).

Set in a Hanna-Barbera animated shared universe, the film follows Mystery Incorporated working with the Blue Falcon to stop Dick Dastardly's evil plan to unleash Cerberus.

It received mixed reviews from critics, who praised its animation, voice performances, and sense of nostalgia but criticized its modernization, writing, and polarizing casting choices.

Unlike A New Legacy, this is a movie that I actually did see.

So, if I could travel back in time and make some changes to this movie, what would I change?

I would have gotten away with it, if it hadn`t been for those meddling SPOILERS!

Fred, Blue Falcon, Dynomutt and captain Cavemans personalities

Fred is too much of a stupid dudebro for my liking and Blue Falcon is too juvenile and obsessed with social media to be a functional crimefighter. I guess these changes were made to pander to the 7 to 10 year olds in the audience.

I was gonna suggest that their personalities should be more like they were in the show but Fred and Blue Falcon didn`t really have that much of a personality.

So, make Fred more like a Steve Rogers-like boy-scout who wants to do the right thing. Blue Falcon could be like Kevin Conroy`s Batman with a little hint of Adam West`s Batman. He could deliver funny lines in a serious way.

Dynomutt should be stupid.

Captain Caveman should have been like he was in the show, voiced by an experienced voice actor. When he spoke I couldn`t hear Captain Caveman, only a celebrity doing a celebrity voice.

I would also imply that Velma is gay, because representation matters.

Synopsis

I like the part in the beginning with the mystery gang as kids, so I`m keeping that in my version.

Fast forward to the present: The gang is at a diner being interviewed by a reporter (Lose Simon Cowell, his cameo is pointless.) and she brings up everyones strenghts and what they bring to the group. But questions what it is that Scooby and Shaggy does that helps the group, she has done her research and says that most of the times that they have managed to catch the bad guys in monster costumes it despite of Shaggy and Scooby`s effort, not because of it.

Shaggy and Scooby object and try to come up with examples of how they help the group, but just end up helping the reporter`s argument.

Shaggy and Scooby start to question themselves, the rest of the gang try to comfort them.

Fred gets a text message that someone wants them to invesigate a haunted house, the gang drives to the house and are greeted by a blonde woman named Ms. Jaffe who`s late grandfather used to own the house. The gang investigates and the usual weird things that you can expect happens: paintings of people seem to watch them wherever they go. Velma finds tiny little wrappings of foil, the kinds you use for chocolate bobons. Shaggy and Scoob get separated from the rest of the gang, they look out of the window and see a strange, almost invisible UFO in the sky. Things start to shake, they try to escape. Fred, Velma and Daphne gets out of the house, but where`s Scooby and Shaggy? The house collapses and the strange, almost invisible UFO in the sky disappears.

The gang is devastated. (They are being watched by a tiny little robot, hiding in a tree and Ms. Jaffe is nowhere to be seen.)

Act 2

Shaggy and Scooby wake up inside a futuristic airship, they realize that they are inside the Falcon Fury, Blue Falcon's plane. Blue Falcon, Dynomutt and Dee Dee Skyes show up to greet them.

They explain that they have been tracking a dangerous man named Dick Dastardly and have noticed that Dastardly has had his eye out for Scooby, so they figured that the best thing to do would be to keep Scooby away from him.

All at once, an alarm goes off in the ship alerting that Dick Dastardly and his ship, The Mean Machine, are close by.

Dastardly orders the robots, who he calls Rottens, to attack the Falcon Fury. He says that he was so close to catching Scooby at the house until it at fell apart (literally), but he won`t fail again! He will get back what he lost!

(Note: In my version Dastardly has a habit of eating small chocolate bonbons.)

The Mean Machine latches onto the Falcon Fury using harpoons and is about to drag it in when Dee Dee tells Dynomutt to send out the beam that sucked up Shaggy and Scooby, but to put it on the reverse setting, so that it pushes them away from the Mean Machine. This works, and they escape Dastardly and the Mean Machine for the time being.

Now that they are temporarily safe, Dynomutt, Blue Falcon, and Dee Dee explain to Shaggy and Scooby that Dastardly is collecting the skulls of Cerberus, although they still don't know what they have to do with Shaggy and Scooby. Dee Dee comes to the conclusion that Dastardly wants Shaggy and Scooby alive, as he could have killed them earlier instead of just trying to capture them. Blue Falcon says that Shaggy and Scooby are important, though they still don't know why, and that they'll need their help on their mission. Shaggy is, at first, reluctant to agree but realizes that he can use this opportunity to prove to himself, and that reporter who made him question himself, that he is important and useful!

Back at what`s left of the haunted house: Daphne, Velma and Fred are searching in the rubble after their friends, Fred gets a text message. It`s Shaggy! He and Scooby are still alive, thank goodness! He says that he is on an adventure with Blue Falcon and also adds that they should watch out for a guy named Dick Dastardly.

Velma does a little computer hacking and finds out that Dick owns Dastardly Demolitions. He`s also stolen the first skull of Cerberus and the genealogical records of many dogs. They decide to go after him and help Shaggy and Scooby. The tiny little robot that watched them earlier is now hiding in their van.

Inside of the Mean Machine: Dastardly is lamenting over the fact that Scooby got away. He becomes upset at the Rottens because, in his mind, they are not nearly as good as his last sidekick. One of the Rottens apologizes for their failure, but that only upsets him more. He calls him a "suck-up," and to prove a point to the other Rottens, he removes his head and replaces it with the top of a vacuum cleaner.

The Falcon Fury: Blue Falcon and Dee Dee are searching for the second skull by locating areas with high fossil density. Dynomutt, on the other hand, is trying to find the skull by asking people on social media where it is. Shaggy and Scooby come in, their hands full of food. Dynomutt just got a DM from "a very reliable anonymous source" that the skull is in an abandoned amusement park in Romania. Dee Dee and Blue Falcon, not being stupid, ignores this, but Shaggy thinks it`s worth looking into. Blue Falcon decides to go along with this idea, just so Dynomutt can see that blindly trusting people on social media is not a good idea.

Meanwhile, in the Mystery Machine: Velma reveals that by cross-matching the biographical data that Dastardly stole, she is able to determine that Scooby is the last descendant of Peritas, Alexander the Great's dog. Fred changes course, as he claims he "knows a shortcut."

The abandoned amusement park in Romania: As soon as they walk inside the park, the Mean Machine ascends from the sky. Dastardly and the Rottens fly down and Dastardly reveals that he was the one who sent Dynomutt the DM and that he has just retrieved the second skull. Dee Dee, Blue Falcon and Dynomutt fight the Rottens as Shaggy and Scooby look for a place to hide. The Rottens chase Shaggy and Scooby into an arcade, they play "whack-a-mole" with the Rottens, trying to destroy them. Dastardly breaks into the arcade and when Shaggy asks what he wants with him, Dastardly reveals that Shaggy isn't important at all and that he only wants Scooby. He shoots Shaggy out of the arcade and he falls into a Ferris wheel seat where he is attacked by the Rottens but saved by Dee Dee.

Scooby escapes the arcade and runs into a house of mirrors, where Dastardly is waiting for him and tells him that if they join forces, he could make him "the most important dog in the world." He explains that Scooby is the key to something very important. Scooby refuses to help Dastardly and runs out of the house of mirrors, where more chaos is happening.

Dee Dee deploys the tractor beam, which pulls BF, Dynomutt, Shaggy and Scoob into the Falcon Fury. Dastardly is alerted by the Rotten in the Mystery Machine of the existence of Fred, Daphne, and Velma.

Scooby tells Dee Dee and BF what Dastardly told him. Dynomutt is shocked that an anonymous source on the internet could be so unreliable. Shaggy is disappointed in himself because he was the one who supported this idea. Scooby tries to comfort him.

Dastardly Demolitions (a factory in the middle of nowhere): Fred, Velma and Daphne have arrived and are looking for a way in. Velma finds finds little candy wrappings made out of foil on the ground. Suddenly a car shows up, it`s Ms. Jaffe. She wanted to make sure that they were OK and wonders if she can be of any help. Velma is not fooled by her act.

First of all: the "old house that belonged to her grandfather" may have looked old but she noticed some details that proved that it was built only a few days ago.

Second: In the old house she found some chocolate bonbon wrappings of the same brand the she found just now on the ground, a rare brand that is not sold in many places.

Velma: "You work for Dick Dastardly, don`t you?"

Ms. Jaffe (in Dick Dastradly`s voice): "Oh well, I guess the jig is up" (Takes off disguise.)

(When he reveals himself the gang reacts in surprise, not fear and disgust.)

Velma: "That... was my second guess."

Dastardly deploys his Rottens to pull Velma, Fred, and Daphne up into the Mean Machine and locks them in a cell.

Dusty, the Rotten with the vacuum head, walks by their cell. Daphne persuades him to let them out of the cage after cleaning out the dust in his head. They creep to the center of the Mean Machine, where they spy on Dastardly, who is using the two skulls of Cerberus to reveal that the third is hidden in a place called Messick Mountain. Dusty points them to a room with a communications device. Velma hacks into Dynomutt, telling Dee Dee that the third skull is at Messick Mountain. In the room, they find a pinboard, revealing Dastardly's plans for Scooby. They learn that Scooby, being the descendant of Peritas, is the only one who can open up the gates to the Underworld, where Alexander the Great hid his treasure. They also find a display shelf of Muttley's things.

Dastardly breaks in, catching them. When asked about Muttley he gets furious and tells them it`s none of their business. The Rottens then come in to take away Velma and Daphne, but Dastardly keeps Fred as he has "big plans" for him.

Messick Mountain: The Falcon Fury arrives at Messick Mountain, which turns out to have a Mesozoic ecosystem. Shaggy, feeling that he only screws things up, decides to wait by the ship. While investigating the landscape, Blue Falcon and Scooby run into Captain Caveman, the protector of the third skull. He takes them to an arena, filled with other cavepeople, to get the skull, they must defeat him in battle.

Fred, shows up to the Falcon Fury, alone in the Mystery Machine. He tells Shaggy that they need to go to Scooby, as he's in great danger.

Captain Caveman battles Scooby and Blue Falcon. Dee Dee and Dynomutt show up to help and defeat Captain Caveman. Fred and Shaggy show up in the Mystery Machine. Fred reveals that he`s actually Dastardly in disguise. The Mean Machine appears overhead and Velma, Daphne, and the real Fred are thrown overboard, although they are caught by the crew of the Falcon Fury. Dastardly kidnaps Scooby and escapes with him and the third skull on the Mean Machine. The gang and the Falcon Fury crew head back to the ship, only to find that it has been destroyed by Dastardly.

Shaggy says that he may mess up and fail at a lot of stuff. But today he won`t fail his best friend Scoob!

Inspired by his determination the rest of the mystery gang and the Falcon Fury crew start to build something from the wreck of the Falcon Fury.

Act 3

The Parthenon in Athens, Greece: Dastardly ascends with the three skulls and Scooby. He connects the skulls which generates the gates to the Underworld and turns the sky dark. Suddenly, the Mystery Machine appears in the sky, having been transformed to have wings and jets. Dastardly orders for it to be shot down, but Dusty purposely misfires so that Daphne's life is saved. However, the Mystery Machine still falls to the ground, it's wings being shot off.

Dastardly forces Scooby's paw upon the lock of the gates, opening them up. Cerberus appears at the gates, something Dastardly was not expecting. Cerberus runs out, creating enough commotion for Scooby to run off to the Mystery Machine. The gang is finally reunited! Dastardly goes into the Underworld, where he finds his old sidekick Muttley! He gets a flashback to the day when he first opened the portal and convinced Muttley to go through it. The portal closed and Muttley was stuck in the Underworld. They rejoice at seeing each other, grab as much treasure as they can carry, and leave through the portal.

The gang and the Falcon Fury crew begin attacking Cerberus. The Rottens, at the command of Dusty, deploy themselves, deciding to help the gang instead of Dastardly.

Shaggy and Scooby, with help from the Rottens, manage to trick Cerberus to go back to the Underworld. The portal is closing, if they don`t hurry they`ll be stuck in the Underworld forever! Shaggy and Scooby run as fast as they can with Cerberus chasing them and they make it just as the portal closes!

The Rottens, now good, capture Muttley and Dastardly and bring them to the gang, all tied up. Fred wants to see "who is hiding behind the mask" and starts to pull on Dastradly`s face.

Dastardly: "Ow! Stop it you moron! This is my real face!"

Fred: "Oh! Sorry! Old habit."

Dastardly yells that "he would have gotten away with it if it hadn`t been for those meddling kids!" The Falcon Fury crew take him and Muttley away.

Back at Venice Beach, the gang has an opening ceremony for their new base. The Falcon Fury crew shows up and Blue Falcon gives Fred a new, updated version of the Mystery Machine, as the old one was destroyed. Mystery Inc. gets a call that tells them that there have been sightings of a phantom tuna trawler and the ghost of a sea captain. The gang heads off in a haste, to pursue new mysteries!

And that`s how I would do it.

This little rewrite ended up longer than I had anticipated.

To be completely honest: I didn`t quite remember all the details of what happened in Scoob! so I went to Scoobypedia to refresh my memory and ended up copy pasting a lot of the synopsis into my editorial. I removed things that were unnecessary, like Scooby and Shaggy`s forced break up and Blue Falcon`s character arc (because this is not his movie.)

It is of course very easy for me to write these because I have the luxury of hindsight. And unlike the filmmakers I didn`t have a movie studio breathing down my neck, focus grouping the movie to death, forcing in unnecessary changes and pressuring me to get it made before a deadline.

Why do I write these?

For several reasons. I`m nitpicky, sometimes the movies I criticize aren`t bad, I just like my own ideas better, sometimes the movies I critize are bad, I care about good storytelling and it`s a fun excerize in creativity and script doctoring.

But also because I have a lot of of free time.

--------------------------------------------

Written stuff: 56

Started writing this 2024-03-07

Comments are appreciated.

Sources: Wikipedia and Scoob!`s Scoobypedia page.

Other movies on my Constructive Criticism list that you can look forward to

Supergirl (1984) Jonah Hex (2010) Dragonball evolution The Spirit (2008) The Dark Knight trilogy Raya and the last Dragon Wish (2023)

And as usual: English is not my first language, so if my writing doesn`t seem to flow naturally, you know why.

#editorial #looney tunes #written stuff #constructive criticism #scooby doo #scoob #space jam a new legacy #81scorp

0 notes

ducktracy · 3 years ago

Note

what do you think of who framed roger rabbit?

time to get philosophical about Roger Rabbit--what will they think of next?

IN SHORT... i like it! a lot of my criticisms i feel are me being too nitpicky and overly passionate about cartoons and animation history, and those criticisms aren’t CONSTANTLY on my mind while watching it, which is nice. i’ve actually only seen the film in full twice because i keep getting so sucked into the Daffy/Donald piano duel that i rewatch it 1,000 times and forget to finish the movie HAHA. but for what it does, i enjoy it, i’m happy it spawned a renowned interest in golden age animation, Mel Blanc actually sounds pretty good considering they sped his voice up for a change (which, Daffy Duck’s Quackbusters, released the same year, did NOT, and he definitely sounds like an 80 year old man voicing then 50 year old characters) and it always puts me in a good mood when i do get to watch it. so, overall, i like it!

on the OTHER hand, i definitely feel it sometimes verges into an approximation of cartoons rather than an actual ode to them. many of the gags and Roger’s entire existence feel like exaggerations of exaggerations and a basic caricature of, say, Tex Avery gags (which are carefully thought out and deliberately paced, rather than everything bouncing off the walls at once). i think it shows that Richard Williams didn’t have as deep of an appreciation for comedy and slapstick and the likes--he was brilliant, don’t get me wrong, and GREAT at Disney-esque animation, but there’s an obvious detachment between his interpretation of slapstick comedy and what’s actually in it

Roger could benefit from the more subtle comedy of ‘40s animation, because golden age animation was not NEARLY all about explosions and ACME gags and all of that. Roger is about as unsubtle you can get LOL. i feel like the story kinda requires Roger to have a broader emotional range/capacity than he actually does. a caricature of a caricature can only do so much, and such a heavy plot doesn’t create the juxtaposition i think they were hoping for.

and Toontown is neat, but, like what i mentioned before, it suffers from being a caricature/approximation of cartoon tropes and gags and comes off as a bit cloying in that regard... i guess that kinda feeds into the “cartoons are all family” complaint i have too, a lot of people saw these approximations and read them as fact and have boiled cartoons down to today.

i also don’t like how... obnoxious... the cartoons are made out to be. they all act like cartoons are the most annoying and obnoxious creatures on the planet and... they are in the film, which i disagree with a lot, but i think that goes back to the issue of subtlety (or lack thereof). it’d be better if the cartoons were treated as though they were being annoying when in actuality they Weren’t... i don’t know. call me sensitive but the idea of collectively viewing the cartoons as annoying, trope-y beings who are made to be hated doesn’t sit well with me, even if it all ends in one big happy family ending

even more nitpicky which i’m not actually riled up about but it IS fun to comment on; i could go into all the anachronisms about characters like Marvin and the Road Runner, who were made in 1948/1949, existing in a story taking place in 1947 or showing the 1949 cartoon Goofy Gymnastics or *a giant piano falls on my head*

also. just a personal thing but i’ve never been crazy about the word “toons” (it’s so weird but for me it feels like it falls into that Approximation/Caricature thing again even though it’s. a word. LOL.) and every time Eddie grumbles “toons.” before taking a swig of alcohol i have to bite my lip from laughing

and as cool as Jessica is, her design... doesn’t her back hurt????? :’)

EITHER WAY. i know how ridiculously foolish this sounds and i’ll happily admit it. it’s a miracle this movie was made in the first place and it’s easily leagues above any LT movie in my book, and i’m VERY grateful for what it does--i just wish it did some things better or paid more attention to certain things. either way, despite my nitpicking i wholly enjoy it and the Daffy/Donald scene is genuinely one of the most ecstasy-inducing moments of film i’ve had the pleasure to endure. (facetious wording aside i genuinely do love it so so so so much and it’s easily my favorite part of the film)

i also have these Richard Williams sketches of Porky and Daffy saved... i phrased that as though i was going to make a point but i don’t know what point that would be. but they’re CYOOT

#APOLOGIES THIS IS LONG #anonymous

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just-kit-ink · 5 years ago

Note

All the rest of WFRR characters loll

*deep breath*

//Okay let's do this! I'm only doing characters that were created for the movie/those that had the most screentime.

Part 1/2

Lt. Santino

1: sexuality headcanon: We never really see/hear about a significant other in the film but I'm going to headcanon that he's bisexual but closeted.

2: otp: ? Maybe he has a lover we don't know about who also works at the police station.

3: brotp: Him and Eddie Valiant of course!

4: notp: Him with Jessica or Dolores

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: That he's been a friend of Eddie's since his brother was still alive and on the force. That he doesn't have as much of a prejudice towards toons as his detective buddy does.

6: favorite line from this character: "Marvin Acme...the rabbit CACKED him last night!"

7: one way in which I relate to this character: He has to look away when Doom dips the shoe.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: That he treats Eddie's drinking problem as an inconvinience instead of an addiction.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: Complete cinnamon roll, just a very professional one.

Marvin Acme

1: sexuality headcanon: He likes the laaaaddiies

2: otp: Don't know? I always assumed he was already married and if not that at least has a string of messy affairs/seperations with both human and toon women.

3: brotp: I'll bet he was at least on speaking terms with RK Maroon before his death.

4: notp: Him and Jessica Rabbit of any sort, even fake for the cameras.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: He's pulled the disappearing ink trick with wealthier and scarier people. Some found it amusing, others earned him a black eye.

6: favorite line from this character: "Oh it's a Panic!"

7: one way in which I relate to this character: I love cartoons and I laugh a lot.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: The fact that he keeps on pestering Eddie with his gags even after Eddie has made it clear that he's not in the mood. Also the Patty-Cake pictures, where he's making all those sounds but you can't see what's happening!

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: A little bit of both. On one hand, he loves what he does and clearly has a respect for Toons but he also did business with Maroon which eventually lead to his death at the hands of Judge Doom.

Dolores

1: sexuality headcanon: Heterosexual and in love/going steady with Eddie Valiant

2: otp: Dolores and Eddie

3: brotp: Also her and Eddie as well as her and Roger but I quite like the idea of her being good friends with Jessica.

4: notp: Her and any of her patrons.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: That she and Eddie love Catalina so much because it was where they met. Eddie, Teddy and their father were doing a circus show there and needed a volunteer from the audience. He pulled a bouquet out of thin air and gave it to her and then pretended to saw her in half - it was so romantic!

6: favorite line from this character: Too many! She's such a sass mouth! "Dabbling in watercolours, Eddie?" "Is that a rabbit in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" and "Is he always this funny or only on days when he's wanted for murder?"

7: one way in which I relate to this character: That she works hard and is tired all the time.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: The scene where she sees Eddie and Jessica together and Eddie's trousers have fallen down while Jessie is talking to him and it looks...bad. Doesn't help tt he bumps his head on her chest as he goes to pull them up.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: Cinnamon roll that you don't want to mess with!

Baby Herman

1: sexuality headcanon: He loves human women...and is possibly a little bit gay for some male toons. (But the idea of that is weird to me, because he's literally a baby it's like shipping Stewie Griffen with someone.)

2: otp: Him and his human girlfriend that you see in the movie. I think she's just credited as "Ms Herman."

3: brotp: Baby Herman and Roger Rabbit. Before Roger started being late to rehearsals and messing up his cues, they were best friends.

4: notp: Probably him and Jessica, although he is very envious of Roger.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: He plays both male and female baby roles. That everything in his home is baby-themed, right down to the giant cot and mobile. If he needs anything, he calls his mistress via a baby monitor.

6: favorite line from this character: "The whole thing stinks like yesterday's diapers!" and "What da hell was wrong with that take?!"

7: one way in which I relate to this character: Looks pure but is actually a foul-mouth.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: When he throws a tantrum because he dropped his cigar after Eddie pushed his pram down the hall...and when he darts underneath a woman's skirt...and the fact that he claims to have a "50 year old lust and a 3 year old dinky..." Wtf.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: Both. He's a baby who chain smokes and can wrap anyone around his little finger by offering to pay them.

Benny the Cab

1: sexuality headcanon: Well he's a car, so I don't think gender's an issue. If you're wheels are shined and you got a nice set of headlights, he doesn't mind.

2: otp: I'd pair him with a nice flower-glass Corvette.

3: brotp: Benny and Roger. He is Roger's car after all.

4: notp: Him and any human character.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: That he also often appears in Roger Rabbit shorts, as the vehicle for a quick getaway during a chase, or comedic car wash scene.

6: favorite line from this character: "Sister, Mary Francis, what the hell happened in here?" and "I can't believe they locked me up for driving on the sidewalk!"

7: one way in which I relate to this character: Likes helping, makes sarcastic quips.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: That he drives straight through the Dip and burns his tires and has to waddle over to Roger when he finds him which is like the equivalent of burning your feet with acid to him. Also, when he tells Roger to be careful using a real gun because "this ain't no cartoon ya know!" ...As he, a car, drives away in his own car.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: Cinnamon roll unless you're a fan of the Brooklyn Dodgers.

Smartass Weasel

1: sexuality headcanon: I'm going to go with pansexual. He only cares if you have status and are not human (though that doesn't mean he hasn't had a fling with one or two.)

2: otp: No love interest in the film. Although I'm kind of a sucker for a tough guy character falling for a really sweet and innocent character.

3: brotp: Him and the rest of the Toon Patrol. He does care for them and he only hits them for laughing because he knows they are suscepitable to dying from it. Also, I feel like he would have gotten along better with Eddie Valiant had he not fallen in with Judge Doom because they're both bitter and hate the industry.

4: notp: I would say him and Doom. Or any of his boys.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: That he was drawn to be wicked but not a villain. He has multiple other items aside from his suit that are bright pink because he likes to dress flashy...and that the only people exempt from potential target by his patrol are children.

6: favorite line from this character: Honestly, every line of his is terrific. "Step outta line and we'll leave you and your laundry out to dry!" "Say Boss, what do we do with the wallflower?" and "Want us to disresemble the place?"

7: one way in which I relate to this character: Small but feisty.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: That all his team members get cute little toon ghosts when they die but he just...dissolves in Dip.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: Problematic fave definetly! But even though he's mean, sneaky and carries a lot of weapons, he's also funny, charming and I can't help but feel a bit sorry for him because he was just tryig to please his boss. Weasels certainly are assigned villain roles in cartoons and maybe he was just fed up with it so he decided to become a real one.

Greasy Weasel

1: sexuality headcanon: Heterosexual, biromantic...and he's an utter sex-pest.

2: otp: He needs someone who can reign him and his desires in so he can actually focus on whatever he's doing.

3: brotp: Him and the rest of the Toon Patrol, especially Smartass. He admires his boss' attitude.

4: notp: Him and Jessica. Their encounter in the film is cringe-worthy to watch.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: That he has a gentler, romantic side deep down but doesn't want to show it because he has too much bravado.

6: favorite line from this character: "I'll handle this one..." followed closely by a LOT of uncensored Spanish curse words!

7: one way in which I relate to this character: We both get crushes easily.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: When he reaches down Jessica's dress. He's so confident until her hidden bear-trap clamps onto his hand. He probably replayed the first three seconds beforehand over and over in his head though.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: Problematic fav for sure! Perverted, knife-wielding henchman who reaches into someone's bosom in a canon Disney movie. Yet, he's still weirdly adorable. If he were human, I might say different.

Wheezy Weasel

1: sexuality headcanon: I'm just going to say it...I headcanon him as gay and asexual.

2: otp: Don't really see him with anyone unless they're another smoker, (or are willing to put up with smoke.)

3: brotp: Definetly him and Stupid! Look at the way they drill through the wall together and laugh at our hero's predicaments towards the end if the film! They're great pals, having a good time!

4: notp: Him and Greasy.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: He enjoys Camel cigarettes the best. And he's the best card player in the group.

6: favorite line from this character: It's so funny because he doesn't have many lines in the movie so I'm just going to say his dialogue from the Cartoon Spin ride at Disneyland "But Boss, Benny knows ToonTown, like the back of his tread!" and his laugh.

7: one way that I relate to this character: Chill most days until I see or hear something funny then I lose it.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: The fact that he tries to grab onto his ghost to try and pull it back into his body before it leaves.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: Problematic fav. Carries a tommy gun and is not afraid to use it, knows that smoking won't do him any harm since he's a toon and is good at following orders even if they're immoral.

Psycho Weasel

1: sexuality headcanon: N/A Psycho is like the family dog. A feral one...that was rescued from the streets.

2: otp: None. Unless you like snuggling, just mind the teeth.

3: brotp: Psycho and Stupid as well as him and Wheezy. Wheezy is like a parent looking after him and Stupid is like his sibling.

4: notp: Basically him with any other character.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: He doesn't really use his barber-shop razor for anything nefarious, but he likes how threatening he looks with it. Also, when you scratch behind his ear, his leg does the scritch thing where he kicks behind it.

6: favorite line from this character: "Time to kill the raaaabbbit...hee hee!"

7: one way in which I relate to this character: We're both a bit mad. He's just toonier. And we laugh like maniacs.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: When Eddie Valiant just straight up kicks him across across the bar when he tries to attack him.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: I'm going to say he's a problematic cinnamon roll. He has no problem doing wicked things but he's too small and cute to really be considered awful. At one point Eddie snatches Marvin Acme's will out of his hands and he looks like a kicked puppy. He bad but he baby.

Stupid Weasel

1: sexuality headcanon: A hopeless romantic for anyone, but too dumb to realise when someone's flirting with him.

2: otp: I like the idea of him and an equally dim character so they can both be ignorant and happy together.

3: brotp: Stupid and Psycho. They're just the children of the patrol.

4: notp: Him with his boys or human characters.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: He once got into a heated argument with another weasel who had broken into their hideout until Smartass informed him he was looking at a mirror.

6: favorite line from this character: Again, he gets hardly any lines. "Boss! Look at the little birdies!"

7: one way in which I relate to this character: I have my moments where common sense just leaves me.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: Him falling backwards into a row of humans at the bar when he is pushed by Eddie. They just...goes right down, like bowling pins or dominos.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: Despite being in the Toon Patrol he's a total cinnamon roll. I don't even think he knows what he's doing half the time and that's really sweet.

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writingaboutarchitecture · 7 years ago

Text

Architecture is Only a Movie

Scene from Who Framed Roger Rabit, 1988 (c) Touchstone Pictures

I. – THE STORY BEYOND MAKE-BELIEVE

EXT. ACME FACTORY - DAY

An L.A. police car turns into the yard of the Acme Factory and pulls up in front of the old factory building. There's all kinds of official activity in the yard... cop cars, a Coroner's truck, etcetera.

Valiant and Santino get out of the police car. Santino starts into the factory. But he realizes Valiant's not following him. He turns to see Valiant looking over the wall behind the factory, transfixed.

LT. SANTINO

Now what?

VALIANT

I just haven't been this close to

Toontown for a while.

In this scene from Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988), private investigator Eddie Valiant stops dead in his tracks, fixated on the Acme Factory and the gateway to ‘Toontown’. Filmed in White City’s historic, Grade II listed Dimco Buildings (1898), the factory setting provides a real, West London context – albeit far from its Hollywood backdrop.

Who Framed Roger Rabbit has the power to put an audience through the emotional wringer. A breakthrough in cinematic craftsmanship, it was the first film to convincingly combine real actors and animated characters in the same space at the same time. Despite distancing itself from the ‘real’ with its cartoon characters (Jessica Rabbit self-reflexively refers to her being drawn), the toons seemingly cast actual shadows. They change dimension and perspective as they move through a scene, and the camera isn’t locked down to make rotoscoping the live action sequences simpler. The animated characters feel 3D and seem to be occupying real space.

Valiant’s emotional connection to the factory building and what it stands for – the cartoon city from whence came the toon that killed his brother, by dropping a piano on his head, no less – mirrors the emotional attachment viewers often make upon seeing recognisable architecture on screen.

When architecture is the focal point of a film, the audience is drawn into that building’s history. The famous Bradbury Building (1893) in Los Angeles is one of the biggest architectural stars of the silver screen. Starring heavily in Ridley Scott’s Blade Runner (1982) its distinguishing filigree ironwork interior is depicted as a dark and gloomy ruin. The architectural landmark enriches the sci-fi thriller’s narrative depth. Its unique structure sparks a familiarity and is a key part of the film’s iconic aesthetic. It engenders our cyber-punk fantasies while grounding the fantasy dystopia in the real and the present – giving the story meaning beyond make-believe.

Bradbury Building, Blade Runner, 1982 (c) Warner Bros.

Filmmakers often play with time, space and light to create a cinematic architecture that conjures and sustains certain emotions from the audience. Director Andrei Tarkovsky captured the city in motion, using architecture in his films to lyrical effect. Believing “there is only one way of thinking in cinema: poetically,” he would create this poetry on screen with streams of associations. When poetic images are stitched together in film and in architecture, our existential sense is sharpened. Both cinema and architecture beget imaginative parables. Their kinship is often explored as our built environments create and preserve images of culture and a way of living. Cinema sheds light on the cultural archaeology of its own time, as well as the epoch it depicts.

Andrei Tarkovsky’s Nostalghia, 1983 (c) Rai 2

II. – ARCHITECTURE IS ONLY A MOVIE

The work of filmmaking collective Factory Fifteen oscillates between the realms of building and performance, the real and imaginary. Founded by Jonathan Gales, Paul Nicholls and Kibwe Tavares; the trio have been dubbed ‘radical visionaries’ since graduating from Unit 15 at the Bartlett School of Architecture. Synthesising filmmaking, architecture and 3D visualisation, they design wildly imaginative future cities. But, they don’t just draw heavily from architecture in their films – often, the film is the architectural project itself.

vimeo

In Cocoon (2015), moving architectural forms were projection mapped onto the inside of a dome at the SAT Immersion Experience Symposium in Montreal. The spherical video installation immersed visitors within its cinematic architecture. Creating an environment that was at once open and enclosed, moving structures rose up and around its inhabitants, only to fracture and then fall away. Nicholls explains: “Cocoon was about the feeling of being wrapped inside a 360°-projected, animated space. It achieves something static representation simply couldn't. It puts you on a journey through spaces, through archetypes and gives you a real sense of scale.”

The recent exhibition Five Years of Factory Fifteen, opened with a quote from urban theorist Paul Virilio: “After the age of architecture-sculpture we are now in the time of cinematographic factitiousness; literally as well as figuratively, from now on architecture is only a movie.”

The show was a celebration of Factory Fifteen’s films, which were played simultaneously on suspended screens in their new gallery and collaborative workspace, The Factory.

This collection of narratives had architecture at its core and was a “kind of lyrical wall of stories,” says Tavares. The installation brought together the kindred spirits of architecture and film in a cross-translation of 2D and 3D space. It revealed that only when architecture plays a leading role in film, building environments up (whether real or imagined) to be the story, can we begin to critique architecture in a new way.

Megalomania (2011, above) is one such critique, portraying a dystopian future London as a broken, unfinished labyrinth. Long camera takes engender a sense of spatial fluidity and unity, while the dark re-appropriation of space signifies a product of careless construction born of the desire to build more, build big and build now. Megalomania is a project that can only truly be represented through film, as the moving image most effectively critiques our ever-changing world. Gales cites Blade Runner as inspiration and “one of the first science fiction films that uses a layering technique that builds upon what we already have, to kind of envisage a near future that’s more tangible than something very distant.” In this way, Factory Fifteen’s films represent a future that is firmly rooted in the present.

Jonah (2014, below) is a visceral short film about two best friends with big dreams. Set in Zanzibar’s Stone Town, the story reveals the city’s dramatic transformation into a tourist hot-spot after the pair unwittingly photograph a colossal fish surging out of the sea. Humourously and dramatically told, the story illustrates the damaging effects of tourism and globalisation on developing countries. Directed by Tavares and with captivating computer generated visuals by Factory Fifteen, the short mixes live action and photoreal animation to stunning effect.

Despite moving into film from architecture, the Factory Fifteen team remain connected to their roots. Tavares notes that in Jonah, “the architecture is folded into the narrative as well as the production design. The image of the fish is what becomes famous, this becomes replicated in billboards, posters, physical signs and buildings – it’s all very Learning from Las Vegas.”

vimeo

III. – MOVING ALL THE TIME

“If all I see is dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, I won’t even read it. I don’t care how good the dialogue is – it’s a moving picture. It has to move all the time”

The self-proclaimed ‘half-assed actor’ turned Hollywood producer Bobby Evans’, view on scriptwriting. It echoes the architectural desire to create poetic movement in a building by guiding a person’s pathway and gradually exposing certain views, vistas and experiences along the way. Modernist maestro Le Corbusier called this journey and experience of space the architectural promenade.

Alejandro González Iñárritu’s Birdman (2014), which follows the decline of fading actor Riggan Thomson (Michael Keaton) is a tour de force of cinematic promenade. Set within New York’s St. James Theatre on Broadway, the camera slinks seamlessly through its spaces; down corridors, up staircases and bounding into the sky. Continuous long takes follow the protagonist in an uninterrupted motion through the theatre’s floorplan. There’s a constant sense of urgency and drama, accompanied by the driving beat of a drum. The rhythmic beat and the camera’s dynamism recalls that of our everyday modern lives, thanks to the seminal rise of the (aptly-named) Walkman. Life became instantly cinematic; a personal soundtrack to our lives, linking our movements through space.

Fluidity, transition and momentum are central to the architecture of Jean Nouvel. His work reflects Virilio’s statement that, “architecture is only a movie.” He designs knowing that architecture exists, like cinema, in the dimension of time and movement. “Film,” he says, has taught architects “to think in sequence.” Nouvel’s architecture plays with the notion of spatial transparency, seen clearly in his Cartier Foundation (1994). Visible from the street, the expanse of glass is bathed in a radiant glow, reflecting and refracting light. The building’s envelope invites an ambiguous perception in the observer. One can see the reflections of the surrounding trees on its façade and straight through the building to the other side at the same time. This effect mimics filmic superimposition, blurring the boundary between inside and outside, reality and illusion. The transparent volumes cinematically present the structure’s depth in the same way a long shot frames a space.

Jean Nouvel’s Fondation Cartier, 1994

Located in a park and surrounded by trees, the building plays a game of reflections in which it appears to blend with the surrounding greenery. The overlaying of exterior reflections on the façade with views within the building is analogous to the cinematic dissolve – its continual transitions from one image to another occurring on and beyond its surface.

OMA founder, Rem Koolhaas is another contemporary architect whose work can be read as a plot waiting to happen. Starting his career as a screenwriter, co-writing the Dutch film noir, The White Slave (1969), he sets up spatial sequences in his buildings through montage and suspense. His son, director Tomas Koolhaas, says: “If you listen to how my father talks about his architecture, he uses the word ‘scenario’ a lot, which means script in Dutch.”

Despite its title, Koolhaas junior’s latest film, REM (2016) places his father in a peripheral role. The film follows the architect jet-setting between continents, documenting life inside his buildings. Instead of depicting The Seattle Library (2004) as a sculptural icon devoid of human interaction – unlike how it’s often photographed – the film explores the connection between the library and its community of homeless inhabitants.

Interview with man residing in Seattle Library. Scene from REM, 2016

REM also sees filmmaker Louise Lemoine of Living Architectures give a personal account of living in Maison Bordeaux (1998); the focal point of her film, Koolhaas Houselife (2008, below). Although it’s about “one of the masterpieces of contemporary architecture,” the documentary exposes the house in all its defective glory, following the housekeeper as she begrudgingly goes about her daily chores.

REM brings the human back into architectural representation by exposing what architecture means to those who inhabit it, uncovering an architecture that’s infinitely more meaningful than its iconicity. Once again, it’s the art form of film that unearths meaning within spatial experience.

Both filmmaker and architect are the auteur, defining space and influencing the way in which we understand the cinematic qualities of architecture. Here, a boundless number of things are expressed – all the infinite things that can never be expressed with words.

Rem Koolhaas, REM, 2016

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