#about my madd

[silvermoon424]

[l0stfoster]

You guys are liking the Darry drawing and I feel nice SNEAK PEAKS‼️‼️

20 years old, parents assumedly died on/around his birthday (thank you musical for that one). How do I be normal about him.

I have a birthday angst post in mind for him LMAO.

Ignore the really shitty wip last frame I have the entire like, last 50 seconds of this song to draw stuff for

Formatting the shit for a TikTok too, won’t be posted as a comic but prolly a video w/ stills later

[gonnaeatyourgirlfriend]

remembered i ended up as a maladaptive daydreamer because i was so lonely as a kid. and we are still here. sigh

[bonefall]

Hi!

I’m not trying to be rude, this is just a genuine question and I’m curious. Why do you use xey/xem instead of they/them for nonbinary/gender-neutral characters? I’m only wondering because I personally use they/them, and hadn’t heard of xey/xem before.

Thank you!

Xey/xem is a set of neopronouns! Some people choose to use certain sets of nonstandard pronouns for themselves for various reasons. I've made a conscious choice to use them more often in the past year or so, some people in the audience really appreciate it.

Some reasons that people use neos;

Their preferred language doesn't have a genderless pronoun like English's they/them

They feel it fits their unique experience with gender better than they/them

Making a statement; I've seen some it/its users who argue they want to "reclaim" it since it's often used to dehumanize queer people.

It's Just Cool. Some people just like doing stuff because it's interesting.

For BB though, I use xey/xem for Gib/Meewa cats, which is a BB!Clan Cultural third gender next to Tom and Molly. The language they speak, Clanmew, doesn't have gender-based pronouns at all. The Meewa gender is not gender-neutral, so in translating it to English, I feel it would actually be most accurate to refer to them with a neo set and not with exclusive they/them.

They might be non"binary" by our standards; but gibs have their own set of gender expectations and a role within the Clan. Their gender is trinary, so queer cats in this narrative are non-trinary. Gender is a social construct, so fantasy cultures that have a very different idea of it tend to fascinate me.

Tossed it in for funsies, but it gives me a chance to chat about gender and such now and then. Welcome to Bonefall's Gender Shop where I will blast you with chemicals so intense your frogs will turn gay or your MONEY BACK

[oddozz]

Of course Arthur Lester is the leader of the random body parts church. Of course he is. Wouldn't be proper otherwise

[amateur-madder]

This post has probably been made before but it's 2 am and I've been thinking™:

But like it's so depressing, as a maladaptive daydreamer, that my perfect world, filled with the people I care about the most, only exists within my mind. I'm at the level of maladaptive where I don't really desire social contact because I have daydreaming and that fills all my social needs. But that life isn't real and it'll never be real no matter how much I want it to.

I'm not (actively) suicidal but when the thing you yearn for the most is something you can never interact with because it only exists in your head :/ it's hard to exist normally.

[dukeofthomas]

The Jason Todd brainrot is real cause when I woke up today I spent an extra hour just lying in my bed and vividly daydreaming about Jason going to therapy

[theinsomniacindian]

Do any of you ever have subpar day dreams that you don't even feel like investing any energy in but for some inexplicable reason, you continue to add to their plot

[laniemae]

OMG OJIMA THOUGHTS (rn mine are all just “AHHHHHHHHH”

ID LOVE TO HEAR YOURS

OJIMAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Hmm my thoughts I have so many thoughts about Ojima that it’s impossible to properly convey all at them at once so I’ll just go over what I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my thoughts on his maladaptive daydreaming.

So I feel like there hasn’t been enough discussion on Ojima’s maladaptive daydreaming despite it being really important to his character. And there’s a lot we still really don’t know about his daydreaming which I hope to be further expanded upon in the story or an interview. One of the things I think about a lot is what type of paracosm (daydream world) Ojima has in particular. And I think back to one scene in chapter 1 where everyone was discussing about how to get up to the vent with Ojima suggesting fantastical ideas such as a grappling hook and flying while he was out of it. Which could make me think it could be a childish world in nature especially with him being a children’s illustrator, perhaps drawing inspired from his daydreams. And how it’s said in the secret logs that he draws out his daydreams all over the walls of his room.

Something I really wanna know is what person Ojima is in his daydreams. Like maladaptive daydreamers aren’t always themselves in their daydreams, they can take on perspectives of characters that aren’t them, sometimes switching between multiple. Being an idealised version of themselves, a spectator watching the events or something else. And I think it’d be really interesting to figure out this specifically with Ojima as we still don’t exactly know too much on how he views himself as a person.

It seems Ojima’s main trigger for daydreaming is stress, said so in his interview in the prologue, but he also says that he just likes to do it. And from what we’ve seen as Ojima tends to space out and have trouble staying grounded when stressful things are bought up with him such as his parents and the killing game, probably either being typical dissociation or slipping into his daydreams. And as well we’ve seen him completely black out for hours after witnessing the deaths and being completely unresponsive to everything.

And the nature of his daydreams are quite interesting as sometimes in real life people may pace around or do certain things while daydreaming but in Ojima’s case he is completely still. But still able to perform motor actions such as walking when Hiroaki was guiding him throughout the 2nd investigation. And as well specifically after traumatic occurrences such as witnessing Sasaki and Chiba’s deaths he becomes unresponsive for hours at a time, despite peoples attempts to bring him back.

It’s also interesting with how in the 3rd investigation we properly were able to see how badly Ojima takes it when he forces himself not to dissociate, especially after the fight with Hiroaki when he blamed him for ruining all the investigations. And with tactical retreat Ojima broke down crying just showing how mentally challenging it is for him to not daydream at the presence of a highly stressful situation. Especially with his daydreaming being a trauma response and he had to survive by retreating into his mind into kinder worlds where he can feel safe. And the absence of being able to daydream is especially stressful to him.

But even with all this we’ve seen how much Ojima’s daydreaming can impact his life. As he misses and doesn’t remember entire days when he spends daydreaming. And even how he can’t control it and misses important deadlines and stuff he does want to be present for. And has been struggling at school with his grades declining and even spacing out and going missing. One thing particularly notable is from how in two truths and a lie when we learned that Ojima has broken a ton of bones, it seems to imply that could be a result of his daydreaming. As when spaced out he’s completely unaware of his surroundings which has seem to have gotten him into a lot of accidents and severe injuries, and how he said that he can’t even drive because of this.

It’s kinda a situation where Ojima has become dependent and essentially addicted to daydreaming. As it gives him a relief from stress and a safe space he can retreat to in his mind. But it interferes with his life heavily by impacting his school and work lives and even seems to have lead him getting injured a lot. And this all developed from his abusive childhood where completely detaching from a traumatic reality and into an innocent daydream world was the only way he could survive.

[fuckfuckgoback]

daydreaming with existing characters is so embarrassing. yeah I have all these headcanons but only for like one specific "fanfic" I haven't written. no theyre not interesting. no you cannot hear about them. no I am not going to write that "fanfic"

[novacomics]

"its just a album" to YOU maybe, i absorbed it into my soul

[ikeepforgettimypassword]

NO ONE TALK TO ME

IM GONNA BE THINKING OUT THIS FOR THE REST OF THE DAY

[kitkat-dreams]

Does anyone else have to ban themselves from consuming disaster/horror/generally fucked up situations in media because your brain goes "okay but what if that was you" and then the following daydream is so vivid its 30 minutes later and you didn't realize youre crying

[everyone-with-a-para]

I love that I never specify which paracosms my paras are from on here. Yeah I've tagged Error and Bart next to each other, no their worlds are nothing alike and impossible to compare, yes they've both experienced The Void Between Universes, no this does not connect them in any way but I'm not gonna tell you that they have nothing to do with each other

Anyway shout out to the paras that have experienced The Void Between Universes

[eosofspades]

hold me (my love is sick) (always) let me go (it leaks and bleeds) (always) (all over me onto you) nobody warned me it'd hurt so bad (twisted thing) (something pretty for the ruin and the rot) loving again when i thought you had me (an end to you and me) i'd do anything anything anything (oh, my mistake) (you loved me) maybe i'm the fool for thinking i can still love someone else

[acircusfullofdemons]

sometimes I will see slightly incorrect info in the madd tags and I have to resist the urge to correct them bc I don't wanna be That Person but also. I do. I wanna be That Person sssoooo bad.