#aaaand now… I’m tired.

[floral-hex]

Had my first therapy session today. The counselor was super nice and cool, so I’m hopeful.

[prettyboysmlm]

schools goin great :)

[gyuwoncheol]

Down Bad

Pair: Mingyu x f!reader

Genre: fluff, inspired by soft Mingyu during that GyuHan live

Summary: Clingy, lovesick Mingyu just wants your undivided attention

Warnings: tipsy! Gyu, mentions of alcohol, use of pet names, so much fluff, barely proofread

WC: 1.7k

Author's Note: look at me actually publishing something. This is once again very self-indulgent because Gyu was just so so adorable in that live and it had me in shambles. Shoutout to my sweet Cherry @shuadotcom for listening to me fawn over Mingyu when this live happened and building ideas of the scenes with me! I love you darling!

Author’s Note 2.0: LISTEN, SHORT HAIR MINGYU IS HANDSOME OKAY. I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY SOME DON’T LIKE IT ON HIM??? LIKE BRO GET YOUR EYES CHECKED. But seriously, it does kill me when I watch Gyu kinda second guess his new hairstyle. Like I know he just laughs it off most times, but I hope the self doubt doesn’t eat him up. I will die defending his short hair. idc.

“Is it bad?” You grimace as soon as Seungcheol releases you from his hug and leads you through the hall.

Cheol laughs, “well…” he stops walking to look at you, “he’s not drunk… yet. But he did get tipsy quite fast.”

“That’s cause he’s also tired,” you reasoned, “but thanks for calling me, I don’t think I’d want him to drive home by himself and—“

“Oh no no,” the leader interrupts, resuming his steps towards the dining area where you could already faintly hear your boyfriend whining, “he asked us to call you. Besides, you know that if he did get drunk, I’d force him to crash here.”

“Oh.”

“Babyyyy!” Mingyu shoots up from his seat and rushes to you with arms wife open when you surface in the room. He was beaming at the sight of you, puppy senses fully kicking in. A faint smell of alcohol and his cologne hits your nose when he bends down and engulfs you in a hug, his face nuzzling deep into your neck.

“Miss you,” he mumbles with a tight squeeze and you run your fingers through his short locks.

“Missed you too, bub. Should we get you home?”

Mingyu pulls you off him to hold you by your shoulders, his lips pursed and eyebrows scrunching, “no no, not yet. Comeeee, join usssss.”

You’re dragged by your tall boyfriend to the dining table, both Seungcheol and Jeonghan giggling but also sending you an apologetic look for the state that Mingyu is in.

“What are we doing?” You question when he offers you chopsticks and shows you all the food on the table.

“We’re celebrating Minghao’s birthday so we have to stay first, okay?” Seungcheol laughs at your boyfriend’s justification.

“Aaaand Hao is where exactly?”

Mingyu shrugs, “dunno. But that’s okay, we called him awhile ago already and we even sang for him on live. Do you want a drink?”

You reach out to stop his hands from pouring the alcohol on the glass, “no i’m good.” He looks at you intently and then decides against convincing you to drink. Instead, he sits back down and wraps his arms around your waist, sighing softly when his head rests on your shoulder.

“You okay, my love?” You ask after kissing the top of his head. “Tired?” He nods against your shoulder and hum an affirmative. “Maybe we should go—“

“Noooo,” your gentle giant whines, a full pout on his lips, making both his hyungs laugh at him.

“Okay, okay.”

“We’re still having fun… well, they’re having fun,” Mingyu gestures towards his two older members with scrunched brows.

You reach your arm up to touch his cheek, caressing his soft skin, “And you’re not?”

“They’re making fun of me.”

“We are not!” Seungcheol denies with a laugh.

“You laughed when the fans called me a potato on live.” The two boys start giggling again, recalling the conversation on the many forms of potatoes Mingyu could represent.

“I also said you were handsome with your short hair,” Cheol added, “the potato comment is just funny!”

Jeonghan, who was seated on Mingyu’s other side, now pokes at your boyfriend’s fingers before snorting with a laugh, “heh. french fries.”

Seungcheol and Jeonghan erupt in laughter much to Mingyu’s chagrin, and you yourself couldn’t help but giggle at the antics of the two boys. Mingyu crosses his arms defiantly, sulking like there’s no tomorrow.

“Oh cmon, Gyu, it’s funny!” The group’s resident trickster calls out.

“Babyyyyyy, protect meeee,” your boyfriend whines, hiding his face on your shoulder. Mingyu was no stranger to being teased by his members, and almost always, he’s a very good sport at taking it all in and staying calm and collected. But the facade easily drops the moment you’re around. He gets to be his true self, a big baby. Your big baby. Luckily for him, the boys listen to you.

“Okay, cut it out, guys,” you call, earning a smile from your boyfriend which immediately drops the next second when you say, “the potato is sad.”

“HEY!” Mingyu’s bottom lip juts out as he scowls at you, not at all impressed by your joke. You leave a kiss on his lips and he tries hard to hide the smile.

“I’m kidding, I don’t even know why they think that. You’re my puppy,” you quickly correct, cupping his cheeks and pecking his lips, “my handsome puppy.” That was enough to have your boyfriend unravel his arms and wrap them around your waist, a huge smile on his face as he leans on your shoulder. He was flustered beyond words. If there was one thing Mingyu agreed on, it’s that he was a puppy.

“You’re so whipped,” Jeonghan states the obvious and while you knew it was directed to your boyfriend, it also felt like it was a jab at you. Eitherway, neither you nor Mingyu denied it. Especially Mingyu. He was deeply in love with you and it was written all over his face.

You settle in nicely to a conversation with the boys, discussing the new cafe that just opened near the Hybe building and talking about the recent broadcast shows they’ve done for the comeback.

With each passing minute, the more Mingyu clings onto you like a koala. Mostly smiling and staring at you with lovestruck eyes that would immediately change into a silly face if you looked back at him. Eventually, his head constantly leaned on your shoulder or his face buried in your neck, relishing in the way your hand would subconciously reach up to run your fingers through his hair or scratch lightly at his scalp. You really loved his shorter hairdo, never missing a chance to compliment him about it. When he had cut his hair, he worried you’d stop running your fingers through them, which is why moments like these, even with his shorter strands, always made him sigh in content.

“What’s wrong?” You quiz when he pulls on your shirt sleeve after you laugh at one of Jeonghan’s jokes, your hands detaching from his hair to give the older member a high five. When you look at Mingyu, his eyes were even more half lidded than earlier, and the bags underneath a little more red and puffy.

“Nothin’,” he feigns but you know what he wants.

“Hmm… you sure you just don’t want my whole attention?” Mingyu scrunches his face in shock, like he’s trying to deny the way you just exposed him. But he doesn’t say anything, and instead, juts out his lower lip for his biggest pout of the night.

You decide to tease him a little bit more and roll your eyes playfully, putting your attention back to two of his brothers who were currently going through funny videos of Minghao.

Mingyu huffs loudly and tugs you closer to him, earning a giggle from you. “Okay big boy, I was only kidding, you have my attention,” he tries to maintain his sulking but fails badly when his lips quirk into a smile after you plant a kiss on them.

“I love you,” he whispers, blushing wildly at his own confession and hiding behind your shoulder blades.

“I love you too, Gyu. But can I bring you home now? You look like you’re about to fall asleep any minute.”

“Nooooo,” Mingyu whines loudly.

You were about to reason but Seungcheol beats you to it, “Mingoo, my hyung’s about to come home now. You guys have to leave soon.”

“See, baby? Cheol needs us out of the house.”

“That’s rude,” he complains, “but his hyung likes me. We can stay.”

You flash Cheol an apologetic look, letting him know you got it under control. Just then, you stand up and bend down to cup Mingyu’s face, forcing him to look at you. “Baby, we have to go. If you fall asleep on me here, you bet I won’t be carrying you home. So choose, big guy, do you want to be beside me in bed tonight? Or beside Seungch—“

“OKAY! BYE HYUNGS!” The 6 foot 2 man shoots up from his chair in full height, not even giving you enough time to process things before he’s pulling at your hand and dragging you out of the dining room, “We’re going. Thank you for the food, Coups hyung!”

“YAH!” Jeonghan scolds, “you said you would bring me home!”

[princessbrunette]

so we all know pope is usually all nice and gentle and sweet and blahblah- buuuuuut do you think he ever drops the nice guy act and gets mean, like when he's tired or he's arguing with reader or sum

new here btw, can i be 💐 anon?:)

♡ﾐ・◦・ﾐ💗☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩🎀

oh yeah, he can be kind of snarky lowkey. in my opinion he gets pretty passive aggressive sometimes if he’s stressed or if he feels slighted by the people around him. he tries not to be that way with you, which occasionally means he takes it in the opposite direction and just snaps at you. this happens mostly when he feels like you put yourself in danger for no reason, or trusted another member of the groups word over his.

the group would be loading up the boat, getting ready to depart after a long day of running about and getting yourselves in trouble. you weren’t supposed to be with them, because pope hated putting you in danger — but now you’d thrust yourself head first into all the shenanigans and it was increasingly bothering him.

“where are we going next?” you grin, finally placing your attention on your boyfriend as he works on the bow line, not even turning his head to glance at you.

“home.” he deadpans, thick arms working at the rope and reeling it up into his grip as it becomes undone. you furrow your brows, coming to his side — still full of energy and adrenaline.

“but john b said we had to go and find—”

it’s then he turns around, voice raised just a tad as he stares down at you. “no, you’re going home. we’re finishing what we started. you weren’t even supposed to be here.” it’s a short and sudden explosion, and he does infact feel bad when he watches your face slowly fall, heart heavy with the new realisation that pope didn’t want you there. he lowers his tone, purposely backing up to seem less imposing. “go… help kie on the deck.” he’s quieter, and you nod— not wanting to take any more of his time.

he sighs, pushing his palms into his eyes as he inwardly cusses himself out for being so mean to you. his blonde best friend comes rumbling down the steps to the boat, slowing his roll when he notices pope in distress.

“you good?”

“no. i was just unnecessarily mean.”

“to your girl? why, man?” jj approaches, perching on the side of the boat as pope stares over at the pier, squinting in the afternoon sun.

“because i’m an idiot.”

“yeah, well. been there, brother. just… make it right. she’ll be fine.” he pats his back, departing.

when the pogues drop you home, you don’t have much to say. avoiding pope all together as you offer them a small smile and climb off, clutching the arms of your backpack tight with clammy hands to stop from crying.

it’s around 11PM when they finish up doing what needs to be done. pope arrives at your door with a bouquet of flowers he purchased from the gas station and a guilty smile.

“so, i’m a dick… aaaand, i feel like i owe you a big explanation. may i come in?”

♡ﾐ・◦・ﾐ💗☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩🎀

[addie4ddie2005]

THE NEW CHAPTER IS SO AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVGDFCHBVKDSVBKHFBJLSVBJLSSJLVBSLJBVLS🦅🦅🦅🦅💥💥💥💥 GOOD FKN SOUP IM DEVOURING IT RN it might be my fav chapter thus far........It has elements of The horrors tm and scenes that make me kick my feet in delight GODDDDDD🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 AAAAnd as usual I have some new silly doodles that I've got (Sadly I cant draw fast enough to finish my fan art for this chapter BUTIMWORKINGONSMT). I do have the RGB reader designs that I mainly use so that other fans could (maybe....just maybe...) mold their reader/player into whatever they want but I DO have a design that caters to my fav design tropes...

ALSOALSO- I've got a folder righttt 👉here where I'll compile some more sketches (and the animation with the right sync good gracious me-) so that I dont BOMBARD you with 50plus images.

the last "AGAIN"- THE CHAPTER WAS SO SCRUMPTIOSSSSSSS- KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you I'm so glad you love it!! 🦅💥 (Nonsense emojis are becoming a habit I have to stoppp...)

It's so funny you said that cuz I have a Doc called "kicking my feet blushing giggleinf" that I use to jot down the "fluffy" moments when the inspiration worms hit x0

And take your time with the art gurl!! What you've already done is amazing!! The most important thing is that it's fun and engaging for you,, no pressure 🫶

Those RGB designs are a banger btw they have so much personality!! I forgot to mention I loved the color scheme of your animation. I'm a sucker for some super saturated RGB...

OKAY now I'm gonna gush abt your art >:o] I love your insert she's too spunky!! She looks so done w him LOL. Also your style is delightful and fun!! I love your habit of drawing ppl with tired eyes and no mouth. It speaks to me.

The “You look lonely” piece is gorgeous btw :) He’s so shinyyy,, Insert looks tireddd. I know it’s the meme format or whatevah but I would be too.

I hope you don’t mind me sharing screenshots? Just let me know :o) I’m abt to holler abt some sketches.

THESE!! These made me so soft oml. I know in my heart he feels like a Squishmallow or whatever those fat chibi stuffed animals are.

DRIP KINITO 🔥🔥🔥 I giggled. Also baseball Kinito is canon now. To me. I just KNOW he picks up random human sports and tries his darndest to play them with only two people. (Reader cheering him on and also looking thoroughly depressed is so real LMAO)

I think that's all I have in my heart for now... TY for this plethora of art you went above and beyond <3

BTW I’m gonna provide a pic of the players here for easy viewing cuz they’re cool as freak 💯🐊

EDIT: I am so glad!! You love my fic!! I heart U!!

[glo0b]

Cuddles with a croc

I do not own the art or characters

whom: Sebek x gn!reader

TW: nsfw? if you squint hard enough

word count: 791

request: He gets turned into a camen in alchemy class, we’re one of only 3 responsible-ish people on campus, so crewl has us watch him, but doesn’t tell us what’s going on cuz he’s in a hurry. Croc in a blanket burrito, lots of Steve Irwin behavior from us and lots of kisses on the snoot, crewl takes croc back, Sebek now  gets quiet and turns bright red when we’re around lol

Thank you lovely @anunholyabomination for requesting this! I hope you like it since it's my first time writing a fanfic lol. Remember to drink lots of water and get lots of sleep so you can stay beautiful you!

================================================

It was any normal day in Alchemy class with Sebek. He was yelling at his poor partner for being an idiot and putting the wrong ingredient into the transformation potion till thick green smoke started to form. “HUMAN! WHY ARE YOU BAC-” Before poor Sebek could possibly continue destroying his classmates' ears the caldron explodes, covering the room in the thick green smoke. Slowly the smoke clears revealing a small caiman sitting where Sebek should have been standing.

Here you were peacefully sitting in Ramshackle relaxing on your very much needed day off when you heard a knock at the door. You gently move Grim off of your chest, careful not to wake the sleeping cat thing. You still had no idea what kind of species to identify Grim as. He could be a feline- aaaand now the knocking on the door is even louder and frantic. “Coming! Hold on!” You quickly responded as you rushed to open the door. You opened the door to reveal an equally tired looking Crewel holding a bundled up blanket that seemed to be emitting chirping like sounds…wait was that a caiman?! “Here pup, take care of him for me” Crewel simply shoved the bundled up caiman into your arms and leaves.

“But I don’t- sigh well I guess I’m gonna have to figure out how to take care of you myself.” You look down at the small caiman and coo at its cute little face. “Awww, you’re just a little guy~ Oh! I should totally give you a cute name to fit that little face!”. Poor Sebek, now he has to be cuddled by this human! Well maybe the cuddles won't be that bad. “Hmmm, y’know you remind me a lot of friends….plus you’re just as cute as him!” The caiman looks up at you as if he understood who you were talking about. “Your name should be like his, what about Seby?” Yuu looked into the caiman’s eyes and understood it didn’t seem to enjoy the name. “Don’t judge me! I’m bad at names…” You pout, trying to think of a name the small creature would enjoy. “What about Sebok then?” The caiman moves its head as if it was nodding. “Sebok it is!” You held Sebok close and kissed his little snoot. You had put Sebok on the couch and wrapped him up in more blankets so he would stay warm since you remembered how an Australian guy on tv had said caiman have to stay at least around 97 degrees and no more than 104 degrees. “I wonder how a caiman possibly got into NRC especially when it feels like the dead of winter out there.” You look down at Sebok and giggle when he starts to make the same chirping like sound from earlier. “I really should send a picture of your cute little face to Sebek, you’re just too adorable!” You lean down and start kissing Sebok’s little head while making exaggerated kissing sounds. Thankfully Grim was still asleep so he couldn’t see this disgustingly sweet action and get jealous. Sebok didn’t seem to mind the kisses that much, he actually seemed to enjoy them. 

A few hours passed of you showering Sebok in kisses and cuddles. “Oh my! It’s already past twelve!” You quickly pick up Sebok and the somehow still sleeping Grim and head upstairs to your room. You placed both Grim and Sebok on the bed before looking through your dresser to find some sleepwear. You start to undress and take off your undergarments so you could put on clean ones. Once you finish changing you turn around and find Sebok frozen in place. “Oh? Are you ok little one? Are you cold?” You sit down on the bed and put Sebok in your lap. “I’ll warm you up” You smile as Sebok nuzzles into your body and slowly starts to drift off. When the small caiman finally falls into a slumber you pull the covers over the two of you and slowly start to fall asleep yourself.

It has been a week since Crewel had taken Sebok from you. Even though you only took care of the caiman for a day you felt really attached to him. You also noticed how Sebek would blush when he was near you. The poor thing would always storm off while hiding his boner. Perhaps one of these days he would get rid of this burden by telling you how he feels….well of course after he’s had some fun with you in the janitor's closet or an empty classroom. If not Lilia will have to intervene so he can get the grandchildren he wants. Hm? Why did you get an invitation from Sebek to come have tea at Diasomnia?

[yougavemeyourheartyouknow]

Love me or hate me, both are in my favor (Miguel O’Hara x Fem! Reader [HS Academic Rivals AU])

Y’all ready for Miguel to finally kiss (Y/N)’s ass??!?!?!? Not proofread enjoy lol, I had a lot of fun writing this. I tried to be a bit artsy near the end it it’s too cringe I’ll probably delete it and redo it lmao.

Cursing, Miguel finally getting his shit together, lol he’s ooc but it’s okayyy lol

(Y/N)- Your name, (L/N)-Last name, (N/N)-Nickname.

Word count: 2.1k

Series Masterlist Series Playlist

Chapter 12: What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way

—

You hated to admit it, but you kind of missed throwing away those stupid little apology notes from Miguel. Oddly enough, they had stopped appearing on your desk the day after your last little “date” with Spider-Man. Though you doubt there was any correlation, you couldn’t help but wonder why all of a sudden he would stop after what was about two or three weeks of nothing but notes after notes of apologies.

“He probably realized that you aren’t going to forgive him and decided to finally give up.” Mj’s voice sounded through your phone speaker, lying next to you as you laid on your stomach on top of your bed. Checking over your new manicure you had just received that morning, before letting out a huff as you dramatically dropped your head down on the mattress.

“Can we stop bringing him up? I don’t need reminders of his existence, not like I didn’t have enough reminders before…” You grumbled, you're sure if she was there with you she’d roll her eyes at your theatrics.

“I feel like we talk too much about you two.” She teased, the end of her sentence trailing off in a chuckle.

“Yeah because now that you're dating Peter, I can’t tease you about how you act like a nervous wreck around him anymore.” You shot back, picking your head back up and raising your brow, your smirk evident in your tone.

“Don’t be bitter that I got a boyfriend before (N/N), I’m sure spidey will ask you soon enough.” Your cheeks flared as your best friend tease, despite you starting it first you couldn’t help but feel yourself becoming a bit more shy at the mention of Spider-Man. You know not to take it to heart though as you let out a small laugh.

“Hey aren’t you supposed to be getting ready for that date right now.” You point out, having remembered that she mentioned to you during your last class together that Peter was planning on taking her to some movie after his photography club.

“Oh shit- you’re right! I got to go, I’ll text you later!”

“Okay bye have fu-aaaand she hung up, welp.” You drop your head on your bed once more after grabbing your pillow to place underneath you. Deciding taking a nap would be better than spending the next few hours doing something else, too tired from school to even attempt to watch a movie or tv show, let alone read or do homework. A sigh escapes through your nose, closing your eyes as you snuggle against the pillow, waiting to succumb to your own exhaustion. The white noise of your air conditioner running in the background lulling you to sleep.

—

“Maybe this is too on the nose…” Miguel mumbled to himself as he glanced down to the wrapped item in his hands, trying to compose himself as he stands in front of your dorm room, gathering the courage to knock.

It was almost embarrassing, that he was going to grovel at your doorstep in order to get you to even look at him again. He was already bruising his ego enough with the countless apology notes that you didn’t even bother to glance at for longer than a second before tossing them, let alone read. Still despite his… complicated feelings towards you, he’d rather you bruise his ego then anyone else.

His eyes came back to stare at your room number that was etched into your door, before nervously shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

You were a smart girl, a very smart girl. Miguel knew that. So he knew he was potentially playing with fire with his apology gift, he knew more than anyone else how your brain worked, he knew that you could take one glance at it and all the pieces would fall in place. He just hoped that for one, he would wave away any suspicions that you might come up with. Worst case scenario you outright declare him as Spider-Man, but then what? You weren’t one to tell secrets, you weren’t money or fame hungry so you weren’t going to go off and tell the media for a check.

Miguel shook his head, trying to shake away all the possibilities that were now coming to the forefront of his mind. Close his eyes to take in deep breath before opening to them once again to stare at your door.

‘If I keep thinking about it, I’ll end up walking away, just knock damnit.’

Finally, with a sharp exhale through his nostrils, he brings up his enclosed fist to tap lightly on your door. The edge of lips pulling downward after not getting any confirmation that you heard his knocking. After another louder knock, his ears finally picking up the faintest of annoyed groans, making his tensed shoulders slip down just a few centimeters.

Miguel thanked whatever dumb constructor decided to not give the ancient dorm building doors peepholes, because if they did, he knew you wouldn’t have opened the door for him. That’s why he stuck his foot out to act as a stopper, preventing you from closing it in his face once you realized who had decided to interrupt your short lived nap.

What a relief to be able to see your face up close with the mask on to counsel his. Despite the fact that your fake polite smile quickly melted away from your face once you realized who was at your doorstep, leaving a scowl to come and take its place. Miguel barely had time to open his mouth before your frame was once again covered by the wooden door, his school assigned leather shoes certainly getting scuffed from it hitting the side of them. Not even wincing as you attempted to push his foot out with resting your weight against the door.

“(L/N), Come on. It’s been weeks, you can’t keep ignoring me. Just… I-I know I fucked up okay? You were trying to be civil with me and I… Look I’m sorry okay? I’m sorry.” His free hand came up and pushed against the door lightly, not enough to knock you off your balance or anything but enough to peak his head through the door to meet your glare once more. “You know more than anyone else that I don’t do serious apologies. Just hear me out. You’ve-You’ve already got me begging here (L/N), to just be in the same room with you so I can admit I’m an asshole. You don’t have to forgive me, just hear me out! Please-“

He was able to squeeze himself through the crack of the door, closing it before him and leaning against it as he attempted to catch his breath from his babbling, chest raising up and down rapidly as his pleading eyes turned a bit more intense, you took a step back and crossed your arms over your chest, letting out an irritated huff as you kept your eyes on him.

“Get out O’Hara-“

“I’m tired of you ignoring me, what do you want me to do, huh!? You and I are too intertwined into each other’s lives for you to ignore me forever. You know that-“

“Unfortunately.” You grumbled under your breath, rolling your eyes a bit. Miguel, now standing up straight, took a step towards you, a hand flying to his chest as usually narrowed and bored eyes suddenly turned wild and frantic almost like a confused puppy.

“I-“ he paused, letting out a huff, before lowering his voice down to just above a whisper. “I’m not going to leave until you listen to me please just-“ He stutters, taking another pause as his eyes flutter shut tightly, you haven’t even noticed that his eyes were turning glossy and red until he opened them again, had you ever seen Miguel cry before? Well if you hadn’t, this might be a first for you both. “Please (Y/N).”

The use of the first name between you both was rare, you had been in more near death situations then you’ve heard your first name uttered from Miguel’s lips. So hearing it with such… desperation… it made your heart jump up to your throat. Your eyes never leaving his as he took another step towards you and… oh my god… is he kneeling?

“Please I-“ He choked out, the wetness that was threatening to spill out from the corner of his eye finally came down, his hands reached out to yours in desperation, you were too much in shock to think about pulling them away as you blinked down at him almost stupidly. “I can't… take it anymore. I feel like I’m going mad.”

He was being completely truthful with that statement too. He was jealous of his super powered alter ego from getting more attention from you then he was just as himself.

You finally pull yourself back into the current moment, clearing your throat as you shake yourself to help gather your words, neither of you noticing during the whole ordeal that Miguel’s apology gift had landed a few feet away from the door. Tugging at his hands as a signal to get up and off the floor. “O-okay, okay fine. Just-get up Miguel, Jesus…”

You wanted to keep holding onto this grudge of yours, but how could you when you had brought a man who is twice your size and four times your ego down to his knees? Reducing him to nothing more than a crying begging mess. Simple answer, you couldn’t. Whether it’s simple petty or if you felt like you were truly ready to hear him out, it honestly didn’t matter to you anymore. It’s clear from his breakdown that he had suffered enough.

He let out the biggest sigh of relief, sniffing a bit as he finally brought himself back up from your floor. A large hand of his coming up to wipe away a few lingering tears of frustration once he was up on his feet again. A silence fell over you both as you gave him a few seconds to collect himself properly before he could start explaining himself. Finally, with a clearing of his throat, bloodshot eyes met yours.

“Look, I know that… we haven’t been anything more than tolerant of each other… but I should have never,” his hands went to find yours again, grasping tightly as if he was afraid that you’d disappear in front of him. “Ever. Said that stuff to you. It was… too much even for us, if I could take it back, I would. I have no idea what snapped in my mind to say such vile things to you, it was wrong, it was stupid-so stupid-and I regret it. Regret it more than anything I’ve ever done in my life. You don’t have to forgive me, I don’t expect you to. Hell, say the word and I’ll walk out of here and I’ll disappear from your life forever. “

You have honestly never felt so speechless before. Miguel has never made you feel so speechless before.

“But god do I want you to forgive, to take those words back. I'll do anything, and when I tell you that I’ll do anything, I mean anything.”

You couldn’t help the breathless chuckle that escaped your throat, uneasiness bubbling up in your lower gult, despite laughing being your first reaction, you could tell he was all but joking. Your tongue stuck out to lick your suddenly dry lips.

“I can tell you’re being quite… erm, serious, so,” you pause, inhaling the tense air in hopes it’ll help calm your nerves, “I accept your apology.” Miguel took a deep breath to keep himself from turning into a babbling mess again, he could feel that heavy pressure on his chest filling up, he could finally breathe agai-“but I don’t forgive you.” He could feel his airways clog back up, he felt like he was blue screening as his ears heard the words but his mind didn’t want to accept it. He wants to do nothing more than to grovel at your feet again for you to take those words back.

But he couldn’t, it made him a little happier to know that there is something he can build off of, still as he finally was able to drag himself out from your room after putting on the facade of countenance , he felt the need to release all his pent up emotions out. He wanted to cry till his tear ducts stopped working, sob till his throat felt raw. But he couldn’t get himself to do it, his body simply wouldn’t let him, refusing to undo all of his years hiding his emotions more than he’s already done in your room, you're the only one who could make him feel again. What was that book his class started reading last week?

He felt like he had no mouth, and he had to scream.

—

Taglist: @famouscattale @strawberryjuice9 @loser-alert @maomaimao @franceseca-the-1st @mcmiracles @mangoslushcrush @queerponcho @yournextbimbogf @tinybirdhideout @oharasfilipinawife @mxltifxnd0m @homewreckingwreck @dumb-gemini @cowboylikeevie @thedevax @codenameredkrystalmatrix @reader-1290 @laysmt (to be added click here)

[aflame4goinghome]

Antithesis

j.t.k x reader & j.m.k. x reader

part II

word count: 7.5k

warnings: THIS STORY CONTAINS SMUT, MINORS DNI!! fluff, swearing, drinking, a little bit of name calling, cheating *kind of* SMUT: flirting, kissing, sexually implicit language, touching, dirty talk, slight voyeurism, fingering (f. receiving), oral sex (f. receiving & m. receiving), unprotected sex, biting, degradation kink if you squint, cum play (just a little bit, ok?)

a/n: aaaand i’m back! sorry that i’ve been gone so long… getting ready to graduate college is no joke! but i worked really hard on this one, so i hope you all enjoy :)

listen to the official playlist on Spotify here

read part one here

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It’s been a little over a week since your encounter with Jake, and it has yet to desert the back of your mind. It plagues you, like some sort of nightmare that you can’t seem to wake up from. Luckily for you, you haven’t had to see him too much since his party, since you and Josh had spent the Christmas holiday apart. The two of you were still a relatively new couple, if you could even call it that, and weren’t remotely serious enough to meet each other’s parents, at least in your opinion. He didn’t seem to mind too much, however, and he and his brothers went back to Michigan for the holiday. 

Despite the much-needed distance, your dilemma with Jake was still all you could think about. Every time you closed your eyes, all you could feel was Jake’s cold, calloused hands on your skin, giving you a feeling of euphoria that you had yet to experience before. And even if you wanted to forget about it (which you didn’t), it seems as though he won’t let you. Much to your surprise, you received a call from an unknown number late Christmas Eve after you’ve already tucked yourself into bed in your childhood bedroom at your parents’ house.

“Merry Christmas, sunshine.”

You swallow deeply. “Jake…?” You can practically hear the smirk in his voice as he replies, “The one and only.” His voice is deep and husky, slurring his words together slightly. You can tell that he’s had plenty to drink.

You roll your eyes and ask, “How did you get my number?” 

“I have my ways… A gentleman never reveals his secrets.” He utters, with confidence dripping off his words like honey. You scoff at him but say nothing. He speaks again, a bit more hushed than before.

“You been thinkin’ about me, baby? I know I’ve been thinkin’ about you.” The hoarseness of his voice on the other line is enough to make your knees buckle, but you’d never let him know that. 

“Definitely not,” you say, lying through your teeth. “You’re the last thing that would ever be on my mind, actually.” You hear him chuckle to himself.

“Yeah? Thinkin’ about my brother, then?” he jests, seeing right through you.

“And what if I am?” you reply, refusing to back down.

“He can’t handle you, sunshine. He doesn’t have it in him,” he says, and you can practically hear the annoyance in his voice.

“And you think you can? Is that it?” you scoff, starting to grow tired of his games.

“Why don’t you tell me? I seemed to handle you quite well the last time we saw each other, isn’t that right, sweetheart?” he says, his voice in almost a low whisper now. You’d be lying if you said that it didn’t affect you. You were under his spell, and he knew it.

“Goodnight, Jake,” you reply, a smile apparent in your voice, then hang up the phone. You stare at his phone number for a moment before creating a new contact, naming it “Bane Of My Existence,” then close your phone, set it on your bedside table, and go to sleep.

That was a week ago, and you’ve been able to avoid your dilemma since then. But now, with New Year's Eve tonight, they’ve all returned for a “night of revelry,” as Josh called it. As excited as you are to spend New Year’s Eve with Josh, you’re fearful of what’s to come if you find yourself alone with Jake again. You hope that it won’t get to that point, and you’re going to do your best to avoid it at all costs.

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Luckily, Josh was hosting the party this time, which made you feel slightly less nervous. He got home from his trip yesterday morning, so he took the two of you out on a date last night and you stayed over to help him prepare for the party. Even though you didn’t need to be there that early to set up, you enjoyed the excuse to spend some extra time alone with him. You hope that the more time you spend with Josh, the easier it will be to forget about your previous intoxicated lapse of judgment with his twin.

You wake up, rolling over in bed to face him, He’s still asleep, laying on his back with his hands on his chest, snoring ever-so-slightly. You know that the snoring is thanks to his very deviated septum, which he refuses to get surgery for. Josh told you that Jake had gotten his fixed last year and it got rid of his snoring completely. He won’t get it done, though- he’s convinced that it would “ruin his angelic singing voice.” You rolled your eyes at him that day, but it was something that you admired about him: his dedication to his art. 

Despite the band being Jake’s idea at the start, singing has slowly become Josh’s entire life, that much has been obvious to you. He puts his entire heart and soul into it, sometimes at the expense of his health and well-being. He tends to push himself too far, but in the past year, it’s clear that he’s learning from his mistakes. This new tour meant new beginnings and better habits for him, and you couldn’t be prouder.

You reach your hand over to him gently, pushing some of his curls back and out of his face. Josh’s eyes begin to flutter open and land on you as a smile creeps across his face.

“I could get used to this,” he mutters with a smirk, his voice sounding groggy after just waking up.

“Don’t get too comfortable now,” you joke, running your fingers through his hair as you gaze at him with a smile. 

“If you’re not careful, I just might,” he says, his smile widening as he begins to sit up. Your cheeks turn pink at his words and you try to look down to avoid any teasing. 

“So…” you say with a smile, “You wanna go get some coffee?”

“You read my mind, darling,” he says, leaning over and planting a soft kiss on your lips and grins. “I knew I kept you around for a reason.”

You roll your eyes and turn around to get out of bed, heading toward the bathroom to get ready for the day. But first, you turn around and quip back, “Because I always like to go get coffee? No other reasons?”

“Oh, I could list plenty of other reasons, lover…” he answers, walking toward you and wrapping his arms around your waist, pulling you closer. “Want me to show you?”

You swear your heart stopped right then and there. His eyes had darkened as he looked down at you with a smirk, and you could already feel his morning wood against your abdomen. No, no- you had to stay focused (for now). Your cheeks flush and you clear your throat, trying not to appear too flustered. “Coffee first,” you say, smiling softly as you meet his eyes before grabbing your overnight back from the floor and heading into the bathroom.

You quickly shut the door behind you and rest your back against it, taking in a deep breath. You were way in over your head with the Kiszkas, and you knew it. You take a look in the mirror, seeing how disheveled you looked from your night’s sleep. You’re not sure how Josh could still be attracted to you, even when you looked like such a mess, but you know the answer to that question was one that you’re not quite ready for yet.

You quickly brush your teeth and braid your hair loosely down your back, leaving out a few strands around your face. You take off Josh’s old Greta Van Fleet t-shirt that he gave you to sleep in last night and throw on your oversized college sweatshirt and a pair of light-colored jeans. When you go to open the bathroom door, Josh is sitting on the bed, waiting for you. He had put on his favorite Sherpa jacket and some khaki pants. He must have gone to get ready in the spare bathroom downstairs since his hair looked neat and his face was freshly washed. He turns his head as he hears the door open, smiling as he catches sight of you.

“There she is,” he says, standing up and walking over to you. You smile at him, holding his shirt in your hands.

“I should probably give this back…” you mutter, holding it out for him to take. Instead, he shakes his head and gently pushes your hand downward.

“Nuh-uh. That’s yours now,” he says with a proud smile. “It doesn’t fit me anymore. Besides, you look much better in it anyway.” You blush, meeting his gaze. “Okay.”

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Josh heads down the stairs and you follow closely after him, sliding on your sneakers before heading out the door toward his car. He unlocks the car with his keys and opens the door for you before rounding the car and getting into the driver’s seat. He turns the car on and the radio starts blaring, causing Josh to quickly hit the Bluetooth button on the screen.

“You wanna put something on?” he asks. You’ve been in his car plenty of times by now, but you’d never really had the opportunity to control the music before, as he usually would have something on before you got in the car. The corners of your lips turn into a small smile as you nod, connecting your phone to his car’s Bluetooth.

You decide to put on your 60s and 70s playlist, knowing that he’d probably enjoy anything that might come on from there. As the opening notes of a familiar song start to play as he pulls out of the driveway, you can already tell that your intuition was right.

You’re just too good to be true

Can’t take my eyes off of you

You’d be like Heaven to touch

I wanna hold you so much 

At long last love has arrived

And I thank God I’m alive

You’re just too good to be true

Can’t take my eyes off of you

A smirk appears on his lips as he looks over at you, clearly happy with your song choice. He nods his head along with a smile as he drives to your favorite coffee shop in downtown Nashville. As the next verse starts, though, he begins to sing along.

Pardon the way that I stare

There’s nothing to compare

The sight of you leaves me weak

There are no words left to speak

He turns his head to meet your gaze, winking at you before turning back to the road.

But if you feel like I feel

Please let me know that it’s real

You’re just too good to be true

Can’t take my eyes off of you

You giggle at his attempt at a serenade as the chorus gears up, deciding to join in with him. He places his right hand on your thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze as he smiles brightly, sneaking glances every chance he gets.

I love you, baby

And if it’s quite alright

I need you, baby

To warm a lonely night

I love you, baby

Trust me when I say

You can’t help but look at him with the biggest smile on your face. You knew then and there that if anyone knew you the best, it would be Josh. Despite whatever your romantic relationship was, this man is your best friend. He gets you more than anyone else does. You place your hand on his, which is still planted on your thigh. 

Oh, pretty baby

Don’t bring me down, I pray

Oh, pretty baby, now that I found you, stay

And let me love you, baby

Let me love you

You finally arrive at the coffee shop and pull into a parking space at the front. Josh puts the car in park and turns to notice that you’re already looking at him, smiling from ear to ear.

“What?” he asks, smiling at you.

“Nothing- just you,” you answer.

“You growing soft on me, darlin’?” he jokes, reaching over to brush some of your stray hairs behind your ear.

“Yeah, maybe I am,” you say, leaning into his hand as he strokes your cheek with his thumb. He smiles wide and brings your face to his, kissing you. You smile against his lips as he pulls you closer to him, brushing your tongue against his bottom lip as if to ask permission for its entry. He opens his mouth slightly, allowing your tongue to slip past his lips and meet his own, causing him to let out a low groan. Before you get the chance to pull him closer to you, he ends the kiss, keeping his face mere inches away from yours.

“If we keep going like that, then we’re not gonna make it inside that coffee shop, baby,” he whispers, stroking your cheek before turning to open his door, then going around the front of the car and opening yours. You try to get rid of the flush of your cheeks as you exit the car and enter the cafe, taking Josh’s hand in yours.

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You both got your coffee and then went to run some errands to get ready for this party. You stopped at the party store for some decorations, the grocery store for snacks and ingredients for appetizers, and the liquor store to get a few bottles of champagne and stock up on tequila. Before you know it, it’s nearly 5 p.m. and it’s time to start getting ready. Josh knew that it would take you a while, so he opted to shower first and then went downstairs to start cooking the famous dish that he makes for every party- jalapeño poppers with a secret dipping sauce that he won’t share with anyone, not even with you. Cooking skills are well beyond your expertise, so you just let him enjoy it on his own.

You finish up in the shower and wrap one of Josh’s soft, white towels around your body, tucking it in on the top corner. You tap your watch to check the time, which you left sitting on the counter, which reads 6:12 p.m. The guests are supposed to be arriving around 8, so you luckily have enough time for now, but Josh did warn you that his brothers will likely arrive early. You go to plug in your hair dryer, then begin drying your hair. Your mom had just gifted you one of those fancy hair dryers for Christmas that curls your hair as you dry it, and you finally have an excuse to test it out. 

After a while of drying, thanks to the thickness and length of your hair, you finally achieve the style you were hoping for, a blowout with a beautiful curl to it. You spray in a bit of hairspray, then start on your makeup. You lay on your base makeup and then add in some light silver eyeshadow, just enough to make your eyes sparkle. You apply eyeliner, just enough to line your eyes tightly, then put on a layer of mascara. You put on dark red lipstick then pick up your watch from the counter: 6:58 p.m. Still plenty of time to spare. You head out of the bathroom to get dressed. 

You walk to Josh’s closet to take your dress off its hanger. It was a tight silver sequined dress, hitting around the middle of your thighs. It has thin straps and a square neckline, which didn’t show too much cleavage but definitely didn’t leave that much to the imagination. You put it on, then slip on your black heels and go downstairs to find Josh.

You turn the corner at the bottom of the stairs and walk toward the kitchen. You see Josh in front of the oven, putting his jalapeño popper in to bake. He’s wearing a white sweater with a pair of gray dress pants and black loafers. As he hears the cadence of your heels, he turns around and leans his side against the counter, not taking his eyes off of you for a second as he watches you approach him. A smile spreads across his face as you get closer, then he reaches his arms out and places his hands on your waist, pulling you into him. 

“Oh, you look delicious, baby…” he says, capturing your lips in his. It’s quick and almost impatient- you can tell that you picked the right dress. With his hands still on your waist, he flips you both around so that your lower back rests against the kitchen counter. His hands slide down to grip your ass and he lets out a low groan as he pulls you closer to him. 

“I should cancel this party right now, keep you all to myself,” he mumbles as his lips start to pepper kisses along our jawline and down your neck. “It’s not too late, you know, I’ll call everyone right now…” You lean your head back as he continues his assault on your neck, a small whimper leaving your mouth as you feel him suck one of the sensitive spots on your skin. But unfortunately for you, amidst your heated interaction with Josh, neither of you heard the front door swing open.

“It seems like I might be interrupting something,” you hear a deep voice say from behind Josh. You sigh as Josh frantically lets go of you and turns around to see none other than his twin brother staring back at him with a smirk spread across his face.

You feel your breath catch in your chest as you see Jake standing at the kitchen's threshold. His eyes are hidden underneath his usual dark sunglasses, but you know they’re locked on you- you can feel it. You take a moment to watch him as Josh walks over to greet him. He’s wearing a pair of black dress pants paired with his usual black Chelsea boots. On top, he’s opted for a dark red button-up, with a few buttons undone at the top as always, and the sleeves are rolled up just below his elbows. 

You hear Sam and Danny walk in through the front door, and Josh goes to greet them in the foyer. It sounds like they ask him to help carry in snacks and drinks from the car. They all exit the house, leaving just you and Jake in the kitchen. You watch as he takes his sunglasses off and slips them into the small pocket in his shirt, his eyes still locked with yours. Suddenly, as he goes to approach you, they seem to wander downward, taking in every inch of you before he’s only less than a foot away and meets your gaze once again.

“At this point, I have no choice but to think that you must be doing this on purpose,” he says, leaning his arm onto the counter next to you, allowing his left hand to ghost slightly over your arm. 

Your eyes go from where his hand nearly connects with your skin, then up to meet his eyes. “Doing what?” you ask, feigning innocence.

“You know exactly what… You wear that little number just for me, sweetheart?” he says, his voice sounding graveling and hoarse. You swallow harshly.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you reply, your eyes falling to his lips before quickly snapping yourself out of it.

“You just couldn’t help yourself, could you? Knowing exactly how to get my attention…” he whispers, leaning in slightly so that his mouth is mere centimeters away from your ear. “Do you like that, baby? Knowing that I’m looking at you, and only you?”

You feel your cheeks start to heat up at his words. You take a deep breath and mutter out a quiet “Yes.” He smiles a crooked smile, and you can still feel his breath on the shell of your ear.

“That’s what I thought. Craving attention, like the filthy whore you are.” He chuckles under his breath when he hears the quiet whimper that comes out of you at his degrading words, and then brushes your hair back slightly to place a soft kiss behind your ear. “You don’t have to try so hard to get my attention, sunshine… all you had to do was ask.”

With that, he backs away from you, turning around and then heading into the dining room to make himself a drink, leaving you alone in the kitchen. Your chest is heaving slightly from the adrenaline, your heart is beating ten times fast, and you can feel your arousal start to drip down your thigh. You opted out of wearing any underwear this evening, which you now know was a huge mistake. 

Finally, Josh, Sam, and Danny reemerge from outside, carrying cases of beer and grocery bags. You greet them and smile shyly at Josh as he sets the bags down and walks over to you, wrapping one around your waist. As you catch Jake’s eyes in the mirror above the bar cart and notice the mischievous look that starts to creep over his face, you know that you’re about to be in for a long night.

You wait for Jake to desert the bar cart and find a seat at the kitchen island before walking over to make yourself a very strong drink, which you know you’re going to need. You pour yourself what seems to be about two shots of tequila before adding some soda water. The guests have begun to arrive now, trickling in slowly, and as social as you typically are, you didn’t really feel like you were in the mood for the same old small talk. “How’s the tour?” “What’s in store next for the band?” It’s always the same questions, and as much as Josh loves to answer them and talk about his art, you didn’t have it in you to stand there quietly and nod along. And then, as though someone had read your mind, a soft voice calling your name broke you from your trance.

“Y/N, hey,” you turn your head to see Sam standing in front of you. You offer him a soft smile, silently thanking him for saving you from your thoughts. 

“Hey, Sam,” you answer, straightening your back, trying not to seem as absent as you so clearly were. You watch as he walks up next to you, taking the bottle opener from the bar cart and popping off the bottlecap from his beer, then setting it back down. 

“D’you wanna go hang out in the living room with me? You look a bit bored, and Daniel’s already ditched me for some chick,” he chuckles to himself, then takes a swig of his beer before continuing. “We could put a record on, I’ll even let you choose.” You giggle a bit and look up at him for a moment. “Sure.”

The two of you walk through the dining room into the living room, where a few people have already started to congregate. You see Jake in the corner of the room speaking to who you know to be one of their producers, his back leaning against the wall with his whiskey glass in his hand. You immediately shake it off and opt to ignore him.

Sam sits down on one of the loveseats, leaning back against the cushion. You walk over to Josh’s record player and sift through his record collection, trying to find the perfect one for the occasion. After searching for a moment, a smile grows on your face as you pull out Fleetwood Mac’s Rumours. You take the vinyl out of its protective sleeve and place it gingerly on the turntable, then lift the arm and place the needle delicately on the edge of the record.

 As Second Hand News begins to play, you walk back toward the loveseat and sit down next to Sam. He’s wearing a toothy grin, and says “Good choice, Y/N,” then takes another sip of his beer. You watch as his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, then look back up at his face and smile at him. He wasn’t a bad-looking guy, and he was certainly sweet- though, not your type. You subtly turn around to see if Jake is watching, and you’re immediately met with his eyes piercing through you. This will definitely do the trick.

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After a few hours of sitting and chatting with Sam, and several more tequila sodas, you excuse yourself to use the restroom. Josh had popped in every once and a while to check in on you, sometimes choosing a record to put on, then going back to whoever he was talking to. He knew you didn’t need him to hover over you, you could handle socializing without him. Besides, he had never asked you to be his girlfriend, so who would he introduce you as to his colleagues anyway? It was less complicated to just keep to yourself. 

Or, keep to Sam, if you’re being specific. The two of you talked for hours, just about traveling and the outdoors and his garden. You knew Jake was watching, and every once and a while, you’d touch Sam’s arm while you spoke just to get Jake riled up, and you knew it was working. 

You head upstairs to use the bathroom and decide to use Josh’s master bathroom instead of the main one, to check on your makeup and have a few moments to yourself. You finally break the seal, and as you stand up from the toilet, you feel your head rush a bit- a sure sign that you’ve clearly had enough to drink. You fix your makeup, reapply your lipstick, and then run your hands through your hair a bit to get out any kinks. 

You pull your phone out of your purse and see the time: 10:27 p.m. Still a decent amount of time until midnight. As you slip your phone back into your purse, you hear the outer door to the bedroom open and shut. You open the bathroom door and step out to find Josh approaching you.

“Hey, baby,” he says, a slight slur in his voice giving you the impression that he's had a few to drink himself. “I was wondering where you went off to… was worried about you.” He slips his arms around your waist, pulling you into him and placing a kiss on your cheek.

“Oh, I’m alright, don’t worry,” you answer, wrapping your arms around his neck and running your fingers through the hair on the back of his neck. “Just needed to powder my nose.” You let out a little giggle at the phrase, which brings a big smile to his face.

“Well, you look beautiful, darling,” he says, kissing your cheek again, then trailing his lips down, peppering soft kisses along your jaw. “Been thinking about you all night, you know.”

You smirk as you lean your head back slightly to give him more access to your neck. “You have?” you jest, bringing one of your hands down to grip his shoulder for stability as he starts to suck lightly on the skin of your neck.

“Of course I have… Haven’t been able to take my eyes off of you in this dress, baby… We didn’t get to finish what we started earlier, did we?” he mumbles against your skin as he guides you toward his bed. The warmth of his breath against your neck is enough to get you aroused, especially combined with all the alcohol in your system, and you already feel the wetness pooling between your thighs. 

You grab the collar of his sweater and pull him into you as your back falls onto the bed, capturing his lips in yours. His hands grip your ass firmly before his right hands slides between your legs. When he finally notices your lack of underwear, he lets out a low groan and leans back down to kiss you again.

“Fuck, baby,” he mumbles against your lips, his voice dripping in lust, “You do this for me?” He runs his fingers through your wetness as he attacks your neck again, causing you to let out a small moan as you nod “yes” and reach your hands down to start undoing his belt. You can already feel that he’s ridiculously hard, and your intoxicated state is causing you to be a bit more impatient than usual.

“I need you, Josh. Need you so bad,” you whine, which makes him groan loudly against your neck. You use your hands to pull him onto the bed more before pushing him to the other side, with him lying on his back. You quickly hike your dress up over your hips before crawling back onto the bed agilely now with the increased freedom from your tight dress. After gently tapping the side of Josh’s thigh, he get the message and lifts his hips up off the bed, allowing you to shimmy his pants and boxers down just enough so they sit resting at his mid-thigh.

You position yourself at the bottom of the bed, taking Josh’s thick, hardened cock in your hands, pumping it a few times before taking him slowly into your mouth. He lets out a deep, guttural groan as he watches you take him completely down your throat. “God, you look so fuckin’ sexy like that,” he utters, bringing his hand down to brush your hair out of your face and then holding it all in his fist as you bob your head up and down. He throws his head back as you ease him all the way to the back of your throat, but then quickly pulls you off of him. “If you keep going, I’m not gonna last, baby. Need to feel you,” he says, pulling you up to straddle him.

You place your right hand on the back of his neck and pull him into a deep kiss as your other hand works to align yourself with him, letting the straps of your dress sling down your arms. Finally, you slowly sink down on him, letting out a moan that’s much louder than you intended. You kiss him passionately, slipping your tongue past his lips and joining his as you start to lift your hips slowly, then bring them back down. 

“Fuck, that’s it, darling’. Just like that,” he moans, gripping your hip tightly with his left hand as the other finds your breast now pouring out of your dress. He squeezes it softly, then rolls your nipple between his fingers, causing you to let out another moan. His lips find your neck and travel downward, sucking harsh bites into your collarbone. You pick up the pace on top of him, throwing your head back as the feeling of his lips on your neck and his cock throbbing inside of you begin to throw you completely out of orbit.

Josh starts to thrust upwards into you, meeting you halfway as you become a blubbering mess for him. “Oh, fuck Josh, right there,” you whine, squeezing your eyes shut as the euphoric feeling takes over. He takes that moment to flip the both of you over, then swiftly tucking his dick back into you and takings your lips in his. You whine loudly, which is barely being muffled inside the walls of his mouth, but you don’t care.

You could tell by his uncontrolled thrusts that he was getting close, and you knew that with both of you having had as much to drink as you had, this wasn’t going to last long. He groans loudly into your mouth one final time before, pulling out of you and straddling your torso quickly, holding himself up with one hand on his headboard behind you. Hunched over you, you place kisses along his abdomen as he throws his head back with a groan and finishes on your chest. 

He brings his head down to rest on top of yours, leaving a soft kiss on top of your head before getting up. As he stands up next to the bed, he looks down at you, admiring the sight of you lying on his bed, with your dress now only left covering your mid section. “My god, you are exquisite… could put this view in a fucking museum,” he mutters, leaning over you and grasping one of your breasts in his hand, spreading his cum across them. He groans as his hands caress you, bringing his lips down to kiss you. Finally, he pulls his pants up slightly, retreating to the bathroom to get a wet hand towel to clean you off before the both of you redress for the rest of the party.

✺⋅∘⋅•⋅∘⋅✧⋅∘⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅∘⋅✧⋅∘⋅∙⋅∘⋅✺

JAKE’S POV

You excuse yourself to go get another drink, then walk over to the dining room. As you pour yourself another glass of whiskey, you wonder how many you’d reached- was it four? Maybe five? It doesn’t matter. You take a long sip before returning to the living room, then notice that she’s gone. You swear she was just here. Sam was still there on the couch, thank God. You knew that she was hanging all over him to get under your skin, and it makes your blood boil to admit that she was succeeding. 

You set your glass down on a side table and then venture upstairs in hopes of finding her alone. She was no match for your charm, no matter how hard she fought you on it. But as you climb the stairs and take a look around, you can’t help but notice noises coming from Josh’s bedroom. 

Out of curiosity, you slowly creep closer to the door, and the sound that you find coming from the room makes your heart nearly stop beating. It’s her, you know it’s her- but she’s not alone. 

“Oh, fuck Josh, right there,” you hear her exclaim, sending shivers down your spine. Despite the sounds being for your brother, all you can think about is how you can get her to make those noises for you. You’d never admit it out loud, but you’d do anything to feel her underneath you again, to be the one coaxing those moans out of her. 

Just the idea of it sends half the blood from your brain straight down to your dick, you can’t control it. You feel yourself strain against the material of your pants as you listen to her whine on the other side of the door. You slowly palm your erection through your pants, just to find some relief and get it under control, but you realize that it’s much more serious than you thought. 

With that, you pull yourself away, heading into the bathroom in the hallway at the top of the stairs. You quickly shut the door and lock it behind you. As you approach the mirror, you almost don’t recognize the man staring back at you. Who are you, to let some girl get the best of you like this? Not only that, but the aspect of her being off-limits makes it even more appealing. Whatever, you’re nothing if not a masochist. You’ve found yourself in trickier situations than this in your lifetime.

You reach down and try to ease your erection away again as you hear the distant sound of a door shutting. Curiosity takes control, and you unlock the door and stick your head out, seeing your brother threading his belt back together, bouncing down the stairs, and turning the corner toward the kitchen. You shut off the light and crack the door open now, leaning against the wall and waiting for her to inevitably come out.

✺⋅∘⋅•⋅∘⋅✧⋅∘⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅∘⋅✧⋅∘⋅∙⋅∘⋅✺

YOUR POV

Thanks to Josh’s help, you have to fix your makeup again, so he heads downstairs first without you while you go back into his bathroom to freshen up. As you finish up, you check your phone one last time: 11:29 p.m. Better get going, you thought.

You open the door to Josh’s room and step out into the hallway, shutting it behind you. You walk toward the steps, but before you’re able to start your descent, you feel two strong, calloused hands pull you back into the hallway bathroom. The figure shuts the door, leaning your back against it as they flick the light on and you’re suddenly face to face with a very inebriated Jake Kiszka.

“Was curious about where you ran off to… now I know. Dirty girl,” he mutters, reaching down to sweep a piece of your hair out of your eyes. You let out a quiet sigh as you looked up at him, realizing that he’d heard you.

“Where I ran off to is none of your business, for the record,” you scoff, rolling your eyes. He ignores your jaggedness and continues.

“First, you flirt with my little brother right in front of me all evening, Then you sneak away to fuck my twin brother, during his own party, knowing that I could find you there.” He brings his hand up to rest on the back of your neck, his thumb caressing your cheek softly. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think that you were trying to make me jealous…”

You look up at him, answering smartly, “What would you say if I was?” A smirk washes over his face at your answer, and you hate that you’re feeding right into his ego, but the alcohol in your system doesn’t seem to care. 

“I told you earlier, sweetheart- If you wanted my attention, all you had to do was ask,” he says, leaning down to brush his nose against your cheek, then whispering directly into your ear. “But now you’ve got me all worked up… And we can’t have that, can we? You can’t just tease me in public like that and expect me to let you get away with it.”

Your breath grows shaky as the feeling of his mouth so close to you starts to intoxicate you. “What are you going to do?” you ask.

“I think I’m gonna have to teach you a lesson, sunshine…” he answers, bringing his hands down to your hips and guiding you over to the sink, resting your back against the cold marble. He leans in once more, resting his lips against the shell of your ear. “If you’re going to act like a slut, then I am going to treat you like one.”

With that, his hands turn you around, bending you over the sink. You plant your hands firmly on either side of the counter, panting slightly from the anticipation as your eyes meet his in the mirror. His lips meet your shoulder, placing soft kisses there then slowly down your back. His left hand rests on your hip while his right is planted firmly on the small of your back, keeping you bent over in just the way he wants. You’ve never been handled by a man like this before, and you’re not complaining.

You feel his hands slowly slide your dress up over your ass to rest on your hips, much like your encounter with Josh not long ago. But Josh is long gone from your mind now- all you can think about is the feeling of Jake’s breath on your skin as he plants agonizingly slow kisses on your thighs.

 As Jake sees your core, bare and open to him underneath your dress, he lets out a deep groan. “Fucking filthy. I knew it,” he mumbles, then sucks a love bite on your asscheek, placing a soft kiss afterward. He brings his face back up to meet your gaze in the mirror once again.

He pulls your hair over your left shoulder then starts sucking the sensitive part of your neck as his fingers start to run through your folds. His eyes look up to meet yours in the mirror as he removes his lips from you for a second.

“He didn’t make you cum, did he, sweetheart?” he asks, kissing your shoulder as his fingers find your clit, rubbing slow circles against it. You bite your lip to stifle the moan that almost erupted from deep inside your chest and then shake your head “No.”

“No, he didn’t, did he? Left that job to me, huh?” he mumbles against your skin. “Don’t worry, darling. I’ll take good care of you.”

Jake crouches back down and then spreads your cheeks apart, letting out a low groan as he plants a wet kiss right on your folds and immediately dives in. You have to steady yourself from the sudden movement and quiet your moans with a bite of your lip as he attacks your core from behind you.

He makes quick work of you as his tongue pleasures your pussy, licking deep inside and making you feel like never before. His right hand wraps around you and makes quick circles around your clit, causing you to let out a quiet moan. He groans against your core at the sound and palms himself through his pants as he gets you closer and closer to your climax. As he hears your noises become less and less controlled, he can tell you’re close. 

“That’s it, baby, cum all over my face like the dirty whore you are, you know I want it,” he says quickly before diving back into you. His pace quickens even more and before you know it, you feel your orgasm crashing over you. It’s like something you’d never felt before, it erupts from you before you can even see it coming and you can’t stop it. Jake coaxes you through it, helping you down from it. 

You finally come down from your high, you turn around to face him and find his face completely soaked. You gasp at the sight before pulling him up and capturing his lips with yours, tasting yourself as your tongue slips into his mouth. He moans into your mouth, pulling you closer to him. You feel his hard cock against your core, straining against his pants, causing you to whine against his lips. 

You pull away from him, resting your forehead on his. “Jake…” you say, resting your hands around his waist. “Let me make you feel good…” Your eyes meet his and you can see the internal battle happening in his head as he shakes his head and shows you his watch. 11:54. 

Shit. You had to go, and he knew it. Your eyes soften as you look up at him. “I’m sorry,” you utter as he backs away from you, allowing you to exit the bathroom. You unlock the door, pull it open, and then turn around to look at him one more time. There’s a look in his eye that you can’t place, but you don’t have the time to ask him about it at this moment. 

You rush down the stairs to find all the partygoers in the living room, watching the ball-drop countdown on Josh’s flatscreen TV. You see Josh, leaning against the wall near the dining room holding his drink, by himself. Your heart sank a bit knowing that he was alone and didn’t know where you were, but it didn’t matter now.

“Hi, baby, sorry it took me so long,” you say, wrapping your arm around his waist. He looks over at you, a smile growing on his face. “I had a lot more to drink tonight than I thought, so I had to take a couple more minutes to collect myself.”

“That’s okay, darlin’. I’m just glad you're here now, you’re just in time,” he says with a grin, placing a soft kiss on your cheek as you both turn to watch the TV.

5… 4… 3… 2… 1… Happy New Year!

As the clock hits midnight, Josh wraps his hands around your waist, pulling you in for a long kiss. You cup both of his cheeks with your hands as you both share a special New Year’s kiss. As he finally pulls away, you can’t help but notice Jake across the room, standing alone with his eyes locked on you. You watch as he picks up his half-drank glass of whiskey and downs the rest of it, slamming it back down on the table and then walking out of the room to the kitchen. 

That’s when you knew that you were way over your head. You’re not sure how you can appease one twin without hurting the other. You realize that it all goes much deeper than you knew, and whatever you had with Jake wasn’t going away anytime soon. You know you have to face it head-on. But where will that lead you? You’ll likely end up breaking somebody’s heart, but whose will it be? If you’re not careful, it might be your own.

✺⋅∘⋅•⋅∘⋅✧⋅∘⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅∘⋅✧⋅∘⋅∙⋅∘⋅✺

read part three here

leave a comment or send me a dm to be added to the taglist! thanks for reading! see you all real soon ;)

Taglist:

@itsafullmoon @vanfleeter @klarxtr @itsdannysworld @lipstickitty @peaceloveunitygvf @wildmoonworld @ignite-my-fire @gretasfallingsky @cxffeecakez @gvfmarge @highladyofasgard

[paradisedixon]

ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍʏ

rick grimes x fem!reader

summary: you’re tired of having to ask everyone for supplies after shane forbid you from going on runs for no reason, so you ask the next best man for permission.

warning(s): bad flirting?? idk

⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

“Hey, Rick? Can I talk to you for a second?” You approached him and Shane, hand on one of your hips. Rick nodded and Shane stood there, just looking at you.

“Alone.” You almost sneered, and Shane scoffed before walking away. Rick had an amused expression directed at you, and you shook your head.

“I know he’s your best friend, Rick, but God he can be annoying.” Rick chuckled at you, crossing his arms, the muscles of his forearms more prominent under his brown button down.

“You wanted to talk to me about somethin’?” His drawl made you blank, but his words registered a beat later and you huffed a laugh.

“Yeah, I wanted to let you know that I want to go on runs. Now before you refuse,” you held up a hand to stop the words from coming from his already open mouth, “I just want you to know that I used to go on runs with Glenn all the time until Shane showed up. Glenn already said he’d be happy to help me get back in the groove, I just didn’t want to go behind your back.” Rick looked impressed with your maturity, and you realized up until then he thought of you as just a kid, with you being so much younger. He just looked at you for a moment, and you started to get nervous. Had I overstepped? Was me asking Glenn before I asked him already going behind his back?

Aaaand here comes the word vomit.

“And I’m sorry, Rick, but I’m not doing your laundry. I mean what is that,” you motioned to a large, dried, brown spot on the thigh of his jeans, “mud? Shit? I don’t know and I’m not going to know because I’m not scrubbing it. By the way, have I told you how devilishly handsome you are? I mean, your eyes are like the ocean, only dreamier-“

“Alright, alright, you can go. You don’t have to butter me up or nothin’, geez.” He cuts you off with a breathless chuckle. A light blush fanned the apples of his cheeks, and you felt your ears get hot at the realization that you just told the man you had a crush on that his eyes were dreamy. You covered up your embarrassment with a smirk and finger guns.

“You’re the man, Rick.” He chuckled and you both turned away, but in an impulsive move you turned back around and stopped him by his elbow. Why why why-

“And I wasn’t joking, either. The whole mysterious, bad boy slash farmer thing is really workin’ for you.” You kept the smirk on your lips even though you were screaming in your mind, why am I still talking?? Why the hell are you saying that?? Please someone just kill me now-

“I’m flattered, really I am, but I’m a married man.” Rick chuckled, placing his hands on his hips. His eyes looked to see if anyone was hearing this, and when he realized no one was around he looked down at his boots and shook his head with a flustered chuckle. The redness of his ears made you giggle.

“What? A girl can’t pay a man an innocent compliment anymore?” The look of surprise he gave you made your smirk widen into a grin, and you sent him a wink and gave him a pat on his muscular bicep before spinning on your heel and making your way to the farmhouse.

“I won’t let you down, Grimes.” You threw over your shoulder, using the last bit of your confidence to remain calm in your walk back to tell Maggie you just embarrassed the hell out of yourself in front of your group’s leader.

⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

[A/N] this one’s short and sweet lol

[coffeeandbatboys]

The Magic Touch (Kix x Reader)

A/N I had a thought. The natborn GAR officers have to go through intensive physical training regardless of their field (like most militaries that I know of). This is self indulgent right now because I got harassed into doing a crazy hard workout and now I’m sore :/

The first half feels awkward but I had to set it up.

Warnings: sfw; reader’s body is really sore, massages, fluff.

You’re not even halfway through the training program and you’re already hating it.

You thought that you’d been working out substantially all this time, but that theory has since been proven wrong.

The GAR wants your little old radar tech ass to haul the whole damn venator apparently.

You sigh as you near the front door of your apartment, legs still shaky from the exercise.

Kix is already inside, putting together the dinner that you’d left partially prepared in the conservator. You halfheartedly return his smile when he sees you.

“This better be kriffing worth it.” You grumble, setting down your bag and stretching your unsteady arms and legs.

“Did you get enough water? Or electrolytes?” He asks, wrapping you up in a gentle hug.

“Aaaand I stretched before and after.” You confirm.

Satisfied, he smiles and kisses your forehead. “Dinner’s just about ready. I figure we could watch a holo?”

Finally, you smile genuinely. “Yeah that sounds nice.”

You end up showering before dinner, since the ones at the training facility are hardly what you’d call cleansing. As soon as you’re out and dressed in some more comfortable clothes, Kix has both plates of food situated in front of the holoprojector.

Once dinner’s been finished and the holovid is long over, you’re tired and ready to sleep. The two of you retire to the bed, nestled into each other’s embrace.

The first thought you have when you wake up is to stretch.

That’s turns out to be a bad idea, because your body protests with aching muscles. A soft yelp leaves your lips before you can stop it and Kix’s eyes flutter open.

“Y’kay, Mesh’la?” He asks, rubbing his eyes before bringing his hands to your shoulders with concern.

“Mhm.” You hum, trying to sound convincing.

He doesn’t buy it.

“Yeah because you yell in pain every morning.”

You huff. “Fine. I’m sore.”

A deep chuckle rumbles through his chest. “C’mere.”

You trust Kix—he is a medic after all. But you give him a wary look nonetheless as he gently tugs your back against his chest.

“Alright, cyare. Tell me where it hurts.”

You hesitate, suddenly becoming very flustered.

“C’mon. Where does it hurt?”

You gingerly touch your shoulders. You feel his warm, steady hands rest on them and begin to knead the stiff muscles. You stifle a sigh of relief and relax under the touch. His chuckle reverberates on your back, sending goosebumps across your skin.

After a few minutes of giving your shoulders attention, he asks where else it hurts. You sheepishly tap the sides of your torso, near your hips. Again, his hands slide over the skin and work out all of the pain that’s been building up overnight. You don’t even try to stifle the moan that leaves your lips, earning a laugh from your lover.

“Does that feel good, Cyar’ika?”

You hum happily in response.

Kix showers the back of your neck with tender kisses. “Glad I can help.”

“Gonna need to keep you around,” you laugh, leaning back into his chest. “This is gonna be a routine with you for the foreseeable future.”

“And I’ll be here every time you need me.”

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

"And he shall smite the wicked and plunge them into the fiery pit.”

Aaaand we've finally come to the conclusion of Rollo at the Writing Desk! (The masterlist for it will go up later.) If your ask was not answered, it was likely too similar to another interaction and/or was submitted outside of the allotted blog event period 😅 Here's a little piece to "wrap up" Rollo's hellish stay with us at NRC~

The End of Rollo at the Writing Desk.

At the end of his stay, Rollo was more frazzled than Raven had ever seen him.

Of course, he wouldn’t dare to outwardly present disheveled. Certainly not what he could control at least.

Not a hair out of place, and not a single crease in his elegant robes. However, there was an unmistakeable disturbed look in his eyes. Palpable fear and revulsion, as if he had witnessed things he shouldn’t have and failed to scrub his mind of the memories.

“… Is everything okay?” Raven asked, her question a loud whisper in the crystalline Mirror Chamber. The words reflected off of the dark faces of many mirrors, coming back as a soft wail. Okay—okay—okay, came the echo from the unknown.

“Yes.” His reply was prompt, automatic, and without frills. “You needn’t waste your concern on me.”

“… Right.”

Raven turned away and to the Mirror of Darkness. It floated upon its dais, a ghostly apparition of magic.

“O Dark Mirror, I beseech you! Return this soul to where it belongs: Noble Bell College in the City of Flowers.”

Upon her request, the surface of the mirror ripple like water. Some indescribable magic was reaching out across space, tugging on the thread that would connect this place and that. When the rings upon the water faded into smoothness and gave way to a faint image—flying buttresses and stained glass windows illuminated by candles—Raven knew it was ready.

She lifted the hem of her skirt and curtsied to her departing guest as he stepped onto the dais. “Bon voyage, Rollo-senpai. I hope you enjoyed your time with us here at our Night Raven College.”

Enjoyed?

A strong word to assign to his harrowing experiences. Parties swarming with people, offenses committed, confrontations he was not yet ready for.

“I’m like you, and you’re like me,” he had been told, time and time again. Tearing open old wounds, rubbing the salt in for good measure. “We’re not so different, you and I.”

And his brother.

What would he think of him now…?

There it was again, that slow, uneasy pain that filled his chest and fanned outward. The feeling festered like a fire with no one to put it out. Standing before the gateway home, it suddenly hurt more than ever.

Rollo glanced back at his attendant, providing a curt good-bye. “… This is is farewell, Miss Crowley.”

“It’s only farewell ‘for now’,” she corrected him. “We’ll speak again. We’ll meet again. I’m sure of it!!”

In the beginning, he would have scowled at the reminder—at this incessant bird chirping in his ear, insisting on sitting on his shoulder like a cricket claiming to be his conscience. Now, he was tired, and laid there in defeat.

But raise the formal white flag? Concede admit defeat, let her have the last laugh?

Never.

He rested a hand on the mirror frame.

“… I await your next written correspondence. It doesn’t sound like you intend on giving up anytime soon.”

“Nope!!” Raven flashed a grin which showed off her tiny fangs. “I can be stubborn when I want to be.”

A dry, arrogant chuckle. “I am well aware. Then…”

He returned his attention to the mirror, and the world that laid beyond it

“The time is nigh.”

There was no steeling of the soul, no anticipatory breath before taking the plunge. Rollo simply stepped through the portal, and he was gone.

The raven was alone in the Mirror Chamber, smiling into the darkness.

It’s a promise.

[oliiroo]

Angel: Husker the Hunk… has a nice ring to it, dontcha’ think, whiskers?

Husk: Uh.. no.

Angel: Aww, c’mon. Stop being so uptight, big guy! Honestly, you ‘oughta learn how to take a load off every now and then - figuratively aaaand literally. *wink*

Husk: Hah, yeah… right. Maybe some people just don’t like being called every ridiculously shitty nickname in the book.

Charlie: Oooo, wait that’s… actually such a good idea! A game in which one person calls another as many lovely, endearing pet names as possible! It’d be a way to show one’s love for one another! Ooh, what a great way to get our creative juices flowing! And, and, and— once we do that, and we’re all buttered up to each other, we could also take time to reflect on everyones self-help journey here at the Hazbin Hotel! It is very important to not only make note of your own improvement, but to also acknowledge your fellow peer’s accomplishments as well! Oh, oooh! I also think it would be amazing if—

Husk: … See, look what you’ve done.

Angel: You’re the one who fueled the idea, poofball!

Husk: Don’t go throwing this on me! You—

Angel: Yeah, yeah… whatever. I’m too tired for this shit, let her yap away. How ‘bout you just whip me up something good, hm, snookums?

Hunk: Seriously, man. Chill with the nicknames.

Angel: Whatever you say, blue balls.

[call-me-casual]

Aaaand here are the last works I did for the final three days of octonauts week. I really should have completed these sooner but I was either busy, felt sick or was tired ;-;

Day Five - Book redraw (The backgrounds were really fun to draw)

Day Six - Movie/episode redraw (I did the scene just after Barnacles is freed from the hole.)

Day Seven - Au or Headcanon (My designs for the octonauts (minus tunip and inkling) in my Something Wild AU. They’re just wip’s for now because I’m planning to try and do some detailed stuff with them)

[melancholy-marionette]

Hi! How are you today?

You've likely already been asked this, but what do you use to make visual novels? How did you learn to do it? All the ones you make are so cool!!! 💖

Heya! I would say 'tired' is probably the main way I feel today xD I’ve been staying up until 4am again recently and forcing myself up again at 8:30am trying to make up for lost time on the jam that I’m currently taking part in with Lazy Polar Bear x3 (otome/josei jam)

We even tried our best to plan some stuff in advance so that we could have a chilled-out jam for once, but the world had other plans it seems, haha. We've both been hit by a fair bit of bad luck, so I’m pushing myself in the hope we’ll still be able to release a demo in time for the end of the jam. Energy drinks are very much my friend atm x3

I’m so sorry it’s taken me forever to answer anyhow! I’m still majorly behind on pretty much everything >.< so most of my replies are at snail speed, haha. It doesn’t help that my PC died at the end of April, and trying to get a new one has been a nightmare :( 

I knew it was on its way out for a while, so I’d been saving up + making sure to regularly backup data (thankfully, I don’t think I lost too much!) Managed to scrape together enough to get a new one, but when it was delivered, something was wrong with it >.< The first time I powered it on, there was a super loud scraping sound from a fan or something, and it threw up some BIOS error stuff instead of booting Windows.

I contacted the company, and they arranged to collect it & rebuild it for me, which took a while to do. Just had the rebuilt one delivered this week, but there’s still something not quite right about it :( It takes over 1 minute to boot up from pressing to power on (for reference, my PC that died was over 10 years old and booted up in about 10 seconds!) The 4th time I powered the new one on, it lit up inside, but never displayed anything. I gave it 5 minutes, but still nothing, so had to hit the reset button on the case.

Aaaand, one of the hard drives scans show it’s temperature is 68 degrees while the PC is idle, which doesn’t seem good >.< Neither does how hot the processor and graphics cards are showing on temperature readings when idle. As far as I can tell though, all the fans are working fine! 

Still in contact with support trying to find out what is going on :( Which is not what I need while trying to work on a jam project, haha.

Anyways, I’m so sorry for the giant ramble there!! To actually answer your question x3 I don’t think I’ve been asked it that much actually! Maybe only like once or twice :3 The first couple of VNs I made were made with Tyranobuilder cos that was the first thing I came across that seemed easy to use, and it was :D I did try Ren’Py first, but after completing a few tutorials and making a demo project, I hated having to do code stuff so much that I knew it would make me not want to make a full game if that was how I had to do it >.<

I got Tyranobuilder in a Humble Bundle years ago, and it claimed you could make VNs from scratch without writing a single line of code because it used a drag & drop system, so I figured I’d give it a shot! It definitely did what it said on the tin :3 I made my first-ever game with it (Solipsism Reigns) + another one after that (Impostor) before switching to something else. (well, there was also the CiQ demo too, but that's irrelevant now that the game is being made in Nani!)

I think I read a couple of basic tutorials for Tyrano, but it was honestly all really easy to get going with by just poking around in there and seeing what did what, haha.

Besides those first couple of games, everything else I’ve made has been using Naninovel in Unity. I’d say Nani took longer to get started with, but the tutorials are vast and very detailed, so that was a big help. I also managed to get it while it was on sale, so that was a relief since it’s quite expensive full price.

I switched for a couple of reasons. One being that the drag & drop system in Tyrano was fantastic for a beginner like me, but also quite slow, so once I’d grown a bit more confident with how things worked, I figured something like Naninovel with an easy-to-understand scripting language would probably allow me to work faster!

The other big reason was because of how buggy Tyrano seemed to be >.< There were a lot of issues in it that didn’t seem to be having fixes worked on by the software devs at the time (I believe they have since updated it though!) And it was just frustrating to discover there was the odd bug in my game that I couldn’t fix because it was caused by something in the software itself that I hadn’t even touched.

I’ve stuck with Naninovel because it’s definitely easy to use, has a tonne of brilliant guides, and the support on Discord has always been exceptional whenever I’ve needed help on how to do something :3 There’s still a lot about it that I don’t know how to use or little gripes I have with it here and there, but overall, I do prefer it to Tyrano. Nothing is ever gonna be perfect.

It does make collaborating difficult sometimes though because Ren’Py is still the most commonly used tool for making VNs I guess. So if you want to work with people to do code and stuff, and 1 only has knowledge of Ren’Py while the other only has knowledge of Nani’s scripting language and what Nani can do, it’s like you’re speaking two completely different languages when it comes to trying to understand each other x3

If I didn’t have to write code, I would probably use Ren’Py xD It’s just, while I still dislike having to type thousands of lines of Naniscript, I find it at least manageable without getting the world’s biggest headache, haha.

I’m glad that you think the stuff I make turns out cool though! :3 That means a lot ^-^ I always kinda feel like an impostor when it comes to everything I do in game dev just cos I never had any proper training or education >.< I guess a lot of VN devs are probably self-taught though! It is fun to figure things out yourself by trial and error, but I’m sure I must be doing heaps of stuff wrong xD or at least in ways that aren’t exactly the most efficient x3 I muddle through though :D 

Hope you are well + that May is turning out to be a marvellous month for you! Or at the very least, that you have had better luck than me lately, haha.

[angst-in-space]

january '24 writing progress

words written: 10.6k

most words written in a day: 1.7k

least words written in a day: 0

yearly total: 10.6k

projects worked on:

ya sci-fi book rewrites

sylvix pacrim au

matchablossom bedsharing fic

sylvix dreamscape fic ch 10 edits

works published in january:

none

january goals:

sigh. finish ya sci-fi book rewrites. please. please i’m so fuckin tired.

start working on line edits?

work on query package

errrrm maybe send out like. one query. just for funsies.

edit sylvix dreamscape fic ch 10

WRITE FANFIC!! HAVE FUN GODDAMMIT

finish edit letter for friend

maybe work on outlining adult sci-fi wip again

february goals:

*stares into the camera* please let me finish ya sci-fi book rewrites. please for the love of god

keep working on query package

perhaps send out one query for funsies

finish editing sylvix dreamscape fic ch 10 and send to betas

work on fic at least a little??

maybeee at least touch one of my other books i.e. keep working on arctic monster book or planning space dads book, idk we'll see

notes:

an....okay start to the year! i once again did NOT finish rewriting my ya sci-fi book which i am...not thrilled about, although i am really trying to be gentle with myself (but i've been rewriting it for like 10 months now and i'm TIREDDDD). however, i am really getting into the last arc of it now so *sweats* just hoping i don't monumentally fuck it up ahahaha.

i also did work a liiiiittle on my query package in anticipation of querying....eventually... my plans to chaotically send out a single query by end of january did not come to fruition. buuuut maybe in february? we'll see lol. i figure it at least helps to have a query + synopsis handy for when i AM ready!

i didn't do a ton of work on fic, but i did at least get through maybe half of my initial round of edits on sylvix dreamscape ch 10! hoping i can finish up edits on that this month and hand it off to betas. i also dusted off my matchablossom bedsharing fic and worked a bit on that (thanks to the announcement of the teen matchablossom OVA which inspired me to write about them again lol). aaaand i worked on sylvix pacrim au like once which is better than nothing!!

i say it every goddam month but...maybe i will finally finish my book rewrites this month? *holding back my tears* if so i might take a lil break before line edits and actually have time to work on fic and/or on other original projects i've been neglecting, but if so it probably won't be til the very end of the month. SIIIIGH.

anyway, manifesting a productive month!!! 🙏✨

[pebiejeebies]

PART 10 (FINALE) OF MY CABLOON ANALYSIS! GO TO MY #CABLOON-ANALYSIS TAG TO FIND THE FIRST POST!

(I’m gonna make it easier to access the older ones, I’ll make a master post, then I’ll make it so you can check the next part by a link so you don’t manually tire yourself, give me some time cause I need a mental break from my shutdown 😭‼️)

Literally one of the most precious moments I’ve screen recorded in my whole life, the way he’s sitting beside her, laughing just like her, writing in her files, both of them equally sharing the same annoyed stare at silver spoon (Which is something a lot more common than I thought it was)

THIS.

This is just.. *wipes away tear*

Too perfect..

I wonder what happens to Mephone..? (Good lord I am still traumatized till this 

Now expect MANY MANY MANY random screenshots of my babies togethr 

STOP HOW BALLOON EXCITEDLY INFODUMPS WITH CABBY JANSHEHSHQJJEDHHJWWJ

They’re autistics in love I tell you

LOOK AT HOW HE’S TOUCHING HER AHHH (please don’t thkae that out of context omfg—)

I have a feeling that she was slightly uncomfortable here (sTOP PROJECTING YOURSELF ONTO CABBY PEBIE!! STOP!!)

Its canon guys he was trying to impress her here too

Why else would he give her that smug ass look?!/vpos

Then he sees uninterested cabby and gets sad :(

stop guys it’s actually so sad

The way she got excited when she said that was SO SASAADDDDD 

SHES SO STRESSED OMG I FEEL YOU GIRL AAHHHHHH

AHAHGSGAHHSHHEHGWG😭😭‼️‼️

I CANTT THE POOR GIRL IS HORRIFIED

Unsure if she was looking at Mephone or Balloon, but I guess they’re beside each other here, so uh excuse me lol

STOP

STOOOOPPP

THEYRE IN SYNC YALL

LOOOOOOOOK!!! HANDS ON HIPS, SAME FUCKING FACE TWICE, AND IN THE SAME SCENE TOO OMFG

CABBY AND BALLOON RAISE ONE HAND AUTISTICALLY, AND THE OTHER LIKE SILVER SPOON, FROM. THE. SAME. SIDE. AND LITERALLY HAVE A SIMILAR FACE!! I-I CANT BELIEVE HOW MUCH THEYRE ACTING LIKE EACH OTHER WITHOUT EVEN NOTICING IT IM FUCKING EVAPORATING AND EXPLODING… EXVAPORATING!!!

THATS LIKE.. 3 SYNCED POSES + EMOTIONS IN ONE SCENE IM GONNA CRY

GRRRRRR HOW COULD YOU SHAKE MY BOY LIKE THAT!!

ALSO. WHO THE FUCK DARES CALL MY BABIES INSECTS.. LOOK WHO THE FUCK CAME FROM THE DEPTHS OF EARTH ITSELF LOOKING LIKE ONE!!/silly /nsrs /omfgdontkillmeafterthisplease—

Erm actually… Cabby and Balloon are definitely engaging after this. Real. And uh she has AWESOME YINYANG, AAAAND BOT!! Balloom has an awkwardly clingy and.. well.. pathetic friend aswell, but hey! Even they have something to leave with! Look at silver spoon..

He doesn’t have candle on his side anymore

Btw.. look at this: You see how Balloon is holding his arm and looking at cabby?

Do you think he, well… wants to hold her hand?

LIKE— NO SERIOUSLY LOOK

STOOOPP AAAHHH MY HEART

YOU CANT TELL ME THAT HE ISNT WORRIED ABOUT CREEPING HER OUT IF HE HELD HER HAND

(Uh wow maybe me projecting myself up there could make sense— OH MY GOD IM GETTING SO MUCH HEADCANONS IM HAVING A HEADACHE YEEEOWWCH)

It’s either (Read this well cause it might confuse you the first time you read it)

He wants comfort from her

Or

He wants to comfort her

Or

This is all accidentally lining up too well

Or

I’m just delusional and this isn’t even lining up at all

WOOOOAAAAAHHH!! EPIC BATTLE SCENE IN REEAAALL LIIIFFFEEEEE?££\#+@}+++}={==£[&$]^)-][.

(Just distract yourself Pebie, ignore how AE made an evil alter of silver spoon aswell.. calm DOWN)

STOOOOOPPPP!! WE GET IT!! THEYRE SOULMATES!! H.. HOW DO THESE TWO HAVE SO MUCH SIMILAR MOMENTS LIKE THIS OMFG/vvvvvvpos

My babies are sticking together OMFG I’m actually exvaporting STICK TOGETHER BABIES!! YOULL GET OUT OF THIS ALIVE!!! HH.HOPEFYKLU

IMANNAHAHWGSBHDJDJAKAKKSNDJD

IM SHAKKIIJHHHHH OKDMDHAHBBAHHHWHGGDGGDAAAAAA

WEEEE SHE SAID WE

SHE SAID WE OMFGGFGAFFSFVS

THE WAY SHE SAVED HIM IN CLUCTH IM FGGISNNG

IM GONNA.CRUY. IM SUBHIAJJJJSJ

LISTEN UP WALKIE TALKIE. YOU DONT DRAE THREATEN CABBY’S FUTURE HUSBAND AND GET AWAY WITH IT GRRRRRRYEHAHWJSJ

But let’s be fr, As much as I love Mephone and his silly shenanigans, this literally affected me the same way it did for them, just.. look at their faces man :(

NOOO NOOO!! STOP STOP STOOOP I DIDNT AGREE TO THIS!1 DONT HURT THEM!! PLLEEEAAAAASSSSEEEEEE 😭😭😭‼️‼️‼️ IM LITERALLY SHIVERING FOR THEM OMFG MY BABIES

I SWEAR IF YOU LAY A FINGER ON ANY OF THEM ILL FUCKING—

Deep betreath… breeaathehees… I’m not ANGRY. nooo wayhhhy.  ,.,,uhm..—

HEY AE.. DO THEY MAKE IT SO THEY ALL LIKE MEPHONE IN THE END?? CAUSE LIKE.. It would be so awesome, it would be so cool—

Yeah WHOOOOH!! I took yesterday night, from 8/9pm to 11pm, STYAED UP ALL NIGHT CAUSE I COULDNT SLEEP FROM THESE TWO, stayed up until like.. 10am, fell asleep, woke up at 2:40pm and BAM! FINSIHED AFTER A DAY!! YIPPIEROONIES!!! (Edit: Two days, since I had to leave, came back at 9:50pm, finished at 11pm cause bedtime lockdown, then woke up at 10am today and started to do it again, so I technically finished at 2pm today)

I have a feeling that someone reading this started liking the ship, or felt curious about their rare pair interaction (if they had any/lh), but either way, I’ll tell you how THIS rare pair even EXSISTED.

(THE LORE OF WHY I EVEN SHIPPED CABLOON)

Let’s start from the beginning. In some of the episodes, before I knew I kin cabby, I always had a little fascination towards balloon, his issues living with him for so long and how he still struggles to make a good image of himself was just. Cute to me (stop I KNOW you simp for objects too.. DONT DENY IT!!)

And at episode 17, after I found out I kin cabby, I started to like their interactions more, and since this ship was a HEAVY SELF INSERT, It somehow made sense.

They both struggled to gain a good image, they both had a toxic friendship in the past that got resolved, they both have TOO MUCH ISSUES, and they both act like each other so much it’s actually wild

None of us EVER cared to really analyze hidden relationships in the show, and this is actually a good example, if I never simped for balloon like the ‘loon’atic I am

*knee slap*

I would’ve NEVER noticed their cute feelings for each other

As much as I wanna continue talking, I feel like this ramble will never end, so I give you a cabloon doodle!

And I bid you farewell *bows dramatically*