#a) redo my stupid fucking theme

[posallys]

ok 1 ur desktop theme is GORG and 2 i need (if u wanna) ur thoughts about the show (or show sally in gen bc ur the only one i trust with her)

thank you!! i was actually thinking about updating it but maybe i wont 🤭🤭 and i have a lot of thoughts about the show except none only very few of them are good and i will be crucified by the 13-year-olds

im going to tell you anyway.

i will start with something i like....percy being angry. like yes give me the anger of a 12 year old who feels utterly alone in the world and doesn't understand (or does and it makes him more angry)

the fight scenes are dog shit. the only kind of cool one was in the arch but it was only cool because of percy doing the bait and switch and falling through the arch...the fights are bland boring sucky whatever other synonym you wanna use

uhhhhh sally jackson is not and would never be sitting in the rain pining of the god she told to leave....and especially not to teen pop...if she WERE going to act like a 16 year old and do the pining thing it would be to fucking like...billy joel and ricky martin and donny hathaway and stuff llike that okay...

i will preface this by saying that yes i understand that talking back to an abuser the way sally does in ep 1 doesn't make the abuse less abusive....however i DO not like the fact that that scene explicitly goes against sally characterization in the books....i am not digging my book out atm but the part where percy is like "my mother has never raised her voice or said an unkind word to anyone"....me thinks the writers all read the books 10 years ago and are going off of memory alone + or their brains are so clouded by the obsessive Big Screen Need to make women a badass girlboss slay queen i fucking hate it here

LET ANNABETH BE SILLY AND FUNNY AND CUTE AND CRY AND NOT BE AN ADULT THANK YOU....hated that they made annabeth the one to realize that it was medusa and not grover...give me back grover having to wrangle percy and annabeth into backpack leashes just to keep them on task/stop them from wandering off...book trio i miss you

i absolutely ADORE leah, walker, and aryan though the three of them are so so perfect, A+ casting no notes couldn't have done it better myself. if it weren't for the three of them i would have zero hope for the show i cannot lie...they're carrying. without them it's just..bad.

the pacing???? bad.

why did we waste half of the 4th ep on the train with echidna...stupid dumb pointless i hate it here

i do like the whole not all monsters are monsters and the gods aren't inherently good just because they're gods thing they've got going on though...very inch resting...silently hoping that they do a complete 180 and have percy side with luke and redo the series from there because that would be iconic as fuck <3 a girl can dream because at least then i could take the show at face value and not take 80 health damage every time they mess up a key part of the books...im at -29834 heath rn.

where was the time at chb before the quest??? the oh so important vital scene where luke teaches percy to sword fight???? like BRO that's soooooooooooo important to ME how could you get rid of that

not having annabeth show percy around camp

additionally, not having annabeth feed him the nectar and ambrosia, WHICH BY THE WAY they haven't even mentioned in the show yet...plot armor gone rip

not the fredrick chase sympathy while simultaniously blaming the woman...........rick when i get my hands on you...

annabeth having to EARN thalia's love??? absolutely not probably one of their biggest fuck ups fr.

the scene where sally is talking about Poseidon to percy...i do not like it sam i am. bad. not wistful enough not longing enough not sad enough not gut wrenching enough...also not completely here for sally telling percy that his dad was a god because....sallys whole thing was NOT telling him in order to keep him safe...i know they changed it in the show so sally knew he was going to camp immediately but that does not mean i have to like it

the scene with sally and percy in the pool. i hated everything about that. sally would never talk to percy like that never talk to him about money never make it seem embarassing NOT TO MENTION that percy simply wasn't scared of the water. that's stupid as fuck. theres a part in the book where percy literally says being by the water calms both him and his mom like...come the fuck on just admit you can't fucking read or at least didn't read the book.

sally annabeth get behind me so they cant hurt you anymore

i did loveeeee percy praying to sally though...absoutely insane and true of them. also the "I AM SALLY JACKSON'S SON" yesss baby you tell them about your mommy!!!!!!

them making athena moa level bad in tlt is quite interesting. setting up annabeth siding with percy pretty well.

also the whole impertinence thing over medusa's head was weird to me. when annabeth first said that i had immediately thought that annabeth's impertinence was telling percy to pray to poseidon IN ATHENA'S TEMPLE bc that made much more sense to me...but whatever

the annabeth/medusa parallel is intriguing at the very least

the underwater scene with the neraid was cool even though i hated the parallel to the pool scene w/ sally.

the dumbass pinecone fate line. 0/10 did you read the book? did you pay attention to how empathetic and reflective percy was when he found out about thalia?

honestly....i think disney was just the wrong place to go with this show because it's like what...pg? it should be pg 13 and should have more... sustenance.

this medusa was so cool though. which we could've seen a fight.

i need to know how many women are in the writer's room though...because It Does Not Look Good. funny how the characters that they're fucking up are all women....crazy. weird. totally coincidental.

are we just not going to talk about the vitality and pressure of getting the bolt back on time? where is the inherent inevitable danger, the suspense, the fear of not accomplishing a seemingly impossible talk looming over everything

this is 10000% not all of my thoughts but im not going to rewatch in order to collect them all so this is what you get xoxox

[chitty-chitty-bang-bang-bang]

Vladislav’s Fluff alphabet

Original template by @eekshade

Requested by @rthounasty (you’re right, Vlad deserves more love)

Warnings: Occasionally vulgar language

Author’s note: The reader will be human here. The whole fucking edited draft of this got deleted bc of my bad WiFi and I had to redo it… Perks of living in a shit hole ig.

_____________________________________________

Admiration. (what do they admire about their S/O)

Vladislav admires the fact, that you see him for what he is. You’re not intimidated by his past or reputation and he doesn’t have to keep up this front around you, because you see him right through and it is such a peculiar feeling to have someone who loves him for him.

Boldness. (how bold are they in regard to their S/O? who confessed first?)

Funnily enough, I feel like you would be the one to confess first. He is a very proud vampire and the thought of a rejection subconsciously scares him way too much to hit it off with you. But after you two are already dating, he’ll be the more bold/initiative one.

Comfort. (how do they comfort their S/O?)

Vlad is very observant. Much more observant than you think. Even if you try to hide it, he always notices when you’re down and starts a conversation with you. Usually on some random unrelated theme, but it slowly gets you to open up and talking about what’s got you so bothered. He’ll just listen and let you get it out of the system.

Dates. (do they prefer going out or staying in? do they prefer fancy or simple?)

Staying in is a more plausible option in Vlad’s eyes, because you get to relax in privacy together. In public, there is still some level of discomfort that might prevent you from being that affectionate together or having deep personal conversations. Usually you go out on the town, if some of your/Vlad’s friends call you along.

Equal. (are they more dominant or passive?)

Once he really gets comfortable within your relationship, he starts taking initiative and mostly volunteers to make the decisions. However, if you have a more persuasive type of character he’ll probably slow down a bit. It is quite refreshing for him to not have any competitiveness in a relationship.

Family. (do they want to start a family?)

I think, that if you don’t initiate this yourself, it wouldn’t be in his plans. Children are quite complicated creatures and he’s not sure, if he’s cut out to handle one, especially considering that the child in question will be from a completely different world, that he struggles to understand. But if you end up raising a child together, he turns out to be more than a decent father figure.

Goofy. (how serious are they when it comes to a relationship?)

Vlad takes your relationship very seriously. He has rather clear intentions on one day making you a vampire and living together forever. But that doesn’t mean he’s constantly dwelling on it. The best part of having a partner is getting to be laid back and genuinely unwind.

Hugs. (how do they hug?)

Two words: bear hugs. He straight up scoops you up and squeezes the last breath out of your lungs in the most affectionate way possible. Sometimes you have to remind him to be gentler, because he legitimately can crush your ribcage (he won’t though, I promise).

Interests. (what Interests do they want to share with their S/O)

You really inspire Vlad to create. He already creates a lot, but after you appeared, his amount of poetry/art done almost doubled. He doesn’t show you everything he makes. Instead he carefully picks out the best works to present. The other “rejects” will forever stay swept under his coffin or tucked away somewhere in a cupboard.

Jealousy. (do they get jealous?)

Vlad can’t help, but sometimes view your friends as potential rivals. These are just intrusive thoughts, that can never leave his head, even though he knows it’s stupid. He never acts on them, to be sure. But just the feeling itself is very unpleasant to him.

Kiss. (how they kiss/favorite place to be kissed, and vise versa.)

Vlad loves neck/shoulder kisses both on the giving and the receiving end. He finds these especially romantic and intimate. To him, the fact that you let him kiss your neck really shows how much you trust Vladislav to not hurt you. Also, I have to mention that Vlad is probably the best kisser ever, since he had a lot of time to practice.

Love Language.

Quality time is definitely Vlad’s main love language. Nothing shows his love and devotion more than just sitting together for hours and talking about anything and everything. Sometimes you don’t even have to talk. Even being together in one room, being close to each other, it means so much to both of you.

Meals. (kitchen dynamics.)

Vladislav doesn’t cook, obviously, but he’s willing to try for you. He might cook something in your kitchen, using some old recipe he found in Viago’s library and it’s probably going to taste absolutely inedible, but it’s the thought that counts, right? But honestly, with time he actually gets really good and can cook a legitimately tasty meal for you.

Nicknames. (what do they call their S/O?)

He is very straightforward in that way, I think. He either just calls you by your actual name or “My Love” / “Dragostea mea”. He might occasionally use some other pet names like “Darling” / “Lubi”. But overall, sticks to the classics.

Openness. (how open are they about their past/emotions with their S/O?)

Vlad takes his time with opening up to you. He slowly shares random snippets of his thoughts and watches how you react to them. When he knows you well enough, he’ll be completely transparent about his present and past experiences/feelings.

PDA.

He is rather hesitant with public affection. To him this sort of stuff is private, not something to be shared with the world. But simple gestures like holding hands or leaning into each other are totally okay with him.

Quarrel. (how they apologize/ how long it takes them to forgive their S/O?)

It all depends on you. Vladislav is a very proud vampire and even if he knows, that he’s in the wrong, it takes him a while to apologise. If you give him time, he will come around to it on his own, but if you confront him about it really speeds up the process. He doesn’t really hold grudges on you for mundane arguments and forgives you easily.

Rules. (boundaries they have.)

No violence. He’s got enough of that in both his normal and romantic life and he’s sick and tired. Vlad just wants something sweet and peaceful for once and having these aggressive outbursts is the exact opposite of his ideal relationship.

Security. (how protective they are of their S/O.)

Vladislav seems to be a bit more on edge when you are around people he doesn’t know. Even if they are your friends, it takes a while to get him to trust them. He remains very vigilant and observant, as if he’s expecting some kind of a catch. This tension disappears after a bit of time spent with the new people.

Time. (how long does it take to fall for their S/О?)

Vladislav is all about slow burn, I think. Only after he truly gets to know you close he starts to develop romantic feelings. It’s the little parts of your personality that are hidden from most people that really make you special to him and Vlad wants to have this personal connection, before a romantic one.

Upset (what things upset them in a relationship?)

He is really upset, if you are afraid of him. Of course, you’re not terrified. Otherwise you two definitely wouldn’t date. But if you flinch when he gets close to your neck or fidget uncomfortably at the sight of his fangs it makes Vladislav so angry about his own nature. He really wishes he could be human sometimes.

Vacation. (what kind of traveler are they with their S/O?)

Vlad is pretty spontaneous with this sort of stuff. One day he may just wake you up and say you’re going to Transylvania with zero explanation. He does prepare himself for travelling somewhere he has never been before, but it’s usually done by reading books with very very very outdated information, so please do your research too. Don’t let him plan the whole thing by himself.

Words. (promises they make to their S/O.)

He promised to keep you safe. Vladislav has lost way too many close people throughout his existence and he’s not about to let you be one of them. The world is full of dangers both for the living and the undead and if he can provide you any sense of security, he will.

Xenial. (how they make you feel welcome/what makes them feel welcome?)

Every time you walk into the room, you are greeted with this signature toothy grin of his, that just can’t not make your heart swell with warmth. Such a small gesture, but really shows Vlad’s true feelings towards you. And when you reach out to hug him anytime he’s close enough to you to do so, it makes him feel like the most important person in the world.

Yearning. (do they miss their S/O easily? what do they do about it?)

He doesn’t look like someone, who gets separation anxiety… but he does get it. He doesn’t like to be away from you for too long, because it makes him feel lonesome. Sure, his flatmates are still there and that is great, but it’s just not the same feeling. He knows it’s not entirely healthy, but what can you do?

Zzz. (sleeping habits/how they cuddle.)

Vladislav likes, when you lay on top of him. He sleeps in a rather straight position, so he’s stable enough to use him as a second mattress and he just enjoys your weight on top of his chest. It calms him to feel your presence so apparently. If you get cold from his body temperature, he first lays a blanket over himself, then you go on top.

[youredreamingofroo]

Ya'll... I think I might start a new story, I have a... basic concept of what I want it to be like, and I already have a name (under the impression that I don't suddenly do a 180), I just need to do like... all the writing and make the characters LMFAO It's gonna be a little on the dreary side and dark (which is the kind of writing/genre i aspire to write about, also means I'm gonna have to redo my personal reshade that ive been cooking for like... 3 or 4 months... 😭)-

in the meantime, I might start working on gussying up my navi post (and by gussy up, i mean completely redo) because as nice as it is, it's, idk, a little outdated (i guess), I have an idea for a new theme except i'm either going to a) put it in the drafts and wait til I start the new story to post it so the info is all there or b) make it and then post it and when i start the new story, edit it and put the tags and stuff in for the story.

ALSO might do a name change cuz... this name came from WAYYY before i joined simblr, and its got a charm to it, but i dont rlly like it anymore,, it just dont sit with me the same way that it used to lmao

*(writing this after i posted cuz i forgot to say this - its under the cut and in regards to NSB with the new story - it also kinda turned into a rant lmfao) TL:DR for ppl who don't wanna read my stupid fucking rant: NSB is prob gonna go on a hiatus regardless of if i start a new story, cuz as much as I love it, it's started to feel like a chore and less of smth i enjoy (even tho, like I said, I rlly enjoy/love it) Sorry to my NSB enjoyers out there.

regarding NSB, yes it will probably go on hiatus when making this story bec writing is already kinda exhausting for me as well as editing and NSB has progressively became more and more story-driven than gameplay-driven, and especially after these three days, im kinda burnt out from NSB, i know i just left it off on a cliffhanger with the new baby, but to be honest, I don't wanna deal with another child, i barely get by dealing with the four, and dealing with toddlers> are so fucking annoying cuz of the Sim AI, which in and of itself is just demotivating, i do REALLY love not so berry, i love the story ive created with it, but i guess im just tired of playing the same generation for so long, not to mention the fact that i made it a rags to riches challenge, i know i didnt have to but i prefer to, and bc of that, i havent been able to properly decorate, and i dont really wanna go back on myself, if i decide to continue NSB, i will probably take the RTR rules away since its so annoying to deal with having like, 1000 simoleans all the damn time. Also, i've been planning what to do for generation 3 since catty gave birth, but i had to put NSB on a hiatus bc of a stupid glitch and was only recently able to start it up again, and I still havent moved onto the next gen. I kinda lost the plot with that rant, but basically, NSB will probably go on hiatus, regardless of the new story, I've been wanting to dwell more on Roo and his whole story and the people in his universe and after a bit, NSB has started to, as much as I love it and the storytelling and whatever, feel like a chore, which kinda hurts to say, but its true. Sorry to any of my not so berry enjoyers out there

[morroodle]

I am so sad and angry

I really really wanna go to legoland NY now that I know it exists, specifically during one of their special ninjago themed weekends for obvious reasons. It took some convincing my parents and some negotiating (no ninjago hotel room for me ;-;) but I was so excited when my dad said he was booking and then... disaster.

We have tried probably around 30-40 times combined over the course of a week and every single time when we get to the last stage of booking the legoland website just breaks. The payment and confirmation and all the important details are just blank space and it won't work. Refreshing or redoing or any solution we can think of doesn't fix it, we've even tried different computers and a phone but still nothing. I managed to get it working once (I was by myself and also my dad dosent like to spend money through my computer for safety reasons) but I couldn't replicate it, even after another 5 tries

I'm so fucking pissed. All I want is to go to legoland to see my silly little lego ninja and I finally convinced my parents but I fucking can't because of a stupid website. And no we can't even book a hotel and get tickets separately because that's significantly more expensive. I'm running out of time to book and I'm angry and sad.

[impofthegasstation]

i wanna change my blog theme but. i dont fucking know what i am meant to do, i can't code and im terrible at searching up stuff without panicking for some reason. i also wanna redo my about page for some reason id ont know i haven't read it, what if it;'s stupid....

[rottenbrainstuff]

BG3 playthrough - Baldur’s Gate is ENORMOUS

I didn’t think I could be more overwhelmed but somehow this game just keeps getting bigger and bigger. Which is fine, but… my pathetic little mac can’t deal with it. The deeper I get into the city, the worse the gameplay gets, and it’s so bad now, so bad. I wish there was an even more basic barebones graphics level below low.

Spoilers:

The dark urge flavour in the tabernacle was neat. My character left a big donation for the seldarine goddess not out of religious devotion but as a spiteful fuck-you to daddy. I like that Bhaal answers back. Very fun. And Astarion continues in his theme of being grumpy about anything religious. I don’t know, buddy. After he mentioned being thankful that it was my plot that freed him, I can’t help but look at the whole coincidence of it all and wonder if that was the answer to his prayers, even though it took a long time to play out.

I got to Sorcerous Sundries. The thing that upset me the most about Rolan wasn’t his face, it wasn’t the shitty situation he described, no, somehow the thing that upset me the most was that he wasn’t even bothering to be arrogant and rude anymore. It was that little detail that made me feel the worst and made me understand how bad things were. Poor buddy. It’s ok, Aylin broke Lorroakan over her fucking knee. God I love her.

What an irritating fight though. I accidentally brought all squishy spellcasters with me when maybe a good fighter would have been more efficient. (sigh, Lae’zel, I will find you soon, I promise) My tav freshly leveled up to 11 and I finally, FINALLY got OTTO’S IRRESISTABLE DANCE. Ooooooh I’ve been waiting forever for that. I cast it on Lorroakan right at the start and it was great, kept him quiet the entire fight while we chipped away at all his goddamned elementals until we were ready to kick his ass. Oh my god oh my GOD was it ever funny watching him boogie the whole time in the corner, getting angry every turn and threatening us as he did his little shuffle. I laughed and laughed and laughed. BEST SPELL EVER. Can’t wait to use it on Gortash and Orin. Rolan ended up getting the final killing hit in, which made me pleased. I’ve had Shovel summoned and following Astarion ever since I read the scroll mid-act-1, and sadly she got zapped in the fight and I didn’t notice until a few hours later. I could reload and redo the fight to keep her alive, but myeh I dunno, maybe it’s her time. Gale still knows how to summon her if we want her back.

I don’t have patch 6 yet - mac users always have to wait longer - so I don’t get to see the new fight cinematics yet. I assume that once the patch comes out, I’ll be able to load old save slots up and watch it then?...

After that, I was just dicking around and found the whole lower level of the tower and all the stuff that goes with that totally by accident.

I did the whole newspaper quest thingie, and managed to do it mostly by just sneaking really good, only ended up using one single invisibility potion… but I don’t know if my game is bugged or what, I was a bit disappointed, the next morning the quest had succeeded and NPCs talk to me like I’m a celebrity now, but the newspaper wasn’t about me. If I succeed or if I fail, the paper is always just random unrelated headlines. I was wanting a funny and relevant story! :( Ah well. Sneaking through there around the guards was a pain in the ass and a half but I’m low on invisibility potions :( Until I get some more I need to be careful.

The only thing more fun than exploring and finding all the neat little details is doublechecking with my daughter who is also playing, and seeing how much she has MISSED because she just speeds through with no patience for the exploring. Lmao. She’s currently stuck at Shadowheart’s big fight in the House of Grief. I popped down there myself to take a look and shee-it, that is definitely a nasty stupid fight.

Dang there’s so much stuff here in the city though. I honestly can’t even remember all of what I’m supposed to be doing. I’m kind of in the mood to hurry up and get to the Cazador fight, but there’s so much city to explore between here and there. And my computer lags and lags and lags.

[meanscarletdeceiver]

*goes on anon so u dont hate me* .Edward The Really Useful Engine?

Nonny. Why.

Why.

You musta known this was like lobbing a grenade in my inbox, and you must be looking forward to a blithering rant.

Well, I am gonna give you everything you want.

Welcome to the absolute worst fucking episode of what is otherwise, for the standard-gauge boys at least, a perfectly respectable season.

Welcome to clearly-written-by-committee hell.

Welcome to EtRUE.

Warning, in case you haven't already guessed: I am going to continue to indulge in an absolutely unnecessary amount of swearing.

1. This redo of Edward's theme is so sad. We're 10 seconds in and I'm already depressed. The familiar melody tells my dopamine receptors to get ready for action!

But then there's no joy. Dopamine remains unproduced. This muddy, limping rendition actually makes my houseplants start to droop and wither and my dogs start to sigh.

2. Okay, one positive—the bit where we see James scowling and then at the end of the train a smiling Edward pushing from behind and wryly eying the camera as if to say "yeahhhh... he's in one of his Moods..." is actually pretty funny.

It's a sheet of tissue paper in the coming tsunami of awful, but hey. I'm a harsh grader. But I'm fair.

3. WHY. WHY. WHY ARE WE DOING ANOTHER FUCKING STORY ABOUT EVERYONE WRITING OFF EDWARD BECAUSE HE'S OLD.

WE'VE DONE THIS. WE'VE DONE THIS SO WELL THAT NO ONE WILL EVER BE ABLE TO MATCH 'OLD IRON' OR 'EXPLOIT' EVER AGAIN. THERE IS NO WAY TO WIN THIS GAME EVEN IF YOU ARE A COMPETENT WRITER.

WHICH CLEARLY WHOEVER THE HELL SIGNED OFF ON THIS SCRIPT WASN'T.

4. But #3 isn't even the worst point. If you needed that plot, if you really needed it... it could still work. You could have newbies to the island raise this issue again... if you really want to. You could have waited until next season, when the TVS starts adding (gasp!) BR Standards to the fleet. You could have brought back some of those diesel models that you've been underusing so criminally and actually done something with them.

What they DID do is to give this role of "hahaha, let's Mean Girls edward for the lolz" to... the fucking Big Three.

Guys, the Big Three can be stupid but they're not this stupid. They are not gonna set themselves up for yet another bloody round of Hand Edward a Chance to Humiliate Us Again on a Silver Platter.

And even if they WERE, this is just... sad. Even if we ignore RWS, even if we stipulate that TVS exists in one of those weird universes where time pretty much stands still, nevertheless... at some point if you're going to act like the cast are friends you have to! actually! LET THEM ALL BE FRIENDS!! Like, roasting each other is one thing, hell even complaining right in his earshot that your friend got the bloody special everyone wanted and can't even get it started is one thing, Vitriolic Best Buds is a whole tvtropes page, but essentially saying 'omg send him to the bloody scrapyard already,' fuck my life, CAN THE WRITERS NOT SEE HOW THIS IS A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT CATEGORY?

In fact even by the point of 'Exploit' the milder version of this trope was rather tired but we quite rightly don't even notice because that story slapped. Which (spoiler alert) this one doesn't. But the point here is that in the RWS the big three notably, after the 'Exploit,' never go down this road again. They found new bloody targets, like diesels and even (and this is hilarious) Thomas. I can understand why TVS couldn't really use the amazing content of "the big engines start making cracks about how old Thomas is" but seriously. This is just criminally unfair characterisation to the three of them on multiple levels.

Especially Gordon. In this season he's already been designated as the Stupid Ass rather too often even for him... but this is where it clearly goes over the top.

5.

.

..

...

YES HE BLOODY WELL DOES??????????????????????

6. Okay, fine. This is not a railway documentary I'm watching. Moving on.

But it is supposed to be an ensemble series.

So let's go back to that bit of dialogue, shall we? See if you can spot yet another characterisation problem here:

Gordon: Edward is a useless old steampot. He should be retired. Percy: But he doesn't have tyres???? Thomas: *laughing* RE-tired, Percy! 'Retired' means 'taken out of service.'

The idea that Gordon could be having a go at Edward and Thomas is just chillin', kicking his wheels and contentedly giving vocabulary lessons, beggars belief.

The source for this ep is not a magazine story. Even Andrew Brenner (derogatory) did this better, knowing that Thomas's reaction in this scenario would be to clap back at Gordon and immediately start thinking of ways to pay him out.

But here Thomas is just vibing.

(I hate to smear his great name, but sadly the writer credit for this episode is in fact David Mitton.

As said, I suspect the execs, realizing they had a "main character" who'd not actually been an MC in an episode for four seasons, got too involved in this script.)

6. While Thomas is off in la-la land, Percy takes this not-very-quiet whispering campaign against Edward to heart and frets about it to the point where his driver asks what's wrong. Then the driver goes to the Fat Controller and we have yet another WTF moment.

But before we get there, a note about this bit. Percy's concern for Edward is nice. They came so. close. to doing a good here.

Remember when Edward coached Percy on what a deputation was? And how (hilariously) the big engines then strong-armed Percy into (gasp) talking to the Fat Controller about their concerns?

I could have forgiven everything about this episode if they had been smart enough to have Percy decide to present himself to the Fat Controller as a depot-station and to ask that something be done. That would have been such a smart genuinely heartwarming callback.

But we don't do "smart" or "genuinely heartwarming" this episode. Also, we don't do much of "letting the engines have any actual agency" during this entire season.

So fuck us, I guess.

7. The Fat Controller's reaction to hearing that the big engines are talking shit about Edward is almost as unbelievable as Thomas's. "I shall attend to the matter immediately!"

... You will?

The engines shit-talk each other constantly and he's never once intervened. He's concerned about confusion and delay—he's never cared much about their manners towards each other.

But Jobes, it's Edward who never says a truly mean word, this is a clear-cut case of bullying.

So???? This isn't new!!!!!! Big engines have been running down Edward for the entire franchise so far!!!!! As I complained above!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, but fine. I can accept some explanations here. Maybe no one usually brings this stuff to his attention. Or maybe he's as sick of the "mwahaha Edward is so old and weak" trope as I am and he just snapped and decided he never wanted to have to deal with this shit ever again?

Fine.

So, what would a sane, normal man do? He could just go and scold the big engines, who adorably tend to turn into blushing little kittens when this dude who is one-sixth their height wags a finger at them. If that doesn't suffice, he could stick Gordon on banking for a while? Or just lock them in a shed with a projector showing 'Old Iron' on repeat for as many days as it takes for them to remember that their complaints are fucking idiotic?

No. He decides to show the big engines that they should stop complaining about their colleagues' services by... replacing Edward with Duck.

What. The actual. Hell.

8. Unsurprisingly, when the big engines hear this, they seem to feel themselves utterly vindicated. Edward has been replaced on banking, and by a significantly stronger engine.

Yeah, Topham. That'll show 'em.

9. As an intermission before the (in)glorious climax to this growing dumpster fire of a plot, FC sends Edward to... show Stepney how to run his branch line.

Yes, you read that right.

FC has finally acquired (so it seems?????) one engine who in fact has loads more experience than Edward and he's like "you know what, you should go show this youngster the ropes. i mean, you know those Terriers, famously incompetent at everything."

I. am going. to start. THROWING THINGS.

10. The scene where FC actually gives Edward these orders is utterly unnecessary. This lil' exchange could all have been paraphrased by the narrator, freeing up valuable and much-lacking screentime for the triumphant climax. However, I suppose it DID give Edward a chance to... say a line.

The titular character gets two lines in "his" entire episode.

Because this plot is more convoluted than the footpaths of Cairo. That's why.

So I take that back. The scene wasn't unnecessary. The story would have felt really stupid if Edward hadn't even properly appeared until the end...

Oh wait. The story feels really stupid anyway.

To give credit where credit is due, at least Edward is perfectly in-character. (Meaning he's damn near the only one in this episode who is.)

11. Here, meditate for a moment on a happier world where instead of this shitty story we instead got an episode about Edward and Stepney's time working together:

Would it have been a very quaint, low-stakes episode? Probably revolving around a slightly grumpy passenger or perhaps a sweet mummy bird making a nest in a coach's brakepipe or something else idyllic-ly Christopher Awdry-esque?

Yeah.

But it would have been wholesome and fresh and and it could not have possibly have been stupider than the episode we actually got.

This is actually the bit that makes me think that Mitton's original script got chopped up by a production committee acting like hacksaw-crazy mad doctors. Because it makes me wonder if that Mitton's primary goal in this whole episode was to establish that Stepney now has a branch line firmly on the Fat Controller's railway. It's unclear whether it is 'the bluebell line' and he's just retconning it to be part of the same railway as the rest of the cast or whether he's just quietly transferred Stepney so that they no longer need excuses to keep bringing him back.

Anyway I think this literally the most interesting aspect: just this random interlude where Mitton is establishing some Lore that he clearly wanted to use in future stories.

Too bad we never got them, and instead future writers decided to ignore the opening to use a lot more of Stepney in favor of just rewriting Big Engines Talking Shit About Eddie AGAIN.

12. In a very convenient scene, Duck is conveniently overwhelmed by the trucks as a convenient way to try to force the plot to move forward again.

In a better episode I would accept that Sometimes Things Just Happen, but I'm not feeling too tolerant after the last three minutes of torment.

DUCK? THE TRUCKS GETTING THE BETTER OF DUCK?

SINCE?

BLOODY?

WHEN?

Above: an engine who is about to sue David Mitton for libel

13. I will admit, I legitimately enjoy the trucks' taunting song. Is it incredibly stupid?

🎶🎶🎶 DUCK SHOULD PLAY WITH OTHER DUCKS COZ HE'S NO GOOD AT PULLING TRUCKS! 😆😆😆

Yes.

But it is the trucks, so their 2 seconds in the limelight at least feel 100% on-point.

14. Maybe when Gordon starts pushing Duck's train we'll get a call-back to 'Double Header' ("Get on, you!!!!")?

No?

It just feels like Gordon would have been cursing Duck out around now.

#LetGordonSayBother

15. Soooooo, for some reason... Edward is available to help? Instead of being on Stepney's branch?? He's just chilling at Wellsworth??? What, having a nap while Duck did his work????

*beat*

Sure. Fine...

Again giving credit where credit is due, at least when Edward is called to help get two stranded trains started again, we don't have to do any of the HiT/early!Brennaisance bullshit song-and-dance about 'ohhhhhhhh, but 😢 i don't know 🥺 if i'm 👉👈 strong enough to do that.. 😢. 😢'

Like I said, I will freely own Edward is 100% in-character throughout this terrible viewing experience. Classic RWS stuff ("I'll come and try!")

Too bad that, despite the title, he's essentially an ascended extra.

16. Okay, thus far the episode was just kind of a meandering mess of odd ideas. In the final minute here, it runs out of the road of Mediocre and vrooms over the cliff of Painfully Bad.

First of all, the big climax is a nothingburger, cinematically speaking. It's been implied heavily that this is difficult, but it's not shown.

One of the weaknesses throughout this season has been that—I don't know how to describe it—the models all seem to be in too short a gear? They start and they stop soooooo quickly that they seem like toys rather than engines. Get the fuck out of my face with But, hur dur dur, they ARE— No. A combination of taking the movements to and from a stop slowly, as well as great chuffing and braking sound effects, used to give these moments a verisimilitude that is sorely lacking here. It's been a problem throughout Season 6, and it becomes egregious in rescue scenes. It made Douglas rescuing Donald anti-climactic. And it makes this anticlimactic too.

Look at some of the great parallel scenes in seasons past. Henry's wheels locked up as Thomas pushes with all his might. Henry's wheelslip when he starts the Flying Kipper. Gordon's difficulty and heavy chuffing in rescuing Thomas from the mine.

Here Edward just ✨ l'arrives✨ and, quicker than you can say "c'mon, lads, let's get on with it!" he's already got "the strange train" moving.

I have a terrible suspicion that someone thought that the effortlessness would make the moment more impressive?

I have an equally terrible suspicion that someone got lazy and thought that they could make the scene Cool by all the rubbish surrounding it instead of by the moment itself?

17. Which brings us to All the Rubbish Surrounding It.

I think the idea for the end of this was meant to be slap Gordon around with a good ol'-fashioned Humiliation Conga Line. Which, legit. Trust me, after the season he's had, he's earned one and so have we.

But the writers didn't understand how to pull one off. It's supposed to be funny.

They went in for "earnest and preachy" instead... very different thing.

I cringed so fucking hard.

Give me "The Fat Controller pointed angrily at the clock" anyday.

(Speaking of whom, hope he palmed Stevie here a tenner after that lil' moment, as was surely pre-arranged...)

18.

Real True Transcription of Me Hissing at the Television:

Show???... don't tell??...

Show! Don't Tell!

SHOW!

DON'T!

TELL!!!

They're kids, David. Your target viewers are kids. This doesn't mean they're categorically idiots.

19. Okay, but at least they got the whole excessively morality-tale thing out of their system...

Fuckin' 'ell!

20.

It's a bad sign when a fucking internet parody author, who thought it would be a laugh to make a fanfic out of the series but have a lot more jokes about cigarettes, wee, and railway sex, was able to make the "apology scene" scene 10000% more emotionally compelling than it went down in canon.

Without even changing a word of the (shitty, shitty) dialogue.

But here we are, not in the warmth of Fandomland, but in cold hard reality. Yes, yes. We get it. Edward is ssooo self-effacing. Certainly he would never needle Gordon the Big Eng...

... oh. Wait.

21. Well, at least it's over. They can't possibly kick us in the 'nads again in the last 4 seconds—

The WHAT??

Wait.

THE PLAN??????

What a mind-screw right before we cut to the theme song, y'all. A reasonable viewer would have interpreted STH's "plan" as just... sending Edward somewhere else. A shitty plan, but at least not an actual plothole.

You mean to tell me, narrator, that the whole "Edward proved he was more reliable than Duck (DUCK!!!!!??????)" bit was according to STH's plan?

That. makes. no. bloody. sense!!!

STH figured the rigors of the job would make Duck stall out?

First of all, it seems shitty to set up Duck (totally fucking innocent in all this) as a goat.

But also this 'plan' is as unrealistic as it was unkind.

DUCK?

THE FUCKING GWR 5700??

NOTABLY WITH THIRTY YEARS' LESS WEAR AND A GOOD 10,000 LBF ON EDWARD????

I DON'T UNDERSTAND???????

I get Edward is Ol' Reliable himself, but the notion that if you sub in Duck sooner or later the engines will beg you for Edward back to help them is absolutely absurd.

At this point, I stomp furiously on this trashcan of an episode and then kick the resulting tin pancake as hard as I can. Hopefully it will get burned up in the ozone layer and never return to darken the face of this earth again.

22. Well, at least the TVS got it out of their system, promised that the conflict of Doubting Edward would be laid to rest, and will surely find new and better material for #2 going forwar—

OH

C'MONNNNNN!!!!

[jadequeen88]

Smart Girls Make Fast Learners

NSFW 18+ ONLY. MINORS WILL BE BLOCKED!

My contribution to the BNHarem’s monthly collab. The theme was SEx work. ⛓This piece is a first real deep dive into darker themes and was actually really, really exciting to write. 🖤 A massive thanks to my dear friend @libiraki​ for beta reading this.

TW: yandere behavior, toxic relationship, degradation, non-con, dub-con, degradation/praise kinks, mind break, oral (M and F receiving), over stim, loss of virginity, mentions of physical violence.

DISCLAIMER: I do not condone this type of relationship. This is a work of fiction and if this happens IRL please get out of the relationship!

There is a very specific type of dread that occurs when you discover that the person you built your world around has been lying to you. Tamaki Amajiki was experiencing this brand of betrayal for the first time in his twenty-one years on a rainy Tuesday in October in the dim lighting of your dorm room. His grip tightened around the open laptop as he stared at glimpses of flesh in the thumbnails of the many, many videos posted to the site. Previous live streams with thousands of views. He gulped down the bile in his throat as he scrolled through the videos. His shock and disgust morphed into a pure rage as he counted up the live streams that you’d had since first kissing him. 12. There had been twelve. Three times a week for the past four weeks. 

Those big doe eyes that looked into his eyes as you tentatively licked the tip of his cock for the first time… mere hours later they were rolling in the back of your head as you got off for strangers on the internet. He couldn’t take it. You were his first… everything… he knew that you hadn’t been innocent in your past. The way your tongue expertly wound around his when you first kissed him amongst your plush pillows and goose-down comforter reminded him of the fact. The low violet LED lighting of your bedroom made him feel like the two of you were in your own ethereal world. He could forgive you for not waiting for him as he’d waited for you. 

For the past four years, he kept to the shadows. He was there when the football player from freshman year cheated on you with one of your terrible friends (and when it happened the second, third, fourth time). He was there to binge your favorite shows with you (“*insert current guy you were fucking* just doesn’t get it, he’s not into it. I’m so glad I’ve got you to watch it with!”) He bit back the heartache that would wash over him when you’d pet him and coo over him… you didn’t see him as a man. He wanted to bend you over and prove he could fuck your brains out. He KNOWS he’d be perfect for you. But he never rejected the attention. He smiled and accepted whatever crumbs fell from your table. Whether it be helping you study or letting you complain about your shitty friends or your shitty jock boyfriends or your shitty parents… He gave and gave and gave… until that one day, 35 days ago to be exact, a shift in the tide occurred.

 ⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

“So why don’t you have a girlfriend, Tama-kun?”

“Wh-wha?”

Tamaki dropped the pencil he’d been using and before he could bend to get it himself, your hand was on his thigh and he was putty in your grasp. You giggled and cooed over him like you always did, but this time you did it while assaulting his mouth and neck with your skilled tongue. This time, for the first time, you made Tamaki feel like a man. Like YOUR man.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

Over the next few weeks, Tamaki had become quite skilled in pleasing a woman. It only took a little guidance to have him sucking at your clit with just the right amount of pressure. He learned on his own how to couple that with his long, delicate fingers twisting and pumping in and out of your slick hole. You’d cling to his silky hair, pulling him closer as a constant stream of praise tumbled from your lips:

“No one has ever made me feel this good.”

“Your fingers are perfect Tama-kun”.

“I love your mouth on me so much, baby.”

The first time you came on his face, Tamaki knew there was a god because he’d found heaven between your thighs.

But that was gone now… ripped away with one mouse click on the night he was going to finally give you his virginity. He had held on to it like it was a treasure. A treasure he’d present to you one day wrapped up in life-long devotion and worship... But Tamaki wasn’t in heaven anymore. He wasn’t going to worship you tonight. For the first time since laying eyes on you, Tamaki wanted to hurt you.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

You turned the shower off and dried yourself. Wiping the condensation from the mirror, you couldn’t help but smile at your reflection. You felt like this was going to be the first time giving your body to someone. Tonight was a redo. You were wiping the slate clean. Your first time would no longer be underneath the football captain in the passenger seat of his truck, left feeling sore and unsatisfied. It was going to be with the guy you should have noticed long ago. It would be soft and slow… passionate and filled with sweet words and caresses… limbs tangled in soft sheets that smell like lavender and vanilla. 

You applied your lotion and moisturized your face. The red lace adorning your body was arranged perfectly, accentuating the soft swell of your hips and chest. With one last glance in the mirror and adjustment of your bra, you opened the door to the cool air of your dorm room…

...And saw Tamaki looking murderous. 

His eyes slowly left the screen to meet your gaze. His tear-stained face had never looked this harsh. His normally sweet eyes were narrowed and red from crying. The sweet lips you’d licked and sucked with such tenderness were hard and cold as they pulled upward in a grimace.

The only thing he said before rising from the bed and setting aside your laptop was your camgirl username. Then he was on you before you could draw a breath to explain.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

Tamaki always thought he liked you best on top of him showering him with kisses and threading your fingers through his hair, but he had to admit… having your arms tied to a bed frame with the silky sash of your bathrobe cutting into your skin was doing things to him. When you sniffled, face stained with tears and snot, his dick twitched in his boxers. The whines you were choking back behind the silky red panties stuffed down your throat sent chills up his spine. You had to learn the hard way not to spit them out after a harsh slap echoed against your skin when you fought back the first time.

Tamaki stood back to survey the mess of skin, spit, and tears for a moment. You were a blank canvas for him to mark up with his rage and lust. You tried to hide away your bare pussy by clenching your thighs together. It only spurred him on.

“Do you have any clue what you’ve done?” he hovered over you, sleek muscles rippling over your own soft body, “I waited, and waited, and WAITED,” he bit down on the side of your exposed neck and you screamed behind the silky gag, trying your best not to expel it from your mouth and receive more punishment.

“I want to give you everything, Y/N,” he licks over the bite, almost apologetically, “I don’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want it to happen like this… FUCK, why?! Why did you ruin this?” his long fingers dug into your cheeks as he forced you to meet his fiery gaze. You couldn’t help whimpering and sniffling back more clear runny snot. You were so humiliated at how disheveled and disgusting you must look. His head ducked into the soft spot between your neck and shoulder and you felt him sob. 

Despite the abuse he’d inflicted upon you in the last ten minutes, you nuzzled your cheek into the top of his head in an attempt to comfort him. And he let you… he hated himself for it and he hated you for making this all so hard for him.

“No… no, no, no,” he rose from the bed to set up your ring-light and laptop, ice running through your veins at the sight. Your mind couldn’t accept what was about to happen.

“I’m... I’m not letting you get away with this,” he shook his head and pulled at his hair as he finished setting everything up, “If you’re insisting on being a slut, you’ll be MY slut. And everyone will know…” he jerked your ankle to force you flat on your back.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

Maybe if he’d let the gag out of your mouth, you’d be able to tell him this was just a job to you. That it was clinical… that he was the only one who had ever been able to get you off, that his face was the only one you’d come on… that you needed the money since your parents had disowned you…

But you only laid there, accepting whatever he was going to dish out. You knew he was hurt. You weren’t stupid. You overlooked him while knowing how he felt about you. It took years of horrible one-night stands and countless frat parties pretending that whatever guy you’d picked that night was interesting for you to come to your senses. You hated yourself for being so blind for so long… You adored Tamaki, truly. And you hated yourself for all the times you’d hurt him… so you swallowed your fear and tried to prepare yourself for whatever came next.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

Any soft parts of Tamaki that you’d grown to love were gone, hardened by heartache and desperation. After angling the laptop to get the perfect shot, he started the live stream countdown. Subscribers started trickling in, commenting on how this was a pleasant surprise since it wasn’t one of your regularly scheduled streams. You shut your eyes to pretend this wasn’t real.

Without fanfare or warning, Tamaki ripped apart your thighs, exposing your bare slit. A raw shrill was pulled from your lungs, your back arching from the sting of an abrupt slap. Neurons fired off in your brain… were you in pain? Was it pleasure?

“Since my girlfriend likes to keep secrets from me, I can’t trust what comes out of her whore mouth,” he emphasized his point by stuffing his fingers past your lips, pushing the soaked silk further into your throat, “So she’s going to keep this gag right here until I can fuck the truth out of her,” he trailed his fingers along your reddened folds. Were you getting wet? Horror and shame blossomed in your chest. The fact that you were growing aroused wasn’t lost on Tamaki. His foreign, sadistic grin was back… aimed directly into your soul.  

“So that’s what you like, huh?” His nails bit into your thighs leaving tiny crescents behind, “I’ve been too nice? Too soft?” He pushed your thighs impossibly wide, the stretch causing you to moan. He hovered over your core, onyx orbs blown wide with a mix of hate and lust. Tamaki looked like the devil himself and you wondered just how fucked up you were for wanting his punishment.

He opened his mouth and lolled out his tongue, never severing the desperate gaze you both shared, his intertwined with hunger, yours with fear. You’d never noticed how long and thick his tongue was and couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel caressing every ridge and crevice of your inner walls. He flattened the warm, wet muscle and pressed it along your slit. As he slowly slid it closer and closer to your burning clit, you whimpered and bucked your hips chasing the pleasure you knew he was capable of giving… but this was not your sweet boy and he wasn’t doing any of this for your pleasure.

He slung his arm over your lower stomach and growled into your drenched lips. You were pinned down, helpless against his torturous tongue. Fresh tears pricked at your eyes as you remembered how he’d let you pet him and buck into his face, how sweetly he’d ease you into a gentle release. Not this time… it was all teeth and sharp sucks, his tongue forcing you open violently. You were being shoved over a cliff and despite the horror and violence of what was happening to you. You were approaching an orgasmic state at record speed. Tamaki caught on and doubled down. The arm that wasn’t pinning you into the mattress pulled your leg down straight, your knee in a death grip. The new angle made the sensations even more intense. His face pressed harder into your core and you noticed that at some point, he’d started weeping, small sobs vibrating against your skin. The overwhelming mix of emotions and the vigor in which he was eating you shoved you over the edge.

He kept going along at the same speed with the same determination through your orgasm until it became painful. You pushed past it as best you could, allowing him to sob into your over-sensitive skin until he had his fill. As the pain started intermingling with pleasure, your legs shook and the gag couldn’t hold your screams back any longer. You released against his tongue once more, both of you sobbing. He laid against your thigh for what felt like an eternity before he lifted himself to lay on top of you, his hip bones digging into your soft thighs. You could feel the bulge through the thin material of his boxer briefs. Your hips rose to meet it, a pleading gesture filled with the desire to comfort and please him. Your eagerness encourages his mercy, there’s a meek cry that leaves your lips when the damp silk slips from between your teeth.

“Please baby… I’m so, so sorry I didn’t tell you…” your voice was as weak as a kitten’s cry and Tamaki couldn’t deny it made his heart (his dick) clench.

“Say it…” his lips were close enough to kiss, but you resisted… fearful of what he’d do if you did.

“Say what, Tama?” your eyes were wide with concern and confusion. You were desperate to please him.

He turned your face to the camera that you’d forgotten was there and the gravity of the situation crashed around you again. New tears leaked from your stinging eyes as Tamaki whispered into your ear.

“Say that you’re a lying whore…”

“I..I’m a lying whore…”

The last syllable broke as your abused throat grew accustomed to speaking again. He rewarded you with a soft kiss to your cheek and your eyes closed at the tender gesture. The familiar pain in your chest welled to the surface causing even more tears to escape.

“And tell everyone that you’re my own personal slut”

You repeated the phrase to the audience behind the screen and he hummed with approval, trailing one finger along your wet cheek. 

“Good girl…” the praise sent shivers through your wrecked body.

“And tell them from now on, your boyfriend will be the only one making you come… that they only get to see you be HIS slut.”

You noticed the chat going absolutely haywire at your announcement. Before Tamaki shut your laptop, you realized you’d made three times as much as you’d ever made before and a twisted sense of accomplishment filled your cloudy mind.

“Please,” your voice came out in a croak, “Please untie me. I wanna make it up to you,” his clothed bulge was burning into your core and you could tell he was close to breaking.

“Please let me make you feel good. I’m so, so sorry,” the clench of your thighs around his waist made him whimper.

He reluctantly pulled away to sit on the foot of the bed. The way he curled in on himself hugging his knees made him appear so small, so fragile… a complete change from the man who’d just manhandled you into restraints.

“You’re a liar…” you almost didn’t hear the whisper, his face buried into his knees.

“Please!” you were losing feeling in your hands and all you wanted was to be free to comfort him.

His eyes met yours and it was your Tamaki again... Your sweet boy… the snarling, green beast that threatened to devour you was sleeping now after it reached its fill of violence. He crawled over your body and released your restraint. Before you even regained feeling in your hands, you wrapped your arms around him. You littered his collarbone with sweet kisses and apologetic sobs. He began to melt into your affectionate gestures and you wrapped your legs around his waist pulling him impossibly close. Wet lips met and your tongues fought against each other for dominance. Hips began to roll against each other, increasing pressure until you both gasped. 

The violence was gone, but this was still not a gentle coupling like you’d been planning. Tamaki pulled away and freed his straining cock from his boxers. The skin-to-skin contact made your eyes roll back into your skull. You felt his long fingers grasp your throat, squeezing to remind you just how powerful they were. You shuddered in response, arching upward into his touch, chasing that high his dominance was giving you.

With one swift motion, Tamaki speared you onto his cock. With the minimal prep he’d given you, the stretch was agonizing. This was by far the largest cock you’d ever taken and it stole your breath from your aching lungs. You moaned earning a visceral reaction from the boy on top of you.  

Tamaki stayed as still as he could. He refused to come so soon… not when he’d waited so long for this. He tightened his grip on your throat and tentatively rocked his hips into yours. It didn’t take long for it to progress into the most frantic love-making you’d ever experienced.

There was no other way to describe it, he was hate fucking you… biting and sucking your chest until blood bloomed under your skin… hammering into your sore, sticky cunt with total abandon… he was using you like a toy, taking out all his frustrations on your body.

It was ecstasy.

When his hips stuttered as he met his release, the spasms of his tip against your gummy walls sent you into a painful orgasm. You were spent and it seemed like he was too. Your fingers twitched over the crown of his head, wanting to run your fingers through his hair but too scared to initiate any contact with him. As if he could read your mind, he grabbed your hand and placed it on his head. You sighed and began carding through the tangles, gently undoing them. You felt a stream of tears running down your chest as you worked your fingers through his strands. Lifting his face gently, you met his teary gaze with your own.

“Don’t…” he drew in a shuddering breath, “ever lie to me like that again…” the monster behind his eyes stirred quietly, a malicious glint in his eye, before shifting back into your gentle boyfriend. 

“Never, I swear to you, baby…” he lets you lift his chin gently to meet your lips. His eyes close and he sighs into your kiss. His muscles relax and when his eyes open again, his warm, adoring expression falls over your face. The hand that wanted to choke the life out of your eyes minutes ago now caresses your jaw tenderly,

“I trust you…” his lips turn up into a grin that’s just a little too wide, “Because you’re a smart girl, aren’t you?” his top lip brushed against your still trembling bottom lip…

“Y-yes…”

You were fucked. This whole situation was fucked up and you weren’t blind to the fact. But as Tamaki nuzzled into your neck placing soft kisses and whispering praises into your skin, you let yourself bask in the gentleness of the moment…

Because you were a smart girl and smart girls learn their lessons quickly... 

[leoalvarez-clowncarcommittee]

My Thoughts on Chase x Leo

Well I figure I should make this post eventually and Blurry just started playing on my playlists so I figured now’s a good time. Spoilers below! Leo is extremely obsessive and has violent tendencies. He isn’t a good person to date. The only times he comes even remotely close to snapping out of this is in Jenna’s and his route. He still should never date Chase again. Even with the Hum and paranormal stuff making his negative emotions worse, by his own words, it still originated for him. I still empathize and sympathize with him. Hearing him say he cried every day for almost two years straight BROKE him and me, specifically after having to leave him.

This experience combined with the hysteria finally made him realize. He knows he shouldn’t even talk to Chase (for both of their sakes). Him confronting and banishing his Tulpa finally made him realize that shit was fucked and even if he has feelings he knows it’s to late and there’s to much baggage in his own head. His own credits theme even says while he wants to redo it he knows he cant and while it still hurts, it’s not going to change. On to Chase. Now, we learn in Tj’s and Flynn’s route that Chase definitely isn’t all positive vibes. But even fairly attributing his actions IN Echo (the town) to the big bad, I do believe three of the four worse things he ever did, was outside of echo, and thus outside of the big bad’s influence (supported in Jenna’s route whilst in Payton at the diner). Going through with the cheating prank, and then telling Leo his plans right after, specifically to hurt Leo, was done in Payton during his school lunch break. And honestly, the most fucked up thing at all, that IMO, when factored in with the paranormal, gives Leo SO MUCH SLACK (except for the events on his route and the violence) is that Chase would always thirst text him. Constantly, the whole time at Pueblo.

Leo acting touchy and feely at the motel, and thinking he should win Chase a prize to be his man at the amusement park makes complete sense because CHASE TOLD HIM HE WANTS THAT STILL. Him grouping and touching Chase at the mall in Jenna’s route is because Chase said that’s what he wants. Chase never let go, he fueled his fire with his own baggage, and Leo being ~such~ a mess is as much Chase’s fault as it is Leo’s. It’s not even a ‘victim’ blaming situation. Chase isn’t a victim of any domestic abuse, their only one grade year apart in age so that’s definitely not a ‘problematic’ issue, and Chase dealt as much bullshit as Leo did while together, and WAY WAY more when apart it turned out. In Leo’s route, I think he realized this. It’s why he didn’t want to give Chase his new number. He didn’t need Chase texting him, asking to play around again every time him and Kudzu have a single argument or every time Chase would drink. Leo needed to be broken, Chase was broken, and they both know their actions led to everything being broken.

Leo’s worst act mirrors Chase’s, and even then Chase did more truly messed up stuff. In the short, patreon exclusive story, when Leo break’s Chase’s phone (his second worse act IMO) it’s revealed that Leo thought he had his own phone in his hands. He was lashing out in anger but not intentionally to break Chase’s things.

Now... on to why I still ‘ship’ them and why it’s my PFP. It’s because it’s messed up crazy. Them both being complete bastards is so real and raw. Young gay kids do some stupid shit and so much drama and grief is displayed in their relationship. It’s doomed fate, a tragedy unfolding across timelines. They’re both carnal in their desires, they’re both romantic in their desires. It’s like a horror show, like watching two trains collide into each other at full speed. Fascinating and grotesque. When you pull away the supernatural it’s still ugly.

When trying to look at the past, it’s beautiful, a fairy tale scenario. Your childhood friend likes you, the same way you like him. It’s so scary and wrong to them to be who they are, and they find the perfect comfort and empowerment and safety in each other. But echo is a series of tragedies. This one is as ugly and horrid as the rest, but what ‘could have been’ or Who “We” Used to Be is such a compelling narrative, that celebrating the positive and showcasing the negative is something I cant help but do

[clotpole-art]

Retrospective: Illustrated Merlin Alphabet Challenge

Finally finished the Merlin Alphabet Challenge, so here's the artist notes no one asked for! See below the cut for comments on each piece by order of creation. Be warned folks, it's a long post.

Before we begin: credit to @merlin-gifs for the challenge, which can be found here. It's awesome, go do it.

First thing you should know is I did probably 80-90% of these while on phone calls or in Zoom meetings and that's reflected in the simplicity of most pieces -- the compositions aren't complicated, the lines aren't refined, the coloring is slapdash. If you noticed variation in quality of the pieces, that's why!

Second: I tried to focus on trying something new for each drawing. Didn't always happen, but this challenge did succeed in helping me push me out of my own comfort zone.

Without further ado...

A is for Arthur Pendragon

Textures, baby! Brushed metal of his armor, scratchy linen texture of his shirt, wispy softness of hair and skin. I'd recently gotten my tablet out of storage after a year of figuring out where the hell I was going to live and this was one of the first pieces of digital art I spent time on. Glad it was Arthur kicking us off!

B is for the Beginning of the End (1x08)

Fun fact, I did not draw this with my tablet. I drew it with my work computer's touchscreen. It was awful, would not recommend.

C is for Camelot

I wanted to get used to different brushes, so landscape of the castle it was! There are brushes that help with drawing grass; I did not use said brushes and my wrist hurt afterward. That being said, I really enjoyed working on this and it was one of the few pieces I didn't do while multitasking.

D is for Daegal

Also drawn on my work computer's touchscreen, not my tablet. I didn't learn my lesson from B and the experience was even worse. This is my least favorite piece which sucks because it's Daegal so I'm slated to redo this sometime in the near future. Gotta do our boy justice.

E is for Elyan

Oh, I adored drawing this. Elyan often gets shafted in terms of fandom appreciation so I made sure to choose Elyan for this prompt and to participate in the Elyan fest. Plus, I love a good ghost story and figuring out a way to include the druid spectre was fun. Didn't multitask on this piece because Elyan deserved my full attention.

F is for Freya

Ho boy. This piece. I have such mixed feelings on this drawing. Really really didn't like it after I'd decided it was done and very nearly scrapped the whole thing. I had a vision in my head that I just couldn't render into reality and it frustrated me SO MUCH. Looking back, I like it much better than I did when I first created it.

G is for Gwaine

What can I say, he's pretty when he's cold. I didn't stretch too much with this one -- it's my normal drawing style, I was just trying to find a brush that mimicked the softness of pencil.

H is for Hunith

Another one that didn't stray too far from my comfort zone. I was stupid sick and slammed at work, so a motherly Hunith manifested herself. I blame the bad brush choice on the cold medicine.

I is for Isolde

I woke up and chose violence! Tried to vary my figure drawing style a little in this piece but my brain resisted, resulting in... this. Not mad at it, but not happy with it either. Poor Isolde.

J is for Juggling

Ah, this lovely piece was drawn during a particularly vexing meeting at work. Fun fact, there's another version of this line art that's less about Merlin's stress and more about mine.

K is for Knights of Camelot

Continuing the theme of doodling through bad news and shit meetings. Like I said above, normally meeting doodles aren't complex because I'm concentrating on something else. This one was more involved because I didn't want to concentrate on the meeting. I have a few issues with this from a technical standpoint (perspective, my nemesis) but it's still one of my favorites. Tried some funky coloring technique, didn't hate it.

V is for Vibrant Colors

And here is where we said fuck the rules and started going out of alphabetical order! This one was really fun to do and I loved kicking off Albion Party with this as my first submission. The colors were a challenge (as I hoped they would be) and this is the first time I had to do some color tweaking midway though and after finishing the coloring process. Vibrant Arthur, my beloved. This started as a multitask doodle but took dedicated time to finish.

O is for Old Religion

The concept for this one was buzzing in my head for a bit before a quote-prompt solidified it. I adore the thought of more visible, tangible representations of Merlin as the son of the elements, of "magic itself" -- not just sun-gold eyes, but sea-water hair and sandstone-skin. A complement to the vibrant Arthur portrait.

S is for Sorcerers

When I said I wanted to challenge myself, I wasn't kidding. Ho boy, this was fun but frustrating. I wanted to completely illustrate a gif. So I did. Will I do something like this again? Maybe. A while from now.

M is for Morgause

See above -- same illustrated gif style so at least I was able to reuse some drawings. Poor Morgause ended up looking a little wretched here because I was mentally done with this when I was drawing her. Love the concept of tarot cards + Merlin but others are doing it so I won't continue this series.

Z is for Zzzz

This one was specifically done to test out some custom brushes I made in Krita to make abstract background drawing easier for me. I think they turned out well! Plus who doesn't love bb iridescent Aithusa.

L is for Leon, P is for Percival

Quick, minimal doodles of the boys! Mentally, I was going for a Brady's-style retro ensemble cast TV show credits feel. Not mad at it! Some boys look closer to their actors than others (I think my brain broke drawing Percy, my apologies to Tom Hopper).

T is for Tristan

It wasn't until after I posted this that I realized there was more than one Tristan in Merlin. Could have drawn Isolde's bf but I drew Ygraine's dumb jock undead brother instead. Had some fun with dark greys and blacks here regardless.

Q is for Queen Annis

Best royal in Albion, bar none. I tried a different coloring technique here and I kinda like it! may make it my go-to but we'll see. Old habits are hard to break. Also: our queen deserved more badass clothes.

X is for Arthur X Merlin

Oh, be still my shipper heart. Doodled and colored during a meeting. I had hoped to spend more time on it outside of multitasking but alas, work is a bitch. This one is slated for a rework sometime in the future; I adore the concept too much to let it go without creating another version of this that isn't an utter mess.

U is for Uther's Ward

And here's my attempt at forgoing line art. Not fun, do not like.

Y is for Young Warlock

Channeled some pain into this one. Those are the dead eyes of someone who had been told that he'd succeeded when his friend died. That the destiny he'd been expecting to carry on his shoulders into old age was done and dusted before he turned 30. Grief plus the existential dread of the aimless immortal. Oof. One of my favs.

N is for Nimueh, R is for Rising Sun, W is for Will

And we end on this sorry offering. I was away from home for a while without my tablet and I just got tired of waiting. So, pen doodles at the airport. This was a challenge in its own right because 1. pen only and 2. I wasn't able to pull Netflix up for a reference on the fly. Which is why Will's face is obscured and Nimueh looks.... not like Nimueh lol.

In summary: this was a goddamn joy to do. I finished 26 letter prompts in approximately 21 weeks, which exceeded my own unspoken goal of filling one letter per week. I found a good, happy corner of the Merlin fandom after a years-long hiatus away from being a fandom creator. If you did make it this far with me, thanks for reading my inane comments and giving this little project even a moment of your time -- I'm so grateful.

[thesimperiuscurse]

THE CHALLENGE — show a certain part of your story process based on you being tagged by other creators. 

Thank you @herpixels for tagging me in your wonderful challenge! Here’s a behind-the-scenes essay for En Pointe ❤

WRITING PROCESS — show us a part of your script or explain how you write your scenes. do you write in screenplay format or novel format?

I write in novel format, and have a very methodical process. I have a Planning Notebook which covers all the general elements of the story; cast list + descriptions, main plot, themes, overviews of all chapters, timeline, world + settings information, research links, and a massive section with all my notes on relationships, character styles, history, writing goals, arcs, and most crucially, what to avoid from the absolute fucking mess of Fallen Angels. 

At the smaller scale, before writing, I plan out each chapter in my Chapter Workbook. First is the Outline, which is a synopsis of the main events. Going off that, I write a list of Chapter Shots which describes in writing all the pictures; what kind of shot it is (long, over-the-shoulder, etc), the location + atmosphere, and what the characters are doing. Corresponding to these I list the Poses, for each character and what expression they have. I then write a To Do List for what sets to build, new sims to make, number of poses to create, the cc I have to find or make. The final section is Details, which notes down all the little things I have to remember; running gags, nuances, and themes; current state of relationships and character arcs to keep track of their development; what my aims are for character perceptions + issues I need to fix from the last chapter. This section is super important to make sure the story unfolds smoothly and revelations make sense, or else I get something abrupt like Mako x Raven, because I didn’t foreshadow clearly or early enough in advance. Here are snippets of what this looks like:

Once I finish all this planning (the current word count of the two documents is 20k lmfao), then I begin writing. It’s a lot less structured because I just start with the most exciting scenes or ones I’ve been thinking about for a while. I organise the paragraphs according to the Chapter Shots. A bit of light editing then the writing is ready to publish! 

SCENE BUILDING — show us you in the middle of scene building through pictures, gifs, or a video. explain what is the best thing about scene building and what is the worst!

I dislike scene building because TS3′s weak ass makes everything so tedious. I have a Pinterest board to inspire the settings. The worst part is definitely when the game moves at 0.001 m/s and crashes, which happens far too often and pisses me off. Here’s a screenshot I accidentally took when setting up the big family dinner scene in Chapter 8. I tried my best to minimise the amount of sims that were actually there because I take shortcuts whenever possible. Crowd scenes suck. 

CC + POSE MAKING — do you make your own cc/poses for your scene? If so, what is your process like to create? do you just go off the top of your head? do you use reference photos?

I make all the poses that aren’t singular and ‘normal’, due to height differences and also so I can achieve my exact vision. Depending on the length of the chapter, this can range from 20-50 poses, which is looking to be around 700 poses by the story finale. I try to find reference photos (essential for ballet poses) when I can to make them look natural. I also convert or mesh clothing + objects, but I’m lazy so I often cheat with Photoshop. 

GETTING IN THE ZONE — what do you do to get in the zone to work on a scene? examples include: show us your playlist you use when working on a scene, what’s your go-to scene snack/drink, etc.

I don’t actually have anything for this. If I don’t feel like doing a particular task on the To Do List I just try something else. Sometimes I listen to Eva and Mako’s playlists when working though, and there are certain songs I associate with certain parts of the story which help me when I’m thinking of them. 

SCREENSHOT FOLDER — give us a look into your screenshot folder to show us just how much goes into one scene for your story. scrapped pictures encouraged!

I also have a linear method for pictures. Firstly, I create the poses, and test them in a blank background, which is when I figure out the most flattering angles, and edit the poses if needed. After that I begin series of test shots in the actual set, redoing up to three times until it looks passable. Since I use natural light almost every shot has a double (or even triple), with outdoor lighting for the environment and controlled interior lighting for the sims, which is then spliced together along with other atmospheric editing. There’s a lot of screenshots to ‘build’ the final visual but I rarely have alternative or scrapped finals because that would be a terrible waste of time. Why do I do this ridiculously tedious process? Because I’m stupid. 

CAPTIONS — are you a caption on the picture kind of storyteller or captions in text box type of storyteller? why? do you do both?

I don’t do caption format, because for me, it removes lots of detail and nuance. Long prose means my audience is much smaller, but I wouldn’t be able to convey half the things just by still visuals and dialogue. As you might be able to tell from the aforementioned question, picture taking is also just immensely tiring.

EDITING — explain and show us your process editing a scene through a video, gif, or picture. a before and after will suffice if you aren’t in the middle of editing a scene as you answer this.

Corresponding to the Screenshot Folder question:

I no longer rely on Reshade for post-processing, except for DOF, but even then I blur in editing. Lately I’ve been trying to create a more realistic, atmospheric look with strong DOF, bloom, motion blur, and smoothing out light + shadows with exposure brushes. 

THROWBACK — show us an ancient story scene you done in the past and explain how you would do the scene differently today!

You mean every scene I’ve ever done before En Pointe LOL If we’re talking ancient, I might as well go back to the very beginning of The Kingston Legacy, in 2015. It’s the classic legacy opening of the founder moving to a new town, with basic writing and terrible low-setting-no-cc pictures. I would do literally everything different. I can’t even begin to describe so here’s something to laugh at. 

I tag — @lazysunjade​ (watch her post it 1 second later) @amys-snapshots @notjustabooksims @simnights ❤ Please check the challenge post for the full and original format, and anyone else who wants to participate can also reblog it as an ask game! 

[jamaiskookie]

bangtan headcanon: OT7 IN HIGH SCHOOL 📓✂️

☞ genre; fluff, crack

☞ warnings; excessively stupid

masterlist  u wanna talk to highschool!bangtan?

《KIM SEOKJIN》

class clown

always manages to sneak kimbap in class, and stuffs his face despite being in the front row. 

he’s alarmingly good at sneaking food into places. 

cafeteria ladies love jin so much. 

and every christmas he brings in his perfected sugar cookies and never shares them.

(he’s in the cooking club)

((he’s the only one in the cooking club))

will interrupt the teacher to make a bad joke. 

“yes so helium is the fo- oh yes seokjin?“

“i was reading an excellent book about helium, i couldn’t put it down!! ahHAHAHHYUKHYUKAHHAHAHHA“ 

nobody’s?? really sure?? if he’s dating namjoon or not?? it’s the schools biggest mystery, there’s currently a betting pool going on worth about $500

likes to annoy namjoon and yoongi about holding bake sales. 

is surprisingly good at planning parties?? but never hosts them?? hoseok always gets him to plan his parties and he even planned prom!!

he’s particularly proud with the theme he came up with. 

‘zombie meets elegance‘ 

it was actually pretty nicely pulled off (much to the shock of the entire student body) 

《MIN YOONGI》

student council president 

takes his job very!! seriously!! 

fights with the principal on funding daily. 

doesn’t come to school without coffee and resting bitch face.

even the teachers are afraid of this short little emo boy. 

is the only one who actually wears the school uniform properly with the little tie and jacket because that’s how you show school spirit. 

definitely that closeted gay in high school who thinks nobody knows about his homosexuality when in fact, everyone knows.

(nobody has the guts to bring it up to him though)

“hyung why are you staring at jimin’s as-“

 “-NO WHY GET BACK TO WORK” 

actually enjoys doing morning announcements. 

“make sure to check out jin’s dumb bake sale i think he’s selling brownies for some charitable reason anYWAYS time for min’s advice column!!“ 

min’s advice column is yoongi’s free therapy. namjoon suggested adding an advice column to the school paper so now yoongi just judges his classmates’s decisions gives subpar advice. 

“i personally think you have no chance with this girl, but you’re clearly hell bent on asking her out. it’s a dumb choice. good luck.“ 

《JUNG HOSEOK》

fuckboy

throws obnoxious parties at his parent’s huge ass mansion. 

somehow?? is?? the nicest? playboy??? evER??

will respect your girl’s boundaries but also would 300% hit on her when you’re not looking. 

aftercare king wILL cuddle with you and help you clean up or whatever until jimin eventually comes in screaming. 

his school id says “hobi 💦👅” ... noone knows how he managed to do it (taehyung thinks he seduced the secretary) 

surprisingly good at romance even though he deTests dating

“it’s a waste of time, money, and ass.“  “- what?”

gives everyone dating advice whether they want it or nOt- he lives his *shhh very secret* romantic fantasies through his best friends. 

once helped taehyung ask out his girlfriend... they’re still going strong!!

defo has daddy issues that he never talks about,, maybe if a girl finds it sexc™️ in that kind of messed-up-bad-boy-she-could-fix vibe he’ll bring it up

kinda failing science lmao he probably needs a tutor.. but will never admit he needs a tutor for sake of his pride. 

most definitely has had sex in the janitor’s closet a couple times, up until yoongi caught him once, reported him to the school board and got him suspended... for a month. 

(yoongi has no regrets, that was the best month of his life.)

《KIM NAMJOON》

student vice president

honestly would probably be the council president and is the most qualified for it but can’t be bothered.

plus he hates public speaking and the president has to speak at assemblies.  

genuinely enjoys learning!! bUT HATES GROUP PROJECTS

because every single fucking time taehyung and jimin pester him about teaming up and he ends up doing like 75% of the work.

not because anyone forces him to or anything.

it’s because jimin and tae are such dumbasses every time they finish their work namjoon has a sudden uRGE TO REDO ALL OF IT BC THEY GOT IT WRONG.

tries to take all AP subjects.

gives up and drops half of them by the second semester.

great student but also will “no yoongi i don’t want to fucking play basketball i've been awake for thirty hours trying to finish this goddamn essay that’s due tomorrow. wHAT DO YOU MEAN WHY DIDN’T I DO IT EARLIER I WAS BUSY TAKING CARE OF MY BONSAI TREES.“

started the school paper!! it’s called “persona post”

writes about actual relevant things like political events and global problems, but everyone else just writes about school gossip *sigh*

although that one column examining hobi’s sex and dating life was a pretty fun piece of writing to read through. 

he sits in the back of the classroom and never raises his hand even though he knows the answer like 95% of the time.

definitely has a crush on seokjin

《PARK JIMIN》

the one everyone has a crush on

and when i say everyone i mean everyone, even hoseok has had a crisis over park jimin. 

(jungkook is definitely president of his fan club) ((in case it wasn’t clear, he’s dating jungkook))

school’s golden boy, basically gets away with everything with a bat of an eye... and the most infuriating thing is he doesn’t even realise it. 

“omg jimin!! you’re so cute!! this shirt looks sO good on you, can i touCH?” “omg thank you i didn’t think it fit well because it’s my boyfriends but that’s so sweet!!” “boy... hm?”

mom friend: sweetest bitch alive and is always worrying about his friends but everyone knows he’s secretly really fucking kinky.

(again, jungkook has no comment)

the kind of person who celebrates christmas in june. 

literally- he starts putting decorations in his locker and around the school mid june. by november, he’s wearing reindeer ears to school.

*lowkey kind of a nerd* genuinely enjoys studying with namjoon.

“well, studying with anybody else is just too stressful!! plus, namjoon’s so chill. he doesn’t look like it but he actually is super sweet and nice!!!“

“... please take those reindeer ears off, it’s embarrassing.“ 

half of the school would probably cut off an arm to sleep with him. seriously, he gets offers like everYDAY it’s kinda getting tiRING

is considering starting a youtube channel where he just takes videos of all the dogs and babies he meets throughout the day. 

“idk i think vlogging would be fun“

《KIM TAEHYUNG》

art hoe

nEVER FUCKING STUDIES OR PAYS ATTENTION BUT GETS DECENT GRADES.

the definition of bisexual mess, WILL trip when he sees hot people.

exclusively wears wired gold glasses and soft neutral sweaters to school. if it’s a good day he’ll wear a beanie. on special occasions he’ll maybe throw in some fUN loafers.

dyes his hair to match ~the vibes~ of that season. the most recent wild hair colour is cool toned teal. 

jungkook said he looks like leprechaun shit, but tae really likes it. 

tried to go vegan countless times, failed each and every one when he passed by a mc donalds. 

carries his sketchbook wherever he goes. he has that thing around 24/7, 100% would not be surprised if he slept with it under his pillow.

really quiet until he has a point to make;; like that time where he launched into a three hour screaming lecture on how phineas and ferb is an animated masterpiece.

drinks tea purely for the aesthetic of it. 

goes to hipster coffee shops to pretend to study... ends up watching barbie movies and critiquing them on the writing blog that he thinks nobody knows about. 

watches anime in class (he recently rewatched all of ATLA for the third time,, failed his econ class but worth it!!1!!1)

《JEON JUNGKOOK》

preppy jock

once again, everyone is attracted to him, but he’s so whipped for jimin everyone’s crush fades away once they talk to him because-

“oh it’s so cool that you have a dog!! you know, i think jimin kind of looks like a pomeranian sometimes it’s sO CUTE- hm? oh jimin’s my boyfriend.“

... it’s disgustingly adorable. 

plays almost every sport and is somehow always the team captain. not out of obligation or with leadership skills or anything, everyone else just votes for him. 

mess with his friends and he’ll put a stink bomb in your locker. 

his nickname is “golden baby” because he’s good at everything, teachers love him so much. 

grades? sTELLAR. sports? he’s done them ALL. creativity? pAINTED THE SCHOOL MURAL. service? volunteers at a pet shelter whenever he can (the bunnies love him for some reason) 

everyone either is 

a) in love w him, wants to fuck

b) jealous of him but is also secretly gay for him

pretends to not know how talented and cool he is and plays it off super cool

proceeds to fail, the only thing he’s bad at is humble bragging. 

“wow omg lol i got a 100 on my bio test and yesterday i got a hole in one in golf, my first time playing it but it’s chill i guess hahhah day in my life amirite.“

**this headcanon is the start of the bangtan school series, stay tuned**

wanna be tagged in school series or my writing? here or send me an ask

[avengers-rule103]

i can hear my nan watching the bold and the beautiful. i used to watch the show for a few years... but it has gotten out of fucking control with how ridiculous and how many times they redo the same plots they've done SO FUCKING OFTEN. like Steffy and Thomas are trying to break up Ridge and Brooke so Ridge can be with Taylor (their mother). and it's honestly LAUGHABLE that ANY of the characters judge any of the other characters for fucking anything because they've all done some fucked up shit to each other and they all keep doing it and every time they act like it's a shock. also with relationship drama there is such a massive theme of blonde against brunette. Brooke vs Taylor, Steffy vs Hope. i have to commend the actors though because even though the stories are beyond stupid it must be great money to just replay the same shit over years and years. why read the new scripts when you can read a script written and done 2 years ago that's exactly the same! ugh. can you tell i really hate this show now? 😅

[shade-romeo]

Hm. So I'm finally listening to Pebble Brain with lyrics so I can understand wtf is going on, thoughts as of first listen under cut hopefully

(All of this is /lh ofc, this is all meant to poke fun and say stupid things and just talk about the songs, I mean no ill will with any of this)

Oh Yeah? You Gonna Cry? - Very Nice Good Song Very Bop. As far as I'm aware this is like Wilbur going "haha loser ur girlfriend likes me more than you, stupid baby. Be nice maybe? Haha haha" and honestly good for him. I have nothing else to say i just like this one. 7/10

Model Buses - Story? Uh.. ????? Maybe???? Something about existential dread, being scared of the future? Very good bop but I don't understand the story and it is hindering my enjoyment. Yall are gonna hate me for this rating but 4/10 I jus... don't understand the lyrics? Perhaps after a few listens I will like it more but for now.. eh..

Concrete - immediately, very bop. Headbanger with the best of em. Story? Uh.. girl and guy are having an argument at the bar over a kiss, presumably one cheated with the other. So either they cheated on one another with Wilbur? Not likely but maybe. Or Wilbur is an outside perspective looking in on this argument and going into immense detail on how shitty this cheater is, based solely on an argument he saw at the bar once. Which isn't far fetched for Wilbur at all. 8/10

Perfume - first I go "oo yea good yea good base drums or whatever nice beat yea- OH SHIT THIS IS- THIS IS THE ONE- THE ONE ON TUMBLR- THE HE/THEY" oh yeah oh yeah oh YEAH OH YEAH OHHH YEAH this is good. This is perfect. This- the DELIVERY on the chorus, the absolute anguish you can hear in Wilbur's voice- the strain in his vocals and the desperation when he asks if it's rubbed off on him, OH My God, Wilbur I Love You. But yeah "He/They Stole My Girlfriend You Smell Like Her And I'm Going To Cry But Like You're Happy So Congrats Man" love that ♡♡♡♡♡ 10/10

You'll Understand When You're Older - Before even listening im assuming this is like "u told me I'd know things in adulthood well I don't, asshole" after listening i dunno if im right or wrong. okay so.. Guy Hates Work But It's Worth It to Come Home To His Wife/Girlfriend And They Have A Dark Secret? Is this.. the only thing I can think of for this is like.. a hidden ab*se thing? But otherwise I'm afraid I don't entirely understand this one. Still tho, a bop of course. 5/10

The Fall - GOD OKAY last night when the ep came out I tried to listen to it but I couldn't understand half the lyrics, except for this one which I got most of, I kinda already know this one and it's my favorite. OKAY SO THIS ONE- This I Love- I love the theme of like "It's Perfect On The Surface But If You Look Deeper Things Are Worse Than They Seem" i LOVE that. Because it applies to so many real word situations. When you first look at the wall of China you go "damn that's cool" but then you find out that there are like thousands of dead slaves built into the wall. It's just so good. And the CHANTING!!! and the MONOLOGUE!!! My only problem with this song is the drop off at the end, it just bothers me a little bit, it works very well with the song but its like a little pet peeve I suppose. Overall, 100000/10 I LOVE THIS SONG (this says nothing about my mental state shut up)

It's All Futile! It's All Pointless! - as far as I've heard apparently this is a redo of one of Wilbur's old songs which I've never listened to. So if I end up saying I'm not a huge fan of this song no one come throw hands. Ooh. Oooooh. So.. Wilbur's character leaves this person and has his own life, but is obviously still very hung up on them, and is obsessed with the thought of what they used to be. I think that's right? I mean damn. Honestly I just blindly like this one. There's no deeper meaning here at all It just bops honestly. 8/10 (and maybe use a sextant)

Sidenote- Lovejoy fucking loves musical interludes oh my god. There are so many. There's at least one in every one of the 7 songs. I'm not saying interludes are a bad thing, they work well every time, but after 7 songs all have a 10 second long interlude back to back, it gets a bit annoying.

[levis-hazelnut]

This is Venti 👇👇

I just wanna say,

FUCK VENTI FOR BEING SO PERFECTLY AESTHETIC!!

Like you remember how I was talking about Genshin Impact? Chongyun? Yeah so Venti is also apart of this game and I've been playing his quest for a while now. My dumbass falls in love with this stupid adorable dork and in my head I make this joke.

At first I was like Mmmmm Venti aesthetic as a joke.. then I did it just to see how it would look and now it's no longer a joke. I fucking hate it because it took me so long to get my blog to look this way and to change my aesthetic means I have to redo all 5 of my masterlists! And change my pfp and background

Do you understand how lazy I am???? Doing it once took a decade off my life I'm not gonna make it to fifty years old, Haze..

I'm not going to make it to fifty!!

Sorry I ranted in here I just needed to tell you about the last 20 minutes of internal and external struggles I've had.

Lmfaoooooo that's okay BUT I do think that if you change your theme it would look so pretty 👀 I do be lazy as well like I once almost gave up in changing my theme half way 💀

We do love the stupid adorable dorks tho 😩

[the-mercurial-star-o-vesper]

Fallout Themed “Get to Know me”

tagged by @emiratexaaron. Blast, I didn’t even realize I got tagged!

FIRST ENCOUNTER WITH FALLOUT:

Ye gods, I was maybe... We’re gonna go early teens. I remember watching Fallout 3 on my father’s computer, and having been someone who had played Oblivion to death, the graphics were amazing.

And then I got a hold of it, and didn’t immediately put God Mode on, and actually learned how to play a Bethseda game for once.

NAME OF FIRST CHARACTER To be honest, I don’t honestly remember. I was a kid who tended to blunder into games like nobody’s business. So I really can’t remember my first.

... I can remember that I tried to create the Fonz at one point in FO3. So High Charisma, wears the Tunnel Snakes Jacket, good Repair and Speech skill.

DUMB WAYS TO DIE, SO MANY DUMB WAYS TO DIE: I. Hate. Reaver Ghouls.

Falling off Bridges

How bout opening up a can of AcciDeathclaw in Fallout New Vegas?

Pissing off Legion at the wrong time.

NEW VEGAS. LEGENDARY. BLOATFLY.

Trying to make a run North of Goodsprings.

Trying to run away from North of Good Springs...

Geckos in Fallout 2.

Talking Pig Rats in Fallout 2.

Rats in Fallout 1.

Really, the list could go on.

WHAT WOULD I IMPROVE IN FALLOUT 4: *cracks knuckles*

Where do I start.

For one thing, Bring back the Dark Comedy that Fallout is known for. Fallout 4 is too damn bleak, made bleaker by its poorly executed message of “Never give up Hope”.

Cut out half them settlements. A few of them you can’t even build anything on (LOOKIN AT YOU COSTAL COTTAGE).

How about fix those Character plot-holes? Like what was Nick’s take on the Ghoul Removal from Diamond City. He’s been there for nearly 60 years.

Where are the Fallout ZAX?

Add Centaurs. Yes, from the Concept art. Fallout 4 wants Bleak? We’ll make it bloody horrific.

How about more lore-backing to the cap system, hm? Original Fallout, it had been the water traders and their show of force. Here is... cos they want to? You can dig a thing anywhere for clean water, so maybe the trade off could be food. Or maybe make it more mafia theme’d, like its Triggerman enforced or something.

Speaking of Which, can we have more revelance to the Triggermen? We have a Detective with all the Perks for the gods’ sake. Make something of ‘em. Fallout 4 is clearly Fallout Noir to New Vegas’s Fallout Western, let’s go all out.

I want to build a Synth.

How about the Minutemen? What they could’ve done is expanded it more than just from the Castle. Look, all other Factions have bases and set missions from bases that apply to their respective storylines. The Minutemen’s stops at getting a base. Why is that? Why not bring in that Minutemen-Gunner war? How about having the end of the Minutemen Quest be “Taking Quincy Back!”.

Speaking of which, let’s redo that Minutemen Intro a bit. How about... Billy the Ghoul’s Family! Yes, I mean the Ghoul kid. Remove that stupid Fridge quest, and add them to the original roster of Settlers that Preston Garvey is protecting. It’d introduce your character to Ghouls right off the bat without issue (Since there wasn’t a bloody introduction to ghouls).

How about where the Hell the rest of the Minutemen groups were when Qunicy was attacked. The only two you run into were recently Gunners, or turned Raider years ago.

WHAT ABOUT THOSE TIMED MISSIONS BETHSEDA.

How about a bit more interaction with the world from the Companion’s side? If you take a look at Outer Worlds, made by the creators of the original Fallout, the Companions do have an impact when they’re around and it affects and changes the world around them. When you have a Companion in Fallout 4, they’re more like Ghosts with tiny but ultimately meaningless interactions here and there. - I want to be able to call out Piper on her Yellow Journalism, and actually see an increase in News papers around the Commonwealth if I help her. Plus, not just earn her perk, but also gain the ability to create News Paperstands / Printing Presses in Settlements in order to help build the infrastructure of News. You can even add missions about gathering Paper or Printing Parts. - I want to be able to have trading interactions with Goodneighbor, thus giving a reason to have Hancock as a successful companion outside of him being a real cool ghoul. - If you let Danse survive, how about not just letting him grow out of his bigotted views, but let him train Minutemen in weapons, in armor, and in tactics and having a command. - If you help Curie, imagine the improvement of Health for your settlements. Imagine who she could teach for Doctors and Medics, and actually give the Commonwealth a Healthcare system again. - PRESTON IS YOUR BATMAN (I mean the military term, but its funnier if you don’t know the alternative meaning). - Y’know, I would’ve liked to have seen Duncan.

For Companions: -

And the Fucking Institute. An attempt to be the Big MT, and failing that. They could’ve done wacky mad science and still been 50s B-Movie levels of seriousness, y’know? We got so many hints on what they’re like, and they failed to live up to it! We have the visual evidence and dialogue that Gen1 and Gen2 tend to literally dissect / pull things apart by their bare hands. We could’ve seen more of that. What do they do to all those people they kidnap? ... Where did they get the Super Mutants from. How about the Synth v1 Gen3s? Y’know, the one’s that Look like Gen 3s, but have machine parts inside. There could’ve been more mad science, more B-Movie levels of sholy hit. Grossly mutated animals, brains in jars, unique robots, the works!

How about we have something akin to the Master directing the Super Mutants. This was a problem / thing I had with FO3 too. The original Super Mutants had a Psychic Master entity, so why not the East Coast mutants?

How about an explanation as to why the Assaultron is only in Boston.

Where the hell is the Rest of Boston.

How about being capable of directing Minutemen groups to weed out or scavange an area? I don’t have time for all this Missions Present, we have a Castle Now, SEND SOMEONE ELSE.

How about instead of going after Kellogg, Kellogg comes after you. The Director is dying, and you’re the Backup. This would associate you with the Institute just as early as the Minutemen, Maybe. And then, you can take the game into whatever direction you want. - Explore the Glowing Sea by yourself, we’re busy.

Mix Pickman’s Gallery and Cabot House... As one mini-storyline.

Add more cases for Valentine, such as Diamond City Blues and Mystery Meat... Possibly even Cabot House.

Where on Earth is the Brotherhood getting all those Vertibirds... Do they have a factory? Those things blow up if you look at them wrong--- WHERE ARE THEY GETTING THEM.

Replace most of the Generic Raiders with named Raiders, not unlike Fallout 1. Have more Gunners, Rust Devils, the Nuka World Parties; more development at Libertalia.

How about more branching options to deal with Kellogg.

Add a bit of a reputation system for Cities you can’t make a settlement from. Boosting faction or trade routes or really, anything other than sitting there.

... So to sum it up.

I’d do practically a rewrite of Fallout 4.

... ye Gods.

Not tagging anyone cos, well, I don’t know that many people who play fallout that weren’t already tagged...