#a teen girl once tried to defend me that there was no reason to defend Apollo because he was the same in the myths

[nysus-temple]

We need to talk about the downgrade of Apollo in Lore Olympus because Rachel did him so dirty, like his character has been mistreated do much 😭

Don't take this personal, anon, you've done nothing wrong ! i'll just use this ask as a way to, somehow, dumps my violent thoughts about this... Thingy.

Rant below.

What Lore Olympus did to Apollo isn't even a downgrade, it's plain disrespectful, an insult to an important figure and symbol. Not only him, but also the rest of the gods that appear in that nonsense that dares to call itself a """comic""", which is also an insult to writers and artists. Lore Olympus did a culture wrong, did a comic wrong in general, but it did to Apollo has no words to describe it. If every time someone talks about Apollo, they need to EXPLAIN why he's not the LO one, we have a problem. When we are talking about Apollo, we're talking about APOLLO and that's it. Why the fuck do we need to specify? Because of this piece of shit that had the audacity to even come out in physical format. As someone who has been writing since she was a child, who also studies literature and took courses regarding how to write a fucking decent story, i don't even know where to begin with this horrible piece of... """Media""" that Webtoon keeps promoting as if it wasn't something that wasn't of a big deal. My ass.

Gotta love seeing a bunch of teens who educated themselves with Tiktok reading that AND not only throwing bullshit at Apollo, a figure who i love with my entire being and who has brought me comfort in numerous ways, but also thinking that rape victims just "get over it" after meeting a handsome man or whatever. As if Hades wasn't fucking awful in that comic. That's not how it works. Don't write about dangerous topics if you know shit about them.

Gotta love how i always associated Persephone with dark-pink, due to the pomegranate seeds being of that color, BUT NOW i can't see her with anything with that color anymore because of the ugly ass """character""" LO made. What even is WRONG with the teens reading it that they go and change wiki articles to make the myths accurate to this bullshit that has the balls to call itself a comic ????

I won't even go "sure, you like it, fine" NO. NO I CANNOT. WHAT DO YOU EVEN SEE THAT IS APPEALING? I've seen people who knew nothing about Greek Folklore say it was boring as hell. Some kind of Twilight 2.0 but even worse. For fuck's sake, i'm the first person who likes characters that in real life wouldn't be nice to be with, because NONE OF THEM ARE HUMAN, all of those are monsters or invented creatures. What do those teens even SEE in LO when the designs are all fucking awful.

And after what they did to ALL of the gods, SPECIALLY to Apollo, if they have the fucking audacity to touch Dionysus too, i truly apologize for the person i will become.

If they fucking dare to mistreat Dionysus just like the damn Hades Game did and make him a pice of scum just like that one, i do apologize for the things i'm capable of doing.

[nostalgicmiscellaneous]

I was reflecting on Violet's talk about Colin's sensitive nature and made me think that truly he's a bit of a loner in their home, isn't him? It's like he is the one that needs to keep on trying and when he does something for himself, he's questioned, belittled or ignored. When Colin was thinking that he should marry and forge his own way, to be taken serious, he told Violet exactly that, Anthony shut him down by simply saying he should have taken him to brothels... and there you go, folks, where Colin's example of how a single man should behave comes from. He thought courting a girl everyone wanted was him being taken serious but the brother he admires, told him that, and made he believe that's what a man of their position should behave at his age. So Maybe if he does, if he acts like them, he's going to find his own path & find his own happiness, he thinks. When Colin travels, he keeps writing home, wanting to communicate with his family and loved to hear back from them, and also because he really loves to write - and is good at it -, but they rarely if ever ( some) do. And that's why he was always happy that Pen did, as he was mostly ignored and even mocked for that, they were being quite dismissive of him. We know how he also doesn't truly feel like he belongs and that's one of the reasons he went away, run away. Sure, he loves to travel but we know it's also to free himself of the whole 'Colin Bridgerton' he thinks he should be. When Colin tries to make something, do business of his own, but is something out of his depth as he was never prepared for it - Anthony was the heir to the title and older, likely was taught by his father some things already and maybe Colin and Benedict would too but had no time and Anthony never guided him that way, it seems - he was screamed at and, once again, thought he had truly no purpose. Losing his father way younger than Anthony was a huge trauma too. As much as Violet is a good mother, in that context, losing his father put him without a fundamental support and counsel a young men would need at that time, specially on his late teens and young men years. Still, he's very sweet, a soft guy who worries about his family, just look at every situation that he truly is there wanting to support, a romantic and quite naive in the matters of emotions. A kind guy who always wants to make others happy and defend people when he thinks they are being taken advantage of, were wronged or need his help just to feel happy. And yet the only person that actually has always ever done that for him, in every aspects - attention, protection, love, interest and engaging on his life -, is Pen, his kindred spirit.

[poppadom0912]

Hi, Would you make a Halstead!sister where she is a teen and have her very first boyfriend and when she decides to break up with him he hits her. She wants to hide it from her brothers but they found out anyway

Warnings: Abuse and violence, swearing, canon-typical injuries.

A/N: Okay, this fic will be the last one for a while and I mean it this time. Writing this was so random but I got sudden inspo when I found this half written soooo please do enjoy!!

You swear that this wasn't supposed to get as bad as it did.

You were still in high school and it might've been your first boyfriend and it definitely took too many tries to convince your brothers to give you permission to date but somehow, you got it in the end.

Several times, both Jay and Will but mainly Jay, warned you of abusive, manipulative and toxic partners which you knew existed but never thought you would date someone as such.

Joey was nice at first. After inviting him over for dinner a few times, your brothers began to be more lenient towards him though they would never admit it aloud.

Yes, they were still quite wary considering you were both still young and in school but over the course of a few months, you were finally allowed to go on a date alone without them acting as chaperones.

Then, it came to your break up.

During school, you and your best friend found Joey and another girl in your year locking lips against her locker without any shame at all. It was there and then you decided that evening you were going to break it off with him.

The two of you met up in the school car park where he would usually drive you home but unbeknownst to him, you had different plans for that today.

You hated how he was acting so nonchalant, the biggest smile on his face when he noticed you walking up to his car. You felt sick, desperately wanting to smack that smirk off his face.

"Y/N! Baby, I missed you at lunch. Where-" Joey started, opening his arms to embrace you but was cut off.

"Don't call me baby." You said sharply, your tone showing you were being completely serious. "We're done Joey."

Joey blinked, tilting his head to the side in confusion before laughing. "Oh Y/N, you're hilarious! Come on, we're going to my house-"

Once again, you cut him off, harshly shoving his hand off your elbow. "No, I'm being serious Joey. We're breaking up."

His face immediately fell at your words. All of a sudden, with the flip of a switch, he changed completely. It was so fast that it started scaring you.

Before allowing him to get a word in, you turned around so you could walk away and go home on your own but you were held back. A hand was suddenly tightly gripping your wrist, pulling you back towards Joey.

"What the hell!?" You exclaimed, trying to rip your hand out of his but he wouldn't budge.

"Joey, you're hurting me. Let go." You said, trying to reason with him but nothing was working.

You tried to calm him down, Jay's voice in the back of your mind explaining step by step what to do in cases like this but you found yourself frozen, unable to defend yourself alike to how you were taught.

It was all so sudden. One moment you were angrily staring up at Joey and the next you were looking to your left, your right cheek burning as it tingled with numbness.

Both of you were shocked at his actions. Using his shock to your advantage, you pulled your wrist out of his hand, ignoring the burning sensation you felt and ran.

*****

Unfortunately for you, it was a friday night and that meant both your older brothers were at home. Typically, on the weekends, you swapped and went to Will's before going back to Jay's for the weekdays. So that meant Will was at Jay's apartment to pick you up.

You were still breathing heavily as you entered the house, unintentionally slamming the front door shut as you came to your senses.

You were home. You were safe.

"Y/N, are you okay?" Jay shouted from the living room. He heard the door slam and was confused since he knew he specifically told you to never slam doors.

"Uh- yeah." You hesitated, licking your lips as you answered. "I'm, I'm good."

"You're red and sweaty- did you run all the way here?" Jay asked after a moment of studying you, taking note of your red cheeks and sweat collecting forehead.

"Yeah I did, I'm bursting for the toilet." You quickly thought of an excuse, lying about why you ran home.

Before he could reply, you dashed past him towards the bathroom to keep up with said lie.

"Hey Y/N-Oh..." Will words were lost as he watched you disappear as quick as he saw you.

"What's up with her?" Will asked, looking confusingly at Jay and down the hall where you disappeared.

"I'm not sure."

****

Joey went back to disturbing you as soon as monday came. The weekend seemingly getting on his nerves because he was buzzing monday morning to the point that you turned back around whenever you saw him.

But you could only run so far from him because at the end of the day as you waited for your best friend, he was grabbing you way too hard.

This process only repeated itself for the next two weeks, becoming almost routine where you only missed him for two days overall.

Three weeks since he first laid hands on you, you were now covered in an amalgamation of redness, bruises and finger-shaped marks.

Today though, today something changed.

It was friday, nearly a month since you broke up with Joey and you were walking to Med. Will was supposed to pick you up but his latest patient was causing problems and asked for you to walk to the hospital only ten minutes away.

So you and one of your friends who lived near that area walked together, departing as you reached the ED doors and she walked home.

As you waved her off, your smile bright and hurting still from how much both of you were laughing, you weren't paying too much attention to your surroundings. You didn't think there would be much danger outside a guarded ED but alas.

One second your waving your friend off and the next, your on your hands and knees on the floor. It happened so fast you couldn't comprehend what even occurred.

"What the-"

Someone harshly pulling you up stopped your trail of thought, their grip so tight that you couldn't focus on the burning in your palms and knees.

"Joey! Let me go you dickhead!" You shouted at the boy as soon as you looked up at the perpetrator.

Pulling your wrists from grasp, you grunted when his grip didn't let up, instead it did the opposite and tightened to the point that your hand was starting to go pale.

"Please Joey- Please just let me go and we can talk this out, I promise." You pleaded with him, eyes going glassy when he started pulling you away from the hospital entrance, panic finally setting in.

You tried pulling yourself away, heels digging into the ground to stop him but he was too strong, his height and build giving him an advantage along with being on the football team while you barely even participated in gym.

"Joey your hurting me-" You were cut off when he shoved you up against the wall head first and then repeatedly shoved your head back when you kept talking.

"Shut up bitch!" He almost screeched, hand on your forehead to prevent your head from moving, ensuring your eyes remained on him.

Your vision blurred, head banging with what felt like the worst headache in the universe. Your reply was simply a whine, no words possible due to the pain he inflicted.

His elbow was digging into your torso, your lungs and ribs restricted from any movement because of the pressure.

"J-Jo..." Everything of his increased, his grip, his shouts, the pain he caused.

Your breathing was taken away from you when he suddenly brought his fist to your torso repeatedly.

All of a sudden, he disappeared and you were falling, your legs unable to support you.

Before you could meet the ground, you were caught and being hauled into an embrace you hadn't felt in a decade. The familiar cologne one you bought with your own pocket money and a voice you'd known since birth.

"I've got you Y/N." Will whispered to you, cradling you gently in his arms.

"Ethan, you got him?" Will called out to his colleague but you were so out of it you couldn't see the other doctor.

"I'll handle him, get her inside." Ethan replied as he restrained Joey, his past military training helping him plenty.

The last thing you remembered was Will's reassuring words before everything went black.

*****

"We have to wait for her to wake up to determine how bad the concussion is but besides that, she's okay." Will finished explaining to Jay the prognosis who arrived five minutes ago.

"She's also got old bruises." Jay finally looked up from your face to Will's, anguish clear on the latter's face. "This has been going on for a while now."

Jay was speechless.

He was at a crime scene when Will called him, something neither brother did when they knew the other was at work and despite trying to anticipate what was going to happen, he could never guess it would be this.

Will explained that he and Ethan were taking a quick breather outside together after the death of their last patient when they heard a man shouting and though they couldn't see you, Will easily recognised Joey.

While Ethan subdued Joey, Will wasted no time in getting you to safety and inside the ED where Connor treated you.

There would be no long lasting effects from any of the injuries but they were bound to stick around for a while and they would definitely hurt.

Will couldn't get it out of his memory - seeing your ex boyfriend continuously punching you with no remorse and almost strangling you with the death grip he had. Will saw it every time he blinked and felt like puking.

Jay had walked passed Joey when he entered the ED and to say he felt like throttling the boy was putting it very, very lightly.

But Jay had plans for little Joey, he was more than confident that Voight would let him have a few words with him later. Especially if it involved you - his boss seemed to have a weak spot whenever you were involved, everyone did.

"I need to find Goodwin and get off shift early, I'll be back." Will said. Maggie could only do so much for so long.

Jay hummed. "I've got her, she's not going anywhere don't worry."

Will hadn't been gone for long when you started coming back to. Jay was messaging Hailey, asking for updates on what they were doing with Joey when he felt your fingers twitch in his other available hand.

Jay waited patiently, forcing himself to let you take your time and not rush you just in case. Will mentioned a concussion that they weren't too sure on the extent on its damage.

Your whimpers had his heart in your control, a lump in his throat at you clearly in pain and his inability to cure and rid of all your ills.

Seeing your eyes, the colour so bright under the hospital lights and because of the fear you felt so vividly, Jay found himself unable to breath for a moment.

"Is he gone?" You whispered, voice hoarse as you squinted up at your older brother.

"Yes he is." Jay nodded, ignoring the burning that randomly enveloped his eyes and brushed your hair back with such a feather light touch that you didn't register the gesture. "He's never going to touch or bother you ever again, I promise."

The only response you could formulate was tears, the waterworks instant as soon as the words came out of Jay's mouth.

"Will and I will make sure nothing happens ever again, we promise."

[woso-dreamzzz]

Nagging

Barcelona Femení x Teen!Reader

Summary: You move from Lyon to Barcelona

You were pretty young when Lucy was at Lyon - rising through the youth academy at such a steady pace that she was a little upset that she left before you could make your debut.

You were talented, she knew that, but playing alongside you was something that she had been looking forward to.

It was a shame that she left for City the year that you debuted, shooting to the top of the best goalscorers of the season.

But it was all fine now, as you slipped out of her car in Barcelona and tugged your hood up.

"Oh, come on," She said jovially, an arm over your shoulder," Are you really teenage angsting this early in the morning?"

You gave her a look that was clearly modelled off of Alexia's. "Maybe if you didn't have Narla jumping on my bed to wake me up, I'd be happier with you!"

She laughed, keeping you by her side no matter how you tried to wiggle away. "I bought you breakfast!"

"You bought you breakfast," You reminded her," You let me take the pastries you don't like."

"I feed you, walk you-"

"I'm not Narla!"

"-Make sure you're healthy and this is the thanks I get? God, raising a teenager is hard work."

You rolled your eyes. "You're hardly raising me."

"Shhh." Lucy shoved your hood further onto your head, tugging it down to cover your eyes. "Don't break my heart."

You rolled your eyes and knocked your bag against hers as you slipped into the locker room. Thankfully, you had a respite from her, sandwiched between Patri and Pina's lockers.

You got dressed with mechanical efficiency, pulling on your shorts and training top and then your socks. As you sat to lace your boots, your mind wandered.

You had a few questions left on your Physics worksheet from last night that you needed to work on but that was it. If you could jot down some answers within an hour of getting home, you'd probably be allowed to head to the corner store and stock up on snacks.

You hummed to yourself, nodding before getting up.

Lucy threw her arm around you again as Aitana joined the pair of you. Aitana was usually stuck to Keira's side but with Keira doing media, she joined you and Lucy.

She looked over you critically as you sat down on the pitch, refusing to get up until everybody else appeared. "Your shoes aren't done up properly."

You look down at them, shrugging. "Huh, I guess so. I'll do them up later."

"Do it now," She urged," You'll forget later. Do them now."

You rolled your eyes. "No, I won't."

"Yes, you will. Just like last week when you forgot to zip up your jacket and I had to do it even though it was nearly freezing."

"My fingers were numb! That's not my fault!"

Aitana crossed her arms over her chest. "Do your laces."

You did as you were told but made sure to grumble so she knew you were doing it begrudgingly.

Lucy remained standing over you too, eyeing your boots up strangely. "I thought I told you to get new boots. These ones are practically falling apart."

You tried to defend yourself. "I've been busy!"

"Doing what? Playing video games all day?"

"No! Some-Sometimes I sleep..."

Lucy rolled her eyes. "We'll go boot shopping tonight."

"Do we have to?"

"Yes."

"You're no fun." You stood from the ground with your newly laced shoes and wandered away, not wanting to get nagged anymore. That was probably the reason you avoided Alexia and many of the other older members of the squad.

Although that idea didn't really go to plan when Frido sidled up to you.

You thought, for a moment, that she was going to lecture you but she just gave you one of her silly grins and passed you a packet of sweets.

You opened it quickly, pouring everything into your mouth all at once and disposing of the evidence as soon as you could. With the nagging mood all the older girls were in today, you didn't want to take any chances of them seeing you break your diet.

Frido winked at you and you grinned at her, keeping your little secret.

Though, not for long because Aitana noticed and snitched on you, leaving you standing in front of the older girls as they lectured you about healthy eating and fuelling your body properly.

●～●～●～●～

You squirmed in Lucy's grip as she smeared sun cream all over your face. Or, well, she poured more sun cream than necessary into her hand and slapped all over your cheeks.

"Lucy!" You groaned as you tried to get away," Stop it! That's too much!"

"Too much?" She echoed with a laugh," I don't think it's enough at all."

She reached for the bottle and you shrieked, kicking it clear across the room. "I haven't even absorbed most of it!"

She winked at you. "Just make sure you don't get skin cancer."

You groaned and contemplated slamming your head against the brick walls - although with the amount of sun cream still on your skin it was more likely you would leave an imprint of your face.

"I won't get skin cancer," You insisted, a hair's breadth away from stamping your foot," And I don't need more sunscreen."

"Lucy," Keira, also being no help, laughed," Stop being annoying."

Lucy, still being annoying, gasped dramatically," Me? Annoying? Excuse me, I'm just trying to make sure the kid stays healthy. Renard will have my head if I return her with a single hair out of place."

"Hair that I'm going to tear out in frustration if you keep trying to drown me in sun cream."

Lucy rolled her eyes, swiping some of the excess off your face to rub into her own skin. "Alright, grumpy. Have it your way but if you end up all red and peeling, I expect you to take full responsibility."

"I'm not going to burn," You said dismissively, pulling up your socks.

"Uh-huh," Lucy said clearly not believing you," Sure, kiddo."

"I'm not!"

She gave you a look.

"I'm not."

She just continued to stare, face splitting into the widest, smuggest smirk you had ever seen when you let her rub more sun cream into your face, just to be safe.

[wheredidhiseyebrowsgo]

Do you know any bestfriend peter and stiles fixes no steter just really good best friends I just feel like there so underrated <3

Yeah!

Accident by Chattalgi

(1/1 I 964 I Not Rated I Sterek)

Stiles hurts himself.

Derek is there to help.

I’ll Go Through a Million Tragedies Just to Be with You by Ghosted_Redacted

(1/? I 993 I Not Rated I Stackson)

Stiles is suffering after the nogitsune, but that doesn’t mean he has to suffer alone. Sure, no one in town other than an (ex) homicidal werewolf, but that’s…fine.

But then he gets a call from London.

And maybe people do care.

(In other words: everyone suffers. But everyone also finds someone to love)

Two of Swords by pixieblade

(1/1 I 7,484 I Teen I Sterek)

Denial, blocking off emotions, avoidance of and not seeing the truth, stalemate, impasse.

---

They gather to stare at the orb. It's cold, where it should be warm. There's death, where life should flourish. One reaches out a hand, takes the freezing orb and presses it deep against his chest, sharing warmth and life and love.

'Breathe, little spark,' he whispers softly. Finding gentleness when it was once so lost to him. 'Breathe,' he coaxes. 'We're here. You're not alone anymore. Never again.'

The orb shudders in his embrace. Tears, like a melodic tinkling, dance across it's surface as it gives in and sinks into the heat of the other.

Never again, it repeats, and prays the other is right.

Wild (Blue Neighborhood) by BeautyOnFyre

(1/1 I 11,029 I Teen I Sterek)

Peter's lethargic body was unresponsive as he sat in the wheelchair, endlessly staring out the window of his hospital room. His side twinged a bit from the rough scrubbing the nurse had given his mottled flesh earlier and he ached to move even a finger.

"Uncle Peter?" The small voice was behind him in the doorway. He remembered that voice. Contrary to the title bestowed from the small girl that rounded his chair into his line of sight, Stiles Stilinski was not related to Peter at all.

Or how Stiles and Peter became best friends for life and brought Stiles into the Pack.

A Wolf's Ribbon by Dexterous_Sinistrous

(6/6 I 36,091 I Explicit I Sterek)

Derek had been coached on how to approach the child heir apparent while hundreds of eyes watched him. He kept his eyes focused on the cradle, leaning over the edge as best he could to see the baby everyone had been talking about.

Stiles smiled when he saw Derek, kicking his legs out as he reached a hand up for him. He cooed at Derek, his fingers grabbing at the older boy in an attempt to touch him, all to no avail. He gurgled out a laugh when Derek reached a hand down into the cradle, snatching hold of his fingers as best he could.

Derek offered a small smile in response, allowing Stiles to playfully tug on his hand.

The two children made an adorable sight before the Court and their parents. That was the moment Queen Talia and King John decided to arrange their marriage. Every second was planned out without the voiced concern of the children.

It takes a village by pixieblade

(32/? I 78,312 I Mature I Sterek)

Stiles is tired. He's tired of always having to defend himself to his so-called best friend. He's tired of being ignored and he's tired of the Pack never having his back.

So this is his line. He'd draw it in the sand, but all he has is a glitter sharpie.

It'll have to do.

Baseball Bats and Sour Wolves by Erin1324

(68/? I 84,425 I Teen I Sterek)

Derek is cursed with some sort of spell, and for some reason only responds to Stiles as a result. He tries to attack everyone else, even his Alpha, he's also acting super overprotective of Stiles, hardly letting anyone get close to him.

Joining the Fang Gang by AClosedFicIsNeverRead

(21/? I 87,645 I Explicit I Sterek)

“Lydia? Lydia, look at me,” Derek urged, a slight tremor in his voice as he fought to be gentle with her despite his alarm. She blinked through tears and struggled to meet his gaze as he crouched in front of her. “What did you see?”

“Forest… It’s dark… His Dad is screaming for him…” Her lips trembled as she shook her head and gasped, “Oh, God… He’s dying, Derek. I can feel it… It hurts so much… Oh, poor Stiles…”

- OR -

The one where Stiles is turned into a vampire, hides it from the pack, and tries to manage his new 'condition' without them noticing.

[restinslices]

I think I asked this before I’m not sure. I’m pretty senile 😭 but I was wondering if we can get a pt.2 of the Lin Kuei trio with the delinquent kid? Like they have a twin sister who’s the exact opposite and is pretty much a goody two shoes suck up but she tries to defend their sibling and get them out of trouble and is just so loving but this makes them (the delinquent) mad because they don’t need her help and one day they snap and just hit her. Like I just KNOW Bi Han putting belt to bare ass bout his babygirl 😭🙏🏾 like the girl is just following her brother or sister around trying to start a conversation and *BAM* she gets hit in the face and yelled at for being annoying

Omg anon I remember you. You definitely asked for a part 2 but the wording on who hit who confused me a lil. I don't think you saw when I asked for clarification but we've found ourselves here again :D I wrote Bi-Han’s part then became brain empty for the other 2😭. It’s been 6 days since I last posted so imma just post this one, but if you still want the other 2, hit my line again

Bi-Han's patience is already low

You know this. I know this. The neighbors know this. A random bitch in a different country knows this-

I fully believe he's a black mom on the inside. No I will not be explaining

The twin sister would be a relief to deal with since they're not constantly arguing with him

I can see him getting annoying with them defending their delinquent sibling because he sees it as not letting them take accountability

Still though, one of them gets the bigger picture frame when shit is hung and I think we both know who it is

I think when the situation happens, he needs a second to process what he saw

He's not like "omg violence. I can't believe that happened!". He's like "now this kid is a lot of things... Stupid is not one of them. Let me rub my eyes. That had to be a hallucination"

Once he realizes that what he saw was real, that black mom is really coming out-

Idk how someone can say "you done lost your raggedy ass mind!" in a sophisticated manner, but he does it

Did he permanently scar his brother? Well yes! But he thinks that was valid. What he just saw was unnecessary

There's a lot of yelling and for some reason my brain thinks Bi-Han would have the twin sister hit them back. He's gotta make it fair

Oh but that's not the only punishment. The delinquent is already super disrespectful and now they're physically lashing out

Welcome to Bi-Han's Bootcamp For Troubled Teens

More training, more physical labor, more chores, more everything

This kid is finna be working like them kids in Holes until this rebellious phase is over

The disrespect, not taking anything serious, then not being able to control their own emotions? It would annoy tf out of him

As for our punch victim, he’s like “see? This is why you have to stop defending them and let them take accountability for their actions”

I don’t see him lessening their work load so to speak, but they definitely aren’t working to the bone like their twin is

“I have let myself be run over for too long. There will order in this fucking house”

[findafight]

Jonathan’s line about Steve in vol 2 was so…. I don’t know. I mean yeah it straight up confirms that Nancy and Jonathan make fun of Steve behind his back, and like I get that I have never been in Nancy’s situation so obviously it seems more mortifying to me, but I would have felt so guilty in her place. I can’t imagine not shutting Jonathan up if he started shit talking about Steve. Like Steve would have been straight up unmentionable if I was Nancy. Idk.

I get that Duffers don’t treat their characters emotional lives seriously, but like. That’s why Robin being kind to Nancy in s5 despite Nancy’s uh.. well frankly appalling attitude towards Robin, makes zero sense to me. I really wanted Nancy to struggle being in Steve’s group. Not in the “she deserves it bhahaha” way, but like… Steve dumped his friends for her (which was good for him), and her expecting to get the same treatment and meeting Robin instead? Who actively dislikes her and for a good reason? Who is smart and cool and kind? That’s way more interesting than people kissing Nancy’s ass the whole season, while she is actively putting Max’s life in danger. Like, yeah in high school she is the chief editor of the newspaper, and at home she is the eldest sister, and with Jon she makes fun of Steve, and now none of these people are here, but Steve is here and so is his bestie. And Steve is as kind as always, but Robin dislikes her, and it is not just prejudice

Nancy Wheeler you wild girl! She has no guilt lmao She's like yeah steve was dumb and annoying and didn't enable my investigation, and jon goes yep, what an idiot. All while Steve is just like. bumpin around making friends with little nerds haha. Minding his own business blaming himself for the end of their relationship. You're right, it's kinda bonkers because even if we take the stance that Nancy didn't cheat (which I believe she did) like. she still had him as her second choice and as soon as he pushed back a bit and didn't give her the kind of support she wasn't telling him she needed (until talking about exposing the lab in the library where anyone could hear) she jumped ship and ran to Jonathan. Why would she want to talk about Steve? Why wouldn't she want to try to forget he ever existed as anything other than Mike's friend Dustin's older friend? Is that not weird for her?

(i think you might mean s4? but i can work with s5 too haha) It's so much more compelling to me to have Nancy and Robin at odds with each other because Robin is like a little guard chihuahua holding a grudge for Steve. She holds grudges so well let her do it more!! like jesus give him someone in his corner! And also for herself! She got so nervous and tried to explain and defend herself, and Nancy only really started to listen once they got into the hospital. Nancy has a not great plan that puts one of the kids in danger, one of the kids Steve is close to. (Max wrote him a letter!!) I think Robin would really see Steve's people as her people, even if she wasn't personally close to them she'd still feel comfortable around the younger teens because Steve is? Let robin be critical of this plan. Let her call it out or something. Give Nancy someone to push against, it's no fun if there's no resistance! I want Nancy to be the one wanting friendship with Robin, and Robin not being receptive to it. Nancy not having a relationship handed to her would be refreshing and I want to see how she'd try to win Robin's friendship.

Let Robin not want to work with Nancy because she's heard the rumours about how her and Steve ended, even though he only mentioned that he wasn't a good boyfriend ans wasn't what she needed so it didn't work out. Robin saw that one week Steve and Nancy had a fight, and a day later she was ditching with Jonathan? yeah something is fishy there to even the most socially oblivious person. Let Robin know Steve well enough that she knew he at least thought he was telling the truth but that there must have been more. Let Robin decide she was going to do the most cliche best friend thing and not be very nice to the ex that broke her bestie's heart.

ooooh anon what you're saying is so interesting because, yeah. Steve dumped Tommy and Carol for Nancy, and that was good for him, and then Nancy got with Jonathan who doesn't really have any friends in Hawkins. So she's always been her boyfriend's main person of similar age they're close to. But now Steve's got Robin. Who is funny and kind and weird and loyal and smart and sarcastic. Who is obsessed with Steve and who Steve is also obsessed with. And that, from a s5 stancy pov, is so interesting because now Nancy is now competing (in her mind) for her boyfriend/potential bf's attention with his best friend. Like Jonathan was focused on his family, obviously (and this caused strain for them too) but it's not the same socially as a best friend taking priority. Steve would still hold those relationships, because they're good for him and good for the others, and there's zero reason for him to abandon them this time.

I think Nancy would hate it. Like Steve would obviously give her tonnes of attention, but with him having actual close friendships not just with Robin but Dustin and Max (at least) too, she'd still feel like she was bartering for time with him. That is suuuuch a fun potential dynamic between nancy and steve and also nancy and steve's friends.

[fairyqueentitana]

Let's talk about Alya

The time has come to talk about a fan favourite outside the dynamic duo of Marinette and Adrien. Today's chosen character is Alya Cesaire going to be a bit more to the point than usual.

This girl has no self-preservation - I don't care what anyone says Alya is around 15/16 and is running into a battlefield to record for her blog. She is a child risking her life for some videos have any of the adults addressed this NOPE. Someone buy this girl a drone, please.

Telling Nino everything even when she shouldn't- I'm being honest I'm quite surprised she never told Nino ladybug's identity. She tells him everything down to the fact she was Rena Rougue and when she gets back her miraculous she also tells him. IT'S A SECRET FOR A REASON. Honestly, we all had that phase in our first serious relationship we tell the person too much. However, somethings should stay between you and your friend not you your friend and your boyfriend.

The Lila situation - If my best friend tells me someone is lying I will believe them and support them. Alya literally brushes off Marinette as jealous. What annoys me is the only time she defends Marinette she still in the end goes back to supporting Lila. Then she posts the interview on her blog without questioning anything. A good friend will call you out on your nonsense, and a great one will do it in private unless you really deserve it in public. Alya is a teenager moved by a good story and nice words but seriously Marinette is her friend. She should treat her like one.

Alya's part in that intervention- All of them in the wrong, every last one. Firstly my closest friends in the world wouldn't do that nonsense even when we were teens. They let me know if they were coming over and did not break boundaries even in friendships you should have boundaries they exist for a reason. As a group, they all broke Marinette's boundaries and in trying to "help" they did not consider she was not ready to talk and tried to force it out of her. Alya as her closest friend only encourage that nonsense.

Alya is impulsive- The incident with Chloe's locker and throwing around assumptions is dangerous. The fact she broke into someone's locker was bad enough. She had no right to do that and the fact a few fans of the show support her on that makes me question the norms of their environment.

Encouraging Marinette with the Adrien situation - We have all had a crush. we have all been the friend that encourages hope and some delusions (within the line of reason) tell me what friend encourages someone to be a STALKER. Alya should have placed some reasonable control on her girl. The day I get that crazy I expect my friend to slap some sense in me. As a friend, you tell your friend the truth whether they want to hear it or not. ALya should have told Marinette "Hey girl, I love you but this is stalker behaviour and I cannot condone this so let's get rid of his schedule and all those photos and let's talk about healthy ways have having a crush" Once I again I love the show and I am letting them all off as they are teenagers but I have to address these things. No character is perfect they all have flaws and criticism will always exist it's how one handles it.

[littlechaoticwitch]

Winx Club Rewrite: Season 4

I understand this is me being very late to the party, but that's pretty on-brand for me at this point lol

A few years ago, I started to work on a possible rewrite for Fate: The Winx Saga but it soon became this monstrous project of rewriting the entire franchise. Because while this series is one of my beloved childhood series, it is also very messy with its world-building and plotlines, as well being done dirty over and over again by its countless reboots. As much as I would have loved to create a full-on alternative universe like the ones I've seen on tumblr for years, it just took up so much of my time that could have been spent on other projects and it was starting to feel more like a chore than anything else. Eventually, I did create some fashion boards for how to translate their outfits from the show into real life, and wrote up some concept ideas for their live-action costumes, which led to me just writing up the notes I had for the rewrite to share them with y'all.

Some of these ideas were inspired by other people's rewrite of the series, some of these ideas came to me while writing this up, and a lot of these are my attempt to make sense of Winx Club's fucked-up lore. While these were originally written with a live-action reboot in mind, these could also work for an animated reboot targeted for teens/young adults.

This is probably the extent I'll do for any sort of Winx Club rewrite, but it was still fun!

-Roxanne "Roxy" Hensley is the last fairy on Earth, whose mother was an escapee of Tir Na Nog but had her wings ripped off by Grey's parents. A Native American girl who is fully into the scene culture, she is a rebellious loner who has a better time connecting with animals than with people, which is a result of her mother dying when she was still young. She is quite close with her father, who runs an animal shelter right next to Gardenia's main beach. When meeting the Winx Club, she refuses to believe magic is real but after seeing the girls trying to defend her from the Hunters, she ends up getting her own wings when trying to help out. After Morgana's death, the Hunters try to manipulate her into joining their ranks and even use the Black Circle to corrupt her fairy form, but she goes on a vengeful rampage instead, killing two of the Hunters before Bloom is able is calm her down. Once she comes back to her senses, she is allowed to keep the White Circle to remember Morgana, but the High Ladies let her keep the Black Circle as she understands the extent of its true power. She is a short lesbian with maroon-brown hair done in a wolf cut and grey eyes (which turn green when transformed), and she has a service dog named Artu.

-The Hunters consist of Grey, Dane, Sebastian (Fate!Sky), and Roman (Fate!Riven). The last members of a cult which tried to destroy all magic on Earth, but unlike their ancestors, they wish to control humanity using alchemy. Grey is the leader, with the power over water but he focuses on blood magic, whether it's using his own to heal himself to take control of someone's body using their blood. Sebastian is the second-in-command, with the ability to control a destructive blue fire to burn anything in his path. Dane acts as the spy for the group, as his control over the air allows him to have super sensitive hearing, as well as the ability to create supersonic soundwaves, turn invisible, and move as quick as the wind. Finally, there is Roman, who has the power over the earth and acts as the muscles of the group, using his super strength combined with his preference of using rocks to create fatal punches.

-This season focuses on Bloom coming to terms with being aromantic-asexual. Her relationship with Sky was a result of being caught up in the fantasy of a fairy-tale romance (which she loves reading about), and she admits to Flora that a major reason she was unhappy in the relationship was because she was forcing herself to have romantic feelings.

-This season also focuses on Bloom still grieving over Sky's death. While she no longer loved him romantically, she still cared for him and even after they had broken things off for good, she saw the potential of their friendship being rebuilt. She blames herself for his death, believing he should have stayed in Eraklyon where he was safe, but with time and the support of her friends, she learns to accept his passing in a healthy manner. Later on, she uses her experience to help Roxy overcome her own grief with losing Morgana, which helps bring the younger girl back to her senses.

-Morgana is NOT Roxy's mother, though she does come to care for Roxy like a daughter and see her as a worthy heir to her throne. Though she is angry at humanity for their sins and being so eager to chase magic away, she does understand humans were being brainwashed by the Hunters and she took her people to Tir Na Nog for safety. Unlike the others, she chooses to leave the realm in order to defend the girls from the Hunters, turning her into a mentor figure despite the fact outside of her realm drains her magic. Sadly, in the end, she sacrifices herself to close a portal which threatened to kill her people.

-The Major Fairies are known as High Ladies, with each one being in charge of a different season. The High Ladies had their magic taken from them by the Hunters and trapped in a deep slumber in their own palaces, which is why Morgana needed help from the Winx Club. Diana (Fate!Aisha) is the High Lady of Spring, Sibylla (Fate!Flora) is the High Lady of Fall, Aurora (Fate!Stella) is the High Lady of Winter, and Hestia (Fate!Musa) is the High Lady of Summer. Unlike in the cartoon, the four do not have active roles besides their connection to the Hunters, helping the Winx in the final battle, and after Morgana's death, deciding to rule Tir Na Nog as a group.

-Nex returns, and his friendship with Musa continues to grow into something more, beginning when she asks him to do her shoulder tattoo. After finding out she is a fairy, Nex comes clean and reveals his own secret; his family has been cursed for centuries, with the males destined to become werewolves, but they have learned how to handle it and became protectors instead of mindless creatures. Despite her originally wanting to break the curse, Musa learns to accept it and after spending more time together, the two decide to start a relationship (especially since Musa feels ready to start looking for love again)

-The other love interests (Brandon, Timmy, Nabu, and Helia) do not appear in this season, as they all have graduated and went straight to working. Both Nabu and Brandon are preparing themselves for their roles as king consorts, Timmy decided to stay at Red Fountain to become its potential headmaster one day, and Helia has gone back to pursuing her art career, where she has started to teach at a school.

-Bloom works at a normal pet store, Stella works at a small clothing store, Flora works at Vanessa's flower shop, Tecna works at a video game store, Musa works at a bartender, and Aisha gets a job as a yoga studio

-Things which shall be excluded from this season: The band plotline (except maybe one episode where the Winx pretends to be a band to lure the Hunters, but Musa is the lead singer while Bloom plays guitar), Love & Pet store, the extra wings, the Ethereal Fairies, the Gifts of Destiny (Sophix is used as a design for Diana's followers, Lovix is used a design for Aurora's followers, & the Black Gift is used as inspiration for Roxy's corrupted form), and all the bad romance subplots (Mitzi starts off as a shallow mean girl before working with the Hunters, Jason Queen is just a potential manager who acts more like a paternal figure to Musa, and Nabu does not have to die for the sake of a bad plot)

-Enchantix is not useless against the Wizards, but due to Earth's odd magical system, the Hunters do have the advantage of being more unpredictable. Despite fairy forms not existing on Earth, Believix was created from Roxy's magical core interacting with the Winx's magic, but each girl still has to earn their form by having someone from Earth believe in magic. The form grows in strength when more people believe in the Winx Club, but it also grows when the girls believe in themselves, each other, and their own magic; unfortunately, Earth is the only realm in which the girls can use this form, as it would be useless in the Magical Dimension.

-Believix takes on a more traditional Japanese "magical girl"-inspired look, with the girls still having different styles but with uniformed pieces and different-colored hair. Bloom earned hers through Roxy, Musa earned hers though Nex, Tecna earned hers when helping a young genius named Naoki, Stella earned hers when helping a young girl named Terra, Flora earned hers through Macy, and Aisha earned hers when helping a young man named Matt.

-As an Earth fairy, Roxy would have been born in her "transformed" state (pointed ears, sharp teeth, pupil-less eyes, wings that grow with age, etc.) but due to her half-human status and being exposed to the Winx's magic, she does gain a fairy form. Her magic is connected to animals (making her the "Fairy of the Wild"), as she was born to a Spring Court Fairy. Unlike in the show, her design is closer to that of an Enchantix fairy.

-The beginning starts off with Bloom taking up a teaching job at Alfea while her friends are working hard towards their own dreams, as she feels suddenly directionless in her life. After almost three years, Bloom asks Faragonda why Earth is a forbidden place for magic and Faragonda explains that centuries ago, Earth was a magical place, but a cult of anti-magic users hunted down those with gifts. As a result, fairies hid themselves away in Tir Na Nog while witches and wizards hid themselves among the mortals, hoping for they could proudly show off their magic in public. That evening, as Bloom is doing an obstacle course with her class, a strange woman appears and Bloom defends her from four men known as the Hunters, leading to the woman revealing herself as Queen Morgana of the Earth Fairies… and she needs help finding the last fairy of Earth.

[vault-kid]

1/2 follow up question: who does Luna have a grudge against??? And how does it manifest if/when she runs into them again?

this was mostly written on my commute so apologies if its vague or poorly worded/written LOLs

Alphonse: This one is i guess pretty self explanatory and obvious? but her grudge started a long time ago, when she was a kid. Luna was a shy kid growing up, but once those pre-teen years hit, her 'sense of justice' (if you can call it that?) also developed. She got into a lot of fights by defending herself or Amata, sometimes questioning the Vault's rules and structure (most of the time this was just done innocently out of curiosity) and obviously she questioned the reason why everyone else disliked her so much? The Overseer being the first. The way he treated her and James, and even Jonas, was something she never understood at first. Him being insanely disapproving of her friendship with Amata pissed Luna off beyond belief, and the thought "I wish he'd drop dead right there and then" has passed through her head countless of times, even as a kid. The day of the escape caused this grudge to grow obviously, so by the time Luna saw him again during Trouble in the Homefront , she had already thought about all the ways she could hurt him. She didn't hurt him like that, though, she couldn't. Since her Speech is one of her top skills, she was able to persuade him without the use of ... physical violence... but she did shut him up verbally. Very dry, very apathetic and cynical (almost cruel) towards him in particular. There's just no sympathy with him, and I like to think that part of the reason why Alphonse steps down as Overseer is cus Luna (aside from the actual canon dialog, yada yada) told him off as a bad father and a failure and hit him where it hurt most (girl told him to kill himself in an indirect and sophisticated way).

The most obvious would be Butch. I won't really talk much about this in complete full detail cus id love to actually talk about their relationship in depth soon but, she has a pretty deep grudge against him for a specific reason. While it was kept a secret from literally everyone else in the Vault, their relationship was rather solid (as solid as hormone-driven, sex repressed teenagers can be) until some shit happened, and Butch left her to deal with the shitshow(s) alone. She doesn't hold a grudge against him for choosing something over her, but more so for leaving her to deal with the aftermath of it all lol. Running into him in the Vault again was whatever. It was awkward, but she never thought they'd see each other again out in the Wasteland, so she actually treated him kindly then. It's only in Rivet City where all of her feelings towards him (both negative and positive) came rushing back, and her grudge resurfacing. She really does have a bad habit of holding things over people's heads, so she'd often times just snap at Butch and remind him how he's treated her and what he did (honestly deserved). There is way more to it, but thats all im saying for now!

Dr. Li: Ok hear me out. Luna's 'grudge' on Li is a bit weird, maybe a bit irrational? idk you be the judge. Luna didn't really have a grudge against Li at first, but she definitely did NOT vibe with her ever. I think her 'grudge' began once she found out Madison had a thing for James, (Luna tried pushing that aside considering she was helping with P.P., but...). However, after James' death, Luna completely shut herself off from everything, and everyone related to the project and James, and that obviously meant Madison (and the B.O.S, etc) for like, a looong time. Because of this, Madison would then treat Luna like shit, as cynical as she always is, and would go on about how she 'couldn't allow the same cause of its abandonment 19 years ago to be the reason it gets delayed more'. All of that upset Luna more aside from grieving James, so she clearly grew a dislike for Li, and whenever they interacted she would close herself off or be cold. Their personalities clashed, both grieving the same person in different ways and Luna knew this, but the way Li made her feel about many things was the cause for that small grudge.

[kidcharlemagnex6]

Wendy Testaburger is NOT Selfish!

As I've been exploring Tumblr, I've noticed several posts regarding the relationship between Stan Marsh and Wendy Testaburger in South Park. Most of these posts are primarily concerned with defending the relationship between the two by pointing out all of the ways that they DO care about each other. However, I've noticed that most of them try to look at from Stan's point of view. I would like to take a different approach and examine the situation from Wendy's perspective by comparing her to a somewhat similar character: Lisa Simpson.

On the surface, Wendy and Lisa are a lot alike: both are intelligent pre-teen girls who take their schoolwork seriously and believe in fiercely advocating for issues that they're passionate about. But when you really look into their characters, you'll notice that Wendy is actually less selfish than Lisa; this, in my view, is down to three major flaws on Lisa's part that Wendy doesn't have: Lisa just uses her schoolwork to stroke her ego, only speaks about social issues to get attention, and refuses to respect other people's choices.

First, let's look at how the two girls approach their schoolwork. As stated earlier, Lisa's concern about her schoolwork, when you really look at it, only extends to how good she can make herself look with it. I think this is best shown in the episode where Lisa gets the chance to skip ahead to the third grade; Lisa was very enthusiastic at first, but once it became clear that there were plenty of third graders who were just as good as her, if not better (Bart getting pushed back to third grade, notwithstanding), she jumped at the chance to go back to second grade and be the "big fish" again. If Wendy was ever given the chance to skip a grade level, I'm sure she would take the opportunity with gusto and do her best to persevere, if not reject the offer because she doesn't want to leave her friends, especially not Stan. That, in my view, would prove to me that Wendy doesn't care that much about being the best, so long as she can do her best.

The next point I want to bring up is both girls' activism. Neither one of them is afraid to speak up for causes that they believe need more attention. But if you pay careful attention, you'll notice that the difference is in the motivations. For one example, when Lisa attempted to join the football team but discovered that the team already had girls and were using environmentally friendly materials, Lisa simply left in tears; if Wendy were in that situation, she would either happily join the team or leave without a word. Another example is how they react when others get rewards or positions that they think were undeserved. When Wendy was trying to prove that Cartman plagiarized that one essay, she was doing so TO prove that the essay was plagiarized. On the other hand, Lisa tried to get Bart demoted from that little newscast they were both working on simply because she was jealous of the idea of him being her equal; same as when Bart learned to play the drums. So, when you take those factors into account, you can conclude that Wendy's ego is not as swollen as Lisa's since she actually tries to expose injustices and would be proud of other people's accomplishments and talents, whereas Lisa would find a way to snuff those out.

The last point I want to look at is both girls' love lives. The biggest difference is obvious: Wendy has been dating Stan for almost as long as the whole show has lasted, while none of Lisa's relationships have lasted longer than a single episode. In my opinion, this is due to one major reason: Wendy is more respectful of other people's choices than Lisa is. You can best see this in the episode where Lisa tried to start a relationship with Nelson Muntz. First off, she never expressed any interest in Nelson before that episode and was explicitly trying to "change" Nelson in both appearance and behavior to mold him into her idea of a "gentleman." Also, she clearly tried to automatically appoint herself Nelson's "girlfriend" and gave up on him once it became clear that she can't mold him into anything. Wendy, on the other hand, asked Stan on a date the way you're really supposed to and has never expressed discontent with issues as minor as Stan's fashion sense or love of fart jokes; therefore, it seems safe to conclude that Lisa would have looked for any excuse to leave Stan over some petty bullcrap while Wendy is genuinely in love with him. And it's not just romance that this can apply to. When Wendy advocated to have vegetarian options added to the school's cafeteria menu, she only did so to give vegetarians the options they want; Lisa, on the other hand, would have outright demanded that the entire menu be made vegetarian without giving any consideration for any students who might need to keep meat and such in their diets; she even abandoned one of the very few real friends she did have just because she wasn't a vegetarian (and really likes horse meat), which Ms. Hoover (her teacher) admitted would happen. So all in all, Wendy wants to love and be loved while Lisa just wants a Ken doll she can dress up and show off.

So with all of that said, I think it would be safe to conclude that Wendy Testaburger is a far better character than Lisa Simpson. Wendy actually cares about doing the right thing, legitimately respects other people's autonomy, and is more than happy to love people for who they are. Lisa Simpson, on the other hand, is a selfish conformist who just wants to be fawned over by yes men. You can also see this in how they view their respective families. While we haven't seen too much attention given to Wendy's view on her family, she seems to have a fairly high opinion on them and most likely wouldn't trade them in for anything. Lisa, on the other hand, would gladly abandon her family, despite all they have done for her, for one that's more "highbrow." So, in my opinion, Wendy seems destined to have a much better and more joyful life than Lisa because she cares more about being happy than being right.

'Nuff said.

[gaymormonmike]

MARGINALIZED

My focus recently has been on my marginalization as a gay, divorced, single man in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I had an insight last week as I studied scriptures and pondered and prayed about marginalization in general.

What does it mean if someone is marginalized?

Today, marginalize refers to the act of treating a person or group as though they are insignificant by isolating and/or disempowering them. The term marginalized applies to the person or group that is treated insignificantly, pushed to the margins of society and rendered powerless. Marginalization is the result of discrimination. Discrimination exists in many forms, such as racism, sexism, ableism, ageism, homophobia and xenophobia. Whether or not the discrimination is overt or covert, it marginalizes others and that is unacceptable.

As I thought about that some insights came to mind.

I was a small child marginalized in many ways. I was a Highly Sensitive Person in a family that did not like a HSP boy. I had a father who wanted a boy like his ideal, the man he never was. I grew up early, knowing I was not acceptable, something was wrong in me. I lived in the ghetto of a small Midwestern town. That side of town was regarded as trash. Child abuse was common and just part of life. We did not know any different. I went into a profession, Registered Nurse, dominated by females. Once again, I was marginalized as a "male nurse."  When I was 13, I understood I was attracted to my male friends. I knew that was wrong and I felt so different and so alone and so marginalized. After I joined the LDS church, I accepted that my sexual orientation was a sin that would result in eternal punishment, and I fought against it so hard. I got married, had children and grandchildren and tried to be happy. I was on the outer edge, and I was a man divided against himself.

As I think about the members of my ward and the many good people who pursue being good, I wonder how many of them are marginalized in some aspect.  Maybe they all fall into some marginalized group.

LBGTQA+ and allies

People of color

People of African American descent with family history of slavery

People of religious groups who may not be in favor for various reasons, Jews, Hindus, Buddhists, Mormons, Catholics, Jehovah Witnesses, Snake Baptists, Holy Rollers, Whirlimng Dervishes, etc. etc.

People raised in the wrong part of town.

Single parents, Orphans, Adoptees, Adopted parents, childless parents,

Shamed, self-loathers, want to be someone else’s,

People who project onto others, those projected on, those who use transference to defend themselves,

Married people, teen-agers, pre-teenagers,

People who went to schools that were not the best, community colleges, virtual colleges, home schooled, schools dominated by non-white races.

Latino people, pickers, illegal aliens, people with foreign accents that are not desirable,

People with everyday jobs, housekeepers, hotel cleaners, waiters and waitresses, sewer workers, garbage collectors, used car salesman, scammers, phone solicitors.

People with smelly homes, broken down porches with appliances and furniture on them, uncared for yards.

People with dirty children in bare feet and dirty clothes

Appalachians, hillbillys, southerners, racists, bigots, nazis, KKK, Haters,

women, girls,

Fat people, people with glasses, ugly people, people who spit in public,

Bullies, fighters, controllers, get their wayers

Abusers, sexual, emotional, physical abusers, their victims their survivors

Criminals, jail birds, cons, ex-cons, police, fireman, law enforcement

Lawyers, doctors, nurses,

Republicans, Democrats, Conservatives, Liberals, Communists, Fascists, Libertarians

Rich people, people with no worries or cares or need to help.

People of privilege who can have everything they want.

People who like snakes and lizards

People with odd looking hair, dyed or long or wild or standing up or part shaved, or all shaved or just different

People who are animals, dogs, cats, deer, pigs

People from Poland, Russia, Mexico, China, Asia, people with slanty eyes, with red dots on their foreheads, Muslims, people with turbans, women covered with burkas,

Blondes, especially female

Single people, unmarried, divorced, windowed,

People addicted to drugs, alcohol, pornography, sex, working out,

Lovers of fame, fortune, liars, thieves, politicians,

Heart breakers, non- committers, seducers, pedophiles, enticers, embracers, touchers, feelers,

Homeless people, beggars, street people, shopping cart people.

Atheists, Agnostics, God haters and profaners, 

People who believe they are saved, condemners, better than thouers, people who know it all, prideful people.

Have I left anybody out? Or have I failed to insult you or the group you align yourself with? Or the group you want to forget you ever were a part of? Or the group you are happy to be a part of and do not appreciate being lumped into here?

I also fear that we will compare who has it worse. I say that each situation, whether of our making or by our birth or others’ choices, are legitimate. I have heard or read of thousands who had it worse than me. It did not take away my issues and what I go through. Your trials and tribulations and joys are yours and deserve the same reverence and respect of all others.

These words cannot define or describe the people they may represent. They cannot be equal in their results or effects. First there is the person who experiences these words in their lives. Each is different and unique and deals with a myriad of ways.. Some can turn these experiences into stellar personality adaptations. The environment that you grow up in and the attitudes of those who influence you can change the effect of these situations. They can become a reason to overcome or a reason to despair. Your faith can change how you view life, and its' vagaries can change the outcomes. The options you have or the perceived options you have can change how you react to all situations. The intensity of the experience and its effects on you can vary greatly. It is true that some of these are a result of things you cannot control or change. Others have the potential to be choices that you can control or change. But to some degree we all have traits or situations that others judge, feel superior to or dislike enough to not want to acknowledge your worth or value. If we examine ourselves, we will find we are both victims of and people who sometimes, marginalize others.

My question is how any of us can feel superior or look down on anyone else, when we are all in some way marginalized people?

I am a strong believer in Heavenly Father and Mother and my Savior Jesus Christ. I attest that he made all of us, everyone on the lists above. He loves us fully and completely as we are. He wants us to be better, but He loves us with our faults and offers a way back home to His side. Many of the people I listed above are people that I am either a part of or have judged in my life. I seek to be a better man, a better queer man, a better Christ-like man by realizing that the people at church and in my social sphere that marginalize me are themselves marginalized in some capacity. My goal is to help us all see that and accept that we can love one another because we are different and we have incredible stories and incredible pasts and that we can all become more loving, accepting and affirming.

[pangolinheart]

FFXIVWrite 2023 DAY 11 - ONCE BITTEN, TWICE SHY

Some more SidWoL for those of you who enjoy it! I'm reasonably happy with how this one turned out, so it might get us it's own name later. If anyone enjoyed it, let me know and I can try more with this pairing.

(Also, full disclosure, the universe apparently didn't want me to write this one, because my power went out last night while I was writing and I had to hand-write more than half of it. In the dark. By flashlight. Also Tumblr Mobile tried to sabotage my formatting and removed all my italics, but it should be fixed now.)

Rating: Teen Genre: Angst Characters: Sidurgu Orl, Z'rhiki Irhi (Warrior of Light) Pairings: Sidurgu Orl/Warrior of Light Word Count: 2,333 Content Warnings: Implied character death

It was the same dream as always; the grassy plain, the blinding sun, his parents kneeling on the ground. He knew they were his parents even though their features had grown blurrier with time. That was just how this dream went. How much of it was a memory, and how much of it was just a memory of the dream? There was a man in chainmail standing over them, sword pulled back, about to swing. “Don’t look,” His father told him. He never listened. 

He blinked. Did he? He must have, because suddenly the dream around him had shifted. The lush green meadows were replaced by windswept tundra. His feet sank not into soft soil, but snow. A frigid gale buffeted his face with icy snowflakes. The sky above had grown dark with thick, grey clouds, the only light the moonlight that slipped between them. The man with the sword was the same, but this time, kneeling in the snow was… Fray? 

Wait, that wasn’t right. That wasn’t how it had happened. 

He hadn’t even seen Fray die. 

“Don’t look,” Fray’s voice was as measured and calm as ever. 

“FRAY-“ He started to call, but another barrage of bitter wind and hail made him flinch. 

When he recovered, he was no longer cold. The snow was gone, replaced by hard-packed dirt. Around him rose neither rolling hills nor frozen peaks, but soaring cliffs of sandstone. Just over the clifftops, the sun was beginning to set. This… didn’t look familiar. Where was he? 

This time, the man had changed as well, though he remained frozen in the same pose. Rather than the blue and silver regalia of Ishgard’s Temple Knights, he wore the warped black and red armor of a Garlean Soldier. The longsword that had been clutched in his hands was now some sort of modified blade, though the handle curved past the grip, like a machinist’s pistol. He looked down, and his stomach dropped as if it was full of stones. 

Kneeling in the dry dirt was not his parents, not Fray, but her.  

The last rays of the sinking sun splashed orange across the landscape and mingled with the hues of her mismatched eyes as she looked up at him, forcing a reassuring smile. 

“Don’t look, Sid,” she said, and this time the blade swung. 

“NO!” He lunged forward, but he knew that he would be too late. 

He was always too late. 

Just before the warm blood could splatter on his face, Sidurgu woke with a start. He sat up abruptly, eager to put any sort of distance he could between himself and the dream. With the heel of his hand, he pushed damp hair from his forehead and out of his eyes. He was shaking, he realized. He took a moment to catch his breath before casting his gaze to the bed beside him, to find the woman next to him dozing peacefully under the blankets. He didn’t know what he thought he would see, but he was relieved, nonetheless. 

Dammit. 

He had tried so hard not to end up here. Not “here” in his bed above the Forgotten Knight, Rhiki curled up next to him – he obviously hadn’t tried that hard – but here… 

Caring. 

He had told himself from the start not to get attached. At first it was because their arrangement was temporary. She was there as a favor to a fellow Dark Knight and her predecessor’s friend. She would help him defend this mysterious girl until more permanent arrangements could be made, and in exchange for her time he would teach her some of his tricks. And then, presumably, she would leave. Simple and transactional. 

But then he became the “more permanent arrangements”, and she kept stopping by. It was nice to have another adult to talk to, so he didn’t complain, but still he had said to himself, don’t get attached.  

He had reminded himself over and over again.  

Don’t get attached, he had thought as he watched her regale Rielle with tales of her travels. 

Don’t get attached, he had told himself as she helped him stitch and bandage the wounds he had hidden from his charge.  

Don’t get attached, he had repeated as she laughed at her own joke over drinks in the dead of night. 

He knew what would happen if he started to like her, if he started to care about her. He knew because it was the same thing that always happened to people he cared about: something terrible. Something that would eat away at him day after day after day. Something that would tear open all of the healing wounds. Something that would hurt. 

He should know better. 

Once bitten, twice shy, the saying went. What about twice bitten? Thrice? 

How many times would he have to learn the same lesson? 

Until it stuck, apparently. 

Rielle, at least, was different. Rielle was here, where he could protect her. Or at least die trying, his cynicism added. But Z’rhiki was the Warrior of Light (though, even were she not, she wasn’t the type to stay put for too long.) She was constantly being called from one crisis to the next. Wherever the battle was, there she was. He didn’t even know where she went half the time, at least until she returned. He no longer expected her to lose interest or voluntarily break off contact. What he expected now was much, much worse. 

At least she had told them where she was headed this time: Ala Mhigo, to fight a seemingly impossible war. He couldn’t go with her, of course. He had Rielle to think about. She probably wouldn’t have had him anyway. All he could do was wait – wait to hear from the rumors of strangers that the Warrior of Light had died hundreds of malms away. He had seen people die, and he had not seen people die but had known it was happening, and that he was powerless to stop it, and he wasn’t sure which one was worse. 

His heart was still racing. He took a few more deep breaths to quiet it as he tried to scrub the lingering traces of the dream from his mind. He had enough painful memories without adding ones that hadn’t even happened yet. He leaned back and planted his hands on either side of him, tilting his head back and feeling one of the vertebrae in his neck pop. It was impossible to find a pillow, or any type of surface, that accommodated his horns, so he always woke up sore. Even so, he preferred waking to a stiff neck over waking from... other things. 

His movement must have disturbed Rhiki’s sleep, because she stirred next to him. She made a few quiet, mumbled sounds, then opened her eyes. After blinking a few times to clear the bleary haze of sleep from them, she turned her head to look at him. Seeing him wide awake, she propped herself up on the backs of her elbows. “Y’alright?” She asked, words still slurred from drowsiness.  

He nodded, not trusting his voice quite yet. 

“Nightmare?” She asked. Her tone was sympathetic. She had her fair share of nightmares too, he knew. He doubted there had ever been a Dark Knight without them. 

“Yes.” There was no point in lying about it. “It’s nothing. You can go back to sleep. I’m fine.” 

She continued to stare at him, showing no signs of accepting his offer. “Wanna talk about it?” 

“No.” 

“Okay.” She didn’t sound surprised. The silence lingered for a moment. “Is there anything I can do?” 

He shook his head. “I’m alright. Don’t worry about me.” 

She eyed him for a few more seconds, and he sunk back into the bed, hoping that lying down would appease her. It seemed to, and she slipped back fully beneath the blankets as well. 

He lay there for a few minutes, fighting with himself over whether to say anything. He shouldn’t, he knew. He should just let her fall back asleep. Keep his stupid mouth shut. It would be better for both of them. 

He was usually such a quick learner. 

Instead, he rolled onto his side and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her back against his chest. It startled a small “mrrp!” from her throat. She didn’t protest, but she did crane her neck to look at him over her shoulder, inquisitive. He wasn’t usually the type to initiate physical contact. She was normally the one who insisted on lying against him or on top of him. 

“What?” She asked. 

“Nothing,” He grumbled back, though the feeling of her warm skin against his, the rise and fall of her stomach under his arm, did soothe him somewhat. It anchored him to that moment, so his mind wouldn’t drift to the bloodstained past or the uncertain future. It reminded him that she was really there. 

Once again, he should just leave it at that. 

“You shouldn’t go to Ala Mhigo,” he said after a minute had passed. 

She looked over her shoulder again. “What? Why?” 

“It’s not your fight. It’s got nothing to do with you. Don’t you have enough battles without picking up other people’s?” 

“Sid, I can’t just not go.” She insisted, though gently. He had expected this was how the conversation would go. 

“Why not?” He countered. 

She faltered, though, to her credit, only for a second. “They need me.” 

He wanted to point out that everyone needed her. Always. 

Including him. 

He huffed, his breath rustling her hair. “Do they? Why? You’re a formidable fighter – no one will deny you that, least of all me – but you’re no general, or tactician. You’re not even really a soldier. So, what, exactly, do they need you for? One woman, can’t turn the tides against an entire army, even one as strong as you.” 

“Well,” she paused to consider this, finally looking away from him and resting her head back on the pillow. “They need all the help that they can get. I’ve fought the Garleans before, even if it wasn’t in an all-out war. I guess, if nothing else, my being there will be good for morale.” 

“Do you even want to go?” 

“I-“ She stopped herself before she could give him a real answer. “It doesn’t really matter. The Scions have decided to help, and it’s not like I can just quit.” 

Of course she couldn’t. She was one of those “hero” types that he usually couldn’t stand. Self-sacrificing to a fault. Never able to rest when there was someone in need of saving. It didn’t matter what she wanted, or how she felt. She had to go. She had to help her friends. Were the Scions her friends? If they were, then why did she always end up here, with him, in a shitty inn room above a shitty tavern. He didn’t have any delusions about his own importance to her, of course - maybe it didn’t matter if it was him at all - but he had started to realize that when she was at her breaking point, she came here. He didn’t know why, but he knew that she never told the Scions any of the things she told him – about the nightmares or the pain or the guilt or the anger. She’d said as much to him once. He’d never met any of them, and didn’t particularly hope to, but he knew that for some reason, she thought she had to hide all of that from them. But when they called, or whenever the world needed saving, she came running. She did want to help people; of that he had no doubt – she was friendly and kind and probably too empathetic. But he was beginning to suspect that, in addition to all the good intentions and noble ideas, this was just her favorite way to hurt herself. Some sort of bizarre masochism. She knew it was going to hurt her, scar her, but she was happy to do it anyway. 

He didn’t say any of this, though. This time he was smart enough not to say anything at all. 

She didn’t say anything either, and he was starting to wonder if she had decided to try and fall back asleep when she said: “Why do you suddenly care so much about me going to Ala Mhigo.” 

He sighed. Why did he care? He had tried telling himself not too. He had reminded himself what it had felt like to lose Fray, more than a year ago. Did he really want to put himself through that again? 

Maybe he was a bit of a masochist too. 

“No particular reason,” He replied, glad she couldn’t really see his face from where her head was tucked under his chin. “Just… a gut feeling.” 

This time she didn’t just turn her head, but squirmed around in his hold until she was facing him. She didn’t look irritated, just… regretful. Normally she would have teased him for showing such an interest in her affairs, but she must have sensed that the mood was different tonight. She peered up at him, but he carefully avoided her gaze. “Sid, you don���t have to worry about me. You know I’ll be fine, and that I’ll be back to pester you before you know it.” 

“I know.” He lied. He didn’t think even she believed that. But these days, it seemed, they were both in the business of lying to themselves. He hoped it was true. He wanted it to be true. But he couldn’t shake that nagging feeling.  

“Good,” She yawned widely.  

He finally released her, unable to think of anything more to say. He had known she would say no, but for some reason he had felt like it was important to ask anyway. He would just have to trust her. Maybe this time would be different. Maybe she would be someone he didn’t lose. 

He doubted it, but it was a nice thought, anyway. 

[graziellathedancingqueen]

connor murphy x reader part 1

requested by @fictionalincorrectquotes

summary: reader stands up for Connor in the cafeteria and defends him when the teacher is getting mad because of his phone in class.

word count: 1110 (part 1 and 2)

warnings: reader has anxiety?

pairing: Connor Murphy x reader

a/n: i hope you like it because i definitely like it!! If I made any mistakes please tell me <33

★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆

First day of school after summer holidays. Great. The worst day of school. Well one of the worst days of school. Always the days after holidays. It's so hard going back after maybe having the time of your life.

That wasn't the case for Connor Murphy. It also wasn't the case for y/n. Both had been spending the holidays at home all day. Their families didn't seem to like that and they were really happy to get them out of the house. 

Now both the teens were walking down the same hallway but facing each other. They straight up ran into each other as they were both looking on the ground which ended with him shoving y/n to the ground, looking at them and just walking away. Y/n was now thinking //should i just keep laying on the ground or should I try to get up? Laying here isn't that bad// until they feel someone gently kicking their leg "hey... um... I'm sorry about my brother. Y/n, right? We have history together... in... five minutes" Zoe Murphy says holding out her hand for y/n to take and help her up. "Don't worry. It was my fault anyways. You're Zoe then?" Y/n answers unable to meet her eyes. "Yeah. Zoe Murphy. Do you know where the class room is? I don't really understand our new time table" the girl says smiling at y/n "Sure... we have exactly two minutes to get there. Let's go. Is your brother okay?" y/n tries to keep the conversation going looking over at Zoe. "You're really asking me if he's okay? He pushed you. Not the other way around." Zoe says looking rather surprised. "He seemed upset." "That's because he hates school and people. He's probably skipping our history class" Zoe responds shrugging before opening the door to the classroom. It's almost a wonder but as they enter they see no one other than Connor Murphy in the back of the class. "How...?" y/n starts. "Must've sneaked past us as we were talking and you were... laying on the ground." Zoe says not questioning anything. Y/n gives her a quick look before the bell rings and they have to sit down.

Class starts and the teacher keeps asking pointless questions as Connor keeps having an eye on y/n, who keeps picking the skin on their fingers while their leg keeps shaking uncontrollably. Mannerisms he knows very well from himself.

Almost two hours later it's time for lunch. Finally. But there's nothing y/n hates more that the cafeteria. Yet y/n has to go there to at least get the food and leave. Maybe sit down under a tree in the garden or something.

But just as they enter the cafeteria they hear Jared say something about Connor's hair and Evan laughing about it. It wasn't really their fault but for whatever reason y/n was not having it. "God can you like shut the fuck up for once. Seriously though try to talk when you have something smart to say. And as we all know that's really rare (ik he's kinda smart just ignore that. We all know that he's mean sometimes) you should shut up right now, turn around and leave." y/n says before just walking past the three boys that are all just staring in shock. Once again Connor just turns around and leaves but not before flashing y/n the smallest smile. Jared just looks over at Evan "whatever. They're freaks. Let's just get our lunch and find a place to sit"

[dolleminas]

Hey

I'm a follower of yours but would rather remain anonymous because this is an extremely sensitive topic

I am in a relationship I am starting to think might be unsafe, but I constantly doubt myself and don't know if I'm blowing things out of proportion in my head.

I think I just need a clear cut answer from someone else about if the following things are as big of red flags as my gut says they are, and if so I really need advice on how to navigate leaving (we rent together and share finances)

- met a guy when we were teens in highschool, he was sweet, dorky, self identified as a feminist, was a good friend to me for a year or so and then asked me out. He was a really loving and gentle partner, I met his family, he really spoiled me romantically and we always had fun together. We dated consistently for a year and a half, and then started dating on and off "because we were busy"

- when we were dating on and off, (not officially exclusive at the time this incident happened, but I assumed we were because he called me his girlfriend and said he loved me) he had sex with a male friend of his multiple times and consistently sexted with him without my knowledge

- he sent this male friend nudes of mine as part of their sexting twice that I know of, and potentially more than twice, and in one situation nudes I know he asked me for the nude photos specifically for that purpose (when I read the texts between he and this guy a year or so later, the guy asked for pictures of certain body parts and me posed in a unique way, and I remembered my boyfriend requesting once that I send him nudes with those specifications, and thinking it was weird at the time because he had never asked for something that specific, or of that area of the body before)

- not too long after he broke that relationship off, but still 6+ months before I knew about it, he started hooking up with a girl and told her that he was essentially just using me for sex, but that I knew that he was seeing other people and was ok with it because I only wanted a sexual relationship too (I didn't know, and wouldn't have been having a sexual relationship if I knew those terms)

- when shit hit the fan and I found out about those messages because we shared social media passwords, I called him and told him my suspicions. He was extremely angry, extremely manipulative, and I tried to guilt trip me for having even signed into his social media (something we both agreed to doing), and said the pictures that were sent were just images from online (I couldn't technically see the photos because Instagram photo messages disappear after being viewed, but the descriptions and conversation very directly hinted and said that it was me- the conversation included very unique details of my body and personality that I know would not be easy to find online just scrolling, and things you wouldn't know about a random onlyfans girl or stranger)

- He later ended up calling and confessing, giving multiple excuses, telling sob stories about being overcome with guilt but never feeling like it was the right time to tell me, and then telling me he understood if I left, he understood if I turned him in, he felt like he deserved to be punished

- I left him but tried to keep our friendship on positive terms to hopefully get him to confess in writing, while talking to two friends of mine and getting advice on wether or not I could report him for what he did, but also because I still had feelings for him and was for some reason giving him the benefit of the doubt

- One friend ended up breaking my trust and confronting him about my plans to report, (not because she didn't want me to, but because she was angry at him and trying to defend me)

- He ended up completely blocking me out for a few weeks

- I was devastated and felt exposed and everything that was happening was triggering my PTSD. I felt like I was relieving my previous sexual traumas.

- for some reason, call it love or teenage stupidity, I ended up talking to him again when he decided to stop being angry at me. Then a few months later decided to start dating him again. Looking back I really don't know why. In my mind, this incident had been a blip in what was otherwise a fantastic and steady relationship, and this didn't fit with my perception of him as a kind, funny, caring person- so instead of recognizing that he wasn't, I opted to essentially pretend it never happened.

- things ramped up quickly, we moved in after another year together, started sharing finances, he helped me through a medical scare, and held me through recovery when I was assaulted by a dad I was nannying for. He did the majority of the housework and work work, I mostly just focused on odd jobs and college. I put things behind me but always set clear boundaries. No porn use. No bdsm language in the bedroom. No cheating. No repeat incidents like that. I wouldn't send him full nudes or anything with my face or tattoos in it, and he couldn't screenshot even if I did. He would respect my sexual boundaries and never push for more than I was initiating.

- We decided to have kids. Please no judgement here. I know now that that was a stupid and immature call. With my health issues I was scared I would lose my ovaries eventually, possibly even uterus, and my emotions about desperately wanting to be a mother got the better of me

- while I was pregnant with our first the boundaries started to slip. Jokes about bdsm language. More unbalanced dynamics during sex, and more expectation that I was ok with being submissive. Constant "joking" nagging about how infrequent/vanilla the sex was. Then eventually pressure to try new positions, new scenarios, to try oral sex again in spite of my sexual trauma with it, to try anal sex. All of which eventually happened. Then the bdsm speak in the bedroom took off, and gone was the gentle loving sex with eye contact and mutual pleasure, he was pushing my head, and talking about me "letting him use my body for his pleasure", calling me submissive, generally using a weird tone and introducing a dynamic where if he asked something I was expected to just do it. I started consenting to sex even when I didn't want to because his moods were worse on the days when we didn't, and I didn't want to hear about how boring and prude I was.

- Baby arrived. Our romantic relationship seemed completely back to normal. My sex drive was back and sex was good when I was the one initiating it, and I felt like I had more say again. We were generally happy for months. He is a great dad, he cooks and cleans more than I do, he's more patient than me, he gets down and plays with our kids when I don't or can't, and always seems to have more energy than me.

- got pregnant again, normalcy started to fade and once again felt like I lost control sexually

-had second baby- family life going great, again, things romantically were doing well, but the sex was still very unbalanced and uncomfortable, and now was expected to almost exclusively be anal or deep throating, with a lot of ass smacking and condescending language. He started using new words constantly, always wanting to try new things, and started referencing porn in jokes really often.

- I got suspicious he was watching it and asked flat out. He said no but seemed off. Asked again and he admitted he was, but said he didn't think I would care or have a problem with it, because he only watched it alone and it never impacted our sex life- rather filled a void when we weren't haven't sex. He insisted only the most vanilla content, and for some reason fixated on insisting that it was milf content and only of women with my body type. That he was using ethical sites and it was all people who were consenting and happy to be in that business. He also offhandedly said a lot of it was coming directly from people who were "self publishing" the content (never found out what that was a reference to since he insisted it wasn't onlyfans or a dating site, but I'm guessing either it was one of those and I just didn't find out, or that it was NSFW subreddits)

- I told him I was uncomfortable and wanted him to stop if he wanted a relationship with me. He said he already had and could go on that way, he just wanted me to be comfortable. I asked him to promise it wasn't anything I'd be uncomfortable with and I very specifically listed- potentially underage content, rape or rape play, sleep, beastiality, outright pedophilia, anything where the person was clearly drugged or drunk. He assured me he wasn't watching any of that.

- the next day he backtracked and was mad at me. He said he had a problem and an addiction, but that I was treating him "like a monster" and that it was unfair for me to ask because I should know he wasn't watching anything unsavory. He said he always wanted to tell me but was scared of being judged, and it never felt like the right time, and now I was confirming his fear of judgement for being sad/angry/uncomfortable.

- I decide since we have each other's phone pins and he's previously made it clear I can use his phone to do a brief check, keyword search terms I'd be uncomfortable with in his browser history. Immediately things come up in his recent history, but also going back as far as before I was pregnant with our first child. Constant porn use, rape porn, "barely legal", Sleep porn, anal rape, violent sex, sub/dom dynamics, deepthroat rape, crying, vomiting, almost all on Pornhub or from subreddits bragging about their "nonconsent" collections.

- I confronted him again. He lied multiple times. I told him I was suspicious, and asked if he'd be comfortable showing me his history. He said he would later, at home, and that he had no problem because he had nothing to hide. If I hadn't previously seen it, with how convincing he was being and the way he was shifting the tone, that would've completely disarmed me and I never would've looked. I told him I knew, and I was aware what content and the whole tone changed. Of course he's watching barely legal! He's in his early twenties, why would I expect him to watch "older ladies". The rape porn isn't "real rape" it's just CNC. The crying and vomiting during oral content are because he's insecure about his penis size and was using that for validation. The sleeping and drugged content is clearly staged, and also he was just testing it out and he didn't end up liking it (multiple searches over months of time, I call bullshit). I tell him that it's all wrong and disgusting. That it is a betrayal of my trust and the promises he made me. That the lying and gaslighting about it was a betrayal. That the content is extremely triggering for me because a lot of the videos were almost exactly things that had happened to me while I was sexually abused in the past, that he knew had impacted me deeply. That I was angry at him for even watching porn in the first place because I am so vocal about the issues in the industry. That I was disgusted that he had been bringing those ideas and that language and those positions into our actual sex life without my knowledge of their sources.

- He apologized over and over and over and over and again I eventually just decided to put it behind me. Told him I wouldn't have sex with him till he stopped watching porn, and I had recovered from the stress and trauma of that incident. He promised to go to sex addict meetings, to restart therapy, and to go to couples therapy.

- All that lasted about two weeks. Then we were back to having sex, and he never ended up doing the therapy or the meetings.

- I put it all out of mind and focused on the good in our relationship. We have fun. We parent together well. We laugh together, a lot. Dates are still nice. I'm just wary and exhausted. But I'm a stay at home mom. We have kids. We're low income already, and our finances are completely tied together. We never got married so assets wouldn't even necessarily be split fairly. I'm terrified of what a custody battle would look like because he has everything in his favor. He has an income and a degree. He has family living nearby who can babysit any time, and help with anything. He could easily move in with them for financial and childcare support. He's got a good reputation, no mental health issues, my family loves him. I'm a highschool graduate turned stay at home parent, and a college dropout. My family and I don't have a great relationship, and the sister I do get along with is four hours away and lives in a studio apartment. I have a history of psych hospitalization. I have PTSD. I delt with postpartum depression and anxiety after both pregnancies, and am on multiple meds and in weekly therapy. I have one friend. I have almost nobody who would vouch for my parenting skills, because his family would always side with him, and my only friend is a grad student who I see once a month at most. I am an impatient person, I am messy, I was out of commission for a few weeks after each baby was born and he and his mom took over childcare until I recovered physically and until I could get treatment for my postpartum anxiety. I am a good mom and I am with the kids almost all the time, and I am confident in my motherhood, but I know how I would look to anyone on the outside, especially since I know I can't prove what has happened between the two of us in the privacy of our bedroom, and the nudes incident was long enough ago that the statue of limitations has passed AND he could easily claim that either I must have been ok with it because I stayed for years after, or that he was just a dumb teen at the time.

I am just so at a loss for what to do. Things are so normal right now, and this relationship is my source of stability emotionally, as well as the source of my kids emotional and financial stability. I am happy now and everything seems to be improving, we get along better than we did when the kids were tiny, I just can't let go of the nagging feeling that something very wrong happened to me that I never got proper justice for. He apologizes constantly. He always asked for consent for everything. He soothes me when the emotions about it come up. I feel like I've genuinely forgiven him to an extent, I just don't know if that's because I should and this is something we can move past since it's been 7ish months since that incident and our relationship is really smooth, or if it's something I'm fucking up by forgiving. And if I am I have no idea how to get out, or if I would even want to make that sacrifice just to be away from the person who hurt me.

- w

Anyone who has recourses for a woman to leave her boyfriend and give her custody of her children, please REPLY to this post with resources or reblog! Tyvm.

TW: sick male behaviour (porn use, cheating, kink)

Hi, W. This is the second time I'm trying to answer you because my pc crapped out on me the first time and lost what I wrote (yes I could've screamed). Here is my second attempt.

I said previously that I understand wanting to remain anonymous, so no problem. And I also understand doubting yourself. We women are always expected to second-guess ourselves, we’re not believed, brushed off, etc, etc. Eventually we just end up gaslighting ourselves. As someone who always ignored her gut, I can confidently say—listen to yourself. Nine out of ten times my feelings were right. And I only suffered for ignoring it.

Our bodies know. When you think about this, you will know it to be true.

Having read a little bit of your post I can also confidently say; kill him. Or leave him. Previously I said I take less shit from men because I have no tolerance for them due to being gay, but genuinely… leave him. I assume things will get worse in your situation, but I’ve only read the cheating part at this point. And I say; kick his ass.

met a guy when we were teens in highschool, he was sweet, dorky, self identified as a feminist, was a good friend to me for a year or so and then asked me out.

This might be a bit of a controversial opinion, but I absolutely do not trust self-identified male feminists. When I hear a man say he’s a feminist I am immediately on my guard. You probably already know this since you’re a follower of mine, but this is a radical feminism blog, and we live in a patriarchy. Men benefit from that no matter their race, sexuality, financial status, health, and political views. And even if they disagree with most of it, there will still be subconscious things they do or think that will reflect their patriarchal views. For a man to be a true feminist ally, he will need to agree with taking a lot of power away from himself. And I don’t trust men to be alright with that.

Secondly, your romantic relationship might have developed from friendship naturally, which can happen, but I also do know a lot of men who pretend to want friendship from women, while in truth they just want sex or a romantic relationship. I don’t like that. I can’t put my finger on it exactly, but I find that sort of dishonesty a red flag.

when we were dating on and off, he had sex with a male friend of his multiple times and consistently sexted with him without my knowledge

he sent this male friend nudes of mine as part of their sexting twice that I know of

and in one situation nudes I know he asked me for the nude photos specifically for that purpose

I'm sorry, but at this stage I'm already at 'dump his ass' opinion. Cheating is wrong, as everyone with enough braincells can tell you, but sending your nudes??? That is a breach of privacy, that is a lack of respect... see, this is why I spit on male feminists. Because sending your nudes (and I apologise for coming across really blunt here) means he does not see you as a person who deserves any sort of privacy, bodily autonomy, or the right to say no. Not only that, but by sending YOUR nudes he clearly saw you as a belonging to flaunt around. And even a male feminist (if one wants to argue they exist) would abhor the mere idea of seeing a woman as an object. Girl... like, I am so sorry. He pimped you out. I'm horrified for you.

he started hooking up with a girl and told her that he was essentially just using me for sex

He was extremely angry, extremely manipulative, and I tried to guilt trip me for having even signed into his social media (something we both agreed to doing), and said the pictures that were sent were just images from online

So he cheated on you again. And then he had the audacity to lie about it? I feel the misandry in me rising to new heights right as I type this. There is this saying; when someone tells you who they are, believe them. What he said to that girl? The he used you for sex? Either he meant it, or he wanted to impress her. Men often want to to impress other men. And you know how they do that? By flaunting their wealth, their objects--aka, women. Aka, you. The anger and manipulation is just the icing on the cake.

He later ended up calling and confessing, giving multiple excuses, telling sob stories about being overcome with guilt but never feeling like it was the right time to tell me, and then telling me he understood if I left, he understood if I turned him in, he felt like he deserved to be punished

I'll be honest to you here, alright? Men are smart. I know many-a girl and woman who preaches to the choir so to speak, sending walls upon walls of texts explaining to a man or boy why they hurt her... but I'll tell you a secret.

They know.

I want everyone woman who reads this to understand this; THEY. KNOW. They know they hurt you. They know what they did was wrong. So you mentally exhausting yourself explaining it? Don't do it. Don't bother. They know.

Men are master manipulators. When anger doesn't work, they turn to sniveling. They prey on your sympathy.

he felt like he deserved to be punished

This right here? This is trying to get your sympathy, so you feel bad for him, so you comfort HIM. I can't tell you how often I see men do this, and it's all an act.

He ended up completely blocking me out for a few weeks

This right here tells me that what he said to you before, about deserving to be punished is bullshit, because if he truly felt that way he would have admitted it right then. He did it over voicecall because he knew you wouldn't have proof. He tried to manipulate you even then.

for some reason, call it love or teenage stupidity, I ended up talking to him again when he decided to stop being angry at me. Then a few months later decided to start dating him again. Looking back I really don't know why. In my mind, this incident had been a blip in what was otherwise a fantastic and steady relationship, and this didn't fit with my perception of him as a kind, funny, caring person- so instead of recognizing that he wasn't, I opted to essentially pretend it never happened.

I call this female socialisation if you don't mind. I have been in your place, many times. And I'm sure plenty of other women have too. This entire, kind funny caring etc. thing is in my opinion not true. We fabricate a reality--an alter, if you will. In truth, the man is nothing how you see him as. He portrays himself in a certain way, but it's all a lie. And I don't fault you for wanting to believe it.

things ramped up quickly, we moved in after another year together

See this here? Again, a year. After a year he asked you out. Another year, and you moved in together. Some people might call me suspicious, paranoid, or a tinfoil, but time and time again I see men settling down with a women so quick... and I am left to wonder why.

We decided to have kids. Please no judgement here. I know now that that was a stupid and immature call.

I have no judgment whatsoever for you, W. Wanting children is not stupid or immature and anyone who thinks so can fuck right off, pardon my french. I have the most respect for mothers.

while I was pregnant with our first the boundaries started to slip.

I started consenting to sex even when I didn't want to because his moods were worse on the days when we didn't,

This is the thing about boundaries with men for me. Again, of course he knew that it was wrong. But I'm probably correct when I say he didn't do it immediately, right? He did it in small steps. And he did it while you were pregnant. Some people might think, oh but why during pregnancy??

I'll tell you. Because you were carrying his kid. Men know that the moment children are in the picture, it's over. He figured he could control you again. After all, you really wanted children, didn't you? You would do everything for them, wouldn't you? Because you're a good mother. You'd never let anything happen to them.

He controls you through your babies. Now you can no longer leave. Once he thought that, his good funny kind etc loving partner fascade started to slip. He stopped pretending.

but the sex was still very unbalanced and uncomfortable, and now was expected to almost exclusively be anal or deep throating, with a lot of ass smacking and condescending language. He started using new words constantly, always wanting to try new things, and started referencing porn in jokes really often.

I got suspicious he was watching it and asked flat out. He said no but seemed off. Asked again and he admitted he was

He insisted only the most vanilla content, and for some reason fixated on insisting that it was milf content and only of women with my body type. That he was using ethical sites and it was all people who were consenting and happy to be in that business.

I could talk in depth about how porn rots the brain and how it warps people's view of women, but I think I'll just highlight this. Especially the last part about 'ethical sites' is really telling and why I don't trust male feminists.

I asked him to promise it wasn't anything I'd be uncomfortable with and I very specifically listed- potentially underage content, rape or rape play, sleep, beastiality, outright pedophilia, anything where the person was clearly drugged or drunk. He assured me he wasn't watching any of that.

I assume that was a lie.

He said he had a problem and an addiction, but that I was treating him "like a monster"

He is. Next.

He said he always wanted to tell me but was scared of being judged, and it never felt like the right time, and now I was confirming his fear of judgement for being sad/angry/uncomfortable.

Honestly, this sounds eerily similar to what he told you when he cheated. He's also guilt-tripping you, trying to make you comfort him by acting like you hurt his feelings. What a baby.

I decide since we have each other's phone pins and he's previously made it clear I can use his phone to do a brief check, keyword search terms I'd be uncomfortable with in his browser history. Immediately things come up in his recent history, but also going back as far as before I was pregnant with our first child.

I'm not copying all the searches you found, but I'm so sorry you had to find that, W. I had to take a break after reading that, it's that bad, so if you were doubting yourself... that is horrifying. And as a mother, I'm sure that must have scared you as well.

I confronted him again. He lied multiple times.

He is disgusting. Absolutely revolting. I just don't know what to say. I could just copy-paste this entire paragraph and find something to talk about in each sentence, because from top to bottom this is disturbing. Lying, again. Then his true colours show. More lying! And CNC not being 'real' is bullshit, and he probably knows it too. Especially since you talked about the industry, I presume?

He's just making excuses after excuses. I don't want to upset you, but at this point I wonder if he doesn't watch those videos imagining it's you. Also, that he is able to get off on pretend rape is horrifying as well. He gets off at imagining someone getting raped. There have been studies done, showing how men just can't distinguish CNC from the real deal anymore... that is terrifying.

He promised to go to sex addict meetings, to restart therapy, and to go to couples therapy.

All that lasted about two weeks. Then we were back to having sex, and he never ended up doing the therapy or the meetings.

And here is the thing about men; they know that once they cross your boundaries once and you stay with them, they can do it again. They cry and sob and wail at your feet, promising they'll change... but the moment they are forgiven, they just revert back.

I have seen it time and time again. They promise you everything, but they just keep it up long enough until they can start this cycle over again. You'll forgive him again. He'll revert. You'll be stuck in this never-ending loop of your heart being broken until you are numb.

I put it all out of mind and focused on the good in our relationship.

I genuinely think you do this to cope. And I don't blame you.

I am an impatient person, I am messy, I was out of commission for a few weeks after each baby was born and he and his mom took over childcare until I recovered physically and until I could get treatment for my postpartum anxiety.

I do want to stress this. I don't know what country you're from, but are you kidding??? You gave birth, woman. Cut yourself some slack for creating literal life like a god. Where I'm from it's common for a maternity nurse to take care of you AND your body after you give birth.

I am just so at a loss for what to do.

Listen to me, alright. I think you know what you need to do, or want to do, because if you didn't you wouldn't have admitted all this to me, which I think is brave and admirable.

Your children deserve a father who loves their mother and treats her right. And I'm sorry, but I don't think he does the former, and he sure as hell does not do the latter. It might not seem like this, but children are able to pick up on tension like that. Children are very smart.

Are you happy? Genuinely? And don't scoff but really look deeply within yourself and ask. Because I'm sure you're not. If you were, you would be able to put this behind you.

I just can't let go of the nagging feeling that something very wrong happened to me that I never got proper justice for.

Because it did.

He apologizes constantly. He always asked for consent for everything. He soothes me when the emotions about it come up.

He's a piece of shit and he knows it.

I just don't know if that's because I should and this is something we can move past since it's been 7ish months since that incident and our relationship is really smooth, or if it's something I'm fucking up by forgiving.

And how much more of these incidents can you take, do you think? Do you think he'll never do it again? Do you trust him to respect you now? A relationship is nothing without trust. Do you trust him?

And if I am I have no idea how to get out, or if I would even want to make that sacrifice just to be away from the person who hurt me.

You deserve to be safe. You deserve to heal. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to feel cherished. That is not a sacrifice. That is putting you first.

TL;DR

He is a rotten, disgusting, porn-sick man and you are 100% in the right for wanting to leave him. I know my answer is very long, but I wanted to reply to some points specifically since they jumped out to me. And I also want you to feel heard.

Now... you said you came to me for advice so I'll try my very best. There are a few points I want to go over.

Your family likes him, but do they know what he did? And if you told them, would they still like him?

How old are your children? You mention they're older, but that you still fear for a custody battle. If they are in their teens maybe you could wait it out till they are no longer minors, though I know this is not at all an ideal outcome.

Can you talk to him about going back to work? Since you two are low-income, he could actually be in favour. Then maybe you could secure your own income somehow? Keep a little bit secret so you have emergency money. Then you will have means to support you and your children. And now we're on that topic, how likely is it that you can go get your own degree?

I assume you're American?

Could you move closer to a support network? And if not, could you maybe try to make friends who would have your back?

Can you reach out to an ORG or something that helps women like you? Radical feminism groups in real life, etc?

I admittedly know very little about how the court favours men, and especially not if you are American or just... not Dutch. I do understand your fear about the court taking your babies away, and I do wonder whether he'll try to poison them against you.

So this is where I ask other Radfems to come in. Anyone who knows anything, has recourses or their own experience... please react to this post, send me an anon ask, or send me a DM!

I will try to scour my blog for resources and reblog this if I find anything, and please, I know I'm just a person behind a blog, but if you need a friend, W, do DM me. I might not be able to do too much, but I'll do my best and I think you could benefit from having a friendly voice.

[dadscarathon]

October 2024 Ahhhhgenda

For past Spooptober Scarathons I sort of wing it. I store up memories of movies and shows I want to watch all year, then hunt them up each day as I go. This year, I thought it would be fun to lay them out ahead of me, choosing one each calendar day. If nothing else, it will save me some time pouring through my Shudder queue!

I'll start with one that I hope will be on the list, but may not be. I'm a huge fan of the Terrifier series, and this year we get the third movie in the theaters! There's some chance I won't get to go to the theater, so we'll see, but that's my hope!

Here's the list in no particular order, with a rephrased synopsis and which service/method I intend to use to watch.

Destroy All Neighbors (Shudder) A prog rock oriented horror movie? OK!

Terrifier 3 (Theater) I haven’t read the synopsis, because trying to fathom a plot involving Art the Clown is a bit like pondering the existence of free will.

Mean Spirited (Shudder) An influencer goes on vacation and gets a demon.

YellowBrickRoad (Shudder) A town’s population disappears and “intrepid” (that’s a horror euphemism for “victim”) explorers go to find them. Seems like a horror take on OZ, which I also enjoy.

Let the Wrong One In (Shudder) A little brother turns into a vampire and the protagonist must make a choice.

Late Night with the Devil (Shudder) A rival to Carson ends up unleashing a hell on late night watchers.

The Pale Door (Shudder) Failed train robbers hide out in a ghost town and encounter some witches.

Blood Quantum (Shudder) There’s a zombie apocalypse, but for some reason the Mi'gmaq tribe are immune and must now survive.

Blood Relatives (Shudder) An old Yiddish vampire meets his possible daughter.

Hellbender (Shudder) Izzy was raised in isolation by her Mom, and once free to explore the world finds out something dark about herself.

Blumhouse’s Fantasy Island (Hulu) Didn’t read the synopsis… But I know what Fantasy Island is. And what Blumhouse is ;)

Bad Hair (Hulu) A woman gets a weave and… It attacks?

Down (Hulu) People trapped on an elevator turn out to be terrible.

Wounds (Hulu) A bartender picks up a phone someone left behind.

The Seeding (Hulu) A man lost in the wilderness seeks refuge with a stranger, then finds out she’s not there willingly or alone.

Mr. Harrigan’s Phone (Netflix) Some connections never die, apparently.

Eli (Netflix) A young boy undergoes some horrifying medical procedure

Insidious: The Red Door (Netflix) A demon haunts a family. Which, honestly… I guess “Insidious” sort of gave that away, eh?

Out of Darkness (Paramount+) 45,000 years ago some people are stranded on an island.

Jennifer’s Body (Hulu) Jennifer has some less than savory tendencies after an occult run-in. I can’t remember if I’ve ever seen this, but I wanted to watch it just in case, as there’s another movie in the same setting on this list.

Lisa Frankenstein (Amazon Prime Video) Lisa’s boyfriend is dead… But that won’t stop her.

Stopmotion (Amazon Prime Video) A stop motion animator has an experience

Arcadian (Amazon Prime Video) Nic Cage defending his family at the end of the world.

I Saw The TV Glow (MAX) Owen is introduced to scary stuff by his friends, and his reality cracks

In a Violent Nature (Amazon Prime Video) The victim of an ancient crime is resurrected to visit vengeance against trespassing teens.

A Quiet Place: Day One (Paramount+) The world goes quiet… Spooky.

X (Paramount+) Someone tries to make an adult film, and it doesn’t go well

Pearl (Shudder or Netflix) Set in 1918 a lonely farm girl goes to extremes for fame

Oddity (Shudder) A blind psychic’s twin is murdered and now she’s back to make it right…

Divinity (Shudder) Two brothers abduct a mogul and things get weird

Suitable Flesh (Hulu) A psychiatrist becomes a murderer and the story unfolds as to why that has to happen

Know a movie I have to watch that isn't on this list? Let me know in the next two days! Or, hell, any time in the next 31. Anything goes up to the last day, so I'm open to suggestions.