#a really well made and researched documentary

[iveseenitinmovies]

PLEASE watch these if you have the time i’m speechless

[calamitys-child]

Listening to a podcast discussing conspiracy theories and deconstructing the ideas behind them and it's reminded me of the coolest practical lessons in critical thinking I ever got, both in high school, both from the same teacher. One was a month long project on who killed jfk in which we could basically present any theory as long as we cited all our reasons and it got us really excited about research and interpretation, but it was the follow up that I liked best.

Our next project she brought us into class and showed us a documentary claiming the moon landing was faked. Gave us worksheets to do that sided with that stance. And at the end of class a bunch of us were like miss wait this doesn't seem right?? and she said okay, we'll discuss that next week. The next lesson, she showed us a mythbusters episode countering all the claims of the original documentary and gave us worksheets for that, and another bunch of people went wait miss you can't teach us two opposing things, which one is right? What do we put on the exam??

So she split the class in two and told us each to present a case based on each side, and to explain why our source was or wasn't the more reliable of the two. Got us to debate each other directly and use additional sources to back us up and explain why those sources were reliable and should be believed. And because they were randomly assigned there was no guarantee you'd agree with the stance you were presenting, but you had to present it like you did. At the end of the project she asked us all which stance we found more convincing and why, and the majority of us basically said "we think that the moon landing is real because most of the arguments against it seem like someone reacted to a confusing thing without testing it, but when you test it and ask the person running the test to explain the science it makes sense once you have more information. Also, one documentary was made with the help of scientists with qualifications and experience and the other was made by people who don't have that but like to write mystery books, which looks like a less reliable way to get an answer. But we still dont understand why you showed us both if one is wrong."

And she was like excellent. You've done exactly what you should do. At high school level, we as teachers are expected to filter for the reliable sources for you, so you know to repeat that to pass an exam, but if you want to be historians on your own, I won't be your teacher any more once you graduate. Lots of people have opinions and theories and research about times in history, and it's your job to learn how to look at them and decide who you want to trust. This won't be on the exam, but I need you all to know it. You all did a great job following the school's instructions to repeat information you were given, but for some of you, that information wasn't on a reliable foundation. I know you all know how to pass an exam. You're smart and you've been trained to follow these instructions. What you deserve to be taught is how to use all this once you don't have to do exams any more.

And then as a reward for us doing a good job at figuring out the value of checking your sources' sources she let us watch Bush get hit in the face with a shoe before we had to go to maths. Shoutout to you Ms Hannah you were a good'un I hope you're doing well ten years on from that class

[cinnamonest]

I'm not looking to start shit so I'm not linking it or anything, but you may have seen a recent anti-dark-content post circulating with a lot of notes making rounds in the x reader sphere and while I have nothing against people posting their feelings in their own private spaces, every time I see these kinds of posts there's a lot of misinformation that gets regurgitated in the reblogs/replies and I saw what looked like a battlezone in the replies, so.

I know posts like that can be very jarring and affects people like my readers, so to combat misinformation/shaming for anyone who saw it, I'm going to share some of my information on combatting fandom puritanism/misogyny/kinkshaming in its most common forms.

The most important fact, if you read nothing else, is this:

Most women have rape fantasies.

62% to be exact. I think the most pervasive myth on this content is that consumers are "weird" for it, when the numbers don't indicate that. You're in the majority!

The vast majority of people who have rape fantasies do not put them into practice in real life. A variety of factors can determine whether or not they do, particularly specific psychiatric disorders. (X)

To specifically address common harmful and pervasive myths:

the "go to therapy!" line

Generally any academic or professional resource will immediately tell you that consuming and engaging in "dark" fantasies is accepted and encouraged by mainstream psychiatry and part of the professional education for psychiatrists. (This also used to be pretty well-known until like the last 5 years or so, not sure why that changed.)

Here are some particularly insightful resources:

1) This article by Dr. David Wahl, in my opinion, hands-down does the best job of simply and thoroughly explaining why these fantasies occur and why couples practice CNC, as well as the fact that they are both harmless, psychologically beneficial to those with them, and not at all correlated to real-life rape.

2) Dr. Claudia Six has some of the best and most thorough material out there on the subject, specifically explaining why this is taught in mainstream academia psychology and how it is incredibly helpful to rape victims (X).

3) Lisa Diamond is a professional who focuses on this subject a lot, and was featured in the documentary "The Dilemma of Desire," in which she specifically focuses on how these fantasies are not correlated to real-life desires. (X)

4) Dr. Casey Lyle has specifically talked a lot on his socials about how fantasies, even in men/the perspective of the offender, do not correlate to actual risk of offending.

5) This article is not by a professional, but from the perspective of a survivor discussing how it is beneficial to survivors.

the "why would you want that?" line

The idea that fictional tastes = what you want to happen to you in real life is actually of misogynistic origin. I don't want to seek out or add links on this one, but if you're really curious, you can research about how the idea that "women read rape fiction, that means they secretly want rape!" was originally a classic "red pill"/MGTOW/4chan talking point that made its way into mainstream dialogue and thus the public mind in the last 15 years or so due to the incel epidemic popularizing those communities.

the "it's only valid for survivors then!" line

On one hand, yes it's very important to acknowledge that trauma victims use it to cope, however I feel that over-emphasizing that gives the impression that non-victims should be excluded from consumption of dark content, so to clarify, it's a very valid means for all women. Many women who have not personally experienced rape still fantasize about it, and that's fine.

The full explanation as to why this is true for many of them would be lengthy (and addressed in the aforementioned Dilemma of Desire documentary), but in the simplest terms, nonconsensual sex is the only context in which patriarchal society permits women to have sex at all without feeling guilt. For many women, particularly those in more heavily misogynistic or religious cultures, these fantasies are appealing because the idea of consensual sex may give them feelings of shame, guilt, "sin," etc. These fantasies allow them to experience the feeling of being desired without guilt of participation.

No society on earth is free of the psychological grip that cultural misogyny has on women, and shaming women for adapting to the conditions they are forced to exist under is as harmful as the misogyny that causes it itself.

ALL women experience a form of psychological trauma inherent to female childhood and female adolescence in a patriarchal world, and that is just as valid as coping with individual traumatic events.

Good resources on the subject of why women have these fantasies and how they are helpful in general:

(X) (X)

The "what you consume will make you do it in real life!" myth

Although the resources above already address this, it's important to establish why this myth is so prevalent and what its origins are.

The idea that consuming media with dark themes leads to or indicates desires to replicate those acts is a residual element of two major events:

1) Puritan revival culture, popularized in the US and UK in the 90s and 2000s (also known as "Satanic Panic"). A major facet of this movement was TV megachurch preachers making money off of exploiting well-meaning but paranoid parents into believing that your child playing Dungeons and Dragons or Pokemon would make them future serial killers and lure them into satanic cults. (X)

2) at the tail end of this, it was cemented in the public mind as a cultural ripple aftershock of the Columbine shooting, where this sentiment became popularized as the general public blamed violent video games like Doom and "dark" music like Marilyn Manson (whose life was temporarily completely upended by the events and took him years to recover/be safe from) for the 1999 shooting. This event had MASSIVE permanent and global effects in all sorts of ways that the public often underestimates the sheer scope of, notably that it solidified, prolonged, and, in the minds of many, "proved" the paranoias of the preexisting Satanic Panic. (X) This established a precedent, leading to virtually any major horrible event being blamed on the perpetrator's media consumption, including murder and sex crimes.

What this myth ignores in the cases it references (the slenderman stabbings, columbine, sasebo slashing, batman shooting, etc) is two crucial facts: that hundreds of millions of people consume the same media with no negative effects (helpful effects even), and that in every single case cited as "evidence" to the claim, the perpetrator had a preexisting psychiatric condition correlated to acts of violence (which usually went ignored, downplayed and even accelerated/worsened by those around them rather than the help they needed).

Sorry for the wall of text, but I feel an ethical obligation to combat this kind of misinformation, and I hope these resources are helpful for those who may be negatively affected by common misunderstandings.

You are not abnormal or wrong for the fictional content you consume or the fantasies you have!

[foodfightnovelization]

ROTTEN: Behind The Foodfight

Holy chips! It's an exciting time to be a Foodfight! fan, because ROTTEN: Behind The Foodfight is finally out! This really is THE definitive documentary on the insanity behind the movie, and it finally answers the question of just what was going on behind the scenes during production. Since I helped out with research (and I even get a short line of dialogue at 45:19) I've already seen everything that was shown off, but had to keep quiet until all the interviews were conducted and the documentary was finished. But now it's out and everything has been made public, the cat's out of the bag (the Fat Cat Burglar?) and I can talk about all the production material that's been shared.

Before I get into any of that though, I'd highly recommend you watch the documentary for yourself. It's insanely well researched and put together, and having worked together with Ziggy Cashmere (the documentary's creator) I know how hard he dedicated himself towards making this all possible. If it weren't for him, the most interesting Foodfight! discovery would've been finding the novelization, and we would have never gotten any real insight into how this movie came to be. It's also a documentary that really speaks for itself- I don't want to say too much about what it reveals since it's all expressed far better through its narrative and the interviews with people who actually worked on the project. My favorite is the interview with texture artist Mona Weiss- she tells such horrifying stories about how she was treated by Larry and other crewmembers, yet does it all with a sense of humor that makes it clear she's enjoying getting to talk about her crazy experiences. It's clear Foodfight! was an unmitigated disaster from start to finish, and there's nobody to blame for that but Larry Kasanoff himself. The movie was rotten from the top down and despite the countless talented animators and artists working on it, nothing could fix the fact that it was fundamentally mismanaged in the worst way possible. I think the quote from producer George Johnsen summarizes it best: "Foodfight! was a good idea that unfortunately lost its way during production. The technology, the art, and the direction were not in sync. Many very talented people gave their all to make the picture, but more understanding of process from the top was needed for it to succeed."

But if you saw the documentary, you already know all that, right? So instead, let's talk about the behind-the-scenes material that's finally been shared! You can find everything I'll talking about HERE on archive.org-

It's worth following the link and checking it out for yourself- there's so much it'd impossible to discuss everything. Artwork, storyboards, bloopers, models, a nude render of Lady X, an interview with Larry Kasanoff, the list goes on and it's still being updated! Despite the documentary already being out, people who worked on the movie are continuing to share new material! It's pretty incredible- for the past year I've ran this blog all I've really had to discuss are two tie-in books, and now there's so much Foodfight! material I can't even keep up with it.

I mean LOOK at all this, isn't it fantastic? The character art by Jim George showing off just how much better these designs originally were, the countless environments showing off just how stunning Marketropolis could've looked as well as the strength of the core idea "what if a supermarket came to life at night", and insanely detailed storyboards for a 7-minute pitch reel that was used to sell the movie to investors. Normally, I'd be ALL OVER this because it's all just incredible, but there's something far, FAR more fascinating than any of it.

There are even multiple drafts of the script (one from 2005 and one from 2007 respectively) and normally I'd be insanely fascinated by those too, making extremely detailed posts explaining the differences between the drafts and how they compare to the novelization, but there's something else that was found that blows ALL of this out of the water and is easily one of the most monumental lost media discoveries of ALL TIME.

That's right, a rough cut of the ENTIRE movie from 2005 has been found, containing nearly ALL the completed animation from earlier on in production. I mean, that's mindblowing right? We first got sent this around a month ago, a little while before the documentary came out, and I literally stopped everything I was doing at work to just sit and watch this. This is the closest we're ever going to get to the "original" version of Foodfight! after all- only 7 minutes of footage was ever actually made before they switched to mocap, made solely for the aforementioned pitch reel, and this workprint contains practically all of it! On top of that there are some great storyboards in here, as well as some truly hilarious ones cobbled together from 3D renders, and the plot is far better than what we ended up with, a lot of the more inappropriate jokes being absent. This rough cut is actually pretty similar to the novelization in that regard, and it also contains scenes that we'd previously only read about in there.

For example, in the novelization there's a snowmobile chase through the mountains, with Brand X soldiers on snowmobiles and a heavy avalanche close behind. This scene was completely left out of the movie itself, but in this workprint it's here! ALL the previously novelization-exclusive scenes are included, and this rough cut is seemingly based on an even earlier draft of the script than that- here Brand X are still defeated by a flood, whereas by the time of the novelization it'd been changed to a lightning storm. There are SO many exciting differences in this workprint, the snippets of original animation we get to see are SO good, and it's SO much better than the movie itself that I think it by far deserves the crown as the DEFINITIVE version of Foodfight! There's so much in it I want to discuss, that there's no way I can fit it all into this one post...so stay tuned, because in the next few days I'll be doing a FULL analysis of the 2005 workprint, pointing out all the extra brand mascots not in the finished film, and generally just gushing about how amazing it is.

I mean, this is it. Just take it all in for a second- the original footage was considered lost media for over a decade, and now it's practically been found in its entirety, embedded in an early cut of the whole movie...isn't that just phenomenal? All the mysteries have been unraveled, all the questions have been answered, and now we can relax, take a deep breath, and watch Foodfight!...the REAL Foodfight! Make sure to enjoy it, and join me next time for my analysis!

[jellyvibes710]

I dunno what to really say here :p

Here be the character sheets I made for this series, enjoy!

PARASITE COMIC HERE (a fan comic for @abbeyofcyn kraang infection au read it if you haven't yet! :D)

This is all their outfits throughout the series, it's a short series so there isn't a whole lot haha

Unfortunately for Raphs and Donnies gif I had to do a worse quality because the original gifs were too big and I can only add one video, may their high resolution rest in peace

Splinter, April, Casey JR [UNAVAILABLE] soon

Kraang infected characters [UNAVAILABLE]

[CLASSIFIED INFORMATION]

Himato Leonardo, Age 18

××-××-××

Self modified shell and workings of the parasite may be too gruesome for certain groups, withholding highly sensitive documentary will result in the reader being rendered MISSING due to [REDACTED]

Upon contact of receiving the parasite the host [Leonardo] began experiencing pain beyond reasoning, the speed of the parasite reaching the hosts mind was remarkable. Taking only approximately 3.6 seconds for the parasite to reach the Frontal Lobes as well as parts of the Occipital Lobe, Parietal Lobe and Limbic System resulting in host going Farel, attacking any other potential hosts within range. Although, upon sudden high temperatures from the family ninpo due to [REDACTED] the parasite noticeably retreated to the hosts shell by accessing the cerebellum then traveling down through the brainstem and spinal cord.

Compared to previous host [Donatello], access to the current host[yours truly] sparked an interesting difference. While the previous host acted [REDACTED], the parasite acts more violently to its current host, spreading across the inside of the shell and swelling, applying roughly 650-660 pounds of force to the shell. Surpassing the pressure it'd take to crush a regular turtle shell, hypothesis states due to mutation our shells are more flexible than average, allowing us to twist and bend in ways that'd be unnatural/harmful to our unmutated counterparts, but causing extreme pain and discomfort for the host, applying pressure not only to the shell but to the internal organs as well. Putting the subject life at high risk, if not acted upon [REDACTED] resulting in life threatening damage and spread of the parasite to any nearby victims.

Immediate surgical action required.

_______________________________________

My additional research collected continues to impress my original beliefs.

With new additions added, the host has not only managed to contain the parasite but even weaponize it.

Self made cracks aided in the surgical process as well as preventing the parasite from destroying the shell worse than it has, leaving a peace of the shell in its original position assistance in leveraging the parasite, it also assist in the closing mechanisms added to the inners of the shell. Additional spinal support was added to prevent risks from having far more flexibly than the current host previously was capable of, as well as aiding in preventing the parasite from spreading and causing more problems with the use of ninpo running through the mechanical parts.

It hurts.

Due to the tech needing a constant flow of ninpo to prevent system failure and allowing the parasite to spread, ninpo will be very limited if in events of a battle. Unfortunately, constant access to regular temperatures leads to flu like symptoms, allowing the parasite to thrive and spread despite the ninpo mechanisms preventing it from swelling, acting more as damage control. The hosts shell is too damaged to be submerged, milkshakes and ice will have to assist in the prevention of spread.

Along in aiding with parasite control, the tech attached to the spine (somehow separated from the shell and is confined within the flesh of the parasite, as if it was carefully peeled off. Remarkably no damage found to anything vital.) Have flexible material that wrap around the bone and were very careful surgically attached to the spinal nerve, spinal cord and vertebrae to act as support and to prevent accidental damage, Acting as a theoretical shell in the meantime.

Flexible but strong material was bolted in along the inside of the host shell, acting as some kind of prosthetic allowing the host to open and close the shell at will. Still causes discomfort unfortunately.

More in depth description shall be provided [REDACTED]

Overall this surgery took approximately 12 hours. Rest is required.

_______________________________________

The log has ended, but pieces can still be found from here out.

Perhaps then you may have the full story

As much as I wanna go more into depth with these details unfortunately it'll risk spoiling parts of the story I'm really looking forward to working on

Till next time! ^-^=

(Sorry if something doesn't make sense or I spelled something wrong, I decided to write this while I'm pretty much half asleep ☠️)

[lackadaisycats]

I tried to answer this succinctly, but it turned into an essay. (Sorry.)

The Princess and the Frog was not accurate, strictly speaking, but dinging it for that would be like criticizing the Lion King for not being a realistic wildlife documentary. Accuracy wasn't really the point. Given the fantastical elements and fictional nations like “Maldonia”, I suppose we're meant to understand this as a bit removed from the real New Orleans. It's more a a jazz-flavored fairy tale than a historical fiction.

But for discussion's sake....

Is it fashion-accurate to its 1926 timeframe? Ehhh, sort of. It pays homage to 20s fashion trends with cloche hats, furs and feathery headpieces, but without fully committing to it. The waistline on almost all of Tiana's clothing is too high for the 20s, and the the shapes of her fancier costumes take a lot of liberties, or deviate wildly from the style of the period.

In the 20s, dresses (including workaday stuff) tended to have a straight up-and-down shape to it - kind of a low-waisted rectangle that de-emphasized curves instead of highlighting them. There are valid reasons to play fast and loose with that, though (something I’m definitely guilty of as well). One of those reasons is communication. 

For instance, speculatively, the filmmakers wrote Tiana as a hard-working waitress and wanted her to look the part, so they made the choice to clothe her in something familiar - that gingham dress of mid-century shape that we broadly associate with diner waitresses. Actual waitress uniforms of the 20s had a fair bit of overlap with maid uniforms at the time too, and I can see why they wouldn't want to risk the confusion. It's more important to communicate clearly with the larger audience than to appease a small faction of fashion nerds who'd notice or care about the precision.

I don't think it's a case of the designers failing to do their research - I'm sure they had piles of references, and maybe even consultants - but they also had to have priorities.

With her hat and coat on, she looks a lot more 1920s-shaped.

Pretty consistently, the indication of the characteristic 1920s drop waist is there, but the approach otherwise ignores the 20s silhouette. The clothes hug the body too much. This may be about appealing to a 2000s audience, visually speaking, but also could be an animation thing. Maybe both. For practical reasons, clothes in 2d animation are usually more a sort of second skin than something that wears or behaves like realistic fabric.

These are not in the 1920s ballpark at all. Tiana's blue gown looks like your basic Disney brand invention. Strapless things would have been extremely unusual and the overall shape is far out of step. Excusable, I guess, because it's a costume in context. Charlotte looks like she’s heading for a mimosa brunch in a modern maxi dress.

Charlotte's princess dress did seem to be calling back to the ultra-wide pannier side hoops of the 18th century - something that made a reappearance for part of the 20s, albeit in much milder form called robe de style. I'm not sure if the filmmakers were alluding to that at all, really, but either way, her dress is hilarious.

They only went about halfway with the cloche hats. The 1920s cloche really encapsulated the cranium, almost entirely covered bobbed hair, and obscured much of the face from certain angles, so it's easy to see why they've been somewhat reined in for the film. Still, it ends up looking more 1930s, where the hats started to recede away from the face, evolving in the direction of the pillbox.

Similarly, Tiana's hair is not very reminiscent of the bobbed, close-to-the-cranium style of the period, but I think that could legitimately be written off as characterization. She's not at all the type of person who'd fuss about going à la mode. Not everyone bobbed and finger-waved their hair.

The clothes Prince Naveen is introduced in are very 1920s collegiate in spirit - the wide-leg oxford bags, the sleeveless pullover sweater, the flat cap, and high, stiff collar. The ukulele and banjolele were pretty trendy instruments at the time too.

Definitely some Josephine Baker vibes here. Also, the look of this whole fantasy sequence was reportedly inspired by the works of Aaron Douglas, a luminary painter of the Harlem Renaissance known for his depictions of the lives of African-Americans. (The mural is in Topeka, Kansas.)

They pretty much nailed the Art Deco. It's gorgeous. Looks somewhat inspired by the interiors of some of the Ralph Walker-designed NYC architecture, plus some French Quarter balcony flair for the final manifestation of Tiana's Place. Her dress here does resemble some gauzy mid-1920s looks, too.

------------------------------------------------

Culturally speaking...

New Orleans is an unusual place. Because some of the colonial Spanish and French laws and conventions that New Orleans evolved under persisted even after its inception into the United States; because it was such a heterogeneous hub of indigenous and immigrant peoples; and because it had a considerable population of free people of color (mostly Creole), it did not function quite like the rest of the South leading up to the Civil War, nor for a while after. Its particular coalescence of cultures made it its own unique sort of culture within the country, within the region, within the state of Louisiana even. By the early 20th century, though, regardless of the not-very-binary nature of New Orleans, Jim Crow laws were enforcing a literal black-and-white distinction, and not an evenhanded one, by far. In that aspect, the city had begun to resemble the rest of the South.

The film nods at the wealth disparity, but goes on to paint a pretty rosy picture of race and class relations at the time. Still it's not unbelievable that some people were exceptions to the rules. You could probably find a few compartments of old New Orleans society that resisted segregation or certain prejudicial norms, preferring to do things their own way. That aside, the film wasn't trying to confront these topics. Not every piece of media should have to. Sometimes breaking away from miserable period piece stereotypes is refreshing. I'm not sure it could have handled that meaningfully given the running time, narrow story focus, and intended audience, anyhow. (But you could perhaps also make a case that family films habitually underestimate younger audiences in this way.)

------------------------------------------------

Raymond the firefly I guess is the film's Cajun representation. There's not much to say about it, except perhaps to note that Evangeline is a reference to the heroine of a Longfellow poem of the same name. The poem is an epic romance set during the expulsion of the Acadians from the eastern provinces of Canada and the northernmost reaches of the American colonies (now Maine) by the British in the mid-1700s. Many exiled Acadians gradually migrated south to francophone-friendly Louisiana, settling into the prairies and bayous, where 'Acadian' truncated into the pronunciation 'Cajun'. Evangeline - who is only finally reunited with her love when he’s on his deathbed - has become an emblem of the heartbreak, separation and faithful hope of that cultural history, and there are parishes, statues and other landmarks named after the her throughout Louisiana.

------------------------------------------------

Voodoo does have a very historical presence in New Orleans, having arrived both directly from West Africa and by way of the Haitian diaspora (where it would more properly be called Vodou). While I don't think Disney's treatment of it was especially sensitive or serious, it also wasn't the grotesquely off-base sort of thing that media of the past has been known to do. It was largely whittled down to a magical plot component, but it wasn't so fully repurposed that it didn't resemble Voodoo at all either - and that's mostly owing to the characters, because it does appear the writers pulled from history there.

It’s apparently widely held that Dr. Facilier is a Baron Samedi caricature - and likely that's true, in part - but I have the impression he's also influenced by Doctor John. Not the 20th century funk musician, but the antebellum “Voodoo King” of New Orleans. Doctor John (also called Bayou John, Jean La Ficelle, and other aliases) claimed to be a Senegalese prince. He became well known as a potion man and romance-focused prognosticator to people from all corners of society. Though highly celebrated and financially successful at his peak, he seems ultimately remembered as an exploitative villain.

To my recollection, the film sort of gingerly avoids referring to Facilier as a Voodoo practitioner directly (I think he's more generically called a witch doctor in the script?) but it does seem to imply his 'friends on the other side' are a consortium of loa. It's mostly abbreviated into nebulously evil-seeming special FX, glazing over any specificity or dimensionality, but it does also loop back around as a vehicle of moral justice. Loa are all very individualistic and multi-faceted, but they do have reciprocal rules for asking favors of them.

There's also the benevolent counterpart in Mama Odie's character. Her wearing ritual whites has a definite basis in Voodoo/Vodou practice, and her depiction as a fairy godmother-like figure isn't entirely out of step with how a mambo may have been perceived...in a very general sense. They were/are ceremonial leaders and community bastions who people would seek out for help, advice and spiritual guidance. More than just emanating matronly good vibes, though, some have wielded considerable political and economic power.

(Just my opinions here. I've done a lot of reading on the subject for research but I'm no authority with any special insider understanding of Voodoo, and I really shouldn't be relied upon as an arbiter of who has or hasn't done it justice in fiction.)

------------------------------------------------

In summary--

Culturally, I think the film is respectably informed but paints a superficially genteel picture. The set pieces are gorgeous, but the story mostly delivers a sort of veneer of New Orleanishness. And as for fashion, well, it’s the 1920s run through a Disney filter. It’s very pretty, but it’s only as proximally accurate as seemed practical.

I don’t know that any of that really matters so much as whether or not it achieved what it intended, though. As a charming yarn and as a tribute to New Orleans and the Jazz age, I think it’s mostly successful. It’s also really beautifully animated!

[fredwkong]

Alphaworld File 1: Oral History

The universe is multifarious, constantly diverging as new choices are made. Spinning away through time, these alternate realities become locked away from our own, so we can never know exactly what would have happened if a single choice was made differently.

Except, sometimes, two of those worlds, careening through the upper dimensions, happen to converge. As they slide past each other, they may line up just so, each leaving behind fragments as they continue their journey into their divergent futures. You’ve never heard of this, because the remnants, mostly data, are swiftly collected by various government agencies and collected into reports on the intercepted reality.

This report collects various scientific articles, personal journals, news reels, and even a documentary series from one such reality, codenamed Alphaworld. In this world, gay men have not only become the norm, but have seemingly replaced all other people. In this world, society is stratified into an apparently biological hierarchy of homosexual castes, based on men’s physical characteristics and psychologies. Upon finishing the following fragment from a peer-reviewed article that was a trace recovered from Alphaworld, please select the next fragment you would like to consume.

X

An Oral History of the Creation and Initial Spread of the Alpha Phenomenon, by Alpha Dr. Jose Martinez

Until recently, it was not known what sparked the spread of the Alpha Phenomenon which has wholly remade the world in recent years. This was until Alpha Joshua Dearfoot, who resides with his Betas in rural ex-Ontario, stated during a livestream on OnlyFans that he is the original Alpha.

Alpha Dearfoot does not interact with Betas from outside his harem unless they renounce their current Alpha. As this research team contains no unbonded Betas—Alpha Dr. Martinez says we can’t spend too much time with non-harem Betas—we investigated among those close to Alpha Dearfoot, conducting interviews and surveying in the local area to discover as much as we could.

Joshua, as he was known before the emergence of the Alpha Phenomenon, was a PhD candidate in nanotechnology, with a secondary focus in physiology. Photographs kept by his father (Beta to Alpha Sean Barehill) reveal that through his youth and young adulthood Joshua was physically unimpressive, with a physique not even reaching the base level expected of a Beta.

According to a classmate of Joshua’s from university (Beta to Alpha Liam Oliver), Joshua was studious but insecure: “I mean, I used to push him around all the time for being a fa— gay kid. Gay and a nerd? In the Old World, that was, like, the worst thing.” When asked about whether he has properly apologised, the Beta said, in a rapturous voice, “Oh, yeah, Alpha Dearfoot was my first. He disciplined me so well I could barely walk, I came like four times. Then he told me to come join Alpha Liam’s harem. I mean, he wasn’t Alpha Liam then, I was one of the first guys to go full Beta on campus.”

It appears that Alpha Dearfoot had a difficult youth, growing up unable to meet certain Old World expectations of manhood. The masculine stereotypes of Native Americans also seem to have weighed on him, as he was entirely unable to meet them. As his father told us, “Joshua was a sweet kid, but he got bullied for being too short and scrawny, not matching the image of an “Indian” in all these bigoted kids’ heads. He was obsessed with growing bigger, which is why he went into physio.” Remember, in some communities it is normal for a Beta father to continue to refer to his Alpha son by his first name.

According to Sigma Harrison White, a former lab partner of Dearfoot’s who fucked us on his lawn in exchange for this interview, Joshua was obsessed with creating some way to become more manly. “He spent some really long evenings in the lab,” said Harrison while one of us squealed in the grass beneath him. “One morning he came out with this manic grin on his face, said that he’d finally done it, and ran off. Two weeks later, he came back a full Alpha.” At this point, Harrison’s pace slowed down as he became contemplative. “It was only after he started hooking up with all the queer guys on campus that we started becoming Alphas and Sigmas and stuff, too.”

Did Alpha Dearfoot intend for the Alpha Phenomenon to be infectious? A Beta from his harem claims not. “He got home from school one morning all excited about some project he’d finished,” the Beta told us—it seems that he and Alpha Dearfoot were childhood friends. “The next day, he seemed a little different, a little more muscular, more assertive. He seemed really satisfied for about a week, then he got scared. He just kept getting bigger. The day he got taller than me and nearly broke a bar at the gym doing deadlifts, I started feeling the Beta change.

“I went to him and started telling him about my muscle gains and all the weird thoughts and sensations I was experiencing, and he got really scared,” the Beta continued, his eyes distant. “I started to comfort him, and that was when we felt the bond form. It felt so right for him to be my first, to finger me open and fill me with his still-growing dick.”

While we pressed for more details about what may have been the first Alpha/Beta bond in history, the Beta refused to disclose more information, claiming that it was private to him and his Alpha. For the reader’s imagination, see Figure A to find a picture of Alpha Dearfoot from his Instagram profile.

Alpha Dearfoot appears to have intended to create a nanomachine-based masculinity booster, and the transmissibility of the Alpha Phenomenon, as well as the behavioural and sexual changes it induces, were unintended side effects, perhaps introduced in the particles’ replication process. The effects of the Alpha Phenomenon on aging and physical fitness may also be unexpected consequences of Alpha Dearfoot's programming efforts.

According to Alpha Young Baek Hyeon, who lives in the former New York area with a mixed harem, he and Alpha Dearfoot attempted to “date,” an outmoded practice common in the Old World, during the early weeks of the Alpha Phenomenon’s spread. “Alpha DeWayne and I work well together,” Alpha Young told us by video call, “but we’re both pretty chill even since we changed. Alpha Dearfoot and I couldn’t even stand to be in the same room once I had transformed. He’s one of the most territorial Alphas I’ve ever met, he can barely stand to have another Alpha within a mile of him.” As Alpha Young spoke, we watched a well-trained Beta enter the room with a plate of apple slices and present them to his Alpha.

“He was really torn up about it, too. Even though we couldn’t stop yelling at each other in person or over the phone, he left me a ton of really sweet voice messages about how much he’d liked me before we became Alphas.” Alpha Young took a bite of apple and ruffled his Beta’s hair, causing all of us to shudder with phantom pleasure at the affection. With a contemplative expression, Alpha Young said, “No, I don’t think he meant for any of this to happen.”

While this study has yielded plenty of useful biographical information about the man apparently responsible for the Alpha Phenomenon that changed the world, we appear no closer to understanding the precise mechanism of that change. With better access to the programming of the nanomachines, perhaps it would be possible to reduce the natural aggressiveness of the Alphas, allowing Alphas like Dearfoot to return to their studies or jobs if they so wish. In the following section, we will propose potential opportunities for further research in the effort to isolate the Alpha Phenomenon.

Or vote on Strawpoll here: https://strawpoll.com/wby5A0vw8yA

This series is my way of celebrating reaching 2000 followers! I hope you enjoy this glimpse into Alphaworld and vote on what file you would like to see next. There is no strict update schedule, so you good boys better be on the lookout for a new chapter you can vote on ;)

[okanra]

FEW FUN BEHIND-THE-SCENES STUFF I DID FOR “THE UNSPOKEN” WEBCOMIC SERIES (still ongoing, of course)

So I’m migrating some of the (public version of) pre-production stuff I did in 2021-2023 for THE UNSPOKEN webcomic (back when it still had the old name “Trunks and Goten in High School AU”) here, since X/Twitter apparently annihilated the old Moment feature for real. These are mostly research stuff, some warm up doodles and inspiring sountrack playlists I did before a chapter or a story got made. I usually do a lot of research offline before working on any creative project, that’s why sometimes it feels like there’s so many information gets jammed into one chapter: it was mostly to make do for all the time that I didn’t get to, or wouldn’t be able to work on the comics.

Will add in the chapters along side the information paper for clearer understanding ✌️

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1. The warm-up expression practice sheet (or doodles, in my case) of Son Goten and Trunks in my webcomic series (late 2022 or early 2023):

Since the idea in mind for these two in the webcomic was to be more “mature, human-like” than the original manga version to fit with the narrative I want to tell and aim at the older demographic, practices are needed :p

2. The Martial Arts techniques research information papers - Chapter 2 and 3 aka “The Spar” 1 & “The Spar” 2 (2021-2022):

A. Goten’s techniques:

B. Trunks’s techniques:

This research about martial arts techniques was actually very fun to do due to martial arts and cultural aspects are being two of the things I enjoy the most in life. That’s probably parts of the reasons why I went back to Dragon Ball in 2020: motorbikes, martial arts and mixed races culture.

Back then I did plan on sharing my research to everyone in the form of little fun art lessons, so there were interesting tweets like this or this. Later I decided to share this somewhere else more private (like my Patreon community) since I realized pre-production researches (or something akin to visual developments) are not that well-liked for most online viewers even though it’s a very much needed process in a creative project 🤔

This martial art concept is one of the actual main themes throughout the whole webcomic series, not really the (super duper gay) b-romance relationship between Son Goten and Trunks, yes I’m very sorryyyyyyy I like them too but I like worldbuilding more lmaoooo :p

3. The brief character design sheet and Chinese-influenced culture research information papers - Chapter 4: “The Iron Woman” and Chapter 5: “Her Resolution, His Origin” (mid-2022 until now and will be continued):

A. Character Design brief sheet:

B. Culture research stuff:

The hilarious thing about researching for these chapters are: Back when “The Iron Woman” was being made, the research limited at reading articles and some books about Chinese cultures, and watching documentaries on Youtube. But when “Her Resolution, His Origin” was being made, the research tuned into a real life trip to China, to take real life reference photos and listening to real legends and stories.

This research for “Her Resolution, His Origin” will be posted to Patreon later, of course ✌️

4. The Original Comic introduction and comeback announcements in mid-2022:

I must have eaten some edibles while drawing this because the boys look so good here. Goten looks so good, I even made him the profile picture for my Patreon account lmao.

5. Soundtrack playlists for inspirations (2021 - now): always the cherry on top. I listen to these playlists everytime I work on the series.

A. Duo playlist for chapters featuring both main characters: link

B. Character playlist for chapters focusing on single character, or anything related to that character: link

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All in all, posts like this are for people who like to see what’s beneath the surface when working on a creative project. I completely guarantee you, what you’ve seen on this blog are just the tips of the ice berg 🤫

Def not a PR, but my Patreon has lots of this lmao. Half joking half serious, there’s even a “non-posted” comic up there too and many other things. I’m just stating facts.

That aside, I’m just really happy to be able to work on this webcomic. THE UNSPOKEN webcomic series has always been a long-term indie project, not a daily content so I hope the readers who like and follow this series would stay tuned for more ✌️

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For easier reading, you can either follow the links that are included above, or just read this Tapas updated version.

[qsycomplainsalot]

Re: Pervertin or how German Supersoldiers High on Crack travelled through Space and Time Buy my Book

I came across a post on the bird site yesterday calling into attention the use of pervitin, more or less adderall, among German troops during WW2. For context pervitin tablets were indeed issued to a lot of military personnel back in those days, specifically to aircraft pilot and sometimes tank crews on long missions. The drug as some of you may have heard keeps you awake and alert, along with a slew of side effects and a non negligible chance of addiction. In a discussion that brought to view just how willing people are to buy into Nazi propaganda in the year of our f*cking lord 2023, I pointed out a few things, uphill and having to indulge a lot of sidetracking. The use of pervitin has always been a little overstated ever since it came to the internet's attention, and I certainly would never call it a key component of the Blitzkrieg when, in the theaters of war where actual Blitzkrieg was employed, its success was more due to a combination of innovative doctrines, intact fuel supplies and a big fat helping of dumb luck. It was a bold move highly relying on capturing enemy fuel depots with fast, surprise deep strikes supported by a lot of armored and air forces, and it was only sustainable in neighboring, industrialized countries. One can argue if the USSR was industrialized at the time, but it stopped mattering when the Russians removed their entire industry from the West to beyond the Ural mountains. The Blitz stalled there.

"But if it didn't work, then why did the Nazis do it so often ?" Well the answer to that is twofold. The first, longer answer is that Nazis were a bunch of f*cking morons. Maybe not one by one, but as a government in charge of military procurement, they were one bunch of goofy motherf*ckers. Gaggle of functional shit-for-brains really. The Nazis gave every one of their tanks in the middle of the war two coats of anti-magnetic paint, which took almost a full day to cure, despite being the only major nation to use magnetic antitank mines. The Nazis kept using slave labor drawn from their prisoners of war, including in the manufacturing of their overengineered armored vehicles, resulting in poor quality products or, you know, a few rivets in your magnificent Tiger tank being replaced by a cigarette butt. The Nazis spent more than half the cost of a strategic bomber on every V2 rocket, not including design costs, for less than half the payload. It ended up killing more Germans and slave workers than British people in London, for literally no strategic or tactical result with 0.4 person killed per every rocket. The second, shorter answer is that pervitin was not used that much. A lot of the arguments trying to boost its importance come from a single book, "Blitzed" by Norman Ohler, now available in twenty languages apparently, where grand claims are made by a historian who was probably more than a little tired of seeing Buzzfeed rack in the big bucks instead of him.

End note; I was called out by a bird siter after the conversation that inspired this post for even beginning to fact-check this, which they considered, and I quote, "fangirling over nazi stats". I cannot stress this enough, learning the 'bad' parts of history does not make you bad person, it is how you interact with the resulting knowledge. Unlike what they implied, I had to look for those supporting evidence. I had a hunch that such a grabbing headline about super-drugs would be fake, I knew offhand that V2 rockets killed more blues than reds, but when I had to research all that jazz about Nazis and their superweapons it was to dunk on them, not make another History Channel documentary about a time-travelling bell. Stay critical, fascists can eat shit.

[lokisprettygirl]

Utopia (Modern! Daemon Targaryen x female reader) (Non Canon AU) (18+)

Read chapter 2 here // Series Masterlist

Chapter 3

Summary: Survival on your own becomes difficult but at least you're not alone.

Warning: 18+ death and destruction that comes from a ship wreckage, smut, sex, menstrual sex, unprotected sex. Some inconsistency with ship sinking, i researched as much as I could

Three weeks, it has been three weeks since you had been stranded on that forsaken island with Daemon and no rescue has come looking for you two. You were marking everyday by scribbling the numbers with stones. Each morning you awoke with a deep sense of dread, hoping with all your heart that this nightmare would finally end.

Looking after yourselves on the island wasn't easy, as you were constantly fighting for survival. Both of you were barely surviving on eating fruits in the day and occasional fish that Daemon managed to catch, which was never enough to fulfill your hunger for the night.

Things seemed to just get worse everyday. On the 4th day Daemon had suggested that you two needed to take care of personal hygiene, like brushing your teeths and bathing. This wasn't the type of conversation you wanted to have with the guy you had a huge crush on but you were both emptying your bowels in the woods while the other one remained a few feet away to safeguard so the shame was the first thing to get swept up in the waters.

Your hair was starting to get matted and you feared you'd have to cut it all off if by chance you'd end up getting rescued. If you'd end up getting rescued.

However you had watched a nature documentary where the man suggested using mango tree barks as dental twigs, sure it didn't do the best job but it did something to keep your teeth and mouths clean.

All of those things were terrifying of course but none of it seemed as horrible as what you were about to go through soon. You were close to the beginning of your menstrual cycle, it was one less thing Daemon didn't have to worry about you thought.

Within the first two days on the island, you and Daemon made the difficult decision to remove the clothing of the people who had perished, it felt disrespectful sure but you both needed it, you washed those clothes in the sea water to get rid of blood as much as you could and you were saving some of it for the hell week, bleeding wasn't your concern though, it was the deathly cramps you were about to suffer.

“Here..eat it” Daemon handed you a banana before he sat down next to you. They had ripened. You looked at the blue shirt he was wearing today as it was from one of the bodies. His hair was all messed up, same as yours, and he had grown a thick stubble which actually made him look really rugged. As your eyes met, you realized that despite the grueling circumstances, you had somehow maintained a sense of normalcy, a familiar comfort in the midst of chaos.

On the 12th day he got one of his migraine attacks and there was nothing to soothe him from the pain and sensory overload.

Well that was one thing you thought you didn't have to worry about.

At night while he was wailing in pain you took him near the sea and soaked a piece of cloth in the cold water to put it over his head order to bring him some relief, then you caressed his head until he had fallen asleep, once he was asleep you stepped a few feet away from him but stayed close enough where you could see him. And then you cried, you cried and cried until you weren't able to cry anymore, you were beginning to lose hope everyday, the tears were streaming down your face as you acknowledged the bleakness of your situation. The realization of the harsh reality of the island and the possibility that rescue will never come weighed heavily on your heart.

Despite continuously scanning the skies for the past three weeks, neither of you had spotted even the slightest hint of a helicopter. In a desperate attempt to attract attention, you had gathered large rocks to form the word “HELP” on the beach. However, the days passed by without a single rescue mission. You had a feeling that they weren't even looking for you. Perhaps they thought both of you had succumbed to death like the other passengers.

“Oh god it's happening” you grabbed your stomach as you felt the first churn and you felt the blood dribbling down so you quickly got up and ran towards the shack to get the cloth. Daemon sighed as he realized you were going to be in additional pain today, this hasn't been easy for you two. After all, nobody truly prepares you for a situation like this where you are at the mercy of nature on a remote island, stripped of all your comforts and basic necessities.

When you came back after a few minutes, it was turning dark already so Daemon had got the fire ready and also prepared the bed of leaves for you so you immediately laid down on it.

“What can I do darling” he asked you softly as he caressed your head so you groaned in response.

“Take my uterus” he couldn't help but chuckle in amusement. In an attempt to alleviate your suffering, he heated a coconut shell over the fire and wrapped it in a piece of cloth before placing it gently on your belly. The gesture would have made you bawl your eyes out if you weren't already crying from the pain. You always felt as if your pain was on the number ten but you knew most women felt that way.

“God i wanna die..I wanna die daemon..i am done..i can't ..I can't..just kill me I'm done” you began to cry profusely so he laid down next to you and wrapped his arms around you.

“You're not going to die my brave girl..I'll get you through this alright” his tone was gentle and reassuring.

“It hurts so bad ..”

“I know..i know” he really wished he could have eased your pain somehow and then he remembered something.

“Ummmm may I offer a suggestion?” he pulled away to look at you, your cheek was soaked with tears.

“Don't suggest sex, we can't have sex” you mumbled between your cries so he smiled.

“I almost forgot you are off pills”

You hummed in agreement as he said that. You didn't want to have sex with him to prevent yourself from falling in love with him, the thought of the pills hadn't even crossed your mind “I can still do something” he mumbled as he scooted closer to you so you scooted away.

“What are you doing?” You asked him so he wrapped his arm around your waist, his fingers gently caressed circles on your skin.

“Just trying to help” he mumbled softly as he kissed your forehead, even though his mind was racing and he really wanted to kiss you, he went with his better judgment and refrained.

In the last three weeks both of you had seen each other be at your worsts, physically and mentally, and the old Daemon that had never suffered through such a turmoil, for him perhaps seeing a woman stripped down to her primal nature in every possible way might not have evoked such emotions but this new Daemon that had suffered and was lucky enough to have this gorgeous brave woman by his side on this journey, he only found himself being more drawn towards you every passing day.

Lily still crossed his mind every damn day, he was still in love with her but a part of him resented her as well because he couldn't get over that part where their lives were in imminent danger and she didn't look for him.

“Daemon” you whispered as he unbuttoned your pants and his hand slipped inside, at first he slowly rubbed his fingers over your clothed mound and the gesture was enough to make you feel aroused.

Even amidst the excruciating pain you couldn't deny how attracted you were to him, the beard was awakening something in you and you weren't ready for it. You clenched your thighs around his hand to feel the pressure because the underwear and the cloth you were using as a pad was hindering the sensation from building.

Tears rolled down your eyes as you still felt the pain but he was definitely distracting you as well as he could, you weren't even sure if the orgasm was going to help but you really needed the distraction.

He leaned down to kiss your cheek and it made your breath hitch in your chest.

“Can I touch you without the barrier?” He whispered in your ear so you nodded, at this point you were done being civil about it, it's not as if he hadn't fucked you once already during your periods.

He brought his other hand over your head and caressed your scalp while his fingers slipped into your underwear, you gasped as he used his index and middle fingers to rub across the insides of your labia, thumb played with your clit simultaneously, your breath quickened and fingers clenched around his biceps as the sensation began to build slowly.

"Have you done this before?’ you asked him but your voice came out in breathless whispers which immediately rushed the blood to his cock, it's been three weeks of no release for him as we. He didn't remember going this long without a sexual release ever since he had turned thirteen.

“Mmmm i have pleasured women before darling” he mumbled softly and you gasped as his middle finger slipped inside you. Curling his digit inside he looked for your sweet spot, his long slender fingers were one of the reasons he was so good at pleasing women using just his hands.

“No I mean like this” you murmured softly so he shook his head,

“No..i had sex with lily while she bled but she never allowed me to touch her with my fingers”

“Ohhh okay” you whispered and your nails dug into his skin as his digit brushed over that spot that made you see millions of stars on a very clear night.

“Is it weird?” you asked him as you moaned so he leaned down to kiss your neck,

“Mmmhm but I like it.. I like weird, i like touching you like this when you're going through something so natural”

His thumb played with your clit while he pumped two fingers in and out, didn't take you long enough to cum around him, it has been three weeks since you had touched yourself..

He had left you gasping and shaking with that orgasm. Much to your shock and relief the cramp had subsided, it was still there but the pain had gone down from ten to five almost immediately.

“Thank you..thank you so much” you mumbled softly as you caressed his cheek so he leaned down to kiss your forehead and pulled his hand out of you to go wash them off the blood. When he came back you noticed the clear bulge in his pants, you were hoping things won't get weird between you two now, he was still hung up on Lily and you had learned that important lesson the last time.

You really had learned your lesson but he had done something nice for you, something sweet and thoughtful and–

“Do you want me to touch you?” You whispered in his ear as he laid down next to you so he turned his head to look at you. You had helped him go through the migraine attack he has suffered so he really just wanted to help you the same.

“Didn't do it for the exchange” he turned his body towards you as he propped himself on his elbow so you wrapped hand around his neck to caress his nap, you both had been cuddling each other for warmth since you got here so the position didn't really seem foreign.

“I know…I just..you must need it too”

He sucked in a breath as your hand slipped down and you didn't waste a second before you pulled him out of the confinement of his pants, he was hard and leaking as you had assumed.

You brought your hand up and looked at him confidently,

“Spit”

The way you said the word made him feel weak in the knees, there was no room for argument or discussion anymore nor did he want it. He grabbed your palm and brought it closer to his mouth to dribble down his spit which you used as a lube to stroke him slowly.

Perhaps you'd have never done this in your normal life, you never would have felt so bold and confident but here on this island, far away from the civilization, there were no rules for any of you. In nature you found yourself to be an extension of it.

“That feel okay?” You mumbled softly as you pumped his cock up and down slowly and all he could respond with was a moan and the clenching of his jaw. It felt more than okay, it felt amazing. His mouth kept opening as the pleasure built slowly, he looked like a fish out of water as you increased the pace ever so slowly.

Shallow breaths heated up quickly as he was driven to the edge just from a few strokes of your skilled hand, he never imagined you had it in you, when he met you for the first time for some reason he thought of you as a sweet, shy prudish girl but you kept surprising him with your actions.

Loud grunt spilled from his throat as he came, his cum splattered all between you two but you didn't mind it at all, you didn't care.

He panted heavily as he tried to recover from the mind numbing orgasm, for a moment he had forgotten where he was, for a moment he just felt as if he was on a beach fooling around with a beautiful girl, you had made him escape his mind and he was afraid he'd get addicted to that feeling.

No words were spoken as you cleaned yourselves with the sea water but there was no awkwardness whatsoever between you two either, once you both returned you took your usual spot on the leaves.

“Can I ask you a personal question?” You mumbled so he hummed in response.

“Why did you and Lily break up?” he sighed as he heard her name.

“Long story short, we had been together for a long time, we were eighteen when we first met, a few years into the relationship we broke up a few times when it got difficult but found our way back to each other every time..this time around was going to be the same”

Doesn't this negate the whole purpose of a relationship you wondered, aren't you supposed to ride through the hard times together?

“Doesn't it bother you? Letting go of the girl you love?” confusion was visible in your voice, you didn't want to judge their relationship but it just didn't feel right.

“It does but I figured it would be better than losing her completely”

“Hmmmmmm”

“Are you feeling better?” He asked you so you nodded before you turned on your side and closed your eyes.

That night you woke up to a huge spider crawling on your body which immediately made you jump and scream from the top of your lungs, Daemon had no idea whether the spider was poisonous or not so he just grabbed a huge block of rock to end it's life which you weren't really proud of, the island was their home and you two were the ones intruding.

There was a spider bite on your leg which made him worry, he asked you if you were feeling okay and you just nodded in response, the bit mark stung but you felt fine. However Daemon didn't go to sleep that night, he was watching you like a hawk, fearing that you'd die and leave him all alone here.

The next morning when you woke up he hugged you as warmly as he could before you two got on with your day.

The mornings somehow seemed shorter than the nights and everyday when you woke up, daemon took you into the woods to grab freshwater from the river, in four weeks you had encountered snakes, countless of bugs and spiders, he had suggested to eat snakes when he wasn't able to catch a fish but you preferred to starve and die than put a snake in your mouth.

His will to survive was stronger than yours, he had people he wanted to go back to and you had family as well but everyday was making you more and more hopeless, you weren't as strong as him. You kept thinking about your next menstrual cycle arriving and the thought made you shudder, something would eventually kill you and you knew that.

“Why are you so quiet?” He asked you as he sat down next to you, you were halfway into the sea water so he joined you.

“I am losing hope daemon, i know you don't want to hear that but I am losing hope and my sanity everyday”

You hadn't seen any helicopter flying over you yet and you didn't think you were going to either.

“You're not alone in feeling this way okay?” He mumbled as he wrapped his arms around you, both of you had lost a considerable amount of weight in the past two months which was given as you were somehow surviving on fruits and occasional fish but your appetite had decreased as well.

“What will we do if they never come?” your eyes welled up as you questioned him.

“Then we will be here, just like this, we will make a home here and survive as long as we can.. I'll build a house for you from the scratch if I have to”

The moment he said that you broke down and hugged him as tightly as you could. That's when he cupped your cheeks between his palms and kissed you briefly before he pulled away to look at you, then he leaned into you to kiss you deeply this time, the last time you had kissed him was when you had sex on that drunken night.

However you didn't have time to even relish the kiss or think about what it meant to any of you because you heard it, you heard the loud sound of a helicopter whirling in the sky. Daemon jumped up, frantically waving his arms about, trying to signal the helicopter. His actions were desperate and urgent. You wished you had stayed awake for the moment where they came to rescue you both but the relief and shock pushed your already weak body over the edge and you passed out immediately.

However when your eyes flutter open next you were all alone on the beach and Daemon wasn't there. He was gone.

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

Taglist

@mcufan72 @123forgottherest @shuichiakainx

[acti-veg]

do you have any advice for someone (me) who spent most of her life as the world's #1 zoo defender but is now majorly questioning them? i now aim to be a field conservationist, but for years on end i wanted to be a zookeeper, and i fully believed in the educational benefits zoo proponents are always touting. but after doing a ton of research into how harmful captivity is on animals, the horrific captures required to bring them into captivity, the compelling evidence for nonhuman personhood for vertebrates, and the educational failures of zoos (as well as reading the excellent essay by derrick jenson you've posted about in the past), i'm now super conflicted. i can't deny the big impact zoos had on me as a child, though. sorry to just dump in your inbox like this but this issue is driving me nuts so i figured i'd ask someone who is also passionate about it

For many people, the hardest thing to give up in their journey to going vegan is something like cheese, or eggs. For me it was zoos. Even when I was eating fully plant-based, getting rid of my animal fabrics slowly and avoing anything animal-tested, it took some time for me to do the research and really see this place where so many of my happiest childhood memories occured was actually pretty harmful. I was right where you are now.

That essay encouraged me to reframe my thinking in terms of who is actually benefiting from the arrangement. Conservation of animals in captivity who will never realistically be released - what are we conserving exactly, and for who? Education, but for who? What do we actually learn from zoos, really? I looked at the most notable achievements of zoos, and wondered if they could have been achieved without putting animals in captivity for public viewing. I found that some of the most significant conservation stories came not from zoos, but charities, private breeding programs, rewilding and land conservation

. Similarly, documentaries educate just as well as zoos do, if not far better, because the animals we are seeing are exhibiting their natural behaviour, as opposed to their atypical, stressed and often depressive captive counterparts. There just isn't a great deal we can learn from observing animals in wholly unnatural surroundings, they develop completely abnormal social structures, often zoochosis, and we have built several fundamental misunderstandings of wild animal behaviour on assumptions made by exhibiting behaviour that exclusively occurs in captive animals.

There is just no reason why conserving animals and educating the public should need animals to be on display for our amusement, and for the profit of their owners. What good zoos do can be done far better by institutions who do not have the vested interest of profiting from their incarceration, and can conserve and learn from animals in their natural environment.

[ladyinbooks]

So at any given point (in any given day), you can usually find me thinking about Hephaistion Amyntoros. (Yes, I'm a Classicist. Yes, I have favourites, ok?)

I recently made the choice to watch Netflix's Alexander the Great docudrama, and while I have a lot of Thoughts on it (let's not get me started on the cutesy nicknames, because I'm still gnashing my teeth), I did have a good laugh at the fact some reviewers are getting themselves in an absolute twist over the fact that Alexander might have - gasp! - been in love with Hephaistion! (I feel like we're reliving 2004, and the legendary threat by a group of Greek lawyers to sue Oliver Stone over this exact same thing...). The whole Alexander/Hephaistion thing is not...new. At all. I am not sure why this is apparently a surprise.

(Like, it's 2024 and we're still really ignoring Diogenes and his little dig to Alexander about Hephaistion's thighs, huh?*)

Personally, I take far more issue with not letting Hephaistion be seen as competent in documentaries/dramas. Let him be his awesome self! He was out there running logistics, enacting diplomacy, getting the army fed and watered and running Alexander's empire (not on his own, but he achieved the highest ranking office the year before his death and he got it because he was darn good at what he did). Hephaistion was capable. Eminently capable. He had politicians and philosophers writing to him, and yes the likelihood was they did so because he had the ear of the king, but the reason he had that ear at all was because the king trusted him to handle those issues well.

So let's give the man his dues please. (And if you'd like more info on any of this, I'd wholeheartedly suggest picking up any of the research done by Dr Jeanne Reames, who examines Hephaistion and his role beautifully.)

*Yes, I know, that source is unreliable - ssh, let me have this

[ittyybittybaker]

“neil is living in andrew’s walls” this is going to live in my brain forever now, much like neil in andrew’s walls,

listen i wrote those tags when i was half asleep and i thought that would be it but i am, in fact, still thinking about it !!!! i picture it like this

nicky and the twins live together in the columbia house (kevin technically doesn't live there but he's at their place like 5 nights a week so he might as well at this point)

the columbia house is OLD, like over 100 years so there's all sorts of weird crawl spaces and an attic that no one ever goes into

neil's on the run, jumps into an open window, and finds their crawl space

maybe he's injured and needs a place to lie low for a while

he heals, but their house is reasonably safe and he can steal food from their kitchen when no one's home and he's made a kind of comfy nest in the attic

his favorite spot tho is the crawl space behind andrew's room because nicky and aaron are too loud (nicky with talking to erik and aaron with katelyn/video games probably). andrew just listens to music and like. reads or something

as he heals, neil gets braver and starts to go out into the house more and more. maybe he cleans up the kitchen every now and then or he folds the towels they leave in the dryer as a thank you for their unknowing hospitality

(really he's just bored from being cooped up for so long, even if their house is the nicest place he's stayed in a long while.)

the cousins start to notice weird things are happening

nicky thinks the house is haunted

aaron thinks they're all just being forgetful about what they leave around the house

kevin thinks they need to check the carbon monoxide detector (he saw a documentary about it once and won't stop talking about it)

but andrew doesn't believe in the supernatural, and he also doesn't think it's a mass hallucination

he spends the most time at home, and he swears he's heard a muffle laugh or too when he makes fun of kevin

and what ghost changes the channel to espn

he swears he sees someone with striking blue eyes in the kitchen one night around 3am when he's getting a glass of water but when he turns on the light there's no one there and the doors are locked from the inside

kevin's not the only one who's seen a documentary, and andrew's just watched one about a man living in someone's walls

he mentions his theory one day at breakfast but everyone just thinks he's making fun of them, so he makes a plan to prove himself right

he researches into the history of the house and find the blueprints in some archival records, and sees the weird spaces in the walls (at the library of course, if there was someone living in his walls he wouldn't risk them seeing his investigating)

neil thought he was being careful, but he was getting comfortable there and he forgot to clean up his attic nest one day. he snuck out to grab some much needed supplies from the store and also to stretch his legs

this just so happens to be the day andrew goes investigating, and finds neil's hideaway

he's there waiting for neil when he returns

somehow neil convinces andrew to let him stay by saying "you've already taken in one stray after all (aka kevin) so why not another?"

andrew has to admit, he's got a point. and he really is very pretty

so andrew lets neil hideout in his room instead of in the crawl space behind the walls

andrew starts spending a lot more time in his room. the others hear strange noises and shuffling from behind the door, even when andrew isn't home

nicky and aaron think he's adopted a pet without telling them

(they're only half wrong)

yadda yadda andriel do their thing, they build trust by sharing secrets and truths and kisses, etc

andrew decides that neil is a permanent addition to his life, and he won't ever have to hide away again

one day nicky and aaron come home and andrew's cuddling on the couch with neil

"andrew, who is this"

"this is neil."

"cool ... where did he come from"

"he was living in the walls."

"... i'm sorry, what?"

"i was right. you both owe me $20"

"...i'm sorry, WHAT?"

"ssshhh, can you keep it down? he just fell asleep."

"Andrew. what the actual FUCK-"

unfortunately, andrew is no longer paying attention. he's much too busy playing with neil's hair as he dozes

and they all lived happily ever after and no body ever lived in the walls ever again

[pub-lius]

WAKE UP ITS HAMILTON TIME (hamilton pt 1)

everyone thank richard for getting me to put all my knowledge about alexander hamilton in one place. if you're at all new or confused, @thereallvrb0y once asked me 3 years ago to tell him everything about every historical figure i can, and since then i have been doing that. now we are onto the last one on the list he gave me, and studying hamilton is literally my life's work, so here it is. on tumblr.com. for free.

my sources for this are Ron Chernow and Hamilton himself and a strange amalgamation of knowledge from different museums, documentaries, interviews with historians, and other otherwise publicly accessible knowledge that i have compiled into the vast library inside my mind! you can find my notes in the link in my pinned post. let's go (this historical research is sponsored by the ghost of freddie mercury and my aunt who made me a whole pot of coffee)

Background Information

Ron Chernow loves to talk about how the island of St. Kitts and Nevis was formed, but that's not fucking important. What's important about Hamilton's birthplace is that it was positioned in the Caribbean in such a way that made it a very easily accessible port, however the coastline was pretty smooth which made it generally unideal for mooring ships.

Source: The St. Kitts' Scenic Railway; Six Frigates: The Epic History of the Founding of the US Navy by Ian W. Toll, p. 112 ("Basseterre Roads was not a good natural harbor. It was little more than a dent in the otherwise smooth coastline that ran along the western side of the island. There was no pier- visitors were obliged to run their boats directly onto the beach, sometimes surfing in on waves that broke heavily as they reached the shore.")

Now, notice that St. Kitts and Nevis is, in geographic terms, to the right-ish of the Caribbean. That means when you're coming from Jolly Ole England, you might make a pit stop in St. Kitts and Nevis. So if you ignore the fact that the island has no natural harbor (at least not a good one), it might be a good economic prospect for a young merchant, right?

Well, not if that merchant is James Hamilton, because he was an idiot. And I say that lovingly, or at least more lovingly than Ron Chernow did. Ron Chernow also emphasized that St. Kitts and Nevis was filled with the 18th century version of Shameless, and also Jewish people. Ron Chernow might not hate Jewish people, but he does hate the character archetypes in Shameless. In Shameless terms, James Hamilton was like Frank Gallagher.

Disclaimer: knowledge of Shameless is not necessary to understand that being compared to a guy named Frank is not a good thing

I've already made posts about Hamilton's parents and brother (here, if you'd like to read that ig. weirdo), but I want to talk about the things that Hamilton would have learned from his parents. Later in life, Hamilton vaguely alluded to his father's failings in business being due to an excessive amount of generosity and not really understanding where he should and shouldn't spend his money. This did not by any means make Hamilton stingy with his money, or even smart, for that matter, but it did make him want to be something specific: independent.

James Hamilton's tragic flaw was his dependence on other people, whether it was his older brother or Rachel Faucette or his business partners, etc. Due to the position and order in which he was born, James was never destined to be a leader. He wasn't exceptional academically like other non-first-born-sons, such as James Madison, or dispositionally inclined to organize and inspire, like George Washington. He was just a dude, and he was a dude who was not built for 18th century society, especially not in the Caribbean. From what we can tell, James Hamilton was a gullible, moderately intelligent man with symptoms of autism and non-descript mental health issues. He was basically fucked from the get-go.

Source: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow (p. 12-16); Papers of Alexander Hamilton, vol. 25, p. 89, letter to William Jackson, August 26, 1800 ("In a capacity of a merchant he went to St. Kitts, where from too generous and too easy a temper he failed in business and at length fell into indigent circumstances.")

Rachel Faucette was like James Hamilton's polar opposite. She was forced to learn how to provide for herself, not being able to rely on anyone, because that could be ripped out from under her feet at any moment, and the only thing concrete in her life was herself. She was a woman, and that was what most women had to learn at some point.

Rachel was also perfectly poised to be the clear moral guide for young Hamilton. When James Hamilton left, he basically sacrificed any reverence his son might have for him, and instituted Rachel as Hamilton's sole role model for his developmental years and i just burned the shit out of my hand with coffee.

Disclaimer: James Hamilton had nothing to do with me burning the shit out of my hand with coffee, I promise. You can't blame all your problems on deadbeat dads

If you're a Sigmund Freud fan, (good opener, I know), you're aware of the Oedipus Complex, and that's not exactly what I'm talking about, but yk. look it up. This theory proposed by Freud was only partially rejected by the psychological field (due to the fact that not everything is about wanting to fuck your mom and kill your dad, and also that's not the story of Oedipus Rex like. at all??), but the part that still rang true was that children do have a unique attachment to the opposite sex parent.

Psychological studies show that children tend to describe their opposite sex parents more favorably than same sex parents. Why? I don't know, I'm not a psychologist, I'm an 18 year old who drinks coffee like he was 5 kids to raise.

Source: "The Relation between Attachment to Opposite Sex Parents and Attachment to Romantic Partners" by Gary L. Grogan and Dr. Mary E. Pritchard, p. 10 ("However, most significant for the present inquiry were the findings that respondents described their opposite sex parents more favorably, and same sex parents more critically.")

This statistic is visible in Hamilton's descriptions of his parents, and must have been enhanced by James Hamilton's early departure in his son's life, the consequences from that which seemed constant, but also by the reputation his father had built on the island he left Hamilton on. Hamilton would grow up to see his mother not only providing for herself and her children, but also overcoming the consequences of James' actions, which provoked resentment towards his father, and admiration towards his mother. This will develop as a theme throughout his life, but we'll touch on that as he grows up. He isn't even born yet! So let's get on to that.

Source: so when I say Hamilton's description of his mother, I really mean HIS son's, but JCH most likely got this description from his father, Life of Alexander Hamilton by John Church Hamilton, vol. 1, pg. 42 ("...a woman of superior intellect, elevated sentiment, and unusual grace of person and manner. To her he was indebted for his genius."); for the sake of my reliability and reputation, I'll include JCH's description of his grandfather for comparison, Intimate Life of Alexander Hamilton by John Church Hamilton, p. 13 ("Hamilton's father does not appear to have been successful in any pursuit, but in many ways was a great deal of a dreamer, and something of a student, whose chief happiness seemed to be in the society of his beautiful and talented wife, who was in every way intellectually his superior.")

Early Life

Alexander Hamilton was born ginger on January 11, 1755, and I don't entertain the argument that he was born in 1757 because I'm not an anarchist and I believe society has laws (I'm actually lying, I'll talk about the birth year debate in the college section). Hamilton was not, however, born black or Jewish. He was also, potentially, born not James Hamilton's son.

"Wh- WHAT?! *cries*" I hear you say, and I know, it's shocking information, but yes. First off, Hamilton was not black in any percentage more than the Pillsbury dough boy is black. This theory comes from the fact that Rachel Faucette was a lower class woman and therefore we have no proof that she WASN'T partially black. I don't even have to dispute that for anyone with a gram of critical thinking skills to see that that isn't a valid historical hypothesis.

The Jewish thing has a little more merit to it, and there's a whole book about it that I haven't read. There is some evidence to suggest that Rachel Faucette's ex husband, Johann Lavien, could have been a secret Jewish person, and possibly caused Rachel herself to convert, and she tried to pass on that to Hamilton by having a Jewish woman educate him when he was a toddler (that last part is a true fact, and is the earliest piece of information we have about Hamilton's education). If this is true, (and it's nearly impossible to prove true or false because well if Lavien was a secret Jew, it was a secret), it did not impact Hamilton's religious beliefs in any way, and he identified as a Christian throughout his entire life.

We'll do a paternity test on Hamilton later, just hang tight. See, this is how I get you, I say something controversial, and then I don't talk about it until 16 paragraphs later.

Source: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow, p. 9 ("A persistent mythology in the Caribbean asserts that Rachel was partly black, making Alexander Hamilton a quadroon or an octoroon. In this obsessively race-conscious society, however, Rachel was invariably listed among the whites on local tax rolls. Her identification as someone of mixed race has no basis in verifiable fact. (See pages 734-35 [this is in Chernow's Acknowledgments, and he just talks about how he used a paper trail to come to this conclusion, and thought genetic research would only confuse the evidence. He also discusses that there is a small chance that Hamilton fathered a black child named William Hamilton, but I can go ahead and tell you that's false due to the fact that Hamilton had just arrived in America when William was born -HWS]) The folklore that Hamilton was mulatto probably arose from the incontestable truth that many, if not most, illegitimate children in the West Indies bore mixed blood."); Life of Alexander Hamilton by John Church Hamilton, vol. 1, p. 42 ("...rarely as he alluded to his personal history, he mentioned with a smile his having been taught to repeat the Decalogue in Hebrew, at the school of a Jewess, when so small that he was placed standing by her side upon a table); Ibid., vol. 7, p. 710-11; Papers of Alexander Hamilton, vol. 26, p. 774, "Comments on Jews"

Hamilton's education began with his mother, who is almost definitely the person who made him fluent in French by the time he came to America. Despite limited access to books (34 books in both French and English to be specific), Hamilton still studied everything he could from a young age, with an early love for learning new things and proving that he was smarter than you. However, most of his education was in the School of Hard Knocks Community College, which was amply provided by the environment around him.

In the height of the British Empire, the Caribbean was essentially a social prison for anyone who broke the moral laws of the colonial, Eurocentric society of the time. This included pirates, prostitutes, drunks, thieves, and basically anyone who didn't fit the mold for a member of high society and/or someone who could serve high society and their lives of luxury. Hamilton, by birth, was one of these people.

Hamilton's father moved the family to St. Croix right before he left, which was a dramatic shift from Hamilton's life on St. Kitts and Nevis. In St. Croix, everyone knew Hamilton's mother as the disgraced ex-wife of Johann Lavien, and therefore knew her two sons as "whore-children", which was a word usually given to illegitimate children. Here, Hamilton was roped in with the degenerates of society, and it was practically said directly to him that he was destined to be unholy, unclean, worthless, and disgusting. Could you believe that this would have an impact on his mental health?

Along with seeing the poor lifestyles of the inhabitants of the Caribbean, Hamilton also saw glimpses into a very different world: ~rich people~. There were few rich white people on the islands, and they owned vast amounts of enslaved people, with the black to white ratio being 8:1 in the Caribbean. These enslaved people were forced to live in horrible conditions, and Hamilton saw it everywhere- his mother owned three people, but they were often rented out to garner profit for the white family, rather than working a plantation as others in the Caribbean did. Violence towards enslaved black people was only part of the violence young Hamilton witnessed in the Caribbean, some of which came in the form of dueling *insert ominous music*

Source: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow, p. 18 ("To the extent that dueling later entranced Hamilton to an unhealthy degree, this fascination may have originated in the most fabled event in Nevis in the 1750s [a duel between two men where one of them was killed"); Ibid., p. 19; Ibid., p. 23-24

James Hamilton abandoned the family in 1765, and the reasons he did so are debated, but most likely are due to debt. However, there's another possibility that I've alluded to before: Hamilton's paternity.

So, remember, Rachel Faucette is not a perfect angel, and she also didn't particularly care for matrimony. There is a chance that she was with other men besides Hamilton and Lavien, and though we have no evidence that she was, there is an interesting character I'd like to throw into the mix.

Thomas Stevens, a moderately rich guy, was a merchant who lived on King Street in Charleston, St. Croix, with his wife Ann and his son Edward, who was born a year before Alexander Hamilton. Thomas Stevens was a very generous guy, and Edward Stevens would later be lifelong friends with Alexander Hamilton. And uh. They looked almost exactly the same. I really wish we had a portrait of Edward Stevens, but according to literally everyone, it was hard to tell the difference between him and Hamilton. Now, statistically, we all have some kind of doppelganger out there, but like what are the chances that they grew up down the street from each other and their parents had suspiciously close connections? Now, I'm not saying that Hamilton should have been Alexander Stevens, I think that's pretty irrelevant, but it is possible that Thomas Stevens... you... ARE THE FATHER!!!

Source: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow, p. 27-28 ("Nevertheless, in the absence of direct proof, the notion that Alexander was the biological son of Thomas Stevens instead of James Hamilton would clarify many oddities in Hamilton's biography.")

The Hamiltons' life post-dad-desertion was actually somewhat comfortable due to Rachel's kickassery. She established a little store for a source of income, relocated a couple times, rented out the enslaved people (as one does, i guess, that's such a wild phrase), and kept a pet goat for milk and cheese and idk soap or whatever else people make with goat milk. Her sons would help out, possibly providing an origin for Hamilton's incessant need to be productive at all times without resting. At times, they were supported by his aunt Ann Lytton Mitchell, who he would remain loyal to until his death. During this time, as he was old enough to understand what his father did, is probably when his fiercely loyal, chivalrous and family-driven attitude developed.

Source: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow, p. 22-23; Ibid., p. 28

I'm so hopped up on caffeine I could do a triathalon.

Hamilton and his mother were both afflicted by a strange and unspecified illness in the winter of 1768. The primary symptom was a severe fever, and they were treated with purgatives, medicinal herbs, and bloodletting. Nothing helped, and Rachel died at 9 pm on February 19. Hamilton miraculously survived.

Immediately, Hamilton and his brother James had everything they owned taken away, indebted by bills charged against them by local debtors. Their half brother inherited whatever else belonged to their mother, which brought up the marital scandal all over again, beginning a legal battle that lasted for around a year. In the end, the two Hamilton brothers were left with two things: jack shit and fuck all.

Custody of the two boys was appointed to their cousin, Peter Lytton. In my notes, I described him as "white trash" and "insane", including the quotes, so idk who said that. Peter Lytton lived with his black mistress and their illegitimate child. He killed himself on July 6, 1769, and what's strange about that is that we don't know if he shot or stabbed himself. I don't know who got confused about the difference between a knife and a gun, but that isn't my problem.

To make a bad situation worse, Peter Lytton didn't leave the boys anything in his will, and neither did his father, who did "his best" to help. His best could have been even just mentioning the name Hamilton in his will, but whatever, I guess.

These events held very important lessons for the young Alexander: 1) nothing lasts forever; 2) everyone dies; 3) the legal system is terrible; 4) rich people hate you; and, most importantly, 5) the only way out was up.

Source: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow, p. 22-27

On His Own

This marked a split between Hamilton and his older brother, but this didn't seem to affect him as much as what happened with his parents- possibly because he wasn't biologically his brother, but I don't really care about that. What's more important is that Hamilton was almost entirely on his own, with inconsistent housing, so he couldn't always rely on the Stevenses. He was in a very similar situation that his mother was in at one time not long ago: alone and self reliant.

Hamilton was already working for the mercantile company, Beekman and Cruger. This company was later renamed, so I'll just say that Hamilton worked for Cruger, who was a business man with ties to New York. Hamilton worked as a clerk at this import-export business, giving him the responsibility to monitor intake and outtake as well as the organization of papers and just generally keeping everything in line. Due to the international relevance that was St. Croix, Hamilton often used French in his business dealings. Here, Hamilton perfected his handwriting into that elegant mess we know and can't read, picked up information on shipping/navigation, and learned his famously proficient math skills, particularly in relation to finance and economics.

Hamilton's famously maniacal work ethic began here, but so did his yearning for military valor. The first piece of personal correspondence we have from Hamilton is a letter to bestie Edward Stevens, and was made very famous from The Musical.

"Im confident, Ned that my Youth excludes me from any hopes of immediate Preferment nor do I desire it, but I mean to prepare the way for futurity. Im no Philosopher you see and may be jusly said to Build Castles in the Air. My Folly makes me ashamd and beg youll Conceal it, yet Neddy we have seen such Schemes successfull when the Projector is Constant I shall Conclude saying I wish there was a War. I am Dr Edward Yours Alex Hamilton (sic)"

Source: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow, p. 29-30; Alexander Hamilton to Edward Stevens, November 11, 1769, St. Croix; Library of Congress, Image 13 of Alexander Hamilton Papers: General Correspondence, 1734-1804; 1734-1772

When Cruger left St. Croix for New York due to medical reasons in 1771, he left 16 year old Alexander Hamilton in charge of his primary source of income. And you're probably thinking that's a stupid idea. Because it is.

BUT ITS ALEXANDER HAMILTON. SO IT WAS FINE??? Well, fine for everyone besides the captain of the HMS Thunderbolt.

The Thunderbolt pulled into St. Croix's busy harbor after crossing the ocean and manned by a veteran captain, however Hamilton was not satisfied with the outfitting of the ship nor the quality of the goods that had been transported.

"Reflect continually on the unfortunate voyage you have just made and endeavor to make up for the considerable loss therefrom accruing to your owners." -Alexander Hamilton to Captain Newton, February 1, 1772

You can really see Hamilton's "I'm better than you and I know it" attitude shining through, made more shocking than ever than the fact that he was SIXTEEN YEARS OLD and talking to a man who was LITERALLY TWICE HIS AGE. The only reason he didn't lose his job over this is because he was right. The mules that had been transported were in such poor health, Hamilton had to pull strings to get them sold, and the wood was too waterlogged to be sold on the open market, so he sold it to a private buyer who was able to find something to do with them. He showed quick thinking, confidence in his abilities, and managerial skills. It was these skills that would later appeal to George Washington, not his financial abilities, and led to his most important appointment.

Source: Papers of Alexander Hamilton, vol. 1, p. 23, letter to Tileman Cruger, February 1, 1772 ("It would be undoubtedly a great pity that such a vessel [the Thunderbolt] should be lost for the want of them [cannons]."); Ibid., p.4, letter to Captain Newton, February 1, 1772; Alexander Hamilton: A Biography by Forrest McDonald, p. 128 ("Taken aback, Washington replied, 'I always knew Colonel Hamilton to be a man of superior talents, but never supposed that he had any knowledge of finance.")

Cruger's firm also engaged in the Atlantic slave trade, as did the majority of trading firms in the Caribbean and the American south. It was this exposure to the abhorrent conditions on slave ships and the violence African people faced in the triangle trade that shaped Hamilton into a vocal opponent of slavery- when it was convenient. More impactful was the fear he developed of slave revolts, as was very common in the Caribbean because of the disproportionate slave to free/black to white ratio in the islands, and this would later define his views on the French Revolution and public protest in general. He and Thomas Jefferson had this in common.

Hamilton continued studying books in his free time, and the local newspaper, the Royal Danish American Gazette, began publishing poems from an anonymous young writer- obviously it was Hamilton. His poems ranged in subjects, and aren't particularly good, but they're better than any poems I've written angrily in my journal about my evil exes, so that is to his credit.

Hamilton's poems took a religious turn, most likely traceable to the arrival of Reverend Hugh Knox, who took in Hamilton as a mentor. Clergymen were a hot commodity in the hell hole that was the Caribbean, and Knox had a lot of work on his hands, but he took a particular interest in Hamilton, specifically in getting him out of the aforementioned hell hole. He saw that Hamilton was incredibly intelligent and hard working, almost to a fault- he was probably the first person who was genuinely concerned for this dude's health over how much he worked.

Fun fact, Knox also had personal ties to the Burr family, but that is literally only a fun fact and not a sign that Burr and Hamilton were star-crossed lovers in fair Verona or whatever Chernow has deluded himself into thinking.

Source: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow, p. 32-33; Ibid., p. 34

Source: National Guard Bureau, "Examining Lessons from Katrina 10 Years Later"

Then, a massive hurricane struck the Caribbean on August 1, 1772. It was incredibly damaging, causing mass destruction in St. Croix, and this is most definitely one that we in the south would evacuate for. Even my dad would evacuate for this one, and it took a lot of convincing to get him to evacuate for Katrina.

In reaction to this event, Hamilton wrote his famous letter to his father detailing and reflecting on the storm. And finally, I'm giving y'all my analysis of this letter that I keep saying I'll do. However, this post is already incredibly long, so I'm going to do it in a google doc and attach it here.

Source: Alexander Hamilton to The Royal Danish American Gazette, September 6, 1772

The letter was published to The Royal Danish American Gazette, which spread around the afflicted community. Knox's congregation gathered money for the anonymous young author (now not very anonymous) to sail to the American mainland for his education. Originally, Hamilton went to study medicine, due to the high demand for doctors in the Caribbean (his knowledge of anatomy would remain helpful throughout his life). However, at some point he decided he would not be going back to the Caribbean, and switched his focus to law, but we'll discuss that more in part two.

Source: Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow, p. 37-40

Well, there's part one. I did all of this in one day because um. I don't know, but it is now one in the morning and i have to wake up earlier than normal. so that's fun. i hope y'all enjoyed. shout out to my mom for proofreading half of this, and shout out to my aunt who gave me coffee, that was a horrible idea. i'll be back with part two at some point, which will probably be more concise because hamilton's childhood in the caribbean is where most of the theories are, so yeah. love y'all.

[trans-axolotl]

I went to the anarchist/abolitionist healthcare conference this weekend, and it was really a beautiful experience that I don't even have words for. Being able to share resources, knowledge, dreams, and joy together with other people invested in this work was so special, and I gained a ton of hope by seeing the many ways that other people are actively engaged in resisting these fucked up systems and building care into our communities. I gave a presentation about psych abolition, talked about resistance within the psych ward, and got a standing ovation from a room filled with 50 people, many of whom were mental health professionals looking to build solidarity. I legitimately almost cried because of being to have that experience with my mad comrades. I met so many beautiful crazy people who intimately understand what it means to survive as a mad person, and just gained so much knowledge from people actively putting their abolitionist values into practice. I want to share a few of my favorite resources that I became aware of at this conference, and I'll make another post later with some of my key takeaways.

Mutual Aid Self/Social Therapy: This is a support framework designed by one of my friends that provides an intentional structure for providing therapetuic support within communities, especially organizing communities where there's a lot of burnout. It offers so many resources for skills training to allow anyone, whether you have a background in emotional support or not, to set this up within your community. The framework is purposefully not hierarchial or transactional, and allows for actually addressing people's material conditions as well as providing space for emotional processing.

Of Unsound Mind: Incredible archive and research on psychiatric history. Mostly focused around America, but also has some info on other countries. The author of the website will be coming out with a book later this year, which I think is mostly going to be about the Trieste, Basaglia, and that history of psych resistance in Italy.

Power makes us Sick: Collective that focuses on autonomous healthcare and emotional support, especially in terms of autonomous trans healthcare. Has some fabulous zines and resources.

A Corpse among Corpses: Incredible documentary about asylum graveyards in the Midwest and the trade of graverobbing for experimentation in medical schools, and how this connects to settler colonialism, slavery, eugenics, and modern gentrification. Really do want to emphasize a trigger warning for genocide, eugenics, medical violence, self harm, antiblack racism, instituionalization, and lots of discussion of death. I talked a lot with the filmmakers, and really appreciated their care and intent in making this film as a way of bearing witness rather than exploiting atrocity in the name of art, but do want to be very clear that this film is incredibly heavy to watch and might be something worth doing with other people. It was deeply impactful for me, and made me tear up many times.

The Living Museum: Through transforming the old Creedmoor hospital grounds into a musuem and workspace for current patients to showcase their art, this space celebrates psychiatric resistance, transformation, struggle, and joy. I really want to go visit and share in that space, as it seems just so fucking cool. It seems like you might need to contact directly to schedule a visit.

Cahoots Crisis Response Model: This is one model for crisi intervention teams that respond instead of police. They are not perfect, still have some enagement with police, but are an interesting example of how to try to implement these types of programs. Since theyv'e been around for 25 years, they have a lot of knoweldeg and could be a good first group to reach out to if you're trying to create this in your community.

Overall this whole weekend was a beautiful example of how to put our values into practice, and really just wanted to share these projects with you all!

[mj1343]

Watched Hbomberguy's Oof video and Defunctlands Disney Channel theme video back to back. Been a fan of Defunctland for a while but never really consumed Hbomberguy. I just

The duality of H's video ending with a talk about the small artist not being appreciated for their work, and often only being appreciated for their one big popular thing, for history passing by if not recorded, for the quote "And it honestly on a spiritual level fills me with immense grief thinking about the things i care about dying unrecognized for what they did and being forgotten" in a quest originally to uncover the truth of one sound and turning into an exposition on one mans insane antics and stealing credit from the little man

And Defunctland's video ending with a breakdown, one artist alone talking about being underappreciated and not seen as a true artist because they put their work in a video game instead of a movie or a youtube video instead of a netfix documentary, one artist feeling immense regret that he was just moments too late to interview a man dying unrecognized for what he did and was widely forgotten until the video came to light and unburied it from under hundreds of pounds of corporate nonsense, that he couldnt know what the little man put in but he could help his legacy survive as more than the one big popular thing he did

Life is finite and without having hour and a half long+ videos, and more commonly deep dives and studies uncovering the truth, history can be skewed to remain anonymous or warped by pathological greedy liars because it is "just one jingle" and "just one sound" again and again until its all of a companies jingles having to have been written by SOMEONE, but no one knows who, or all of these sound effects had to been have made by SOMEONE, but someone else has a bigger mouth and wallet

Two incredible videos coming out at the same time having similar themes. They only compliment eachother more, but they could both easily stand on their own. Defunctland's storytelling and editing is incredible as always, and although i have much less knowledge about him, Hbomberguy's video is hilarious and incredibly interesting, and both are so well researched. Good content is good