#a little guy who just literally does not exist?
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For fun how about rating Wukong ship from lmk and give your opinion why?
SWK Ship Ratings
(Scores rank from -10 at the lowest, and 10 at the highest)
Shadowpeach
Name Rating: 5/10. Basic, but rolls off the tongue. Started the trend of Sun Wukong having extremely basic ship names- more on that below.
Canon Rating: 0/10. Whatever they had in the past, Macaque simply treats Wukong far too awfully to really justify the two of them ever getting together. Even the attempts at reconciliation feel more like extremely forced ship baiting, given how it goes from one of the two being marginally kinder to the other than usual, then immediately dropping it for more sniping. (Past!Shadowpeach receives 5/10.)
Fanon Rating: -10/10. Iâve spoken at length about this, but fans love to distort Wukong into a drooling abuser so stupid he canât breath through his nose, usually while turning Macaque into a Possession Sue who only serves to be the authorâs simpering self-insert who is the most perfect little baby of all time who has never ever done anything wrong at all even once. If there is an attempt to be ânuancedâ or âunbiasedâ it manifest as âSun Wukong âkilledâ (re: defended himself against) Macaque so heâs worse.â Itâs an awful, extremely pervasive dynamic that rots any fandom enjoyment I could have had for this couple.
Personal Enjoyment: 6/10. Getting to write Macaque as the legitimately awful person that he is takes off the edge of seeing constant âuwu sadboiâ Macaque content. Still, I rarely touch anyone elseâs Shadowpeach content because of this.
Peachlotus
Name Rating: 2/10. As youâll see, most ship names involving Sun Wukong are, uh⌠extremely lazy. Just one of the other characterâs traits with âpeachâ slapped before/after it. Fandom really dropped the ball with most of these. This one is especially clunky, at least on my tongue.
(See, Macaque gets stuff like Lunartides, Inkypages, Shadowpeach, etc- all very cool.. We need to diversify the nouns is what Iâm saying. Coulda been something like âGingerRootâ cause orange fur + plant boy. âFlowerBudsâ for the platonic name for peaches + lotuses. Do you guys see what Iâm saying. It canât just be raw peaches all the way down.)
Canon Rating: 2/10. Ne Zha also doesnât treat Wukong too kindly, interacting with him mostly through insults and physical attacks. He does seem to have some understanding of the king, though, which gives him a slight boost over Macaque.
Fanon Rating: 1/10. It barely exists, and what little does exist is essentially just âNe Zha is mad at Wukong over what the fuck ever, so theyâre fightingâ and little more. Thereâs a lot of potential for bonding over immortality and awful pasts or being commandeered by domineering authority figures, which I wish was used more often.
Personal Enjoyment: 2/10. I donât see the dynamic, personally. Again, Ne Zhaâs only interactions with him are only ever vitriolic or exasperated in nature, which doesnât leave stable footing for a relationship to stand. Maybe Iâll make a chatbot for them one day and see if I come around to it.
âFreepeachesâ
Name Rating: -5/10. This shit is exactly what Iâm talking about with the lazily slapping âpeachâ onto whatever and going on. âFreeâ has no meaning between Wukong and Tang- itâs just a holdover from a more popular ship. Tang only mooches food from Pigsy. Thatâs one of the biggest elements of their dynamic. Sure, Tang likes free stuff (food, rides, physical labor), but when does he ever get that from Wukong? It just makes no sense.
AND IF IT HAD TO HAVE THE FRUIT, TANGYPEACHES WAS RIGHT THERE
Canon Rating: 6/10. Tang literally drew himself and the Monkey King together inside a heart. He adores Wukong, thought maybe not for who he truly is- and the two donât any interaction in terms of Tang realizing his autistic parasocial special interest idol is a lonely old sage who misses his friends, which cripples what was a pretty cute dynamic. I think Tang coming down from his hero worship and being just a genuine friend to SWK would be cute, definitely.
Fanon Rating: 9/10. Pretty enjoyable! Freepeaches is one of the few dynamics where Sun Wukong isnât constantly turned into a punching bag/villain to be beaten around for the amusement of the audience, and the two are often portrayed as legitimately healthy together- I especially enjoy how Tang is portrayed as needing to move past his hero worship for the two to have a healthy relationship. Itâs cute.
Personal Enjoyment: 6/10. Never addressing the resemblance to Sanzang or having them interact in regards to this while the circlet is back on Wukongâs head feels like a massively missed opportunity, honestly. I think Sun Wukongâs personal feelings have been left to the wayside for far too long in canon, and getting to a point where almost every fucking character represses their feelings is lazy and boring.
Peachbuns
Name Rating: 4/10. Again. Just âpeachâ slapped onto an adjective or noun. Itâs frustratingly boring. This one sounds delicious and both components are related to food at least, which fits Pigsyâs background⌠but it also sounds like something a horny dude would ask for pics of in your DMs.
Canon Rating: 1/10. Pigsy isnât willing to take any of Wukongâs shit, so he serves as a pretty great âbullshit barrierâ that provides a legitimately strict opposing force to Wukong, but thereâs little else to even their relationship out. Heâs never kind or supportive or worried- if the two interact, itâs always through the lens of âPigsy is mad/suspiciousâ. Thereâs never any real bonding or growth between them at all.
Fanon Rating: 4/10. This ship barely exists, and when it does itâs Sun Wukong being lectured through life by a big strong man- not a dynamic Iâm a fan of. However, it is surprisingly kind to Wukong in terms of empathizing with his struggles. Again, I wish there was less of âPigsy teaches Wukong basic life skillsâ because it falls right back into the revolting fanon that is âSWK is a big dumb fuck who canât read or cook or take care of himself without a husband to wipe his ass.â
Personal Enjoyment: 2/10. I just donât click with it. Pigsy doesnât like Wukong, doesnât trust him, and doesnât interact with him outside of that.
Moonstone
Name Rating: 10/10. This is what I like! Moonstone is not only a very real (and very beautiful) mineral, but it ties to both of them equally! You donât see Wukongâs status as a stone-born demon be referenced often, so this is a refreshing change of pace from the constant âpeachâ names.
Canon Rating: 7/10. Changâe is a lovely woman who is simultaneously not be willing put up with Sun Wukongâs bullshit while still legitimately respecting and admiring him. It makes for a nice duality in their relationship that most of his dynamics donât provide.
Fanon Rating: 10/10. The working dynamic is so fucking good to start with that Iâve never once seen fanon drop the ball. Never. This ship is always so fucking sweet and honest with Changâe calling out Wukong for his bullshit while never pushing it to the âShit on Sun Wukong Showâ levels that the fandom loves so much- she takes no shit, but does no harm. Sheâs supportive and acknowledges his traumas and fears. Wukong does his best for her. Moonstone shippers get an A+ and extra recess time.
Personal Enjoyment: 7/10. I just⌠I really like this one, dammit. Thereâs not a lot to go off of, but seeing fanworks that do not primarily treat SWK like living trash/baby the hell out of him is nice.
Lionpeach
Name Rating: 3/10. Again. Very boring and generic. Iâve seen Fuzzypeach which is a little cuter, at least. Still, itâs all the same âpeachâ+noun format.
Canon Rating: 3/10. The devotion Azure bears to Sun Wukong seems like it would bear a higher marking, but itâs shallow and flimsy. Azure never understood Wukong, never wanted what was best for him, never cared about his safety or happiness. Azure projects his beliefs and wants onto the people around him, blinding the big fella to shortcomings on their parts, and is delusional enough to never look inwards. Still, I can legitimately see
Fanon Rating: 0/10. Itâs just smut. Thatâs it. When it isnât itâs just âOoooh! Azure is jealous of Macaque! Tee-hee, sorry Azure!â and thatâs it. Iâve never actually seen any non-sexual, Azure-focused Lionpeach.
Personal Enjoyment: 5/10. Itâs a fun enough dynamic to explore, especially with how unhealthy it is. Iâll probably make a bot of this too one day. Maybe a âyandere dadsâ type. Or a mutual Primal Moon bot.
Celestialchaos
Name Rating: 10/10. Another not peach-based name is a win in my book!
Canon Rating: 6/10. Xiangliu is civil enough to Wukong (about as much as everyone else), but the mention of them having once been friends is what got my attention. Shrouded past + + potential reincarnation shenanigans + decently civil behavior = a very happy writer. Itâs so little but it makes my brain itch.
Fanon Rating: 0/10. It doesnât even exist babes ;( Iâm scrounging for water in the lonely plains of a desert yâall. Iâm a lonely little cactus and Celestialchaos is my annual three-inch rain.
Personal Enjoyment: 10/10. Câmon now. You all were expecting this. I love this ship. Iâve already made four chatbots. I love Xiangliu as a wild little freak who desperately tries to push Wukong away from other people and sad lonely Wukong finding refuge in a freaky toxic snake. Especially I like the idea of Xiangliu pitting himself against Macaque and going after Sun Wukong just to cause a little trouble, only to actually catch feelings and start pursuing him in earnest. I like âI want you at your worst so I can prove that I still love you even thenâ Xiangliu and âYou love me at all?â Wukong.
I really like this ship.
End Result
(Scores ranging from -40 to +40)
Shadowpeach= 1/40
(Past!Shadowpeach would around 20)
Lotuspeach= 7/40
Freepeaches= 16/40
Peachbuns= 11/40
Moonstone= 34/40
Lionpeach= 11/40
Celestialchaos= 26/40
#Time Talks#Lego Monkie Kid#LMK#Sun Wukong#Macaque#Ne Zha#Nezha#Ship Rating#Shadowpeach#Peachlotus#Freepeaches#Tangypeaches#Peachbuns#Moonstone#Lionpeach#Celestialchaos#If I left something out I either didnât wanna write about it or there wasnât enough content
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I remember hearing that Dana was inspired by True Crime, amongst other things and people IRL, when writing Belos. And it seems that contrary to the notoriety of True Crime fans, she actually understood the assignment.
Because she opted to demystify the serial killer as this dark, unusual psychology that operates outside of societal borders and rules, disturbed by some secret reason, and instead literally pull off the mask to reveal heâs just some white manchild who hates women and minorities to a violent degree, because he feels threatened by them and their ability to say No in his entitlement. Thereâs nothing special or unique about his motives.
Heâs no exception to the status quo, he is it unmasked of the veneer of civility, heâs the lynch mob and the cop (all of whom inherit the violence of white supremacy and colonialism) and fittingly a lot of serial killers were clocked by women and PoC as dangerous, but cops âlargely white menâ dismissed their claims because look at this dude, he seems like an upstanding citizen! And thatâs really how he got away.
And because his victims were people the system was less likely to believe because they both operated on the same biases, you see why a lot of cops who commit brutality are drawn to an institution where theyâre given violent power over brown and/or queer communities who are labeled as âsuspiciousâ, because they enjoy easy targets they know the system doesnât care about, and are enraged by body cams and accountability.
It doesnât matter if theyâre intentionally bigoted, their support of an inherently bigoted institution makes them the same; Internalized biases and âI donât see raceâ and all that. You see how Philip wanted to be a witch hunter âthe prototypical cop who is not exclusively violent towards women but still has a clear slantâ or colonial savior so bad, because his violence could be legitimized by the authority of the state.
He leans into it hardcore when he feels threatened by the presence of an outside girl who challenges the Christian narrative of Gravesfield, to the point of violence; Itâs a position that validates killing anyone who doesnât agree with him in general, hence Caleb and the Grimwalkers, but of course his and societyâs biases slant towards women and PoC. And while it ultimately doesnât matter whether heâs intentionally racist/misogynistic, itâs worth addressing that he very much does have the intention due to his blatant Conservative backdrop.
And seeing how charming Philip is and the portrayal of him as a little kid playing games in his youth, a perception Caleb mightâve still had which led to his death, I can see the direct line to families who find out their sons are school shooters and are in disbelief because he was such a nice kid! While ignoring the obvious Red Flags because white men are allowed to express these without being immediately scrutinized by the community, by having it brushed off. On some level cops donât suspect him because heâs the same type of guy as them.
Part of that denial comes from the fact that heâs not an âunfeeling sociopathâ whoâs wired differently. Philip can feel empathy and guilt like anyone else, but heâs still a hateful prick and these arenât mutually exclusive; Not when people can be perfectly selective about who they extend these feelings towards, or even do things in spite of these feelings, because other ones âanger and pride and hatredâ exist and they choose to prioritize those. Thereâs an assumption that empathy and guilt inherently make you a good person, but they donât; That ultimately comes from what you do about it, not how you feel.
You could even say Dana and the other writers wrote him too well, because true to life, we have a similar issue but on a micro-scale via the abstraction of fiction regarding a very dedicated fan base who loves to romanticize him and his actions, attributing his issues to some secret trauma in childhood, a young man failed by society! While also scrubbing him of his racism and misogyny and reliance on the status quo, to make him âapoliticalâ and you can see the same not just with fans but also in society.
Because society doesnât want to acknowledge serial killers as just the truth behind their white sons and the system that absolved and encourages them, because that would require them to admit their guilt in how theyâre structured. Rather, theyâll say these men reflect some dark truth inherent to humanity, and donât exist within a certain sociopolitical framework.
And so he was a âlonerâ whose problems can be pathologized via mental illness, his trauma can be traced back to a specific incident in his youth he just couldnât get over. So you see how school shooters are made into victims, how serial killers are also made apolitical and even alien to distance them from the status quo.
And then you can lean into how unusual they are by writing characters like Dexter or Hannibal Lecter, you can not just defend the system but feed into it via the commodification of their violence as entertainment and consumption, and thus fuel the white supremacy train by letting their violence towards women and minorities be praised as something fascinating and interesting and conveniently clean of bigotry. This is the dichotomy of the hypothetical, romanticized Fantasy Serial Killer, and the banal IRL Serial Killer.
Thus we have the same cycle of white menâs violence being praised and validated by the system, and white men feeling entitled to this fame as a delusional fantasy. Because youâve never heard of a black serial killer; Because black people are violent, thatâs just the way they are, right? But if white men are violent, this is sensationalized as somehow unusual and fascinating and worth dedicating countless books and shows and movies towards. Obviously.
And even going back to witch hunters, sometimes I wonder about the constant consideration of, What if witches did exist? What if they were evil? Things like The VVitch or The Conjuring series, which have some framing of the Salem Witch Trialsâ IRL violence towards women as legitimate in another universe, because of Satanismâs genuine predatory threat towards women, and how evil women sacrifice theirs or othersâ God-given gift of a child, and now threaten another white Christian family.
And again thereâs the the demystifying of the real life witch hunter too when we have a historical reenactment declare verbatim that IRL witch hunters were motivated by economics and other banal factors, not by any genuine belief in the dangers of demons; And even in a setting where the demons were real, they were not the predatory threat IRL witch hunters made them out to be, and so their very real biases and ulterior motives still apply in cumulative insincerity.
Hence, the Titan correcting Luz by explaining Belos as someone who only cares about being the hero in his own delusion; The fascist wet dream of a hidden invader here to corrupt even young white men, an outside monster to vanquish and whose destruction justifies the state, when in reality the monster IS the state, and before he was even presented as a witch (much less the human truth), his systemâs destruction was called for.
Ultimately, a lot of True Crime and similar narratives are criticized for focusing more on this apparently inevitable mystique behind the perpetrators, who warrant far more attention than their victims. So when the villain is an example of True Crime, itâs worth noting how the show is so much more focused on the âweirdoesâ he targets, on women and/or PoC. The lives of Luz Noceda and her friends, them getting along and their psychologies, are just so much more important, and it really isnât about that guy, who is informed as much as he needs to be.
But again, the True Crime fans dilemma; People genuinely salty at the show for not focusing on their favorite serial killer and his troubled backstory, his tragic motives and Puritan repression. The framing of his murders and motives isolated through the lens of his violence on undeserving white men, and not on the out-group he is specifically targeting and has committed much more violence on, esp if you look at the narrativeâs actual framing of his impact on our protagonists, but also other victims who are witches or demons, and even his own self-professed motives; Hence, âFratricide Georgâ as a joke depoliticized of his colonial violence, a violence that is not just adjacent to but fulfilling racism.
Because he hallucinated only those white men out of guilt, but thatâs his biased perspective and priorities; And so you see how this is contrasted with a refusal to empathize with people like the Collector or Luz, who are put into the same situations as his white male victims via shared cinematography, yet are just as rejected. Luz is only put into this situation as convenient to Belosâ narrative, the closest replacement to a white male human he can get, but again if this girl of color says No, he tries to murder her and even does.
Yet again, people take genuine, personal insult at the creator for finding Belos to be her least favorite character to write, while ignoring that she still found him necessary to the story she was trying to tell; She just found the framing and focus shouldâve been shifted to his actual victimsâ deep and meaningful lives, how they matter. So people hate that S3 cares more about Luz Nocedaâs relationship with her parents of color, as well as her female mentor and demonic brother, or her queer relationship with her girlfriend, etc.
And even when they get a bone of white boy Hunter, itâs still not enough; Fans inevitably gather themselves into an almost frenzied state of personal victimization, rallying into harassment of PoC who criticize their portrayal and discussion around their colonial serial killer fave, organizing dedicated trends and months to giving their white men the focus they âdeservedâ, because this is just White fandom in general.
Look at the entitlement campaigns regarding Ben Solo or Billy Hargroves deserving better, these young white men violent to women and minorities. Itâs just the same thing but on a micro-scale, at least filtered via fictional characters. But Jesus you see how internalized biases bleed into everything. Youâve never heard of a black serial killer and fandom doesnât fight for characters of color.
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I hate fandom drama but:
*Starts fandom drama*
Just saw someone very popular in a fandom that I'm in post this big huge rant about how no one is characterizing their fave character "correctly" in fanfic? And how its clear "Nobody who writes him has played his spinoff game!"
Its like
chill out.
It's fanfiction. Literally the nerdiest fucking thing worldwide. It is so 100% such a completely unserious way to spend our time?
We are all literally grown ass adults playing makebelieve with our favorite characters. We are smashing these fictional characters around like Barbies and making them do dumb stuff for our own amusement.
ITS FINE.
ITS LITERALLY FINE.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO CHARACTERIZE SOMEONE "PERFECTLY".God, you don't even have to write "good" fanfiction? You can literally just write total dogshit and post it and so long as it makes you happy thats fine??
Write bad fanfiction. Write dumb takes. Mischaracterize someone for fun. Make them do dumb shit they wouldn't do in canon. Write 100k words about two characters in different timelines doing shit that is literally impossible in canon. ITS FINE. LITERALLY NO ONE AT ALL IS BEING INJURED BY YOU WRITING MAKE BELIEVE SHIT.
ITS ALL FINE.
YOU'RE NOT BEING PAID TO DO THIS WHY WOULD YOU LISTEN TO SOMEONES SOUR ASS TAKE?? Especially on something you decided to dedicate your own time and effort to and post for free?? Radical self love is the future babes.
#JUST BE NORMAL#we are all in our thirties GO DO YOUR TAXES JESUS#sits back down and bangs on my keyboard like a chimp#not to be all âdon't like don't readâ but#it really is true#if a story someone writes bothers you that much#simply close your eyes and read something else#you are not paid to interact with anyone else in a space#nor is there any reward for interacting with their works besides the gift of reading something someone else wrote#the privilege of seeing something someone else drew#it is a privilege to get to read the fruits of someone elses efforts#and I think we need to understand that more#and appreciate that for what it is#i am privileged to get to read the stuff my friends write/draw#its is a lovely GIFT of dedication and time that I appreciate very much#and the idea that someone could sit down and consume that and read something that took a significant amount of effort and time#and then decide that it personally offends them not bc of the content but bc of some internal metric of what is ârightâ about#a little guy who just literally does not exist?#just does not sit right with me
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something i've been thinking about:
Wally is set up as a sort of "main character" by the whrp. he's said in the site's description of the show to have introduced the main theme/lesson of the day's episode, and then the rest of the neighbors join him on his escapades. but then we have our first glimpses of everyone's actual dynamics and characters through the audios and you look at Wally and its like
first of all, thats an npc. second, nearly everybody else has severe main character syndrome
but its fascinating how Wally is just kind of... There. he doesnt talk much. he doesnt contribute beyond a couple of lines. its more like he joins the others on their shenanigans. he fades into the background. he's off to the side while everyone else holds conversations & leads the moment
Wally, despite being described as Thee character, is borderline background.
& whats even more interesting, within his individual secret audio files and interactions - he's almost chatty. not only that but the way he talks is more confident and faster paced. he's taking initiative. he can be kinda pushy. when talking to the qa/whrp/Us, he acts more like the character his descriptions portray. he acts more like a person instead of a puppet waiting for his next cue
I cant tell if - when around the neighbors - his tepid milk behavior is a purposeful act or if he's masking. and if he's masking, is it deliberate or involuntary? and in regards to both, why is he acting so different? It could be tied to what he's trying to accomplish. if he's trying to "restore" Welcome Home, it would make sense for him to act as he does around the neighbors - he wouldnt want to clue them in that he knows so much more than he's letting on, would he?
but then that begs another train of thought - what if he isn't acting or masking? if there is a time discrepancy between Wally's interactions with the qa/whrp/Us & the more 'official' audios, that could explain the difference in behavior. we could be getting glimpses into "future" (read: current) Wally, who's had much more time to figure himself out since we can safely assume he started out as a blank slate. we could be seeing a more experienced Wally than the one seen with his friends.
of course that line of thinking loses some merit when considering the 14 "bug" audios. or it could lend to it... if we're seeing a more experienced Wally but his friends are only seeing what he allows them to. it's still him, just... a carefully curated version.
in general it could really tie into the themes of identity and change and being other, to me. when you're so different - or you feel so different - that you can't bring yourself to be your most authentic you around your friends. when you feel like you have to hold back and be who you think they expect you to be, or what would be most palatable. most normal. will they accept you as you really are? there's always the fear and terror that the people you consider closest to you won't. or when you're so scared of change that you'll shove down & lock away parts of yourself so that you can keep things as you are. because once they know you've changed, so will they. and really, do you want to even accept that you've changed? what if that's what scares you most of all - that you're different, you've metamorphosized, you can't go back to the way things were because you yourself are no longer the person you were before. there is no reversing this no matter how much you try or pretend
#its just so fascinating#the whrp: wally's The Guy!#wally (with his friends): the most lukewarm dude ever#then he's alone or alone with home and its like Hi My Name Is Wally Darling & Welcome To Jackass *off-tune guitar riff*#bbg has â¨problemsâ¨#and like - im giving all of his stuff a re-listen to make sure im not misremembering or completely talking out of my ass#but his phone call? the way his VA is delivering the lines seems So fuckign different than in the shared audios#his tone is flatter. he sounds more sure of his words and himself. he Sounds like he's in control and knows it.#immediately going from that to a shared audio where he puts more inflection in his voice & doesnt talk much#and when he does talk its slow. meandering. his lines are more befitting of his audience surrogate role#which only makes me feel more like he's acting/masking (again: if that time discrepancy does indeed exist)#which - as someone who kinda compulsively masks around Literally Everyone no matter how much i want to Not - it kinda hits hard!#i suspect that he Is masking instead of acting. he's The Most Autism as we all know so it would more than fit#and that could add an extra layer if it's automatic and he can't turn it off. or if he doesn't want to turn it off#but also acting... a misplaced attempt to protect his friends and world? not feeling like he can share his 'true' self? augh#wally darling you make me unwell. i want to dissect you#wh speculation#welcome home speculation#homebogging#and then listening to his little record audios#he starts out talking like he does in the shared audios and then slowly gains confidence until he's speaking more like he does in the call#just. wally not being talkative in the neighborhood to the point where everyone's like 'yeah wally isnt much of a talker'#vs him chatting away to the qa/whrp/Us#of course it could be because he has to carry the entire conversation on his own#But. but. you can still carry a one sided conversation and be hesitant or awkward or um. missing the word rn but short-sentenced#brief? succinct? concise?#wally's fully trying to make conversation with someone he knows can't reply. which is interesting#so many ways to take that. well. three#maybe he doesnt feel listened to in his day to day life / he feels more comfortable and can relax / hes been alone for a long while#anyway there may be more ways to take this but this is all my tiny poppyseed brain can reach atm
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I wanna know ur Fontaine msq criticisms đď¸đď¸đIâm all ears
I'm not sure if you wanted me to talk about this secretly or publicly but! Here I go!
The TLDR: Fontaine MSQ aestheticised prison, poverty, child abuse, the justice system/court and didn't properly address any of it.
More:
Focalors/Furina has way too much of a sympathetic angle for a dictator who's lets people drown with her inaction.
Neuvillette feels Bad for sentencing some people to death/prison, but that's it. He's one of the most powerful people in Fontaine. If he felt like there are systemic injustices, I.E sending an abused Child to prison, he should be the first person to DO something about it, not just cry and be sad so the audience can be like aw, that's complex character writing isn't it? No it's not! And guilt doesn't absolve you!!!!!!! (These are stuff we deal with in OTCOJ read my fic now /j)
Meropide has children in it, both Sentenced there (Wriothesley) and BORN THERE (Lanoire), and this is just a quirk of the place. Not only that, Meropide accepts prisoners of all genders and crimes. There are abusers and abuse victims in one place. Do you know how bad that is? How much potential for crimes to happen in a place like thatâ oh wait, Meropide isn't under Fontaine's jurisdiction. If you are assaulted as an inmate it literally means nothing to the court.
Wriothesley had no qualifications when he took over. Depending on how long he lived on the streets, how old he was when he killed his parents, how old he was when he was first taken in by the orphanage, etc, the man might never have more than 4â5 years of formal education. Sigewinne probably had to teach him how to write reports. And do Meropide's spreadsheets. Edit because I forgot to elaborate on this one: This isn't a point brought up anywhere, which is bad, because when poverty and incarceration robs you of a proper education (and the rights to vote in many places too, too, by the way), it reduces your prospects for jobs, reduces many people's ability to get a home etc etc. Wriothesley was just, narratively, Given his position.
Meropide is an industrialized prison, and they portray this as a good thing. Prisoners are paid in coupons for their labour, and this is also portrayed as a good thing.
The One-Meal-A-Day reform was something Paimon gushed about being so great of a perk, that people might want to go to jail for food (could be interesting and reflective of systemic poverty if MHY had brains, but they don't, so I was just Pissed because essentially all Paimon wanted to say was "Prison isn't so bad, but still don't go to prison guys! Prison labour is really hard!"). By the way, in most real-world prisons they are obligated to feed you three meals a day. Because that's how much food a human needs. MHY went with one meal just so they can say "if you want to eat more, you have to work." And then the welfare meal is a goddamn gacha. So imagine you're a starving child who's too weak to work in the fucking robot assembly line, and you wander up for your first meal in 24 hours, only to luck in with a shit one. I'd kill myself.
They wrote Wriothesley, who's a victim of the system, into a guy who's say shit like "I'm the Duke I can do whatever I want" for a cool moment where he choke-slams an inmate (I know he was a bad guy. But also, in copaganda when cops are violent/disregarding protocols, they are always only portrayed to do that against bad guys, so what does our critical thinking tells us about this one?) They wrote Wriothesley, who was an inmate of a prison so bad, so notorious that it is the literal boogeyman of Fontaine, that has a legal (???) fighting pit, with an administrator who abuses his position to be unreasonable, to willingly stay in the place and become an Administrator who would choke-slam an inmate while saying a cool line about how he has the power to do whatever he wants. They wrote him, the guy who had to be fed on the streets by melusines, to think one-meal-a-day was a good enough reform (while he spends god-knows how much on his boat). This wasn't a victim-turns-into-abuser narrative either, they want all this to be seen as positive character growth.
And then, the final kicker is, they gloss over his entire abuse. You can only read about these shit in his profile, which most people don't because they don't Have Him or doesn't care to unlock it/read it online, and they jammed his entire backstory into a flaccid info-dump at the end of his character story quest. This man isn't Allowed to feel abused and neglected and show any reaction to it within the narrative of Fontaine itself, because if they actually Gave Weight to what happened to him, they'd have to confront THE FUCKING JUSTICE SYSTEM they had NO PLANS on criticising. I don't think they ever explicitly said the fucking Crime-Theatre nonsense was Bad either.
I could go on, but this is already so long. But yeah, I hope this gave you an idea.
#and then. and im putting my most controversial opinion in the tags bc im scared lmao. but like... then... you have the fans..... doing......#the same fucking thing.#the amount of times I have seen Wriothesley used as just a side prop for Neuvillette to feel bad about shit. While Wriothesley is just.....#portrayed as having the inner peace and acceptance of a fucking monk. I was shocked when I read some fics I swear#they really said this man has no trauma at all! the stuff in his past? he's over it!#i hate that passivity when writing victims. like ok if One is written like that#sure. but MHY write all their victims like this#I mean look at fucking Lanoire#and Neuvillette sentenced him to prison after he killed his parents who were never confronted by the law. That's canon.#that's more canon than WRLT itself.#why weren't they confronted? did wriothesley try to talk to someone about it? why did he feel like killing them is his only option ?????#at least have there be some sort of conflict and friction there. How does Wriothesley feel about the court and Neuvillette when#this is the literal system that allowed all that shit to happen to him in the first place???#are you Sure he won't be at least a little wary? the fact that some people think he's Grateful to Neuvillette or even idolises him is crazy#because the man literally subjected him to prison. and if you want to portray his prison life as easy breezy and trauma free#you undermine his entire shitty little 'prison reform' narrative#and if you think he'd be completely 100% accepting of the justice system. Then why the fuck would he kill his parents himself#don't you see that the whole 'I'll accept whatever sentence in order to kill my parents' thing in itself is an act of defying the system#and I Hate#this idea. about being some of the most powerful men in the nation. and yet they can't fucking TRY to set up a better system or smth#i can't believe I read a fic where leaving starving street kids croissants is the most they (the characters and the writer) want to do#like. what the fuck. the whole point of that scene is just to make neuvillette feel bad and be like aw......... poor people exist.... OK???#this is literally how MHY would portray him though.... tbf..... This is what ppl would argue as 'in character'#I just think the character they're in is bad.#I will say I'm giving the fic a lot of grief. there's more to the scene than that. and. ultimately.....#fanfic is (saying this through gritted teeth) ........ recreational....................and free........... in the end.................#i dont think this is reflective of the writer. I do think it is reflective of the way the canon material (genshin impact)#presents in the audience who consumes it. most fans only want these guys to fuck anyway. not think about systemic injustices#canon doesn't make it about the systemic injustices either so why should we. the aesthetic of slums and prisons are just there for fun guys#IM JUST CRAZY OK. I SHOULDNT EVEN BE HERE THIS IS NOT FOR ME . I DONT CARE THAT MUCH FOR PEOPLE FUCKING AND I CARE TOO MUCH
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every other poster on the tube right now is advertising a new musical called âthe time travellerâs wifeâ. for a blissful moment i forgot that a âwifeâ is something that a heterosexual woman can be, and, believing it to be a beautiful lesbian tale akin to tihylttw, decided to google the synopsis to see if it was worth checking out. big mistake. âman first encounters his future spouse as a young girl, returns to kiss her at 18 and marry her in the future, remaining the same age as barely any time passes for him meanwhile she spends years alone pining for her distant angelâ blinks. what does that remind me of. oh yeah apparently this came before. iâm already suffering through series 5 at the current moment, so, plenty enough of that for years to come, thank you, andâ what a surpriseâ the novel the musicalâs based on was a primary inspiration for you-know-whoâs weird fixation on this particular plotline. the worst part about the time travellerâs wife is that there arenât even any cool steampunk clockwork droids or gorgeous 18th century french dresses to make up for the vomit-inducing implications. i have never been more disappointed. mind wipe, now
#in hindsight itâs funny how enamoured i was with tgitf when i first watched it. because i had in my inexperience considered it original and#clever. instead of a rehashed version of a story that already exists and is just as awful when you think about this âromanceâ for over 2#minutes. and then he does it AGAINNN#babe wake up itâs beating steven moffat with hammers monday#so this is where the poison root spread from. iâm going back in time to erase the novel from existence so he never reads it. come up with#better ideas. also leave little girls alone#i still love tgitf but only for the reasons above. the aesthetic and the scifi aspect. and the tragedy i GUESS. kinda because for reinette#itâs a tragedy but for ten itâs literally like. five hours max#do you think he didnât come back for her on purpose? he couldnât bring her along because she was too important a historical figure? he left#her there despite promising to pick her up in five minutes. knowing full well she would be gone before he heard of her again#i bet he did that deliberately. had to keep her living in hope because he couldnât refuse her but he couldnât take her out of her own life#wow this post veered somewhere else entirely. sorry guys#doctor who#dw#the girl in the fireplace#the time traveler's wife#jamie.txt
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Fuck the cringe. Begone thot
I'm literally tomura (source mha) and bodily a crow (gryphon) in outerworld.
I'm not that similar to my source, and I don't identify with the name Shigaraki so I'm just Tomura lol. But I'm still Tomura, which is very cringe and 'lmfao you think you're a fictional character' and yes you're right. It's true. And I ask you, so? What's your point?
Life is too short to be your own bigot to your literal identity that you can't even control. I mean, being your own bigot to any part of your identity, even if its controllable, is dumb. Its extra dumb to try to change if it wasnt even voluntary because you can't. -t
#terrorpunk#terrorpunk is a big inspiration to us (midwinter)#we never could even imagine we'd just be content and happy to exist as who we are#it's a huge contribution to us accepting we were plural and all of us#especially Lillian (he hates my guts but fair bro) who is scary. Yes#I won't lie in our experience#plurality is terrifying#mostly to us. But we assume it would sound insane to a singlet if we told them there was a little guy who punishes#Me and Mikhail and s/hs the body because I wouldn't acknowledge him#And punishes me so bad I want to kill myself and think it's my idea.#But yeah Lilian is still a person who hurt a lot and he thinks what he does is just. And he should be treated#Like a person#Not a mistake or a stain on the earth for existing. Which is how he felt in his homeworld for centuries.#It must have been horrible for him to be treated like that by the past fronter who#Didn't even want to talk to him#Just wanted to kill him and deny he existed at all#Anyway#Yeah#I'm a literal anime character#Outerworld experiences and outerworld trauma is taken away#we're a norse god lol#Written by midwinter#Thanks terrorpunk
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thinking gabriel thoughts (again)
#the guy who cut down minos without a second thought is the same guy who was the only angel to care about the ferrymen. fucking dies#his terminal entry literally says hes popular in heaven because of his radiant personality. he does nothing but insult v1 in 3-2#get you a man who can do both#minos swears revenge on him while the ferryman literally worships him.#the skeleton in 1-4 who is worshipping him even after their life is long gone and the mural in 4-3 with traitor written over it#he looms over the narrative even when hes not there#he encourages even those in hell to Be Good and Have Faith but destroyed minos for trying to make a better life#different characters have extremely different views of him and all of them make sense!#heaven's specialest little boy can be hell's worst nightmare. as a treat#i also think about minos a lot by extension#i was just chilling on the wiki when i got hit with the 'he thought it unreasonable that people were punished for loving' and cried#like even as someone whos aroallo. it got to me!#it also raises the question of how much homosexuality is part of that. to me#is heaven ultrakill homophobic. discuss#i mean they do have Major bisexual lighting. in lust.#yeah sure theyre in hell hell is eternal punishment but he really was just. trying to make a peaceful existence#also the sisyphean insurrectionist lore fucked me up a little#ultrakill on the surface looks so simple but then you open up the wiki and its 'yeah the ferrymen tore their own flesh off their bones'#'king minos attempted to make a peaceful civilization in the lust layer and was killed for it but he lingered bc hes op'#'yeah actually the sisyphean insurrectionists are like that because the angels took away everything they didnt need for the punishment'#and you just have to live with that information now. you wont go back to blissful ignorance. you cant.#or thats just on me for taking lore too seriously. v1 doesnt care
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Theyâre calling my baby Gojo, Joseph Joestar now
#rambling#the diff is that Gojo did apologize after being called out and face to face with his racism whilst Joseph literally befriended naziâs đľâđŤ#and there was never any explanation from araki as to why heâd even wrote German soldiers in the shit in the first place like that was#absolutely jarring as hell to read for the very first time back when Iâd gotten into jjba#well I watched it first but you know#like Joseph really thought fondly of Stroheim as this stand up guy even though heâs first of all#a Nazi#and second#the first scene that we were introduced to was of him sexually harassing a Woman#itâsâŚâŚ. đż#still to this day I wonder if araki had ever addressed this because lord#Joseph was just happy to get the help I guess but that felt so ooc for him from what heâd seen đŁď¸#happily receiving the help of a Nazi and calling them a nice guy ahhh Joseph-#Gojo would never sjjsaj#my boo boo is a little prejudice but heâs working on it đŁď¸#I still think that gege was trying to have a âracism is badâ moment but again#the execution was pretty awkward and it felt out of place considering what had been currently going down in the manga#like the Racism was pretty random but it was swiftly put to a stop which I can appreciate even if it shouldnât have been a point of#conversation to begin with since why couldnât Miguel just exist as a character instead of him being the now token negro#who everyone sees as instantly more frighteningly powerful than everyone else like this didnât even need to be brought up wllssldk#idk gege was trying to be âwokeâ đ. sorry nbs and wp ruined the term for me but like basically lol#gojoâs pretty intelligent and extremely gifted but heâs never been perfect lol#itâs just that idk why gege chose to talk about antiblackness in Japan out of nowhere about the only black character on screen hehhhhhh#like gege tried but lmfao#this is so funny to me#at least it didnât drag on putting Miguel in an even more awkward situation than he already was and it was nipped in the bud quickly#Gojo isnât one to dwell on things but when heâs face with new information and is taught something he does try to reflect and do better and#Iâm sure he probably started to become even more aware of what heâs saying especially when talking to Miguel in an honest way since thatâs#always been the kind of character who he was despite the horrors#the only ppl whoâve been kinda annoying about this are nbs and white people as always đż
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concerned mother voice: what happened to little miss perfect you guys used to love little miss perfect
#j remembered the existence of tht song#did the toh fandom j move on or did i j loose touch w all the toh fans i knew that were obsesed w it. that is thee question.#it was so popular tho like i remeber being kinda annoyed tht it was seen as offical property of the toh fandom#bc i always associated it w glinda who it does rly fit to be fair i think#also i remember *saying* it was a julia song but i dont beleive tht. it was just my way of going 'hey guys remember cs' to my friends#who had moved onto toh#i actually think that like. thts so evil actually bc like. literally just bc of the 'what? its totally platonic!' line#like no dont do that to carulia leave them alone. good carulia characterization that doesnt peg them as 'oblivious' get behind me.#i want to keep posting abt tht btw i was to open ppls eyes to how characterizing carulia like that is bad#amd like just removes the good dynamic they canonically have which is so much more interesting omfg !!!!#tbh sometimes i feel like ppl ships that way so that another character can point out all the moments they were 'soo obviously in love'#so its like playing a highlight reel of their most in love moments which is ig fair that thts smth you wanna do#but why not do smth like theyre reminiscing on their relationship tht wont have u dismiss their dynamic. yk?#sorry obvs tht cahracterization isnt always inacurate but for carulia it sure as hell is.#anyway. chess if ur reading this go listen to little miss perfect actually and tell me if it fits ur werewolf cheerleader character bc idk#but maybe it will !!! is she hiding being a lesbian or just being a werewolf.#flappy rambles
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ACTUALLY. IM NOT DONE WITH MY HENRY AND WILLIAM RANT. listen to my ramble boy
#[ren]#somethijng somethijng they are the definition of idolization and the harm it does#everytime we hear henry speak he is always talking bad about william (except for the first two tapes) and everytime we hear william speak-#-about henry he always praises him to the high heavens#from the DAY he knew henry existed he has basically worshipped that guy. he followed him around and he fell for his little acts hook line-#-and fucking sinker!!#and henry Does Not Care About Him#i need to state that#HE DOES NOT. FUCKING CARE ABOUT HIM.#HE COULD NOT GIVE LESS OF A FUCK ABOUT THIS LANKY BITCH#AND YETTTTTT#WILLIAM PERSISTS !!!!!!!!!!!!!#even in jacks rant in dsaf 3 he mentions it!!#dave DOES NOT get over henry#whether he doesnt want to or if he just CANT he DOES NOT get over him#his soul might sure sure whatever . but william??????? william 'named himself after henrys dead son' afton?????????????#DAVE cannot let go. WILLIAM let go after like forty years and its only because he literally KILLED HIM#anyway#i think its really interesting that reality-dave (the guy who named himself after henry) is obsessed with henry while william (the guy who-#-literally fucking killed henry) is able to let go and (quite literally) move on
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boys are just . not real
#Kayla's personal life#they don't exist they're just silly little things made up in fairytales for silly little dumb dumb sad girls#like . is it really that much to ask for someone like me#i just want a boy that can keep up . i feel like i'm always the one with the fun outfits/hair and the ENFPness and the tooniness but like#why is it that i barely see this kind of extroversion and effort in guys#i feel like societally#ya can't walk outside without tripping and falling over women who have these qualities and it's probably bc we're socialized to be this way#but does that mean i'm just doomed to look for a person i statistically won't find because this socialization is rarer done in guys?#sarah lynn voice Am I doomed are you doomed are we all doomed#anyway i wasted another night on okcupid feeling literally nothing LOL#i could work on my new screenplay idea but idk whether it should be the short film horror or the sequel to the one i jsut finished#but either way it won't feel like much so#i'm allowed to overshare tonight your mom said i could
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I am so utterly fascinated by âSakiâ, the 18-year-running mahjong manga in which you, the reader, become gradually, frog-boilingly aware (over the course of nearly two decadesâ worth of mahjong tournaments) that none of these girls are wearing underwear and most of their boobs are slowly expanding.
I need you to understand that I have, like, an anthropological level fascination with this comic. From the perspective of someone who is also a comic artist and writer, two things delight me about it:
the fact that I understand completely how an artist gets from âthe fans can have a little hint of skirted asscheekâ to âthe pussy is completely out on center pageâ over the course of 18 years; and
the way in which the pussy being out is treated by the characters and diegesis as being utterly unremarkable.
Okay. Point 1. The frog-boiling.
Let me put this in perspective for you. There was already a meme about how the characters in âSakiâ donât wear underwear when I was in middle school. I am thirty now. Okay? And itâs still going.
In the time since, this has stopped being a joke. It is now indisputable canon. This is not because anyone outright says it at any point. Itâs because the underwear ran out of places to hide. Iâm obsessed with this thought: somewhere in the over 20 volumes of âSakiâ, there is a panel in which underwear was objectively deconfirmed. And it would be so hard to figure out where that panel actually is. Maybe the artist didnât even realize it when she drew it! The frog? Boiling!!
And of course there is also the breast expansion. I donât know how to put a spin on this. They are just expanding. Like, this happens a lot with artists: you define a character as being, in your mind, âthe one with the big boobsâ, and over the years you emphasize that trait further and further so that the signal doesnât get lost in the noise. Itâs just that normallyâin like a wildly popular manga series about mahjong published by literally Square Enix, for exampleânormally there would be a point at which the boobs stopped getting bigger. Like, an editor would step in or something. Or you would get to the point where you cannot draw the character in the same panel as her mahjong tiles without her breasts spilling over the tiles, and youâd go, âWell, this is now untenable.â
That did not happen. There is no ceiling. The frog is soup.
Point 2. The complete and utter mundanity of all of this.
Itâs like this, okay: thereâs no shortage of trashy ecchi manga out there. Thereâs a million other comics doing wildly bawdier things with wildly more improbable bishoujos.
The vibe with âSakiâ is different.
Itâs hard to explain this, but it feels like the world of the comic is fundamentally uninterested in the fanservice happening on the page. I cannot describe it as âleeringâ, because I cannot conceive of a person in the story from whose point of view one would leer. I think the artist is probably into itâI canât imagine anyone is making her do thisâbut âSakiâ the comic has no opinion on the matter.
There are essentially no male characters in âSakiâ. Like, there was one guy? Kind of? At the very beginning? But he is gone now. They put him back in the toybox. He does not exist. It appears to be some level of canonical that in the world of âSakiâ, almost all humans are women. Those women are sometimes romantically into each other. According to comments the artist has made on Twitter (which I cannot source), they have lesbian baby technology, so itâs no problem. Itâs so much not a problem that the story is about mahjong, instead of any of that.
So, like, the fiction here appears to be this: this is the, like, meta-narrative of the fanservice of âSakiâ, right: itâs just normal that they donât wear underwear and their boobs are arbitrarily big. Itâs been normal. It was normal before the story of the manga began. Itâs just how things are. Nobody bats an eye about it, and if they do, itâs in sort of a lesbian kind of way so like whatâs the problem, we love lesbians here. This is literally normal for girls.
The fanservice simply diffuses into this all-encompassing aura of disembodied, ambient sluttiness. The framing of the panels demands you acknowledge it, and the story demands you already be over it, because itâs mahjong time now, and weâre playing mahjong.
Do you get??? why Iâm so fascinated??? Are you not a little enraptured???
Anyway, I have no idea how to end this weird post. I guess the conclusion is that women stay winning????
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Im going to destroy the earth
#theres a beautiful megane transgender woman with pink hair and glasses Just realised I said glasses twice Whatever she has glasses ans shes#inside my nintebdo switch. and sheâs my girlfriend#WHAT IF I DESTROYED THE SOLAR SYSTEM#FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK#THE WHITE DAY LINE WHAT IF I [REDACTED FOR PUBLIC HESLTH AND SAFETY] im ok#oh my god my model girlfriend with pink hair and glasses who lives in my Nintendo switch oh my god#uuaauaygg. UAUAUYGGHHGB#im gonna kill the earth#why does nanatsumori minoru exist#why the78$1)8&)&$/#(sick in the head) Why is she literally the cosplayer girlfriend that coomer otaku guys want who like surprises you by ordering a sexy bunny#costume and greeting u when u come home from work What if I destroyed the earth#IM GOING TO THROW UP IM SEEING STARS whatever Iâm normal itâs fine#the destructive power of the white day line did nothing to me. im ok. whatever#throws up blood a little#tokimemo
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DPXDC prompt. Dead on main. Someone who knows you better than you know yourself.
Perhaps Fentons are not able to recognize their child, despite the fact that they hunt him day after day. But for childhood friends, who saw each other in absolutely ridiculous situations that parents are never allowed to know about, just one sneeze and a bored sigh is enough to realize that this weirdo fighting next to him is the same guy with whom you tasted soap and then stood looking at each other from different corners and giggling.
And so, the dialogue after the battle with the creatures of Infinite Realms, to which Constantine had to invite a potential ally not yet approved by the League:
Phantom: Well, mom always said you were bad news...But a crime lord, seriously? What happened to your plans to become a literature teacher? Red Hood: Hey! For Gotham, this is a very high-paying in-demand job. And I don't want to hear anything from Casper. At least I have my own business. What kind of part-time job do you have? Are you selling sheets to your buddies from this green goo? Phantom: This is ectoplasm. And they're not my friends, and anyway⌠Constantine: King Phantom, do you know Red Hood? Phantom: Do I know him? Ha! This street rat was Splinter of my beginnings until my family moved out of Gotham.
Red Hood: Wait, wait a minute. Phah...Holy shit. I thought I was the best example of what it means to be a disappointment to a family, but you beat me here. Oh, man, only you...The ghost king who is the son of the ghost hunters? Seriously? Hahah! I thought your rebellious phase ended the moment you told your father that you wanted to be an astronaut and not inherit the family business.
Danny*groans and covers his face with his hands*: My life is over.
Red Hood: Literally~ No, of course I always knew that your parents' disregard for safety in the laboratory would someday kill someone, but I didn't really expect this? Like, wow⌠Phantom: What makes you think it was an incident in the lab? I mean, there are so many possibilities around. It's ridiculous andâŚhah Red Hood: Dude, look me straight in the face and tell me I'm wrong if you dare. Phantom:âŚFuck you, stupid bookworm. Red Hood: Stubborn nerd. Phantom: Red bucket! Red Hood: Pale toadstool! Nightwing: Um, can you guys please stop fighting? Red Hood: What are you talking about? This is how we always communicate. Phantom: Yeah! Well, in our defense, my sister always thought we both could use a therapist. Oh, man, he made me lose my train of thought. Where were we, J? Red Hood: Since when are you able to think? And I complimented your new hair and skin color. Phantom: Right, right⌠But, hey, not all of my parents' hypotheses really have a right to exist, and you know it! Hm, did I mention that you're built like a fridge and how does this leather jacket suit you? Red Hood: I believe not. And who's talking about your parents' work? You were an airhead when you were alive too to be honest. And as I see it, not much has changed. Why the hell are you still starting a fight with puns? Stop telling your opponent your position. This is terribly stupid! Phantom: Oh, please, these ghosts are definitely not a threat to me. What's wrong with having a little fun? The fact that you don't have weapons to handle something stronger than a blob ghost is your problem not mine, loser. But let's get back to our greetings. Red Hood: Sure. Then listen hereâŚ
~~~~~
Nightwing: Jay, why didn't you say right away that you knew Phantom? We've wasted so much time wondering if it's worth summoning him, and you just stood there and said nothing. Red Hood: PfffâŚBecause I didn't know that until today. He used to be human. And we haven't seen each other for a long time. So how was I to know that he would take such a ridiculous pseudonym? Nightwing: Then why the hell didn't you feel worried about teasing this creature? Red Hood: Why should I? It's just Danny.
~~~~
Tucker: Oh man, 84 murders, attempts to kill Joker and to much fights with Batman and Black Mask and⌠Danny: Yeah, yeah. It's all very interesting, but it's not what I asked you to find. Get to the point, Tucker. What I will wear to our dinner tonight depends on this. Tucker: Seriously? As far as I'm concerned, whether he's single or not is less important than all this shit. Aren't you afraid to show up at his house? Danny: I'm invited. And for that matter, I'm Amity Park's former public enemy number one. Which one of us should be worried, hah? So he's not dating anyone, right? Don't try to distract me. Tucker: Dude! Danny: Ugh, in my experience, when he acts like he's lost his mind, he usually has good reasons for it. And if not, given some of the events of my alternative future, I have no right to judge him, soâŚ
#dpxdc#dpxdc prompts#dpxdc crossover#dpxdc prompt#dcxdp#dead on main#dead on main ship#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc prompt
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Custody Battle
You know those AUs when Black Adam finds out about Billy being a kid, so he wants to adopt him? Letâs explore a different aspect of that. People think Marvel and Adam are the dads of Mary Marvel, and a kid named Billy, who might potentially be Junior. People also think theyâve been going through a messy divorce.
Marvel: âHow many times do I have to tell you? I- Uh Billy, wonât be going to Kahndaq with you!â
Black Adam: âIf I throw in the girl, will you let me then?â
Marvel: âWho? Mary?â
Black Adam: âYes, her. If Iâm correct, sheâs also a child.â
Marvel: âWha? Still no! Throwing her in made the deal worse!â
People are thinking Marvel isnât letting Adam see their kids. People are also wondering how the two had kids, how long theyâve been married, and why it took them so long to divorce. I mean, the two had been throwing each other into buildings long before Adam wanted custody of the kids.
Black Adam: âBeing the Wizardâs Champion is too much for you, Batson.â
Marvel: âIt is not.â *sassy man eye roll*
As a result of this conversation, the public now thinks two things, one, that Marvel is neglecting his kids due to his work as a hero, or as the Wizardâs Champion. Whatever that means. The thing is though, it isnât completely surprising because this is gonna be connected this to the âCap not Caringâ post. (In that post, Mary and Billy threaten to kill each other, while Billy fights Freddy)
Marvel: âI donât want that man around Mary.â
Reporter: âAnd Billy.â
Marvel: *confused* âWhat?â
Reporter: âAnd Billy. Mary and Billy.â
Marvel: âOh, yeah, and Billy.â
Yeah, people did not like that, because how do you just forget your son exists? To be fair though, Billyâs son is himself. Can you blame him? Too bad that isnât common knowledge. Theyâre also flaming him for his âpreferenceâ for Mary.
The second thing people think is that Marvelâs name is Batson? People do some digging and find out about C.C.. Billy is now officially his own dad. Now, at the prospect of a child getting potentially kidnapped, or at least having to undergo forced family bonding, some other heroes grew a little concerned.
Marvel: âGuys heâs not getting Billy. I donât know why he thinks heâs getting Billy. Heâs not. I donât know why he would think he has a choice when the only times heâs been in Billyâs life were to literally ruin it.â
Superman: *extremely concerned* âWhat..?â
Marvel: âI know right?â
Batman: âWhy does Adam now suddenly want Billy?â
Marvel: âCause he found something out he shouldnât have.â
Batman: âWhat did he find out?â
Superman: âWhy was a grown man beefing with a child in the first place?!â
Marvel swiftly dodged all the questions by walking away as Clark called after him.
Bonus:
The two get taken to reality court tv.
Marvel: *when itâs his turn to speak* âJury and judge, he killed his nephew.â *points to Adam*
Jury and Audience: *gasps*
Marvel: âWhoâs to say he wouldnât kill Billy?â
Black Adam: âIâm a changed man now.â
Judge: *glares at Adam for interrupting*
Marvel: âLast week, you slammed me so hard into the ground I ended up in the sewers.â
Black Adam: âThat was before, this is now.â
Judge: *bangs gavel* âMr. Adam! Mr. Marvel is speaking. Refrain from interrupting.â
Black Adam: âWhoâre you to tell me that?â
Judge: âThe damn judge.â
Audience and Jury: *collective oohs and aahs*
#billy batson#dc captain marvel#captain marvel dc#shazam#fawcett comics#fawcett#fawcett city#black adam#teth adam
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