#a hopeful ending I guess

[strayheartless]

Anti-Hero: an ASGZC angst ficlet:

**A/N: I’m back at torturing Cloud again! This time by poking at his negative self talk and intrusive thoughts! If that’s triggering maybe give this one a miss! Also ⚠️trigger warning ⚠️ for panic attacks and Cloud having some issues with food (no ED but he’s depressed and struggling appetite loss), also I have highlighted a perceived possible power imbalance, but I want to make it clear that ASGZ take their power relation to Cloud seriously and rank does NOT get brought into the relationship.**

“It’s me, hi. I’m the problem it’s me. At tea time everybody agrees. I’ll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror. It must be so exhausting always rooting for the Anti-Hero.” -Taylor swift, Anti-Hero

***

Cloud stirs his spoon through the soup Angeal has very kindly spent all afternoon cooking. It’s good, great even, it’s just a shame Clouds appetite abandoned him at the beginning of the week. He’d make up for it once he’s got his head on straight he promises himself, but right now he really can’t face eating all that much.

As he looks up through the hair curtaining his face he see’s his ridiculously beautiful boyfriends chat easily back and forth, swapping anecdotes about work or missions they’ve been on. Cloud has nothing to add. His job is seriously lacking in interesting anecdotes compared to actual first class SOLDIERS. If he opened his mouth to speak he knew he’d only be met with polite smiles and internal cringing on his own part.

He was nothing compared to these literal gods among men. Sometimes it was enough to make him feel like a mako monster sat at a dinner party. You could put lipstick on a wererat but that didn’t change the fact it was a rabid animal.

He looked back down again, trying desperately to convince himself to at least swallow a spoonful. Anything to let Angeal know the food was appreciated. Next to him, Zack laughed easily and slid an arm across the back of clouds chair; his own soup demolished.

“There’s no way you let them get away with anything less than Latrine duty!” He pressed, and Cloud realised he had no idea what the conversation was about… he’d zoned out too hard.

“Oh I had them on worse than that!” Genesis replied, and Zack lifted his hand off of the chair back to scratch at Clouds nape. “I’ve court martialed men for less.”

“You’ve set men aflame for less” Sephiroth pointed out.

The hand in Clouds hair felt like too much. The conversation was grating at him for no reason. For one horrifying second Cloud felt a yell well up in his throat before he stamped it down viciously and tried to wrestle his expression into something attentive.

He moved forward just a touch making Zack’s hand fall lazily between his shoulder blades, in a move that seemed like he was simply leaning into his own bowl. Zack at least, didn’t seem to notice or catch the discomfort in his face. Instead he mildly watched Cloud shove his spoon into his mouth and force himself to swallow.

The soup tried to force its way back up in protest but Cloud swallowed hard against the feeling. He would not make himself look like more of a fool than he already was.

How could he think he belonged here? How could he think he could possibly date these men who had achieved more in one year then Cloud was capable of in a lifetime. How could he simply sit here and play at being anything more than what he was… a lesser being.

Cloud wanted to push himself away from the table and run. Just throw open the door and go find a nice cave to hole up in. Maybe in twenty years time he could re-emerge and pretend he’d never tried to be more than he was.

His hands started shaking, the spoon falling from his grasp and making a loud clattering sound against the rim of the plate.

He was having a panic attack.

Shit.

“Cloud?” Angeal was looking at him with his beautiful mako ringed eyes. Cloud could hear his own breath trying to break his chest cavity open. He grasped at the neck of his t’shirt frantically trying to claw it away from his throat. It felt like he was being choked.

Every eye in the room was on him. Genesis had placed his wine glass on the table; Sephiroth’s hand on his arm, having apparently silently pulled his attention to Clouds pathetic display. Zack was leaned forward and rubbing at Clouds back.

“Stop!” Cloud cried out. “Stop! Stop touching me I- I can’t,” he panted and Zack pulled his and away fast, giving a placating apology.

“Darling,” Genesis spoke soft but firm. “You need to breath,”

Oh, Cloud wanted to throw something at him. He wanted to spit in Gen’s face and rage that he didn’t have the perfect control that they did. Instead he pressed the heel of his hand into his breast bone and leaned heavily against the table top. The feeling in his chest was getting worse, the elastic band on his lungs tightening.

Angeal, slipped deftly off of his chair and knelt to the side of Clouds own, taking the hand that was curled, white knuckled, against the edge of the table.

“Here,” he murmured, placing Clouds hand against his own chest. “Follow my breathing,”

Angeal took a deep breath in, held it and then let it out slowly. He kept up a steady stream of reassurances as he did so, making sure Cloud knew he was safe and that the attack would pass.

“Good, you’re doing so good Storm Cloud,”

The pet name was something Angeal had picked up from Claudia last time they’d visited Nibelheim, and much to Clouds outward irritation, but inward pleasure, he’d started using it at home too. It had a pretty settling affect on Cloud, as his brain registered the name as something safe. Something innocent.

“That’s it,” the ravenette cooed. “Easy does it, there you go.”

Once the immediate danger of passing out had passed, Cloud tried to pull himself into the smallest ball possible on the uncomfortable dining room chair. He tucked his feet just under his butt and wrapped his arms around his knees, hiding his face between them.

Was he ever not going to embarrass himself in front of them? He guessed not.

“Sunshine, what’s going on?” Zack was touching him again. Just a light touch of his finger tips to Clouds elbow, but it felt more grounding then before.

“Imtoomuchofawasteofspacetobedatingallofyouanditmakesmewanttocraoutofmyskin,” Cloud didn’t lift his head or try to enunciate properly. The exhaustion had made his accent thicken and his brain feel like it was filled with treacle. It was seeping out of his ears.

“I’m sorry, we don’t speak mumble.” Genesis ribbed lightly.

“Gen,” Angeal said warningly.

“Cloud, you need to speak clearly. If we can’t understand we can’t help” Sephiroth said in place of Genesis’ retort.

Cloud looked up a little and whispered “you shouldn’t be dating me.”

“Oh for goddess sake!”

“Genesis!” Angeal warned sharply this time. He turned his attention back to Cloud. “Baby why would you think that?”

Next to him, Zack had made a pained sound and pulled Clouds chair closer to him so he could wrap his arms around the smaller man. It didn’t feel as overwhelming this time, but it also didn’t feel deserved.

Cloud shrugged helplessly. “I just feel like I’m some kind of broken monster dressed up like a real person… I don’t feel like I can match up to what you guys are,”

The sentence hung in the air between them like a loaded gun. They were all aware of how their individual ranks within Shinra effected their relationship with Cloud.

Between the four firsts it wasn’t such an issue. Sure there was a hierarchy to follow while at work but that got left at the door. They were all first class. They all were working at similar levels.

With Cloud it was different. He was Infantry and while he may have been working towards third class with more clear cut success this time, it didn’t change the fact that they were operating at a very different level.

There were things, information, they were all privy to that Cloud was not authorised to know. Conversations that had to be cut short when he entered a room. It was incredibly isolating to be on the outside of that while pretending to be in a fair and equal relationship.

“You surpass us all darling,” Genesis leaned over the table and placed his hand on Clouds.

“I don’t. I’m not even a SOLDIER…”

“And what does that matter? You are strong in other ways. Besides, with all the work we’ve put into you these bast months and then knew research on mako sensitivity you are sure to pass.”

Clouds frown deepened.

“Don’t you feel used? Like I’m just using you to achieve my goals?”

It was Sephiroths turn to roll his eyes impatiently.

“Are you?” He asked

“No! Bu-“ Seph cut him off.

“Cloud getting into SOLDIER is not about how you utilise the resources available to you. It’s about your physical ability. We could put all the effort in the world in you and it wouldn’t matter if you didn’t meet the requirements,” he said, “you are not using us, and we would not let ourselves be used. Zack can tell you himself that his progression into SOLDIER was mostly possible because of Angeal.”

Zack huffed in amusement. “Hate to admit it spikes but he’s right. If Angeal hadn’t taken an interest in me I wouldn’t have gotten far at all.”

“That’s not true,” Cloud narrowed his eyes but Zack just shook his head at him.

“No it is. Before Angeal I was scrawny, hyperactive, undisciplined and really fucking forgetful. Ang used to say I’d forget my head if it wasn’t screwed on.”

Angeal chuckled, “not much has changed really,”

“Aside from all of that nonsense,” Genesis pressed on irritated at being sidecarred. “We have never, and will never see you as less than. You could put in your voluntary withdrawal tomorrow and we’d still love you and want you with us. It’s not your status we love Cloud it’s you.”

Cloud blushed deeply. Love. It’s funny how a four letter word can kamikaze straight into the side of his insecurities and drag them off a cliff.

They loved him. He kept forgetting that.

“I love you too,” he murmured staring deep into Gens eyes. The red head smiled at him adoringly, and Angeal placed a hand on the back of Clouds neck.

“Then stop playing the roll of the anti hero,” he squeezed once, tight enough to send sparks down Clouds spine.

“Okay,” said Cloud “I’ll try.”

[liquidstar]

If my mom sees a significant amount of blood she gets lightheaded, and has fainted on some occasions. Once it happened when we were kids, I wasn't there to witness it but I heard the story from my dad. Basically my brothers, around 7 or 8 at the time, were playing outside while my mom was making their lunch, and she accidentally cut her finger. It wasn't anything serious, but it drew a fair bit of blood and she passed out. My dad saw this and rushed over, but he didn't really know what to do so he just sort of started slapping her to wake her up (not recommended, but he had no idea and panicked)

At that exact moment my brothers both came in from playing, and all they saw was our mom unconscious on the floor and our dad slapping her. So, like, without even saying a word to each other they both just INSTANTLY start whaling on him, like, full blown attack mode to defend our mom. Which obviously didn't help the situation, but she did wake up and everything was fine.

Now our dad says that he's actually really glad they attacked him over what they thought was going on, because it means he raised good boys. And I still think that's true, they're very good boys.

[ovenproofowl]

i'm dying over that reveal. truly. truly. because on paper, the concept that ruby's mother was just an ordinary person and what made her so special was this belief everyone had feeding into her own mythology, creating something larger than life, is actually pretty cool. and, yeah, from wild blue yonder we know the doctor absolutely handed the power of suggestion over to an unknown entity that made it something tangible.. so it works.

sort of

but like. that 15 year old girl decided to drop her baby off at a church in the middle of the night in the most ostentatious, medieval looking cloak and then proceed to point mencingly at the road sign on the off chance the security camera would pick her up and that would somehow give someone the idea to name her daughter after said road sign??

i'm just saying... if that's the way you handle giving your baby up for adoption then there is absolutely nothing ordinary about you

[theoldkyokodied]

One wedding and three funerals

Background paintings under the cut

[puppyeared]

act 4 :(

@chipper-smol and i came to a realization

[sansainthesnow]

And I want you to know, and to feel in your soul, that someone has come and gone. ALICENT HIGHTOWER APPRECIATION WEEK 2024 DAY FOUR → fashion • change • colours

[cloudpalettes]

// link click s2 spoilers

reprise

[nataliesscatorccio]

YELLOWJACKETS

[willczek-art]

NPMD Tarot - The Hierophant

Others from the series: The Devil, The Lovers, The Star, Strength, The World

Symbolism + some WIP/alternatives are under the cut C:

My intuition put Grace as the High Priestess, but from what I've read it's more about spirituality and intuition, while the Hierophant is all about strong traditional beliefs and ruling/leading, so it fits her way better! :D

Left side/Beginning has the dance cancellation sign, since that was her mission and Max was her first victim, while on the right/Ending is Jason and the Black Book, her mission and source of power has changed.

Halo= superiority, holy mission, Red as a sign of danger/death to come (which is why the light it's only on the boys)

She's sitting on what's supposed to be the bleachers C:

Doodles:

[mammoth-clangen]

Ok so technically Summit won but i have no self control so u get Steppe Prowl as well, bc she has already has a ref from her debut >:3

Ice Fangs have both a given name and a surname, which are passed from mother to daughter and father to son (trans individuals can decide which parent they prefer to take after, or which children are given theirs, ie: Summit took his father's) This will be explained in comic too but it's not a spoiler so i have decided you are allowed to know as part of the teaser cx

Important: No, these two having refs does not mean they will inherently be joining the Kindred! As you can imagine that would cause quite a stir XD

Enjoy this meme i made months ago while drawing Moon 6 X'D

[thatonebirdwrites]

Cheating Death Part 2

Part 1 here.

Only seconds after Lena vanished in the portal, the Kryptonite cage melted into the floor. A yellow light pulsed so brightly, Kara had to close her eyes. Light infused her cells and pushed the pain of the Kryptonite away.

Lena's words echoed in Kara's head. How she'd stomped and shouted, the tears on her face, the desperation in her voice. How heartbroken she'd been when she'd said, "No, no you don't get to tell me who I am anymore."

She didn't know what to do. Lena had been hurting and grieving this entire time, and what had she and her friends done? Celebrated her brother's death, ignored Lena's increasingly isolating behaviors, and pretended everything was fine.

It wasn't fine.

Yet, the yellow light. Why had that activated? Was it Lena or the Fortress?

Kara ran through the Fortress to the control panel. She dug into the log and swiftly found Lena's code. It had been programmed to create the cage if Kara asked about Myriad, but then the yellow light was also programmed to heal Kara after Lena escaped. A note was annotated on that section of the code, and Kara's breath caught in her throat.

"I wish I could stop loving you. This hurts worse than death."

Tears dampened her cheeks and she wiped them away. What would she tell Alex? How can she explain any of this?

She didn't want her friends to turn on Lena, and Alex definitely would go after Lena if she knew about the cage. It'd been temporary, and Lena had programed a healing sun-bed equivalent burst for after. That alone gave her hope that she could still reach Lena.

Because even in her heartbreak, Lena did not want Kara dead.

She grabbed the weapon she needed, the same one Lena had used to stop Leviathan from killing Kara, and re-calibrated security. Her tears froze on her cheeks by the time she finished.

Kara flew out of the Fortress and high into the stratosphere. She listened for Lena's heartbeat, but heard nothing at first. Fear clenched her heart. Either Lena hid behind lead, or something terrible had gone wrong since she'd left. She hoped it was the former.

With a heavy heart, she flew to the DEO. Alex waited on a balcony.

"Kara?" Alex said, alarmed. "What the hell happened? Where's Lena?"

Kara held out the weapon. "It works as hoped. Sustained blast will keep Rama Khan down, and then attach the power dampeners."

Alex took the weapon with a frown. "Kara, what happened to Lena? Where is she?"

Kara shook her head. She couldn't voice it. She refused to believe Lena was lost to them. There had to be a way to save her, to bring her back, to repair what Kara had fucked up.

She pressed her hands against her face and flinched when Alex tried to touch her shoulder. "I got to find her," she whispered. "I got to make things right. I got to."

"Kara, I can't help if you don't tell me." Alex's voice held kindness, but Kara knew how quickly Alex could turn to anger. When it came to Kara's safety, Alex might cross a line she'd regret. Kara had done it for Alex a few times.

But with Lena? Kara had no boundaries. Lena held her heart in a way no one else did. She'd talked herself into settling for Mon-el, but it'd never been who she needed.

She needed Lena.

"Kara?" Alex tried again. "Kara, talk to me."

"She's the one who shot Lex." The words felt unreal.

Alex's brow wrinkled. "I thought he died when he fell."

Kara shook her head. "We never found a body or even parts from his suit, remember? If he had a portal watch, he could have gone anywhere."

Alex sucked in a breath. "And Lena was waiting for him?"

Kara nodded. "She shot him to protect us. She's been grieving and hurting all this time, and what have we done? Ignored her grief! Where were we for her pain?" She paced the balcony as fury at herself and everyone around her built up in her sternum. "I hurt her! I hurt her with my lies, and I have to fix this."

"Kara," Alex hefted the weapon. "Maybe let Lena have her space. We still have to deal with--"

"Alex, you didn't hear her!" Her pacing quickened and a groove appeared in the concrete from her superspeed.

Kara should tell Alex, and yet she couldn't. She needed to save Lena from Myriad herself, but to do that, she needed to find Lena. And she still couldn't hear her heartbeat.

She let out a shout of rage, her fist colliding with the wall and shattering the concrete. "I hurt the person I love! I have to fix this. I have to bring her back."

Her rage petered into sobs, and she fell to her knees.

Her, the strongest and fastest on the planet, brought to her knees by a Luthor.

She thinks of all the times she could have told Lena, and how she'd chickened out, afraid of losing her. Afraid of living a life without Lena's presence. Now a Lena-shaped hole had been carved in her chest, and she hurt.

It felt like Kryptonite all over again.

Was this how Lena had felt the past few months? This agony?

And yet, Lena had still helped. She'd still saved Kara's life. Still built devices that helped others. Why Myriad? Why use that monstrous device? Kara couldn't make sense of it. The months of pretending to be Kara's friend.

She should be angry at Lena. Furious at the betrayal, but she felt only grief. She'd started this with her lies, with leaving Lena in the dark. Lena could have helped so much more if she'd been in on it from the start. Then this never would have happened.

Kara sat there, silent, head-bowed long enough for Alex to leave and return with a cup of herbal tea. Rooibos since most other teas were too intense thanks to Kara's supertaste. Her fingers curled around the warm cup.

"I tasked Brainy and J'onn with the weapons. We'll deal with Leviathan." Alex smiled and squeezed Kara's shoulder. "You do what you need to do, Kara. I'm with you, okay?"

Kara nodded numbly. She sipped the tea and slowly became aware of a high-pitched beeping. "Wait, that's the signal watch," she murmured. She put down the cup and listened. It came from downtown. "Lena," she whispered.

Before Alex could respond, Kara blasted into the sky and broke the sound barrier. The crack whipped across the city and shook windows. She landed on Lena's balcony at L-Corp, ripped open the door, and dashed into a dark room. The beeping came from the stairwell.

Horror twisted her gut. She supersped down the stairs, all forty-three flights, until she reached the stairs just below ground level near the door to security.

She threw open the door and the thick scent of iron assaulted her nose.

Eve lay in a pool of blood, no heartbeat. Someone dressed in black lay crumbled near Eve, again no heartbeat. Blood coated the stairs from where Lena must have crawled.

Lena, her Lena, lay motionless, one hand on the top step. For a horrifyingly long second, Kara couldn't hear a heartbeat. She dropped next to Lena and pressed her fingers against Lena's pulse point.

No, there it was.

A faint badum-badum, the most precious sound in the universe.

She could do nothing for the others, but she still had a chance to save Lena. A scan of her body revealed the bullet in her side, how it pierced a lung.

Kara gathered Lena into her arms, and ran through the security sector, hitting each door with her shoulder to wrench it open, until she finally made her way outside.

Lena's blood soaked into her suit, her head rolling in Kara's arms. She held her close and flew as fast as she dared toward the DEO. "Lena, please," she whispered, "please hold on. Don't you dare die on me. Not now. Not like this."

When her feet touched down, she heard Alex's voice shouting about a Rama Khan sighting. Agents poured into vehicles, and the team prepared to leave.

Kara ignored them. She walked through the bustle, and people parted for her.

Alex turned from where she studied Brainy's screens. Her eyes widened. "What the hell...?"

"Please. Help her." Tears clouded her vision.

"Medical now. Brainy J'onn's in charge." Alex grasped Kara's arm and maneuvered her through the mess of the control center. Technicians worked on last minute fine-tuning of weapons, and others manned screens plotting possible vectors. Activity that meant nothing to Kara, not if Lena died.

Not if she couldn't speak her last truth to Lena.

She laid Lena on the medical bed, and Alex ordered her nurses to get an IV in immediately. Kara began to pace, the blood drying on her suit. Alex cut away Lena's shirt and examined the wound.

"She needs surgery now."

"What do I do?" she asked Alex, anguished. "What do I do?"

Alex shook her head. "You can't help with this. Go help J'onn, and wear Lena's anti-kryptonite suit. I'm not sure how long I'll be in surgery."

"Can you save her?"

"I will try my best," Alex said. She refused to look at Kara, and that told her far too much.

Alex didn't think Lena would make it.

"Promise?" the words came out small, plaintive.

"Promise. Now get out of my way." Alex hooked the IV bag to the pole on one end of the bed, and rolled it toward an interior suite. Two nurses followed along with a second doctor.

Kara closed her eyes and listened to the most beautiful heartbeat in the universe -- it faintly hung on, slower and slower with each passing minute.

She couldn't stay and watch the medical team open up Lena. She couldn't.

Instead, she grabbed the anti-kryptonite suit. As it flowed over her, she almost wept again. It felt like Lena hugged her, the suit entirely her design and her nanites.

She flew outside and listened for J'onn. The fight was to the southeast by the docks.

Hadn't Leviathan been targeting Lena? She'd saved her once from them already. Maybe twice if she counted the break-in that had knocked Lena unconscious.

Now Lena was dying, and Kara didn't just want justice for Lena.

She wanted to tear apart whoever ordered that assassin.

The windows shook at the sonic boom, and the ground cratered when she landed.

Rama Khan and another Leviathan member battled J'onn and Dreamer, who had the weapon from the Fortress. Agents, with adjusted weaponry to match the power-disrupting frequency, scattered around the docks.

Kara didn't care about the risk. She didn't care about the Kryptonite weapons the assholes carried.

She crashed into Rama Khan and threw him into a dock building. The wall crumpled. "Did you hire Lena Luthor's killer?" she growled.

Rama Khan laughed and stood with hardly a mark on him and his ridiculous earth-toned suit. "Those who cross Leviathan do not live to tell the tale. Let you now join her, Supergirl." He extended his hand and the ground shook violently.

A blast from Dreamer's gun sent Rama Khan sprawling. Kara sped over and grabbed him by the throat. Her feet she stomped on his arms. "No one hurts Lena and survives," she growled. Her eyes glowed, and she let out a scream of grief and fury.

She blasted him and punched him again and again. Blood gushed from his face, but then he melted into the earth and stumbled into being a few feet away.

Only for Dreamer to blast him again. Kara pummeled him with the rage of a thousand suns. Her vision red, and the land ripped and shredded in their fight. Part of the pier demolished when Kara threw Rama Khan's accomplice into it. Another building fell when Rama blasted Kara into its walls.

Rama Khan slowed, each blast from the gun scrambled his powers long enough for Kara to rip into him until he bled from multiple places. She lost track of the others, so intent on eliminating the one who ordered Lena's hit.

"Kara!" J'onn clamped the power dampeners on the alien. "Kara, we got him."

Kara clenched Rama's neck and looked down to see the cuffs clasped to his wrists.

How much loss could a heart handle? Why did the universe seek to torture her so? Her entire planet, nearly all her friends, and now the woman she loves most -- loss melted through her crevices, filled her with a blinding fury.

She'd fought to keep everyone alive. It's why she needed to be in control, but that obsession of controlling everything, to make sure she never lost, had poisoned her. She couldn't control everything.

She couldn't even save Lena. The thought of Lena dying in surgery, of never hearing her voice again -- even Lena shouting in anger?

Her fingers crunched bone. Rama Khan tumbled from her grasp and hit the ground with a thump, motionless.

Dreamer and J'onn looked at her, but she didn't respond to their words or looks. Agents swarmed around them to secure the site, while Brainy set up the containment unit for Rama Khan and his accomplices. The ruckus roared like the sea in her ears.

She turned without a word and shot into the sky. She flew as high as she could, to where little to no oxygen existed. The fury burned in her, and she wanted to rip herself apart. She deactivated her helmet, turned off its life support systems, and let the lack of air suffocate her and her emotions.

She'd live. She'd always live, wouldn't she? While all she loved died.

She closed her eyes and let herself fall. Air whooshed around her body, screamed in her ears as she hit terminal velocity. For those brief moments, she heard nothing but the shrill wind, the rest of the Earth drowned out in her fall. A moment of release from the endless soundscape.

Halfway to the ground, she righted herself and flew to the edge of Earth's atmosphere. Again she let herself fall. For a third time, she soared high and fell.

Each time she let herself get closer and closer to hitting the ocean. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't outpace her fury at her own actions. At her failure.

This time she hit the water. She sunk into its depths.

Sea life swam around her, the distant calls of whales rippled through the water. What should delight her brought her sorrow.

No, she couldn't die. Her wretched powers, her curse, kept her alive. Kept her isolated from those she loved. Her careful, practiced control meant even in moments of extreme emotion, she still had to make sure not to hug too tightly. And kissing? How many noses had she broken?

All she wanted was Lena. Even if she could never be with Lena, she needed Lena to be alive. To be healthy and happy. Kara could live with just being on the sidelines, right? As long as Lena was alive.

She burst out of the ocean in a shower of sea water. She hung in the air and watched the waves below her. Her ears tuned to her favorite heartbeat, and there it was, faint, far too faint, but still pulsing.

A slither of hope wove into Kara's wretched spirit. She flew back to the DEO, the wind drying the moisture from the sea.

When she landed, Nia met her at the balcony's doors. "Kara," she breathed out as if she'd been running. "Been looking everywhere."

Kara crossed her arms over her chest. "What do you want?"

"It's Lena. Alex said to let you know the surgery is ongoing and Lena's handling it like a pro." Nia met her gaze, but worry painted across her face. "Don't lose hope yet. She may still live."

Kara said nothing. She heard the rebuke in Nia's words, but she didn't regret her actions. For Lena, there was no boundaries. She'd destroy a thousand Rama Khans if it meant saving Lena.

She followed Nia down the hall, through two intersections, and into the medical bay. Most of the beds were occupied by injured agents from the Leviathan battle. It was the surgery room that occupied all of Kara's attention.

Lena's heart beat still in those glass walls.

Kara walked up to them and pressed a hand against the cool glass. Lena looked so pale. So fragile.

The tears returned. Her chest constricted with a Lena-shaped hole that ached with each beat of her heart.

She didn't move from that spot for the rest of the surgery. Kara held vigil in silence, unmoving. She'd given Lena revenge on those who tried to kill her, and now Kara waited.

Waited for hope to dawn once more.

/end part 2

[littlebittyhollowbugs]

I will never love any interpretation of Ghost, Hollow and Hornet more than I love the interpretation of them being ultimately good, fighting for peace for everyone around them, caring deeply for Hallownest (or what remains of Hallownest at least) and caring deeply for each other and peace for their family at last.

I love kind Ghost.

Ghost who goes out of the way to gift flowers to lonely bugs.

Ghost who will rescue Zote whenever given the opportunity, without thanks or any form of reward.

Ghost who rescues grubs because they are trapped and crying to be freed.

Ghost who despite having limited ability of expression, will find some way to convey appreciation for others. (Sitting beside them. Listening to them talk or sing. Bowing out of respect.)

Ghost who is excited when in the company of good friends.

Ghost who spares the life of the nailsmith.

Ghost who mourns the loss of those fallen.

Ghost who eventually remembers their past, remembers being abandoned by their sibling, and still chooses to fight, to do everything that it takes, to free the hollow knight. To put an end to their suffering. To take Hollow's place, or to die.

There is no reward for this. There is nothing to gain. Ultimately Ghost is willing to suffer forever or to die in order to give others peace.

Ghost makes many many mistakes, and can make selfish or reckless decisions, but ultimately, Ghost is forgiving and loving.

I love Hollow who genuinely wants the people of Hallownest to be at peace. (Ironically just wanting that alone made it impossible for Hollow to grant them that peace.

But still, Hollow wants that.)

Hollow who loves Hallownest. Who loves their father and who loves his kingdom.

Hollow who is relentless in protecting it. Who would suffer for over a hundred years protecting whatever there is that can possibly be saved.

Hollow who has had the radiance influencing it all that time. The radiance who hates the king, who hates his people. Who tried to convince it to hate them to.

Hollow who loves them regardless.

Who feels empathy for everyone. Who understands their suffering more than anyone and wants nothing more than for them to have peace.

Hollow who, after finally being freed, chooses to live a kind life. To be understanding and gentle.

Who has every right to be bitter and angry and closed off, but who, after finally receiving the opportunity to live, to actually live, chooses to find everything good left in the world that they fought so hard for.

Hollow who learns to love openly and to no longer be afraid.

Hollow who is eventually excited to be able to express love in small ways.

Hollow is stalwart and just. But kind.

Hornet who, despite everything that she went through, despite losing so much, nearly everything, continues to stand and to fight for life because it still matters to her.

Hornet who fights to honor those that she lost, especially her mother.

Hornet who is hesitant to be hopeful, but is hopeful anyway.

Hornet who is hesitant to form any friendships out of fear that she will lose them, But who longs for friendship, for family..

Hornet who is proud of her siblings, who loves them despite not wanting to, who feels guilt knowing that the fate of the kingdom must rely on them.

Hornet who will rush in to assist her siblings in their final battle, knowing that she may very well die.

Hornet who, after given the opportunity to be with her siblings again, wants nothing more than to help them heal. For them all to heal.

Hornet who loves and is loved in return.

Ghost and Hollow who love, and are loved in return.

A little broken family that understands each other, understands that nothing that happened to any of them was fair, and who forgive each other, who love each other because after all this time..

They finally can.

Not one of them is without their (sometimes severe) flaws. Not one of them isn't damaged after everything that has happened.

And still they choose love.

This quote by Mary Shelley captures my interpretations of the siblings perfectly.~

"Life, although it may only be an accumulation of anguish, is dear to me, and I will defend it”

[bairdthereader]

Heartstopper Mini Arc: Charlie and Tara

From Charlie's resentment and reluctance and Tara's confusion . . .

. . . to heartfelt, reassuring conversation that helps them understand each other (and themselves) better.

Two people who care so, so deeply about their friends were bound to become friends themselves. 💕

[piningpercussionist]

Weed smoking girlfriends! But they can just be hanging out if you prefer ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Happy 4/20!

[leafie-draws]

still here

[skyward-floored]

Whumptober Day 11: seeing double

Totally not what this prompt meant, but I don’t care lol. I do care that I keep making Wild cry though, sorry buddy 😬

No clue if anyone cares anymore, but this has some brief age of calamity spoilers in it. Just a heads up.

Warnings: broken bone, discussed past character death

Ao3 link

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Wild had two thoughts as he went plunging through the portal, the others’ frantic cries in his ears:

One, that hopefully Legend wouldn’t give him too smug of an ‘I told you so’ the next time he saw him, since Wild had entirely forgone his advice to stay away from Dark Link and was now plunging rapidly through the air. And two, well, at least I’m going to fall into the water down there.

Which he promptly did with an explosive splash.

It wasn’t so high up that he was badly hurt, but Wild was still thrown for a loop, and found himself crashing down a river with little sense of which way was up.

Water got in his mouth and he spluttered, trying to spit it out and also get his head above the surface so he could breathe. The current was fast here though, and Wild couldn’t do much except flail around like a drunk Zora.

Wait, could Zora get drunk?

He actually had no clue.

The current got suddenly faster, and Wild breathed in some water as he got smacked against the rocks, coughing and hacking as he struggled to get any air. He managed a wet gasp when his head briefly poked up, but then he was pulled under again.

Air wasn’t the only thing Wild had gotten when he went up though— he’d also gotten a sight of the river up ahead. And at the sight of the waterfall rapidly approaching, his struggles grew even more frantic.

I need to reach shore, he thought as he continued to cough and claw his way to the river’s edge in a panic. I need to reach shore now, I need air I need—

The angle of the water shifted, and Wild was shot out of the waterfall, the rapid change in direction making his head spin.

He found himself in open air, water still in his lungs, and he clumsily grabbed for his paraglider as the lake below rapidly approached. Wild managed to snap it open just in time, but he didn’t manage a good grip on the handle.

His arm slipped, and Wild slammed into the sand near the shore, a choked yell escaping him as pain blazed up his shoulder.

All he could do was cough up water for a minute and catch his breath, trying not to wrench his shoulder more. Something was broken in there; he wasn’t sure if it was his shoulder itself or his arm or collarbone, but it hurt. He could barely move without his whole arm lighting up in agony, and hoped blearily that none of the others had suffered the same fate as him.

Then he heard a splash behind him, and his stomach sank.

Had one of the others fallen in the portal already? Or was it something else? That hadn’t sounded big enough to be a splash from something falling from the waterfall, but then again, he could be wrong.

“There, look!”

The voice sounded familiar, but Wild couldn’t place it over the sound of the water behind him and the blood rushing in his ears. He tried to raise himself up, and pain tore across his senses, and for a minute all he could focus on was the fire ripping through his shoulder.

“—know who he is? He looks just like—”

“—in the water, don’t—”

Two voices floated around his head as the fire eased, and Wild took a deep breath, opening his eyes again. His hair had fallen in his face, and between that and his blurry vision he couldn’t see much, especially through the damp strands. Unless he moved again, but that seemed like a bad idea.

Wild groaned, blinking to try and get the hair away from his eyes, but he barely succeeded. His wet hair slipped to the side, but all he could make out were two blobs, silhouetted by the sun shining behind them.

Then he heard a soft gasp, and the sound of a weapon being drawn.

“How is this—”

“This has trap written all over it,” a different voice than the first interrupted, soft, but sharp. Cold steel nudged Wild’s chin, and he stiffened. “Don’t go near him.”

The other voice made a worried noise as Wild weakly coughed. “I don’t think he would have fallen down a waterfall on purpose and hurt himself like this if that were true.”

“It could still be a trick.”

“I know... but we won’t get any answers if he’s too dazed to speak.”

Wild heard a huff, then the sound of footsteps padding towards him in a familiar way. A hand settled over his shoulder, and Wild groaned again, a soothing noise coming from the voice.

“Hold on just a moment.”

Then a feeling like that of a gentle stream swept over his shoulder, quiet and small, but carrying the mighty power of water along with it. Wild automatically relaxed, sinking into the bubbly feeling. A blue light flickered in his vision, healing his shoulder in a familiar way, and Wild relaxed even further before he abruptly stiffened again.

Wait...

The smooth magic trickled into his middle, down to where his lungs were still burning from the water he’d inhaled. It soothed the ache, and though Wild still felt exhausted, he could tell his shoulder had been completely fixed as well. Even the various scrapes and bruises from the fight before the river had been healed.

Which meant...

The bubbly rush of magic faded away, Wild’s vision fully cleared, and his stomach dropped out.

Red scales. Yellow eyes. A petite figure covered in scales that were smooth and shiny in the sunlight, and healing magic that was fading from slender hands.

“M... Mipha?” Wild choked out.

The Zora woman (it couldn’t be Mipha, it couldn’t—) gave him a concerned look, but before Wild could do or say anything further, the steel was back at his neck.

Wild stilled, and followed the blade resting at his neck up to the person holding it. His already fast heartbeat tripled, and he choked for a second time.

The person holding a blade at his throat was himself.

His double’s hair was much shorter, pulled back into a neat ponytail, and instead of the champion’s tunic he was wearing the Zora armor Wild had received. His eyes were steely as he watched Wild, but the most shocking thing about him was the fact that the right side of his face was entirely smooth.

He didn’t have a single one of the scars that had killed Wild.

I’m unconscious. I’m dreaming. I hit my head on a rock and I’m hallucinating—

“Explain yourself. Who are you?” his double demanded, not appearing to notice how Wild’s world was caving in on itself. Wild stared, and coughed once, still feeling tired from his fight with the river, and just... unable to process this. What could he even say?

What was going on?

“I asked you a question, who are you? What are you doing in Zora’s Domain?” his double repeated, voice even sharper.

Mipha sucked in a worried breath as she stared at Wild, and touched the double’s arm. “Oh no, did... did a little guardian bring you?” she asked, and Wild stared at her, her words jumbling in his head as he stared.

Mipha.

Mipha.

Mipha was alive here. Wild was alive here, and missing his scars, and wearing the Zora armor that Mipha had crafted to give to him as a—

“Wh... who are you?” Wild whispered, throat suddenly dry as bone. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe it was just a mistake, a strange coincidence, but he— he had to know. He had to know.

“We asked you first,” Link’s double replied suspiciously, and Mipha set a hand on his shoulder.

“Link, he was just injured and half-drowned, I believe he’s confused. If he were here to kill us, he already would have tried,” she said pointedly, studying Wild with an intent look. “I think he looks too much like you to be a coincidence.”

“It could still be a trick. A Yiga or something,” his double said suspiciously. Wild didn’t blame him. That did sound like something the Yiga would do.

“But why add the scars and long hair?” Mipha countered, and the double looked frustrated.

“To confuse us, I’m sure there’s a motive. He’s probably here for you, you know you’re—”

“If you say “at risk” again Link, I will set Sidon on you,” Mipha said with a little huff, and turned back towards Wild with a kind-if-cautious look. “My apologies. I am Princess Mipha of the Zora, and this is my husband, Link.”

The words were like a slap, even though Wild knew they were coming.

Husband. Mipha. Zora armor.

Husband.

Link.

Wild would have fallen over backwards if he’d been upright in any way, and he stared between Mipha and his double, wondering if he was about to be sick.

They all knew the portals were transporting them through time. Wild had been a part of Time and Wind’s discussion on fractured timelines, and they all knew that there were splits and sections where the history of Hyrule didn’t make sense.

But this...

Was this a timeline where Wild hadn’t failed?

Mipha’s face grew more worried the longer Wild stared at them without speaking, and even his double started to look a little concerned.

“Did I miss an injury?” Mipha asked, scooting closer again, and Wild froze as she approached.

“No, no you got— you got everything,” Wild choked out. He felt perfectly healthy apart from being tired and his falling-apart mental state, just like if he’d used Mipha’s grace. Even though he hadn’t used it in nearly a year because the champions were finally at rest and they’d passed on and Mipha—

Wild lurched to his feet, using a rock for support, and immediately the other Link’s blade was raised again.

“Stay where you are,” he said sharply, and Wild stumbled backwards towards the water. His double’s face grew fierce and he leapt around him and blocked him off from the river. “I said stay where you are! We’ve told you who we are, now tell us your identity or I will treat you as a threat.”

Wild stilled, and swallowed. He might as well explain.

“I’m... well, Link,” he began, and the other Link didn’t move. “You... probably figured that out. I... I don’t know how I got here— I mean, I do, but it wasn’t on purpose, I-I... I don’t know what you mean about a guardian, but one didn’t bring me here.”

Wild looked at Mipha again, and swallowed thickly, his eyes stinging.

“This isn’t a trap. I don’t know what’s going on, but I’m not here to hurt you,” he croaked, and the other Link pulled his sword back just a hair. “I— my companions and I are traveling through time, but... I think something went wrong,” he finished in a whisper.

We’ve never had anything like this happen with the portals before.

Did the Shadow do this?

“Time travel...” Mipha said thoughtfully, and exchanged a loaded look with the other Link.

His face had creased further, but in a different way, and he finally pulled the sword away from Wild’s neck. He kept it at the ready though, and watched Wild intensely.

“How did you get here?” he asked again, a little less accusatory and a little more curious.

Wild exhaled. “It’s a long story... but it was through a portal,” he said, deciding he would just... ignore what was going on for now. It was that or completely freak out, and he wanted to know more before passing out due to shock. “My group is hunting a Shadow, one ripping holes in time. We’re trying to stop him.”

“So no Terrako then?” Link questioned, and Wild shook his head in confusion.

“No? No... Terrako. Just portals that sometimes spew powerful monsters.”

Link and Mipha both stiffened.

“These monsters, do they have darkened blood?” Mipha asked, and Wild nodded. “Oh my. We’ve seen some up in the highlands, remember that moblin, Link?”

Link grimaced. “Yes. What a disaster. We assumed it was just leftover magic from Astor or something of that nature, not... time travel related. Bazz is still recovering.” He paused for a second, then his eyes went wide and he whipped his head back towards Link. “You said you came through a portal that expels these monsters?”

“Yeah, from upriver somewhere,” Wild nodded. “But it’s not sending out monsters right now. I fell through it, then fell right in the river.”

Link frowned. “So no monsters were coming out when you went through?”

“No, they were all on the other side, my group was fighting their leader. But I don’t know—”

“Papa?”

Link froze, and Mipha looked worried as Wild turned around towards where the voice had come from.

A young, orangey colored Zora was poking his head up from the water, and he looked between Wild and Link, a wide look on his face.

“Papa?” he repeated in a curious voice, and Wild stared, studying the little Zora’s features.

“Stay in the water, Ty,” Link said seriously, and the Zora hesitated, eyes darting between Mipha and Link and Wild. Then he hopped out and scurried over to stand next to Mipha. He hid behind her leg and watched Wild with large blue eyes, and Wild began to shake, recognizing them as his own.

Oh Hylia, haven’t you put me through enough?

Mipha put a hand on Ty’s arm, and he continued to watch Wild, his expression concerned as he studied his face.

“Papa... hurt?” he said worriedly, and Link shifted around so he was standing beside him, and placed a hand on his head.

“No, I’m not hurt,” Link reassured, and Ty switched to clinging to his leg instead, still staring at Wild. His orange scales shone brightly in the sunshine, like the last rays of light before the sun set.

“Wh... who is...?” Wild choked out, and Mipha gave him a look that was as conflicted as he felt.

“This is our son. Tyde,” she explained gently, like she knew the words would hurt.

They did, hitting Wild like a laser, and he felt a mixture of longing and wonder and grief so intense he was nearly sick.

Tyde was small, and as he shifted around the other Link’s leg, Wild saw that his left arm was shorter than it should be, the fins the wrong size. He had Wild— Link’s eyes, and his frame was proportioned more like a Hylian, but he had golden-orange and white scales all along his body, and had the Zora tail on the back of his head.

All in all, he was exactly what Wild would expect a child of his and Mipha’s to look like.

A tear fell down Wild’s cheek without his permission, and he sank back down to his knees, overwhelmed. He was married here. He had a child here.

This was what would have happened if he hadn’t failed?

This was how much Mipha had loved him?

Wild began to shake, and barely even noticed as Mipha approached and knelt beside him, so lost was he in his own mind.

“You’re from the world the older Sidon came from, aren’t you,” Mipha said quietly, and Wild shakily raised his head to look at her. “I... doubt he remembered in order to tell you. Zelda theorized they all wouldn’t recall anything from their time here.”

Wild gave a small shake of his head, and Mipha sighed.

“It’s complicated I’m afraid, but we’ve dealt with time travel before,” she explained. “And me and Sidon, we... we talked a little, about things. He said that in his time the champions were slain, and that you nearly were along with us. But you were placed in a sleep for one hundred years in order to heal, and then you saved the princess.”

Wild nodded mutely, and Mipha’s face turned further grieved. She carefully reached forward, and Link couldn’t help his flinch as her cool palm rested on his cheek, right over his scars.

The other Link behind Mipha had gone white, his sword finally lowered. Tyde tugged at his pant leg, and Link wordlessly picked him up, holding him tightly to his chest as he locked gazes with Wild.

Wild could only imagine what was going through his head.

Mipha wiped the tear off Wild’s cheek then withdrew her hand, giving him the same smile that he barely remembered from a hundred years ago. It almost made Wild fully break down, but he choked back his tears. He didn’t want her to feel like she had to comfort him.

“I’ll h-have to hear about this adventure Sidon had,” he said, managing not to make his voice sound too watery. “Sounds like it w-was something.”

“It was,” Mipha said quietly. “He always spoke so highly of you.”

She looked like she wanted to say more, but Wild’s double spoke up then, Tyde still nestled up to his chest.

“In your world, we... lost?” he asked in a quiet voice, and Wild swallowed thickly.

“We... did. I failed,” he whispered, not looking at Mipha. “The champions... our weapons turned against us. Overwhelmed us. I only survived because of a Sheikah invention that took a hundred years to work so I could fix my failure. So many died...”

He took in a shuddering breath, and looked at Mipha and his double again, their child still watching him intently.

“But you won here. You did it, you won—”

Wild’s voice choked off, and he barely noticed Tyde tug on his father’s sleeve, trying to get his attention. He did notice when Tyde pointed at Wild though, his brow scrunched up.

“Hurt,” he said with another tug, and for some reason that one small word made Wild lose the rest of his composure.

Suddenly it was too much, the sight of himself holding his and Mipha’s child, Mipha herself sitting beside him, her hand on her husband’s arm. It was a family Wild never had, never would have, and the fact that there was a timeline somewhere where Wild hadn’t failed them, where they had the opportunity to exist, it was just—

A small sob escaped him, and he pulled back, his shaking starting up again. Before he could bolt though, Tyde suddenly squirmed out of his father’s arms and padded over to Wild. Wild froze as he put a tiny hand on his arm, and when Wild looked down at him, he ran his hand up and down for a moment before nodding.

“Better,” he declared, then scampered back to Wild’s double.

Wild could only stare, tears dripping down his cheeks as Tyde climbed back into his father’s arms.

“He’s seen me heal before, he thinks he can too,” Mipha explained with a faint smile. “He does that whenever anyone cries, he thinks they’re hurt.”

A thick laugh burst from Wild’s throat, and he smiled shakily through the tears only running faster down his face. Tyde kept watching him, and Link swallowed back the gigantic lump in his throat in order to speak.

“Thanks,” he managed through his tears, and Tyde gave him a shy smile before hiding his face in Link’s chest.

Wild breathed out shakily, shuddering with a sob he tried not to let escape, and Mipha and his double stayed quiet as they let him cry, Tyde quietly watching them all. Mipha put her hand on his arm at one point, and Wild only cried harder, wishing he could remember her more, wishing she hadn’t died, wishing he didn’t even know what.

He merely cried, and Mipha let him, a different version of himself watching in pale-faced silence.

That was where Wolfie found them barely a quarter hour later, Wild’s eyes red as he quietly explained more about the infected monsters, Mipha and his double asking worried questions about what was going on, Tyde resting against his knee.

And nine Links became ten.