#a bitch changes her name a ton i know

[disaster-theysbian]

Gotta say, I've been out as a lesbian for 3 years and nonbinary for a year and a half. And I've noticed something.

Just because someone *always* gets your name and pronous correct, and angrily calls out anyone who forgets, doesn't necessarily mean they support you.

Conversely, just because someone struggles to remember your name and pronouns, or can't wrap their head around gender neutral/neo pronouns at all, doesn't necessarily mean they DON'T support you.

This is applicable to any situation really not just queer shit. Watch what people do, not just what they say, and you will find your friends. Someone might shower you with compliments and have common interests with you, but what happens when you tell them no? Do they get angry when they are corrected? Do they have kind things to say about other people?

My colleagues wouldn't know a gender-neutral pronoun if one hit them in the face with a dictionary, but they make sure I've had a lunch break and get home safely. They have my back if I have a difficult patient. They defend me against other staff members who like to create drama and bitch about people as if they're still in the school playground. If someone has something to say about me being a big ol' queer, they make it known that discrimination has no place in our unit.

My best friend in the whole entire world forgets my name and pronouns every day. When the organisers of her therapy group changed "men and women" to "people" and "he/she" to "they" in order to be more inclusive, there was outcry. Everything from the "it just doesn't sound right" grammar-policing nonsense to the "f*cking special snowflakes are offended by everything". She came down on them like a ton of bricks. She said if the organisers hadn't told them that it was changing, that they wouldn't have noticed. She told them they obviously haven't loved someone outside of the gender binary and they were missing out. She then told them how she had seen me grow and develop since I came out, and how in awe she was of the person I had become. No, she doesn't understand it at all, but why should that mean that she can't be there for me and appreciate how happy I am to be able to be me? Why should that mean, because you lot don't understand it, that someone with the same issues as the rest of the therapy group feels unsafe and unwelcome and doesn't get their issues resolved? As a result, a few of them changed their minds, INCLUDING HER OWN FATHER, and the rest at least shut the hell up about it.

ON THE FLIP SIDE...

A queer person who used my correct name and pronouns delighted in making me walk on eggshells, inventing reasons to be angry with me, convinced me I was a terrible person and even went as far as to try and turn me against my own therapist. They tried to tell me that my therapist only said I was a good person because she was paid to, and that because they themselves had a psychology degree that they could tell I had all these complexes and needed to work hard to be a good person, and it was unlikely I'd never get there. (I chose to listen to my therapist and stop being friends with this person).

A queer person who used my correct name and pronouns continued to do things that made me uncomfortable when I asked them to stop. Never said in as many words "you're not allowed to hang out with your friends" but conveniently had an emergency every time I had plans, and accused me of being uncaring if I needed my own space. They knew I had difficulty asking for help, but still got angry with me when I asked because I didn't ask "soon enough".

A queer person who used my correct name and pronouns told me they would look after me and they didnt. .

A queer person threatened to misgender me MORE when I corrected them.

I'm just saying, that if you choose to yeet everyone who doesn't get your name and pronouns right... that doesn't necessarily make you safe. We live in a very binary world. As much as we want that to change, it won't if we ignore or shout at the bits we don't like. (Believe me, I've tried).

[slvthrs]

STARBOY | vinnie hacker

— MINORS PLEASE FUCK OFF FOR UR OWN GOOD —

your dealer is the only constant in your life but that doesn’t mean he’s the best

DRUG DEALER!VINNIE X FEM!READER

WARNINGS: NSFW CONTENT MINORS DNI, use of drugs, degradation n praise kink, pet names, unprotected sex (use birth control idiots), car sex, choking, mentions of anxiety if you squint bit of grinding

word count: 2.6k

authors note: this is inspired by the weeknd song ‘starboy’

The sound of me and my friends rushing around inside my friends house is deafening, Max and Chloe are clearly drunk from pre-game drinking and lip-syncing Weeknd songs with the majority of the lyrics coming out as slurring. Ellie and Ross are in a corner trying to smoke without someone interrupting them whilst Bowie is making out with some random guy he found on the bus who clearly is on some sorta substance. 

We are supposed to be ready to go to a party at my friend Venus’ house but at this pace the only one ready is Alex who is always ready an hour before we go anywhere. I’ve finished my makeup already but I’m currently deciding between 2 outfits- a black leather skirt and a waistcoat top that shows too much cleavage to be modest (but modesty is never my goal) or denim flare pants and a cropped corset top. In the end I end up wearing the skirt but with ripped panty hose and the cropped corset top along with my favorite pair of chunky black boots and a considerable amount of silver jewelry to match with my earrings.

When I’m done changing I fluff up my hair and smudge up my eye makeup a little and put on my black mask to walk out of my room to hear Chloe wolf whistle at me who's clearly drunk out of her mind. We quickly grab our phones and ID’s and head out to find a cab. 

As my friends wail for a cab I’m busy texting my dealer- the same dealer I’ve had for years and the only one person who's never abandoned me.

vinnieee

Are you fucking drunk already?

srop being such a bitch

*stop

r u coming to venus’ house party 

Yeah I’ll be where I always am, come find me okay?

yeah yeah see u in a b it loseer

I smile and put my phone in my corset and step into the cab my friends found. We give the driver the location of the house and I put my headphones in and shuffle to some Tupac hoping that the drive will be quicker. 

We get out of the car and I immediately pull out my joint and a lighter and light it. We walk into the house to be met with booming music and my friends being pulled away from me as I instinctually walk to the back of the house and into a small room that only a few people know where it’s located- including Vinnie.

I walk in and find Vinnie sitting on a couch, manspreading, with his phone in one hand and bottle of beer in another and I find myself sitting right next to him waiting for him to acknowledge me.

“Hi princess,” He says while putting his phone back in his pocket and bringing the bottle to his lip and taking a swig. I wait and watch the way his arms flex and his Adam apple bob as he swallows the drink.

I flop my head to the side letting it rest on the back of the couch and let myself take in his outfit. It's a black Gorillaz shirt with black boyfriend jeans and some shoes that I can’t really tell in the dark, but my eyes drop to the rings on his fingers- a skull one, a cross (ironic) and a heart on with an eye in it, all silver. I locate the final piece of his outfit: a simple silver chain. 

He notices me staring, “You gonna say hi or keep checking me out sweetheart?” He raises his eyebrow and meets my gaze- fuck i’m not slick when I’m high.

“God you're so cocky- I was not checking you out Vinnie” I retorted trying to look as truthful as possible.

He pulls the joint from my hand and rolls over so his back is on the couch rather than his side and he takes a puff while throwing his hands that are closest to me behind my back, “I’m not cocky I just know when someones checking me out- and don’t call me Vinnie”

“Okay ‘Hacker’”, I try to say in the most condescending tone I can muster, “Hacker is such a dumb name to go by Vinnie it’s cooler than ‘Hacker’”

He chuckles, “It’s not meant to be cool I just don’t want random druggies to know my real name” he scrunches his nose- it’s kinda cute.

“But like why did you pick your last name that’s so fucking stupid and it reminds me of dumb fraternity guys” I pout

He moves his face so it's right in front of mine and his hot air is fanning over my face, “Whatever baby, ‘Hacker’ ‘Vinnie’, your still gonna be screaming one name by the end of the night” He says flashing his canines

I push against his chest, “That’s so fucking corny oh my lord, your such a loser” I say while his lips remain inches from mine

He cocks his eyebrow, “Yeah, I’m such a loser”, he stretches, “Wait, why are you here did you want something” 

“Oh uh yeah like 5 grams of coke or something like that” I ask, I don’t know why but asking for drugs is kinda embarrassing.

“Yeah sure come with me” He says, pulling my hands from our little room oasis to where the actual party is and I can hear ‘Starboy’ playing so instead of following Vinnie I pull him to the dance floor.

“What the fuck, what are we-” I cut him off by throwing my hands over his shoulder

“Shut up Vinnie, just listen to the song, it’s basically your life verbatim” I sway us to the beat of the song while he listens intently. 

“Huh it kinda is like my life- you were right” His hands end up on my waist as he sways us around the dance floor and adds a spin here and there.

We nearly forget what we need to do when Vinnie snaps me out of my trance, “Wait we have stuff to do” and he pulls me outside to his car.

It's some sort of black 4 seater. It looks expensive but then again I don’t know shit about cars, it has a red interior- his dealer job definitely pays off it looks like a car those sugar daddies drive.

We end up sitting in the back with our knees touching, and Vinnie is rummaging through a black duffle bag and comes out with a tiny bag of white powder.

I lean over and grab the bag and plant a kiss on his cheek ignoring the way it almost immediately gets dusted in a layer of pink. 

“Vinnie have I told you how much I love you”, I express while rummaging through my corset to find money, before he places his hand on mine and stops mine from moving.

“It’s on the house as long as you do a line with me” He says with a smirk.

I scoff and pull out the middle cup holder and grab my ID and open the tiny bag to make sure I don’t tear it and pour 2 lines and fix them with my ID and finger.

He snorts the first line closing one of his nostrils and dragging his nose along the line and inhaling. When he's done he makes a sound of exasperation and leans his head on the car seat. I copy his actions by snorting the line and leaning my head on the car seat, I close my eyes and just sit in silence for a bit- a comfortable silence letting the buzz of the coke settle in my head giving me a burst of adrenaline.

When I open my eyes I’m met with Vinnie checking me out, he does it alot but this time it’s a lot less subtle. His eyes dragged over my skin and stopped at my face. 

I close the divider between us and shuffle into his personal space, “Hey big man whatcha lookin at?”

“Your really pretty”, He says it a lot but I don’t know why he never says it sober, “I know idiot, you say it a lot” and his face leans closer to mine

I bite the inside of my cheek, he’s so close to kissing me but I’m so conflicted. If I kiss him, what if he hates it, what if I ruin our friendship, what if? But my stronger, reckless, impulsive side wins and I lean into kissing his lips with a haste peck.

And he doesn’t do anything.

Why isn’t he doing anything?

What's wrong?

Did I read the situation wrong?

Oh no I fucked up?

What if-

All my thoughts come to a halt when his hand lands under my chin grabbing it and pulling me to kiss him. I lean further into the kiss when he grabs my legs and throws them over his so I’m straddling his lap now. We keep making out as I grind onto his lap, but when I make a particular motion he throws his head back with a low groan.

This gives me the perfect moment to latch onto his neck and start sucking hickies while his hands flip up my skirt and start grabbing my ass. 

“Oh fuck that feels so good keep going” I keep sucking and roll my hips on his lap

With one last hickey I pull back and try to catch my breath, panting in heavy breaths. 

His hands return to waistband of my skirt and they start toying with the edge whilst he moves his head right next to my ear, “You sure you want this, tell me when to stop”

I just nod and he flips me onto the car seat while pulling my skirt down and he pulls his pants down so he’s just left in his boxer- thank the lord his windows are tinted.

“Wait Vinnie one sec” I sit up and I undo my corset letting it fall off me along with my phone, airpods, and lighter which were held in my corset. 

“Jesus how do you not end up so uncomfortable when having your entire purse in your shirt?”, He chuckles while I just laugh and shake my head

I pull him in for a kiss while pawing at his shirt, “Mmph Vinnieee take your shirt off” I pout

“You're so bossy” He rolls his eyes but pulls his shirt off so I can move my hand across his chest and let it run along his toned body.

His head dips down to my tits and he starts leaving love bites all over them whilst I play with his hair but I’m getting really impatient

“Vinnie” I whisper, 

“Yeah doll” He replies

“You can be rough if you want” And as I finish that breathy sentence it’s like a spark ignites in him

He takes his cock out of his boxers and he pumps it up a bit and lines it up with my hole,“Oh can I now” and as soon as he finishes his taunt he slams his cock into me and sets an unrelenting pace.

Every thrust hits my deepest spots and makes my entire body loosen up. He hovers over me and presses chaste kisses all along my body and he focuses on my collarbones and shoulders biting and licking them, it's bound to leave marks for days.

His fingers finally find my clit and a pool of heat starts to form in my belly, his hands move in synchronicity with his dick, they go in circles and they press on my clit causing me to moan loud enough for people outside to hear me.

And that’s when I remember that we’re outside and if anyone walked past the car they would hear me moaning and the car shaking. 

I quickly use my hand to cover my mouth to prevent me from any form of embarrassment. But I’m quickly met with a sound of disapproval from Vinnie.

“Nuh-uh I want everyone to hear how much of a whore you are for me, my little slut” That almost sends me over the edge, the words turning me into putty, smooth enough for him to mold however he wants me. I’ve given up full control of my body at this point, his pinning my hands above my head and I’m not going to do anything to stop him.

He keeps rucking into me, while one of his hands is pinning my hands, the other one is leaving feather touches all along my body making me feel like I’m on fire- I really hope he doesn’t notice I’m burning up.

As he keeps pounding into me I arch into him trying to chase my own release. I’m starting to squeeze around him more and I know he can tell because he’s let go of my hands and places both of them on my hips putting enough pressure on there so we both know it's going to leave bruises.

The mixture of pure ecstasy of sex and the high of cocaine sends a rush od addrenaline into me. I’ve had sex high before but never with Vinnie and never with someone as good as Vinnie.

One of his hands leaves my hip and ends up next to my head caging me in. I’ve always loved his hands, they’re bigger than mine and when they flex over his steering wheel and how they almost cover my entire face,

I wonder what it's like to have them on my neck…

I want them on my neck

I need them on my neck

So I tilt my head back and bat my eyelashes up at him hoping he’ll figure out what I want, but luck is never in my favor and he doesn’t realize what I want, so I grab his hand and place it on my neck looking back up at him,

“Are you sure baby?” He whispers

“Please” I try to come off as reassuring but it just comes out breathy

That’s all the reassuring he needs and he quickly squeezes my throat. It feels so fucking good, I roll my eyes to the back of my head and arch into his chest, I don’t see stars all I see is him hovering over me with a dumb smile and I think that if I were to die right now I wouldn’t be opposed to it.

After what seems like an eternity of no air he lets go and oxygen floods into my body as I tip my head back.

I can see him chuckling, “You're such a slut oh my lord”, while he keeps thrusting into me.

I don’t know why but he picks up my legs and throws them over my shoulder so when he thrusts into me he’s hitting deeper into me and he hit the back of my cervix

I stumble out a collection of swears and moans and I’m so close to reaching my peak and Vinnie knows it it because he’s picking up his pace and circling my clit like his life depends on it,

“C’mon doll cum for me scream out my name” and that’s what tips me over the edge my entire body comes undone and I cum screaming out his name for everyone in the parking lot to hear letting my head rest.

He come not far after with a few more thrusts, he doesn’t slip out we both the lay there on top of each other just letting the moment sink in

His weight is on top of me while I brush through his hair. I relax a bit if I were to spend my whole life with Vinnie, would that be so bad?

[babydollmarauders]

KARMA— JACK HUGHES

jack hughes x fem!reader

part of the Midnights Fic List

summary: in which y/n’s ex-best friend has been gossiping behind y/n’s back saying that Jack should be with her instead, so y/n shows that karma goes both ways.

specific lyrics: “you’re talking shit, for the hell of it. addicted to betrayal.” and “ask me what i learned from all those years. ask me what i earned from all those tears.” and “karma is my boyfriend, karma is a god, karma is the breeze in my hair on the weekend, karma’s a relaxing thought”

warnings: toxic friendship mentions, light profanity

notes: this is pretty short, i didn’t feel like this one should be too long, i wanted it to be pretty simple just like the song

“did you hear about what Carley said last week?” i hear as soon as i sit down in my seat at brunch.

“no.” i shake my head. “what did she say now?”

“she was out with her friends, and Nicole and Jesper were sat by her at the restaurant; overheard her saying that Jack should be with her instead of you. apparently she’s convinced that he’s only pitying you and she deserves him because she’s ‘richer, prettier, and has more followers’.” Ryleigh says. “what a bitch! i can’t believe you were ever friends with her.“

“karma is a bitch, it’ll get to her one day.” i shrug. “she wasn’t much different when we were friends. claimed i ‘stole’ Jack from her because ‘she saw him first’, but he and i had already been dating by the time she saw him. we just hadn’t been public yet.”

“but, you’re literally the sweetest person i’ve ever met. i’m just saying, i don’t understand how you could’ve been friends with her for so long.” Darya chimes in, setting her mimosa down in front of her.

“i was friends with her since we were ten, she’s always been this way. a lot of my tears were from her hand. she insisted she would do things in the name of friendship and ‘bettering me’, but eventually, i learned that she was just a horrible person and i should stop excusing her actions. as i said, karma will get to her eventually.” i explain as i scan the menu in front of me. i know how Carley is. it doesn’t exactly surprise me that she’s talking bad about me, she used to do it even while we were friends.

“well, karma isn’t coming fast enough. that girl needs to be humbled soon.” Ryleigh exclaims and Darya nods in agreement. before i can respond, the waiter comes to take our orders and the subject changes.

**

i’m sat in glass seats at a Devils home game, waiting for them to come out for warmups. i switch between glass seats and the WAGS box every few games. i like hanging out with the girls but, i love to see the smile on Jack’s face when the Devils score. especially when he scores and he gets to look over at me and see that i watched and that i’m cheering for him. it’s not too long before warmups start that someone sits at the end of my row, and i look over to see Carley and one of her friends. i choose to ignore her and the looks i know she’s giving me. i have a right to be here, and she’s allowed to come to a game if she wants, i don’t control that. it’s when the warmups start that i have a problem with her. i’m looking down at my phone, texting Ryleigh when Jack skates by, banging a hand on the glass in front of me to get my attention. i startle, jumping in my seat and dropping my phone, and he laughs.

“hi baby!” i immediately recognize the voice yelling down the row. i look over to see Carley staring straight at Jack as he skates past her. he turns around, skating backwards and giving her a weird look before looking at me with a ‘what the fuck?’ face. i shrug my shoulders. what possessed her to make her think that calling my boyfriend ‘baby’ is okay?

i let the comment roll off my back, it’s whatever. i know that Jack has tons of fans, he’s talented, he’s hot, he’s sweet, he’s a total package, i get it.

“score a goal for me tonight, babe!” i hear her call out. that’s when my problem starts. and my anger only increases after warmups, when i overhear her talking to her friend. “eventually, he’s gonna realize how much better he can do than y/n. and i’ll be there with open arms when he does.”

i remind myself to stay in my seat. i’ve turned a blind eye to her glares, i’ve let her gossiping fall on deaf ears instead of making a scene or causing drama, and i know it’ll be worth it in the end. i was raised to remember that karma is a powerful thing, and that it goes both ways. you do bad things, something will knock you down a peg. you do good things, you’ll have good luck. it’s common sense. but apparently she didn’t get the message.

**

“babe, come look at this!” Jack calls to me from our bed. it’s officially the off season and Jack and i have been at the Hughes lake house for the past couple days. it’s been nice being surrounded by his family and even a few of our friends.

“what’s up, love?” i ask, walking out of the closet where i was picking out a cover up to wear out on the boat. i slip the sundress i chose over my head and pull it down over my bikini.

“come see what Bratter just sent me.” i flop myself down on the bed next to him, laying on my side and cuddling into him, an arm wrapping around his torso. he tilts his phone screen towards me and i read the text that Jesper sent him.

—

From: Jesper Bratt

took Nicole out to lunch and she pointed out a girl that she said is obsessed with you. said her name was Carley. heard her talking to someone, saying you guys were destined to be together 😂 even heard her say that y/n isn’t good enough for you? does this girl have nothing better to do?

—

“she really just won’t stop, will she?” my question is rhetorical but Jack answers anyways.

“she’ll get the message soon enough. i don’t want her.” his words make me furrow my brows but i nod anyways. “you ready to head out?”

“yeah, let’s go.” we stand from the bed, making our way out of the bedroom and down the stairs, meeting the others in the living room before heading down to the dock and onto the boat. i sit and watch as all the guys take turns wakesurfing, choosing not to participate and instead enjoying the summer evening air.

“babe! babe, c’mere!” Jack calls from the back of the boat, where he’s currently wakesurfing. i stand, walking over and bending over the back of the boat so i can hear him.

“look at you, superstar!” i chime, grinning at him. he laughs and shakes his head.

“no, i wanted to say that i wanna take you on a walk around the lake when we get back.” i admire his smile for a few moments, just nodding in response and watching his face all lit up with joy. this man makes me so happy.

i keep myself rooted in that spot until he decides he’s done and gets back on the boat, letting Luke take his place. he looks at me with a wicked grin and i know exactly what he’s planning to do, but the boat is only so big and he catches me quite easily. pulling me to him, getting me wet with the cold water dripping from his hair and body. i shiver and let out a squeal; halfheartedly attempting to push him away. i feel my feet lift off the ground as Jack moves over to the bench seats, sitting down and pulling me onto his lap.

“now my cover up is all wet!” i feign a pout, but all he does is laugh, placing a gentle kiss on the tip of my nose.

“i’ll make it up to you. promise.” he squeezes me tighter to his chest and i shuffle down in order to lay my head on his chest, getting the side of my face wet in the process, but i don’t care. “i love you.”

“i love you too.” i smile, turning my head slightly to lay a kiss on his chest.

*

when we park back at the dock, Jack lets the guys know we’ll be back up to the house soon and pulls his hoodie over his head. he slings one arm around my shoulders, holding me to his side, and sticks his free hand in his hoodie pocket. we continue to walk along the lakeside in silence, just enjoying the last moments of sunset and the sounds of nature. i stop Jack a few times in order to point out pretty birds or various other beautiful nature moments. i let go of him once more, stepping closer to the water and letting him fall behind me.

“Jack, look at the way the sunset is reflecting off the lake! it’s gorgeous.” i turn to look back at him, checking to see i have his attention, but when i catch sight of him, one knee on the ground with a ring box opened in his hands and a watery smile on his face, my hands fly up to my mouth.

“y/n, i texted Quinn right after i met you, telling him i just met the love of my life. at the time, i thought maybe i was over exaggerating, but then i got to know you, and i knew i wasn’t. these past two and a half years with you have been the best of my life, and i was hoping you’ll choose to continue that. y/f/n, will you marry me?” his voice wavers, laced with emotion, and tears spring to my eyes.

“yes. god, yes! a million times yes!” i exclaim and he takes my hand, slipping the ring in my finger as he stands and i pull him into a kiss. my hands hold his face to mine and he grips my hips. pulling away, i wipe the tears from his cheeks and then mine. “i love you so much.”

“i love you so much more, pretty girl.”

—

@itsmey/n just posted

Liked by @_quinnhughes and 26,372 others

@itsmey/n summer nights 🤍

karma is so good to me

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@user1 THEY’RE ENGAGED?! THIS IS SO EXCITING

@_quinnhughes congrats guys! welcome to the family y/n

@itsmey/n thank you huggy!

@user2 OMG!

@jackhughes my forever girl ❤️💍

@itsmey/n so grateful for you

@trevorzegras congrats you two! happy for you guys!

@itsmey/n thank you, z! better clear some time from your summer golfing schedule next year!

[spinningalbinoturtle]

The fellowship of the Kinsey scale aka LoTR characters ranked from most to least fruity

Btw this is a joke (well sort of) so don’t take any of my stereotype arguments too seriously. Although I do genuinely think most of these characters are gay.

1. Frodo- Frodo is gayest the character. He’s constantly described as queer, his deepest connection is with Sam and their relationship is incredibly romance coded. Plus he reads poetry all the time, wears his sparkly elvish top and that fall in Return of the King movie? Homosexual. Not to mention he has THE gay haircut. Man looks like a starbucks barista. Galadriel is his gay icon.

Sam- although more masculine than Frodo and also bi Sam has the second most Gay EnergyTM. He’s a bit overemotional he spends the entire series simping over Frodo and is obsessed with flowers and poetry. When his wife dies he leaves his kids to spend eternity with his husband and the elves. Gay behavior

Legolas- Legolas is a petty drama queen and I love that for him. Loves his dwarf husband. Just look at his hair-no straight man cares that much about their hair. Gay gay gay.

Gimli-a bear but in the dwarf way. Galadriel is also his gay icon. Loves his elf husband. Loves some sparkly diamonds and jewels. Lord of the GLITTERING CAVES you say? Sounds kinda fruity

Gandalf-he’s basically a minor god and thus does not conform to human ideas of sexuality and gender. Literally all the LGBTQIAs. Gandalf Big Naturals , Gandalf the Gay are just a few of this bitch’s many names.

Pippin-Y’all on this app have convinced me Pippin is not cis gender. I don’t know in what form trans, non binary, gender fluid? Honestly could be any one.

Merry-pansexual and very open about it. Just seems like a chill queer dude who smokes a ton of weed and is open to a relationship with anybody

Boromir-excessively emphasizes his straightness but has homoerotic battle moments and after battle showers with his comrades in Gondor. Very repressed bisexual

Aragorn- I think its funny if he’s the token straight but THE BIGGEST ALLY YOU WILL FIND. Literal king passes a bunch of laws enshrining LGBTQ rights cause all his friends are gay

Bonus

Faramir- is transfem and you can’t change my mind. Lesbian with her wife Eowyn. Has bi-to drag queen-to trans character arc.

Eowyn-butch lesbian horse girl and ya know what? We absolutely love her for it. After the war she has a buzzcut.

Bilbo-ace icon. I’M SORRY if you ship Bagginshield but I headcanon him as ace/aro. Hates the idea of sex but wanted kids so he adopted his gay little nephew.

[ohmymalice]

Lackluster Tendencies

jschlatt x f!reader | 674 words ! | part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4

high school au, sfw, "You don't seem to be the person I thought you'd be."

ALSO A QUICK NOTE BECAUSE I THINK THIS MIGHT BE CONFUSING!! I refer to Schlatt as Jay for his real name and Schlatt is his online username. His friends online call him Schlatt and friends in school call him Jay.

(blue text is schlatt grey is y/n)

He worried a little, thinking that maybe he used his little internet persona humor way too early into this friendship they had. The ringing of his phone filled his ears, the white screen suddenly faded into black and showed her name.

Y/n is calling... Pick up?

He lets it ring for a few seconds and picks up, his hands sweating a little.

"So when did you become a jackass?" she asked, teasing him for the unexpected response. "Always been one, just hid it well." She scoffed at his reply.

There was an awkward silence on the line, and before he could think, his mouth starts running before he could even make an effort to stop

"I didn't expect you to be this way," he mumbled out, fiddling with the phone in his hand.

"In what way?"

"Like- like.. all the cussing and shit, I thought you were just some pretty girl with an innocent face who seemed to be friends with everyone."

She snorted in response, chuckling. "So you thought I was just some girl with a pretty face?"

"Yes- fuck, I mean- I just didn't expect that you could be nice to someone like me, I guess? I didn't think you were an asshole or anythin' I just-"

"Thought I was one of those biased popular bitches who were only nice to other popular people?"

"Yeah, maybe it was a harsh assumption."

"Harsh but fair, and honestly? If we're talking about first impressions, I thought you were some quiet kid at the back of the class who might've turned out a school shooter if nobody talked to them."

Schlatt's jaw hung open, not expecting a joke like that to come out of her mouth. He just started laughing.

"THAT, that is what I mean by I don't expect you to be that way."

"Well, you're one of the first to know, congrats. I don't have a lot of close friends, friends yeah but anyone I hang around consistently? Not at all." Schlatt hummed in reply, getting the gist of things.

"I don't have as many friends as you, but I do get the whole, uh- the whole thing about not having a lot of close friends. I thought you had tons of friends, just assumed I didn't get to see you a lot, so I didn't get to see who you hung around a lot with either."

On the other line, the girl shook her head, giggling. Oh,  how wrong he was.

"I'd try to be close to the people I know but sometimes it's just draining, especially with my whole drama club stuff... and to be honest-" She trailed off, taking in a breath as she held the phone in between her shoulder and cheek.

"Shit- I don't even know how to put it into to words." She mumbled, he stayed quiet on the line, scared if he tried to say anything it would just make her feel worse.

"I guess I feel like not a lot of people would get me or like me. Not the little persona I put up. Shit I'm rambling, my bad." She mumbled out the last part, feeling like she overshared a little.

"I don't mind hearing you ramble." The words slipped out of his lips, thinking how lame and stupid he probably sounded.

She smiled, for the first time in a while. "Really? Most people would usually try to change the subject every time I got too real."

"Seriously, how could you even think anyone would be bored or not like you."

If anything, it was too easy to like her.

She was gonna interject, tell him how wrong he was and that he'd end up like everyone else. He'll end up walking away from her life and get bored the moment he realizes that there was nothing more to her but the door to her bedroom swung open and her dad started yelling, grumbling about something she couldn't understand.

Before even thinking, she ended the call

leaving Schlatt thinking he did something wrong.

[sunthyme]

Ah... welcome to another instalment of my headcanons. I lowkey lied again but I think my prefect will be the last of the headcanons to come out. Tyty for all the love, as always, and now...

🪶The NRC Staff🪶

Trying to find characters I hadn't already twisted for my student ocs to make my staff ones was such a pain 😭😭😭 but here they are!!

🐦‍⬛Dire Crowley🐦‍⬛

(he/it) - Bisexual

The most USELESS HEADMASTER EVER!!! God, I know his SSR card looks great but I won't pull for it istg this bitch. We could have had Sam or Crewel but nooooo...

- I wanted him to look a bit older but since we don't know his age, I didn't push it too much. No spoilers for book 7 but I assume he's probably fae or smth idk.

- You'll notice I honestly didn't change much about the staff in general but I do like most of their design already. Kept his sclera dark cause it looked cool and made the gold eyes pop.

- He talks in a weird mix of old language that literally no one uses, like hella old-fashioned, and poorly used teen lingo. He's trying... A for effort, ig.

- His house and office are super cluttered with a ton of stuff he's found throughout the years but knows exactly where things are. His memory's actually incredibly good, he's just lazy. He likes to collect teaspoons.

- Later in the story, when he starts kinda view the prefect as his kid of sorts, it starts dropping off little trinkets at Ramshackle. Various things from old photos to books with old annotations to pretty rocks. He just wants the prefect to make the dorm 'more homey'.

- I'll get into this more with my prefect design but when Crowley attended NRC (in my headcanon idk if he actually did), he was a Ramshackle student. As such, my MC is using his old uniform as he didn't have any extra ones.

- He really likes cats but they just fcuking hate him. Lucius hisses everything he see Crowley. This is why he cries himself to sleep.

Enough of my dead-beat dad, onto the good dad!

🐕Divus Crewel🐕

(he/they) Transmasc - Panasexual

The good father-figure!! I love Crewel. Also, ignore me misspelling his name in the big one, I thought it had two 'l's...

- He is my Mexican father. Idk they give like simultaneously abuelita and Mexican mom vibes and I am so here for it. (Apparently also Jewish grandma vibes according to @thearchiveofalexandria but I wouldn't know lol).

- I also think he'd be older, like late 40s/early 50s but because of those anti-ageing Mexican genes, they look like 30. (Literally, my mom gets mistaken for being that young, she's in her 50s) Gave him some gray hair at the back but don't be fooled, that's just from putting up with Crowley's bullshit. The shit that goes down in-game for sure results in a couple grey hairs for poor Crewel.

- Is the father figure I never knew I needed, well, my prefect anyway. I know my MC would go to him for anything ranging from 'Crowley's threatening to cut off my water supply!' to 'Can you help me make a Halloween costume?' and his ass always helps. Stan Papa Crewel.

Oh god, this next one was HELL ON EARTH I hate drawing masculine men...

🏈Ashton Vargas🏈

(he/him) - Heterosexual

God, I hate Vargas' og design. The worst part is it does it's job, I couldn't find much to change. Also, didn't even know he had a first name lmaooo.

- I gave him more of a beard because it looked so fcuking bad without it ong 😭😭😭 I hated this... that's pretty much all I did.

- That being said, I do think Vargas wants the best for his students. Wait. Dad-bod Vargas. Guys, I just had an epiphany.

- He's got a wife, kids in like elementary school, and like two dogs idk. I feel like he's older thirties. He's giving total family man and likes to cheer on his students like they're his kids too.

- I feel like he's got mad ADHD and it's one of the reasons he became a gym teacher, just to be constantly moving and doing stuff.

My opinion of Vargas has increased while writing this. Onto my funky uncle...

🏷️Sam Cecil🏷️

(he/they/it) Genderqueer - Asexual Aromantic

I LOVE SAM!!📢📢

- They're like mid-twenties, I don't know if they went to college but if they did, they were a business major. I gave him a last name too, idk the fact that he didn't have one made me mad. Cecil cause Dr. Facilier had a daughter named Cecilia apparently.

- I tossed in a couple more piercings and I love the idea that he has tattoos too.

- He's like the fun uncle that occasionally sponsor your weird ideas. Wanna make cookies at 3am? His store's still open. Need some Nerf guns? He's got 'em. If he says it's in stock, he will literally have anything. Don't ask, he won't answer you anyway.

- Also has crazy good like and low-key knows the future but typically drops hints in a joking manner. He's also very good at communing with the dead, sales for sessions are discounted in October.

- Incredibly rich. Probably canon given his store branches and the crazy shit he has in his shop but I felt the need to reaffirm it.

- Also supplies Ramshackle with snacks and groceries. My MC works at its shop part time in return but I firmly believe that it'd refuse to let the MC starve.

Now for the gramps,

📚Mozus Trein📚

(he/him) Transmasc - Heterosexual

- Trans old man, idk. He is to me. Also, he's both the history and literature teacher.

- Also changed pretty much nothing lol, he's just an old trans man whose sick of Crowley's bullshit (you'll notice a running theme).

- All the grandpa memes and stereotypes are so true for him. His drinks tea every afternoon, plays chess with Crewel (that's canon btw), and squints whenever you try to show him something, especially on a phone.

- He uses a flip phone mobile-y but his house has a rotary one. His daughters keep telling him to replace it but he refuses, saying modern one are too complicated. His daughters also went to Royal Blade as he originally worked there before recently transferring to NRC.

- Hates pumpkin-flavoured anything so doesn't care much for fall. Winter is his favourite season though as he loves sitting with Lucius by the window on snowy days and reading. Very academiacore, gramps.

- He totally advocated for NRC to allow students to use preferred names.

Onto the ocs!!

🪐Mèng yáo Yuan🪐

(she/they/it) Agender - Biromantic Demisexual

- First up is Mèng yáo, twisted from the Horned King from The Black Cauldron. Never seen it personally but @thearchiveofalexandria has and recommended I use its villain.

- She's Chinese and a fae of sorts so she's likely quite old, though she looks in her twenties.

- She's the astrology and philosophy teacher because I thought it would make for a good course since it's mentioned in passing in Book 4.

- She's also skilled in potionology and she and Crewel test out potions for Crewel to teach in class. She is intrigued by the concept of immortality but it's more of a passive study for her.

- She's really bad at getting jokes, though she tries. She's generally not too familiar with modern human concepts but does her best to learn.

Finally,

💎Kore Gorgon💎

(she/her) - Sapphic

- Kore is based on Madame Medusa from The Rescuers, which, fair warning, I ALSO haven't seen. I really needed villains though lol. I read the wiki page and prayed tbh.

- She's around her mid-fifties and is the Math and Physics teacher. She works to integrate known magical physics with standard math and physics and teaches such.

- Her wife is named Crystal (based on an inspo character for Madame Medusa) and they're Kyra's adoptive parents. This is a small nod to Madame Medusa having two pet crocodiles. Kyra kept her parent's names as a sort of way to remember them but likes her adoptive moms a lot too.

- Kore's name is a reference to another name for Persephone and is associated with not only 'the maiden' with the underworld as well.

- She loves shiny things and adores being dressed to the nines all the time. She has a small collect of pretty rocks and tends to decorate her classroom with various trinkets.

- She and Crewel get along super well as their personalities are rather similar. (Fun fact: Madame Medusa not only was heavily inspired by Cruella De Vil, but also served as an origin for Ursula's design.)

- She has bipolar disorder and does her best to work around it, sometimes having pre-recorded lectures if she's not able to be in person.

I'll be sharing my designs for some side and family characters tomorrow so stay tuned! Love y'all!🩷🩷🩷

[theothergal]

As the self appointed Marina Thompson's attorney, I want to talk about one of the scenes that people use to make her out to be this evil unsympathetic bitch.

I mean the scene in which she confronts Penelope about her feeling toward Colin.

People who like to shit on her for everything talk about this scene as if It was the meanest thing she could possibly do to poor Penelope.

But Is that thought?

First of all, I admit she was a bit harsh toward Penelope, she could have handled it better. I know she acts a bit dismissive of Penelope's feelings (which still doesn't justify Penelope revealing her secret to the whole Ton).

But regarding what she says:

"You love Is an unrequited fantasy. Colin sees you as you are and regards you no differently than he does Eloise or even little Hyacint. He sees me as a wife, a woman"

I mean, Is she...wrong? Because in that time, Colin DID see Penelope like a sister, he never treats her like a potential wife, as It would be expected, since she's a debutante and he's an eligible man. On the other hand, he's clearly interested in Marina as a romantic partner, and he makes it very clear.

I don't fault Marina for thinking like that, because It's the truth (for that time, of course).

Not even Anthony believed that Colin could be interested in Penelope, despite seeing her dance together, so why would Marina think otherwhise.

Marina simply states what Is true.

And the she adds:

"I must make these difficult choices for myself and for my child...even if they hurt you feelings"

Again, the wording Is a bit harsh, but that's the truth.

She doesn't take what she's doing lightly, she knows she's in a difficult situation, and the choice Is either hurting the feelings of a friend by marrying a boy that hasn't shown any romantic interest in her or ending up poor and shunned by society with a child to take care of and that's what she's trying to explain to Penelope.

You can understand what Is the inevitable choice.

And for those who say that Penelope was right to use Lady Whistledown to out Marina's secret because Colin didn't listen to her...she never said to him that Marina was pregnant. She said that she was in love with someone else, which Is a different matter. Love can change.

Had she said to Colin and Colin alone that Marina was pregnant, there was a high chance he would at least confront her. But there was also a chance that he would have decided to marry her nonetheless, that's why Penelope ruined Marina's name, so that Colin had no choice but to break the engagement.

[pookiepiss69]

CURTIS GANG BUT GENDERBENT HCS!!

(I was staring at a wall in 4 of my classes thinking abt this today)

Ponyboy

Bad bob final boss.

Stop it she's in that bad haircut phase (and it only gets worse)

Fast metabolism.

Wears all of darrys old clothes (cannot be fucked to change names)

Gets made fun of for not wearing skirts and stuff

If blud wears a skirt it is SO long.

Like past knees.

Tried to wear makeup to school once steve clowned her so bad

Like orange foundation.

Sodapop

Face card.

IMMACULATE

She'd be one of those beachy girls

THEY DONT EVEN LIVE NEAR A BEACH.

has a tan that everyone's jealous of

Doesn't wear skirts (face card is enough.)

Like she's wearing the baggiet things but her face makes up for it

eats a shit ton of sweets but NEVER gets fat

(Steve's jealous)

Has 0 routine for anything.

Darry

NASTY bitch slap

Y'all thought bro slapping pony was bad.

Like if she's out in public n someone catcalls blud is getting SLAPPED.

Tank top final boss.

Lil bro will not be caught anywhere without one

Jennifer tilly lookalike.

Has surprisingly long hair

It's like brown and shiny

TOO shiny.

Lash extensions.

Has KILLER legs

Like people would kill for them

Like not muscly or anything but like y'all know that one episode of teen titans were raven shows her leg.

That.

two bit

Raggedy Ann.

Fucking ginger with 2 plats

Freckles

Gap tooth.

Looks like a Wendy's logo

DOES NOT GIVE 2 SHITS ABOUT WHAT SHE LOOKS LIKE.

Wakes up, hair in plaits, eats, walks out the door.

Cheap wine enthusiast

Faded red nail polish

Naturally long lashes

Steve

Pushup bra final boss.

Rolled skirt final boss.

Like the dx has a uniform were you have to wear a skirt below the knee

NUH UHHH

Rolls that shit like there's no tomorrow

Has one of those complicated curly hair routines

Patchy fake tan. Like lit snow white in one spot and orange in another

Also has lash clusters.

Jealous of soda bc she is always thin

Lil bros insecure

'Fuck i should really go on a diet' *eats an entire chocolate cake*

LONG ASS FAKE NAILS THAT SHE COMPLAINS ABOUT

Take them off.

Really choppy fringe

Johnny

LONG ASS NATURAL LASHES.

everyone's jealous

Uneven hair (pony did it)

Long skirts.

Long sleeve shirts.

That typa vibe

Greasy hair

Sorry not sorry

no waist.

Like bro was in the wind, blew the shirt back and everyone qas like DAMNNN.

Dallas

Shitty bleach

Dead hair

Bad makeup

Still insists to use it

Maneater

Can SPRINT in heels

Leather

80s vibe

[rfxiii]

this is probably weird? but franklin clinton & lamar X black female reader but like separate ofc

idk like just making her feel more confident n pretty 😭 IDKK

This is not weird at all and honestly a really cute ask! I love it. Tysm for the request! 💕

*TW: none

Franklin Clinton & Lamar Davis (separately) with a black, female s/o:

(I thought it may be easier to convey my thoughts via headcanons. But if you’d have preferred me to write scenarios for both the guys I’d love to do that too! Just send me a request! 💕)

Franklin Clinton:

I honestly feel like Franklin would prefer a black, female s/o over any other s/o. Especially if he knew her from his neighborhood or if they’d gone to highschool together. He’d enjoy the shared background and coming from the same place (unlike if he’d met a s/o from the Vinewood Hills. I feel like he’d have a harder time relating to someone who didn’t understand where he came from.)

If you did go to highschool together he’d occasionally bring up how he’d always been into you, how beautiful he’d always thought you were. Even though he’s embarrassed about it he’d even tell you about all the times he’d used to practice asking you out in front of the mirror before chickening out once he saw you.

You could be in your pajamas, fresh out of the shower, no makeup, or full face and dressed to the nines. It does not matter. He thinks you’re the most gorgeous girl he’s ever seen and he’s going to let you know. It doesn’t even have to have horny vibes or be about your body. He’s talking about your voice, your smile, your laugh, how happy you look in the moment. You’re perfect to him.

The perfect hype man. He wants to sit back and watch you do a fashion show for him when you buy new clothes, he wants you to proudly show off to him how good your makeup looks, and he wants to receive tons of selfies. He probably has pictures of the two of you saved as his home and lock screen on his phone.

You’re getting random compliments all throughout the day: “Damn, baby girl.. How’d I get so lucky?”, “Shit! We can’t go out tonight with you looking like that. I can’t fight off every guy in LS that’s gonna wanna steal you.”, “Have I ever told you you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me?”

He likes to lay in bed with you on lazy mornings, holding you from behind and pressing kisses to your shoulder while he lists every single thing he loves about you.

If you’re ever having a bad day- maybe feeling down or low on self confidence and you ask him if there’s anything he doesn’t like, or anything he’d change about you. The only thing he’d ever have to say is, “Babe, only thing I’d ever wanna change about you is that you’d be able to see you like I see you. Then you’d always know how beautiful you are.”

He’ll off-handedly brag about you to his friends. He’ll show pictures of you to Lamar and look so damn smug when Lamar complains about not having a steady girl to be with. He’ll make little comments about how perfect you are to Michael when Michael bitches about his home life. He’ll even occasionally bring you around the guys if he knows nothing crazy is going down.

He buys you things that remind him of you- different jewelry pieces, your favorite flowers, perfume, or candies, he’s even tried to write a song for you before (he keeps that a secret though. He’s too embarrassed to show you).

Lamar Davis:

You’re his home and lock screen on his phone and computer. He keeps a framed picture of you by his bed. He’s even got a picture of you in his wallet and in the visor of his car.

He loves you so much he may just go the Trevor route and get your name tattooed on him.

He’s constantly posting you on social media, raving about how beautiful you are and how everyone else should be jealous of him. He honestly feels like you’re the most perfect girl he could have ever pulled. He’s still in awe of how he ended up with you.

“Goddamn girl! Look at you!”, “You get more and more fine every time I see you!”, “Babe, please stop looking so hot and shit! You got me losing my damn train of thought everytime I see you!”- he’s full of silly, loud, over the top compliments that he has saved for when you’re alone, or shouted full volume in front of people. He loves you, you’re beautiful, and he’s going to let everyone know.

Loudly brags about you to everyone he knows. Even people who have never met you are convinced you’re a goddess by the time he’s done describing you.

He always has his hands on you, complimenting your body and how much he loves the way you feel against him. He could spend hours doing nothing but telling you all the things he thinks are perfect about you.

He fell over himself once trying to open a door for you before you could do it yourself. If you try to open your own car doors he’s gonna close the door just so he can be the one to open it for you again. He’s goofy as hell but he loves you more than anything and it’s always going to be obvious that he does.

[bordysbae]

“you’re the only one who can calm him down” & “you cheated on me.” with mark estapa, maybe a misunderstanding happens?

“i’m all yours”

mark estapa x fem reader

warning: cussing, fighting, slight mention of blood

word count: 1.1k

you had been invited to your friend bella’s 21st birthday party. you guys met through multiple mutual friends, majority of which are the hockey boys. of course they got invited to this party too, and seeing how it’s a costume party you had asked mark to match costumes with you. but unfortunately, the guys decided to match, so you had to scratch the idea of a couples costume. you then decided to dress up as a sexy cowgirl, which ended up pissing mark off.

you’re currently wearing a very low cut white tank top, a pair of too tight jean shorts that slightly hug your ass, cowboy boots, and a cow-print cowboy hat. when mark saw your costume when he entered the party, he instantly told you how much he hated it and wanted you to change. you told him you couldn’t and that if he wanted to show you off as his, he would just have to stay by your side the entire night. mark being the petty guy he is, decided to give you silent treatment instead.

marks in the kitchen talking with mackie and nolan, and you’re talking to some of your friends holding a red solo cup in your hand. suddenly you hear someone call out your name from behind you. “y/n! oh my gosh you look so hot!” bella exclaims. “bella! happy birthday bitch! i haven’t seen you at all tonight!” you say pulling her into a big hug. you then notice the tall boy standing next to her, who appears to be around 5’11 or maybe 6ft. “oh i’m so rude! this is my friend ryan” bella says. “hi ryan, i’m y/n” “nice to meet you y/n” he smiles down at you.

you, ryan, and bella continue to talk for a few minutes until bella is pulled away by all of her other friends wishing her a happy birthday. you’re now standing awkwardly with ryan. you feel marks gaze burning into your cheek, so you turn your head slightly towards the kitchen, and you see mark glaring at you. mackie and nolan continue talking, assuming they still have marks attention. your gaze is snapped from mark back to ryan when he places his hand on your forearm. “so, how does a pretty girl like this you not have a boyfriend?” he asks you. before you can answer the question, someone else does for you. “she does.” mark says, slightly inching over ryan by 2-3 inches. “woah man chill, didn’t know she was taken. especially with how she’s dressed” ryan drunkenly chuckles. “oh that’s it, fuck you!” mark exclaims, before clocking ryan in the face with his fist. he continues to throw punches at ryan while he sloppily throws some back. quickly, nolan, mackie, and ethan appear pulling mark off of him, and drag mark into one of the bedrooms.

you’re stood there in shock, while everyone around you just stares at you or helps ryan. a few moments later, adam appears from behind you and places his hand on your shoulder. “y/n we need your help. please come try to calm him down, we’ve all tried to but he keeps threatening to punch us. you’re the only one who can calm him down.” “adam i’m the last person who he wants to talk to, there’s no way it’s gonna work right now.” “dude please, we gotta try. everyone’s tried to calm him down but it’s not working. he might need stitches but unless he calms down we can’t tell for sure.” “stitches?!” you cry out. “his lip is busted, please y/n!” after hearing about the possible need for stitches, you cave in, letting adam take you to mark.

you peak your head around the corner of the door, and see mark sitting on the edge of the bed. he notices your presence out of the corner of his eye and assumes you’re one of the boys. “just fucking go away!” he says looking up at you, his eyes going wide. “that’s no way to talk to your girlfriend huh?” you say, trying to lighten the mood. “nah nah nah don’t try and sugarcoat this shit, you’re barely even my girlfriend after all the bullshit you’ve pulled tonight.” “mark what? what are you even talking about? what ‘bullshit’ have i pulled tonight.” “you dress up in revealing clothes, knowing that it’s gonna piss me off that i cant show you off as mine in the way i want to, and then you go and start letting these guys flirt with you? you’re basically cheating on me” he scoffs. your mouth falls agape. “not my fault you decided to dress up with your friends! if you would’ve just let them call you a simp and dress up as a cowboy with me this entire thing would’ve been avoided! i don’t understand why you’re angry about a costume! and no mark, i’m not fucking cheating on you! you think i chose to date the 6’2 hockey player with anger issues, with intentions of cheating on him?!” you laugh.

mark gets off of the bed and begins to pace around the room. “im angry because y/n, i want people to know you’re mine, and if you let these guys stare at your tits, and stare at your ass, i’m gonna get angry. i know how the male brain works and best believe i saw at least 5 guys stare at your ass. the fucking things ryan was saying about you, that doesn’t piss you off? he said it in front of you too! i don’t get why you’re angry at me!” mark exclaims. you let out a deep sigh, “i’m not angry at you mark, i’m angry at the way you deal with your emotions. you didn’t need to fight him, you could’ve just like, i dunno, made out with me in front of him or something? you always resort to violence when you’re on the ice, you literally have the most penalties out of anyone! people seriously make signs before the games that say ‘free mark’ cause they know you’ll get a penalty” you chuckle. mark runs a hand through his hair, taking in the words you said. “i’m sorry for punching him, and i’m also sorry for being petty and giving you the silent treatment. i just want people to know you’re mine, and i don’t like when other guys look at you, wondering how to get you into bed. i’m sorry” he says, looking down at you. “mark i promise you don’t have to worry. i’m all yours. now, let me see that busted lip of yours.”

[thetimelordbatgirl]

What’s the point of the Isle if Red was born in Wonderland and not on the Isle? What’s even the point of Auradon Prep if there’s Merlin Academy with some of the villains and heroes going to school together? What’s the point???

"What's the point???"-A perfect summary of Disney Descendants nowadays. Seriously, the fact that they changed Red to having been born and raised in Wonderland when prior Descendants stuff alluded to the Queen of Hearts having been on the Isle...like what is the point of doing that??? Queen of Hearts could still be wanting to get revenge on Auradon even with Isle backstory, hell that might add to her reasons for revenge, since I'm pretty sure taking Wonderland People out of...well, Wonderland, would drive them insane as its the one place they thrive in and now they've been removed from it and are stuck in a prison and well...I can only imagine Queen of Hearts getting worser because of the Isle. (Seriously, even Ever After High addressed how wonderland people feel when unable to return to Wonderland, aka they feel lost and such in a world that isn't made to understand them...granted they also had the better Queen of Hearts design and better name for her kid but). There is literally no point to removing Queen of Hearts from the Isle and having Red born and raised in Wonderland beyond messing stuff up in Descendants even more (seriously, the prequel book could have been Red and her mom getting control of Wonderland back...not whatever you call the actual plot of the prequel book). Also they actually expect you to believe Red WITH the wonderland backstory, is somehow 'whip smart' and Chloe Charming is the naïve one...when I'm pretty sure the wonderland girl would be the naïve one actually while Chloe Charming would be the smart one??? Especially if Red somehow thinks the Isle was appealing just because it had no rules...

And Merlin Academy...oh one of the many banes of my existence...just...can we call it what it is: Ever After High rip off that also breaks a shit ton of continuity in Descendants??? Because similar to Ever After High, its a school that future heroes and future villains attend...that also leads to the fact that Descendants can no longer be based on the animated films like they claimed to be, because how the fuck would I dunno, Cinderella work if she attended the same school as Prince Charming??? Especially as animated Cinderella was put to work by her step family as soon as her dad died so there'd be no time for school??? How does Aladdin even work now when in the animated film, Jasmine has never been allowed out of the palace because of her over-protective father and has to sneak out and literally met Aladdin for the first time in the animated film...when according to Rise of Red, she and Aladdin BOTH attended school together and also dated in school, which??? HOW DOES THE PLOT OF ALADDIN WORK NOW THEN- and just, why the fuck is HADES of all bitches in the school??? Doesn't he have an underworld to rule??? Or is Disney gonna ditch mythology accuracy completely now??? And I guess Beast in Descendants got cursed as an adult if he attended a school, so rip that 'cursed as a child' implication from animated Beauty And The Beast- and lord, imagine your classmate in the future imprisoning your dad and you having to switch places with your dad, if Belle is attending the school as well. Maleficent....as long as its Leah and Stefen attending Merlin Academy with her I won't scream as much....if its Aurora and Phillip though, screaming time- and just, again, like Belle and Beast, Fay is just, I guess, seeing her classmate deal with family abuse and doing nothing for her when she's the classmate's future fairy godmother.

And also just because they apart of Merlin Academy: Morgie, son of Morgana Le Fay...where the fuck she been? Disney literally did not include her in Sword of The Stone, so where she come from? Also shit name for her son, not as shit as Red, but you know, its up there. Zellie, daughter of Rapunzel...third Rapunzel kid in Descendants lets go...but also hoping she's a time traveller because uh...how else is Razpunel's daughter in Merlin Academy with the future heroes and villains??? Ulyana...another sister of Ursula because using Morgana (Little Mermaid 2) was hard I guess...also comes with a 'whats the point' but a big one this time: what was the point of bating us with Dara Renee playing Chloe, only to reveal Dara is playing Ulyana and someone (with lighter skin tone then Dara) else is playing Chloe? What was the point of doing that beyond being iffy? And Hook...nothing to say on him...I just don't have anything on him, he's the least of Rise of Red's problems, he's just connected to one, aka Merlin Academy and the time travel plot (I'm not starting on that one because that'll be along ass rant...).

So yeah, like said: What's the point- perfect summary of Disney Descendants nowadays.

[whistlebrox]

i saw that you posted (or reblogged tf if I remember) Geto w/ top surgery scars and now I want to hear you infodump to me about it because I'm all for this hc/au/crack crazy idea now

(I need to be asleep rn but idg2f's)

Youdont understand how insane I am about geto being trans. It makes sm sense 2 me with him constantly questioning his morality and allat is so me coded. As a trans person, u always gotta question why everything is, everything needs an answer. It's mostly 2 confirm and validate urself and the world around u. Another thing, didn't bro kill his parents? Js sayin....kinda a mood for trans characters.... even tho ik he ain't canonically trans I still think about it alot. I have alot of hc and ideas but for the most part I wanna keep em locked up for a fic I'm gonna write. Geto as a character is rply important 2 me, so I'll give him the highest honor I can bestow upon him

....

FAG SHIT.

Alr tho but on a real note, hcs i have relating 2 geto being trans is....

Geto had 2 work his ass of in his 1st year 2 rid of his dead name and being assigned 2 lady dorms and uniforms. The first person he told about being trans was yaga, and yaga being as based as he is helped him get reassigned 2 male and all things associated with it.

He's allowed 2 use male changing rooms and bathrooms no problem, but he still avoids using em at all costs. He changes in the men's room and not in the lockers, and he doesn't use the bathroom unless ABSOLUTELY NESSESARY.

He worked out alot alot 2 get the body he wanted, but I like 2 think that he's insecure about his waist being so snatched, so that's why he wears baggy pants. Best way 2 cover curves is baggy clothes and hard work.

Another thing

Gojo don't know he's trans. He's completely clueless. And yeah six eyes does alot and all that, but he can only see the flow of CE around the area and others. It's not like he has x ray vision and can see that geto don't have a dick. So, for the most part, geto is in the clear. Geto goes great lengths 2 avoid anything relating being shirtless or talking about his body when it comes 2 gojo. The 1st ine for obvious reasons and the second one in fear he'll say something that might give him away. He's clear since gojo doesn't have a lot of interest in working out or perving on people in the first place. It's not like gojo wants 2 see him naked or anything so yk.

Ofc at some point during 2nd year he told shoko about being trans only bc he forgot his pad and all the sudden it was THAT TIME OF THE MONTH. randomly in class it started but geto had totally forgot 2 prep and that he got periods in the first place. Shook didntcare and that didn't really suprised him, but he was still scared bc he thought "a pretty girl like shoko might be stuck up, and she's not one 2 soften up her opinion just because she's talking to a friend." (Objectively pretty girl = probably the most rude lady he'll ever face, and gojo also has this fear with women but times 10000)

I like 2 think that the higher ups are kinda bitches about the whole trans thing so they try and stop people from being able 2 have a smooth transition unless they have parental support. (Which for geto was awful but he alr had done all the shit before they started enforcing that rule. It didn't end up applying 2 him but it stressed him out a shit ton.)

He also prefers 2 deal with his injuries alone since it's easier for him 2 get undressed and deal with it himself without prying eyes. Gojo hates this since I like 2 think he wants 2 help geto with everything (in an annoying insufferable way).

Ok yap over lemme know if u wanna hear more hc. This is extremely unstructured yapping so none of this is in order dawg 🙏💀

[just-sp-in-inginthevoid]

@thehaikuman here it is! Thank you again for agreeing to help me :]

All of what I translated so far under the cut

Bold text means I'm not sure of the word(s) I used (except for the 'bald', that one is on purpose bc it's funnier that way)

Asterisks mean it's an alternative; that I'm not sure between two translations

Slashes mean I don't know what to put, so I didn't put anything (for now)

01:17 – At last, after nearly 6 months of absence, they finally pull their fingers out

[NEWS: Those slacker from Re: Take are finally back · Diabl0x9: He’s finally back on OnlyFans]

01:21 – nobody believed in it anymore!

[NEWS: Those slacker from Re: Take are finally back · Diabl0x9: He’s finally back on OnlyFans]

01:22 – The big fat worm here, that’s me – Takemichi Hanagaki

[NEWS: JDGate: The corpse of the ex-body double of the man with the Hawaiian shirt found in a canal (reference to one of the most famous French youtuber, ‘Joueur du Grenier’ (‘player from the attic’) also known as ‘JDG’]

01:26 – 26, single, and invisible like air

01:29 – Now for the news,

[NEWS: St Valentine: if you want to spend the day with Leo TechMaker, does Leo ‘Take my heart’?]

01:31 – a huge ‘Serves you right!’ for the Tachibana family

01:32 – their daughter Hinata got fucked over really good as they say

[NEWS: “Do we hear me right in the sound controls? In how long are we live? Oh yes, I’d like a bit of water”, Emmanuel Macron’s declaration shocks the opposition]

01:34 – their daughter Hinata got fucked over really good as they say

[A NON-TACHIBANAL CASE: the chick is dead.]

01:36 – but it’s okay, at least no man died, it was a woman

[NEWS: The case of Feldup fell down: How did the young man trip up on his bathroom rug? (Feldup is a French youtuber)]

01:38 – we’re not going to make a big deal out of it.

01:39 – –Ah, wait!

[NEWS: Billy, the end of his carrier: Was this Arab truly so determined? (play of word bc his channel name can be translated as ‘DeterminedArab’)]

01:40 – someone tells me through the earpiece that her little brother, who’s a man, is dead

[THE COUNTRY GRIEVING: A man died]

01:44 – In this case, it’s a tragedy – a national tragedy, the whole country is shaken

01:47 – We are truly distraught, we wish good luck to the Tachibana family

[ALERT: Takemichi elected the most beautiful ass of the year according to the last survey of IFOP (French Institute of Public Opinion(that’s a real institute))]

01:49 – – but also good riddance.

[ALERT: Re:Take followers elected best community in the world]

01:50 – (announcer voice) It was misogy-news!

X

01:51 – I feel deeply saddened.

01:53 – Is it because I watch right-wing news

[(the tv news was a parody of a real French tv news)]

01:54 – or because the only woman I’ve ever loved just got squashed in a wall by a 36-tons truck in a very graphic way?

01:59 – Where am I going? Where am I running-ing? Where is it leading me-ing?

02:01 – I’m really in a standstill. If only someone could push me to–

02:05 – I instantly regret choosing those words!

X

02:09 – Unbelievable. I’m not dead.

02:11 – Fuck it, what’s this look? I changed my mind actually I wanna die!

02:14 – Takemichi, you get your ass moving? –Ah? Yeah! Coming!

02:17 – If I understand correctly, I time jumped

02:19 – It’s 2005, 12 years into the past

02:20 – I’ll use the lotto numbers and become rich!

02:23 – No, I don’t have the lotto numbers

02:24 – Well scratch that. What striking thing happened in 2005?

02:32 – Right, make a fortune is out. But no big deal, everything was going well in 2005, I was the neighborhood king!

X

02:35 – You’re the neighborhood little bitch!

02:38 – So that’s what we call ‘selective memory’…

02:39 – Don’t make this face, Takemichi. It’s going to be okay.

02:42 – Thanks you, Akkun.

02:43 – I swear, you’re unique dude, there’s only one like you

02:45 – Stop it, you don’t mean it

02:47 – I do, I swear. You didn’t listen to what that guy said? You’re…

02:49 – The neighborhood little bitch!

02:52 – Takemichi, come back! We’re going to the cybercafe to pay a huge amount of money to spend 5 minutes on the Internet!

02:56 – What great times to live in!

X

02:58 – What shitty times. Except for the games and movies which came out this year

03:00 – Not kidding, I’m talking directly to the viewers: go check all the crazy stuffs that came out between 2004 and 2005. Even so –

03:05 – What shitty times.

03:06 – I should still take advantage of the situation to go see Hinata

03:09 – Hi, Takemichi. What’s wrong? You don’t look well.

03:11 – Forget it, Hinata. I think today is the worst day of my life

03:14 – You got hurt? Come here, I’ll kiss it all better.

03:17 – I have to save this girl, marry her, succeed my studies and buy a Honda

03:22 – Fuck, I’m so happy! I’m really starting to understand why my therapist told me I’m bipolar–

03:25 – And so it makes me sad.

X

03:26 – I feel deeply sad. I feel like my life is going nowhere

03:30 – Anyway, it was really nice to have offered to listen to me!

03:33 – I didn’t offer anything. I was swinging, you racketeered me ten bucks and you demanded that I listen to you or be subject to consequences

03:38 – You’re really a nice guy, Naoto.

03:39 – Leave me alone, please

03:41 – Listen closely, I have to tell you something. You’re about to die.

03:43 – No! Wait! I listened to you like you requested even if it was really fucking boring!

03:47 – I don’t have any money left but if you want I have a Chelsea bun crushed in my bag!

03:49 – That’s not what I meant to say!

03:51 – Wait, a Chelsea bun? Nobody eat Chelsea bun

03:53 – And what do you mean ‘fucking boring’?!

03:55 – Anyway.

03:56 – You’re Hinata’s little brother, right? In twelve years, your sister and yourself will be targeted by a gang and unfortunately, you both die

04:02 – That’s terrible!

04:03 – I know. And you believed me very easily.

04:05 – Naoto. You have to become a police officer, you’ll be capable of protecting your sister that way.

04:08 – Okay!

04:09 – You’re really believing me very easily

04:11 – Well then, make the most of it to become rich. Think about investing all your money in–

04:15 – Wait. Come closer. Invest all your money in *caws makes it impossible to hear what is being said*

04:18 – Ok, Takemichi.

04:19 – Great! Good luck, Naoto

X

04:22 – Takemichi. I did all of what you told me. Unfortunately, Hinata didn’t survive

04:25 – But I did it, I officially work for the police and we’re going to be able to work together to save my sister!

04:28 – That’s great news!

04:30 – And by the way, ‘investing all I have in sporks’? really?!

04:34 – You couldn’t have told me to buy BitCoin?!

04:35 – No, it pollutes

04:36 – Do you really want to become a megalomaniac multimillionaire?

04:38 – Yes.

04:39 – Who owns a luxury cars company?

04:40 – Yes!

04:41 – A space rockets company?!

04:42 – YES!

04:43 – I get it. I’m sorry, I didn’t know what BitCoin was…

X

04:45 – Mission: save Hinata

04:46 – Let’s recap the situation:

04:47 – The entire city is under the influence of the Tokyo Manji kai,

04:49 – a sprawling mafia whose bosses have eyes everywhere

04:51 – Don’t take it in the literal sense,

04:53 – they both only have two eyes.

04:54 – And by ‘them both’ I mean those two:

04:56 – His name is Manjiro Sano, also known under the name ‘Mikey’

04:58 – as for him, it’s Tetta Kisaki.

05:00 – Between us we’ll call him ‘fucking bastard, shitty low-down dog’

05:03 – Excuse me for that. I watched the rest of the series, and you’re going to understand –

05:05 – he’s a fucking bastard. – If you say so

05:06 – Before I explain my plan, do you have any question?

05:08 – I do.

05:09 – First, I love your skin texture, may you give me the name of your day cream?

05:12 – And, thennnnnnn

05:14 – How did you succeed to take pictures this close to them, no jokes?

05:16 – [Reference to a running gag of the comedic duo ‘Palmashow’]

05:20 – I can see you.

[Reference to a running gag of the comedic duo ‘Palmashow’]

05:21 – Ninja!

[Reference to a running gag of the comedic duo ‘Palmashow’]

05:25 – I can see you!

[Reference to a running gag of the comedic duo ‘Palmashow’]

05:31 – I can see you!

[Reference to a running gag of the comedic duo ‘Palmashow’]

05:40 – I can see you.

[Reference to a running gag of the comedic duo ‘Palmashow’]

05:45 – Dude, get the hell out of my house, for real.

[Reference to a running gag of the comedic duo ‘Palmashow’]

05:46 – (muffled) Ninja!

[Reference to a running gag of the comedic duo ‘Palmashow’]

05:47 – I have my methods.

05:48 – Takemichi. You have to prevent Tetta Kisaki from corrupting the Tokyo Manji kai.

05:52 – You have to prevent him from meeting Mikey, no matter the cost.

05:54 – It’s because of

05:55 – – this fucking bastard –

05:56 – of Kisaki if the gang became that violent nowadays

05:58 – But how could I recognize him?

05:59 – Who is that, Kisaki?

06:00 – Don’t worry about it, you can’t miss him, you can smell the bastard at 20 miles

06:03 – Okay. We’ll do it, Naoto.

06:05 – We will save Hinata!

06:07 – See you 12 years ago!

06:09 – (whining) Oh no, damn it! My punchline was great, why isn’t it working?

06:12 – Your hands are really soft. Is it the same cream you use for your face?

06:15 – It was already awkward, you just made it worse

06:16 – Perhaps if you tighten your grip a bit more…

06:19 – Ouch! I say ‘a bit more’, you’re truly a jerk!

X

06:20 – (crowd shouting in the background)

06:21 – (crowd shouting in the background)

What did you sAY

06:23 – (crow shouting in the background)

You want me to smash your fACE IN?

06:24 – (crow shouting in the background)

You’re nuts!

Takemichi: oh, no… It looks like it’s gonna be a very long day…

06:27 – 🎶Takemitchi gets his ass beat all the time🎶

06:30 – 🎶It’s truly not pleasant🎶

06:33 – Kiyomasa: Can’t hear your bigmouth anymore, UH?

06:34 – 🎶Is this girl worth loosing one’s teeth?🎶

06:37 – 🎶Frankly, I would have scram a long time ago🎶

X

06:41 – So? Not so clever now, eh?

06:43 – In my opinion, you’re the one who’s not clever

06:44 – Wh– No, it’s him!

06:45 – Over there… There!

06:50 – Hi

06:53 – [Mikey

“Hi.”]

06:54 – What’s your name?

06:55 – Takemichi

06:56 – You sure have a good nerve, Takemibitch

06:58 – If you don’t laugh I’ll turn your mother into an NFT

06:59 – (forced laughter)

07:00 – Did someone already tell you you were the (both:) neighborhood little bitch?

07:03 – Yeah, yeah, I know

07:04 – Come with me, we’re going to do real Japanese thugs’ stuffs

X

07:06 – *ding-ding*

07:08 – You see it, all the violence? That’s what the real hood is about

07:11 – Wow, I’m bowled over by it (sarcasm)

07:12 – (reference to a French TV station)

(stereotypical voice-over) To go for a ride by the bank of a river

07:15 – (stereotypical voice-over) talking about friendship, wind in the hair

07:17 – (stereotypical voice-over) while admiring a setting-sun...

07:18 – (stereotypical voice-over) A real atmosphere of TERROR in the land of the raising sun.

07:22 – You know Takemiwhine, I respect you a lot

07:23 – (not believing it) Oh really?

07:24 – You’re someone admirable

07:25 – (still not believing it) Yeah?

07:26 – You’re like a brother to me

07:27 – uh-huh

07:28 – And in the gang, we brothers love each other very muchhhhhhhh

07:31 – (starting to get fearful) And what does that mean?

07:32 – Take out your takemidick

07:34 – eh?

07:35 – nooOOOOoooOOOOOOO

X

07:36 – It’s all good, Naoto! I did it!

07:37 – That’s great! So it’s over?

07:39 – Yeah, I did it, I screwed your sister!

07:41 – eh?

07:42 – You saved my sister

07:44 – I- s-

07:45 – saved.

07:46 – Yeah. Yeahyeahyeah

07:47 – I, I, I saved her. I saved her all properly.

07:51 – But I forgot my keys back there

07:52 – You can’t forget an object in a time travel!

07:53 – oh boy, I’m going to miss my time jump– (play of word with ‘sauter’=jump, screw. ‘I’m going to miss [the opportunity of] screwing your sister)

07:55 – [second take, let’s try again]

07:56 – Takemichi, you’re back?

07:57 – Yes. And I have bad news.

07:59 – First, Hinata is dead, that didn’t change

08:01 – And second, my keys are, oh my! completely lost (chuckles)

08:03 – True. Hinata’s still dead

08:05 – We don’t have the choice, we’re going to investigate

08:06 – Do you recognize him?

08:07 – Is that Akkun? What a huge pompadour

08:09 – Puberty doesn’t help everyone

X

08:11 – Oh fuck, it’s worse than on the picture I haven’t been that disappointed since my last Tinder date

08:13 – Excuse me?

08:14 – It’s not to me you own apologies.

08:16 – You own apologies to yourself to have inflicted this look on you

08:18 – excuse me?

08:19 – STOP apologizing all the time, it’s tiring

08:21 – Why are we on the roof?

08:22 – I’m sorry Takemichi.

08:26 – –I’m taking back what I said, apologize.

08:23 – Would you stop apologizing, dammit?!

08:25 – I’m the one who pushed you under the train

08:27 – It’s because of this Tetta Kisaki bastard. He forced me to do it

08:30 – What? He threatened your family?!

08:31 – Well there’s that…

08:32 – And he handed me a huge check

08:33 – I thought we were friends!

08:35 – Yeah, friends among other things…

08:37 – but you didn’t call often, the check was really big

08:39 – But since you busted me, I have remorse now

08:40 (sad music starts to play)

08:41 – Takemichi, I always loved my friends as if they were my brothers

08:43 – (sad music stops) ‘as if they were my brothers’ actual brothers, or…?

08:45 – (naive) like brothers.

08:46 – Whew.

08:47 – Do you want me to yell out my love for you?

08:49 – Yell out your love for me?

08:50 – Yeah.

08:51 – AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

08:54 – OH MY GOD

08:57 – MY CAR (starts crying)

X

09:00 – I think the investigation is going...

09:01 – -very fast?

09:02 – Not at all. I don’t know how you work things out. You’re the most incompetent man that I’ve never seen

09:04 – yipee…

09:05 – Okay, since visibly I’m talking to Einstein, I’ll explain everything to you again

09:08 – Mikey is being manipulated since Draken’s death

09:10 – He was the only one who succeeded to contain Mikey’s anger

09:12 – So, to avoid the corruption of the Tokyo Manji kai, you have to…

09:15 – sleep with your sister!

09:16 – There it goes…

09:17 – –what you shouldn’t be saying. Why?

09:19 – Well I don’t know

09:20 – When I, I do know

09:21 – I love Pierre Niney in ‘La Flamme’ [French reference. French actor & French comedic series – one of his line is “when I, I do know”]

09:22 – Let’s go, Takemichi! You have to go save Draken!

09:24 – Screw Draken!

09:25 – NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

09:28 – No.

09:29 – You’re not a fun person.

09:30 – If my intel is exact, exactly 12 years ago from now, Mikey and Draken got into a fight

09:35 – That’s probably what caused the split of the Tokyo Manji kai and soon after: Draken’s death

09:39 – Your mission if you accept it

09:40 – – and you don’t have any other choice –

09:41 – [gasp]

09:42 – It’s to go do everything you have to to avoid this dispute

09:43 – A street fight between two gang members, how does it look like?

X

09:46 – [western soundtrack] Well, well, well, isn’t it the little runt?

09:49 – It doesn’t smell too much like feet when you’re 110 centimeters tall?

09:51 – You speak a lot, tall string bean

09:52 – I spoke to your girl, it seems the dragon on your temple is to compensate for the one you don’t have in your pants?

09:56 – thEy’rE BLoWing a fUsE

09:58 – How violent! Someone call the police!

10:00 – Guys! Stop!

10:02 – Have you look at yourselves, really?

10:03 – You are slaves of a system where people see each other without looking at each other,

10:06 – hear each other without listening to each other!

10:07 – There’s only war and conflict. Always war!

10:10 – Couldn’t we just stop to fight each other for five minutes?!!

10:12 – Woaw, Takemichi, what you just said that’s…

10:15 – That’s so boring I forgot what we were yelling at each other

10:17 – Real. Let’s go drink a bier while smoking a good colombian cigarro

10:20 – We’re minors, dude

10:21 – Real. Let’s go drink a caprisun and eat cotton candy at the amusement park

10:24 – We’re in the hood, bro.

X

10:25 – I’m cold, Takemichi

10:26 – ah okay, without any transition

10:28 – Listen. I believe it’s the right time.

10:29 – If you have things to tell me, things to confess…

10:31 – Whatever you have in your heart, I’m ready to hear it

10:33 – Well, everybody insinuates you’re my girlfriend since the start, including in front of you, so… That’s not really a secret, is it?

10:38 – We all have secrets, Takemichi

10:39 – Yes, but that one is not one

10:41 – Kiss me.

10:42 – Oh my god, that’s real, that’s happening!

10:43 – And Naoto is only a little brat who can’t cockblock me!

10:45 – This time I’m going to s–

10:46 – [ringtone. The song is called ‘Time Time’ ;p]

10:48 – Hello?!

10:49 – [Naoto:] –ave. [Takemichi:] What?

10:50 – You’re going to sAVE her.

10:51 – Naoto, you’re calling me through time and space now?!!?!

10:52 – When it’s my sister we’re talking about, I don’t joke around at all, dude

10:54 – Alright…Saving Draken, not touching your sister

10:57 – THANK YOU.

10:58 – [jinggle] Particularly since she’s super minor

X

11:00 – Back to the mission, we’re going to save Draken!

11:02 – –Stab Draken.

11:03 – Dude, you already told me on the phone!

11:04 – Yeah? Well I say it again,

11:05 – in case an eventual watcher would want to make the intrigue of an anime in which he’s the protagonist going

11:09 – Uh… You’re asking yourself some really meta-physic questions, bro

11:11 – Yeah, I have anxiety disorders, I sleep bad at night, my hamster is sick, his name is Crumbs

11:15 – Okay, I have to follow those guys without getting caught

11:17 – Where I am, I’m literally undetectable

11:18 – All I have to do is remain discreet –

11:20 – Guys, I found a dude behind the poleeee

11:21 – Wuahhahahha

X

11:22 – Shitty pole, shitty Draken, everything’s shitty, I’m tired of this shitty life!

11:27 – Takemichi, is it you?

11:28 – Shitty Hinata!

11:29 – I love you, Takemichi

11:30 – Lovely Hinata.

11:31 – I saw what those boys did to you, it’s terrible

11:33 – I’m weak, Hinata…

11:34 – Takemichi, you know…

11:36 – It doesn’t matter if you’re not like Mikey and Draken

11:38 – True, they are…

11:40 – A lot more handsome, strong, smart, powerful, charismatic

11:42 – Great.

11:43 – Yeah, great, too

11:44 – Wondrous!

11:46 – It’s ‘wonderful’, dummie. And they are too, but you see Takemichi, the one I chose is you.

11:50 – I have a kink on ugly people.

11:51 – Ah.

11:52 – Huge victims, bleach blond guys who whine all the time, tied-up in the mud like big losers! I like that a lot!

11:57 – Uh… thanks a lot

11:58 – Really, what a loser.

11:59 – [Takemichi chuckles bitterly] What a sucker! [Takemichi: great!]

12:00 – What a failure [Takemichi: it’s getting long] Your mom have to regret you so much!

12:02 – Stop pushing it, shut up!

X

12:04 – Draken, beware those guys want to kill you!

12:06 – Is that so? They aren’t here to play Uno?

12:07 – What make you think that??

12:08 – The fact there’s fifty of them?

12:09 – the baseball bats?

12:10 – or the fact they already beat the shit out of me, ASSHOLE?!!??!?

12:12 – You just all collectively decided to bust my balls today or what?!!

12:14 – Don’t worry, I’m here!

12:16 – [Mikey

“Nobody has to worry, he’s here.”]

12:17 – And above all, I have a plan!

12:19 – [Mikey

“And above all, he has a plan.”]

12:20 – So you’re Mikey

12:21 – [tries to kick Hanma’s face, fails]

12:23 – OK, I don’t have a plan anymore!

12:24 – [Takemichi] Your plan was just to kick him in the jaw?!!?!

12:26 – [Mikey] I’m a lil vandal from the neighborhood, not a military strategist

12:28 – [Toman] Don’t worry, guys!

12:31 – [Takemichi] Oh wow! The Tokyo Manji kai is entirely here!

12:35 – Uh… And so? What do we do?

12:37 – [Mikey] Well I don’t know. Uh... There are rules to start? Or a turn of phrase that I could use to start this confrontation?

12:44 – Fuck ‘em up!!!

12:45 – Thanks, I’ll remember it!

X

12:49 – Wait I have another plan to stop this massacre!

12:51 – I’m going to show them my powers

12:54 – Come here, you

12:55 – Uh, what the fuck are you doing, let me go!

12:56 – Shhh, relax yourself, your eyelids are heavy

12:59 – What the fuck is he doing?

13:00 – Think of a sound that soothes you like…

13:01 – A fork scratching against a plate!

13:03 – It doesn’t relax me at all, I want to punch someone

13:05 – [Draken:] Mikey for the fiftieth time this week, you are not a hypnotist!

13:08 – Wait, I’m sure he’s thinking of the number 5!

13:10 – That’s mentalism, not hypnotism!

13:12 – Yeah, and sorry but I was thinking of the number 7

13:13 – Shit.

X

13:14 – I have to find Draken!

13:15 – I know my therapist tells me I’m paranoiac but I’m convinced that a protagonist from a manga published in the weekly shonen jump magazine is observing me.

13:21 – And so I’m going to announce out loud what I just did.

13:23 – I stabbed Draken~

13:25 – DRAKENNNN!!!!

X

13:27 – Well frankly I’m fine

13:28 – You must be joking, there was 2 litters of blood on the ground

13:30 – Well if there’s 2 out it leaves 3 inside

13:32 – It’s… Factually correct

13:34 – It’s more than enough to vascularize my two enormous balls

13:35 – …

13:37 – Okay.

13:38 – And when will you be able to walk again?

13:40 – Well here, right now

13:41 – Ah, great

13:42 – And you know what, the guy may have stabbed me in the stomach but my digestive system is still intact, watch this-

13:46 – Draken!

13:47 – One second- – Draken!

X

13:48 – Takemichi, you saved Draken!?

13:49 – I don’t know if that’s exactly like that I’d say it but–

13:52 – YOU SCREWED DRAKEN?!!???!

13:53 – That’s not what I meant!

13:55 – Either way, I have good news for you, Takemichi

13:56 – Hinata!

13:57 – Takemichi!

13:58 – Enjoy it! [whisper:] It’s not going to last

13:59 – What?

14:00 – Let’s go, it’s time for the date! Have a nice evening!

14:01 – [whispering] It’s going to be short [Hinata:] What?

X

14:02 – This date is so romantic

14:04 – I love being left to gather dust for thirty minutes alone in a car

14:07 – Well… I’m going to put some music…

[the soundtrack is a famous short French song where children ask their father to push on the ‘mushroom’/throttle pedal if he’s a ‘champion’]

14:14 – [GAME!]

14:16 – Hinata, NO!

14:17 – Quick, get out of here!

14:18 – I don’t get out of here before the release of What The Cut 38! [a series of videos well-known and legendary of French Youtube. Stopped years ago after episode 37. Some people are still asking for more despite the creator’s refusal]

14:20 – Hinata, you can’t reasonably stay in an ablaze car for eternity!

14:24 – Well if that’s the case, not before Michel Drucker’s death! [well-known French TV presenter. Has been doing his job for years, still isn’t retiring. French equivalent of Elisabeth II (until she died at least)]

14:25 – Be realistic, it’s never going to happen!

14:28 – He’s almost 80 years old! Maybe at the moment people are watching this video he’s already–

14:30 – Shh, shh, shh. Listen to me closely

14:32 – You speak ill of whoever you want, but not my Mich-Mich, ‘kay?

X

14:34 – [bored voice-over] We today weep for Hinata Tachibana’s death

14:36 – Well, you cry, I personally don’t give a shit

14:38 – [Takemichi thinking] I’m sure there was better picture of her

14:40 – Fate persists, I wonder what may have killed her

14:42 – Well the truck that charged into her, isn’t that what you told me?

14:45 – Ah, yeah, yeah, that, the truck… [the joke is that he choked her in the car for speaking ill of Michel Drucker]

14:46 – If Draken’s death isn’t the problem it means it comes from somewhere

14:49 – No kidding…

14:50 – We don’t have any choice left, we have to get rid of the source of evil, we have to stop of Tetta Kisaki

14:54 – How can we do that?

14:55 – Honestly,/

14:56 – Liar, you’re not even /

14:57 – I’m going to /

14:58 – That’s what is called a pleonasm,

14:59 – /

15:00 – Well, fuck it, I have no more idea, manage by yourself so Kisaki does not go up in the Tokyo Manji kai hierarchy.

X

15:06 – Congrats, Tetta Kisaki, you go up in Tokyo Manji kai hierarchy!

15:07 – [Takemichi] You must be kidding me!!!

15:09 – No, I’m not. For example, there I am: Where do biscuits go to dance?

15:13 – [random Toman member] To the bisco club!

15:14 – [Mikey, whining] That’s not fair, they already knew it…

X

15:15 – Tetta doesn’t seem to be joking around...

15:17 – He’s truly scary

15:18 – Murderous look, eyebrows shaped like devil horns, small earring…

15:21 – Dude’s well-groomed

15:22 – In reality I could go stab him right at this very moment and take care of the problem!

15:25 – [punch & pain sounds]

15:27 – But no! We are going to get into a ‘peace&love’ plot, without violence, without going overboard, without doing anything!

X

15:30 – It’s time to get crazily violent

15:32 – This bastard, Baji left to join Walhalla

15:34 – What? He died a true viking while doing honor to Odin?

15:36 – Not at all, that’s the name of the gang opposite

15:38 – It’s too complicated, there’s too many gang…

15:40 – It’s the series principle: war among gangs

15:41 – You think that’s what we call a ‘Gang Bang’?

15:45 – … Anyway, bring me Baji back

X

15:46 – Hi. Kazutora.

15:47 – What do you mean ‘Kazugotya’? Who’s he? He’s following me? Who’s that ‘Kazu’?

15:50 – Nah, that’s my name

15:51 – Your nana?!!

15:52 – You’re really gonna have to make an effort here, bro

15:53 – Uh, Where are you bringing me to?

15:54 – Don’t worry, we’re going to check on some friends

15:55 – [Chifuyu’s sounds]

15:58 – It… It does check hard

16:00 – Get in.

16:01 – No… Thanks

16:02 – Get in.

16:03 – [Takemichi whining+Chifuyu’s sounds]

16:04 – Do you know the shared trait between a magician with a cold and your mother last night?

16:07 – Both do extraordinary things and shout “Baji! Baji”! (‘magic! magic!’ But pronounced with a cold)

16:10 – [Chifuyu] He’s getting ratio-ed and he’s yelling ‘baji-baji’?

16:13 – Big flop!

16:15 – Baji! Uh… Come back?

16:17 – Don’t wanna

16:18 – Fuck, he’s good at this!

X

16:19 – [Chifuyu crying]

16:20 – Ah! You speak Crybaby too!?

16:21 – I’m not a crybaby, I just got my face bashed in

16:23 – Come on, please, to make me happy…

16:25 – Okay, alright…

16:26 – [(cry)baby language]

16:28 – What?!! I’ve never heard such shocking language!

16:30 – Is that so? And if I told you I had the key to who is hiding behind Valhalla gang?

16:32 – What key, that key?!! (*alternatively: A key? What key?)

16:33 – Ah, you knew it too?

16:34 – Well no, I’m asking you

16:36 – But you just said it

16:37 – Uh?

16:38 – Uh?

16:39 – Ohhhhhhhh!… No, I don’t get it

16:40 – Well, Key-that-key (*key-what-key) in one word it’s…

16:42 – A syntaxical mistake…

16:43 – That’s not– ‘Tetta’

16:44 – You, /

16:45 – Tetta Kisaki!

16:47 – Well, ‘Gesundheit’! What do you want me to say?!!!

X

16:48 – Kisaki is the one leading Walhalla

16:50 – wuHAT. Hell and damnation! I’m staggered!

16:52 – Draken – you are BALD?!!!????!

16:54 – [Draken] It’s him, I don’t have the shadow of a doubt

16:55 – Nor the shadow of a single hair!

X

16:56 – I have no idea on how to stop Tetta Kisaki

16:58 – With handcuffs? – Shut the fuck up

16:59 – By reading him his right…

17:01 – Why did I trust you… Give me a real idea!

17:03 – Okay, mark carefully everything I’m going to tell you

17:04 – On Halloween there’s going to be a real blood bath, a brawl between Walhalla and Toman. It’s the moment where Mikey is going to start to lose it. Because Baji is going to die and Mikey will take out his frustration on Kazutora until he dies. It’s easy: I need to prevent Baji’s death and avoid that Mikey flips out. What do you think?

17:18 – Two out of ten

17:19 – Uh?

17:20 – No, not ‘one’, two out of ten

17:21 – What are you talking about?

17:22 – Well you told me to mark everything you were telling me

17:23 – / Not like that, mark with a pen!

17:26 – Ah, well I can mark your grade on a sheet if you want but I don’t see where it leads us to

17:29 – Rrrrrrahhhhh

17:30 – Send me back!

17:31 – Uh… /

17:32 – Send me back in time!

X

17:33 – Listen, Kazutora, we have to start up anew with a healthy beginning

17:36 – You know, we were all tight-knight back then,

17:38 – and nobody understood why you’re that angry with Mikey

17:40 – That’s not difficult, I killed his brother

17:41 – You see, that’s precisely that nobody understands

17:43 – I killed this dude’s brother, I’m not going to FORGIVE him

17:46 – Do you listen to yourself when you talk? Do-Do you even understand yourself?

17:49 – I kill this dude’s brother and he’s there chill and he has the audacity to look at me in the eyes

17:52 – Mister, is there a medical history of strokes in your family?

17:54 – Time will probably do what it does. But if I kill his mom by then he’s going to hear me!

17:58 – Fuck it, you’re only taking shit!

17:59 – I got it, between us there won’t be any truce!

X

18:01 – Enough with the yakking, fuckers,

18:03 – This clash will be a logic test.

18:05 – Is that okay with you, Kazutora?

18:08 – WHY AM I HITTING YOU??? EXPLAIN!! I HATE YOU!!!

18:11 – Well, then we’ll do that by fighting

18:13 – oh fuck yeah.

18:14 – Hey, Mikey!

18:15 – Remind me: how do you start a clash, already?

18:18 – [inhale] FUCK ‘EM UP!!!!

18:19 – YEAH!!!!

X

18:22 – I warned you, Mikey!

18:23 – You can flee all you want

18:24 – – Kazutora-gotya!

18:25 – You wield the language great, but we’re going to see this

18:27 – BEWARE, HERE IT GOES,

18:28 – MIKEY-KICK!

X

18:30 – Gabriel Chantouin, you are a physic professor at Sorbonne, what do you think about what we just saw?

18:36 – It’s shit

18:38 – [inhale]… Thank you, Gabriel Chantouin–

X

18:40 – Guys! Mikey is exhausted

18:41 – Time to beat the fuck out of him at 60 versus 1 with blunt objects while he has no way of retaliating!

18:47 – Like real men?!!

18:48 – Like real men!!!

18:49 – YEAH!!!

18:50 – No, MIKEYYYYYYY!!!

18:51 – Hold, stop!

18:52 – Wait, zoom?

18:53 – Oh wow

18:54 – WoaOOOAaooAAw

X

18:56 – Gabriel Chantouin, you are still a physic professor at Sorbonne

18:59 – What do you think about the prominence of the posterior of the young man we just saw?

19:03 – Like we said back in my days:

19:04 – it’s an ass for champions.

19:06 – …

19:07 – Thank you, Gabriel Chantouin–

X

19:09 – Baji, you shouldn’t do that alone!

19:11 – What are you talking about?

19:12 – Stop playing innocent,

19:13 – we’ll both say what we think at the same time!

19:15 – One, two, three!

19:17 – Baji: go out with Madison Beer

Chifuyu: Stop Tetta Kisaki!

19:18 – Madison Beer? But, what about Tetta Kisaki?

19:20 – Uh… Tetta Kisaki, yeah, yeah he’s my goal

19:22 – Well, no, not to go out with him, but stop him, I…

19:25 – Fuck.

19:26 – You have a plan of action?

19:27 – Yeah, first step is to type to survive

X

19:29 – AAaaaAAOUCH

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, BAJI!

19:31 – WHY DID YOU STAB MY RIB, YOU ASS?

19:33 – THIS IS ALL MIKEY’S FAULT!

19:34 – AND HIS BROTHER!

19:35 – AND THIS ICE CREAM MAN AT THIS SQUARE TWO YEARS AGO

19:37 – WHO GAVE ME A PISTACHIO SUPPLEMENT

19:39 – WHEN I DIDN’T ASK FOR IT!!!

X

19:40 – Hi.

19:41 – It’s the voice-over.

19:42 – I wasn’t there in the previous parody video

19:43 – It feels weird, doesn’t it?

19:44 – Yeah…

19:45 – And now, a brief sum up of episode 21:

19:47 – [Mikey machine-guns Kazutora]

19:48 – Wait, he’s going to kill him at this point

19:49 – [Mikey machine-guns Kazutora]

19:50 – Maybe we should separate them?

19:51 – [Mikey machine-guns Kazutora]

19:52 – So young and so dead!

19:53 – [Mikey machine-guns Kazutora]

19:54 – Why do none of these assholes lift a finger?!!

19:55 – [Mikey machine-guns Kazutora]

19:56 – Wait, I just got stabbed and nobody gives a shit?

19:58 – My natural need for attention is not met!

20:01 – GUYS!

20:02 – (ah, I stop moving)

20:03 – The samurai tried to commit seppuku

20:05 – But he failed,

20:07 – he didn’t have the guts to do it!

20:08 – Unlike me!

20:11 – (Woaw, awk–ward) (*the guy’s awkward)

X

20:13 – Repeat after me Kazutora, this is all…

20:16 – Baji’s fault?

20:17 – No! That’s not the right answer, Kazutora! Bad!

20:20 – It’s, it’s…

20:21 – The ice cream man’s fault!

20:22 – No, Kazutora! Very badly answered, bad boy! (*naughty boy=

20:24 – (whines)

20:25 – /

20:27 – /

20:28 – /

20:29 – /

20:30 – (whines)

20:31 – Go ahead and rot in jail, Crazytora

20:32 – Wuuhat?

X

20:34 – Welcome to your house, Master Takemichi!

20:36 – The timeline changed: I’m a high-ranking yakuza

20:38 – Which means…

20:40 – Which means!

20:41 – Hinata Tachibana is dead.

20:42 – I don’t give a single fuck! I’m rich!

20:44 – I can pay an escort twice as hot!

20:46 – I can finally live as I want to!

X

20:47 – You’re going to die here and now

20:49 – Who’s this guy!?

20:50 – Takemichi, times changed

20:52 – Nowadays I am at the top of a financial empire

20:54 – I have an army ready to kneel for me

20:56 – And contrary to the comedian voicing me,

20:58 – – I still have hair

20:59 – Eh!

21:02 – [moan]

21:03 – [through gritted teeth] Tetta… How do you do to--

21:05 – Have eyebrows this greatly trimmed?

21:06 – It’s two hours every week at the esthetician’s on Mondays at 2:30 pm,

21:10 – Sabrina truly has nimble fingers

21:11 – I was mainly wondering how you can sleep at night, you filthy monster!

21:14 – It’s easy really, 2 hours of ASMR nature sounds and chamomile tea

21:18 – He has such perfect answers I’d almost forgive him for the bullet he’s going to shoot in my head in a few seconds

21:21 – Oh, no, come on! You spoiled me!

21:24 – I myself wasn’t aware I was going to do it,

21:26 – I was enjoying hesitating, fUckk

21:29 – Well, when it’s time to go…

21:30 – [gunshot]

21:31 – chiFUYUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

21:34 – Stop!

YUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

21:36 – I didn’t intend to shot, really

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

21:38 – It– It’s getting on my nerves!

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

21:40 – SHUT THE FUCK UP

21:42 – uuU? [Mikey mouse wannabe]

21:44 – Well, Big Bad Guy: introduction, done

21:45 – I didn’t tell you the plan but basically it’s world domination, there

21:48 – And, well, how do I conclude this,

21:50 – It’s always hard, so I…

21:52 – I don’t know,

21:53 – Should I shoot you in the head?

21:54 – Be a very big pathetic loser if you’re okay with it

21:56 – [pants]

21:57 – Okay, you’re okay with it, okay then that’s what we do, I love when business goes nicely like this when,

22:01 – when the agreement is, is mutual

22:03 – Farewell, Takemichi

22:04 – [gunshot]

22:06 – (“Crybaby” starts playing)

[TOKYO CLIFFHANGER クリフハンガ一ズ]

[crybabylulu]

Pt 17 this is correct and no I will not take criticism

*Wayne Gala time*

Jason: I hate this shit

Tim: me too

Jason: I change my mind I love this shit

Tim: wtf?

Jason: I don’t wanna share the same opinions or feelings as you

Tim: fuck you

Jason: *sees Vicky Vale talking to Lucy*

Vicky: so Lucy you stole a car to go see the Barbie movie?

Lucy: well actually

Bruce: *comes tf outta no where and grabs Lucy’s shoulders* no comment Vicky

Vicky: are you sure you don’t want to address your children stealing a car? And Bruce may I even ask what were you thinking by taking in Harley Quinn’s daughter? I mea-

Talia: do you not understand what no comment means? *holding a blade in her purse*

Lucy: you wanna talk about my son?

Bruce & Talia: *sighs knowing Vicky is gonna run with the story of Lucy having an actual child when she’s just talking about her cat*

Vicky: son? Whose the father?

Lucy: oh d-

Talia: *covers Lucy’s mouth* enough out of you young lady. Run along *pushes Lucy towards Cass*

*bonus*

*some of the children watching the news*

Vicky: good morning everyone! My name is Vicky Vale and I’ve got exciting news! Lucy Quinn has welcomed a lovely baby boy! I’m not sure who the father is but let’s send her lots of love

Lucy: Mr. Chuckles they’re talking about you baby! *holding her cat up to the tv*

Barbara: this is why I tell you all to tell me when you say stupid shit so I can start scrubbing shit off the internet before it goes big! *stressed asf*

Damian: HEY! IM THE FATHER! HES MY CAT AS WELL!

Barbara: SHE DOESNT THINK HES A CAT SHE THINKS HES A HUMAN CHILD

Cass: thirsty bitch

Barbara: CASSANDRA WATCH YOUR MOUTH!

Steph: damn that’s fucking crazy

Barbara: STEPHANIE!

Steph: I’m grown!

Barbara: don’t start with me

Steph: I’m so sorry

*extra bonus*

Bruce: *at work getting tons and tons of congratulations and gift baskets to give to Lucy*

[thenixkat]

so Wonder Woman got all that flack about killing Maxwell Lord but he told and possibly brainwashed her to kill him as part of his 'make the public turn against superheroes' ploy

also Wonder Woman isn't one of those heroes with a no killing rule. ANd honestly, she shouldn't feel anything back about killing Max given he brainwashed fucking SUperman through the power of bullshit to kill people that's a decent reason to off a bitch

and this bullshit

why is Batman's spy satellite able to access half this shit?

Superman's awfully upset that she killed Max to stop Superman from murdering her and Batman like?

yeah that was a life but like yer priorities sir Brother Eye starting a fuck ton of problems to get the superheroes attention off of it while it back up plan shit

so Max's plans involved murdering Everyone at Checkmate. All of them in the backup plan. They were right to have a bad feeling about him

its almost like having a murder happy boss is a big red flag

yeah Sasha you earned that. Play mind games with lives on the line, don't be surprised if a bitch you tried to set up for shit chokes you the fuck out

Guy continues to be a gross sexist pig and i fail to see why people like him

Fire told Guy and Booster to get the fuck out of her office if they dont have info she doesnt know

Fire, the ex-spy was on the case herself. Again why wasn't Ted allowed to go to any of his friends with investigative experience for help other than the Countdown writer wanted him to die

Bea/Fire looking at the financial reports for Kord Inc of Ted getting robbed to hell and back

Brother Eye checks in on Batman to say its sentient now and does what it wants and also it changed its name to Brother Eye

damn Batman maybe you shouldnt have programmed an ai while in full paranoia mode. Its almost like that reflects in the being you created.

like fucker made a thing capable of some amount of thought, told it to watch fuckers b/c they're dangerous and may do shit that harms humanity, told it all their weaknesses, and then didn't keep a close enough eye on it to keep it from deciding that there was a flaw in the programming you gave it and find someone to help fix that flaw

the paranoid ass ai that Batman made decided that Batman can't be trusted to not try and fuck over humanity or cross the line. WHich fair, Batman made a fucking spy satellite capable of accessing every device on the planet apparently, filled it with info that could be used to hurt people, gave it an ai to operate on its own with minimal supervision, and put a death laser in it. Clearly that man is dangerous

[dissvicious]

Redbomb triplets trivias

Next friday if I manage my time correctly, the nine first pages of Daddy's Treasure, my webcomic about Buggy's offsprings, will be published on this blog. The panels are almost done, they juste need some shading & lettering.

To keep you waiting, have this trivia post about the Redbomb triplets

Blaze

As we stated many times before, he's stupid. Dumby dumbass, 0 braincell. Can't write his own name correctly. But ! He actually beat his siblings when it comes to emotional intelligence. Seing someone they love crying, Rory would sigh in annoyance, Skye would punch their shoulder playfully before trying to change the subject to something more lightly, but if you cry in front of Blaze you'll soon have a little redhair gremlin glued in your arms hugging you warmly (good luck getting rid of it)

Basically a golden retriver with extra ADHD. If he decides that he likes someone he will not go away from them.

Even if this person actually want him to go away, tho.

He's a biiiiiiig mama's boy, he's always glued in his mother arms.

Sometimes he put his hair in ponytail and try to make a resting bitch face to imitate Rory, which makes laugh everyone (except Rory)

Skye

Due to Reddie being a former strawhat, the crew is like extended family to the triplets.

Zoro and Skye get along well, Zoro teaching her a thing or two with swords.

In fact, it's possible, really possible, that Skye had a HUGE childhood crush on him - you know, those innocents crushes kids can have on cool teens around them sometimes.

Zoro was totally oblivious of it, of course.

"Hey look she offered me another drawing" (Nami tries to not giggle seeing her crewmate holding a kid drawing picturing Skye and Zoro in a flower field with swords) "Guess I'm the coolest babysitter huh ?" (It's really hard for Nami to not burst into laugh right now)

During a family dinner, after being babysitted by the strawhats, Skye didn't stop talking about Zoro - how fun he was, how skilled he was with swords etc etc.

Reddie playfully asked her "Hey, you're in love or what ?" and she made this exact face :

"He's gay, and he's an idiot. Don't waste your time." Rory said, not looking up from his dishes, making everyone around the table pretty much incomfortable for a moment.

Reddie had to explain the concept of childhood crush to Buggy because he was already ready to storm the Straw Hats for breaking his little tinkerbell's heart.

Later when this silly crush faded away, she understood she just admired swordmen and wanted to gain skills with blades

Probably understood that Zoro was effectively gay, too.

She started being glued to Mihawk whenever Buggy took her at work - pretty much to Mihawk displeasure, tho.

Rory

So we know that Rory get along well with Crocodile and with Shanks

The fact that it pisses off his father a TON make it even more enjoyable to him.

He actually seems to take great pleasure in sympathizing with people his father despite the most.

His polite tone and the way he talks brutal truth 24/24 with placid glances tends to make adults laugh a lot when he's around.

Rory has a very strict mental hierarchy when it comes to his family / the people he lives with, from the person he respects the most to the person he respects the less it would be : Himself, Reddie, Skye, Alvida, Buggy, the whole crew, Richie, Blaze.

But don't get it wrong, he loves his brother !

... in his very weird kind of way, though

While one of Rory's favorite hobbies is to fight with his brother and make him feel like an idiot, he would never let anyone else doing so.

Rory (rolling eyes) : Blaze you could become the richiest boy on earth if you rented the space between your ears.

Some crewmember : Aha you got it kid, your brother really is an idiot !

Rory (jumping on his feet, a hand on a smokebomb, ready to fight) : WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL MY BROTHER, SHITHEAD ?!