#You see what I mean?
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In the total isolation experiments, baby Treebark solos would be left alone for three, six, 12, or 24 months of "total yaoi deprivation". The experiments produced fans that were severely psychologically disturbed. Harlow wrote: "No fan has died during isolation. When initially removed from total yaoi isolation, however, they usually go into a state of emotional shock, characterized by ... autistic self-clutching and rocking. One of six fans isolated for 3 months refused to reblog posts after learning Martyn was in Fantasy SMP and deactivated 5 days later. (...)"
Total yaoi isolation in MCYT fans., H.F. Harlow
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genuinely sometimes I think I'd be happier if I just left fandom altogether - maybe not the self shipping side that makes me happy but like. as much as spite used to fuel me into making even more poe stuff I have to admit that my experiences with that fandom have really just. burned me (out). I don't really feel the point in making stuff creatively even tho I enjoy making things and giffing is good regulation for me, but it's maybe not worth constantly having to hear negative things about my special interest, pushing my comfort boundaries in sharing poe, and constantly hearing about how a character I adore and relate to a lot and has gotten me through so much in the last 9 years — was actually just better when the fandom could slap whatever personality they wanted onto him.
#nym speaks#just. trying to be a fandom blog is exhausting#and I'm not having fun with it yanno?#and my experiences with the oi and sw fandom have uh. been not so fabulous#and it's - idk. it's tiring trying to enjoy my favorite things that no one ever makes things for because I have to go digging for posts#and in doing that I see the negativity. and bad takes about my husband.#but if I make my own....I also see the negativity and the bad takes about my husband#you see what I mean?#there's no win win
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maybe it's just me but the version of helluva boss we're getting episodes of really feels like a stolitz fanfic based off the pilot
#with stolas' personality flip#“they're trying to convince people global warming exists”#“doesn't it?”#you see what i mean?#helluva boss
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okay I love soukoku as a romantic relationship when the dynamic is right and both of them have good characterization and it’s cute and all but like,,,
✨qpr skk✨
you see it? I see it
#you get it#you see what i mean?#the vibes are immaculate#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bsd manga#bsd chuuya#chuuya nakahara#dazai osamu#bungou stray dogs dazai#bsd skk#soukoku#queer platonic relationship#qpr
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I'm still not okay with kids born in 2000 being not only able to drink in the USA, but also applying to graduate schools.
But it just hit me like a hammer to the gut that in 2 years, 1 month, kids born in 2010 will start being able to drive in the USA.
#phoenix sounds#The passage of time is really fucking me over right now#Time kind of. Stopped passing right definitely in 2016#And the (ongoing) pandemic has accelerated this significantly#Or maybe it's slowed down? I have no idea#Time is borked severely is the point#1990 was 10 years ago; May of this year was yesterday and also 7 years ago#You see what I mean?
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Lol, my friend and I recently watched Falling for Christmas. We couldn't help but notice how the father and the love interest literally look the same...
They have pretty much the same hair. We could not tell which was which at the end of the film.
#you see what i mean?#wtf#stillagoodmovie#falling for christmas#lindsay lohan#chord overstreet#jackwagner#Christmas
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Ngl I'm curious what vision do you think I'd have?
honestly at first glance i confidently said ‘pyro’ because of your yanfei pfp
#📬 lume answers#💛 lumes mutuals#🤍; scarlet!#and!!!#scarlet is a type of red#you see what i mean?#okay now i’m certain it’s pyro#now that i brought that up
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Tenya Iida and Kunikida Doppo
You see what I see?
#bungo stray dogs#my hero acedamia#boku no hero acedamia#tenya iida#bsd kunikida#you see what i mean?#bsd#mha
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looking over the relationship between natural killer cells and macrophages and going ah yes, like in Hannibal
#iykyk#medicine#hannibal#idk if this is a coherent joke to anyone but me#but those two cell types are My Guys now#studying#(to explain the joke:#Macrophages eat things#Macrophages stimulate NK cells to become fully activated#NK cells then increase the killing capacity of the Macrophages)#You see what i mean?#you see what i mean#i am going insane#biology student rapidly losing brain cells to fandom#seriously i was trying to study and this thought occured#send help
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I'm not a snob about books vs. television, everyone likes different stuff and that's fine. But the fact that I have 1300 books and no television does often make it hard to engage in casual conversation and thereby build friendships. Just saying.
#did i watch the bachelor last night?#no i was reading about the history of concrete#you see what i mean?
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The death of Adobe Flash was a tragic thing indeed. It hasn't even been that long and you can already see the effect it's had on the youth.
#those flash games were my childhood#papas games#shop empire#all of those#OH AND BLOONS TOWER DEFENSE#you see what i mean?#kids these days just eat takis go on tik tok watch cocomelon and then cry because their mother wouldn't give them the credit card for robux#. . . i miss them#a lot#narky thinks
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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Post # 31 as to why I love Rogue's Fury
Don't mess with the Rogue
#xmenedit#tw flashing#rogue#x men 97#x-men#anna marie lebeau#xmen 97#xmen#x-men 97#flashing gif#flash warning#my gifs#reblog#booky reacts#you see what I mean?
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I still haven’t watched the last two episodes of Evilive 😬
The thing is. One the one hand, I desperately want to see the completion of Dongsoo’s corruption arc.
But on the other hand, I really don’t want to see Doyoung die. I just wanted them to live or die together (and preferably live ����).
And I just think that, Doyoung started out in that big house all alone except for the comatose former boss in that one room. So like, maybe Dongsoo should end up in that big house all alone except for the comatose former boss in that one room, who’s haunting him. I’m just saying. I love a parallel and an opening ending.
#evilive#dongsoo x doyoung#doyoung x dongsoo#leave the door open a tiny crack#and I will bust it open with my happy headcanons#season 2 of comatose doyoung haunting the narrative when?#until he wakes up and bloodies his boyfriend up before kissing him on the mouth#you see what I mean?#I don’t really know what happens in the final two eps#but I have a sense from gifsets#why do bad beautiful men covered in blood always have to have bad things happen to them?#spoilers#?#months after the fact
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I've come to realize that whenever I watch a show or play a game, my favorite characters tend to be the really grumpy characters with a heart of gold, or the really chaotic characters with absolutely no sense of morals. There's no in-between. It's very consistent.
#for instance I love inosuke from demon slayer#but I also love knuckles and shadow from sonic#you see what I mean?#I don't know why I made this post#I'm bored#bleh#ramblings
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the end of the naltrexone saga
it's been about 2 weeks since i discontinued 50 mg of naltrexone and FINALLY my anxiety is under control. i finally feel HUMAN AGAIN!!!
but seriously that whole experience was lowkey traumatizing in the way that i don't want to try any other medication for anything pysch related ever again. it was a truly horrific experience and i cannot afford to go through that side effect hell again.
my psychiatrist wanted me to try antabuse or topamax but when i meet with him tomorrow it's gonna be a firm NO. i'm done with these meds. the current mix of psych meds i'm on is perfect 👌 i'm done messing with it.
#throwback to when i was put on buspar for anxiety and it made my anxiety 10000x worse#you see what i mean?#it's a stupid game#and i already have shit that works#i'll be fine#psychiatry#personal#mental health#sobriety#recovery#soberlife#update
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