#Yeah I've been thinking about heaven a lot these past few years

[butt3rnugg3t]

Tell Me A Tale

Authors Note: Plz be nice!! First thing I've written and posted in like 4 years, I'm rusty! I fear there's a lot of dialogue. I'm thinking of making this with multiple parts but for now this is it.

OH! And this isn't set in Hawkins. So, this is an AU where Eddie is just a hot tatted dude. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. 👍

Word Count 702 (Unedited)

The bell dings, echoing through the small shop on the corner of 5th and Main. Floor to ceiling bookshelves wrap themselves around the store, dust settled in on a few shelves. The door said open, but the vacant counter to the right of the door was unoccupied. Maybe Eddie had read the sign wrong, but he was about 90 percent sure the sign said open.

“Hello?” His voice seemed to echo around the space for a moment before a loud clattering sounded from the back room. 

“Be with you in a moment!” drifted back to him, followed by another series of clashes and finally a few curses. That caused Eddie to smile softly to himself. Another few minutes passed by before he finally saw a pair of legs appear out of the back room, just legs because the rest of her was hidden behind a large stack of books, stacked haphazardly in her arms. “Sorry about making you wait, it's technically my first day working the store by myself and as you can probably tell I've got my work cut out for me."

“I can see, I thought this store had been here for the past 20 or so years though." Thats what Steve had told him when he brought up needing a new copy of 'The Hobbit'.

Eddie grimaced as the store owner tripped on a loose bit of the carpet and almost dropped everything before quickly correcting herself. Taking a deep breath she finally deposited them at the counter before turning to take Eddie in. And Eddie in turn was finally getting all of her as well. She was just as frumpled as he thought she would be, it made him smile.

Denim overalls layered on top of a plain black t-shirt, bright red converse on each foot. Mismatched socks along with her hair looking like it was about to fall out of the messy braid it was forced into. Skin slightly damp from the sticky summer heat that had taken over the city during this hot July afternoon. She looked adorably...tired. Like she had been running on zero sleep and 3 cups of coffee. He felt bad for just realizing it, even though he had just stepped into her store for the first time.

"Yeah, once again, sorry about the mess," She stepped around the counter truly taking the mantel of 'bookseller'. "Um yeah, I just took over from my grandmother." The pause between her words seemed forced, necessary for her to calm down. He felt a stone fall into his stomach, waiting for the next words to fall from her lips. "she's not doing too great recently but," she paused once again, regaining her composure. "Sorry, I'm sure you didn't come in to hear about my life, how can I help you?"

To her credit, Eddie was sure he'd be a blubbering mess if he had to go on and act like everything was fine if (heaven forbid) anything were to happen to Wayne. He certainly wasn't going to hold her small word vomit against her. He also wouldn't mind hearing all about her life if he were to give him the chance.

"All good, I'm actually looking for a copy of 'The Hobbit'," He stepped over to stand across from her, the counter between them. "My last copy is covered in strawberry ice cream" (read: Dustin made a mess)

"Ah, unfortunately were out of our copies. But if you're willing to wait I can order one for you on my next shipment?" Eddie was convinced this girl could talk him into anything. Even if he was in a hurry to own the book again. (He wasn't)

"Yeah, It's absolutely no rush. What do you need for that?" He watched her pull out a receipt pad, jotting down the book title and price in swirly handwritten letters.

"Just a name and good number to contact you at? For when the book comes in," She was quick with the second sentence. But regardless, Eddie was completely content leaving his personal information in her capable hands. And within minutes the book was paid for, and he was set.

All he had to do now was wait for her call.

[deadwooddross]

Poppin in for the first time in a few months— I’ve been following your art on and off for like two years now, and I just want to say that your art style is still one of my favorite art styles. It’s unique, I love you draw noses/mouths/eyes (gods i love the way you draw mouths and teeth and facial expressions in general, am trying to learn from how you do this because it’s SO GOOD) in a really detailed way while still maintaining stylization, and the grittiness of a lot of your art really inspires me! 

 Also, your armada of trans characters (happy early pride, btw!) are wonderful. Umami in particular is my beloved (to be loved is to be changed indeed, she’s wonderful, and I think about that particular post all the time). Gender stuff’s been funky for me over the past few years, and your peeps have been something of a comfort for me as I figure myself out. Especially because a lot of your characters don’t adhere to strict gender norms— they just exist in their gender, whether that’s dude or woman or nb or something else, and it’s been helping me figure out that I can just exist wherever I’m at, too. I’m not sure if that makes sense, but yeah, it’s appreciated.

I also just really appreciate the diversity in your character designs in general, especially as someone who struggles with variation in character design. I might be rambling here, but even amongst all your fantasy stuff (I’m not quite sure what warhammer is, but you make it look epic), your people just look like they’d be regular people. Like no shade on other artists!, but at the same time, the same anime-esque small nose round/oval face different hair different eyes athletic build for everyone’s favorite characters gets samey after awhile, and i don’t know a lot of people who look like that in real life, y’know? While like your characters like Lyell and human Umami (off the top of my head) and your less obviously fantastical designs in general look like people I could run into while, like, I dunno, grocery shopping or something. They’re unique, but they’re also grounded. It’s definitely something I want to bring to my own art— it makes me feel like I could connect to the character designs more because of it. 

I hope this all made sense, but basically your art is really really cool, and you’re character designs are top notch! wishing you a wonderful Pride and a great rest of your week

I've just been looking at this ask every now and then like :] wahhh, thanks!! it's always nice to get an idea of what it is people See in my art these days, since it just kinda looks 'normal' to me haha. Never really think of it as being all that stylized until I realize oh wait, most people are out here drawing much more reasonably sized mouths, oops, and i love regular people! Truly some of the best inspiration for interesting character designs to me are usually out buying corn nuts and a beer at the gas station and whathaveyou...regular people are great, i recommend jotting down any interesting folks you see as fast as you can, like a monk frantically scribbling down a vision from heaven

[godlike-enigma]

°•*⁀➷ INTRODUCING MYSELF ! ˘͈ᵕ˘͈

bani ☆ she/her ☆ entp 5w4 ☆ minor (𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗶𝗰𝘁𝗹𝘆 18+ 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝗴𝘀 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝗰𝗸 𝗺𝗲) // side blog: @ilubeau

HI GUYS !! i post daydreaming-related stuff here but it's also kind of a mix of everything, i'll also post anime related stuff, i'll never really stick to just one thing but what i CAN tell you i'll be sticking to is my centrecosm mostly (my main paracosm, i'm staying loyal to the one i've been building for the past 4 years) it's also a blanket paracosm so there's loads of subcosms inside it but at the end of the day it's linear and takes place chronologically.

i have a few paracosms here and there so that's why i call myself a paracosmist but really and all they'll never compare to my main one. ಠ_ಠ

❤︎ this is a safe place for all madders (ง'̀-'́)ง, i really wanna make friends that are passionate with opening up about their little daydreaming worlds, i'll listen to you yap about it all day long.

PLEASE DO SEND QUESTIONS ABOUT MY PARACOSM(S) OR ABOUT YOURS !! i'll always reply ^-^

MY CENTRECOSM ✧

i have 60 paras (characters). yes. you heard that right. SIXTY. i have a whole pinterest board on it and i update it regularly -

https://pin.it/4Yvd42Asm

also yeah i'm a microcelebrity on pinterest idk if you've seen me around but yeah wtvr 😭😭 ALRIGHT LEMME GIVE YOU GUYS A LIL SYNOPSIS ! (i've never done one it's kinda scary)

my paracosm consists of 50 Gods, 4 archdemons, 4 archangels and God themself (God doesn't have a gender) and 5 monotheistic Gods, my paracosm has its own lore of different mythologies. greek, norse, and egyptian mythology. fiction has no limits, so i can bend it to fit my desires, i LOOOOOVE mythologies of all kinds, so i made my own lore using the names you see on the pinterest board. all of the Gods have the same power and no ones more powerful than each other except for God and Satan. the Gods are the most beautiful, ethereal, alluring individuals in heaven. Satan made it so that whenever someone who is not a God sees a God's appearance, they physically feel like they can't say anything. this is to prevent any romantic relationships. so whenever, for example, a human who is granted permission sees them, obviously, their initial reaction would be shock and the need to compliment them. right when they're about to do that, they start to feel choked up like they can't get the words out. it'll go on like that until they give up. the gods have noticed that a lot of the time when they show their selves to other people and they start reacting like that.. they start thinking its because they're ugly or something. LMFAOO, they'll be like "damn i'm THAT ugly???" and its so ironic bc they're actually trying to tell them they're more than beautiful, but they CAN'T because of Satan. he has a lot of unreasonable rules, and the Gods just put up with it because they appointed him as the leader whilst God is gone, so they kind of did to themselves... to put it in a nutshell, the Gods have never been complimented. like. ever. so 😭 its only factual that they'd feel like they're the ugliest individual alive. Satan is currently acting as the overseer of the Gods whilst God is away, so he gets to do whatever he wants to. the Gods are the main characters, the archdemons and archangels are side characters, Satan is the antagonist, and God is... mysterious. they don't pop up. ever. so the Gods just assume they don't like them. i can go on and on about this, but i feel like i'm yapping too much ... this isn't even 0000.5% of the story. sorry, guys, this is a really bad summary, but trust me, you'll find out more about it if you follow through with my posts 🙏🏽

tags i'll use (＞﹏＜) :

#𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗺𝗮𝗱𝗱 -> posts that are not daydreaming-related

#𝗯𝗮𝗻𝗶'𝘀 𝘆𝗮𝗽 𝘀𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 -> original posts

#𝗺𝗮𝗱𝗱 𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘁 -> vents about madd

#𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗯𝘆𝗯𝗮𝗻𝗶 -> art i make about my paracosm or anime and stuff

[blackhakumen]

Mini Fanfic #1171: The Diary of Beartrap (Epithet Erased)

Dear Diary,

It's been a while, hasn't it?~ I'm sorry it took too long for me to write to you. Quite a lot has happened to me as of late: Some hectic, some exciting, a few rough patches and there, but I promise you there's a lot good after that. In fact, my life has gotten a lot better since it ever been, but I'm getting way ahead of myself already, so let's get started , shall we?

To get the bad and obvious out of the way, my relationship with my family hasn't improved at all unfortunately. Lorelai's still as lazy and self-centered ever while always constantly butting heads with me every chabce she gets, dad-no, Martin, is too investing in his own little world to even care about anything anymore, and I always had to spend the last few years of my life, watching over the toy store and keep it up float while cleaning up THEIR messes on a daily basis! And yeah, I HATE every second of it and EVERYDAY!!

.....But it couldn't be helped. The day mother left has been really rough for all of us since then, so it's not too hard to understand why our relationship became so....distant, hollow, dysfunctional and so.....messy. I should've realized sooner that things would turn out the way it did and be more prepared, but even then, I doubt it would've been any less stressful and draining than it was now and after everything Lorei put me and my friends through in her fantasy world of hers that night, I decided enough was enough and leave everything behind me: the toy store, the people I used to call my family, and.....my previous life up to this point..........

And I'm happy I made that choice, because like I said, my life really turned around for a whole lot better since then. I'm doing a lot better in school, I get to spend more time with my friends stressed-free, I even did a few other things I've never thought i would ever get to do in whole life: like being a part of school plays, attend football amd basketball games, and making these suuuuuper yummy cinnamon apple raisins waffle in cute cub head shapes~

To tell you truth, I don't think any of this would be even remotely be possible if it weren't for the two people who are working their butts off into looking after me as of late: Crusher, the biggest teddy bear of a sweetheart I have ever met (Which is pretty ironic considering he actually went as a teddy bear for Halloween last year. So freaking adorable!~ i should really remember to him again when he and the others come back), and my one and only boss: Giovanni Potage.

I honestly don't think I have the proper words to express how much he means to me or even how thankful I truly am for everything heaven done for me so far. He taught me how to be more confident in myself and become more assertive, he goes out of his way and beyond to try to help me with stuff in general, and he even went out of his way to take me our of my miserable home life and does his very best to look after me to this very. He sees a lot more value and importance in me than I even realized I have any myself. He did all of this is.....because he cares about me. Because he loves me. And......I love him too. So much that.....I wanna do whatever I can to help him out: with our new villain group, any of his newer evil schemes, and everything else in general. It's the least I can do for everything he have done for me thus far.

To this day, I still don't think I have a clue as to what the future will have in store for me or what to expect going forward, but I won't let it scare me off that easily. I won't let my past life take a hold of me any longer. I am going to live rest of my life to the fullest by my own accord and with the people I truly love and cherish. And if anyone has a problem with that, they can go screw themselves right off to the blazing sun, cause I'm not stopping one bit!

Giovanni: (In the Other Room) Ohh Beeartraaaaap!~ Dinner's finally ready!~

Crusher: And we finally return with SNACKS!

Spike: Annnnd a good amount of decent quality movies we can all watch!~ None of which were chosen by Ben thank God!

Ben: Dude, seriously!?

Car Crash: Hey, we're not the ones who brought tickets to that knock off Ice Age movie that one time, didn't we?

Ben: ('Let's Out a Frustrated Scream')

Molly: (Giggles Softly) Coming! (Finishes Up Writing on her Diary)

Okay, as much as I would love to stay and wrote, I gotta go now. We're having lasagna and a whole movie night tonight. They said they'll be a lot a movie to watch through this time around, so fingers crossed for at least a few of them to be decent. But until then, I'll try and write to you more often. It is one of my many New Years Resolutions after all, might as well make the most out of them.

Love,

Molly Blyndeff A.K.A. Beartrap

@aprilbrowines

[jajanvm-imbi]

Hazbin Hotel 4 episode premiere review Part 2

Part 1 | Part 3

I'm gonna preface this by saying that I am enjoying Hazbin in the same way I enjoy Helluva Boss. I've been following the series since the pilot's release, I've gotten more and more excited with every announcement leading up to it's offical release and I've already watched every episode several times.

HOWEVER, just like with Helluva Boss, there are a lot of issues with Hazbin that I feel are very fair criticisms worth talking about.

This isn't going to be another bad-faith rambling about how the show is shit, how everyone who likes it is stupid, and how Viv and her creative team deserved all of the harassment they've gotten for the past couple of years. Like I said I've been enjoying Hazbin and Helluva for what they are a lot, but just because I enjoy both shows doesn't mean I don't think there are many issues with it.

This post is going to be discussing Hazbin's issues ofc, but I'd really like to sit down and write up all of my issues with Helluva one day as well because any issues in Hazbin are almost always 10x worse in Helluva.

So now with that our of the way, here's my critique on Hazbin Hotel as someone who enjoys the show:

Buckle up cause this post is gonna be long

What I believe the main issue for Hazbin Hotel boils down to the same issue for Helluva Boss:

Pacing

The pacing in Hazbin is......not great. Don't get me wrong, its waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better than the pacing in Helluva Boss, by like, a lot. But that doesn't mean its, well, good.

The Over-Reliance on the Pilot's Popularity.

So, there's no actual introduction to any character but Charlie and mayyyyyyyybe Vaggie. But the rest of the cast is just, there, and the audience is supposed to know who they are automatically. And even then, the introduction to the premise is almost non-existent in the first ep.

For those of us who have been following the series for years know who these characters are and what the plot of the series is, but for the causal viewer who's scrolling through Prime and stumbles upon Hazbin, there's no proper introduction to what's happening.

It's almost like its required to watch the pilot before watching the actual series in order to have any idea whats happening. And thats a problem because the pilot isn't an episode its a pilot. For like 99% shows, the audience never sees the pilot. Season 1 episode 1 has to start from square 1, reintroducing who's who and what's going on.

The first ep of Hazbin takes place one week after the pilot. Which means they all acknowledge the pilot happened, its not retconed or anything, but it's still not an episode.

The pilot takes the time to establish Charlie's base personality, her motives, how the rest of hell treats her, and the significance of Alastor's presence at the hotel. Charlie getting bullied by Katie Killjoy at the news station does more for establishing Charlie's character and her motives than anything in all 4 episodes of the official premiere. There isn't really anything to show how hell doesn't take Charlie seriously, either. (The closest thing we get is how Valentino talks about Charlie when she's not there) Yeah Adam bullies her in ep 1 but that heaven not hell. S1 ep 1 "Overture" just expects the audience to already know what's happening.

There is literally no reason why they couldn't have just remade the pilot into an actual episode with a few changes and the new voice cast (obv), and then pick up the next day instead of the next week.

Like is the whole terf war still happening? Cause it isn't acknowledged at all in the premiere. Maybe they could have added Alastor's mysterious 7 year "sabatical" into Vaggie's explanation of Alastor to Angel.

It would have been so easy to just remake the pilot into an episode since the pilot does such a good job of establishing whats going on. A well known example of a show doing just that is the Gravity Falls pilot. The pilot is obviously shorter and the supporting cast is missing, but the plot of the episode is still the same and it establishes the personalities for the 3 main characters. Anyway-

2. The Hotel Isn't Even the Central Focus

They introduced the conflict between Heaven and Hell waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too soon.

This is the exact same thing that happened with Helluva Boss. The pilot displayed a clear premise for the series and then when the series officially airs it turns out the premise isn't even the central focus.

It isnt as offensive in Hazbin because at least Hazbin's central focus is on something still somewhat relevant to the plot which is "helping sinners". In Helluva Boss the central focus is "Owo angsty gay relationship drama", which is completely irrelevant to the initial "imps in hell are hits for hire up on earth and shenanigans ensue" premise.

Why are we being introduced to heaven's schemes to do more than one extermination a year before Charlie even gets a chance to prove there are some sinners interested in being redeemed? It would have been a MILLION times more impactful if Charlie got maybe two or three sinners actually looking to be redeemed to stay at the hotel, who were hopeful that they still had a chance to live a better life, only for all of Charlie's hopes to be crushed by Adam's rejection.

If Charlie had people who believed in her, if she saw how much faith they had in her to help them change their lives around, only for her to come back from her meeting not only saying the angels rejected her but that the next extermination was sooner than anticipated, OUGH would it have hurt.

Instead, the hotel is treated like a background or just a thing to do in the meantime while the characters focus on the Heaven vs. Hell conflict or other stuff.

The show just immediately jumps into the whole Heaven vs. Hell thing without really even focusing on the hotel and what Charlie is trying to do, AKA the title of the fucking show. Why even bother calling the series Hazbin Hotel if you aren't going to even focus on why the hotel exists in the first place????

We as the audience need to spend time at the hotel with the characters in order for us to get attached to Charlie's cause before you dash all our hopes away. Then we can root for Charlie as she overcomes Heaven's hypocrisy with the help of her friends. (which kind of goes back to the over reliance on the pilot)

And the cherry on top would have been that this is the perfect set up for some fun ""filler"" character establishing episodes while Charlie works with the sinners.

There's a reason why most people seem to recognize ep 4 "Masquerade" as the best episode out of the 4 despite also being the most graphic, followed by ep 2 "Radio Killed the Video Star". Both ep 2 and ep 4 are more one off self contained stories you would usually see in a more episodic series, and they're wonderfully entertaining because they're still being treated like introductions. Ep 2 takes the time to properly introduce the Vs and their connections to the main cast, particularly Vox and Alastor's rivalry. Ep 4 introduced Angel's situation with Valentino to the audience, which is a major part of his character, and Angel is part of the main cast so this isn't out of place. The conflicts between the Vs and the main cast aren't resolved by the end of either of these episodes, but thats because they're still only introductions.

The problem with ep 1 and ep 3 is that we're charging ahead with the whole Heaven vs. Hell conflict with characters we still barely know.

The issues with ep 1 mainly tie back into point 1. with how there was no proper reintroduction to anything in the series, and the show immediately crushes Charlie's dreams before we are even properly introduced to them again. Adam being an asshole to Charlie and them moving up the next extermination date has no impact because we as the audience barely knows who these characters even are.

In episode 3, the hotel and the team building stuff is the B plot while Alastor and his meeting with the other Overlords is the A plot??? In the third episode of the series????

I was confused with why ep 3 featured a Velvette and Camilla duet and a Vaggie and Camilla duet because we barely know who Velvette and Camillia are. Why did Camilla get a whole ass power ballad about protecting her daughters from an exorcist if we barely know who Camilla is??? Why was she paired with Vaggie, a character we've already grown attached to for the past 2 episodes??? Vaggie had some nice character moments in ep 3 but it was overshadowed by Camilla's presence because we don't know nearly enough about Camilla for a parallel between her and Vaggie to feel appropriate.

Velvette had some fun banter with Vox in ep 2 but only for like a minute, why is she singing about being better than everyone else?? Vox and Valentino had way more screentime than Velvette so far, so why should we as the audience believe that she's the "backbone of the Vs" and thats why she's feels like she can be disrespectful to Camilla and Zestial? The show doesn't even directly acknowledge that Velvette is the newest and youngest of the overlords, thats information given to us from????Instragram??? Why is Velvette the "backbone of the Vs"?? I'm not saying they should have done a whole backstory episode before this scene, I'm saying there should have at least been a scene foreshadowing Velvette being the mastermind behind the Vs' power or something.

And both the issues with Camilla ad Velvette tie back into how they're talking about starting a fucking WAR with HEAVEN?????????? We barely know anything about the conflict between Heaven and Hell why would a war between the two being a real threat in the mind of the audience??? And what does any of this Overlord drama have to do with Charlie's mission to rehabilitate sinners??? They don't care about the new extermination date because of Charlie's mission they just don't want to fucking die.

Its way too soon to be talking about all this with characters we as the audience barely know. None of this had anything to do with the hotel or Charlie's goals.

So in conclusion to this section, the writers at Hazbin have done the same thing they did with Helluva, which is: They expect the audience to care about the characters and the plot without actually giving us a reason why. Because the pilot was so popular and was the only thing we had of Hazbin for 4 years, they decided that the pilot's popularity was good enough to take the place of actual character establishing work. They felt like since the pilot already generated a large fanbase, they didn't need to do any of the work to get the audience to care about the characters and the plot because they already do. So now the writers are charging ahead with all this fluff and drama, talking about things that are irrelevant to the premise without re-establishing anything because they felt like the pilot are did that for them. Long time fans are gonna eat this all up regardless because we've been waiting for more episodes for YEARS, but Hazbin is going to have a very hard time gaining any new audience on a mainstream platform like Prime Video because the show is incomplete. No casual viewer scrolling through Prime is going to want to click off of Prime, log onto YouTube and watch the 45 minute pilot in order to then understand Hazbin Hotel the series. Causal viewers are going to watch the first episode thinking "Oh I've heard of this lets see what the hype is all about" and then be super confused on whats happening and who all these characters are and quickly loose interest. No one wants to do homework in order to enjoy a show. At least with Helluva Boss the entire show is on YouTube and the official playlist with all the episodes includes the pilot so new viewers don't have to leave the platform. Hazbin already has a second season confirmed right out of the gate, and the fanbase is already large enough to keep the show going (hopefully), but honestly I fear Viv and her team are gonna have a really hard time getting their numbers to grow because of these choices. Lets see how all this plays out.

There's one more thing that I wanted to bring up because it is a glaring issue but people have been talking about it since the pilot so I'll keep it brief.

Character Designs and Color Palette

Yes, Viv's artstyle suffers from "Tumblr Sexyman Syndrome".

Every other character wears a suit and bowtie. Which makes sense for some of them, Charlie and Vox in specifically. Charlie is a princess so she dresses formally and Vox is a business man. (Although why does Vox wear a bowtie and not a regular necktie?)

Alastor, Sir Pentious, and Angel however? Why? I get how a suit and tie could fit into their respective aesthetics, but there are also different outfits from their respective time periods that could have made more sense and would have easily solved this issue.

By having every other character wear the same outfit, we loose the sense that all these characters are from different periods of time and places. Which is a shame because Hell is the PERFECT setting to have all these different time periods collide in a way that makes sense.

No one questions why a 1940s gangster from New York, an English inventor from 1830s London, a radio host from 1930s Louisiana, a housemaid from the 1950s, a Vegas gambler from idk when, etc... are all in the same location because they're all in Hell. They all died at different periods in time but they all ended up in the same place! It was such a missed opportunity to have fun with this hogpoge of different aesthetics and it sucks because it would have been so visually interesting and engaging!

It also doesn't help that almost everyone is wearing red. And not just red, but the same shade of red as the fucking SKY. Like look at this shit:

Like rip to any colorblind person trying to watch this.

I'm genuinely shocked that this wasn't corrected while redesigning the main cast. Viv went to the School of Visual Arts (SVA), one of the top schools for animation on the East Coast. I refuse to believe she didn't learn how bad this in school.

This is one of the only areas in which Helluva Boss is actually better than Hazbin. The imps all have the same color palette, red white and black, but because they regularly travel to other rings of Hell, earth, and interact with other beings in Hell like, sinners, succubi, hellhounds, the Sins, etc.... they stand out. The imps don't blend into the background (as often) like the Hazbin cast does.

But because the Hazbin cast can't travel to the other rings of Hell according to the lore (which I don't mind), then it was up to Viv and the other designers on the team to find a creative solution to make the characters stand out against the bright red sky. Instead they made it infinitely worse than the pilot by putting everyone in red.

At least in the pilot, Charlie wore pink and black, Vaggie wore grey and white, Angel wore white, Nifty had a splash of yellow etc... But now literally 90% of the cast is in the same shade of bright red as Alastor and the SKY. Like we get it they're in Hell they don't need to wear red to convey that because the SKY is red and has a fucking PENTAGRAM IN IT. We know the hotel is in Hell it doesn't need to be red either

The best scenes in the show visually so far are when the characters aren't outside or in the hotel. For example:

Charlie in the Heaven clocktower, Angel dancing in Poison, Angel and Husk outside the bar (I know I just said when they aren't outside but that background has enough variety of color that it actually works very well)

I am honest to God baffled how this wasn't corrected. Its like, Character Design 101, how was Viv allowed to get away with this?

Anyway

CW: brief mention of abuse

Those are my first impressions on Hazbin Hotel the official series. I know there are only 4 episodes out but the fact that the series started like this is genuinely concerning. Viv was given the opportunity of a lifetime, what started as a indie project was picked up by a well respected studio and distributed by Prime Video. She gained a massive fanbase right off the bat and had all the tools to make this series something special. People are tired of the oversaturation of remakes and reboots and sequels and prequels and spin offs and live actions and whatever that seeing a new show with a whole new concept and setting and characters is exciting! Not many big studios are willing to invest in bold new ideas anymore. People are starving for something new, but when the new stuff is, well, this, its pretty disappointing.

I'm going to continue watching Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss because despite the many glaring issues both shows have, I do still find them entertaining.

I don't mind all the swearing, (even when it does get annoying), I don't mind the sense of humor, I'm not too offended by the Tumblr Sexyman artstyle. I'm a musical theater lover, so I don't mind the musical numbers, especially with such a stacked talented cast. I can personally handle darker, more intense topics like Angel's abuse.

I was excited for the series to premiere, I'm excited for future episodes, and I honestly believe the reason why I still find these shows enjoyable is because I love doing breakdowns like this. I love analyzing the media I consume, I love understanding how and why shows fail, and bad shows have more to analyze than good shows do lmfao.

And don't get me wrong, there are things about the series that I really love as they are! But that's for a different post lol.

If you're still reading this I hope you enjoyed my review Hazbin Hotel so far. I know in the past I said I was prepared to not engage with the fandom at all because there was too much drama and the hatedom is honestly equally, if not more annoying than the fandom, but I couldn't resist doing a whole long ass post about the show, jaja. I have too much fun with this sort of stuff!

[firespirited]

Confession time. After destiel went canon and broke tumblr, I read the entire wiki for the main characters before watching the final episodes and felt the finale was so out of character that I mentally wrote a fix it fic.

Here is me writing it down in honour of the third anniversary. A show that to me: consists of 3 episodes, a lot of meta posts that trended over the years, jokes about loving your car, some manic wiki reading and that odd dude who inexplicably did iffy prolapse photomanip fanart.

I have made no attempts to polish this. The voices probably aren't right but I tried to write an open ending that stays true to characterisation (aka as tumblr presented these three beloved characters which may be the opposite of what the writers of manly male, rock loving, hunters with guns in a muscle car and dead girlfriends had in mind) .

We follow the final episode as it began except after the pie festival and the vamp mime first murder, they're off to hunt but a flaming meteor falls from the sky and they follow it in the car. It hits a field, they see a human figure, run and use their coats and feet to put out the flames. It's Cas. They put him in the car, they're all very shaken no answers to Sam's many questions, awkward glances in the mirror from Dean then Cas breaks his silence and asks for his slice of pie... the one in the glove box. Sam is confused, Dean looks like he's going to vomit.

We restart the episode from a different point of view: After Castiel got sent to the empty, Dean began praying to whomever, whatever would hear (silently or under his breath but constantly.) he thinks he might be insane from grief but after all he's seen he has the smallest hope) . Jack as God can't technically rewrite all the laws of the universe but he's receiving these "prayers". He smirks when he finds a bylaw that he can make a saint of Castiel so that prayers to him are redirected straight to him and cannot be diverted (heaven's bureaucracy is complex).

The empty has known no peace for six months. Dean's internal monologue of prayer has been echoing around and amplified the more the empty tried to create silence. The empty has tried to kill Dean so many times but he's got a protective barrier on his hand that looks like a scratch (placed by a grateful angel) so he's been dodging these deaths like it's looney tunes, completely unaware. (insert scenes of echoey overlapping narration of longing and yearning over near misses of murder by multiple means. For angst broken up by comedy)

Back to now, to the car. The brothers staring at Cas, Dean gets out of the car to hyperventilate and try to hold it together. We focus in on the ringing and rushing blood sound in his ears as Sam seems to be asking questions again and Cas seems to be talking. Sam gets out of the car, asks his brother if he's OK, he obviously lies and says Yes.

Sam sighs and says "Yeah clearly, you look fantastic. So uh Cas says he wants in on the vampire mimes and is eager to do more hunting evil... and I know it's not the time but damnit when is ever the right time? ... Look, when I talked about a more normal life, I meant it. We write our own stories and maybe it's time for you to go try something, anything else really. How about you take a vacation? Cas and I will handle things."

"I've, well, I've given normal life a lot of thought, I've never truly fit in and I could try but I can only fake it for so long. Funny, but when I allowed myself to daydream of a different life, I imagined careers that led me back to the road and back to making things right, you know? I think at the core, that's who I am... And, hey, since you brought it up, I never asked you if this life is the 'normal' you want....To be honest: I know it's not. and I didn't want to be alone, at least not these past few months, I know I've seemed fine but"

"Oh no no, you did not seem 'fine' but I wasn't going to go out of my way to point it out. You didn't even wash for days at your worst. You mumble under your breath sometimes. Those guns are cleaned down to the last speck of dust. I wasn't going to leave you alone, not ever."

"Okay - Ok.ay! Since we're here having the 'talk', aside from your duty as my brother, have YOU let yourself imagine what you'd want normal to be, for you?"

He blurts out "Eileen... It's Eileen. I know she's out there somewhere, I felt a strange pang and it was relief." he's speaking so fast "She's back. My mind races at the possibilities, I haven't dared to let myself start. I'm not sure how I want to live but I know it has to be with Eileen"

"I'm calling a taxi. You have a serious phone call and some travel ahead. Older brother's orders. I'll do the blood suckers"

"Work again. Will you ever open up about what's been going on with you? You wouldn't even tell me how Cas summoned the Empty."

"I, uh, these things take time, more of an actions over words kinda guy. *stares at phone* Oh your taxi is two minutes out."

"I don't know what to say"

"You don't have to say anything, you already told me through all you've done. Text me when you arrive safely, or don't, if you're otherwise occupied"

"You're the worst. And the best." They hug

A car pulls up, Sam yells at Cas though the window that they'll talk soon and to keep Dean out of trouble. Cas gives him a thumbs up.

Dean gets back into the car after watching the taxi drive away until it's completely out of view. He hands the vamp case notes to Cas to read, instead Cas puts them aside on the seat. "It could be the six months, it could be the new body: this appears to be an empty copy, my host was spared the empty thankfully. Yes it could be the new body but you were right this pie is exactly to my taste"

"I don't want to know do I?"

"Indeed, you'd be mortified, it's a word you used a lot about your inner conflicts but, you've faced hell, I promise that voicing your thoughts isn't as terrible."

"Uh your coat and top are burned and falling apart, here have my jacket."

"I mean, voicing your feelings can get you sent to the empty but that's the worst case scenario"

"Nice. Reassuring." *goes quiet*

A phone dings, Cas pulls it out of the jacket. "You have a new message from Sam: "Eileen fine and well, two exclamation marks" aww, he's going to Eileen? She's wonderful isn't she? "meeting at station at 3am. Capital T, A L K and get answers from Cas you idiot skull emoji skull emoji laugh crying emoji"

"Vamps first... then I need a drink" Dean looks out of the window with a mixture of apprehension and giddiness, there's a small smile creeping across his lips that fades into seriousness, there's a flash of fear, then the smile returns with a tremor as if despite himself.

Various old friends are sat around in heaven: they reminisce, they can't know the boys future but they know it's nothing they can't handle, the senseless cruelty is over.

[the-monkey-ruler]

So, to be clear, demons are born because they were humans who did bad things in their past lives, and that's why they were born as demons in their next lives?

Heavenly gods and immortals can also be turned into demons/Yaoguai, right?

Does that mean that those who were born as animals (who cultivate to take human form) may have done bad things too? or not necessarily so. However, I have noticed that in most Yaoguai animals that later cultivate to become human, a common goal is that they want to become completely human in their next reincarnations.

So, to be clear, demons are born because they were humans who did bad things in their past lives, and that's why they were born as demons in their next lives?

No that is not the case most of the time. At least in most if not all the stories I have read.

While I do think that humans CAN turn into Yaogaui if they were evil in a past life I think that they mostly come back as a ghost (which is a type of yao so yeah) or perhaps could regain their memories of their past life in like VERY circumstantial situations but it is rarely the case that a human in a past life would come back as a yaoguai. Like they don't even really reincarnate if they were human before, rather just turning into yaoguai right away and avoiding the wheel of reincarnation altogether. For a normal human, they would more likely spend their time in hell living out their karma and then being reincarnated as a plant or animal to rebuild their karma. They would lose all their past memories so the chances of them remembering their past life and from there being able to cultivate long enough to get a humanoid form would also be very difficult.

I'm not saying it isn't impossible and I'm sure there are a few stories out there that I'm missing but I just never personally hear of them.

I've talked about this before here but just to reiterate Yaoguai isn't really something you just born into since yaoguai children are so rare and that yaoguai are considered to be abnormal creations and thus should not be created.

Yaoguai are mostly created in two different ways

Cultivated creatures - living creatures and inorganic substances other than humans will also cultivate qi (mana/energy), wisdom, or look completely similar to humans through years of cultivation. Such a situation has always been called “成精 (Chengjing)”, “Yaoguai” and “Yaojing” are most often called such creatures, and only a few are called “仙 (Xian)” They skip the reincarnation cycles as only Humans are allowed to cultivate and therefore they very being goes against nature.

Demoted gods - some gods were relegated to the mortal world and became Yaoguai because they violated the laws of heaven. The most representative ones are Zhu Bajie and Sha Wujing. In addition, in the Journey to the West in the heavenly court, there are also some people who violate the laws and deviate from the mortal, but privately descend. Many of them are waiters and mounts around the gods, such as the Golden and Silver Horned Kings of the Taishang Laojun, Yellow Robe Demon, which was originally Kui Mulang, Maitreya Bodhisattva’s Yellow Brows Great King, Manjushri’s Azure Lion and so on.

Heavenly gods and immortals can also be turned into demons/Yaoguai, right?

I've only seen gods in heaven being able to become yaogaui, I haven't seen immortals without a heavenly title turning into demons.

There are a lot of modern media bout evil cultivist that can take power from yaoguai and low-key do kinda turn into yaoguai but I haven't really seen this in like older mythology personally. Not saying it isn't a thing just that I haven't seen it. Gods on the other hand I see far more like in Xiyouji where they abandon their post and leave to earth to become powerful demons.

Does that mean that those who were born as animals (who cultivate to take human form) may have done bad things too? or not necessarily so.

So it gets a little bit fuzzy on these details cause in the wheel in reincarnation is usually like hells, ghosts, animals, humans, Asura, and gods (there are different wheels depending on which mythos you looking at but this is the one I'm the most use to). Animals are considered to be lower than Humans and thus it usually follows that if you die then you should be reborn as another human in the next life and if you did good or bad then you get a good or bad life in the next life to reflect the hard work you did in your last life.

And if you turn into an animal in your next life then it is considered that you didn't have another good karma to be a human. I have heard other ideas that if your life energy is just weakened or that you need to heal then you are also turned into an animal. So I can't say the blanket statement 'only bad people turn into animals' as it could be a lot of different things depending on the mythos. But yes, usually if a human doesn't have enough good karma they turn into an Animal in the next life in the hopes they can gain enough good karma so they can be humans in the next life and retry again in the human game.

In this sense, I can't say that you should think of animals as like 'bad people' cause they have no memories of their past lives in this regard and thus can't be considered the same person. Just that they are a new being that is living out the life that their past life set up. Animals can gain new life energy in their lives and thus being very different from their past life's accumulated life energy.

I have never seen a story personally (that isn't a ghost yao or demated god) where an animal or object remembers their past life and cultivates trying to become human again. Most, if not all Yaogaui, I have read have their own desires and autonomy and wish to be human because that is considered to be a higher domain than animal. I've only seen more modern media where animals kinda remember their past lives and cultivate but I haven't seen this in older mythos.

So that is to say I think that you can consider yaoguai as their own person just like anyone because their past lives ain't who they are in their current life.

However, I have noticed that in most Yaoguai animals that later cultivate to become human, a common goal is that they want to become completely human in their next reincarnations.

Yes, Yaogaui cheats so to speak and that is why they are considered to be abnormal. Animals are meant to live out their lives normally to build up their karma and become human in their next life. Yaogaui however skip this part and instead of building karma they instead cultivate it to get a human life in their current life.

I haven't seen a lot of Yaoguai that talk about their next life as most have the goal to be human in their current life. I would say that if they were thinking about their next life then it would have been smarter for them to stay in their animal form and focus on gaining good karma to be a human in the next life rather than going against the laws of nature and trying to be human in their current life.

At least in the stories I'm more used to it def the case but maybe I just haven't seen a lot of stories where yaoguai have deeper discussions talking about their next lives. I'm seen most trying to cultivate to being full human in their first life and thus trying to get enough qi to perfect their bodies.

[uroborosymphony]

   Flamingos.

   2023, May. Ara's reminiscence of a gentle past, of love and friendship with @velvetineblue and @ofgentleresolve.

I was in his arms that day, in the evening, in the smallness of my college dorm room. Not the palace of my dreams yet I cannot prevent myself from smiling at the thought of these small yet somehow warm walls. I believe I've never truly been at home before meeting him, hence every single corner of earth we ever shared became Home, he is my Home. His fingers were running down the skin of my exposed shoulders, arms and palms as he was adoring every single inch of it, tender. It was in the late June, the windows open on a gentle night, a gentle breeze. He was smelling of summer and gasoline, after he left the boys behind, them causing havoc in the south of the city while he was here, giving me a little piece of the heaven he was. How was your day. He questionned, in a voice that was made of honey, deep and calming and loving and caring. My days were easily influenced by my swings, of moods and needs and rages and angers, even back in the days I was a little unstable like that. Hard to handle, not truly liked by many. It was harder to carry however, as I was lacking the maturity to simply let it go, let it flow, to consider myself above childish quarrels and wars, ones I was even starting against the other students looking down on me the way they do. Often I was getting disciplined, which was multiplying my hunger for more battles. I did not want anybody to control me, anybody to tell me what to do. You will be a brillant doctor Jung, but that attitude will cost you a lot. Would say one of these professors who liked my story, admired the fact I was from a dirty side of the road yet was fighting for a better life, wanted to help me.

"Tai. I think I have... a friend?"

My words came out as a confused confession, the type that comes in a gigglish voice, the type a young girl would make at the simple thought of finally connecting with someone in a hostile environment. I had friends, more or less, Taiyang's became mine, adopting me in their tribe, respecting me as his woman, his new sidekick for life, the one they would whistle him about when he would kiss me on his motorcycle. The young girls at the orphanage I was keeping an eye on, they were my friends as well, in a way, or perhaps little sisters under my care. I did not truly have a friend of my own, a friend to link arms with, a friend to share a melting ice cream with under the August sun, until I met her. "Mmmm, should I be a little jealous here?" He joked, catching the giddy smile on my lips, his index finger pushing my chin up as I was looking at him above my shoulder, my head pressed against his chest. I laughed out loud, the crescents of my eyes slowly folding. "Don't be silly," I said, perhaps a little enable to control this innocent joy of mine slipping through my grin. "But yeah, maybe you should," I replied with on a teasing tone causing him to laugh as well and lovingly bite a piece of my ear.

"Her name is Annie."

Her name was Annie. A girl from abroad. Our paths crossed a little early in the year and kept on crossing over and over again until we sit side by side, on the daily, down the library's outdoor stairs. A transfer student always attracts the attention, like a prey, regular students being the predators seeking new faces, new blood and new companionships. I never truly understood that, this need for something new, something fresh, something different like a source of entertainment and routine escapism. Perhaps I am a flamingo then, a creature that mates for life. I do believe there will only be a few presences in my life, a few ones I give a place to in my intimacy, in my heart, in my life, just them. Them, I wouldn't need more. My eyes crossing Taiyang's in 2013, I knew I loved him in all my lifetimes, has died and would die all over again for him as the universes will keep on bringing us back together. Hearing Annie's voice in 2018, I knew I wanted her to be my friend and that she would always be, no matter the countries, no matter the years that later would come in between us. I happened to be surprisingly shy during our first conversations with her. The type of shyness that screamed how much I wanted to ask her to perhaps go shopping with me, ane share a bubble tea in the grass while talking about little nothings. He smiled when I tell him all that, that type of warm smile I bask into, that type of warm smile that he always gives me. I feel a little silly, being a grown enough woman asking him if it's strange to give one of my bracelets to Annie on the day she will go back to America. He presses a kiss against my temple, he calls me lovely. The way he adores me makes him believe everyone else would adore me just as much. Perhaps what was the most foreign to me was this feeling, this feeling of belonging, this feeling of letting your guards down when finally, finally, you find the ones to make you smile, the ones to make you feel safe like I've never felt safe before, when finally, you find your flamingos.

[rickie-the-storyteller]

The Looking Glass...

Hey guys! Great news...

I want to finally share who the mystery blogger is.

Just kidding lol. But I wanted to talk about it a bit more on here, since people have started to speculate about it (which is great btw!) and I wanted to go over its background and overall role in the story a little bit more.

I've gotten a lot of interesting guesses. Some of which make sense. Others that... well, don't. To put it as simply as possible. But that makes sense, seeing as I haven't shared much about it. Until now!

The Looking Glass wasn't always this controversial blog - it started out as an innocent space where the writer would share their opinions on life and words of wisdom, as well as their own creations and interests (whether that was poems/stories they liked to write, artwork they did, songs and playlists they'd listen to, videos, books/tv shows/movies they enjoyed or whatever else). In fact, it never used to be called "The Looking Glass." It was called "Geek Heaven." And it was written by a self-proclaimed geek (Obviously lol).

It wasn't until around November 2010 that the name changed to what it is currently (after several years of no posts at all, after one of their most popular posts got a ton of backlash and traction), and the whole site got a complete makeover. It got revamped into the blog it is by the events of book 2 - deep dives, commentary and analysis of news, trending world events and stories. While that was a small amount of what the blog used to do, it was now entirely what it was. And evidently, this was a good move. The Looking Glass picked up a LOT of popularity in a short span of time, and by the events of UVC, it had nearly a million followers (mainly from the UK, but in other places as well), got nominated for a bunch of awards (including the "Best New Creator Award," which was usually given to YouTubers) and was seen as a reliable source of news and info by a lot of people due to how well written and well researched it was, despite being run by an amateur.

What I will say about the identity of the blogger is that it's rather convoluted... I'm honestly still trying to make that aspect of the story a little more simple/neater, especially in the third instalment (which is where Stephanie finally finds out who it is. I will be sharing what I've got for book 3 so far at some point, don't worry). It isn't just a clear-cut answer of one singular person (I mean, it is. But other people are responsible for it, if that makes sense. This is why there are a ton of red herrings within this mystery - many people are related, but not every single one of those people is the blogger lol).

Another small clue I'll give is that it isn't Stephanie's stalker. You know that plot point of her being wary of someone seemingly stalking her once she starts the investigation? Yeah, that creepy person following her around and trying to freak her out isn't the same person who's been writing about her online. A few people think it is the same person, but it isn't. I won't tell you who the stalker is here, since that's not what this post is about, but to give you a little hint, it is another person we know. Not incredibly well, but still.

Here are the most popular guesses (as far as I know):

Alice - I think I've straight up said it wasn't her in the past... but one or two people think I've been lying about that lol (and by that, I mean my friends from school). I'm not. Making that clear right now. Alice is actually one of the main people trying to figure out the identity of the blogger. And fun fact - she actually finds out before Steph does. I guess she is a bit of a detective lol.

Ben - A guess I got when discussing this plot element with some friends... I noticed that most guesses where from the female characters, so I pointed out that I never mentioned gender in the blog's title or description. So then people started pointing at Ben (and other guys, but Ben mostly) since it would be a major twist if it were him. And I agree with that... but Ben technically already has a major twist in the story lol. Doesn't mean he can't have another one, tho. You know how I'm like.

Holly - Putting this one here for my sister, tbh. She loved the whole Holly storyline from book 1, and she wanted me to bring her character back somehow. And she does appear in book 3 briefly (that news will make her happy lol). It's interesting to think about, though, since Holly's whole thing was that she got expelled for cyberbullying and had to leave... only to be 'replaced' by Steph the following year. Like, she took Holly's place in the friend group. So there's a bit of a connection there, even if the two girls haven't officially met yet.

Bret - Another huge twist if it were true. And it sort of works on some level... He and Steph get really close in the sequel, and she does confide in him a lot. Alice also guesses him at one point due to not being able to trust him anymore. Understandable, I guess, considering what he does in the sequel.

Aisha - Haven't talked much about her or her sister on here, but I have with my school friends. They thought she's a good pick for the blogger because she's a writing student with the same level of sassiness that Alice has. It fits nicely, you must admit. Plus the other characters don't know her particularly well, but she is very observant and is good at getting to know other people.

Charlie - Red herring. But it fits well in terms of his general attitude. Another quick little fun fact - out of all the people to not know from the beginning, this guy is the first to find out. Not that that changes the overall narrative much... I mean, it's not like he does anything big with that info, but it's still rather cool.

Elise - Last person I'll mention here. This is a more recent guess I've got, so I thought I'd mention it. It's another one that would be a huuuuuge twist in the story if it were true, especially knowing what Elise is like as a character... and considering her arc throughout the story (especially her role as a rival to Steph in book 3. I felt like that was a logical step for her in book 3, since book 2 was her realising the reality of having Steph as a friend, and deciding that that wasn't what she wanted). She's very principled and very much about finding justice and truth, and she is also deeply hurt by a lot of Stephanie's actions, so there's some motivation to her potentially being the blogger as well... I'd say this fits, too.

I got other guesses, too (my fave being Dylan lol. Imagine freaking Dylan being the blogger lol. Connor was another one that got me🤣), but these ones are the most popular and intriguing to me.

Who do you think it could be? Let me know your thoughts!

More Steph's Crew-related stuff coming soon (as well as my plans for the blog as we wrap up 2023 and move on into the new year).

[what-gs-watching]

This week on...

Ok gang. Here we go, I'm gonna start this thing in earnest.

I’m G. I'm a grown ass woman. With a house, and a dog and a husband, and a (difficult) job.

But I fucking love content. TV shows, movies, a good spotify playlist. Maybe my emotions are broken, but for the past few years, content has been the best way to feel something other than the everyday minutiae. And maybe we can thank COVID for a lot of that.

Because yo, once we went on lockdown, I just started binging. Basically, everything. While my husband was off doing his own thing (tiktok, amiright) I was watching literally EVERYTHING. And I wanted to talk about it.

So I started doing a thing. I'd rush into whatever room my husband was in and start talking at him about what I was streaming at the time. Spewing out these ridiculously terrible synopses of episodes with intricate plots, trying to boil it down so he could follow whatever it was I was ranting about because I had to express why the show was gnawing at me or making me feel shit. And most of the time he'd stare at me blankly and then chuckle.

Eventually I decided to start my rant by announcing "THIS WEEK, ON WHAT G'S WATCHING - " and bless his soul, he'd mostly tolerate my diatribes. (Around this time I was watching Fringe, and he'd know I was coming because he'd hear me scream "PREVIOUSLY ON FRINGE" about 45 minutes prior.)

At some point, I started doing it at my sister as well - this poor woman has two small babies all up in her house and I'd just be texting her about WTF was going on with my show, always announcing "this week, on what g's watching..." and every time she'd simply send back "unsubscribe."

So clearly, I hadn't found my audience. But honestly y'all, I think it's funny. And it's a way to get all of this, whatever this is, out. So I've decided maybe the best course of action is to just scream it into this dark and endless void. Maybe internet strangers will appreciate it. And maybe not. Either way, my sister will appreciate being removed from the mailing list.

All that to say: this week on what g's watching - Good Omens.

On repeat.

Am I literally in the middle of my third rewatch of the entire thing in only like, 2 weeks time? Yes. Should I be ashamed of that? Probably.

But fuck it. Season two punched me in the face and the butt and the heart and I went down a fucking rabbit hole. It may or may not be how I ended up on Tumblr (I guess I thought I was a grown ass woman). It may or may not be eating me alive.

Liking completely inappropriate memes? Check. Stumbled into some fanfiction? That's neither here nor there. Reading long-winded posts about whether it was Aziraphale's fault or Crowley's fault, wherein everyone has their own tinfoil-hat theory? Oh yeah. I'm in deep, folks.

I'm not gonna lie, it usually doesn't get this bad. I watched the entirety of Supernatural (all the while yelling "why are they so obsessed with each other? I don't understand why I'm still watching this!" through FIFTEEN goddamn seasons) and even still, I didn't get pulled in like this. And that fandom is so crazy.

At the time I finished Supernatural, I thought it'd be my comfort show, and I restarted it. But, just kidding.

Good Omens has taken over literally everything.

So to the actual point. A ridiculous synopsis of season 2 because I can't get it out of my goddamn brain:

A sweet looking, chubby tow-headed (kind of former? retired?) angel that owns a bookshop wherein no books are ever sold, Aziraphale, and his gorgeous, hip-swiveling (retired? disgraced?) demon companion (friend? best friend? partner?) Crowley stalk around their London neighborhood hiding a dick-faced archangel who can't remember why he is such a dick-face, from both heaven and hell, while meddling in the love lives of other shop owners and talking PAST each other about what the eff is ACTUALLY going on, and ALSO flashing back to 6,000 years worth of their own ridiculously adorable and infuriating interactions.

It's a fucking love story, kids. In the worst and most beautiful ways possible. And I just. can't.

And so. I guess, here we are? This may or may not turn into anything. But for now. Shouting into the void…

[jungwnies]

*peeks shyly from the door*

hi

hey baby girl, how are you?

sorry for being a lil mia, I gotta admit october wasn’t the best month for me and november isn’t looking that great either (not worse but not better just a little meh), some stuff happened personally and let’s just say I’ve been in the need of a break

good/bad news is that im officially starting therapy once again tomorrow! yup, last month really set the line for it hehe

it’s a little bittersweet you know, thinking you’re getting better but then not idk just really blue u.u

but okay! i didn’t come here to make you gloomy, i mean yeah last month sucked but at least taylor dropped a new album ^^

also ive been talking and getting closer with my dad a lot these past few weeks so that’s nice, actually the whole reason why im back in therapy is cause he cares and got really worried about my state so gotta thank dad!<33

i also loved seulgi’s solo debut (slaaay) and last time i popped in here i started rewatching glee and guess who already finished it? me :D

i also rewatched shadowhunters and now im starting ted lasso! (I’ve heard is a great show and so far so good!)

kinda shocked tho it’s already November and omg the end of the years is in a couple of weeks omG STOP

n e ways, what have you been up to? my guess is school but tell me how do you feel about it? or if you don’t want to talk about school that’s okay just tell me how you’ve been and how you’ve enjoyed your days? ^^

sending lots of love to you darling

i don’t know when I’ll pop back in here so as usual: eat your meals, drink your water, listen to your favorite artists, read/write when you want to and don’t overwork yourself <33

you can do it! 파이팅 ^^

-🧸anon

omg hi :) i'm so sorry to hear the past two months have been SUCKY, but i'm glad you've gotten a break because everyone needs one at some point !!! therapy is never something bad, the reason for going might not be the best reason but the outcome will be better than nothing, right? <3 omg... also i love taylor's album, some of my fav songs on there are maroon, snow on the beach, and lavender haze 🫶 it's always nice to be recognized by a parent and receive their love and care, so i'm glad you've got comfort, love, and support from your dad. 28 reason by seulgi is actually heaven sent, it's sooooo good omg ?!?!?! there's only a few weeks left in the year, i feel like this year passed by sooo quickly it's bittersweet LOL

lately i've been super busy, i got a job recently (i love it so much, it's so easy but all my coworkers are so fun and sweet) and school has been pretty chill, exams started though so i'm studying like there's no tomorrow LMFAO

i also got post nasal drip so i'm like suffering from a dry cough, it hurts so much LMFAO... i just got medicine for it today so hopefully it goes away soon 👍

i started love in contract, i also finished it and it was one of the best kdramas i've watched 10/10 recommend

make sure you eat your meals, drink your water, listen to your favorite artists as well <3

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

088 of 2024

Created by brelee

How have you been doing?

Pretty fine, except that I'm a bit tired. I'm having fun preparing for our trip.

Anything you're looking forward to?

Yeah, our vacation in Poland. Only a few days left.

Do you or anyone you know play the violin?

I know my sister can play some violin, but except her, no.

Do you have a nice view out of the closest window?

Nah, just our lame backyard XD

What is one of your favorite breakup songs?

I don't like love songs at all, with a few exceptions, and one would be Nu Wij Niet Meer Praten by Jaap Reesema & Pommelien Thijs.

Do you know anyone named Georgia or George?

Yea my name is a local variant of George if it counts.

What age did you learn how to ride a bike?

I was 3, for real. Never needed supporting wheels either.

Are you currently listening to music or watching TV?

Watching TV, it's one of my favourite TV shows.

What is your morning routine?

Morning meds, shower, food.

Are you someone who gets easily agitated by hearing someone chewing?

If they're obnoxious with it, then yes.

What was the last text you sent?

Something about our cat.

What did you last have to eat?

I just cooked a veggie soup and I'm eating it now.

What's your favorite kind of oatmeal/porridge?

Cooked on milk and flavoured with cinnamon and chocolate.

Have you ever ate a whole pizza in one sitting?

Nah, it's too much.

What are some things you are grateful for?

Having my life saved, being independent despite physical disability, my husband, my cat.

What's the last thing you done while outside?

We went to Melle to leave our teenager at his friend's.

How often do you do laundry?

Every week.

Have you already had your birthday this year?

Yeah, in April.

Last thing you done before this survey?

Cooking a soup.

Do you like sleeping with multiple pillows?

Yeah, I have three.

How many candles do you have in your bedroom?

A few, but not for lighting.

What emojis have you used the most here recently?

Probably the green heart.

What color is your favorite shirt?

Black, and it's a band t-shirt from Vildhjarta.

Do you currently smell food cooking?

Yup, because I just cooked.

If you were given $1,000 to spend at one store. What's your store of choice?

Electronics store, definitely.

How much sugar do you consume on a daily basis?

Not much. I don't like sweet things.

Do you have any ice cream in your freezer?

Yeah, quite a few. I don't even know which ones.

What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word "chaos"?

The Universe.

Do you own anything that has an animated character on it?

Yeah, a t-shirt with Marie from the Aristocats.

Have you used a microwave today?

No, not yet. Maybe after I come back home.

What's the last book you read?

Suicide Notes. Nothing unpredictable, though.

What's something that always makes you cringe?

Public displays of affection.

What's a word or phrase you say a lot?

Oioioi.

What's something that always makes you emotional?

Music. For real.

How many times have you changed clothes today?

Twice.

What's on your mind currently?

Our vacation. I have to do some final shopping.

In what ways have you changed over the past year?

I don't think I've changed much.

Do you really care about others opinions of you?

No, I don't. Life is too short for this.

What's your favorite pasta?

Penne. And two other ones, farfalle and one I don't remember the name of.

Do you currently see anything yellow?

Yeah, some cheese.

What song could you imagine playing in heaven and which one would be playing in hell?

In heaven, any of my favourite songs. In hell, Dance Monkey by Tones and I, because I hate this song.

What did you last try to do and failed?

Reaching for something and dropping it, lol at my hand.

Does your bathroom have a certain theme or color scheme?

Nah, it's just grey and white.

If you have Netflix or any streaming service.. what's your favorite shows to stream?

I have live TV apps, too, and I stream live.

Are you currently wearing anything red?

No, not at the moment.

What was the last thing that caught your eye while shopping?

Apple jenever lol.

What's a social media site you have no interest in?

All of them.

Have you ever tripped and fallen in a public place?

Many times lol. Happens to everyone, I guess.

When did you last buy a dairy product?

Today, we bought eggs and butter.

What's the last song you sang out loud?

I don't remember.

[sadandpoutyandfrench]

Idol Land update is out and no end of service announcement. Are we all a bunch of Chicken Littles squawking that the sky is falling or is there something there to the doomsaying? Well, regardless our MyCharas will live to die another day.

Personally I'm optimistic. I'd like to believe Idol Land can make it at least to its first anniversary. Naïve? Maybe. In denial? Definitely. Am I in denial about being in denial? Most certainly.

But thinking about idol Land ending got me thinking about other end of service games I've lived through.

This got long so . . .

Naturally, PriPuz is one of the first that comes to mind. This was before I had either my smartphone or my tablet so instead I played it on my PC via emulation on BlueStacks. Oof, that was a bit rough. Playing with a computer mouse for dragging was not intuitive at all. Most times I was lucky to get a decent score.

Next, Wake Up, Girls! Shinsei no Tenshi aka WUGten. This was a browser game, one of many boneheaded decisions made by the people in charge of the WUG group and franchise. The game was available through Rakuten and for a very short period available worldwide until quickly being locked to Japan only. So despite having my tablet I had to resort to my computer and a VPN (any attempt I made to get it working on a tablet didn't go through). I actually have a video of me playing this one!

The audio is Not Great. The sound effects will probably hurt your ears a bit. This was one of my early attempts at recording anything through my computer. This video has been up for five years and sits below 700 views. Look at that very ambitious Episode 1 on the thumbnail.

As you can tell, it's a bit laggy. Doing those flick notes on the computer was tricky but it looks like I managed. Watching this kind of reminds me of Idol Land in ways. I was just so excited to be playing a Wake Up, Girls! themed rhythm game that I was 100% willing to look past any jankyness involved.

It's impossible to disassociate the end of WUGten with the dissolution of the Wake Up, Girls! idol group itself. I wonder if the game would have lasted longer if they were still around. Of course, I wonder a lot of things about Wake Up, Girls!, questions that will likely remain with me, unanswered, for a long time.

Mega Miracle Force, a fighting game crossing over a bunch of Compile Heart games. Of course, I was in for it exclusively for Hyperdimension Neptunia. One of the key selling points was two different characters fused together to make a new one.

I understood almost nothing about how to play and there weren't many helpful English resources in the long run but I think I managed to make my way around well enough.

I had three different accounts. I lost the first one and stopped playing on my second run after some point. The transfer system at the time was similar to Idol Land in that the code only lasted for a short while so when I got my smartphone I had to start anew. Fortuitous as the game went down a few months later.

Magia Record EN. This was a frustrating one. I got into the game when the anime started airing. Sadly seems the anime wasn't enough because Aniplex shut this one down before season 2 even aired. I don't remember how far I got in but I don't think it was much.

And finally, she is the one named

Sailor Moon Drops! This was my Candy Crush, a Sailor Moon themed Match 3 game? Heaven. It's also the only English translated Sailor Moon game we're ever going to see, probably.

I get why Bandai might have closed this one down? Yeah, I guess. Do I still wish they had kept it up in some form, even without providing any new content? Hell yes. Other Match 3 games just don't scratch that same itch

So there it is, my wall of death, a reminder of how brutal the live service model can be when it comes to mobile games and that no game's lifespan is ever certain.

[lavenderandlaurel]

okay wow that sure was march, huh. some good things and some not-so-good things.

good stuff:

visiting a friend in a nearby city and seeing the mountain goats! also bought more books than I needed and ate some divine vegan bbq

being back in chicago, if only very briefly

finishing a blog post for my main professional organization, which should go live this week

feeling like I'm making steady progress in bouldering - I'm working on a v3 problem that's likely to be taken down before I solve it, but I've gotten so much farther on it than I expected

reading a lot this month: 7 books overall, with a shoutout to roller derby by michella m. marino

doing a big clean of the house over the past week and really noticing the difference

s t r e t c h i n g. more of this next month

practicing piano semi-regularly! it's always such a struggle to sit down at the keyboard but once I do I remember "oh yeah this is fun"

journaling more

practicing chinese on my own while the conversation group I'm part of takes a little break. it feels like some of the new concepts and vocab I've encountered this year are starting to sink in

getting so into heaven official's blessing again even though I've been dancing around the fandom for ages, and on a related note,

writing 8000 words of a new fic that I simply cannot stop thinking about

less good:

on my trip earlier in the month I also visited my hometown at the same time my mom's family was visiting and man! do they get on my nerves

since I got back I have been in suuuuch a cooking slump. rip

my first major exhibit since starting this new job opens in two months and I am fucking stressed about it. it's a guest curator doing the majority of the research and writing the panels, but I am responsible for editing, making the interactives, acquiring all the image rights, doing the evaluation, securing the object loans, and ultimately making sure visitors have a good and interesting time. I'm still figuring out how this team works, how long different things take, and when things need to be ready to be handed off to other people, and I feel like I'm making a giant mess out of it even though it's probably fine. such a good :) opportunity :) to work on my default perfectionism :)))

relatedly, my anxiety has been through the fucking roof in the past few weeks to the point of making me physically ill. weirdly, this doesn't help me get anything done to relieve the task-related anxiety

I have basically done no work at all on the historic preservation side gig this month, which is a problem. however, I did pick it back up again this weekend and managed to make some progress. trying to be nice to myself about it

finances. augh.

[callsign-smalls]

Ancient Dreams In A Modern Land

Chapter Two: “Burn With Me, Heaven’s On Fire”

*4 days later.

Madelyn POV

"So Dean, when is this 'oh so special' guest of yours going to show up? You know, the one you refuse to tell me hardly anything about?" I ask my older brother as I walk into the living room, glancing up at the clock on the wall. "Because if they're riding with us to the venue, they need to show up in the next fifteen minutes or else we're leaving without them."

Dean lets out a small chuckle, just shaking his head. "Take a deep breath and relax Maddie, it's gonna be fine. He got here while you were in the shower earlier?"

"He?" I retort, raising an eyebrow. "You know I don't judge Deano, but um, I didn't know that you were in to guys."

"Well, until I met him, I didn't exactly know either." Dean explains, rubbing the back of his neck. "He's honestly a really great guy Maddie, you should know."

"Hold on a second, do I already know this mystery man?"

Dean just grins, nodding his head to someone or something behind me. "Well, you can just turn around and see for yourself."

I look behind me, my eyes quickly widening whenever I see who just walked into the room.

"Gaz?" I ask, my eyebrow raised. "Hold on a second, since when do you know my brother?"

Gaz lets out a small and quiet chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck. "Do you remember when your brother went to London about two years ago?"

I give Kyle a small nod. "Yeah, it was to visit an old BAU teammate of his that had transferred to take over the Interpol office over there."

"Well, the two of us met on the bus while he was over there, and I managed to sweet talk your brother enough to get his number." Gaz explains, looking over at Dean before giving him a quick wink. "I'm sorry we've kept it from you for this long, we just wanted to enjoy the peace in secret for a while."

I raise my hands up, giving Gaz a light shake of my head. "Hey, it's you all's relationship, not mine. I'm just glad that the two of you are happy, that's all."

Gaz just smiles, pulling me in for a tight but quick hug. "Thank you Madelyn, that means a lot."

After a few moments of the three of us chatting while shrugging our coats on, I see a familiar blonde head of hair making its way into the room.

"Hey kiddo, you ready to go?" I ask Austin, who gives me a small nod. "Alright, that's good. You should double check to make sure you have your camera and everything else, because we have to get going here pretty soon."

•        •        •

"Oh come on Maddie, would you please just take a deep breath and relax?" My cousin Daisy asks me, both of her hands currently resting on my shoulders. "You've done this practically a million times before, everything's gonna be fine."

"I know, it's just that it's been a long time since we've been able to do a show, and I've never played guitar in front of this many people before." I reply, rubbing the back of my neck. "I know I'm not lead guitar, but still. It's a little nerve wracking."

"Hey guys, it's about time for us to go on." Dean says as he walks over, our brother Beau right behind him.

"It's gonna be fine, alright?" Daisy says, giving my shoulder a quick squeeze. "You'll be fine Madelyn, and you're gonna do great like you always do. Besides, you'll only be playing guitar until intermission, so it's not even that bad."

The four of us then make our way onstage, each of us giving Austin a fist bump as we walk past him.

Once everyone has gotten settled into their various spots on the stage, I walk up to the microphone with a wide grin on my face.

"Hello everybody! How are y'all doin' out there tonight?" I ask, grinning even wider than before when the crowd cheers in response. "That's good, real good. Now, I think it's about time for us to play a few songs for you guys, huh? What do y'all say?"

I look back at the others, all of us sharing a quick nod before Dean and I begin to play the beginning notes of our first song.

*beginning instrumental*

You are a prisoner of what they wanted you to be, now you're a minister of a brand new reality. Don't you want to get away? Shut down all the voices, all the white noises. Drowning in deeper waves, I gotta get away.

They think they own you, but they don't know you've broken free, better on your own. You're on top of the world, at the top of your lungs. Come on, and shout your freedom!

Victory is what has come alive inside when they've been gone. Shout it out to the world at the top of your lungs. Come on, and shout your freedom!

*short instrumental*

I take a quick glance around at the crowd, grinning from ear to ear when I spot the rest of my family in the crowd.

And now you're flying high, you won't be held down by regrets. You're not just getting by, you're a warrior and proud of it. You don't have to be afraid. Hear how loud your voice is, shut out all the noises. You don't have to be ashamed, so never run away.

They think they own you, but they don't know you've broken free, better on your own. You're on top of the world, at the top of your lungs. Come on, and shout your freedom!

Victory is what has come alive inside when they've been gone. Shout it out to the world at the top of your lungs. Come on, and shout your freedom!

*instrumental*

Dean and I let it all out for the guitar solo, the two of us sporting matching grins as we fly through the various notes.

Victory is born. You'll never go back, you're never going back. Look what you've become. You're flying higher, 'cause you're a fighter.

They think they own you, but they don't know you've broken free, better on your own. You're on top of the world, at the top of your lungs. Come on, and shout your freedom!

Victory is what has come alive inside when they've been gone. Shout it out to the world at the top of your lungs. Come on, and shout your freedom!

•        •        •

Once Beau announces intermission, I make my way off the stage and over to where my family's sitting the bar.

"Holy shit Mads, I honestly forget about the set of pipes you had on you." Phillip says, giving me a small pat on the back. "All of you guys have been doing amazing up there so far."

"You really think so?" I ask my brother, who just gives me a small nod in response. "Well, thank you. I appreciate it."

"And as a small token of respect for doing so well, I'm buyin' you a drink." Phillip tells me, then turns ing around to flag down the bartender.

Once my brother hands me the drink, I take a long swig right as I hear someone walking up behind me.

"I hope that you didn't forget about me lass, because if you did, I'd be truly hurt."

I turn around and nearly yelp in surprise when I see my best friend Johnny standing there.

"Holy- oh my god! Johnny, what are you doin' here?" I ask, pulling the Scotsman in for a tight hug. "I thought you were on an assignment with Price."

Johnny just shrugs. "I was, but when our assignment ended just a few days ago and Gaz told me about your little hidden talent, I figured that I should probably come see what the fuss was all about. Cap's here too, somewhere. I think he's talking with your brother and Gaz about something, I don't really know."

"I'm so glad you're here, you have no idea." I tell Johnny, pulling him in for another hug. "I mean it, thank you for comin'."

Johnny gives me a small nod before taking a sip of his drink. "Yeah, of course. You don't need to thank me though, bonnie. I mean, how could I not take the chance to come see my best girl?"

"Your best girl?" I retort, slowly raising an eyebrow. "And what exactly do you mean by that MacTavish?"

I see unfamiliar movement out of the corner of my eye, looking over to see Daisy making her way towards Johnny and I.

"Hey there Mads, Beau and Dean wanted me to come get you because you he intermission's almost over." Daisy explains, raising her eyebrow slightly as she looks between Johnny and I.

"Will you hold this for me until I get back?" I ask Johnny, smiling whenever he gives me a small nod. "Thanks darlin', you're the best."

I give Johnny a quick kiss on the cheek before following Daisy into the crowd, us girls making our way back over to the side of the stage.

"So, you're gonna tell me all about him later, right?" Daisy asks me, grinning whenever I give her a short nod. "That's my girl."

Once we're all back on the stage, I turn towards the crowd with a new and better sense of energy than before.

"Alright everybody!" I call out, grabbing most of the crowd's attention. "This next song of ours is a cover of a classic song. Y'all feel free to sing along if you know the words."

*beginning instrumental*

Woo-oo-oo!

*short instrumental*

I look at you and my blood boils hot, I feel my temperature rise. I want it all, give me what you got. It's hunger in your eyes.

I'm getting closer, baby hear me breathe. You know the way to give me what I need. Just let me love you and you'll never leave.

Feel my heat, takin' you higher. Burn with me, heaven's on fire. Paint the sky with desire, angel fly, heaven's on fire (woo).

I look around the crowd, grinning widely and giving Johnny a quick wink whenever I spot him in the crowd.

I got a fever ragin' in my heart, you make me shiver and shake. Baby don't stop, take it to the top. Eat it like a piece of cake.

You're comin' closer, I can hear you breathe. You drive me crazy when you start to tease. You could bring the devil to his knees.

Feel my heat, takin' you higher. Burn with me, heaven's on fire. Paint the sky with desire, angel fly, heaven's on fire.

Oh oh, heaven's on fire. Oh oh, heaven's on fire. Oh, oh.

*instrumental*

I'm getting closer, baby hear me breathe. You know the way to give me what I need. Just let me love you and you'll never leave.

Feel my heat, takin' you higher. Burn with me, heaven's on fire. Paint the sky with desire, angel fly, heaven's on fire. Feel my heat, takin' you higher. Burn with me, heaven's on fire.

Paint the sky with desire, angel fly, heaven's on fire. Feel my heat, takin' you higher. Burn with me, heaven's on fire.