#Ya no but rly though
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you're lovely in ways that i just can't explain
testing out new brushes w some lmhs itfs nape kisses :> jjk atla!au with @philosophiums
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itafushi#itadori yuuji#fushiguro megumi#fanart#jjk fanart#jjk atla!au#atla!au: art#atla!au: illust#lmhs#THESE BRUSHES R LIKE CRACK TO ME I LOVE THEM#i.... paid for them.... which i normally never do#but i talked myself into it bc i figured i like them enough and they will probably get enough use to justify the $9 price tag#and im SO glad i did they were worth every gd CENT TH TEXTURE#chalky oily pastely chunky god i cld EAT IT#oh ya the itfs#fr once not much 2 say rly just a tender moonlit moment ??? honestly they r just my vessels (HAH) th real stars r the brushes#this lighting is the closest u will see me get to blue eyed megu btw. this is as much as i am willing to compromise on#also i finally managed to get the Blue Shading On Pink to look right! i love th way it looks sm but its a Hard combo 2 pull off fr me :'>#....lmhs rly pushing the hina use blue agenda i just realized#though ig that rly is just on atla for being so colour coordinated :')#also caption ! radiohead by nightly.....itfs song.....if u care........#EDIT FRGOT THEIR SCARS I NEED TO SLEEEEPPPP#smh fake fan of our own au :((((
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One of Midori's lines in vime is "I won't let you look anywhere else, just look at me"
Do what you will with that info o7
all i can imagine is that he had a hard time singing it with a straight face
though im picking up what youre putting down so i raise you
#doodled in between assignments asmgdjksghsdg#asks#anonymous#who put this normal ass cat into the zoo..... free her.....#im still so astounded by the choice of adding souma and mido into this like. hokke i can understand somewhat#but SOUMA.... my friend souma...#vime is a rly nice song though!! crazy#though i saw someone say it sounds like dangdut and 😭😭😭😭 cmon man i cant listen to it the same after that#sumpah gk bisa mikirin yg lain kalo dengerin lagi. emang suaranya kek dangdut ya akjgmskdjgsd#enstars#doodles#duck scribbles#midoyuzu#going back into the soup now. see you guys in a week maybe OTL
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i love when kiryu ryoma is a good dad to haruka, okay?
#sakamoto ryoma#kiryu kazuma#sawamura haruka#yakuza ishin#yakuza#ishin#like a dragon ishin#look man i just think she's handling the death of her parents suspiciously well#anyway i think ryoma would be unsure how to offer comfort and so would be kinda stiff with it#but haruka appreciates him trying and takes comfort in somebody being there for here <3#now for my opinions:#i'm not sold on the last page being great... it feels like a rly abrupt transition but oh well#coloring this was super fun though#the orange is a little too saturated i think... i'm not sure the sunlight nature comes across the best it could#but ya know what it doesn't have to be perfect. plus i can learn from this#my art
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re: ur reblog (didnt know whether to put it here or there..) graha seems like totally that kind of partner who just gets soo flustered if u hit him with even the smallest compliment at the moments where he least expects it .. like if ur passing him smth u needed and u complimented him he'd stumble over his thoughts for a solid ten seconds
TRULYYYYYY if i think abt him flustered for more than two seconds i start getting sick in the head and have to lay down. i would give him a million little compliments all the time forever if anyone deserves it its him!!!!!!!!!
#fr though. he needs to hear how important he is to me and how much he matters.#starts rolling around on the floor stupid style#also hi clara!!! ^_^ hows your week going <3#asks#OH also you can prooobably send any asks here im actually rly bad at utilizing sideblogs#and mostly use my other blog for rbing other ppls ships and whatnot since i know some ppl dont like bigger/not strictly selfship blogs rbing#so ya asks here is fine!! ^^
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everyone pray for me that i did not just give myself food poisoning (;･∀･)
#i may have made a bad decision with the meat i cooked shdjdkl BUT I THINK IT'LL BE FINE#it was past the date on the packaging but it didnt smell or look or feel off at all so . i decided to risk it#and now im panicking bc i think perhaps that was actually rly stupid fhdkdl#but it was. so much money. i had no idea the date was so soon on the package when i got it from mum#I would've frozen it if I'd known dhdksl i should've looked#alas !!! i think it'll be fine tbh bc it genuinely did not seem spoiled at all so ... now we just pray#i had a fairly small serving of it and I'll see how i feel to figure out if the rest of it is safe to eat or not#im just fhdjdkl crying a little rn bc the past two days have been so awful and im so tired#i rly dont want to get sick on top of everything else going on#i would like one thing to go well fjdkdl just like. one thing. this feels like divine punishment for having the old lady group go so well#im just kind of losing my mind rn i think actually fhfkdl i have a therapy/counseling appt on monday though so we'll see if that helps#i do not have high hopes fjfkdl#MANNNN. can the universe give me a break PLEASE. I've been trying so hard the past three weeks to do well 😭😭#im putting in so much work and effort fhdksl can i PLEASE have this one thing go okay djdksl i do not want to get sick !!!#if i do get sick then im just. hhhhh. idk djdkdl it's just one more thing to add to my pile of Bad ig djdkdl what can ya do djdkdl#i am going to pull myself together and stop crying and go play stardew maybe idk fjdkdl i feel like im starting to crack a little bit#augh. augh. i would love to catch a break djdkdl#dandy.cmd#vent //
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COTL doodle dump under the cut...2!!
Was trying to figure out Lamb's design (pre and post death) in my style. This was the result before I settled on a more cartoonish style for the characters
Hnngh,,eyes :]
Battle Felines AU because of course I had to
Some weird humanisation AU I made based on my...Sims 4 playthrough
Don't question it too much (yes Lamb is a monsterfucker)
#cotl#cult of the lamb#gore tw#narinder#cotl narinder#lambert#Not gonna tag heket or leshy because they're just simple design doodles concepts#As for the sims 4 inspired au#Because I still love love it even though I'm not in the fandom that much anymore#Basically humans worship these 5 deities that are the bishops in the game. Narinder started rebelling so they decided to cut his rebellion#Short by trying to imprison him. This turned into a bloody fight and Narinder actually managed to escape into the human realm. Now he has#to pretend to be and live as a human and ends up having this weirdo neighbour who's rly into the occult and hellbent on befriending him#Feel free to ask about it if ya wanna know more I could go on about this au for hours :]
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i logged onto desktop tumblr for the first time in years just to fully expose my music taste and show u what i listen to on a daily basis hehe
#this took a thousand attempts to post bc desktop tumblr is impossible to use apparently#anyway hi i rly like corey's cover of the killing moon idk it's got such a nice feeling to it#and i listen to the virus of life every night before bed teehee#i have NO recollection of listening to tank that many times?? i do like it though. fun song#ya girl rly said ''im gonna make listening to slipknot & stone sour & corey taylor my entire personality'' and ran with it SJDFHFS
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#kinda have been thinking of going back to school for funeral directing and embalming#i have my makeup artistry degree so i could do mortuary cosmetology butttt its rly had to find a place looking for only that#since funeral directors are also qualified to do mortuary makeup and most places will just have them do it#like it’s not impossible to find a place looking for only a mortuary cosmetologist its just way harder n i’d have way better chance if i#went to school for funeral directing and did the whole process ya know#idk#i just hate that the only places offering the program in canada are sudbury and toronto in ontario or some place in bc too#if i do it in bc though my license wouldn’t be valid in ontario and vise versa#jas rants
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my coworkers are having a laugh together or smtn like TELL ME THATS THE CASE bc why TWO of them start trying to flirt w me yesterday 😭😭
#like omg i get it…. ur conspiring together this js. a prank#pls#im literally the driest person ever idk how u could see me almost every day for months and then think ya i want that 😍#im telling u looks do not even carry i am uggo too like if u both are fr WHAT r u seeing exactly#‘u looked rly cute today’ girl u are lying to my fsce bc i was in jeans i havent washed in 2 weeks and a cat tshirt#i realize i didnt even text him back for that and i think hes also on shift today URGEHRHH 😭😭😭#let me just maybe. not take painkiller today#chug large coffee while im at it#then cry my waawaawa can i go home early tengo colicos 🥺🙏 before he shows up LOL…… uwhrghh…#even tho i have pulled that like twice already this month OOPS!!!!#it has been true though + i prob need to see a doctor or smtn 😞#but in the past these kind of situations have resolved themself#which means that soon circumstances will align for me and i will be out of there 🙏🙏🙏#(sounds of a delusional person coping)
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Glory my bestie Glory
#keese draws#eternal gales#oc posting#oc#ocs#oc art#man it been Forever since I’ve last drawn her which is a shame she’s rly fun to draw#actually. idk if I’ve ever posted any art of her before? I’ve vaguely talked abt her but idk#but ya she’s one of the historical figures from my semi prequel story#I say semi cause it doesn’t rly directly relate to the main story of eternal gales just worldbuilding shit#but ya I love glory sm she’s just hanging out#she lives out in the marshes that surround the main cities#shes a chemist that has done a lot of work for underground medical communities#she also loves to study the wildlife of the marshes and even has tamed a few#it’s actually because of this that she’s still alive tbh#the animals themselves aren’t even That dangerous but since most living staliens in this society have never seen other animals in their#lives they are all incredibly unwilling to take the risk to take out someone who only lives on the edge of society anyways#she has done a Lot of rebel work in her time even before she got into medicine#for example she did a lot to contribute to the big movement towards individuality at the time#one big thing she did at the time though that was especially controversial was chose her own pronouns#an act that was only made more controversial by her choosing one that suggests power and high status#this combined with her long mane and low status as a food packager made her a big target of harassment even within activist communities#this is in fact why she moved out so far in the first place#she finds animals to be much better company in general and can’t deny being bitter towards the hypocrisy of some of her peers#but despite this she still wants society to move in a better direction so as she learns more and more she continues to share said knowledge#that’s what brought beetle and bugs to her door in the first place
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he’s annoying, i don’t like him (he hasn’t given me as much attention lately)
#im fighting for my life out here#i feel so childish and annoying. like rationally ik i can’t have his undivided attention. but that doesn’t mean i don’t want it sometimes🥺#i think what actually is happening is that im worrying he’s about to ghost#i feel bad thinking that though. bc he seems like a very honest and mature person? with how he talks abt things i don’t think he would rly#ghost me after talking for this amount of time. but ya never can tell…. every time we don’t talk as much for a few days i get very nervous#and it’s weirdly quite difficult to push that worry out of my head. and then i get annoyed with myself for worrying about it to begin with#like i can’t control what he does so why worry about his hypothetical actions? i’ll deal w the consequences of them if or when they occur.#if we stop talking i’ll feel sad and i’ll miss him for a bit and then i’ll get over it. that’s all. it’s not that bad.#but anyway my point is we good#sometimes idk if id truly feel That sad. i think it depends how it ends.#or maybe i just don’t think anyone can hurt my feelings as much as the first person to hurt my feelings in a specific way#like you experience a loss or betrayal or grief - whatever - the first time and it’s all encompassing. it feels like it could genuinely kill#you it hurts so bad. and every subsequent loss or betrayal or grief you experience just isn’t the same? you barely flinch#maybe it’s because you learn to process those emotions better or maybe it’s keeping things at arm’s length as a protective measure#that means nothing hurts as much as the first thing#idk#this became a silly ramble#im just very attached to him and i miss him when he’s busy but also don’t want to ask too much for fear of being a nuisance or rejected :)#ykwim?#i miss him a lot
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Today was so fucking awful for several reasons and by this point I'm too tired to go into it all
Just stressful. Really stressful. I ended up clocking out 20 mins late.
Not in as horrible a mood as yesterday. Mostly I just feel very tired and very sorry for myself.
#speculation nation#negative/#like i drank last night bc Ya Kno#i dont rly want to tonight. my body fucking hurts. i just wanna go home and sleep.#i have to figure out dinner though. ughhhhhhh
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messing around a bit
#delete later#man i havent rly drawn for myself in a while it feels weird#trying to play around w my style lately but i dont think its getting anywhere whwhkjsdghjdg#shoutout to yuzuru if nobody's got me after burning out all of my creative juices ik hes got me#should probably go to sleep early tonight got assigned another project to work on through next week at my internship 😔#still going through a very mixed feelings stage regarding on how i see my art but ill live i guess#just. nothing is good enough. im never gonna be satisfied. i think this looks fine. this is the worst thing ive ever seen and made.#im gonna fall behind. it isnt a race. everyones already far ahead. maybe this is okay. why are you satisfied with this much its not enough.#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa being an artist am i right ! agony#well i guess lately its not that i just havent been drawing things for me but more like i cant for some reason. burnouts an asshole#even though i really really did want to make things it honestly sucked ass not being able to i rly dont know what id do if i cant draw#actually took some time for myself yesterday and walked around town a bit it was nice. pierced my ears again and treated myself#but as consequence of course i am now broke </3 unfortunate#hmmmmm idk what im saying kdjsjgdhhskgjdhsdg hope things r going well for everyone else if you're even reading this! may u have a good week#man i wish i just knew if things are gonna be okay#hngggg baru aja tiga bulan masuk balik sekolah sama udah secapek ini wkwkwkwkkwkwk payah gk sih gw ini#masih setahun lebih sampe lulus juga head in hands kenapa gk bisa tidur buat seminggu aja aaagh#ya yang penting juga gw masih hidup sih gk mau kemana-mana kyk gini#aaaaaaaaa gk mau masuk studio besokkkk mau tidurrrr#me when i have to do my job at work#i wonder what i should make for lunch and dinner tomorrow. knowing me though ill end up falling asleep as soon as i get out of the shower#sorry this is. all over the place props if you're even reading this far LOL apologies you have to see me rant a bit
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2022 reads // twitter thread
The Orphancorp Trilogy
fast paced Australian YA about a girl trying to survive in the orphanage > soulless capitalism workers > prison pipeline
lack of human rights in a brutal capitalist dystopian future
sapphic
#The Orphancorp Trilogy#welcome to orphancorp#aroaessidhe 2022 reads#been meaning to read this for ages#it is so australian#me reading this like god this is so refreshing. american ya is so like…puritan. even the ones that aren’t have to be so weirdly delicate and#careful about stuff dfghfdl#(like not rly about sex stuff tho there's discussion of sex more like. talking about taking a piss all the time)#(american books just aren't like that in a normal kind of way)#it’s funny which is a contrast to the like. absolutely horrifying shit that they’re going through#(no SA though (other than mentions) which is good)#there’s a character who i’m pretty sure was called tane and is māori and it was pronounced in the audio like..tain…uhhh…#it is Very fast paced like it's a trilogy but the whole thing was 10 hours audiobook#yeah overall i enjoyed it
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ALSO daj complimented my hair andnsaid it was very thick and looked nide and jm like :]]
#great day in connorland :] im sad daj wont be here tmrw tho#n maya wont start until the monday after next i think.. famously its looking like im gonna be training her which GETS SCARES!#shes dajs friend tho and daj says shes rly nice and also i like halfway trained daj and she said i did a rly good job and was very helpful#so 🙏#also maya is like around dajs age i think(daj is 24) so itll be nice to have another young person... formerly it was just me and nicha and#fiona but me and fiona never rly interact since she leaves so early were just never in thesame area.. she seems super nice though :]#i was worried she didnt like me at first but i think that was just me bejng paranoid bc im down with her now...#but ya. much love to brenda and nee and dee and marian however its hard to be friends eith ppl so much olfer than me... theyre all older#than 40 and obviously that doesnt mean im gonna like. not be friends with them NDFBF we talk we joke etc yk. but theyre literally all old l#enough 2 be my mom like literally my mom turns 40 next year so we just dont have a lot 2 tlk abt...#idk why i did so many disclaimers. basically its like for some reason rly rare for young ppl to do housekeeping i think they all just are#servers. SO itll be cool 2 have a new young person esp one who i already know is chill bc shes friends with daj and daj says ill like her#and alsl we will kind of have to get along sonce were bith friends with daj JFBFJFNGN#so yayyy basically :] im scared 2 train but still excited
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I'll be honest, the children's tv and earbuds and tshirt and generally just relaxing in 🌸🌺🌻 felt... Really, really good. I'm sure hope it won't have any long term effects on my psyche from how calming it was
#beaposting#clair ik rly wants a paci‚ but tbh those earbuds like that pacify me just as well. he's#he'd* also wear them at all times‚ esp when when going through it (though he listened to The YA Fantasy audiobook series which i refuse)#but the result is still having them in makes me feel safe.
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