#YES this is an incredibly niche post. no i do not care

[deadsetobsessions]

Sea Cryptic! Danny AU- Pt.4

[Pt.1] [Pt.2] [Pt.3] [Pt.5] [Pt.6] [Pt.7] [Pt.8] [Pt.9] [Pt.10]

Danny was sitting in the back, his backpack obnoxiously taking up the seat next to him, when the door to the lecture hall creaked open near silently.

“What are you in here for?” Danny asked the guy who crept into class. He sympathetically took his backpack off the Seat of Shame and allowed the guy to sit down. Funnily enough, they had the same hair and eye color.

“Gen Ed. Undecided. You?” The guy grunted quietly back.

“Environmental studies. I’m Danny.”

“Tim.”

With the implicit understanding of two people in a required class they could not give less than two fucks about, Tim and Danny tuned back into the lecture. When the class was assigned group work, Danny looked over to see Tim softly snoring, head slammed down on the table.

“Tim. Wake up, dude.” Danny poked his shoulder.

“Huh? Class over?”

“Nah, we got group work. Discussion board.”

“Oh shit, thanks for waking me up. Wanna team up?”

Danny shrugged. “Sure. We should aim to post it in the middle so the professor doesn’t read our answers to the class.”

“Yeah, sounds like a good idea. Any idea what we’re talking about?”

“Kind of?”

“Good enough for me.”

——

Tim Drake kept seeing Danny Fenton around on campus.

“Danny! Dude, what are you doing?”

Danny turned, gloved hands full of crumpled trash. “Picking up after the student population, apparently.”

“Didn’t think environmental studies was that serious.”

“Global warming is very serious, you jerk,” Danny smirked at him, crossing the grass to put the trash into the trash can. “Reduce, reuse, oil shouldn’t be spilled in water and all that.”

“Basic stuff,” Tim grinned. Nice, he basically had a friend past Bernard now!

They were friends, right?

“And yet humanity fails to comprehend it. Incredible. Incredibly stupid that is.”

“They get it. Major corporations just don’t care.”

Danny sighed. “True that. You on your way to your next class?” He took off his biodegradable gloves off (nitrile and nylon, baby!) and chucked them into the trash.

“I’ve got free time, actually. Prof cancelled for his daughter’s surgery.”

“Oh, shit, that’s rough! You wanna go downtown and join the strike?”

“A strike? What for?” Even as he asked, Tim hiked his bag higher onto his shoulder, ready to go. They fell into step as the two left campus.

“Apparently, Quillan Pharma was doing some shady shit at their manufacturing plants. I think it’s like killing kids, and pouring toxins into the ground.”

“Oh, shit.”

“Yeah. Oh! Poison Ivy’s gonna be there!”

Tim blinked. He casted a sideways look at Danny. Sure he’s been here long enough to know… but it couldn’t hurt to check. “You know she’s an eco-terrorist, right?”

“Okay, but like… people suck sometimes. And all she’s asking for is like don’t kill the planet. And she doesn’t do that whole mind control thing too much anymore! The Sirens are so cool. Plus, one of my best friends at home might actually kill me if I don’t try to get her autograph. Poison Ivy is like, Sam’s personal hero.”

Tim snickered. “Yeah, okay. Mind if one of my friends join? His name’s Bernard.”

“The more the merrier,” Danny nodded. “Ooo! Hot chocolate. Want some?”

Danny bought three drinks as Tim trailed behind, texting Bernard.

“He said yes.”

“Cool! We should meet up somewhere before the drinks get cold.”

Well, Danny got the autograph. Tim got a new friend, and Bernard got a drink from his crush.

——

“Oh, you’re the glowing dude that Batman always talks about!”

Danny blinked, eyes scanning the wing-like cape and the yellow emblem on the hero’s suit. Danny was indeed glowing, stars and nebulas freckling across neon green skin, and glowing hair the color of a white dwarf star, tinged with the blue from his ice core.

“I… have absolutely no idea who you are,” Danny lied, like a liar. He’s found a surprising niche of entertainment in messing with the local vigilantes and he’ll be damned if he missed this opportunity.

He heard a snicker from the comm lines as Red Robin visibly brushes it off.

“I’m Red Robin. Why are you picking up trash?”

“Picking up after you humans, apparently.”

The both of them blink, feeling a weird sense of déjà vu. A moment of awkward silence passed before they both shook it off.

“Are you here to help? No offense, but the track record for you people is terrible.” Danny strode over and grabbed a bag. He opened it, and shook it at Red Robin’s face. “See? Batarangs, these odd bird looking ones, the R’s. Seriously, pick up after yourselves!”

“Oh, woah, can we have these back?”

Danny yanked the bag back before Red Robin could get close. “Pay me. These were incredibly tedious to pick up. Especially the batarangs. I mean, I even found a whole bunch of old rusted ones in the middle of the bay. What did you do, dump an entire bag in there from the air?”

Red Robin sighed and took out a wad of cash, with tracking fluid all over it. Danny grimaced, smelling the odd scent on the money. “That’s not real cash. It smells off. Are you trying to give me counterfeits because you’re broke?”

Red Robin gaped, oddly offended. “No! They’re real!”

“Doesn’t smell like it. It’s stinkier than the trash. Go get the one with the money, the litterer. Tell him I’ll be back the next full moon. I don’t want to talk to you anymore.” Danny grumbled, disappearing on the spot to watch Red Robin flounder with the stack of cash and the piles of dead bodies on the shore.

“What the fuck even is my life these days?” Red Robin wondered out loud, stuffing the cash back into his pocket. He looked over the plastic wrapped bodies and slumped, sighing.

Oddly enough, Danny felt a sense of sympathy. Well, he’s not getting paid for sympathy. He’s not getting paid at all tonight, actually. Danny flew off, plunging once more into the depths of the significantly cleaner waters, and used his ice to scoop out oil stains.

Danny glanced around and sighed. He had a lot of work to do.

——

“So you’re saying he’s like a werewolf mermaid fae child immortal god thing, right?”

Bruce grunted.

“B, what the hell are you smoking these days? You know drugs are bad, right? Do we need Superman to give you that PSA?” Jason snickered.

Tim, massaging his arms from having to haul an ungodly amount of dead bodies, grunted. He’s so similar to Bruce that it gave the people currently in the cave hives.

“He said full moon. I don’t think we can track him with regular stuff. The bugs kept shorting out.”

“Oh boy,” Dick sighed. “Don’t fall off the spiral cliff, Tim. You’ve got midterms to think about so no stalking the guy.”

“Yet,” Tim shot back, changing out of his suit.

Bruce grunted, setting aside a huge stack of cash.

[httpsserene]

𝐡𝐭𝐭𝐩𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐞'𝐬 𝐟𝟏 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐭𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥

𝐮𝐩𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝 𝟑: 𝐨𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫 𝐩𝐢𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 | 𝐜𝐚𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐱 & 𝐬𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠

📖𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: your boyfriend has to make an appearance at some sponsor event. he's gone ahead and bought you an alluring outfit, but he failed to mention how seductive he looks in the new fitted suit his team got him. you two won't be staying long, but you increase the pace by riling him up, mostly unintentionally. so it's your fault that he makes you ruin his loaned mclaren. 📖𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: 18+ only. explicit. squirting. car sex. semi-public sex. ooc (out-of-character) oscar. overstimulation. mild possessive behavior. mild jealousy. vaginal fingering. vaginal sex. condom usage. the audacity of men. lando norris’ savior complex /jk. author’s overuse of italics and run-on sentences. 📖𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 5k words 📖𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: oscar piastri x fem!black!reader 📖𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: oneshot. 📖𝘀𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸: water • tyla

𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲: what can i say, y'all. back at it with the unhinged thirst. every time i do one of these, they've been getting shorter and shorter. don't be afraid, for #4 (dr/mv) i'll be back on my game, they deserve it. yes gremlin lando appearance. also, i cannot imagine oscar ever acting this way, that's why i put the ooc tag? it's definitely a fun read tho (i think), along with the smut! thank you, loves, for the support on this event!

want to be added to my general taglist? or my f1 kinktober taglist? send me an ask!

thank you to my betas! @biancathecool for helping with my grammer and @barnestatic for her wonderful spoiled brat idea :))))

cross-posted on my ao3, httpsss

if you want to look at what i'm planning for ktober, or catch up on previous uploads here's my f1 kinktober masterlist and my general masterlist for all of my works!

oscar is known for his unfazed, composed and collected demeanor. he’s aware that some people say he has no personality–but, he’s just an introvert at the end of the day. oscar’s a man of few words: that’s what people who aren’t well acquainted with him would say. if you’ve had the pleasure of sticking around oscar long enough for him to become comfortable with you, you’ll learn that oscar has an incredibly complex personality. he’s overly sarcastic, has a niche sense of humor, and can ramble endlessly at you. but, he’s still a fairly calm and quiet individual. which is why the way oscar is about to scream at the top of his lungs in the middle of this mclaren event, would be considered uncharacteristic of him.

he originally invited you to join him tonight thinking that having you by his side would eliminate the social exhaustion he experiences at these types of sponsor events. however, the aussie failed to realize that you may introduce a…different problem, to tonight’s business party. when oscar asked you to join him two weeks ago, he was prepared for all of your objections–you’re both chronic homebodies, and you both hate partaking in small talk with balding, later-aged, cologne-drenched, white men who don’t know when to let a conversation die. he chose the perfect time to ask you (after you emerged from the bathroom post-self-care bath), and addressed all of your grievances. 

oh, you don’t have anything to wear? he already bought you an outfit, had it altered to perfectly fit your measurements, and bought you a pair of heels and a purse to match. oh, you won’t be able to get your hair done in time? he already scheduled an appointment with your usual hairstylist the day before the event, paid all of her fees, and tipped her very nicely. oh, your nails aren’t done?  he booked you a spot at your preferred nail salon for a premium mani-pedi, and has a few nail inspiration photos picked out if you can’t decide. if you need your lashes done or need to get waxed, he can make the call right now; he has them on standby to fit you in.

knowing the amount of phone calls oscar had to partake in to arrange all of this causes you to fold and agree to join him. there’s nothing more the two of you hate than making phone calls–well, besides the pr events.

oscar had chosen an alluring burnt-orange mesh corset and matching ruched ankle-length skirt that looks beautiful against your warm, soft and shining brown skin. your hair is silk-pressed, length reaching your mid-back and your edges are laid in a minimal manner, matching the simplicity of your makeup look. simple gold rings are spread across a few fingers, ears accessorized with a pair of small good hoops oscar gifted you, and his initials rest in the dip between your clavicles attached to a thin gold chain. objectively, you're considerably modestly dressed, the only skin you're showing is on your arms, shoulders, a smidge of your decolletage, and the tops of your feet in the low-heeled strappy sandals. 

this is the start of what oscar failed to account for. he didn’t expect the outfit to hug your curves like plastic wrap. the whole night he’s had to forcefully deny himself the opportunity to stare at your ass, but that doesn’t mean the other men at the event have the same courtesy. he’s taken to burning holes with his eyes into anybody who lets their gaze linger over your form for a second too long. on a regular day, oscar is generally unaffected by anyone who appreciates your body (they can look, but the second they try to touch–you let them know exactly how they had you fucked up), but if he catches one more mclaren engineer undressing you with their eyes–he will make zac fire all of them; he’ll plan his own race strategy and do his goddamn pitstop by himself.

oscar also didn’t account for how your timid and sweet attitude would have everyone enamored with you; at first, watching everyone eagerly attune to your shy words was amusing to him, but it quickly became a nuisance. he was originally leading you around the room, doing his rounds at any important figures’ tables, and everything was fine. and then, oscar had made the obvious mistake of making you laugh–a pleasant stream of giggles spilling from your lips, dimples deepening, and smile widening at whatever small joke he made. he’s always thrilled to see how you throw your head back in amusement, how your hands clap together gleefully, and how your eyes squint in from the force of your laughter. as he shakes himself out of your dazzling trance, he attempts to rejoin the conversation–but every single person at the table remains entranced and wide-eyed at you. 

this would be completely fine, of course, if it was a one-off occasion; but it’s not. 

suddenly, every person oscar tries to thank for supporting mclaren, starts ignoring him and paying more attention to you. he’s literally the pilot of the car that these people are spending an absurd amount of money on, but they can’t even bother to try and pretend to listen to him. men and women alike are finding any excuse to prolong conversations with you, and even lean within your personal space with the excuse that ‘they can’t hear you very well because you’re so soft spoken.’ nobody can invade your personal space, but oscar. he has no choice but to do the very thing he hates–pda. you continue to circle around the room, his hand constantly resting on the small of your back or the dip of your waist. when you’re in the middle of listening to some completely unnecessary story a man is telling you, oscar constantly adjusts your hair, plays with your rings, and smooths down your skirt if he feels like they’re trying too hard. you banish oscar to getting you a glass of water when he begins to interject in conversations in a passive-aggressive manner.

his third strike off the night, might actually be an overall win in his books. when you saw oscar in his new fitted suit, you stared him dead in the eye and told him to ‘get naked and rail you’. it’s this beautiful deep cream color that pairs perfectly with the dark orange tone of your outfit, but the vest underneath the suit jacket highlights his tiny waist so clearly that it makes you want to scream. in between socializing, you overwhelm oscar with compliments, unable to stop telling him how handsome he looks. you surgically attach yourself to his side and hug his arm; taking an occasional squeeze of his bicep, playing with his cufflinks, and tracing the veins on the back of his hand. oscar practically runs to get you a refill of water because he’d be unable to stop himself from getting fully hard if you touched him any longer–the trousers hide nothing.

he can feel your burning gaze from across the room, and turns back to watch you after asking a waiter for water, and catches your eyes roaming the length of his body. in high-definition, he sees your tongue wetting your lips before you bite at your bottom lip–and then, your attention is stolen away from some random man who’s introducing himself to you and the group of ladies you found yourself accosted by as soon as oscar left your side.

and, that’s it for oscar. he thinks he may have heard his last-fucking-button being pressed inside his head, and seethes. he goes to push off from his leaned stance against the counter and makes to start his warpath, but a hand grasps at his shoulder. oscar turns around snappily, biting out an irritated and sarcastic, “can i help you?”

“woah! calm down now, mate. thought you were going to bite my head off for a second,” it’s lando, “if i were anybody else i’m sure there would be an unfortunate tabloid of ‘how oscar piastri is the most rude f1 driver on the grid’” lando jokes teasingly, yet a hint of seriousness leaks into his tone. 

oscar nods, understanding the underlying warning within the brit’s teasing. he apologizes softly to lando, before glancing back over at you, and can infer that you charmingly informed the man that you have a boyfriend—based on the way you point in his direction. oscar watches the polite smile fade from your face as the man continues to bother you, and the murderous look rises to his face again.

“OKAY”, lando claps abruptly, startling not only oscar, but everyone in a 10 foot radius. lando waves everyone else’s eyes away, smiling like he didn’t do anything, and speaks underneath his breath, “go. i’ll cover for you.”

oscar’s mouth drops open, baffled, “what?”

“leave—get your girlfriend and go,” lando says matter-of-factly, his smile becoming genuine, “zac probably won’t like to hear that you looked particularly murderous, and he definitely won’t like hearing that you slaughtered our sponsors, and that i let it happen.”

oscar snorts before he thanks lando sincerely, and the brit dismisses him, “i’m just looking out for my rookie teammate as the senior driver for our team. i can’t let your horny teenage mindset become common knowledge to our esteemed guests.”

“first of all,” oscar says dryly, his grateful mood dissipating at the mocking, “i didn’t even know you knew the word ‘esteemed' existed,” lando scoffs, “and secondly, you are literally only two years older than me.”

lando looks at oscar with a blank stare and deadpans, “do you want to leave or not?”

oscar daps up his teammate in farewell, and makes his way over to you as quickly as he can without seeming desperate, your glass of water left behind on the counter. your back is facing him as he approaches and you're still unwillingly participating in conversation with the man who can’t take no for an answer. as he gets closer, he can piece together the conversation; the dude doesn’t believe you have a boyfriend and you must be lying to him, and you’re adamant that your boyfriend is very real.

“look, bro. even if i was lying about having a boyfriend, why would i give you my number now? like, i’m just supposed to forget how you’ve been harassing me—“

oscar rests his hand on your side, and when you turn your head to see who’s touching you, he leans down and kisses you. it’s a kiss deep enough to let everyone know who you’re leaving with tonight, but not deep enough to be salacious (he can hear lando’s cackle from the other side of the room).

you melt into his kiss before he pulls away, leaving you dazed and disoriented, stumbling into him. oscar drapes his left arm around your shoulder, guiding you to tuck into his side, while he offers his right hand to the offending man for a handshake. “it seems i haven’t had the pleasure of meeting you yet. i’m oscar, i drive for mclaren,” he introduces himself, sounding overly pleased.

the man angers, ignoring oscar’s extended hand and cockily states, “you should already know who i am. my family nicely lent you the mclaren you drove here tonight!”

“ah,” oscar smiles viciously, “if ‘your family’ kindly lent me the car, that would explain why i only remember your father’s name–and not his arrogant, disrespectful, and narcissistic trust-fund son’s name.”

the man stomps his foot in rage, like a spoiled brat, and questions, “who do you think you’re talking too?!”

oscar smirks, “nobody important, apparently,” (one of the ladies listening whispers a quiet ‘damn, that’s crazy’), oscar continues, “don’t worry, mate–i’ll make sure your father’s car returns home to him safely. should i bill you for any cleaning, in case i make a mess of it?”

the guy stumbles over a response before he scoffs and stomps away. oscar shrugs uncaring, before addressing the group of ladies who were cliqued to the side watching the whole interaction, “well. if you all don’t mind, i’m just going to steal her away from you ladies, if that’s okay?” (like there’s an option). the ladies fawn over oscar’s protectiveness before they let the two of you go, and then he starts herding you towards the exit.

it’s torture. in every five steps the two of you take, you're interrupted by various guests trying to catch you one last time. oscar feels like they’re all intentionally aggravating him; patting you on the arm, commenting on how eye-catching you look, and using the fact that the two of you are leaving to press a kiss to your hand in goodbye. you two burst out of the main doors and sigh in relief, for different reasons–for you, it’s because oscar didn’t give one of his sponsors brain damage, and for oscar, it’s because he’s one step closer to getting you in his bed.

you grasp at oscar’s hand, and he starts to lead you down the steps towards the valet, and as you fall into step at his side, you speak softly under your breath, “i can understand why you kissed me like that inside because the dude was being an asshole–even though you were marking your territory like some kind of dog–but, please; don’t tear this poor man’s throat out for helping me into the car.”

the australian remains quiet, properly chastised and works on releasing the pent up effect of the annoyances from inside the venue. everything is going well; the valet asks oscar for his parking ticket, and he goes to grab the keys, but stops just before he makes to start heading to the car, and turns back to you two and says, “i don’t know if i told you when you walked in but–you look incredibly beautiful tonight, miss. you could be a model, seriously. like, you should feel so lucky to have a woman like her–”

all attempts of oscar finding his peace are thrown out of the window. he interrupts the dude’s rambling, and bites out, “hey man, y’know what. i can just take the keys to the car. we can walk to it.”

the valet stutters, confused, “a-are you sure, i mean it’s like pretty far in the back. i can run and get it no pro–”

“it’s FINE! i mean, it’s cool, we can use the extra steps, y’know. enjoy the breeze and everything,” oscar says, slightly maniacal. there’s no breeze, it’s warm. the valet’s and your eyes meet for a second and a shared thought of “he’s trippin” is passed telepathically.

the valet concedes, not wanting to upset the f1 driver any farther and tosses him the keys. as the two of you are passing by, oscar hands the man a bill that’s probably too big based on the man’s astonished gasp. you call out to the man, continuing to walk further in the lot, “sorry about him! he just gets a little touchy about strangers driving his car, y’know?” oscar grumbles lowly next to you, and you smack him on the arm, “what did you want me to say? ‘oh sorry, my boyfriend just wants to fuck me really badly to soothe his needless jealousy?’”

“as long as he knows who’s the one who gets to take you home and fuck you.”

“oscar!” you squeak, “we both know we’d die of embarrassment if you said that. i can’t even imagine those words coming out of your mouth, in that order.”

you guys eventually puzzle out where the car is after several remote beeps of the car’s horn, and find that it’s literally tucked away in the last row, far corner with no surrounding cars for two rows.

oscar doesn’t open your door like he usually does, and leads you around to the driver's side. he opens the door, pushes the seat back as far as it goes, and sits down. without saying anything, he loosens his tie and goes to unbuckle his belt before you reach down and grab at his hand, bewildered, “oscar jack! what the fuck are you doing?”

he blinks, “i’m fucking you, right now. it’s too long of a drive back—i’m going to crash the car if you keep sitting next to me in that goddamn outfit. i was going to take you to the bathroom inside, but i figured you’d at least prefer the car. you can be a little louder here.”

your mouth dries, “you said they loaned you an incredibly rare, vintage mclaren, babe. i’m not gonna-“

oscar wrestles his way out of his suit jacket, spreads it underneath him on the leather seat, and pats his lap. “problem solved.”

shifting your weight, you glance around nervously. oscar is right, you would prefer the car over the bathroom. all those people inside who could overhear, gossip, and spread the news of how rookie mclaren, f1 driver, oscar piastri, had you yelling his name in the middle of an event. you’d pass.

“oh, c’mon now, babe. you didn’t think i saw the way you were eating me alive with your eyes inside,” your boyfriend teases, “i know you‘ve at least gotten a little wet for me already, haven’t you?”

that’s all it takes; the australian acting possessive and feening to get inside you is more than enough to have you straddling his lap and pulling the car door shut with a slam.

oscar tugs you into dirty make out, and you get lost in his pink lips, tugging teeth, and explorative tongue. the last of your breath tapers out in a reedy moan, and you break the kiss to pant against his lips, and oscar laughs. his laughter spreads through your chest, and it has your hips rolling against the bulge you feel underneath you. his amusement is cut off, and his hands fly to grip at your hips. he starts tugging you against him in a filthy grind, and choked off moans from the two of you start to fill the car.

you press kisses to oscar’s jaw line, paving a path down to his wide strong neck with your tongue. you suck on small patches of skin, not using enough suction to leave a mark, but enough for oscar to become aware of the fantasization that you could. the aussie gasps at every random suckle of your lips as he scrambles to pull the skirt up your legs. you shift your hips up to make it easier for him, as your hands feel down his torso to his belt. it unbuckles fairly easily, and you shove it out of the way, to unzip the slacks and pull his cock out.

oscar moans, throwing his head back at the feel of your hand on his length, and you get entranced in the trap that his pale thick neck is, again. you hum against his neck, introducing teeth alongside the ache of the suction of your mouth, and bully the collar of his shirt out of the way to find a space to leave a few marks. oscar’s breath freezes at the first hickey he feels you leave, but the rapid inhale he takes next clears his mind enough to have his right hand pull your panties to the side, and move to caress your heat.

you shudder on top of him, your breathy sigh amplified within the car. oscar sinks two fingers inside of you, and a much louder moan is tugged out. your hands fly up to grasp onto his shoulder, and your head tilts backward away from his neck in pleasure. his fingers thrust into you gently for a few beats slowly working to open you up for him and once he feels your cunt starting to relax, his thumb reaches to press at your clit. whines fill the air, as you lean all the way back, resting your back on the steering wheel allowing oscar all the space he needs to stretch you out. his fingers start curling as they drag out of you, and you can feel the pads of his fingers rubbing over a soft spot on the front of your walls. 

oscar’s eyes were stuck marveling over the overwhelmed expression on your face, but once he starts feeling wetness dripping down his arm he glances down, and curses out a rough, “fuck, baby—you’re dripping all over me.” your cheeks burn hot, and you can’t tell if that’s out of humiliation or the effect of his awe-filled voice. your right hand releases his shoulder, and bats at his arm, before tugging at his wrist to pull his fingers out, “that’s enough, mmm, just get in me already.”

oscar eagerly draws away; he uses his clean hand to tug his wallet out of his back pocket, and tugs a condom out with a smidge of struggle before handing it to you. you snatch it out of his hand, biting it open and rolling it over his cock, and once it’s on, you tease, “jeez, osc. you really were planning on jumping me in the middle of the event tonight—grabbing a condom and everything; you think i’m that easy?”

he chuckles, satisfied, his hand drenched in your wetness rubbing over his cock to get him slick, and teases back, “you’re about to ride my cock in the parking lot of said event, pretending to be worried about ruining the seats of this vintage car. i’m not calling you easy, but it doesn’t hurt to be prepared, does it?”

your cheeks are definitely burning from humiliation this time around, but you huff, ignoring him checking you. you tug his hand away, raising your hips, and guide him to your entrance with your own hand, before slowly sinking down. 

twin sets of moans fill the air as he bottoms out; one of his hands reaches to palm at your ass (it’s sticky, so it must be the one he fingered you with), and the other grips at your waist tightly. you squirm on top of him, knees barely managing to find enough room to prop on the seat to give you a stable base. once you feel stable in your cramped position, you give a testing grind of your hips, and from there, it’s lights out.

oscar lets you set the pace for a few thrusts, suffering in the languid rock of your hips; you’re torturously tight around him, and he can only groan at the feeling of you wrapped around him. his chest heaves, before he brings both hands to halt your hips, and starts fucking up into you rough and quick. a scream jostles out of your throat at the unexpected change of speed, but you just take it with no complaints, allowing yourself to go limp against the wheel of the car to hold your body upright. he moves your body for you, pulling you downwards to meet his upward thrusts; and you feel him constantly applying pressure against that one tender spot right under your navel.

your boyfriend revels in the sound of the moans he’s punching out of your throat, admiring the way your head is thrown back—mouth open wide, eyes scrunched tight, lips bruised and bitten to hell. it’s a lewd picture, painted by himself. the car rocks along to his frantic rhythm, windows fogging, and sweat begins to form on both of your skin. the aussie’s core tightens; he won’t last much longer, you’ve had him half-hard the whole night.

a frustrated grunt escapes oscar, and you hum questionably about to ask what’s wrong–but his right hand leaves your waist to furiously start circling your clit, and an ear piercing shriek leaves you. “c’mon now, babe. ah-be good and come f’me yeah? im so close, baby–please,” he babbles, the last shred of sanity leaving him. his hips don’t falter once–to you it feels like they’re moving quicker, every sensitive spot receiving attention from the sharp snaps of them.

you cry out, it’s all too much; your hand reaches down to press against his navel in a feeble attempt to stop him from stroking so deep and roughly, and incoherent pleads try and tumble out of your mouth, “mm! osc–no! ah–too much, baby! it’s too much–hngh–feels weird–s-slow down!” it’s like his ears are filled with cotton; he can hear you begging down at him but can’t make out what your saying over the blood rushing in his ears. he’s trapped staring at your pretty cunt, watching the obscene amount of wetness coming out of you–the suit jacket underneath him is completely ruined, and he off-handedly thinks it won’t be saving the leather upholstery.

your legs start quivering and trembling–it damn near looks like you're freezing to death, even though the car has become as humid as a sauna. your own orgasm shocks you, and your eyes roll back erotically–unable to give oscar any warning. and in your last moment of awareness, you realize that something feels different, but it’s too late.

you choke on your scream of, “oscar, fuck!” as fluid gushes out of your cunt, and the first wave is enough to completely drench oscar’s pants, and oscar finally returns to the moment in amazement. he eagerly brushes his hand against your clit, and shortens his strokes to quick little jabs to force more of your juices out, and you can only ride along. you try to slam your legs shut, to jostle oscar’s hand away, but it’s futile with his torso propping you open for him. you’re sobbing messily, as he forces more liquid to spray from your cunt–and he moans out his own orgasm, ripped from him in surprise. the australian halts his stimulation this time around when you frantically tug his wrist away when the pleasure melds to pain, and allows himself to get a few more jerks of his hips in.

you fall forward, collapsing into his chest–the squelch of your thighs meeting his pant-covered ones has him humming and grinding his hips into you as gently as he can. the two of you shake against each other, hearts rabbiting as you catch your breath. oscar’s hands rise to rub at your back, bringing you down from the aftershocks still trembling over your body. 

“i-i’ve never squirted before,” you whisper into his neck.

your boyfriend hums softly, “did you like it?”

he feels you nod against him shyly.

“then, it’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” he comforts, knowing if he seems approving of it, you’ll be quicker to accept it as something good, “how i’m going to explain the ruined suit and car seat to mclaren on the other hand…”

a shaky laugh from you causes oscar to smile, “i told you you shouldn’t fuck me in the car.”

“how was i supposed to know that tonight would be the night i’d made you gush all over me?! i was hoping that when the time came we’d at least be on a couch,” he whines.

“shut the fuck up,” you joke, “i want a live play by play when you explain the cleaning bill to zac.”

the aussie pauses, faking thoughtfulness, “maybe i should send the bill to the trust-fund baby. zac would back me up–he’s american, he’d probably find it hilarious.”

oscar gently shifts you over to the passenger seat, and you tug your skirt all the way down, and he fights his way out of his slacks that stuck to his thighs with your wetness. he manages to wrangle them off and kicks them to the side of the car floor along with the soiled suit jacket, after fishing the keys out of them, sitting out in his boxers, and glances over to see you adjusting your appearance as best as you possibly can.

“you want a mcflurry?” the aussie offers.

“as long as we can get a fry with it,” you smile at the random shift in conversation, allowing him to hide his embarrassment.

oscar turns the keys in the ignition, and the engine rolls into life with a deep, vibrating hum. he catches your legs pressing together tightly, and you squirm at the purr of the engine under your seat.

“well,” oscar starts nonchalantly as he reverses out of the spot, “you have the time that it takes to get from the drive-through to the flat to finish eating–because as soon as we get home, i’m taking you to bed and learning how to make you squirt, consistently. i don’t care how long it takes, or how many orgasms you have–i’ll keep going ‘til you come dry, babe.”

taglist: @lorarri @soph1644 @jaydensluv @fanboyluvr @nissaimmortal @redgonerogue @hollie911 @saintwrld @buendiabebeta @butterfly-lover @lana-d3l-rey @dylan1721 @spicybagel14 @dhhdhsiavdhajj @miahgonzalez16 @jjaekin @dkbj14 @f1lover55 @f1lov3r @mindless-rock @biancathecool @barnestatic @sweetpiccolo-blog @my-ylenia @zaynzierulez @reblog-princess

© httpsserene 2023

[batsplat]

about 2007 motegi, i’ve really thought a lot… when valentino congratulated casey on his title, he specifically mentioned his championship t-shirt. from my observation there wasn’t anything particularly special about it, it might just be valentino’s joke

but casey really cared about valentino’s actions… he not only wanted valentino’s verbal congratulations but also asked just like why didn’t you come shake my hand!!! i should get the same treatment as nicky!!!😠

(vaguely following on from this and this post) oh I remember the shirt, it's actually one of my favourite bits of niche valentino/casey lore!! valentino isn't JUST being a facetious dickhead here, his name is literally on casey's 2007 championship shirt as one of casey's heroes:

isn't this crazy?? I've never been able to find a great source for the actual list of names, so god knows how exclusive this club was... apparently casey also had the names of his ducati crew on there, which is a nice touch tbh. but he had valentino's name on that shirt!! given how by this point he was already mad at valentino for switching up towards him, it's such a funny choice to make. literally nobody would have questioned his exclusion! you're competing against the guy! idk, I love it when casey does something just a little unexpected like that, really makes you want to poke at the guy to figure out what his deal is. and pleasingly, we do also have an actual clip of valentino commenting on the shirt:

Yes, like I say before, it's a great pleasure that one of my fans wins the world championship - so I think half is also mine!

look at his smirk. insufferable. just a fantastic dynamic they've got going on, isn't it

but I did NOT know about casey complaining about not getting a cooldown lap handshake. and. lol?? casey?? come on. some dignity, please. I can't believe they actually got valentino to respond to that. reminds me of a similar-ish 'controversy' from 2010 about how jorge was accused of deliberately ignoring future teammate ben spies coming to congratulate him on the cooldown lap, as like... a form of sophisticated mind games ig. at least there it wasn't actually spies complaining. you can tell that even casey upon reflection probably decided this wasn't a legitimate grievance by how he's not brought it up again since... valentino did have a pretty nightmarish motegi race for annoying tyre-related reasons, so was understandably not in a great mood, and he was not in fact the defending champion... so like. I checked the footage and reckon valentino probably could have worked a little harder to get over to casey, but also this is obviously an extremely petty thing to complain about

and while we're talking petty, the ghostwriter of casey's autobiography thinks that casey was also pissed at valentino at the next race in phillip island for *checks notes* having a special helmet design at casey's home race? incredible scenes

literally started off the infamous phillip island streak with a spite win. your regular reminder that casey says in his autobiography that he doesn't use his rivals to motivate himself

and motegi 2007 is ofc also the table football race. a flyover stretch with fascinating interpersonal vibes, truly

so late 2007 is when casey really starts going in on how valentino had cooled off towards him AND talking about not liking valentino's tone in the press, that valentino wasn't as complimentary of him as he'd been at the start of the season... which might be true, but casey wasn't exactly a shrinking violet either when answering questions about valentino. as an example, this is how he's talking about valentino in july of 2007:

"This rule is not good and we need more tyres," Rossi said earlier in the week, "The problem is for the show because, at the end, it is the tyre that decides the race." "At the beginning of the season, Valentino and the others were all for the new tyre rules," Stoner points out, "but, as soon as they don't win, the rule is crap. I've had my bad races this year, especially in Germany, and I'm not complaining about the tyre rule. "They can moan and whinge about it as much as they want, but it shows that [Michelin] has had such an advantage in the past. This season, they cannot bring a tyre in just for the race [and] it's a matter of relying on the company that supports you to do a good job."

"moan and whinge" steady on casey

valentino over the years has talked about this rivalry far less than casey has... which includes not being all that interested in diagnosing when things soured interpersonally between the two of them - beyond saying a couple times in 2010-12 during the pettiest phase of the feud that casey hadn't gotten over laguna. mostly this isn't that big a problem because valentino's side of the rivalry is so much more straightforward, but it's still obviously not ideal. it's that relative scarcity which makes the following interview answer from 2009 one of my other favourite tidbits:

"He bases his sentences on the results. Even at the beginning of 2007 he was giving me a lot of compliments, then, after winning the World Championship, he started with heavy criticism."

isn't it lovely that casey thinks valentino switched up his tone towards him because casey started winning, and valentino thinks casey switched up his tone towards valentino because casey started winning... just nicely mirror each other, don't they. such good foils

so taking all these pieces of evidence together... you get a really nice sense of how casey by end of 2007 was all over the place wrt valentino. he misses valentino being as friendly to him as in years past!! he liked valentino congratulating him by rubbing his head in qatar 2007 :) enough to mention that parc fermé interaction THREE TIMES in his autobiography!! doesn't appreciate not getting his hand held after sealing the title :( is increasingly surly that whole year about how nobody is giving him enough credit for his successes :/ is building on a reputation already established in 2006 for being rather an outspoken character when it comes to complaining about everyone in complaining range... but also has an issue with valentino being rude about him in the press :| but still puts valentino on his championship shirt on his list of heroes <3 like... buddy. what is going on here

part of what's going on ofc is that casey takes offence incredibly easily and valentino can be a pretty offensive character. now, again, I really don't think valentino was doing that much in 2007, but obviously my standard for 'valentino being reasonably respectful to rivals' is probably rather different to 2007!casey's standards. it's the malice casey reads into valentino's actions that I reckon is mostly misplaced... like yeah sure valentino distances himself from championship rivals, but. y'know. that's pretty normal behaviour. the fun thing about 2007 is that knowing valentino's entire feud history, you're sort of primed to read it as valentino being the aggressor... but if anything, casey is generally openly ruder towards valentino than vice versa. now obviously, valentino at this stage is a lot better at the subtler, under the radar nastiness that must be infuriating to be subjected to... but y'know, at the end of the day valentino still isn't openly attacking casey. and when discussing this rivalry, it's crucial to acknowledge what an extremely prickly character casey is - that's what makes it so enjoyable!! even better, he's an extremely prickly character who is very ready to make enemies but is ALSO kind of weird about valentino rossi specifically

and yes, having a valentino rossi complex is basically part of the job description if you're a motogp rider of a certain age. still, always important to acknowledge that all of valentino's feuds with younger riders involved guys who were already A Bit Weird about valentino going into the rivalry, which inevitably affected how those respective rivalries ended up laying out. what's so fun about it is that all three of them express it in completely different ways - from jorge's somewhat deranged level of dedication to analysing valentino's every breath, to marc's overenthusiastic commitment towards imitating valentino and beating him and also throwing himself at him at every opportunity, to casey's rather more repressed approach where he's simultaneously extremely sensitive to any possible offence on valentino's part while also kind of wishing they could be friends...? or something? I don't even know what casey's after! doesn't help that he's subsequently retconned this period where he like... kinda looked up to valentino, sure, and respected him and all that - but certainly no mention of putting valentino on championship celebration shirts. so we still have quite a limited amount of evidence at our disposal, but I would gently suggest that casey's cool, composed 'didn't even care who I was beating' rhetoric doesn't quite match up to reality. and casey thinks that valentino got more critical of casey because he was losing and valentino thinks casey got more critical of valentino because he was winning... and the thing is, they're both going to be somewhat right!! attacking rivals from a position of strength is actually kinda part of both of their preferred MO's - it's a similarity between them that plays into how casey at times gets to play the valentino role in this rivalry. so yeah, casey will have almost certainly gotten even mouthier once he could get away with it. but equally, even though valentino wasn't escalating hostilities by his standards, even just his natural process of distancing himself a little from his direct title rivals and getting a tad snarky about them in the press wasn't exactly being well received by casey. and thus they can both say with some justification that the other rider was a lot friendlier towards them at start of the year, and both will have reacted to this in a way that helped further gradually ramp up the level of hostility. lovely stuff

still, you do have to come back to how imbalanced this rivalry was wrt how emotionally invested the pair of them were. having a firm grasp of their dynamic in 2007 is key to understanding how the whole thing subsequently played out, in part casey was less guarded and just a little more likely to let a few things slip... valentino wants to beat this challenging new rival, but I reckon he's mostly being sincere in that his main frustration in 2007 is feeling like he's not even able to fight casey at all for bike/tyre reasons. it's a rivalry he generally enjoyed when they were actually going at it! a comfort zone rivalry that really isn't all that emotionally messy from his side. even if he'll maybe still imply casey's compliments of him were never sincere, seeing how they dried up over the course of 2007... or perhaps joke about casey putting his name on his championship winning shirt, how at least he's losing to a fan... something fun about how valentino is always aware of that idolisation dynamic and is capable of playing with it, just a little. even with casey

whereas for casey, this isn't a game. casey really enjoyed valentino being nice to him and is ever so sensitive towards valentino pulling back. casey thinks valentino isn't giving him the credit he is owed and escalates his rhetoric in response. casey puts valentino's name on his championship winning shirt and then complains valentino didn't hold his hand. poor casey... it'd all be easier if he just didn't care, but that's the one thing he could never quite manage

[sweet-as-an-angel]

So Dominic does reveal more when it's safe to do so? OKAY, okay, but what if it takes a lot of time for his beloved to come to trust him? What I mean by that is that some people do not care for their loved one's action simply because they favour them. A normally empathetic person could definitely do that. So if it took around... whatever, 3 years let's say, would he be patient enough if he knew it would lead to his object of affection to basically be okay with everything he does(crazy person behaviour, but it's fictional so it's fiNE)? I'm curious. He's willing to do "anything", but that doesn't mean anything his darling would want specifically. It's anything he would do to get to that specific goal. He isn't exactly known to be nice, especially when he views his kids as burdens. So another question that came to mind, if it hasn't been answered already, would be could he change his mind on his kids? If Y/N likes them, and just really likes kids (even more since they're his), would there be some type of affection growing for them if it came from the simple pattern of "The one I like likes this, therefore I like it."?

Sorry for rambling, I can't seem to pinpoint the man, and he always turns out to be even more vicious than the last ask reveals. I really like how you made him out to be, and as depressing (in the sense that he's a cheater, is clearly insensitive, and would fuck his honey's parent just to excite them?? He's disgustingly intimidating) as I find him to be, it feels more realistic. Would love to punch him, 10/10. Plus he's French. And I'm weak. SO TO SUMMARISE, GOOD WORK, THANK YOU THANK YOU UHM (ỌVỌ)

Thank you so much for writing in, my Lovely ! I am eternally grateful for your kindness and your dedication to reading my posts; I can tell you've even read the more niche ones because you know precisely what Dominic's like ^^. To answer your questions:

Yes, Dominic will only reveal his tendencies to a Darling he can trust wholeheartedly. Granted, he will stow away his true self in order to be with you, but being able to let loose and drop his veneer of humanity is...liberating. That being said, he would only do so if he knows, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that his Darling would not only be okay with it, but actively encourage it. He'll settle for the former, though. He knows not to be pushy when Fate hands him a win.

On the topic of whether Dominic would grow to care about his children if you cared for them...Honestly, Dominic is way past the point of forming connections - true, genuine bonds - with anyone that isn't you. And even then, if it's only his superficial charm you're attracted to, Dominic will wear it constantly, if only to make sure you keep loving him. Even at the cost of his real identity. So, to clarify, Dominic won't truly care for his sons. Not in the way that a normal parent would; rather, he views them as highly valuable assets he can use to keep you close to him. And while he may seem to go above and beyond when protecting them, it's only to ensure you don't fall into some kind of stupour if one or both of them ever came to harm.

If they ever did, Dominic would absolutely use the opportunity to convince you to have a child with him. Either through adoption or traditional means, he'll find a way to tether you to him. And no, he won't care about this child, either. Unless it is biologically yours, then he'd feel some sense of responsibility in taking care of it, but only because it is half of you.

Dominic is, for better or worse, an incredibly complex man whose motives stem from something that transcends the very pinnacles of human vicehood, and I'm so glad to hear that you like the way he is characterised, my Darling ^^ !

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[xxscarletxrosexx]

Addressing Watermarks on Official Merch Scans -- A Post Made to EDUCATE

I never thought this would need to be addressed, but I think to ignore this would do me injustice as someone who works in education. This message, at its core, is to educate, not attack anyone in particular.

I used to think how silly it was that people used watermarks on pictures and art, but after spending decades in multiple fandom groups, I learned that people are simply too lazy to find the source and credit accordingly and/or want the glory/validation that comes from claiming that particular art/picture as theirs.

I've had a picture stolen once, too. It was a picture of a mannequin that reminded me of Slender Man. I posted it on a public social media app just for laughs, and somehow, that picture ended up becoming a small meme. It WASN'T a huge meme, but it made its way to a niche of Slender Man memes. I haven't received credit for that picture and probably never will. The reason is that this picture was taken over a decade ago, so finding the source would be difficult for me to scroll through the app. Furthermore, I can't show proof that I have the original picture since it was from an old phone that I no longer owned. I had the picture backed up on an external hard drive, but it was deleted when the memory got wiped when I was dealing with a virus. Ultimately, I'm not here to air out my grievance for this picture, but I take it as a lesson to myself that I should be careful next time if I want to post a picture on the internet.

This now brings me to the present-day issue: why did I watermark my scans?

As you read from my previous experience, it's because people DON'T credit or share the source.

I am very much aware that this particular design of the Forgers is very rare to come by. The official art was posted by the official website, but it was never addressed again (I know because I am dying to have acrylic stands of this design). As of today, I tried to look for this specific design and the following images showed up when I spent the past 10 minutes scrolling:

If you were to click the link for the merch (middle image), you would find that the website is unavailable. So, yes, to find this design on a merch was INCREDIBLY lucky on my part. Now, I wasn't expecting to find this at Waku Waku Park, nor was it my mission to find this specific art during the duration of my trip. It just so happened to be at the shop. To my knowledge, other official SxF merch--other than the Waku Waku Park merch--supposedly changes. I compared my experience with two SxF moots who went in December (Ikebukuro/Tokyo location) and 1 week (Osaka location) before me, and they both don't recall finding this design during their visits to Waku Waku Park (I mean, justified because it's been ages ago). As a result, this makes this merch all the more difficult to find.

Technically, I wasn't allowed to take pictures of the merchandise when I was at the shop. I was approached by a store clerk after I had already completed taking pictures of every merch available at the shop. She was limited in her English but crossed her index fingers and told me: "Pictures prohibited." I have not, nor do I plan to, share merch pictures, hence why I edited to the clear file folders to show proof that I was there.

The reason why I am so hell-bent on having my watermark on MY PICTURES and MY SCANS is because of the amount of time, effort, and money I invested into getting it.

Just to give you guys an idea of how expensive it was:

$1,500 was spent on a 9-day round-trip ticket to Japan.

$180 was lost to an overnight night bus from Tokyo to Osaka that I didn't end up riding due to rushing and booking the wrong date. I was not allowed to cancel or refund.

$100 was spent on an airplane ticket from Tokyo to Osaka.

$90 was spent on a shinkansen (bullet train) from Kyoto to Tokyo (we took a fast metro ride from Osaka to Kyoto).

$100 was spent on a last-minute B&B in Osaka.

$50 was spent on Waku Waku Park tickets that came with merchandise (I paid for my friend's ticket as well as my own).

$12 (est.) was spent on purchasing this clear file folder.

Over $350 was spent on purchasing merch from Waku Waku Park alone.

$60 was invested in purchasing a scanner just to scan a high-quality image of this clear file for my friend, and anyone else who'd appreciate seeing this product.

To share how much time and effort it took to get to purchasing this:

My friend and I weren't able to book events for the trip despite purchasing our tickets 2 months in advance. Our jobs and schedules prevented us from meeting up and planning out places where we'd like to visit. As a result, many of our planned trips were booked days before we went, such was the case with Waku Waku Park. We literally bought the tickets the night before.

The flight, night bus, and shinkansen tickets from Tokyo to Osaka and from Kyoto to Tokyo were purchased the day before we bought the tickets, which was during our bus ride trip to Mount Fuji.

When purchasing tickets for Waku Waku Park, my SxF moots recommended I purchase online or at Lawson--I did the latter. For whatever reason, I just couldn't purchase the tickets online, so I went to Lawson and found a machine that sells general tickets to the public. I recall this experience being so frustrating because they did have an English translation option for the homepage ONLY. Once I clicked the platform that sold Waku Waku Park tickets, all text went back to Japanese. I couldn't read it, so I had to contact my SxF moot (who was fortunately still in Japan and went through this experience like me AND could read and speak in Japanese) explain to me what I was looking at. I also used Google Lens to help make sense of whatever I was reading. I probably spent over 10 minutes trying to figure that shit out until the shop clerk finally came over to see if he can help me complete the form and check out my purchase (poor kid didn't know English but we somehow managed).

When my friend and I arrived in Osaka, we had forgotten to book a B&B since we knew that there was a high likelihood that we'd stay overnight. I purchased a 1-day Osaka trip pass, assuming that we'd be able to go to every place offered on the list, but nope, my friend crashed after Waku Waku Park. As a result of booking so early in the morning, we were fortunate to have found a B&B that was ready by 1 PM (?) maybe 3 PM (?). I can't remember other than the fact that when I requested if we could come early, they told me we couldn't come until check-in time. So, we went to ATC Gallery (Waku Waku Park) with our luggages (fortunately, they were light but it was a nuisance to have carried it around). We were also fortunate that ATC Gallery, when arriving to the building via metro station, had a locker that could fit our luggage--so thank goodness we didn't have to carry it during the exhibit.

We learned that once you exit the exhibit--which means you exit the merch shop--you are NOT allowed to come back in. Even, when your companion was still inside, you couldn't go back in. My friend left the merch shop since there were no places for her to sit and wait for me. So she stepped out of the shop. Apparently, there are gates with workers preventing people from re-entering. And so, when I experienced problems with my card, I called my friend to have her lend me her credit card. That's when we experienced that problem. The officer was kind enough to allow my friend to hand me her card so that I could pay for my haul of merch. But imagine, if we both left the shop to go to a store to withdraw money? There was no Lawson store nearby so we'd have to take the metro and find one, buy a ticket, return to the venue, go through the exhibit AGAIN (I probably would have to repeat playing the minigames, collecting stamps, and having my photo taken out of courtesy rather than rushing through the exhibit), and then finally arrive at the merch shop. But considering the time we entered the park around 1:30 PM and spent 2 hours in the park, I believe that it would have ended with a very tight schedule (the park closes at 6:00 PM) and a very unhappy companion.

In conclusion, removing my watermarks means you (the watermark remover) discredit me and disrespect all of my time, effort, and money I invested just to get a high-quality scan of this clear file just for you to enjoy looking at and most likely saving it to your collection of SxF images. You are also a THIEF for not only stealing my scanned image and re-uploading my scan with a horrible cut and my watermarks removed with AI, but also for the fact that you DID NOT pay for a round-trip ticket to Japan, you DID NOT pay for your own ticket to Waku Waku Park, you DID NOT purchase this clear file yourself, and you DID NOT spend money on a scanner to get this high-quality image to post on the internet.

I know that this is MY SCANNED image of the official art because I can see ghost texts of my watermark between Loid and Yor and near Anya's finger and Bond's forehead. I can see the residual cut off of the weird light-blue scan found near Loid's head. The most obvious is that the red leaf between Yor and Loid was horribly "removed" by AI (dear, I use AI to edit out people from my photos, it doesn't take a trained and perfectionist eye to notice something looks fucked up).

Below is an example of me using AI, and this is not how it should look without people. There was a clear pathway behind the people but AI decided to cover it with grass. Keep in mind that to arrive to THIS AI edit, it took me over an hour to repeat the removal process since AI's edit is RANDOM every time. I am an extreme perfectionist, so I tend to waste hours on end to find AI edits that look convincing (I'm not gonna bother putting a watermark on this because my face is there).

Furthermore, as far as I'm aware (at this current time), I know that my scan is the only one that has resurfaced this image. The official merch image of this design is quite difficult to find and reference. I would've sourced it by now if I had already found it, but I've spent 6 hours writing this entire post as is and still couldn't find it.

The person who shared the removal of my watermark on Twitter/X was unaware of the importance for watermarking scans and had been cooperative by taking down her original post. I have provided a post to my scans on Twitter/X here, and a link to the original source found on my Ko-Fi shop. I currently have no beef with her, nor am I attacking her with this post. What she had presented to me was an opportunity to educate.

If you're looking for official merch that do not have watermarks slashed across their products, then your best bet is to find them from official merch websites and/or official merch images. Obviously, they want you to purchase their products. Second, they have the legal rights and trademark (TM) to flex that they own it, so I highly doubt anyone would go out of their way to edit an official work and claim it as their image.

My experience alone confirms that had I not put a watermark on my scan, I would have definitely gotten this scan stolen. As far as I'm aware, my scan is the ONLY ONE (at this current moment) that pops up in Google searches. It pops up via Tumblr from @yumeka-sxf Spy x Family miscellaneous collab scans - part 3 post.

I'm so grateful to have received advice from @yumeka-sxf because she encouraged me to protect my scans having experienced multiple thefts from her oldest scanned images in the past.

TLDR; Don't remove people's watermarks on scanned pictures (especially if they're put on official merch). We have the right to post watermarks on our pictures/scans because we spent ungodly time and effort to find them, spent money to purchase them, scanned/took high-quality pictures of them, and kindly shared our collection(s) FOR FREE for people to enjoy, share the experience, and/or inspire them to purchase one themselves. Unfortunately, the decision to put watermarks over purchased merch is because there are people who are willing to do whatever it takes to edit out credit and watermarks found in corners or in open spaces to claim ownership of the image. I have also seen merchants' product pictures being stolen by other sellers who just happen to have the same product (yes, I'm calling Ebay and Mercari out). That's why there are sellers who take pictures of their products next to their usernames.

If you have read everything until the very end, you have my gratitude. I hope that this post has been educational in helping everyone become aware that watermarks are used to credit people's time, effort, and money to share high-quality scans/pictures of official merch that they purchased. The reason you can see it is because of their efforts to share it.

[lanawinterscigarettes]

What Dies Doesn't Always Stay Buried (Missy/Gomez! Master x reader x Thirteenth Doctor)

Summary: you left your home to travel with the Doctor after the loss of Missy, but what happens when she comes back?

Warnings: implications of the reader going through the different stages of grief, references to overdrinking, mild swearing, starts sad but ends happy, the beginnings of a surprisingly healthy poly relationship between Missy, reader and the Doctor, suggestive comment made by Missy near the end

A/N: is this an incredibly niche pairing that I wrote for? yes. but I can't get the thoughts I have of Missy x 13 out of my mind, so I can't be bothered to apologize for it. I just sort of spilled out a bunch of nonsense onto my keyboard so the plot, storyline, ending, literally any of it might be garbage, but eh. most people probably aren't going to see this anyway, and if I cared that much I wouldn't be posting it in the first place

Everything felt dull and gray after you lost Missy. It was like nothing you did mattered anymore. You started acting reckless and stopped caring about the consequences of your actions. Not that you thought about them too much before, but at least then you had Missy to enjoy the chaos with. Not anymore.

You honestly didn't think there was anything or anyone that could ever make you feel happy again. Until the Doctor showed back up and did just that. Out of all the people you thought could possibly make you feel better, never in a million years would you have ever expected it to be them.

They found you wasted in some shady bar on a planet you'd crashed Missy's TARDIS on, drunkenly trying to pick a fight with an alien who was much bigger than you. After paying your tab and apologizing profusely to both the bartender and several of the patrons, they dragged you outside and propped you up against the wall of the bar's alleyway.

"What the hell were you thinking? What are you trying to do, get yourself killed?" Something about this random stranger seemed awfully familiar, but considering you were utterly wasted it was difficult for you to recognize them for who they were.

"Look here, blondie," you slurred in annoyance, shooting them an unimpressed glare. "Who are you-" you jabbed your finger at their chest to emphasize your point "-to tell me what to do?"

The stranger scoffed and rolled their eyes at your rude behavior. "I'm the Doctor, obviously." She looked down at her frame before adding in a mutter under her breath, "though I suppose I do appear a bit different than last time."

Your eyes widened almost comically at her words as you finally put two and two together. "Oh, hey, I know you-" You went to give her a friendly pat on the arm but instead toppled forward, landing against her.

She let out a soft "oof" as she caught you, sighing as she realized just how out of it you appeared to be. "Alright, that's it. I'm taking you with me."

"Wha- hey, no, you can't just take me in like I'm a stray dog," you protested as she took you by the arm and helped you to her TARDIS, doing just that.

You didn't remember much more from that night other than waking up with a killer hangover, but since then you'd been staying with the Doctor and accompanying her on her travels. She gave you the option to go back home, bringing it up several times in fact, but each time you refused.

Missy was gone, meaning you had no home to go back to. And while you never told her the real reason why you didn't want to leave, you were sure The Doctor knew.

At first you wanted nothing to do with her, refusing to leave your room. Eventually that grew boring, and you found yourself reluctantly making conversation with the Doctor whenever you bumped into her on your mindless walks through the seemingly never ending halls of the TARDIS.

It brought you peace, as they reminded you of the ones that Missy had in hers. You'd sit there on the floor, staring at the ceiling as you wallowed in your grief until either the Doctor found you or you fell asleep.

You wanted to stay soaking in your ceaseless pain forever, feeling guilty anytime you found it in you to smile or laugh. Especially whenever it was caused by the sonic screwdriver wielding blonde.

It felt like betrayal, to be able to find happiness and peace with your former love's best enemy. But after everything you'd been through, you couldn't help it.

You knew you'd cling to the next person you formed a connection with after Missy's death, regardless of who it was. And even though you tried to keep your distance, tried to brush off your feelings as the misplaced love you still had for Missy, it was more than that. Much more.

The feelings you grew for the Doctor weren't shallow or fake, they were very much real. After being alone and miserable for so long, you were able to get rid of your grief and let it all go, finally accepting that you were happy.

You and the Doctor were in love, and even though you still cared for Missy you were finally able to accept her being gone. Until all hell broke loose when the one thing you never expected would happen did- she came back.

The Doctor had taken you on one of her standard 'let's land on this random planet and see what comes of it' trips. The two of you were walking hand in hand through the ruins of some ancient civilization, stopping occasionally to study the crumbling architecture.

You listened as she happily rambled on about the city's people and what inevitably caused their downfall, smiling to yourself at her childlike nature. As you glanced around the room that she'd told you was once used as a temple of sorts, your eyes caught a small compact mirror that lay on the ground.

Letting go of her hand, you knelt down and carefully picked it up. It was much too modern looking and not nearly damaged enough to have come from this time period. "Hey, Doc, what's this?"

She stopped mid sentence and moved to crouch down next to you, carefully taking the compact mirror from you. "I'm not exactly sure." She admitted as she turned it over in her hands, studying it closely. "Obviously it's a mirror of sorts, but it doesn't appear to be from this time period, or, hell, even this planet."

Before you could respond, a silky voice cut through the room, one that didn't belong to either of you. "That would mine. I must've dropped it, silly me."

Both of your heads snapped up immediately, the Doctor's eyes narrowing in suspicion as yours widened in shock. You couldn't believe who it was. There was just no way. It was impossible. It couldn't be her.

"Who is it?" The Doctor asked cautiously as she stood, carefully pulling you off the ground with her. You wanted to say something to reassure her, but your words seemed to fail you. There was so much that you had to say, and yet when you went to speak, nothing came out.

An amused chuckle came from the same shadowy area that the voice had. "Oh, Doctor, surely you haven't forgotten me already." The person to which the voice belonged stepped forward, moving out of the shadows and in toward the light.

Your previous suspicions were confirmed almost instantly, your jaw dropping as you took in the sight of the woman before you. It was Missy, just like you'd thought.

Her hair was down and looked curly from being unbrushed, she was lacking any makeup, and her clothes looked like she stole them from the previous Master, but it was definitely her. If you hadn't known her so well, you might not've been able to recognize her at first, but you figured that was possibly done by her on purpose.

"Missy," you breathed her name out, your hand instinctively reaching out for her. She smiled at you softly, moving her own hand out to take yours as she took a few steps closer.

"Hello, dear." Her eyes traveled along the features of your face slowly, as if she was trying to take you in. "I take it you missed me."

She flickered her gaze from you over to where the Doctor stood. She hadn't spoken once since the dramatic reveal, uncharacteristic for her as she usually could never shut up. "What's the matter? Didn't expect to see me again so soon, now did you?" Missy asked proudly, seeming quite smug.

Instead of speaking, the Doctor just continued to stand there for a moment before lunging forward and pulling Missy in for a bone crushing hug. You're not entirely sure what was said, but it sounded a lot like the Doctor muttered "I missed you", followed by a soft apology.

Both you and Missy were speechless. Neither of you had been expecting this tender display of affection to come from her. Anger, maybe, sure. Sorrow, even, you might've thought. But not this.

You watched in awe as Missy hesitantly used her free hand to pat the Doctor's back, her proud demeanor softening as she melted into the hug. After a few moments, you felt her tug on your hand gently as a subtle invitation to join the two.

That was all it took. You moved over to them, wrapping your arms around the two loves of your life as you let out a quiet sigh of content. Part of you had been worried that the Doctor would try to keep you away from Missy as a means to protect you, so you were relieved to see that didn't seem to be the case.

"I love you." Your soft voice cut through the comfortable silence, causing the four heartbeats belonging to the two Time Ladies in front of you to quicken. "Both of you."

"Ah, well, I love you, too," the Doctor replied somewhat awkwardly, as you'd never said that to her before.

Missy let out an amused giggle before speaking, having already heard this sentiment coming from you before numerous times. "So do I. I couldn't stop loving you if I tried."

It didn't slip past you how she seemed to be addressing both you and the Doctor, and judging by how the blonde's cheeks flushed it apparently hadn't gone unnoticed by her either.

"That's- that's great, then." She stammered out nervously, avoiding looking Missy directly in the eyes. "Let's head back to the TARDIS, then, shall we? I'm sure Missy must want to change into something that's more her style."

"Yes, let's. And if you're lucky, I just might let you help me out of the clothes I'm wearing." Missy added in a low purr, something that made you grin in delight while the Doctor's face turned redder still. It was nice to know that even in this new dynamic involving the three of you, some things hadn't changed.

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🏷 taglist: @theonetruepotato87 @sessa23

[sister-lucifer]

Genuinely curious why someone who seems to sexualize (fictional) serial killers and (fictional) murderers draws the line at "proship" stuff, which is also very much fictional? Aren't most horror characters actively problematic? Or is it virtue signaling with little knowledge of what "proship" actually is, you're just trying to show that you're not like "other" freaks, even if you're cut from the same cloth. Lumping people who ship weird stuff in Fandom spaces in with literal nazis is such a silly take. It just trivializes the sentiment when you say that you believe real life nazis are on par with people who engage with dark topics in fiction. You're a "proshipper" by the very nature of the fandoms you're in, as horror is the most "problematic" a medium there is.

[tws for discussion of sex abuse, gore and incest under the cut]

pro shipping is the attempt to normalize things like incest and pedophilia within shipping and fandoms. while yes these characters are fictional, and i completely support the existence of dark content as a medium to explore these topics, my issue is with the fact that proshippers want to treat incestuous and pedophilic relationships as normal. there’s no trigger warnings on proship content, no indication or attempt to keep these things away from those it could harm (pro shipping is also super common in fandoms of kids shows, like steven universe and MLP, which is super worrying for obvious reasons). There’s a difference between writing something dark to explore its existence vs writing about a father raping his young daughter as though it’s a completely normal and healthy relationship. that sort of content pushes the idea that children can consent and want sex, and often pushes blame onto victims of assault. with no tws or any sort of attempts to guard this content, and the fact that the way it’s written actively seeks to normalize these actions, it’s incredibly dangerous.

i expanded more on this sort of idea in this post (and there’s a follow up here if that matters idk), which i highly recommend anyone who’s questioning this sort of thing reads and takes a look at the other things linked in said post, because i do think it’s important to have these discussions. there’s a difference between normalizing and exploration. everything i write has a content/warnings section. i don’t want gore porn to be normalized, which should be inherently clear by the fact that all of my dark fiction has a wide array of trigger warnings on it to make sure no one thinks it’s normal or will accidentally stumble upon it. i’m happy to have my niche little community, but i would never want something so shocking to be easily stumbled upon by someone who didn’t want to see it.

there’s a difference between writing something dark or disturbing while actively advertising the fact that it’s not for everyone, vs posting “ship” art of a child being abused and acting like it’s so cute and perfect. someone who didn’t know better could take that to heart.

sex abuse is real and rampant in our society, and it affects and hurts people every day. that’s different than fake serial killers.

also…i fail to see how having both nazis and proship on my dni is equating them? youre allowed to put whatever you want on your dni. i’ve seen people with “creepypasta fans” right next to “proshippers” on their dni, and i don’t say anything, i just move on. it’s not my business why they don’t want those people interacting with them; maybe it’s because they had a bad experience in that fandom, maybe it’s because they don’t want to see gore, maybe it’s because the stories just unsettle them, why do i care? it’s not a personal attack against me, it’s just their prerogative. it’s not my place to argue with them, they can put whatever they want on their dni and it’s not my place to try and change their mind. they’re not equating or lumping in anything, they just don’t want those people interacting with them. and that’s fair enough.

it’s also a bit of a stretch to call horror a “problematic” medium when the very nature of it is meant to be disgusting and scary. if its disgusts and scares you…..good?

you’ll never find me in someone’s inbox trying to change their mind about what they are or are not comfortable with, i just block and move on, like everyone should really. i’ve seen some seriously dogshit takes on this site, and despite how absolutely abhorrent they are, i just block and move on. it’s easier, safer and happier that way.

if you really care this much, you can make your own post about it, or come out of your anonymous box and talk to me for real. i sure as hell don’t care that much, so i won’t guarantee you’ll get a response.

seriously though, if you hate me that much, just block me and move on. in fact, i actively support people blocking me. it reduces conflict, and i know that my content isn’t for everyone, and that’s totally okay.

i don’t want this response to come off as angry or indignant because really these sort of discussions are important, i just can’t say with my whole heart that you sent this ask because you wanted to talk; you sent it because you’re angry at me for what you perceive to be a slight against you or something you believe in. i get it. but believe me, you get a lot more out of life when you remove the things that make you upset instead of trying to argue with them. start caring less and blocking liberally 👍

[hanzajesthanza]

Dude, I just wanna say I am SOOOOO excited for your video essay on the Witcher. I have been waiting for a good essay covering more than the games and Netflix series for months now, as I like to listen to longer videos as I work during the mornings and I just know this is going to be so good. I've always loved reading your posts and analysis on the characters and arcs that books encompass, so I just wanted to share that I'm incredibly hyped for this, and I know you did an absolutely wonderful job piecing everything together and creating it :) I hope it gets the millions of views it DESERVES!!

i don't know where to begin, all i can say is thank you!! this ask totally made my night!

thank you not only for the encouragement, acknowledgement, validation... but for being. for being there, being excited, interested in the same topics. i'm just so happy i get to share this with people, that we get to share this—the fandom, the whole story, not just the video—together.

i'm really just so excited to share it and i hope everyone likes it or gets something useful out of it (and if it's not your vibe that's ok too!! everyone is invited!) like, i'm excited that you're excited... lol!

i really wanted to make something "quality" for people and for the channel, both in writing and in design. so there's a degree of storytelling that went into it, and i tried to make it visually engaging and structure it so that it's not just a spew of information, but like a little journey for everyone to come along with me on. most of the research was new for me too, so it's like we get to figure it out together.

below the cut is this kind of "diary entry": a long, contemplative, stream-of-consciousness response, haha...

(you don't have to read this, especially because i got a little emotional in it, i just thought i'd take the time to respond to authenticity with authenticity and get some things off of my mind... in reflection of the video, but also just about my personal life lol.)

i initially felt worried that people wouldn't get what i'm doing and would misinterpret my arguments, but despite these urges to explain myself a thousand times, i ultimately let my writing speak for me, and shut down the need to apologize and cover up what is decent work with a littering of disclaimers. i realized i actually can't stand it myself when youtubers go through the whole rigmarole of "sorry i haven't posted," "sorry it's not perfect," "sorry my pronunciation is bad," "sorry i'm not an expert" before they get to the actual video or what they want to say... i'm all: "lol, no worries. i wasn't expecting perfection, i'm just here to watch what you made." and i feel like most people have a similar reaction.

i know the concept of "fandom" has often a poor reputation online as a toxic space filled with drama, witch hunts, offensive behavior, self-absorbed conduct... and of course, there is some truth to that... but, there's also the good side of "fandom," which often goes ignored in narratives about it. i think "fandom" is just a niche kind of "community," and communities are simply groups of people (human beings, which have primal troupe-like natures, both build each other up and tear each other down, faction-like, warring, but also protective, loving fiercefully)...

it was different fandoms back then, of course, a little over ten years ago, but when i first got into "fandom" stuff online as a pre-teen, it was just night and day as opposed to my socializing in real life.

in discovering niche interests, passions, and yes, of course fictional universes that draw you in... i've always had only so few people to share that with in real life—when it comes to popular medias, of course, these medias were things that everybody in my school class was into, my friends had gotten me into it—but as i grew a little older and went on my own explorative journeys, i became most passionate about things that no one around me knew of or cared about, and suddenly, it was really lonely.

it had been a bit lonely before that, i always liked the media a little "too much," to the point of my friends asking me if we can stop playing pretend on the schoolyard and go watch the boys play four-square instead :'D or if we could please talk about anything else other than [media]. these are just childhood stumbles, which i imagine everyone has... but i mean, in this younger childhood, at least we could talk about media stuff sometimes, and i wasn't shunned too badly for it. but interests shifted and i got into things that only interested me, then i became truly alone on the recess yard.

when i first got into "fandom" online: groups of fans of [shared interest], who want to learn more about/talk and listen to others about/share and see more of [shared interest], and that entire world fit on my little iphone as i sat by the fence during lunch period, okay, i'm being so melodramatic here, but it was like a "welcome home." it was like discovering an entire little fairy world in the hollow of a tree. you mean to tell me, this place has existed, all this time? people who have the same interest, who want to talk about it, who are even—ha ha, just imagine—interested in what i have to say about it? those people exist, and they also have their own things to say, which i can listen and respond to? an actual faerieland. magic.

alright, i'll chill out. it's just social media, it's just social exchanges. but social exchanges are powerful, as human beings, we're evolutionarily driven to crave them. social media so often gets seen as fleeting exchanges, shallow engagement, but i—and probably a lot of tumblr's demographic—don't most often speak in staccato sentences online, but rather paragraphs, essays, hell, documents. we try to talk to each other kind of like we would in real life, we collaborate in building canons, worlds, have real discussions about media and society and... life. i don't know if anyone's studied this kind of experience as much as the generic "social media rots your brain" narrative, but it's been mine.

when i talk about [media interest], of course here and now it's specifically the witcher, i'm doing it because i'm part of this community, this whole forum, agora... i want to talk, but i moreover want to be listened to, to share, to be in conversation, not just be alone with my thoughts and interests.

it kind of boggles my mind, because i spent so long (ever since those aforementioned playground days) feeling like talking about anything fandom-related was excruciating for the people around me: that absolutely no one is interested in this but yourself, so get used to it.

so now, the fact that, sometimes when i post something, write something, draw something, make a video, or just say anything about this interest, that other people see that and it resonates with them, they enjoy it, it moves them, they're not annoyed, but also inquisitive, eager to talk about this thing, to share, too... like yourself, so kind to send me a message like "i'm interested in, excited for what you have to say," that's fucking crazy to me, it makes me so grateful, and also puts me in almost a state of disbelief! not just that i'm flattered, but that we share the same interest, have similar questions and desire for discussion about it, and live in a time where we can talk about this together over an instant, online communication... that no one has to suffer alone with their interests, no one has to feel isolated and weird and not know what to make of themselves.

despite fandom being seen as mean and shallow, (... similar to fantasy, come to think of it—interesting parallel with the actual subject of the video!) it's also a group of dynamic communities, that are sharing and criticizing and... just, communicating. the ability to communicate, the culture of communication is so important.

working on this project, somewhat fittingly, made me realize that the world is very gray, and nothing is even wholly good or wholly evil. this, of course, mostly applies to the politics and history and the story of the witcher which i'll be talking about in the video;

but what i realized is that this lesson also applies to mundane things, common anxieties i have. for example, that social media is not just bad or good, it's a tool with certain outcomes depending on how you use it. that people probably won't totally ignore you and shun everything you have to say, but they also won't listen to your every word. that success in life isn't impossible, but it's also probably not going to turn out as it is in your wildest dreams.

we're (~gen Z including zillennials and young millennials) surrounded with so much doomerist culture related to our prospects in life, especially as relates to contemporary media culture and life success, but it's not hopeless. you can always be an outlier of the broader trend. sometimes, you have to choose to be an outlier of the trend.

this is something i begin to talk about towards the end of the video. bagiński and hissrich basically see the trend and go: "looks like their attention spans are fucked, better speed up the process" instead of allowing themselves to be different, instead of embracing what makes them ("fantasy") special, trying so hard to conform... and hurting themselves from it. and looking at that, i just realized, i really don't want to follow that example and do something similar to myself.

i have to be bold enough to put my authentic self out there, even if it's "too complex to be understood", if it doesn't appeal to everyone, even if it turns some people away. it doesn't matter, because i only have one "me" to share, i can't force myself to be something i'm not. what i can do is seek out the people who i think will understand, who will be interested in that complexity. of course, this is something anyone whose advice is worth a grain of salt will tell you, has told me—but maybe i only understood it best when a witcher metaphor was applied :p

i'm in my 20s, and it's been so strange for me after i graduated college (undergrad), since what's now been two years ago. i spent my entire life in school, and suddenly no more school :( so i'm trying to regrow, or maybe grow in a different direction, that part of me that i lost when i had to graduate and get out... i'm struggling with feelings of failure every day, that i haven't met anyone's expectations for me since graduation, there has been so many feelings of worthlessness and confusion, i've so lost without school: a neat structured framework where everything gets measured and you get nice summaries of how you're doing in life.

it's horrified me upon discovering that, in life, no one measures how you're doing! you just live, and no one says "you're doing alright here, but here you could use some improvement." no one gives you direction, you have to plot your own map of unexplored territory. and suddenly, i don't know who i am anymore, where i'm going, why i do anything, what my purpose or use is. and, because i'm not in a class where there's a grade average, i also have no idea how everyone else is doing, only a vague feeling that i'm far behind. so it's really been confusing, demotivating...

as this video essay project dragged on, for about double the time i thought it was going to take, this sense of guilt and shame started to overtake me. throughout the project, i had this nagging paternalistic chiding in my head that i should be chasing success, career, relationships, life... but instead i'm wasting my time on the witcher, writing something no one cares about and people won't acknowledge me for. throwing away my time on something that doesn't matter. it was very contradictory, because i liked working on this project a lot, and of course and obviously i love the subject(s) it's about.

but i felt so fucking guilty for not pounding the linkedin pavement everyday and instead spending my time and effort on this video, lol. related back to what i spoke of earlier in this, that fandom is seen as petty and stupid—it's not something to be proud of. in my saddest moments, i thought of how my favorite professors might react if they knew that after graduation, this was the biggest project i had pursued. and my cheeks reddened in shame, i sweat from anxiety... literally as i write this, my hands are kind of shaking and i'm a bit nauseous imagining having to admit something like that to them. i mean, just think of every little kid that's like "i wanna be a youtuber!" it's adorable when you're 13, not so much when you're 23. and again, contradictory! because this is something i'm so stupidly passionate about, i'm unable to abandon it for something more "honorable"! i felt, i often feel, pathetic for how much i love things that no one cares about.

but upon completing this essay, i realized that this was something i started and finished, by myself, for... well, not "for myself," it's for you guys, but for self-motivated reasons, i.e., i wasn't seeking anyone's pride or approval—of course, your pride and approval would be nice to have and i wouldn't deny it! but i really did this for the values i have about community, for educational and discussional purposes, and of course, love for the witcher.

i realized that i made this because i wanted to make something to share with others, for other's benefit, which, upon reflection, has little to do with what others think of me. and that's really interesting, because i've, in school, in the majority of my life, i think i've been chasing the approval of others, i really wither away without it... so it's cathartic to realize that i put effort into, i spent my time on, making something not for approval, just out of passion. there's some kind of valuable life lesson learned here, i bet... some kind of personal growth...

but yeah, it's kind of weird. i guess my path doesn't look like everyone else's, i probably look like a loser to a lot of people right now if they could see me. but this video is evidence that i've grown and matured (in ways which maybe other people had already achieved for themselves, and maybe they haven't...) it's proof that i'm not stagnant, that life does exist in me still, and it's taking a form i didn't expect. a person is emerging from me. i can only watch with anticipation for who they'll become.

[goldenpinof]

what you said about youtube being a unique stressor made me realize that dan doesn't really have the personality for internet fame. he is (and i don't mean this unkindly i just couldn't think of a nicer phrase) an attention seeker. he can be extremely self-absorbed and bordering on vain, and has also been highly reactive/sensitive to criticism in the past (this is less true or at least less public now). which is fine and even expected from many entertainers EXCEPT online. because unlike a musician, an actor, or even most comedians (depending on the style of their comedy), his fame is not dependant on a particular talent but on the persona he projects as a whole. success on youtube, at least the niche he's found on youtube, is dependant on parasocial attachment. people need to connect and relate to him (or at least his public persona, which when he was younger he had a lot of trouble separating from "him"). and the attention-seeking, vaulted attitude doesn't naturally lend itself to relatability. i think he's quite self-aware of this, and it certainly didn't hold him back at the peak of the dnp brand, but i think it's part of why youtube feels less comfortable for him than other forms if entertainment that have traditionally more of a boundary between creator and creation. his comedy is very confessional, so obviously it is about him, but it's also about the general quality of it as a piece of comedy writing, and the quality of the other aspects put into it by others. the book is about him, but it's also about the information within it and the quality of the writing. as you said, something he's made vs something he is

don't forget that i don't know for sure. i'm just basing my thoughts on what he says/does if i even remember it correctly.

you can be right. i like what you said about "a bondary between creator and creation", that makes a lot of sense. (my take below, i guess)

throughout the years he was the main target for attention and criticism because his content was his personality (more or less). and he doesn't like to be criticised, he doesn't really know what to do with it. but if you criticise his work (shows, book, board game), you criticise an object rather than him. and yes, Dan can be hurt by it as well (boo, how could you not like what i created?), but it's less personal. also, he can always think/say that someone just doesn't get it, it's not for everyone. if his projects still make money, who cares about "them haters". it's harder if your face or personality are viewed as unlikeable. like, "how could you not get my videos aka me and the experiences i had?" especially when you grow up and mature on the internet (18 to 25 are probably the hardest years when you are finally free to do anything but don't know shit and don't have money, also you just lost all your school/childhood friends and have to either decide on education or job. basically, alone. your whole worldview is shifting, and of course it's incredibly hard if all your fuck ups are on the internet). i bet he was stressing so much trying to appear likable to as many people as he could and to simultaneously please the algorithm (when it became important). alas! it will never happen on the internet.

i hope he really gives 0 fucks about how the content they are making now is perceived on social media. and about comments some people make when he posts certain pictures. he likes personal attention as well, so i do think a part of him enjoys internet fame (the positive side of it). he can't get everything irl, it's easier to receive it online. and he receives it online more than irl.

we will see how it goes, because tours are one thing. a book was a completely separate business. Dan is not okay, if it's a series on a big platform that is not youtube, would be a whole new experience for Dan, and for us because of the outsiders. there could be criticism (it's in people's nature) and i'd love to see how Dan works with it. he didn't pay any attention to the negative reviews his book received. maybe because he wasn't present online, idk. but some sort of series is a bigger deal.

[cosmic-ships]

I'm sending in another gush ticket 🎫, this time for whoever you most want to talk about rn :> Have at it! (dragonsmooch)

I'm late getting at this sorry! I tend to save some of these for days like this when it's hard so I got something nice to talk about! Thank you so much Dragon~!

U-Uhm I'm gonna go off about Phillip~! <3333

I won't get super into it but I've been attaching myself to him a lot today because I feel like out of all of my f/o he understands to an extent of what it feels like to have family troubles as he is always seen as the "screw up" of the family. His isn't as bad as mine but he is such a great comfort to me... <3 Awe Phillip is one of my comfort characters!

at first my initial reaction about wanting to gush about him was "I love everything about him!" Which is true, I do but I want to go into better detail! Wouldn't be much of a gush post otherwise.

Phillip has a very infectious energy, he strolls into the room and all eyes are zeroed in on him, he has this amazing ability to make everyone around him feel special. He is the type of person to know every single person in the room and a specific niche detail about said person! He's very much an extrovert which I kinda love. Helps bring me out of my shell a bit but I also love that he'll know when I need a break!

This man can make me laugh like no one else. Much like myself he can find some humor in any kind of situation even if its bad. He's got a very quick wit and I adore his playful banter! He gets this adorable little goofy grin on his face that instantly brightens my mood when I'm feeling sad. His smile is contagious and his laughter is infectious, It's incredibly hard not to smile or laugh whenever I with him.

He's also so adventurous which I absolutely adore!! He's always up for trying new things and going on spontaneous adventures! When we first met I asked "wanna walk through the forest?" he goes "It's midnight..?" and I'm all "Yes….your point?" He got this goofy little grin and said "I'll get the flashlights!" He has an enthusiasm for life and every day feels brand new and thrilling whenever I am with him~

Phillip is so passionate as well~ He goes after what he wants and he has the drive and the determination, he puts his whole heart into everything he does, now sometimes it doesn't last too long but nobody can ever say he never had his heart in that specific thing be it a job or a hobby. He makes the most out of every moment.

Phillip is also so caring and attentive. He really listens, he makes me feel like I matter and that I'm heard, he's the first one to offer help to anyone who may need it and he likes to make sure those he loves are taken care of. Doesn't matter what it is either, run an errand, a shoulder to cry on, being there for a midnight vent when the world just seems to be too much, he is an endless support for me <3

Phillip makes my world a brighter place just by being in it and I feel so incredibly lucky to have him by my side. He means so much to me and I love him so dearly. He's helping me a lot right now and I couldn't be more grateful to him.

I just hope he knows how much he means to me. <3

[normalhorse]

I have developed a new youtube strategy and if I don't write it down I'll forget but it's working nicely to find wholesome and delightful woodworking stuff I would never have otherwise found/looked at.

ah this is going to go long so executive summary: this is not really about my new youtube strategy but it is about youtube stuff I like and why. And a bit about my youtube strategy I guess. and how I have autism lmao.

For instance this guy:

makes very quietly-spoken, mostly shop footage and talking to camera (and a bit of inserted reference footage or pov shots, too) videos, making nice furniture out of nice hardwoods and self-made recycled skateboard plywood.

This all delivered with an affect my wife wife described as "radiating warmth and light" and a genuinely engaging and crucially understated enthusiasm. perfect blend of cali skater zen and also manual crafts zen.

Obligatory #youtube grammar notes: nothing egregious so far! One word really caught my attention (not enough for me to, like, remember what it was for sure - I think it was furthermore?), as being far enough away from exactly right as to be jarring also (Andrew if you ever read this I am trying very hard to write this in a way that doesn't seem, like, aggressively negative but if it does, [and this is unsolicited criticism so why wouldn't it] as a countermeasure: you're doing great! one and a half weird words in idk half an hour of footage is frankly incredible. and your videos are lovely. thanks!). The 'half' was one instance out of several uses of 'itself' also hit wrong but I can't explain why even to myself so who cares.

Anyway, it's exactly my shit except a lot of his thumbnails look like high energy sfx-heavy youtube maker stuff yelled at me by a bro (Sorry again Andrew once again you are doing great!) which I would never click on except for my grand strategy of:

subscribe early, subscribe often

just like follow links in videos when you watch a nice video and the presenter says 'inspired by a video from ...' - if they make the kind of videos you want, there's a better than average chance people that inspire them do too.

Yes, the second thing should have been blindingly obvious, but I have a medical condition and don't have to notice things.

Mostly it's that the links are now in the readmore of the description field, and I usually don't read those because they register in my brain as post signatures, so I maybe read the whole readmore once per channel.

(for the sake of internet epoch claiming the relevant signatures are on usenet)

That is, I expect the description to have the same content all the time after the obligatory first line modification (i.e. the actual video description text). There's usually a huge identical section of socmed links, affiliate links to products used in the video, affiliate links to endorsed products/channel sponsors generally.

So I didn't know that sometimes there are video/channel links in there, ok? Also there's a popup info panel but I think I adblocked it lmao.

Anyway. Subscribe early, subscribe often, though: Because windows just shuts itself the fuck down whenever it wants, and chrome no longer restores smashed windows by default (presumably for ultimately surveillance-enhancing reasons), and I have watch history turned off on youtube (yeah I know but also listen being paranoid about the internet is my actual job I am allowed to be a weirdo if I want), once I open a linked video in a new tab or whatever, if the video looks cool I subscribe immediately, because I won't watch it now and I'll lose the tab tomorrow.

Anyway this is probably exactly the usage model youtube would like me to have, but because I have watch history turned off I don't get youtube's """highly curated""" recommended bullshit, I only see <search results for niche interest query> and stuff recommended from videos I'm already subscribed to. So like sort of their model but much more actually useful to me.

cool strategy bro

but yeah the real question is hey do you know any more channels like this for carpentry/metalwork/basically any craft stuff? hit me with yr haberdashery yr leatherwork your embroidery - but not cooking for some reason. because they are extremely important for my little mental health right now cheers

[3-inch-sam]

just letting you know the op of that anti-censorship post is a pro-ship weirdo

I'm only gonna say this once.

Do not send me this stuff.

Look, I don't know your intentions, but don't send me this kind of "info". Unless you have PROOF, and the person is causing real legitimate harm, like sixpencee or something, I don't care what they like.

The message of anti-censorship is way more important than "this user did x thing that I don't like" (again, only if it's not causing actual harm).

Edit: amending this to say that I'm more educated on this topic now. i want to start off with

If you are in a friend group that tells you to cut people off or harass them based solely on their fictional tastes, please please seek help outside of that group. As a former cult member myself- yes, that is a cult mindset- that is incredibly dangerous thinking that will fuck you up for a long time. Please talk to someone you trust if that happens to you, that's how a lot of real predators isolate their victims.

If you put fictional characters above real living people I have no respect for you. Real people will ALWAYS be more important. Yes that includes the freaks and weirdos with niche fetishes that you think are gross.

If you think that fiction affects reality in such a way that writing about anything less than total moral goodness is wrong, I have no respect for you. That's literally "violent video games cause violence" wrapped in shiny new paper. That is not how people generally interact with fiction.

If you think that it's okay to harass, dog pile, fake claim, bully, suicide bait, or threaten people over drawings or fanfic of fictional characters, I have no respect for you. Again, you are putting real living people below drawings and words. That is never ever okay.

There's going to be stuff on the Internet you don't like. There's going to be people on the Internet who make things you don't enjoy. And guess what? It's not their job to cater to you. No one is telling you to engage with things that upset you. You have the power to walk away at any time.

The people who advocate for banning books are never remembered as the good guys.

You are doing the job of queerphobes for them.

all that said, my original statement still stands. i will delete any asks related to this topic. go find someone else to argue with if you really want to so bad.

[kiirotoao]

It doesn't disprove your post but will lies all the time lol. He lies less to mike, but he did lie at least twice before when mike asked if he was okay and he said yes.

Other times he's lied: accepting to dance with the girl at the snowball ("do you wanna dance?", "sure"); when the police is looking for el and he said the skate attack was an accident; when they were at susie's house and were making up a reason to hack the lab; when lucas tries to apologize and will says he doesn't care anymore... he doesn't do it maliciously, but he definitely lies

Ah you’re totally right! I forgot the time in season 2 when he saw the Mind Flayer and lied about needing some air, and he also lied in the theater in season 3 about being okay after getting that spidey sense for the first time. But to be utterly niche, I think that because both of those episodes ended once Mike asked if Will was okay, I mean, technically, Will was okay. Both of those episodes ended really abruptly, but he went from being horrified with an ominous vision to snapping back to reality where things were okay again. And actually this is almost completely off the rails from my original post but once again, if my memory serves me correctly, Mike is the only one to ever snap Will out of those episodes (which I find incredibly precious and intentional).

But okay, back to the point of Will lying about being okay. I honestly can’t deny that - Will is obviously shaken up after he snaps out of each episode, so he does lie to Mike about being okay. Because he sure doesn’t appear to feel okay. And heart-wrenchingly enough, I think that Will lies to Mike in those cases because he doesn’t want to cause trouble, at first, and he always needed multiple instances to confirm that something was really going on. In season 2, it was the Halloween episode, the vision at night outside his house, d’art, maybe even more. In season 3, it was the sense returning on the hill and at Castle Byers.

And so to address the other lies he tells people - in hindsight, I needed some clarification in my post because I wanted to emphasize that Will doesn’t lie to Mike, and so in Mike’s eyes, Will doesn’t lie. Unless Mike witnessed Will lying to others (only while Will was fully conscious, hence his blatant lies whole being possessed in s2 don’t count), Mike sees Will as an honest person. For a majority of the time. So I think that it’s such a poignant emphasizer to see how Will lies to other people: Will doesn’t trust others with his feelings as much as he does Mike. Just like Mike trusts Will, Will trusts Mike. I think I neglected to explain myself on that in my post because I was namely focusing on Mike.

Thank you so much for the critique! It really got me thinking, haha. Maybe too much. I am so glad my brainrot prompted you to bring these things up, too! They’re very good points.

[alifeasvivid]

fic writer questions

tagged by @fireandiceland :D

1.) How many works do you have on AO3

19... it was 39 but I had a major self-loathing moment

2.) What’s your total AO3 count?

word count? 166,516

3.) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

if you mean currently on AO3? just Hetalia. If you mean only on AO3 ever: Kuroshitsuji, Hyouteki no Finder, BotW, and Hetalia

In total through my whole life uhhh >.> a few more than that

4.) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Thief of Spades Season One

Thief of Spades Season Two

Trust

If It's You

Desperate Measures

5.) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

It's gonna be between Last Hurrah and Payback probably... Payback probably wins just because it is incredibly bleak

6.) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Uhhhh hmmm I mean I'd say everything else that's finished they're all about equally happy. I write most fics with the intention of reaching a happy ending that feels earned. From most contrast between the rest of the fic and the ending, I'd say An Impossible Situation

7.) Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

Nah, I'm not interested in crossovers.

8.) Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Oh yeah. What else is there? XD I hope I write *good* smut. After Kuro, I think was really uptight about it and trying to be "clean," but I've loosened up on that a lot and I think it has greatly improved the quality of the smut I write.

I think I have a slight reputation for adding BDSM elements and of course there's my super hardcore kink of writing scenarios where everything is consensual and all parties involved care about and respect each other. It's pretty intense, pretty niche, not a lot of people are into it. LOL As for gender/sexuality >.> who really cares about that kind of thing nowadays?

I also primarily write UKUS, which many people find extremely offensive. 🤣 IT'S A JOKE!

9.) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I used to forget, but I try to do so consistently now because it shows my appreciation because I really like getting comments.

10.) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

EEEEEEYUP.

11.) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge

12.) Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have! :D I consider it to be quite an honor ^-^

13.) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes. A long time ago.

14.) What’s your all time favorite ship?

USUK/UKUS. Nothing else even comes close.

15.) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but you don’t think you ever will?

T_T so many, but mainly Technicolor Heart. I just really like the concept, but that fic would have been soooooooo angsty..... also I don't wanna get ... fuckin.... run off of tumblr.

16.) What are your writing strengths?

Pacing. I know I just have a sense of how a story should progress so that everything feels earned but there's minimal to no dragging. I get told people like my characterizations a lot which is nice ^-^ also my prose is pretty nuanced, but I don't count that as a strength because I think most people don't even notice.

17.) What are your writing weaknesses?

>.> speed. or lack thereof. I can't write action scenes, which dramatically altered the direction of Thief of Spades in particular. I don't have a beta so there's always typos I'm catching months after posting P: I struggle with description/creating atmosphere using sensory info.

18.) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in fic?

I agree with Riva that salutations or endearments are fine, but writing whole scenes that way comes across as pretentious and annoying. Not to mention it can just be really confusing. Write in the language of your audience, it's basically just that simple.

19.) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Pffff. As if I'd say it in public smh. I'll spare 11/12 y/o me the indignity

20.) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Uhhhh hmmm

I mean the Thief of Spades series is always going to have a very special place in my heart but writing something that long with that much plot over such a long time, there's a lot of things about it I wish I could change.

In terms of canonverse type stuff, I love The Shape of Modern Imperialism. For shameless self-indulgence I think Three-Part Harmony is best. But I actually worked really hard on Precious Thing and I'm still quite proud of it.

tagging whoever wants to be.

[cherryblossomshadow]

#and this is why twilight is a horror story rather than a romance #it's about bella being seduced into vampiric mormonism #genuinely mormonism is so insidious (tags courtesy of @lavender fables)

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#hi yes exmo here extremely good post #mormons LOVE to see and portray themselves as victims and outcasts bc of their traditions #comes from a long cultural heritage of being run out of settlements for doing polygamy and child marriages #they very firmly believe that they are the only ones who uphold the TRUE traditions of Jesus's Church #and that because of this everyone even other christians see them as a threat

#every single one of them thinks theyre daniel in the lions den #and they fail to see that in modern times #with their fat coffers and dogmatic dedication to normalcy and americana and tradition #that they are the lions (tags courtesy of @gandalfsbignaturals)

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#also I feel like people generally dont realize how much disproportionate influence mormonism has for a fundamentalist cult #most people will go “oh they're just weird but at least they're niche” #the mormon church owns the most valuable real estate portfolio in the US and has become a global empire #look up the list of wealthiest religious organizations on wikipedia #anyways (tags courtesy of @the-huldra-king)

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#LITERALLY YES #Jacob was such a waste of a character he was so well written until he wasn’t #they turned him into a wolf. a werewolf. they made him violent do you understand how upsetting this is #the wolves were such a good concept but she ruined it by making them the violent #impure ones #Edward is borderline abusive #the cullens are lowkey a cult #like yeah the same could be said about the wolves #but when you really look at the cullens (or vampirism as a whole in the books) it’s very cult-like #as a dark romance book I can set it all aside #but as a critic of fiction all of the characters were essentially “great until it wasn’t”

#on a slightly unrelated note #no one ever acknowledges how Bella’s is clearly affected by her parents’ divorce and their dynamic #like that shit genuinely messed her up #k I’m done talking now sorry for the long rant Mr. Menace lol (tags courtesy of @soupydoopie)

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#yeah. #some good and interesting considerations to be had re: ‘she was just never meant to be human’ #because yeah. she looks down on the other girls she doesn’t even try to make friends with anyone but Jacob it’s all so outside of her #and if smeyer like. cared. about Bella as a character that would say something about her- either that she can’t fit in socially or that she #is just incredibly arrogant towards her peers. and it says nothing instead #because Bella has to be normal and relatable but she also has to be sympathetic #again- it’s as if being ‘normal’ and all the things that should make her socially acceptable are somehow viewed as repellent #as if she’s counterculture by being normative. #everyone ELSE is weird and foreign and childish to Bella. it can never be her. but also she’s special because she’s NORMAL #and it’s all so. inverted. and that’s incredibly frustrating to me

#because I remember reading these books and getting so annoyed because truly. who is Bella. #what are her defining traits? she’s shy? she’s clumsy? she’s kind apparently? she’s deeply emotional? and yet. #these are very human things in comparison to the cullens. they’re graceful; logical; confident #though they apparently also feel deeply they don’t let it get in their way #and it’s like. okay.

so what we’ve done is recreate the myth of the white superior being. #twilight (tags courtesy of @metronomeblue)

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#OO #perfectly said #thinkin bout edward as free will & bella's choice except her freedom was only found in annihilation of herself - #for the sake of what she perceived what be a perfect and beautiful eternity

#even as a kid reading the books i remember feeling that the most natural thing was for bella to live her life with jacob #jacob represented the warmth of the sun. the bright happy smile. the loving community of werewolves. the way he accepted bella #they were actual friends with mutual interests and shared humor #but smeyer nerfed him like he was the creepy incel bff even though that's not who he was at first!!!!

#i say that to say tho that it always felt like twilight was at its core a tragedy. not a love story lol #she sacrificed the warmth of blood and going into sunlight. the warmth of arizona. the warmth of brown eyes and being alive #for coldness. cold pale and dead cullens. marble skin. red eyes. corpses doomed to walk the earth outside of all human society.

#i love this idea for a vampire love story of your cold moonlight lover but like bro smeyer did NOT write that story lol #she wrote a sad ass horror story about a girl who gives up everything endearing about humanity - #her girl bff that wanted to dress shop. the boys at school that played pranks. jacob & his love and motorcycles. cooking food for her dad. #you see her choose this “forever” that feels so fucking hollow and dystopian #like i stg even the metaphor of the meadow scene is like… the flowers bloom in her memories with edward. but they still die too. #like all living things are meant to. #she chose an artificial world that surpassed death where she was kept alive and had to fake her death to everyone else and for what?

#i just see the mormon plight of a young woman who wants to be chosen and loved for time and all eternity - existing in purity forever #living and dying her whole life for the sake of temple marriage. and genuinely believing all other love is simple compared to that.

#bella had so much fucking disdain for everything else and wanted to be a vampire so bad and i feel like the book wanted us to think #that she just never quite fit in with humans and was never meant to be one yknow & that's why. #but this is a TEENAGE girl. she never even got the chance to live!!! she met a boy & believed she found her forever! #veneration of the eternal means nothing when the love you sacrifice for to be with them means you give up everything else #poor bella was depressed af and found her reason for living with edward except the fuckin tragedy is it WASNT living. it was cold death.

#this story is a mf tragedy & everything in this post speaks to it & how it's informed by mormonism #it really is giving “the mormon girl who sacrifices the worldy shit for the eternal” #she should've never touched vampirism bitch she made this shit white supremacist lowkey #lowkey highkey #purity politics is written all over it. purity in a racism sense as well. and purity about “traditional family” type shit. (tags courtesy of @tw1stedthicket)

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#there is a big thing right now with trad couples trying to brand their lifestyles as counterculture #the degenerate mainstream wants you to go to college and get a job and be a feminist … staying home and being a wife and mother is punk : #steering the craft (tags courtesy of @tofixtheshadows)

despite being what we as observers can understand as an extreme example of traditional family + relationship structure, the cullens are notably outcasts in forks. in contrast, bella's father has ties to the werewolves, and states several times that he would prefer bella date jacob. in the events of the story, jacob, an indigenous teenage boy in a jarringly white story, seems to represent imposed normalcy. he becomes more of a sexual threat + subsequent racial caricature as meyer becomes less confident in the reader's understanding that edward and bella are endgame, and is eventually completely destroyed as a character in order to further the idea that choosing edward represents free will for bella (consider imprinting). what we recognize as traditionalism in our world is treated in the world of twilight as something that will forever other you from the rest of the world. the vampires are written as if they are countercultural, even though they aren't. edward even has a whole thing where he says romance was simpler in his time — this is not subtle. all of the cullens are white, pseudoincestuous, and withdrawn from society. does this make sense like do you see what i'm saying here. related: does anyone else think mormonism is scary.

[set-in-eternity]

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something petty af but i hate hypocrisy

katrina ariana holte, of edelweiss patterns llc, once went on plenty of soapboxes about how everyone {women} should always be dressed up. that when she was a young adult, she had to take care of multiple children under 5 for a relative who was sick, and SHE had had plenty of time to curl her hair, do her makeup, wear pretty dresses with heels while also taking care of those kids. she went on and on about how SHE didn't even own pants! all she has in her closet are 50s dresses.

SHE MADE AN ENTIRE WEBSITE {now defunct bc ofc} she called "most authentic vintage housewife website on the internet" telling people how to be housewives, that: "Anything you read on this website is not my “opinion” of the 50s, but can be backed up with at least 3-10+ period sources in my collection."

A COLLECTION THAT SHE NEVER CITED ONCE OUTSIDE OF BEAUTY TIPS OR WEIGHT LOSS ARTICLES POST-BABY

lots of right-wing-style talk coming from a {probably} childless woman in her 30s with no formal education {another thing she admitted to}.

then people pushed back. things got heated. she disappeared from online, erased her personal IG account katrinaariana {so naturally, no receipts, and what i would give to have it back, it's now under a different person} and went quiet.

now she's back, with an updated business website, updated IG business account, blah blah.

her first new pattern since returning is for a simple fabric brooch. she says it's a fast and easy way to sew and make something pretty while looking after children.

her next patterns? all similar in ilk. she's coming out with yet another *simple* pattern.

here's where the hypocrisy comes in.

is she still wearing makeup? yes.

does it look caked on and hastily done? yes.

she isn't curling her hair, though. she isn't posing entirely in dresses. she's talking about running around after toddlers all day. she's talking about patterns for the moms in the world.

she's wearing PANTS that she insisted she didn't have.

i think she became a mom.

i think she got a dose of reality: that she's no longer the svelte little twenty-year-old who could stay up doing whatever all night and then run around after little kids all day.

i think she learned that having YOUR OWN KIDS is very different from being a nanny.

is this petty? yes.

am i going to talk about it? yes.

it's niche. it drives me nuts. she thinks she can erase mention of this just by deleting some stuff and insisting that the reason she went quiet was because of "business website difficulties".

i think that's also lies. i was on her website right up to the rebrand. it was working fine as a user.

i CAN tell you that she CLEANED HOUSE before she rebranded. many old posts, all with personal info {likes and dislikes, anything briefly mentioning she has closeness with childhood friends} taken out.

very bernadette banner of her. it's also incredibly irritating that she can't just own up to it.

but i guess that's par for the course.