#YES I KNOW THIS POLL CLOSES LATER PROBABLY WHO CARES

[svtskneecaps]

ok let's do this right

[misotsukiiyeooo]

"Just one more?" Part 3

Pairing:Husband!Father CSC x F! Mother!Reader

A/N: I'M BACKKK!!! After the polled votes came in I immediately started to write lmao! This one will also be a bit longer since it's the last one...or is it? jkkk unless...Enjoy!

Genre: Fluff (Hint of crack)

Word count: 16.6k (Not proofread sry)

Synopsis: After Seungcheol finds out you're pregnant, again, the whole experience has been, tender, lovely, and well....shocking

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

3 Months Later

Everything with Seungcheol has been so perfect. Well, this is your fourth kid but that's what made the experience even better.

He already knew how to help you with your cravings and everything.

Telling the rest of his members was also fun. Of course, Soonyoung, Seokmin, and Joshua ran up to hug you first.

And telling your children was also exciting with Seojun, your oldest son hugging you while Jieun, your second child blabbers on how she's going to dress up the baby. Your youngest, Dohyun just smiles handing you a toy to play with him.

Today, You and Seungcheol are so excited because you can finally find out the sex of your child.

"Babe, we're going to be late!" He's rushing you, clearly he's more excited than you are.

"I'm coming hold on!" You grab your sweater and wave goodbye to your kids and thank Seungkwan once again for watching them.

Seungcheol holds your hand as you walk down the stairs. "I'm only three months, Cheol..." He still treats you as if you were going into labor this instant.

"I know....but we still need to be careful" You look at him while he continues to talk nonsense.

Entering the car, he closes your door; going to the driver's side.

"What do you think the gender is?" You ask him, curiously. "Hm, probably another boy. But whatever the gender is, I'll love them either way." He looks at you fondly.

"You're so cheesy! But I think it'll be a girl because we just had a boy and it seems like a pattern." Seungcheol thinks about it, nodding. "You're probably right, but there's only one way to right out." He starts the car.

As you enter the hospital, you are greeted with warm smiles. "Hi, I had an appointment for an ultrasound today." The nice lady behind the desk looks at you. "Oh yes, Choi Y/n was it? Please fill out these papers and bring them back to me."

She hands you some medical papers and you take them, walking to a seat where Seungcheol's already at.

After filling out the papers you hand them to the lady to take your seat again but before you even sit back down, your nurse calls you in.

"Choi Y/n?" She calls out. "Yes?" You both lock eyes, smiling. "Follow me right this way."

You hold Seungcheol's hand, excited and nervous to find out the sex.

You are seated in the reclined seat while Seungcheol stands beside you. "So you're finally three months! You're here to find out the sex, right?" You nod.

The nurse puts the cold gel on your belly causing you to twitch. You look at the screen above which shows the ultrasound.

"Seems like your baby's doing well." She continues to look at the screen. Her eyes widen, causing you to get scared.

"Is something wrong?" You and Seungcheol both look at her. "I'm afraid I'm not able to say anything. Only the doctor could, and she shall be here shortly." She exits.

You feel anxious, many negative thoughts running through your mind. 'Is the baby sick?' 'Is the baby alright?'. Taking you out of your thoughts, you feel Seugcheol grip your hand.

"Everything's going to be okay, alright?" Just the right words you wanted to hear.

A few seconds later, the doctor enters. "Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Choi. Is everything alright? I just received some information from the nurse who was here, and I want to check it out for myself."

"If you don't mind me asking, what's wrong?" Seungcheol asked, looking quite nervous himself.

The doctor now looks at the screen. "There seems to be two babies in here."

"What!?" You and Seungcheol both say in unison.

"How's that possible? When I came here two weeks ago they said they only saw one?" You're utterly confused.

"You are quite early in your pregnancy so mistakes like this can occur, especially with the babies hiding and such. But yes, look here," She points to the screen. "There's two babies in here, congratulations. You're having twins!"

You're both left shocked, mouths gaped. "I'm not mad...however I'm just in shock." You let out, not knowing whether to be excited or in tears.

"What are their genders?" Seungcheol pitches in. "I'm sorry I almost forgot to even tell you. This one's a girl and the other's a boy." The doctor points at the screen, identifying each baby.

"A boy and a girl?!?" You still can't believe this.

"Yes but if you'll excuse me, I have another patient that needs to be checked. If there are any more questions, you can ask anytime, take care and remember not to stress too much." The doctor exits and you sigh, now facing Seungcheol.

"You did say you wanted another baby" He smiles. "Yeah, but I didn't expect to have babies!" You both look at each other, breaking the silence with laughter.

"I'm a bit scared though...we have to get two of everything and more stress, more waking up at night, more everything! And no wonder I'm so huge at only three months!!" Seungcheol wants to let out maybe even the tiniest bit of laughter but knowing how hormonal you are, he could never do such a thing.

"It's going to be alright baby, you need to remember; that I'm also here. I would never let you do this alone." He holds your hands.

"Hm...You're right, I'm sorry but still, these are two babies!" You let out. "I can't even imagine the boy's faces when I tell them," Seungcheol said.

Arriving home you see Seungkwan and the kids playing together. "You sure you don't want to have your own kids?" You rest your hand on your hip, smiling at him.

"No, most definitely not. I'm good as a fun uncle, not a father." He lets out a chuckle causing you to also laugh.

"Well, I have some news...we're having twins!!" His face has shock written all over it.

"Twins? Twins!!" Seungkwan rushes over to you, hugging you tightly. "Kwan...the twins, remember?"

He made an 'o' shape with his mouth and then let go, apologizing.

"When are you going to tell the rest of the boys?" Seungkwan asks. "Maybe tomorrow? I can't wait to see their faces!"

Seungcheol comes back from the kid's room after putting them to bed while you are talking with Seungkwan. "Well as much as I love to stay and talk with you, I have to get home. Practice is pretty early for us." He looks over at Seungcheol.

"Right, get home safe Seungkwan." Seungcheol waves as you walk Seungkwan out.

After saying your goodbyes' he left; leaving you and Seungcheol alone. "I still can't believe everything that's happened today..." You hug Seungcheol who already has his arms open for you.

"I know, I'm even more excited now that I know it's twins," he says as he kisses your forehead, then your nose, and finally your lips causing you to giggle.

"Should we get ready for bed? You also have a long day tomorrow you know." You said earning a pout from him. "But I wanted to spend my day with you and the kids tomorrow..."

Smiling at his cuteness, you play with his hair, "How about we visit you during practice? We do have to tell the boys about the twins."

"I do like the sound of that." Seungcheol kisses you once again before you head off to bed.

Next Day

You wake up to an empty bed. However, you do see a post-it note on the side dresser.

'Good morning my beautiful wife, I made breakfast for you and the kids ;)'. Smiling at the note, you get off of bed and freshen up for the day until your kids wake up.

As soon as you got out of the bathroom Dohyun, your three-year-old was walking up to you. Slowly but surely.

"Mama, where dada go? I went to room but no one there" He has his hands in a shrugging position while shaking his head. 'Aw this cutie' You thought.

Taking him into your arms and pampering him with kisses you, finally answer. "I'm sorry Dohyun, dada went to work. Do you want to go surprise him later?"

He doesn't let even a second go by before yelling out excitedly, even waking up the rest of the kids. "Dohyun...you woke me up..." Jieun walks out rubbing her eyes while Seojun's just a couple steps behind her.

"I'm sorry kids, but Dad made you guys breakfast! So after eating, we can get dressed to see him at work."

They both look at each other, then you. "Does that mean we can see our uncles too!!" They say in unison happily.

"Yes, you can but, not if you don't eat breakfast." Seojun and Jieun race to the table to eat the food Seungcheol made in no time.

After driving to get some food, you finally make it to Seungcheol's workplace.

You enter the elevator with the kids. "Mommy, I'm so excited to see Uncle Gyu!" Jieun jumps excitedly.

"Hm, and why is that?" You ask. "Because he's so tall and I can pretend like I'm flying!" She puts one arm up as if she were.

"Well, it's a good thing we're here now." You all exit the elevator and they're already used to the place; running to the practice room before you can even get there.

As you approach, all you can hear are indistinct screams of joy.

Entering the practice room you see all the boys surrounding your kids. Seungcheol notices you immediately and grabs the food out of your hands.

"Babe...why didn't you tell me you were downstairs? I could've helped you with the food." He pouts.

"It's okay, Cheol. It wasn't that heavy." Seungcheol still takes the bags.

"Y/n!!" Mingyu runs to hug you but slows down; eyeing you. "Wow..." You laugh at his face.

"I know, right?" You affirm, moving toward him to offer a reassuring hug because he was too hesitant to do so himself.

"Uncle Gyu! Carry me, carry me!!" Jieun wastes no time asking for what she wanted this whole time.

"Ms.Jieun, please keep all arms and legs in the vehicle at all times." Mingyu bends down so Jieun can go on his back. "Prepare for take off!!" As he runs around the practice room with Jieun, you take the opportunity to head towards everyone else.

"Hey guys!" They all look at you, waving, smiling, and coming up to hug you.

"Thanks Y/n for the food!" Soonyoung thanks you while taking another spoonful. "You're welcome!"

Dohyun walks to Wonwoo- calmly sitting on his lap, you've always noticed Wonwoo was his favorite uncle. Probably because they're both calm people.

And Seojun simply talks with his favorite uncle, Seokmin. He knows how crazy Seokmin is; however, he just finds him enduring.

You sit with everyone, patiently waiting to drop the news. "When are you going to tell them?" Seungkwan whispers next to you. You hit him for whispering too loud, "I'll tell them now..."

You eye Seungcheol, signaling to him that you are ready to tell them. "So guys...I actually have some news." They look at you confused on whether it's good or not.

"Is something wrong?" Jeonghan asks. "Well, no. It's just shocking."

"Tell us, tell us!" Chan grows impatient.

"So, I went to my ultrasound yesterday, and turns out...I'm having twins!!" You finally let out.

Many expressions were shown but you can tell they were all happy; just shown in...different ways.

Mingyu, Soonyoung, and Seokmin literally jump like animals.

Minghao, Jihoon, Wonwoo, and Vernon congratulate you with the biggest smiles.

Junhui and Chan both sit down in shock.

And lastly, Jeonghan and Joshua run up to hug you, again.

"I'm so happy for you!!" Joshua tells you. "Oh my gosh! We can make them just like me and Seokmin!" Everyone pauses; looking at a happy Soonyoung.

"Or maybe not." He shuts up completely as we all laugh.

The rest of the day was spent with the kids playing with their uncles while you talked it up with the ones who weren't occupied.

6 Months Later

Everything has been going well with you carrying twins and all.

Your best friend, Seungkwan threw you a baby shower with the help of your parents.

Your kids felt the twins kick, and Seungcheol almost cried.

Seungcheol even decorated a whole room for the twins. And now you're 9 months pregnant and shopping at the mall.

"That dress in that store looks cute! Let's go Cheollie." You hold your back as you walk into the store.

Grabbing the dress in your size, you head to the changing room, Seungcheol steps behind you.

You managed to successfully put on the cozy dress but taking it off was a hassle. "Cheol? I need help."

He comes into the changing room worried. "What happened?" He asks.

"Nothing too serious I just need help taking off my dress." He lets out a sigh of relief and helps you.

As he lifts up the dress a bit you pause.

"Cheol..stop."

He looks at you puzzled, but lets go.

"Either I just peed my pants or I think my water just broke..." Eyes widening he panics. "Your water broke?!?"

You simply nod, panicking yourself. Out of all places, your water broke before; it's never been at a mall.

You knew you were going to give birth at any point just not right now!

"We-we have to go!" You groan at the contractions. You both try to walk out of the store but get stopped by security.

"Ma'am you can't leave without purchasing the dress." He puts an arm out.

"Add it to my tab, I'll call this place later. It's an emergency." Seungcheol holds you by the waist attempting to calm you before you yell at this man. But the guy once again has his arm out.

"That's what they all say. I'm afraid I can't let you leave without paying."

That's it

"My water just broke and it just so happens to be I was trying on this dress! So if you don't want two fucking babies coming out of me in this store I suggest you listen to my husband and let us fucking go!!" The security's eyes widen, looking you up and down and gulping.

"Well, I'm sorry for not reading the room. Please, go on and give birth to your twins.." He finally moves his hand and you and Seungcheol rush out of the place.

Entering the car, your screams only get louder and louder. "We're almost there, Baby. Almost there.." Seungcheol holds your thigh while driving as fast yet safely as possible.

You make it to the hospital and Seungcheol does the talking for you. "My wife is going into labor." He attempts to stay as calm as possible.

"Come right this way." A nurse brings you to a room while you're very much in pain.

Multiple nurses enter now as your contractions are getting close. "Ms. Choi, breathe, just breathe."

Did she really just tell me that?

"What the hell do you think I'm doing?!?" You counter back. Seungcheol smiles at the lady apologizing for you.

The pain was unbearable, those twins were really doing a number on you.

A doctor finally walks in, "Hello, your contractions are pretty close I see, I'm going to need you to push."

Push!?! Can't she see I can barely even breathe?!?

Seungcheol holds your hand as you are preparing to push.

"And 1, 2, 3, push!" Said the doctor. Only screams were heard; everything felt hazy you didn't know if you could even do it.

"You got this, Babe. Just keep pushing." He never once left your side as you continued to push.

"Just one more Ms.Choi-There we go. A beautiful boy!" The sound of the newborn baby crying calmed you in a way that brought you back to your senses.

The nurses took that baby to clean him while you still felt in pain. "One more Ms.Choi, you got this come on."

"I-I I can't. I can't do it" You felt exhausted, this was serious pain.

"Y/n, look at me- Look at me. You need to push; I know you're tired but there's still our daughter in there waiting to be brought into this world. So push!! I'm right here for you." Seungcheol's words help you realize, you have to keep going.

For the sake of your daughter.

You push as hard as you can, taking breaks, tears leaving your eyes, and even sweat dripping from your forehead.

But that didn't stop you from completing your mission.

And with the last push, your daughter was finally out. "Congratulations Ms. Choi, you did well."

You drop your head on the pillow, and tears of happiness and pain keep escaping your eyes. "You did it Y/n...it's all okay now." Seungcheol kisses your forehead and those are the last words you hear before falling into deep sleep.

After some time, you blink your eyes open only for them to be set on Seungcheol holding two babies in his hand. Tears of joy leaving his own eyes.

"Oh look, mommy's up! let's go say hi." He walks up to you so you can see your children.

"They look perfect, right?" He said as you can't even keep your eyes off them.

"I know, they must've gotten that from me." You chuckle at your newly found confidence. "I think they did." He adds on giggling himself.

"What should we name them?"Seungcheol asks you. "Hm..I don't know yet..."

"How about I name one and you name the other?" He proposes. "But they should rhyme, no?" You ask. "If you want them too."

"Well then, what if...she's Jisu and...he's Jiho?" You pitch in, pointing at each kid, waiting for his response.

He nods, "I think it's perfect. Jisu sounds cute like her and Jiho sounds manly like this handsome boy here." He kisses they're cheeks.

"Jisu and Jiho it is."

Reqs are open!!

This adorable divider is by @dollywons !!

Taglist!!

@jjunie-0 @minminghao @honglynights @allieyaaa @bath1lda @black-swan-blog27

[once-upon-an-imagine]

Works in Progress

Okay, this is literally every single work in progress that I currently have on my drafts!

I am the worst at summaries so I put the literal request underneath each one of them 😊 If it's not here, I didn't get the requests, loves so, let me know 😁

I know it's a lot and I really hope to get all of them up soon, it's gonna take me a while, but they are coming! if you'd like to request a preview of one, go ahead 😊 polls might come back in the future since they seem to be working somehow! I'll also be updating my Masterlists

I would like to thank you all again so much for yyour requests, love and patience!

Steve Harrington

Drabble (Untitled) [Mixing 2 requests]

1. wishingtobeforeveryoung1019 - Hey can I get a Steve and reader imagine where she works with Steve and they both like each other but they don’t realize it. They both think each other are way out of each other’s league. Can be Scoops Ahoy or Family Video, whichever you prefer. Fluffy please 2. Anonymous - Could you write a dialogue for Steve Harrington where the reader works at Scoops Ahoy and Steve and Dustin are in the back talking and Steve tells Dustin how much he likes the reader. Steve says "I really love y/n." and the reader opens the little window and says something like "you know I heard that whole conversation, right?" Steve and Dustin are both really shocked and Dustin runs out the back door, and Steve gets really flustered. And it ends with something really fluffy and cute, and they kiss. You totally don't have to write this, it was just an idea I had.

Ongoing Series - How Will I Know

You have walked the halls of Hawkins High unseen. If it wasn’t because Eddie Munson and his Hellfire Club had found you, you probably wouldn’t even have any friends. You knew someone like your all-time crush Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington wouldn’t notice you in a million years. Until you get paired up for a project and he finally learns your name.  

Eddie Munson

One-Shot - Alone Together [Mixing 2 requests]

1. mycobrakai1972 - Hello love, me again 😁 but instead of Charlie I have a Eddie request (even through they closed, so if you have to much just keep it for later or if you don’t want to, just ignore my request). So I thought about the reader is to shy to play with the Hellfire Club but she really wants too. And Eddie is thinking about a campaign that he can play only with her like a D&D date night and that has a romantic twist in it? Love your writhing, and look forward to everything that is coming soon. 💗💗💗 2. lunamadhatter99 - Oohhh let me go with Eddie and a shy one😍 Reader is a shy, quiet one, she's always seen (IF she is seen) at the library and there is where our boy notices her, reading basically a book a day. He's a little shy himself, at first, more because he's worried his reputation would scare her, but one day he tries sitting at the same table and... oh boy, when she smiles at him, he's done. He would start slowly: small talk, little glances in the hallway too, making jokes every now and then. To make her feel comfortable, first thing, always. He would start to flirt, careful not to cross any line, but he made her feel so at ease that she. Flirts. Back! But that only means that he need to try try harder to see that sweet blush he loves so much😏

Ongoing Series - There Are Worse Things I Could Do

[Harrington!Reader] Your senior year was supposed to be the best one in your life. But when Jason broke up with you and turned the entire school against you by spreading rumors about you, you can count with your hand the people that talk to you. Dustin, Mike, Lucas, Max, Nancy, and Robin. But there might be a new one you can add to the list. One you never thought possible. Eddie Munson.

Argyle

One-Shot - A Kind of Magic (might become a drabble)

Anonymous - Heyo! I’m the anon who requested the learning disability imagine! Talking specifics, I’ve got major dyscalculia & a bit of dyslexia. Social anxiety also didn’t help being called on in class, but yea 😅 thanks for asking!! 🥹🥹🥹

Dialogue (Untitled)

Anonymous - So I saw your post about shy!reader x anyone and I was wondering if you could do shy!reader x argyle where he introduces you to his friends in Hawkins (the older teens) and reader doesn't have like the best experience meeting new people so their scared and wants to like not see them because they have social anxiety and like he cuddles then I'm the end ( I always need Argyle cuddles)

One-Shot - Cielito Lindo

Not requested - [Byers!Reader] Argyle is staying with your family when his parents are out of town. You know he’s been feeling down because he has to celebrate his birthday without them. So, you try to do something to cheer him up. (Sequel to Build Me Up, Buttercup)

Ongoing Series - (500 Miles)

[Hopper!Reader] After moving to California with your sister and your new family, you think maybe you’ll finally get some peace. But, of course, you are now driving across the country in your boyfriend’s pizza van, on your way back to Hawkins.

Billy Hargrove

One-Shot - Highway To Hell [Munson!Reader] 

itslaqueefababy - Hey Idk if you’re taking request but since you have writers block, Maybe a Munson!reader x Billy Hargrove? Eddie and Billy hate each other and there’s a lot of drama and tension whenever they get around each other. It’s gets really annoying and out of control that reader eventually gets fed up and upset that they don’t care how she feels. She gives them the cold shoulder and silent treatment then eventually comes up with the idea to runaway on purpose for them to get along by searching for her and all? Something funny and angsty?

One-Shot - A Little Death [Mixing 2 requests] [This might be Hartington!Reader]

1. Anonymous - Where the reader breaks up with Billy because he has been toxic and Billy goes and tries to find love in other women. But he gets frustrated because they don't touch him (physically and mentally) the way the reader always did. He gets angry trying to teach them but none come close to the actual thing until he gets so frustrated that he crawls back to her and tries everything to fix it. 2. Anonymous - “I feel like I’m falling apart.” with Billy Hargrove?

One-Shot - RIP, Love [Munson!Reader]

Anonymous - Where the reader is known to break hearts. Not because its fun for her but she does it to protect herself and the person. She is convinced that whoever gets close to her heart either ends up hurting her or she ends up hurting them so she always ends it by leaving them - ultimately hurting them before they can hurt her. When Billy starts getting interested in her and she suddenly leaves just when he thought things were going good, he doesn't back down to find out why and once he does he makes it his mission to show her that he is there to stay and protect, despite being known for leaving and destroying. 2. Anonymous - since you are taking requests, could i request a Billy fic with the following prompts from the prompt list you talked about in your latest post ? "Wake up. You have to wake up. Please. For me." "Just, please don't leave me." "I don't want you to die for me. I want you to live for me." + "As you begin to fall asleep, you feel a gentle kiss pressed to your temple and a blanket draped over you."

Steddie (Steve Harrington & Eddie Munson)

One-Shot - Running Up That Hill (I keep renaming it 😂)

Anonymous - I know you have many request and this one can definitely wait, but maybe Steddie x cursed!reader?? I need some angst and idk if this would help :/ but I understand if you don’t want to! Maybe one where reader bones end up snapping in the attic? It’s like Instead of max being cursed it’s the reader :)

Drabble - Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now

plk-18 asked - OK first of all i love your work!!! So I don’t know if your requests are still open and I’m really sorry if you already did something like that and I just forgot. But I would love a steddie one-shot, maybe they are not together yet but there is some sexual tension and we have a ‘only-one-bed’ situation👀🤍🤍

One-Shot - A Sunday Kind Of Love

Not requested - For six months, you had been fine with having a secret relationship with Steve Harrington and Eddie Munson. But that changes when a very special day for you approaches and you want them both by your side and for that to happen, a few rules might get broken.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Sirius Black

One-Shot - Out of The Woods [Lupin!Reader] (the request focuses more on Remus and the reader so I put it under Remus for now)

Anonymous - ahh your requests are open!! I love that!! but anyway, I could make a request where Remus has a younger sister who is a year or two below him and she discovers the way the Marauders found to help him deal with his problems during the full moons and decides what she wants to do the same for her brother but Remus doesn't allow it and they just fight about it until one night she decides to follow them anyway but ends up getting hurt because she's not an animagus like the rest of the boys? If you can make her be in an established relationship with Sirius I would appreciate it and sorry if I said something wrong this is not my first language

Drabble (Untitled)

oursilversoul - Heyy❤️ could yo write a Sirius black x slytherin reader where they somehow end up dancing together in the Yule ball with an enemies to lovers undertone? Thank you I love you soo much :)

Ongoing Series - Just Give Me A Reason

[Snape!Reader] Coming back for another year in Hogwarts meant you and your brother were away from your worst tormentor. But when your school tormentor finds out about it, things are about to change and you are not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. (Warning: mentions of abuse)

Remus Lupin

Dialogue (Untitled)

Anonymous - Hiii i don’t know if u are writing now but i’d love to read your take on remus being unconscious for a prolonged amount of time after transformation and fem!reader taking care of him and talking to him. fast forward to him waking up and confessing he heard everything she said while he was sleeping. i just love the way you write and it would be fun to read it!!

Drabble (Untitled for now)

2. Anonymous - HI! Could you do the prompt “We’ve been by each other’s sides for years, you think I’m gonna leave now?” With Remus Lupin where they're still in school and someone really close to the reader (like someone in their immediate family) died and the reader is miserable and asks Remus not to leave her too? Btw your work is amazing!

Ongoing Series - Too Good At Goodbyes

Twelve years ago, Lily and James Potter were brutally murdered. Twelve years ago, Sirius Black was sent to Azkaban for a crime he did not commit. Twelve years ago Remus Lupin left you to take care of a one-year-old Harry on your own. Twelve years ago Severus Snape was the only person who was there for you. And now, Remus is back to teach at Hogwarts with you, as Harry courses his third year, and Sirius Black escaped Azkaban.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Charlie Weasley

She Is Love (One-Shot) [Mixing 2 requests]

1. Anonymous - something about a shy reader, who's friends with the twins. Charlie and the reader have a crush on each other and he loves to see her blush and get all nervous, so it's like his mission to make her blush a lot, she kinda likes it though. But when someone else does try to tease the reader, not in a comfortable way, unfortunately, Charlie comes to the rescue and later on confesses his feelings. 2. Anonymous - I am begging for Charlie kissing shy!reader for the first time please

One-Shot - I'm Yours [Mixing 2 requests]

1. Anonymous - One where he gets jealous because of how close you’ve always been to Fred and George, even though Charlie really has nothing to worry about. 2. Anonymous - I have a dialogue request for Charlie Weasley and “Pay attention to me” where maybe the reader is friends with the twins and she’s having a ‘situation’ with charlie that no one knows about?

Drabble (Untitled)

Anonymous - Hi friend! Can I interest you in a dialog prompt for Charlie Weasley and “I’m sorry but I love you and I’m not going anywhere?”

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Evan Buckley

Drabble or One-Shot (Untitled)

Anonymous - Could I request a Buck x plussize reader? One where someone says something mean about the reader and buck defends her and comforts her after? Idk I just feel like I need some buck fluff in my life 😂

Drabble or One-Shot - Late Night Talking

Anonymous - Can you write a Buck x reader fic where they both work at the 118 and are really good friends. They both have a crush on each other. One night reader comes to visit him at his apartment because she doesn't want to go home(she still lives with her parents and they have a argument or something) Buck is happy to see her but also knows that something is wrong. They spend some time together and maybe there is a love confession at the end.

Eddie Diaz

Drabble or One-Shot - Cramps

Anonymous - One being eddie and the reader are going about they're day. Reader feels unwell but thinks nothing of it until they get back from a call/at the end of one and reader has appendicitis so they rush her to the hospital? Eddie is there when she wakes up and looks after her.

Drabble or One-Shot - Proposal

Anonymous - eddie is planning to propose to reader and he's all fluffy and cute about it?? Maybe gets Chris involved and the team are congratulating them? All fluffy and cute again.

[aniron48]

Love Letters - Day 3

Omg, that last VOTE, you guys. ::Takes a drag of an imaginary cigarette:: You have no idea how frantically I was drafting a contingency conference call scene to try to cover a potential tie. But not today, chaos muppets. Not today.

Anyway, welcome to Day 3 of Love Letters, a 00q choose your own adventure! If you're joining for the first time, you can catch up here: Day 1 Day 2

As a reminder, there will be a post around this time (9pmish EST) every night through 2/14. Day 3 starts below the cut!

In fact, he might need to talk to Felix.

“James,” Felix said, answering the phone the following morning. “To what do I owe the singular pleasure of you waking me up an hour before my alarm goes off?”

Bond looked at his watch. “It’s 6:00 there.”

“Exactly.” There was a rustling sound as Felix got out of bed. “Espera un momento, mi cielo, ya regreso.”

“If you have company, Felix, I can phone you again later.”

“No, no, I’m up. I can give you five minutes.”

“Is that what she—“

“James, I will hang up on your ass.”

“Fine, all right, hang on. Look, it’s ah—it’s a bit personal.”

“Personal, huh? Don’t you have an entire medical unit for that sort of thing?”

“Christ, Felix, thank you for the vote of confidence. No, it’s nothing like that. I wanted to ask—let’s say, hypothetically, that you wanted to send a love letter to someone who had never received one before. Someone who didn’t seem to think they deserved one, despite the fact that they deserve one more than anyone you know. And suppose you wanted to remedy that. Romantically. What would you say to them?”

“Hypothetically.”

“Yes, obviously. Hypothetically.”

“Love letters,” Felix mused. “Brings back some memories. Look, if you really want my opinion, I think it comes down to honesty. You and me—we’re professional bullshitters, my friend. And anyone who loves us enough to stick around is going to know we’re bullshitters. ‘Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day’ and that sort of flowery shit is for people who make an honest living. But giving the person you care about something true—something real—that’s the good stuff. Be honest about why you love him and why it’s important to you that he know. It is a ‘him,’ right? Because if it’s not Q, I’ll shoot you and throw your body in an Amsterdam canal with all the goddamn stolen bikes.”

“That’s oddly specific, Felix.”

“Yeah, well, two guesses where I just went on vacation. And another two guesses what happened to my fucking bike.”

“Noted. But for the record, yes, it’s Q.”

“Good. You two deserve each other. Be good to him. I like that snarky little shit.”

He could do honesty easily enough, Bond thought as he hung up the phone. Q already knew more true things about Bond than anyone else living, which, admittedly, was not something Bond had ever let himself examine too closely. But he needed more than honesty to work with, if he was going to write Q a love letter that rivaled Captain Wentworth’s. Significantly more. 

**Partial authorial credit for this section goes to the entire sleeve of Girl Scout cookies I stress-ate while waiting for the poll to close! 😘

[delimeful]

in sickness and in health (2)

this fic was patron picked to be published by a 24 hour poll! hope you enjoy! :)

warnings: fear, fairly bad illness, murder mentions, crying, remus saying some remus things

-

The next morning, after a few measly hours of sleep, Virgil poked his head out of one of the upper boltholes in his human’s bedroom and found him still in the same position, the sheets damp with sweat around him.

Another check in a couple hours later found much the same.

And another.

And then night had fallen, and still his human hadn’t moved, looked perhaps even worse than before. Even more galling, nobody else had come over to check on him.

It was to be expected, he knew. He’d seen the human collapse and sleep a day or two away after one of his week-long at-home work sessions; it was only natural that his many friends assumed this was the same sort of scenario.

Except it wasn’t. And now his stupid human was too unconscious to even contact anyone. Virgil dragged his hands over his face, bemoaning the situation and humans and even the world in general.

He peeked down over the ledge, studying what he could see of the burns. Another application couldn’t hurt. At the very least, his parents hadn’t raised him to leave a job half-done.

His human would wake up soon, he told himself sternly as he made the trek over to the nightstand. He paused, and shook his head. There was no point in avoiding using names anymore. He was literally risking his life to go tend to the human’s wounds— he was much more than attached, at this point.

Patton would wake up soon, he told himself as he unscrewed the ointment tube’s cap. It almost sounded a little more believable like that.

Unfortunately, it ended up being truer than he would have liked.

He was halfway done with the right hand when the general unease he wore around like a second skin suddenly spiked into outright fear. He went still, straining all his senses.

There— it was the silence that was setting him off. The constant backdrop of low, raspy breathing had suddenly gone completely quiet.

As if someone was holding their breath.

Slowly, Virgil turned to confirm what his instincts were already telling him, and met the gaze of a pair of huge brown eyes.

Despite himself, he went frozen. Knowing how large humans were was one thing, but being seen by one? It had never happened to him before, and he felt utterly pinned under the stare.

(His sleeves were rolled up. Could the human see the markings on his body? Other borrowers recognizing Virgil as a part of that group was bad enough, but a human-- A human could do so much worse.)

Patton let out a little whoosh of air, as though deciding that he didn’t have to hold his breath to avoid disturbing him anymore. “Um, hi.”

His voice, even at an almost-whisper, was crackly and rough, and it made Virgil jerk slightly, his mind desperately trying to convince his locked up body to bolt already.

Patton’s hand twitched a little in response to the motion, and Virgil went stone-still again. He was standing right next to the curve of the hand, had unwittingly practically done everything but climb into the human’s palm himself. In this position, he had no doubt that in a race between him and Patton’s reflexes, he would lose.

But the human hadn’t grabbed yet. The longer it stayed that way, the better.

“Didn’t mean to startle you,” Patton mumbled apologetically. His eyes were a little glazed over; he probably thought he was dreaming. Good for Future Virgil, bad for Present Virgil. “You takin’ care of me?”

Virgil let the silence stretch, and then nodded a little when it was clear Patton was waiting for an answer. There was no point in denying it; he’d been caught red-handed. Ointment-handed. Whatever.

“Thanks,” Patton replied, face scrunching up into a weak grin. “I guess a little first aid is just what I needed.”

Not even a raging fever could hold back the puns, it seemed. Virgil narrowly avoided snorting, a return jab about Patton being a big pain on the tip of his tongue.

Abruptly, though, the hand was curling around him, sending his pulse racing as his route of escape was cut off.

Horrific ways this could end ran through his mind one after another; The human was nearly out of his head with fever, all he had to do was misjudge his strength even a little and Virgil would snap—

Everything went still again. Virgil struggled to slow his breathing, gaze darting back and forth like a cornered mouse. Patton’s hand had curled around him, pressing just slightly on his arms without actually trying to lift him. He was just sort of... holding him.

“Y’okay?” Patton murmured, and his thumb (thankfully ointment-free) gently patted his shoulder. “It’s justa’ thank you hug.”

On cue, his almost-grip loosened, hand remaining half-cupped around him but open enough that he could easily step out. Testingly, he stepped forward once, twice, always watching Patton’s face like a hawk as he did.

Patton blinked slowly at him, apparently completely unfazed by Virgil performing the world’s slowest escape.

It wasn’t until he was nearly to the edge of the bed that Patton stirred, shuffling his shoulder a bit and turning his head a bit farther to keep watching him.

“Leavin’?” he asked, looking almost a little worried. Virgil couldn’t imagine why; if anyone had the right to be worried here, it was him.

Still, he was finally close enough to his hook that he could definitely make it if Patton even twitched wrong toward him, so he took a deep breath and nodded, waiting to see how the human would react.

“‘Kay, be safe,” Patton offered, his cheek smushed against his pillow. His eyes were already half-lidded, apparently already preparing to head back to sleep now that there weren’t any convenient borrowers around to scare the life out of.

It couldn’t be that easy. Could it?

Virgil kept checking over his shoulder as he grabbed his rope, but Patton’s attention had already strayed, and as he descended, the human’s breathing returned to that familiar, sleep-slow cadence.

He only barely managed to make it back into the walls before a hysterical laugh bubbled up from his chest. He slid down to a sitting position, trying to get his breathing under control. He’d been seen, he’d have to pack up everything he’d made and leave to face the treacherous elements again--

… Except. Except Patton hadn’t grabbed him. That was no promise of safety, but… really, he had barely seemed fazed at all by the presence of a tiny person in his space. Unnaturally so, for a human. Virgil knew well how a ravaging sickness could make anyone less than keen, leave their memory foggy. There was every possibility that that was the case here.

And if it was… Virgil didn’t have to move. He could observe Patton once he got better, stay discreet and make sure that his existence was dismissed as nothing more than a fever dream.

It was a risk, but… wasn’t every choice a borrower made risky?

(He was tired of leaving homes behind.)

---

There was one problem with his plan: it required Patton to get better.

Watching the human now, it seemed that he was intent on doing anything but that. Virgil scowled down at the bed from his check-in shelf, trying to shove down the worry at the sight of Patton twisting and turning in the sheets, iller than ever.

It seemed his moment of brief lucidity (if it could be called that) hadn’t lasted. He’d spent over a day in bed, only getting worse.

Virgil was getting well and truly worried.

(He didn’t know how long it took humans to recover, but he had an extensive frame of reference for how long it took humans to succumb to sickness.)

He’d taken to pacing indecisively back and forth at his latest check in, thousands of potential options and their terrible outcomes running through his head, when a low noise caught his ear.

Patton was crying, little hitching sobs that came out rough and crackly, blinking harshly as he stared up at the ceiling.

Virgil couldn’t tell why; it could’ve been a nightmare, physical pain, or just the helplessness of being so terribly sick. He gripped the edge of the shelf he was hiding on, biting his lip harshly.

If he called out, would it help? Would Patton listen? Would he remember, later?

Before he could try, the creak of bedsprings drew his eyes back to the human, who was twisting onto his side, reaching for the bedside table. Where his phone was.

“Yes,” Virgil whispered, watching the human strain to reach just a little further. “Come on, come on…”

Patton’s hand grabbed at the edge of the phone, so close to being able to finally get the help he needed— and it fell right through his fingers, his grip too weak to hang onto it.

It was as though their spirits plummeted right along with the phone, landing with a muffled thud on the bedroom floor. Patton let out another half-sigh, half-sob, and settled back onto the bed, exhausted from even that small expenditure of energy. Virgil’s lip began to bleed from how hard he was biting it.

Within moments, the room was quiet again, Patton returning to that hazy unconsciousness.

By then, Virgil had already made his choice.

(It was almost poetic. What better way to spit in the face of his upbringing than to save a human?)

He made his way through the walls in record time, finally able to use the pent up energy he’d accumulated from all that time helplessly watching.

Once he got to the floor, he paused for only a moment to listen to the rhythmic breathing above before darting over to the phone, lying in the shadow of the bed. He flipped it over and pressed the button, the screen lighting up with a picture of a cat.

“Isn’t he allergic?” Virgil muttered, and then shook his head, swiping through to the home screen. Luckily, Patton didn’t seem to have any locks, though Virgil hated to imagine how that trust could be abused.

He recognized the old phone shape on one of the icons easily enough, and squinted at the contact list for a long moment before finding the one with a tiny picture of someone he recognized: Patton’s loud friend, the one who came over for movie nights when they were both free (a rare occurrence).

“Roman”’s number was pressed immediately, and it was only as the phone began to ring that Virgil realized he had not thought this plan through.

The phone rang once, twice, and just as he thought it would ring out and he’d be able to think of a plan-- “Patton! Perfect timing!”

He jerked away from the tinny voice, casting a glance up at the bed where Patton laid. If this was enough to rouse him, even just enough to talk, this situation would resolve itself.

“...Patton? Hellooo?”

The human above didn’t even twitch at his friend’s call.

“Ooh, did you get a booty call from Daddy Dearest?” another voice asked, gleeful and a little bit fainter than the first.

“What-- it’s buttdial, I know you know how that sounds, Remus!” There was the sound of tussling for a moment, and then Roman’s voice piped back up, sounding strained. “Okay, Pat, call back later, I guess? Remus, lemme go--”

The line went dead.

Virgil smacked the screen harshly, cursing the fact that Patton’s friends were apparently prone to nonsense and not nearly as concerned as they should be about the situation, as little as they knew about it. He glanced up at his Human again, brow furrowed.

No speaking, no texts, no physical evidence. How could he get their attention without giving himself away?

He leaned forward and pressed the call button again.

“Uh… Patton?” There was a long pause, and then a nervous laugh. “Jeez, what is he up to?”

Virgil hung up, and called again.

“What the heckity heck--”

Virgil hung up, and called again.

“Patton, are you there?”

“Maybe there’s a serial killer in his house and he can’t pipe up or they’ll get to his windpipes!” the second voice, presumably “Remus”, chimed in.

“Shut up, that’s not it!” There was an uncertain pause. “Patton, that’s not it, right? C’mon, Padre, you’re freaking me out worse than the Outage Incident of ‘09.”

Virgil hung up, and called again, ignoring the phone’s buzzing as worried texts began to filter in.

“Something’s wrong. If his phone was accidentally calling me from his pocket, he’d be replying to my texts.”

Yes! Virgil held his breath, letting the thick silence hang in the air.

“Patton, are you there? Do you need help? Give me some sort of signal,” Roman pleaded, and Virgil leaned back, desperately searching his memory for a sign that would mean something to Roman.

There was something he’d overheard, lurking in nearby wall corridors during one of their sleepovers. Roman had been waxing poetic about effective storytelling.

“That’s the thing about repetition,” he’d said. “Like that saying! Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, but three times? That’s a pattern. And patterns have meaning!”

Virgil had rolled his eyes at the time. The advice didn’t hold true for borrowers, who avoided patterns like the plague. One slip up was all it took to have to uproot his whole life or worse, after all.

Now, though, he latched onto the memory with both hands.

Two witnesses to this were two too many, but so long as they couldn’t prove anything… he pulled out his hook and carefully tapped the side of the phone, producing three distinct, dull clinks.

There was a clutter of alarmed arguing on the other end, and Virgil hurriedly smacked the red ‘end call’ button once more, his nerves frayed.

After a moment, more texts popped up.

Roman!!! ❤️👑✨: patton, i know you wouldnt pull a prank like this

Roman!!! ❤️👑✨: ur spare key is still under the kitten statue, right?

Roman!!! ❤️👑✨: im coming over

Virgil sank back on his heels, letting out a long sigh of relief. Thank goodness he knew how to read.

After another moment of shaky decompression, he hurried back into the walls, returning to his former vantage point on the shelf.

The phone lit up a few more times, the cheery ringtone of an attempted call still not quite enough to bring Patton back to awareness. Virgil resisted the urge to go climb up on a windowsill, knowing that it was far too risky, and he wouldn’t be able to recognize any human vehicles anyhow.

Finally, finally, there was the sound of a key rattling in the front door’s lock. Virgil ducked back behind a novelty bobblehead as voices spilled into the house, growing more alarmed once they reached the kitchen. Virgil remembered belatedly that the mess from Patton’s disastrous attempt to make cookies was still there.

“Patton!” Roman appeared at the doorway, eyes fixed on the bedridden form of his friend. He rushed over, pressing a wrist to his forehead. “You’re burning up…”

With some careful maneuvering, he managed to lift Patton from the bed in a bridal carry, calling for Remus to get the door.

And then they were gone, off to the human version of a sickbay.

Virgil sprawled back, letting all the tension leave him, his heart still racing from his part in it all.

Now, all he had to do was wait.

[captain-jensen]

Tommy Shelby HC

Headcanon of being the Shelby Company LTD receptionist and Tommy slowly falls for you

Warnings:18+, it’s slightly smutty, some swearing.

Authors Note: I decided to make this a to be continued because honestly this totally ran from me and before I knew it I was imagining Tommy smut. So I’m gonna write an actual imagine based on this HC. I’ll link it after it’s done.

Part 2!!

Tommy hires you after watching you get rejected as a barmaid at the Garrison 

You knew the reputation of the Shelbys

You’ve also heard stories of the past women Tommy has had for receptionists

You weren’t in a position where you could turn down the chance though

In the first few weeks you feel people’s eyes following you around the office

You knew what they were thinking when you walked in the first day to become Tommy’s personal receptionist

You couldn’t walk into Tommy’s office with notices without at least 2 people studying you

One thing you weren’t paying attention to though was the way Tommy’s eyes would follow you around while you gather papers

Or the way he would study you while you gave him the run down on what specific tasks or people needed his attention that day. 

He never felt overwhelmed when you would talk to him though. There was something calming about the way you would explain things to him

Whenever he was in the office he would make sure you took your breaks at the right times, always making sure you ate

“Can’t have ya slowing down at work can I eh?” He would say as an excuse to make sure you were well rested and taken care of.

You always thought he did it because that’s what you did for him. Making sure to bring him a sandwich and some soup if you had noticed that he hadn’t left his office in hours. 

He didn’t even have to ask. You would just waltz into his office, carrying plates of food and some tea, placing it on his desk and walking out.

“Mr. Shelby, I’ll give you your whiskey back after you eat something” you said to him one day, walking away with his decanter of alcohol. 

You two got into a spat that day because he thought you were overstepping your bounds. 

You got into another spat a few days later after he noticed and said something about the hickeys on your neck. You said he was overstepping his bounds. 

After that you started to feel his eyes on you everyday

You thought he was always judging you

Instead he just couldn’t help himself

He always found himself enamoured with you 

Eventually you would start holding his stare, trying to be just as intimidating him

But failing of course

His icy blue eyes would never be the first to move, always making you stop dead in your tracks.

You started to find yourself thinking about him when you weren’t at work

Wondering if he’d had anything that day besides whiskey and cigarettes. 

But you were determined to not fall into the pit of Tommy Shelby

Without you knowing though, you and Tommy were slowly being curled into each others grasps

One night, as you were getting to leave, you watch Polly storm out of his office

Tommy’s voice calls out to you not long after

You walk into the office and see Tommy sitting at his table in the middle of the room with his head resting on one hand

“Yes Tommy” he insisted very early on that you call him Tommy instead of Mr. Shelby

“Sit down” he demands in a monotonous voice

You watch him carefully as you sit, searching for any trace of anger or annoyance on his face

As usual, his face was stony, but there was a hint of something in his eyes that you couldn’t place 

“Have a drink with me” He says, pouring some whiskey into a glass in front of you

“Is something wrong?” You ask

“Why do you ask?” He says slightly narrowing his eyes at you

“Well it’s just that you don’t ever ask for my company” You point out

“I want to start now” He states very matter of factly

After that night it would be goddamn lie if you were to say that Tommy Shelby didn’t occupy your mind at least 90% of the time. 

You even dreamt of him. 

You dreamt of feeling his strong hands moving over your body, and looking into his eyes as he made you come undone.

One day you have to be snapped out of a day dream as you see Tommy across the room talking to some of the men about the betting shop

Polly (who you’ve grown somewhat close to) just looks at you with a sly and knowing smile as you turn away blushing.

Polly is not as forgiving though when she has to do the same thing to Tommy just an hour later

“Leave her alone Tommy. She’s not just one of your receptionist whores. Also, she’s the best receptionist we’ve had here for a while, we don’t need you scaring her away with your cock, or getting her pregnant” she gives her nephew a small talking to

“Alright Poll, that’s enough” He gives his rebuttal through a cloud of cigarette smoke.

He couldn’t help himself though

As he helps you into your coat one night after work, he lets his hands linger on your body just a touch too long

He notices you don’t pull away, but instead look flustered

“What do ya say we go for a drink tonight Y/N? We could both probably use one” he asks

You notice that he actually ASKS you this time. So of course you say yes.

Walking to the Garrison he offers you his arm like a true gentleman

It’s hard to ignore some of the glances you get as you walk down the dirty Small Heath streets

���Tommy, people are staring”

“You’ll get used to it” he responds

He speaks so naturally like this will be an ongoing thing

Walking into the snug in The Garrison you’re a little disappointed when you see John and Arthur already sitting at the table.

“Tommy! We were wondering how long it was gonna take before you brought Y/N here with ya. Hello darling, you look gorgeous” Arthur says to you, clearly already buzzed. 

John gives a little chuckle at Arthur before giving you once-over and little nod. (It was your first time formally meeting him)

After a few drinks you’re laughing at stories coming from Arthur and John while Tommy sits quietly by your side watching you interact so easily with his brothers.

Walking out of the bar Tommy offers to walk you home before being whistled at by Arthur in the distance.

Tommy gives them a stiff wave as he offers his arm to you again

You walk down the streets in a comfortable silence, taking in the fresh air around you and just enjoying being in his company. 

When you reach your doorstep you turn to Tommy and thank him for the wonderful night.

As he stares you down you feel your cheeks heat up in the cool night air. 

“Do you have any whiskey up there Y/N?” Tommy asks, nodding towards your apartment with his head.

“Only scotch I’m afraid. No irish.” you respond simply, knowing his preference.

Tommy tuts at you “Y/N, Y/N, Y/N. You work for Tommy Shelby and only have scotch?” He asks in an almost humorous tone. 

As humorous as he can get

“Well to be frank, I’ve never expected to have Tommy Shelby in my home” you reply honestly. 

“And why not?” Tommy asks with an eyebrow quirked and a mischievous glint in his eye. 

Returning his look, you turn to unlock your door.

TO BE CONTINUED 

[illfoandillfie]

A Different Kind of Education: V Is For Vanilla (Chapter 1)

Pairing: Professor!Roger Taylor x Fem!Reader

Summery: After being broken up with for not being kinky enough, Reader seeks out her professor to give her some private tutoring so she can win her boyfriend back.

Warnings: Modern AU, smut (18+), slow burn romance, light dom/sub dynamics, light dom!roger and sub!reader, professor x student sex, protected sex, vaginal fingering, light breast/nipple play, nipple sucking, light biting, i think thats it, honestly this chapter is (as the title says) pretty vanilla. But things will get more intense in later chapters. 

Words: 7,128

A/N: ahhhhhh it’s finally here. This professor Rog idea has been kicking around my head for months now and finally I’m actually doing something about it lmao

This series is going to be LONG (like in my plan it’s 15 chapters) because I have So Many kinks I want to squeeze into it. Some were chosen by me and some were chosen by everyone who voted in the poll I put up a few weeks ago and i am seriously so excited about what’s coming.

Smut scenes in this and all future chapters will be marked with stars so that if there is a kink you’d like to avoid you can skip over it and still enjoy the rest of the series. 

Also, I know the chapter title doesn’t super make sense since he’s a university bio sciences professor which doesn’t have a lot to do with the alphabet but 🤷‍♀️ that was the working chapter title and it kind of stuck. Plus, ya’ll know I love chapter titles that have a theme lmao. Anyway, no more stalling. Enjoy the filth and start preparing yourselves for it to get so much filthier.

(the ultimate hot professor rog moment tbh)

@atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama​​ @deakyclicks​​ @jennyggggrrr​​ @drowseoftaylor​​ @hannafuckingsucks​​ @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming​​ @queenmylovely​​ @ilovequeenmorethanyou​​ @johndeaconshands​​ @borhapbois​​ @stardust-galaxies​​ @cherries-n-rocknroll​​ @rogersslave​​ @scorpiogemini  

His office door was open when you got there which didn’t give you much time to hesitate or rethink your decision to ask your Professor for help. He would have seen you approaching or stalling in the doorway and invited you in anyway to query you about your reasons for being there. So, instead, you raised your fist and rapped a pattern on the door frame with your knuckles. “Professor Taylor? Can I have a word?” “Miss Y/L/N,” he seemed surprised to see you, his eyes widening behind his spectacles, “come in. What can I help you with?” You closed the door behind you and took a seat, fidgeting with your fingers as you tried to remember how you’d planned to broach the subject. Professor Taylor – Roger, as you’d been told you could call him – waited patiently. “It’s tricky, Professor. Umm, see, well um,” “Is this something to do with the coursework? If you’re worried about the last assignment, you don’t need to be. It was really good, what you handed in.” “Really?” “Mmhmm. I was going to give you all feedback next week but if it’ll help put your mind at ease I can show you the comments I have for you early,” You were half a second away from asking to see them when you remembered that wasn’t what you’d come to ask about, “A-actually that’s okay Professor.” “Oh? So was it something else you wanted? I know that this Masters course is more work than previous classes you’ve had with me but you seem to be keeping on top of it all. I’m very impressed by what you’ve accomplished so far.” “Thank you Professor, but, um, that’s not really what I’m here about,” “No?” He leaned forward resting his chin on his hands, “You know, there’s no need to be nervous about talking to me, I’m not going to fail you,” he chuckled as he sat up straight again, clearly trying to lighten the mood though his expression became more serious as he said, “if you’re having trouble with something, or someone, please tell me and I will do what I can to help, whether it’s pointing you in the direction of someone more able to support you or talking to people on your behalf.” You nodded, feeling marginally calmer though still nervous, “I was actually hoping for some private tutoring,” “Oh? Well if you’d like to put your name down as a tutor I have a form here somewhere, if you fill it out I can pass it on and have your name added to the database,” Roger rifled through a stack of papers on his desk, only stopping when you spoke again. “No, not, uh, not tutoring work. I more meant tutoring from you. In an area that this Uni doesn’t provide classes in,” “Miss Y/L/N I’m going to have to ask you to explain because I’m not quite sure what you’re after,” You took a breath and resisted the urge to speak to the floor, “My boyfriend dumped me last week.” “I’m sorry to hear that but I don’t see how-” “He dumped me because apparently I’m not kinky enough. I don’t know, he always wanted me to be super obedient in the bedroom but I never really understood it.” Roger shifted in his seat, “Miss Y/L/N I don’t think this is app-” “I want someone to explain it all to me, teach me how to be what he wants so I can get him back. If I can show him that I can learn, that I can submit in the way he expects, then we won’t have to break up. I love him and I’d do anything to get him back and I’ve been thinking about it and I think you’re the best person to teach me.” “I’m not sure I understand why you would come to me with this. I am very sorry to hear you’re dealing with that but it’s not really appropriate for me to be discussing such matters with my student.” “Just…” you held your hand up to try and stop him from standing and opening the door for you, “You must realise that you have a, um, a reputation.” Roger was taken aback by that, throwing you a confused expression as he settled back into his seat. “Surely you’ve heard the rumours about you. About what you like to get up to with women.” “I can assure you I haven’t,” “Seriously? Everyone talks about it. I mean part of it is probably just because you’ve got that whole DILF thing working for you so like half the students here have crushes on you. But then you throw in the gossip about how you like to tie women up and all the rest of it,” Roger closed his eyes as if he couldn’t quite keep up with everything you’d just said, “How- I mean, those rumours have no bearing on- on anything and they aren’t even- what I mean to say is-” “Professor, it’s okay. It’s just gossip, nothing serious in it. But if you do like that sort of thing, I could really use your help. I won’t tell anyone, all I want is my boyfriend back,” Roger pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, “This is insane, what you’re asking is insane.” “No it’s not,” “Okay, lets, Miss Y/L/N, just for a moment, let’s imagine that, hypothetically, I say yes to this. What then?” “Well, I’d expect we’d meet up once or twice a week, you’d teach me the basics of kink, anything you thought I should know. Then in four months’ time I can talk to Dylan and show him what I’ve learnt and he’ll take me back.” “Why four months?” “Oh, we’re pretty much guaranteed to see each other then. Two of our mutual friends are getting married and we’ll both be at the wedding. So will you do it?” “Miss Y/L/N, I don’t know that this is a good idea,” “Why not?” “Well our ages for one thing,” “So what? You’re mature and experienced and that’s what I need. Plus, surely having someone half your age throw herself at you is a bonus.” He smiled slightly, “All the same, it’s wrong. I’m your teacher.” “Exactly, who better to teach me?” “The ethics of this- and the rules of this university. If anyone found out I’d lose my job, you’d lose your place at this school so you wouldn’t get to complete your degree. Not to mention I’m sure you have family and friends who would chop my bollocks off before they ran me out of town.” “It’s not like I’m underage, I’m doing a bloody Masters. And no one would find out. We can meet in secret.” “It’s still so risky, Ms Y/L/N,” “Look, Professor, I wouldn’t tell anyone, you won’t tell anyone. As long as we’re careful about when and where we meet no one will find out. Please, Professor. I need this,” you thought you could see his resolve cracking but decided to give him a final push, “But if you really don’t want to then I’ll find someone else. I’m sure I can meet someone online. Fetlife? That’s a website for this kind of thing, right?” “Fine, I’ll do it.” He said suddenly, “But we do it my way. And certainly not on campus.” “Okay,” “Are you free tonight?” “You wanna get right into it?” “I want to discuss this further, off campus, to set some ground rules, and I think we’ll both be more comfortable discussing it over dinner.” “Dinner? Like a date?” “A business deal. Miss Y/L/N, if you can’t take this seriously,” “I can, I promise. Dinner where?” “Well, public places are out of the question. So you can come over to my house. Be there by Seven and make sure no one knows. Here’s the address,” “Thank you Professor,” Roger grunted as he scrawled his address on a scrap of paper, holding it out to you, “Go, out of my office before I come to my senses,” You nodded and scurried off, taking heart from the bemused tone behind his snippy words. In a matter of a few short months you’d be able to put this breakup behind you and show Dylan just how much he meant to you.

A few minutes before seven o’clock you rang Roger’s door bell, looking around at the long driveway and the tidy garden beds at the front of the house as you waited. He opened the door quickly and hurried you inside glancing around the front yard as if someone were spying on him. “I brought wine,” you said, holding the bottle out, “You’ve got a nice place,” “You sound surprised,” he said as he took your jacket from you and hung it on a coat rack to the side of the entrance before taking the wine with a gracious nod and examining the label, “Y’know being a university professor doesn’t actually pay too badly.” “Yeah but this place is massive,” He chucked, “I inherited a little from my Nan and Pop and then there was the album. That was enough to buy this place.” “Album?” “Oh, I was in a band in my youth, one mildly successful album and a couple of writing credits on the singles set me up nicely. Not nicely enough to retire on but still.” He shrugged as he led you through his sizeable house, up a set of stairs and towards the back balcony, “Plus, this place didn’t seem so big when I was sharing it with my ex-wife and our kids. Uhh, but that’s not what we’re here to discuss. Now, make yourself comfortable out here and I’ll just go check on the food.” You nodded, still trying to wrap your head around the sheer number of rooms and hallways you’d passed as well as the fact that your old Biology professor had once been in a band. It was hard considering you’d only ever seen him presenting lectures to an audience of tired and often hungover students but you supposed he did have a kind of magnetism that would have been at home on a stage. Still, you’d have liked to see pictures.  

Roger returned a few moments later with two plates of food, a couple of wine glasses tucked in the crook of his arm. You quickly reached to relieve him of something, before one of the glasses could shatter and put an end to all your plans. Though perhaps a broken glass would have helped break the ice. It wasn’t the most comfortable dinner you ever had. You found it hard to swallow, hard to sit still, torn between wanting to jump right to the main topic and wanting to let Roger bring it up in his own time. The last thing you wanted was to come across as just trying to get a leg over the hottest professor on campus as if for a dare or a joke. Him retracting his agreement was a very close second last. Instead, you gulped down your drink and tried to focus on the reasonably nice meal Roger had prepared for you. Finally, after watching you top up your glass for the third time, he put you out of your misery. “Why me?” “What?” “Why did you approach me with this idea of…tutoring?” “Like I said before, the rumours abo-” “Okay but there must have been something beyond that. There could have been rumours about any staff member. If the school gossip had said Professor Richardson had a sex dungeon where he tied up women and spanked them, would you have approached him?” “So you have heard the rumours,” “Of course I have. Answer the question,” You stalled by taking another drink, though only a sip that time, “No, I wouldn’t have.” “So, why me?” “You’re hot?” Roger gave you a look you’d seen in the classroom – his stop fucking around look, usually reserved for first years who still treated dissection and cadavers as a joke. You shrugged, “You’re one of the best teachers I ever had. You always said we could come to you with any problems we were having and whenever I took you up on that offer to go over the coursework you were encouraging and supportive and knew how to push me in the right direction without giving me all the answers. I guess I felt like I could trust you. Like you’d take me seriously or at least hear me out before shutting the door in my face. And if the rumours happened to be false then you seemed like the sort of person who wouldn’t be offended by them or my proposition.” Roger smiled to himself, but it was only for a few brief seconds and then his professional demeanour was back in place, “Alright, well, I’m listening now so why don’t you tell me about this ex and the sort of things he requested of you. And then I’ll decide whether to kick you off my property or not.” There was a twinkle in his eye that told you he wasn’t serious about throwing you out, but it didn’t stop you from feeling timid about the conversation, “Umm, okay. His name is Dylan. We were both in your Bachelor bio class, that’s how we met. Or kind of. We were aware of each other but went to different parties and hung out with different people. It wasn’t until last year that we actually met and got chatting and started seeing each other. I thought it was the real thing, like proper love, soulmate stuff. So when he broke up with me it took me completely by surprise. Everything felt perfect with him. Except for the sex.” You paused, feeling a little self-conscious about speaking so frankly about your personal life, and with your professor no less. Roger removed his spectacles and wiped them on the bottom of his shirt, “Ms Y/L/N, you’re going to have to be able to talk about sex with me if you actually want this to work.” “The sex was fucking great okay? Especially at the start. But the longer we went out the more he pushed for me to be submissive to him. He’d joke around about wanting to fuck me while I was asleep or mostly asleep, and he’d dirty talk by calling me his toy or saying that he owned me or sometimes about pimping me out to his friends. I indulged some of his ideas like when he wanted to be especially rough with me, pushing my head down into the mattress, pulling my hair, slapping me, things like that. And it was fun, but I never enjoyed it the same way he did and whenever he brought up the sleep stuff or if he tried to bend me over while I was cooking dinner I always stopped him. He’d laugh about it and say he was just joking but I guess he meant it more than I thought he did.” Roger remained quiet, watching you thoughtfully until he was sure you were finished, “If we did this what limits would you want in place?” “None. I want to be the perfect submissive for Dylan, I want to prove I can be whatever he wants.” Roger shook his head and put down his glass, “What was it you told Dylan when he suggested using you while you were in the middle of something or if he brought up the sleep stuff?” “I just told him no, I wasn’t into it or I was busy.” “Then that’s a limit. If you don’t want to do those things, that’s okay. Everyone has limits.” “But that’s the point. I need to learn how to be into those things so he’ll have me back. My limits are what made him leave.” Roger exhaled heavily though his nose, “Okay then, is there anything you would consider a turn off?” “I don’t know,” “Well I don’t believe that. I’m sure you have at least some idea of what you like and what you don’t.” “Yeah I guess I do but if I’m the submissive one then it doesn’t matter what I want. This is about Dylan and doing what he wants.” “Personally, I’m not big into feet stuff – toe sucking, foot jobs, anything like that – it just doesn’t appeal to me, whether I’m acting more dominant or more submissive, and I’ve made sure to tell every one of the women I’ve been with who hinted that they’d be into doing that kind of thing. A lot of women, in my experience at least, don’t like anal or things like knife play or scenes that feel violent or menacing.” He paused, watching your reactions, “From what you’ve just told me, it sounds like Dylan might be into free use and consensual non-consent so if either of those things sound like a turn off to you, you should let me know. Dylan will have limits of what he’s comfortable with and comfortable doing to others, I guarantee it. You need to make your limits known too. It’s all part of being in a D/S relationship and playing with any kind of BDSM type kink. The main rule we follow is safe, sane and consensual, and believe me, I will make sure we follow it during our lessons. So, is there anything you would consider a turn off or anything you wouldn’t want to do, even for Dylan?” “Can I think about it and get back to you?” “I suppose so. If it helps I can give you an idea of things I could teach you and you can tell me if any of them don’t feel right.” “Yeah, I think that would help,” “Alright umm, obviously because this is about what Dylan likes we should address consensual non-consent and free use at some point, but they would come later. Somnophilia too. I’d probably start with something easier or more common anyway. Spanking is nearly guaranteed, basic bondage methods – cuffs, ropes, that sort of thing – maybe some more extreme bondage too depending on how much you enjoyed the basic bondage. Ummm, choking, maybe some gags, tease and denial for sure. Any of that sounding too scary or intimidating or just not fun?” “They all sound okay I think, although some of them I haven’t heard of before.” “It’s a start at least. Of course, I would begin with the smaller kinks and work our way up to the more intense ones, and hopefully by that point we’ll both be more familiar with your limits and what you are interested in taking further.” “So, does that mean your agreeing to tutor me?” “I can definitely work with this.” “You mean it?” “Yes. Apparently I do.” He trailed his gaze over you for a moment, “How would you feel if I suggested we move this to the bedroom?” Your heart skipped a beat and you hoped your shock hadn’t shown on your face, “You want to start now?” “Sort of. What do we do at the beginning of a science experiment?” “Measure a control group,” “Exactly, you do a control before you mess with variables so you have something to measure them against. In this case, I think we’ll be able to tailor kinks to you better if I have some idea of what you enjoy during sex and what it takes to get you off. Is that okay?” “Yeah, of course, yeah. Makes sense.” “If you want to wait a couple of days we can,” “No, now’s as good a time as any. And the sooner we get into it all the better really.” Roger chuckled and stood, holding out his hand to help you out of your seat, “You’ve always been an enthusiastic student.”

Leaving your plates and glasses on the balcony table, Roger led you towards his bedroom. You wished you’d had a little more to drink, just to dull the sudden wave of nerves that had risen up. You were about to fuck a professor. Professor Taylor. It was a bizarre scenario you’d got yourself into and in an effort to distract yourself a little and calm down, you focused on his bedroom wall as he busied about closing curtains, eyes trained on a framed watercolour of a lake under some cherry blossom trees. “You like it?” “Huh? Oh, yeah, it’s pretty,” “I got that while I was in Japan a few years ago.” You nodded, not sure what to say next. “Are you okay?” You turned and found Roger much closer than he had been a moment before. “Are you sure you want to do this?” “Yes, sorry, just a bit nervous I guess. Feels kind of odd now that I’m actually here. If I’m being honest, I didn’t really expect you to agree to this.” “I did tell you your idea was insane. But that’s okay,” he slowly reached forward, his hand settling on your hip and gently tugging, encouraging you to step in closer, “It’s kind of weird for me too. So, we’ll go slow. And if you want to stop at any time we can.” You nodded, eyes glued to Roger, and let your tongue wet your lips. His eyes followed the movement, “Does that mean you want to kiss me?” There was a playfulness to his voice, teasing almost, and you found yourself relaxing and agreeing that you did. And for the first time you realised just what it meant for those rumours to be true. “So then kiss me.”

                                                     ****** 

A kiss you could do. Pushing aside the realisation that this was your first kiss since Dylan left, you leaned in and pressed your lips to Roger’s, though you pulled away quickly. Roger didn’t say anything, just waited, lips lightly parted. Your heart was racing with excitement and uncertainty, but you wanted more. He welcomed your lips the second time they met his, his hand gripping your hip harder now that he was certain you were going to stay. It was almost needy the way he kissed back, something you’d not have expected from your Professor. His nose bumped yours and yet he didn’t seem to care, leaning further into you, his tongue tickling your lip seconds before you felt it slide against your own tongue. Familiar but entirely different from the kisses you were used to. His hands didn’t move like Dylan’s did, not grabbing but gently squeezing, reassuringly firm. His leg was suddenly between yours and you took a step back in surprise. Roger followed so you took another and another until you felt the edge of the bed behind you. Dylan and your nerves almost entirely forgotten, you reached for Roger’s belt. He let you unbuckle it and pull it loose before he grabbed the hem of your shirt and lifted it over your head, kissing you between looks heavy with desire. He broke away for a moment and toed off his shoes, bending to take his socks off too, “So, is there anything you particularly like, any positions?” You copied his movements, kicking your own shoes just under the bed, “Not really. I can work with whatever.” “Stop trying to please me and tell me what you like Ms Y/L/N,” he said, reaching for your hips again so he could push your jeans down. “I mean I guess I like being on top, riding, whatever you want to call it.,” you quickly unhooked your bra and let it drop to the floor, “But Dylan tended to like me under him.” “New rule,” Roger said, kicking his own pants off his ankle as you tugged his shirt from his shoulders, “No talking about your ex when we’re this close to being naked. Okay?” “Yeah, sorry, good rule.” “Y’know I could have taken your bra off too,” “Faster this way,” “I’ll let you have it this time. But next time I unwrap you myself.” You shivered at the implications of the statement as Roger resumed the kiss and pressed you backwards onto the mattress, quickly climbing on top of you, his hands braced on each side of your head as he leaned down to kiss you once more, hungrily.

He didn’t stay there long though. A few seconds later he’d shimmied down your body, creating a trail of kiss warmed skin, until his face was positioned directly above your breasts. You raised your head and watched enraptured as he his eyes met yours, the hint of a mischievous grin lighting up his face, and then he lowered his lips to the top of your left breast. You let your head drop back to the bed and ached your back a little, pushing your chest towards him. “Yeah, you like that?” he asked, voice rougher than you’d ever heard it before, “what if I do this?” slowly he let his teeth sink into you, just for a second. It was enough to pull a small hum of appreciation from you so he repeated the action on your right breast. “Feels good?” “Yeah,” you breathed out, softly. “Yeah?” he asked, pushing himself up so he was straddling your waist, “What about this?” You felt his warm breath surround your nipple before you felt his tongue lap against it or his lips enclose it, letting your eyes slip shut as you drew your lip between your teeth. He seemed to appreciate the response and made sure to repeat the action a few times against each nipple, sucking on one as his gently flicked the other with his thumb. You tingled at the sensation of his warm saliva cooling and gently squeezed your legs together. “Don’t be shy,” he said, sitting up again and laying a hand over each of your breasts, “I can tell you enjoy it when I play with your tits,” You pulled in a shaky breath as he squeezed your breasts, “Mmhmm, yeah,” “Do you want some more?” “Yes, Professor,” He made a short clicking sound with his tongue, “I think we’re past Professor by now, you can call me Roger. And you can tell me what you want,” “I want more,” “More what?” You hummed again at the feeling of him massaging your boobs. “More what? Should I keep sucking on your perky fucking tits? Jesus they’re so fucking soft,” he cleared his throat and shook his head a little, “Or, should I give some other part a bit of attention? Your pussy’s probably feeling a bit left out, huh?” You’d expected him to boss you around, make demands, and you’d expected a bit of dirty talk (the kind where he’d tell you how sexy you looked or that he couldn’t wait to fuck you). But the reality surpassed everything you’d considered likely. You certainly hadn’t expected to get wet just from his tone and his words. And you definitely hadn’t expected to be doing what he asked, agreeing with everything he said. But that’s exactly what was happening, and it felt good. “Please touch my pussy.” “It would be my pleasure,” he smiled softly as he climbed off of your waist and pulled your underwear down, “and yours.”

The change of position gave you a moment to catch your breath but also to take in Roger’s appearance properly. You had to admit you liked what you saw. Of course, you already knew he was attractive. More than once you’d found yourself distracted in class, mind on what a cute bum he had or how shapely his hands were or else on his fluffy hair, light blonde but with streaks of grey blended throughout. He was the epitome of the hot teacher really, especially with his gravelly voice and the youthful sparkle of his eyes, magnified by his usual pair of glasses. What you hadn’t seen before, and what you were revelling in now, was his naked torso. There were muscles in his arms, not Hollywood style bulging biceps and you’d certainly never have noticed them under the sleeves of his work shirts, but they were revealed as he shifted his position and you had the sudden urge to reach out and squeeze them. A light fuzz of hair covered his chest, though it was so light it was barely visible, and a marginally thicker thatch of it trailed down into his underwear. And in between was his stomach, the years of fatherhood evidenced by how it softly protruded out over the hem of his underwear. Once, a few years ago, someone had found a photo of Professor Taylor taken in the 90s when he was twenty-something and, thanks to the university meme facebook page and a few students with near influencer levels of followers, just about the whole school had seen it and had wet dreams about it. He’d been stick thin then, eyes ringed by dark grungy eyeliner, long messy hair falling about his face, and his plaid shirt unbuttoned. The Roger settling beside you now was miles away from that boy but you liked his current look, from his shorter hair to his rounder body, though he seemed to have the same skinny legs. “What are you thinking about?” he asked as he propped himself up on his elbow to look you over. “This is…better than I thought it would be,” “Thanks for the vote of confidence,” “No, that’s not what I meant. I don’t know, I just...I could never picture it before, actually being with you. But you’ve made it feel easy and, well not normal, but y’know, not too strange either.” “So you’ve been liking it so far?” “Mmhmm, it’s felt really good,” “Good, that’s what I want to hear. But,” your breath hitched as you felt his fingers stroke between your legs, “experiments not done yet.” He watched his hand as it moved, his fingers sliding between your lips, spreading the wetness that had begun to pool with his earlier attentions. Each shift of his fingers pulled soft sighs and small ohs from you as the pleasure began to slowly build and you pulled him down into another kiss, wanting to feel him closer. He eased the first finger into you gradually, whispering questions about how it felt and if you were ready for more. You’d have expected his constant quizzing to be annoying but he peppered them between comments about making you feel good and dirty talk about getting you ready for his cock as he pulled your hand over to his crotch to give him some small relief. And somehow everything just seemed to turn you on more, his obvious desire to make sure you were comfortable included. You barely registered when he added the second finger, pumping both into you rhythmically as he delicately sucked at your pulse point, though you knew the third was coming, a response to your pleas for more. You’d meant his dick really, ready to move things along but he’d been adamant about making sure you were properly stretched out, not relenting until he’d fit four fingers inside you. “Fo-four?” you whimpered as he pressed the last one into you, “Three not enough?” “Just to be on the safe side. My cock is about average length but its girthy,” “I – oh Roger – It feels huge to me,” “Please, I’m 46, I know it’s not the biggest thing in the world. But I also know it doesn’t need to be to fuck you so right.” You weren’t sure how to reply though he didn’t give you many options, jerking his fingers inside you and making you moan. “I know there are nerves involved which can impact how wet you get and I don’t want to do anything that would cause you pain or discomfort, so I’m going to finger you until I’m ready to stop. You can beg all you want but I won’t fuck you until I decide you can handle it.” Even that was hot though you weren’t exactly sure why, but whatever it was you found yourself nodding in agreement, staring at him through eyes half lidded with pleasure.

When Roger was satisfied that you were ready for more than his fingers, he pulled them from you and got to his knees, shuffling around to rummage through his bedside cabinet. A moment later you realised why as he kicked off his underwear and tore open a condom. You watched as he rolled it down his shaft, noting he’d described himself quite accurately. “Sorry,” he said as he caught your eye, “did you want to do that?” “No, that’s okay,” you chuckled, “just that Dylan never liked to wear them,” “Hey, we have a rule remember. And this is the first time I’m fucking one of my students, I’m not doing it raw, are you kidding?” “Sorry. And yeah, you’re probably right to use one.” “Hey, this is just the control remember. Condoms are a variable we can change later.” You laughed at that and nodded as Roger squirted some lube into his palm and began stroking himself, letting out small groans at the contact. “Are you going to fuck me yet or is there something else I have to wait for?” “Careful Ms Y/L/N, you know I don’t tolerate that kind of attitude.” He smiled as he crawled over you again, catching your lips quickly before he sat back on his heels and pushed your legs wide. With a final look, as if to give you a chance to end things before they went any further, he lined himself up and pressed himself into you. You gasped as he filled you easily, bottoming out. “God you feel good,” he panted, “are you okay? Can I move?” “Yeah,” you nodded, “please move.” He breathed out a small sigh as he pulled his hips back and snapped them forward again, finding a rhythm. As he got more comfortable in the moment, Roger leaned over you again, pushing his face between your breasts and laving your skin with his tongue. He rediscovered the spots he’d found earlier, humming around your nipples and squeezing your boobs as he thrust into you. “Feel good?” “Yeah,” “You close yet?” “Not really.” “That’s alright,” he said softly as he readjusted his position, sitting back and lifting your legs over his shoulders. You felt the angle change as he fucked into you harder than before, his pace a little faster, “Play with your tits for me.” You didn’t hesitate to do as he asked, panting in sync with his thrusts as he dropped his fingers to your clit, rubbing in tight circles, forcing more moans and whines from your throat. “That’s right, tell me how good it is to be spread out under your professor, full of my hard cock. Christ you’re so fucking tight. Why didn’t I fuck you sooner?”.” You let your moans pick up a little as he ploughed into you, willing yourself to reach your climax. “Yeah? You like that. Are you close now?” “Uh-” “So no.” “Sorry, i-it just takes a while usually. I could f-fake it if you wa-nt to stop.” “No!” his voice sounded strained as he stilled inside you, “This is about getting you off and I will keep fucking you even if it takes all night for you to cum. I just need to readjust again.” Your laugh became a small whine as he pulled out of you and rolled you over so you were on top of him, “what are you-?” “Ride me. You said you like being on top so ride me,” You smiled and pressed your lips to his quickly before settling yourself over him and carefully sinking down into place. As you took him as deep as you could you halted a moment to enjoy the sensation of being full again, gently rocking your hips as you braced your hands on Roger’s chest. He held your gaze as he slipped two fingers into his mouth, pulling them out when they were dripping with saliva. He pressed them together with his thumb before bringing the wet digits to your right nipple, massaging it until you arched your back and tilted your head backwards. There was no way to resist any longer and you raised yourself on your knees before sinking back down, grunting as he hit just the right spot. “Better?” he grunted. “Mhmm,” you managed to get out before a moan, once again lifting and dropping yourself. You settled into the flow of it, the movement of your hips and the way you pulsed around him as you took him harder and faster, feeling the pleasure build and build and build. Until Roger’s voice, cracking with the effort, broke through your concentration. “Fuck, I’m close, I’m close. I’m gonna cum,” “Okay,” you said, not sure what else you could say, a little disappointed that it was going to be over before you could finish. So much for all night, though you supposed he’d only said that to help you relax and finish faster. At least it was hot watching him unravel beneath you, his grunts and groans loud and shameless, his hips spasming under yours. You waited until he was done, eyes closed and chest rising and falling rapidly as he tried to regain control of his breathing, and then lifted yourself to dismount him. Or you would have, except you felt his hands grab you by the hips and press you down again. “Your turn,” he said it so earnestly, no hint of the dominant teasing from earlier or any egotistical overconfidence, that you found yourself agreeing immediately, shocked into doing what he was guiding you to. You raised your hips again, let him pull you back down hard and before long you’d found your rhythm again. He let go of your hip, moving the hand to messily rub your clit as you shifted a little, changing the angle by a fraction. It was enough to have you careening towards the edge, even as Roger pulled air through his teeth as the extra stimulation. “So close,” you muttered before he could ask, eyes shut, intent on your mission. “C’mon, cum on my cock, show me how good it feels,” You nodded unthinkingly as he encouraged you, feeling it just out of reach until finally the familiar warmth washed over you, a long moan slipping from between your lips as you swivelled your hips, prolonging the orgasm as long as you could. “There you go, good girl.”

                                                      ******

Roger gasped as you climbed off him and carefully removed his condom to throw it out. “I could have done that,” “You did enough.” He was smiling when you turned back to face him and beckoned you over to join him on the bed once more, pressing a kiss to your jaw and the corner of your mouth before he found your lips again. You sighed against him, lost in the blissful warmth of the moment. “I’ll do it. I’ll tutor you,” Roger said after some time, his arm draped over your side, your faces inches from each other. “You mean it?” “Yes.” “Because I’m a hot shag?” He let out an exhale of laughter, “Because I would rather you learnt about that kind of stuff from someone like me than some random on the internet who thinks that being dominant means being cruel or causing pain. At least I can make sure you approach things from a healthy angle with your own enjoyment in mind as much as your ex’s.” “Thank you. So…when do we start?” “Give me a few days to plan out some lessons, put together a curriculum.” “Oh, so it’s going to be like proper tutoring then.” “You’re the one that came to a teacher about this.” “Fair enough.” You would have happily stayed there longer and you later wondered if Roger would have let you had an alarm on his phone not gone off, a reminder to put his bins out for collection in the morning. He frowned as he realised the time and glanced at you. The piercing melody had brought the reality of the situation back to both of you. “I guess that means I should leave, right?” Roger sat up and scooted a little further away from you, “Yes, you probably should.” He paused for a moment, “No one can know about this.” “I know, I understand. It’s our secret.” He pulled in a breath, “Exactly, our secret. Do you need me to call you a cab?” “No, it’s fine, I drove here.” “Okay. Well, why don’t we get dressed and I’ll walk you out.” “Are you okay with this? If you really don’t want to teach me, I’d understand.” “No I want to. More than I should.” “That’s okay. No one will know and we’ll do things your way, whatever you think is best.” “My way,” he muttered to himself, “Yes. Exactly. Okay. Um, tell you what,” he swung his legs out of the bed and bent forward to retrieve the underwear he’d discarded earlier, pulling them up under cover of the corner of the bed sheet, “I will grab my things and go collect our dishes from dinner. You can stay here and get changed and then when you’re ready to go, come find me in the kitchen, okay Ms Y/L/N?” “Sounds great, Professor Taylor.” He nodded at you once more before he left, bending to collect his pants and shirt on his way. You waited a minute or so, mind racing with the events of the evening and the promise of what would be coming, before you too stood and began to redress.

When you felt sufficiently tidy you stepped out into the hallway and headed in the direction you hoped led to the kitchen. Roger was there, redressed and hardly looking like he’d just got out of bed, leaning against the bench, eyes out of focus. When you arrived though his head jerked around towards your movement. “All good?” he asked, “got everything?” “Yeah, think so.” “Well,” he said, leading you towards the front door, “it was great having you. Over. Having you over. I’m glad we could come to an agreement.” “It was great for me too Professor.” “I will see you in class on Monday, don’t forget about that reading you’re meant to do.” “Got it. Um, can I ask about my next tutoring session, when would that be?” “I will talk to you about it after class on Monday if that’s okay.” “Absolutely, whatever works for you Professor.” He opened the door, standing on his side of the entrance as you stepped outside, “Right, well. Goodnight Ms Y/L/N,” “Goodnight Roger,” you said, quickly leaning in to kiss his cheek, “and thank you.” He still looked a little stunned as you got into your car, wondering just what you’d got yourself into.

[yuta-nakamots]

misfit - j.sc

Pairing - Sungchan x Reader

Genre - Horror/Thriller, Angst, Fluff

Warnings - serial killer, character death, violence, murder, implications of sex

Summary - A murderer is on the loose, killing with no regret and ending the lives of more than just a few people. No one knew who it was, turning against each other upon even the slightest bit of doubt. Maybe you should’ve been more careful with who you chose to trust. 

Word Count - 5.3k

A/N - this is inspired entirely from a dream I had a few days ago. I've added very little to what I saw in my dream aside from Sungchan as the male lead. yes, I am freaked out by this and yes, I am scared of writing for Sungchan bc I don’t know his personality all too well but as an ‘01 liner myself I have faith in us

Written for the #NeoHalloween writing festival hosted by @nct-writers​. Check out the masterlist here.

For five months now, your town has lived in fear. A serial killer was on the loose and he was known by the name of Hickleback Jack though no one knew where the name came from or who had started it. Each month, the population of your town voted on the local community board to have one person executed who they thought was Hickleback Jack. So far, not a single guess was right leaving five innocent people dead. Well, five plus an extra thirty, give or take.

See, the thing about Hickleback Jack, was that every time the votes came in at the end of the month, he could see just who voted for him and targeted them as his next victims. He killed six of those people over the following month, adding up to seven dead each time the town guessed incorrectly. It was getting to a point where no one trusted each other, no one dared to say anything against each other in fear of being accused or in fear of being the next to fall mercy to Hickleback Jack.

Not much was known about this killer other than his appearance. He’s male with a tall and broad figure though he always covers his face with some kind of mask. His common weapon is known to be an axe. People have claimed to have seen him late at night under the dim orange glow of the street lamps but he was never caught by the authorities, leaving everyone restless and waiting for the next kill.

The night was still young when you had gotten home from school and it was a Friday night which was basically an open invitation for you to call over your boyfriend, Sungchan. He had transferred in to your university at the start of the school year, and had ended up sitting next to you during your sophomore seminar class, leading to the start of your friendship with him.

A simple friendship soon blossomed into a relationship after Sungchan’s bright personality began shining through his somewhat intimidating exterior. You lived without fear when Sungchan was around, the love you had for him blocking out anything else in the world that wasn’t him.

You sat on your bed, your homework spread out in front of you while you held your phone up to your ear. “Do you want to come over tonight?” You ask as soon as he picks up your call.

You hear rustling on the other end of the call before Sungchan clears his throat and speaks, his voice husky from sleep. “Sorry, can you repeat that?”

“I said, do you want to come over tonight?” You paused and heard him yawn. “You fell asleep after class didn’t you?” You smiled to yourself thinking of your boyfriend’s handsome face as he napped after getting back to his apartment once he finished with his classes for the day, which was a common occurrence now that the semester was in full swing.

“Mmm,” he hummed in thought, “as much as I’d love to, I really shouldn’t have taken that nap because of how much homework I have.”

“Oh, that’s okay, do your homework first,” you reassure him, “maybe we can hang out some other time this weekend. It’s only Friday after all.”

“Definitely. Are you starting yours right now?” Sungchan asked.

“Yeah, I’d rather not wait and end up cramming on Sunday night.” You laughed, knowing that said event has happened more times that you’d like to admit.

Sungchan let out a noise of agreement. “I’ll let you know when I’m done with my homework though.”

“Same here.” You promised.

“Alright, let’s get to work and I’ll talk to you soon.” He told you.

“Sounds good, love you.”

“Love you too.”

With that you hung up, eager to start on your homework in hopes of getting to spend more time with your boyfriend. You actually had a lot of it this weekend thanks to molecular biology, and you figured that if you couldn’t talk to Sungchan, who had yet to take the course, you called up your study group discord instead. Luckily, many of them were in similar situations as you, faced with the daunting task of completing all the worksheets assigned during class earlier in the day.

“Okay so was anyone paying attention during the lecture today?” Your classmate Chenle asked.

“I know Yeji fell asleep so you’re in the same boat as her.” You interject, recalling the sight of both of them knocked out in their seats as the professor droned on about the functions of the structures inside cells.

Yeji let out a gasp of shock at how blatantly you called her out. “I may have fallen asleep but at least I still know that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.”

“Everyone knows that, Yeji.” Your other classmate Jaemin said, his voice void of enthusiasm.

“Okay, Jaemin, we get it, Mr. Serious.” You teased.

“Yeah, this is a biology study group, not a bible study group, lighten up a little.” Chenle jokes.

Jaemin scoffed, “sometimes I feel like I’m the only one who’s trying to do well in this class.”

“Well not all of us enjoy the taste of coffee with six shots of caffeine in them.” Yeji argued back.

“Guys,” you called out as Jaemin and Yeji started arguing, “guys!” They finally stopped to hear what you had to say. “Let’s just get this over with sooner rather than later because I know none of us want to be awake at 2am trying to figure this out alone.”

“Agreed,” Chenle said, “so question three, the one about the DNA mutation, how is missense different from nonsense?”

“Missense is where one of the bases mutates and changes to something else, therefore changing the protein level,” Jaemin explained, “nonsense is the same theoretical concept except it spells out one of the stop codes.”

Yeji let out a groan, “can you slow down, or like, I don’t know, use easier words or something?”

Most of your night passed by like this and before you knew it, it was already nearing midnight and you could tell your classmates were just as exhausted as you. “I think we should call it here.”

“Definitely,” Yeji confirmed, “tomorrow morning at 10?”

You all let out similar answers of acknowledgement before Chenle spoke up. “The poll closes on tomorrow night so make sure to vote if you haven’t already.”

Because of how long this has been going on for, everyone was already on the same page once someone mentioned the poll or voting. “There were only five kills this month so I wouldn’t be surprised if the last one is announced tomorrow or Sunday morning.” Jaemin chimed in.

“All the recent kills were related to the university so I know a lot of people are suspecting someone in our age range.” Yeji informed the group.

Jaemin let out a chuckle, “if the killer actually is a college student, I wouldn’t be surprised since it is getting close to the last wave of midterms and then finals so that would explain why the victims fall into the same category.” The chat fell silent at that. “I’m just saying that he’s getting a little lazy by grouping all his kills like this.”

“Jaemin, are you sure you’re not the killer?” Chenle asked with a laugh at the end.

“Guys, I can promise you that I’m not the killer, I swear on my life.” Jaemin promised.

“Alright, that’s enough detective work for tonight, I’ll start the call again around 10 tomorrow. Sounds good?” You conclude, wanting to curl up under your covers already, which is exactly what you do once everyone wishes each other a good night and hung up.  

Morning came a little too quickly for your liking, the bright sunlight flooding into your room through the window and forcing you awake. Checking your phone, you saw that it was 9:30am, meaning you had some time to spare before your next meeting with the bio study group, along with a notification from Sungchan that he had sent well after you had fallen asleep.

Sungchan > y/n

2:14am: Just got rescheduled to work opening shift tomorrow.

2:15am: Didn’t finish my homework but I can stop by at your house after work with my stuff and we can hang out and have fun once we’re both done?

Your heart warmed at how he stayed up late trying to finish his homework for you and that he suggested the idea of coming over after his shift at a small local restaurant finished just so the two of you could be together even if you’d be focusing on your own tasks for a while.

y/n > Sungchan

9:32am: Sorry I didn’t text back earlier, I just woke up!

9:32am: But of course you can come over, I might even be done with my work by then ;)

You plugged your phone to let it charge and left it on your nightstand as you made yourself breakfast downstairs. The house was quiet since your mom already left for work and you dad worked a night shift job and was probably sleeping at the moment. It was strangely serene as you prepared yourself a bowl of cereal though the calm was rudely interrupted by the sound of your ringtone coming from your room.

Deciding to get it after eating breakfast, you poured the cereal in first, thinking about the way Sungchan had told you before that he liked to pour the milk first and let the cereal soak up the milk. “It makes it super soggy and I like it.” He tried reasoning with you, to which you only raised an eyebrow at.

Just as you put the milk carton back into the refrigerator and was about to take a bit of your cereal, your phone started going off again. You placed your bowl onto the kitchen table and made your way back up to your bedroom to see what it was that was so important this early in the morning. Checking the notifications, it was Yeji who had been calling you so you shot her a message.

y/n > Yeji

9:39am: What’s up?

Yeji > y/n

9:40am: I just dreamt that it was Jaemin who was the killer

9:40am: please call me right now I feel like I’m going to go insane

You heeded her words and called her immediately. “So what happened in the dream?”

“I don’t know, I just remember being chased by a man with an axe and I was running to the school to try to see if I could get help but then I tripped and when I turned around, it was Jaemin.” Yeji blurted out without a single breath in between.

You paused, trying to take in all the information she just threw at you. “Do you have any reason as to why you think you dreamt this?”

“The way he was talking last night,” she stopped to catch her breath, “he spoke so in detail that I couldn’t help but overthink like, what if he is actually the killer? What if we’re next?”

“Well, you can vote for him in the poll if you want but personally, I don’t think it’s him.” You think of your next words carefully. “I’m not trying to invalidate your thoughts but Jaemin does come from a reputable family-”

“Y/n, it could be anyone. Family doesn’t matter. We have no information on the guy, we don’t know what economic class he’s in or anything.” Yeji interrupted.

You took a few seconds to gather your thoughts before speaking again. “That is true, but we all know Jaemin wants to be a surgeon right? He’s in all these difficult classes and he maintains such high grades-”

“Okay but how is that relevant?” Yeji interrupted yet again.

She was getting on your nerves but you held yourself back. “Listen, I’m just trying to say that with the amount of time and effort he puts into school, I don’t think he could be the killer. The killer plans his kills well enough that we just can’t find him and that probably takes just as much time as school does for us.”

Yeji took a while to respond though when she did, her words surprised you. “Now you’re starting to sound like the killer.”

“Yeji, I can promise you that it’s not me. I’m just as scared as you are in this whole situation,” you reasoned, “I’ll even vote for Jaemin if it makes you feel better.”

She let out a sigh across the line. “Okay fine. Maybe a kill will happen while we’re on the call and it’ll clear Jaemin’s name.”

“I think you’re letting it all get to you, just try not to think about it for a bit.” You advised.

“But am I really overreacting y/n? We live every day in fear of being the next victim. Tomorrow is not promised to any of us, so am I really overreacting?” You look over at the clock on your wall as she spoke, realizing that it’s already 9:55 and you should probably start the call already.

“No, I don’t think you’re overreacting, I’m just saying that constantly thinking about it to this extent isn’t good for you. We still have school to pay attention to,” you explain, “speaking of, I’m gonna start the call now.”

“I can’t just stop thinking about it that easily but whatever, let’s just hope that we’re not associating ourselves with a murderer by doing this.” You can only shake your head as you start the call.

Chenle joined immediately followed by Yeji. “Good morning ladies, President Zhong here. How are we doing on this fine day?”

You rolled your eyes even though a smile spread across your face. “I’m doing good, Mr. President. Ready to finish off these worksheets.”

“Good, good,” Chenle affirmed, sticking with his act, “and you, Miss Yeji?”

“Fine.” She shot out.

Chenle let out a quiet chuckle, “someone’s a little grumpy this morning. Maybe we should’ve met a bit later.”

“No, let’s just get this over with.” Yeji grumbled just as Jaemin joined.

“Great! Now that the head brain cell is here, let’s get this meeting started.” Chenle exclaimed.

Four hours into your meeting and eight out of ten worksheets later, your phone begins to ring with an incoming call from Sungchan. “Hold on guys, I gotta take this call. Hello?”

“I’m downstairs, come pick me up.” You couldn’t deny the butterflies that spread throughout your chest upon hearing your boyfriend’s voice. You got up to let him in though you certainly didn’t miss the teasing coming from your laptop as your classmates yelled about you and Sungchan.

As you made your way downstairs, you froze halfway down the stairs, seeing Sungchan already in the kitchen eating the bowl of cereal you forgot about. “I’m guessing you made this for yourself earlier and forgot to eat it.” He said through a mouthful of food.

“Babe, no, don’t eat that, it’s like five hours old. The milk is probably stale.” You exclaimed, worried about his health if it really did go bad.

Sungchan only shrugged as he took another spoonful into his mouth. “Tastes fine to me.”

You rolled your eyes before turning to head back upstairs. “Join me in my room once you’re ready, you cereal monster. Leave the dishes in the sink too.” As you returned to your room, you couldn’t help but wonder how Sungchan got in though you figure he’s probably seen you use the spare key under the doormat a couple times since you often were too lazy to get your own keys out of your bag most of the time.

When you sat down in front of your computer again, Jaemin had just finished explaining the answer to the problem you guys were working on earlier so you chimed in asking him to go over it again though he was quickly overrun by an excited Chenle. “Is Sungchan there?” He practically yelled.

“No, not yet, he’s eating some soggy cereal downstairs.” You inform him.

“Alright, let me know when he comes in.” Chenle says, unphased by your boyfriends’ odd preference of cereal.

Halfway through Jaemin’s explanation, Sungchan came into your room, placing his bag down at the foot of the bed before he took his jacket off and stripped out of his work uniform. “I heard a door open, is that Sungchan?” Chenle shouted over Jaemin once more.

“I never get to fucking speak in this group.” Jaemin huffed, at which Chenle muttered a quick ‘sorry’ back.

“Yes, Chenle, Sungchan is here,” you announce, looking over at the boy in question who had just finished pulling a shirt over his head and winked when he saw you staring at his body, “he seems very flirty today, must be because of you, Mr. Zhong.”

Sungchan sits down next to you and places a kiss on your cheek, smelling oddly of cleaning supplies, but you pay no mind to that, figuring he must have used them at work. “How’s it going Chenle?” He asks, though his attention is only on you and he places his hands on your cheeks and leaves a quick kiss on your lips.

“I’m gonna pretend I didn’t just hear the two of you kissing,” Chenle remarks, earning a laugh from Sungchan, “but anyways, you should come back to the basketball team. We miss our giant point guard, you know.”

“Nah, I’m too busy these days. I already have work and school plus I still want to spend time with y/n.” He commented as he shifted to lie on his stomach next to you.

“Man, who knew a girl would be all it took to make this dude throw his love for basketball out the window.” Chenle taunted.

“Love makes you do things, you know how it is.” Sungchan replied, resting his head on your thigh.

Running a hand through his hair, “anyways,” you divert, “back to what Jaemin was saying about meiosis.”

“Thank you, y/n, I thought I’d never be able to speak again.” Jaemin uttered pointedly. “As I was saying, the main difference between meiosis and mitosis is that it creates four daughter cells instead of two like mitosis does.”

“Hey guys, wait, did you see the article that just came out?” Yeji inquired. “It’s another death.”

There was a moment of silence before anyone said anything. “No but you can read it to us.” Chenle concluded.

“Okay,” you could hear the deep breath Yeji took before reading the article, “it says here that the body was found at around 1:20pm in an alley between the lower-income housing apartments, the cause of death is assumed to be by Hickleback Jack using his axe, and the estimated time of death is anywhere from 12 to 1pm.”

“Wow,” Jaemin began, “so he just killed out in broad daylight.”

“Not gonna lie Jaemin, but I thought you were the killer.” Yeji let out blatantly.

You were mildly shocked at her bluntness, but not surprised given how stressed everyone was. “Me?” Jaemin gasped, “Yeji, you know I’m pretty much Rapunzel with how much time I spend in my room studying. And when I’m not studying, I’m either editing pictures or playing video games.”

“It’s true,” Chenle confirms, “he really doesn’t leave his room. We had a sleepover once and I felt like I was becoming a hermit like him.” Sungchan slightly wheezed at that, sending Chenle over the moon. “Did you hear that? Did you guys hear that? Sungchan thinks I’m funny!”

“Yeah yeah, enough about me being a hermit. But Yeji,” Jaemin addressed, “why did you think it was me?”

Yeji hesitated before responding. “I just- the way you were talking the other night...I don’t know. It just sounded so specific and detailed that I couldn’t help but think that it could have been you.”

“I don’t think a murderer would simply reveal his plans like that, you know.” Sungchan proposed.

“Well yeah, but it’s just the way he spoke, it was like he had things organized...you know what? Let’s forget I said that, but I know the four of us are clear.” Yeji resigned.

Sungchan sat up, “wait, why am I not cleared?”

“Y/n, what time did he call you?”

“Like 2-ish.”

“Exactly. Sungchan, you don’t have an alibi, as far as we know, until 2 and the time of death is stated to be 12 to 1pm.”

“I was at work earlier in the day, though.”

“Can you prove it to us?” Yeji pressed on.

“Yeah, my coworkers can vouch for me.”

You were quite surprised at how aggressive Yeji was being towards your boyfriend but you didn’t see any reason to stop her since she had very valid arguments. “Send a screenshot of it to Chenle and we’ll verify you from there.” Yeji commanded.

Sungchan slouched down a little next to you. “I don’t have the numbers of my coworkers though.”

“Alright, then you’re still on the list of suspects.”

After finishing all the worksheets for microbio and ending the call around 3:30, Sungchan pulled out his laptop and started typing away at a half-finished lab report for his human A&P class. You fell asleep curled into his body, his warmth and the constant tapping of his keyboard lulling you to sleep.

When you woke again, you immediately noticed the absence of a large boy next to you and frowned to yourself. As you came to, you heard noise coming from the kitchen and identified your mother’s voice followed by Sungchan’s. Noticing the time on your phone, you guess that he was probably helping her prepare dinner since it was already past 6 and your family ate around 7 before your dad left for work.

By the time you made yourself presentable and came downstairs, your mom and Sungchan were already setting the table. “Looks like our sleepyhead finally woke up.” Your mother exclaimed, making you grimace. “You didn’t tell me Sungchan was staying over,” you were about to open your mouth to say that you didn’t know that either but you weren’t given the chance to do so, “it’s okay, especially with that killer still on the loose, it makes me feel better knowing there’s someone around to protect my baby.”

You looked at Sungchan as if asking him for answers though he seemed to only avoid your gaze, reluctantly taking the seat across from you at the dining table. Your father walked in, delighted to see your boyfriend. “Sungchan! Good to see you, how are things at school?” He asked as he joined you all at the table.

“Okay for the most part, I haven’t taken to my writing class all that much though I enjoy my other science classes.” Sungchan answers.

Your dad hums in approval while you stare down Sungchan, trying to get him to look at you. “Remind me again what you’re majoring in again?” Your mom asks, Sungchan whips his head around faster than you can make eye contact with him.

“I’m majoring in forensics.” He states.

“Interesting, interesting,” your father contemplates, “you know, y/n here wants to become a pediatrician. The two of you are practically opposites in the science field, one dealing with crime and the other dealing with children.”

Sungchan let out a laugh, “I guess opposites really do attract then.”

You hated how well he entertained your parents and you hated how much they liked him. For the rest of dinner you tried to pin him down through your stares and even played a game of footsie with him but nothing seemed to work. It was only once the two of you were back in your room getting ready for bed that you were able to talk to him.

“Look, I’m not mad at you or anything, I’d just appreciate it if you talked to me first before just telling my parents that you’re staying over.” You told him as you went through your skincare routine.

Sungchan jumped onto your bed as he apologized. “Sorry, I just thought that since both of us finished our homework and with the killing today, it would just make sense for me to stay over.” He opened his arms, inviting you in as you stood up after finishing your night routine.

You copied him, jumping into your bed straight onto Sungchan, effectively pushing the air out of his body. He grunted as your weight fell onto him though he still wrapped his arms around your waist and shifted you up the length of your body so your face was level with his. “Hi” you giggle, shy from the sudden close proximity.

“Hey.” He says back with a smile as you slide off him, leaving an arm and leg slung over his body. “Tired?”

“No, not really, I took a nap earlier since someone didn’t care to wake me up.”

“You looked too cute, besides, you need all the rest you can get.” Sungchan explained, using his free hand to squish your cheeks. “If you’re really not tired then I know a way to make you tired.” His hand found its way down to your butt to further emphasize his point.

“Ew, no, not now.” You quickly refused, moving his hand up to your waist. “Just go to sleep and I’ll probably fall asleep after you anyways.”

“Oh wait,” Sungchan said, reaching over you to the nightstand for his phone, “did you vote on the poll yet?”

“No, I almost forgot.” You groaned, lazily reaching for your phone as well.

You pull up the local community board and enter your information, looking at the list of all the citizens, pondering on who you’d give your vote to. “Who are you voting for?” Sungchan asks, looking over at your screen.

“I really don’t know.” You tell him, though truthfully, you had someone in mind.

Thanks to the nap you had, you really couldn’t fall asleep no matter how hard you tried. You ended up dozing off occasionally but you’d wake up half an hour later only more irritated than when you first fell asleep.

You don’t remember what time it was, but at some point, Sungchan had removed himself from your grasp, unaware that you were still awake, though you made no effort to stop him thinking that he was just going to use the restroom and come back. Five minutes passed, five minutes turned into ten, then twenty, and you decided to check on him once thirty minutes had passed.

The house was completely dark, not even the light from the bathroom was on. You checked inside in case Sungchan had maybe gotten hurt and passed out, but he was nowhere to be found. After searching almost all the rooms in your house, you had yet to find any sign of him. After a bit of thinking, you had wandered out to your mothers’ greenhouse thinking that maybe some time with the plants would help to calm your mind.

It did anything but that.

Not long after setting foot inside of the small shed, you heard screams coming from nearby, getting closer and closer. You watched from the inside of the tinted glass as three girls ran through your backyard and into the next property. You couldn’t help it that you were frozen to your core, knowing who was coming.

You saw his frame as he jumped over the fence from the other end of your yard, axe in hand, running through the open grass and you thought he might have noticed you until he stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes glued on you. You should’ve ducked down as soon as the girls ran past but it was too late now and there was no second way out of the greenhouse.

You knew you should have tried to run, maybe smash through the glass panelling but something in you told you that maybe, just maybe, you’d be able to stop him. Steeling your nerves as he crosses the threshold of the greenhouse, you call out to him. “I know who you are.”

“I’m well aware of that.”

It was as if your world was crumbling before you, the once so comfortable relationship you knew felt fake, even though Sungchan, your loving boyfriend stood right there. The only difference was that you knew who he really was.

“Why?” You start, “why did you kill all those innocent people?”

“It’s all for fun, y/n.”

“What do you mean ‘for fun’? Those are real people you know, people with families and friends who miss them dearly.” You nearly cry out as he continues to approach you.

“You see, life is a game.” He paused his words as he came to stand in front of you. “Laws are nothing but a social construct that us humans follow mindlessly until our own demise.”

He takes a step closer to you, but you stand your ground. “Laws are what keep us safe and keep us happy. They allow us to lead our lives peacefully with others-”

“They are nothing but limits.” He closes the distance between the two of you, an arm wrapping around your waist, pulling you towards him, and you allow him to do so. “My dear, sweet, y/n. If only you weren’t so smart, I wouldn’t be faced with this dilemma.”

“You wouldn’t kill me.” You were trying to persuade him just as much as you were to yourself. “You’d never.”

“Oh? And what makes you think that?”

“You love me.”

“I do, I love you so dearly, but now that you know who’s behind all the killings, there’s no way that I can let you go.” You felt his axe nudge the back of your leg as he brought both arms around you. To an outsider, it would look as if a couple were having a conversation, but for you, this was a fight for your life.

“Take off the mask.”

“Why should I?”

“So I can talk to you properly.”

He took off the mask without much more convincing, his normally handsome face now distorted by the crazed look in his eyes. People often say that the eyes are the windows to the soul, and if they really were, then Sungchan didn’t have a soul.

“I swear to you that I won’t ever tell anyone about this, about you.”

“I don’t believe that you’ll keep that promise, my dear.”

“You know how much I love you. As long as we can stay together, I will not say anything.”

“This is not a tale of beauty and the beast. I am no beast to be tamed and there is no happy ending to this story.”

“Sungchan, no. You don’t mean that.”

“Do I really not mean it, or is that what you would like to believe? Something tells me it’s the latter.” He held you tight against him with one arm, the other raising his axe. “It’s truly a shame that your beauty must go to waste, you were truly a wonderful person both inside and out but I’m afraid that your life must end here.”

Before he could prep his swing, you pulled away and grabbed the nearest pot, launching it at him, the ceramic breaking against his head making dirt rain down upon both of you.

Not even a second passed before his axe was flying at you, lodging itself into your neck, nearly severing your head from your shoulder. You should’ve been thankful really, thankful that Sungchan had given you a quick death, not his usual route since it was so painless and easy for both the victim and the assailant.

He liked a struggle, but for you he made an exception out of love so that the last thing you’d see was him, your lover, before everything stopped.

[theonlygamergost]

Nature’s effect - Fd!Au

This fanfiction is based on the Family Dynamic au made by @antarctic-bay ctic-bay if you would like to know more, go check them out!!!

Also please bear in mind that the things written in this might not be canon!

This fic was corrected by the lovely @im-default

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Techno started working at the local vivarium and finds out that nature can change and calm even the most hyperactive people, just like Tommy

I did a poll on the Fd!au server about who my next fic should be focused on and Techno/Tommy won, so here you have it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Warning! Swearing

Enjoy~

“I’m sure they’ll love the flowers! Thank you and have a nice day!” Camille waved the last customers off and started cleaning the counter of the rotten leaves and flowers that she had cut off the last order, Techno was kneeling in front of a shelf busy applying tags on products.

“Techno are you almost done with those?”

After saving some flowers from Wilbur’s room, Techno had taken a liking to tend plants and gardening in general, the local vivarium owner Camille had taught him many tips and tricks that made him a perfect employee for the job.

He was pretty hyped for his first day at work, well... it was more of a trial per se, it was a test to see how he would react to the human interactions and how fast he could get the hang of the profession, which went great in his opinion:

Camille was great at explaining how to take care of the plants and wrapping the pots for gifts, she was so elegant while she passed the ribbon around the wrapping paper Techno almost tripped by getting distracted while looking at her.

His job in the magic home of plants was pretty simple: water the plants that weren’t irrigated automatically, check for parasites, diseases, or rotten leaves, restock the expositive plants and help costumers for whatever they needed, and of course, if he didn’t know what to do, just call Camille or any other employee for help.

“You did great today Techno! The old couple you helped earlier seemed very satisfied!” Techno blushed at the compliment since he couldn’t handle them and ended up stuttering, “T-thank you…”

“There are still thirty minutes before we need to close… Are you free to stay a bit later? I can show you how the irrigators system works and where the shelves outside go when closing the shop” He froze as he took his phone out of his pocket.

There where multiple messages coming from none other than the gremlin, and the last three (out of probably twenty all saying “I am bored” and “Answer pig” ) where what caused the strong reaction:

Gremlin

YOu are working at the plant place, right?

Gremlin

Big P and Big W won’t be home till late

Gremlin

Im bored so im coming over

Oh no…

Oh no no no-

“Um... Camille? My brother is at home alone, can he wait for me here until I finish?” The kind girl did not hesitate for a moment, “Absolutely! Not many customers arrive this late so there will be no problem!” Techno released the breath he didn’t notice he was holding, texting angrily back at Tommy, cursing at him to wait until he answered before taking initiations.

Just after he learned how the irrigation system worked, a familiar red and white t-shirt popped into view, “If you want Techno, you can ask your brother to help you take care of the greenhouses, it’s an easy job and you said he was bored at home yes?” Techno nodded and thanked the owner of the vivarium, he walked up to Tommy, who as soon as he saw him, burst into a laugh.

“BWAHAHA!!! WHAT ARE YOU WEARING TECHNO?!” The pink-haired boy looked down at his outfit, which consisted of his school uniform, a pair of green rubber boots, and a cute green apron with a daisy onto it. “What are you laughing at Tommy?” his younger brother was holding his stomach, wiping a tear off of his eyes, “The apron! It’s so- Pffffff-!” Techno sighed, shaking his head, “You are an absolute child… Phil wears an apron when he cooks too and so does Tubbo when he is in art class! How is it funny to you?! It’s a simple piece of clothing!!!” He turned around hoping Tommy would follow, there was no way he was giving him a pair of scissors so a watering can should busy him enough to avoid boredness.

“Hey! I’m not a child! I’m a big man Technoblade you should know” he puffed his chest to look high and mighty, “And how do you not find aprons funny big T?! They are like a little skirt… ok fine ignore me then” noticing how Techno wasn’t turning around nor paying him attention, he followed him to the greenhouses in silence looking at the number of plants and flowers that were littered everywhere.

As soon as Techno stopped he handed Tommy a watering can full of water that he almost dropped, “WHOA- what the hell man?! This is heavy!” Ignoring his brother's complaints, he adjusted his glasses and grabbed a pair of scissors, “Water the third and fifth row, don’t get the leaves wet, pour it directly on the soil and-” Techno turned to face him, “Don’t make a lake in the pot, stop watering as soon as you made a slow circle around the plant” As soon as he finished talking, he kneeled in front of the first plant of the first row, leaving Tommy with a heavy watering can and overcomplicated instructions.

“Don’t make a lake and don’t do this a-and don’t do that gne gne gne… Ugh what a pain in the ass” Tommy started to do as Techno instructed, but as time went on, something in him changed, going from a grunting face and not caring if he poured too much water, to a more relaxed expression, softly moving the leaves aside so water wouldn’t get on them.

Techno didn’t notice this change at first since he was too focused on removing dead flowers and leaves, but when he looked up to check if the gremlin was doing ok, he stopped himself from talking when he noticed that Tommy was crouched down, holding a ladybug in his hands.

Techno smiled at the sight of his brother becoming calmer when in contact with nature, he was so cute…

Quickly snapping a picture and sliding his phone back in his pocket he walked up to him, kneeling as well. “What’cha looking at?”

Tommy didn’t bother looking at his brother, his eyes were fixated on the small bug, “A Ladybug… it has five spots… Does that mean it’s five years old?” Techno softly chuckled, “No, that’s a common misconception Tommy, the spots are to warn predators that they don’t taste good, a self-defense mechanism” Tommy looked up at Techno and back to the ladybug, “But why five?” the older brother spotted another one of the small creatures, he waited for it to walk on his finger and held it close to Tommy’s one, “It represents which species it is, look- they both have five spots, meaning they come from the same category” Tommy added nothing, too absorbed into admiring the small bug pacing around the palm of his hand, instead, Techno placed his one back on the plant, snipping away a molded leaf, “Farmers believe that if they find a ladybug with less than seven spots means that they’ll have a good harvest, the contrary if it has more than seven, it’s only a folk legend though” Tommy decided to follow suit and moved his hand closer to the plan, allowing the small red and black insect to go back on the plant it came from.

“C’mon, your watering can’s empty, let’s go fill it up” The blonde boy smiled and nodded, grabbing the empty plastic container and following his older brother, looking at the variety of flowers and plants the greenhouse sheltered.

The rest of the time spent tending to the plants was calm and relaxing, nature really changed Tommy since he didn’t say once that he was bored or he never tried to start an argument, he looked at peace watering the small plants, kneeling to smell the flowers and making sure they weren’t diseased.

“Do you want to cut off the brown leaves? You look like you want to look at the plants a bit closer, I can water the rest” Tommy was surprised when Techno held in front of him the pair of scissors, he hesitated for a second, making sure that his brother was confident in his decision, but all he got from Techno was a soft smile.

Tommy remained in this unusual state all the way back home, let’s say that this moment of… “peace” was ruined when Wilbur came home and showed Tommy the picture Techno took of him behind his back.

[lizacstuff]

Can’t wait to read you thoughts on this episode. Eda and Serkan are getting engaged! ngl seeing the rings did something to me, I haven’t recovered yet.

I KNOW!!!!! I missed the rings so much. When folks were upset during the filming of 20 when it became apparent he wasn't wearing the ring anymore, I remember saying that they have to take them off so they can put them back on for real, and it will be oh so sweet when they do. Flashforward six weeks and YES!!!! Just seeing those rings again is sweet we're going to die when they actually slip them on during the next episode. I'm not attached to any of my own jewelry the way I'm attached to their rings, lmao.

As a whole this episode was very enjoyable for me.  The new writers clearly realized they needed a mood change after episode 25, and I was thrilled to see the show return to its roots. The tone felt more like the first batch of episodes than any in recent memory. What a relief. Also I've said prior to this that I suspected that where we would feel Ayse's absence was in the humor and lack of sparkle.  Well I thought this episode had plenty of both, so I stand corrected. The first Edser scene with Serkan gliding by Eda without saying a word and then having his trusty sidekick Leyla keep an eye on what they were doing outside set the light comedic tone and put everything on the right footing from the get go. 

More later on Edser, let's start with all the nonsense they use to fill the rest of the 2+ hours. 

(continue under the read more)

What in the frack is Babaanne's endgame?  Does she have one?  Is it to take revenge on Serkan? To get Eda back in her orbit? Or just to cause chaos? Or is she testing them? Not sure. 

I enjoyed the scene between mom and son, Aydan and Serkan's relationship has really become one of the best on the show, certainly better than recent Eda/Ayfer.  Which is interesting, because in the pilot they established that while Serkan may be rich with material things, he was lacking in love and emotional familial support, while Eda was poor in regards to material things, but was surrounded by love in the form of her family/friends. Though perhaps one of the greatest gifts Eda's given Serkan is an improved relationship with his mother, and the impetus to distance himself from his unloving father. While Serkan has inspired her growing independence from her aunt. 

Speaking of them, let's move on to Aydan and Ayfer. PLEASE MADE THIS CHEF NONSENSE END! Good grief. I really don't enjoy watching these two ladies making total asses of themselves over this douche. Both of them trying to catch him on his jog and then going along with his aikido nonsense. It feels like he's just playing with them for his own amusement. Both deserve better and I don't even like Ayfer. Also if my boss gave me a single red rose for being employee of the month, I'd find that both creepy and hella disappointing (crash prizes please.) 

Meanwhile Ayfer is still testing my last nerve. When Aydan and Seyfi show up and inform her that they've found out that Serkan and Eda broke up and she responds with, "Were they even together to break up?" I wanted to slap her upside the head. Whatever official relationship status Eda and Serkan have, they have been connected and in a romantic relationship this entire time. The bit of time jump at the start of 15 before she goes back to work for Efe, is really the only section of time since they've met where they weren't in a relationship. And while Eda isn't all that forthcoming with Ayfer when it comes to Serkan, she hasn't really hidden it well. It was at Ayfer's birthday when they were on the ice together being very romantic, Ayfer was at Aydan's 70s party and could very well see Eda and Serkan attached at the hip all night and wound around one another intimately slow dancing, Ayfer knows Eda spent the night at Serkan's when she left because of Babaanne, Ayfer was at the NY party and saw them together there. Not to mention Ayfer knows Serkan saved her business and why, she knows Serkan was still wearing his ring, and she knows Eda looked completely shattered over leaving Serkan as Ayfer heartlessly reacted with glee in the last episode. 

So asking "were they even together" just completely diminishes what Eda is currently going through, as if parting with him is no big deal because there was nothing there to begin with, when she knows better. When she's seen it with her own two eyes. Seriously.. fuck her. Every other character who is a friend of Eda and Serkan all know that they're a unit. I don't even feel bad that she came to ArtLife to beg for Eda's company, but Eda ended up blowing her off. Surprising Serkan with a proposal was a much better use of her time.

Engin and Piril, yeeesh, I feel for Piril, trying to put off this meeting. I'm sure she's thinking it's for Engin's own good, but her flipping into total bitch mode when they're newlyweds... not great. Not an auspicious start to the marriage. Even if she wants to keep Engin away from her father, she ought to confide in Engin and tell him why she's freaked. I'm assuming we'll get more of that in the next episode since Engin is looking rough in those promo stills. 

My favorite side plot was probably Grandog's henchman's (what is his name?) crush on Melo. Melo deserves to be crushed on, and I love that she is so uninterested that she doesn't see it.  Much more fun to have him chasing her, and her being oblivious. Poor Leyla, trying in vain to get his attention when he only has eyes for Melo. Enjoyed that Melo and Leyla made the agreement that Melo would help Leyla get the dude and Leyla would help get rid of Erdem. I'm looking forward to see where this goes. 

Ceren and Ferit... were there too. 

Now onto the A story (and let's be real the only one that matters) Eda and Serkan. Obviously 25 left us off in a very sad, heartbroken place. I'm not sure what decisions were made, when or why, but at some point TPTB decided they needed to get back to their roots and thank goodness. Episode 25 was just so dark, Eda was miserable the entire episode, as was Serkan, and that's not fun to watch for 2 hours. The way they handled them here is much better. 

I know some feel the tone shift was too much. To that I would say, it was so dark in ep 25, I'm happy to do a 180, no matter the reason, to get back to a place where watching is fun, and also I think of the breakup as Eda throwing the breaks on a runaway train and once she did, and she was sure the train was stopped at least for the time being, then she could take a moment, reassess the situation and potentially decide it wasn’t as dire as she thought. In the last episode, every moment Eda delayed giving that old bitty what she wanted, something catastrophic befell Serkan, his business, or his family. The pressure mounted, the stakes were high and in the end she had to do whatever was necessary to stop Babaanne's assault on Serkan. 

This episode we saw her catch her breath and then formulate a plan. I think a tone shift fits with that. Of course she feels lighter knowing that even though she hurt Serkan, he's protected for the moment. Now that that's taken care of, she's ready for next steps. So it works that the next morning we see her telling Melo and Ceren that she's not going to give up Serkan, and outlining her plan around getting close to Babaanne in order to get something on her. Good girl!  

As I said above, I just adored that first scene outside ArtLife. The girls gathered around, trying to warn Eda that Serkan was coming, and then his walk by where he KNEW EXACTLY WHAT HE WAS DOING when he got right up in Eda's business without even looking at her.  He knows what makes her weak in the knees. And I love that Serkan decided to play it like this. HE KNOWS. He knows she loves him, he knows there's more to the breakup, and he knows how to deal with it. Drive her crazy until she cracks and tells him everything. OR drive her crazy until they end in a passionate, possessive sex explosion. One or the other.  

Quick poll, who didn't love watching Serkan take back the reigns of his company? This gal did. YAAAAAAAAAAASSSSS. Alpha Serkan is back. Kick the old bag's throne to the curb. Kick the old bag's creepy client to the curb. Now we just have to kick the old bag and her deranged, obsessed sidekick to the curb as well.  But for now, I loved seeing him at the end of the table, making decisions, not brooking opposition. The team squabbling over his decision, but he just sits back, unbothered. Total power move. I appreciate Ferit questioning the decision, questioning it is the right thing to do in his position, but he may have gotten a little too pissy about it. Dude, this entire company IS Serkan. The success of the company is due to his talent, his vision, his business acumen. I get they're all worried he's making a decision because of Eda, but he's got a proven track record of, you know, being right, so there's no reason to get shirty. If Serkan doesn't want to work with someone, his instinct is probably on target.

Eda getting Babaanne to stand down warmed me from the inside out. I find it interesting that she used the argument that they were pushing him too hard and he didn't deserve it, and Babaanne bought it. For one I think Eda was worried Serkan was going to snap and do something that might start Babs' Bolat revenge cycle again. For two, she just wants the love of her life to win and be calm. However, if anyone in that room didn't catch onto what happened there, that Eda and BigB leave and then come back a minute later and BigB has done a 180, I question their competence. *cough* Ferit *cough* He's just not the sharpest tool in the shed. However, obviously, Serkan knew. 

On another note, they've gotten pretty murky with the line between ArtLife and the holding.  Babaanne has 45% of the Holding, not ArtLife. Ferit has 5% of the holding, not ArtLife. So which company was working with the Prince?  Since it was a project to design a house, seems like that should be ArtLife? But Babs and Ferit seemed to think they had a vote which they shouldn't if it's ArtLife.  Who knows... whatever. 

Have you ever seen anything cuter than Eda in her coat and boots and protective helmet, leaning over, clutching her chest, exhausted after climbing all those stairs?  I mean she's an adorable bean just bent over and huffing and puffing, but the fact that she just climbed up goodness knows how many flights of stairs (judging by that view, an impossible number, but we'll allow it) just to see Serkan?  We giggle at her excuse that she did that because he gave her too much work. Eda, he's not going to buy that, luckily none of us want him to buy it. These two, they can't stay away from each other. Ever. She was also probably worried after the foreman told her he'd been up there for hours. Again, I think she's concerned that she's pushed him too far. So now she's in Serkan's shoes after the first breakup. Navigating that push pull of wanting to be with him, but sticking to the decision to end it for his sake. 

It's nice to see that her claustrophobia was not "cured" after going up in the elevator with Serkan one-time. On her own, she's still not able to face it. I'm sure she could do it again with him, but there's more work to be done before she can face it without him. 

Serkan was surprisingly vulnerable in both his conversation with Engin and with Eda on the top of that skyscraper. Even just telling Engin he was too out of sorts to join him for lunch, tells us that while he knows what he's doing, he knows there's more to the story, but he's still hurting and unsettled after the breakup. Then, "I create to make people happy, but I myself can't be happy. It's strange." Oh Serkan. I think you ripped my heart out with that... Eda's too. 

Eda was so discombobulated by Serkan's attitude. Whatever she expected from him, his acceptance of the break up, wasn't it. His proposal that they be "friends" threw her and she looked so distressed when he said, "Everyone will live their own life." Alarm bells started going off for her, much as they did for him at the top of ep 19 when Eda said she was going to start living her life. She did NOT like the idea of Serkan Bolat out there living a life that didn't include her, lmao. 

It's crazy to me that Eda has a friend like Fifi, who probably breaks and enters for a living, and yet she chooses Melo for a clandestine operation. Come on, Eda, you got to choose the right person for the job, lmao. I also question Eda's choice of cat burglar wardrobe. Seemed a bit... restricting and flashy. Though her skin-tight, snakeskin breaking-and-entering dress and fashionable trespassing boots did make it easier to transition to fine dining and driving your man towards rambunctious breakup/makeup/jealousy sex.  Not much to say about the restaurant scenes. The prince is creepy af, and was that the most awkward dance.... ever? The looks back and forth between Edser were excellent, so much tension and longing and jealousy. But boy is it hard to watch a scene with Balca in it, ugh she makes my skin crawl and I don’t even like looking at her. Also the deliberate way the actress has chosen to speak is irritating. Anyway, we now know Balca is pretty much capable of anything, if she’s capable of essentially poisoning the man she thinks she loves. Yikes. Did Nana realize that Balca poisoned him? I have to believe she did, because him being sick seemed part of the plan. THEY'RE ALL FULL EVIL!!! .

One thing I don't believe is that Eda Yildiz would ever walk out of that restaurant with Serkan looking that bad. No way she leaves him to Balca's care, or anyone else's for that matter. Nope, regardless of who was watching she would have insisted on taking him to the doctor herself.  But I get they were setting up the plot, so they sacrificed that bit. 

These villains are really bad at driving a wedge between two people who love each other. AngryGran is all like, "I know a foolproof plan, let's put them in the same room and get 'em all riled up with jealousy, then make Serkan sick so Eda's worried, then I'll convince her to go check on him and let's see what happens!" LMAO. Cheers to you, dumbasses, you brought us a whole heaping plate full of S.E.X. They were really banking that Eda was going to fly off the handle and think that Serkan went from an allergic reaction to sexing up the new obsessed employee very quickly. It's great that they all underestimate Eda and Serkan's relationship and connection, that should continue to help Edser as long as these fools continue to meddle. 

Eda was, wait for it, LEGENDARY, in her smackdown of Balca. QUEEEEEEEN. I'll never be over the, "You can only be with a statue of Serkan, darling." BWAHAHAHAHA. Yes! Throw her creepy, inappropriate present back in her face. And Balca's gall asking Eda to leave and then continually lecture Eda that they'd broken up. That takes either big cajones or huge helpings of delusion, because Balca has very little information when it comes to their relationship, yet she's playing her hand like she knows it all and like she doesn't care what gets back to Serkan. However, got to hand it to Balca for keeping her composure once Eda saw through her little staged production, because her story was painfully weak. Let's say for real that you're at your boss's house, the boss is sick so you're hanging around downstairs by yourself just to make sure everything is okay. What's the problem with just... you know... wearing your outfit with a coffee stain?  Unless you had a massive big gulp sized coffee and poured it over your head, why even change? Don't you just... live with the stain? It's not like you're making a presentation to the board of directors in 5 minutes.  For the love of god you're sitting there and no one else is around. Weak alibi.  

Poor Serkan, he's just there trying to sleep off having his allergies maliciously triggered, and he completely misses out on the love of his life fighting for him downstairs. Oh how he would have loved to see that. But oh what a way to wake up, with Eda Yildiz standing over him, looking magnificent, and rousing him with a scolding tone. I've already talked about how HOT the jealousy and possessiveness was here, so I'll focus on the scene itself. 

Let’s talk about the fragman first. Due to the short production timeline of this show, when they create a trailer they're doing it from the dailies, not from the show itself. That part of the show usually hasn't even been edited yet so the fragman exists before the episode. That means often there are scenes or angles that appear in the fragman, but not in the episode. It happened bigtime with the shower scene in 19, it happened randomly with the fragman for 20, they showed that really great shot of heartbroken Serkan in red, but didn't show the full thing in the episode, (when giffing it I had to use the fragman) and here, several of the best shots of Eda and Serkan ripping each other's clothes off were in the fragman and didn't make the episode. We can live with it for a lonely Serkan shot, but it's quite a bait and switch in this instance. Especially when pretty much every member of the cast (except Hande, Kerem didn't post anything either, but he did appear in that IGlive where the cast mercilessly teased him about it) promoted the scene. Not cool. I realize that they're dealing with sensors and may have had to cut things in order to avoid fines and such, but then they probably should have found a way to release the uncut scene on the internet as I've read other Turkish shows have done and like they did with episode 13. If you're gonna put something like this in the fragman to entice viewers, and have the cast promote it, you need to be willing to deliver. Badly done on the part of both Fox and MF Yapim.

That being said, one of the great things about the tighter restrictions this show has to adhere to, is they really show the intimacy instead. On an American show, these characters would have started eating each other's faces off and then tumbled into bed. There is something very hot, though, about them just invading each other's space, breathing each other's scent, nose to nose, nose to neck, nose to cheek... without breaching. Plus we got to see him carry her to the bed... even if they darkened it to the point you can barely see. I saw enough. HOT. The scene was short, but more tantalizing than lots of love scenes I've seen.

I was sad she left while he still slept in the morning. For him not to feel her get out of bed, she must have worn him out! It really would have been nice to see them wake up together, but I'm sure that will come. Plus it gave us the tension filled scene in the office. The knocked over lamp in the background was a delicious detail. Things got rambunctious! I'm glad Eda got to return the sentiment that only she can touch him, if only Serkan had heard it! Another thing that would have made him so happy if only he knew about it.

Melo is all of us upon learning about their night of passion. She's a whole cheerleader for them, and I love it. 

The post-sex scenes at the office were amazing. For several seconds I thought that he really did think it was a dream. Panic started to set in until she admitted she'd had it too. Phew. No hiding for Eda. I'm glad he flirted, instead of getting offended, and that she was at least honest about there being something she needed to do before they could really be together. Eda also handled the office conversation with Balca well. Love that she didn't show any reaction to her claim about Paris, just wished her a good trip. I felt that deep breath she took before going into his office. Yes, girl, calm down before you march in and accuse him of something, good thing he immediately invited her. I just about melted at, "I don't want to argue... you're precious to me." Serkan is gradually learning how to head off her fits of pique. 

The proposal... I... just... okay... my heart... I need a minute... still not over it. 

It was perfect. She made a surprise for him!!!!  After he asked her for a surprise a few episodes ago she did it and surpassed even his wildest dreams. It was quite a surprise for us too! Thank you for not spoiling it, show!  Serkan has told Eda he loves her about 3 dozen different ways, he's made it clear how he feels and what he wants ("Eda Bolat, sounds nice."). There is no doubt that he was ready to propose the moment he felt she'd be receptive, so it was wonderful that she threw caution to the wind and did it. Both Serkan and the audience needed to see exactly how much she loves him, and this was a wonderful way to do that. It's pretty much the biggest thing she could have done.  Also for those of us in other parts of the world (I'm in the US) it might not be too out of the ordinary for a woman to propose, but from what I understand it's rare and possibly non-existent on Turkish shows. That's pretty cool.

Did you see his face!?!? He was so happy at first when he registered that she was actually standing in front of him and then just totally gobsmacked when he saw the rings and realized what was happening. As for Eda, she was just glowing. GLOWING. And don't even get me started on the plane. That trip on the day after they met is such an important part of their love story and the call back here is wonderful. The first time around he thought she was there for him, this time he can't believe that she's there for him.  

Can't wait to see the way the full conversation/proposal plays out, do ya'll think he'll say yes? (hee)

[transsergio]

Emotions That I Simply Do Not Have (Read on AO3)

Chapter 3 - His And Hers, For Better Or Worse Chapter 2 - I'm Not Gonna Repeat Myself Chapter 1 - More Like A Relapse

Penemily + Hotchreid / Mature / 2011 words in this chapter

Emily and Penelope put their plan into motion; Spencer arrives. (This is the final chapter of this fic! thank you to everyone who kept up with it this week!)

Hotch’s advances stop. Or, become marginally less obvious.

In his third text this week, Hotch asks, “Do you need anything from break room?” It is only Tuesday. Emily knows that if she lifts her head, she will see his beady black eyes through the glass. He’ll be staring at her, hoping to see her fingers working over her tiny keys, telling him that yes, she’d appreciate a bottle of water or any other menial task that will bring him out to the bullpen. She’d rather text Penelope to peek through the security cameras, to see exactly how far their one-night stand has gotten her. Yes, sleeping with the boss comes with great advantages, like your office becoming a cage.

Emily does her paperwork in silence. She’s hellbent on leaving at four forty-five, no matter what Hotch might throw at her to keep her in his line of sight. At four thirty, Emily turns off her cell’s ringer. She is escaping to her salvation, a night of face masks and a season rerun of the Bachelor with her girlfriend. As she closes down her computer and organizes her files, she glances about. Derek is long gone, citing a date with his television, couch, and dog. Reid finished his work hours ago, but plays chess against himself until Emily’s ready to head out together. And JJ is on a phone call, likely with Will, likely about to tell their son she’ll be home a little late again. Emily doesn’t see Rossi, but at his age, you never know how many bathroom breaks he’ll need.

As Emily rises with her back to Hotch’s door, Reid follows. They head to the elevators. She’s excited to dish about her later plans, as Spencer is her only known ally outside of Penelope. In return, Spencer tells her about his last date.

“You’re saying he forced you to make eye contact?” Emily asks as the elevator encapsulates them.

“Yeah. It was the most uncomfortable dinner I’ve had yet. Every time I was looking elsewhere while I spoke, he’d say, ‘Eyes on me.’ I don’t think we’ll be going out again,” Spencer adds with a chuckle.

Emily raises her eyebrows. “No kidding. Maybe we could get him on some kind of watchlist for bad first impressions.”

“I wouldn’t go that far, but I did block his number before the night was over.”

Emily laughs and bumps Spencer with her elbow. “I don’t blame you.”

The elevator dings and releases them on the parking level. Emily makes for her car and Spencer for the subway, despite Emily’s repeat offer to drop Spencer off herself. A part of her is glad, though. She wants to get home fast and not leave a second empty.

By home, of course, she means Penelope’s apartment in all its purple and glitter. They’re settled in her living room by five-thirty, television hooked up and face masks elegantly adorned, a blanket solidifying them as one happy mass. They plow through three episodes before they remember the masks could’ve come off halfway through the first, and that they haven’t ordered dinner.

“Pizza sound good?” Emily emerges from their cocoon, stretches, and finds Penelope’s stash of takeout menus in the kitchen.

Penelope joins her at the counter. “Hm. Maybe Thai? Wait, what’s with the face?”

“Nothing.” Emily tries to mask her shudder. “Just… Hotch, he mentioned something about Thai in one of his messages.”

“What, did it give him diarrhea?” Penelope teases. She looks for Emily’s little smile and the crease between her eyebrows, the sign that Penelope was funny even if Emily won’t admit it. It doesn’t come. Penelope recalibrates. “No worries. We'll get something else then.”

“I’m sick of it, Pen,” Emily says. She slaps the menus down. “If he’s making my job harder and me less effective, why should I stay in the department? Our communication is horrible, I’m agitated in the field, and I can’t get him to stop. I’m running out of options.”

“Okay, slow down.” Penelope rubs Emily’s back in light, soothing circles. “You’re hungry and fed up, and you have every right to be, but let’s have some food before making big decisions like leaving the job that lets me call you every hour. I’ll pick. You get comfy. Go, shoo.” And she scoots Emily into the living room with a pat on the ass.

“Fine,” Emily raises her hands in surrender, “fine, I’m going.”

When dinner arrives (gyros from the Mediterranean place a couple blocks over), Emily devours hers. It’s gone before Penelope can pry the foil from her own meal, and Emily’s head is where her plate used to be.

“Oh, Angel,” Penelope sympathizes. “It’s going to be fine.”

Emily nods against the table. “Yeah, I think so. But I don’t want him fired. He’s a good leader, and he needs this job. His wife died, and before that they were in witness protection. That’s got to do something to a person, right? He risked everything and he lost it all.”

Penelope chews thoughtfully. “Maybe we don’t need to get Hotch fired, but we can play it like survival of the fittest – as long as you’re faster than somebody else, he won’t catch you.”

“What?”

“I was watching this thing on the Discovery channel about jungle cats hunting and how they go for the weakest of the pack. It was really sad because you don’t want the lions to starve and at the same time you don’t want the antelope to die, but that’s not the point. If we latch him onto someone else, he’ll forget all about you.” Penelope wipes her hands clean. “Like magic, you’re free!”

For a moment, Emily has hope. Of course they can hook him up with someone else. It’s what every classic sitcom Emily raised herself on has implemented. There’s only one problem. “We don’t know any single straight women.”

A wicked smile flashes across Penelope’s face. “Who said anything about a woman?”

*

“Are you sure you want to do this? A workplace relationship is exactly what I’m running from,” Emily says.

Spencer’s voice crackles over the line. “It’s honestly fine. According to the exit polls of the 2008 elections, about four percent of Americans were gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Roughly one-hundred and thirty-one point three million people voted. If every vote counted also answered that exit poll, that would be approximately five million, two-hundred and fifty-two thousand people identifying as such.”

“Yeah?”

“Hotch could be one of them, is all I’m saying.”

“Right. But I want to be sure you’re comfortable.”

“Emily, I promise. I wouldn’t be going if I couldn’t handle it. Besides, if he’s as straight as he looks, we’ll have awkward small talk and I’ll go home. It won’t kill me.”

“If you say so. Oh, I’ve got to go, Spence. Good luck,” Emily says. She snaps her phone shut and turns.

Penelope stands in her kitchen with two glasses of wine. She wears neon pink lingerie, a 1960’s inspired sheer robe with fur trim, layered over a matching slip.

“You’ve got to go?” Penelope sips her glass and leaves a pink lipstick print around the rim. “You’re going to leave me here all alone?”

Emily bites her lip. “Not a chance.”

*

An hour later, Emily and Penelope are curled around one another in Penelope’s lavender sheets. They’re sweaty, warm, and flushed.

“And you thought I couldn’t take your mind off it,” Penelope smirks. Her bragging is part bravado; she’s honestly glad Emily didn’t rip her robe to pieces.

“Eh,” Emily pants. “All part of my plan. I know how you love to be right.” And wow, did it ever feel so good to be wrong.

Penelope giggles and toys with Emily’s hair. She loves this part especially. When it’s just them, sleepy and well cared for, and Emily seems so defenseless. Her eyes are softer, her muscles lighter, and she lets Penelope put her loose strands into tiny braids. But this time, one of their ringers pops the bubble.

Emily hoists herself up and snatches her cell phone from the nightstand.

She turns to Penelope and mouths, “It’s Spence.”

Penelope hisses back, “Put him on speaker, dummy!”

So she does. The voices on the other end are muffled by fabric. It’s as if the phone is being rolled through a load of laundry. Penelope fumbles for the mute button and silences their side.

“It’s a butt-dial,” she says, her heart beating as rapidly as it was just minutes ago. “Oh my god, we really are secret agents.”

Emily tries not to encourage her. It’s thrilling, obviously, but her stomach twists. They’re invading Spencer’s privacy. “We should hang up.”

“Yeah, we really should,” Penelope agrees. Emily reaches for the red button that will disconnect them when they finally hear clearly.

“Um, is Jack home?” Spencer wonders.

“No, he’s with Jessica. If this is about a case, I don’t need to chance him hearing the details.”

“Actually,” Spencer coughs, “this is more of a… personal matter.”

“Oh? What’s up?” Hotch sounds genuine enough. He probably thinks of Spencer like a son. Emily wants to pull Spencer out and abort the plan. This is too far.

“I noticed you and Prentiss haven’t been cooperating well lately.” Spencer says, so naturally. “Emily’s my friend, and I was wondering if there’s anything I can do to help?”

A beat passes. “No, nothing that I’m aware of.” Hotch answers. “I respect you and your intentions, Spencer, but I don’t know—”

Spencer is curt. “I think you do.”

“I do, what?”

“You know. I think you might be the problem actually, sir.”

When Hotch doesn’t respond, Spencer continues. “I think you and Emily have a sexual history together. I think you’ve been trying to repeat that history, and she doesn’t want to. I think you’re looking for a way to forget Haley while you grieve her, and that you believe Emily is the solution. In reality, you’re looking for someone to dominate and let you feel in control while your life spirals out from under you, and for someone who will reject you so these wishes go unfulfilled and you aren’t at fault – the other party is. I think it stems from the guilt you feel regarding Haley’s death, both in that you blame yourself for making her a target, and that you couldn’t stop Foyet from killing her.”

Emily and Penelope exchange glances. Spencer has said everything the team considered privately, and tied it back to Prentiss in one neat, factual statement. All that was left was the aspect the team couldn’t predict; how Hotch would react.

“Do you want a drink, Reid?”

What?

“Uh, sure? What- what kind?”

“I have scotch, lemonade, and Juicy Juice.”

“Lemonade sounds good.”

“Good.”

Dishes clatter as Hotch pours for them. Emily and Penelope wait, hanging up completely disregarded.

A cushion wheezes nearby. Hotch’s voice is now much closer. They can feel his vibrato through the tinny speakers. He asks, “Are you confident in your profile?”

Spencer takes a gulp of his drink. “Fairly so, sir, yes.”

“And if I asked you to prove it?”

“Sir?”

“You’re positing that I want to dominate someone and simultaneously, am hoping to be rejected. If you’re right, I’ll make my move and be discouraged when you give me the go-ahead. Maybe I’ll even have a breakdown. Sobbing, psychosis, the works. Do you want to find out?”

“Okay,” Penelope throws up her hands. “This feels icky again. No. Uh-uh. I don’t wanna know.”

Emily shushes her sharply. They’ve just missed a piece of the conversation. “Hold on, hold on.”

“And you’re sure about this?” Hotch questions.

“I’m sick of everyone asking me that.” The other line rustles into white noise. Briefly, it clears. They hear two gasps and what has to be the fumble of bodies.

Hotch rasps, “Come upstairs.”

“And that’s enough!” Penelope slaps the cell phone shut. “I need some air.”

“No kidding.” Emily shakes her head. “Maybe I missed my shot.”

“You take that back.”

Emily leans into her girlfriend, grinning all the while. “Make me.”

[snkpolls]

SnK Episode 69 Poll Results (for Manga Readers)

The poll closed with 200 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Manga Readers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll, click here.

--

RATE THE EPISODE 193 responses

The anime continues on with it’s hot streak, with episode 69 receiving only 1 vote in the negative direction. The vast majority were very pleased with this episode. 

this time the pacing felt quite weird, specially with how they managed the flashbacks. sorry mappa, but for the first time i feel like this was a 7/10 episode

nice i guess.

Beautifully done

It was great especially the confession part hahah

I love MAPPA's takes on the series so far!

Overall, very good episode. MAPPA is doing a great job. 

i liked it!

A little iffy but still solid.

WHICH MOMENT FROM THE PRESENT TIME WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 194 responses

There were many significant moments in this episode, so we opted to divvy up the options. For favorite moments during the present time, Eren’s harsh tone with Hange garnered the highest amount of votes at 34.5%. Not far behind, 26.3% most enjoyed watching the 104th talk about Eren and what happened in Marley. Behind those two scenes were Hange asking Eren why he was talking to himself in the mirror (12.4%), and getting the small zevi crumbs at the end of the episode (8.2%).

WHICH MOMENT FROM THE KIYOMI FLASHBACK WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 192 responses

For the flashback where the Survey Corps meets Kiyomi, nearly half of the fandom (43.2%) were ecstatic to finally see the scene between Historia and Mikasa animated. 24% most enjoyed Eren’s rejection of Zeke’s plan in Historia’s defense. 14.6% were immersed in Hange’s dismay at considering making Historia continue the cycle of children eating their parents, and 12.5% were thrilled to finally see Mikasa reveal her tattoo to Kiyomi. 

Tfw you think MAPPA cut Kiyomi’s drooling scene due to tv lag and later you find out the scene was changed to something equivalent: O__O 

5head pixis made me laugh

WHICH MOMENT FROM THE RAILROAD FLASHBACK WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 193 responses

Eren’s confession at the end of the railroad flashback took the most attention from fans, with 41.5% enjoying that portion the most. 20.2% enjoyed the 104th all discussing who is most suited to inherit Eren’s titan. 19.2% got a kick out of seeing smol Armin chasing around smol Sasha, and 13% were happy to see Levi (and his annoyance that everyone is taller than him). 

Armin's :o face was just adorable! Had forgotten it from the manga

MIKASA REVEALS THE AZUMABITO CLAN SYMBOL AS A TATTOO ON THE TOP OF HER WRIST. THIS IS A RETCON FROM SEASON 1 WHEN WIT REPLACED THE BRANDING WITH EMBROIDERY INSTEAD. THOUGH THE TATTOO IS WHAT’S FAITHFUL TO THE MANGA (MIKASA’S MANGA COUNTERPART HAS ALWAYS HAD THIS), WAS THIS A GOOD DECISION ON MAPPA’S PART? 192 responses

When it comes to the tattoo retcon, opinions seem to be relatively mixed. 22.9% of respondents felt that the retcon was a good move, because they feel that faithfulness to the source material is the most important thing in an adaptation. 21.9% felt it was a mixed situation, because they appreciate faithfulness to the manga, but also prefer for things to have proper continuity. 20.8% agreed that it was a good move, but mainly because the embroidery was “lame and forgettable” anyway. At smaller percentages, 16.1% felt that it wasn’t really a big deal either way since the family symbol was acknowledged regardless, and 9.4% didn’t care at all.

Mix of 3 and last point

Yes because faithfulness to the source material is important and I don't think the existence of the embroidery means that the branding didn't also exist.

No: continuity issues in the anime, but Yes: the embroidery thing was stupid.

1) we never saw the embroidery being kept by mikasa 2) kiyomi could have thought they just found it and stole it from the shogun's descendants' tombs or something. we as manga readers know mikasa is truly a descendant of the shogun, but anime onlies would have thought it could be possible for kiyomi not to trust them. so a tattoo is the best choice

Yes, MAPPA made a good decision. The anime onlies probably don't even remember the embroidery thing anyway. 

Bruh, if I hadn't read the manga, I would've forgotten the Mikasa mom scene.

Options one and two.

HYPOTHETICALLY, IF ONE OF THE 104TH WERE TO INHERIT EREN’S TITAN POWER, WHO DO YOU THINK WOULD BE THE BEST OPTION? 191 responses

The notable majority of respondents feel that Jean would have been the best candidate to inherit Eren’s titan. At a distant second, people would opt for Armin to inherit Eren’s titans (perhaps because he is already a titan anyway). The rest of the characters were relatively evenly chosen.

WHICH “SHIPPY” MOMENT FROM THE EPISODE WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 193 responses

This piechart turned out to be very colorful. Nearly a quarter of respondents couldn’t choose just one moment, so they voted for “all of them.” Behind that, 14.5% most enjoyed the scene where Eren showed determination to ensure Historia wouldn’t have to be sacrificed, 13.5% swooned over Eren and Mikasa’s blushy glances at each other, and 11.9% most enjoyed Connie and Sasha’s increasingly awkward conversation about who’s the bigger idiot. 

I loved the Erehisu moments 

sasha and connie <3<3<3

Erehisu canon

MAPPA DIDN’T INCLUDE THE PART OF THE CONVERSATION BETWEEN ZEKE AND KIYOMI WHERE ZEKE EXPLAINS HIS PARENTAGE, WHY HE SOLD THEM OUT, AND CLAIMS THAT HE’S THE “TRUE ELDIAN RESTORATIONIST.” THOUGHTS? 192 responses

The conversation between Zeke and Kiyomi got shaved down quite a bit, losing the claim of Zeke being “the true Eldian restorationist.” 30.7% aren’t sweating about it and feel it’s something that will be included in a later episode. 27.6% feel that it’s removal isn’t a big deal. 18.7%, on the other hand, feel that losing that moment watered down Zeke’s characterization and would have preferred its inclusion. 8.9% don’t care. 

I feel it will be brought up next episode

I think leaving it out makes the moment with ksaver telling him to sacrifice his parents more impactful to the anime onlies.  

they may have prepared an anime original scene where this is explained, probably at some point. this chapter was loaded with tons of info

I think everything zeke is going to be saved for his big flashback after losing to levi

Maybe they'll include it at the part where Zeke has his flashbacks when he was injured by Levi.

MAPPA ALSO LEFT OUT THE PART OF THE 104TH’S CONVERSATION WHERE ARMIN THEORIZES THAT EREN WOULD BE IN CONTROL OF THE COORDINATE ONCE HE AND ZEKE MAKE CONTACT. THOUGHTS ABOUT THAT? 185 responses

Another dialogue that was axed this episode was Armin brainstorming about who would be in control of the Founding Titan if Eren and Zeke make contact with each other. 35.7% (a small jump from the previous question) feel that this, again, will be included in a later episode. 28.1% feel that its inclusion wasn’t wholly necessary. 18.4% feel that this fact was already obvious anyway, so it doesn’t matter. 10.4% feel that the anime will get to that point so quickly that the exposition isn’t necessary to begin with. 

Armin's motives don't necessarily change either way so I'm fine with the cut. I do hope it's mentioned later on though.

Every episode is only 25 minutes long, so some parts of dialogues need to be removed. 

I honestly think they're going to retcon this so zeke's reverse uno in chap 120 doesn't seem so wild

I do understand that they need to make cuts (and there's still to many manga chapters to fit in the rest of the season) but that one was really important bc they might not explain it fully later on

If they animate Zeke's backstory, it will be there. It would've been nice to show Armin still using his brain though.

DO YOU THINK EREN SEEMED MORE INTIMIDATING IN THE MANGA OR THE ANIME? 191 responses

Manbun Eren was introduced as being intimidating, cold, and generally mean. His outburst at Hange was the first of many examples of this behavior as he lashed out at them for having no good ideas. 65.4% of respondents felt that MAPPA did a much better job at portraying Eren as a much more intimidating figure than Isayama did.

IN RETROSPECT, DO YOU FEEL THAT EREN WAS TOO HARSH ON HANGE? 190 responses

Almost a total opposite from the previous pie graph, 66.3% of respondents felt that Eren was much too harsh on Hange, given the circumstances and their dwindling options.

DO YOU THINK THAT, EVEN AFTER READING CHAPTER 123, PARADIS COULD HAVE FOUND ANOTHER WAY TO RESOLVE THEIR ISSUES THAN THE PATH THAT EREN TOOK? 191 responses

One of the constant questions in the manga since the timeskip is “could there been another way?” 59.7% think it’s just a solid maybe, and that there’s no longer any way to know that now that Eren has stripped Paradis of all their options. 23.6% feel that the rumbling was the inevitable outcome against a world that would never give them a chance. 14.1% feel the opposite, however, and believe there was always another way, and that Eren didn’t give them enough time to figure it out. 

I wonder what would happen if eren talked about his future memories 

There is always another way than violence. The problem is that no one on Paradis was able to find it.

Maybe we will find out in the last 2 chapters, this might be correlated to a possible "the mist" ending that Isayama originally planned

Who even knows? All I know is that there was too much distrust, secrecy and mystery for anyone to get anything done before shit hit the fan and now here we are. I also think it was a huge mistake to keep Eren so isolated.

There's no good way and never only on path but eren choose one who solve the problem

WE’RE GONNA ASK THIS… WHO IS THE FATHER? 196 responses

The never ending debate of who the father of Historia’s child hasn’t slowed down since the introduction of her pregnancy, though the question has ultimately boiled down to whether the child is Eren’s or not. Only 33.2% of respondents seem to think so. 28.1% presumably feel that it’s not Eren, but are overall tired of this debate in general. 21.4% are firm in their stance that it’s the farmer. 13.8% just wish it had anything to do with Ymir and nothing to do with the other options. 

I’m tired of this whole damn debate... but it's the farmer

LEVI SEEMED MORE VISIBLY IRRITATED ABOUT HOW TALL THE 104TH HAVE GOTTEN IN THE ANIME. THOUGHTS? 192 responses

MAPPA animated this scene with their own take and made Levi more irritable in the anime adaptation than he appeared to be in the manga. Generally, half of respondents felt that both ways were effective and funny. 25.5% seem to enjoy MAPPA’s rendition of it more, while 18.2% prefer the original manga portrayal of Levi’s grievances.

THE TRAIN SCENE WHERE EREN CONFESSES TO HIS FRIENDS IS TREASURED BY MUCH OF THE FANDOM. DID MAPPA DO IT JUSTICE? 193 responses

For fans of the 104th in particular, this scene has felt like it’s taken 84 years to finally be animated. And very few were disappointed, with 56.5% stating that the scene was cute and they are content with it, and another 36.8% showing a little more enthusiasm, feeling that it was more beautifully done than they ever could have imagined. A handful felt it could have been better, but was still good, or just didn’t care. No one agreed that the scene was ruined.

DARK!CONNIE RETURNS! WHO DID HIM BETTER? 190 responses

Another highly anticipated moment… the return of Dark!Connie! MAPPA didn’t quite hit the mark on this one, with Connie’s aura in the manga still being much more preferable to manga readers than the way MAPPA portrayed him in the anime.

WHEN CHAPTER 108 WAS PUBLISHED, READERS WERE ASKED IF EREN STILL PRIORITIZED HIS FRIENDS. AT THAT TIME, THE MAJORITY BELIEVED THAT HE DID, ALTHOUGH THE LARGER HALF OF THAT MAJORITY FELT IT WAS TO A LESSER DEGREE THAN BEFORE THE TIMESKIP. WE’D LIKE TO ASK AGAIN, DO YOU THINK THAT EREN ULTIMATELY TOOK THIS PATH OF DESTRUCTION BECAUSE HE PRIORITIZES HIS FRIENDS? 190 responses

Overall, the majority of the fanbase believe that Eren’s actions are generally in the interest of his friends and their lifespan, though to varying degrees (38.4% feel he prioritizes them wholly above all else, while 34.7% feel that he prioritizes them, but to a lesser degree than he used to). 21.1% still think that Eren’s contradictory actions make it hard to come to a solid conclusion on this front. A handful feel that Eren has abandoned them completely and only cares about himself and his own freedom at this point. 

I want to believe that hes prioritizing his friends, but too many of his actions contradict that, like forcing them into the battle in liberio and sending titans after the alliance 

Eren wasn't able to save his mother and this fact still torments him. I think that his friends matter to him a lot, but there is something darker in him what causes all the mess he is doing. 

He’s selfish and doing whatever he wants.

DO YOU THINK IT’S POSSIBLE THAT EREN PUSHED HIS FRIENDS TO THE FRONT LINES BECAUSE HE ALREADY SAW IN HIS FUTURE MEMORIES THAT THEY WOULD STOP HIM, THUS KNOWING THEY WOULD NOT DIE? 188 responses

When chapter 108 was published, we hadn’t yet learned that Eren saw memories of the future and so we couldn’t speculate on such a thing. Now that we can, we thought we would ask. 42.6% believe that regardless of whether Eren saw his friends in those memories or not, Mikasa is correct in her belief that Eren simply trusted them to survive. 33% feel that he already knew that they would survive, which is the only reason why he dragged them to Liberio in the first place. 18.6% don’t want to say either way, and a small percentage believe Eren had no way of knowing about the fate of his friends. 

He said "I HOPE they will have happy long lives". It means he didn't see much.

WILL WE SEE THE WARRIORS + MAGATH AND COLT NEXT EPISODE? 187 responses

With things shuffled around, we still have yet to see the Warriors recuperating and planning their next move. Half of the fandom feel that MAPPA was waiting to put the focus back on Gabi and Falco before giving us this moment. 32.1% aren’t sure if we will get it in episode 70 or not. 14.4% think it’s something that will come later, and a tiny fraction think it will be cut entirely.

Need my warriors back

WHICH SCENE FROM THE PREVIEW ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? 193 responses

The largest percentage (48.2%) went to the scene with Hange confronting Floch and the Yeagerists, though it is edged out by both of Gabi and Falco’s preview scenes combined (42% for the visit to the Blouse’s, and 9.8% for their scuffle at the river). 

Can't care less about to gabi and falco, it's the final season cut the filler please.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

I miss Sasha

No thoughts, anxiety only. 

Hope to see the cut scenes in the next episode

Maybe I'm the only one, but I'm not so hyped for this season anymore. Sure, I'll still watch all the episodes no matter what, and I don't think Mappa is doing a bad job. But it's just a good adaptation. For the anime-onlys, I'm sure it's great because they're discovering the story we already know, but for me, this season doesn't add much to the manga. I probably had too high expectations for this season... (I'm also watching/reading Jujustsu Kaisen from Mappa and I don't have that feeling at all, so I'm pretty conflicted)

The episode was fine but I had a feeling that it was going a little too fast. However, I'm not complaining because I overally liked it. I could finally see adult Historia. She looks different than her manga counterpart. In the manga she was more mysterious and mature, while in the anime she still has cute baby face. I think that the moment between her and Mikasa was sweet. I feel kinda tired of the whole "who is the father" theories. I think that people waste their energy on fights and debates. If I wasn't part of the fandom, I wouldn't even think of Eren having a child with Historia. They never had romantic relationship and their last conversation was far away from being loving. Eren is an amotional mess. He has never mentioned the child in his POV, he says that his friends and Paradis are the most important, so I will be surprised if all of sudden he turns to be a father.

The lightning around eren when angry at hange was amazing addition (I think it's new) and historias situation feels more real in the anime. (ps: hail ponytail mikasa is bea)

Did a great job imo, but I don't think it's possible to make it anywhere near 122 at this point

Scenes were great as usual. The pacing was a little bit jarring though. I don't know how anime-onlys will take it since we do have different perspectives given our forehand knowledge of the events.

Where's shirtless Reiner??

Good episode, can’t wait for Gabi and Falco’s realization next episode 

I wish everything from the manga could fit into the episode or that the episodes were longer.

There's really no where else I could've put this so I'll just put it here......lol. I feel like it's not as obvious in the anime how much longer Jean's hair has gotten sometimes (specifically during the railroad scene here) and I wish that wasn't the case.

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 180 responses

Thank you to everyone who participated! 

[cakelanguage]

Merry Christmas @okay-sky! I’m your secret Santa for the @fmasecretsanta2020 #fmasecretsanta

I had an absolute blast writing this for you and I hope you like this RoyEd piece as much as I enjoyed writing it. Have a happy holidays and I wish you the best.

You can also read this on AO3

--

The snow was a foot deep and maneuvering through it was a pain in the ass, but Roy was determined to make it to the post office in North City. Normally, Roy rarely makes the trip unless he's on the last dredges of his food supply but the potential for one of Ed's letters to be there had him pushing onward. 

For the short amount of time he'd gotten to spend in Central, he'd spent a large amount of it enjoying the company of the Elric brothers, specifically Ed. It was like an old wound had finally stopped aching when he got to see the man. And he was now. A man, that is. A maturity he never thought he'd see from the older Elric permeated his actions. While he still had a temper he didn't bare his teeth at the smallest of teases. He seemed wiser now and Roy wondered what he'd experienced in this other world. 

His interest and desire to spend more time with Ed wasn't one-sided either. The man--amidst Roy’s own scramble to steal his attention from Miss Rockbell and Alphonse-- found him at all hours of the day to discuss anything. From alchemic theories to the property damage done while he was away, the two never seemed to run out of things to talk about.

When he'd been forced to return up North, Ed had been the one to suggest keeping up a correspondence through letters. Roy didn't mention that he’d have to essentially hike to the post office and instead happily agreed. Ed promised to write often and Roy said he'd do the same. 

And he intended to. 

Which brought him back to his every other day trek.

He didn't know when he'd receive his first letter so he just kept coming back. For the first time, Roy was thankful for the cane that the doctor suggested he get for strenuous exercise in case the scar tissue flared up. He'd been adamant about not using it for the longest time, but out here -- where he wasn't surrounded by people who unintentionally put him on a pillar-- using the cane didn't matter.

His breath puffed in the frosty air as he took a moment to rest his legs. He could already see the city so he'd only have around another 30-minute walk if he continued at the pace he was going. 

North City was as lively as it could be for one with near-constant snowfall. While the population consisted mostly of military personnel there were still plenty of families and small businesses dotted amongst the abundance of government buildings.

These little businesses felt like they’d been plucked out of a different location, the warm glow of the fluorescents glimmering through the large windows. Roy's favorite was a little bookstore that specializes in customer requests. They'd take a poll from an assortment of people to find out what they wanted and go from there.

Roy indulged in much of the literature they had to offer and the sweet family-run shop told him he was welcome to make any requests he wanted.

Ed would've salivated at the thought.

On the outskirts of the inner city lies the post office. It was never terribly busy which was a blessing so Roy had no trouble siddling up to the counter. 

"Well I'll be," the scruffy man at the counter whistled, "you're back again already."

Roy gave him a tired smile. "Glettner, I just don't want to miss the letter I'm supposed to be getting."

"I guess, but you don't live in the city so you gotta walk here." He shuddered. "Couldn't pay me to make that hike more than once a year and I've lived here for over a decade." 

"I want to be punctual."

Glettner rolled his eyes, but those eyes only held mirth in them. "Well Mr. Punctual, you're in luck, a letter for you arrived yesterday evening."

Roy wasn't sure what his reaction was but it garnered him a chuckle all the same. 

"Ah-ha!" Glettner cried victoriously and walked back over with the letter. "This person must really like you if they're willing to use four stamps and Express delivery." He shook his head. "Express is always so expensive.”

The letter in his hand was hefty with Ed’s tell-tale god awful handwriting on the front. He brought the letter close to his chest with a content hum. 

“Ugh,” Glettner whined, “Go read your letter somewhere else if you’re gonna be looking like that when you only read the cover.”

Roy sent him a flat look. “I’ll see you, Glettner,” Roy called over his shoulder, tucking the letter safely into his coat. “Stay warm.”

“Speak for yourself! Try not to get yourself killed walking to the post office you flame-brained moron.”

Glettner always did say the nicest things. 

Back in the relative safety of his cabin, Roy was able to settle down and open the letter. Carefully, he pulled the small bundle of papers jammed inside, out onto the table. Offhandedly he stoked the fire a little more with a snap of his fingers. 

Admittedly, he’d missed the ease that using his alchemy allowed him with certain tasks. 

Colonel Bastard,

Roy snorted and shook his head. He’d already told Ed he wasn’t a colonel anymore, but apparently, the fact hadn’t stuck in the shrimp’s mind. He wondered if Ed still had his infamous temper tantrums about his height. 

Something to find out later.

The other man seemed to have grown up a great deal in the past two years, but Roy doubted Ed would’ve been able to calm himself down when it came to his height and the lack thereof.

I hope this gets to you fast, and that you haven’t frozen solid up there. Havoc told me about your cabin and I’ll be honest: sounds shitty. But they did say you had a fireplace so maybe it isn’t too bad as long as you don’t move from in front of the fire. Though now that I know what your job entails I can honestly say that you might be fucked. 

Seriously, who wants to stand out in all that snow to watch for potential attacks from Drachma? That’s what Briggs is for. So get your ass back here before your ass freezes to a chair or something. 

He couldn’t stop the laugh that burst from him. The letter was just wholly Ed and it almost felt like the other man was here in person. 

Al wants me to tell you he says hi, so that’s from him. He’s doing okay, he’s kinda got everything figured out now. I mean he obviously did before, he was doing fine while I was gone. He’s made a name for himself even if he did kinda steal my look. 

He doesn’t need me anymore. 

The ink is smudged and blurred in spots and Roy’s heart clenched in his chest when he realized that those were probably tears. 

I expected it and I’m glad he was able to keep moving forward with everyone’s help. I don’t know. I guess I didn’t realize how that’d make me feel when you were here. You’re kinda distracting even when Al’s around.

No higher praise than being able to pull Ed’s attention away from his little brother. 

Resembool is the same, which is weird. Germany seemed to change every day. There were always new people coming through or some kind of showcase going on. Did I tell you about the rocket we were building? It’s hard to remember that I’m no longer in a world governed by the laws of “modern science” instead of Alchemy.

I wish you were here. I miss your stupid, smug face. 

Oh did he ache for Ed to be able to insult him in person. 

It’s your turn to write a letter.

-Edward Elric

Beside his name, Ed had drawn what he assumed was a self-portrait of him sticking his tongue out in a cartoonish style. Charming.

Roy set the letter on the table and rubbed at his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. Somehow, the letter only made him miss Ed more. He wanted to ease Ed’s worries and reassure him that he was needed. 

Well, he had a letter to write.

--

Fullmetal,

I thought telling you four times was enough, but maybe your ears were too tiny to hear me correctly. I’m not a colonel anymore so the name isn’t correct. Haven’t we known each other long enough to be a little less informal?

You’re right, it’s freezing up here, and staying warm is near impossible without the fire. I wear two layers of wool socks and I’m still wary that I’m going to get frostbite on one of my watches. 

Briggs is in charge of guarding our border. I’m just in charge of keeping watch on the trading routes that weave along the mountain valley for any sign of trouble. 

Al may not need you in the same capacity that he did, but I guarantee he’s happier than he’s been in the last two years now that you’re here. From what I’ve heard from both Hawkeye and Miss Rockbell, he always seemed to be looking over his shoulder for you when he’d accomplish anything. 

You are absolutely needed, and not just by Al. Never forget that Edward. 

Small towns don’t change often so I’m not surprised it seems the same. People grow older, but small towns keep to themselves for the most part. Every once in a while fresh meat joins the community and they’ll be a stir and things might change a little, but generally go back to normal quickly. 

City life is vivacious and ever-changing. A bigger place and more people means more changes. My aunt runs a bar and I remember how often the city would change around us. 

If by rocket you mean the one you released into that crowd of people, then yes I remember you telling me about it. But feel free to tell me again, you have a knack for storytelling that I didn’t think you’d have. 

I wish you were here too. I miss your impish face. 

-Roy Mustang

--

A week later, Roy received his second letter. 

Glettner gave him a wry grin and presented it to him with a flourish. “Your sweetheart replied,” he tittered, “should ask for a lock of hair in your next letter or a care package.” He winked at Roy. “Maybe something for those long, lonely nights.”

“Get your mind out of the gutter,” Roy grouched, “it’s not from a lover.”

Glettner sighed dramatically. “Well, certainly not with that attitude! You’re clearly pining, can’t you see it?”

He raised his only visible eyebrow at the man. “Really?”

The other man waved him off. “Nevermind, just get out of here. I’ll see you in a day or so.”

“Take care, Glettner.”

“Yeah, yeah, go read your damn letter.”

--

Bastard,

FUCK YOU, I GREW. 

Not that much Ed, Roy thought with a chuckle. 

I hope that’s a better name for you. And I’m not Fullmetal anymore, not really. Sure plenty of people are going to keep calling me that, but I’m not part of the military right now. Still gotta prove I’m not dead and shit. 

Do you know how hard it is to try to reinstate documents after they’ve listed you as dead? I was literally two seconds away from straight-up murdering a lawyer who was at city hall because he kept saying I needed more identification. Which is bullshit because I’m DEAD to the government. 

This would’ve been really handy when Al and I were running from the military, though. But not now! Luckily, it is being sorted out and I shouldn’t have to wait much longer before I have all my documentation in order.

That was good. Ed had just started the whole process when he left to return to his post and it’d given him a headache just thinking about it. 

So you lived with your aunt? Did you grow up in Central?

As much as I’ve traveled, I’m a hick at heart. I still enjoy the peace and quiet of the countryside more than the noise and life of the city. I can live in either though. 

A corner of his mouth lifts. Ed preferred anywhere he could read and learn without interruptions. That hadn’t changed.

Are you lonely up there by yourself? I feel like you’re probably spending way too much time criticizing all your past actions and moping. Fuck that. Tell me about something you want to do when you come back to Central. What’s on Roy “Smug Bastard” Mustang’s agenda?

-Ed

Oh, and thanks for saying that. I think I needed to hear that from someone. I’m glad it was you.

--

Ed,

I guess if you can so kindly call me something else, I can just use your name. And as much as I appreciate your affectionate nickname for me, you can just call me Mustang or even just Roy, it wouldn’t bother me at all. But if you insist on a nickname I suppose I can give you one too, shorty.

I haven’t had to deal with retracting a declaration of the deceased before so I honestly don’t have any advice for you. I’d suggest going through all the hoops that they line up for you to jump through even if a shortcut looks promising. Other people were claiming to be you for fame or what-have-you so they aren’t intentionally trying to be difficult. 

Why am I not surprised you actually thought about how useful the situation would’ve been back then… Maybe you’re getting predictable. 

I did grow up with my aunt as my legal guardian. Both of my parents passed away when I was a young boy and she took me in. It was a rocky start. I was mourning my parents and terrified of my new living situation. But Chris Mustang always did her best to make sure I was comfortable and taken care of whether it was food or new clothes.

But she also put me to work. I obviously couldn’t work at the bar, but I bused tables and cleaned the place once we closed for the night. 

Her bar doubled as an information network with her girls -- my sisters-- acting as spies while going about their business. People talk a lot during sex and will let their guard down if they feel comfortable. I learned my networking strategies from them.

I don’t know if I can imagine you as the typical hick. It’s something about all that rage and attitude that makes me think more of small town punks. But there is something nice about the quiet of the countryside.

It’s not I’m not I suppose I am a bit lonely out here. I don’t really have much communication to speak of besides your letters. They’re the highlight of my days. The only other person I normally talk to right now is the man who runs the post office. I feel like I’m disconnected from people nowadays. Whether that’s because I was part of a coupe that unsettled them or my demeanor is just off-putting. Let me know what you think. 

When I get back to Central, the first thing I want to do is look for an apartment. Then I’m not sure. Maybe go back to pursuing the title of Fruher. After the whole Homunculus debacle, I stepped down in a rush to… run as far away from what had happened as I could. 

After that… would you like to go out sometime? Get something to drink, eat a good meal with good company?

You’re probably going to have to fight to spend time with me at first. The team kept reminding me that when I was there that they missed me. But I’ll make plenty of time for you.

-Roy

--

“Roy, you have a package,” Glettner commented the third time he came into the post office that week. “Did you take my advice and ask for a token from them?” He leaned over the counter with a lewd grin. “There’s no telling what’s in here.”

Roy huffed and held out his hand. “Box, Glettner,” Roy ordered. He thought Glettner was funny and the man reminded him of an older, grayer Havoc with all his teasing and good-natured ribbing. It made him miss his team, though.

Glettner deposited the box in his hands before holding out a box cutter, handle-first to Roy. “Can I convince you to open it here? I can even let you use the back room for some privacy if you want.”

Roy shook his head with a put-upon grin. “You seem more excited about this package than I am.”

He shrugged “I don’t think you realize how boring it can get here. Usually the most exciting thing I get in this place is the military personnel transferring sensitive documents.” He scrunched his nose. “I don’t know, guess the whole thing makes my romantic heart sing.”

“You trying to get me to feel sorry for you so I’ll open the package here?”

“That depends, is it working?”

He chuckled softly, shaking his head. “Fine, take me to your backroom.”

Glettner threw a fist in the air and gestured to a door on the right. “Follow me, lover-boy.”

He grumbled but followed after the perky man. They weaved through the stacks of boxes and came across a desk. Glettner shoved a few papers to the side so Roy had a spot to put his package on. 

Roy set his box down and carefully ran the knife along the taped edges. He shifted through the newspaper that’d been carefully positioned around the gift. 

And what a gift it was. 

Nestled inside the box was a phone that was almost the exact one that’d sat on his old desk. He gently pulled it out of its protective paper. Now that he could see it fully he noted the wear on some of the parts. The rotary dial was a polished bronze and looked to be the newest piece on the phone. The body of the phone consisted of a few welded pieces of metal but the job was near seamless so unless Ed knew someone who could weld, he’d probably done it himself with alchemy.

He thumbed at the handset and couldn’t stop the grin that spread across his face. It felt like the same metal as Ed’s new arm was made of and he knew Ed had made that choice on purpose. 

“They sent you a phone?” Glettner asked, interrupting Roy’s casual admiration of his gift. 

“I’m pretty sure it’s so we can call each other in case we don’t want to wait for the mail system to deliver our messages,” Roy explained. 

The other man turned his attention to him sharply. “So I won’t see you anymore?”

Roy shook his head. “No, you’ll still have to see me,” he nodded his head at the phone, “Even with a phone I won’t have a guaranteed connection with where I am, but it gives us the option if we…” He paused, his smile going from soft to joyful, “to hear each other’s voice.”

“Aw fuck,” Glettner sniffled, “you’ve got that mushy look on your face.”

Roy’s face closed off. “Better?”

The postman shook his head. “I think whatever you two are, it makes you better.” He rubbed at his nose and shrugged. “Take that as you will.”

--

Setting up the phone was relatively easy after he finagled a makeshift antenna to the roof of the cabin. He’d picked up a few pieces of scrap steel and transported his load back to his cabin. With a quick transmutation, he’d constructed an antenna that would ideally not break if the storms got bad. 

Ed had suggested he use steel in his letter and if he trusted anyone when it came to metal knowledge it’d be the Fullmetal Alchemist, Edward Elric.

He glanced over at the letter he’d set on the table and reread what Ed had written.

… Winry and Al pointed out to me that I could be calling you if I didn’t want to wait to get a letter. But when I asked Riza how to call you she told me you didn’t have one.

What kind of bullshit is that? I figure everyone has a phone but then you get relocated and haven’t bothered to get a phone in the two years you’ve been gone?

There's a large inkblot on the dot of his question mark as if Ed had paused to gather his thoughts but forgotten to pick up his pen.

 Sounds like you were in a bad place. 

Ed had always had a special gift of understanding why Roy did what he did. Even more so now that he'd matured more and had gone through a similar mindstate.

I get that. I’ve been there. But I’m taking away some of this forced isolation you’ve coveted for yourself. 

I’m not telling you that you have to start talking to people now that you have a phone, but try. You may have lost an eye, but you aren’t blind. And you have tons of people who care about you and I know you can see that so don’t keep shutting them out.

Like that. 

Everyone else had given him ample space to adjust to his vision change and his disillusionment of the government he'd put so much time and effort into. But that space became hard to contain and soon he'd pushed almost everyone behind the protective wall he'd crafted for himself. 

He needed someone to tell him that what he was doing couldn't-- nor should it-- continue. 

I’ve written everyone’s number down on the back of this letter just in case you forgot, old man. I hijacked the Rockbell’s landline so I can have a phone in my room. Feel free to call whenever after seven. 

I don't care if it's ass o'clock in the morning, call me if you need me or wanna talk or whatever. 

Talk to you soon, hopefully.

-Ed

He didn't use the phone for a good three hours until the hands on the clock were just shy of eleven. He tried two fingers of scotch to help him sleep, but it left a smoky aftertaste in his mouth that brought up too many memories of being a walking crematorium. 

He finished spinning the dial and waited for the call to be picked up or ignored. It wasn’t that he thought Ed was lying about being able to call whenever, but Ed couldn’t guarantee he’d be by the phone at all times.

There was a click and then a familiar voice echoing through the receiver. “Rockbell Automail, the store hours are from 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. but if this is an emergency we’ll see what we can do,” Ed recited before continuing with a knowing tone, “Unless this is a certain soldier out in the middle of nowhere up North who received his package and decided to give me a call.”

Roy wasn’t one you would call a religious man, but he considered praying for patience. “Hello, Edward,” he conceded. 

“Fuck… holy fuck Roy,” Ed said with the sort of casual blasphemy only he would dare. There was a shuffling on the other end of the line. “You actually called.”

“Time hasn’t made you any less explicit,” Roy teased. He imagined a metal middle finger jerked at him in return. 

“It’s been what? A month?” Ed snorted, “If my cursing hasn’t changed since I was a kid then a month has no chance of changing it.”

He grinned and propped his head up with his hand. “You’re right about that.” He looked around the room for something to focus on, landing on Ed’s letter. “How are you?” The question came out softer than he’d like, but it’s what he meant.

Ed made a noncommittal noise. “It’s weird. The old lady and Winry keep treating me like I’m still a little kid. Maybe it’s because they didn’t get to see me grow up over the last two years. But they’re doing their best to adjust.”

Roy hummed in understanding. “It’s not dissimilar to a person coming back from deployment. They know the person who left, not necessarily the person who comes back.”

“Yeah, I guess… It’s still taking some getting used to. How come you didn’t treat me like I was the teen you last saw?”

“You’re a brat, but it was easy to see you’d changed.” That golden hair pulled back into a ponytail instead of his signature braid. The broad shoulders that filled out his brown trenchcoat and the bookish outfit underneath. He might mourn the loss of the man’s leather pants, but he looked every inch of the man he’d become. His thoughts made him brave. “You’ve become quite the looker, Ed.”

A sputter from the other line had Roy chuckling into his shoulder. It’s enchanting to hear Ed’s embarrassment over the phone and a longing yawned in his chest to see the ruby flush against the man’s cheeks. To see the way he’d turn incredulous eyes to gawk at Roy like he’d spoken gibberish. To see Ed fight the smile that’d reveal his teeth in joy instead of a threat.

He just wanted Ed. Here, with him. Or him with Ed. Together. 

Glettner was more aware of Roy’s feelings than he was.

“-up! I hope you’re not mocking me you ass,” Ed grumbleing finally making it through Roy’s thoughts. 

“I’m not mocking you, you really are beautiful.”

The line remained silent for a stretch and Roy wondered briefly if he’d pushed Ed a little too much. That he’d made the man uncomfortable with his sudden forwardness. 

“You look pretty good yourself,” Ed mumbled.

His heart skipped a beat in his chest and his cheeks grew warm. “Not much to look at compared to you,” Roy managed to say.

“Yeah, okay, sure,” the eye roll unmistakably tacked onto the statement. “I’m guessing you couldn’t sleep.”

“Couldn’t I have called you because I wanted to hear your voice?”

Ed actually laughed at that. “You could and I’m flattered, bastard, but I can hear the exhaustion in your voice.”

“Alright, yes I can’t sleep.” 

“What do you want me to do about that?”

What indeed. He already felt better after hearing Ed’s voice so perhaps more of that? “Tell me about your day.”

“As long as you're willing to pay anything the Rockbell’s might be charged for the long-distance call, I’ll talk all night.”

“Just until I fall asleep should do the trick.”

“Well get comfy and I’ll tell you about my return to city hall.”

Roy settled as comfortably as he could on his couch and closed his eyes, letting himself drift upon the lilts and steadiness of Ed’s voice. 

--

As they reach the two-month mark of their separation, Roy was getting antsy. His transfer back to Central seemed to be in a stalemate. Too much silence from both sides for Roy’s patience to tolerate. He already sent another letter to Ed to inform him that he still didn’t have a timeframe for his return. 

With no set date for his relocation, he got wrapped up in his thoughts. The snow bit angrily at his cheeks and he’d started moving his post office trips to every three days because he couldn’t get his body to plow through the snow. The cabin’s walls were thin and the flames fanned uselessly in the fireplace no matter how close Roy put himself to the heat source. 

Loneliness he’d been able to ignore for years was near intolerable now. He’d talked to his team, reconnected with Riza, or at least started mending the relationship that’d been damaged in the wake of Bradley’s defeat and the loss of his eye.

But ever since his realization during the phone call with Ed, nothing seemed to fill the Ed-sized space in his heart. He pondered on the feelings he’d developed for Ed, questioned why he loves him but only came up with Ed himself as the reason. 

He took a sip of his tea when he heard a knock on his door. 

The suddenness of the noise was enough to startle him into almost dropping his mug and he turned a wary eye to his door. He didn’t get visitors, not out here. The only time anyone had visited him it’d been about the strange phenomenon that ultimately led to Ed returning home to them. 

He doubted something that severe would pop-up again in such a short span of time, but stranger things had happened so he couldn’t rule out the possibility. 

Slipping on his gloves, he cautiously approached the door. He waited until he heard another knock before he openned the door, his fingers poised to snap.

And there’s Ed.

Snow and ice clung to his clothes and he noted that Ed’s trench coat seemed to now be lined with a fur of some kind. He took in Ed’s wind-chafed skin and red nose, saw the ice crystals that had attempted to attach themselves to his lashes. 

This couldn’t be real. He must’ve fallen asleep and he’s dreaming. He had to be. 

Except Ed was waving his hand obnoxiously in his face, grinning at him with the pride of a show dog. “You still in there or did I break you?” Ed asked.

He gaped uselessly at the figure that stood in front of him. “Ed?” He rasped, still not believing his eyes. 

“The one and only.” He tilted his head to the side, his smile going lazy. “Are you gonna make me stay out here much longer? Because I’m pretty sure my toes have fucking frozen off and I only have five. I really can’t lose them.”

Roy snapped his jaw shut with a click and stepped back to let Ed in. “Yeah, of course, come in.”

Ed blustered in with all the hesitation of a tornado, stripping out of his dripping coat and unwinding the scarf from around his neck, hanging both over his kitchen table. 

“Thank fuck you have a fireplace,” Ed grunted, holding both of his hands out towards the heat source. “If Winry and Granny hadn’t hooked me up with this new automail I would’ve really gotten frostbite.”

Roy nodded absent-mindedly, still stuck on the reality that Ed was here in his cabin. “How-How did you get here?”

Ed’s forehead furrowed. “Well after I took a train up here I asked around if anyone knew where I’d find a soldier with an eyepatch, the postman pointed me in the right direction.” He shrugged. “Then I walked here.”

He'd have to thank Glettner the next time he saw him. Or avoid him at all cost because the man was never going to let him live this down. He probably felt like he was some sort of matchmaker, guaranteeing Ed made it to him.

“Through all the snow?”

The man squinted at him. “Yes?” It came out as a question more than an answer. “Are you okay? You’re really stuck on this whole ‘Ed’s here with me’ thing.” 

And what’s he supposed to say to that? That he’s still convinced that this could only be a dream because this sort of thing doesn’t happen to him. “I just never expected you to come here.”

He gets a bemused expression from Ed for that. “Why not? I got your letter.” He huffed and lounged on his couch. “So they can’t even give you a date?”

He shook his head. “Not now, maybe in a week or two, I’ll get an answer from them.” Roy shuffled awkwardly for a moment trying to decide what to say. “Do you want some tea?”

Ed snorted, his nose crinkling. “I could go for some tea, but I’m fine with something stronger if you've got it.”

He cocked his head to the side and crossed his arms. “Don’t you mean if I’m feeling generous?”

“Nope,” Ed chimed.

“Let’s start with tea,” Roy snagged the only other mug he owned and poured Ed a cup, “get you warm first. After that?” He handed the mug to Ed who took it gratefully. “We’ll see about alcohol.”

Humming in agreement Ed took an aborted sip, cursing as the liquid scorched his tongue. “Fuck, dammit you could’ve warned me it was this hot,” Ed grumbled, glaring at his mug. 

“I didn’t know you were expecting cold tea.”

“Bastard.”

“Brat.”

The jibes were gentle despite themselves and Roy felt the familiar contentment in his being that he’d been getting when he was with Ed in any capacity. Whether it’s a phone call or in-person or even in a letter. Ed remained a stained glass masterpiece in his heart.

They sat in campanionable silence. The flickering of the fireplace casted a red glow around the room except for Ed. Ed’s always an exception. Instead of the red overlay across Ed, he glowed gold. 

His skin -- tanned and scarred-- reminded Roy of wedding rings and sun-warmed bronze. His eyes of finely crafted jewelry and the lace-gold details in famous paintings from the west. And his hair. The finest silk, bundled into a ponytail that trailed to at least the bottom of his shoulder blades.

He desperately wanted to say something to hear more of Ed’s voice. A voice that had haunted his mind for the past two years. A desperation to take, take, take until he had all of Ed. 

“I didn’t get to say this before,” Ed said, finally breaking their silence. “But I’m a fan of the eyepatch.”

From anyone else, he would’ve ignored the comment, but Roy knew that Ed was being serious right now. “It was a necessity after Bradley got it,” Roy said, setting his cup down and bringing a hand to the patch. “It isn’t a pretty sight, even Hawkeye had trouble looking at it.”

“I doubt that,” Ed took another sip from his drink, “if anything she probably still feels guilty that you lost it at all.”

He made a noncommittal noise. “No one should feel guilty about this, I got it taking Bradley down. And I survived.”

“You did.” Ed grinned at him. “And I think the patch makes you look rugged.”

Roy snorted and quirked a brow at him. “Sure that’s not just from living out here for the past two years?”

Ed’s eyes rolled so hard that Roy’s surprised they didn’t just pop out of his skull. “You haven’t grown any stupid facial hair yet so I’d say it’s the patch.”

“You don’t think I’d look good with facial hair?”

The tips of Ed’s ears flushed. “I didn’t say that,” he mumbled, “I am saying you’d look god awful with a moustache.” 

There is a niggling temptation to grow one just to get on Ed's nerves but he pushed that thought aside. He heaved a dramatic sigh. "I suppose I'll refrain for now." 

Ed laughed and it reverberated through him with the warmth of an embrace. He wanted to bottle the noise up and tuck it into the spaces between his ribs. Roy couldn't remember the last time he felt this content.

The other man was still looking at him when he focused back on their conversation. "Can I see it?"

Roy’s face closed off and he shifted awkwardly on the couch. “You… you want to see it?” He clarified because surely he'd heard wrong.

Ed shrugged and scooted a little closer. “Why wouldn’t I?”

He asked like it should be obvious to Roy, but doesn’t comment on it. Roy couldn't bring himself to deny Ed something that Roy was readily willing to give. Wanted to give. And maybe there's a small part of him that wanted to show someone. To not have someone shy away from the topic. To look at all of him now and not who he was before. 

Maybe he didn't just leave Central because he wanted to still help his country through a corrupt system.

Maybe he was tired of hiding.

He reached his hand up towards the strings that held his eyepatch in place but hesitates. "Are you sure you want to see it?" He wondered if he would want to see it if this was someone else. He knew for sure that he’d want to see Ed. Roy swore to himself that he’d never hesitate to look at Ed’s scars, not a single one of them would be skipped by his eyes.

Ed's eyes softened and he moved himself closer to Roy. They were barely a foot away from the other, their knees knocking together. The solid press of Ed’s automail knee against his own was surprisingly grounding. He wonderd if anyone else felt this way about Ed’s prosthetic limbs.

Ed didn't hesitate when he cupped Roy's face with his metal hand. He expected the harsh metal to be icy to the touch – unlike his leg that was still covered by the thick material of Ed’s pants – but it was heat-licked by the fire. Roy couldn't help but lean into the touch with a pleased sigh.

Mirth twinkled in Ed's eyes like honeyed gold. He ran his thumb along the bottom edge of his eyepatch. "I'm sure."

I want to see you. That’s what Roy heard inbetween Ed’s words. It didn't need to be said. Ed had already proven his surety with his touch, but it comforted Roy to hear it all the same. 

The satin ties of his eyepatch were easy enough to undo after he loosened the knot and soon the patch was fluttering down into his lap. He kept the eye closed for now, letting Ed see the mess of scars from the enucleation and trauma from Bradley’s blade. He watched Ed’s face for any reaction through his good eye, watching as he took in his face as a whole.

The first brush of Ed’s metal hand on the scars had him letting out a shuddering breath. His heart was pounding erratically in his chest and he couldn’t stop his sudden panic. It’s just Ed. Edward was the only one here with him. It’s just them. Together. Here. Now and not then. This steel was warm and nothing like the biting edge of a blade.

A second hand joined the first, this one with calluses and worn nails that worked their way through his hair. Instantly, he found himself relaxing under the ministrations of Ed’s talented fingers. Losing time or just forgetting everything that wassn’t Edward Elric.

“Come on, lemme see those eyes of yours, Colonel Bastard,” Ed urged, his thumb teasing along Roy’s cheekbone.

Despite himself, Roy found himself smiling. “Not a colonel anymore, Fullmetal,” he reminded Ed, “and I only have one eye.”

“Not Fullmetal anymore, Roy.”

He could hear his name on Ed’s lips for the rest of his life and Roy would never stop feeling his heart skip a beat. “Ed.”

Slowly, he opened both of his eyes and went back to watching Ed’s face. The breath hitched in Ed’s lungs for only a second before it settled back to normal. Roy couldn’t blame him. The clear conformer that prevented his eyelid from collapsing into the socket gave a clear view of the hollow interior. He hadn’t bothered getting a prosthetic eye, not when he’d been out here by himself for so long. His doctors still weren’t sure when he would even be able to wear one given the damage done to his eyelid and ocular cavity.

Instead of the multitude of reactions that Roy had prepared himself for, Ed gave him a gentle smile and cupped his face with both hands. “There you are.”

“How do I look?” Roy asked as though he couldn’t see the way Ed looks at him.

Maybe he couldn’t, because there’s a touch of uncertainty to Roy’s question that he couldn’t write off. Whether it’s over the way the scars mar his handsome face or over what Ed might think about his appearance, Roy couldn’t decide.

“Like you can take on the world,” Ed said without hesitation.

Stealing himself, Roy closed the distance between them and sealed their mouths together. Ed’s lips are chapped from his journey through the snow, but warm and solid against his own. He didn’t intensify the kiss, keeping it chaste since Ed hadn’t started to kiss him back. 

Reluctantly, he pulled away from Ed trying to catch the younger man’s eyes. Did he ruin this? “Ed?”

“Kiss me again,” Ed ordered but didn’t bother waiting for Roy to act, instead grabbing two handfuls of his shirt and smashing their lips together.

It’s messy, too much tongue and their teeth clack painfully against each other like Ed wanted to devour him, but he dived right in. He took control of the kiss, guiding Ed’s lips to slide against his own at a more sedate pace. The corners of his mouth turned up when Ed sighed against his mouth, a near-silent moan escaping him. 

Roy trailed a hand up Ed’s back until he reached the end of the man’s ponytail. He wrapped the silken strands around his fingers and tugged lightly. Ed splayed his hands against the plains of his chest, releasing his shirt from his grasp. 

When he found himself desperate for oxygen, he pulled away once more. Ed made a displeased groan but sat back enough to stare at Roy.

The affection and happiness that sparkled in Ed’s eyes was overwhelming and he couldn’t help but tell Ed exactly how he felt. “I think I love you,” Roy whispered.

Ed smiled back at him, his lips kiss-bruised and tempting. “Why do you think I’m here, Roy?” 

He didn’t have to say it because Ed always showed you how he felt. So when Ed tilted his head back, Roy capitulates to the silent request, sealing their mouths together again.

A flame captured by the glint of gold and steel.

[yibuo]

UMMM I would love to know what exactly happened with xnine too if you know??

i didn’t know how to answer this without hating on long danni but... that’s not possible when you’re talking about xnine

CORRECT ME IF I’M WRONG IN ANY WAY @ DIMPLES AND CFANS

tldr ceo addicted to producing survival shows realizes boy group is incapable of feeding her fat rabbit because of her OWN mismanagement and throws them away (literally? probably not, maybe, idk)

HOLY SHIT THIS BECAME RLY LONG IM BEGGING KEEP READING TO WORK LO LOL LOL

long danni= wjjw company ceo

wjjw=company that xnine, xz, r1se, etc are under

huo mala: fat company rabbit that WILL give u nightmares goodness gracious thinking about him sends chills down my spine

alright so long danni (ldn i will refer to her) & ee media along w/ tencent and sm made the survival show x-fire... the premise of xfire was that 16 contestants split into two different teams (white and red) and then at the end it would boil down to each team having 4 members and the winning team would debut as a group called xfire...but wait...the group’s name is xnine? so out of red team (peng chuyue, baishu, xiao zhan, xia zhiguang) and white team(wu jiacheng, gu jiacheng, zhao lei, and guo zifan) white team won...and they unofficially debuted as xfire..went abroad to train yadda yadda yadda and then a few months later, TELL ME WHY LONG DANNI DECIDES TO RELEASE POLLS TO LET FANS VOTE IN 5 MEMBERS INTO XFIRE TO CREATE XNINE! ldn PLEASE if u wanted to rig the show you should’ve decided in the beginning what was the point of making the teams and the fans fight against each other...

so yeah xz and crew weren’t actually supposed to debut according to show rules...i mean i’m glad they debuted obviously bc x9 is x9 but ee media and frickin ldn couldve handled this better...like every member except chen molerat is amazing and great but....WHY DIDNT MaNAGEMENT NOT BLATANTLY RIG THEM INTO THE GROUP

but also thank u ldn for also letting us get to know the 4 guys who were added n not chen molerat <3 but like DO UR JOB PROPERLY

anyway the polls were RIGGED obviously thanks ldn what did u expect out of making POLLS, and xiao zhan, peng chuyue, xia zhiguang, yan xujia, and chen z*** were added to the group to create xnine...talk about rigged when chen z*** the molerat lookin turdface misogynist was added... anyway at the time he wasnt known to be problematic but ya the whole rigging thing caused a whole rift esp when x9 debuted bc there were fanwars and death threats initially but xfire did well because it was one of the (if not only) survival shows at that time and x9 debuted w/ a good response etc

then they got moved to wjjw (still owned by ldn thanks ldn) and wjjw is known for hoarding artists and not promoting them (THEY HAVE LIKE 45 ARTISTS BUT WERE FORMED 3 YEARS AGO MAKE IT MAKE SENSE) and not being promoted properly was EXACTLY what happened to xnine. as idols what they needed was music promotions, variety shows, etc stuff to get them as people out there but this genius ldn decided to promote them through stupid zodiac dramas like super star academy (to promote xfire finalists) and oh my emperor (which was an xnine drama). now i haven’t watched OME, but SSA gave me enough brain rot and gunk for me to not watch OME. (the only person who could act was baishu), and the story was SO BAD. nevermind the acting, because the boys weren’t initially slated to be actors, but the story was horrible, girl without superpowers suddenly becomes white cult goddess at the end??? WHAT???????? why didn’t ldn just promote them normally !!!!!! are they an actor group or an idol group???? I LOVE XNINE, THEY ARE TALENTED ARTISTS !!!! and eventually some went into acting (xz, guo zifan, gu jiacheng) BUT WAS THAT THE TIME DLFNJNF and then they just kept getting sent into random dramas and movies as random side characters instead of being able to make music and promote????? i’m sorry i’ve been stuck on using dramas to promote x9 for a while because that’s such a SILLY IDEA *vigorously shakes head* 

ldn knows how to do survival shows but she doesn’t know how to promote her artists thanks ldn. xnine has so much talented, we know xiao zhan is a great singer, but other main vocalists like wu jiacheng, zhao lei, and peng chuyue are amazing as welll, here’s me plugging this video of zl and pcy performing their self-written song on produce camp because it’s the most beautiful thing ever

-oh yeah somewhere in here insert chen molerat getting outed as a pedo misogynist cheater by his gf who still has the audacity to have xnine in his weibo name because xnine starting to get popular gtfo rat lookin ass i WILL barf, when we say ot8 xnine we mean xnine w/o chen toadratass but sometimes ppl think it’s xnine minus xz which is untrue-

they also have talented rappers (gu jiacheng yan xujia) and dancers (xia zhiguang guo zifan) like xia zhiguang can end me with his spinning flying kick thing and i WILL let him 

so YEAH !! TALENT that went to waste because wjjw gave them weird random hiatuses and kept pushing them as actors??? seriously what is with this actor stuff...so that’s why they debuted in 2016 and have very little discography to their name because wjjw just gave up...trying to promote them GOD thank u so much ldn for ur incomptency <3333 xnine had members in diff stages of life (ranging from xz who was born in 91, to yan xujia born in 2001, they were all close tho soo cute) and wjjw really was like nope we’re not gonna try to promote yall’s dreams of becoming singers on the stage because they couldn’t add 34783473 pounds to fat huo mala’s weight

so ya a lot of people are like omg wjjw hates xiao zhan!!! ya no they hate all of xnine but now xz is bringing enough money to make huo mala even fatter so good for huo mala i guess /s

also rumors and any bad media? lol wjjw doesn’t care they do a shit job at handling bad things too WHAT A WELLROUNDED COMPANY

OH ALSO TALK ABOUT HOW THYE HAD 3 DAYS TO PREPARE FOR A CONCERT???????????? WHAT????????? wjjw u mfs

anyway to summarize my rants above wjjw did  a SHIT job of promoting xnine as idols when the boys worked so hard and wjjw kept tryna push them to acting bye (some of them can’t act and literally don’t WANT TO ACT HHHSFLNF), wjjw is also horrible at letting all of the xnine members shine when as i mentioned before, they’re ALL TALENTED!!!! and then they just gave up on xnine somewhere in 2017-2018... ok anyway so is xnine disbanded? no although some may say their last concert in dec 2018 was their last concert ever they’re not disbanded

xiao zhan , gu jiacheng, and guo zifan went into acting

wu jiachang is focusing on his music etc (he was actually the first member of xnine i came across when i watched the collaboration/cyzj in 2018...yes carats this is That wu jiacheng!!!) MAN CAN SING

peng chuyue, zhao lei, xia zhiguang, yan xujia all went on produce camp 2019 (aNOTHER SURVIVAL SHOW BC THEY WANTED TO BE ON THE MF STAGE BC THATS WHY THEYRE HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE WJJW) along w/ fellow labelmates zhou zhennan and zhai xiao wen ... and everyone but peng chuyue made it to the final 11 spots and got to debut in the group r1se...UNFORTUNATELY ALSO UNDER WJJW HELP SEND HELP

if they’re in r1se does that mean they quit xnine? no! they’re in both that’s just how survival shows work it’s kind of weird

peng chuyue recently released a song and it’s really good and you can’t not tell me that it’s gay here it is

anyway xnine hasn’t disbanded!! the X玖少年团 (xnine) in the non-r1se members’ weibo names say that loud n clear!!! and when the r1se members from xnine won produce camp 2019, they all made xnine signs SO XNINE IS ALIVE and they do keep in contact!!

why haven’t we seen blatant public interactions btwen xiao zhan and the xnine members? because some frickin annoying xz solo stans/xfx claim that the other members use xz for popularity (HELLO??????? IN WHAT WORLD DOES THAT MAKE SENSE HALF OF THEM R LITERALLY HIS KIDS BUT OK) 

anyway in conclusion wjjw doesn’t know how to promote any of their artists, thus screwing over xnine members and making them go on a group hiatus where they focus on acting/singing/r1se for r1se members but they are very much xnine as of now !!!

here’s some REALLY GOOD RESOURCES to follow xnine bc as an ifan it’s mf hard

-xnine slideshow

-xnine faq

-xnine eng sub channel by yuer

-all of that content i listed above was made/subbed by one person and she is the queen of uhh...xnine international fandom outreach (????) how do i word it but she’s been subbing and spreading xnine long before xiao zhan’s popularity skyrocketed so go follow her for updates and memes here

-xnine intl fanbase twt and tumblr

-and here’s this twt account with dumb pics of xnine because why not

also i’m pretty sure there’s a wip video explaining x9′s history being created (by yuer because queen) so when that’s posted i’ll rb this and post it here

also here’s this video dragging wjjw

[baseballlibertarian]

Los Angeles Debate

Before I begin, please let me ask a favor. And the request comes in the form of a demand, maybe even an order.

Take a moment to ponder and savor the majestic historical break-through this debate represents. Longer. Longer. Let it soak in. Just take a moment longer.

OK.

Now, ask yourself this question: when you first became politically aware did you ever imagine a presidential debate of this magnitude and importance involving a woman and an African-American man?

I was born in 1962 and can tell you I first became politically aware when Robert Kennedy and Martin Luther King Jr. were assassinated. I didn’t know what it all meant, but I knew it was serious and sad. Like everyone, I was afraid our country had been changed forever and for the worse. I can’t help tonight but think back to the vague sense of dread I had about politics then and reflect tonight so many years later on the true nature of persistence and possibility.

I’ve watched politics as a journalist, I have come to understand the power of symbols and how symbols often obscure agendas. But sometimes symbols shatter old notions, accepted truths, and calcified conventions.

Tonight’s debate — whether you are a liberal, a conservative, or an independent — stands as a landmark in a nation that justifiably commands the attention and fascination of the world.

With Sen. Hillary Clinton and Sen. Barack Obama as the two remaining Democratic candidates for the presidency, the world sees the embodiment of core American traits of freedom, tolerance, diversity, grit and, yes, audacity.

This is not an endorsement of either candidate. It’s an acknowledgment that their rise to dominance in the Democratic Party breaks the mold in ways few could have imagined as recently as two years ago. When America, the most imaginative nation on Earth, surprises itself we must catch our breath, marvel at ourselves and indulge in a small blush of pride.

I can tell you the reason I am rhapsodizing about this moment. Here in the press room outside the Kodak Theater in Los Angeles, many in press row are bored. On a typical debate scale, this encounter is not an edge-of-your-seat affair. The debate is certainly calmer and more substantive than the Myrtle Beach knife fight. That’s to be expected, because politicians are normatively cautious and any two politicians taking part in something THAT’S NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE are even more prone to proceed with care.

And so Clinton and Obama did.

And yet, the debate was not without its high points.

I won’t grade the debate or the performances because tonight the larger issue is the event itself and what it represents. History will record the tableau, not the transcript.

Clinton and Obama dissected each other’s health care plans carefully and fairly. Clinton knows, because she believes in it and the polls reflect it, that pushing hard for universal health care is the way to appeal bedrock Democratic values and voters. When she said anything less will be “picked apart” she not only issued a warning but rallied party foot-soldiers who don’t want to fight for a concept, but an absolute.

This is not to say that Obama lost the health care debate. The voters will decide which approach is better. Whn Obama argues the first priority is to lower costs, he raises an important but politically less-resonant point. His formula takes longer to explain and exposes him to criticism that his plan is built on a fragile foundation where an estimated 15 million adults would still lack health insurance coverage. Based on conversations I’ve had with voters, however, it seems that if Obama loses ground on substance he makes it up on style. Obama voters and those on the fence tend to believe that a larger political coalition is required before universal health care or something close to it can be achieved. They also tend to believe Obama can create that coalition and Clinton cannot.

On Iraq, it’s hard for The Bourbon Room to detect a tectonic shift tonight (hey, I was born in San Diego and can indulge in one earthquake metaphor without penalty). Most Democratic voters understand Clinton and Obama will end the Iraq war more rapidly than any Republican nominee, especially if the nominee is, as appears more and more likely, Arizona Sen. John McCain. Obama supporters were drawn to him first because he opposed the war from the start. When Clinton declined again to say her vote for the Iraq war authorization was a “mistake” she re-enforced why many Obama supporters are where they are. In Super Tuesday states where some voters may be tuning into the campaign for the first time, this could reintroduce the central weakness in Clinton’s “experience” argument. Clinton strategists, however, believe she’s already lost all the votes she’s going to lose on this issue.

On the economy, differences were substantive but not remotely combative. Obama could have used his stump speech lines about Clinton’s original stimulus plan failing to demand tax rebates or credits. Clinton could have said she was warning about a recession long before Obama and put together the first substantive stimulus plan of any major candidate. Both left that ammunition under the table.

On immigration, the most important point is that both were far more willing to talk freely about comprehensive solutions. The reason? The rise of McCain. On driver’s licenses, the differences were gently highlighted and both scored a key point — Obama that Clinton flip-flopped; Clinton that a week after the Philadelphia debate Obama couldn’t authoritatively state his position. More important was how they enthusiastically spoke of a comprehensive solution and how readily they condemned the “anti-amnesty” politics that killed immigration reform (and nearly McCain’s candidacy) earlier this year. The change in tone and temperament matches McCain’s own improbable comeback. Clinton and Obama have begun to conclude that the immigration monster either will die because will be the GOP nominee or that it will be relegated to angry third-party splinter movement (a plus for the Democrats either way).

On the running-mate issue, both turned it away easily and for good reason. At the end of this campaign Clinton and Obama will stand as enormous figures — not only in their party but in American political history. If Clinton prevails, she will seek a vice president with complementary skills, temperament and, most importantly, a keen understanding of the lesser role the vice president must play in her White House. The same is true of Obama.

Why?

Because if either is elected president, all of the old measurements will disappear. Every move Clinton or Obama makes will be historic. The focus on their presidencies will be, if possible, even more intense, personal and urgent. Under these circumstances, the centrality of the office will require a vice president eager to accept a secondary role in a new march of history. Any whiff of competition or hidden agenda will not only rankle the president, the president’s senior staff and cabinet, but the party hierarchy and the rank-and-file. It’s The Bourbon Room’s hunch that a large swath of the public will live vicariously through a Clinton or Obama presidency. Hopes will be high. The stakes will be high. The next vice president must be devoted as perhaps no vice president has been before to the task of making history work for the new president and the many things he or she will represent. Also, an Obama and Clinton presidency will also require massive legislative support on Capitol Hill. That will require skills in the cloakroom and the ability to hit the road and rally the public on behalf of the new president’s agenda. For this reason, a president Clinton will need a Senator Obama far more than a Vice President Obama. And a President Obama will need a Senator Clinton far more than a Vice President Clinton.

Lastly, for those who wonder if Obama or Clinton would need each other to defeat the Republican nominee (probably McCain), I can only say that most top Democratic strategists (those in both campaigns and those who remain neutral) tell me because Clinton and Obama break the mold, each will win or lose ENTIRELY on their own merits. The vice presidential pick, these strategists agree, will matter even less than before — which is next to not at all.

[rightsockjin]

Day 3

Summary: Day three rolled around with a challenge to the contestants and the producers in paradise. A thunder storm. What will happen when Y/N is terrified of thunder? Will anyone care? On another note, Y/N has gotten her first date card! Who will be the lucky man to accompany her on a fantastic date? Will it be Jungkook? Taehyung? Seokjin? Jackson? Or it could it be someone who isn’t even on the show? Will it be forever raining?

Rating: T (For mild nudity and sensual descriptions)

Word count:13,758

Hey guys so...if you’ve noticed, we have changed the entire blog to match the multi chapter story that we are currently following on the blog. This will be the norm. So the blog will be changing based on what is happening in the story every so often and there will be hints in posts and in the headers for the members on the master list. We’ve posted a mood board as well so feel free to heart it! Keep an eye on the blog! Things maybe be getting pretty weird from here on out.

I had a question for y'all. Would you want me to write what happens on other people’s dates? The dates that don’t involved Y/N, I mean. I can do one shots of those as well.

Another thought I had is that I'd like to make this interactive. SO I might put polls up on the blog for future dates and rose ceremonies and things like that. Would anyone vote?

Thanks for reading! If yo want to be tagged please send me an ask!

Maybe I could do asks for the characters as well as like part of the confessional? let me know! (You can send questions in starting now if you want!)

~AdminKim

Last time on BANGTAN in Paradise!

Things began with Seokjin and Y/N:

“It’s a beautiful day. There’s beautiful women,” he winked at you, “What’s not to be chipper about?”

“Also…I’m hoping that the date cards start to roll in soon. I’m anxious to be the first to take you out.”

And just as quickly seemed to take a turn for the worst:

“Look if you’re not interested, that’s fine, but don’t pretend to be interested.”

Alliances were made:

“Okay so here’s what I’m thinking. Things are going to get difficult really fast and when that happens, we’re going to need someone that we can trust.  A confidante. A safe haven. A sort of uh-”

“A friend?”

Jackson’s face brightened, “A FRIEND! Exactly! Yes, that’s what we will call it. Friendship! No one will know that we’re in cahoots if they just think they’re friends.”

“Or,” you paused waiting for him to look at you, “We could just be friends? Just a thought.”

An old rival appeared:

“Y/N! I’m so glad to see you,” she said hugging you before you could protest. You patted her back.

“Marie, how have you been?’

“Swell,” she said, pulling away, “I’m so glad to be back here! It looks like we both got a second chance at love huh?”

“Right, I-”

But she wasn’t much more interested in you. She walked past you and hugged Jackson. Your heart sank. You could feel the eyes on you. Pitying.

A bold confession was made:

“I just came to say that…I came here for you.”

“When they offered me the spot here, in Paradise, I was going to turn it down but when they mentioned that you would be here…” 

 “When they said to me ‘Y/N is going to be there’ I didn’t hesitate.”

“I needed to see you and while I realize that right now isn’t the right time to talk about all of this, I just want you to know…the first date card that I get, I will use it on you.”

 Two couple were formed:

“Looks like we have two couples set up in paradise then,” Yeonjun said wisely.

“Looks like it,” Taehyung agreed. If you would have looked at him, you would have seen a satisfied smirk on his face.

And Kim Taehyung showed his true colors:

Things were going to be different this time. Taehyung would make sure of it. Even if he had to be the one doing the hurting.

Will the two couples last? Has Jungkook given up on Y/N? Is Taehyung a bad person? What did Namjoon write on the paper he’d stuck to the ice chest? Will Seokjin ever forgive Y/N? 

Find out NOW ON:

BANGTAN IN PARADISE!

The next morning, you forwent the heat for your hair and braided two Dutch braids on your head instead.You tied a red silk scarf  around your head, two bunny ears on the right side. You decided that you would put on your swim suit then instead of coming back to the room to change. The day’s swim suit was all black and scrunched at the hips. It was a high waisted bikini with a small top. It had thick straps. But it wasn’t chunky. It sat comfortably on your shoulders. It had a lace up back that you struggled to pull tight enough, but you guessed you would be fine if it was a little bit loose as long as you were careful.

The straps suddenly dug into your shoulders and you remembered then that you had gotten sunburned the day before. When you had gotten back to your room, you had expected to see the aloe that Namjoon had helped you apply the day before somewhere in your room but when you hadn’t found it, you assumed you had been right and there was no real way to keep it cold unless it was in a fridge. You had instead applied your own gel but it was much less soothing than Namjoon’s had been. He’d been right in that sense. The cold temperature was much nicer on your burned skin.

Now, it had subsided a bit, but it still burned if your clothes dug in too harshly. You sighed, and pulled on a pair of towel shorts. The sandals that you had ruined the night before sat sadly in a corner. Your dress was stiff with chlorine. It had been so late the night before that you hadn’t had the energy to go and wash it. You took a gamble on the fabric, and though it wasn’t pleasant, the color hadn’t been bleached.

After applying a thick layer of seventy SPF all over your body, you opened your door. Instantly, you stopped in your tracks. A Styrofoam ice chest was at the foot of your door, a piece of paper was stuck to the lid. You looked around as if the person who had left it there was watching from around a corner.

Of course, no one was there. So you picked it up with both hands and set it down on your desk, closing the door behind you. You pulled the taped paper off of the lid. The handwriting was messy and rushed. Some of the letters bled into each other and were hard to read. You squinted at the ink trying to make out what it said.

I knocked a couple of times. You must be asleep. Here’s the gel for your sunburn. Sweet dreams.

-Namjoon and his cute dimples

You smiled, thinking about Namjoon cautiously knocking on your door in the middle of the night, trying not to be too loud so as not to wake anyone else. You imagined him calling your name a couple of times, hopeful that you could come to the door. Then, when there was no sign of you, he set the ice chest down and wrote you a note on his clipboard filled with papers, quickly and messily because he too was tired, and he didn’t want anyone to catch him. After that he might have placed a hand on the door and looked at the peep hole in disappointment that he hadn’t seen you before he knocked one final time, and left.

You shook the thought out of your head and set it aside carefully. You had half a mind to fold it up and tuck it away somewhere deep in your suitcase. Your little secret. But you held yourself back, remembering the cameras in your room. You instead pulled the Styrofoam lid from the cooler and were pleasantly surprised to see that, while a lot had melted, some ice had stayed solid. In the small pool, floated the blue gel and a plastic bag with something tan inside.

You pulled the plastic bag out first. There was a yellow sticky note inside. You pried it open and pulled out the note. Again, there was handwriting but this one was much less rushed and much neater looking. In contrast to the first paper, this handwriting almost looked like script from the olden days. It was almost calligraphy.

So I don’t have to wake up early. Here’s your mic. You know how to put it on. Just click the button on the left until the light turns green. TAKE IT OFF BEFORE YOU GO INTO THE WATER UNLESS YOU WANT TO DEAL WITH ME.

-Namjoon, your boss.

You giggled, setting the tan band aside and fishing out the aloe gel. You wasted no time in applying some to the affected area on your shoulders and on your neck. You applied some right under your eyes, feeling the sting travel all over your face but you didn’t mind. It felt amazing. Just like that, your day has been made. You felt ready to face the day and what it could bring. Hell! You might even be blessed with a date that day!

You set the gel back into the cooler and put the lid on securely hoping that the partially melted ice would keep it cold for later that night then slipped into the tan band that you were quickly becoming accustomed to. You did as Namjoon instructed and watched a small light at the top of the mic light. When you were satisfied that it was in the right place, you smiled at your room one last time then opened your door to leave.

If you had looked back as you closed it, you would have seen the note that Namjoon left you flutter down from the desk where you had left it. As it landed on the floor, it was swept under the desk by the resistance it faced. It landed face down. On the back, in big letters was a warning from Namjoon that you had missed and probably wouldn’t see. It sat innocently, staring up at the desk as if it wouldn’t have changed your entire Paradise experience.

“Morning y’all,” you said as you approached the cabana once again. Jorge was already behind the bar mixing a drink for someone, his red shirt bright and blaring. Before him sat Soobin and Jimin, who was sipping on a white wine. His eyes were a little puffy and his hair was mused. Soobin had a plate of what looked like Chilaquiles.

They both turned when they heard you speak and smiled brightly. Jimin moved over a seat and gestured for you to sit between them. You acquiesced with a graceful bow of your head. Jimin was possibly the shortest man in the villa but when you sat between him and Soobin, you realized he was taller than he seemed. You were dwarfed easily between the two.

“Sleep well Y/N,” Jimin asked instantly, ignoring your wide, surprised eyes. Before you answered, Jimin turned to Jorge and called him over.

“Yes Mr. Jimin,” he asked, setting a pretty cup of something blended in front of Soobin.

“Can you get Y/N some of this wine? It’s really fantastic.”

You opened your mouth to protest but Jimin’s own glass was shoved in your hands, his smile excited now.

“Try it Y/N! You won’t regret it I promise!”

You didn’t have the heart to refuse him. The way that he eagerly watched as you took the cup and carefully raised it to your lips was endearing. You let a miniscule amount pass your lips. Instantly, an explosion of flavor filled your mouth. Your taste buds sang. It was sweet and tangy at the same time. It made the side of your mouth pucker slightly. There was a hint of strawberry and what you thought was peach with an undertone of the regular grape you were used to. It was then that the aroma filled your nostrils. It was powerful. Like a perfume but not headache inducing. It was fancy. Much fancier than any wine you had ever purchased for yourself and not at all something that you would have expected Jimin to like.

“What do you think,” he asked, bouncing on the edge of his seat. He looked like he would explode if you didn’t answer him in the next five seconds.

“Wow,” you said eloquently, holding the clear liquid away from you to look at as if for the first time.

“Right,” he half yelled, turning you to face him with both hands on your bare knees. His hands were warm and encouraging.

“Yeah oh my God it's delicious!”

Jorge chuckled from behind you and placed a full glass in front of you. You handed Jimin his own glass back and turned back to the bar.

“Thank you Jorge,” you said, taking a bigger sip of your cup, “could I get some machacado con huevo?”

“I’m on it,” he said, turning towards the stove near the back. You took another, fairly large sip of your drink then let the taste simmer in your mouth.

Jimin giggled next to you. You furrowed your eyebrows. You turned to look at him but Jimin was looking at his glass. His wine level had gone down a good amount in the last couple of seconds.

“What are you giggling at Jimin?” You asked suspiciously.

“We indirectly kissed,” he said fingering the edge of the cup. You blushed immediately. Something about the way he said it made you feel like you had done something indecent.

You didn’t know how to answer but you must have looked shocked because the next second Jimin burst out laughing, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“I’m just messing with you Y/N! You’re so cute,” he laughed, patting the top of your head a couple of times.

You chuckled awkwardly. You hadn’t exactly thought of Jimin as a potential match since you saw that Jin was there when you arrived. He had been your main target, but now that he mentioned kissing him, you were more and more drawn to those lush lips of his. Jimin didn’t seem to be chasing after someone yet, and he seemed to carry less drama than Jin and Taehyung. Maybe it was time to change your tactics and your target.

“Don’t feel bad Y/N,” Soobin said, drawing your attention over to him, “Jimin hyung likes to flirt. Especially when he’s had a good amount of alcohol.”

Jimin reached across your body to push at the taller man. Soobin giggled but barely moved. You felt your heart sink slightly. You couldn’t get the hang of these shows. You never knew when someone was being genuine or when they were just putting on a show for the cameras.

Jorge placed a plate of the prettiest eggs you had ever seen. A slew of tortillas were fanned out on the side and two little cups of salsa’s sat next to your plate. It smelled heavenly.

“Thank you Jorge!”

Jorge tilted his head in appreciation and you dug in. You hadn’t realized how hungry you were.

“I do not! I’ve only had two glasses,” Jimin argued.

“Sure hyung,” Soobin said, drinking the last of his own drink. You tried to ignore them yelling over you. You unattractively scarfed down your food. Nerves were starting to build in your stomach again and it made you feel hungrier. When your eggs were gone, you were still hungry. You could have probably eaten another plate full.

“Good Morning everyone! Your day just got better.” You looked over to the cabana entrance. Enter Kim Seokjin, his hair loose and wavy from the water. His skin was slightly darker than the day before. He was wearing a button up with white birds and some striped swim trunks. He wasn’t wearing any shoes and once again, he had a ridiculous amount of sunscreen on. Behind him were Taehyung and Jungkook, both glaring at the back of his head. You felt your heart drop.

Jin looked over at the nearly empty cabana, his eyes skimmed over you, locking onto your own for a second. He raised an eyebrow then smiled slightly before he looked away. Butterflies fluttered in the pit of your stomach. Was there still a chance?

But then he was sitting at the empty table and Taehyung and Jungkook, like a scene from a movie, walked by you without a word. Taehyung smiled softly at you. Jungkook looked at the floor. In your head, you thought he regretted what he’d said to you before his date. He’d seemed to have a good time with Marie. You were almost positive that if he got a date card in the near future, he wouldn’t be using it as he had promised.

You cast your eyes down to your thighs where they touched the chair. It was too early to start crying. Too early to get hurt or feel hopeless but things in Paradise were not going your way and you dreaded being sent home. Being unwanted once again. You squeezed your hands to try and distract yourself from your emotion. In an instant, two hands were on your back one small one and one much bigger one. You raised your head slightly and were met with the caring eyes of Soobin and Jimin. You hadn’t known these men for long, but seeing their supportive gazes made you smile.

“Min,” Someone said from the now filled table. Three heads snapped over to the voice of Taehyung who was standing and waving Jimin over. In an instant, Jimin stood, his hand still patting your back and hissed.

“Coming Taetae,” Jimin said, but he didn’t move.

Jimin looked back at you, an apology in his eyes and on his lips, but you held no animosity towards him, nor did you blame him for going to sit with his friend.

“It’s okay, go.”

“Are you okay though?” He asked, the sincerity evident.

“I’m fine. I’m just going to finish my breakfast. Thanks for the wine recommendation! I’ll be sure to ask you for some more advice on it.”

Jimin smiled but not the way he had before. There was sadness in his expression that you weren’t sure was because of your own feelings. Before you could analyze his expression any more, he removed his hand and walked over to Taehyung and the table.

You watched as Jimin seamlessly fit into the group. He greeted each person as if they had known each other for years and sat next to Taehyung comfortably. You knew you weren’t exactly on the show to make friends, but you were feeling extra lonely at that moment.

You turned back to look at Soobin, grateful for his support as well. He opened his mouth to say something but just then, Yeonjun plopped down next to him in the empty stool.

With an awkward glance your way, he turned to greet his friend. You pat his arm to let him know it was alright, then turned back to your breakfast which was getting cold.

You slowly ate more and more, not really tasting the food as it passed your lips and entered your mouth. You sipped on your wine as well as more people filtered into the cabana. Some looked refreshed, some looked a little like zombies.

When Alex showed up, you had cleaned your plate, and noticed that there was no room for her to sit next to her friends, so you moved over and took your cup to finish off your wine. You also moved your plate so that she would feel more comfortable to sit.

Alex paused, looking at you as if you had grown a second head. She said nothing as she sat, but she stared at you as she got situated.

“Thanks,” she finally said.

“No problem,” your voice cracked. You groaned as emotion clogged your air way. You shook your head, upset at yourself for not being able to keep those emotions at bay or at least inaudible.

With what seemed to be great strain on her part, Alex sighed and turned to face you instead of the boy that had so quickly become her friend.

“Are you okay,” she questioned, though there was little emotion behind the words. You didn’t want to bother someone with your feelings. You never wanted to force someone to listen, so you just nodded, then stood, drinking the last of your wine in one go.

“Are you sure?” She asked again as you began to walk away.

“Fine,” was all you could say before a tear slipped down your cheek. How pathetic. Why were you crying? You couldn’t pinpoint it. Maybe it was the way that Jin had looked at you. Or the guilt that you felt at not pulling away from Taehyung. Maybe it was the way that Jungkook had told you he was there for you and yet, he seemed content already with another woman. Maybe it was all three. Maybe you felt guilty for playing these men in the span of three days and hurt because in the end, it looked like none of them actually wanted to date you.

You walked deeper into the villa that was so cleverly hidden by trees. You followed a trail you hadn’t seen before but you guessed that if you hadn’t seen it, then it was probable that no one else had ventured this way yet. Everyone had been too preoccupied with each other to fully appreciate the resort.

The slope of the ramp, covered in trees and stones that were set into the sandy ground was beautiful. The sun shone through the leaves of the palm trees and out of the corner of your eye, you noticed a small crab traversing over a rather big sand stone. You smiled at it as it too paused on its trek to look at you. The sun chose that moment to shine extra bright. The crab was trapped in its beam. Maybe three days away from reality, on a metaphorical island with some of the most attractive people you had ever seen, was already way too much for you but was that crab giving you puppy eyes?

Then in an instant, a cloud rolled through, the crab turned away, and you were left alone once again. It was almost an out of body experience. Like the you on the show wasn’t the you that you currently were.

The emotion you had been feeling was flushed from your system, given you still felt incredibly deterred and somewhat hopeless. You were no longer on the verge of tears. Still, you didn’t feel like going back into the fray, so you continued your trek up the slowly sloping path way.

When you finally reached the end, you were presently surprised to find a palapa with orange and tan couches as well as a woven straw coffee table. A sculpted, sand colored fan spun lazily over the lounge, barely giving off any actual wind.

This didn’t seem to bother the woman who was lounging almost as lazily on the couch, her tan bare legs thrown over the lap of a man who also seemed pretty unbothered by the heat of the day. He was leaning over her limbs, a laptop on the coffee table, and headphones on his head. You felt like you were intruding.

If you turned around now then maybe they wouldn’t notice you. But you were stuck. Something about the scene was so domestic. Calming. Yoongi wasn’t exactly focused on Julie and likewise, Julie wasn’t really paying attention to Yoongi, but they seemed…comfortable. Too comfortable. It was the third day, and they had met only a short time ago. How could they be on this level of comfort already?

You couldn’t stop watching, partially hidden by a low hanging palm tree. Yoongi stroked Julie’s leg affectionately every so often and Julie shot him a warm smile a couple of times. Under regular circumstances, you knew that you would be incredibly bored. Wouldn’t she want to get to know him better?

You waited for several more minutes. Waiting for anyone to say anything. The fan whirled, the wind blew lightly. The native birds chirped and the rest of the beach seemed to continue to move but the scene before you could have been paused. You held your breath out of fear that they would hear you, though you were really far away. Maybe you were being stupid. You should just walk in-

“Y/N?”

You jumped. All the blood in your face drained. He wasn’t exactly quiet so the two in the lounge snap their heads in the direction of the noise. The palm tree that had been covering you was blown away in that moment, exposing you. You tore your gaze from the couple and gave your attention instead to the voice that had startled you.

Your friendly neighborhood producer, Kim Namjoon stood behind you, his eyes wide at how you had reacted, worry on his features. Had he gotten tanner already? He seemed to be glowing. There was a bright aura surrounding him. The wind that had exposed you, blew into his hair. It fell away from his face like in a movie. It would have been a perfect shot. A close up, with the lights hitting directly behind him. Maybe a pretty pink filter. Maybe beautiful flower petals falling or…maybe a flare of the lens.

You were so lost in your own imagination that when Namjoon said your name, once, twice, three times more, you didn’t notice. It was like you had hit mute on the world and his lips were moving so minutely that you didn’t notice. You were entranced in his eyes. The scene in your head. You were entranced.

“Y/N,” he said one final time and this time, you heard it loud and clear. It jolted you from your mind’s movie. Yet, the filter you had seen wasn’t fading, the light from behind was still present. Still surrounding him. You blinked up at him, realizing that he was closer than you anticipated. Probably because of how quickly you had turned and that brief moment where you felt like you might pass out because of the fright he gave you.

“Are you alright?”

You shook your head, willing your mouth to speak.

“Dude,” you said, cringing internally at your choice of friendly term, “You scared me shitless!”

Why? Why were you so prone to these absolutely cringy slip of the tongue phrases when Namjoon was around? He must think you were so embarrassing. Suddenly, you wondered if his kindness was merely a product of his lack of confidence in your abilities. Maybe he felt as if you would end up alone and his advice and gestures were his way of pushing you to look better.

Namjoon raised both eyebrows then his lips pulled up into a smile like it always seemed to do. Was he perpetually happy?

“Sorry, dude,” He teased, “I didn’t mean to scare you. I just wanted to get your attention.”

“Did I somehow manage to break my mic again? Already?” You reached behind you, tapping the little black box that was meant to be transmitting your voice to the editors. Namjoon winced and quickly grabbed your arm to stop you from tapping on it any more. His hand was so big that it wrapped almost entirely around your forearm. His skin was warm, as per usual and a little moist. Probably from the day’s humidity. You realized then that he was sweating slightly. That would explain the glow from his skin.

“No! Nope. You’re mic is fine for once. I was just sent to find you because I have something to give you.”

You tilted your head up at him. What could he have to give you? Your mind went straight to the ice box that rested in your room.

“Oh? I got the gel from last night. Did you get me more?”

Namjoon rolled his eyes, “No. I think that you should have enough of that gel for the next six weeks, though let me know if you want me to bring you more ice.”

Namjoon let go of your arm and reached into his back pocket. He seemed to hesitate for a moment but then with renewed resolve, he presented you with something small and crème in color. Something you had seen many times before.

An envelope.

A date card.

Your eyes grew wide. You honestly didn’t expect to receive one any time soon. You expected for other people to ask you. Somehow you hadn’t given it any thought. The idea that you would get to choose never even crossed your mind.

You took the envelope with a trembling hand. Your mind was blank. Namjoon let you hold the paper. It was light. Almost nonexistent, yet the weight of your choice was heavy on your sun kissed shoulders.

“A date card.” It was a question, so why did it sound like a statement?

“Yeah,” Namjoon confirmed, sticking his hands in his pockets.

Then it was silent again. The clouds suddenly got much darker. Faint thunder sounded somewhere in the distance. A single thread of fear shimmied into your core. You hadn’t checked the weather this morning. Would it rain?

Namjoon wouldn’t look at you. He was staring down at the ground, his sandaled foot drawing circled on the sand dusted path way. A salamander rushed between you. The air stilled. Awkwardness seeped into the surrounding area like a plague.

“Mmm…thank you…I better,” you paused, “I better go…ask someone on this date I guess.”

“Right,” he agreed but didn’t move or look at you. The top of his head was shiny. His hair looked so soft. You itched to touch it but as you reached towards him, another voice, a very much feminine voice, interrupted.

You jumped apart, both of you, as if you were doing something you shouldn’t be. But you weren’t. Right?

“Did I just hear someone say ‘date card’?” Julie stood slightly above you on the path. A warm smile on her face that seemed to clash with the first impression of her that you had gotten. Her arms were crossed and she was looking at you and Namjoon knowingly.

“Uh yeah,” you said, blinking owlishly, “I got a date card.” You held it out for her to see. Her smile didn’t change. She didn’t reach for it. She said nothing. Unsettled, you put your hand down, holding the envelope tighter in your grip.

“Do you have any idea who you want to ask,” Julie finally said. Out of the corner of your eye, you looked at Namjoon uncomfortably.

“Oh I’m sorry, is he bothering you,” Julie asked, snapping your attention to her, your internal alarm going off instantly. She was pointing at the tall man off handedly. Her face was a mask of calmness that directly contradicted with your own panic. Namjoon’s head snapped up instantly. You could feel the fear emanating from him.

“No! Julie, he’s fine-” you began, but were cut off by the girl looking over at Namjoon with a quirk in her brow.

“Can’t argue there,” She joked just as Yoongi stepped up behind her.

“I-what?” You asked as she continued to look Namjoon up and down.

“He’s cute,” she continued, “don’t you think, Yoongi?” Yoongi’s amused smile preceded his reply. He looked up at Namjoon, who looked rooted to the place he was at. When he looked at Yoongi though, he seemed slightly more at ease. A plea on his features was evident.

“Namjoon? Yeah he’s pretty cute,” he laughed as Namjoon let his head fall back on his shoulders, clearly annoyed.

“Hyung,” Namjoon complained, his usually deep voice now whiney and, if you were honest, it did things to you.

“I’m only telling the truth, you ass. Take it or leave it.”

Namjoon pouted but didn’t argue further. Again, you were left confused. How was it that Namjoon was connected to multiple people? Taehyung made sense. He had already explained that, but Yoongi as well?

“Anyway,” Julie said, waving a hand in Yoongi’s face as if annoyed but her smile gave her away, “who are you going to ask on this date Y/N?”

The attention of the small group was suddenly back on you. Your heart thudded heavily. A face popped into your mind’s eye but you felt it would be inappropriate to say in current company. Though why that was…was evading you.

“I’m not sure,” you answered somewhat genuinely.

“You’re not going to ask this one are you? You can tell me! I won’t be mad,” Julie assured, pointing at Yoongi.

Yoongi gave her an exaggerated outraged look, almost questioning and incredulous. Yet, there was no hurt in his eyes or real threat. It was comical if you did say so yourself.

“Don’t look at me like that, it’s literally the third day,” she said with a wink.

“I thought you had a nice time,” his hands on his hips, his nose close to hers, his lips pulled over his teeth so they made a flat line. Julie only chuckled and pushed him back with a finger to the very tip of his nose. Yoongi scrunched it up and frowned. Julie giggled.

“I did,” she confirms, “but I wouldn’t want you to miss out on things with other people. I want you to know, know  that you want to be with me. It’s too early,” she emphasized, “to know if we’re end game.”

“End game? Like the Avengers?” He asked, looking genuinely confused.

“No, like endgame relationship wise.”

They bantered back and forth, and all of the silence from before was almost made up by how easily they talked in that moment. And somehow, you knew that even if you did want to ask Yoongi on this date, he would probably say no.

“I’m really not sure who I’m going to ask,” you interrupted as Julie began to explain the basics of romance book jargon.

“I think I’ll go back and let everyone know I have one though,” you said, though you didn’t really know if you wanted to go back to the beach. Another, far away roll of thunder sounded somewhere offshore. Your skin stood on end but you did your best to ignore it.

“Sounds like a plan,” Julie said turning back to the palapa her and Yoongi were frequenting, “oh and, don’t worry,” she continued looking at you from over her shoulder, “we won’t tell anyone about…” she looked over you to Namjoon who had been silently watching the exchange since Yoongi shut him up, “this incident.”

And honestly, you didn’t know what incident she meant.

Namjoon sat in his chair next to Sejin. His heart was pounding in his chest from a combination of the conversation he had just had and his run back to the production sight he frequented. Multiple people were sitting behind computers, making sure the many mics on the beach were well and working. It was kind of dark and quiet. There was air conditioning as well so when he had finally settled, he was happy to feel the cool air on his warm skin.

Sejin gave him a look which he ignored. Namjoon had been messing up a lot lately. From the day he had met you, he’d dropped the ball. It was… torturous to say the least. Ever since he had seen your audition tape, there had been a certain magnetic pull he’d felt. A sense of rightness that wouldn’t leave his head. At the time, he thought the feeling had been directed towards you and Jungkook and he hadn’t been totally wrong. He had seen the footage of you and Jungkook when he had finally realized how amazing you were. There was so much pride at having been the one to choose you that he almost hadn’t noticed the twang of jealousy he felt when he watched you two kiss. The operative word being Almost.

He’d ignored it at first. Ignored the pang of longing he felt when he watched you getting ready for the rose ceremony. Ignored the way that his heart hammered when he finally saw you all done up and radiating a confidence he seldom saw on a show like the bachelor. And finally, he ignored the pang of near anger he felt when Jungkook hadn’t called your name after kissing you and telling you that he would give you a rose. He had to sit back and watch as you walked out, covered in tears. It was so much worse now that he had actually spoken to you.

He had promised Sejin that he could handle it. He could be the one in charge of you and he wouldn’t meddle in the outcome of your season. And he really thought he could. It was obvious that you barely even knew he existed and had barely any interest in him as a person let alone romantically, so he thought that maybe even if you knew of him, if he got a taste of what it would be like to spend time with you…he would be fine. He could keep his distance. Namjoon was a professional.

Wrong. He was so wrong. So wrong that it was laughable. Maybe not even laughable because of how mistaken he had been. You were funny. You were sweet. You were…real…and he didn’t even blame himself for whatever feelings he was feeling anymore. Still, in the span of three days, he had broken so many rules of the show just because he didn’t want you to go through what you had gone through before. He’d already gotten a talking to from Sejin on multiple occasions. He was treading on thin ice but he couldn’t bring himself to care.

“So,” Sejin said as Namjoon ran his hands through his hair and patted his chest right over where his heart was, “everything went well I see.”

It was a solid thirty seconds before he had managed to process Sejin’s words and come up with something to say. Because what could he say? He’d done what was asked of him and completely forgot to ask if you felt alright. As soon as he had gotten in that morning, after sleeping in for an extra hour, he had seen you walking alone with very clear tears in your eyes and he almost wished for you to once again break your mic so he could go talk to you.

The perfect opportunity had presented itself when Sejin gave him a date card that was meant for you. Still, he’d completely forgotten to ask about your emotional well-being in favor of being completely awkward and submissive in the face of ridiculous insinuations by someone who had no idea what they were talking about.

“I got her the date card, if that’s what you mean,” Namjoon groaned.

“Yes, it looks like it. And it looks like you also managed to not interfere this time. I’m proud of you Namjoon,” Sejin joked, patting him on the back.

“Don’t patronize me hyung,” Namjoon begged, “I am perfectly capable of getting my job done properly.”

Sejin chuckled, “I know that,” He assured, “yet, you’ve been making a lot of mistakes lately. Lots of slips of the tongue, don’t you think?”

Namjoon didn’t answer. Instead he pulled his clipboard over to him from where he had set it down before he left. A jagged edge of yellow paper stuck up at an odd angle. He paid it no mind. Instead he stared at the new blank page where he should be writing ideas for new dates and angles for the show, willing his brain to work. To think of something that the contestants might like and would be interesting for the viewers but he couldn’t think of anything. He kept picturing beautiful night skies, and lanterns and picnics. Things that, under other circumstances would make fantastic dates but in this case, were much too simple and ordinary.

“Look,” Sejin interrupted much more seriously, “If it’s any consolation, if everything works out the way we would like, she’s going to be happy.”

It should be a consolation. He should be happy even if after six weeks he would never see you again. He should want the best for you but if he was being honest, he hated the idea of you with someone else. He hated the idea of you theoretically marrying someone who wasn’t him. Someone he knew…someone who didn’t deserve you.

“Yeah,” he said instead, “it does make me feel better.”

And it did. For about three seconds. Then he saw you back at the cabana with a date card and a very happy, smiling man standing next to you. It was only fitting that it began to rain heavily right then and everyone scattered. The weather sure was perceptive.

Thunder rolled through the clouds. The wind had picked up quite a bit in the last hour and a half but there was the slimmest chance or rain. Taehyung simply ignored the slight chill and took the opportunity to cuddle up to Kitty who had been inseparable from his side since the night before. He had to admit, this wasn’t his intention when he had cozied up to you in the pool previously. It was more so, his intention to get himself back on your good side and to show that he was, however little, interested in you. The girls had the power this week and there were so many men in Paradise that he wanted to make sure that he had one foot in a boat and one on a life raft.

Truthfully, Kitty seemed pretty content with giving him a rose this week and he didn’t exactly foresee anyone stealing her attention from him but at the same time, he wasn’t really interested in her. No, see, Taehyung had come onto the show because he had heard that you were going to be there and he knew very well that many of the other men had also come on for this very reason. They would be crazy not to. You were charming, beautiful and smart to top it off but he also realized that all of these men would be pursuing you. Hence, his need to find a life raft.

What he hadn’t counted on, however was your self destructive tendencies. Seokjin had been his first worry, if he was honest. He seemed very keen on getting to date you and you him, but that had fallen apart quicker than he had anticipated. Then there was the threat of Jungkook and his insistence that he would make up for his past mistakes. Truthfully, he hadn’t been worried in that aspect. He’d royally screwed up. He didn’t foresee him getting a second chance. That was why he had befriended the boy so early on.

It was when Jungkook had told him of his plans for when he got his first date card that he began to feel a bit of worry niggling at his heart. All had been solved, or depending on how one were to look at it, destroyed, when Marie had appeared. He had been relieved, then suddenly worried for an entirely different reason. With no prospects for whom you were to date, your rose and confidence were in jeopardy.

He couldn’t have that. He couldn’t let you leave. Not when he hadn’t even gotten the chance to properly speak to you. Not when…he hadn’t even had the chance to show you that this coldness, this- this fuck boy persona, wasn’t him.

Then a totally curve ball was thrown his way when none other than Jackson Wang took an interest in you. He didn’t seem your type. He was much too…big. Macho. He had the whole frat boy thing down to an art. He had almost laughed when he had seen him talking to you as you tried, in every way possible, to evade him. His laugh had caught in his throat when you sat on one of the outdoor beds that were littered around the hidden beach and stayed there as he watched you, as covertly as he could, while you surfed and laughed and later ate.

He would deal with that when the time was right. He stood by his initial judgment. Jackson Wang was not the man for you and you would realize that soon. Be it on your own or by his own hand. He would make sure of it. For the time being, he assumed that having a potential love interest would keep you sated.

Kitty pulled on his arm then, pulling him from his thoughts. He could smell the hint of rain over the pungent smell of sea water. While the thunder was far, he couldn’t help but wonder If the wetness he was feeling on his cheeks was rain or that of sea water. He pulled her tighter to his side, for the simple reason that he was leeching off her warmth. She smiled up at him happily. A hint of guilt panged in his heart but he pushed it aside.

Jimin was sitting next to her, his head resting in his hand as he spoke to Alex, who had seemed uncomfortable at first but now seemed much more relaxed as she continued her conversation. Seokjin was talking animatedly to Holly and to Jungkook. The group laughed occasionally. Obnoxiously. But Taehyung didn’t really care. He wasn’t exactly there to make friends. It was better that they all thought he was their friend. He was sure of that, but he was going to have a hard time putting up with some of these mannerisms.

“Hey guys,” the unmistakable voice of yours said, snapping everyone’s attention to the Cabana entrance.

You looked nervous and it only took the whole of the group two seconds to realize why. There was a very familiar looking envelope in your shaking hands. Instantly, Taehyung assumed that you would be asking Jackson. He tried to ignore his slight jealousy at that notion but then he realized…Jackson wasn’t in the cabana. His blood ran cold. Who else could you ask? Did you simply not know that Jackson wasn’t present? Were you here to rub in the magnificent date that you were sure to have?

His eyes shot over to the two youngest boys. Did you maybe want to ask one of them out? Maybe you had a Noona kink. Maybe they did? Then he looked at Jimin, who had sat up straight at the sign of what was presumably the piece of paper in your hands. He’d mentioned that you guys had had a decent conversation earlier before he’d been called over to sit with him. He shot Jimin a betrayed look over the head of the girl who was wrapped around him but the shorter man didn’t notice.

“I’m really sorry to disrupt everyone but I uh,” she held up the envelope awkwardly, clearly not knowing how to handle the situation, “I have a card…”

You could hear a pin drop. If he didn’t like you, he would be annoyed at the coy act you were putting on but the butterflies in his chest made it endearing. Could he be mistaken? Were you going to ask him?

Suddenly, you looked directly into his eyes, as if you could hear his thoughts and then it hit Taehyung like a ton of bricks. He was currently sitting in a booth and squished into his side was a very brunette, very possessive woman who was staring daggers at the true object of his affection.

Instantly, he tried to pry her off his arm but she was stuck. Like a leach. All the blood drained from his face as he saw your eyes dart to Kitty’s then at his then away once again. He followed your gaze and watched it fall on the group he had been watching earlier. Holly had a hand on Seokjin’s shoulders as if that meant she had dibs on him. Seokjin made no real move to get away from her aside from stiffening slightly under her touch. His ears were a little red at the tips.

Jungkook was nearly identical to his hyung. His ears were tinted red, his body rigid and stiff. Marie was looking at him, worry evident in her eyes. She had a smile on her face that Taehyung knew was for the cameras, which, if he were to look around, were everywhere. This must be an intense moment that the editors were planning. Much like Marie’s arrival. He could see multiple camera men and producers hovering around the group. He instantly searched for Namjoon but realized that he wasn’t with the usual camera man.

It struck him as odd but he didn’t pay it much mind as you began to talk again.

“Am I supposed to read this? Should I just ask someone?”

“Read it,” Soobin said from somewhere near. Taehyung didn’t care to know where. You, obedient as ever, opened the flap and pulled out the thin paper from inside. Your eyes skimmed the letter, once, twice, then finally you looked up and with a strained smile and read out loud.

“Y/N, I hope you’re hungry for some romance! Pick-nic yourself a partner to share some delicious conversation with! Your date leaves in two hours!”

You looked around hopefully, like you were waiting for someone to ask you on the date and not the other way around. Then, as if you came back to yourself, you shook your head and looked back at the letter. It was like you were building your confidence up. Taehyung’s heart thudded harder against his rib cage. Again, he tried to pry Kitty from his arm but she clung on tighter. She was glued to him. His hopes were unbelievably high. He had a chance. He just knew it. He could win you over if you just gave him a chance-

“Seokjin,” you said and it was like all the life was drained from his body, “If I recall correctly, you have very good taste when it comes to food…” you paused. You twirled one of your braids in your free hand and bit your lower lips. Taehyung could almost feel the nerves radiating from you all the way to where he was sat.

“Would you…maybe want to go on this date with me?”

Everyone’s eyes snapped to the aforementioned man. Holly was basically digging her nails into Seokjin’s shoulder. Her body frozen as she watched his expression shift from fear to shock then finally, flattery.

“I-why-I mean- yes! Yeah, of course! Thanks for asking me.”

He stood from his elevated seat, Holly pulled her hands from his body as if burned. She looked absolutely dejected. Seokjin shot her an awkward and apologetic smile but walked over to you. His thick lips pulled over his perfect teeth.

Huh… for someone who was pretty hurt only a day ago, he sure seemed excited. He’d done a full 180.

Taehyung’s heart sank into his stomach, watching as you spoke excitedly to the perfect man before you. It looked like the game was back on and he couldn’t phone it in for much longer.

Like hawks, the camera men and producers swarmed the cabana, pulling different people to interview. Jungkook was one of them. He wasn’t surprised. Though honestly, he couldn’t say two words about what he was feeling even if he knew every language in the world.

His interview went along the lines he had expected. What did he feel? What just happened? Was he hurt? Yadda yadda yadda…

It wasn’t until he was sitting back in his seat next to Marie that it all hit him like a ton of bricks. Literally. Well almost. The rain poured down from the heavens by the buckets. Thunder reverberated through his entire body. In an instant, everyone was on their feet and running for their assigned rooms. People were covering their heads. Seokjin and you separated and ran towards your respective rooms. In the back of his head, a voice spoke to him about destiny and the wrongness of your choice. He did feel a little bad. There was no way that Seokjin and you would go on your date now and anyone who would arrive that day wouldn’t even be able to meet anyone if everyone was stuck in their rooms. Production would have to shut down for the time being.

He watched you run to your room as he finally got to his senses and took off toward his own residence. Marie yelled something over at him that he didn’t hear and quite honestly, didn’t care about. His focus was on the way you were running. You had your hands over your chest, you kept tripping over your own feet and if he wasn’t mistaken, were you…crying? Had the disappointment hit you that hard already?

It was a second later that Jungkook made up his mind to go after you to make sure you were alright since your supposed date wasn’t anywhere in sight…he was probably off somewhere making sure his hair wasn’t frizzy… but it was a second too late. Past him ran a very wet and very fast Taehyung. He was sprinting. His wet hair was in his eyes and droplets ran down his perfect nose.

Defeat plagued Jungkook then, his jog much slower now. Discouraged. He felt a frown tug at his lips and his shoulders slumped. He made it to the place where the rooms were. A small ledge stood between him and the pouring rain. He stood there for a couple more seconds. A flash of lightning lit up somewhere nearby. Instinctively, he counted the seconds before he heard the thunder. It was five seconds. Five miles away.  

Thunder roared in his ears. Somewhere ahead, he heard a girl scream. His heart jumped as well. Finally, he realized that being outside at the moment wouldn’t be the smartest thing to do, so he ran the rest of the way to his room and locked himself in.

The air conditioning hit his wet skin like ice. Goosebumps pimpled on his skin. Without hesitating, he pulled the shirt over his head and let it fall to the floor. It plopped unattractively, making an almost instant puddle on the floor.

He groaned as the air hit his abs hard. It felt like a hard slap to his skin as the water dripped down the ridges of his muscles. His body stiffened under the temperature. He began to shiver. Every muscle in his body flexed trying to warm him up. His shorts, actual shorts he’d chosen to wear that day instead of swim trunks, clung to the thick skin of his thighs.

He knew he should take them off but his hands weren’t cooperating. They were balled into fists at his sides, his nails were digging into his palms painfully.

Almost instantly, he recognized another, much bigger--if he was in his right head he might have cracked a smile at his own thought--problem was presenting itself.

In his heavy, wet shorts, under his soaked underwear, blood had rushed to his member. This was the down side of having a pain kink. It, of course, didn’t always work this way but it seemed that something was really doing it for him in that moment.

He groaned again, shifting uncomfortably. Behind his eyes, flashes of girls began to manifest. He clenched and unclenched his fists trying to ignore the urge to do something about his semi. He forced himself to open his eyes. He tried to focus on something in the room. Anything. But there was nothing in the small room of his to distract him.

With all the strength he had left, Jungkook ripped his shorts off along with his underwear. He forced his eyes to stay directly before him then picked up his beach towel. He carefully dried himself off, avoiding his very obvious erection.

It was hard. No pun intended. It was difficult for him not to indulge in what he really wanted to do. Your face popped in his head like the erection had popped up earlier. It twitched in the free air. Your smile, your eyes, the way you fidgeted nervously earlier when-

And it began to sink. The thought of you going out with another man really put a damper on his almost fantasy. He let his mind go over the events of the last couple of minutes. His heart sank with his erection and then suddenly, it was gone. Jungkook was still a little cold but his pain was no longer physical.

Tears brimmed his eyes and he made no effort to slow them. Instead, he stood in the middle of his room, partially covered by a cyan blue beach towel with his heart in his throat. He’d made a mistake once again. He shouldn’t have said yes to Marie. This one, was completely on him.

Your heart hammered hard against the cage of your ribs. Your skin was soaked to the bone though you didn’t really notice it. You didn’t notice the multitude of tiny scratches that had started to appear on the tops of your feet as you tripped over yourself and stepped on tiny pebbles and shells that were a little too sharp and a little too hidden for your liking.

You didn’t realize that the droplets of water running down your cheeks weren’t drops of rain but in fact thick salty tears. You didn’t feel the weight of your braided hair getting heavier and heavier with rain water. You also didn’t notice how cold your body was because of the sudden gust of wind.

What you did notice was your door was firmly closed and the thunder and lightning were getting closer together and that meant that the lighting was closer to you. You also noticed how, even though you had been running at the, well… speed of lightning, you didn’t feel at all tired.

Maybe it was because, in that moment, you weren’t in your body. You were watching yourself run, instead. As if you had traveled into the future and you were watching back the show. In your out-of-body self, you laughed as you ran. The fear in your eyes was funny to you for some reason. Perhaps it was because you knew, somewhere in your subconscious that there was nothing to be scared about. Maybe it was because future you knew exactly what would happen in the next couple of minutes. Maybe it was because…future you knew the mistakes you were going to make over the course of the six weeks.

You rammed through your bedroom door, your wrist snapping, what should have been, painfully but you didn’t care. You wanted to get out of the rain, away from the noise. You wanted to hide under your blankets. You wanted to be held.

Before you could shut the door just as forcibly as you had opened it, another arm stopped it. It was then that you realized what was going on. You were forced back into your body. The fear intensified tenfold as the hand on your door pushed.

You didn’t try to fight back. You let whomever it was, push the door open. You stepped back feeling helpless. In walked Taehyung, his face set in an inquisitive expression. It was like he didn’t want to give away his real emotions. You opened your mouth to ask why he was in your room but in that moment another loud beat of thunder hit and all the blood drained from your face. Your legs gave out from under you. You braced yourself to hit the floor and were not disappointed. You butt hit first, then your wrists to hold you up. You knew it would bruise. It was already painful even through your stupor.

Taehyung shut the door firmly behind him then, as if dropping a mask, his features shifted in worry. He shuffled over to you and kneeled down, his hands on his knees as he watched more tears stream down your face.

Hesitantly, he reached out to touch you but you shied away from his touch. A flash of hurt shone in his eyes like the lighting that shone outside your door. Another flash, more lightning and your body flinched painfully. You brought your aching hands up to cover your ears.

Pathetic. You knew in the back of your head that you probably looked like a child. How attractive. Your vision was so blurry that you weren’t even sure if you were seeing him correctly.

“Y/N?”

His voice was soft, almost a whisper, like he was scared to speak too loudly. Maybe he thought it would make you scared too.

You took in deep breaths, trying to calm yourself down. It was just thunder. It was just a little bit of rain. Nothing would happen to you as long as you stayed inside. As long as you-

Another thunderous roar vibrated in your skull. The irrational part of you wept in terror. You pushed your hands closer to your ears. Trying to drown out the sound. You hadn’t brought your sound proof headphones. You didn’t think it would rain like this. You expected it to be pleasant while you were in Paradise. You thought the most you would get would be a drizzle. But boy had you been clearly wrong.

“Hey,” Taehyung spoke again, trying to get your attention again. His tone was so gentle, soothing. You wanted to melt into it. Your body shivered under the intense blast of the cooling system but you couldn’t bring yourself to move. Your hair dripped onto the floor. A puddle quickly forming beneath you.

He reached for you again and this time you didn’t flinch away. His fingers caressed your wet cheek, wiping away the tears and rain water that was dripping from your scalp. You melted into his touch. The bit of physical touch grounded you slightly.

“It’s okay,” he whispered, scooting a little closer so that his knees touched your shins. He placed his other hand on the other side of your face. He brushed both thumbs over your smooth skin. His own skin caught on yours as the water began to disperse and dry.

“You’re not alone anymore, Y/N,” he insisted, tilting your head up so you could look at him, “As long as I’m here, everything will be okay.”

The cynic in you wasn’t exactly convinced by his words but when another loud rumble hit, you couldn’t help but ignore that voice. It was possible it would help not to be alone…for once in your life.

Without much thought, you leaned forward and clung onto Taehyung’s waist. You were shaking. He could tell and he was a little surprised that you were hugging him. Up until then, he had been the one showing any affection and you were only putting up with him. Or at least it seemed.

Taehyung wrapped his arms loosely around your shoulders. The weight of them brought you back even more. You could hear the pitter patter of the rain outside, still falling heavily, but you could also hear the inhale and exhale of Taehynug’s breath on your wet neck.

“Are you cold? You should change out of these clothes,” he said, starting to stand slowly. He helped you up as well, still held in his arms, like he was trying to push all of your floating pieces back together.

You did your best to help him help you. Your legs were still wobbly but you were starting to regain some feeling in them. When you were firmly standing, the soles of your feet pushed into the cheap material of your flip flops, you felt your body start to function regularly once again.

The haze in your brain began to fade and clear. You looked up at Taehyung with wide eyes. Like you had just realized he was there and you were holding him close. Your clothes stuck to each other. You were standing on a pool of water. It was in that instant that the discomfort hit you.

You shivered again, this time more violently and not because of the weather. Taehyung held you closer, a squelch escaping your clothing. You groaned, slightly embarrassed.  He pulled away so he could look at you directly. At some point, your tears had slowed and you could see him better. His hair was plastered to his head. Strands of it hung on his face, darker than it was before, if that was even possible, with strands hanging in his asymmetrical eyes. Asymmetrical. Unique. Taehyung was unique. Perfect in a different way than the way that Seokjin seemed to be.

His lips were a bit on the thin side and seemed to always be pouty. He had a big nose, nothing too crazy but you had noticed it before, when you had first seen him on his season. He also always seemed to have a slight shadow on his chin and his upper lip. There was a little stubble there. Short and fine. Would it be scratchy if you touched it? His tummy wasn’t toned. Not the way that Jungkook’s was but honestly, you didn’t really mind. In your opinion, he looked good. Felt good. It didn’t really matter to you if he was toned or not.

“Do you want me to leave so you can change-”

Then it hit again. Behind the curtains of your window you saw the flash before you heard it. And it was like a punch in the stomach. It was easy to laugh at yourself when it wasn’t happening, but in these moments, you really felt like it was the end of the world.

A small scream was ripped from your throat. Taehyung’s eyes widened. As your knees buckled again. He held you up, then sat you in the only chair in the room. You were quivering. It was getting old. This fear. Why couldn’t you be normal?

“Do you have headphones or something?” Taehyung asked, starting to move things around on your bed. When you didn’t answer, he looked back at you to make sure you were alright.

“You don’t have to talk okay? Just shake or nod your head.”

Slowly, you nodded. He smiled a small line that added to his perfect uniqueness. Where had this Taehyung been for the last couple of days? This was the Taehyung that the world had fallen for…and one you could see yourself falling for as well.

“Do you have headphones?”

You nodded again slowly.

“Are they in this room?”

Another terrifying boom. Your body tensed.

With renewed fervor, Taehyung turned your bed upside down, searching for them. You wanted to yell at him that he wouldn’t find them. That you hadn’t brought them but you couldn’t make your voice work. You simply sat, and watched as he frantically searched. Then, with a frustrated growl, he looked over at you once again.

“Don’t move from there. I’ll be right back,” he assured. Without waiting for you to say anything, he threw the door open and ran out of your room. Somehow, this made it so much worse. Maybe it was because now the door was open wide and you could hear everything much clearer. Maybe it was because you were alone again.

A multitude of sobs escaped your body. Your energy was quickly depleting. You made yourself count. What you were counting you couldn’t be sure. But you counted slowly in your head.

One, two, three…

A gust of wind pushed your door open further. It hit the wall violently. The noise startled you slightly.

Seven, eight, nine…

Goosebumps erupted all over your exposed skin. Your brain buzzed with anticipation. You squeezed your eyes shut. You pressed your hand over your heart, feeling for its beat.

Thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen…

You heard footsteps splashing on the way to your room. In your mind’s eye, you saw Taehyung running back towards you. Your fear ebbed slightly. You didn’t want to be alone. The sooner he got there the better.

You took a deep breath as the steps reached your door. They were heavy, and panicked. Almost as panicked as you felt. Ragged breathing followed, as if he had run miles to get back to you. In an instant, you felt his presence before you. You heard the door close and something was placed over your head. Something heavy and soft, that covered your ears. At first static filled in the noise, but in a matter of seconds, loud music replaced it.

There were no lyrics to the music. It was instrumental. Lo-Fi maybe. It was smooth, soothing. Your heart stuttered under your palm. The tightness in your chest began to fade. Breathing started to become much easier. Less labored. Without meaning to, you sighed in relief.

Two large hands landed on your knees, still wet from earlier. The warmth from them seeped into your body. A wave of slight embarrassment coursed through you at the display you’d given in the last hour.

Something soft, and dry was thrown over your shoulders. A towel, you assumed and it was then that you opened your eyes. You smiled down at Taehyung-

But it wasn’t Taehyung. Before you, like the time before when you were having a slight panic attack, Namjoon was squatting before you, his eyes worried, concern on every feature. And you wondered why you hadn’t guessed just by the way he’d once again comforted you the way that he had then.

He spoke without thinking, but then when you only stared back at him, he shook his head and mouthed, “are you okay?”

You nodded, still not completely trusting your voice to speak.

Namjoon smiled and pulled the towel closer around you, nuzzling you in its warmth. It kind of smelled like him. Like  wood and parchment and something soothing like cotton.

The door to your room suddenly slammed open. You didn’t actually hear it, as the headphones on your head prevented you from doing so but you saw it out of the corner of your eye. In came Taehyung, fear in his eyes and a bag in his arms.

When he saw Namjoon leaning down before you, his expression changed from scared to annoyed. He rolled his eyes but closed the door behind him. You blinked at Namjoon but he wasn’t looking at you anymore. He was looking over at Taehyung, a bit of shock in his eyes.

You couldn’t be sure of what happened next but Namjoon removed his hands from your body and stood up right. He towered over the younger boy but he was hunched over. Like he was scared.

Taehyung let the bag fall under your desk. You watched as he spoke to the producer. Namjoon had his back to you so you couldn’t even try to read his lips though by his body language, you could tell he was on the defense.

Taehyung seemed to be yelling. He gestured towards you with his hands but Namjoon kept his gaze forward. Taehyung looked at him expectantly then when no one moved, he opened the door and gestured out of it. Namjoon’s shoulder’s slumped but he walked towards the door. He stopped once more, said something to Taehyung, then without a single look back, he walked out into the storm.

Taehyung didn’t know what to think of the scene before him. His heart wrenched into his throat. Namjoon was holding a clean towel over your shivering body. You were smiling down at him appreciatively. There was a set of heavy looking headphones over your ears and you were no longer crying. You looked much more peaceful.

Taehyung couldn’t help but roll his eyes. He’d done it again. Namjoon had interrupted you in the middle of something that could have led to something more. He couldn’t understand it. On the last show he had been on, Namjoon had been nothing but professional. He was only seen when absolutely necessary and had even chastised multiple other people for interfering when it wasn’t needed. So why, now, was he the one making these mistakes?

Namjoon looked at Taehyung rightfully surprised. He looked slightly uncomfortable, as if Taehyung had walked in on you and Namjoon and not the other way around, which…in a way he had been the one to but that was beside the point. The producer stood up from his crouched position. He stuck his hands in his pockets. His shoulder hunched.

Taehyung dropped the bag in his hands under the desk in your room. His blood was boiling.

“What are you doing here, hyung?”

Namjoon closed his eyes at Taehyung’s tone. Somewhere in the back of his head, he realized that he was being rude and should probably tone down his theatrics but he couldn’t help it. He really felt like he had made real progress that day and he had enough competition on the show without someone else making moves on you as well.

“I can see what you guys are doing, Taehyung. She looked distressed and I knew what to do to help. That’s all,” he said almost in an exhausted way.

“That’s all? That’s all?! Hyung, this is the second time in three days that you pull something like this-”

“Something like what?”

“Something like a romantic gesture!”

Namjoon blinked at his charge, then looked down at his feet. Taehyung was breathing heavily, like he was using all his energy to be upset. He didn’t know what he wanted to hear from his producer but he needed answers.

“If you think,” Namjoon began, his voice low and dangerous but Taehyung was unphased, “That helping a woman who is clearly distressed to feel better is a romantic gesture then you have a weird idea of romance, Kim Taehyung.”

“Don’t turn this on me hyung,” Taehyung half yelled, scared that you could hear, but you seemed completely lost so he wasn’t too worried.

“Y/N came onto this show to find love-”

“I know that-”

“With someone on the show, Hyung! Not with a producer!”

Instantly, Taehyung knew he’d overstepped. Namjoon’s eyes widened, then lidded. His shoulders fell. He hung his head in what could be shame or embarrassment…or hurt.

“I know, Taehyung. I was the one who picked her for the show in the first place.”

A sudden coldness swept through the room. Taehyung hardened his expression and pointed out the door as he pulled it open.

“Then leave hyung. I have it covered,” then as an afterthought he added, “I actually have a chance with her.”

The pain in Namjoon’s expression only deepened. Without retaliating, Namjoon followed Taehyung’s gesture. Every step seemed like agony and Taehyung could tell that he wanted to look back at you but he didn’t. When he was almost out of the room, he turned to look at Taehyung and under his breath said:

“Let her know when the storm blows over that her date with Seokjin is postponed until further notice. Also, that I’ll come get the headphones later.”

He deserved it. Taehyung knew he did. But the way that Namjoon hissed another man’s name felt like a slap to the face. Because it was Namjoon who had chosen you to be on the shows and he clearly was a fantastic judge of character. And Taehyung knew that it was Namjoon who had gotten Seokjin on the show as well. If he was approved by the producer, then there was no way that Seokjin wouldn’t be a fantastic date and a fantastic partner.

Namjoon went out into the rain. Taehyung watched him walk away, the droplets hitting his hair. He was wearing a raincoat but he didn’t seem to care if he was getting wet. He was too harsh…but he wasn’t going to let Namjoon get in his way.

“Hyung,” He yelled after him. Namjoon looked over his shoulder, hopeful, for what Taehyung wasn’t sure but he was about to dash those hopes…for your benefit.

“If I catch you and her like this again…I’ll go complain to the director.”

And he closed the door without looking back. His heart ached slightly. He’d always liked Namjoon and genuinely considered him a friend. But he couldn’t risk his happiness once again.

You were looking ahead, away from the door. He thought he saw a single tear roll down your face but he paid it no mind. It was probably left over from the fear, or maybe from your hair being soaked.

He leaned under your desk and grabbed his bag, filled with snacks and a comfy sweater he thought you might like and a weighted blanket he never traveled without as well as his own set of headphones that he clearly wouldn’t need anymore.

He made to straighten but then a yellow sheet of paper caught his eye. In bold, clear letters, he saw his own name. He glanced at you once again over his shoulder but you were still looking away, holding the towel to your body. He picked up the paper and read:

Be careful with Kim Taehyung

His heart sank. He knew the hand writing. So it seemed that Namjoon was trying to sabotage him. This made him feel better about what he had said to him. Had you read this already? He wasn’t sure, but he didn’t want to take any chances. He crumpled the paper and tucked it in his pants pocket which was still wet, but who cared if the paper disintegrated?

He wasn’t going to take any chances.

It rained for the rest of the day. The thunder and lightning had stopped after the first two hours and you were able to take off the headphones that Namjoon gave you then. You parted with the towel reluctantly when Taehyung had left to change and told you that he had brought you a sweater of his to wear if you wanted.

You did, in fact, put it on. It was incredibly big and hit somewhere near your midthigh. You decided to put on a pair of comfortable sweat shorts under and then pulled out the other things in the bag. It was strangely heavy. The mystery of why that was was quickly solved when you pulled out an extremely thick, dark blue blanket. Then you saw the snacks and a pair of headphones that he had probably brought for you.

He was sweet. You were really glad he had noticed something was wrong, though you weren’t sure how he knew. It was nice to not be alone during one of your episodes. It made you feel warm inside that he seemed to actually care. The idea of Kitty briefly crossed your mind but he wasn’t with Kitty was he?

You felt giddy. On cloud nine. When there was a knock on your door, you jumped at the chance to speak to Taehyung again.

Alas, once again, you were wrong about the identity of the person at your door. Your heart stopped when Seokjin was the one standing at your door. You felt sleazy. Like he’d caught you cheating on him with another guy. Not that that was possible since you weren’t exactly dating but that didn’t help in the slightest. On top of that, Taehyung was probably on the way back as well.

“S-Seokjin?”

“Who else did you expect, baby?” He asked with a slight chuckle. Then he saw what you were wearing and his face fell.

“Oh…did I interrupt something?”

“No!” you practically yelled opening the door wider, “I’m alone. I-”

How do you even begin to explain what had just happened? It was incredibly embarrassing.

“So is that sweater yours then?”

Seokjin didn’t wait for an answer. He walked into the room with all the confidence in the world. His eyes skimmed the space. The puddle on the floor and the snacks on the bed.

“What were you doing? Were you going to watch movies or something like that?”

“I um…”

“Can I join you? I just got word from the production staff that our date would be postponed until the weather got better. Still, I’d like to spend the rest of the day with you if that’s alright? Think of it like a pre date!”

He looked so excited. So happy. How could you possibly say no?

You smiled at him, about to agree when another knock drew your attention. Seokjin raised an eyebrow then without asking, he walked over to the door and pulled it open.

Enter Kim Taehyung, his hair slightly more dry and in a pair of pjs dotted with what looked like hearts.

“Taehyung-ah,” Seokjin asked.

“Hyungnim? What are you doing here?”

“Y/N and I were just about to watch some movies together. Why are you here? In your pajamas?”

Taehyung gave you a look over Seokjin’s shoulder but you said nothing. Guilt filled you to the brim. You felt like you were leading these two men on and yet… they were doing the same. With Kitty and Holly. Should you even feel bad?

“Movies?”

“Yeah… so if you could just come back later then-”

“Sounds fun,” Taehyung cut him off with a satisfied smirk, “count me in.”

Taehyung pushed his way past the older man who looked at you incredulously. You groaned, shrugged your shoulders and looked at the younger man.

“What are we watching Y/N?”

Taehyung made himself comfortable in your bed, leaning against the white wall. He pat the spot next to him so that you would sit down. You awkwardly did as he asked and Taehyung  took that opportunity to wrap you in the weighted blanket. You felt your body relax almost instantly. He kept his arm around your shoulders, he gave Seokjin a pointed look.

“You feel better right?”

“Better?” Seokjin asked, looking at you as if he just realized you had grown a second head.

“What happened?”

He sat on your other side and pushed Taehyung’s arm off of your shoulders. He twisted you so that you were looking at him. He looked concerned.

“I’m alright Seokjin,” you said with a shrug.

“She’s scared of thunder, hyung. She was having a hard time a little bit ago. Luckily, I noticed and helped her out. Right Y/N?”

“Scared of… Y/N is that true?”

You couldn’t bear the pity in Seokjin’s eyes. You shook your head.

“Can we not talk about it please?”

“Whatever make you the most comfortable Y/n,” Taehyung said pulling you so that your back was against his chest. You widened your eyes at Jin and tried to sit up but Taehyung held you protectively against his chest.

“If you want to talk about it, let me know okay,” Seokjin said, his voice soft. You nodded, trying again without success to pull away from Taehyung.

“So,” Seokjin said, clearly trying to ignore the way that Taehyung seemed to be marking his territory, “What movie should we watch first?”

It was hours later, when the sun had begun to set that you had fallen asleep. Taehyung had your head on his shoulder and Seokjin was stroking your legs comfortingly. Neither men said a thing as the third movie you were watching slowly came to a close. The closing credits began to roll. An old 80’s song played in the background.

It was only when it was completely silent and almost completely dark that Seokjin decided to speak.

“Taehyung-ah, I really think that we should have a conversation about this situation. Like adults.”

Taehyung sighed. The last thing he wanted to do was talk to one of his rivals but your weight, along with the weight of his blanket were pinning him to the spot. He didn’t have a choice.

“What is it hyung?”

Seokjin sighed. It was a couple of seconds before he spoke again.

“It’s clear that we both have taken a liking to Y/N. We don’t have to be petty about all of this. At the end of the day, Y/N is going to be the one to choose who she wants. On top of that, it’s clear that Jungkook also harbors some feelings for her. I think we can all agree that we don’t want to make things difficult for her.”

“Right… so what are you suggesting? We don’t pursue her?”

“Of course not!” Jin whispered.

“Let’s just do our best to not make her feel bad for whomever she chooses.”

“Oh,” said Taehyung, not sure what to say.

“Yeah…well, it’s getting to be dark and it looks like she had a hard day. We should leave her to rest don’t you think?”

Taehyung felt the bed dip and then in the darkness he saw the outline of his hyung. He didn’t want to leave, but at the same time, he didn’t want to stay the night if you hadn’t expressed he could.

“You’re right hyung. You go ahead. I’ll be out in a bit.”

“Sounds sketchy… but I’m going to trust you Kim Taehyung. Have a good night.”

“You too hyung.”

And he left. Taehyung sighed. It had been a really trying day for everyone involved. As you breathed deeply, he felt you sigh and cuddle into him further. He melted. His resolve to leave was almost dashed but then he thought of your reaction of the next morning and he knew he must leave.

With careful movements, he maneuvered you onto the pillow. You groaned at the level change but cuddled into his blanket further. In the nearly perfect darkness, he could barely make out a small smile on your lips. Your breathing even and calm. A complete one eighty from earlier that day. He wanted to be the reason for that smile. He prayed he was the reason.

A smile of his own made its way onto his lips. He hadn’t felt so at peace in a while. He made to leave but with a second thought, he leaned down and planted a soft kiss to your forehead. You sighed happily. A blush covered his cheeks.

“Please,” he whispered into your ear, knowing you wouldn’t actually hear him but hoping you might dream of him if you heard his voice, “pick me.”

After a couple of seconds, he straightened and walked towards the door. He reached for the doorknob, satisfied with the day when he heard you moan in your sleep. He froze, wondering if he’d woken you.

Another soft moan, softer than the last but this time it sounded like a word. He waited, in case you said something again.

“Okay,” you groaned followed by soft snores. And Taehyung couldn’t stop smiling.

Taglist: @embrace-themagic​ @monvieesdaebak