#Would he fucking say it
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Ajajdkfk is it cringe because the situation in essence is cringe or is it cringe because I’m the one who wrote it
#Personal#Amuel reads WBTL#Yes I’m now gonna tag this kind of posts#Just askjfkfk#They all are so oblivious and want Gabe to play olaball too much :’D#When your father is an outstanding olaball player how is it possible to dream of anything else#HELLO????#Would he fucking say it#I don’t know :’D#But no guys you don’t understand I’m legit facepalming when I read it XD#And I don’t understand whether it’s because it’s written cringy and I’m a bad writer#or it’s because the situation is crazy and I would react the same if it happened in the show :’D#Anyway I’m having a good time and it’s all that matters akhmkhk#Who needs writing new chapters when I can edit old chapters 👍🏻
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Do you ever write a sentence and then realize “Nah, that’s too self aware for you” and backspace a bunch of times.
#because I do#like a ‘he would not fucking say that’ but just about like#narration details#writing#writing problems#writer problems
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if parks and rec was still being made they’d do a bit where ron swanson has to wear a pronouns name tag and it’d just be “???/???” And it’d cut to a talking head of him going
“I’ve been a fool all this time. It’s bad enough the government knows my name, but now they want to know my gender? So I’m not letting them know my preferred pronouns. As far as I’m concerned, no one in this building should refer to me at all.”
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#meme#if you dont understand this you probably have really boring shitty sex#not sorry#oml one of my stupid vanilla friends is arguing with me about this#he says because top and dom usually coexist means theyre basicslly synonymous#no#hes dumb and if he didnt live in canada id punch him#thank god i never fucked this guy it would be so boring
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He Would Express Those Sentiments, But Not In That Vocabulary
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I remember discussing Tintin casting choices with a friend from Germany and remarked how it was odd he often has an English accent in adaptations rather than a Belgian one, and my friend just replied "that's because Tintin gives incredibly strong English boy energy (derogatory)"
Here in the UK there's a lot of weird classism tied into accents. Today accent diversity and representation in broadcasting is actively pursued but in Tintin's time there certainly was a preferred accent to have.
imagine this exchange happens between pages 28-29 in The Crab with the Golden Claws
#tintin#adventures of tintin#comic#captain haddock#archibald haddock#snowy#milou#fanart#the crab with the golden claws#i remember tintin crafting a trumpet to communicate with an elephant#and he remarks he must get the accent correct#very odd scenario but it shows he would be a stickler for that sort of thing#i also have to say accents do not indicate how smart someone is#a lot of pundits use an english accent to sound more credible#but i have to say there are a lot of fucking idiots here#me included#thank you 2011 film for validating my scottish haddock headcanon#any french speakers who have read to this point i wonder what your hcs are for his french speaking accent
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scenario in which bill stops torturing him and takes the time to explain what the portal is in terms more detailed than "this will get you the nobel prize for sure" and "im going to destroy your dimension, dipshit"
#gravity falls#billford#bill cipher#stanford pines#'but... no... thats not possible. you can't like my portal because that would mean... i fumbled'#'anyways thats the hottest thing youve ever said to me do you want to make out' 'no im still MAD at you'#you fucked up bill you FUCKED UP#though to be fair fords hands arent clean in this matter either he should have asked. so trusting. too trusting#i say to be fair. he should not have had to ask for more information lmao#m.png
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i lowkey forget that percy's full name is perseus. and like. that name goes so hard. because it just sounds like this mf could kick your ass. like imagine you're a junior in high school and your teacher introduces a new student by the name of 'perseus jackson'. and before you even raise your head to look at the guy. you just know this mf could clock you.
#yeah sally definitely knew this too#sally 'i named my son perseus so he could have a happy ending' jackson#AND so ppl would know not to fuck with him just by hearing his name#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo text post#pjo#pjo headcanon#percy jackson#perseus jackson#goddddddd say his nameeeeee
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the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.
#i can't believe i'm saying this#DEADPOOL CAN GET IT#Logan I'm sobbing I understand why you lunged at him#I would too bestie#it's the sass for me folks#paint that car white as much as they painted it red my god#a deadpool thirst post? from me? more likely than you'd think#this is a branch in realities i know it#i've never had Feelings for this motherfucker until this movie#all i'm left with is anger now because WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM ME#camera crew could have just made it landscape but noooooo they had to do a medium shot of this son of a bitch#i'm sending an especially affectionate fuck you in ryan reynolds' direction#i love how you love deadpool#deadpool#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#poolverine#deadclaws#don't get me wrong i've always adored deadpool's personality. nobody's that hilarious and not have humongous balls i mean trauma.#but i've never went 'why he kinda' until this specific shot right here#@ camera crew why the fuck did you zoom in? WHY?#for me? well it's infuriating#do it again#gif is credit to the owner#30 tags aren't enough for me to dismantle how this shot made me feel. tumblr you gotta update#damn tumblr i'm tryna feed a village here#guys just find my other post
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The Dellamortes
#Rook being denied her stupid ass pointy Tevinter mage shoes made her almost leave him at the alter#something something rook you know nothing about fashion leave this to the antivans#but also she would’ve had 0 interest in planning it I know her ass showed up to her own wedding like a modern groom does#just shows up 0 input#the wedding portrait is FINALLYYYY here#when I tell u I redesigned rooks dress 1000 times#I was fighting with making it Tevinter styled because she’s a Mercar rook but then I was like no no she’s marrying into a crow family those#mf’s would GLUE feathers to her if they could#also do love the idea of them both being like do we have to wear white I don’t think anyone is thinkin the god killers r pure pious virgins#of course you have to wear white I SAID SO DAMNIT#dragon age veilguard#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age#rookanis#lucanis x rook#datv#rook#lucanis dragon age#rook mercar#rook dragon age#I was tryna keep it ‘humble’ cause chantry but also the antivans….. do not do humble#also I wonder if Rook Mercar saw a woman leading the chant and was like w hat the fuck#cause imperial chantry#also the idea that illario was at the wedding??? I know my rook was PISSSED#also so funny to think lucanis was desperate to leave his own wedding because p arty ugh#I know this is so much yapping but I just have so many feelings about their wedding lol#Vivienne Rook Mercar#well Vivienne Rook DELLAMORTE NOW BOYS AM I RIGHT HAHAHA#I just know lucanis would’ve heard the chantry mother say ‘do you Vivienne take this man’ and he would’ve been like#who the fuck is Vivienne
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The realest part of the Barbie Movie was when Barbie was like "okay but what if this hurts his feelings? what if this makes him sad? :(" after Ken stole her house, stole her car, and stole her agency, because as a woman you still have to second guess everything you do on the assessment of whether it might hurt a man's feelings.
And then that apprehension was proven right one million times over by the entire Conservative Internet Manosphere pissing and shitting and screaming themselves hoarse over Barbie daring to hurt a man's feelings.
#barbie#barbie movie#also if the genders were reversed and Ken's character was a woman everyone would fucking _hate_ her im just saying#'petty bratty bitchy girlfriend wants to steal everything her boyfriend owns because she learned about feminism'#everyone would HATE her#but because Ken's a man everyones pissing frothing review is about how shittily he was treated and how shitty the men are treated blah blah#(I fucking loved Ken in the movie but I'm saying this with confidence: Everyone would hate female!Ken if this was reversed)
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Given how Miracle City is, wouldn't Manny look at the hero/villain dynamic, age difference, and similar powers, and just assume that Vlad is Danny's dad. The longer until Manny asks about it, the funnier it'd get.
HE WOULD. It's also funnier considering that's the most devastating thing you could say to Danny I think. Like if it wasn't Manny who's saying it he would've been so offended he'd launch him into space
The topic was never brought up at all (Vlad isn't an active threat nowadays and Manny only knew him because of past recollections from Danny and the others) so I can imagine Manny just sat with that assumption until one day he gets to visit Danny's parents' house and makes some offhand remark about his dad. Danny gets confused and asks what he means
Manny says smth like "are we supposed to be careful around him or is he retired now"
Danny: who do you think my dad is
Manny: is Vlad not your dad?
Danny:
#asks#dewdles#tigerghost#i guess#anon#danny (internally): WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU THINK THAT !!!!!!!!!!!#what he says out loud: no he is not my father. dont be silly :)
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The most out of character here is the fact that Jonathan is not a dickhead and can flirt (lets not talk about t-shirt, everyone can be young and make mistakes)
#college/uni au#OKAY GUYS I KNOW THIS IS ONE OF THE HE WOULD NEVER FUCKING SAY THIS SERIES but MY uni lige has gotten me and i need a comf uni AU#im tired of studing so idnt even have strength to color this and have a bunch of unfinished skethes#so it is what it is#the magnus archives#tma fanart#tma podcast#jonathan sims#tma#martin blackwood#jmart#tw: jon in t-shirt
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you know, you know. no gods, no masters, no kings on pedestals. everyone is fallible. death of the author. you know! you are balanced about your intake of media - you allow the wiggle room, the grace, the gratitude, the skepticism. nobody above criticism.
but still. a weird gut-punch feeling, something akin to betrayal. you read the article. surprise! an author you love is actually: a serial fucking predator.
well, shit. what now. no, you knew he was a person (all people are), but now you're wondering - what have i overlooked by accident? what messages have i internalized that are strange and cruel? and also, like, what the fuck?
his actions lay a thick glaze on top of everything. like each place is now ruined, opaque in a new way. but okay, fine, you've done this before. you knew better, right? you've been betrayed by many a cherished childhood author.
still, this stickiness. fuck. can you pick up that book again. will you read it to your children. you've recommended it to others - will you ever do that again? and of course, of course, no parasocial relationships. you were theoretically above this kind of sentiment. but the artist informs the art, right.
so it's not something as clear-cut as feeling he owed you, specifically (a stranger) better behavior - just that you kind of, in a distant and odd way... sort of trusted him to do better. it's not like a real trust or something speakable, just the faint hope that the product (good books) was a thin representation of the soul. now it feels like the product (good? books?) was a mask. in some small or insignificant way, your previous support of this person lent them power. your money and your time and your laughter.
and the thing is - you have this terrible, echoing sensation. how many times will this happen? over and over. you find out that the singer you love is actually a predator. you learn over drinks that your favorite high school english teacher is in jail for what he did to her. you listen to the news idly and suddenly discover that a woman you used to idolize has been abusing her kids for an actual eon.
what can you touch without the static melting off. you can't even really complain about it too much (you were supposed to know better, and besides, you don't want the same re-split "it's not your fault, love what you love" basic advice), but now it's here. somehow, it feels like - you let him into your life.
it's not that things need to be pure or an artist has to be like, endlessly perfect, mindful. demure. it's more just this terrible truth that has been replayed through your veins so often it feels criminally vain. power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. did you want any one person to be worth that power?
it's just that he wrote books where he seemed to understand that. he seemed to know about hierarchies and unfair systems and bigotry and privilege. you thought they were books about what it means to struggle. you thought they were about having power and still using it for good rather than for control. he spooned you a narrative of being a good guy, a kind soul. you fucking bought what that fucking monster sold.
maybe that's why they were fantasies, after all.
#spilled ink#warm up#oh im .... sick to my stomach.#i talked to him. like ....... we talked. that man interacted with my poetry and writing.#that article.... gutwrenching. i am so sorry to everyone he's ever even been in the room with.#i feel.... like... unbearably. sick.#he acted like he was cool and friends with me!! we were cool internet writers together!!!!!#i feel sick for even having been polite to him.#i ...... am experiencing something so fucking complicated.#i wonder how many of u are feeling that too. like ''oh i sent him an ask and he was funny and sweet''#THATS HOW THEY GET U. ..... and YES I KNOW!!!#i am so fucking well-read about parasocial relationships. it would just be nice to like. trust that someone ISNT#hiding a huge fucking background of BEING A COMPLETE MONSTER. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK.#by the way i am not part of a fandom. this is “what the fuck i accidentally supported a rapist” not#“but my showww”. like i care far more about like. the human cost.#but also like... people are people. idk i saw a take on here about how nobody should mourn the books#and idk. people almost always reply to any scenario with their personal experience first -#''i knew him'' or ''wow i was just at that store'' or ''i grew up there'' or whatever. because that is how we establish connection &#emotional weight. that's just... a person thing. and there is a difference between 'oh this guy is a monster'' & the feeling of:#he's been a monster and i SUPPORTED THAT. i CELEBRATED him. i !!! a fucking victim myself!!!!!!!!! SUPPORTED . HIM.#i am sick. i feel so much pain for her and everyone he's ever hurt. saying ''the books are ruined'' is i think ... like how people say#they're shocked and disgusted by him. (obviously there's nuance here. im sure there's some creep doin it wrong. but u know. in general)#idk..... im an author. i understand my work is in your life in whatever small way. i understand that connection. it's real.
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Dick: on the one hand, I would give anything to hear my mother’s voice again
Dick: on the other hand, not being able to remember helps me avoid certain types of psychological warfare
*sounds of yelling in the background as Damian mimicries Janet Drake*
#leo says shit#batfam#damian wayne#dick grayson#tim drake#damian when he finds an old interview of the drakes: you know what would be fucking funny
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Not sure how I genuinely feel about this pairing but. I think that despite having 1 canon interaction this could be the funniest dm pairing
#hoof draws#not much else to say ig#he would stress senshi out so bad i think...#it's also like. most of the people senshi tries to take care of he at least *thinks* are kids#but mithrun is 70 years older than him so it's like fuck.#how are you older than me and still living this unhealthily
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