#With that last paragraph I'm sure you might know what I'm referring to

[stellafrin]

You're super sweet and your blog is great! 🫶

Have a good rest of your day!

Hello there JJ, one of my hornier mutuals

Thank you, I hope you're havin' a good day too

With the timing I'm guessing this in reply to the #'s I added to the top 10 post so I thought I'd add a little more, jumping off both my tags and tangentially related to a thing mentioned in the post itself.

This might be a disjointed mess if I don't figure out how to make it flow tomorrow

Since following you I've definition learned to be more open and patient with people and more open to some things in media.

In the past when I've seen someone proclaiming how they like "problematic media" in their header or bio they've almost always turned out to be the worst kind of fan. Going out of their way to harasse people because they're uncomfortable with certain topics in media, throwing around slurs, and just being all around assholes.

But you havn't, not only have you just been a decent person from what I've seen, you've also written/shared some really good thematic and literary analysis on these anime/manga I would probably have just avoided at all costs (and in some cases had already been avoiding.)

I've always had this insatiable need to know, to understand.

When I'm confused by something, I want to know more about it so I can atleast understand on a basic level and be able to make a (semi)informed decision on it.

But despite saying this, for the longest time there were still many things I'd basically completely written off, decided I'd never dig into. Which is honestly a bit hypocritical?

I mean, there's this YouTuber I used to watch consistently called NyxFears (I havn't watched her videos in like 3 years, hell I havn't really watched anything on YouTube consistently in over a year, streams and driving have just taken up so much time)

At the time I'd been keeping up she'd cover weird, grotesque, and violent films and remembering back to that all I can think is.

How is the horny worse?

They're both fictional, I know this. Media can give you different view points to see the world from and thus alter the way you see it, it's important to stay aware of this and know that it's fiction, and I am.

Why's the horny worse than the violent?

(Hell some of the films she covered were horry as hell in the weirdest fucking ways too but *waves hand* ignore that)

This is just a dumb realization I've been having every once in a while since I started following.

But yeah, seeing the thoughtful analysis (amidst the torrent of boobs and horny posts) on these anime/manga I'd usually avoid has been interesting.

I'll accepting that the character in this show is infact incredibly fucking trans but the age of these characters with how horny it gets + the incest squigs me the fuck out so I'm still not gonna watch/read it.

Finally, thank you so much for being so on point with tagging basically every anime/manga you reblog consistently. It makes it so easy to mute or look up something whenever I want to see less or more of it.

I've muted a handful of tags for media that makes me uncomfortable, but I've also found some that I actually enjoy, thanks.

...

Uh...

✨️✨️✨️how do you end a post✨️✨️✨️

[sage-is-in-fact-very-tired]

so like . maybe opening a Google doc for this is a bit much however (future sage after they finished, it was not. it was not a bit much) . consider . who cares

the paragraph analysis (that isn't 2k words) - morally grey, maybe leaning more villain, some vague concepts of like- power? (of the magic kind?), probably was part of a group / company and isn't anymore . also like . getting vague toxic ex vibes from at least two of those songs.

anyway. I've gotten very good at analyzing songs as we all know. and so - a short little analysis based on nothing but the vibes of those songs <3

-> [Bones]

-> giving very morally grey kinda vibes? something about like- “I'll take the long road home that's lined with blood and snow” have they killed people? maybe their past involves some kind of death? the whole thing of innocent but they'll still serve time, maybe they're being blamed for some kind of death? The line about being your own worst enemy - do they blame *themself* for something that happened? do they think they're a bad person and keep going on anyway? Also that first like “can you believe in something that you can't even see? Can you agree we're part of something bigger than you and me?” Very ‘part of a suspicious group” kinda vibes, especially with the other lines about blood and innocence. “The mirror's always showing me a shell of who I used to be” maybe they used to be a better person than what they are now? (Looks at Little Wolf. looks at Little Wolf so hard)

-> vaguely kinda . toxic (or more than just toxic) ex vibes if you look at it in the right lens . like the lines about “you can give and take” and “Crack my bones but my heart won't break” like. yeah

-> [AC/DC]

-> this one is giving me . a time . because okay the main thought is of course like- robot. or some kind of mechanical parts, connected somehow to something like that?

-> if we go robot route, you have the obvious of like- morally grey robot being used by slightly evil group / company to do their dirty work, but in combination with all of the other songs I'm not quite sure that really fits completely?

-> could actually be more *the group / company* talking to starbound!sherb as opposed to starbound!sherb themself, which in context to the other songs I feel might be a bit more likely? honestly this song is the most confusing one to me-

-> [Rats]

-> something about how the group they work for is a little evil and they're all kind of rats and rats aren't considered good or clean or anything (something about having blood on their hands?) “Guess he's only got himself to blame” Something about how they've done bad things but (they believe) it's kinda their fault because they kept doing it without any question

-> and the other thing . toxic ex vibes . just very toxic relationship vibes . something about “love me like the rats in the cupboard” but like they wouldn't be loved because no one *wants* rats in their cupboard. the “watch me me burn and feed the flames” something about a possible partner (or I guess this could be like- okay I have brain worms and they definitely *were* apart of some kind of group so this could be referring to that but . lemme have my fun <3 - and this doesn't feel like the kinda song sherb would pick if thats the case? soooooo /silly) letting them wear themself down and feed the fire of why they're not a good person? “Do you ever get sick of watching me cave in” like ??? okay now . something about getting close to someone and then just . They don't help you and just watch you from afar. mmm. “Pull me apart and spreed me thin” do I need to elaborate . like. same reason as the last one- “told me she was back and here to stay, said she loved me and she wants my money, well I told her not today” very like- maybe controlling past partner maybe? this whole song gives very toxic relationship vibes and I dunno how else you want me to say that- “love me like the rats in the cupboard, not enough to keep a dying flame” something something starbound!sherb finally walking away from this? finally going off and trying to distance themself from this person?

-> half vaguely coherent thought of maybe like- them leaving the possible group they could've been apart of and like- getting into a relationship that isn't healthy in the slightest bc they haven't been able to process and the other side is just toxic? you know? shrug

-> [Sinners]

-> very just . morally grey vibes. not like lyric wise just like Vibe wise you must listen to it to understand I feel. “I must be good for something” so they want to be useful huh? is that a thing they wanna do? hm? /silly “oh Sinners come down, come gather round” something about maybe formerly being in a group - maybe being in some sort of higher up position? who knows, not me, clearly. “Let's go have some fun before they put us in the ground” so there's people after their group or just them perhaps? (with the addition of leave me alone later on the playlist, this is highly likely that *someone* is after them) “lions sit in solemn lines, drinking gin and dropping lines” something about whatever they do being very like- controlling? (could tie back to AC/DC maybe?) like them being on a tight ship perhaps? there's a lot of repeating lyrics in this one so there's not too much for me to look at with my eyes :(

-> [Little Wolf]

-> so this is the outlier of the group it'd seem . and . okay I've been brain worms about this one. because there's like- two ways yoou can see this one. also they're for sure not Athena I hope we can agree on that-

-> so option number one that- I think makes the most sense, is that in the context of this song they'd be antinuous. Kinda of more of that “morally grey, leaning a bit more ‘villain’” kinda vibes they got going? Just very antagonistic and stuff like that? (To who is another question but we probably can't get that just from the playlist)

-> other option is they're telemachus - a younger version of them only hoping to be a good person (perhaps joining a group in hopes they'd be able to help out with space horrors?), being taken under the wing of someone older and willing to protect them. (something about how arguably, under this interpretation, they could very easily be *both* telemachus and antinuous, trying to be good at the beginning and only ending up a worse person despite. Perhaps this is some kind of internal dialog, who knows. it's funky thinking about what's up with them)

-> [Dark Science]

-> This is the part I get the vague power vibes from? it just has that vibes and I can't explain it more than that-

-> actually on second thought it could also just be like- the group they were / could've been a part of? like something about their leader or a recruiter talking to starbound!sherb? and or star!sherb talking to like- a victim, but I lean more to the first option? something about the pre-chorus “Of your cold heart, no spark Restarting your true dark With mismatched animal parts Cannibal starved, natural Death is just the start” Feels very like- trying to convince them that it's gonna be fine and whatever they're going to do to star!sherb will all be fine (maybe they're like- cyborg? or along this song maybe some funky alien things? which could maybe also add to the powers idea that I've slightly squashed) and the chorus telling someone to not be afraid feels very “someone trying to convince someone else this group / these people are good and this is completely normal and ethical :)” also this - “With every draw I paint a picture Perfect murder scene But if these mortuary walls could talk We both know that they’d scream Hindsight is the only judge and jury that I need” feels very like- their story has *something* to do with death of some kind, be that literal or like- something else I'm not sure we can figure out. also the bridge talks about control and being a “cog” and. yeah I think their story perhaps also has something to do with control . I feel like those are the two major vibes I get. (Add the toxic ex idea to that? mmmmmm)

-> [Cavalryman]

-> something about being a soldier something about doing people's dirty work something about being apart of a slightly evil group something something. I don't have big brain worms about this song its just very big vibes honestly. also a lot of stuff about death yet again? like I feel like this could perhaps be a big part of their story… just guessing here though who knows… /silly

-> [Do What I Gotta]

-> morally grey bitch <3 /pos - also, seems like they might be on their own now perhaps? not apart of a group anymore - something like they left it for something better? (being morally grey still <3) anyway. “This city got issues lucky for us though I'm a one man armada” something about them trying to fix everything on their own (points back to that idea in Sinners of “I must be good for something” perhaps?) “I'm a bottle half full cause I got a good feeling that this world will truly start healing long as I do my part and keep a head start” very funky vibes going on here - seems a but more optimistic than the previous songs seemed? maybe they're trying to change their ways (albeit still in a definitely morally grey kinda way) or something like that so they can reverse any harm they could've done? “Imma do what's best if I get knocked down i'll start from the bottom” something about how they're willing to start all over if they get knocked off wherever they are? thyre *willing* to start over and still climb their way back up to the top. and then the . “count your days, I don't care what city you stay, I don't care what path you walk, the fact that you walks enough to get slain” Oh so like they're definitely killing people . so like regardless of what they did before they're probably definitely killing people still- “”we are your friends, we're in your crew, we are like you,” or that what they say” so maybe they're killing the people they used to associate with question mark? “Your choice is easy just pick a side but pick the wrong one and you'll probably die” funky funky funky for sure guys . normal

-> [Leave Me Alone]

-> puts my fingers together . toxic ex makes an appearance perhaps . I dunno something about this song in combination with Rats (and also Bones a little) is giving very toxic ex vibes and also probably like- their past group too but. lemme toxic ex truth here for a little bit please <3 “you took the money but the money couldn't buy a friend” points, there was a reference to money in rats and it was In a very oh this person wants this but I won't give it to them and this also maybe has that kinda vibes. also the whole just . leave me alone idea . toxic maybe kinda controlling vibes from rats and bones - it's not a *long* stretch to assume they might be after star!sherb? “The devil that you is better than the devil that you don't” perhaps like- maybe star!sherb not wanting to hurt whoever after them despite everything (the devil they know being the person after them, and the devil they don't being star!sherb? something about how star!sherb definitely is like . okay with murder-) “go fly a kite until your tangled in the hanging tree” Well that's a way to tell someone to kill themself- okay no for real something about how maybe in this case star!sherb doesn't want to get their hands dirty? and they want someone else, or even the person after them, to do it themself as opposed to otherwise (if we go toxic ex situation, something about still feeling things for them despite everything?)

uhhhhhhhh, I think that's all. word count on all of that is like two thousand words . thought that'd be shorter guess I'm just too much of a loser for that. anyway I have brainworms about starbound!sherb I hope that's clear 🧍‍♂️

[ineffable-suffering]

The Jane Austen Ball and why it was never about Nina and Maggie

Otherwise known as (*takes a deep breath*): A completely inflated close-up look at various dialogues and events of Season 2 that prove that the Whickber Street Traders and Shopkeeper's Association Meeting Cotillion Ball was supposed to be Aziraphale's confession to Crowley

Look, the point's been made before but that's never kept me from making it myself again, still. In fact, even I made it before, at the end of one of my other metas. But I feel like it's absolutely worthy enough to get its own soppy, way-too-long post. And I do love it so very much to write ridiculously long essays on something that could easily be condensed into a short paragraph.

So, here we go! Snuggle up, get cozy, settle in and, most importantly:

(Word count: 3.177 | Reading time: ~13 minutes)

As I already said above, I laid out a similar case in my meta about why Aziraphale is somewhat of an unreliable narrator. I'll try and recycle it here briefly, so I can further make my point.

When Aziraphale arrives back in London from his Edinburgh journey, he seems oddly happy and giddy for the fact that he just had a rather odd and threatening encounter with Shax. I explain in my other meta that this is because he just spent the last hours of his drive reminiscing on the thrilling and romantic magic show adventure of 1941 and also the fact that he just found out that Crowley has been replaced by Shax and no longer works for Hell.

Ergo: We have a hopelessly lovesick Principality at our hands, who's practically swooning over his serpent who saved him, his books and his magic show all those years ago.

Ergo:

✨This✨

Realistically, Aziraphale should probably be a tad worried about the eery encounter with Shax, in which she definitely had the upper hand on him. But well, if you spend many-a hours driving across the serene countryside (Edinburgh is about an 8-hour drive from London), pondering on one of the craziest, sticky-sweet romantic adventures of your not-life life, well ... things tend to turn a little rosy around the edges. Head in the clouds and all that. Light shades of grey!

Alright, onwards: Once the angel, filled to the very brim with fond memories and butterflies, gets out of the Bentley, he's kindly met with a face full of verdant plants and a very in-character-grumpy Crowley.

Fhwack! Way to burst the rosy bubble.

Seriously, the absolute lightning speed with which Crowley storms out to vacate the bookshop the very second Aziraphale arrives makes me giggle every time.

Let's make a first small (who am I kidding) diversion into analysing the following conversation in unnecessary detail ...

... simply because I enjoy quoting dialogue as an accurate reference in my metas. I'll also highlight certain passages I want to comment on in individual colours so I can back up my thoughts with them below. Alright, their little chinwag goes as follows:

Crowley: "They you are! I was worried something might have happened to you." Aziraphale: "No, nothing happened to me. Very uneventful journey indeed. No strange things at all." Crowley: "Good. That's what we wanna hear." Aziraphale: "Um .. everything okay with- ah.." *nods to the bookshop* Crowley: "Oh, yeah, fine. He's singing to himself. I think he must have been asleep. I heard snoring coming from his bedroom–" Crowley, to the Bentley: "Did you miss me? I bet you did." Aziraphale: "... I'm sure it did." Crowley: "So, any more clues from the mystery of the missing archangel?" Aziraphale: "Not exactly. Or, if there are, I haven't yet cracked the case. But I'm certainly hot on the trail of something." Crowley: "I'm sure you are. Oh, by the way, the whole sudden rain and awning thing was a complete washout." Aziraphale: "Sorry?" Crowley: "You know, project making Nina fall in love with Maggie. I failed, it's your go." Aziraphale: "I see. Well then, Whickber Street Traders and Shopkeeper's Association Monthly Meeting, here we come!" Crowley: "You're really hosting the meeting?" Aziraphale: "Absolutely! And I can guarantee you, it will be a night to remember."

At first glance, this has little to do with the plot of this meta but actually, it folds into my point very nicely! However, it's not time for that yet, so we'll just state the facts as they are for now and then bring them back 'round later when we need them. That being said: For the love of Someone, will these two ever manage to simply tell each other the truth of what happened instead of thinking they can protect each other by lying about it all the time? Hrmpf. As a big fan of open communication myself, I'm close to developing a stomach ulcer with the amount of false truths being spewed here. (Then again – and yes, that is another, way larger meta I'm currently cooking up – it plays so very perfectly into the whole Jane-Austen-Pride-and-Prejudice tragic miscommunication theme that this entire Season has, so I understand the point of it.)

Very uneventful journey indeed, Aziraphale, except for the fact that you were ambushed by a demon who told you she was Crowley's successor, knows about the rumors of the two of you being an item as well as what went down in 1941 (that almost had both of you exposed) and also seems to have figured out where you and your demon boyfriend are hiding Gabriel, all in the span of about a minute. No strange things at all, nooo!

And Crowley's "Oh yeah, fine" is a total lie too. Again, we see him make an absolute run for it before Aziraphale can even enter the bookshop. After all, he just once again witnessed Jim have a Gabriel-flashback, speaking of the Second Coming, while Crowley was alone with him. As fumingly angry he is with the amnesiac archangel – he's also absolutely terrified of what might happen (to him and Aziraphale) should Jim regain his memories. So, no wonder he's quick to vacate the premises after witnessing Jim's rather eery memory flashback (and was, just like Aziraphale, threatened by Shax mere moments later, lol).

But no, nothing out of the ordinary happened to either of them. Tip-top. Absolutely tickety-fucking-boo.

Alright, let's get back on track with the actual topic of this meta. Certainly hot on the trail of something, hm? At first glance, it might seem like Aziraphale is talking about the fact that Gabriel was in company of someone whenever he went to the Resurrectionist Pub. (The clue!) However, I don't actually think he is talking about that. Why? Because, and this slipped my mind too at first, he never actually follows any of this information up, does he? Yes, sure, he went to Edinburgh, found the capital-c Clue and then returned to London. But what does he do with it? Nothing. He doesn't keep investigating this hot trail because that's not the important thing he realized during his journey. No, the more important clue Aziraphale found during his trip, is that Crowley no longer works for Hell and that he is also very much irrevocably in love with him and must confess this at the earliest given chance. (The latter part isn't necessarily a new discovery for Aziraphale, but it surely is fuelled by the fact that he just realized Crowley's out of a Hellish job and simply hasn't told him yet.)

This exchange just the perfect indicator for the fact that Aziraphale, at no point during his drive back, was thinking about the Maggie and Nina mission. He has no idea what Crowley is talking about once he mentions it and seems surprised, even, that he would. Even though they just talked about it on the phone when Aziraphale was still at the graveyard. Which is another important piece of evidence because it means that the last status update Aziraphale got of Mission Lovebirds, was that Crowley had sensed an opportunity to make them fall in love – and had then hung up on him. Why is this important? Because it means that until that very point of their conversation, Aziraphale did not know that Crowley's attempt had failed! There would have been just as much of a chance of Crowley's weather miracle actually working out and Maggie and Nina already having skipped into the sunset happily ever after.

So, riddle me this:

Why would Aziraphale spend the entire ride back from Edinburgh plotting "a night to remember" (because clearly, he already had the entire Ball planned out down to a T in his head since he goes into action right away after arriving) if he didn't even know yet that Crowley's attempt had failed?

To be very clear here: We're not talking about Aziraphale driving on the M1 to London, having a silly little idea for putting on some good music, miracle-ing Nina and Maggie to dance to it and watch them confess their love–

No.

He planned an entire actual Cotillion Ball with very particular location design that involves re-arranging the entire bookshop, specifically designed individual outfits for (almost) every single attendee, topped off with a live band, hors-d'œuvre, drinks and an actual choreographed group dance.

During one car ride.

Where's the party planner Aziraphale AU? I'm waiting!

Now, sure, we know that it's still quite important for Aziraphale to convince Heaven of the faux-reason they gave for their accidental ✨25-Lazarii miracle✨. But if we're all honest, this all seems to be a tad much just to make two random humans fall in love, even for that.

Glittery ball gowns and suits? Red and gold wall curtains? A modified language filter? Bloody vol-au-vents?

Talk about over the top ...

Once we start S2E5, Crowley is still surprised at the mere fact that Aziraphale is actually planning to organize the Monthly Meeting – and he doesn't even know yet that it's gonna be the most extravagant ball-boogaloo that the Whickber Street Community has ever seen! Aziraphale wanting to organize the meeting alone, is enough to render Crowley incredulous, because Aziraphale never mingles with the other shopkeepers. He usually actively avoids them and any sort of social encounters as much as he can because he doesn't care about the bloody Christmas lights, alright?

These things seem mundane and uninteresting to him, obviously, since all he really cares about is hoarding his book collection in peace like the little hedonist he is and drawing as little attention as possible to his none-business business.

Oh, right, speaking of books:

Let's take another unnecessarily detailed look at the whole Whickber Street invitation scene:

Aziraphale realizes very quickly that he's not the only one who's quite unenthusiastic about the blessed Chritsmas lights. And despite his very persuasive methods of temptation ...

... he has to take some more drastic measurements. And those are?

That's right: Giving away his books.

I'll repeat it again, slowly: Aziraphale is willingly (!) giving away or lending his books to pretty much complete strangers to, allegedly, make two other humans strangers fall in love.

Seriously, who is that angel and what has he done with our prim, fussy, hedonistic Aziraphale that protects his books with the vice grip of an eagle carrying his precious prey?

Believe in the importance of Mission Lovebirds as much as you will, but we're talking about Mr. A.Z. Fell here who, over the past millennia, has pretty much spent every day actively working out methods to stop people from purchasing as much as a single paperback from his holy shelves.

And yet: the 1965 September Dr. Who Annual? Given away. The first edition of Expert at the Card Table that was S. W. Erdnase's personal copy? Lent away to grubby human hands to fondle around with.

Let's do another coloured dialogue diversion (don't worry, it's not as extensive as the last one):

Crowley: "You just did what I think you did?" Aziraphale: "I'm not prepared to talk about it." Crowley: "You gave away a book." Aziraphale: "I had to! Maggie and Nina are depending on me. They just don't know it yet."

Crowley backs up my point: This is a huge deal. Aziraphale does not sell his books – let alone give them away for free. We're all shocked! Flabbergasted!

And the explanation Crowley and us get just ... doesn't satisfy. Something and someone sure is depending on this Ball and doesn't know it yet. But it's most definitely not Maggie and Nina, folks.

You know for whom Aziraphale would give away his books in the blink of an eye, though?

Mhm, that's right.

This pretty old serpent.

I want to take a minute to show you the reaction again that Aziraphale has upon entering the very same magic shop him and Crowley went to in 1941 to acquire the Bullet Catch:

You ... you need a minute there, angel? You're sure looking a little ... affected.

And I mean, well, no wonder. He reminisced about that very memory four hours last night. To him, this shop is where the most turbulent, ecstatic, adrenaline-fuelled and romantic night of his life began. And it shows.

I've made my point in my other meta series about how Aziraphale is an incredibly nostalgic character. He romanticizes so many things in his memories – especially the parts that feature Crowley. So, it doesn't surprise me in the slightest that he's once again willing to loosen the tight grip he has on his book collection to get the successor of Will Goldstone's Magic Shop, the shop that started it all for him, to come to his fancy Ball.

As we watch Aziraphale and his little lap dog demon pat around Soho, I'd like to take another second to point out that he goes to seven or more establishments before he even invites Nina.

... and he only does so because she starts talking to them on the street. Almost like he'd forgotten about it. Why not ask her at the very beginning? To establish whether or not he'd have to book-blackmail her too?

"Perfectly ordinary invitation with no hidden agenda of any kind", except that he's using you and Maggie as a pretence to resolve his own clusterfuck of a relationship-miscommunication Jane-Austen-style so that he can then hopefully confess his undying love to his demon not-boyfriend boyfriend.

Marvellous!

You'll forgive me another short diversion but my God, the whole exchange at the Marguerite's restaurant with Crowley literally cat-call-whistling Aziraphale over to him (and Aziraphale checking if he meant someone else first, I–)? I am weak. So, so weak and

However, this is also when we get a snippet of Crowley finally revealing the truth in place of his "Oh, he's fine"-lie earlier and telling Aziraphale that he's actually pretty scared Jim might turn back into Gabriel and smite him altogether. And Aziraphale's response is, in a cosmic sense, (remember the pink paragraph now) so hilarious:

"Have you thought of just talking to him?"

Yeah, have you? Have any of the two of you? Just thought about talking? To each other? About anything?

'pparently not. But hey, it's all good because remember what the ultimate remedy for star-crossed lovers simply misunderstanding each other is?

Bish, bash, bosh, problem solved!

Back at the ballroom bookshop, Aziraphale sends Crowley to invite Maggie in order to, in my opinion, not spoil the Ball-y surprise for him. (Inviting Maggie only now?! Wouldn't she be one of the only two guests who really should attend? Why the short notice? If she's really that important for the Ball you're planning, hm?)

On top of this, we see Nina almost not attending the Ball meeting after her partner broke up with her and Crowley being the one who coincidentally runs into her and ushers her into the bookshop before Shax and her "legion" of demons start creeping up on them. Again, if this hadn't happened by pure coincidence, Nina would have left to go home and this whole Ball would have taken place without her, rendering the apparent sole purpose of making her fall in love with Maggie useless.

Why doesn't Aziraphale care more for both of them to attend and be there? Why is he instead busy fussing over everything looking perfect and wonderful and doesn't even seem to notice that both Nina and Maggie are really late to the meeting?

Well. Well.

The answer's in the title, babes.

Alas, Crowley safely gets Maggie and Nina to join them, Mr. Brown is the only one who doesn't get a miracled outfit (fussy, petty angel, you just don't like him, do you?), Jimbriel stuns with glamour and flirt (and whatever sexually suggestive thing he does with his cheeks) and the Whickber Street Ball is a-go!

Sorry, I just had to chuck this in again because Crowley's face here absolutely kills me every time. He looks so confused, I am hollering.

And the heart eyes Aziraphale is making at Nina and Maggie now that they're actually here?

Oh, bless it, angel.

He's all like "Oh look, it's working! Jane was right! It's all going to be resolved, all the misunderstanding and quarrels! Crowley, where's Crowley–"

Ah yes, there he is.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is an angel who is not listening to a single word being said right now. No, in his head, Aziraphale is already down on one knee, pouring his heart out to Crowley after they just danced the night away.

Oh, yes, right. The dancing.

Parallel much?

But well, as marvellous and beautifully romantic as her stories tend to be, it turns out that Jane Austen isn't always right after all. Because before we know it, the perfect night shatters into many-a tiny pieces (literally).

And once again, fhwack:

... the rosy bubble bursts.

Let's take one more deep breath so I can make my final point:

In S2E2, Aziraphale explains to us very exactly what Jane's Balls (hrhr) used to be about: Solving miscommunication and confessing love to one another.

During his car journey back from Edinburgh, Aziraphale:

doesn't know Crowley's Mission Lovebirds had failed

remembers 1941 and just how badly he's in love with Crowley

and also realizes that they seem to have been wildly miscommunicating for quite some time now. (Crowley didn't even tell him he basically got let go!)

So, what does maddeningly strong love plus a want to resolve all the miscommunication equal? That's right: A night to remember! A Ball to change it all! A dance, a vol-au-vent, a confession. And, ideally, a happy ever after. Because:

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man angel in possession of a good fortune Jane Austen collection, must be in want of a wife demon husband.”

The Ball was never for Nina and Maggie. As a byproduct, maybe, yes. But the whole rest of the glimmer and glamour, the careful, romantic planning and set up of it all, the book-bating the other shopkeepers– that was for Crowley and Crowley only.

And oh, if only it were as easy as in the books.

*whispers* I'm sorry, I had to.

***

Your honour, the tinfoil-hat crackpot defence rests. Feel free to share thoughts (and prayers) if you want to!

Au revoir! 💗

[kings-highway]

I apologise if this question has been asked before but- when did you get into writing and do you do it as a job? your writing is truly impeccable and I’d love to begin writing but I’m not very good lol

The true answer to this question is "as long as I can remember." I turned 25 just a few days ago, and would feel comfortable confidently saying I've been writing for 20 years. Not... Seriously of course, but some of my most early memories are of stapling paper together to make little books i wrote. I do remember, though, the actual moment in which I decided I wanted to write novels, and it was directly because my older brother had said he was going to write one. I was probably ten or eleven? Its hard to remember. I often credit him as being the reason I write, because I literally remember sitting down and starting a book that evening. He also taught me the rules for starting new paragraphs which I vehemently hated and swore I wouldnt bother doing ever but then immediately inputted into my work.

Alas, I do not get paid for writing. I am working on self publishing a novel of mine, but truthfully the publishing industry is so fucked up and so... Antithetical to things I (and I would bet on most writers) love about the craft. Did you know, that its industry standard to include 3-5 titles of published novels "similar to yours" in your cover letter to an agent to "prove you know the market/marketability of your book"? And most of the time they request you to only reference books published in the last 5 years. Basically codifying into their process that they're only ever gonna churn out copycats. Let me tell you this right now, i don't consider marketability for one goddamn second when I write. I write because it's who I am, it's like breathing for me, and I don't fucking know "similar recently published titles" because what real writer gives a shit about what anyone else is doing??? I'm writing MY stories, thank you. But evidently we're at that stage of society where publishing is just about money and if there's one thing thats true about me is that I would rather never make a dime off my writing than get sucked into a contract that forces me to churn out a YA series for mass market appeal.

Ahem. Uh. Rant over.

On that topic though I think I would greatly enjoy being an editor or working in the writing industry in other ways but I am probably never going to be a traditionally published author ✌️also I have no idea how to break into that industry and am terrible at networking so. Alas. i must fund myself other ways.

And you didn't ask for this, but you mentioned at the end of your ask that you want to begin writing but that you're not very good, and my true solemn genuine advice to that is to remind you that you have to be that way when you start. Like... Writing is something that you naturally improve over time. By reading and by physically writing, every time you do it, you get a little better. But there's no way to skip to the next level. So... You might not be great at writing. Im not gonna tell people "oh art is subjective im sure your writing is amazing" because the truth is, language is difficult and writing is a skill. And you have to practice it. But the moment you pick up a pen, you begin to improve. Before publishing any fanfiction online, I had completed five novel length stories, and the first one I ever completed sucked fucking ass. (Also I was 14 so... Sorry 14 year old me for saying your work sucks ass but it does) The fifth one was mediocre, not as embarassing. Im even proud of it. But the novel I'm trying to publish? The novel I wrote after committing a million words of fanfiction to the page over 3 years? That shit is good. Its well written. And those 3 years got me there because of constantly writing, because of the practice I put out. You HAVE to write your obligatory words of garbage before you get to write something great. Im so sorry about that. But if you love writing, and if you want to write, and if you have a story to tell, then there's no better time to start honing those skills. Every time you finish a work, the next one will start even better off. And I, personally, am so excited to see where I'll get to be in the next three years, because I'm sure it'll make my current works look mediocre.

I just don't want people to look at my work and think it's unachievable. I have those 2 decades of wanting this really badly. Of wanting to be this. But thats the only thing I have that you might not. Everything else you can learn. My skill is nothing but practice, and if you give yourself the time and space to learn the craft as well, there's absolutely nothing stopping you from being an absolutely phenomenal writer. But you do have to, you know, write.

[oceaneyesinla]

I started writing this in July, and the first few paragraphs have been sitting in my drafts for months. A bolt of inspiration hit me after a rough week, and here it is. It was so cathartic to put all of this into words, and I think it's turned out pretty great.

CW: suicidal ideation, discussion of death, heavy reference to depression - please proceed with caution if any of this affects you. This is pretty heavy, but there is a hopeful ending. Below a cut just in case

Anyone who can relate to this, I'm sorry, and I hope things get brighter for all of us

divider by @/cafekitsune

Sunrise

You're not sure long you've been up here. Long enough for the sunlight of day to fade into the darkness of dusk. You stopped paying attention to the time when you turned your phone off, unable to stomach the worried messages from those who love you - or at least they claim to. Whether you are someone capable of being loved is a question you ask more and more every day.

Part of you wants to hop up onto the wall, to sit on the edge and stare down on the city lights. You know better than to stare into the abyss, however - nothing good will come from tempting yourself and fate.

You don't want to die. Not really. You want this to stop. You want to smile so wide it makes your cheeks ache, and you want to bask in the sound of your own laughter again, like you did before the demons that haunt your mind took that from you too.

There's an empty hole inside of you, all jagged edges and tender flesh. You can't help but wonder if that marks the place where your soul should sit; if that gaping wound in your psyche should be filled with warmth and light and love. You think it was, once. You know it still is, sometimes. When you sit around a restaurant table with Jiro and Mina and Momo and Tsu, chatting about the latest pro hero rankings or whatever 'secret' the gossip magazines think they've uncovered this week. When you meet up with lzuku to go hunting for new All Might merch, Bakugo trailing behind pretending he's not just as excited as you are. When your schedules align and all of your school friends gather together and you end up refereeing an intense bout of Mario Kart.

When you're surrounded by your friends, you feel almost human. You can almost believe you deserve to love and be loved in return. You almost believe whatever is broken inside you is worth fixing.

You step towards the edge, elbows on the waist high concrete as you lean over, trying to take what small comfort you can from the city living and breathing below. Streetlights are beginning to flicker on, and the billboards and buildings are glittering like a starlit sky. You've never put your finger on why, but the city lights have always made you feel just a little less empty.

Would it really be so bad if this was the last thing you saw? You could close your eyes and find your peace in those lights burned into your eyelids and wind rushing all around you. The world would continue to turn, and your friends would find a way to exist without you. You're not so for gone that you can't admit it would hurt them, at first. They're nothing if not resilient, though; after everything you've all been through, you know they will be just fine.

You push up onto your tiptoes, leaning just a little further. It's so tempting, the idea of escaping, of finally feeling anything but broken.

A soft call of your name stops your thoughts in their tracks. You would know that voice in a chorus of thousands.

"Shoto. Why are you here?" Why would he bother ? Why would he seek you out? Why does he think you're worth even a second of his time?

You're not looking at him, but you can feel the concern radiating off him. For his sake, you take a step back - the last thing you want is to worry him. You suppose you would be worried too, in his position.

"Denki called me when you stopped answering his texts. He's worried about you." He doesn't voice his own worry, but you feel it all the same. You can imagine his furrowed brow, and the frown settling across his pretty face, and your stomach aches uncomfortably.

"How did you find me? I turned my phone off." Partly to isolate yourself, and partly to avoid anyone coming to find you. They all have more important things to do - none of them should have to deal with you like this.

Footsteps signal Shoto's approach, but you don't mind. Your selfish desire for comfort and connection overrides the shame and guilt building in your gut. He stops when he's standing next to you, shoulders only millimetres apart. You get the impression he longs to move closer.

"You always come up here. Best view of the city." His words are nonchalant, fact of the matter. As if he hasn't pressed a tiny Band-Aid over the hole in your soul, just by knowing that tiny, insignificant facet of who you are. You turn your head to look up at him, and he's already watching you. Mismatched eyes meet your own, and you feel like he's seeing all the broken pieces you've tried so hard to tape back together. That should terrify you, but it's him. If anyone can be trusted with the last struggling embers of your heart and your hope, it's Shoto.

Tears start to sting at your eyes, and you don't bother to stop them from making hot tracks down your cheeks. It's only when Shoto shrugs off his jacket and wraps it around your shoulders that you realise you're trembling. Whether it's because of the cold or the emotions running through you doesn't matter, because the residual warmth and familiar scent of Shoto's deodorant will soothe you all the same.

Shoto watches as you slip your arms into the sleeves, and he reaches out with deliberate care, holding out his hand to you in silent offer. You don't know what he's planning, but is it really important when you would follow him anywhere? He's already proved he'll do the same for you tonight.

You place a still shaking hand in his, and the smile he gives you is like a lighthouse in a storm. He cradles it reverently between both of his before rolling up the sleeve of his jacket. He repeats his actions for the other hand, and once he's done, he hesitates for a second before lifting your hand so he can drop a kiss to your knuckles. He lets your hand fall to your side, but he doesn't let go. Neither do you.

Sunlight breaks through your stormy skies - his warm side is closest to you, his hand toasty and soothing in yours, and something fledgling and hopeful tells you he planned it that way. Planned to reach out to you, planned to warm you from the inside out.

"Stay with me tonight." You open your mouth to protest, but you're silenced by the silent anguished desperation in his eyes, "Please."

"Okay."

Another warm little smile and a squeeze of your hand. His relief is palpable, and you make a mental note to thank Denki for raising the alarm. You don't know what you would have done if you stayed alone up here, but you know there's a chance you would have made a decision you couldn't come back from.

You don't want to die. Not really. You just want to feel the sun on your skin without always waiting for the stormclouds to roll in and obscure what makes your life worth living.

"You can make an appointment with the doctor tomorrow. I could ... come with you, if you like?" He looks so hesitantly hopeful, and a tiny smile tugs at your lips as you nod your approval. The two of you have been tentatively plotting a path towards each other since your school days; growing closer with every late night conversation and casual daytime adventure. Life together feels inevitable, which is why neither of you is in any rush - you would wait an eternity for him, just as he would for you.

Surrounded by him and reminded of the love your friends freely offer, rational thought is slowly but surely coming back to you. You're not okay, not by any means, but you want to be. You think you could be, with your friends by your side.

You don't know how long you've been up here, but as Shoto leads you away from the edge of the roof, his hand still warm in yours, you think it's been long enough.

[rei-ismyname]

Hi! I have a couple of questions for you regarding a topic that comics have neglected to the point of being ridiculous: romantic couples!

To start with, how do you write a romantic couple without making the usual mistakes?

Why is there a character, referring more to mutants, that no matter how hard the writers try, they can't give them a lasting relationship?

Who's your favorite romantic couple?

Which couple doesn't convince you, even if the writers insist?

Who among the mutants should not have any romantic ties until they resolve their issues?

Hello anon!

Interesting question/s. Romance! *Rubs hands.* I'm not sure if I'd agree that comics have neglected romance - or at least not only that - in fact pre-Marvel Timely (and even after) focused on romance comics for a long time. Patsy 'Hellcat' Walker might be the oldest Marvel character simply because she originated in the romance comic genre.

While Marvel expanded to horror, war etc and eventually pulp-turned superheroes, those romance roots were sunk deep. The romance formula is less about romance than romance comic tropes. You can see it through the 1963 run of X-Men where everyone, (including Chuck) pines for Jean. She in turn pines for Scott etc etc. I would argue that these roots blended with the general melodrama of cape comics and shifted into soap opera. However, Marvel identified their audience as white boys aged 6-11 (which I doubt was ever true) and, presuming their lack of interest, pushed it to the background.

Maybe that's semantics. I guess my point is that didn't really know how to write romance that wasn't sexist pulp, and they stopped trying to. Certain writers were more interested in romantic pairings than others, but it always comes back to drama through violence and selling books. Weddings sell books, sure, but so do breakups. Also, one writer will set up a couple and the next will ignore it or undo it.

That's fine, of course, but it does get in the way of long term couples. Even then, having to consider a relationship and give it page space takes time away from punching.

1. Honestly, I'm probably not the best person to answer this question. I have certainly studied and written a lot of creative works, but in terms of craft it's not really my department. It's a different proposition from genre to genre but I try to treat romantic relationships the same as any other - believable and relatable.

2. I kinda answered this in my opening paragraphs - the genre and serialisation doesn't really lend itself to romance. Characters status as IP gets in the way too, as Marvel especially tends to play it safe. They've been in business for decades without changing the status quo all that much, and certainly not permanently. There's exceptions to this, but there's just so many factors holding romantic pairings down - or keeping them together if the couple has become super popular. Take Betsy and Rachel, for instance. I love them together but writers don't seem to know what to do with them. Their books keep getting cancelled and it wouldn't surprise me if they were broken up. They get put in B or C tier books in a hostile environment with little margin for error, which makes it a self fulfilling prophecy.

3. Hmm. Favourite romantic couple. The loser husbands if I can pick them, but otherwise either Scott/Jean or Scott/Emma. Bei the Blood Moon and Cypher have a place in my heart too. Not sure about her place in the bioorganic transhumanist polycule Doug has with Warlock and Krakoa, but she certainly doesn't object. I like to think she slowly builds something with Warlock but doesn't really like Krakoa's smell or something. She puts in the work for Doug but now the point is moot bc The Island moved to another dimension of socialist bliss and Doug's a C3PO cosplayer now.

4. I'm sure there's plenty of others but Kitty and Colossus, of course. Terrible idea from the start and didn't improve. Not a big fan of Rogue and Gambit either. Their 'courtship' worked for me but I feel like they've become less than the sum of their parts. Maybe it's recency bias but they feel like 1.5 characters to me.

5 LOGAN. Also, pretty much everyone else. Definitely Logan though.

I'm aromantic and don't really think about this stuff a great deal. I don't ship; I more react to what's happening at present. These questions were difficult to answer so I hope they make sense.

❤️

[queer-ragnelle]

This might be a specific/niche question, but at what point in a projects lifespan do you recommend starting to shop for a sensitivity reader/editor? I know the answer is probably ‘nuance’ but idk if you have a certain take I’d be interested in hearing it since it seems like you’ve worked with a few

It highly depends on your project and what you intend to do with it. I only know how to go about acquiring sensitivity readers I paid out of pocket because I always intended to self-publish. If you plan to get an agent and query to publishers, I don't know where in there you would get sensitivity readers, if at all.

Sometimes free trades with strangers does more harm than good as people don't always take it very seriously. But it wouldn't hurt to trade feedback with a friend or writing group on a handful of chapters just to get a vibe check.

If you're going to bring someone in and pay them to give calculated criticism, you'd ideally have the entire manuscript "done." Then you order the readers by relevancy to the plot. That is, who's expertise is applicable to the most words.

So first my editor went through because sometimes entire chapters had to be rewritten. It would be a waste to have someone sensitivity read a portion which doesn't make it to the final draft anyway. The editor analyzes every word, sentence, paragraph, chapter, and manuscript carefully so it's nearly in its final form before paid readers get to it.

After the edit, I gave it to my Zoroastrian reader. Since the religion is so integral to the plot, I needed to be sure it was handled correctly. Anyone depicting real historical events or an old, lesser known culture/religion is obligated to do the best they can in depicting it sensitively and accurately, even if the story is fantasy.

Next came my Arthurian reader who gauged not only the execution of Arthurian content, but whether the Zoroastrian stuff was communicated effectively enough for someone entirely ignorant to understand.

Last came the people who were paid to read the full manuscript, but whose expertise only applied to a smaller portion of the content, such as my Jewish reader.

You will get feedback you disagree with. Leave a note for yourself and see if the next reader says the same thing or if only one person disagreed with your writing. There will be times readers don't like an entire character. You'll have to decide whether it's better to cut that character out entirely and write into the gap they left behind or ignore the advice. KEEP ORGANIZED!!!

What I do is create a new file for each of these readers while I have my "master manuscript” separate where all the changes will be applied. This way no comments on the reader's files will be "resolved" or deleted. You can always refer back to them just in case you want to reverse a change or reference what their exact advice was so you can apply it to future writing.

You can start "shopping" for these people now. Network. I got my Zoroastrian reader because I'm mutuals with a Zoroastrian blogger here on tumblr, but they couldn't do it, so they connected me with someone on Instagram who not only practices Zoroastrianism, but is a queer editor too. They fit the bill exactly to sensitivity read a story about queer Zoroastrian Ragnelle. I found my editor, who wrote his own Gawain book, from a Facebook writing group (hell). Another reader came from Discord. A second tumblr mutual took my cover commission (and read the whole book for good measure). A third tumblr mutual is formatting the inside for me. But in between all these people were, literally, dozens of duds. People who suggested more racial tension, or confused Ragnelle's brother Gromer with her Persian love interest, or said the Persian mythology was "distracting from the romance" yet seemed to take no issue with the Green Knight mythology, or tagged the instances of gender non-conformity as "unrealistic." So stay strong, keep searching, and get a contract drafted to protect yourself from thieves before you send your manuscript.

I hope that explains things! Not every writing journey will be the same, but that's how I did it. Good luck on your projects and on gathering your team! Take care. :^)

[ddarker-dreams]

Hellooooo I have been DYING to know this from you 👉👈. You know how there's a lot of tips for writing stuff? Well do you happen to have any tips for reading stuff? I want to read the books you recommend but I fear I'm just too dumb 😭 and won't understand what is going on let alone the themes and philosophies discussed. I feel like I would be insulting Dostoevsky by reading his work looool. We were never taught this stuff in schools ;O

I'm talking about critical thinking and analysis skills, media literacy, being able to picture and visualise sceneries; characters' voices/appearances etc., and just overall being able to comprehend one sentence that doesn't use the most basic active voice structure 😭 thank you if you choose to answer!!!!

SWEET ANON !!!! YOU ARE NOT DUMB !!!!

this is coming from a survivor of the american education system, so it might not be universal, but my experiences in middle/high school made me dislike reading books. no joke. i didn't see the point and thought reading the classics was a waste of time. i'm sure that's partially teenager arrogance, but from the conversations i've had with others, reading was rarely framed in a way that stoked intrigue. we're not given the tools to engage with the text so i'm rarely surprised when i see the worst takes imaginable on a piece of media i enjoy from a 14 year old.

i'm still learning myself when it comes to media literacy, it's an ongoing journey. when i read notes from underground for the first time last year i was literally so confused. i can normally read anywhere from 80k-100k words in one day if i'm motivated enough, but NFU, a novella at around 43k words, took me over a week.

i say all this to reassure you that you're not alone!

some advice that comes to mind when reading a dense work:

do some background research on the author. i know teachers hiss at wikipedia for some reason but reading a few paragraphs about the person's life, beliefs, politics, etc really helps put their writing into perspective.

look into the time period it was written. what were the pressing social issues at the time? who was in charge? what conflicts were ongoing/just ended? what was the predominant religion? books don't exist in a vacuum, a lot of the classics are filled with jabs at ideologies the author doesn't like (i'm looking at you, dante).

if the author's from a different country than you, getting a basic grasp on the culture helps a lot. with reading dostoevsky specifically, historical events like the emancipation of the serfs was an entirely new concept to my american brain.

not everything is going to make sense. sometimes the cultural/historical layers go so deep you'd need to have been alive at the time to immediately get it. fortunately, there are nerds with degrees in book who do extensive research and can give insight. i'll think i maybe understand a book okay, go to read a journal article on it, and go ??????? wat???? page 632 paragraph 3 references euclid's optics?? how was i supposed to know that.

finally, you're not going to like every book you read, even if it's well written. there's a difference between persevering and actively torturing yourself with words. if you dread picking it up again, there are other books to check out instead. there are some classics that i don't care for much (some of edgar allen poe's short stories, the fall by albert camus, no longer human by dazai osamu, to name a few).

ask yourself questions while reading. why did this character do that? is there a reoccurring motif throughout the work, and if so, why might the author be trying to highlight that? what perspective is the work from? is the protagonist lucid, are they an unreliable narrator? what themes are being explored here?

i hope some of this helps dsfhgkdjshgks there's a lot to be said on the subject but i didn't want this post to be miles long.

[sncrowns]

Tw: KoV, mention of r@pe

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Hot take.

(Maybe, not sure if anyone cares about this, it's me just me ranting).

I don't like it when people have headcanons, write fanfics, make art etc, about KoV that in some way ignore or invalidate the fcked up stuff that happens in it.

First off, I, personally, think there are two ways to interact with KoV.

1. Ignore it and pretend it doesn't exist.This is, honestly, probably the best and most logical way to deal with KoV. Unfortunately, I was not blessed with logic, so I'll have to settle for option two.

2. Talk about and explore the (unnecessary and extremely mishandled) themes of KoV.

What I don't like is when people create KoV content, but they just ignore the stuff that happened, like it doesn't exist.

Or when people headcanon it was 'all just a dream' or some bs like that.

Now, obviously, I can’t control how other people interpret media. And, honestly, I'm a staunch believer in "a diversity of opinion is always better" cause if we leash how people can talk about a piece of media, all of the art we make for that piece of media is going to turn stagnant as we just retread the same ideas over and over again.

But nothing grinds my gears more than people not interacting with KoV's themes. Cause when you do, I feel like you let KoV win. If you write an au where Sam and Taurtis weren't assholes and nothing bad happened to Grian, or if you think it was just some boardgames they played, you let KoV not be taken seriously!

You don't have to talk about the stuff that happened in it, cause they were just pretending in-universe! You might as well email SamGladiator saying that including R@PE in your MINECRAFT ROLEPLAY for KIDS was a totally normal idea, cause that's what you're getting across. KoV's VERY mishandled themes are so unserious you can just not talk about them when talking about KoV.

I'm sorry about that last paragraph, it might have been a bit far. I know people are having fun, I just don't think you can separate KoV from it's fcked up themes. Especially when Grian is involved. KoV has 10 episodes. Episode 5 is when it's uncomfortable themes start appearing. Actually, scratch that, episode ONE is when they start making jokes about sa.

For reference, it's after Taurtis states he doesn't want to go back to the dungeons, Sam asks 'do the guards visit you at night?' Obviously meaning 'do they assault you?' It's episode ONE and c!Sam (and, also cc!Sam) can't stop himself from joking that shit.

Honestly this just makes me really mad and, along with KoV Sam and Taurtis being irredeemable, cruel assholes who know exactly what they're doing, is the one hill I'll die on.

[makingshortstorieslong]

so I re-read We Have Always Lived in the Castle

a couple of take aways - naturally, major spoilers for the book here:

I know it says immediately in the iconic opening paragraph that Merricat is eighteen years old but wow is that hard to keep in mind. I kept reminding myself this time. I'm not sure but I honestly may have read it the first time with her as 14 in my mind even knowing how that conflicts with the timeline. So it was really noticeable this time how Constance and Charles (particularly Charles) refer to her as a kid.

speaking of Charles referring to Merricat, I noticed how everyone referred to each other in this read through a lot. Charles with "Connie" and "Mary" - trying to sound very familiar, like one of the family, like he knows them and cares about them. Meanwhile Constance is the only one calling him "Cousin Charles" - she wants that family connection. • I still love everything about Jonas and Merricat's view of him. Reminds me of my old roommate (cat). Cats are so communicative actually if you pay attention and you know one well. • I FORGOT that Uncle Julian believes Merricat is dead! it's so easy to just not notice him never referring to her. And it's interesting that while otherwise he may be confused, thinking Constance is his wife or that the rest of the family are still alive, I think he consistently ignores Merricat and acts like she's dead. Which. Yeah can we talk about how he came to that conclusion. Does he know who actually poisoned the sugar and that's why he has to believe she's dead, because he couldn't live with her? Idk I need to think about it. • I also forgot, really truly do not remember even a little bit and was so struck by, the scene where Merricat goes to the summer house and imagines the family still alive and showering her with adoration and saying they'd never punish her. That part was like. Chilling this time. • Not sure if I forgot or didn't pick up on this the first time, although this time I noticed how it's pointed out several times over in close succession towards the end of the book, that all of Merricat's "not allowed"s are self-imposed, not rules laid by Constance. I certainly suspected earlier on that at least some of them were due to her magical thinking, but others, like not handling food, seemed like rules Constance might have made. But Constance's reaction in the end makes it sound to me like ALL of them come from within Merricat.

I felt so sad at the end in particular about Merricat's range shrinking. I liked her special places by the creek and in the tall grass; I would have loved them myself if I grew up there, would love them now if I could visit. • also thought more about Constance this time around. Uh. Wow. Idk what to say other than I want to read someone else's analysis of what all is going on in her mind. • last thing, and it's weird: I don't know WHY I somehow remembered there being weird romantic (and you know. Incestual :/ ) tones to Constance and Charles's relationship, but I didn't get that this time. I remembered he was after their money, the family fortune, and somehow I thought there was an implication of him trying to marry Constance, but I must have this mixed up with something else because it seemed pretty familial this time around, I didn't get those other implications.

anyway. :) it's a very good book.

[mariana-oconnor]

The Three Gables pt 2

A little late, because life and Christmas are just... it's a lot.

Last time we had a lady who wanted to sell her house and someone who really wanted to buy it and everything in it. Including the remaining possessions of her dead son. Who had died of pneumonia? I think, but also been involved with some sort of woman his mother did not approve of.

And a servant was fired after everyone was kind of terrible to her, even if she was spying for some bad guys.

And there was a lot of racism, which I expect will increase.

Anyway

"Now, Watson, this is a case for Langdale Pike, and I am going to see him now."

Ah, it's another randomly referenced character that it sounds like we should know and yet we do not. Unless I have forgotten him. I don't think I've forgotten him.

Langdale Pike was his human book of reference upon all matters of social scandal. This strange, languid creature spent his waking hours in the bow window of a St. James's Street club and was the receiving-station as well as the transmitter for all the gossip of the metropolis. He made, it was said, a four-figure income by the paragraphs which he contributed every week to the garbage papers which cater to an inquisitive public.

OMG, he's the paparazzi!

Well, the Edwardian equivalent of it.

Holmes, I thought better of you than this. You're really feeding this guy information. Ugh.

'Please come out at once. Client's house burgled in the night. Police in possession. — Sutro.' Holmes whistled. “The drama has come to a crisis, and quicker than I had expected."

Really? You must have known you sped up their timetable a little. They knew you'd gone to see the place and they were worried enough about you they tried to warn you off. It makes sense that seeing you there would move up their plans.

“Well, they don't seem to have got much. Mrs. Maberley was chloroformed and the house was— Ah! here is the lady herself.”

She was chloroformed and it's just an ordinary burglary? I hate to see what you call an odd burglary.

Just going to skip over the extra racism.

“Well, I don't think there is anything of value missing. I am sure there was nothing in my son's trunks.”

You hadn't even looked in them and Holmes told you that he thought there was something in them. Why are you so confident in this, lady?

"It is in my son's handwriting.” “Which means that it is not of much use,” said the inspector. “Now if it had been in the burglar's—” “Exactly,” said Holmes. “What rugged common sense!"

Please allow me to use my Holmes-English dictionary. I'll just check... yeah... Mmhm.

“I never pass anything, however trifling,” said he with some pomposity. “That is my advice to you, Mr. Holmes."

Oh, oh no. Oh poor boy. You are being set up for the biggest of falls. You have no genre savvy. I'm sorry. This will hurt.

“Seems to be the end of some queer novel, so far as I can see.”

Please, tell me more.

“Why should they go to my son's things?” asked Mrs. Maberley.

Clearly they wanted the manuscript of his magnum opus of homoerotic literature, Mrs Maberley. I can see no other possible reason.

And honestly, relatable.

"Man must live for something. If it is not for your embrace, my lady, then it shall surely be for your undoing and my complete revenge.”

🔥VENGEANCE!🔥

So it's not a homoerotic bodice ripper, at all. It's a tell-all memoir.

"I hear that she is about to marry the young Duke of Lomond, who might almost be her son."

Refreshing to see an older woman-younger man romance portrayed for once. Usually it's the older man preying on the sweet young ingenue. This time the sexual predator is the woman. Although... honestly, nothing that's been said so far makes me think she's doing anything but having a good time.

“Not at home means not at home to you,” said the footman.

RUDE!

The lady had come, I felt, to that time of life when even the proudest beauty finds the half light more welcome.

Also rude!

Come on, Watson. You're not exactly young yourself at this point. And you're still apparently marrying people left right and centre. Do you hide in the shadows?

Pah.

...two wonderful Spanish eyes which looked murder at us both.

I know what he means by this, but also I am imagining her irises being the Spanish flag.

Beautiful.

“I need not explain, madame. I have too much respect for your intelligence to do so—though I confess that intelligence has been surprisingly at fault of late.”

Holmes is in such a bitchy mood in this one. He's just insulting everyone as much as he can. I kind of love it.

"I feel that I may be frank with you, Mr. Holmes. You have the feelings of a gentleman. How quick a woman's instinct is to find it out. I will treat you as a friend.”

Wow...the bullshit is strong with this one.

“No doubt it was foolish of me to threaten a brave man like yourself.”

You should totally stroke his bicep and ask if he works out. That's clearly where this is heading. Lolol!

“No, no, you would not. You are a gentleman. It is a woman's secret.”

Wow. Just... wow. Weaponising femininity indeed.

✨ Gaslight. ✨ Gatekeep. ✨ Girlboss. ✨

So roguish and exquisite did she look as she stood before us with a challenging smile that I felt of all Holmes's criminals this was the one whom he would find it hardest to face. However, he was immune from sentiment.

That's because unlike you, he is not ruled by his horny brain, Watson. Please, take some deep breaths, drink a glass of cold water and come back when you've calmed down. You were literally just saying you thought she was too old to stand in proper lighting, my dude. Down boy!

"Because I had given he seemed to think that I still must give, and to him only. It was intolerable."

OK, fine. I'm on her side now. She's still the most ridiculous person ever, but this is a valid and correct point. Douglas needed to take no as an answer.

Barney and the boys drove him away, and were, I admit, a little rough in doing so.

I'm torn. On the one hand, Douglas needed to understand that just because his sense of entitlement told him she owed him something, he really didn't. On the other hand, don't hire people to beat people up. Maybe just hire bodyguards to keep turning him away and save the beating for if he escalates?

I feel like everyone sucks in this story.

This... this is the same story from Charles Augustus Milverton except the female character is rich and has agency. And yet we're supposed to not side with the people who stole back the blackmail material that would ruin her? Because she's promiscuous?

Yeah, she's kind of terrible, but her crime was getting people to beat him up. The theft seems fair, honestly.

“Very good. I think you will sign me a check for that, and I will see that it comes to Mrs. Maberley. You owe her a little change of air."

Yeah, she was chloroformed and it's possible that the beating led to her son's death. She definitely deserves something for all of this.

"Have a care! You can't play with edged tools forever without cutting those dainty hands.”

Weird line to end on, but okay. Basically 'fuck around and find out' in Holmes speak, I guess.

But yeah, this is just a different version of Charles Augustus Milverton and A Scandal in Bohemia only this time the lady is the bad guy. And she actually has done some horrible things. But if she'd come to you and said 'Mr Holmes, I had an ill advised dalliance with a young man and I need the evidence before it ruins my upcoming wedding!' Holmes might have done the burglary himself.

Well, probably not if he found out about her having Douglas beaten up.

But it's a weird change of perspective.

[abberantmachine]

it is funny how. just about every video talking about javascript arrays/objects/functions/what-have-you is likely to use the same analogy

"well, if a javascript object is like a car... the constructor is like a blueprint... and you can define what colour and model it is... and you can have an object array that is like a garage for your cars..."

"let's make an array of people, define a 'first name' and 'last name', then look! you can use a function inside the constructor to add the first and last name together and set it as the 'full name'-"

"to demonstrate this array function, LeT's StArT wItH a LiSt Of FrUiT, lEt'S hAvE a ShOpPiNg LiSt AnD tHe ArRaY iS lIkE a ShOpPiNg TrOlLeY!"

you can use arrays to hold information as in like. link directories. that's how my whole folder system is built, I don't need to manually add new URLs or anything because whenever I add a new subject tag, having it be part of that array means all the functions I set up will write it into the HTML automatically.

and yes, the archive entries themselves are their own array that I can filter and sort. I have a constructor as a base template for each entry, ensuring they each have: image sources (which are actually their own array inside the object, so I can add multiple), a date (which, if I'm not sure, setting the day and month to 0 and estimating the year will signal to the constructor to change it to something like "unknown, approx 2015" instead of an exact date), a description (which also gets formatted into html so if I want to say, add paragraphs, links or lists inside this variable I can totally do that), content/subject tags to make sure they get sorted into the right places and really just the "display" and "feature" flags which are ways of feeding data back to the CSS about how I want to display things and as a way of filtering particular pieces I like respectively.

you could use a javascript array to make a directory of comics and how many pages each comic has and what the sources are for each page and if it has bonus features or any other specs about how you want to display it and what it links up to.

you could program a cryptographic dial and program a function to assign different symbols to different letters of the alphabet depending on which position it's set at and if it's supposed to read clockwise, or counter clockwise, or alternating - you could have all of those as functions applying different rules in different circumstances.

you could have, fuck, I don't know, a program that alters what pronouns the user is referred to as based on settings they choose?? by having a little placeholder signalling what kind it is and using the string.replace function to switch it out?

I FEEL LIKE MAYBE YOU COULD USE AN EXAMPLE OF SOMETHING SOMEONE MIGHT WANT TO DO?

[chrysanthxmvm]

RP spots open! Intro post.

Hello! You can call me Tsuki, I'm a 28F roleplayer always looking for people to share ideas and RP with! This is permanently open until stated otherwise.

I always include NSFW elements in my roleplays, so MDNI, please and thank you! I'd prefer if my writing partners are 21+ as well.

My plotlines always revolve around MxM romance dynamics and I'd be more than happy to include others if we do end up clicking well. I usually use anime/2D visuals for the characters, but 3D references can be used for any other purposes.

My favorite genres are (high) fantasy, slice of life, historical settings, or even elements of mystery and sci-fi in any of the mentioned before. I do NOT do well with writing dead dove or toxic relationships as the main focus, I just get bored, but I'm more than fine discussing them as part of a character's background and present impact in their lives! I'm more interested in the relationship aspect and them navigating an exterior situation.

If I sound like someone you'd like to write with, read more below the cut!

I have a busy life from time to time. Some days I will be able to reply one or two times with no problem, but others it might take me a couple of days to do so; in any case, I try to make sure to let people know what the situation is. ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡) I have no problem waiting in return.

However! I would love love love if we could have OOC chatter and be able to stay in constant communication regarding our characters. Making pinterest boards, playlists and sharing fanart is one of my favorite things to do!

In terms of lenght, I can go anywhere from a medium-sized paragraph to 500+ words. Of course, lenght will determine how fast I can reply. I mostly write on Discord.

I have some OCs that I can use for different RPs, depending on the idea, but I also do a good number of Canon characters that we can write against each other. I will be sure to make another post listing them and edit it into here!

Last but not least, for NSFW, I can go from anywhere between pure shameless smut, to a plot-driven roleplay idea but some smut scenes here and there.

Thank you for reading!

(˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

[an-aura-about-you]

are we ready for another chapter of Handbook for Mortals?

no but we're gonna do it anyway.

getting to Chapter 17:

when we last left our hero, Scheherazade was at death's door and laid out on her childhood bed, but nobody seems overly fussed about that because instead of actually trying to help her we're all gonna listen to Dela tell the story of how she and Charles honked at each other from across the circus and agreed to make an insufferable clown baby.

Chapter 17: The Lovers

-Zade tells us in the narration that her mother's storytelling is worthy of Spielberg. can we get any more blatant about who she'd want directing the movie?

-the year we get for when Zade's parents properly meet is 1977, FINALLY giving us something that resembles a timeline. idk if we're actually gonna find out when they bone, but if they do indeed do the horizontal mambo at some point before 1977 ends, then the latest possible time that Scheherazade could reasonably be born would be the autumn of 1978.

if Zade is 25ish, given the weeks upon weeks she's spent in Vegas going by with no mention of a birthday, the most reasonable year for this book to be set is 2004 with the assumption that Zade's birthday is coming up soon at this point.

I'm not even sure what to make of that.

-another tally point for casual use of the g-slur.

-Dela is described as a "gorgeous young girl" in the story she's telling us. like ok, glad to know where Zade gets the bragging.

-also Dela is just 18, so we're invoking Barely Legal here.

-the narration refers to Charles as a boy, but they just said he's 20. that's a full grown man. a young one, but still.

-ok so this is weird. one paragraph already referred to him as Charles, but the paragraph after it has a bit that says, "while the boy who was known as Charles." why is that here? why aren't we just calling him Charles at this point?

-Dela is thinking about how she doesn't like Charles and Charles is trying to figure out how to charm her since all the girls normally fawn over him. so far, their relationship appears to be framed as some kind of conquest.

-I'm frustrated that Sarem used the same metaphor I've used in one of my fics, though she doesn't go the same way with it as I did. Dela describes her ability to see the future like being in a house and looking through a window and how she would go insane if she tried to see everything. I'm actually not sure what she's getting at with the window. does she mean that it's a narrow scope? because it's also possible to see what's going on by going outside. the whole reason this came up is because Charles teased that she should know why he's come to see her since she can tell the future, but she's trying to explain to him that she's not looking at every single bit of the future.

-Charles thinks Dela's a con-artist and is not impressed with her cold reading skills so far.

-until she manages to tell him what he's been having nightmares about, something he hasn't told anyone about, so he's now on board believing she might be the real deal.

-Dela about her tarot cards: "They don't bite, I promise. I may, but they don't."

suddenly I'm glad Sarem skipped over all the flirting between Zade and the boys.

-wait now Charles is 21? there hasn't been a time jump, we're still in the same scene we've been in!

-they are also dragging this joke out as if it's peak flirting. maybe a year HAS passed. reading that paragraph has certainly aged me.

-why is Zade thinking about her mother having a sultry voice?

oh yeah, I didn't mention this before, but back in the big magic illusion, Zade takes the time to mention in the narration that the young man in the trick looked the way Charles did as a teenager. and if you remember, the young man kissed her at one point.

Zade has weird incestuous feelings about her parents confirmed.

-apparently all Charles needs to do to impress Dela is show off his Sick Shuffling Skillz.

-Zade. why did we need to read about your dad looking down your mom's shirt?

why did you WANT to look over that memory in enough detail to include it?

all I can think of is the memory reel in Sasha's mind in Psychonauts when we see him using his psychic powers to see his father's memories of his mother, who died in his infancy. he accidentally stumbles upon a moment like this and obviously recoils upon seeing it.

-Dela, like Zade, wears clothes that hug her "in all the right places."

-for some reason, Dela is flattered that Charles was staring at her boobs. I guess we know what Sarem's formula for Twoo Luv is and that's being desired.

-ok so here's the dealio: Charles has been having nightmares about getting shot, and the reason why is he fucked his assistant Betty and didn't think anything about it but she thought they were gonna be together- HEY WAIT! THIS IS JUST WHAT CLARA DID TO MAC! only this time we're supposed to sympathize with Charles instead of Betty even though she's in the role Mac was in because obviously Betty is crazy and she's gonna try to shoot Charles.

-ok, Sarem actually gets points for Charles having this incredibly relatable reaction to finding out Betty's been watching him sleep: a good sarcastic, "That's not creepy at all."

-oh and the thing that's tipped Betty over the edge/the reason why she's gonna shoot him soon is Charles slept with another girl recently and she's jealous af. Charles doesn't even remember who else he slept with at first.

-why is Charles rating his sexual partners in front of Dela?

-Dela says Betty's gonna switch out the shells in the gun for a trick Charles does, but that's not how prop guns work. they are not built for real bullets. Betty would have to swap out the gun itself for this to work.

-Dela apparently sees something when she and Charles hold hands at the end of her little plan for how he'll survive getting shot, but she won't tell him what. I think it's her knowing they're gonna bang and have Zade.

and the chapter ends with Charles kissing Dela's hand on his way out, which made her shiver like a bunch. yeah, she knows they're gonna bang, calling it here.

this bit of the story isn't done, by the way. the flashback is, but Dela and Charles are gonna tell us how things worked out. man, I wonder if Charles is gonna die.

for that matter, I wonder if Zade, who has still been narrating these chapters, is gonna die.

[typingwithmyhandstied]

Do you have any guesses for what some of the Taylor Swift references in fhh will be?

I have no real solid it will definitely happen guesses. I do have some that I would really like that might actually be possible.

Mine: it is very plausible with Rosalind and Orion's pasts. Plus, I would love it.

Last Kiss: I don't think Chloe could resist it at this point.

Would've Could've Should've: it's on the playlist, and it would be a very fitting one. I will be taking it as a reference if she uses any of these words in the same paragraph or even page.

It's Time To Go: I swear if this is referenced in Oliver's pov in flashbacks of him leaving, I might actually like him (I don't blame him for leaving to begin with only other crap). I also think this could be referenced in other contexts too.

Daylight: this is the one I am betting on. Mostly because I would freak out. I really love this song (I got to see it live yayyayayay). I do think Chloe already kind of referenced it in TPATS but-

It's Nice To Have A Friend: I do think this would be possible with a Rosalind and Orion wedding most likely being the ending. This would be one of the songs to reference for sure. If she referenced this with Philas, I think I might faint.

No Body No Crime: you never know... mostly putting this on here because if it was referenced in regard to Alisa, I would freak out.

I feel like there's a good chance there'll be a few Midnights references. Maybe midnight rain, hits different, mastermind, etc. Paris is in the FLF playlist too.

I feel like there is more I might be forgetting at the moment, so I will reblog if I think of any. I'm curious to know what you think!

[celestie0]

Hellow, it is I again, coming out of my silent corner once more ^^ So first of all, thanks for the quick reply (which I didn't even think you'd do tbh) and nice words and I totally didn't blush and giggle at the last paragraph :'D So, I dug a little deeper and found all kinds of definitions and explanations, supporting both sides of it, but I think generally speaking and also in the community (which I myself am not a part of, I just know people) the association of gang bang with rape is rather old fashioned and is not really used as such anymore, instead straight up referring to it as gang rape. So you actually can have a consensual gang bang and it is rather the norm but again, I might be wrong here, since I'm too no real expert in this field either, but that's how I and a lot of people seem to interpret it nowadays. Obviously, I totally get that some people are offended or even getting triggered by that word, since it has had this negative connotation for quite some time now and I hope I didn't offend or hurt anyone with my account I did, I just thought it should be more clarified, but I totally get when you're just not using the term at all, just to be on the safe side ^^' I also searched for equal terms, trying to figure out what else to call it, since it interested me as well (the FBI agent going through my internet history surely has their fun) and the closest thing I found was 'polyandry', which defines a woman having multiple husbands, although it is more used to describe marriage instead of sexual intercourse. Apparently there are people referring to it as binge, revelry, jag, carousal and a bunch of other stuff, but tbh I've never ever heard anyone ever referring to that personally but you never know… Also, fun fact: in Germany (where I originate from) we apparently have a word for it called 'Fleischlego' which quite literally translates to 'meat lego' which I thought was kinda funny :'D Anyways, I dunno what drove me to deep dive into this topic so much and I'm sorry if I caused any unpleasantries for both you and your community. Imma sit in my silent corner again now and hope you'll have a nice day <3

hiii again my love <3

ouuu yknow you might be right ab the distinction between gangbang vs gang rape, i can see that being an old fashioned definition and then people reshaped it into gangbang for consensual multi persons intercourse. and yeah! better safe than sorry type of thing :'') i mean it's not like that word is a huge part of my regular vocabulary anyways LOL but i don't think it's bad to avoid it when needed. thanks a lot for looking into it more! i definitely feel validated in the definition i had in mind for it initially

LOL meat lego sounds so funny tbh i wish i could use that instead!! we need to adopt that terminology into english language 100%

noooo honey i don't think you upset anyone or caused anything unpleasant! you're so sweet n respectful n ty again for sharing what you know n what you've found. you're an angel!! <3