#Why do I love plants so much they are such a pain to draw
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Only the coolest plants for the bestest of birthdays
#Why do I love plants so much they are such a pain to draw#Especially the coolest carnivorous plants#“Let me take 30 minutes on something for them” 3 hours later#Chibi style is so cute and easy! I haven't done it in a while it'll be fun!#Okay enough complaining Minegishi doesn't deserve this they only deserve the best on this day#I will go outside and touch plants for you#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA scrunkle little character grr I wish they had merch of you#toshiki minegishi#mp100#Yeah I know I can't draw bouquets this is my second attempt and only finished one#My pfp is actually a part of a bouquet I was working on but only got the orchids finished and needed a plant for here#So I slapped a fun bg on and boom#Might take these and do something because they were so much effort and I like carnivorous plants more than orchids#I'd love to say I'm never drawing pitcher plants ever again but sadly I have a comic with Minegishi that I am in desperate need to finish#One of my summer project goals that I will complete before the school year starts again
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poly jingren x reader has been on my mind 4 so longgg.. ITS SO BADD. please give me more thirsts or thoughts abt poly!jingren x reader i’m lovin them rn | hint of fluff, mostly nsfw
short lil thirst ! jing yuan + blade x fem!reader (use of she/her pronouns), big dick jing yuan + blade foreal, reader implied 2 be shorter in height, degrading terms (whore, slut, etc), mentions of squirting, mating press + full nelson, SIZE KINK!! SIZE KINK!!, blade’s a lil mean but it’s ok bc it’s blade!, cum cum lots of cum (sounds funny but it’s okay </3) | overall suggestive content minors do not interact
poly!jingren who would have different tolerance of your brattiness. jing yuan having the highest patience for u n blade having the least! you always run to jing yuan whenever blade talks abt punishing u n he thinks it’s soso cute :(( he’s always protecting you, nuzzling against his chest with your arms wrapped around his huge body, ur so cute! a darling you are..
jing yuan always tried dodging the idea of you wearing short skirts in public, why? you would make his dick hard, easy. but, you decided it was a good idea to wear the shortest skirt known 2 mankind one day, paying him a visit at his office. imagine this, jing yuan would be at his office doing work at his desk n all of the sudden you walk in looking all slutty, a short skirt that just barely covers your plushy thighs and ass, he would brush it off at first up until you purposely drop the pen on his desk bending down to pick it up. once you stood up, you would already be bent over his desk. that’s what you wanted, after all. “are you trying to tempt me, dove? because it sure is working.” jing yuan has zero patience whenever you’re acting like a whore in public, he would plant kisses all over your back and pound into you like there’s no tomorrow, his big dick stretching you out :(( choked moans would leave your throat, rambling on about how rough he was being with you, and that people might hear you and walk in, but he didn’t care, infact that was the last of his worries. he savoured the feeling of your tight walls pulsing around his cock, cumming inside and cumming on your panties too! i hope u’ll enjoy the stickiness between your thighs <3 (he’ll snitch to blade too abt it, what a bitch)
poly!jingren would be protective over you, even though they’re a pain to be with sometimes due to their constant arguments and disagreements, dating them does have its benefits. they would stand on either side of you, one on your left and one on your right. geez, you look so cute compared to them, it’s like you were walking around with two dogs on your leash, reading to pounce at anyone who dares speak ill of you or touches you. speaking of size.. i feel like they’d both have a size kink, you’re just so short compared to them they can’t help but fantasize about bending you over and fucking you in different positions, i feel like they both each have their favourites on that.
jing yuan loves putting you in a mating press, he likes it becuz it makes him cum quicker! not even a few thrusts and he’s already cumming inside, loving how you squirt all over his cock. he would press your knees against your chest, folding you in half almost. he would gently draw circles on your knee while the tip of his dick kisses your cervix, he’s so sweet to you though.. whispering praises in your ear. he would catch you off guard sometimes due to how sweet he was with you, not noticing how much he came, staring down at the mess he made in your cunt w cum seeping out </3
blade would absolutely love folding you in a full nelson, bro has sm strength it scares you sometimes. he would hook his arms under your knees, thrusting his hips into you. “sucha’ whore for my cock, aren’t you? you like it when i fuck you hard like this, don’t you?” mmm also also maybe if he’s feeling it, i bet bro would let jing yuan would join too, but he wouldn’t impale you with his dick like blade is, no.. he would rub his cock against your slit, placing kisses on your legs. honestly, jing yuan is your saviour atp. cuz everytime blade folds you in a full nelson, he’s always concerned that he’ll break you, so he tries telling him to ease it up a bit with you <3
poly!jingren would have god like stamina and strength, great speed n strength comes w great consequences! whether it is in a non sexual way or not, i feel like their stamina n strength would be useful in your relationship, its a lil cute since ur kinda shorter in height n they would always tower over u n help i get things from the high shelf or cabinet, it’s so cute! <33 but yet.. it’s a lil scary in bed cuz they can last so long w u and fuck you until you forget your own name, but it’ll be fine!! you can handle them!
poly!jingren both probably didn’t realize they had a size kink until they got intimate with you, it was probably the last of their worries up until one night. blade would probably notice a cute little bump on your stomach, noticing just how small you rlly are compared to them, jing yuan would too! honestly they both just love how their huge cocks slide in and out of your pussy, the bulge on your stomach going down, up, down up, over and over again! you’re just so.. cute they can’t help but stretch your little pussy out a bit.
“cmon sweetheart, you got this. you’re so cute, mhm.. you can handle more right?“
“sure she can, she’s strong girl. if shes— mmp.. squeezing around us like that, i’m sure she can handle more.”
“mm.. mhm. i can see that.” jing yuan leaned down, bringing his voice down to a whisper, “do you like it when we stretch you out with our cocks like this, baby?”
“fuck yeah she does, look at her. she’s creaming on our cocks already. s’ messy.”
poly!jingren who would both try their best to be gentle to you, sometimes it backfires but you don’t seem to mind! what’s very true about them is they both don’t want to hurt you in anyway, sure they fuck you hard enough and punish you but their intentions r never to hurt u, they would always ask you if you’re okay, even if they see the slightest hint of discomfort or pain in your face. especially jing yuan, he’s rlly rlly sweet n same goes to blade but he shows it in his own way. u know that blade doesn’t mean half of the things he says (he knows ur a slut for their cock tho but that’s besides the point) n sometimes he can get carried away but he would apologize with a simple “sorry.” and ask you if he was too rough on you, both r sweethearts yk
#ᖭི༏ᖫྀ maryse’s diary ૮꒰˶˃̵ ^ ˂̵˵꒱ა#ᖭི༏ᖫྀ thirsts ૮꒰ᐡ ɞ̴̶̷ ̫ ᴗ̤ ᐡ꒱ა#maryse’s thoughts : poly jingren x reader <3#jing yuan <33#blade <33#honkai star rail smut#hsr smut#blade x reader#jing yuan smut#blade smut#jing yuan x reader#hsr x you#blade x you#honkai star rail x reader#jing yuan x you#THEY SO FINE
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Something you’ll never know
synopsis: you and aeri were inseparable while you were growing up. Is that connection still there?
word count: 15k (jeeez) (it could've been 3 parts but I love you all so much so here you are)
cw: angst, cussing, drinking, f reader, childhood best friends to...(?) idk if there's any i missed please lmk!
notes! So sorry if its a confusing read with the timelines and such. the italic paragraphs are flashbacks/memories! for clarification Aeri and reader are ages 12, 22, and then 30 in this. It's inspired by the movie Past Lives (one of my fav movies, I recommend it!) barely proofread again, I also tried to add extra space in between different scenes, I hope it flows okay!
This is my first angsty fic ever but I had a lot of fun writing it! I really hope you enjoy it and if you'd like to, lmk your thoughts!!
as always dms and asks are always open!
xoxo love youuu (: <3
20 years ago in Southern California, SM Elementary School
Ever since you can remember, Aeri Uchinaga has been a constant presence in your life. You first met in preschool, where she quickly took a liking to you for reasons you couldn't quite understand. As a ‘slow-to-warm-up’ child, you were perfectly fine with doing quiet activities on your own while your classmates ran around, chatting amongst themselves. But Aeri must have seen you as a challenge or a game, maybe? She was determined to crack the ice and see what lay beneath your quiet exterior. She would always join you at the drawing table and start rambling about a variety of things that crossed her mind or even go as far as sharing her stuffed animals with you when she saw you playing ‘family’ alone with your own.
And before you knew it, she had you hooked. Aeri was more outspoken than you at the time, and she often took the reins in your friendship, but you were (more than) happy to follow her lead. You quickly learned that she had a habit of charging in head first, and it became your unspoken mission to keep her from getting into too much trouble.
You promised yourself that you'd always be there supporting her from behind.
You dribbled the soccer ball skillfully toward the goal, weaving through defenders with ease. Just as you were about to score, a loud yelp from the basketball court made you stop dead in your tracks. Your hesitation cost you as a player from the opposing team slid in, tackling you. Pain shot through your leg as your planted foot twisted in a way that it should NOT twist.
You got up from the ground and ignored the pain as you waved to a classmate on the sideline to take your place on the field. You limped as quickly as you could toward the court from the field, fighting back tears. The adrenaline kept you moving.
Eventually you made it to the basketball court where Aeri was.
“Are you okay?” you asked as you reached a hurt Aeri, who was hissing slightly at the sight of her skinned knee. Almost every ounce of pain washed away when you saw her.
She looked up, surprised, as your shadow blocked the sun. To her, you probably looked like an angel.
“Y/n,” she sniffled, “Where did you come from?”
“I was just playing soccer,” you replied, kneeling in front of her and offering your back. “Here, hop on. Let’s get you to the nurse.”
“Mm~ okay,” Aeri shyly mumbled as she climbed onto your back, resting her chin in the crook of your neck as you hobbled toward the infirmary.
“How did you know I was hurt?” she inquired softly.
“I dunno, my Aeri instincts must've kicked in... But you do have a pretty distinctive scream that I could hear all the way from the soccer field” You chuckled
“Ah~! What!? That’s so embarrassing!” She buried her face into your neck. “Why did you come over? You said you were playing soccer?”
“Well yeah I was, but remember when we were five and had our first sleepover?” you asked, chuckling. “Ya know, the one where you couldn’t stop crying because you missed your parents, especially your mom.”
“Hey! Why bring that up now?” she groaned, playfully hitting your back with her fists. “It wasn’t my choice! My parents were busy with work, okay!”
“Nono~ we made a pinky promise, remember? I told you, ‘I’ll always be here for you, no matter what.’ And I vaguely remember claiming I’d be your prince or somethin' like that.. I’m just keeping my word.” You smiled at the memory.
“That was like seven years ago…I can't believe you even remember that” she sighed contentedly. “Well, thank you, my prince.” she let out a teasing chuckle
“Of course, Lady Aeri,” you replied in a playful, formal tone, adjusting her higher on your back with a little hop.
There was a small break of silence before Aeri took notice of the cadence of your steps.
“...Wait, are you limping?” Her tone suddenly turned serious, like a mother about to scold her child.
“Uh…” You hesitated, “No…?” you chuckled nervously hoping she'd drop the topic (she didn't).
She peeked over your shoulder and saw your left ankle, red and beginning to swell.
“Ah~! What happened!? Let me down, I can walk! You idiot!” she exclaimed, trying to wriggle off your back.
“No way! We’re almost there anyways, and all this wiggling isn’t helping the pain either!” you bickered with the girl on your back before finally reaching the school entrance.
After school, your mom tended to your hurt ankle. It wasn’t anything serious, just a mild sprain. You worked silently on your assignment before she spoke up.
“Y/n, honey~” your mom cooed before sitting down next to you at the kitchen table while you were doing homework. “What do you think about Aeri? Do you like her?”
“Hmm,” You hummed while placing your pencil down as memories of her flooded your mind.
One specific memory came to the forefront of your mind,
You and Aeri were laying in the lush grass together with your heads touching and holding hands.
“Aeri, look!” You pointed to the sky “I see a shark.. Or maybe a really big tuna?” a playful giggle escaped your lips
“Mhm~!” she agreed, “Look over there! Doesn’t that look like Haku from Spirited Away?” Aeri’s eyes widened in excitement as her favorite character appeared in the sky, her finger excitedly pointing
“Yeah! I think it does!” You stole a glance of her.
Her eyes were glued to the blue sky adorned with fluffy white clouds that looked like they felt like cotton candy. The sun reflected against her dark brown hair and made it look like a beautiful dark ocean rippling in the wind
It was a cool summer day. A gentle breeze wafted her scent of strawberry shampoo and a light rose scent from her deodorant. The sky stretched over both of you like a blue canvas with puffy cotton balls. The warmth of the sunshine wrapped the two of you into an embrace only you both could feel.
You stared at her with so much… happiness? While she pointed out various shapes, her face lit up more and more each time she spotted one
“What is this feeling?” You thought “It feels like i’m going down a steep slope of a rollercoaster when I’m around her”
“Hm~ Y/n? Is there something on my face? Did you hear me?” She briefly stopped her tangent when she felt a soft gaze.
“Oh~! No sorry,” You giggled
“I- just” you began barely above a whisper
“Wow, look!” Aeri unknowingly cut you off “Those ones look like two hearts about to mash together” she exclaimed giddily
Your gaze went back to the clouds and you paused for a few seconds causing Aeri to look at you
“Were you gonna say something?” She mumbled and you met her eyes
“I’m just.. Really happy right now!” you said, unable to verbalize the feelings you were having.
“I like her” you replied to your mom
“Ohh~”She nodded in response before genuinely inquiring “Why?”
“Well… She said I’m like her prince” she responded to her mother so nonchalantly and innocently
“Her prince?”
“Mhm, I think i’ll marry her one day” You smiled before picking up your pencil again-- completely unphased.
“Mm~ I see, I see. Well Y/n, does she want to marry you, too?”
“I don't know if she likes me too, but if she does I know she'll say when we’re ready!” She smiled brightly at her mom
“Ah okay~ When did you grow up my sweet daughter?” Your mom lightly pinched your cheek which caused you to giggle. “Well, I was on the phone with her mom earlier... Do you want to go on a date with her?"
Of course you excitedly nodded your head in agreement
You and Aeri stepped into the park, nature wrapped around you two like a comforting hug. The trees swayed gently in the breeze, their leaves left a playful pattern of light and shadows on the ground below. While birds chirped happily overhead, their songs blending with the soft rustle of leaves, creating a soothing melody that seemed to dance through the air. Both of your mom’s made their way to a nearby spot to watch you both
“Aeri! Let’s go” You said as you grabbed her free hand
“Oh~ Ma, can you hold these?” Aeri swiftly passed the small bouquet of flowers you had bought her to her mother before being whisked away by your eager pull
“Oh!” was all Mrs.Uchinaga could get out before the two of you ran off exploring the park. She couldn’t contain her laughter and began to take a digital camera out of her purse.
“They look good together, so happy huh?” Your mom glanced at Mrs.Uchinaga as she was snapping a picture of the two of you running hand in hand in the luscious green field.
“Yeah~ Aeri talks about Y/n a lot. She says she wants to marry her one day” Her mom let out an astonished laugh “When did our girls grow up?
“That’s exactly what Y/n said! “ She laughed, “We can’t be too surprised right?
"Ah~ I guess not." Aeri's mom began, "Remember that time we kept Y/n overnight once and Aeri was crying uncontrollably and then suddenly stopped? My god, it was so scary! I thought something had happened to her but when I checked the baby monitor, Y/n snuck out of her own crib and into Aeri’s! And then they fell asleep like that!” She laughed with a tinge of nostalgic sadness
“Ahh~ They were about two and a half years old huh? Oh~! Remember that time I told you when I put them in charge of her brother while I was making them lunch and when I walked back into the living room and found all of them asleep on the couch with Kosei in between them! It was so cute~!” Your mom smiled brightly “I have the photo somewhere still!”
Both you parents sighed contentedly, reminiscing on you two. After a bit of comfortable silence, you mom spoke up
“My Y/n cares about Aeri a lot. I can see she does too, it puts my heart at ease to know my daughter has someone who cares so deeply about her.” Your mom’s eyes began to get a bit watery
Mrs. Uchinaga placed her hand reassuringly over hers, a warm smile gracing her lips. "She's a smart girl—you shouldn’t worry too much. I'm forever grateful she's been in my Aeri's life. Look at them," she pointed affectionately at the two of you, nestled under the low-hanging branches of the weeping willow tree.
"Aeri! This is where we can take our shoes off," you exclaimed, gently parting the "curtain" of leaves as if entering a secret world.
Your imagination ran wild, the simple weeping willow tree transformed into a spacious apartment in a bustling city.
"And here is where our dining room is," Aeri chimed in, moving to the large stones and pretending they were seats. "Here, sit. Let me get you a coffee, honey," she playfully immersed herself in the game of house.
Aeri returned with a hollowed out rock with a stick in it, “Here’s your coffee!”
You pretend slurped through the stick straw, “This is soo~ delicious” and you fake slurped more causing both of you to giggle
“Hey, Aeri” you placed the rock coffee cup down and Aeri joined you at the “dining table”
“Where do you wanna live when you grow up?” you met her gaze
“Mmm, definitely a city. I want my fashion business to be very popular!” She flashed a cheerful thumbs up “What about you?”
“Mm..” You looked down, shyly contemplating
“Are you getting shy?!” She gently nudged your shoulder teasing you
“Nono~!” You waved your hands in defense while a smile appeared on your face “Hm.. I guess wherever you go?”
While you and Aeri played house, imagining your future together, your parents sat nearby on the park bench in comfortable silence, smiling as they watched the two of you. A gentle breeze drifted through, rustling the leaves and carrying the scent of blooming flowers through the air, adding to the peaceful moment.
“We’re moving soon,” Aeri’s mom finally said, breaking the quiet. Which explained why she asked to take them on a 'date'
Your mom didn’t respond right away, her gaze still on you and Aeri. After a few more beats, she spoke, doing her best to mask her emotions. “Oh… where?”
“South Korea,” Aeri’s mom replied softly.
Your mom paused, her voice steady but tinged with sadness. “Why leave everything behind?”
“There are better opportunities ahead than the ones we’ll leave behind,” Aeri’s mom answered with a quiet sigh, as if trying to convince herself as much as anyone else.
Later, on the car ride home, you and Aeri had both fallen asleep in the backseat, your hands still clasped together, oblivious to the change that was coming. Your mom glanced back at the two of you and with a bittersweet smile, she snapped a quick photo.
Neither of you knew how much your lives would change in the next few weeks.
You sat at your desk, your gaze unfocused as you stared blankly ahead, lost in a haze of thoughts that swirled around you like fog. Aeri’s voice cut through the noise, her laughter ringing out as she animatedly chatted with her friends nearby. Her vibrant energy filled the room, lighting up the space, yet somehow, it made the gap between you two feel even wider. You were in the same room, but it felt like you were worlds apart—both of you in your own little world.
"You're leaving?" one of her friends exclaimed, disbelief in her voice.
"Yeah!" Aeri replied, her excitement unmistakable.
"Never coming back?" another girl pressed, curiosity laced her voice.
"I don’t think so!" Aeri laughed, her tone light, almost carefree.
"What?! Why not!?" the girl pushed further, as if she couldn’t fathom the idea.
"Well.. I could never become a fashion designer here!" Aeri giggled, like her answer was obvious… like she wasn’t about to leave behind everything you had known together.
After school, you found yourself walking past Aeri as she waved her friends goodbye. Her cheerful farewell echoed behind you as you caught a glimpse of her. Her smile was as bright as ever, but for the first time, it felt distant—like it no longer belonged to you.
"Oh, bye!" she called out to her friends, her voice cheerful before turning her attention to you.
"Wait up!" she hurried to catch up with your steps.
You slowed down slightly, but something in you hesitated.
"Oh, sorry," you murmured.
She quickly caught up and the two of you began the familiar walk home, the silence between you felt heavier than ever. Aeri seemed comfortable, at ease with the quiet, but for you, the weight in your chest grew with every step. Even though she was right beside you, it felt like she was already slipping away—like an invisible wall was growing between you, expanding with each moment.
It was disorienting, jarring even, to think that after today, she wouldn’t be walking next to you every day like she had since kindergarten. Each footstep echoed what was coming, and despite the comfort of routine, the reality of her departure pressed down on you, suffocating the words you wanted to say but couldn’t find.
The world around continued its hustle and bustle, completely indifferent to the storm brewing in your heart. Cars rushed by, bikes whizzed past, and people hurried along the sidewalk, insensitive to the internal chaos you were grappling with.
Every emotion flooded through you, leaving you drowning in a mix of sadness and anger. Each step felt trudging through quicksand as if your feet had been stuck in concrete. Your body was subconsciously pulling you away from your house to prolong your inevitable separation– like a dog who doesn’t want their walk to be over yet.
As you reached the fork in the road that diverged toward your respective houses, a heavy cloud hung above your head, thick with everything you wanted to say.
"Bye, n/n," Aeri's voice carried a tinge of melancholy as she began to walk away, her figure receding into the distance.
You paused, unable to tear your gaze away from her retreating form.
Every memory you’ve shared with her played in your head like a movie montage.
“C’mon Aeri, don’t be scared! I’m right here with you!” You aggressively whispered while carrying a bag of snacks and a blanket, trying to convince Aeri onto the roof of your house
“What if we get in trouble? What if we get locked out and we’re stuck here forever!” Aeri said to you from inside through the opened window
“My parents know I do this, it’s a flat surface so you have to be a real dummy to slip off! And don’t worry, it only locks from the inside and if you’re scared you can just hold onto me!” You reached out your hand to Aeri
She couldn't help but smile, your own reassuring grin reflecting back at her. She warmly accepted your hand, her breath hitched when your hands made contact.
“O-oh thanks, let’s place the blanket down!” Aeri was glad it was dark because she was sure her face was the same shade as a tomato!
"Not too shabby, huh?" You chuckled lightly, settling onto the soft surface and patting the spot beside you, inviting her to join you.
It was a warm summer night. A gentle breeze wafted your scent of shampoo and a cologne-y scent from your deodorant. The sky stretched over both of you like a dark blue canvas with twinkling stars. The warmth of the evening wrapped the two of you into an embrace only you both could feel.
You felt her staring at you while you pointed out various constellations, your face lit up more and more each time you spotted one
“Hm, Aeri? Did you hear me?” You briefly stopped your tangent when you felt a soft gaze on you
“Oh~! No sorry,” Aeri giggled “What did you say?”
You scooted closer so your head was touching hers, “See those stars over there? It’s kinda like a weird looking 7?” You extended your arm while pointing, trying your best to point out three out of the millions of stars in the sky
“Hm.. oh! Yes!”
“That’s me! And your birthday is October 30 making you a Scorpio! and hmm” You began to move your pointer finger to search in the sky
“Ah! There! You see that pattern that kind of looks like a snake with claws?”
“Yeah~ I actually do!” Aeri giggled as her imagination took over
“Well, Aeri if you ever feel sad or something and I’m not with you for some reason ” You chuckled sweetly. “I just want you to know that we’re always together in the sky!” You both turned to meet each other’s gaze at the same time
“Well I don’t think we’ll ever get separated, I want to be with you forever!” She innocently beamed which caused you both to giggle
“Me too Aeri!”
After a few hesitant moments, you found your voice, though it felt as if your heart might stop with the effort.
“Aeri,” you called out softly, the word heavy with all the feelings you had kept buried for so long.
“Mm?” She turned to face you, her expression softening when her eyes met yours, and the cheerful energy from earlier was nowhere to be found.
“I.. I like you,” you said, your voice trembling slightly, but you held her gaze, resisting the urge to look away. You felt as though you might crumble, but you forced yourself to keep going. “I’m glad we spent our childhood.. together.”
Her smile faltered, shifting into something sadder, something that you couldn't understand. She didn’t respond immediately, as if the words you’d just said had stolen her breath, and for a moment, neither of you spoke. She was at a loss for words and the silence stretched endlessly between you.
You bit the inside of your cheek, trying desperately to maintain your composure. “Bye… Aeri,” you added softly, your voice cracking ever so slightly as you turned away towards your house, trying to put on a brave face.
You couldn’t bear to see the sadness in her eyes any longer. Tears threatened to spill, but you fought them back, willing yourself to hold on just a little longer.
“Bye..” she faintly whispered out
The moment you started walking toward your house, your chest tightened. Tears streamed down your face as the weight of the world as you knew it came crashing down.
What you'll never know and what you couldn’t see, was that Aeri began crying too.
About 10 years later, you sat at your desk in your cozy apartment room at UCLA, the late afternoon sun casting soft rays across the scattered textbooks and notes. With a sigh, you pushed some papers aside to rest your elbow on the desk, propping your chin on your hand.
“How the actual fuck do I even solve this?” you muttered to yourself, staring at the confusing statistics problem on your laptop. After a moment of frustration, you searched for a tutorial on YouTube, hoping for a miracle.
As you scrolled through the list of videos, you could hear your roommate Yunjin bustling around in the kitchen.
“Jennie-poo~!” you called out, leaning back in your chair. “Can you come here?”
A few seconds later, you heard your door creak open. "Huh?" came Yunjin's voice, her (dyed) red hair poking around the doorframe as she stepped inside.
“Do you have any idea how to solve this?” you asked, switching your browser back to the page filled with complex formulas. You pointed at the screen. “I seriously have no clue what they���re even fucking asking”
Yunjin leaned down, squinting at the problem for a moment before laughing. “Yeah, I’m gonna be honest with you—zero clue. You’re so fucked,” she said, still giggling.
Yunjin, aka Jennifer, was from upstate New York, and the two of you had been roommates for four years. It felt like fate sometimes—being assigned to live together your freshman year was totally random, but she was practically you in a different form.
“You’re absolutely no help,” you groaned, laughing a little despite yourself as you buried your face in your hands.
“You’re so welcome,” she said, patting your head playfully. “I’m gonna make some jjajangmyeon, do you want any?”
“Not right now. Maybe save some for me later? I gotta finish this shit” you replied, sitting back up and stretching.
“Yeah, of course. Good luck!” Yunjin said with a wink as she left your room.
You sighed deeply as you turned back to your YouTube tab, clicking on a video tutorial. As fucking expected, an ad began to play—one of those painfully long ones you couldn’t skip.
“Do you want to be a model? Do you think you have what it takes?”
The words faded into the background as your mind started to wander, pulled back by an unexpected memory.
Aeri.
It had been so long since you’d allowed yourself to think about her. Years, even. But something about the mention of fashion, pulled you back into the past. The past where she lived, where her dreams had once shone so brightly.
Aeri had always talked about becoming a fashion designer—about where she'd live and make a name for herself. You could still picture her so clearly, sitting beside you, messily sketching her ideas in her notebooks. Dresses, bags, runway looks… She used to tell you all about it, her eyes lighting up with excitement.
“I could never become a designer here,” she’d said once, laughing. She was always so sure of her path. Always ready to go after her dreams, no matter the cost.
She may have been right
Suddenly, the thought of her became overwhelming. You couldn’t help but wonder what had become of that dream. Did she make it? Was she in South Korea, living the life she’d always wanted? Or had things turned out differently?
Your fingers hovered over the keyboard as your mind drifted back to the memory of her laughter and the way she’d talked about her plans with ABSOLUTE certainty.
Without thinking, you opened a new tab. You hesitated for a moment, a tightness in your chest returning.
A memory flashed into your mind to when you were having a sleepover with her
“Y/n…” Aeri’s voice came softly from the left side of your bed, sadness creeping into her usual playful tone.
“Mm? What’s wrong?” you asked, glancing over at her.
“I wish you wanted to be a model,” she pouted. “Then you could try on the clothes I design.”
You laughed softly. “I mean, I still could... Why are you thinking about that now?”
“Well, obviously I want to be a designer! SO of course I want you to be the first person to wear the clothes I make,” she beamed, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
The video kept playing and the math tutorial began playing.
Why the hell am I thinking about that now? It’s been like 10 years?
Aeri Uchinaga…
You leaned back in your chair and positioned your head towards the ceiling
What are you up to…
With a sigh, you slingshotted forward and opened Facebook and began to search.
After an hour of searching, you finally found a lead—her father’s company page. It was a bit tedious to find her or her family, considering they lived in a completely different country.
“Hi, I’m looking for my childhood best friend, Aeri Uchinaga . Please let me know how I can contact her.”
And with that, you posted the message and, for the first time in hours, tried to return to your homework.
A few weeks later, on the complete opposite side of the world at 5:30 PM in Seoul...
Aeri sat in her dorm, the warm afternoon sunlight streaming through the window as she lounged on her bed, phone pressed to her ear, laptop resting in her lap.
“Ne~ umma, remember Xinyi? She plays basketball in college now!” Aeri said with a smile, scrolling through Facebook while chatting with her mother.
“Wow~! I’m not surprised,” Mrs. Uchinaga replied with a chuckle on the other end. “She was always knocking on our door, asking you to play.”
Aeri laughed lightly. “Yeah, even though I was pretty bad. She tried so hard to teach me, but I was just ass”
“It’s okay, darling. Sports weren’t really your thing,” her mother comforted warmly.
Aeri absentmindedly scrolled through her feed, clicking on old profiles and updates from people she hadn’t thought about in years.
“Who else should we look up?” She asked her mom.
Aeri paused, a small smile creeping onto her lips. “Who’s the one I had a huge crush on?”
“Y/n L/n” they both said at the same time, sharing a laugh.
Aeri’s fingers hovered over the keyboard, and she began typing your name, curiosity piqued as she searched for her old crush. As she clicked through posts, she suddenly froze.
“Umma! This is crazy!” Aeri exclaimed, her voice full of shock. “She posted on dad’s Facebook page a few weeks ago looking for me!”
“Oh wow really? Well~ I’m not too surprised, Aeri. She really liked you!” her mom replied, her voice filled with warmth.
“I’m looking for my childhood best friend, Aeri Uchinaga ...” Aeri read aloud to her mom as her eyes scanned the message.
Aeri’s heart raced as she scrolled through your profile. Even though your hair was longer and your features were more defined, the essence of you—the same joyful glint in your eyes—hadn’t changed at all. It was as if time hadn’t erased any part of the person she remembered so vividly.
“Umma, I’ll call you back,” Aeri said quickly, cutting her mom off as she reassured her with a chuckle, “Yes! I promise I’m eating well!”
She ended the call with a smile, but her pulse quickened as she stared at the screen. Her eyes scanned the message again and again, as if reading your name over and over would somehow make this more real.
“Ahh~” Aeri inhaled deeply, her fingers trembling slightly as she sent you a friend request and began typing a message to you.
“Y/n! It’s Aeri, you remember me?”
It was 1:30 AM in your on-campus apartment in LA when your phone buzzed, receiving the new message.
“Fuck her! She doesn’t deserve you! You’re like… sooo out of her league,” Yuna mumbled to your other friend, Ryujin, as she poured another shot for her.
“Right?” Ryujin sighed before pausing to take the shot. “I just don’t know why I miss her… so much,” she grimaced as the alcohol hit the back of her throat.
“Ryu, you should have some water,” you slurred, hiccuping as you passed her your water bottle.
“Y/nn~ how about you drink some water,” your roommate Yunjin chimed in, giggling as she slumped over on the couch.
The four of you sat in the living room, post-gaming the bar, waiting for your DoorDash to arrive. Ryujin rested her head in your lap, and without thinking, you rubbed her back to comfort her.
You took a long gulp of water with a satisfied “Ah~” before reaching for your beer.
“Wellll~ Beer is basically water. You should have some too Jennie-poo! It isn’t a post-game if we don’t drink till we die,” you exclaimed, taking a sip from the can.
“UGH~” Ryujin groaned, deadpanning, “I want to die~”
“Girl, she literally cheated on you and then wanted to be exclusive while she was fucking someone else—like, what?” Yuna added, deadpan.
That comment made all of you burst out laughing(she was right), even as Ryujin lightly punched Yuna in the arm.
“Hey~! Be niceeee~ Show some compassion!” Yunjin scolded, trying and failing to stifle her laughter.
You were still chuckling when your phone buzzed again in your pocket. Grabbing it, you blinked a couple of times, trying to focus your eyes on the notification.
Giselle?
Your vision was still a little too blurry to make sense of it.
"Hey!" Yunjin faked being cold
“You have a secret girlfriend or somethin'?” Yunjin teased, sounding just like a jealous girlfriend.
“Huh?” you responded, still distracted.
“Who’s messaging you at 1:30 in the morning? You have a sneaky link you’re not telling us about?” Yunjin continued, laughing.
Meanwhile, Ryujin was still moping in your lap. “Hey! Sensitive subject!” she groaned dramatically.
“Fuck if I know, I honestly have zero clue,” you mumbled, your words slurring as you stared at your phone before turning it off.
The next morning, you woke up in your bed with a slight headache. You groaned, rolling over to reach for your water bottle and chugged it like it was the last water on Earth.
The cold water worked its magic, refreshing you enough to (barely) function. You grabbed your phone from the charger and started scrolling through your notifications, still half-asleep. But then, one notification made you freeze—last night’s Facebook message.
You clicked on it, your grogginess instantly fading as your eyes widened in surprise. It was from none other than the girl who made you experience your first instance of love—Aeri Uchinaga.
“Giselle Uchinaga?” you muttered to yourself, reading her profile in disbelief.
That’s why you couldn’t find her! It made complete sense now. Her features were more mature, but that familiar smile—the one that had always warmed your heart—was still there, lighting up her face in every picture. You couldn’t stop smiling as you scrolled through her photos.
Just then, Yunjin’s voice broke through your thoughts, pulling you back to reality.
“Y/n! Are you awake? I made avocado toast and eggs!” she announced from the other side of your door.
“Ahh~ okay, yeah, lemme pee and I’ll be out!” you called back, your voice still raspy from sleep.
You quickly splashed some water on your face and pulled on a pair of sweats and a hoodie before stepping out of your room.
“Good morning!” you chirped, only to be met with a synchronized groan from Yuna and Ryujin.
“How the fuck do you have this much energy? What puts you in such a good mood?” Yuna asked, holding an ice pack on her forehead.
“Hm?” you replied, walking over to your coffee cup on the table that Yunjin had filled for you. “Thank Jennie-poo! And nothing, I just don’t have a massive hangover like you two idiots—should’ve drank beer instead of taking shots”
As you sipped your coffee, your mind of course, drifted back to last night. That damn text from Aeri.
The two of you exchanged a few quick messages, exchanging numbers, and catching up briefly before settling on a time that worked best for both of you to video call. It felt surreal, reading Aeri’s replies after all these years—like time had somehow folded in on itself, bringing the past back into the present.
You found yourself staring at your phone, the FaceTime app open and ready, but your heart pounding in your chest. What if things had changed too much? What if she wasn’t the Aeri you remembered? What if you weren’t the person she expected? Your thoughts spiraled as you adjusted your hair for what felt like the tenth time.
It’s just a call, you reminded yourself. It’s just Aeri. You’ve known her before.
But even though you’d told yourself that a hundred times, the butterflies in your stomach wouldn’t settle. The phone buzzed in your hand as the screen lit up. Incoming FaceTime: Aeri Uchinaga.
You took a deep breath, your thumb hovering over the screen for a moment longer than it should have. Then, finally, you swiped to answer.
Aeri’s face appeared, pixelated for just a second before the connection stabilized. There she was. Her familiar eyes, her smile—the same, but different? You stared at each other for a beat, neither of you quite sure how to start.
Aeri broke the silence with a nervous laugh. “Wow.. it’s been so long. I almost forgot what you looked like!”
You smiled, feeling the same rush of emotions you hadn’t felt in years. “I know right? I wasn’t sure what to expect either. You look… different. In a good way, of course.” nervousness still present in your voice
“Same to you,” Aeri said, her voice softening as she studied your face. “It’s like, you’ve changed, but... not really, you know?”
You laughed, the tension beginning to ease. “Except now you’re Giselle, huh?”
Aeri grinned, rolling her eyes playfully. “Yeah, that’s a long story. But trust me, it’s still me. Aeri Uchinaga at heart.”
You both chuckled, the ice slowly breaking as the conversation started to feel more familiar. It was strange, seeing her face again like this after so many years—older, more mature, but still with that same smile.
“Soo.. You’re really out there becoming a designer, huh?” you teased, shaking your head with an incredulous smile. “It’s kind of wild thinking about you... you know, living in Korea and actually doing all the things you told me you would like years ago”
Aeri laughed, her tone warm but modest. “Don’t let social media fool you. I’m not as glamorous as it seems. I’m still the same girl who couldn’t shoot a basketball to save her life.”
You grinned, shaking your head. “Oh god yeah! I remember! You were sooo bad. I thought for sure you were going to quit after that first fall.”
“Whatever! I literally was just trying to impress you,” she joked, her laugh lighting up the screen.
With each passing minute, the conversation felt easier. The laughter flowed naturally, memories of your childhood together resurfacing as if no time had passed at all.
“So... how have you been, really?” Aeri asked after a while, her tone more serious now. “I feel like I missed so much. of your life"
You nodded, the weight of the years between you sinking in. “Yeah, it feels strange, I feel the same too. I’ve been good, I guess. But seeing you like this… I dunno.. It feels like yesterday, you were just that little girl on the other side of the road from me.”
Aeri smiled, her expression softening. “Right? I don’t know, life is so weird sometimes.”
“Yeah,” you agreed, a small smile tugging at your lips. “And now, you’re the girl on my screen.”
As the night went on, you both talked about everything—your lives, your dreams, the things you had wanted to say but never got the chance to. It was like reconnecting with a part of yourself you thought you’d lost. By the end of the call, there was an unspoken understanding between you both. This wasn’t just a one-off conversation.
“So, let’s not wait another decade to do this again?” you said with a grin.
Aeri laughed. “Deal. Next time, I’ll tell you the full story behind ‘Giselle.’”
“I’m holding you to that, Aeri” you replied, your heart feeling lighter than it had in years.
And that’s how it was. For a few months, you both shared everything—your days, your worries, even the smallest details. You started waiting for her calls, looking forward to the time you’d spend talking. She was always there, her laughter filling your nights(and early mornings!), making you feel closer to her despite the distance.
It was almost as if you were in a relationship. The way she looked at you through the screen, the way your conversations lingered on hopes and what-ifs. You could almost imagine what it would be like to be with her again, for real.
You routinely called Aeri during your day.
Hey,” you greeted with a smile as the screen connected.
“Hey,” Aeri chuckled softly on the other end.
“Is it 7:00 in the morning there? I thought you said you never wake up before 10:00,” you teased, noting how early it was for her.
“I don’t,” Aeri replied, a smile tugging at her lips. “But this was the only time that worked for you, right?”
“Well yeah but don’t you have class today?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Yeahh~” she admitted, “but it’s later~” sleepiness still evident in her voice
You couldn’t help but tease her. “Ya know Aeri, your english is pretty rusty”
“Hey!” Aeri chuckled in return and her eyes opened slightly. “I only speak English with you and my mom!”
You both laughed yet some silence strung between the two of you
“So, you said you were leaving California to be the world’s greatest designer... You still want that?”
Aeri paused for a moment while shifting in her bed, then smiled. “Hmm... I think maybe I’ll have a business like.. My own line of clothes”
“Ahh wow~” You sighed, “ You’re the same Aeri I remember. Wanting to do everything, have everything and also still so sassy.” you teased again
She laughed, feigning shock. “Sassy? Wow, can’t believe you think of me like that”
Aeri’s grin widened before continuing, “Actually... I got invited to Japan this summer to design for this brand for a whole month. My professor helped me get into the program!”
“Wait, so you’ll be in Japan for a month?” you asked, surprised. “That’s amazing.”
“Yeah,” Aeri nodded, her excitement palpable. “It’s crazy. I can’t believe it’s happening.”
“So, how are your applications going?” she asked, her voice softening.
“Hmm, wellll~ they’re going,” you replied with a small smile. “I’m looking at Boston for grad school.”
Aeri sighed, a hint of nostalgia in her voice. “Ah wow, look at us.. when did we grow up? It feels like we’re almost... truly adults.”
“Hmm, I know,” you agreed, a thoughtful pause hanging between you. “Too soon though.”
You hung up shortly after and went about your day. You studied with Yunjin, and later, the girls came over for dinner, followed by a late-night study session. By the time you showered and finally settled into bed, it was already 1 AM when your phone buzzed—Aeri was calling.
“Hello?” You mumbled out as you turned your lamp on
“Oh sorry, were you sleeping?” she asked, her face slightly blurry on the screen.
“Mm,” you sighed softly, rubbing your eyes. “No, I just got into bed, actually.”
“Long day?”
“Mhm, but that’s alright. What’s up?” you asked, shifting into a more comfortable position and reaching for your glasses.
“I’m just.. in Haebonchang right now,” she said, flipping the camera to show the view. “Look how beautiful the sunset is, Y/n.”
The sunset was breathtaking, shades of pink, orange, and purple blending into each other like a painting across the sky.
“Wow... it’s beautiful, Aeri,” you said in awe.
Aeri’s voice softened before she flipped the camera back to herself. “Yeah... I wish you were here,” she said quietly, her eyes flickering between the camera and the fading light.
There was a pause, her words lingering in the space between you.
“Maybe one day.. We could go there together,” you whispered, your voice tinged with sadness.
“Yeah.. I’d really like that,” Aeri responded, her tone gentle but carrying the weight of something more.
There was a brief second of silence. As if both of you were hesitating to speak up.
“I miss you,” you whispered, barely audible, your voice filled with longing. Time zones didn’t matter, distance didn’t matter. You really just longed for Aeri.
Those three words heavily hung in the air between you two.
“I miss you too,” Aeri quietly admitted, her voice soft but sincere, resistance evident in her confession.
The day after that interaction, things started to feel different. The FaceTime calls slowly became more sparse, and her texts were less frequent. You tried not to overthink it, giving her the space you thought she might need. But as the days passed, the silence began to weigh on you. Eventually, you double texted her, unable to ignore any longer.
“Aeri, is everything okay?”
For the first time in days, her response came instantly.
“Yeah sorry, I’m okay. I just have something on my mind. Can we call later?”
Her words did nothing to ease your nerves.
“Of course,” you typed back, keeping it simple, though your heart raced.
The uncertainty gnawed at you, the anxiety tightening in your chest as you stared at the screen.
Finally, what felt like days but in reality was just a few hours, Aeri called you.
You hesitantly answered “Hey Aeri, you okay?”
There was a pause, and that’s when you knew it didn’t seem promising.
“Y/n,” she began softly, her face on the screen appearing hesitant, almost conflicted.
“..Aeri?” you prompted gently, your voice unsure now.
She sighed deeply, her gaze dropping for a second before meeting yours again. “Y/n… I need to talk to you about something.”
Your heart skipped a beat. “Yeah I know, what’s going on? You okay?”
“When is it possible for you to visit me in Seoul?” she asked bluntly, though her tone remained soft.
You hesitated. “Well, maybe about a year or so? Just with grad schoo–”
She cut you off gently, “I know.. You don’t have to explain yourself, I just– God,” She paused as if holding herself back from admitting something. “It’ll be over a year and a half until I can visit you”
Your eyes stayed glued to the screen, watching her struggle to compose herself. The pit in your stomach deepened
Aeri swallowed hard, clearly struggling with her next words. “I think we should stop talking for a while”
Your chest tightened.
“Why?”
“I came here..” She began, “ No– I’ve had this goal since forever. I want to accomplish something here but.. I can’t stop myself from looking up flights to California every day.
And I think… I think I need to focus on committing my life here”
You blinked, the realization slowly sinking in. She was leaving again.
“So you want.. to stop talking to me?” Your words trailed off, unsure of how to finish that thought or if there’s anything more you could possibly say.
“Just for now,” she said quietly, her eyes softening with what seemed like guilt. “And I really don’t want to lose you. But I know.. I have to give this my all.”
You bit your lip, trying to keep the lump in your throat from forming. “Aeri.. It took me 10 years to find you.”
She looked down again, exhaling slowly trying to fight a sob from coming out. “I know Y/n, but I’ll be back before you know it.. It’s just a brief break”
Fuck
You nodded slowly, though your heart ached. “Alright then Aeri ”
“I’m sorry.” Her voice was barely above a whisper now. “I’m so sorry” She began to cry.
“No need to be sorry,” You said as you choked back your own tears, clearing your throat to cover it. “We weren’t dating or anything so don’t worry about it. Really.”
There was a long pause, the silence between you filled with all the things neither of you were ready to say.
“Take care of yourself and good luck, okay?” Aeri said, her voice soft but final.
“You too,” you replied, your throat tight, the words barely escaping. “I’ll be right here.”
The call ended, and for the first time in months, the silence felt unbearable.
Aeri never knew that this was the hardest you cried in years.
Whoever said times heals everything, is a straight up liar. Time doesn’t heal, it just lets you get used to how things are now.
It had been about eight years since you had last spoken to her and honestly, you didn’t think much of Aeri anymore. Life had moved on, as it does. Although, there were days when you’d think back on everything but those thoughts were extremely rare now, fleeting, like a distant memory and it didn’t sting the way it used to. You’d convinced yourself that was just how things went. People come and go, and life moves forward whether you’re ready or not.
Once you graduated and started your new job in Boston not long after. You settled into a routine that felt strange at first but eventually became your new normal
Somehow, you managed to entice Yunjin to move to Boston. She had moved into a place not too far from yours with her (now!) fiance. Her sister also lives in Boston too so the transition wasn’t too hard. Yuna and Ryujin had ended up in New York, so weekends/every other weekend often meant catching a train to visit them or planning get-togethers whenever everyone’s schedules aligned.
Your 9-to-5 job wasn’t glamorous, but it was steady—something you could rely on. You fell into the rhythm of it quickly enough. The crowded subway rides during rush hour, the packed streets of Boston, the distant hum of the city became part of your daily routine. You’d slip into your office, get your work done, and slip out at the end of the day. It wasn’t what you imagined back when you were chasing dreams in California, picturing something a little more exciting, maybe a little more daring. But it wasn’t bad either—it was.. just comfortable.
After work, you'd sometimes grab a drink with coworkers or meet up with the woman you’d met shortly after getting into grad school. There was nothing too serious between the two of you, just the occasional dinners or casual hangouts. She was fun to be around—easygoing, good company, someone you could relax with. You’d meet up after work at a bar downtown, sharing a drink and small talk about your days. Or sometimes, you’d catch a movie or grab takeout, sitting side by side on the couch in her small apartment, talking about work or random things that made you laugh.
It wasn’t the life-altering-head-over-heels kind of thing, but it felt normal, almost comforting. There was no pressure to be anything more than it was or used to be, and that was fine with you both. Life had settled into place without much fanfare, a quiet routine that you didn’t mind..
It wasn’t until one quiet evening, after a long day at work, that something finally disrupted your routine. You were sitting on the couch, nursing a beer, and scrolling through your phone without much thought, letting the noise of the day slowly fade away.
That was until a notification lit up your screen. You glanced at it out of habit, not expecting anything important. But the name made you pause.
Aeri Yizhuo.
Who?
Aeri…?
Your heart skipped a beat as recognition clicked into place.
Oh, for fuck’s sake.
For a second, your heart skipped a beat. You stared at the message, the familiar feeling creeping back into your chest, one you hadn’t felt in ages. You hadn’t thought of her in so long, and yet, there she was. After all this time.
And then, the truth hit you like a punch to the gut.
Aeri was married now.
You felt the sting of it, sharp and unexpected, cutting deeper than you would’ve liked to admit. It shouldn’t have hurt this much. You hadn’t thought about her in so long as you knew she’d been building a life in Korea. You had moved on! Or at least, that’s what you told yourself.
But here she was, after all these years she still had the ability to make you feel something. A feeling couldn’t quite put your finger on.
After all this time, part of you had still hoped for something. For something more than this.
About a month or two after your surprise catch-up with Aeri, you finally decided it was time to visit her. The timing was perfect—it was the end of the fiscal year, and you had some extra days off to use. You figured, why not? It would be a good vacation right? The thought of seeing her after all this time felt surreal, but exciting in a way you couldn’t quite describe. You’d booked your flight, set to leave next weekend so you and your friends decided to meet this weekend.
"So," Yunjin piped up, setting down her shot glass with a grin, "Why are you going to Korea?" You, Yunjin, Yuna, and Ryujin were all seated in Yunjin and Kazuha's shared apartment, a half-empty bottle of vodka in the middle of the table while your beer cans scattered around your side.
"She's going to see that girl, rememberrr?" Ryujin teased, her tone playful.
"Who?" you replied, pretending not to know who she was talking about.
Ryujin rolled her eyes, clearly not buying it. "Don't play dumb, idiot. You know exactly who I'm talking about—your first love, right? I thought she lives there, doesn't she?"
"Oh, I see how it is," Yuna chimed in with a smirk. "You just broke up with your girlfriend so you could go see her, huh? You dog"
"What! I’m going for vacation," you exclaimed, shaking your head. "And plus, you guys are crazy. She's married now."
"WHAT? Seriously?" Yunjin blurted out, her voice incredulous.
"Mhm," you nodded, your tone more casual now though it stung to admit it. "For like five or six years now"
You couldn’t even bring yourself to feel bad about it. After all, from your previous conversation with Aeri, it was clear how happy she was. She’d met her wife, Ning Yizhou, during her design trip in Japan. Aeri had described Ning as an absolutely beautiful soul, someone kind and supportive. They both work together now, running Aeri’s business, Giselle.
From the way Aeri spoke about Ning, you could hear the genuine love and admiration in her voice. There was no bitterness in your heart—how could there be? You were happy for her, happy that she had found someone who brought light into her life, someone who shared in her dreams.
In fact, you were proud of her. She really did accomplish everything she had set out to do. It was bittersweet, of course, but you were genuinely happy for her.
That’s all that mattered.
Right?
You stood just outside of Incheon International Airport, the thick scent of rain mingling with the smoke from your cigarette as you waited for your Uber. The weather had suddenly turned gray the second you had landed, casting a quiet gloom over the city, the kind that sinks into your bones(What a great sign, huh?). Raindrops softly patterned on the sidewalk while you took another slow drag, the smoke curling up into the damp air.
The second you crushed the cigarette beneath your shoe and bent over to pick it up, a car pulled up in front of you, headlights cutting through the misty rain. You quickly threw it in the appropriate spot in the trash can and opened the back door, climbing in with a sigh.
“Annyeonghaseyo~,” you greeted the driver in your best (broken) Korean, trying to remember the phrases you had studied years ago for Aeri.
The driver smiled politely in the rearview mirror, his eyes crinkling with amusement. “Ah, I also speak English. Are you going to the hotel?”
You felt your cheeks flush slightly, nodding as you let out a small, relieved laugh, “Yes, please!” lowering your head in a polite bow.
The car slipped into the rainy Seoul night, the city lights blurring through the raindrops on the windows. The sound of rain hitting the roof of the car was soothing. Your eyes traced the streets as you drove deeper into the heart of the city. The roads were wet and glistening, the neon signs reflecting off the slick pavement, painting the night in hues of red, blue, and green.
The drive felt longer than it was, the beautiful city of Seoul was a lot to take in. Finally, you pulled up to the front of your hotel, the bright lights of the entrance cutting through the rain. The driver helped you with your bags, and you handed him some Won with a shy bow and a “gamsahamnida,” before heading inside.
Checking in was a blur of polite smiles and hurried conversations with the hotel staff. Before you knew it, you were standing in your empty room, the door clicking shut behind you with a finality that made the space feel even bigger.
The rain had picked up, drumming harder against the window. You crossed the room slowly, setting your bag down by the bed before making your way to the large floor-to-ceiling window that overlooked the city. The lights of Seoul stretched out before you, and they were incredibly bright.
A reflection of your younger self flickered in the glass, dim and blurred by the raindrops. It was as if your inner child was staring right back at you—smiling brightly in those stupid colorful shorts your Mom loved to dress you in with a big toothy grin stretching across your face.
As quickly as she appeared, she vanished. Then reflected back was an almost unrecognizable adult. It was you. The light in your eyes was still prevalent, but it just wasn’t as bright as it used to be. Years must have dimmed that spark and softened the edges of the person you once were.
You leaned your forehead against the cool glass, watching as your breath fogged up the window. The city below pulsed with life, its bright lights and movement carrying on unaware of your inner turmoil.
In that moment, surrounded by the bright lights of a city that was so beautiful and full of life.
You had never felt more alone.
Some bridges in Korean folklore represent reunion and enduring love, like the Magpie Bridge, where separated lovers meet once a year to reaffirm their bond. Others, however, represent a fleeting reconnection—brief moments that can’t last, like this one.
The next morning, you got ready and made your way to Seonyudo Park Bridge, a location Aeri had sent you earlier. The sky wasn’t rainy (luckily) and the soft hum of the city seemed distant as you stood at the edge of the bridge, anxiously watching pedestrians and tourists bustle around. Snippets of Korean and bits of broken English floated past you as you nervously fidgeted with the strap of your tote bag.
You shifted your weight, glancing around, when a voice called out, one you hadn’t heard in person in years.
“Y/n!”
Your head instinctively turned.
Suddenly, in front of you stood a child. She wore jean shorts, a Hello Kitty shirt, and had medium length black hair. Her smile was bright, lighting up her entire face, and her eyes sparkled with a familiar excitement.
It was a smile you could recognize anywhere.
For a moment, you were transported back in time. There she was—Aeri, as you remembered her as a child, standing on the other side of the bridge. You froze, staring in disbelief as the vision of her younger self ran toward you, wide-eyed and full of life. It felt so real—the way she moved, the way her smile hadn't changed.
But then you blinked, and the vision vanished and adult, present time Aeri was just walking toward you. She looked different—grown up. Her hair had grown longer, her figure more filled in, and her features had sharpened with time. But that damn smile, the way her eyes crinkled in the corners when she smiled, was exactly the same as you remembered it from 20 years ago.
Without thinking, your body moved on its own, a shy yet goofy smile creeping across your face as you walked toward her. Your strides were longer, more eager, and you met her about three-quarters of the way across the bridge. You met her where she was.
Now standing just a foot apart, neither of you spoke at first. You both stood there, taking each other in, as if afraid to break the fragile moment. Aeri was still shorter than you by a couple of inches, and she was dressed in a sleek black leather jacket with gray slacks that made her look effortlessly beautiful.
You looked down at her, your heart racing, and for a few seconds, the world around you seemed to fade away. The silence between you wasn’t awkward—it was heavy, but not uncomfortable. It was the weight of everything left unsaid, everything that had built up over the years.
Finally, Aeri sighed softly, her eyes locked on yours, and a smile tugged at her lips. “Wow~,” she whispered, looking up at you with a mix of awe and warmth.
She surprisingly embraced you in an unexpected hug. Your hands hovered, ghosting across her sides.
“I missed you” She muffled out on your shoulder
You didn’t respond.
You both pulled back from the hug, standing there, just staring at each other. There was something almost surreal about it—the way you both remembered each other so clearly, yet in this moment, you felt like strangers, familiar but somehow unrecognizable.
“You look amazing,” you croaked out, your voice betraying the flood of emotions. “You’ve changed but... you haven’t? If that makes sense.” A nervous laugh escaped your lips.
Aeri lowered her head, letting out a soft, breathy chuckle. “I could say the same to you... When did you get so tall?”
You shyly smirked “I think you’ve just always been short.”
“Ah~ so you haven’t changed at all. Still so~ annoying,” she teased, her laugh infectious.
The laughter faded, and a comfortable silence settled between you both as you took each other in again, the weight of time pressing gently on the moment.
“So...” Aeri smiled, her eyes crinkling at the corners. “You wanna go? I’ve got a few places planned for us.”
“Yeah, of course. Let’s go,” you replied, and without another word, you followed Aeri much like a dog
The Han River has long been a symbol of flow, change, and life in Korea. Flowing water symbolizes the constant change in ones life.. they’re moving in different directions, but still connected in some way.
The walk wasn’t far, but neither of you spoke at first. Aeri led the way and you followed, both of you too shy to break the silence. Finally, she guided you to a quiet spot near the bank of the Han River, the water glistening under the dim light of the overcast sky.
“How’s here?” Aeri finally spoke, settling down near the water’s edge.
“Mmm,” you murmured, nodding as you sat beside her. The lush grass below you.
You both sat quietly, watching the water, the silence growing heavier with unsaid words.
“Was the last time we talked really eight years ago?” Aeri sighed, breaking the silence again.
“I think so? We’re 30 now... So, yeah, I guess it was,” you said, turning your head slightly toward her. “Feels weird huh?” You gave her a little half smile.
“Wow...” she whispered, her voice carrying the weight of those lost years.
After a brief pause, she added, “You know.. before I got married, I went to New York with my wife.”
“I know.”
“I sent you a message on Facebook, I didn’t know if you had changed your number” she continued, smiling softly but with a hint of sadness in her eyes. “But you didn’t respond”
There was another pause. It felt like she had more to say, so you stayed quiet, waiting.
“I wanted to see you,” she admitted quietly. “I was disappointed.”
“I’m sorry,” you said, your gaze fixed on the water, avoiding her eyes. There wasn’t much else you could say, something was hanging in the air between you.
Aeri shifted, her tone changing slightly. “Well, I also wanted to meet your girlfriend. How are you guys doing?”
“We’re not together right now,” you admitted.
“Oh, I’m sorry... I didn’t mean to— wait, did you break up?” she asked, concern lacing her voice.
“Oh well no, I don't know, we’re just... in a weird spot right now. She wants to get married but...”
“But you don’t?” Aeri asked, cutting through your hesitation.
“Yeah it's just, I don’t know, it’s just... complicated,” you sighed, trying not to reveal too much, keeping your emotions in check.
“What’s complicated?” she pressed, her voice direct, almost matter-of-fact.
You chuckled lightly at her tone. “I’m still paying off my student loans. I just don’t want my wife to carry that burden, you know? Boston is expensive enough as it is...” It wasn’t entirely a lie. But deep down, you knew there was more to your hesitation than just the financial part.
“I just feel like she deserves someone better than me. We’ve been together but.. not really together for so long... She deserves someone who can give her what she wants. Someone... less ordinary and..”
“Ordinary?” Aeri interrupted softly, her voice filled with disbelief. “You’re far from ordinary, Y/n. You know you’re...” she trailed off, as if catching herself before saying too much.
You gave her a small smile, ignoring her hesitation. It was clear neither of you wanted to dig into old feelings, not yet, maybe even never. There was too much that both of you were avoiding.
“So, how’s work?” you asked, gently steering the conversation away from the tension that had built up. The question felt like a safe place to land, something casual and mundane.
Aeri smiled, seeming to relax a little. “Busy, as always. Giselle’s doing well, though. It’s everything I dreamed of... and more stressful than I imagined.”
“That sounds about right,” you chuckled, the heaviness between you starting to ease. “But, I knew you could do it. I’m really proud of you, Aeri.”
Slowly, the awkwardness began to dissipate. You found yourselves laughing about silly memories from when you were younger, filling in the gaps from the eight years you had missed.
Aeri told you about the ups and downs of her business, her wife, her travels, and the unexpected ways life had changed her. You shared stories of grad school, your friends, your job, and the quiet moments of your own life that had shaped you. It was easy to get lost in the rhythm of it, the back and forth, as though no time had passed at all.
Before you knew it, the sun had started to dip, casting soft shades of pink and orange across the sky. .
“Remember that one time when you fe–”
Your stomach grumbled loudly, cutting through Aeri’s story
“Oh my god, are you hungry?” Aeri’s eyes widened with concern.
Oh, no I’m fine, really!” You tried to assuage but of course she did not relent
“No it’s okay, I could eat too. Let’s go get some food, there’s a great to-go spot nearby, and then I’ve got one more place I want to show you.”
She was already on her feet, tugging at your sleeve before you could even think to protest. Not that you would, of course.
You chuckled softly, offering a simple, “Alright,” as a smile crept onto your face. It just felt so natural. Aeri was still the same, always charging ahead, her excitement infectious, leading you from behind as she had so many times before.
Some things really never change.
Soon, you both arrived at a cozy 24-hour convenience store, the kind that makes it fresh right there. It was small and tucked away, but the smell of freshly made meals greeted you the moment you stepped inside. You ordered an onigiri, feeling like that’s all your stomach could handle after such a day like this.
You unwrapped it and took a bite, savoring the simple comfort of the food, but before you could settle in, Aeri was pulling you along again, her food in hand, excitement bubbling in her voice.
“Let’s go, the bus comes in three minutes!” she said, glancing at her phone with a grin.
You both made it onto the bus(after scarfing down your rice ball) barely just in time. With no seats available, you were left standing together, holding the same pole.
Strangers pressed in around you, the sounds of conversation and the hum of the city filling the space. But in that moment, it felt like it was only the two of you in the world.
Your fingers brushed against each other, but neither of you moved. The silence stretched between you, not awkward, just heavy with all the years missed.
You met Aeri’s gaze, and for a brief second, it felt like time slowed.
The bus glided (not) smoothly through the city streets, and yet the tension between you was almost tangible. Your mind raced with everything you wanted to say, but none of the words seemed right.
"Ae—" you started to say, but before the words could form, Aeri cut you off softly.
“Oh, we’re here,” she said, her voice gently pulling you both back into the present moment.
The bus came to a stop, and you followed her out, stepping into the cool evening air. The two of you walked side by side, the quiet comfort between you settling in again as you made your way toward Namsan Tower, known for its Love Lock Bridge.
“Do you want a picture?” Aeri asked, breaking the silence. “It is your vacation, right? I feel like you haven’t taken many pictures while you’ve been here. Probably my fault,” she laughed lightly, her tone warm.
“Oh yeah, sure!” you said, handing her your phone.
You posed in front of a scenic spot along the path, flashing your signature bright smile.
“Ah~ so cute,” she teased, snapping a few photos before handing your phone back to you.
“Thanks,” you said, quickly glancing at the picture before slipping the phone into your pocket.
The two of you continued walking, your shoulders brushing against each other now and then as the foot traffic toward the bridge picked up. Just before you reached the bridge, Aeri stopped in her tracks, turning to you with a serious look.
“Y/n,” she said, her voice soft but steady.
“Hmm?” you looked at her curiously.
“Why did you... search for me?” she asked quietly, her gaze lingering on you.
“Eight years ago?” you finished for her.
“Mhm,” she nodded.
“Do you really want to know?” you asked, meeting her eyes. She gave a small nod in response, waiting.
You took a deep breath, searching for the right words. “I wanted to see you again... I don’t know. You left so suddenly, and I guess I was a little pissed off, honestly.”
“I’m sorry,” Aeri said softly.
You let out a small huff of laughter. “Why are you apologizing?”
“I guess... you’re right. I don’t have anything to be sorry for,” she admitted, smiling faintly.
“You were just in my entire life, and then you left... and then, bam, I found you again,” you said, the words coming out more candidly than you expected.
“Why would you do that?” she asked, her voice carrying a hint of vulnerability.
“I don’t know, honestly... You kept entering my mind when I was in college. I thought about you... a lot,” you admitted.
Aeri nodded, her expression softening. “I see.”
“We were babies back then, huh?” you chuckled, the tension easing. “And even eight years ago... we were still figuring things out.”
“Yeah,” Aeri smiled, a bittersweet glint in her eyes. “I can’t believe we’re not ‘babies’ anymore.”
You both finally arrived at the Love Lock Bridge, the sky now a deep shade of blue, illuminated by the city lights below. The bridge was alive with the soft hum of conversations you couldn’t quite understand and the distant sounds of traffic, but you felt a quiet stillness between you and Aeri walked around.
“Ning and I came here for our anniversary,” Aeri said, her voice almost wistful as she glanced around. “It was hard to find at first. We spent months looking for the perfect spot to place our lock.”
She started scanning the rows upon rows of locks, her fingers brushing over the cold metal as she looked for hers. But while she was focused on finding it, you couldn’t stop staring at her—the way her hair fell over her face as she leaned in, the subtle concentration etched on her features, the soft smile that tugged at her lips every now and then as she searched.
You knew you should probably be at least trying to help her, but at this moment, it felt like she was a world away, even as she stood right next to you. She was talking about their anniversary, their love, and you couldn’t shake away the sinking feeling.
Then suddenly, She spotted it. A small, worn lock with their names etched in faded letters. Ning and Aeri. She pointed at it.
“There,” she said softly.
Your eyes followed your finger, and she smiled when she saw it.
“Wow... I didn’t think we’d be able to find it.”
You forced a smile, but the heaviness in your chest lingered. After a few moments of small talk about the lock, the conversation lulled, and Aeri checked the time. The soft glow of the city lights and the quiet hum of the evening reminded you both that this reunion, like everything, had to come to an end.
“I should probably head home,” Aeri said quietly, her voice carrying a hint of reluctance. She didn’t want to break the moment, but it was inevitable.
You nodded, your own smile fading. “Yeah, I should get back too.”
Home. She was going home to someone—to a life that didn’t include you. And as much as you tried to push the thought aside, it stung.
She walked with you toward the bus stop, in silence. The conversation from earlier echoed in your mind—how you had found her again, only to realize that the distance between your lives was now undeniable.
When the bus pulled up, Aeri watched as you stepped inside. She gave you one last, soft smile, the kind that carried more meaning than any words could, just before the doors closed between you.
You said your quiet goodbye, instead of walking her home like you used to, you headed back to your own place. Alone.
The next day arrived with a clearer sky, though the weight of the previous night still lingered faintly in your chest. You weren’t sure how to feel, but Aeri’s early morning text had a way of pulling you out of your thoughts: “Let’s go to Seoul Tower today! I feel like everyone who visits needs to see it.”
Of course you agreed, a few hours later when you had checked out of your hotel, you found yourself walking toward one of Seoul’s most famous places, N Seoul Tower, with Aeri by your side. The streets were alive with locals and tourists, bustling around market stalls and snapping photos.
There was a vibrant energy of the city surrounding you, but your focus was on Aeri, who was as animated as ever, pointing out landmarks and sharing random facts about the places you passed. It was cute.
“This place is sooo a must for anyone visiting Seoul,” Aeri said with a grin as you passed a shop offering hanbok rentals. “Wanna try one on?” She teased “Or are you more in the mood for food?”
You bantered back. “Let’s try food first. I don’t think I’m ready for a hanbok yet,” you playfully rolled your eyes
You stopped at a food stall, grabbing some hotteok, tteokbokki, and grilled meat skewers.
“You have to try this. It’s my favorite,” she said, handing you a cup of hotteok, her face lighting up as you took a bite of the warm treat “See?! I knew you’d like it.”
The day moved quickly as you wandered through the crowded streets, snapping photos, enjoying the ‘touristy’ vibe. It felt easier, lighter, as if you could both escape into the city, even if just for a while.
As the sun began to set, casting a warm golden hue over the city, Aeri led you to the top of N Seoul Tower. From the observation deck, you could see all of Seoul stretched out before you. The view was breathtaking, the city bathed in the soft light of the sun.
“This city... it’s strange how much it’s become home,” Aeri said quietly, her voice softer now. She leaned against the railing, staring out at the skyline. “I never thought I’d feel that way when I first moved here.”
You stood beside her. “It’s beautiful,” you said, your own voice hushed, as if speaking too loudly might break the delicate moment. You stared at her as she gazed out over the city, your mind was elsewhere.
For a while, you both stood in silence, taking in the view. In that moment, it didn’t matter where you had come from or where you were going.
For now, this was enough.
After spending the day embodying a tourist and such, the sun had long set, and the once-bustling streets now felt quieter as you followed Aeri back to her apartment.
You were nervous of course,
“She knows I’m coming. right?” you asked, pausing mid-step.
“Of course,” Aeri replied, leading you up the steps to her apartment—the place she now called home.
As you entered, Aeri's wife, Ning, was already by the door. You weren’t sure what you had expected, but seeing her in the flesh felt surreal, like a final confirmation of the life Aeri had built without you. It felt like the gap between your past with Aeri and her present had suddenly become tangible.
After a brief moment of silence, you gave Ning a polite bow, offering your best attempt at broken Korean. “Annyeonghaseyo,” you said, smiling awkwardly.
Ning returned the gesture with a polite bow of her own. “Hello,” she responded in careful English.
For a second, both of you stood there, staring at each other incredulously, trying to find the right words, the weight of the moment hanging between you.
You nodded, your heart racing slightly. “It’s nice to meet you,” you added, this time in your most broken Korean.
Ning smiled kindly, understanding the effort you were making. “It’s nice to meet you too,” she said
Ning chuckled softly, the slight language barrier immediately apparent but not uncomfortable. “Aeri told me… a lot about you.” she responded in English
“Likewise”
Aeri came to your side, sensing the mix of emotions swirling in the air. “Ning, should we grab something to eat? She’s leaving later tonight, so I think we should eat,” Aeri said in Korean, but you didn’t quite catch the words.
Ning nodded and turned to you, switching back to English. “What do you like to eat?”
You pondered for a moment, thinking of something simple but satisfying. “Hmm… samgyupsal?”
Ning’s face immediately lit up at the mention of her favorite food. “Let’s go get samgyupsal!” she said, her excitement evident.
You three ended up at a cozy late-night bar and restaurant, the soft hum of conversation and clinking of glasses filling the space. Dinner had gone smoothly, the samgyupsal hitting the spot, and now you were all nursing drinks, passing time until your Uber was set to arrive.
“So, have you traveled out of the United States before?” Ning asked in Korean, her expression curious. Of course, you didn’t understand, but Aeri leaned in, her voice low as she translated.
“She’s asking if you’ve been out of the country before,” Aeri said with a small smile, eyes flicking between you and her wife.
You shook your head with a soft laugh. “I’ve been to Japan and Spain before, but I think Korea has been my favorite so far.”
Aeri translated the words, and Ning nodded with a smile.
“She says Seoul is a good place to start when visiting Korea, but if you come back, you should visit Jeju Island. It’s beautiful there,” Aeri translated again, while Ning added in her own bit in Korean, her face lighting up.
“I’ve heard great things about Jeju,” you said, returning the smile. “Maybe next time.”
The small talk flowed easily enough, but as the night wore on, Aeri slowly stopped translating, and Ning sat quietly, sipping her drink. It created an odd dynamic—one where it felt like Aeri was caught between two worlds, and Ning, though polite, was drifting further into her own thoughts.
You couldn’t help it. With the drinks loosening your tongue and emotions swirling inside you, the words began to spill out. Leaning in slightly, you lowered your voice, careful to keep your tone steady. “Aeri… thanks for introducing me to your wife.”
Aeri blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift in conversation. “Mm,” she mumbled, her gaze flickering between you and her drink, unsure of where you were headed.
“I can tell she really loves you,” you added softly, the sincerity in your voice clear. "I didn't realize liking your wife would hurt this much."
Aeri’s eyes softened, her brow furrowing slightly. “Really?” she asked, her voice almost hesitant, as if she needed confirmation.
“Of course,” you replied, your words gentle, but heavy with the weight of what you weren’t saying.
A moment of silence passed, the sounds of the bar fading into the background as the two of you sat there, the space between you filled with things that had been left unsaid for too long.
You took a sip from your glass, gathering the courage to speak again. “… When we stopped talking back then… I really missed you. Did you miss me?”
The question hung in the air, heavy and raw, as if you’d been holding it in for years.
Aeri’s gaze dropped for a moment, her fingers tracing the rim of her glass. When she finally looked up at you, her voice was softer, almost vulnerable. “Of course I did, Y/n.”
A dry laugh escaped your lips. “But you met your wife then.” There was an edge to your voice, a bitterness that surprised even you.
Aeri responded instantly, almost defensively. “And you had a girlfriend.”
You scoffed softly. “Right,” you murmured, shaking your head with a small smile. “Sorry.”
Aeri fidgeted with the rim of her glass. “It’s okay.”
After a few quiet moments, you exhaled, the weight of your thoughts pressing down on you. The words slipped out before you had the chance to stop them. “Seeing you again… it’s made me have some strange thoughts.”
Aeri lifted her eyes to yours, her gaze gentle but curious. “What kind of thoughts?” she asked softly.
You hesitated, your fingers tracing the rim of your glass as you searched for the right words. “I keep thinking… what if I had come here eight years ago? What if you never left California? If we’d just grown up together, stayed in each other’s lives…”
You paused, the questions swirling in your mind before you continued, your voice growing softer. “Would I have still searched for you? Would we have dated? Broken up? Gotten married and had kids? Just.. you know, stuff like that.”
You glanced at Aeri, her expression unreadable as she absorbed everything you said.
“And what I’ve realized,” you continued, almost to yourself, “is that California… it was always too small for your ambition. You outgrew it before either of us realized. I’m happy you moved here, Aeri, I really am.
And the truth is, I liked you because you’re you. And who you are…” You trailed off for a moment, letting the words sink in before you finished quietly. “Who you are is someone who leaves.”
Aeri’s lips parted slightly, her breath catching. She looked away for a second, as if trying to gather her thoughts, before her voice came out in a whisper. “The Aeri Uchinaga you remember… she doesn’t exist anymore.”
Her words cracked slightly, as if admitting it to herself for the first time.
You felt a soft chuckle escape you, one tinged with understanding. “I know,” you replied. “I know.”
She nodded, but quickly added, “But… that doesn’t mean she never existed.” Her eyes met yours again, softer now. “I left that version of me behind 20 years ago. I left her with you.”
Her words, the honesty in them, tugged at something deep within you. “I know,” you repeated, meeting her gaze, a strange sense of peace settling over you. “I know we were only twelve… but I really did love her.”
Aeri’s lips curved into a small, sad smile, the kind that holds years of unspoken truths. “I know,” she said, her voice barely a whisper. “You’re crazy, you know that?”
You both let out a quiet laugh, the sound soft but comforting, a brief return to the simplicity of who you used to be.
“I think we must’ve been something together in our past lives,” she said after a while, her voice distant, thoughtful. “Otherwise, why would we be here together right now?”
You thought about her words, turning them over in your mind. “I agree,” you finally said. “But in this life… we obviously just aren’t those people to each other, are we? We’re finally in the same city for the first time in 20 years, and here we are, sitting together... with your wife.”
Your expression softened, as you quietly acknowledged the truth you both knew. “To Ning, you’re someone who stays,” you whispered.
A few moments of silence passed between you and Aeri.
“Who do you think we were to each other in our past lives?” Aeri asked suddenly, her voice soft, almost wistful.
You tilted your head, considering the question. “Hmm… I don’t know,” you said, your tone thoughtful. “Maybe we were forced into a political marriage to stop a war…Or maybe we were just two strangers on a bus who happened to sit next to each other. Or even.. maybe I was just a branch you decided to sit on as a bird on a cold morning.”
You and Aeri chuckled at that, though you could sense a sadness behind it.
You both sat in the quiet for a few more moments, the weight of those imagined lives lingering in the air, until Aeri excused herself to use the restroom, leaving you alone with Ning.
You turned toward her, feeling guilty for the past hour. “I’m sorry we spoke alone,” you said gently, your voice low. “It won’t happen again.”
Ning gave you a small, gentle smile, though there was something sad in her eyes. “Don’t worry,” she replied, her English hesitant but kind. “You two haven’t seen each other in a while. I’m glad I got to meet you Y/n.”
You nodded, her response easing some of the tension in your chest. “I’m glad too,” you said softly, offering her a smile in return
When Aeri returned, you paid the bill and the three of you made your way back to the apartment to grab your luggage. The atmosphere had shifted slightly—quiet, but not uncomfortable, just the natural stillness that follows the end of a long day.
“Hey, I’m gonna walk her to her Uber,” Aeri said to Ning, offering her a small, reassuring smile before turning toward you and the door.
You paused for a moment, glancing at Ning. Bowing slightly, you tried your best to piece together the Korean you’d practiced. “Nice to meet you. Come visit me in California.”
Ning’s eyes softened, and despite the awkwardness of the language barrier, her warmth was undeniable. She returned the bow, her own English just as halting but genuine. “Definitely,” she replied, her smile sincere. You offered her a small smile in return before following Aeri out the door.
As you and Aeri stepped out of the apartment, the cool night air hit you both. You walked side by side down the quiet street, neither of you saying much, both lost in your own thoughts.
The streets were dimly lit, the distant hum of the city lingering in the background. Every now and then, your shoulders brushed, but neither of you acknowledged it.
As you neared the end of the street, where your Uber was set to pick you up, you both stopped, standing under a flickering streetlight. The quiet air felt thick, the weight of the goodbye neither of you wanted to acknowledge.
Aeri shifted slightly, glancing at you before looking away, her hands fidgeting in her jacket pockets. “Will it be here soon?” she asked, her voice soft, trying to smooth over the tension between you.
You glanced at your phone, the screen glowing back at you. “Two minutes,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.
Silence.
Some more silence fell between you two as the night deepened, the distant sounds of the city humming softly around you. Neither of you made any effort to fill the quiet, as if both afraid that words would shatter whatever remained between you.
Finally, the low rumble of a car pulling up signaled that your time was almost up. You glanced at the Uber, then down at your bags. With a sigh, you began to pack them into the trunk, your movements slow, almost hesitant, as if trying to delay the inevitable.
Just as you were about to open the car door, something inside you stirred. You couldn’t let this moment end without saying it.
“Aeri,” you called out, your voice breaking the silence as you turned toward her, your hand resting on the handle of the door.
She looked up, her eyes lighting up just a little as she responded, “Mm?”
For a moment, you hesitated, unsure if you should say the words that had been circling in your mind. But the thought of leaving without voicing them felt unbearable. So you smiled, that bittersweet smile tugging at your lips as you spoke.
“What if this is a past life as well, and we are already something else to each other in our next life? Who do you think we are then?” You could feel a deep sadness in your voice as the words left your lips.
Aeri blinked, the question taking her by surprise. Her eyes searched for yours, as if trying to understand the depth of your meaning. She looked almost vulnerable at that moment, her lips parting slightly before she whispered, “I-I don’t know.” Careful with her words
There was something in the way she said it—like she wanted to know, like she wished she had an answer for you but couldn’t bring herself to find one. The distance between you two felt like more than just the physical space separating you—it was something neither of you could cross.
You had realized just then. At that moment. That she hasn’t been looking at you with any sort of love or longing. She’d just been looking at you with nostalgia. A life before the weight of the world crashed down on her.
You lowered your head with a sad laugh in response to her.
“Alright,” you began, “Goodbye, Aeri Uchinaga.. See you then.” you whispered finally parting ways with the girl you'd known 20 years ago.
A feeling of loss over you, almost suffocating. You still managed a genuine smile because you were happy Aeri was happy.
Bittersweet.
“See you.. then, Y/n L/n” she whispered.
With that, you gave her a small nod, your heart heavy. The air between you felt thick with everything unsaid. Aeri looked back at you, her eyes holding a mix of emotions—nostalgia, sadness, maybe a little bit of both.
You opened the door and got into the backseat of the Uber. You glanced out the window one last time, catching a glimpse of Aeri standing there under the streetlight. She looked a little blurry in the dim light, but still the same Aeri you’ve always known.
For a second, your eyes met again. Neither of you waved, neither of you spoke. You both knew this was how it had to end.
You took a deep breath and nodded to the driver, and the car pulled away.
You silently stared out the window as the scenery of Seoul flashed by while tears streamed down your face.
You’ll never know that she was crying too. Harder than she ever had before.
#kywrites#aeri x reader#aespa#kytalks#aespa x reader#aespa x you#aespa giselle x reader#aespa giselle#giselle x you#giselle x reader#giselle#aespa x fem reader#aespa aeri#aeri uchinaga#aeri uchinaga x reader#aeri#kpop x reader
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Jealous Ex!Katsuki x Fem!Reader
A/N: this is totally not based off of how i wish my ex acted when i had a creep hitting on me ha.
MDNI - SMUT BELOW CUT.
WARNINGS: ANGST/COMFORT, SLEAZY CREEP, HURT, UNPROTECTED SEX, RECONCILIATION SEX, DRUNK SEX
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It’s been six months. And I’m one drink down for every month since he left me. So I really shouldn’t feel as sick as I do when a random wraps their arm around my waist.
He tugs me into his scrawny, shirtless figure and my stomach lurches.
Everything smells of stale cigarette smoke.
This is wrong.
Gently I push the stranger off, wandering back towards the bar. A tired smile from the bartender greets me.
“Hi lovely,” I smile, jumping up on the barstool.
“What can I do for you babes?” The small person hums, mousy hair flopping across their face.
“Can you make me another one of those yummy cocktails? Y’know, the one with the fireball and the-” I start, leaning inwards.
“The one that tastes like autumn?” They finish, a knowing smile.
“Yes!” I can feel my head slosh as I nod. Maybe I’m more tipsy than I thought.
Unwanted arms twist around my waist yet again.
“Hey pretty,” Unkempt long hair tickles my shoulder. Hot breath on my neck.
“I’m gonna go back to dancing,” I excuse myself, untangling us. Clutching my drink, I weave in and out of the crowd. The warmth is more uncomfortable than it was before, sticky and clammy.
A pain in my shoulder, my drink wasted on myself and the floor.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry” I start, embarrassment heating my cheeks.
“Hey, watch where you’re-” A voice, so familiar it hurts. Low, and consistently gravelly.
“y/n.” Shock changes his tone. Aggression turns soft. My heart squeezes.
Six months.
Six months and I’m still so undeniably in love with Bakugou Katsuki it hurts me.
“Hi,” I mumble, eyes trained on my hands.
He clears his throat and my eyes can’t help but follow the noise.
Rubies.
I always said his eyes were rubies.
Not the blood of his enemies, like Kaminari so often joked.
Rubies.
Warmth and pain mixes inside of me, and I find myself biting my tongue.
I love you.
It would be so easy to say.
“Aww did you spill ya drink pretty? ‘S okay, I’ll get you another one.” Cigarette overtakes my smell and I do everything not to gag.
“Um, I’m actually gonna head home.” Shaking the man off yet again, I go to turn around.
“Ooh, ready for some fun are we? Lead the way, beautiful.” Hands around my waist, and my throat closes.
“No.” I shake my head, squirming out of his arms yet again.
“Aww, but baby” His arms are tighter this time, face nuzzled into my neck.
“Oi, she told you to fuck off.” Katsuki steps forward, and I go to turn my head.
“Ha, you’re just jealous that I’m gonna get somma this tonight.” Wet warmth trails up my neck and I cringe away.
Stifling hold is suddenly tugged away.
“She’s not interested, dickhead. Now fuck off before I make you.” Katsuki’s voice is grim, fearless. All I can focus on is wiping the saliva off my neck.
“Fuckin fine. She’s not that cute anyway.” I hear a huff becoming more and more distant.
Another arm. New, but old; drapes across my shoulders.
“Gonna walk you home to make sure no more creeps try’nd attack you.” Katsuki mumbles, gently guiding me through the crowd.
“Thanks,” I whisper.
The outside air is cold, drawing me closer to the man’s core heat. Small sparks on my shoulder act as a radiator.
The walk is quiet, and my head swims too much to understand if its comfortable or uncomfortable.
Only when we reach my apartment, does his warm arm leave me.
As if it’s muscle memory, he lifts up the pot plant; grabbing the spare key and letting us in. Kicking off my shoes, I wander towards the next best warmth I can get.
My bed is cushy, a welcome comfort.
Katsuki enters not too long after, water and toast in hand.
“You need to eat before you sleep,” He says, plopping down next to me.
Rubies, full of warmth.
“Why are you being so nice?” I mumble, eyes stinging.
I miss this. I miss him.
“Cause I fucked up,” He whispers.
“What did you do this time, Bakugou?” I sigh, picking up the glass.
“I hurt someone because I didn’t want them to hurt me first.”
My heart hitches.
“But then I realised that all I did was hurt both of us, for no goddamn reason.” The water splashes against the sides of the glass as I tremble uncontrollably.
“She won’t even say my name anymore.” The grief is heavy in his voice, breaking it gently. And I can’t hold back my tears.
“You said you didn’t love me anymore,” My voice warbles past the lump in my throat.
“I knew you could do better,” He mumbles, picking at the duvet he helped me choose.
“I don’t want better!” I cry, gripping the glass.
“I want you.” Glancing over, I can’t help but stare.
Bakugo Katsuki does not cry.
Yet diamonds fall from rubies.
“Then be mine again. Please.” He whispers, voice catching.
And all I can do is nod.
Coolness of glass leaves my hands. Warmth cradles my cheeks.
“Thank you baby,” His lips meet mine, and I’m home.
Home tastes like cheap cola from the bar.
Home is our teeth clashing as we smile through tears and kisses.
Home is my fingers twisting through staticy blond.
“I missed you so much,” I whisper against his jaw.
“Missed you more.” Strong arms pull me effortlessly into his lap. His hands stay on my hips, tracing gentle circles.
“Lemme show you how much I missed you.” Katsuki asks, tugging me impossibly closer. Kisses tickle down my neck, and my entire body floods with adoration.
“Please,” I nuzzle into his hair, savouring the closeness. I jerk my neck away as he gently bites exactly where he knows I hate.
“Katsuki,” I whine, shoving his face away. A warm chuckle reverberates through his chest. The sound is contagious, making bubbles in my chest.
“You’re an ass,” I bite back my smile, gentling pushing him further.
“Yeah, but I’m your ass.” He mumbles, pulling me back in. Arms push me down, feeling him grow beneath me.
My body clenches excitedly, as familiar hands start tracing up my stomach.
“Take this stupid thing off,” His voice vibrates against my neck, as he tugs at the hem of my top.
“Hm,” I muse loudly, deciding to have some fun. “No, I don’t think so.”
“You little shit,” He growls fondly, pushing the top up as his hands wander further. A gentle squeeze to my breasts is all I need to continue my attack on his jaw.
“But I’m your little shit,” I mock inbetween kisses. I feel his jaw clench beneath my touch.
“Alright, thats it.” He huffs, wrapping an arm around my waist.
Suddenly, I’m off his lap; the bed bouncing at my sudden shift in weight. The bubbles in my chest build until they burst into a fit of giggles.
“There’s my pretty woman,” Katsuki smiles, eyes soft. Gently, he fully removes my top. And then his own.
The warmth of skin on skin is a comfort I’ve missed oh so much.
Obviously, Katsuki missed it just as much; face disappearing into the valley between my breasts.
Soft kisses leave pins and needles, and I reach for his hand. In an instant, our fingers are interlocked.
Like he never left.
I revel in the moment, using my free hand to trace patterns on his shoulders.
Small sparks greet my skin as his other hand massages my thigh. I feel myself dampen at the closeness - leaning into his touch.
“You sure you want this pretty woman? You’re still tipsy,” Its so odd, hearing such soft words from such a hardened, aggressive man.
“Please, Kats” I breathe, moving my hand to his hair. A hum of agreement, and his loving assault continues.
I keep tracing patterns, unintentionally digging down as his hands get close to where I want them - no - need them to be.
A ghost of a touch, and I’m pushing myself up to meet him.
“Missed me that bad, did we?” He scoffs in amusement, fingers circling my clothed clit.
“Like you’re one to talk,” I mumble, cheeks heating. Softly grinding on me, my breath hitches.
“Sorry baby, but I’m not waiting anymore,” He whispers, pulling my panties off; his boxers following suit.
Rubies bore into me, sparkling with adoration.
And suddenly, pain and pleasure all in one.
“C’mon, you’re okay. You can take it.” Katsuki praises as he thrusts in. I blink through watery eyes, nodding.
The movement is slow at first, just until the pain falls away.
Then, its relentless.
The sound of skin on skin echoes through my small apartment, going at an unholy speed. My toes scrunch as I’m sent into ecstasy.
“See how much I missed you?” Hands grasp my hair, moving my head to the side to leave kiss after kiss.
“See how much I love you?” He grunts into my neck, suckling right near my jaw. Words fail, leaving me only able to whimper in response.
“Yeah that’s right,” He whispers to me, fastening his pace. More whines bubble past my lips.
“Love you so much, never gonna leave again, you hear that?” His words a near hiss, nipping my neck gently.
“Kats, kats, please,” I beg, gripping onto him for dear life. My stomach coils, and I don’t know how long I’ll last.
“Come on baby, cum for me.” He encourages, pushing deeper, faster.
I break, legs spasming as I gush.
But Kastuki doesn’t stop.
Instead, he pushes my ankles up near my ears - keeping his relentless pace. Tears spill over my cheeks at the overstimulation.
“Just a little longer, okay?” He promises, hot breath painting my thighs. I nod frantically, practically melting into the bed.
But the coil tightens again, and I can’t help but squirm.
“Come on, together this time. Where do you want me?” Katsuki asks, somehow pumping harder.
“Inside,” I croak through tears. It’s too much.
An eyebrow raises.
“You wan’t me to make you a mama, that it?” He huffs, beads of crystalline sweat coating his brow.
“Mhm,” I whine, clenching at the thought.
“Fuck, y/n.” He grunts, burying himself into me.
Warmth floods me, and my blond lover collapses ontop of me.
“Love you so much, Katsuki,” I whisper, tangling my hands through his hair. I press a gentle kiss to his temple.
“Love you more, dumbass.” He sighs, kissing wherever he can reach.
-BONUS-
“I guess this means you’re reinvited to Tsu and ‘Chako’s wedding.” I hum, scratching his head.
“The fuck you mean ‘reinvited’?” Katsuki snarls sleepily, nuzzling into my neck.
“Honey, you were my plus one. You never got your own invite,” I gently remind him, amusement tickling my insides.
“What cunts.” He grumbles, pulling me close.
“Katsuki!”
#bnha#bnha x reader#katsuki bakugou#bakugo katuski#katsuki bakugo x reader#mha#mha x reader#smut#mdni#mha bakugou#bakugou smut#katsuki bakugo smut#cw: breakup#cw: unprotected sex#cw: drinking#bakugo x y/n#bakugou x y/n#bakugou x reader#mha smut#bnha smut
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How do you deal with being unable to draw some days? My arms have been injured this past week and I feel like I’m worthless as an artist because I can’t push through the pain. I know resting is important and my injuries won’t last forever but it feels as though a huge part of myself has been taken away from me, how do you do it?
no lie those days/weeks/months/years Suck. it's very hard to disentangle your self worth from your productivity, and I still feel that way even when I can draw, because I have to work slowly and in small amounts so that I don't hurt myself! it's maddening, but I am trying to find solice in the fact that I am not valued by my output. This is a constant process, and sometimes I forget that I am not a machine for making 'content' which will be thrown away if it breaks. I am a person and a piece of the universe, and sitting reading books and watching movies and lying down in a nice patch of sunlight is an excellent use of the precious time that I have, it is not a waste of it.
The best piece of advice I have is look at animals! Look to your pets! I adore my lovely cute lil scrungly snootle dog so so so much and she doesn't work at all! I am so happy she is in this world! I love her when she is running around, I love her when she is eating, and I love her when she is sleeping. Same for plants. You don't walk up to a tree and be like 'hey, why aren't you doing anything? meet your damn quota.' The next time your brain is bullying you for existing, turn around and repeat whatever it said to a squirrel or a bug or a cloud or a table. It helps you to see how silly it is to say it to yourself.
Still. Not being able to draw does suck. I generally watch movies and read books and do gentle exercise. Go for walks, listen to music, talk to friends about how you feel. They will care, and the time will pass. Eventually.
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Nagizuru au creatures ~ probably their most normal drawings ever.
🩶
Today marks one year since I made my first Nagizuru post. I never thought I would love this beast so much. Thank you all so much for enjoying this au!
Here you have a small lighthearted fic written by @draconicsparkle as a gift. It's not connected to the original story, just them celebrating a regular birthday. They spoil them too much! ⬇️⬇️
How long had it been since then? So long. Both the creation date and their escapes. But in a strange way, Hajime was glad they had experienced all those hardships and difficult times. For without them, the two of them wouldn’t appreciate the bliss they were living in nearly as much.
Hajime thought this as his one working eye stared out the window in the small kitchen. The garden was visible from here, where all kinds of flowers and plants were growing. Gardening was one of Izuru’s many talents, after all. It would be odd if it wasn’t growing splendidly.
A small smile grew as he recalled the many hours they had spent sitting in the gazebo they had built in the middle of the garden, sandwiches and lemonade in hand while the butterflies and bees flew by.
But today wouldn’t be spent in the garden. No, Hajime had other plans. Hence why he was in the kitchen earlier in the morning. Izuru was still in their bedroom, sleeping away without sedatives. He wouldn’t dare wake him up, even now when they were far away from the Lighthouse’s rubble.
He bent down to check the oven’s window, pleased to see the cake sheets baking nicely. He grabbed an oven mitt and pulled the pans out, sliding them on the cooling rack. They were the perfect shade and smelled amazing. While they cooled, the brunette got busy preparing the whipped cream and cutting the strawberries he had picked yesterday. He focused hard on his task, not stopping until his creation was fully constructed. A beautiful and practically flawless strawberry shortcake. He almost felt bad for cutting into it and pulling a slice out to place on the plate. But he was far more eager to see the reaction, so he didn’t mourn the perfection.
After gathering a fork and a glass of milk, he placed everything on a tray and carefully picked it up. His months of practice came in handy, as the tray remained balanced the whole way to the bedroom. Using a shoulder, he bumped the door open so his hands didn’t leave the tray. Soon enough, he was placing the tray down on the nightstand. By this point, he knew the Ultimate Hope was awake now. “Good morning. Was your sleep restful?”
The red eyes gazed up at him, still mysterious and cryptic, though not nearly as hard anymore. Being free of pain and drugs was most likely the reason. “I can confirm that it was. The aroma of your creation coaxed me back to consciousness. Not that I mind this pleasant method of awakening.”
“I’m glad you think so, si-” Hajime paused, laughing in embarrassment. “I mean Izuru.”
The white-haired man smirked up at him. “Slip of the tongue?”
Hajime scratched his cheek, right under his silk eye cover. “Old habits die hard, I guess.”
“But they are getting to be fewer and less frequent,” Izuru observed. He sat up, the large shirt he was wearing slipping off a shoulder. “Can you hand me a hair tie, my dear caretaker?” he requested once he had risen into a comfortable position.
The brunette was quick to do so, though he did it with a grin. “That was on purpose. You’re teasing me, aren’t you?”
Izuru’s smirk didn’t diminish, even as he began gathering his long hair and weaving the hair tie around the locks. “Observant as always, my dear. Just one of the many traits I adore about you.”
Hajime felt his cheeks redden. He still wasn’t able to hide his reactions to Izuru’s words of affection. “I-I do my best.”
“That you do.” Izuru finished making his ponytail, letting it rest against his back. He then reached forward, tugging on Hajime’s arms. The strength of the tugs had been unexpectedly strong and Hajime found himself falling onto the bed alongside Izuru with a yelp.
“Much better,” Izuru stated as he hugged Hajime to his chest. “Wouldn’t you agree?”
The brunette wiggled only slightly to get more comfortable. “But… don’t you want your cake?”
“In a few moments. Let me indulge myself on this first,” was the reply. A pleased hum followed, along with some shoulder rubs that felt amazing. “Another day of tranquility. One that we earned for our perseverance through the blood and pain. The torture those foolish scientists inflicted while playing God. But I suppose it would be best to not dwell upon such horrid memories. It is beneficial to move on and build oneself back up stronger than before.”
The caretaker chuckled. “That the Ultimate Therapist at work? Putting in overtime, for sure.”
“Perhaps. But I will utilize my abilities for our sakes and lives. And I’m sure you are well aware of this.” One of Izuru’s hands migrated up to his hair, scratching his scalp and conjuring happy noises from the receiver.
“What did I do to deserve this? So nice,” Hajime muttered, relaxing into the comforting touches.
“If you would like reasons, I can compile a list. But be aware that it is a long one. It would take some time to read them all,” Izuru replied with his eternal smile.
“I appreciate the offer, but I think I’ll decline. You know how I am with rapid fire compliments.” The brunette relaxed under the ministrations, enjoying every second.
“Oh, I do have something to retrieve. Remain here in bed, okay?” Izuru withdrew and extracted himself from the bed covers, standing up and walking over to his closet. Hajime watched in confusion, especially as the pale man pulled out a giant crocheted blanket with a mandala design. “You are always making things for me, so I figured I could return the favor. It was surprisingly easy to keep my work on this little project secret from you. Though, I am certainly not complaining,” Izuru commented as he brought the blanket over, laying it over Hajime and tucking him in. “The pattern is a representation of our spiritual and physical journey through our lives. That we found our fulfillment after our struggles. Quite fitting, wouldn’t you agree?”
Hajime’s eyes, both functional and broken, widened at the colorful blanket now around him. He ran a hand over the design, admiring the nice material and the quality of the gift. “I… I don’t know what to say… This is…”
Izuru sat next to him, sliding under the blanket next to him. “I already know, so don’t fret. Nothing needs to be expressed.” He leaned over to the nightstand and grabbed the plate and fork. “Now then, how about we try your splendid creation?” The full strawberry on top was speared with the fork and was raised to their faces. “I’ll give you the honor of taking the decoration. You won’t refuse, will you?”
Hajime’s breath was shaky as he nodded. “You know that I would never refuse anything from you. Neither back then, nor now.”
“Excellent. Though there is one condition to get this. You will have to take it from me.” Izuru placed the lower half of the strawberry into his mouth, the thicker half sticking out. And the mischievous look in those ruby red eyes implied exactly what Izuru was insinuating.
Hajime’s face turned as red as the berry. They were about to do this, weren’t they? But he couldn’t go back on his promise, so he swallowed his nerves. He leaned forward and locked lips with the other, the kiss tasting like the sweet fruit. It lasted for several moments, neither of them eager to break it. Eventually, they did separate, the strawberry now in Hajime’s mouth. He focused on chewing to buy himself time to calm down from the rush of emotions. Though this was easily seen by the Ultimate Analyst, if the smirk was anything to go off of.
“Now, I shall taste test your work. Though I don’t doubt it will be fantastic. Thank you for the treat,” the Ultimate Hope said as he cut into the cake and took a delicate bite. “A nice way to wake up and start the day. And here’s to many more in our future.”
Hajime snuggled under the beautiful blanket a little more, resting his head on Izuru’s shoulder. Finally comfortable with initiating close contact after all this time. “Yes. I hope and wish for that, too.”
#nagizuru au#lighthouse au#danganronpa#nagito komaeda#danganronpa art#sdr2#danganronpa fanart#hajime hinata#komahina#nagito#nagizuru#danganronpa au#izuru!nagito#servant!hajime
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Blowjob handles
the worst Wolverine X fem!reader (18+)
[my friend suggested this idea and I couldn’t get it off my mind]
You’ve no idea how you ended up in a situation such as this. Whether it was your fault for suggesting that Logan deserved a treat for saving the world, or his, for being so goddamn attractive with that silly mask of his. That stupid thing that covered anything above his perfect mouth that you’ve loved to kiss so much. He never thought it could make someone as turned on as it made you, to say the least - he hated to dress up as a superhero. It felt humiliating, weird and on top of that, he’s never quite liked the attention that came with it. However that hatred seemed to be slowly slipping through his fingers as he’s found his place between your delicate thighs, eating your cunt as if it was the last thing he’d do in his miserable life. And also the best thing.
He groaned against your heat as he finally got to taste you again, diving in with nothing but need. Just the smell of your wetness was enough to overcome all his other senses when you told him about this ridiculous idea. When you mentioned that although he hated that mask, he was quite hot in it. Logan knew immediately why you mentioned that fucking thing, he saw the look on your face, how you pressed your thighs together. How could he say no to you? He’s gone far too long without sex, or any touch of the opposite gender at all. He’s become a starved animal and he hadn’t even known before laying his eyes upon you.
You lay on your back, all bare and completely vulnerable, dripping straight in his mouth as he devoured you, he himself wearing nothing but pants and the mask. Your hands were desperately trying to grab onto something, gripping the sheets only to hear him growl in frustration and move away only to bite down on your thigh, teeth sinking in your soft skin, drawing a pained gasp out of you, displeased with your poor choice. He didn’t want to hurt you, not at all and as a quiet apology, he planted a small kiss on the spot right after. It was meant as a reminder, he was basically urging you to do what made you come up with the idea. Fucking Wade… That’s what he had in mind knowing you’d never think about it if that fucker hadn’t infested your mind with such a thing. It was so obvious, yet the temptation was too strong to let such an opportunity slide.
You were in need of more stability, since this man has made you feel as if you were floating in the air even though he held you so tight you could barely move. What you were so embarrassed to do now seemed like the only option, so you grabbed onto the sides of his mask, pushing him deeper into you. You asked for it, you wanted him to keep it on, just this once, and it was the only decision he’d let you have in this moment.
The movements of his skillful tongue were enough to make you squirm in his hold as he abused you with the amount of pleasure he was delivering, both his arms hooked underneath your thighs so that you couldn’t escape him, and hell you knew you never wanted this to end. No matter how whiny you were, how overstimulated you felt without even cumming at all, how sensitive your body was to each and every one of his touches. The feeling of his warm mouth all over your cunt, part of his mask that was covering his nose pressing against your clit, over and over again with each motion he did, it was enough to make your vision go blurry, to make all your thoughts and worries go away. You couldn’t even keep your eyes open for long, only occasionally looking down at him to watch as he desperately attempted not to grind against the bed. Poor guy, you’ve got him so riled up he can barely control himself. And yet, he’s made it his mission to give you what you wanted, not just for you, but for himself as well.
Whenever you’d open your eyes, you’d be assured that he was staring back at you, even if you couldn’t see his own. There was something about it, not being able to see all of him, while he sees all of you. "This what you wanted, princess?” he questioned, only pulling away for a few seconds before sucking on your clit, making you throw your head back and turn the silent ‘yes’ into nothing more than a moan.
"Should’ve known you’d be a dirty girl.” You could feel him smile against you. He was enjoying this just as much as you were and definitely had a plan of doing it again after seeing just how much more flustered it made you. Your whimpers filled his ears and as your legs began shaking in his hold, he knew you were close. You looked so adorable like this, so beautiful and if only he could stay between your legs forever - he would.
One of his hands left its place only to sneak in between your legs as the other one wrapped around your waist, putting you in a position where you couldn’t do anything but cry out his name once his two thick fingers entered your hole. It was no secret that he was utterly obsessed with your reactions. The way your brows furrowed with each following thrust of his fingers into your throbbing core, dipping them deep in your sweetness while he was savoring all of it that he could. Starved, truly, that’s what he was.
"Lo… I-“ you choked back a moan as his fingers sped up and he teasingly placed a kiss upon your nub, before sucking it in, making your back arch. He loved it, loved making you feel like this, loved pleasing you, tasting you, knowing that he’s the only one who’ll ever do it.
"Come on, I’ve got you, sweet thing.” His voice sent shivers through your whole body, such simple words, but the impact they had on you… You couldn’t hold on any longer, the knot in your stomach was forming with the slightest of his movements and it was only matter of time, before your body would completely give in. You’ve come undone, whether it were the words of his that pushed you over the edge or his touch, you cared not.
He hasn’t stopped there, only pulling his face away, making you let go off the mask, to watch as you squirmed while his fingers pushed you even further into overstimulation. Tears formed in your eyes, you couldn’t take it. Though he knew you would. You were his good girl after all. You asked and he’s delivering.
Only when you finally came down from your high has he slowed his motions, working you through it, preparing for what’s about to come next. He’s far from done with you and you’ve soon realized that as well when his fingers left your aching core only so that he could unbuckle his belt.
You looked up at him, getting up on your elbows so that you could get a view of the beautiful man before you. "Isn’t Wade coming home in like ten minutes?” You asked, still breathless. You supposed that he wouldn’t be happy to find you two like this, in his bed.
"I couldn’t care less about that fucker right now.”
#logan howlett#the worst wolverine#Logan Howlett x reader#x men#Deadpool and Wolverine#wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#oneshot#smut
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SLAY THE QUEEN THORN
I was inspired by Abby's sketch of a hypothetical Queen version of the Princess, so I tried my hand at it with a few vessels, including this one. I... ended up drawing something akin to a fashion design concept art rather than a practical design that won't be tiring to draw over and over after a handful of sprites later. I also had to use a bit more artistic license growing unnatural poppies on the dress and the thick twirly prickly noodles.
some explanations behind the process
For the "mended" Thorn, I pretty much just removed the foreground thorns and added the dirt.
rambling/fangirling/screenshots below:
The Thorn is one of my favorites. If I had to choose only five vessels to offer to Shifty and there's no replayable feature, she'll definitely be one of them. I'm one of those suckers who's into Hurt/Comfort stories. Almost like a masochist for those fics, you could say. If the climax to an Action-heavy story is the defeat of one party, then the catharsis of Hurt/Comfort is when the two characters... well, comfort each other- either due to hurt from each other or someone else. In The Thorn's case, she started off rather innocently, Damsel-like, but not quite. She still had caution. It was until she was literally stabbed in the back that she learned that it was a mistake. And when Long Quiet offered sincere regret and admission of fault, she stabbed him... but she didn't feel the relief she thought she'd get from it. I think many relate to having been betrayed and/or betraying someone they trusted, and the scratches are felt by many players.
The thorns curve inward, as if it's more painful to leave her than it is to approach her.
Poppies grow around along the bramble. Many mistook them for roses because they're red and there are brambles (tbh, I actually dunno if they're brambles or briars, I looked them up and I got confused, forgive me, plant enthusiasts ;.;) that grow around the patches of those poppies. Death and romance~
This brings back to Chapter 1 where Hero was kinda-sorta-maybe-definitely crushing on the Princess and wants to give her the benefit of the doubt, not only because of feelings, but for a reasonable cause of wanting to rescue someone who possibly may actually be a victim of circumstance.
Look, I have reasons why Thorn route is one of my favorites and it definitely doesn't have anything to do with both characters having massive trust issues and the capability to change themselves for better or worse and the emotional moments hitting me like a lovely diamond-dusted dagger. Both of them are rather cat-like with pointy ears too.
I appreciate that you're still given the options to leave or stab Thorn, as if the situation isn't pitiable enough. Even her tiara looks like a crown of thorns. It's as if she views the thorns as both a form of penance and a defence mechanism to protect herself from being hurt again, even though she's hurt by her own making this time.
I chose for the Long Quiet to save her and leave the cabin together.
This part stabbed me the most. Even when shown genuine help, she shrinks back.
This part burns a bit of the jadedness away. Trust is a scary thing, so is love. How can you be so sure that you won't be hurt by the one you love again? But just like what The Prisoner says, it's about trust- blind trust. Thorn looks more human than her previous self- less animalistic, softer. A part of The Damsel returns, even in the music.
I recall weighing on whether I prefer the version with the Voice of the Cheated or Voice of the Smitten. I vaguely remember wondering if there was an option to ask her if it's okay to kiss her. I guess the ideal would be is to have that choice, but I suppose the climactic moment calls for it and she doesn't mind it, at least. It's like the option to hug Astarion from BG3, but you're not sure whether he'd be comfy with it after being hurt so much. He gave approval for it too~
As much as Thorn is one of my favorites, I'm not attracted to her and any of the vessels. Instead, I ship her with the Long Quiet- the character himself. I don't really see myself AS the Long Quiet, more like choosing what actions on what he does and I separate myself from him a lot for many reasons. It's a bit like the Harry situation from Disco Elysium in terms of seemingly blank-slate protagonists.
Instead, I kinda put myself into her situation to feel how she felt in this route. The poppies not only felt symbolic of her nature as part of the Shifting Mound, but also specifically the end of the mutual treachery you've inflicted on each other, potentially beginning anew on a path of healing.
==============ramble-bramble over===================
#black tabby games#slay the queen#slay the princess#the thorn#stp the thorn#surprise astarion from bg3#blood
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A new ladder - Reader x Curly
Previous - Part 6 - Next
"Do you like art exhibitions? It has opened one by my favorite artist."
You mentioned handing a brochure to Curly.
Curly: "Oh, I didn't know you liked art."
He unfolded the brochure to start looking at the details of the exhibition.
"What does that mean?"
Curly: "Ah- nothing, nothing... He's a very reserved artist, huh? 'The man who never shows faces, after years brings his new collection', sounds great."
"I'm surprised he brought another collection, he had been inactive for years," you smiled, "Here are some examples of old and somewhat popular works, what do you think?"
You pointed to some images in a collage that were in the brochure of previous exhibitions.
There was a mix of realism, abstract paintings, and cartoon-like styles.
Curly: "He has... many styles, it's incredible. I would love to go see his works."
"I'm glad to hear that because~ I already have two tickets for their exhibition~"
You showed him the tickets excitedly and handed him his.
In the afternoon, you headed to the exhibition and entered the building. There were many people admiring the paintings; there were all sizes and styles, even the children were entertained by the cartoon-like paintings, surely a great collection.
There was one detail that always caught everyone's attention: in his paintings, he never showed the faces of those he painted, perhaps a way to maintain their anonymity.
Faces covered with plants, with careless strokes, hats, or even covering themselves with hands, veils, or the person being turned away, among other things.
Curly stopped to look at one in particular, which he felt was too personal.
The artwork was called "A Winner Among So Many Losses."
It was a torso without a head, with a background of a starry night, as if it were submerged in space, and four bright stars formed the silhouette of its head.
X: "What happened to those people was horrible. Don't you think? I wonder if anyone understands the meaning of this painting, or if they have already forgotten that tragedy."
An elderly man in a wheelchair had stopped beside him, looking at the painting with a relaxed smile.
X: "People tend to forget events very quickly, it's good that someone frames them so they can be remembered, because that way those lost people will always be present in our minds."
"Curly! I didn't realize you had stopped," you returned to his side and observed the man next to him.
Soon a woman came running towards you and took the man's chair, scolding him for going off on his own, to which the man just laughed and gently patted the woman's face, making her smile.
They both said goodbye to continue viewing the exhibition on their own, while you noticed how Curly remained staring at the painting in front of him.
Curly: "It's me. A faceless captain, lost, and the only one who will have the memory of his crew. The only captain who didn't sink with his ship and now bears the face of shame."
"Okay, okay, I think you're being too critical over a single painting," you patted his shoulders "Besides, their families will always remember them."
Curly: "Their families... What must they think of me?"
"They must feel pain... Resentment... They must be thinking, 'why did he come back and my daughter, or son, didn't?' Being a survivor is difficult, many will be happy for you, but others... They will only suffer because their loved one was n't the one who survived... As if you were to blame for something just because you're still alive."
You rested your cheek on his shoulder and grabbed the sleeve of his shirt, trying to draw his attention away from the painting.
Curly: "...I should... contact them"
"If that makes you feel better... I can help you."
You smiled when he slowly took his gaze away from that painting to walk by your side and continue looking at the other works in the exhibition.
Curly: "I understand why you like this artist so much... He has such detailed works and they evoke a lot of emotions in you."
"I'm glad to have someone who shares that thought! You know? I could never bring my sister here to appreciate these paintings, she always said she didn't have time... And then I stopped insisting."
Curly: "I think I remember... That she used to get angry when she saw ads about these exhibitions. She said she hated that artist because she didn't like that he didn't do faces, and it made her nervous and gave her chills."
"It's just that she is like you were, she only saw the general image, didn't go deeper, never gave it a chance. If she saw something and didn't like it, she refused to see the beauty in it..."
You stopped in front of a painting and sighed.
Although you didn't make any comment about it, you soon continued walking while Curly observed that piece called "Beautiful Smile on a Perfect Day."
It was a bride holding a man's arm, resting her head on his shoulder; the irony of that painting was that the bride wore a veil and no smile could be seen on her face.
He approached and tried to focus his gaze on the bride's face, noticing that the veil was not completely solid; if you looked closely, you could see the bride's face, with her eyes closed and a smile on her lips.
"Curly! You're lagging behind again."
Before he could see the woman's face in the painting better, he walked away and hurried to join you.
That woman looked familiar to him...
#A new ladder mouthwashing#mouthwash#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing x reader#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#captain curly x reader#mouthwashing curly#curly x reader
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My best friend and I had a call recently---she’s back with her family for a bit helping out with some hometown stuff. As part of the stuff, she’s been going through a (deceased) relative’s scrapbook, compiled in the American Midwest circa 1870-1900 and featuring mostly cut-out figures from the ads of the day.
She talked about how painstaking this relative’s work was. (Apparently the relative was careful to cut out every finger, every cowlick; this was by no means carelessly or hastily assembled.) But she also she talked about how---the baby on the baking soda ad is ugly, it is so ugly, why anyone would clip this heinously ugly illustrated baby and paste it into a scrapbook? Why would you save the (terribly told, boring) ghost story that came with your box of soap?
(Why include these things in the first place? we asked each other. ”There’s a kind of anti-capitalism to it,” she mused.)
And we discussed that for a bit---how most of the images, stories, artists, and ads were local, not national; they’re pulled from [Midwestern state] companies’ advertisements in [Midwestern state] papers, magazines, and products. As a consequence, you’re not looking at Leyendecker or Norman Rockwell illustrations, but Johann Spatz-Smith from down the road, who took a drawing class at college.
(College is the state college, and he came home on weekends and in the summer to help with the farm or earn some money at the plant.)
But it also inspired a really interesting conversation about how---we have access to so much more art, better and more professional art, than any time in history. As my bff said, all you have to do to find a great, technically proficient and lovely representational image of a baby, is to google the right keywords. But for a girl living in rural [Midwestern state] of the late 1800s, it was the baking soda ad, or literal actual babies. There was no in-between, no heading out to the nearby art museum to study oil paintings of mother and child, no studying photographs and film---such new technologies hadn’t diffused to local newspapers and circulars yet, and were far beyond the average person’s means. But cheap, semi-amateur artists? Those were definitely around, scattered between towns and nearby smallish cities.
It was a good conversation, and made me think about a couple things---the weird entitlement that “professional” and expensive art instills in viewers, how it artificially depresses the appetite for messy unprofessional art, including your own; the way that this makes your tastes narrower, less interesting, less open.
By that I mean---maybe the baby isn’t ugly! Maybe you’ve just seen too many photorealistic babies. Maybe you haven’t really stopped to contemplate that your drawing of a baby (however crude, ugly, or limited) is the best drawing of a baby you can make, and the act of drawing that lumpen, ugly baby is more sacred and profoundly human than even looking at a Mary Cassatt painting.
And even if that isn’t the case....there was this girl in [American Midwestern state] for whom it was very, very important that she capture every finger, curl, and bit of shading for that ugly soap ad baby. And some one hundred years later, her great-something-or-other took pains to preserve her work---because how terribly human it is, to seek out all the art we can find that resonates with us, preserve it, adore it.
It might be the most human impulse we have.
#I of course went on a tangent about henry darger because I love darger and he was also pulling/tracing/finding inspiration in local ads#I was also thinking of the scenes in banshees of inisherin where gleeson plays the fiddle in the bar and the woman sings#clearly not professional! nowhere near mozart.#but you know what? those people are making art. they are engaged in the most human thing you can possibly do#my mother once talked about how when she was growing up in the chicago area the irish immigrants would sing and play at parties#and her mother (one generation removed from immigration) would scoff#because who did they think they were! they weren't professionals. they were making a spectacle of themselves.#''and then it died out. no one sings and plays at parties anymore'' she said quietly#celestial emporium of benevolent knowledge
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Dragon Ball: Super Hero × S/O ; Prompt
Characters: Gamma 1, Gamma 2, and Piccolo Inspired By: Random idea... I guess? A/N: This took a while to write (like three days max) but it was totally worth it. Hope you guys like it! ⚠️ Spoilers/Trigger Warnings for: FLUFFY BRAIN-ROT ⚠️
Disclaimer: Person A -> G.1 S/O & Piccolo / Person B -> G.2 S/O
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╚═════ Gamma 1 ══════════════════════════════╝
🦈 The sound of metallic footsteps made the silent Red Ribbon Army Headquarters bearable to walk around without any fear of a cricket chirping out of nowhere. Not that many members of the re-made group feared much
🦈 Gamma 1 strutted around in search of a specific member of the Army, his S/O. They said they would be coming back by 16:00, or 4:00 pm, from shopping for some things that Dr. Hedo needed for a new experiment. Well, that and some things to spoil the young genius with
🦈 He blinked calmly as he approached their door. The symbols that his S/O had drawn laid popping on the wood. While Commander Magenta wasn't fond of the random drawings around, he had to accept it. Y/N was of amazing use to the Red Ribbon Army, after all
🦈 The door opened as Gamma 1 twisted the handle and pushed it inside. The first thing that caught the Android's eyes was his S/O laying on the bed, knees bent on the side of the mattress while their arms did the same on the opposite side
🦈 You groaned dramatically as Gamma 1 cocked an 'eyebrow', wondering what you were doing laying on your bed in such a way. While you normally did sit or lay in unique manners, this was one of the most unique ones yet for your boyfriend
"Love? Why are you laying down in such a way?" He asked.
🦈 Sitting up as you looked at your boyfriend, he noticed a glaring difference on you. Your face had a slight bruise on the cheek, specifically your right one, which Gamma 1 would plant kisses on daily
"You can't kiss my cheek anymore because even the slightest touch makes it practically stab me in the face with pain. This is what it must feel like to be deprived of everything without consent..." You griped as you buried your face into a nearby pillow.
"Why would you think I wouldn't give you a kiss on the cheek anymore?"
"Like I said!" You drawled. "My bruise is trying to murder me!"
🦈 Gamma 1 sighed, you were always a hint dramatic. It wasn't horrible to the point of sabotaging any relationships you had, but it wasn't the best thing to occur when it came out. Normally having it result in your boyfriend carrying you around in his arms or just holding you as you ranted
🦈 Walking to the top of your bed, Gamma 1 reached and delicately pulled the pillow out from your grasp. It was obvious that you had been crying, as your eyes were puffier with the light now hitting them better
"Sit up." He said, making you shuffle upwards to make room for your boyfriend.
🦈 Thankfully, Dr. Hedo had made beds that sustained the weight of both of the Android twins at once, so you didn't have to worry about any incident when laying down together
"Go ahead and lay down," he continued, "and tell me about the rest of your day. Specifically how that bruise occurred."
🦈 You sighed dramatically with your hand over your head, acting like you were in a drama-centered theater production, and began to rant about your day, from going to the store, being hit in the head by a ball some kids threw accidentally, to having to practically force Dr. Hedo into eating something real quick
🦈 Gamma 1 smiled, his metal-cheeks just barely twitching upwards as you acted out. While many would find this quality annoying, Gamma 1 adored it about you. You were different. He liked that.
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╚═════ Gamma 2 ══════════════════════════════╝
🐳 You were used to your boyfriend, Gamma 2, being a complete idiot. His cockiness usually got ahead of him, resulting in some unfavorable situations to be made
🐳 Gamma 2 was not only having a bad day, but he hadn't been able to see his S/O in over 36 hours! You had been sent out by Commander Magenta to grab some paperwork to sign off a deal with another company and hadn't returned from your miles-long journey to-and-from
🐳 He crashed onto the chair, his feet raising and hitting the ground, making a loud bang echo in the building. The passing soldiers just shrugged and continued on their shifts, weapons raised and guards up
🐳 Gamma 2 groaned as he shifted, trying to bring his knees up to his face to bury into, and it was not going as he planned
🐳 As he kept shifting and trying to bring his knees up into the chair, it was so small that it wouldn't allow anymore room for his feet to rest, which was starting to annoy the powerful-Android
🐳 All of a sudden, the door nearby opened, revealing your form there. Your stoic expression calming Gamma 2 down and making him jump up and fly into you at full-speed
🐳 When he hit your frame to hug you, you mentally thanked Dr. Hedo for adding some enhancements onto your form. He knew that Gamma 2 was an excited fellow and he wanted you to be safe from any kind of danger you faced. You were like the new Android 17 and 18
🐳 Your hair flew back from the pressure of the air before falling back down on your back. Gamma 2 just smiled and clung to your body, asking how you were and how much he missed you
🐳 Blinking as he emphasized his last couple days, you mentally looked a lot differently than you did on the outside. While anyone who passed would've guessed that you were annoyed, a select few (Dr. Hedo and Gamma 1), would know that you were happy to be near your boyfriend
"-And I swear, if I have to listen to another documentary without you suffering by me, I may just combust!"
"Is that so?"
"YEAH!"
🐳 Sitting down in a nearby chair while the Android burrowed his face into your stomach while sitting on the floor, you continued to listen to his dramatic rambles. You could sit here forever listening to his adorable speeches...
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╚═════ Piccolo ══════════════════════════════��╝
🪺 Piccolo trained and meditated all day, when he wasn't watching Pan with you that is
🪺 Your boyfriend and you normally would just sit down and do whatever you wanted. You normally watched something on your phone while Piccolo just meditated, he enjoyed these moments with you dearly
🪺 But the moments you held deeper was when you could finally get underneath his grumpy-exterior
🪺 Take the other day for example. You had a crap day, coming home from dealing with Bulma and Vegeta's aggression for nearly four hours in a 'therapy session'
🪺 You closed the door behind you with your foot and stumbled into the living room, plopping your bag down on the ground next to you as your legs gave out and you collapsed onto the soft sofa that you got for you, Pan, and Piccolo to rest on when babysitting
🪺 The yells of the husband and wife made you groan and try thinking of something else, ranging from the fight you had against Frieza on Old Namek years ago to the newer fight there was against almost every other universe in existence
🪺 Piccolo then walked inside from the backdoor, his larger form caused larger-sounding steps. So, when he took his first plunge into the home, you knew it couldn't possibly be anyone else except for your Namekian lover
🪺 The Namekian stepped inside from the kitchen and he paused when catching sight of you laying face-first into the cushions. He knew what was up, you had been hired by Bulma to help her and Vegeta handle some anger-issues, and even he knew how bad that could be
🪺 You at first pushed it off like nothing, saying you'd be fine and that it'd be nice to hang around your two old friends. Oh, how wrong you must've been...
"Y/N? Are you alright?" He only heard the muffling of your voice coming from the pillows in a reply.
"Lift your head up. I can't understand you when your burying your face six-feet-deep into the cushions of our couch."
🪺 Pulling yourself up from the softer-materials, you looked at Piccolo and groaned, flopping back on the back of the couch that time before ranting about your day
🪺 Piccolo sat down beside you as you spoke. This ranged from how idiotic it was for the married couple of more than 10 years to argue in such a constant manner. Especially when it would seemingly die out and when one person said another word, it'd go right back up in flames
🪺 As your dramatics increased, Piccolo just watched and listened. His large ears slightly twitched as you swapped from acting like Vegeta in the situation to acting like Bulma. Heck, you even put on a blue hat to be the woman and then picked up a nearby large hunk of broccoli to act like the male
🪺 With anyone else, Piccolo would be annoyed and just interrupt with his opinions on the matter. But this wasn't anyone else, this was you. You were his chosen one. You were his one and only, no matter how long either of you lived to be
🪺 So, for now, he'd let you have your fun while he had his
#Dragon Ball#Dragon Ball Super#DBS#Earth’s Fighters#DBS Villains#Androids#Namekians#Dragon Ball x Reader#Dragon Ball Super x Reader#DBS x Reader#Earth's Fighters x Reader#DBS Villains x Reader#Androids x Reader#Namekians x Reader#S/O! Reader#GN! Reader#DBS Gamma 1#DBS Gamma 1 x Reader#DBS Gamma 2#DBS Gamma 2 x Reader#DBS Piccolo#DBS Piccolo x Reader
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Another Much Needed Follow Up About Love and Aromanticism, Where It’s Time We Cleared Things Up. Oh, And Mumbo Is Here Too.
this fic can be read on its own as a one shot, but I would recommend reading this first, as the context provides a little more insight on why the characters are reacting the way they do to each other
Over the course of a couple weeks very little changed. Mumbo spent the majority of his time planted in one place, anchored somewhat in the shallows so he could lift his head and listen to what the humans were doing on the days they came around. As much as it pained Mumbo to be so still so much of the time, it was a necessary evil if he ever wanted to heal, and he very much did. It didn’t matter how little he moved his tail at this point, anything he did would only result in his condition worsening.
If it wasn’t for Scar, he would have left a while ago. The humans didn’t come every day anymore, but they came often enough, and they certainly noticed Mumbo’s lack of activity. Grian tended towards keeping his distance, which didn’t bother Mumbo at all, but Scar really went out of his way to be there; sitting close (a gesture Mumbo was beginning to mind less), bringing him human trinkets to look at and play with (always exciting), but most importantly Scar brought food, and a lot of it at that; Mumbo wouldn’t have been able to stay without it. He often wondered where Scar got the many bags of fish he brought; it wasn’t all very fresh, so it was probably supplied from a human stockpile, but regardless, Mumbo was grateful. He wasn’t often in the best of moods and didn’t speak very much despite the fact he was sure Scar would have been ecstatic to talk with him, but he hoped regardless that Scar knew how deeply grateful he was.
Today, Scar and Grian were sitting on the shore together, shoulder to shoulder as they bent over one of their human activities. The first time Mumbo saw them drawing together, he had asked to see (saying ‘What’ over and over again seemed to have gained several different meanings over the weeks), but Scar had showed him that the paper they wrote on got ruined in the water, ripping easily, so it wasn’t something Mumbo could learn about personally. That was okay though, he was content to watch.
“Okay,” Scar began tapping the writing utensil (‘pencil’) to his lips, “Do we have anything to revise about the list this week? I don’t think very much new has happened.”
“Read it again, will you?”
“It’s right here in front of your face, do I really have to?”
“We’ve been over this Scar, I’m conditionally illiterate. Like right now, you got me up early and I’m tired and the words are so far away and I don’t want to. Also your handwriting is atrocious.”
“I’m tired too! It’s not my fault my fish guy needed me to show up at 6 AM.”
“You have a car, Scar. And a license.”
“Oh hey! Look at this cool list!” Scar directed Grian’s attention back to the paper, Grian only rolling his eyes before letting Scar continue. “Well, I won’t go into detail on my notes about what he eats because that’ll just bore you, but to put it simply, basically everything that’s got meat on it. Fish, shellfish, red meat, chicken, mostly just fish is what I’ve been giving him though, since I’m assuming that's what makes up most of his diet. Want to make sure he gets all the proper nutrients, you understand, you understand.”
“Uh huh.”
“As for ‘Likes,’ we’ve got fish, human stuff, Scar, Grian-”
“Scar first?” Grian cut his friend off with a raised eyebrow. Scar blinked several times before answering.
“What?”
“Scar, Grian. You put your name before mine.”
“Well this list wasn’t meant to be in order, but if it was, my name would absolutely go before yours.”
“What! No it wouldn’t. He likes us equally. Mumbo and I have a mutual understanding that we do not want to be anywhere near each other most of the time. We respect each other. From a distance.”
Scar smirked, throwing Mumbo an amused look as if he understood anything that was going on. “You know if you wanted to you could also bring him gifts and stuff. Nothing is stopping you. You could even bring him his fish if you wanted to, he wouldn’t know the difference. I wouldn’t care. There’s really nothing to be afraid of, especially now when he’s so docile like this.”
“I’m not afraid of Mumbo.”
“No?”
“If anything, he’s afraid of me, Scar. I got him in that net, I’ve gotten close to killing him a couple times- he knows it, Scar, he knows. He knows what’ll happen if he steps out of line, that’s what. I told him. I told him all about it.”
“Did you now,” Scar chuckled, nudging Grian playfully, “Well in that case, I’m definitely sure he likes me more. And I’m sure you’re perfectly content with being feared, but if you ever change your mind, I’d be happy to help.”
Grian huffed, “I won’t. Continue though.”
Scar lingered for a moment, a gentle fondness etched on his features before turning back to the paper, reading, “Well, he plays around with those vines and roots and things sometimes, he clearly is very curious, he likes to learn, and I think he likes birds, but he might just be staring at them because he wants to eat them. I put bugs in our ‘Neutral’ category since every time I try to give him a bug he just eats it, but I can’t tell if he just eats bugs or if he’s scared of them or something.”
“I highly doubt Mumbo is afraid of bugs. I doubt he cares.”
“Well, you never know! In ‘Dislikes’ we’ve got nets, sleeping bags, being touched, fighting- actually this isn't super related, but I really want to set up a Good and Bad system with him. A thumbs up thumbs down kind of situation. I was thinking about it all last night- we aren’t very good at communicating what we like or don’t like, and this feels like a good solution, but I’m not exactly sure how to tell him clearly what I’m trying to do. How would he know thumbs up means ‘good.’ And vice versa? Maybe bad would be easier to start with, but at the same time he kinda seems like a bite first ask questions later kinda guy.”
“Oh, that’s a good idea. Definitely start with thumbs up. With any luck he’ll understand that thumbs down is the opposite and you can go from there. I think you could probably associate the gesture with things Mumbo likes. The tape measure, fish- he knows smiling is a positive thing even if he doesn’t smile himself, and he knows what ‘yes’ means as well. With enough of that, I think he’ll grasp the meaning pretty quick.”
“I think so too,” Scar paused for a moment, thoughtful, “You know, this doesn’t just have to be a me effort. You could come and speak to him as well. He would know you’re putting in the effort if you wanted him to like you more.”
“He likes me plenty!” Grian switched from relaxed to exasperated on a dime, throwing up his hands as Scar laughed. “He likes me, Scar.”
“I know he likes you. But I also know he doesn’t have the full picture. He doesn’t know how much time you spend brainstorming how to teach him things, or how to relieve his stress, or worrying when he’s not feeling well. I just want him to know you aren’t as distant as he probably thinks, especially if it bothers you. If you wanted to get a little closer and help me with the ‘good’ and ‘bad’ gestures, that’d be a start.”
Grian was silent for a long time, brows creased tight above his eyes. “Maybe,” he said finally, almost quietly, “But not today. I’m too tired.”
“Yeah, me too,” Scar sighed, content, letting his head fall to rest on top of Grian’s, who squeaked, jumping so hard he accidentally jabbed at Scar’s chin with his shoulder. It must not have hurt though, because Scar didn’t seem to mind at all, unmoving. Slowly, Grian untensed, his head falling gently on Scar’s shoulder. Mumbo had a somewhat ridiculous pang of longing despite still holding a strong aversion to any human touch at all. They just looked so relaxed- anyone would wonder what it was like to be human. Though, while Scar closed his eyes, Grian didn’t quite look satisfied, something like conflict sitting across his features. He sat like that for a while, eyes moving, but not quite looking at anything at all, apparent restlessness building. Then he stopped. Closed his eyes. Opened them.
“Scar, are you aromantic or are you just fucking with me? Because I outright refuse to believe anyone is actually this clueless.”
Scar opened his eyes. Silence. “Uh oh.”
“Uh oh???” It was safe to say the two of them did not look relaxed anymore, Grian jerking away, “Scar, what does ‘uh oh’ mean. You can not just say ‘uh oh’ and nothing else.” Mumbo’s fins raised at the tone of his voice, but Mumbo cringed back when Grian whipped around to face him with an aggressive point. “No. You stay. Scar, I need you to say more right now.”
“I-Sleeping, I mean, we weren’t sleeping yet- but resting like- not friends? Not normal? Bdubs- I am going to strangle that man!”
“So you’re aromantic?” The words leapt off Grian’s tongue like an accusation, but he relaxed almost immediately after, sighing into his hands, “You’re aromantic. Okay. Good. Okay.”
“I- I mean I don’t love labels. I don’t really know, I don’t know much of anything at all, really. I’m sorry, Grian, I didn’t- did no one tell you I have a horrible track record for these things? Did you want me to ask you out? I still can.”
“Goodness, Scar, no! You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, you’ve just been sending incredibly mixed signals and I needed to know what was going on with you before my head exploded and my brains went all over the place and poor Mumbo would have to witness that and we don’t want that, do we? We don’t want that. This is fine, though, we just need to work out some boundaries.”
“What if I did want to though? To ask you out?”
Grian stared. Scar stared back.
“You do not want to.”
“I’ll have you know, I like you plenty a lot! I like you all sorts of ways, and if you also like me, then that’s cool! I’ll tell ya, when I had my little politics phase, my campaign manager was this great guy, Bdubs, we’re still friends, too, have you met him? Anyway, he’s a pretty touchy guy as well and he convinced me all sorts of things were totally normal friend stuff. Oh, we had this great cushy chair in our office and it was only really meant for one person, but sometimes we’d both be so tired and just squeeze into it and it wasn’t any sort of comfortable at all, but in a way it kinda was. Like inside. You know?”
“Scar, do you actually want to ask me out or are you just saying that because you think that’s what I wanted.”
“Isn’t that what you wanted?”
“Not what I asked.”
“Well, Grian, it really doesn’t matter to me either way!” Scar gave Grian a big smile, like these words were the ones that would definitively solve their dispute, but the expression started to drop when Grian looked mortified. “Is..” Scar started, unsure now, “Something wrong?”
Mumbo had never seen such a wide range of emotions cross Grian’s face before his head dropped onto his knees with a soft thunk. “No. It’s fine.”
Scar stared for a long while, a gentle churning of thought moving behind his eyes. He relaxed, scooching to give Grian a little space before smiling again, the expression soft. “Can I tell you a story?”
“Sure, Scar.” Grian’s voice was muffled between his knees, and given his face was covered, Mumbo had no idea how he was feeling.
“So there was this one time in high school where I was good friends with this girl, and she was awesome, just the best, and we hung out like constantly, and y’know how people get sometimes all pushy asking about dating and stuff, but you also know high schoolers who can’t communicate if their life was on the line. So all my friends are like dude, you guys are literally dating, aren’t you? And I say no! I insist we’re not every time, I insist! Yes, we went out together often and we talked for hours and her family had some money troubles so a lot of the time I offered to pay, you know, normal stuff, it was normal, I promise, but one day I get this call, right? From one of her friends! And this girl just starts ripping into me, like, seriously! She’s telling me all this stuff I had no idea about- telling me my friend is so confused, that she doesn’t feel pretty around me, that I’m always trying to avoid intimacy- that I refused to kiss her! And I was like what, whoa there! No one has ever tried to kiss me! Why are we talking about kissing people? She thought we were dating, Grian.”
“I got that.”
“And then she dumped me! My first breakup, and I didn’t even know! I was kinda bummed, too, I had always kinda wanted to kiss someone, but I thought they’d tell me first! Y’know, that they wanted to. I would have been so ready! The worst part is I think my guy friends were trying to tell me we were dating, not just teasing me. They also thought it was funny though, so. Who knows.”
“Yeesh.”
“I know, right! And this other time in college there was this other girl- we had mutual friends and stuff and we were at a party and just absolutely wasted and she grabbed me by the collar and she said ‘SCAR,’ she yelled in my face, she said ‘I’ve been FLIRTING with you for WEEKS and YOU’VE been flirting BACK. ARE YOU GAY?’ And I said, drunk, ‘A little bit!’ And then we danced all night. It was awesome. She was so cool. That kinda stuff happened a lot in college, actually. Guys are a bit more direct, which I appreciate. I’m a little stupid, I need the extra help sometimes.”
Grian tensed where he was sitting, quiet for a short pause before speaking, “You’re not stupid, Scar.”
“I mean. A little bit.”
“No. You’re not stupid.”
Scar was silent for a long while, staring despite Grian’s head still being buried in his knees. “I don’t know about that.”
Grian lifted his head, shaking it ‘no.’ He blinked a couple times before shaking his head again, a little more forcefully. “I’m sorry I snapped at you. I shouldn’t have done that, I should’ve just talked to you like an adult and told you how I was feeling. Sometimes you’re just really confusing, and that’s not your fault, you just.. go about the world in a different way. And it’s not a bad way either, it’s not wrong. If people can’t communicate exactly how they’re feeling to you, that’s a them issue. You’re not stupid. I’m sorry I made you feel that way.”
“I didn’t mean to lead you on. I never meant to hurt you.”
“I know, Scar. I shouldn’t have said that.”
“I really thought we had some sort of understanding- and I did mean it when I said we could give this a shot. I like dating, Grian, I always have a lot of fun! I can be- I know I can be- I have trouble sometimes, I just ruin good things-”
“Scar, stop, please. I don’t want anything you don’t want. Period.”
Scar didn’t seem to know what to do with that, staring uselessly at his own hands before looking back up. “I want it, Grian,” he stressed, his arms trembling, but Grian only stared, lips gently parted.
They both looked.. So sad. Mumbo longed to help, to sing, to do something, but he was stuck outside of their world.
Grian extended his arms. “C’mere, buddy.”
Scar collapsed into them, shaking as he did. Grian didn’t move, rubbing slow circles on Scar’s back while he cried. There was a certain focus behind Grian’s eyes, a certain calm as he held his friend close, and Mumbo.. well, it was clear Grian didn’t need Mumbo’s help. So that was the power of human touch.
He’d have to learn it one day.
#hermitcraft#gtws#goodtimeswithscar#grian#mumbo jumbo#hermitcraft fic#hermitshipping#scarian#desert duo#mumbomaid au#hermitfic
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The Couch in S8 and how it will tie to buddie canon, a 9-1-1 analysis
First of all, I'd like to say that this theory is based solely on observations made by myself and others, on camera and lighting choices which, as we all know, are always very important in a TV show. I'm NOT going over the previous couch theory from s6, 1. because I don't have the time and 2. because everything has already been said (Buck falling asleep on Eddie's couch because it's the only place he feels safe, Chris falling asleep in the same place, yada yada).
Next, this theory is going to be pretty much chronological, but I may be getting a little ahead of myself at times, sorry. In the end, you'll see, it makes sense, but I'm also asking you for a bit of imagination.
Let's dive into it!
Everything begins in 8x01. We get a scene between Buck, Tommy and Eddie, who are organizing a birthday party for Chris over a facecall. Eddie's couch makes its first appearance this season: Eddie sits on it to call Chris, and Buck and Tommy hide behind it.
Buck and Tommy share a moment. It's cute to see Buck so comfortable in his relationship and his attraction. Well, Tommy is awkward but, are you surprised? (no) As Eddie starts the call, Buck and Tommy jump from behind the couch and we get the first frame interesting enough for this analysis.
What can we say? Eddie is alone on the couch, Buck on his left and Tommy on his right.
(Eddie is once again between Buck and Tommy. In all their scenes together, there's always someone in between the other two. That's not the point here but I love to point it out.)
Buck isn't with Eddie, he's standing behind the couch. It's acting like a physical separation. Buck can only watch Eddie's pain from a distance as the call goes on, and he is useless. Powerless.
That will be the case throughout the early part of this season.
Buck doesn't do anything about Chris and Eddie. Why? I still don't know to be honest with you.
Eddie doesn't talk to Buck about Chris at all. They don't share a single scene alone in the privacy of one of their homes. There's always someone with them - Tommy, the rest of the crew - or they're at the station. Eddie will talk about Chris to Hen, Bobby, the cheerleader's father, Father Brian, even Brad in 8x08. NEVER Buck.
There's also something interesting about the fact that Eddie and Buck don't really talk to each other until Tommy breaks up with Buck.
It's probably not conscious, but I really think Buck is actually distracted by Tommy. He's in this new relationship, it's good, it's cute, it's really different from what he's used to.
We'll see that this will eventually go away...
(A quick interlude: Of course this isn't the first time we've seen 3 people with the couch. It also happened with Buck, Eddie and Chris in S3 - yeah, when couch theory wasn't even a thing. They're on Buck's couch though, but I'm planting a seed in your mind, watch out...)
Next time, it's not Eddie's couch we're talking about, but Buck's. It appears in 8x05, when Buck is sitting in his armchair after returning from the hospital and Tommy is looking after him. There's a lot to say in this scene, but I'm going to focus on one or two things.
Episode 5 was shot after episode 6. I can't stressed out how much it's hit after hit to show us that Buck and Tommy are not staying together (and indeed, Tommy breaks up in 8x06). I imagine the writers ran with the opportunity to show just how incompatible and how physically separated Buck and Tommy are, as well as drawing many parallels between Tommy and Eddie. Maybe I'll talk about that someday.
In this frame, Buck and Tommy are separated. Buck is sleeping in the armchair and Tommy on the couch. I know it's better to sleep in a sitting position when you've dislocated a shoulder, but they could have had Buck sleeping in his bed, snug in his pillows, Tommy next to him.
They didn't.
They made Tommy sleep on the couch. Buck's uncomfortable couch. The one I think he bought with Natalia (if I'm wrong, please don't hate me, season 6 is far in the back of my mind).
See, Tommy doesn't even fit properly on the couch. He's got his head on the armrest and he doesn't have a blanket that covers him completely. He doesn't fit into Buck's life, no matter how hard he tries. He's always out of place.
He chooses the couch Buck doesn't like, and he'll be the only one in this season so far to use it. Buck will never choose this couch, even if he thinks it's the right choice.
(By the way, Oliver said in an interview literally released before episode 8 that Buck's couch is uncomfortable.... Thanks for that, I know you're a couch theory truther Oliver.)
Next couch, 8x06. Eddie's Risky Business moment.
He dances in his living room and jumps on his couch twice. The first time to recreate the scene. The second time, he chooses to lie down on the couch to bask in the euphoria a little longer. Eddie has his first moment of pure joy in years, and it's on the couch that he decides to settle and calm down. Not saying too much about it but I wanted to point it out, once again.
Where it gets interesting, you know it, is when Buck arrives. Buck, who's just been dumped and once again goes to Eddie for a little comfort. He hands Eddie a beer and sits down first on the couch to drink his own.
Let's take a look at this last frame. The framing ticked me off as soon as I saw it, but I couldn't put my finger on why. Now, I know.
Eddie and Buck are sitting side by side, yes, but! If you pay close attention, you can see several things.
First, Buck appears completely in the frame, from shoulder to shoulder. He takes up most of the space, sitting upright on the couch, staring straight ahead.
On the other side, Eddie leans against the backrest, but in doing so, he moves out of frame. The arm and hand holding the beer are totally offscreen. He's looking to the side, not at Buck.
It's already a weird composition, a very pointed choice, because why aren't they both clearly visible in the frame? Why is Eddie a little off the side? This could have been filmed in a slightly less close-up shot, to show them both fully, but it's not. It's clearly a choice.
Let me direct your attention to the wall behind them. You'll see, it's interesting.
Between them, but rather on Eddie's side, what can we see? A picture. Yeah, but not a random one. You can see it more clearly on this frame of Eddie.
Yep. It's an art of Texas. Quite ugly if you ask me. (Eddie, you're clearly making some strange choices when it comes to decorating.)
I won't try to analyze this framework any further, as you've already understood what I'm getting at if you've been paying attention.
It's a foreshadowing of Eddie leaving for Texas.
So we got Eddie leaning away from Buck, a Texas pic on the wall between them, while Buck is just here, choosing Eddie's couch (and Eddie) for comfort after his breakup. It's where he feels safe. Eddie is always here for him when he's not okay, he's his constant. See how the colors are warm, golden? It screams safe. It screams home.
They don't need to talk, they have each other... or so he thinks. Sorry Buck.
Let's move on to 8x08. Where it all makes sense.
Very quickly: Eddie isn't making his call to Chris on the couch, but on his coffee table. First, what the hell? It's weird, unless you think he considers the couch a nice place, and that this conversation will be far from nice in his head. Indeed, he was right.
Buck shows up at Eddie's after baking way too much bread, because he almost called Tommy. By the way, the mere fact that he decided to go to Eddie's to stop himself from doing so speaks volumes as fucking always, but let's not get into that.
(Look at his little basket, his bread all wrapped up. Buck, you're everything.)
When he realizes that Eddie is seriously thinking of moving to El Paso... well, he supports him. He supports him, because that's what a best friend is supposed to do, right? He suggests to Eddie, and I quote, “we should move this party to the couch”.
By the way, this is the first time he's explicitly brought the couch to Eddie. And we know that when a character mentions something for the first time when they never did, it's to emphasize it.
It's the same with Eddie saying he's straight… or when he says “we?” after Buck's suggestion. They are in this together, and it's what Eddie realizes when Buck goes to sit on the couch... He doesn't have to do all that alone. (Take that little side analysis, my treat. I fucking love this scene, I want to dissect it.)
Buck sits on this couch he's chosen many times over the years.
It's THE couch, the one he always goes to when something is not right in his life. After he died, when he couldn't sleep at home. After his breakup.
He's the first to sit on it ... yes, just like in 8x06.
(This may seem trivial, of course, but the fact that he always goes without waiting for Eddie... Imo, it screams “Buck will figure it all out first and Eddie will have to catch up with him later”. Or "Buck will be waiting for Eddie". Same with him already drinking his beer while Eddie struggles to open it. Maybe a bit far-fetched, but eh? Anyway.)
The setting of the scene is so cold, and I didn't realize it until I compared it with the other scenes on the couch. This creates quite a contrast.
(Sorry I need to talk about something. Let's open an analysis in the analysis.
Buck is dressed in blue - it's Eddie's color in the color theory - while Eddie is dressed in a brownish button down. When I first watched this scene last night, I didn't notice, but looking again… Don't these outfits remind you of anything?
Yeah. I know, they're not the same, but they're similar and it's enough for me to make the parallel. Buck was there for Eddie when Chris left, and he's now here for him when Eddie wants to move to Texas.
Something about "I love you, so I'm letting you go". I'm crying too, don't worry.)
Back to the couch.
Eddie is totally off-screen, he's gone compared to the last time we saw the couch. Buck is alone, something shifts on his face - I'm not gonna lie, it was like watching a fanfic from AO3 on my screen. I've read enough feelings realization to recognize something close. Okay, to be fair, I don't know if it's a total realization of his feelings, but it's a start... and how beautiful that it's happening on Eddie's couch.
The couch represents safety, love, family for Buck. We understood it in s6 when it was first brought up.
By sitting on it, Buck chooses this life with Eddie, in a way.
Can you see the frame with the Texas pic? It's now completely visible, in the frame. It's behind Buck, over his shoulder. Eddie's departure, and by extension Texas, will haunt Buck for a long time to come.
I have to say, this shot is incredible. The whole scene is. I want to play it again and again, I want it tattooed on my eyelids. I'm gonna think about it for 3 months.
In a few episodes, we've gone from Buck behind the couch - away from Eddie's problems - to Buck on the couch, alone - totally there and available for Eddie, even though Eddie soon won't be.
After the breakup, Buck can finally talk to Eddie, care about him - not that he didn't before that, but he's finally free to throw himself back into his relationship with his best friend as before.
Buck has found his home, his couch, the relationship he's most comfortable in, but maybe it's only now, when Eddie's about to leave, that he realizes it.
The couch was never about Eddie - it was always about Buck and his relationship with him. So it's even more powerful to see him behind it in 8x01, on it with Eddie in 8x06 and finally all alone in 8x08.
(I didn't know Oliver confirmed the symbolism of the couch back in S6 but, once again, thank you Oliver.)
(Even if Tim Minear tries to say he doesn't know what it means... Please Tim, we know you're smarter than that).
So what can we expect from this couch for the rest of the season?
If Eddie is really leaving, which I don't believe, he might offer Buck his couch. If the couch is how Buck will realize that he has feelings for Eddie, I'm going to send a gift to everyone who's believed this theory since it first appeared. You're the real ones in this fandom.
If Eddie stays, I think we'll be getting more scenes with the couch. We could go from 3-2-1 to 1-2-3. Stay with me, and grab your imagination. We're going full in theory mode.
1 - Maybe we could have another scene, this time with Eddie alone on his couch? I could see this happening when he's packing, Buck not far away, and Eddie starts to wonder if this is really the right thing to do as his gaze lingers on Buck for a moment too long.
2 - We need two people on that couch again. I'm a big "Buddie first kiss in Eddie's kitchen" truther, but it could also happen on the couch.
Or they could have a big conversation together on it, that will eventually lead them to confess their feelings to each other later on. Maybe that's when Eddie decides to fight to get his son back, to not move to Texas? To confront his parents?
That's two scenes on the couch, two scenes where they don't really talk, even though the couch is an invitation to do so. I'd find it extremely interesting if their first real serious conversation this season took place here.
3 - Finally, we could go from Buck, Eddie and Tommy to something much better for a 3-characters scene on the couch, a configuration we've seen before: Buck, Chris and Eddie. It could even be the last scene of the season, and that wouldn't surprise me at all!
Just imagine: Buck and Eddie have confessed their feelings to each other, maybe Chris knows, maybe not. The three of them end up on this famous couch. Chris is in the middle, and Buck and Eddie look at each other over him, a smile on their lips.
Everything is fine, they've survived the end of the season disaster, Chris is back, they've finally found each other after years...
What an incredible parallel this would make with the beginning of the season! Where Buck was with Tommy, Chris away from his dad, Eddie depressed...
There, they could finally be happy on the damn couch. I have a very clear vision of this scene and I hope they make it a reality. We need our little Buckley-Diaz family together again. With buddie canon of course.
That's it, you've reached the end of this analysis-theory. I hope you enjoyed it. It took me 3 hours to write and I got lost in other theories, but hey! I had fun.
We're entering a 3-month hiatus so let's try to be kind to each other! Let's share our theories, fanarts, fanfics and edits to make this break a little more enjoyable!
If you want to give your opinion on this theory, you're free to do so here in the comments, or on twitter and bluesky (in both cases, I'm there under @/yamatomee).
Self promo mode, I write fanfics that you can find on AO3 under the username Beezethe! I have one coda about the buddie scene in 8x08, pure angst with no comfort... Feel free to give it a read!
#911abc#911spoilers#911show#buddie#buddiecanon#buck x eddie#evan buckley#eddie diaz#buck buckley#buckley diaz family#christopher diaz#bucktommy this one isn't for you#couch theory#buddie endgame#gay eddie diaz#bi evan buckley#fan theory#911 theory#theory#couch theory is alive and well#buck and eddie
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Honey Sweet Words
One of the many reasons why I love playing a 'good' character while romancing Astarion is you can see how he tries to manipulate the character. It smooth, a smirk here, sway and purr there; but my fav is how he tries to use your words and just adjust them to his idea.
He has so many layers I love him lol
Rated: M
Warnings: manipulation, blood tears, shared vision into each others' trauma
Taglist: @aurasyn
It took you aback, the confusion and uncertainty, his words quick to draw you to his logic. You stood there completely at a loss for words. Is he… Is he manipulating you? "Like a spoonful of honey," You mumbled, "Sweet but thick enough to choke me." Pretty words and Astarion makes a face.
"So much for ambition."
"I won't become my master," Looking at him with a stance of bravery, you weren't going to back out of this. "He wants to control people, to strip them of everything to the marrow. I won't be like him— We don't have to be like them."
"See what I mean? You are too naive, darling." As he fronts concern, your head turns away, "Don't be like that."
"I won't do it. It's wrong."
You do not like having these sorts of talks with Astarion, the battle of morals where Astarion is easily gaining the upper hand. His words cut deep, poking holes into your choice to show you his point of view: control.
Domination.
Astarion groans as your mind unintentionally opens to him, the high amount of emotion from both of them calling out to each other.
You, the fear… The way you were not in control of your actions. A doll, a vampiric doll, for your master's amusement. You were his angel of music perfectly preserved and performing only for him.
Him, the anger… To be forced upon his back over and over for his master. Used and abused, his screams of pain and hatred were so sweet to his master's ears.
Two creatures who know the darkness, who drink crimson, both of whose nature is the very essence of domination and debauchery. A beast that will never be satisfied.
The connection is cut, and you try to stop the red tears that soon spill. Astarion's hands take yours, drawing you close to him. You whimper, the fear of submission to his reasoning… Maybe…
"Will you be satisfied if you controlled it all?" Astarion hears your worry, "What happens if one day I no longer want to be by your side? Will you force me to stay?" Fear that you will always be a captive to a lover who only wants power.
"I am not him." Astarion tries to assure you, lure you with his sweet voice. "But I know you won't leave my side. We balance each other." Do you?
"The power to control people," You shake your head, "We would be just like the monsters who created us."
"I am nothing like Cazador!" He growls in defense, "We are better than them. We can make the realm better– A peaceful world where no one will suffer the way we have." His words are smooth and quick to pull at your naive kind nature.
"By force."
"Anything you want in this realm, anything of worth, is often gained by force, darling."
You shake your head, that isn't right. He kisses those bloody tears away, kisses you, pulls you close then wraps his arms around you while your hands rest on his chest. His lips find yours but move to your neck when you do not return his kiss.
"Astarion."
"(Name)," Saying your name like the lyric to a song he only wants you to hear, a siren song you fall often prey to. "Shh." He hurt you by planting doubt in your mind, yet, it had to be done. It would be a waste of power and he sees this tadpole as the advantage you both need against your master— Sires as you told him.
Never again, never again, never again will he grovel or be forced to submit to Cazador— To anyone.
You should feel the same way. You should.
#reader insert#baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate astarion#baldur's gate astarion#baldur's gate#baldur’s gate 3#baldurs gate 3#baldur's gate 3 astarion#astarion bg3#astarion#astarion x you#astarion x vampire spawn!tav#astarion x tav#astarion x mc#astarion x reader#baldur's gate 3 fanfiction
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The Beauty's Rebirth Prologue
So, this is my first post! This isn't going to be an Aeon x Reader, though I may sprinkle in some scenes of that in the future. I have been cooking this idea since I started playing HSR and I wanted to try writing it out. It will be a yandere type thing so here we go.
TW: Body horror/mod, obsessive behavior, non-con/dub-con touching, implied child abuse, fem!reader, aeons being meanies. Don't like? Don't read. I do not condone or support these behaviors IRL and enjoy!
Prologue (You are here) - Chapter 1 - Chapter 2
"I have a story you might like."
You peek over the schedule you're reading, careful not to move your head as you make eye contact with the woman behind you in the mirror curiously. She seems to notice this as she smiles kindly.
"It was a story all of us were told on my planet growing up. It's about the Aeon Idrila the Beauty. THEY favored my home planet before THEY disappeared"
"Then your planet must be popular with that one group, the Knights of Beauty. Right?"
She makes a face, as if she's tasted or smelled something extremely foul.
"Those Knights hardly visit our planet. When they do, we never tell them anything, and make sure they leave town sooner rather than later."
"Oh. Why? Does it have something to do with the story?"
"It does, would you like to hear it?"
"Well, if you can't tell the Knights, why can you tell me?"
"It's much more interesting than looking at your schedule."
You smile at that faintly. 'Suppose she's right,' you think to yourself.
"I'm all ears."
"Once upon a time, the Aeon of Beauty, Idrila walked the stars. It was said that THEIR beauty outshined all, but I'm sure you know that. What most people don't know about, however, is how THEY disappeared. You see, the other Aeons adored THEIR beauty, just as humans who walked THEIR path did, but the Aeons were capable of things that a human could never do. Yaoshi the Abundance wanted THEIR beauty to live forever in THEIR domain of constant thriving.
It's dark. You're walking and walking, the greenery never stops. It's overflowing
It's growing faster than you can run.
It's trapping you
You can't move.
Four arms cradle your waist while another pair stroke your cheek and comb through your hair as you become a decoration in the greenhouse.
"The Hunt wanted THEM to be THEIR prize for hunting the Abundance."
The plants feel like they've entered your bloodstream.
Your veins have thorns and the flowers have long since covered your eyes.
There's a loud sound of shattering glass and thundering hooves
A cold metal arm grabs you and pulls you up by the waist
You don't realize you're screaming in pain until your mouth is covered
Your veins are shredded
You can feel air forcing itself into your divine lungs
Your eyes are gouged out from the flowers being torn
You are brokenly whimpering on the steed of the being that 'saved' you
"The Elation loved messing with Idrila to see THEM cry."
The voices surround you
Phantom touches come from every angle
You see things that aren't there
You don't know what's real and whats not
Did the extensive healing get to you?
A being of many masks cackles as you cower in a corner
"The Destruction wanted anything that could attempt to challenge THEIR beauty to be destroyed"
You stare into the golden eyes
The fragmented arms held out as if welcoming you to shower in the golden blood
They approach
You grow ill
As the golden threatens to drown you, you run
"When THEY finally ran, THEY realized the true horror of the stars and the greed of those who run them. To be free, THEY called upon THEIR only friend, The Harmony to give THEM a chance at another life…"
Surrounded by darkness you call upon the last of your power and draw out your core
With a steady hand, the steadiest it has been for a long time, you shatter it
Pieces flow into objects around the world
Hairbrushes, mirrors, sewing needles
The one main piece of you looses its golden shine as it floats to the only friend you've ever known, watching with sad eyes
THEY cradle your soul as you fade into nothingness, leaving behind one last wish
'Be free, little beauty.'
"And now, THEY are waiting for THEIR reincarnation, to get THEIR chance at living without fear of… oh my dear are you alright? You look terribly pale!"
You shiver as you blink rapidly.
"I- I'm fine. Just, nerves, and thirst."
The kind hairdresser fetches a bottle of water from the fridge in the dressing room with a straw and watches you drink with steady and slow sips. She then begins to add the final touchups on your hair. As you cradle the water, you try to explain what those, moments in your head were. 'Were they memories? They felt like dreams more than anything. Maybe I have been working too hard.' As you think, she continues.
"And that is why we never tell the Knights of Beauty this. They want to bring THEM back, while we want to leave THEM alone. THEY suffered from THEIR beauty being pursued."
"Huh. Sounds familiar." The memories of you childhood house that never felt like a home, the pain, the torture, the self-hatred, memories you wished would stop coming back.
"Done!"
You look up at your reflection, the intricately styled hairdo frames your face perfectly and matches the violet dress that flows behind you like a waterfall perfectly. Before you get a chance to breathe, your manager opens the door.
"You look great but you've gotta get out there! You're gonna be live in T-minus 3 minutes girl!"
You try to say you need a moment but your tongue gets stuck in your mouth as she drags you down the set and drops you off. She gives you a thumbs up as she runs off and the stage hand next to you waits to give you your cue.
"And now everyone, the moment you've all been waiting for!"
A rich charismatic voice says over the speakers in the sound stage. You see a small video of him standing in front of his desk as he addresses the live audience.
"From rags to riches, this girl has climbed the ranks of the intergalactic fame pyramid faster than anyone. With her looks singlehandedly saving the modeling agency she first signed for, it's no wonder that the press has deemed her the 'Modern-Age Idrila The Beauty!' So put your hands together for the one and only [Y/N]!"
You put on your best smile as you walk out, ignoring the buzzing in your mind that something bad will happen soon. You let the host escort you like one would royalty to the couch as the spotlights blind you. You smile with the pearly whites that everyone adores, knowing that your value to the world is purely from your appearance. That your beauty everyone praises you for is nothing more than a curse.
Live free, Little Beauty.
#yandere#yandere x darling#sunday x reader#aventurine x reader#hsr x reader#yandere hsr#yandere honkai star rail
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- cordyceps | a. anderson
| you use your safe word with abby, and she makes sure to take care of you after.
| content warning: smut at the beginning, reader is nervous to use safe word at first, use of safe word, pet names (sweetheart, baby, sweet girl), mainly fluff, smut under the cut
| wc: 718
It felt like you couldn’t breathe. Your face was planted in a pillow, and if it wasn’t for Abby’s strong arm wrapped around your hips, you’re sure they would be on the bed as well. You’ve been going for about two hours now. Abby had worked you over with her fingers, her tongue, twice, and now she had you on her strap. You were tired, but you didn’t want to disappoint her. You knew she loved to play with you, to see how many times she could get you to cum, and in your fuzzy headspace, it felt like you couldn’t tell her that it had been enough.
“Fuck, you look so pretty like this. You’re all cockdrunk, huh? Yeah, I bet it feels good, doesn’t it, baby?” Abby says, breaking you out of your thoughts.
You mumble something into the pillow.
“What? Speak up, sweetheart.” Abby demands, her voice slightly unsteady due to the speed of her hips jackhammering into yours.
“Cordyceps.” you gasp out.
Abby’s heart stops at the same time her hips do. Since she liked to have her way with you, she knew she needed a way to tell her that it was enough and that you couldn’t take anymore. She had found some books in the library about safe words, and set one up with you the next time she saw you.
“Alright, okay. Fuck, I’m sorry. I’m gonna take it out now, okay?” she says softly.
Even though she warned you, you couldn’t stop the yelp that came out when you felt the fake cock drag out of your walls. Abby lowers your hips to the bed, and leaves to get, what you assume, will be something to clean you up. You lay on the mattress, unmoving. Abby comes back with a damp towel, and when she starts to clean your sensitive pussy, you let out a groan at the pain.
“I’m sorry, baby. I just need t’clean you real quick, okay? Can you be a big girl for a little bit longer?” she coos, brushing your hair off of your sweaty forehead. She doesn’t start cleaning again until you give her a quick nod. She moves as fast as she can without hurting you too much.
Once she’s done, she crawls in your joint bed, pulling your fatigued body on top of her chest. You look up at her, and your eyes quickly fill with tears.
“M’sorry, Abs.”
“Don’t be silly, sweet girl. Nothing to be sorry for.” Abby says, wiping a stray tear off of your cheek.
You stay like that for a while. Your chest to Abby’s, trying to steady your breathing. Abby, rubbing a hand up and down your back.
“Do you wanna tell me what happened?” she says, not stopping the soothing strokes to your back.
You look up at her again, her gray eyes already looking down at you.
“Just got too much. Felt like I couldn’t breathe, and it was starting to hurt, I guess. God, I’m sorry.” You cringe at your words, sitting up and bringing your knees to your chest, burying your head into them.
Even though she read about the safewords, Abby wasn’t exactly sure what to do when you actually used one. She rubbed one of your calves, trying to console you while she thought of what to say.
“I’m not mad at you, or anything like that. I’m happy you felt safe enough to tell me, yeah?” she says gently. “Can I see your pretty face, please?”
You remove your face from the safety of your knees, and Abby frowns when she sees your glassy eyes. You give her a small smile, and move back on top of her, taking a few seconds to get comfortable again.
“M’not mad at you either, you didn’t do anything wrong.” you whisper, and you can feel Abby release a long breath.
“Think you can walk?” she asks.
You groan as you try to even fathom using your legs.
“Why?” you ask, drawing out the ‘y’.
“Cause we both smell, we need to take a shower.” she says, leaning down to kiss the top of your head.
You let out a small giggle, and hear Abby’s laugh ripple through her chest. You don’t make any effort to move, though.
Abby lets out a sigh, “Alright, c’mon. I’ll carry ya.”
#abby anderson x reader#abby anderson fluff#abby anderson#abby !#abby anderson smut#abby anderson fic
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