#Who do you think would be a good fit for this society?
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0. I "repeat myself" because you repeat the same lies over and over again. My answers won't change unless your lies do.
1. Except January 6th doesn't just fit the blanket definition of an insurrection, it fits the definition that's implied and inferred under federal law. The term insurrection is never defined in US law. Since it was a violent uprising against the government. January 6th is OBJECTIVELY AN INSURRECTION. And now amount of denial from you people (trump supporters) will change this fact.
2. I understand the difference and have literally explained it. An insurrection is a violent uprising against an authority (most commonly a government), and a coup is the unlawful seizure of power from a government. January 6th is an insurrection because it was a violent uprising against the US government. January 6th was not a coup because they failed to illegally seize power from the government and prevent the peaceful transfer of power. January 6th is an insurrection but only an attempted/failed coup.
3. I didn't nullify any point. I pointed out how despite the general definition of the term insurrection being applicable to a wide number of things, both the general definition and the commonly agreed upon legal definition apply to January 6th. Even under the most reserved definition of an insurrection, January 6th is still an insurrection.
4. You people as in trump supporters. Not that hard to understand. Heavily implied even.
5. I do have a basis considering you perpetuated 3 easily refutable lies about them.
Plus the antifascist movement is not made of "real actual Nazis". Read up on the paradox of Intolerance. Society should not extend tolerance to the intolerant, because the intolerant would eventually dominate and wipe out tolerant. The most tolerant of people should and must be intolerant of people who identify as Nazis.
Even though the antifascist movement engages in political violence and censorship, it's mostly good since they almost exclusively target neo Nazis, people who already engage in political violence and censorship. They just treat them with their own medicine.
It's OKAY to oppress self identified Nazis, since Nazis want to oppress (and kill) YOU.
You cannot and should not peacefully accept the political existence of those who want you oppressed, silenced, and dead. And labeling the antifascist movement as evil for treating neo Nazis how they try to treat others is like shaming a child for grabbing his father's belt.
6. Some officers were severely beaten and it's well documented.
There may not be video proof of officers slipping in blood, but more than just Edwards has claimed it.
They opened more doors do avoid a stampede, which is a perfect valid reasons since one of the people who died that day was literally crushed in a stampede, and there easily could have been more if they didn't open more doors.
I think you're glossing over the fact that the first doors weren't opened by staff, they were opened by people who BROKE IN. Officers never "invited" anyone in. They opened more doors for safety reasons after people had already begun flooding the building.
7. It's not an error and I'm not lying.
It's well documented that there were still Congress members on the house floor when Babbit was shot because they weren't done evacuating yet, despite what you have claimed about the floor being empty except for the guards.
It's well documented that Byrd did warn Babbit that he would shoot her if she didn't stand down multiple times.
Video of the shooting shows that Byrd only fired a single shot at Babbit, who was the only person he could clearly shoot and did not fire "blindly into a group of people" as you have claimed.
The very nature of Babbit trying to break down a barricade separating the house floor and the members on it from a group of potentialy violent rioters was enough for Byrd's decision to be considered self defense.
Babbit endangered every guard and Congress member there with her actions, and her own inability to stand down and follow directions even when being justifiably held a gunpoint was the reason she lost her life.
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It's an open notes test and some dense motherfuckers still can't figure out the answers.
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steddieas-shegoes · 11 hours ago
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if you fall, i will catch you
for @steddielovemonth day 2 using Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper
rated t | 855 words | no cw | tags: high school, prom, slow dance, flirting, open ending but assumed getting together
🪩🕺💃🪩🕺💃🪩🕺💃🪩💃🕺🪩
Prom is stupid.
Steve didn’t even want to come. He didn’t have a date and nothing is more embarrassing than showing up to prom alone. Even the nerds come as a group, dancing and laughing together.
His mom made an appointment for his suit fitting and he couldn’t really explain to her that there was no need. She still thinks he and Nancy are on track to be married when Nancy graduates high school. He doesn’t know how to tell her that he’ll probably die alone.
Okay, that’s a little dramatic. He’s probably not gonna die alone.
But he may die unhappy, and that’s worse.
Most of the music hasn’t been terrible so far, at least. Only one slow song played and no one seemed interested in dancing to it.
Steve’s a fucking wallflower at his own prom. He never saw this coming.
He figures he could probably escape within the next few songs, no one would even notice his absence. He makes a mental plan to wait until one of the parent chaperones walks back to the other side of the room.
Then he’s off.
He manages to escape to the hall behind the gym, the one that leads to the auditorium and drama class, not the main building of the school. No one should be back here. It’s the perfect escape route.
“Never thought I’d see the day when King Steve is trying to escape prom,” a voice says from the end of the hall. The music from the gym is echoing in here, but the voice is much louder. It’s familiar, too. “Miss Wheeler too busy with Byers to dance?”
It’s Munson. Steve sighs.
“Why are you even here?”
“It’s my senior prom, too! Or should those of us not graduating not be allowed?” Eddie walks closer and Steve sees that he’s actually dressed up. It’s not a designer suit like he’s been forced into, but it’s nice. Eddie looks…nice.
“Wait,” Steve registers what he actually said. “Not graduating?”
“Yep. Apparently quadratic formulas are crucial to my development and I cannot enter society until I understand them.” Eddie kicks his foot across the tile, leaving a scuff mark from shoes that have probably been waxed beyond necessity. “And I guess dissecting a frog and turning in homework may have helped.”
“But aren’t you pretty smart?” Steve thought he was one of those dungeon dweebs like Dustin. Dustin’s the smartest person he knows, without a doubt, kid or not. He thought all the nerds who play that game were like that.
“Sure, I’m smart enough,” Eddie scoffs. “But I don’t play by their rules. I forget to do homework. I argue.”
“But if you know the stuff, they can’t fail you.”
“Ah, but they can. I don’t have the Harrington name to convince them to change a D to a C. It’s all good. Everyone expected it.”
Steve’s brows furrow, forehead creasing as he thinks about how many things people expected of him that won’t happen.
“Just because people expect it doesn’t mean you have to give it to them,” he says.
Eddie’s eyes widen and he seems shocked by Steve’s words. But the shock wears off quickly. Steve wonders if he imagined it.
“Right you are! Very wise words from the king,” Eddie bows dramatically.
Steve laughs.
Eddie glances up, tense until he realizes Steve’s not laughing at him, just at the entertainment. He stands straight and holds out his hand.
“I do believe such wise words should be repaid with a dance,” Eddie puts on a fake British accent, nose pointed to the sky, smirk playing on his lips.
Steve thinks this must be what it’s like to be charmed by someone.
“A dance?” Steve asks. “Here? With me?”
“It would be my honor,” Eddie loses the accent and turns his head back down so he’s looking right at Steve’s eyes. “Miss Lauper wrote this song just for us, after all.”
Steve’s confusion grows until he hears the song coming from the gym. He can only imagine how awkward it must be in the gym while some couples slow dance with chaperones watching their every breath. He reaches out and takes Eddie’s hand.
“The honor is mine, sir Munson,” Steve tries for an accent like Eddie had previously, but it falls flat.
Eddie pulls him close, but hesitates before he puts an arm around his waist. Steve feels breathless all of a sudden, like they’ve rocketed into space and he forgot one of those astronaut suits. He nods, giving permission for Eddie to take the lead.
When Eddie pulls him closer, they’re almost flush against each other.
Steve’s heart is racing.
“I didn’t know you were weird,” Eddie admits quietly. It sounds a lot like admiration. He’s swaying them back and forth gently, and Steve finds it’s easy to lose track of everything but the way Eddie’s hands rest on his body. “It’s nice to see you, Steve.”
It’s a lot more than what it sounds like.
As Cyndi Lauper plays, Steve wonders if this is how his prom was always meant to be spent: in Eddie Munson’s arms, falling.
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meadowfics · 1 day ago
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meet me down on polk street
cho hyun-ju x f!woc!reader
in which you find your girlfriend during a harsh period within society
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this will be a series that is based in america during the 1960s. after coming out as a trans woman back in south korea, hyun ju moves far away to california and meets who will be the love of her life.. y/n l/n.
warnings: harsh mentions of transphobia, harsh mentions of homophobia, harsh mentions of racism. there is NO squid game in this au, well at least in the 1960s!! y/n is intended to be a woman of color to fit within the storyline of how her and hyun-ju connect, but anyone can read this!!
next chapter will be linked here
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its march 1967.. the air in seoul felt heavy, thick even. 
hyun ju had spent years carrying the burden of silence, pressing herself into a mold that never fit. the special forces had demanded discipline, obedience, and above all, unwavering masculinity. 
she had learned to march, to fire a rifle, to bark commands with a voice deeper than what felt natural. none of it changed the fact that, beneath the uniform, beneath the rigid posture and sharp salutes, she had always been a woman.  
resignation had been the easy part. 
telling her parents had been the war, not even close battles with the north side of the peninsula caused her to be this tense.  
“why did you leave?” her mother’s voice had been tight, worried. hyun ju had never given them reason to doubt her before. she had always done what was expected. good grades. respectable career. 
she had honored the family name. 
and now, she had thrown it away.  
hyun ju had prepared herself for this conversation for years, whispering the words in the quiet of her barracks, in the mirror of public restrooms where she dared to see her reflection as she truly was. 
nothing could have prepared her for the way her father’s face twisted, his knuckles whitening as he gripped the table.  
“i left,” she had begun, keeping her voice steady despite the tremor in her chest, “because i am not who you think i am.”  
her mother’s brows furrowed. 
“what do you mean?”  
“i have never been your son,” hyun ju said, carefully, precisely. 
“i– i am your daughter.”  
silence. the kind that suffocates, that presses against your ribs until it hurts to breathe.  
hyun ju’s mother’s lips parted, but no words came out. her father, however, did not hesitate.  
“are you sick?” his voice was sharp, cutting through the quiet like a knife.  
hyun ju clenched her fists under the table.
“no.”  
“this is nonsense,” her mother finally spoke, her voice a whisper, as if even acknowledging hyun ju’s words would bring shame upon their household.  
hyun ju had expected confusion. perhaps even denial. 
nothing could have prepared her for the disgust in her father’s eyes.  
“you are not my daughter,” he spat, rising to his feet so abruptly that the chair scraped against the floor. 
“you are delusional. sick in the head.”  
hyun ju felt something inside her fracture, a deep, aching wound that she knew would never heal.  
“you need help,” her mother said softly, eyes pleading.  
help. as if this was something to fix. as if she hadn’t spent her entire life trying to be something she wasn’t.  
hyun ju stood. she didn’t argue. didn’t beg them to understand. there was no point.  
“i will be leaving,” she said instead, voice hollow.  
hyun ju’s mother reached out, as if to stop her, but her father’s glare made her hesitate.  
“where will you go?” her mother asked.  
hyun ju swallowed. 
“somewhere i can be myself.”  
she left that night with only a small suitcase and the cash she had saved.  
for a week, she stayed in a hotel, staring out the window at a city that had never truly been hers. seoul was home, but it was also a cage. she wandered through familiar streets with unfamiliar freedom, but the loneliness settled into her bones, heavy and unshakable.  
the loneliness was suffocating.
hyun ju had spent her entire life feeling like a stranger in her own skin, but now, sitting alone in the dimly lit hotel room, staring at the ceiling, she felt like a stranger in the world itself.
the walls around her were bare, just like the space inside her chest. the bed, stiff and unwelcoming, felt foreign beneath her. no warmth, no familiarity. just a place to rest her body while her mind spiraled into a place she was afraid of.
not even the beds in those cold military barracks felt this hard. 
hyun ju needed to leave. she knew this in her bones, just as she had always known who she was. even as she clung to that certainty, another part of her whispered doubts, wrapping around her thoughts like ivy.
was she ready for this?
was she truly prepared to step into the unknown, to carve out a life for herself in a place she had never seen, surrounded by people she had never met?
hyun ju’s parents' rejection had cut deep, deeper than she would ever admit. it wasn’t just their words, but the finality of it. the way her father’s face twisted in disgust, as if the years she had spent as their child had been erased in an instant. the way her mother looked through her instead of at her.
they would not come looking for her.
she had no one left.
how was anyone supposed to love her if her parents did not?
the thought made her stomach twist, nausea creeping up her throat.
she pressed her fingers against her temples, breathing in sharply. she couldn’t let herself break down. not yet.
outside the window, the streets of seoul were alive with movement. people bustled past each other, heading home from work, gathering at food stalls, laughing, talking, living.
she had spent years moving through these streets, blending in, becoming just another face in the crowd.
she had never belonged.
the weight of expectation had pressed down on her shoulders for as long as she could remember. the uniform she had worn in the military had been a costume, a lie draped over her body, suffocating her every time she was called by a name that wasn’t hers.
hyun ju has grown her hair out for the last year. some thought it was just due to not having many barbers in the special forces. no. 
the woman took in the fact that her silky hair has finally reached her shoulders. she still wore slacks and a button up that made her feel uncomfortable, but it will due for now.
five days after leaving home.. it was the morning time when she stopped at a newspaper stand.
little did she know, that newspaper stand will guide her in the next direction  
the headline caught her eye.  
"san francisco: a city of outcasts? the rise of the homosexual community in america.” 
she picked up the paper, scanning the article. it was written with thinly veiled disgust, detailing how “deviants” had begun gathering in san francisco, forming their own communities, living openly, unashamed.  
hyun ju exhaled sharply. she wasn’t sure if it was relief or fear pounding in her chest.  
a place where people like her could exist.  
she had heard whispers before, stories of american cities where people defied the rules, where they didn’t have to hide.  
san francisco.  
it was far. farther than she had ever imagined going. however, it was on the other side of the pacific. 
she had enough money to get there, maybe take the ferry to japan and then a plane from there.  
hyun ju folded the paper under her arm and walked back to her hotel, her steps lighter than they had been in years.  
for the first time in her life, she had a destination.
to you, virginia had never felt like home. not really. it had been familiar, yes..predictable, routine. the kind of place where everyone knew everyone’s name, where sunday mornings were spent in church, where girls were raised to become wives, not dreamers.  
you had always known you were different.  
you grew up knowing the rules, watching your mother press your father’s shirts, hearing your grandmother’s hushed whispers about the girl down the street who had never married, the pity in their voices like a warning. but you never wanted that life. 
you never wanted to settle into a house with a husband you barely loved, to push a stroller while you stared longingly at women in ways you weren’t supposed to.  
so you had left. gone to college. the first woman in your family to do so.  
it was there, in the winding brick paths and ivy-covered buildings of virginia tech, that you met jane.  
jane had been everything you had secretly longed for. confident, smart, sharp-tongued in a way that made your stomach flutter. she is the only other woman of color on this side of campus.. besides you.
jane was the kind of girl who smoked cigarettes on dorm balconies, who read poetry with a knowing smirk, who pulled you into late-night conversations about philosophy and literature and the way women in books seemed to glow like something untouchable.  
you thought that your relatability with the woman would bring you closer to her.
however, jane had never been for you.  
you realized it too late.  
the confession had been a mistake.  
“i love you, jane,” you had said, your voice small, shaking.  
jane had laughed at first. like it was a joke.  
then you met her eyes, desperate, pleading. and everything shifted.  
jane’s face twisted, disgust flashing across her features so fast that you barely had time to process it.  
“you’re a freak.”  
the words hit like a slap.  
jane took a step back, as if you were something dirty, something unnatural.  
“i was not aware that you were a mentally ill lesbian,” she spat, voice dripping with venom.  
you couldn’t breathe.  
the words echoed. over and over and over.  
then everyone knew.  
the rumors spread like wildfire. whispers in the halls, lingering stares in the dining hall, notes left on your dorm room door with slurs you couldn’t bring yourself to read.  
your parents found out within the week.  
the disappointment in their voices was worse than the hatred.  
“what did we do wrong?” your mother sobbed into the phone.  
your father said nothing at all.  
it was over.  
there was nothing left for you here.  
so you left in the middle of the night, stuffing clothes into a bag, emptying the $1,000 you had saved into your pockets.  
you didn’t know where you were going. only that you had to go.  
after weeks of hitchhiking.. you ended up in san francisco.  
the city felt like something out of a dream. something that you have only heard about through newspapers. loud, sprawling, alive in a way virginia never had been.  
you settled into a tiny apartment on the north side of polk street, barely big enough to fit the life you were trying to rebuild.  
it wasn’t much. though it was yours.  
you found a job…secretary work, nothing glamorous, but enough to keep you afloat.  
the days blurred together. work, home, sleep.  
but the nights—  
the nights were different.  
tonight, the air is warm, thick with the scent of cigarettes and city life.  
you walk down polk street, the heels of your shoes clicking softly against the pavement. you’re tired from the day, your blouse slightly wrinkled, but something in your chest feels lighter than usual.  
you’re just two blocks from home when you see them.  
a group of men…laughing, smiling, holding hands.  
they’re beautiful. some of them are wearing pink, their faces painted with eyeliner and rouge. others are in silk blouses, skirts, heels taller than yours.  
they belong to each other.  
for the first time in what feels like forever, you don’t feel so alone.  
you catch the eye of one of them, a boy with soft curls and glitter dusted over his cheekbones. you offer him a small smile, lifting your chin just slightly…subtle, but enough.  
a signal.  
me too.  
he grins, his gaze lingering with a smile just long enough before he turns back to his friends.  
you follow their laughter to the front of a bar.  
black cat bar.
you stare at the purple neon glowing sign, your fingers twitching at your sides.  
you’ve never been inside a place like this.  
maybe this is where you were supposed to go next.  
maybe this is where you will finally start to feel like yourself.  
you take a deep breath, stepping forward toward the line.  
little do you know—  
there is a woman just a few steps ahead of you, a woman in a dress, her dark hair falling just past her shoulders.  
a woman with nervous hands and hopeful eyes.  
a woman who has run just as far as you have.  
hyun ju.
next part coming very soon
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multi-fandom-imagine · 21 hours ago
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𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 || 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐥𝐞𝐲 𝐏𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 ||
A/n: Reader is Pacifica (can be biological or not, looks are not described)
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Stan wasn’t proud of it, but he was staring. Hard.
It wasn’t like he meant to—hell, he’d braced himself for a lot of things when he saw Y/N Northwest again. Shock, fear, maybe even that cool, detached scrutiny you were so damn good at. But this? This he hadn’t been prepared for.
You stood before him, poised as ever, your hair swept into an elaborate style that left a few elegant curls cascading over your shoulder. The deep emerald of your gown hugged your figure in a way that made something in Stan’s stone chest tighten, the rich fabric shimmering faintly under the dim lights of the forest clearing. Every movement was deliberate, controlled, effortless.
God, you moved like a queen.
And maybe that was what did it. The way you carried yourself—like you owned the ground you walked on, like you knew you could command attention with the smallest of gestures. Stan had spent a lifetime bullshitting his way through high society, tricking people into thinking he belonged in places he had no business being. But You? You didn’t try to fit in—you just did.
And it was really messing with him.
Stan shifted, trying to ignore the way his wings twitched involuntarily behind him. He was a seven-foot-tall gargoyle, for crying out loud. He had claws, fangs, glowing eyes, and actual wings. He was supposed to be the intimidating one here.
But you? You just looked at him like he was something worth admiring.
“Y’know, I don’t get it,” Stan muttered, trying so hard to sound casual, even as he felt the heat creeping up his neck (could gargoyles even blush? Because it sure as hell felt like he was blushing). “Most people would take one look at me and run the other way. But you? You’re lookin’ at me like I just walked outta some fancy cathedral.”
You tilted your head slightly, considering him, and damn if that didn’t make something in his stomach flip.
“Maybe that’s because you remind me of something ancient and enduring,” you said, stepping closer. The faintest, knowing smile played at your lips. “Something carved from stone, meant to watch over and protect.”
Stan swallowed hard. “You’re makin�� it sound a whole lot prettier than it is, sweetheart.”
You hummed, your gaze slowly trailing over him, taking in the rough texture of his arms, the faint glow of his amber eyes, the massive span of his wings. And then—because apparently you had no mercy— reached out and traced a slow line along his bicep with your fingertips.
Stan tensed. His heart, which he was pretty sure shouldn’t even beating right now, did something very stupid.
“You don’t see it, do you?” You murmured, your touch feather-light against the cracks in his stone skin. “How powerful you look. How striking.” You let your fingers trail down to the edge of his forearm before finally pulling away. Biting your lip, you ran your tongue slowly over your lip. "How strong."
Stan exhaled through his nose, loudly. “Lady, if you keep talkin’ like that, I’m gonna start thinkin’ you got a thing for scary monsters.”
You smirked, your eyes practically glowing with mischief. “Who says I don’t?”
Stan’s wings jerked back in an involuntary flick, and he immediately scowled, stepping away before you gave him too many feelings at once.
“Alright, that’s enough of that,” he grumbled, crossing his arms over his very solid, very stone chest in a weak attempt to regain control. “Next thing I know, you’re gonna start gettin’ ideas about climbin’ onto my back and ridin’ around like some kinda fairytale princess.”
You raised an eyebrow. “Would you let me?” You got close as you possibly could to the man, your hand on his chest batting your eyelashes up at him.
Stan choked.
Meanwhile, hidden behind a very inadequate hiding spot, Mabel was vibrating with pure joy, clutching Pacifica’s arm.
“I told you!” she whisper-shouted. “She’s totally into the monster thing!”
Pacifica, who had not been prepared for this, groaned. “Great. Now I have to live with the knowledge that my elegant aunt is flirting with a gargoyle.”
Mabel grinned, eyes shining. “You’re welcome.”
Pacifica let out another groan, wondering why she was friends with Mable.
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quibbs126 · 3 days ago
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Okay, I admit, the art ain’t the best, this is like a first draft and it definitely needs more tweaking, but I had a thought, so I went and drew it
This thought came because I was really bored and went to go get a book from the library, and while I was doing so, listening to a song I heard on a Mega Man X speedpaint, my brain was like “what if you crossed over Transformers with Mega Man?” And then I figured I fight as well draw that when I got back
I should note though, that I know very little about Mega Man, or X, which the style is more based on. I’ve played like, a tiny bit of one game and I heard some of the lore years ago. So sorry to Mega Man fans
But yeah, so this is what I made, basically Optimus and Megatron in a more Mega Man style, though with some tweaks because I didn’t want to make them look entirely human
Like I said above, I know the art isn’t great. I learned through this that I have seemingly forgotten how proportions work, and also I don’t know how to draw waist down anymore. I need to work on that
I’d say this needs a few more tries before I get it right, and definitely more practice. Some more actual looking at the style of Mega Man/X would probably do me some good as well
I was considering just showing it to you in sketch form, since I knew it wouldn’t turn out great, but I figured I might as well power through for a little bit more effort
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But I think the designs are fine? At least, coming from someone with little Mega Man knowledge? They still need more work, but they aren’t horrible
Anyways, on to more thoughts on this story in general
I think they still transform, just maybe not into the same style of vehicles they do in normal Transformers. Maybe a bit more simplified and cartoonish, I don’t know. I’ll have to work that out
Also Optimus is supposed to have an axe here, sort of in the same vein as Zero’s sword, I just didn’t feel like drawing it. I don’t know if Megatron’s laser arm is retractable or not
As for their roles? I’m not really sure. I want to say these two are sort of like cops, in a similar vein to the Maverick Hunters in X. But that’s probably also because I’m imagining Zero and X, and I don’t know if it fits them
But for now, I suppose that’s what Optimus and Megatron are here. They live on a different version of Cybertron, and they’re partners who work in some form of law enforcement that deals with out of control Transformers
Not sure what the details of this situation are though. Whether this is them before their split and something in their work causes them to switch sides and Megatron to go rogue and start his own faction, or if this is after the war has ended and the two are working to deal with Transformers who refuse to stop fighting and causing harm for the rebuilding Cybertronian society
But I thought the idea seemed neat, and I have finished drawing it, so here you are
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frogonamelon · 5 months ago
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Hello! Hear me out: What if... Harding-Pencroft Academy au?
After their adventures in Gravity Falls, the Pines Twins found a club at their new school, Harding Pencroft Academy in order to discover, document, and study the strange. Over time, it grows and begins to lean otherworldly as others join the society.
I don't really have a linear story in mind for this, but I do see the twins eventually falling into a mentor role as upperclassmen. They've been around the block many times (returning to Gravity Falls every summer since) and are the oldest and founders of the club.
The original post if you're interested (with some other potential characters)
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bowsbar · 5 months ago
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pillowbook thoughts because ive been thinking about them all day!
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tenwhiteandalusians · 1 month ago
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pertaining to the idea of tenax’s band of strays i do think it’s touching that the kids are the ones who saved him and waited outside the door to make sure he’s okay. for all tenax claims to be harsh and cruel it’s a fine indicator of his character that the kids won’t rest without him and are there every time he’s in danger.
#AND I CAN’T FUCKING BELIEVE I HAD THEM STEALING THEIR WAY OMTO#THE PLATFORMS WHAT DO YOU MEANNNNNNN oh i love being right#also that all the kids are there watching when he kills the guy whose name i forget because i simply cannot hold names in my brain but the#evil one. who i was like oh thank GOD he died i was so sick of this plot he kept killing everyone & i screeched when he almost got claudia#something something calla saying ‘you’re not a child anymore’ about tenax’s cruelty to the brothers (which in my twisted narratives. sorry.#there’s only one scorpus who KNEW the child tenax was. the child he’s still healing and caring for. all of the children whose eyes he looks#into and sees a hurt that’s just like his? the children tenax saved whether he’ll admit it or not? scorpus saved him. and that’s all)#(also this is a terrible thing to say i knew it about but like. oh i knew it about the master of the house. tenax making sure NO ONE#touches the kids or does anything with them really but Claudia and him—the people he trusts which also now includes calla but he makes sure#it’s someone he knows. also do we have a claudia backstory??? or would i just get to invent a reason why she’s there and what she’s doing#and why she’s so loyal to tenax. did she also see the child he was and that’s why she’s so protective of him but also why she gets along#with calla so well because the two of them see how he’s festered in that. like calla fully has the rights here i think she should rip him a#new one for his lack of decency and good qualities he can be corrupt without being cruel y’know. and he should be called out on his#peter pan ass behavior you’re not a child!! there are such consequences!!! dream a little bigger a little kinder!!! change the dream you#made up with scorpus when you were a young angry teenager and make it fit who you are NOW. the life you want NOW not the life you thought#you should have & deserved. what did you learn from growing up. what changed. what do you need now & what do you want. not the same things#and i too wish that this was 30k and covered their entire backstory#BUT IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION of i also need it to be 100k canon-divergent (presumably. i’m only through episode eight. but i can’t imagine#that they will follow the plot EYE would write because they need to have a second season & you can’t have that without conflict which means#titus overthrown scorpus is gonna die metaphorically or literally etc etc the gold faction in shambles but technically triumphant with#domitian on the throne and tenax in a position of patrician power accepted into their society but still not equal and happy. whereas lmao#domitian you’re getting shipped off to some other city because your plot to overthrow titus failed and yet he is merciful enough he won’t#kill you he just sends you and hermes together (at which point over the months long journey you forgive and re-learn each other bc titus#didn’t know of the betrayal he thought it would be kind to send your (ex-)lover with you. do we see how this works perfectly) & tenax falls#back into the underworld where he now knows he belongs because blood is everything except when it isn’t. when he realizes what he has is#worth more. no matter if the blood he has is tainted or patrician the blood oath he swore with scorpus iron on their tongues means more.#calla’s split lip defending him and their winnings. kwaame’s blood on the hard packed sand of the arena fighting to stay alive and to come#home to them. the fire in aura’s cheeks when she laughs at ivy. SURPRISEEEE EVERY NARRATIVE IS A FOUND FAMILY I GUESS IT SPRUNG ON ME TOO.#and tenax doesn’t mind a little dirt and bribery every now and then. doesn’t aspire to former heights and shining brilliant out of shadows.#the gaudiness of gold &flash of fools’ dreams. YES CAN I FINALLY PLS GET MY BLACK FACTION TO REPLACE THE ILL-FATED GOLD THATLL COLLAPSE W/D
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crossbackpoke-check · 2 months ago
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Sat politely ankles crossed hands folded please say you have more thoughts about the DC deweys. Lazarus pit cold-eyed stare pristine and bloodthirsty anyway I would love to hear any further thoughts if you have the time + energy + motivation
how i imagine you waiting for me to re-read the resurrection of ra’s al-ghul and hush vol. 1+2:
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ALRIGHT. in no particular order, thoughts about the dc deweys
connor fits very well into the mold of a talia al-ghul for me; chip on his shoulder, femme fatale, deadly and precise. he’s not the loudest but he’s got a dry wit that’ll cut you!
“why is connor an al-ghul at all and not batman” well first of all he’s already got the water connection, i’m gonna go dip him into the lake a couple hours north of the pas to make him incredibly long-lived, rejuvenated and beautiful
second of all i want him to be a questionable villain/antihero because he looks evil in those pictures but like beautiful evil. you see him at a multi-million dollar soirée and he’s bored of being there wearing his “heritage” beads and jewels he originally had from a thousand years ago. he and his assassins are only here to murder the head of state who’s planning to lay a pipeline through ancestral grounds
rip brandon duhaime i simply cannot imagine you as any kind of batman. lacks the gravitas, too much of a yapper, loves his wife too much. i curse thee to be green arrow if you’re in this narrative at all
assuming connor stays with toronto, would LOVE to think about toronto as one of the sites of the lazarus pit for many reasons
(a brief aside here to say that for me personally this is interesting if connor goes to winnipeg because i think they suit him better, he’s a manitoba boy, but re: the chip on his shoulder, he’s NOT a manitoba boy. he’s from the pas and very proud of it)
a) the amount of ‘toronto is the center of the universe’ hockey creation myths i can play with & birth/rebirth/reincarnation. if you WANT to feel unhinged trying to blend hockey and comics is an ice rink not just a pool of water?
b) mr. cathal kelly i love your works!!! toronto eats its young!!! thinking about this very literally in the sense of the resurrection arc where players come to toronto and are sacrificed, give up their body, their skill, in service of the demon’s head, and lose themselves.
c) we see echos of the same narratives and styles over and over again—if i can hop over to the flyers for a second, there is of course the curse of the *8s (18 richards, 28 claude, 48 danny b, 68 nolan, 88 lindros) but ALSO the danny brière -> tk -> morgan frost celly chain. every generation a resurrection, emerging clean and new from the pit
can you just briefly hold my hand and imagine wayne gretzky as an evil ra’s al-ghul wanting to possess a new body. gretzky i’m sorry to malign you and i know you never played in toronto but you are the best player in my head to fit the idea, i’m open to other suggestions
coming BACK to green arrow dewey (i did not re-watch arrow or re-read those comics sorry) connor could also be black canary, who takes a brief dip into the lazarus pit (toronto) before getting married to oliver. i do like that narrative but because we were talking about pristine and cold-blooded i figured connor dewar head of the league of assassins was more what you were after
now that i’ve gotten through world building… choose your own adventure narratives?
hockey-ish au: connor chosen as a host for the Next One. i think the lineage of the great one -> next one -> next next one -> next one up of gretzky -> crosby -> mcdavid -> bedard is taken, BUT i can imagine that the league of old boys all have the same intentions. connor gets sent to toronto unknowingly being prepped to get body-snatched by ???? and brandon duhaime of course accidentally stumbles on the plot and they have to fight to stop it
connor assassinating people :) snapshot of the head of the league of assassins delegating which major world events they’re going to change today. would love his shark face from the gifset to have blood spattered across it, ideally.
version 1 as head of the league of assassins: brandon is one of his assassins, big strong bodyguard type. devoted to him, would lay down his life, perfectly designed for connor (lady shiva/cassandra cain-ish). connor orders for something to be done and brandon does it there for him then gently wipes the blood off his face and apologizes for being careless and getting him messy.
version 2 as head of the league of assassins: an actual plot where connor aims to assassinate SOMEONE but brandon gets in the way. they meet at odds as their respective roles (hero, leader of a crime syndicate) but are magnetically drawn together as their alter egos. eventually brandon puts together the pieces of the Big Evil and manages to (legally!-ish as much as vigilante-ism can be legal) take it down and the ending panels show a tentative friendship and recognition of potential shared goals
also, jaromir jágr is immortal. don’t know if this is relevant OR related but he is. personal hot spring lazarus pit?
um. thanks for coming to my 1.5k ted talk (including tags). what a way to moritz seider lore drop that i DID grow up a comic book nerd, lmao. thank you so much for enabling me <3 i'll be here all week thinking about which teams would get what rings in a blackest night au
#contrary to popular belief (guy whose brain is like ‘but we already wrote the fic!’ any time they try to write with an actual outline)#[also i know what i said but i CAN write with an outline it just tends to be for y'know. not fic. (research and thesis papers lol)]#i DO actually know how to write up storyboards for comics & could in theory do a story if someone wanted to draw. or do a ‘zine dewey first#meeting comic because i’ve become enamored with the soirée scene i made up. also i want connor emerging dripping wet out of the slime#like it’s a nice wet bath the way they draw comic book girls framed ever-so-carefully to not show anything too provocative#both of those things can exist simultaneously if you want it bad enough. simultaneous mirrored panels of dewey1 fighting crime hours before#the soiree and getting consistent updates that he's going to be late so and so is arriving so and so will be there (OH I HAVE JUST DECIDED#THAT IT WILL BE HOSTED AT HIS ESTATE/CORPORATION DUH) and he's in the process of breaking up a drug deal chasing guys down & then sprinting#back brief shower with the pool of dirt and blood under his feet &slipping into his cufflinks his loosely buttoned shirt tucking his chains#under the collar gel on his hands cologne on his neck & swanning in late but he's precisely on time because he gets there RIGHT when connor#does too because this whole time we see the parallel panels of brandon stepping out of the darkness to reveal the green arrow mask & connor#stepping down iNTO darkness already done covered in blood & scratches the not-sexy but sexy drop of all his clothes where you see the#silhouette of his back (can't tell if i want this to be a direct parallel of brandon getting into the shower OR because what i haven't said#yet is that this is both of them in opposite -> they are simultaneously stripping & re-making themselves somewhat literally for connor but#it's taking OFF the green arrow for brandon to be his “true” self / connor stripping off his title as the demon's head (his “true” self) to#be connor dewar the act of polite high society &the implications in both that we see them taking off one skin and putting another on. which#one is real. brandon thinking duhaime the billionaire playboy is real vs connor thinking the dewar heir is the act&do they switch/challenge#each other throughout the course of their interactions of course) &then lmao the fighting parallel with fighting demons not going insane in#the lazarus pit to the puddle of blood at brandon's feet mirrored in a puddle of soaps/beautiful scented oils in connor's post-pit bath#& flower petals. have i this entire time been imagining connor in a slinky selena kyle-esque backless dress yes BUT we can for the sake of#being normal put him in a crisp beautiful expensive black suit with beaded accents. both of them spritzing cologne brandon & his bracelets#connor and his league of assassins ring ohhhh it would be so good to parallel brandon putting his cufflinks and accessories on with connor#getting dressed & fitted with spy gear. brandon stripping his weapons in the beginning -> connor thigh sheath knifes in garters in the end#&they both meet in one big panel/the title page cover at the top of the stairs & there's some kind of dialogue about being fashionably late#& at all times yes i am inspired by that one photo of brandon in his ridiculous coat with no shirt staring at connor who doesn't know he's#looking. that with this. and in the next set of panels connor wipes off a bit of dirt or blood brandon missed in his quick shower & brandon#in his playboy billionaire persona flirts incessantly with connor but truly is obsessed & wants to know more about what he's the heir to.#WHEN THE ASSASSINATION ATTEMPT HAPPENS BRANDON GOES TO PROTECT CONNOR BUT CONNOR'S ALREADY GONE/ALREADY SECURED HIM SOMEWHERE SO HE DIDN'T#GET HURT both of them simultaneously trying to protect the other in their “civilian” act. &brandon as green arrow thwarts the assassination#liv in the replies
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manicpixiedckgirl · 5 months ago
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one thing you have to get ready for as a trans woman who's about to come out is certain cis people are going want nothing to do with you afterwards. we all know this, we all talk about this. transphobes going transphobe
but what i dont think we talk about enough is you need to be prepared for a second wave of this. it will come later. it's not tied to anything body change or surgery or whatever.
trans women are treated so poorly by society that we inevitably shrink. we learn how to exist in the spaces that will have us, even if that means cramming ourselves into boxes that don't really fit, being treated in ways we often don't like, doing things we often don't like doing, often even fucking people we don't want to fuck.
at some point, you're going to learn to stand up for yourself. i don't say this to scare you into thinking you'll become a 'mean trans girl' or whatever. but just like transitioning in the first place, it's change or die. you found the first safe harbor and fashioned your anchor to it but you can't go on living with people who don't respect you, working a job you're too smart for, living a life you don't really love.
and when you do, there will be cis people in your life who only liked that meek, quiet girl who would do as she's told. some of these people were malicious, doing it on purpose because they've known enough trans women to know who's vulnerable. some are doing it unintentionally, believing themselves to be a good ally, you've just gotten angry and bitter (this one hurts the most). and some just plain won't like the person you really are, having only known the people pleaser they got to know.
but it's change or die. if you're not you, you're not living. there are so many better people just waiting to love you, but you won't find them chasing after cis approval. and girl, i promise you, you deserve so much more than what you're getting right now. be strong. you've been strong before. i love you.
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writers-potion · 9 months ago
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Writing Female Fighters
The Heroine Must. Fight.
Today's female protagonists cannot sit on the side crying and breaking down or whimpering as the battle ensues.
Readers want to see autonomous female fighters who can at least defense themselves with courage and adequate skill.
Not all women are the same, but the heroine should get her butt moving.
Less Muscle, but More Flexibilty
The average woman is shorter than the average man, which makes it more difficult to wield a long sword or slam something down on the opponent's head.
A woman who works out can plausibly be stronger than a male couch potato, but if her male counterpart works out as much as her, the man is going to be much stronger.
On the other hand, the center of gravity in a woman's body is lower than a man's which makes it harder to knock her off her feet.
She is also more flexible, which gives her advantage in grappling fights, making use of complex landscapes, or deflecting blows.
A woman's small size can also be an advantage if her opponent has only ever trained with male opponents. His big hands might not get a good grip on her slender limbs.
In historical fiction, giving your heroine good muscule build can be tricky as exercise was generally considered harmful for women, with some exceptions for horseriding any maybe archery at best.
In such cases, make your heroine an accomplished dancer or an eager horsewoman, or the only girl whose father considered to be son replacement and thus, gave her a boy's education.
Women of lower classes who couldn't afford to be fashionably weak will be plausibly stronger, perhaps even more than an idle gentleman.
More Room for Negotiation, but Prolonged Ruthlessness
In the Suspense part of your fight scene, females are more likely to negotiate and talk more, strategically trying to descalate the situation rather than attacking on a momentary impulse.
Generally, women are less aggressive than men and remain level-headed longer than her male counterparts, opting for non-violent methods first before using force.
Exceptions apply if she is trying to protect her children (or someone who she cares for as a child). Mothers can be tigresses.
A female pre-fight conversation may be: "If you had not done so-and-so and betrayed me with so-and-so, we could have been good friends as I thought we would be." "What do you mean? It was in fact you who brought bad blood between us. I can still hear you laughing with so-and-so, taunting me, purposefully making me look bad -" "But that was so long ago! If you want me to say sorry about something so insignificant, you should have just said so: I'm sorry. There. Satisfied?" "Ha! I can't believe you say that so easily. You still don't get it, do you?" "Who's being petty and unreasonable now?"
A male pre-fight conversation will be shorter: "Who's the coward now?" "You're wrong." "Prove it." "Bastard."
Compared to men, it will take more time for a woman's fight hormones (adrenaline, neurotransmitters and such) to kick in.
She would be slower to engage initially, throwing reluctant punches and thinking, but she'll grow more and more violent and lose all rational thought and compassion, and once she's in full flow, may not stop even when her opponent begs for mercy.
When writing a male-female duo, you can show him going for the first blow while she observes and strategizes first. When he's past his peak and panting, she is flying about left and right. Later when the tension wears off and she becomes wobbly and teary, she can rely on him to have recovered faster and distract other teammates so that they won't see her cry.
Plausible Skills and Backstory
In many cultures and time periods, the general attitude of society towards girls is that they have no place in fist fights or martial arts, unlike how it is encouraged for boys of the same age. So if your heroine has physical prowess that surpasses typical 'fitness' or is hidden, build a backstory of how she's obtained it.
For modern heroines, it can be as simple as signing her up for martial arts classes or yearly membership at the local gym. For historical fiction or girls with strict 'feminine' upbringing, it can be trickier.
It can be related to profession: maybe she was an erotic wrestler, catfighter, or an assasin who thought killing was more honorable than prostitution. They may have dabbles with it for a short time and is now trying to hide their past from their respectable employer or fiance.
It can be family backstory: Perhaps her mother was an accomplished martial artist or she had to fend for younger siblings on the streets from an early age. Maybe she was the only girl in a family of many boys who refused to be the punching bag.
Inexperienced Female Fighters
A woman with no fighting experience or training is likely to resort to one of these on instinct:
Try to talk herself out of the situation, attempting to persuade or negotiate for her life.
Grab something to use as a weapon. This instinct seems to be stronger for women than it is in men.
Use her hands to try and break free, or kick (often wth little success)
Pull hair
Scratch.
In a serious fight, pulling hair and scratching won't be helpful, except when the police come to find her body, they would find the opponent's DNA under her fingernails.
Plausible Weapons and Clothing
All of the above applies to scenes where both parties have no weapons, or has the bare minimum (like one dagger each).
Weapons are equalizers, and if your heroine is pointing a gun at her opponent she will definitely NOT hesitate to be the one to shoot first.
When giving your female character a weapon, choose one she can plausibly use. It would take an unusually brawny woman to wield a great medieval longsword.
For historical fiction, give your heroine something she'll plausibly own. Swords and firearm were a no-go for women, but archery was borderline acceptable.
For clothing starters, you definitely CAN NOT dress her in a tight miniskirt and chainmail bra with long, flowy hair and multiple silver chockers. Unless she's trying to seduce her way into her opponent's bedroom, and he has a chainmail bra fetish.
A practical heroine will have her thighs covered, preferably with leather but at least with fabric, since a lot of blood flows through the thighs and a slash would be critical.
She'll keep her hair tied, tucked under a helmet, braided back, etc. so that it won't impede her vision.
She'll support her breasts with a strong sport bra. In a historical eprioid, she'll either tie her breasts tight with a fabric bandage or support them with some kind of leather corset.
Invent a female version of male fighter clothing of the time you are writing about if it doesn't exist.
If you like my blog, buy me a coffee☕ and find me on instagram! 📸
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undreaming-fanfiction · 5 months ago
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Steve and Eddie work together in an aquarium, and Eddie is losing his mind. He's in love, he's got the most embarrassing crush, but Steve doesn't even notice him.
They barely interact, and Eddie only knows Steve's first name. He doubts Steve knows he exists, he's just one of many tour guides (but he's amazing with kids and especially teenagers, so he's actually a great tour guide, thank you very much!)
Back to Steve. Steve, with his lean muscles, easy smile, thick hair and beautiful, but somehow sad eyes. That Steve.
The Steve who works in the aquarium as a merman.
Eddie could watch him for hours, floating in the tank with grace Eddie didn't know existed, with his sparkly yellow mermaid tail, flowing hair and chest hair, and that man can hold his breath for so long? Think of the options, the possibilities!
The mermaid show is insanely popular among all the kids and teens, even adults. His best friend Chrissy was the one who recommended Eddie to the aquarium, she's the main mermaid, and god, if Eddie wasn't gay, she'd have him at her feet. She always looks so effortless, twirling underwater in her emerald green mermaid tail, spinning around Steve. They make such a beautiful pair, it makes Eddie want to weep.
Fortunately, she's already in a happy relationship, so Steve is reportedly still single. Chrissy makes Eddie massage her feet in the evenings - he offered, they're cramping from a bad fit of the tail - and graciously answers all Eddie's reasonable questions, such as "how do his hands feel?" ("Wet. We're swimming, remember?").
She keeps telling Eddie to ask Steve out, but Eddie isn't stupid. That man is the god Poseidon himself, and Eddie is but a humble crab in his kingdom. So he admires him from afar, longing, pining and making Chrissy's head hurt.
But Steve's just so good with kids, Eddie can't keep his mouth shut. He always mutters something to Steve as he's ushering the kids away. "Great show, sweetheart," or "I love that smile, Stevie," or "need help getting that tail off?" He's only a man, and no one can hear him.
Except for a nosy tour coordinator listening in through his earpiece, Robin Buckley. She also happens to be Steve's best friend, Chrissy's girlfriend, and a menace to society.
And maybe one day she tells Steve to just smooch the tour guide, maybe she spills a few of the longing whispers and wishful stares, but she's only human too. A human who's had to listen to Steve's ramblings about the cute guy who always pulls the kids' attention like a magnet, who even through the blurry glass tank seems to be having an amazing time. Steve sometimes asks Robin for an extra earpiece and listens to the rest of Eddie's tour after the show. He loves his enthusiasm. Once Eddie even drew a heart on Steve's tank, can you imagine that, Rob?!
Maybe Robin and Chrissy have to work together to give the two idiots what they need, because Eddie considers himself too nerdy and plain for Steve, ans Steve thinks he's too dumb and shallow for Eddie.
Maybe Chrissy fakes slipping into the mermaid tank and drags Eddie with her. Maybe Robin is there and quickly gets Steve to jump after him. Maybe she makes the innocent mistake of insuating that Eddie can't swim.
And maybe, when Steve and Eddie are back on firm ground, confused and wet, Chrissy splashes them with water and asks if pretending that it's mouth to mouth resuscitation would help, or if they can finally kiss and stop pining for each other.
And one more maybe...maybe in a few weeks, when Eddie ushers the children away after the show, he kisses his palm and presses it against the tank, and watches Steve do the same, before he can give him a proper kiss after their shift.
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hazelfoureyes · 1 month ago
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I'm not taking requests from anon but …. I will….always accept inspiration in my inbox. Just don’t expect a direct response.
I’m alive. Boooooy has shit been difficult and every day I kinda panic but I think survival mode is finally shutting off. I could list all the shit but why? It's not like we arent all wading through varying piles of shit on a weekly basis lately.
Curiosity
Alastor doesn’t believe sex can feel all that great for the ones being fucked. You offer to educate him on the matter with a little hands on learning. Everyone wins.
「Warnings/Promises: Alastor x PussyHaving!Reader (has pussy and is called girl but I mean…I don’t know their business), casual virginity loss, non-sexually repulsed alastor, insulting but highly accurate bowling ball analogy, cervix smooches, creampie because dessert is a necessity, friends with questionable benefits, missionary position, science???, almost fingering, thumb (Singular), empty death threats, saliva as lube」
Minors I will yeet you back into the year of the dragon if you ignore the MDNI 🐉
Alastor’s hooves kicked playfully, slowly, in the air behind him as he rested on his belly. Two clawed fingers kept your lower lips pulled apart as he stared inquisitively at your self consciously twitching entrance.
“People’s things fit in here? I could see fingers, sure. A thumb, maybe…”, he mused, watching you clench around nothing. He learned from Angel more than he liked to admit and things seemed to fit the best for human and hellish anatomy alike. 
A large digit prodded, his head lifting and eyes meeting yours from between your spread thighs. His look was waiting for your approval or dissent. You nodded, sighing out another educational tidbit, “It feels best if things are slick.”
Alastor paused before wrapping his tongue around his thumb and coating it with viscous black saliva. Thumbpad facing down, his curved claw slipped into you easily. The natural roundness of the edges kept you from any cuts, but you had a feeling it’d be easy enough to do harm if he wasnt mindful of how he moved it. 
You could feel his other fingers pressing flat against the bottom of your ass. Instinctively you tightened around the digit.
“It's snug.” He sighed, vindicated. It was far too small a hole to fit anything more without tearing. Therefore: painful. 
“Well, it stretches quite a bit. It can adapt to alot. You - ergh - people can use soda cans and twelve inch dildos even for pleasure.” You rested on your bed, naked from the waist down. Your conversations together were always very open and without shame, neither of you worried to offend the other with questions about sex and gender. So when Alastor mused he couldn’t understand what the pussy-possessors among society got out of sex (he could understand the pleasure of a good squeeze on a cock, even if he hadn’t ever experienced anything beyond a hot mouth and a tight fist) the conversation just naturally progressed to your own personal sex education class. He’d only ever seen such anatomy in medical texts.
He cackled, “You are naive if you think that is true.” 
“Alastor, who's the expert here? I - can you remove your thumb? I feel like a bowling ball.”
Too quickly he took back his finger, your shoulders lifting slightly from the bed from the sudden loss. He paused a moment before adding, “You and a bowling ball have the same number of finger-able holes.”
Your glare went unnoticed, Alastor shifting onto his elbows again.
“Do you think people would willingly have sex if it was always uncomfortable?” You were lifted up on your elbows now too. Locked eye to eye with a very smug deer demon. 
He hummed, humans were animals and all animals followed instinct. “Maaaaybeee.” He teased, eyes breaking contact to look again at the now closed lips. “Regardless,” a wicked grin, “I can’t imagine it fitting without damage and pain.”
A stalemate. 
“You have seen people have sex, right?” You asked.
An uncomfortable pause.
“Why on earth would I watch people have sex?”
Surprise, then confusion, but finally you settled on intrigue.
“Okay, do it. I’ll show you it feels good for me and you can wipe that smile off your face.”
He tutted, “Never.” Alastor saw your flash of insult, “to the smile. Delivering pain is a hobby of mine, no matter the vehicle!”
When he sat up on his knees you shot up and you blurted out, “Wait. Do you have like, hell syphilis or something? Are you clean?”
His hair bristled, “Do YOU have syphilis?!”
“No.” You said it plainly.
Head shaking imperceptibly, a subtle ‘no’ mixed with a silent ‘then why would I?!’ telegraphed via his glaring red eyes, “Me neither.”
A bad start. Speaking of…
“Do you know how to start?”
“Is it much different than my thumb?”
I hope so. 
“Not really.”
He sighed away the remnants of agitation — was he clean?? Really? — and unbuttoned his pants. When his hands paused on the elastic of his underwear your head tilted curiously.
A step you’d both forgotten, cocks inherently had no bones like helpful fingers. Why was the prospect of handling himself mortifying but entering you wasn’t? Very rarely did he find you someone to have any concerns about and never had he felt an ounce of judgment when he admitted his blind spots and areas of naïveté. 
But this was… a step beyond. Almost humiliating in a sense, the source of the feeling was buried deep and obscured by time and disinterest.
“I’ll help.” Sitting up further, your hands went forward before you yanked them back into your bubble, “If that’s alright.”
Perfect, if he wasn’t able to get it up it’d be your fault and not his, he thought.
Nodding, he let his hands come to rest at his sides as he sat back on his legs.
The newness was evident in how he didn’t consider the mechanics of the position. You struggled a little to get this black underwear down his hips enough to release his very unaware cock.
Lifting his hips again and allowing you to pull the briefs down as far as needed (which seemed too far, honestly), you finally had eyes on something you’d been passably curious about.
It wasn’t that he was unattractive but there was a guilt to lusting over Alastor. He’d made it painfully obvious he didn’t find anyone at the hotel sexually interesting. It just isn’t his bag, as Husk had explained. Perhaps liquor had your eyes lingering a little too long on the resident villain.
Nervous and sweaty palms seemed beneficial as you held his soft member. They always felt so silly like this. How useless. Floppy. Your amused smile wasn’t comforting him an ounce.
It twitched, Alastor’s hands fighting to not come to his face and let him disappear away.
“Cute.” You whispered as you wrapped a hand around the Newtonian fluid-esque cock. You didn’t see his horrified face, focused instead on the feel of his foreskin sliding beneath your fingers. Alastor’s attention, too, shifted. He needed to breathe normally and that required all hands on deck (no puns intended). He’d never let anyone in death touch —-
A soft glow of blue flickered somewhere deep in his mind, a sloppy memory of a drunken slip up
It’d been what felt like a lifetime since he’d let anyone put their hands on his body. 
And due to that time his body reacted quickly and soon you had a handful. You both took a relieved breath then, the hurdle mounted. A little shock of pleasure to your core as you stroked his now firm cock made you shiver. It was hot in your hands, how much of that heat would you feel in your guts soon? Would he put it in and just—- pop it out like he had his thumb?
You’d shoo him away shortly after and finish things yourself in that case.
Alastor’s hands lost the battle and came to cover his lower face. That hidden grin showed teeth and he clenched his jaw to keep from letting a mewl slip. His cock was leaking so much it was embarrassing him. 
“Now you’re just playing.” He hissed.
He wasn’t wrong.
Wordlessly you came to lie on your side, a roll to your stomach interrupted as you considered things. With a glance back at the virgin you decided basic was best and returned to your back. Nothing too exciting. 
“Whenever you’re ready, then.” The smugness oozed through your tone. You knew he didn’t know enough to figure out what ready was. 
Alastor parted your legs further with his own widening thighs as he lowered his center to line up with you. He recalled you telling him the hole was very close to the bottom and it hadn’t dawned on him how low that was until the muscles of his thighs burned with the split. How was he going to move like this, he wondered.
Another recollection — wetter is better.
And though he could see a glistening wetness readying to drop down between your cheeks, he wasn’t experienced enough to know just how much your body could self lubricate. So for good measure and out of a sweet ignorance he spit into his palm and rubbed it down his cock from head to root.
The sound made you clench again. Why was that so hot? You’d never kissed, nor held hands. But now his sweat and cum would be fucked into you. 
Another clench as that lightning lit up your core, back bowing slightly with the sensation.
Could overlords sense blood pressure or hear heartbeats? You werent sure, but suddenly you worried about it. You had to close your eyes and focus only on your breathing, unaware it was your turn to hide your true reactions. If you started panting now he’d laugh so hard he’d go soft.
But the truth was, you could begin beatboxing and he wouldnt notice it. He was scooting closer, lowering and then raising his hips again to find a position that he could hold.
Thank Lucifer he never wasted time with this before. 
Finally he lined up and let his held breath go. His cockhead was slick and slipped up between your lips and headbutted your clit when he tried to press in. 
Your shocked scream was stifled into a gritted cry, bringing the back of your hand up to silence yourself. It hurt a little at first but that faded quickly. You whispered a single, “fuck.”
If he wasn’t already cock out Alastor would have just left. But, that would mean saying he was wrong and failed. Which wasn’t going to happen so he slid his cock back down the way he went and pressed into you with false confidence he knew it would go in. 
He gasped when he breached your lips. You were so hot. And that snugness was back, head and just an inch of shaft sheathed but his brain felt like most of his body was being tightly embraced. 
You felt him twitching, and tried to fight back the instinct to tighten around him to feel that little bit of movement even better. It didn’t work.
He hissed a “don’t” when you clenched around him, but you barely heard it over your own little moan. Alastor leaned forward and let his hands rest on either side of your ribs. Head hidden behind long and hanging bangs you couldnt see how his face twisted in concentration. He could cum like this, just one little movement and he was sure he’d finish. Not a normal problem for him, but it's easy to have a 100% win rate for a game you played just a few times before.
Alastor’s body was stick straight above you. 
His body wasn’t touching you except for the cock in you. It was odd, like he was hovering. Would he fuck you without touching you? That seemed so like him.
“Well, color me surprised.” He finally spoke, words breathy. He didn’t smell an ounce of blood so he knew you hadn’t torn. Your body was relaxed beneath him, your upper chest flush. When he looked up you were peering down over your cheeks with parted lips. He’d seen such expressions before in paintings deemed too salacious for museums in his time. 
“It feels even better when you’re moving.” You offered. He didn’t have to continue now that you’d proven your point but you really wanted him to. You’d not been fucked in ages and this was a situation that wouldn’t happen again. “But if this is enough proof…” you trailed off. 
He could imagine it. The feeling of that tender and somehow gripping flesh hugging him tightly as he moved forward more…. And pulled out. His glands would catch, wouldn’t it hurt you then? Wouldn’t he be scraping your delicate insides?
Alastor began pressing further in. Your hands gripped the sheets slightly, your walls were pushed open by his now steel hard member and you could feel a pool of heat low in your womb. You needed him to hit it, to thrust forward and rut against your cervix. But you had to take it slow, this was about him answering his questions first and foremost. 
“It won’t go any further…” he leaned back and inspected the situation. Two inches or so remained out in the cold. 
You shifted your hips and could feel the resistance. “If you start,” you needed a second to gather yourself before saying the rest, “thrusting properly now you’ll be able to get the rest in soon.”
His brow cocked. 
He’d have to trust you on that one and simply keep going. There were still more ways to move within you, to see if the piercing friction really could make you feel good. A moan broke through his defenses when he pulled out until the glands of his cock felt caught on your entrance. 
Alastor’s body crumpled, the pleasure made his muscles go weak. It was as if he couldn’t control them at all. Dangerous. 
His hips bucked from the sensitivity, thrusting forward. Alastor’s head fell back with a sharp gasp. Before he could worry over how he looked his hips were starting a shaky and mistimed pace. Head falling forward again so he could look down at where you were joined, he groaned. His cock was disappearing, girth holding your cunt open as it clamped down against him.  
Alastor felt dizzy from the physical rapture and a helpful redirection of blood. His body was light; bright and weightless.
What a treacherous sensation. He could almost understand rakes* now. 
Your first real moan reminded him why he was doing what he was. Face shooting up from the shadow of his hair he watched yours. Your brow was furrowed slightly, but apart from how hard you were biting your bottom lip he didnt see anything pained in your expression. Your sounds definitely did not say you were being harmed in any way. 
As his cock pulled against your entrance again and rammed back in, he gained new ground just like you’d assured. Another hungry thrust and he was flush with your body. You choked out a noise and gripped the sheets hard. 
“Painful?,” he opted for a single word to avoid his voice cracking with uncontrolled radio static. Alastor slowed his pace out of caution, he enjoyed pain but not like this. He’d only been trying to shock you earlier with his comments when he said otherwise. 
Your hips rolled, pressing him deeper and rolling your eyes back. It earned you a flipping of radio stations softly in the air around you. A babbled, “No, no,” before you could find the sense to look at him, “You’re doing so well. It feels so good. Don’t stop.” Another roll of your body to feel his leaking slit digging into your cervix. That white hot pleasure was fading now to something less mind numbing but still worth chasing. He had you split open down the center and you needed to feel him moving deep within.  
‘Well, Fuck,’ Alastor thought. The mechanics didn’t make much sense but he was seeing undeniable proof. He shifted his hips until his lower stomach was pressing down onto you and let his own normally unwanted instincts take over. You asked him to not stop, after all. 
Fluidly now he could fuck you, lower back activated and driving himself home deeper. Soon he was grunting softly each time he bottomed out. Animalistic auto-pilot kept his pace even and punishing. 
A slurred ‘feels s’good’ tumbled from your still parted lips. 
He watched your neck muscles strain and face redden, you were holding your breath and he couldnt understand why. 
Eyes slipping closed he focused on your warmth, and he could hear the sound of his skin sticking and popping free from your core. A faint wetness to his thighs came into focus from the fuzzy edges of his mind. He felt like he was melting from the center outward. 
Alastor failed to say anything when his climax mounted because it blindsided him. He leaned back for leverage and held your thighs for grip. A few harsh slaps of his skin into yours, your body rocking up slightly with the force before you felt his own warm wetness filling you. A sensation that came in waves with each twitch of his cock. When his body stuttered and a few more thrusts chased his semen deeper into you, your feet kicked out in an uncontrollable spasm of pleasure. 
You took in a deep breath and pulled him closer with your legs as soon as you regained control. Alastor’s turn to fist the sheets, you working your thighs and core to ride him from your place on your back. A few more sharp inhales, pressure mounting to a daunting peak before you could make that string snap. It took a frenzied self fucking with Alastor’s now oversensitive cock but you managed to find some relief with a small orgasm.
Alastor didn’t need you to announce it for him to understand. A modest wave of embarrassment hit, not only was he woefully incorrect but the pleasure was apparently so great you’d chase more friction to reach your orgasm on a cock before just taking your own hand. Was it impolite to not have offered to help?
Your body went slack, muscles disengaging as your sweaty thighs and ass slid from his lap and down his legs. He was still bent over you and cock buried half in you, catching his breath.
“I suppose I should eat crow now. Your little flower is far more accommodating than I gave you credit for!” He pulled out in one go and you felt the rush of his seed spilling out after him. “Though you must admit there was a little discomfort.”
With a heavy sigh you nodded, “Sometimes a little bit makes it feel even better…” a swoosh and a twinkle was heard just past your knees but you didn't move to open your eyes.
A clawed finger booped your nose, “If you value your afterlife…”
A sharp stare to the fully dressed and unsticky radio demon knelt between your legs, you rolled your eyes at the empty threat he always gave you after your unfettered talks, “I won't tell a soul.”
“Good girl!”
*a rake is a rakehell (hell raiser), considered loose with morals for chasing women and drink.
⋅˚₊‧ ଳ⋆Masterlist.ೃ࿔*:・
˖  ݁𖥔.Summoning the Horny Little Deer Cult.𖥔 ݁ ˖
@eris-norwega @reath-solia @catticora , @angelicribbons , @xalygatorx
@cxrsedwxrlds , @nonetheartist , @tsunaki , @janchei ,  @moonmark98
, @readergirlstuff , @berry-demon , @chirimeimei , @fairyv-ice , @olive-frog ,
@thonethatflies620 , @tiredkiwiii , @ilikemyteawithmilk  , @whateverlololo , @psipies
@howabouticallyou , @roxxie-wolf ,  @fizzled-phoenix   , @star-kujo-platinum
, @a-case-of-attachment, @multifandomfanatic02 @watereddownmilk   , @bontensbabygirl  @smoky000
@hoebihoeshi , @pansexual-opera-house , @polytheatrix , @lorddiabigmommymilkers , @backinthefkingbuildingagain
@harley2223-blog  , @poinappel , @midnightnoiserose , @spookieroz , @missmidorima ,
@ivebeenthearchersstuff , @downbadforfictionalppl , @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx , @sleepylittledemon , @aether-th3-enby@dontfuckbutimfab @breathlessaura , @aperfectidiot , @certainlygay , @jth12
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emberwhite · 1 year ago
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So as I have been making my rounds posting about my book across all social media, some people take a look at my cover, get confused, and ask me at point blank, "Wait. Does this book support trans people or not?"
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Of course I support trans people (that's the whole point of the book!), but I don't want to use any language that could be interpreted as political by your average Joe that is turned off by any politics. You lose reach that way. I think the book could have a larger impact by using language to make the story more universal to all people. With the right message, it could be seen an an allegory that applies to not only trans people but anyone who feels like they don't fit in with the tribe.
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Yes, I did decide to go with the animal metaphor for the book in spite of some hot social issues going on right now. There were previously two books that used that metaphor to make a crude political point. I don't care too much for that, but if you read them, you're ultimately left with the feeling that they discourage children from play and imagination. I used to teach kindergarten and elementary students, so I felt there was something deeply upsetting about that. It was shortly after that I felt I HAD to make this book, no matter what. I saw the stigma around the analogy as a challenge.
The good news is that after talking with other trans people about it the overwhelming majority seem to like the end result. And since the book's launch, I've had so many furries, therians, and autistic people thank me for making the book. There's something about the experience of what it is like to utterly deny things that are inevitably part of the self yet completely oppose the tribe and the regrets we ultimately face because of it. A lot of people can relate to that. It is the heart of the struggle of all humanity and society. That is culture, not politics.
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So there you have it. "The Boy Who Wanted to Be a Deer" is now available on Amazon, or you can read the whole thing for free on YouTube.
If you would like to support the book, ratings on Amazon and Goodreads are the best way to do so.
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jweekgoji · 3 months ago
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I quite like Cybertronian!Reader, who can transform into a motorcycle. So Reader's size is just taller than a human. They can still stand in the palm of a larger Cybertronian's hand. What do you think?
TFO!Chars/Motorcycle!Reader [hcs]
tw: size difference, mentions of possessive/overprotective behavior. chars mentioned: D-16/Megatron, Orion Pax/Optimus Prime, Elita-1, B-127, Sentinel Prime, Darkwing, Airachnid. word count: ~2000 a/n: the size difference is sooo yummy  thank you for request anon
D-16/Megatron
One of the tallest from the miner gang. When D-16 finally gets his cog, be ready for a constant tease from him. I feel like cogless D-16 is the most respectful one, he understands how hard it is for you to fit in a society where physical differences play a huge role in how others would treat you. So every time you get into trouble, he will pick you up and like «my apologies!» before quickly walking away since he does NOT want to be punched for the second time this day. He is a total sweetheart, but please, don't be like Orion.
Cogged D-16 is more bold. He is happy he can finally transform, and he desperately wants to test the limits of his own powers. You might walk next to Orion and Elita-1 one moment, and then he quickly grabs you from behind, placing on his shoulder with a «here, let me help you» which is kinda sweet if you think about it.
He also has that tiny overprotective side in him, which is borders with possessiveness. If Orion tries to ask D-16 about it, he will get defensive. What is wrong with him, helping his fellow bot? He never means to disrespect you, his intentions are pure, it's just happens that he is taller and stronger than you. How ironic.
I still believe that, as Megatron, he never treats you as someone weak and unable to protect yourself. He admits that you're skilled, you are a capable warrior if necessary, but he'd rather keep you close than let you wander around others. His touch is careful, his whole servo covers most of your frame, and he loves it, but he's not sure about the others. He doesn't trust them with you. If other decepticons try to mumble even the slightest insult towards your size and alt-mode, he will act as if they dare to insult Megatron himself. [reader is hot enough to replace you whenever I choose, Starscream!]
Orion Pax/Optimus Prime
Cogless Orion is a huge troublemaker, and he is reckless, despite his good intentions. He constantly wants to prove himself, to Sentinel, to others and to you. He can see you struggle with everyday life, and he wants it to make it better for you. Orion often brings you some tiny energon cubes he stole during one of his secret visits to the archives, or maybe it's some pretty shiny thing he gets you because he knows you love it. When he sees your optics almost sparkling in amazement when he holds a trading card of Micronus Prime and you immediately go to reach it, he will be like «what's the magic wooord~?» playfully making you try and reach for it. He's not a bully, usually he quickly quits it and gives you it anyway, but he just adores that cute, tiny smile on your face.
The height difference between you and Orion once he gets his cog is even more noticeable. But after everything, there are noticeable changes in his behavior. He sees you from a little different perspective (no pun intended), and he practically looses that playful and teasing side of his now that he has many responsibilities on his shoulders.
If Megatron is a bot who prefers to hold you close to himself, standing on his shoulder, Optimus is the one who would kneel so he can look into your optics. Now that he's a Prime, a real, kind and caring one, it might feel a little different for you because with Sentinel everyone was used to looking up at him. What Prime would stand on his knees for a small bot for you? You're dear to him no matter what size you are, and he wants you to know that you're important to him.
^ a tiny addition, but he's the bot who probably would like having you on top of his alt-mode, a tiny bot on top of a truck. It gives more mobility during a fight, and he can be sure you're safe next to him. a cute sight for autobots, but a dangerous combo on the battlefield for others!
Elita-1
Elita doesn't really care if you're short or tall, she is more occupied with her own thoughts about how to deal with today's mission and get her promotion. If you do your job well and listen to her orders without being a trouble, she also has no trouble with you. She's not rude, just a busy woman who is thinking about her career, you know? But if you somehow are friends with her, she can spare a minute or two to have some rest.
I feel like she shares the overprotective trait with D-16 if you're much smaller compared to many other bots. Mines are already dangerous for everyone, so she has to keep her optics on you 24/7 so you wouldn't get in trouble, for example, if you accidentally got stuck by a rock or lost somewhere. She explains it like «I don't want to lose my chances of promotion because of you» but it is only a partially true.
Cogged Elita is as bossy and commanding as before, but now she's more open about her feelings about you. You two have some similarities between your alt-modes, you're both cybertronian motorcycles after all. << but the size difference between her and you are a little funny tbf. She might give you the same treatment as Orion with her «I am better than you» talk, but she quickly adds all your other unique abilities. You're fast, brave and strong despite your size, despite often being teased by others, you never give up and continue to fight. She's inspired, and she makes sure you know that she adores you for it. But when someone else tries to pick on you, she will punch them straight into their face.
B-127
You two are both short. Congratulations! But somehow...he's not the shortest on the squad? Bee doesn't see anything wrong with you being small, if anything, he will try to make it look like it's the coolest thing he has ever seen. He is just happy to have new friends, especially the ones who can talk back to him! like «what do you mean you can transform into a motorcycle? that's like super, mega, ultra AWESOME! can you drive while standing on your one wheel? can you do some cool trick??» he's your biggest fan.
B-127 is really touchy with you, mainly because he had never talked with other bots for cycles while being stuck on level 50. He likes to hug you, pull closer to himself, and nuzzle his cheek against your helm, sometimes even doing it without realizing it because he has so much energy and affection he has to release, and you're just around him...it's hard not to give you some love.
This guy probably makes you his victim of loooong, long talks. He will keep you close to himself, and you just HAVE to listen to him talking about Steve, how he struggles to pick a new nickname for himself, and how happy he is to have a cog and finally work for the government...! Bee is very enthusiastic, it doesn't hurt at all, but he has this death grip around your frame that you have no chance but to listen to him. He probably doesn't realize that he holds you, maybe he's unconsciously a little scared of being left all alone.
Sentinel Prime
That man is a bastard. And a huge prick. If he chooses to let you have your own cog, that's probably for his own amusement. I mean, with or without a cog, what difference would it make for him? If anything, he might accidentally kick or step on you if he wasn't careful enough, so consider yourself lucky because he was in a good mood to spare your life. Maybe with a cog, you would be more useful for him?
Personally, see him as a bot who would have you on his shoulder/palm while posing for some photo just because he wants to look like a very respectful guy. Look at him, some tiny two-wheeler and THE Sentinel Prime? Ohh he's so kind and caring for all of his citizens! But he just does this for a boost of confidence and support from other bots. Whatever helps him rule over Iacon and get energon faster?
In private, if you have a closer relationship with him, I can definitely see him loving your small frame the most. Other bots I mentioned before pay a little to no attention to it, for Sentinel this is a thing that makes him feel even more powerful.
He's careful around you, his touch is gentle and soothing, but in his mind, it's tempting and hot; one wrong move, and he can easily damage you, but he never does it because he is in control. You're lucky he likes you or just finds you amusing to keep around. He's a control freak.
^ definitely into holding you on his lap if he has a chance. you can mind your own business until he randomly picks you up and places you where he wants it.
Dakrwing
He is a jerk too, but at least he doesn't hide it. It really depends if you just got your cog recently or if you were with it all your life. If you were a cogless miner before, Darkwing has no mercy for you. He needs his work done and fast, after all, it is an order from Sentinel and he doesn't care if it's too hard for you to hold mining equipment that is almost as big as you. Do your job or he will report you, there's no other expectation. << but he might pick on you more than on anyone else just because of your size. Poor you.
If you were born with your cog and one of the elite cybertronians, might be a racer too, I can see him being softer. As a cogged bot you have a lot of free time, and most bots usually spend their time racing or minding their own business but let's say, you are popular enough to be noticed by him, who happens to be your biggest fan. If he spots you walking through the streets of Iacon he will awkwardly approach, holding his poster of you, shyly asking for you to sign it. His height and voice in intimidating but he acts like a total fanboy around you.
Airachnid
The spider lady is scary, intimidating and a little freaky. Most of the time she's really quiet next to you, whenever you are in the same room, listening Sentinel yapping about something unimportant as usual, you will notice her glancing at you. At first you might think it was an accident, the second one as just awkward, the third time she would not look away once you notice her staring. she has that little pleased smirk on her face whenever she sees you.
Airachnid is probably the second one of the tallest bots here. she's taller than Sentinel (but I'm not sure if she's bigger than Megatron with Megatronus cog), her spider-like appearance makes most bots uncomfortable and it will surprise her if you weren't at least a little scared of her. she's not the one to openly tell you that she enjoys the height difference between you and her but her silent interest tells you everything. her optics always focused on you and no matter how small and stealthy you are, you have no chance to make a move past her.
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iamumbra195 · 10 months ago
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School Bus Graveyard incorrect quotes because I'm bored
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o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
Taylor: Look how creepy it is looking down this hallway.
Ashlyn: I'm gonna get vertigo.
Aiden: I'm a Virgo!
Tyler, deadpan: No, you're a virgin.
...
Aiden: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Tyler: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD
Aiden: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING ASHLYN WITH ME
Logan, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.
...
Taylor: Why is Tyler so upset?
Logan: He took one of those “Which Character Are You?” quizzes
Taylor: And...?
Logan: He got Aiden.
...
Ashlyn: What did you do with the phantom's body?
Aiden: What didn’t I do with the body?
Everyone:
Aiden: Okay, that sounded more sexual than I intended. I disposed of the phantom respectfully.
...
Aiden: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it.
Logan: Aiden, no.
Ben, with text to speech: Mistlefoe.
Logan: Please stop encouraging him.
...
Taylor: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?
Tyler: You’re a hazard to society
Aiden: And a coward. DO TWENTY.
...
Emma, trying to be nice to Ashlyn's new friends: Would you like to stay for dinner?
Mike, excited for his daughter: WOULD YOU LIKE TO STAY FOREVER?
...
Logan: What's a word thats a mix between 'sad' and 'mad'?
Ben: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated-
Aiden: Smad.
...
Ashlyn: Why are you on the floor?
Aiden: I'm depressed.
Aiden: Also I was stabbed, can you get Ben, please.
...
Taylor: Aiden and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us
Ashlyn, sighing: What did he do?
Taylor: he chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and...
Aiden: Who wants a steering wheel?
...
Aiden: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death?
Logan: How am I supposed to know?
Tyler: You say that as if we don’t use you as a source of knowledge of the occult.
Logan: ...You wouldn't be trapped.
...
Ashlyn: Tyler, keep an eye on Aiden today. He's going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.
Tyler: Sure, I’d love to see him get punched.
Ashlyn: Try again.
Tyler, sighing: I will stop Aiden from getting punched.
...
Aiden, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him
Tyler: You did WHAT–
Ben: William Snakespeare
...
Ashlyn: Dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life
Taylor: Fluffy and dead with a gust of wind?
Ashlyn: Unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Bastardous. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die.
Aiden: edible
...
Taylor, whispering to Aiden, who’s on the phone with Ashlyn: Ask her something!
Aiden: How are you feeling?
Ashlyn: Fine.
Taylor: Something personal!
Aiden: At what age did you start hearing voices?
...
Aiden: If I die, my funeral is going to be the biggest party ever and you’re all invited
Logan: If?
Tyler: Great, the only party I’d actually go to and he might not even die.
...
Logan: We need a distraction.
Ashlyn: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?
Aiden, whispering: My time has come
...
Tyler: Where are you going?
Taylor: To get ice cream or commit a felony, I’ll decide on the way there
Tyler: I'll come with
...
Mike, buying a whole bag of knives, guns and other weapons like he's going to war on a random Tuesday: I can explain
Jacob (shop owner): Can you?
Mike: If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.
...
Taylor: Heads up, if you try to make a candle with food colouring, it will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food colouring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food colouring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter.
Tyler, sighing: What did you do?
Taylor, wailing: A MISTAKE
...
Mr. Thomas: What are your goals?
Ashlyn: To pet all the dogs.
Mr. Thomas: No, I meant your goals for this trip.
Ashlyn: To pet all the dogs in Savannah.
...
Logan: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming?
Ashlyn: Does anyone in this godforsaken group ever think before they speak?
...
Taylor: Aiden isn’t answering their phone
Ashlyn: I’ll call
Taylor: Ben and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-
Aiden: Hello?
...
Aiden: I was arrested for being too cool.
Tyler: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.
...
Aiden: Jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that much
Taylor: You’ve been to jail?
Aiden: Once. In Monopoly.
...
Mike: You love me, right?
Emma: Normally, I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don’t like it.
...
Aiden: Let’s watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
Ashlyn: Okay
Aiden: And make out during the scary parts.
Ashlyn: The-
Ashlyn: The scary parts?
Ashlyn: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
...
Ashlyn: How petty can you get?
Tyler: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.
Taylor: I KNEW IT-
...
Aiden: I've already sent good vibes your way… they’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them.
Logan: This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.
...
Mike: So what’s for dinner?
Emma, staring at the food she just burnt: Regret.
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
That's all for today!
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