#What to do if Someone Asks Where You’re Going With That Wheelbarrow

[thatsbelievable]

[sabersandsnipers]

Halsin Building a Crib

@inmyloveworld continues to feed our shared Halsin obsession

The thought wakes you from a deep sleep. You sit straight up in bed, a small panic gripping you. Halsin stirs beside you at the sudden motion.

"Halsin," you gasp, grabbing his massive bicep. He sleeps on his stomach, face buried in his pillow.

"Hm?" he mumbles.

"Where is the baby gonna sleep? We don't have a crib or anything!" Your voice is both a whisper and a scream.

His eyes crack open a bit at the concern in your voice. His large hand slides over your swollen belly, rubbing slow circles along your taut skin. "Don't worry about that right now, love. We'll figure it out."

His words do little to satisfy your worries. But you listen to your husband and lay back down. He keeps his hand on your belly. The act is almost protective.

Little to your knowledge, Halsin immediately begins plans in his head to build a crib. His woodworking skills give him the expertise to build a safe space for your baby to sleep.

He gets to work first thing in the morning, after making you your favorite breakfast. He leaves your shared cabin and sets out to the thick forest surrounding your home.

His first task, and perhaps the most important one, is to find the perfect tree. He takes his time in choosing, taking in the height, width, and ensuring he'll have enough material to work with. Once he finds what's he's looking for, he sets to work.

He grabs his axe and begins swinging. He’s quick to work up a sweat, so he peels his shirt off and tosses it into the wheelbarrow next to him. The strain in his muscles is a welcome one. Even as more years wear on his bones, he always finds solace in a hard day’s work.

In the midst of the continuous swinging motion of his axe, his mind wanders. And, of course, it always wanders to you. He thinks back to the moment you shared with him your belief you were pregnant, and the joy that rang through him at your words. He thinks of the first time he felt the baby kick, and how he felt the overwhelming need to protect you two.

Throughout his long life he's always known he wanted to be a father. But the world is cruel, and after all the events he had been through, he never thought he would get the chance to share this kind of life with someone. Until he met you. Singlehandedly being the most exceptional creature he ever laid eyes on, he was eager to start a family with you. And you were happy to give him that gift.

Once the tree has been felled and cut into workable pieces, his hands are quick to work. He shapes the pieces into their desired sizes. He carves patterns into the wood.

The sun is nearly setting by the time he’s finished. His back aches but he can’t stop the smile on his face as he admires his work. He knows you’ll be expecting him about now. He told you he was going out to hunt for the day.

You’re curled up in front of the fireplace when Halsin returns, a warm mug of tea in your hands. You hear his heavy footsteps outside the door and excitement sings within you. Your heart already aches to see him even after spending the morning together.

He swings the door open, shirtless and sweaty and covered in wood shavings. Butterflies race through you at the sight.

“What on earth have you been doing?” You ask him, a little breathless due to the sight before you.

He grins. “I’ve got a surprise for you.”

Your heart flutters at his words. He disappears outside for another second, before carrying in a beautiful crib. Your jaw drops as you stand and make your way over to the gorgeous work set in front of you.

You slide your fingers along the smooth finish, appreciating its sturdy structure. Images of ducks and bears are carved into its siding, and the sight of it nearly brings tears to your eyes.

“I don’t know what to say, Halsin,” you tell him. You meet his gaze, and there’s a slight tinge of red to his cheeks. A shy Halsin is a rare sight, and you’re overwhelmed with the need to hold him.

You step forward and place a long kiss to his cheek. His hands instinctively find their way to your belly. Once you’re able to see pull yourself from the warmth of his skin, you pluck a wood shaving from his dark hair. A small laugh leaves his lips.

“Thank you,” you say, gratitude surging through you.

He grasps one of your hands and brings it to his lips. “You and the baby are my world now. I would do anything for you.”

A sweet feeling stirs within you. After the horrors of your past, you never thought you could find a life of peace. Yet here you are, living a life with Halsin, and growing the promise of a future inside you.

[gotham-ruaidh]

Little Bit Better Than I Used To Be

Catch up: Chapter 1 (Starry Eyes) || Chapter 2 (Save Our Souls) || Chapter 3 (Dancing On Glass)|| Chapter 4 (Merry-Go-Round)|| Backstage (1) || Backstage (2) || Chapter 5 (Danger)|| Backstage (3) || Chapter 6A (Love Walked In) || Chapter 6B (Without You) || Backstage (4) || Chapter 7 (Stick To Your Guns) || Chapter 8 (Time For Change) || Backstage (5) || Chapter 9 (Take Me To The Top) || Backstage (6) || Chapter 10 (Home Sweet Home) || Backstage (7) || Chapter 11a (Nightrain) || Chapter 11b (Nothing Else Matters) || Chapter 12a (Handle With Care) || Chapter 12b (I’m So Tired of Being Lonely) || Chapter 13a (Angel) || Chapter 13b (She’s My Addiction) || Chapter 13c (Patience) Chapter 14a (Where Do We Go Now?) || Chapter 14b (Where Do We Go Now?) || Chapter 14c (Where Do We Go Now?) || Chapter 15a (Dreams) || Chapter 15b: I Sing A Song of Love ||| Also posted at AO3

Chapter 15C: You Can Do This If You Try

Wilmington, North Carolina

Labor Day Weekend, 1988

Oh, take your time, don't live too fast Troubles will come and they will pass You'll find a woman, and you'll find love And don't forget, son, there is someone up above…

 - “Simple Man”, Lynyrd Skynyrd (1973) [click here to listen]

“I really appreciate you helping me with this.”

Jamie shrugged, and took a long drink from the thermos of Gillian’s sweet tea. “It’s the least I can do. You gave me and Claire a place to stay this weekend. Away from everything. That’s a true gift.”

Dougal set his toolbox on a stump. “Thought you could use a bit of peace and quiet, here in the back country.”

Jamie nodded, and pulled his t-shirt over his head. “I think I’d forgotten what trees look like. Or the inside of a building that wasn’t an arena or a hotel.” He draped the t-shirt over the unbroken part of the fence, and bent to pick up one of the boards he’d hauled across the field in Dougal’s battered wheelbarrow. “The last time we were at a house was for our wedding – and it was Joe’s house, and we didn’t even stay there overnight.”

“I’m sure you’re staying in top of the line hotels, in their biggest suites. My guest room must be too normal for you and your bride.”

Jamie smiled, just a bit sadly. “I don’t know what normal is anymore, Dougal.”

Dougal fished in his pocket for a nail. “I won’t even pretend to understand what your life is like right now.” Carefully, methodically he hammered the nail, fastening the board to the fence post. “But I have to tell you, I’m so impressed you’re still sober.”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

Dougal rolled his eyes. “Oh, I can think of some reasons. Like, every single thing you were addicted to, is front and center of your life on the road. We talked about this a lot last year when you were with us at The Ridge. You’re back on the road – meaning, that all that shit is in front of you all the time again.”

Jamie nodded. “I remember. You said it wasn’t me you were worried about – it was everybody around me. That I was surrounded by people who enabled me.”

“Exactly.”

“Well – things are different now. I fired the bloodsucker that was my manager. I found Colum. I had some very honest conversations with him, and now all of those people and all the shit they used to put in front of me are out of my life. Plus, one very important new person is now in it.”

“And what does she make of everything?”

Jamie held up another board, and Dougal hammered it into place.

Giving him space.

“I thought I was ready to be back on the road,” Jamie added, after a while. “I really did. But I had no idea just how fucking hard it would be.”

He set the board against the fence post. Dougal began hammering another nail.

“And?”

“And…this time, I decided to just be open about it with everyone. It’s definitely gotten easier to talk about it – addiction, and sobriety, and recovery. And people do respect what I ask. They keep the substances and the groupies away from me. Obviously it’s still there – I just can’t see it.” He paused, thinking. “On the one hand I think they understand why I can’t be around that anymore, and they understand how terrible addiction is, and how fucking difficult sobriety is. But on the other hand – let’s be real, they know they have to listen to me and do what I ask. I’m the star of the show. I get what I want.”

Dougal took a nail out of his mouth, and hammered the other side of the board. “You didn’t answer my question.”

Jamie leaned against the fence post. “I think about it all the time. Drinking. Cocaine. Being in my dressing room with three girls at once.”

Dougal stood up straight, stretching. Squinting in the harsh midday sun.

“I don’t want to do any of that shit anymore, of course. But that doesn’t mean I don’t think about it.”

“And what exactly does that have to do with your wife?” Dougal asked patiently.

Jamie’s eyes were inscrutable behind his aviators.

“Because I flash back to the shit I used to do, and then I blink and she’s there with me, in the same rooms where I used to get really fucked up. And she holds my hand, and tells me she loves me, and then I tell her everything.” He jammed his hands into the back pockets of his jeans. “I can be straight with her, and she doesn’t care. She wants to know all of this shit about me, especially the shit I’m really not proud of. Because it helps her understand what I’m working on, and why I don’t want to be that guy anymore.” He cleared his throat. “Why I’m not that guy anymore.”

“What does she say when you bring up all the shit you used to do?”

Jamie pursed his lips. “I know it hurts her. The last thing I ever want to do is hurt her. But I’d hurt her more by not telling her the truth.” He ran his fingers through his hair – almost back to shoulder length. “And every time I tell her something, she tells me something. What it was like to go through high school without parents. Or one time when her miserable excuse for an ex-husband hit her and she fixed her own busted lip in the bathroom. How she’d do surgery while high. How she destroyed pretty much all of her friendships when the pills became the most important thing in her life.”

A blue jay settled on the fence, chirping.

“I didn’t want to tell her all the shit about me, and what I’d do when I was using. The man I was. I don’t want that to…to trigger her or anything, and compromise her sobriety. But because we share it, and we talk about it, it makes us accountable to each other to not fuck it up.”

“So as much as you depend on her for sobriety, she depends on you for hers.”

Jamie nodded. “We’re tied together in so many ways, it’s insane. We are addicts. We were at the top of our professions and we were miserable. We’re terrified that one day we’ll wake up and the other person will be gone. And…” he swallowed. “When we’re together, when we love, it’s…I can’t find the words, Dougal. We waited for intimacy until our wedding night. And I’m so fucking glad we did. Because if I knew what kind of magic we can create, there’s no way I would have ever agreed to go on tour and spend even a few hours every day away from her.”

Dougal leaned against the fence post. “You never think that this could all be too much for her? It’s a tremendous amount of pressure. And both of you being in recovery just complicates things.”

Jamie pursed his lips.

“It’s like I told you last night – she’s my high. Knowing she’s there. Touching her. Sleeping beside her. Loving her…all of that keeps me grounded and focused. I wrote a song about it, and it’s the fucking title track of the new album. She’s my addiction.”

“But is that asking too much of her?” Dougal pointed to the tattoo above Jamie’s heart. “You don’t want to develop too much of a dependency. She’s not a drug. I know that love is intense, Jamie – you know my story with Gillian. But neither of you should completely lose yourself.”

Jamie shifted uncomfortably. “If you’re asking if I have other ways to cope with the stress – I have my guitar, and I have my wife. And I have a few people like you, who I trust. Right now I don’t have much time for anything else.”

Dougal crossed his arms. “You need to make the time. If not for you, for her. Especially if you’ll be touring next year. Going all around the world, far from home – your stress levels will be off the charts.”

Jamie sighed. “They already are. I’ve been having panic attacks.”

Dougal sat next to Jamie on the fence. “Has that happened to you before?”

Jamie shook his head. “Not until this tour. And not every day. We’re in early September, and we’ve been on the road since May…maybe fifteen times since then.”

“Is there one particular thing that triggers it?”

“Not that we can tell. Thank God Claire’s a doctor – she’s helped me figure out when it’s starting, and she helps me get to a quiet place away from everyone.” He swiped his eyes beneath his sunglasses. “I usually end up not being able to breathe, and crying, and freaking the fuck out, and my wife is the only thing that physically holds me together. It’s fucking scary, Dougal, and it’s so not fair to her. It’s yet another thing that stresses her out. She has had so much shit in her life these last few years, I can’t fucking stand that she has to see me like that. Deal with yet another level of my bullshit.”

Dougal turned back towards the house. Watched Claire and Gillian on the porch, shaded from the sunshine, enjoying the rocking chairs. Watched William chase around their dog Bram, knowing it would exhaust them both before lunchtime.

“I’ll be straight with you, Jamie, because it’s what you deserve. Claire told Gillian about the panic attacks, and that you were considering bringing a therapist with you on tour next year.”

Jamie crossed his arms. The flames and flowers of his tattoos flexed.

“Gillian and I – let us help you find someone. Someone you can trust implicitly. With the panic attacks, and with your sobriety, and in managing all of the stress. Someone who can help Claire, too. Because the last thing you want, Jamie, is to be in some random city in some random country and it’s two AM after a show and Claire is somewhere else and some asshole backstage has left a baggie of cocaine on your chair and you have a panic attack. And you’re all alone, or with people who you don’t want to see you like that.”

Jamie scuffed his boots in the grass.

“More importantly, you don’t want Claire to start resenting you, for being the person to hold you together.”

Jamie, surprised, whirled to face Dougal. “I don’t think – ”

Dougal raised a hand. “I’m not saying she ever would. I’ve seen you two together. What you have…it can’t be described. But don’t you agree, that you don’t ever want to do anything to fuck that up?”

Jamie pursed his lips. “I promise her every day that I won’t.”

Dougal stepped closer to Jamie. Grabbed his sweaty shoulder. “Then let me help you. Please.”

Jamie slipped off his sunglasses to meet Dougal’s eye. “OK. Thank you.”

Dougal smiled. “Consider it our wedding present. Now come on – just a few more boards.”

[cbk1000]

Hello, it's me, back with more of the vet fic sequel (yes I know it has a proper title now; yes I will continue to always and only refer to it as 'the vet fic').

He did not have a fabulous time, because people, including the one he had very clearly arrived with, began to dance all round him, and when jibes would not bring him into their midst, Merlin tried champagne. Arthur of course was not a lightweight; but he was not as hefty as he could have been. There was a little sizzling in his head after one glass, and a kind of creeping insanity, which thought that it might have been possibly a very little nice, to kiss Merlin all round his dumb face. He was currently in solemn consultation with a little boy over his hamster, who was called George, and had prompted a visit to the table with the vet, not because there was anything wrong with him, but because it was felt that Merlin needed to know about him. Merlin had taken off his jacket, likely because it was hampering his barbarity, which Arthur had barely tamed with the product which already four hours later was losing that hard-going battle. His hair was breaking out in little ringlets along his brow, and the piece at his nape which Arthur might have nuzzled, with more champagne in him, and less people round them, was kicking up off his neck. He had his hands clasped on the table, and was nodding along seriously to a rundown of George’s colour, age, temperament, and the time he had got his ball stuck under a wheelbarrow when the boy suddenly stopped extolling his whiskers, and said to Merlin, “By the way, who’s he?”

‘He’ was Arthur, who had been sitting across from him for five minutes before his presence had registered.

“That’s Arthur.”

“Who’s Arthur?” the boy asked; not, naturally, to Arthur himself, but to the keeper of all knowledge animalis.

“My boyfriend.”

“I thought boys had girlfriends?”

“Some of them have girlfriends, some of them have boyfriends.”

“Oh, ok,” said the boy, and then: “Why did the mother and father hamster never tell their babies a bedtime story?”

“Why?” Merlin asked.

“Because they didn’t have any tales!”

“Well, do you know why hamsters are afraid to get on sailing boats?” Merlin asked, after laughing appropriately lengthily at a small child’s bad joke.

“No.”

“They’re afraid of pi-rats,” Merlin confided in a whisper.

Arthur like any rational man was still suspicious of children, who like anything that small have to get by on their cunning; but seeing that Merlin was with the boy the way he was with animals, he felt (and this was not entirely his fault, since he was on his second glass of champagne) that same striking impulse for love which has always saved the race from ruin. As a sober man he would have been embarrassed at himself; but as a slightly pissed one, he put his chin in his hands and stared at Merlin not unlike the child was doing. They were both looking at him like dogs, full of stupid loyalty, and love; and Merlin, looking back at him, suddenly flashed the dimples unbearably, so that Arthur could see he had showed them in the same helpless feeling with which Arthur was receiving them. He was never very sure in his love, of where he stood in its estimation. For him it was a thing which he could never be sure of having, but which he could be sure of losing. But Merlin’s whole face was lit up with it across the table, with the small boy for witness. He was just unabashedly doing it, where anyone could see he was smitten.

Then someone else came round to ask Merlin why their cat went, “Bleugh” and the boy was taken off for his nap by his mother, and the look was turned away from him, though he kept it safe, and warm in his throat. 

“You’re slightly pissed, aren’t you?” Merlin asked when they were alone once more.

“No,” Arthur said, which for some reason prompted a laugh.

“Yes you are, you big numpty. Want to go for a walk and have a bit of a drunken snog? I’ll catch up to you real quick. What, did you have a whole entire glass by yourself?”

“Two whole entire glasses,” Arthur replied crisply.

[mjart12699]

Work Song

It’s cold today. Winter is making its way through Vesuvia, cloaking everything in sheets of ice and the first round of snow. The black sands of The Lazaret stick to my shoes with a mixture of slush, but it doesn’t bother me.

I no longer go to the coliseum. Ever since I broke out with Inanna I’ve stayed in the forest as much as I can if I can count on it. However, the things needed to survive cost money, and I cannot rely on Asra for everything. So for the moment I work on the Lazaret, the quarantine island where those afflicted with the plague are sent to spend their final days. I dig the graves here, whether they be for multiple bodies or just one.

Setting my shovel down for a moment, I look at how far I have made it with preparing the grave in front of me.

It’s one of the mass ones, shallow enough that the bodies, wrapped in cloth or burnt to ash will be piled on top of each other in a careless fashion. I’ve worked here long enough to know that it’s not that the other people working here don’t care, it’s just that it’s easier on the body and mind this way.

Another breath taken and I am back to digging the sand, ignoring the ache in my shoulders as I push the shovel into the ground again and again. The building where they cremate the bodies roars in the distance, and the sound of other shovels hitting the sand accompanies it in a disgusting tune.

It’s all too familiar.

Someone starts bringing out bodies from one of the quarantine buildings in a wheelbarrow, dumping them next to the pit before going back inside to retrieve more. Once I’ve finished digging out the last layer I start to arrange the bodies in their final resting place, always making sure to be careful and give them one more act of gentleness in the last light.

I’m used to bodies having some post-death reactions, such as sighs or groans, but the one I pick up now manages to flail. It shocks me enough that I nearly drop them.

They are small, probably a child if I had to guess. I pull back the burial cloth from their face, kneeling into the sands and bracing myself for what I might see.

I am met with a classic plague victim, but instead of being dead this one is still alive. The whites of their eyes are red, and the blood vessels on their face and neck are purple and crimson as well. Their face is gaunt, showing no sign of the baby fat that was probably there just the other week. They feel like a bag of bones in my arms, much like the other dead, but despite that their heart still beats softly in their chest.

Even with the near blindness they have, their eyes shine with recognition, and fear as they gasp for air. Their chest rattles audibly with the movement, and I try to set them back into the sands to continue with the others.

“Wait!” At first I don’t hear it, a whisper in the wind that could easily be ignored, but for some reason I do as I am asked. “Please… don’t want to be alone…” Logically, it’s a bad idea. Even with the cloth mask I wear by the doctors recommendations on the island the plague is still incredibly contagious, taking the life of anyone no matter their circumstances. However, I do as I am asked and continue to hold them, forcing myself to relax and not quite meeting their gaze.

“You’re… you’re The Scourge, right?” The child manages to say between coughs and wheezes, the words like knives to me. I nod in response. “What are you doing here? You’re not sick.” I take a few moments to think of an answer.

“I needed a job.” They try to nod, only to go into a violent coughing fit. I sit them up forward, trying to ease their pain just a little. Once that stops they still breathe heavily, as if they had been drowning.

I wouldn’t be surprised if they were, judging from what the doctors say.

I half expect them to stay quiet, to ease into a permanent sleep and for the thrum of their pulse to stop fluttering. Death seems to be watching, closer than it normally feels and yet far away at the same time, not yet ready to collect them.

Of course I’m wrong again.

“You’re being kind to me… why did you fight then?” Kids are always straight to the point, although I can’t fault them for their words. Adults are worse, especially since you know that they know what their words mean.

“To protect someone.” There’s no point in lying, or trying to avoid their questions. They seem to accept that, leaning into my arm as though it was a pillow.

It’s started to snow again, little white flakes falling through the sky and melting on the kids' cheeks. “I really wanted to see the first snow.”

“You did.”

“From my window, at home.” Another coughing fit interrupts them, their cheeks, which were already red, turning an even brighter shade. “I don’t feel it though.” That’s no surprise to me. The clothes that they had been wearing in the quarantine building are thin, and the burial cloth isn’t much better. Their skin looks nearly gray in the cold light, the only color coming from the angry streaks of red on their face and neck.

I watch as people walk across the sands, wrapped in thick coats to protect from the disease and the elements. A luxury the dead and dying aren’t afforded.

It doesn’t matter if they soon won’t feel anything. I take off my cloak, the fur dull but still warm, and adjust it to wrap around their small frame. My hair whips in the cold wind behind me, making me wince as it stings against my back.

The kid nearly melts into the material, closing their eyes and rubbing their cheek against the dark fur. I can no longer see their chest moving, or the thrum of their pulse beneath their throat as they sigh into the material, but they seem content. That’s all that matters.

“What’s your real name?” Once again, there is no point in avoiding the question, but the fear-like feeling that rises in my chest nearly prevents my answer.

“Muriel… My name is Muriel.”

“Hm… that’s a nice name.” I’ve never thought so before, only being told the same thing by one other person. “I’m going to die soon… aren’t I?” A simple nod is all I give them once again, the tight feeling in my chest slowly growing. “Will you stay with me?” It’s a quiet request, but said with all the bravery they can muster. Once again, I nod.

The sun in the gray sky looks nearly white, just like the frost that covers the ground and falls around us. The chill makes my skin prickle with goosebumps, a feeling all too familiar to me yet again, but I don’t even think of taking my cloak back. The crematorium continues to roar behind us, and its warmth is of no comfort in the cold. Their breathing continues to slow, minute after minute, although it feels like hours. The ragged sound in their chest seems louder than the chains I wear on my neck, and the coughs from them and others boom in my ears.

They take their last breath when the sun finally sets, mere minutes after I had picked them up in the first place. I don’t take my cloak back, instead choosing to wrap the burial cloth around their face once again and tuck them into the fur as though they were simply going to bed once again. My entire body aches from the cold as I lay the other bodies in the grave first, arranging them gently as I’ve always done.

The last body is wrapped in furs, the white cloth covering their small face barely peeking through before I pick up the shovel again and fill the grave with sand.

The snow continues to fall as I finish what last tasks I am given for the night, falling harder and harder as the hours pass. By the time everyone is taking the last boat home it’s heavy enough that all have donned their hats and cloaks, their forms like solid shadow in the flurry.

I stay on the back of the boat like always, my eyes downcast to the floor of the craft in the same manner as everyone else.

Walking home feels like a chore, even as the streets empty for the frigid night ahead I feel the gaze of those who knew what I have done follow me through the cobblestone streets. They only stop when the stone begins to turn to dirt and roots.

Inanna meets me halfway home, walking silently next to me and nudging her cold nose against my hand. The hut is cold when I open the door, and I make sure to kick any excess snow off before going further inside. It takes time for the house to warm once I start the fire, and I busy myself with other things in the meantime.

“Where is your cloak?” I feel her words more than hear them, Inanna’s voice ringing through my head as I stir the leftover dinner from yesterday in the pot.

“Someone else needed it.”

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Trial and Error: Part Two

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2k

Warnings: canon angst and violence

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Supernatural. All credit goes to their respective owners. Any and all comments on these are appreciated.

It wasn't a fun driver since you needed to stop to pee for practically every hour, but you eventually made it early the next day. Joanna is still sleeping when you arrive, but she woke up when Dean lifted her from her car seat. She whines at being woken up, but she lays her head on his shoulder and goes right back to sleep.

This property is very beautiful and very large. It's a farm, so it must be around four hundred acres if it's in the average range. Even the house looks like a mansion, and from the front parking area, you can see a stable with beautiful horses and other farm animals. If you weren't here on a job, you would have loved to live in a place like this.

"Alright, keep an eye out. Anybody with a Hellhound on their ass is gonna be showing the usual signs like hallucinating and freaking out."

"What if we find someone?" you ask.

"You get them away, and I kill Fido," Dean grins, showing the demon-killing knife. You three walk up the long driveway to the house, but you see a big tractor off to the side with a person underneath it trying to fix it. "Hey, pal, who runs this joint?"

A young, pretty Hispanic woman with long braided hair slides out from underneath the tractor. It's clear Dean didn't expect someone like her to be working on a tractor, but you appreciate the hard work she is clearly putting in.

"You're looking at her," she says with a bit of an accent.

"You own the ranch?" you ask.

"No, I manage the property. You three here about the job?"

You didn't know what kind of story Sam and Dean were going to come up with to convince the owner that you need to be here, so this is the perfect opportunity to stay on the property and keep a close eye on the occupants.

"How'd you guess?" Dean chuckles, going with the flow.

"We get our share of drifters. Though, not usually pregnant ones. Have you three ever worked a farm before?"

"Definitely," Dean says, but the woman raises one of her eyebrows in suspicion.

"We're quick learners," Sam says.

"Ellie, who do we have here?" a man says as he approaches the group.

So the woman's name is Ellie, but who is this man? He must be one of the owners of the property.

"I'm Dean. This is Sam, Y/N, and Joanna."

"Carl Granville. A pleasure."

"You're not a Cassity?"

"No, my wife is. Her and her family own the place. I'm just one of those, what you call them," he pats his somewhat pudgy belly, "trophy husbands." He expected you all to laugh, but when he doesn't get the response he wants, he moves on. "Are we hiring them?"

"Not sure yet."

"Come on, these folks seem sweet."

"Well, he's right. We're swell," Dean smiles sweetly.

Ellie doesn't see a problem in hiring you three, but she looks at Joanna and she has a look of uncertainty.

"We have a nanny here for when the Cassity's nieces and nephews visit if you would like your daughter to stay with her?"

"I really appreciate the offer, but I'd like it if she were to stay with me," you say before Dean has a chance to say anything.

"Of course. Follow me."

Ellie escorts you to a small building next to the barn where bedrooms are, and you're assuming that you're staying in here for the time being.

"You sleep down in here. Breakfast is at 5:00 am, dinner is at 8:00 pm, and in between, you're mine. Questions?"

"I miss my room," Dean whimpers.

"We're good. Thank you."

"Okay, the job is yours if you want it. I warn you, it's crap work."

What Ellie failed to tell you is that Sam and Dean will actually be working with shit. Since you're pregnant, she gives you the task to brush the horses while Sam and Dean get to shovel horse manure into wheelbarrows to be disposed of. You like this job because there is something about being with horses that are calming.

Joanna sits on the back of the horse, grinning and petting the animal while you brush the hair. The horse seems calm and doesn't mind the small child on its back, and you're content with doing what you're doing.

"Shit. She literally meant shit." Dean dumps his shovel of manure into the wheelbarrow and walks over to the horse that you're grooming. "I hate you."

"Hey, don't hate the animal," you stick your tongue out at him.

"I don't care. Do I look like a hippie?"

You look to the front of the barn and see Ellie talking with a woman who you can only assume is one of the Cassity's on the property. You're not sure who she is, but you can tell that she and Ellie don't get along well.

"Organic food is better for the cattle," Ellie tries, but the woman isn't having it.

"My land, my animals, my money, my way. End of story."

The woman leaves, and Ellie looks over to see all three of you watching her.

"She's a real piece of work, huh?" Dean says.

"Alice Cassity's a piece of something, alright? What are we gonna do? She's the boss."

"So, what are you thinking?" Sam asks once Ellie walks away.

"What, dealwise? Well, Ellie's the help, so that rules her out."

"Why does that rule her out?" you ask.

"She only works here, so if she made a deal, then it wouldn't benefit her. It would benefit the owners. It looks like to me she doesn't like the owners all that much. Carl doesn't seem like he'd sell his soul, so it must be Alice."

"Bold of you to assume that. Can't ever judge a book by its cover. I don't look like a witch, do I?"

"This is different."

"Not really," you shake your head.

"Should we talk to her?" Sam asks, getting back on track.

"Why? So she can lie to us and then call the cops? No. No, we're gonna have to go stalker on this one, Sammy."

"Okay, you two have fun with that. I am going to take Joanna and we're going to both take a nap. Mama's tired."

You and Joanna separate from Sam and Dean as you turn in for the night. They spend all night tailing Alice, but nothing seems to be wrong. Nothing is wrong because Alice wasn't the one who made the deal.

Carl did.

As soon as they came back, they figured out that he died with his insides ripped apart. The Winchesters really shouldn't have assumed who made the deal, but there is one question hanging in the air. If Carl made the deal and is now dead because of it, then is there a need for you to be here?

"God almighty," the sheriff says once he arrives at the scene.

Everyone has gathered around the body to see what is going on, but only you and the brothers know the truth. Joanna is sleeping inside the room, and you have the baby monitor with you so that if she wakes up, then you'll be able to check on her.

"I'm sorry, Ellie. Carl seemed like a good guy," Dean sighs.

"He was the best."

"You say his head was practically ripped off?" Sam asks the sheriff.

"And you are?"

"Just curious."

Sam and Dean don't have their fake FBI badges to get them into stuff this time, so it's a bit weird to see them being denied access to information.

"They're new. They all work here," Ellie backs you up.

"Carl died badly, let's leave it at that. They've been reintroducing wolves around these parts, but I never thought they could do something like this."

"This wasn't a wolf. I got to make some phone calls. The whole family's flying in for this," Ellie sighs and walks off.

"All the Cassitys under one roof. Good luck," the sheriff scoffs and leaves your side.

"I told you not to rule out Carl, and now, here we are."

"Oh, don't start," Dean rolls his eyes. "I think Carl signed the deal, and now he's dog food. The Hellhound's gone, and we were too busy chasing a pile of Jack to stop it. Let's grab our stuff and get out of here."

You three head to the bedrooms to gather your things, but you pass by the barn where you see Alice grooming one of her horses. She seems oddly calm, which is a bit concerning to you. You leave Sam and Dean to pack your things for you while you make a quick detour and head over to Alice.

"Are you okay, Mrs. Cassity?"

"Fine."

"Are you sure?"

"I really am. I know I shouldn't be because I loved Carl... I think. I just can't remember why."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean Carl grew up around here. We went to school together, and he was always mooning over me. I never--I used to make fun of him."

"When did you two get together?"

If you're right about your suspicions, then Carl didn't sell his soul for the oil that made his family rich. It was for Alice because he was in love with her and wanted to be with her.

"Valentine's Day in 2003. I was at this party. Carl was there, and it was like I was seeing him for the first time. Suddenly, he was cute, smart and funny. It was magic. Carl and I were happy for ten years. Now he's dead, and I'm not sad or angry. I'm just... fine."

"Well, I'm sorry for your loss. Excuse me."

You turn and see Amara standing at the entrance to the barn, and you get a splitting headache. This headache is different because it's affecting your vision as black spots appear in the corner of your eyes. This causes you to sway slightly, almost resulting in you falling face first on the ground. You look back to see if Alice noticed you almost falling, but she isn't paying attention to you.

You quickly leave the barn, passing by Amara to do so, and head to the bedrooms where Sam and Dean are working quietly so as not to wake up Joanna.

"Hey, do we have any graveyard dirt? Yarrow?"

"No, Dean. You're not summoning a crossroads demon."

"Plan A bombed, so welcome to plan B. We get some red-eyed bitch in a trap, then we hold a knife on her until she calls us in a pooch—special delivery," he smiles bitterly.

"Okay, when Crowley finds out we're planning to snag a dog, he won't send one Hellhound. He'll send a hundred. That's not a plan, Dean. That's suicide," you scoff.

"You got a better idea?"

"We stay here. I just talked to Alice in the barn. Carl didn't sell his soul for oil. He sold it for her. He loved her, and she barely noticed him, so he made a deal. Now that time's up, it's like she barely even knew the guy."

"You think our demon signed up more than one schmuck while he was in town?"

"It wouldn't be the first time. Look, Dean, this family's rich because someone booked a one-way ticket downstairs. As of tomorrow, they're all gonna be right here."

"It's smart if we stay and watch over them until we're absolutely sure that none of them made a deal. Plus, it would be nice to kill a Hellhound and not die, you know?"

"You two get two days, then we do it my way."

Things would have to be picked back up the next day as it's very late. When you wake up, your headache is back, but it's a lot worse than before. Not in a way where you can't do anything but lay down, but in a way that it's a constant pain that won't seem to go away.

Still, you have to get up and do your job to protect your family. Ellie requests your presence in the front of the property where the rest of the Cassity's are arriving. An SUV pulls up just as you join her side with the brothers. An older man with gray hair exits wearing cowboy boots, nice trousers, a jacket, a bolo shoestring tie, and a cowboy hat. Alice approaches him and gives him a hug.

"Meet Noah Cassity. He's seventy-one, worth a billion, and just married wife number five, a twenty-year-old lingerie model," Ellie explains just as the model exits the truck. "Alice is his oldest, and that's Cindy, the middle girl." Cindy gets out of the SUv wearing a minidress and a short white fur jacket. "She had a single on the country chart a few years ago. Then she started hitting the bottle, and her last album was a bunch of holiday songs for dogs. My favorites were 'Jingle Bark Rock' and 'Don't Pee on this Tree: Happy Arbor Day'."

"So, she's the devil," Dean comments.

"Pretty much."

Another woman gets out of the SUV wearing a sweater and tan pants. Out of everyone, she is dressed more conservative.

"There's the baby--Margot. She ran away just before Alice and Carl tied the knot, and lives in Paris."

"How do you know all this?" you ask.

"I've been working on this farm since I was thirteen, and I've got eyes. Okay, tonight is an all-hands-on-deck situation. I'm gonna need two of you inside, serving dinner and pouring drinks--a lot of drinks."

"Okay. Well, have fun," Dean grins and pats Sam on the back. "I won't wait up."

"Somebody's gonna man the grill."

"What kind of grill?" Dean asks after a moment of silence.

Ellie and Dean leave yours and Sam's side to check out the grill, which you can only assume that you and Sam will be pouring the drinks. Nothing is going to happen until tonight, so when tonight finally arrives, you put Joanna down to sleep and spell the room so that nothing can get inside and harm her.

The baby monitor is hooked to your hip so that if she cries or makes noise, you'll be able to hear it. Sam is already inside getting the drinks ready, so you head over to Dean who is by the grill. He is wearing an apron as he grills steaks, and you can't help but get heart eyes at the sight of him.

"Impressed?"

"I do like a man who can handle his meat," you smirk. "You look just as delicious as the steak you're cooking."

"You already have me. You don't need to keep flirting with me," Dean blushes.

"I always want to flirt with you. You're my husband."

"Where is Joanna?"

"Sleeping inside our room." You see the concern on Dean's face, so you're quick to diffuse the situation. "Don't worry, I spelled the room. No one is getting in, not even a Hellhound. She is safe."

"Good."

You lean in and kiss him before heading into the house where Sam is in the kitchen with Ellie.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[deanosaur666]

The Woodchipper

[Revised on 5/27/2024]

Clyde arrived at his buddies’ place in the early evening. His truck bed was filled to the brim with liquor bottles.

“Hey, Clyde’s brought the booze!” Donnie shouted from the porch.

“Hell yeah.” Clyde pulled a bottle of vodka from a pile in the passenger seat.

Amadeus peeked out through the screen door. “Wow, what a truck!” He approved.

“Sixteen foot bed!” Clyde said. “Bought it off a sheikh.”

Donnie pulled a wheelbarrow through the front door, and they loaded the liquor into it.

Soon, empty bottles of liquor littered the floor. Amadeus hummed along to the old records Donnie was playing, between gulps of rum.

“You know, guys,” Donnie said, tossing a now empty bottle of brandy onto the ever growing pile, “I’ve got something cool to show you.”

Donnie led them into his backyard.

“Wow!” Clyde said. “That’s the biggest woodchipper I’ve ever seen!”

“Well, it's the biggest I could fit in my backyard.” Donnie smirked, “This thing can shred anything. Wanna give it a try?”

They quickly began running everything they could find through the woodchipper, from neighbor’s garden gnomes, to marble busts, to car wheels, to suitcases full of $100 bills, to pure gold bars. A pile of shredded debris quickly grew to massive proportions in Donnie's backyard.

“What a beast!” Clyde said.

“It even roars.” Amadeus said.

Donnie grinned and rubbed his hands as the Shroud of Turin and an ancient Babylonian tablet slid into the machine’s maw on its conveyor belt.

“You know what would be really rad to put in this?” Amadeus said.

“What’s that?” Donnie asked.

“A baby.”

“Dude.” Clyde said. “You’re right. That would be so cool.”

“Let’s go find one.” Donnie said.

Clementine Blake was a child prodigy. At 7 months old, she could not yet walk or speak, but had written three books that permanently changed the fields of science, math, and politics. Her work helped end 3 famines and eradicate 5 diseases. No one knew her biological parents, but many believed she would be the one to lead the human race to a new golden age.

Betty Blake, her adoptive mother, was taking Clementine on a walk, in a stroller. Clementine was busy writing her next book, glancing up every now and then to look at people who passed. That was when Donnie jumped out of the alley and snatched Clementine out of the stroller. Betty screamed and ran after him, but he quickly jumped into the back of Clyde’s truck, which sped off into the evening.

Ozias Ozbek was in his garage, disassembling a sewing machine with a screwdriver. He was wearing overalls with no shirt. His bare chest glistened with sweat. But that part’s not relevant to the plot. He had reduced the sewing machine to about 200 pieces so far. He wasn’t going to do anything big with it once it was disassembled. He would just organize the small pieces and put them in bins, like he did with everything else. This was his hobby, disassembling things into small pieces, simply for the sake of doing so. By day, he worked as a mechanic, making sure things were put together properly. In his time off, he only wanted to take things apart. He didn’t appreciate others criticizing his choice of hobby. After all, he wasn’t running around at night killing people, so no one should have reason to complain.

As he was searching his toolbox for a smaller screwdriver, he heard his phone ring.

“Ozzy, it’s Betty!” The voice on the other end bawled. “Someone took Clementine!”

“I’ll find her immediately.” Ozias put down the phone.

“If I had a baby...” Ozias thought, “where would I take it?” Ozias turned a screwdriver in his hand, deep in thought. “That’s it! I’d bring it to a woodchipper! That would be the fastest way to break it down into its constituent parts!” He paused.“Come to think of it, I recently repaired a large woodchipper, owned by Donnie Dixon. Maybe he knows something about this.”

Ozias opened his closet. The mask inside stared at him. The suit that hung beneath it had gathered dust. The mask smiled at him. "It's my time, isn't it?"

"Yes." Ozias said. "This night belongs to you now."

Amadeus held the screaming baby in Donnie’s backyard.

“This is gonna be so cool,” Amadeus said, “turn it on.”

Donnie flipped a switch, and the machine started roaring. The sound from the giant machine was nearly deafening. The three of them stood together, watching the glorious machine.

“It sure roars!” Amadeus shouted.

“All right,” Clyde said, “ready to throw it in?”

“You bet.” Amadeus responded. He pulled his arm back like a pitcher about to throw a fastball.

The machine began to shake. Then, a blade came loose from the woodchipper. It flew from the machine and sliced Donnie in half.

“Wow!” Clyde said.

The whole machine then collapsed into pieces. Ozias stepped out from behind the mess, holding a screwdriver and grinning through his mask.

“It’s the Night Disassembler!” Amadeus yelled. “He disassembled the wood chipper!”

Ozias laughed. “And now, I will disassemble you two.”

Amadeus threw the baby into a bush. "Not so fast!" He pulled out an anti-tank rocket launcher. "Don't take another step!"

"Why not?" Ozias grinned and stepped forward.

The weapon in Amadeus's hands fell into pieces.

Amadeus turned and ran.

"Try this on for size!" Clyde pulled a large artillery cannon out from another bush, holding it above his head by the long barrel. "I'll turn you into paste!" Clyde swung it downwards, towards Ozias.

The machine crashed into the ground. But Ozias was already behind Clyde.

"Weapons bore me." Ozias said. "I imagine you'll be more interesting to take apart."

Clyde's clothes burst into individual threads. "Yikes!" Clyde bolted.

Clyde jumped into Donnie's speedboat, as Amadeus started the engine. In just a few moments, they were speeding across the lake, away from Donnie's home.

“Donnie was bragging about this boat earlier!” Amadeus shouted. “It can do 50 knots!”

“He’ll never catch us now.” Clyde said. “Unless he can swim like a seahorse.”

After a few minutes, the two of them caught their breath and began to relax.

“Hey Clyde, check and see if he’s got anything to drink in here. I’m thirsty.”

Clyde found a cooler in the back. As he was about to open it, something caught his eye. A loose screw was rolling around to his left. His eyes followed it to another, and another.

“Oh no.”

[genshin-impacted]

lost & found // Diluc x Reader (1/3)

Word Count: ~3.3k 

Notes: GN!Reader, Seelie!Reader, Diluc/Reader, what more can I say? You’re a cute seelie following Diluc around

Summary: Vaguely remembering the time when you were once human, you are a mini seelie roaming the outskirts of Mondstadt when you find Diluc and decide to follow him-- though he does his share of following you too, through the best and worst of your adventures together. 

“You’re more of a radar for trouble than treasure, aren’t you,” Diluc says rather than asks you, though his fondness is clear to see. You can only do a bashful swirl in response. 

-

Alternatively: As a seelie, you’re terrible at leading Diluc towards treasure without running into hoards of hilichurls or enemies alike, but he follows you anyways. 

[Part 2]

.

.

You are a seelie. 

You aren’t quite sure what that is, but you know for a fact that the wispy reflection that you see in the lake is you. No hands, no legs, no head, no heart-- though you remember when you had all that before. You can feel yourself breathe, but you also know you would be fine without it. You touch the water and vaguely feel its coolness and register that it is wet, but you aren't sure what is touching the water or how you know what it feels like. 

You are able to fly. You rise, and you fall, and you twirl in midair, and you know you have never been able to do this until now. "This is nice," you find yourself saying, but your voice comes out garbled and high, so you stop. You suppose losing your speech is the price to pay for the power of flight.

You don't know how long you wandered until you find something familiar to you. In a land of slimes, aggressive flowers, and crystalized butterflies, it's hard for you to take everything in at once. But you can recognize a human when you see one. (It would be difficult not to. You were once human, too, if you can remember.)

The human is strikingly distinct as far as humans go. With bright red hair, the man in black leans against the tree by the lakeside and watches the water lap up against the short cliff. You don't make snap judgments, not usually, but when you see the man in black, you can't help that your first thoughts are that he looks lonely.

You float to him steadily from what you hope is outside of his sight, curious enough to approach and observe what you can of him without being seen. 

Except, the moment you fly near him, he looks directly at you. (Apparently, you glow, if the light that you shine on his face is not enough of an indicator of your bioluminescence.)

You freeze in mid-air, or as much as you can as a globby orb of light. You wait with bated breath as he watches you as intently as you watched him, and you take a glimpse at what your light has allowed you to see: bright red eyes to match his hair. (You've never seen so much red on a person. And red-red too, not just the orange-y red you've seen people with.) 

Not knowing what else to do, you decide to do a somersault. (You think if you were still a human, you’d attempt to crack a joke or start a conversation to break the ice, but alas.)

You expect him to start doing something-- anything. But the man continues to look at you, though with less of a guarded expression and more of a curious one instead. 

You almost feel offended by the strange look he gives you, but then you see his lips uplift into a small smile and you forgive him. For good measure, you twirl in the air and, when he simply follows you with his eyes, you circle around his head like a halo.

"You're a different type of seelie, aren't you?" He says, his arms still crossed when you fly down to smush your face against the red gem at his collar and the Vision at his waist. You loop around his legs and try to lift his fur-lined coattails, only for him to lift it up himself and shoot you a raised brow. "Did you want me to follow you?"

Follow you? You wonder, why would he want to follow you? You don't think you have anywhere to be, let alone anywhere to lead him to. 

Now how to convey that to him…

The red-head watches you as you shake yourself side-to-side in what you hope looked like the shake of a head. "Ah… That's a no, then. I see," he says. He chuckles when you chirp in joy, looping up again. 

He pushes himself off the tree and walks on the path, toward the mansion in the distance. You follow closely behind him. A few steps in, he turns to you-- and you almost feel bashful enough to droop in height.

"Are you following me on purpose?" He asks.

You swirl up and eagerly bob your head. You wish you could ask, but the only thing you can do is trill-- which seems to do the trick when you hear the man huff in amusement before beginning to walk again. "Well, hurry up then," he says, and you chirp once before speeding up to catch to him in record-speed flying. 

(If you accidentally crash into his back at your eagerness, you think the shake of his shoulders in his laughter is only good signs of the beginning of a friendship.)

.

.

.

You hope the man you’ve decided to follow doesn't mind that all you can do is trill and twirl in the air. You make for a poor partner in conversation, considering you cannot supply the words to respond, but you think he at least finds you amusing at least if the small smile on his face is anything of note. You think he looks rather charming like that, as opposed to his straight-faced somberness when he was alone. Very mysterious, you think to yourself, must be popular.

When you follow him and see groves of grapevines and a mansion of formidable size, you think perhaps his rugged handsomeness and broodingly mysterious nature aren’t his only charm points. 

(You wonder if you can eat. You press where you think your mouth should be onto a bunch of grapes only to be disappointed by a lack of action. 

"What are you doing?" The man's voice calls out to you, amusement laced into his words. You turn around and speed back to him, feigning innocence.) 

The two of you enter the confines of Dawn Winery-- or so you read from a sign. You watch curiously as your mysterious man waves his hand in greeting when a few maids bow respectfully and follow him into the back where a man waits by a wheelbarrow.

"Master Diluc," the man says, and you are elated to finally put a name to a face you've followed for a while now. The winery employee looks past him at you, and you instinctively hedge closer to Diluc, almost hiding behind his hair. "Is that… a seelie?"

"So it seems," Diluc replies, crossing his arms. He takes a look at you. "Though it has yet to guide me anywhere."

You let out an extended squeak of indignance that makes him laugh, uncrossing his arms before he turns back to the worker at hand to discuss business. 

You'll show him, you think huffily. You can guide him somewhere-- it's in your bones (metaphorically). You found him, didn't you? You reason, surely there is something innately Seelie about you that will lead him somewhere.

Most seelies, as you have learned from watching Diluc follow the larger blue seelies, guide people to a treasure chest or some kind of monetary reward for leading them back to their seelie courts. You wonder if they are programmed to know where they are supposed to go and if there is a natural pull to a certain place. You wonder if it's anything like your wandering curiosity similar to that of a child, hoping to see what lies ahead and barreling forth. 

Either way, you take the lead and Diluc follows you out into Teyvat.

And he follows you right into enemy territory.

The first time feels like an accident, and after Diluc destroys the encampment, he finds a box of artifacts as a reward for his battle prowess. (You've never seen so much burnt grass.) The second time you guide him into enemy territory feels like a coincidence. They were next to each other, and hey, Diluc is able to find an exquisite chest this time filled to the brim with mora.

The third time around, it is hard to argue otherwise.

"You're more of a radar for trouble than treasure, aren't you," Diluc comments, settling down onto a log as you (metaphorically) bury your head into your hands. To convey such emotion as a seelie, you droop to the ground as flat as you could possibly be at his feet.

"I'm kidding," he says, watching with quipped lips as you rise from the ground moodily. "We did get some treasure out of it, so it wasn't a total loss." He reaches out with his hand to gently brush over your front as he would a cat-- and you react as a cat would, preening into his hand. He lets out a huff of laughter. "Affectionate, aren't you?"

You do a bashful swirl.

.

.

.

You realize soon enough that most people would not call Diluc private or stoic. Charming, a man with a way with his words, succinct, and pleasant are only a few things you've heard people say about him. And you were right-- he is a popular man if the eyes that follow him and the dreamy sighs that come after he leaves is of any indication.

The mysteriously cool Diluc you meet on the first day is vastly different from the man that everyone else interacts with on a day to day basis. He's not charming all the time, but he has a way about him that exudes confidence and almost an elitist composure. In some ways, you are glad-- you don't have to hide away behind his collar or in his hair (you still do this, if you're honest, just because his hair is so fluffy), afraid to mar his pristine reputation as a local bad boy. And in other ways, you are a bit smug, to know a side of Diluc that he shows to very few people.

Kaeya is one of those few people you have seen Diluc act anything less than amicable towards. 

"I was hoping one day you would have someone at your side but I have to admit, Master Diluc," Kaeya says, propping his face on his hand in amusement, "this is not quite what I imagined."

You let out a titter of laughter at the difference between the two men's expressions as Kaeya pokes at your little translucent ears. Kaeya looks at you with mesmerizing amusement as Diluc glares at Kaeya over his wiped-clean glass like he would like to do nothing else but break it over the other's head. ("It wouldn't hurt that much," Kaeya tells you flippantly. "Not as much as the hangovers his drinks give me.")

"Don't you have somewhere better to be?"

"Not really, no." Kaeya replies, feigning hurt, "Why, don't want me here?"

"Never."

Kaeya gives you a pointed look akin to a puppy. "His words are colder than my Vision, mini seelie," he says to you. "Careful not to get frostbite now."

"You have the privilege of having earned my ire," Diluc says shortly. "Also," he slaps Kaeya on the back of his hand when he goes to pull at your ears, "stop that."

"Protective, aren't you?" Kaeya chuckles, watching as you gaze up at Diluc adoringly. "I think you're one phrase away from telling me to get my own mini seelie."

At this, you let out a long coo, flying up to bop Kaeya gently on his nose before going over to Diliuc and rubbing your face onto his cheeks. You hear Diluc let out another breath of laughter, and you feel his hand press you closer to him. “Are you comforting me?” He asks in amusement, and for once, he does not berate Kaeya for joining in with his laughter. 

“The pair the two of you make,” Kaeya drawls, picking up his glass of Death After Noon. “You’d fight wars for each other, wouldn’t you?”

Of course you would, you think, though there was very little you could do as a seelie-- and you forget that at times. 

To be fair, most of the time, Diluc didn’t seem to treat you any less than his traveling companion. You’re only reminded when you float on your own when he’s cleaning up the tavern and get chased by cats and birds alike, only to come flying home to Diluc blubbering about your near-death experiences (though was it even possible for you to die?). And when you try to, in attempts to help Diluc out, scold a rowdy customer into behaving by slamming your body into their face rapidly without doing any damage whatsoever.   

The two of you-- Seelie and Uncrowned King of Mondstadt-- were a pair of renown. (“Two peas in a pod,” Venti would say the first time you led Diluc to him at Starsnatch Cliff, and “always together like bread and butter,” he said to you two the second time you find him near Starfell Lake. And “are you two following me?” when Venti walks into the tavern for the third consecutive meeting.) And if you ever doubted that Diluc cared for you, you had to look no further than when you were stolen from Diluc’s side by treasure hoarders who didn’t know any better.

It is in these moments where you are viscerally reminded that you are a seelie-- a being meant to guide people to treasures-- and not what you have been for the past few-- weeks? months? by Diluc’s side. You realize that you’ve never been hurt in this form before when you are kidnapped. It didn’t occur to you that you could feel any pain, and you wonder why not when you can feel the softness of Diluc’s hair and the warmth of his hand-- all gentle, loving gestures. Being squeezed by the treasurer hoarder’s hand feels suffocating, like your lungs being crushed under a massive, unrelenting weight.

It is not pleasant, to say the least, especially when they threaten you to take them to treasure that you know you cannot locate. 

Or can you? 

With convincing pulses of light, as though you’re approaching actual riches, you lead them where you lead people (or rather, just Diluc) best. 

The enemies of your enemies are your friends; you watch as an axed mitachurl spins around, chasing after the treasurer hunters who with varying degrees of fear, run away. They would have gotten away scot-free if they had not run into Diluc who had somehow found you before you could come back to him.

His phoenix burns bright especially in the moonless night, and Diluc takes care of two enemy camps that night. 

“Clever,” he says, making you preen, “leading them here. They really didn’t know what they signed up for when they started following you, did they?”

How did you find me? You trill, twirling around. And there should be no reasonable way for Diluc to understand what you’re trying to say, but he does anyways. 

“I just did what you usually do for me,” Diluc says, putting his hand up so you can gently land on it. Your glow illuminates his face in the softest shade of color. You watch as his lips turn up into a small smile. “I led myself to wherever the trouble was and knew I’d find you.” 

(Diluc will never tell you this for as long as you are a seelie, but the moment you do not come back to him when he finishes up his shift at Angel’s Share, his stomach drops. It shouldn’t have been hard to spot you, a glowing light, amongst the quiet, softly lit streets of Mondstadt, but he gives the city a quick lookover and cannot find you. 

He learns about the treasure hoarders from his connections and does not hesitate to take his broadsword with him and go looking for you. 

He runs into two other treasure hoarder camps and fights three groups of slimes before he finds the hilichurl camp you’ve led the hunters into, beyond relieved to see your familiar light in the distance.)

From that night, Diluc finds a mini seelie (you), sixteen anemo sigils, an old broadsword, mora, and a few treasure hunter insignias left behind. He gives you a sunsettia even though the both of you know you cannot eat, and you sit together at the edge of a cliff, watching the moon come out from its hiding place within the clouds. 

You have never felt safer.

.

.

.

You don’t really sleep, but every night you take your place by Diluc’s pillow and let time pass you by. Time feels different as a seelie, especially when you do not have Diluc to ground you to the schedule of a normal person. 

Though, if you were honest, it isn’t as though Diluc keeps regular hours himself. How many times have you bullied (read: squeaked at) him into turning in before dawn? How many times have you pressed your entire translucent body onto his face so he can take the hint to finally take a break? You vaguely remember being a human, and you think you should be abhorred by the amount of sleep Diluc isn’t taking, considering how good sleep can feel. 

On the bright side, Diluc has gotten more used to your antics that it only takes a little nagging from your end for him to turn the desk lamp off.

“You’re quite persistent,” he comments, following you with his eyes as you press your body into various spots in the ceiling above him. “I can’t tell if I’ve been blessed or cursed with you as some sort of guardian.”

Guardian seelie, you titter, spinning around with your ears outstretched as though you were an angel. Special isekai seelie, you laugh to yourself, and Diluc only watches you fondly as you float down. 

"’Stripped of all that the body once held close and the soul once held dear, song and memories are all that now remain of yesteryear,’” Diluc recites quietly as you look up to him. “‘The last singers-- the first Seelie-- they played their final tune in the halls of angels.’" 

What is that?

“It’s a song I remember hearing when I was a child,” he says, “about seelies and their origins. I don’t remember if there was anything else, but it came to me today when I was thinking of you.” You wait for him to continue as he dims the light, your glow the only thing illuminating the room other than the moon. “Most seelies want to go back to their seelie courts… but it doesn’t seem as though you want to.” He pauses. “Or is it that you don’t have a court to go back to?”

You stay silent. 

“Sorry, forget what I said. It doesn’t matter in the end anyways.” Diluc scoops you up from his lap to place you at your usual place on the other pillow by his head. You softly trill when he gently pets you, and whether you mean to or not, you glow just a bit brighter for a moment.

“Even if one day you decide to leave, the winery will always be open to you,” he says. “Adeleine and the rest of the maids will recognize you and let you in-- though I suppose the entirety of Mondstadt knows who you are by now so I guess I don’t have to worry about that, do I?” He smiles when you coo softly.

“Good night,” Diluc says to you, as he does every night, and sleeps knowing you cannot say it back in words, though he understands you regardless every time.

If you weren’t a seelie, would you have been able to be as close to Diluc as you are now? Would he still have cared about you to the extent he does now?

Even if these questions did not have the answers you wanted to hear, you think to yourself, as your heart warms (though you have no heart) from the sight of seeing Diluc’s even rise and fall of his chest, that you wish that you’d one day be able to say ‘good night’ back to him.

.

You can only watch the moon rise and dream.

[thewalkingdead-imagines]

TWD - Negan Imagine ~ “Find Me”

Imagine about the 18th episode of season 10

Summary: Maggie’s arrival in Alexandria puts a strain on Negan and the Reader’s relationship, that feeds off their worst fears and forces them to work through their pain and panic about their future together 

Dusk was falling over Alexandria, lulling it slowly but surely into its mellow, dusty blue light. The sun had entirely sunken behind the treeline by now, leaving the air stripped off its warmth and brisk as it flowed into the small woodhouse by the walls.  Negan had driven his last nail into the planks of the damaged house merely a half hour ago, frowning and unusually quiet since the moment Maggie and her son had walked into Alexandria. He’d barely said a thing since then and neither had you, too tense and shocked even though both of you had known that this moment would come one day or another.  With a deep sigh, you moved in to start and collect the medical utensils you’d just used on your last patient, hoping that preparing dinner back at your house would allow Negan to distract himself a little.  The loud squeaking of the wooden floor planks made you flinch up slightly and shoot your glance towards the open door in a split second as a figure shielded the last light from falling inside. “Hey”, Daryl grumbled as he glimpsed at you and raised his hands slightly in response to your reaction,”Just me.” “Oh hi”, you said, straightening yourself up from your crouched position over the table,”Sorry, I was just surprised. Thought I was the only one left here.” Daryl nodded slightly, his eyes wandering over the table with the last meds that you had to pack back up again before he looked back up. “There’s still someone at the infirmary?”, he asked, shaking his head slightly as you started to look him over, intuitively searching for any injuries or wounds on him that needed need treatment,“Not for me, for the newbies.” Maggie’s group. For a moment, you were a little startled before you caught yourself again and started to nod as you moved in to lay a bunch of bandages back inside the bag. “Yeah, Steve usually takes that shift so he should still be there for some time”, you said, gulping slightly as you tried to act as casual as you could, though this whole situation made you nothing but tense, “It’s only him though. Is a lot of care needed?” “Nah, they’re mostly fine...Maggie just settled ‘em down in one of the houses”, he mumbled with a slight shake of his head, before it got quiet for a moment and the question you’d felt pressing you from within finally slipped out of your lips. “Who exactly are they by the way?”, you asked, glimpsing at Daryl who visibly seemed to tense up,”I’m just curious.” Shifting from foot to foot Daryl looked away from you, his glance bouncing around the room before he cleared his throat slightly. “Her people. Ran into their community years back and lived there till some psychos destroyed it...Came back here to get a new safe place”, he grumbled as his eyes finally landed back on you and he rubbed his hand tensely over his arm, “One of ‘em followed them back here, killed a couple when we were outside until we could get him...that’s why we’ve been out there for longer, made sure that all of ‘me are gone.” You only nodded as you listened to the story, trying by all means to not show how tense you actually were. What had happened out there must have been horrible, and you had never been against taking people into Alexandria, but there was something about this all that rubbed you the wrong way.  Maggie was only back because her old community got attacked and they needed a new place. She left for years and was only back because of these events and directly rolled into the place as if she owned it, as if bringing a bunch of new people didn’t need to at least be talked about with the council, just to clear things up.  Maybe you were being oversensitive when it came to her, maybe not, but the thought that she might try to hurt Negan’s position within this community after leaving for years and only coming back because her new place failed to persevere brought a whole new wave of suspense and a sense of anger over you. “You’re done for the day?”, Daryl asked after you’d become quiet for a moment, visibly sunken into your thoughts. “Yeah I’m just finishing that up and then I’ll get back home”, you said, nodding towards the bag and brushing the tense feelings and thoughts out of the way for a moment as Daryl tilted his head and brought them right back with merely two words. “Negan’s there?”

“Yeah”, you only nodded, trying to act as if you hadn’t heard the slight stinger in his voice. You weren’t in the mood for this type of discussion, especially not now and not with him. ”Finished his work and already wanted to prepare some dinner.” “Things about him aren’t decided yet, y’know that right?” You’d known that he’d say something like this. You’d known it and still it got you more worked up than you already were. “I know that we can use any helping hand to built Alexandria back up”,you said, trying to keep your cool even though you could hear your own voice shaking slightly with suspense ,”And Negan has two healthy and strong hands that are pretty much needed right now.” Just like they were needed to kill Alpha. You suppressed this last part, for now. You knew your half brother more than well enough to know which kind of comments would make him shut down immediately and though there was an urge in you to repeat once more for him what would have happened to all these places without Negan’s help, you refrained from it. You wouldn’t shy away to throw it at him if things got more serious, but this right now was not the place or time. “We didn’t get to have these type of things for all these last years... we’re just enjoying whatever we can get”, you only added, calmer now and a bit more conciliable though that didn’t let the slight frown on Daryl’s face to vanish. “Well”, he grumbled, glimpsing at you through the brown strands of hair that fell into his face,”Do it for as long as you can.” Clenching your jaw you stared at him, growing more hostile with every passing second. That remark wasn’t needed, he could have just kept it for himself, just like you had done it for the sake of the moment. You could feel the anger starting to built up within you, starting to push you more and more back into your defensive mode as you let out a sharp breath. “He’s earned his spot”, you said, throwing in the last salve that had laid on the table into the bag before you shut it and glanced back up at Daryl,”So I hope that we can do it for a very long time.” A mere huff fell from his lips and he only nodded before he started to walk back towards the door and grumbled his last words to you. “See you around.”

The encounter with Daryl left you with even more tense than you already had been since the moment Maggie had walked back into Alexandria, so much that you hurried to get out of the house and walk back home as soon as Daryl was gone. The cool evening air barely helped cooling yourself down as well as the worries that kept on pressing in on you, trying to creep back into your head and turn everything upside down. A thick sigh left your lips as you moved from the grassy underground that surrounded the houses by the wall onto the blacktop of the street and passed by the last few workers who were out here, doing their job. A few of them carried wood towards the other side of Alexandria where the walkers had left a smaller hole in the wall that still needed to be fixed and a few others carried shovels and a small wheelbarrow that was filled with some unearthed wildflowers towards the graveyard that had been damaged by the walking dead as well. A tight breath left your lips as you walked past it, watching the workers move into the back where most graves still needed to be fixed with new or fixed crosses and flowers, and yet it wasn’t any of those graves that made you halt, but one in the front. It was the freshest grave, the cross already fixed and with new flowers already planted by its side and even from your spot on the street you were able to read the name of your friend that was carved into the light wood. You missed him. You barely had time to grieve and process what Dante had done to him, nor had you been able to realize that he was gone.  During the last days, you’d often found yourself turning around in the infirmary, wanting to ask him something only to realize that you would never have the chance to do so again. Things at the infirmary were working fine, but it wasn’t the same, especially because you hadn’t just lost a colleague but a friend, one of the only people who’d never judged or distrusted you because of your relationship to Negan. Someone who you’d been able to talk about to about random things, whether it was about the infirmary and medicine, stuff that was going on in Alexandria or anything that just seemed interesting at the moment.  Now, whenever you seemed to talk to someone it lead back to your relationship, to you having to defend it as well as Negan’s new found freedom, just like with Daryl just now. You were tired of it, of these discussions that were always the same and of the helplessness to not be able to decide what was happening in your life. All you wanted was to live peacefully with Negan in that house and built something up with him.  You didn’t ask for more, just that.  A tight breath left your lips as you glimpsed at the grave again, trying to keep a lump from growing in your throat as your eyes caught the tiny teddy bear by the cross Rosita must have put there with Coco. “Fuck”, you mumbled to yourself, trying to blink the first tears away that had shot into your eyes before you forced yourself to move further down the street, trying to keep your mind from traveling into darker places, places that would tell you that Siddiq’s grave and the graves of all these other people were only proof of how easy it was to still lose loved ones at any given moment. Of how easy it still was for you to lose Negan. Though you only wanted to come home as fast as you could, you took the extra route around the lake in Alexandria’s midst, trying to let the walking and the colder growing air calm your head down and snap back to normal. Unsurprisingly, it only helped semi-well and you still felt tense when you walked up the porch of your home, only held together by the thought to enjoy any time you could get with Negan in here. “I’m home”, you called out as soon as you shut the door with a small thud behind you and felt the scent of Negan’s dinner fill the air. “Hey Baby”, you heard him call back as you found him standing by the stove, frying some vegetables in the pan along with the portion of boar that you’d gotten after a group went out to hunt yesterday.   “Smells good”, you said, letting your bag down to the floor before you moved in to wrap your arms around Negan from behind and peeked at the simmering meal. “Sure hope it also tastes good”, he said, forcing up a smile that broke through the tension that still visibly laid over his face as he turned just enough to press a small kiss over your lips. “I’m sure it will”, you mumbled back, nuzzling your nose into the fabric of his shirt while you could feel his tense body shifting slightly. A small groan left his lips as he flexed his back and shoulders a little, tensed up not only due to the Maggie’s reappearance but also the work he’d done all day. “You wanna go take a bath together later on?”, you asked, peaking up at him as you loosened your embrace around him to stroke your hand softly over his strained shoulders, hoping that the bath could be yet another distraction for the both of you,”can do wonders.” “Yeah”,you only heard Negan say with a nod, no cocky grin or wolfish remark as usual, and even though it was a ridiculously small detail, its absence only showed you more how fraught he truly was. ”I think the food is done.”

Oddly silent you moved over with him to the already set table and got some of the food onto both of your plates and started to eat, though neither of you seemed truly hungry after today’s events.  You tried to get something down, but the suspense that filled the room was so palpable that it closed up your throat and weighed so heavily down on you that you found yourself more poking into our food than actually eating it. It was the same for Negan, he was barely eating and what concerned you more, he wasn’t talking at all.  The suspense-filled silence seemed to take up everything and kept you locked into your spot, unsure of what do do or say while Negan only seemed to tense up more with every passing minute until his voice cut through the silence. “That kid has no Dad ‘cause of me.” Your glance shot up to him the moment he spoke it out, feeling your heart sinking as you watched him gulping thickly without looking up once, he only stared at the wood of the table as if it was the only thing keeping him from breaking. A trembling breath fell from your lips as you slowly moved in and grasped his hand, squeezing it softly as you tried to find the right words without making the situation harder than it already was. “There’s a lot that lead up to that point, it wasn’t just you”, you mumbled, only to see Negan’s eyes shooting up to you while a thick huff left his lips. “Well I was the one swinging the bat, wasn’t I?” “You thought that we’d killed a whole outpost of people just to steal supplies.” Your eyes were locked onto his as you spoke, and though you tried to keep your voice firm you were insecure and unsure of how to go on as well. You were aware of the shit Negan had done in the past, but he’d paid his price and suffered enough having to work through them in these years down in the cell and you didn’t want him to fall into these deep holes again, nor did you want to lose the view for the bigger picture. A lot of things had went down back then, and not only Negan had made mistakes. ”You did those things in that night because of it and you didn’t even know she was pregnant”, you added, giving his hand another soft squeeze, “Not saying it was right but we all did shitty things back then that lead to a whole lot of deaths and destruction.” “Doesn’t change that I’m ultimately the one who made that kid fatherless.” His voice was rasp but harsh as he shook his head and moved his hand out of your grasp, running it down his face as he let out another deep sigh. “I don’t even fucking know how to feel about that myself”, he scoffed as he stared back down at the table,”But I sure as shit know that me delivering the hits in the end is all that counts to them”, “It shouldn’t...we’ve all taken the life of someone who was a loved one to someone else”, you mumbled after a moment of silence, starting to poke back into your food as if it would help you handle this while your voice became more tense,“Don’t wanna know how many kids ended up without a parent because of the things we did at that outpost or anywhere else.” “Well, thats not how anybody out there’s gonna see it.” “Yeah then it would be time to hold up a mirror for them”, you said, feeling the restlessness and anger Daryl had whirled up back at the woodhouse creep back up, “You know what Rick would’ve done with a group if that outpost had been ours and it had been our people  that had been slaughtered in their sleep?” A heavy but trembling breath rumbled through your chest as you looked over at Negan, growing more agitated as you thickly gulped. “He surely wouldn’t have just killed two. Gracie’s only here and grows up to be Aaron’s daughter because Rick killed her birth father. Her mother was likely killed too when they attacked that other outpost during the war. It’s funny how no one ever talks about that”, the words just flowed out of your lips, fueled by the pent up desperation and even fear that had simmered within you, “So if anyone tries to make you look like a monster or whatever I won’t shy away anymore to repeat these things for them...Everybody has done horrible shit. You, Rick, everybody’s who’s inside these walls including me.” Negan didn’t even look up at you, he just kept staring at the table as you placed your fork next to the plate, almost letting it fall with a clatter against the ceramic as you felt the hunger leaving your body once for all, replaced by an upset feeling that was spreading through you and let you heat up. “I won’t just let Maggie or whoever else try to make them turn on you again after you’ve earned more trust”, you said, audibly stressed,”The trust that you deserve after ripping your ass off for them.” A thick sigh left your lips as you stared at Negan, just hoping he’d look up at you while the ugly mix of helplessness, fear and anger crawled further up your body and made pinch the bridge of your nose for a moment as you felt them taking you over. “I’m just sick of these fucking new things that always pop up when things seem to get better”, it left your lips more broken, trembling and yet angrier than before as Negan’s glance finally shot up to meet yours, though the icy stare within them was the opposite of what you had wished for. “Well then maybe you should reconsider being with me”, he scoffed, hitting you with shock and confusion as you furrowed your brows at him. “What kind of comment is that?” “’Cause this is how it’s always going to be”, he snapped, the pent up tension step for step breaking out if him as you still stared wide eyes at him,”We’ll never find our goddamn peace and all these people are always gonna hate me and the fact that we’re together.” “Not everybody hates you”,you quickly retorted, for now trying to push that shitty remark away from you and onto the fact that he was scared too,”There are people who’ve grown to trust you more and my colleagues at the infirmary are all good with you being out and working, and I’ll do my best to keep it this way.” “Well but those who are in higher positions do”, he let out, a bitter chuckle falling from his lips as he shook his head before his cold stare landed back onto you while his voice grew louder ,”Aaron was ready to execute my ass and he’d still do it just given the chance. Same fucking shit with Nora and Kyle. Those who spoke up against hanging me were Siddiq and Laura and they’re fucking dead now too. Maggie’s ready to slaughter my ass and your brother would be just fine with it as well. Things wont’t stay the same as they were during the last fucking days and it sure as shit won’t get better now.” Staring at him you let out another tight breath, still holding onto your last piece of hope despite your own fears as you gulped thickly and shook your head softly. “We can’t say that for sure. Gabriel’s more on our side. Maggie isn’t a member of the council and Daryl is already being more accepting of you than he was before-“ “Goddamnit (Y/N)”, Negan’s booming voice suddenly cut you off, loud enough to make you flinch and stare wide-eyed at him as he rose up from his chair and glared down at you,”Don’t you get it?!” Your heart started to pump harshly against your chest as his loud voice sounded through the room, and you could feel yourself becoming overwhelmed with the situation while you watched the anger in him skyrocketing. “What we had these last few damn days wasn’t real, we lived in that small fucking time bubble of delusion and we both knew it would burst as soon as Maggie’d walk through these fucking gates”, he was yelling by now, his voice so heavy it made his chest shake while you were starting to tremble and felt tears shooting into your eyes as you stared up at him, still too shocked and startled to say anything while his yelling voice hit you again,”This was us pretending. We’ll never have that kind of life.” Tears were blurring your view now as you meet his glance, pumped up with fright, anger and desperation as you let out an upset sound. “I’m just trying to not give up”, you scoffed, though your voice was breaking as you stood up from your spot and pushed the chair angrily against the table as you glared at your husband ,”And don’t you fucking yell at me.” The first tears were rolling down your face as you turned away from him and and stumped towards the kitchen door, trembling breaths leaving your lips as you brushed them off your cheeks, “Screw this.” You were shaking as you rushed up the stairs, your face crunched up in pain and covered with tears that were running down your skin as you could still hear his voice booming through your head.  Negan never yelled at you. The last time you could remember him coming close to it was shortly after he got locked up, when helplessness and jealousy were eating him up. It had never happened again, not for all these years and the fact that it had happened now rattled you. He knew how much you hated being yelled at, he knew how much your past had sensitized you for it and you didn’t know how to handle Negan’s nor your your own emotions right now. You were both strained, both scared and it was your only explanation for his lash out. He could get loud, you’d seen it at the Sanctuary when he shut down Simon but he never lost control of himself during these moments. Not like now. When he yelled, he stayed under control and got back to business right after, so his lash out now, especially despite knowing how much you despised it was only proof of how scared and upset he truly was. This realization didn’t help though that the loudness of his voice and the cruelty of his words were pushing in on you as you let the door of your room fall with a loud thud into its lock and felt your emotions overwhelm you.  Heated up and trembling more and more tears started to shoot back into your eyes and rolled down your face as you rounded the bed and plopped down onto your side, feeling the mattress giving slightly in below you as sniffles left your lips. You were scared, you were so unbelievably scared. Scared of losing everything you’d worked for with Negan, scared of not ever finding your peace and worst of all, scared of losing Negan to a vengeful Maggie who was out for blood. If anything, walking past the graveyard had made this ugly feeling of fright only grow and you could feel the things you’d tried to shut out for the last days rolling over you.  Being scared of losing Negan after he saved Lydia. Living with the fear of not knowing if he was okay or even alive during the time he was gone.  Being nearly poisoned with Dante’s water.  Losing Siddiq. Constantly having to persuade others, especially Daryl, that Negan was up to good out there and wasn’t a threat, even during your time at the Hilltop. Finally getting Negan back and being glad to have him in safety and freedom only to have it threatened again with Maggie’s sudden reappearance merely two days later.  You were exhausted. This all had happened in such a small time span and you were unable to process it properly, nor the fear that you were feeling right now.  You were full on sobbing at this point, shaking and crouched over, with your elbows pressing into your thighs and your head buried into your hands that were practically soaked in your tears You couldn’t have her try to hurt or even kill him now only because he wasn’t in the cell anymore and stuck on the verge of taking his own life. You couldn’t keep on feeling so scared and worried all the time.  You just wanted to find your peace.  Slowly, you felt your body growing too exhausted to keep the sobs coming and instead, sniffles and small whimpers were only falling from your lips as you found yourself staring down at your wet hands, fumbling on them in a desperate try to distract yourself from your cruel thoughts. You weren’t even sure how much time exactly had passed since you’d stormed up here, your only indicator of time was the darkness that had by now taken up the firmament and the lamp on the nightstand you’d been forced to turn on, whose faint light was now falling onto you, your hands and the small diamonds of your wedding ring that glimmered in the light.  You silenced yourself as well as you could for a moment to hear the rustling that was coming up from the kitchen and living room. Negan had been quiet for a whole long time down there and now you could hear him clearly moving around. A shivering breath left your lips, unsure of what you should expect to happen before you started to hear heavy footsteps coming up the stairs, slow but steady as they started to get closer to your room. Gulping thickly you finally heard the creaking of the door as it slowly opened, while you still sat there with your back turned to him as he moved inside and softly shut the door behind him. For just another moment it stayed silent, only the slight squeaking of the floorboards below Negan’s weight was audible before you heard him speak up. ”I’m sorry”, he said, his voice heavy with guilt, so much you could hear a tremble through it,”I didn’t mean to lash out like that...I don’t know what’s going on with me, I-” He broke off, a shivering sigh filling his lips as you could hear him making a few, slow and careful steps towards the bed before he stopped again.  ”You were just trying and I went full asshole...I-...I shouldn’t have yelled at you. That was a fucking dick move...I’m sorry, I really am.” You didn’t look up yet, you were still fumbling on your hands, though you could tell that he meant it, you just didn’t know how to behave either. “I get it if you don’t wanna talk or want me to fuck off”, he breathed out, his voice still slightly trembling as he let out another sigh,”I do, I-” With the shaking of your head he halted quickly, growing silent again as you let out a small sigh. You didn’t want to fight with him. That really was the very last thing. You just wanted to talk it out and get all the shit you both had off your chests. In the end, you knew this all had only happened because you were both scared to death and while you knew that this wouldn’t just vanish you couldn’t have this fear hurt your relationship.  Slowly, you watched Negan round the bed from the corner of your eye, halting shortly before he got to you and gestured towards the spot next to you. ”Can I?” A nod of yours was enough to make Negan sit down beside you, a thick sigh falling from his lips as you could feel his glance swaying over you. The lump in your throat was quick to grow bigger again as you bit your lip and felt tears starting to fill your eyes as you finally glimpsed up at him. “I just want this fucking nightmare to end”, you said, your voice shivering and weak as your glance met his eyes that were bleary and slightly reddened as well ,”once one thing is done the next shit’s waiting for us. I hate this and I fucking hate having to have this goddamn discussion over and over again.” A heavy sigh fell from your lips as you brushed the dampness off your cheeks, sadly sure that you’d soon feel new tears running over them while your voice started to break as soon as you spoke back up again, “I don’t want Maggie to whirl everything back up and mess things up for us.” With knitted brows and sad eyes Negan glimpsed at you, pressing his lips onto one another before a stressed sound fell from his mouth. “I don’t know about the latter one but I’m sure she’s gonna whirl things up again”, he sighed, stroking over his beard while a thick gulp travelled down his throat,”Wish I could say otherwise.” You softly nodded as you could feel the tears in your eyes welling over, just in the very moment Negan reached up to stroke over your back, gently while you could tell that he was trying to hold his tears back. “But she can’t just walk in here and play boss..she’s been through a lot and that’s horrible but as soon as she’s back everybody acts as if she’s the center of the universe. Her pain isn’t more important than the one of others”, you let out, sniffling as you could feel yourself falling back into that hole of fear and panic that made you rattled and got you to all worked up again. “Carol has gone through losing a child far more than once, Michonne lost Carl and Rick, and Judith and to grow up without them”, you said, hot tears streaming down your face as it crunched up in pain and your voice grew shakier with every breath,”I’ve seen my damn family being ripped apart all at once, and you had to watch when that goddamn cancer killed Lucille.” You could see Negan nodding, could see a single tear rolling down your face as you sniffled and breathed sharply in, trying to keep your voice up even though the lump in your throat kept on growing. “Nobody’s expecting her to forgive or forget but she doesn’t get to make decisions about you, not after she just fucked off for six years and just came back cause that other community got screwed over”, you said, trying to keep talking in between the shaky breaths that shook through you before your fear took hold of you once for all and you could feel it breaking out of you as the stinging pain made itself a home inside your head. “I’m trying to see things positive but I...I’m scared”, you breathed out, your face twisting in pain as you felt yourself choking up,”I’m so so fucking scared.” You gasped for air as you could feel the thick lump in your throat keep on pressing in on you, felt the skin under your eyes becoming sore from the tears while Negan moved in, stopping his movements over your back to wrap his arm around your waist and pull you closer. “I’m scared that she’ll try to make them turn on you again and hurt you, I’m scared that I she’ll try to kill-”,your voice broke off, stopped by the sobs that started to shake through you again ,”I’m so scared of losing you, I-“ You broke completely off at that point, only able to cry now and let it all out instead of saying anything more. Negan moved in to hold your shaking body closer, grasp our legs to swing them over his lap and bring you into his embrace. You could feel him shaking too, could feel his heavy breaths and the harsh falling and rising of his chest as he cradled you against his body. You buried your head into the curve of his neck, just for once allowing all the pain and fear to flow out of your body with the sobs that erupted through you. You clung onto him as if you’d risk to lose him if you’d let go, sniffling and crying until your head was buzzing while Negan tightened his grasp on you and pressed a soft kiss against your temple. “I won’t let it come that far”, he mumbled against your skin, his voice strained though he did his best to keep it up ,”I got no damn clue how our life’s gonna turn out but I’m a tough motherfucker, right? I won’t die. I even survived those skin freaks.” He let out a shaky chuckle, audibly trying to keep his shit together for you within these moments though you deep down knew that he’d break down too. Your sobs grew quieter again and turned back into sniffles as you held onto him, desperately trying to believe his words before you slowly moved back, just enough to look at him and see the tears that were also burning in his eyes. Sniffling, you moved your hands to cup his face, stroking your thumbs over his wetted cheeks and his stubble while his bleary eyes ran over you and his arms were still keeping you close.  A thick sigh left his lips as he lowered his glance for a moment, gulping thickly before he glimpsed back up at you and shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know how to feel”, he mumbled, tears still filling his eyes up to the rim. “I feel so fucking odd...some guilt, I-”,he breathed, stopping as he shook his head and the first tears started to fall down his cheeks again,”I had so much time to think about the shit I did back then, how fucking wrong I saw things, I-...I know we’ve been through this when I hit rock bottom in that cell but...” He pressed his lips onto one another before they fell open with another shivering sigh and his teary eyes fell back on you,”There are still moments when I ask myself how you were even able to fall in love with me back then.” You could feel your heart breaking all over again as you looked at your husband, tearing up again as you stroked the tears softly off his cheeks and gulped thickly. “I already saw the man in you that you are right now”, you mumbled, sniffling as Negan’s brows knitted again and it looked like something hit him just in this moment. New tears started to roll down his cheeks as a small whimper fell from his lips and you leaned closer, sure to have him look at you. “You’re sweet, and you’re loving and protective and the world just screwed with you and made you believe that you couldn’t keep others alive without this shit”, you mumbled, brushing your thumbs again over his wetted cheeks,”But you did your best to get your head on straight.” “I just, I know what it’s like to grow up without a Dad and I-”, he mumbled with trembling lips,”I don’t know what to fuckin’ think or feel or-” “That’s okay”,you said as you could hear his voice break off,”You don’t need to put a finger on that.” Negan slowly nodded, lowering his glance for a moment as he let out a shivering breath and wrapped his arms tighter around you. “But there was no way for you to know”, you added, a feeling within you urging you to make sure that he knew that despite everything,”You didn’t deliberately kill a kid’s father. Fuck, you didn’t go for Rick that night because of Carl.” Negan’s glance was still lowered as you gulped and shifted slightly. “I know what happened was shit, I-”,you started, trying to just keep Negan from falling into that hole again that was threatening to eat him up ,”Regardless of what happened that night, you did everything in your power to show that you’re good at heart. You can’t make the past unhappen but you can change the present, and you have.” A sniffling fell from Negan’s lips as he glimpsed back up at you, yet another tear falling down his face as you leaned in closer to him. “You have”, you assured with another nod, leaning in to press a delicate kiss over his lips, allowing it to linger for a moment and let Negan melt against you before you backed just enough off to look at him and saw the doubt that was still filling his face. “I’m not sure if it’s enough, or if it matters-”, he broke off, his face scrunching up again as you let go of his face and instead wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug. Just like it had happened with you before, it was breaking out of Negan now and you could feel your emotions overwhelming you all over again as you heard your husband’s sobs that broke your heart and made that stinging pain shoot through you once more. Holding onto each other you sat on the bed, just letting it all out. Just like the both of you actually needed to. During the past time it had nearly always been either one of you trying to be strong for the other as they broke down and now the both of you just held onto each other and allowed yourselves to feel your emotions hit you with all their force.  It hurt, it hurt like hell but deep down you both knew that you needed this to unburden you, to free yourselves at least from the pressure and pain that had been weighing down on you for too long. It didn’t know how long you sat there like that on the bed, for you long you held on to each other until the sobs and whimpers got silent and you were just cuddled up against one another.  Breathing deeply through you felt Negan cradling you against his body, pressing another kiss against your temple, still remaining quiet for a moment before he spoke up, his voice still strained. “Does that offer for a bath still stand?”, he asked, backing slightly away, just enough to look at you and move his hand up to wipe the last bit of remaining wetness of your cheeks,”I think we could use that.” Slowly, you nodded, taking only another moment before you moved your legs off his lap and stood up, groaning slightly as you needed to feel your body adjusting to standing again after remaining in nothing else but an embryo position for the last while. Negan moved up as well, stretching his long limbs before he grasped your hand and moved it up to place a kiss on its back, giving you another loving look before he lead you towards the bathroom.

Hot water quickly started to pelt into the bathtub and filled it up step by step, while Negan moved towards the cabinet by the sinks, to look for some bath oils or bombs before he looked up into the mirrors and let out a strained chuckle. “Fuck we both look puffed up like a baboon’s ass”, he mumbled, looking from the mirror back at you as you let out a small laugh, seeing your mirror image that looked just like you expected. Your eyes were red and puffy, already a little less swollen than they must have been back at the bed but still more than enough to know how long the both of you had sat there and let your emotions take themselves out on you. Negan let out a small groan as he crouched down to move through the stuff in the cabinet, pushing a couple bottles of shampoo to the side before he got a look at the bathing supplies and eventually pulled a bathbomb out that was a wild swirled mix of blue and purple. “This one’s with lavender”, he said, getting back on his feet as he held it up for you,”Think we could use some of that calming shit, huh?” You quickly nodded, very much agreeing with him on this. Your head was still buzzing, clearly exhausted by all the crying and you could need something as calming as the scent of lavender to soothe you a little. Moving back towards you Negan plopped the little ball into the water, quickly seeing it go out in all of its color variety as it spread through the water that kept on streaming into the tub. “Looks like unicorn puke”, Negan joked, nodding towards the lilac water and the bubbles the spread over its surface and got bigger and bigger with every passing moment. “Yeah, it does...doesn’t smell like it tho”, you mumbled with a small chuckle back, slowly freeing yourself from the shroud of exhaustion the while in the bedroom had put on you. Things obviously still weren’t the way you both wanted them, but you felt a little less bottled up and tense, and most importantly less burdened after giving your emotions the valve they needed. ”And it has surprise bubbles. That’s nice”, you added, nodding towards the bubbles that had by now taking in all of the surface while Negan nodded with a crooked grin and started to peel the clothes off his body. “C’mon let’s get outta that shit”, he grumbled as he pulled his shirt over his head and pushed his pants down his hips while you started to do the same, peeling yourself out of your clothes step by step until you could only feel the warm bathroom air covering your skin. Groaning, Negan crouched a little down and leaned over to shut the tap off and dip his hand into the bathwater, testing it before he looked with a small grin over his shoulder “Don’t wanna burn my dick.” “Yeah I can’t have that”, you teased back, bringing the grin on his face to widen a little and bring some warmth back into you after seeing him so devastated all evening long. “It’s good though, we can get in”, he mumbled before he carefully stepped into the water and let out a satisfied groan as soon as he lowered his body into the tub and stretched his hand out for you to join him. Quickly, you took it, moving in and feeling the warmth of the water surrounding your feet before you lowered yourself to sink in between Negan’s legs.  “This is nice”, you mumbled as the warm water and its soothing scent started to surround you and Negan moved in to gently pull you against his wet chest. His arms wrapped around you as he nuzzled his nose into the curve of your neck and breathed deeply out, cradling you softly while it got quiet again and a silence set in. You didn’t break it, didn’t fall back with him into your usual goofiness that you’d have in these moments but instead, just closed your eyes and enjoyed his closeness, his warmth and the hot water.  That was all that you needed right now, a break of everything that was currently happening around you and a relief of the ordeal you’d both put yourselves through this evening, and for once, it felt like you were truly able to focus and think about nothing else but this bath and the man who was holding you in his arms. You just remained like that with him, only feeling him scooping some water over your shoulders and arms from time to time or drawing small, lazy patterns over your skin with his fingers, though mostly, you just laid cuddled up to each other within the water’s warmth.  You enjoyed it, all of it, Negan’s touches, the soothing scent and the hotness of the water until it started to grow cold and you switched it for the warmth of the bed.  Held by Negan, with your back pressed against his chest and his arms wrapped around you you found yourself laying underneath the sheets, feeling him nuzzling his nose against your neck while your fingers softly and lightly brushed over his arm, just as he liked it. You were still soothing one another, still trying to reassure one another that you’d figure things out along the way, step by step no matter what the world would throw at you, just like you had always done. With a sleepy sigh you felt Negan adjusting himself a little, pressing a delicate kiss against the side of your neck before he interrupted the caresses of your fingers and moved his arm up, just enough for his hand to gently grasp your face and make you look at him in the faint moon light that streamed into the room. “We got each other, always”, he mumbled as his thumb softly stroked over your cheek and his drowsy eyes softened as he glanced down at you,”No matter what happens. No matter who tries to fuck with us...we got each other.”

[league-of-thots]

YeeHawks

Pairing: Hawks x female reader

Word Count: 3.3k+

Warnings: 18+, alcohol, riding, is cowboy kink a warning?

A/N: not the way y’all wanted me to return, but the way y’all deserve lol. i didnt really have the energy to give it an in depth edit but sometimes it be like that

         You wipe the sweat from your brow, the sun is high in the bright, cloudless sky. It means that the heat is just pouring down in waves from the sky though, and you curse the fact that you’d agreed to switch shifts with one of the other farmhands that had asked you the day before. Part of you wants to find Kirishima and reem him out, but you know he’s a sweetheart and wouldn’t have ever done something that would make things harder for you on purpose.

         Having said that, imagining giving the man a piece of your mind makes it easier for you to grit your teeth and put your back into heaving large packets of grains into a wheelbarrow for the pigs, so that you wouldn’t have to make as many trips. Instead, it would just be one hellish trip, and a lot less walking in the heat.

         Wiping the stray dirt on your pants you sigh. You feel sticky and can feel the grit on your face, on your arms. You must smell something fierce, though you know compared to the pigs you’d be feeding in a few minutes, you smelt like a bed of flowers.

         You feel the strain on your back as you finally finish loading the wheelbarrow and start to haul it over to the south side of the Academy farm. The ground is rough, and you feel the jarring of the weight in your shoulders, you’re going to be so sore tomorrow.

         After you finish feeding the pigs, you take the supplies back to where they belong and head off to start some of your final tasks of the day. One is milking the cows, and the other being your favourite, plowing some of the dirt to prepare for the new season.

         Is it a bit stupidly cliché that you love riding the big tractor while the sun lowers in the sky? Maybe. Is it worth it? Absolutely. It’s one of the best views you’ve seen in your life. Plus, it always helps clear your mind from a day of hard work so that when you enter one of the farmhouses, you’re ready to do whatever else you need to get done.

         When you park the tractor back to its spot in the barn, you see a few of the other farmhands talking together. They’re laughing with one another, and you wave to them as you walk out with your overcoat and keys.

         You’re in a daze until you realize you’ve somehow already started up a warm shower, standing under the steam to relieve your body from the stress of the day. Your muscles feel so much better with the hot water on them and the steam makes you feel as if you’re in stasis. It’s good because tomorrow is going to be a big day, the August festival, a celebration that the community holds as a sort of last hurrah before the season gets busy once again.

         After you’re clean and put together, you head downstairs to have a quick conversation with the couple other farmhands that share the house with you. You need to check if there’s anything else you need to do to help with the final preparations for tomorrow. The four of you had made some homebrew cider to share with the other townspeople, and it tasted quite good, despite being a little heavy on the alcohol. But nobody would be complaining about that, of course.

         “Mmm, I think its fine.” Mina says, faced scrunched up in thought. “We did pretty well with it for sure.”

         “I agree,” you reply. “Just wanted to make sure I could pass out for the night. I’m fucking dead.” She laughs a little at that.

         “Gotta make sure you have the energy for tomorrow. I hear that it’s going to be extra wild.” She waggles her eyebrows. “You know that there’s going to be a horse-ridin’ performance from our sheriff’s department, but there’s also gonna be some cowboys over here to show off some of their skills too.”

         You’re slightly intrigued at that. Maybe, you’ll even get to see him again… but, better not get your hopes up too much. Instead, you say, “That would definitely be a treat for all the hard work that this year’s been.”

         Mina nods sagely at that. “If I see that blonde, twink of a cowboy I’m goin’ to make him my bitch. Because I deserve it.” That brings a snort out of you, but you pray a little for Denki if you do see him tomorrow, because lord knows he’s going to need it.

         The two of you chat for a little while longer before you wish her a good night and head up to get some rest. You do have a busy day to get ready for after all.

           You wake up early the next day, ready to quickly get your tasks done so you can let loose with friends and community members that night. You wish that you don’t have to do any work, but you can’t have everything you want.

         So, you drag yourself out of bed, muscles tight and body sore, to quickly grab a protein bar and a cleaner pair of working clothes. Your overalls are starting to sport holes and there are some dark stains that just won’t ever come off. You need new ones, you think, as you walk towards the horse pen.

         You love the horses, how sweet most of them are and how peaceful it is in their separated area. It’s especially nice in the early morning, with a crisp breeze and the sun peeking out on the horizon. You grab the feed mix that someone had mixed the day before and drag it over to the troughs, where there are already some of the animals waiting for you to arrive. The horses have learned to expect people in the morning, and some of the more assertive ones wait at the fence to be the first ones to get to eat.

         While they feed, you prepare the cleaning tools inside the small stable that is connected to the fenced off pen. You take each horse that’s finished eating into the small shelter to clean their hooves, brush out their mane and body, and then your favourite part, riding them for a few laps of the enclosure to make sure they run a bit each day.

         It’s while you’re dismounting a cute mare named Starlight when you hear a low whistle from behind you. Someone’s obviously been watching you, and sitting there just outside the enclosure.

“Damn, baby, wonder if you could ride me as good as those horses there.” You feel a vein ticking in your head as you recognize the voice. He’s supposed to be getting ready for the group event, not bothering you while you try to get some fucking work done before you can finally relax and celebrate.

         You turn your body and inwardly groan as your suspicions are confirmed, sitting there waiting is a certain cowboy who’s always managed to piss you off greatly every time one of his short visits brings him to the UA farms.

         “Hello, Hawks.” You grit your teeth as you move towards the next horse that you’re about to take care of.

         “I’m wounded, really, that you don’t sound pleased ta see me, angel.” There’s a satisfied smirk on his face. He really does get off on toying around with you and seeing how much he can piss you off. So, you take a deep breath and calm yourself.

         “Now, why would you expect anything different? I haven’t forgotten the last time you came aroun’-“

         He waves you off. “You’re bein’ ridiculous. It was a harmless joke.”

         “I had to clean the stables for TWO WEEKS.” He just laughs at your anger, totally unphased. It grinds your gears more, the cheeky grin on his face that charms everyone around him, whittling down your intense irritation.

         “Well, if anythin’ everyone else certainly enjoyed it.” You grumble out some choice words about him, making sure they’re loud enough for him to here, as you start brushing out the mane of the mare in front of you. He seems pleased with himself, leaning on the fence, head on his hands.

         “Do you not have somewhere to be? Something you should be practicing for?” He lazily waves away your attempts to get him away from the work you’d like to finish up.

         “Who needs practice? I know exactly what I’ve gotta do so there’s no real reason for me to waste my energy before the actual performance.” He says it with a casual arrogance, that you know comes from years of experience and absolute confidence in his abilities. “The only thing I wanna do right now is try all of the good I know y’all made for the party tonight.”

         You give him an unimpressed look. “Just because we know each other does not mean that I’m going to just give you the cider meant for the community.” He pouts “You can try it when everyone else does later.”

         “Yeah, but we have a special connection.” He grins and you splutter, embarrassed and trying to put away the memories of your bodies pressed together and calloused fingers in your cunt.

         “Jesus, Hawks. Shut up.” You look around furtively, checking to see if anyone would’ve overheard.

         “You like me loud.” God, his smug look makes you feel hot and bothered.

         “Get outta here so I can finish my work, damn it.” He just laughs, turning around before turning back.

         “You better save me some of the goodies y’all made up for after the performance.”

         “Yeah, whatever,” you grumble, face flushed and mind now distracted with memories of Hawks’ hands tangled in your hair.

           “Well, now. This is delicious.” Your eyes follow his tongue that darts out to lick the drop of the cider that had dripped onto his lips. You’d made sure to fill a plate up with the treats that had been spread around the outdoor tables, lanterns hung up around them not only for ease of finding them, but also to light up the evening. “You helped make this?”

         “Yup. You wouldn’t believe how difficult it was between never having done it before and Mina’s enthusiasm. God bless Momo, without her we wouldn’t have gotten it done.��� He laughs, and you can’t help that you can’t keep your eyes off of him.

         He was slightly sweaty from his earlier performance, which had been perfectly executed, tank top tucked into worn jeans with a feather-like buckle. His eyes are scanning the crowd around as the two of you lean on the outside of the saloon, the inside being too filled with inebriated or high adults to even try to squeeze into a seat.

         “So, how’s life been around here since I last visited?” he asks between bites of some spicey brisket, obviously enjoying it.

         “Ah, not much. Just the usual social drama. Actually, Shinsou almost got his dick sliced off by some machinery someone had fucked around with. I swear to god that man has the worst luck I’ve ever seen.”

         “Holy shit, sure does sound like it.”

         “But yeah, it’s just living day to day for me now. Not much new happens out here, as you very well know.” He shrugs.

         “Might as well see. What’s even keeping you here, then?”

         “Not everyone needs to be on the road their whole life to be happy, Hawks.”

         “I suppose. More cider?”

         “Sure.”

           You’ve drank way too much, you know that. But the fuzziness in your head just makes you want to keep going, to have fun and make up for all the time you lose working long hours every day.

         Besides, Hawks is there beside you, egging you on and matching you drink for drink. His hands always seem to be on your body, either squeezing your ass, wrapped around your shoulders or waist. It makes you feel warm, and you know he’s teasing you, trying to rile you up. He wants to see how bothered he can make you before you snap and drag him off to some private place.

         You’re determined to beat him out though. So, you lean into his body space and trace your hands over his arms, the insides of his wrists. You hear his breath hitch, though his attention is kept on whatever conversation is happening in front of you.

         Of course, this is Hawks, who has just as much patience as a saint, despite being as far from one as possible. But you’re drunk and turned on and the teasing is too much for you to handle, so when there’s a brief pause in the activity around the two of you, you pull him down so you can whisper in his ear how much you want him.

         He grins, “Might as well head back to your place then.” You agree and drag him with you.

         The moment you’re in the house, you wrap your arms around his neck so you can bring his lips to yours. Its messy and rushed, but it’s relieving at the same time. The two of you have done this enough in the few times that he passes through that he’s comfortable enough to let you take charge for a bit.

         “You can’t even wait ‘til we’re upstairs, sugar?” he chuckles, drawing out each word. You feel the rumble of them, pressed up as you are against his chest.

         “Shut up, Hawks.” You grumble, pulling him towards your room if that’s what it’ll take to get his dick out faster.

         After rushing in the room, you kick the door shut behind you and immediately get back to kissing him. This time, he makes more of an effort to assert himself, holding your face in his hands and licking into your mouth. You sigh into him, your hands finding his heated skin beneath his shirt as the pace slows down from the frantic rush it had been. It becomes sensual, and you can feel him getting more aroused as he slowly shifts his hands, starting to grind into you.

         You pull away from him, getting some air as you start to take off his shirt. He enthusiastically moves to help and you get to admire his muscles stretch as he does. Obviously, life constantly on the road does wonders for your abs.

         “You too, sugar. You’re gonna make me feel underdressed.” He says as he moves to take off the rest of his garments. A laugh slips out of you as you hastily get out of your outfit. When you turn your attention back to him, he’s sitting on the bed and he gestures for you to join him.

         When you do, he kisses you again, intensely, as he guides you onto your back. You sigh as he kisses down the side of your jaw to mark your neck, reaching blindly for the lube and condoms beside the bed.

         He quickly slides it on and you hear the squelching of lube as he moves in a rush. You don’t have time to make fun of him though, because as soon as he’s finished, he spreads your legs and puts the head of his dick at your entrance.

         He groans, closing his eyes as he enters you, and its uncomfortable for a little bit. Soon enough though, you relax, and start to feel great as he moves his hips slowly against you. Hawks fucks deeply, you know this from your times before, but each time it feels just as tantalizing as the last.

         “Hawks, please.” You pant, trying to wiggle a little bit just to get some friction, some tiny relief for the edging you’ve been through. He just gives you a smirk, as he keeps you completely locked between him and the mattress. You tense so hard he groans on top of you, but he doesn’t let you move, dick still sitting snug inside your cunt.

         “Well, let’s see those barebacking skills you were showin’ off earlier then, hmm?” he says, his voice low and gruff. With ease, he gets the both of you turned around so you’re now sitting with your ass on his thighs, hands clamped tight on your waist keeping you in place while he lays back on the headboard. He nods satisfactorily, looking you up and down with lidded eyes. “Y’know, I like this view much better, baby. What a pretty picture you make right on top of me.” Part of you wants to roll your eyes, but the warmth that his words give you makes the impulse disappear.

         “You know, Hawks, in order for me to show you said skills, you’re going to have to let me move.” He laughs as you try and lift yourself against the pressure he’s putting, obviously unable to really do anything. “Seriously, you dick, lemme move.”

         “But the face you make when I play these little games with you is so cute, sugar.” He’s got a faux innocent smile across his face and you pout and cross your arms in response. “Okay, okay, I’m done. I promise,” he says, letting off all the pressure, but keeping the two of you connected at the hips.

         “Thank you.” you quip, starting a quicker pace than the one Hawks had been setting, gravity still making it just as deep as before.

         Being drunk obviously makes Hawks that much louder, or maybe it’s the change up in position, you can’t be sure. But, his praises, his deep moans, the lewd noises from the slapping of your body against his hips, it all makes you feel hot as hell.

         You look down, seeing Hawks’ eyes widened and excited, he grins when he notices your look and begins to rock up into you. You throw your head back in as he hits deep within you, crying out his name. Hearing it obviously enthuses him as he grunts in exertion, starting to thrust upwards harder, and you feel your body responding, muscles tightening as you get closer to your climax.

         “God, you’re gorgeous like this, y’know?” he gets out through gritted teeth. “I’m not going to be able to last much longer…” He’s panting, fingers digging into your hips sharply, sure to leave marks.

         “Please, I wanna cum Hawks!”

         “Tell me what you need, sugar, I’ll give it to you.” Hearing that makes you smile, he was always so attentive to your needs.

         “Touch me…”

         “You gotta tell me where for that.” Even when so close to his climax, somehow, Hawks manages to be cheeky. However, when he’s fucking you this well, it’s much easier to let the teasing roll off your back.

         “My clit, Hawks. You do know what that is, right?” He lets out a genuine laugh at that, before sending one hand down towards the bundle of nerves.

         It’s enough, between the stimulation and the deep thrusts into your cunt, that you feel yourself tighten and cry out, cumming hard onto his cock. You lean into him, kissing him hard as pleasure courses through your body.

         He works you through it, breathing heavily, you can feel his pulse skittering under your hands. You feel him twitch within you, and an idea forms in your mind. Mind wrapped up in pleasure, you act on the thought immediately, bringing your hands to his chest to play with his nipples.

         He loves it, making keening noises as you work, legs shaking with effort to stay up and keep pace with him. You let him take the lead and you hear him shout and arch up as you pinch his buds, feeling him release.

         He thrusts a couple more times, lazily and slowly, kissing the top of your head as you settle down to lie on his chest for a few minutes.

         You breath deeply, content in the moment. You know after you clean up and rest, he’ll be gone on the road once again, so you relax, enjoying the presence.

[cheri-translates]

Headcanon - Fights with the guys

[ this Ask was wheelbarrowed over from @cheri-cheri​ ]

Hello~ Angst is inevitable with such a prompt, but I hope the fluffiness at the end makes up for it! (´･ᴗ･ ` ) Lucien isn’t here because I’m not familiar with his character :<

[ Gavin - spending too much time apart ]

It begins with a pang of disappointment when a date she’s been looking forward to for weeks gets interrupted halfway by a phone call

With that, Gavin gets whisked away abruptly for a month-long mission

During the first week, she cheers herself up with a reminder that Gavin is doing something noble - keeping the streets of Loveland City safe.

During the second week, she consoles herself with the knowledge that this isn't the first time Gavin has been uncontactable for a long period of time. Shouldn’t she have gotten used to it by now?

During the third week, doubt creeps in. Despite him telling her in advance that the mission site could lack a proper signal, the heaviness in MC’s chest gets weightier with each unread message and unanswered call.

She doesn’t know if her boyfriend is dead or alive.

She doesn’t even know where he is.

During the fourth week, she’s frustrated. She's frustrated at the STF, at Gavin, and at herself.

She’s frustrated that this isn’t the first time the STF has deployed Gavin on missions at short notice, as though he’s simply a tool ready to be wielded at any moment.

The frequency of missions over the past few months suddenly skyrocketed. It’s the main reason why she was looking forward to the date before he left - she wanted him to get a proper rest.

She’s frustrated that there doesn't seem to be anything she can do about the situation.

She's frustrated that the days without him pass by so painfully slowly.

She’s frustrated that-

“MC, I’m back.”

The fight is a quiet affair.

It might not even be considered one, since MC is the one doing most of the talking. She pours out everything in her heart, and how she’s very, very tired.

She doesn’t know if she can continue being in this relationship if she's going to be the only party in it.

Gavin listens quietly.

Then, he takes out two plane tickets from his pocket

The reason why he was deployed on so many missions recently was because he actively volunteered for them. That way, he would be able to clock in enough hours to take her on a long, undisrupted vacation

He intended for it to be a surprise, but didn’t expect that his actions would make MC upset instead

Aside from this, they also try to make future time apart more bearable:

When Gavin knows that he’d be embarking on a mission where remaining contactable is an issue, he would write a bunch of letters beforehand and entrust them to Minor, who would secretly place one on her office desk every morning

The letters vary in length. They could be entire pages filled with a somewhat clumsy yet heartwarming documentation of what went through his mind on certain dates they had together... 

Or a simple: I love you. I’ll be safe. I can’t wait to come home.

MC finds out very easily who Gavin’s “messenger pigeon” is, and she forces Minor to hand over the entire box just in case he loses it or decides to take a peek out of curiosity (which he already did)

Meanwhile, MC leaves tons of voice messages in Gavin’s phone for him whenever he needs a pick-me-up.

They could range from her reading works from Byron’s Poetry Collection, or a clip of her playing the piano...

Or a simple: I love you. Be safe. I’m waiting for you to come home. 

[ KIRO - the fatigue of a secret relationship ]

Initially, MC thought that having a secret relationship with a world renowned celebrity would be as thrilling as what’s typically depicted in TV dramas

Whenever they go on dates outside the studio or their homes, Kiro has to disguise himself with various props

e.g. wearing an ugly wig, donning oversized sunglasses, peppering his face with fake freckles, and even changing the tone of his voice

While it was funny the first few times, it gets exhausting after a while.

It’s mentally exhausting to always be on the look out for paparazzi and discerning fans at the expense of enjoying the date and each other’s company

It’s emotionally exhausting to see gossip magazines speculating about Kiro’s relationships with gorgeous women in the entertainment industry

It’s exhausting when her mind wanders afar off, leading her to ask:

“Are you... ashamed of me?”

The fight is one akin to daggers to his heart.

“Of course not! Miss Chips, why would that even cross your mind?” 

Kiro explains that he’s more than capable of renting entire restaurants, and even the entire amusement park so he can remove all his stuffy props and be with her without worrying about the fans

But at the same time, he wants their relationship to be as normal as possible.

Because when he’s with her, he doesn’t feel like Kiro the celebrity. He’s simply a boy in love who wants to go on normal dates like any normal couple would

He doesn’t want MC to get tied down by having every social media post and every move scrutinised by the public.

But MC has considered all of this. And she's ready to shoulder the relationship with him - both the good and bad.

Eventually, when the time is right, and after much discussion with Savin and the PR department, MC and Kiro go public with their relationship

He starts doing livestreams more often where he does cute couple activities with MC, in the hopes that his fans are won over by her just as much as he is

It turns out that MC wins his fans over a little too much

Sometimes, they even ask Kiro to step aside and let MC take over his livestream instead QAQ

[ SHAW - good intentions gone wrong ]

“I’m grabbing dinner with Minor and Gavin. Want to join us?”

“Eli and Gavin were telling me about the new dishes in Lynn’s Kitchen. We should drop by sometime.”

“That tin of biscuits? Gavin gave it to me. Help yourself to them!”

...

For some unfathomable reason, MC has been bringing up his brother in their conversations every day over the past two weeks

When he sees MC putting on Gavin’s ginkgo bracelet before heading out, he finally snaps.

“Since you’re always going on and on about Gavin, why not date him instead?!”

The fight is one he wishes he could take back.

“I’m not... You’ve got it all wrong! Gavin’s been wanting to meet you, and I-”

“You don’t know anything about me.”

MC flinches at Shaw’s harsh tone.

Then, she averts her eyes, hoping her tears wouldn’t spill out

“Yeah, I clearly don’t.”

And she runs out of the apartment, and into the storm.

After chugging down a can of iced Cola, Shaw more or less cools down

In the process, it dawns on him that MC does know many things about him that he’s never shared with anyone else

She’s caught the nostalgic gaze in his eyes when he talked about the little guardian who held his hand from the moment he first started walking

The little guardian who had fathomless patience for his endless ‘why’s

His very first best friend, and someone he could rely on.

And how the little plane from so many years ago wasn’t the only important thing he left behind that day.

And right now, he’s close to losing another important person.

Ignoring the dampness on his face, he grabs his phone and calls MC, before realising that she left her phone in the apartment

So, he sends his first text to Gavin.

Together, they manage to locate MC, who’s drying herself off in the rehearsal room of Live House.

“I’m sorry.”

Shaw’s apology is soft, but it reaches the hearts of two people.

Before Gavin turns to leave, Shaw calls after him.

“Thanks. Your bracelet was of some use.”

Of course, Gavin will never tell him that he doesn’t actually need it to find MC

“Cough, no problem.”

Although the estranged relationship between the brothers requires much more than a stormy night to mend, having dinner together is a promising start.

-

Just want to put it out there that it isn’t confirmed if Shaw and Gavin are brothers. It’s a very sensitive topic within the CN community where a sizeable portion of the players believe they aren’t, and the players aren’t afraid to tear you down if you believe otherwise LOL

But for me personally, I love the idea of them being brothers!

[ VICTOR ]

I couldn’t think of any major things they could fight about aside from his sharp tongue. But that’s painfully cliché so I shall just leave you with two petty reasons why they would argue instead:

Whenever MC visits Souvenir, she doodles on the serviette while waiting for the food. She eventually makes it a habit to draw really awful caricatures of Victor and laughs over them with Mr Mills. Victor gets all pouty because he can hear their laughter from the kitchen but is missing out on the fun :<

Victor decides to test MC one day, and gives her a pudding from a convenience store instead of his. MC does taste the difference but doesn’t say anything because she thinks Victor is just having a bad day. On the other hand, he gets irritated because HOW DARE SHE mistake this low-grade jiggly thing for his perfect pudding??

[noladyme]

La Cuervo - Chapter 17

She is used to the biker-life, having grown into a woman in the familiar embrace of SAMCRO. A bad decision and a gun-shot later, she gets whisked off to Santo Padre, and put under the protection of another club. What is supposed to be a short stint in the Mayan headquarters just north of the border to Mexico, turns into something more; when la quervo begins to develop feelings for el angel - and he seems to return them in kind...

TW: violence, blood, drug use, alcohol, smut, fluff, angst

In the spirit of "The Crown Princess of Charming", this is a story about O.C. Nina and Angel Reyes. It is obviously non-canon, as characters who have passed on, on Mayans M.C., are present in it, and others have been excluded completely. Nina is written as a cis-female, but I have tried to keep her race and looks as ambigous as possible. Should you find any of this story offensive, please let me know.

17.

They spent the rest of the day cleaning the house, until it was probably cleaner than it ever had been. To Angel’s – and admittedly her own – great regret, it was sundown by the time they finished; not leaving time for any naked fun. Not that Angel hadn’t tried – and almost succeeded – in having his way with Nina on the kitchen floor. Only the fact that she felt an empty pack of smokes poke her in the back, made her insist he get off her, and get back to work.

They took Felipe’s truck to the scrap-yard. Nina didn’t mention Angel’s bike, knowing that the fact that it was busted, was a sore subject. Gilly opened the gate for them, and shot Nina a bright smile through the window. He nodded meaningfully at Angel, who gave him a half smile in return. Angel seemed very out of his element when they got out of the truck in front of the clubhouse; and almost naked without his cut. Nina took his hand, and squeezed it encouragingly, leading him towards the porch.

EZ and Coco were waiting for them outside the door, and Coco gave his former patch-brother a half hug, before looking at Nina. “You gotta talk to Chuck, niña… He didn’t do so good with you leaving like that”, he said. Nina sighed deeply, before turning to look at Chucky; who was coming out of the garage. She got off the porch, and walked over to him. “Chucky, I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to leave without saying goodbye. And taking money from the cashbox; I know that messed with your books…”. Chucky scowled at her. “I’m not angry about that. Being angry is a waste of time”, he said. “But I amdisappointed in you”. It was like a slap to the face. Chucky had never said anything like it before. “I’m… I understand”, she said. “Do you? I was very worried about you. You could have gotten yourself hurt, or someone could have taken you; and I just didn’t know!”, he said. “You know better than that”. “I do… Can you forgive me?”. Chucky sighed. “Of course I forgive you”, he said. “But don’t ever do that again!”. He raised one of his two real fingers, and wagged it at her. Nina smiled slightly. “I promise…”, she said. She leaned forwards, and kissed his cheek. Chucky patted her shoulder, and slipped away to finish some task or other.

Nina went back onto the porch, where Gilly had joined the others waiting for her. “He was worried about you”, Coco said. “Wouldn’t even eat the pistachios Gilly cracked for him”. “That took a long ass time, too”, Gilly muttered. “Can we just go inside, so I can make one apology to cover everything I did, at one time?”, Nina sighed. “Come on”, EZ said, and opened the door for them to step inside.

The whole charter was gathered in the clubhouse. EZ went behind the bar – joining Camille, who had apparently become Nina’s substitute while she was away – and Gilly and Coco went over to join Riz and Creeper by the pool table. They weren’t playing, but stood there; deep in conversation. Angel stayed by the door, seeming unsure what to do with his hands. In the end, he settled on putting them in his pockets. Bishop, Taza and Hank came out of templo, and moved towards Nina and Angel with determined but calm steps. They stopped in front of them. Nina swallowed thickly, and looked around at all the faces trained in her direction. “Before we start, I just wanna say that I’m sorry…”, she said. “I went back on my deal with all of you, and I know you were worried about me”. “We’ll get to that”, Bishop said. “You need to step aside”. “Bishop…”, Nina tried. She felt Angel straighten his stance behind her; and she felt the urge to turn around and throw herself at him; so that he could use her as a human shield. “It’s not your place to meddle in this”, Hank said. Nina frowned at him, and was about to speak, when Taza held up his hands. “Nina, this is how it is. You know that”. Angel slipped an arm around her waist, and pulled her close. He kissed her temple. “It’s ok, cuervo. Go”, he said. He looked at EZ, who came over, and led her away, with a firm hand on her shoulder. Nina’s knees and hands where shaking, and she felt her heart beating almost painfully. She knew how MC’s worked; and what Angel had done, could mean either a beating, or something much worse. You didn’t turn your back on the club; and you certainly didn’t disrespect the patch. She should never have asked him to come.

Angel shrugged defeatedly. “I just came to get my ink blacked out, Bish’”, he said earnestly. “Shut the fuck up”, Hank said. He clearly had no intention of helping him out with that. Nina swallowed thickly, and clenched her fists. Bishop looked seriously at Angel. “You know how it is, Angel”. “I know”, Angel said, and seemingly readied himself for the worst. He shot Nina a look and a small smile. I love you, he seemed to be saying. “Taza…”, Bishop said, and the VP handed him a bundle of something. He held it in his hands for a few moments, before throwing it at Angel; who caught it mid-air. He unfolded it to reveal his cut. Bishop raised his brows at him. “Don’t ever step into this clubhouse without that patch on your back again", he said. “That’s a fine”. Angel looked confused for a moment, before nodding. “Yeah… I mean, no. Whatever you say, prez’”. Angel put on his cut, before taking Bishop’s outstretched hand. The president pulled him in for a half hug, and patted his back. Nina audibly let out a relieved sigh, and Bishop turned to look at her. “Beers”, he said, and went to sit down. Taza and Hank both hugged Angel in turn; and after them, the rest of the bikers greeted their prodigal brother. Nina delighted in the sight, and Angel shot a happy smile her way. Creeper snuck over to give her a warm hug. “Welcome home, Nina”, he said. “Thanks, Creep”, she grinned.

Smiling and feeling much better than she had a few minutes ago, she went behind the bar to get everyone’s favorite beer, but noticed that someone had messed with her system. “Where’s the Bohemia?”, she asked Camille. “Bottom shelf”, Camille muttered. “But that’s Bishop’s favorite”, Nina chuckled. “It should be on the top”. Camille smiled uncomfortably. “Sorry…”, she said. Nina gave her a bright smile. “No, don’t worry about it”, she said. “Thanks for holding down the fort while I was away”. “So you’re back for good?”, Camille asked. “It looks like it”, Nina grinned. She began lining up the beers on the bar counter, and EZ went to hand them out to the Mayans. “How have you been? Did you heal up ok?”. “I’m ok”, Camille shrugged. “And Creeper and you…?”, Nina smirked. She was in a better mood than she had been in quite a while. “We’re… I don’t know”, Camille said. She looked towards the pool table, where Riz and Angel had set up a game. “Do you think Riz would be interested in giving it another shot with me?”. Nina shook her head confusedly. “I… don’t know”, she said. “I guess I thought you were with Creep now”. “Yeah, but Riz is secretary”, Camille shrugged. Nina frowned a little at her words, before shrugging them off. “His loss, Camille”, she said. “You’ll find someone”. Camille’s eyes scanned the room. “Yeah…”, she said. EZ was about to grab a bottle of Sol, but Camille nabbed it before he could. “I got this”, she smiled, and slipped out from behind the bar; sauntering over to Hank, and setting down the beer in front of him. She gave him a flirtatious smile, and hovered by the table for a few moments, before muttering something about lipstick, and moving towards the bathroom. Hank seemed confused and slightly amused at her behavior.

Nina looked at the performance with wide eyes, before chuckling to herself; and turning to grab drinks for Coco and Gilly, who’d come over to the bar. “I told you”, Coco said. “Screwing her way into the family”. “And up the ladder”, Gilly muttered, and took a swig of his beer. “You, me and Creeper were a bump in the road. Secretario… Sergeant… Didn’t she try it on with Taza last night?” “Yeah. He shut it down”, Coco said. Nina chewed her lips to keep from laughing. She was quite sure Camille was missing a very specific body part that Taza found attractive in his partners; but it wasn’t her place to say. “I’m not part of this conversation”, she said, and grabbed a beer for herself, before going over to watch the pool-game. She gave Camille a friendly smile, as she came back from the bathroom, and took a leisurely stroll around the room.

Angel seemed to have gotten his biker-mojo back. The color had returned to his personality with his cut; and he slipped one arm around Nina when she joined him by the table. “Hey, mami”, he grinned, and attacked her mouth in a devouring kiss. Nina laughed against his lips. “There are people around!”, she said. “We could show them what a good wheelbarrow looks like”, Angel grinned, and grabbed her bottom with a firm hand. Nina looked at Riz with wide eyes. “You told him what I said…?”, she exclaimed. Riz shrugged. “Thought maybe he’d have some pointers”, he grinned. Bishop came over to the table and looked at the three of them with an amused expression. “If we’re all done laughing at Nina’s sex-life, we have a couple of things we need to discuss”, he said. Nina tore herself from Angel, and gave Riz a playful pat over the back of his head. “Not the hair!”, he groaned.

They all went to sit down around one of the larger tables. Apparently, a gavel wasn’t needed for the conversation, as they weren’t going in to templo; but everyone still sat around the table as they would have in there. There weren’t chairs enough for Nina to sit down, but as she was needed for what was to be discussed, she took a seat on Angel’s lap. EZ went for refills, and Camille sauntered over to the table to join them. She looked for a free chair, and finding none, she apparently decided to follow Nina’s example, by smiling brightly at Hank; and trying to sit down on his lap. “Whoa, honey. This is a club meeting”, he chuckled, and caught her by the hips, to keep her standing. His voice was warm, clearly trying to not make Camille feel bad about her faux pass. The red-head looked at Nina. “But I thought…”. “Time to go home, Camille”, Creeper said. He didn’t seem very happy about the fact that the girl he’d nursed back to health, and liked enough to take on trips to the ocean, was throwing her goods at his brothers. Camille frowned embarrassedly. “Ok… See you tomorrow, everyone”, she said, and headed for the door. EZ stood in the doorway, and watched her walk away, before closing the door, and nodding to Bishop.

“Alright. It looks like we got everyone here…”, the president said, and looked around at the people around the table. “This has been a weird fucking week; but we got our den-mother back behind the bar, so we should be good from here on out”. He didn’t mention that Angel had been gone as well, and Angel seemed relieved. Things were back to normal; at least somewhat. “You all know about Palo’s ultimatum”. “Nina’s head on a platter, or war”, Creeper said. “Neither option is viable in my opinion”. The men around the table all nodded, and Angel squeezed Nina’s hip gently. “You’re right. So, to avoid either outcome, we do something else. We let Palo think he’s getting Nina, when really, we’re giving him our snitch”. “I don’t like it”, Nina said. Bishop looked at her, clearly not as used to women speaking in a club meeting, as Filip was. “Well, what do you suggest, then?”, he said.

“You should just let me do what I planned all along”, Angel said. “Which is…?”, Taza said. “Angel…”, EZ said from behind the bar. He shook his head. Nina swallowed thickly. “I didn’t come back here to just go along with you plan, Bishop”, she said. The president narrowed his eyes at her. “Because it’s dangerous”, Angel said. “No”, Nina said. “Because, like I said, I don’t want anyone else dying on my account”. “Then why did you come back?”, Taza asked. Nina sighed. “Because… someone decided to throw his cut on the ground, and go rogue”. She shot Angel a hard look out of the corner of her eye. “Go rogue… What are you talking about?”, Bishop said. There was a long moment of silence, before Angel looked around at his brothers with a nervous expression. “I was gonna cross the border, and find Palo. Take care of him myself”.

A murmur of curses and words like dumbass and suicidal shit-for-brains rose around the table. Coco smacked Angel over the back of the head. “You think we’d let you do that?”, Bishop growled. “Are you really that fucking stupid, that you think we’d let you walk straight into your own execution?”. “That’s why I wasn’t gonna let you know”, Angel said. “Well, someone must have known; how else did Nina find out?”, Gilly said. “He told me”, EZ said. Bishop seemed about to say some choice words to his prospect, before EZ stepped out from behind the bar, and cut him off. “I was gonna let you know, if it came down to it. I just thought Nina would be more likely to be able to talk him out of it, than any of us”. “That’s why you wanted to come to Charming with us, in stead of holding down the fort here”, Hank said. EZ nodded. Bishop slammed his fist into the table. “This is why blood can’t sponsor blood. If Angel was still your sponsor, you would have let him go through with it; because he’d make you stay silent”. “No, that was never an option”, EZ said.

Bishop sighed. “You just added three months to your year, prospect”, he said. Angel cleared his throat. “Technically, I wasn’t patched when I told EZ. So, he didn’t owe you the information”, he said. Nina was caught off guard at Angel’s sudden show of shrewdness. “Angel’s right, Bishop”, Taza said; always the mediator. Bishop clenched his jaw, and let out a deep breath. “One month. And my bike needs polishing”, he said. “First thing in the morning”, EZ said, and went back behind the bar. He and Angel shared a knowing and very brotherly look; which made Nina want to take a picture at the scene from the sheer sweetness of it.

Coco decided to get back to business. “Prez’, no offence, but even if we did decide to go through with your plan, we still don’t know who the snitch is”. “No, but we’d buy us some time to snuff her out”, Bishop said. “But if Nina isn’t going to back us in this, we’re fucked either way”. “You sure he won’t take money?”, Riz asked. “Palo doesn’t care about money”, Taza said. “All that matters to him is his pride and reputation. The fact that he can’t get revenge for his cousins killing, makes him look weak”. “So, let’s play on that”, Angel said. “Find something that will ruin his reputation, and threaten to use it against him, if he doesn’t back down”.

Bishop seemed to ponder Angel’s words for a moment. “It might work… But it would need to be bad”, he said. “Taza, you know him the best”. “Yeah, but I haven’t kept anything from you”, the VP said. “You know everything I know”. “What do you know, though?”, Coco said. He smirked to himself, when he seemed to realize that he’d just made a rhyme. “Other than the fact that he’s an absolute psycho”, Gilly added. “He’s been president of VM since 93”, Taza said. “No one’s had the guts to challenge him”. “They’re based out of TJ; and they deal in H and guns, like us”, Bishop said. Nina frowned for a second. She had always known about the Mayans’ heroin business, but didn’t like to be reminded of it. Back when she’d found out that SAMCRO was muling for them, she’d refused to speak with Jax for a month. Angel stroked her back, clearly feeling her tense up. “We can’t use that”, Creeper said. “Don’t we have something on his family? He’s going crazy over his cousin, maybe he’s got a niece with an std, or a brother with gambling debts…”. “Nah, carnal. He killed his brother, remember?”, Coco said.

Darkness ghosted Taza’s face for a second. “Yeah, he did…”, Bishop said. “Slit his throat back in the nineties, right VP?”. “Yeah…”, Taza said. “Were you there for that?”, Angel asked. “It wasn’t a good day”. Taza took a swig of his beer, and seemed deep in thought. “But Palo never hid that”, Hank said. “If anything, he just used it to add to his rep as a crazy motherfucker, you shouldn’t mess with”. All the Mayans sat in silence for a moment, but Nina’s eyes were trained at Taza, who looked pained. “Do we know why he did it? Does anyone?”, Gilly asked. “Palo is the only member of the Vatos from back then who’s still wearing the cut”, Bishop said. “Yeah, ‘cuz the rest of them are dead”, Hank said. “Taza’s not”, Riz said. All eyes were on the vice-president. “Taza?”, Bishop said. “Why did Palo kill Davíd?”.

Nina would have fallen off Angel’s lap, if his arm wasn’t around her. “You good, querida?”, he said, looking at her worriedly. “Yeah… I just need to go… powder my nose”, she muttered in reply, and got up to stand, heading towards the bathroom. “What’s wrong?”, Bishop asked. “She’s gotta piss”, Coco said. Nina decided against throwing any more shoes at the Mayan, and simply went into the small bathroom, and closed the door as best she could. Someone really needed to fix that door.

---

Nina sat down on the lid of the toilet, and tried to calm her breathing. She knew what being gay meant in most clubs – even SOA had been hetero-exclusive up until a few years ago, when Tig got together with Venus – so, she’d never for a second thought about talking to anyone about Taza’s relationship with a man. But now it turned out his lover had been Palo’s brother – the one he’d killed, no less – and Nina was quite sure she knew why he had in fact committed that murder. Having a gay brother, in the very catholic country of Mexico – while being the president of an MC – would be a devastating blow for Palo, if it became public. This truth could save Nina’s life; and at the same time, it could be the death of Taza, if the Mayans felt like Palo. Even if they didn’t share Palo’s convictions, Nina had no right to out the man in front of his brothers.

So, there she was. She could let a person die in her place, by following Bishop’s plan; or hurt Taza, if she chose to tell the Mayans what she knew; so that they could use it to blackmail Palo into standing down. Neither option was feasible, and both options made her want to throw up violently.

There was a knock at the door. “Nina? Are you ok?”, Angel asked. She quickly flushed, and ran the tap to make it seem like she was washing her hands. “Yeah. Uh huh… Just a sec”, she called out. She looked at herself in the mirror to check that she didn’t look too flustered; and then opened the door, smiling brightly at Angel. “You were in there a long time”, he said worriedly. “Do you wanna know what it smelled like?”, she asked, and pushed him out of her way, to go grab a cigarette from his packet on the table. Nina sat down on Angel’s chair, and when he came back to the table, she grinned at him, and patted her thighs; as if inviting him to sit down. Angel chuckled, and pulled another chair from a nearby table, to sit down next to her instead.

Apparently, the conversation about something to use as blackmail against Palo had continued while she was away. “So, we don’t know why Palo killed his brother; we don’t have any other dirt on him, that he’s not using to his own advantage already…”, Angel said. “… and we don’t know who our snitch is”. “And Palo wants an answer by tomorrow night”, Bishop added. Nina let her eyes meet Taza’s for a split second, and he simply smiled at her. He took a deep breath, and was about to speak, when Nina caught him to it. “We’ll go with Bishop’s plan”, she said, with her heart in her throat. Taza looked confusedly at her. “Nah, that’s too dangerous”, Angel said. “I’ll be fine. I trust you to keep me safe”, Nina said.

Bishop looked at her with hard eyes. “Are you sure about this, Nina?”, he asked. “I don’t like it; but, yes”, Nina replied. “Ok”, Bishop said. “Now we just have to find our snitch… Taza, call up Palo first thing tomorrow. Tell him we’ll give him Nina, and that we’ll work out the details of the handoff as soon as possible. That’ll buy us a few days. Someone’s gonna fuck up at some point; and one suspect has already been eliminated”. “And killed”, Angel growled; though there was a hint of satisfaction in his voice.

Everyone got to their feet, and Angel took Nina’s hand to kiss her knuckles. “I’m not gonna let you get hurt”, he promised, and she gave him a slight smile. Bishop called him over to share a few words, and Nina began gathering the empty beer bottles to recycle them. Going in to the back room to get a clean dishtowel – and to gather her thoughts – someone tapped her shoulder. She turned around and stood face to face with Taza. “Nina, I’m…”, he began. “I’m not telling anyone what you told me. That’s not my place”, Nina cut him off. Taza smiled warmly at her. “But telling the club was my decision to make”, he said. “I don’t want you to get hurt…”, Nina whispered. “I’m not just talking physically… You shouldn’t have to dig up that old wound, just for my sake”. The VP put his hand on her cheek, and shook his head defeatedly. “Kid, I’m…”.

“What is it with everyone putting their hands on my woman today?”, Angel laughed from the doorway. Taza took a step back, and held out his hands in defence. “Don’t ask me to join you in the cage. My arthritis is acting up”, he chuckled. Angel stepped over to Nina, and wrapped an arm around her. “Let’s go home, ma’”, he said. He nodded at Taza. “See you tomorrow”.

Angel led Nina out of the clubhouse, and towards the truck; when EZ came up behind them. “Hey. The garage”, he said. Angel groaned. “Man, I wanna go home… spend some time with my girl”, he said. “Just come on”, EZ said. They followed him over to the garage, and EZ pulled a tarp off something large; revealing Angel’s repaired bike. Angel ran a hand over his face, and looked at his brother. “Fuck, Ezekiel… You did this?”. “And Coco and Gilly”, EZ said. “We knew you’d be back”. Angel pulled his brother in for a tight hug. “I love you, hermano”, he muttered. “Love you too”, EZ smiled. Angel got two spare helmets from a rack, and handed one to Nina, before getting onto his bike. Nina climbed on behind him, and put her arms around his waist. Angel started up the engine, and Nina saw him grin in the mirror, at the sound of the roar.

As they drove off the lot, Nina let herself forget Palo, Davíd, and the fact that she’d probably just doomed someone to death. She was just there, seated behind her Angel; and letting herself become one with the road.

---

The house still smelled like detergent when Angel and Nina stepped inside. Angel closed the door behind them, and locked it securely; before taking off his cut. He held it up in front of him, and smiled softly. Nina was leaning against the worktable, and chewed her lip to keep from laughing. “Do you two want some privacy?”, she asked. Angel hung the cut over the back of a chair. “Shut up”, he said, stifling a grin.

They stood for a long time, just smiling at each other, before Angel finally spoke. “Take your clothes off”. Nina’s smile widened. “Excuse me? What’s the magic word”, she said. Angel walked towards her, as if on the prowl. “Take your fucking clothes off… please”. Nina stepped towards him, meeting him in the middle of the room. “Do it for me”, she said.

Angel let out a short laugh, before he grabbed her hands, and raised them in the air. Slowly, he pulled Nina’s top over her head, and then – after stroking his knuckles down between her breasts and over her belly – he undid the button on her shorts; and pulled them down her legs. His hands stroked the skin of her calves and thighs on his way up; and once he was standing again, he cupped her face, and placed a soft kiss to her lips. “I love you…”, he whispered. “I know”, Nina smiled. Angel pulled back, and frowned. “That’s not what you’re supposed to say”. “Thank you?”, Nina teased. Angel let out a groan, and slipped his arms around her; cupping her bottom. “Nina…”, he said. “I love you, Angel”. A grin spread across Angel’s face, and he kissed her again. Nina let herself melt against his chest; but before she knew what happened, he had picked her up, and thrown her over his shoulder. “Let’s go”, he said, and slapped her butt; before carrying her into the bedroom.

Nina giggled like a schoolgirl, as she was thrown onto the bed. Angel went to put his gun on the nightstand; then looked down at her for a few seconds, before shedding his t-shirt, and shrugging of his jeans with almost superhuman speed. She spread her legs to invite him in, and Angel laid down between her thighs; pressing his hardness against her warmth. “Oh, my…”, Nina gasped. The sensation was almost too intense to handle, after being apart for so long, and she locked her right leg around his hips, to keep him close. As they kissed – both obviously relishing in the taste of the other – Angel grinded against Nina; and the friction was enough to make Nina feel that familiar heat that always came before an orgasm, spread through her body. She dug her nails into Angel’s back, and whimpered against his lips. “Already?”, Angel chuckled. “I missed you…”, Nina breathed. “Missed this… oh god!”. Angel had thrusted hard against her, and caught her lips in another deep kiss.

Nina arched her back, and Angel opened her bra; quickly pulling it off her. One of his hands found her nipple, and he rolled the little bud between two fingers. Attacking her neck with kisses and nibbling at the sensitive skin here, he continued moving against her. Angels penis was rubbing against her labia, and the head was bumping against her clit perfectly. In spite of the barrier of their underwear, before long, Nina cried out, her climax washing over her like overwhelming waves. “Fuck, querida. Making you come is my favorite thing in the world”, Angel breathed. “I gotta be inside you”. He moved off her to shrug of his boxers, and Nina pulled at her panties; letting Angel take over the task of getting them off, once they were down by her knees.

As soon as he was back between her legs, Angel used his hand to guide his cock to her entrance, and pushed in to her. “Yes…”, Nina gasped. Angel grabbed her thigh, and made her lock her leg around his hips again. Nina threw her arms around his waist, and dug her fingers into his butt-cheeks, to try to push him deeper into her with every thrust. She clenched her muscles around Angel’s cock; willing him to never leave her warmth. Angel dug his fingers into Nina’s hair, and his free arm hooked under her knee; giving him the perfect angle to make her whimpers turn in to loud mewls. “Give me one more, mami”, Angel demanded; and at his words, Nina fell over the edge again. Angel used her orgasm to reach his own high point; and with a loud groan, he came inside her.

It wasn’t the longest session they’d ever had, and they were both much too tired for a round two; but as they lay there, looking into each other’s eyes, that didn’t matter. They were together again, and they’d have many more nights to get lost in each other. Angel pressed his lips against Nina’s, and turned them around, so that she was draped over his chest. She fell asleep with him still inside her.

---

tags: @cole-winchester @doloreschanal

[dragonologist-in-the-making]

It Was Always You

Pairing: James Potter x reader

Summary: James has always been in love with the reader, and decides that the incessant flirting with Lily Evans isn’t working, so he steps his jealousy game up a notch.

A/N: I’ve been gone for too long (sorry!!) but I loved writing this!! I need to work on the rest of the requests I have (sorry it’s taken so long, if anyone cares enough about excuses I have a whole wheelbarrow full). This is part of @wreckofawriter ‘s writing challenge! My trope was fake dating, but of course I couldn’t do it so cliched and had to have a little twist.

Wordcount: 2.9K

“I think this is the year.” James Potter grinned, walking into the Entrance Hall with all the other Hogwarts students. Next to him, Remus rolled his eyes, Sirius shook his head in disbelief and Peter smiled sympathetically. “It’s going to work this year, I just know it.”

“Prongs.” Sirius started, moving through the throngs of students all trying to get to the Great Hall for the welcome feast, arguably the best feast of the year. “You’ve also said that for the last five years, and nothing has happened.”

“No, this year is different. Clearly, flirting with Evans isn’t getting me anywhere with y/n, I just need a new plan. I don’t know if I can pretend to be in love with Lily for much longer.”

They walked into the Great Hall and over to the Gryffindor table, where a y/h/c girl was sat waiting for them, a bright smile on her face. “I saved you all seats.” She gestured to the four empty seats around her as all the boys sat down, James taking his seat next to her as he gave a pointed look to Sirius, as if saying I told you so. “Did you have a good summer? I’m sorry I couldn’t come and visit James, my parents would barely even let me in the garden because of the war.” She chewed on her lip guiltily, her eyes wide and looking at him, making him feel like he was melting into a puddle next to her.

Stuttering, he waved off her concerns quickly, returning her bright smile and trying to stop the blush from rising to his cheeks as he turned to the plates which were now full in front of him, helping himself to large portions of food. The rest of the meal continued, the five friends laughing loudly as if their two months of separation had never happened, sharing stories and inside jokes. Once they had finished eating, they made their way lazily back up to the common room, all slightly sluggish from the long journey and their newly full stomachs.

“I think I’m about to enter a food coma.” y/n laughed, rubbing her hand on her belly as if pregnant, causing a laugh from the boys. “I’m gonna head off to bed, I’ll see you tomorrow morning.” She waved goodbye, walking up the stairs to the girls dorm as the boys all sat on the sofa and chairs around the warm fire. Catching a glimpse of long red hair, James paused before he sat, uttering a quick excuse to his friends before he turned and walked across the room to where she was sat.

“I need a favour.” He said, catching her attention as she turned to look at him sympathetically and simultaneously irritably.

“You mean, me letting you flirt with me and follow me around for years in the hopes that you would get y/n’s attention isn’t enough?” She asked sarcastically, earning a guilty shrug from him as he sat in the seat next to her.

“It is, Lils, you’ve been actually the best to put up with me. I just, I need to do something a little more extreme, to see once and for all if she likes me.”

“James, you know I don’t like doing this to her, she’s my friend too and I don’t like playing with her feelings.”

“I promise this is it.” He felt his heart sink as he made the promise, to Lily and to himself, hoping that he would never have to face the consequences he was laying out. “Please, Lily, just pretend to date me for a few weeks, a month tops, and if nothing changes then I’ll accept that it’s over, and I’ll drop it.” He looked at her pleadingly, and after a deafening silence she finally nodded. He puffed out a breath of hot air, relief and hope washing over him, as he jumped up and pulled Lily into a hug, squeezing her tightly. “Thank you. For everything. You’re the best.”

“Don’t make me regret it!” She called after him as he walked back to the other Marauders, already lost in his own world of what could happen by the end of this month.

…

Y/n was walking with Remus from ancient runes to defence against the dark arts, discussing plans for the first Hogsmead trip of the year, the first time they could (officially) leave the castle since arriving on September first. She stopped in her tracks at the sight of James next to Lily. It wasn’t uncommon, he had been following after her for years, giving y/n much ammo to tease him with, but what stopped her in her tracks was that instead of Lily’s usual hard exterior, deflecting his compliments and his cheesy lines, she was laughing back at him, with this stupid, stupid grin, and was twirling her hair around her finger.

Remus stopped next to her, confused for a second until he looked up and saw what she had noticed. “Ah.”

“James and Lily? They’re… together?” She asked, her voice a little smaller than usual, slightly more shielded.

“They saw each other a lot over the summer, and I… guess she finally saw enough of him to give him a chance.” Remus explained uncomfortably. He, too (like everyone but James), had been against the idea, not wanting to play with feelings, warning that it was more trouble than was necessary. But, stubborn as he was, he wouldn’t give it up, and so here Remus was, lying to one of his best friends, for one of his other best friends.

Her face fell for a second, shadows flickering across too quickly for Remus to pick out exactly what they were. Jealousy? Hurt? Before he had time to decipher what he was seeing, she shrugged lightly, her shoulders lifting in a graceful movement. “Well, good, I’m glad she’s seen the real him. He deserves to be happy, he’s waited long enough for her.”

She couldn’t help the true, genuine smile that rose on her face at seeing the boy she loved so happy, his head thrown back as he laughed, his messy hair falling into his eyes as he brought his head up again, even as she felt the blade slice through her heart as she watched his hand reach for hers, a simple gesture tearing her apart so easily.

Remus seemed to accept her statement, and they finished their journey to class together, where y/n struggled to concentrate. James Potter finally had Lily Evans, so where did that leave her? She supposed, as she doodled little flowers on the edges of her parchment, that it was time to listen to her aching heart and try to move on.

…

It was hard for y/n to adjust to life with James having a girlfriend. As hard as it was for her to see, and it never did seem to hurt less, she cared so much for both James and Lily that she wanted them to be happy with each other. She had stepped back slightly from James’ life, not wanting their closeness to become an issue in his relationship, meaning that she constantly had to remind herself that the seat next to him was no longer for her, she couldn’t borrow his jumpers anymore (she had taken to stealing Remus’ in their absence, much to his own amusement), and she couldn’t hide in a dark corner of the castle with him whenever she needed a break from the rest of the world, and a comfort only someone who had known her as long as he had could provide.

She had forgotten, for a brief moment, after the Quidditch game earlier that day. Gryffindor had pulled through spectacularly in the first game of the school year, in large part due to James’ skills, and she had run onto the pitch to congratulate him like always, only to stop when she saw Lily get there first. She had waited until Sirius was next to her to go and congratulate James, trying not to notice how the exercise always sharpened his hazel eyes and how the wind always left his hair tangled.

It was exactly that, which had lead to the situation she was in now. She was sat in the common room, her fourth firewhisky in her hand, trying to let herself forget James for just one night. He looked distractingly beautiful in a simple t-shirt and jeans, and he was in the centre of the party, Lily hooked firmly to his side. He had caught her eye when y/n had walked down from her dorm, and smiled and waved, which had promptly caused her to hide in a corner nursing a bottle, hoping she could be left alone.

“Well aren’t you a depressing scene.” She looked up at the voice to see Sirius, who seemed flushed from alcohol too, smiling down at her as he leaned over the arm of the chair she was sunk in.

“Sirius, you get with a lot of girls, right?” She asked, a sudden inspiration and courage coursing through her from the liquid courage in her veins. He nodded, not drunk enough to not be wary about where she was going as he indicated to continue. “Well, do you ever get attached? Like, is it easy to just let go and move on? Do you even need to move on?” She could feel herself rambling, but couldn’t stop, and found she needed an answer from him more than she had known.

“No, most of the time it’s only a one-time thing, and I know that going in, so I don’t get attached. It’s different when you’ve been in love with someone for years.” He looked at her knowingly, and she glared back defensively.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She huffed, averting her eyes and scanning the crowds of the party, people dancing and having a good time. “I’m not in love with James.”

“Who mentioned James?” Sirius grinned as she groaned, realising that he had caught her.

“It’s nothing. I’m getting over it. Trying, anyway.” She sighed, finishing the rest of her bottle and casting it aside. Feeling hurt and desperate to stop the feeling, she looked at Sirius. “And I think I know where to start.”

She surged forward, pressing her lips to his, trying to ignore the rest of the party and focus on the feeling of his lips against hers. His lips, which weren’t moving. His hands, which had moved to her shoulders and which were gently pushing her away. He was sat next to her, and as she looked at him guilt flooded through her at what she had done.

“I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have kissed you without asking.” Her hand flew to her mouth as she felt the shock begin to sober her up.

“No, y/n, it’s okay. It’s just, this won’t change your feelings, it’ll only make you feel worse.” She nodded, accepting his words and feeling even more despair at how far she had fallen for the boy. Sirius noticed and pulled her closer, tucking her under his arm as she took his half-empty bottle from his hands and drinking from it, managing to laugh at a joke he told her.

They both turned as they heard glass shatter behind them, and saw James standing there, hand still clenched as if he was holding a bottle in his hand, although it had clearly shattered in his grip. Sirius jumped away from y/n, holding his hands up and turning to face James.

“It’s not what you think.” He started, speaking low and trying not to gain the attention of the other Gryffindors, most of whom had assumed someone had just drunkenly dropped a bottle.

“I think you were flirting with y/n!” he shouted back, his words barely slurred, clearly more sober than the two of them. She had begun to stand up, although she wasn’t sure what her input in this conversation would be. After all, even though she hadn’t been flirting with Sirius, that was her choice to make.

“She was telling me how she’s trying to get over you!” He shouted back, clearly exasperated at the situation, laughing humourlessly.

“You – she – she’s what?” James sputtered, his eyes widening as he processed his best friend’s words. “You what?” He asked, turning to face y/n, who was equally shocked that Sirius would treat her feelings so carelessly.

“Nope.” She muttered, not ready to have this conversation, not when she was drunk, not in the common room, maybe not ever. Before anyone could stop her she was through the portrait hole and running through the corridors, not caring if she was caught, slightly hoping she would be so that at least no one could find her.

She slowed down, ducking behind a tapestry into a hidden corridor, welcoming the peace and quiet of the castle at night. She led on the floor, grateful for the stone cooling down her hot skin, closing her eyes and trying to pretend the whole night had never happened.

A few pairs of footsteps walked past her hiding spot, and each time she would tense up, not relaxing until they had passed her again and she was left in silence. She jumped, then, when a voice came out of the dark from the long corridor behind her.

“I know you can sleep anywhere, but I never thought you would try the actual floor of the castle.” After the small shriek that had left her lips at his unexpected appearance, she opened her eyes to see him standing over her, smiling nervously, one hand in his pocket and the other extended to pull her into a sitting position.

“Merlin, James. How did you find me?” She asked, and he gave her a pointed look once he had settled next to her, both of their backs against the wall of the corridor. “I’m going to burn that map one day.”

“No you won’t, you’re too impressed at how well the magic works.” He grinned at her, widening slightly when she couldn’t argue with his point. “So, I spoke to Sirius.” He offered, and y/n curled into herself as he brought up the one thing she was hoping he wouldn’t, but knew that he was going to.

“I’m sorry. I just thought, you and Lily seem to be happy, you know, and I want to be happy for you, so I’m trying to move on. But, I understand if you don’t want to be friends anymore, if it makes you too uncomfortable to be around me.”

“We’re not.” He blurted out, and y/n looked at him in confusion. “Lily and I, we’re not together.”

She gasped into the silence, too consumed by her own thoughts to notice that he didn’t look at all bothered by this fact. “Oh James, are you okay? I know how long you’ve liked her, I’m so sorry it didn’t work out the way you wanted.” Despite everything, she reached for his hand, giving it a short squeeze in comfort. As she went to let go, he held on tighter, and she looked at him in confusion.

“I never actually liked her.” He confessed, blushing slightly as she only became more confused. “I actually, um, like, love, you. It was always you. But I was scared, and I thought that if I paid attention to Lily, I might be able to see if you liked me too. But I could never tell, so we pretended to date, but you seemed to support that too, which was confusing. But Sirius told me what you said, he said that you love me. And, I knew I had to come and find you.”

Her head was spinning as she tried to wrap her head around what he was telling her, her hand holding his even tighter than before. She looked at him, the hopeful look in his eyes, the way his cheeks were flushed from a mixture of the alcohol and their situation. He leaned in closer, looking into her eyes. “Can I kiss you?” Unable to speak, she nodded, and for the second time that night her lips connected with another.

Whereas the first kiss made her feel nothing, this was the polar opposite. As the realisation of what was happening caught up to her, she felt the elation soar through her, making her light-headed with giddiness. Her hands wound their way behind his neck and into his hair, as his circled around her waist and pulled her closer into him. She gasped as his teeth caught on her lip, and he kissed her harder, more forcefully than she had expected, pushing her backwards. James reacted quick enough to put his arm out and break her fall, making sure her back didn’t hit the hard floor too roughly. She looked up at him leaning over her, pupils blown, lips swollen, looking wild, and she swallowed.

“Should we head back to the party?” she asked, her voice quiet.

“No way. I only just got you, I don’t think I’m ready to share you just yet.”

“Oh thank god.” She replied, pulling him back down to her by the shirt to her, not willing to waste one more second without James Potter by her side.

[fandomsilhouette]

the presents they measured (the presence she treasured)

Love is a powerful motivator. Jealous is even more so. Suddenly, someone finds themselves falling faster than they knew how to breathe, before they knew they were even walking to the edge of a cliff, too quickly to enjoy the scenery on the walk over, and all they know is that by the time they crash-land, they’d better be ready to fight. Someone pushed them over the edge. It’s time for revenge.  Happy @felinettenovember​, y’all! Yes, we are in fact back to happy times. This has been written in collaboration with @musicfren​, who will be posting the second part on his account tomorrow. It continues to be fluffy fluff, don’t worry... for now >:3 We’ll be doing every weekend pair together, so follow him if you don’t already or you’ll be missing a whole chapter!!! 

Part 1 below. Part 2 upcoming. 

“...did I miss Marinette’s birthday?” 

“Dude, what are you talking about? Mari’s birthday is in April.” Nino shoots a pointed look at the snow drifting down to the streets as he shakes the now-sludgy water off his snow boots and starts unwrapping himself out of his winter gear, piling them up in a wet mess on Felix’s desk. Felix, for once, chooses not to complain, opting instead to focus on the main issue here. 

“Well, but there’s a gift on her desk and November seventh is definitely too early for holiday gifts.” Felix smirks slyly at a camera no one else can see as he said the date, making Nino send him a weird look. Then again, Felix was weird all the time. Nino is used to it by now, so he doesn’t comment any further. 

Nino shoots him a sidelong glance. “Dude, why are you specifically checking her desk?”

“Unimportant, I saw it as I walked in. Do you know who put it there?” Felix says, swerving the discussion violently back to the most salient point. 

“…bruh… her desk requires you to turn almost 180˚ from where you would need to go for your desk.” 

“Unimportant, I said.” Hopefully his Ladybug-red blush doesn’t show under the still-flickering half on lights that no one has bothered to flick the other switch for. The back half of the classroom is bathed in residual light and Felix can hardly see his own hand in front of him, but by Nino’s amused smirk, his blush is clearly bright enough to light up the path to his doom. 

Nino opens his mouth, but whatever snark he was going to respond with is lost under a quiet “ooooooh!” and the sound of wrapping paper being carefully pried apart. Felix turns and his meticulously coiffed composure slips a bit. 

“Marinette!” He half-falls out of his chair as he scampers anxiously to her side. He stands protectively behind her as if about to pull her to safety, hands hovering awkwardly around her waist, but she seems far too engrossed by the present before her to notice. Later, Felix will blush and be glad she didn’t. Later than that, she’ll admit she saw and just chose to ignore it, and Felix will blush again. 

“I wonder what it i-- ooh!!” With a small happy gasp, she pulls back the paper (a disgustingly garish shade of green, easily three shades off of the correct shade, obviously) to reveal a dainty box of chocolates and an elegant white card, ornately decorated in gold leaf print. Marinette curiously picks up the card as Felix cranes his head intently over her shoulder. Inside, in pretentiously penciled cursive, is a simple phrase:

“With love, your secret admirer <3”

Felix immediately scoffs, grabbing Marinette’s wrist and pulling her into his chest, but she scarcely pays him any mind, so engrossed is she in her gift.

“Gosh, that’s really thoughtful of them, picking my favorite!  Who… whoever they are…”

“It’s not even your favorite kind of chocolate!” Felix screams in his head, and refuses to acknowledge the follow-up question of whether he even knows what her favorite chocolate is. He’s quickly distracted, anyways, when Marinette giggles, which is a very distracting sound, Nino, stop looking at him like that!

“Haha, I could even say it’s… sweet! of them!!” She pops a chocolate in her mouth and Felix is riveted to the way her lips purse around the sweet, the way her tongue swirls around her finger as she sucks the last of it off. 

Nino shoots him an impressed glance and mouths, “Dude, nice!” but Felix’s mind is too busy spinning to process why. What on EARTH was happening?! 

It takes him the next two classes and most of lunch to work up the courage to ask. “Um… what’s a secret admirer?” 

Nino pauses mid-bite, fork dangling in the air, to give Felix such a dumbfounded look that Felix immediately chooses to google the term instead, furtively hiding his phone under the bench. “Dude… why did you use that word if you didn’t even know what it meant, you walnut??” 

Felix slams the lid down on his food and walks away immediately, footsteps echoing to the sound of Nino’s laughter. 

He hopes to put this baffling incident behind him, but to Felix’s immense distress, the parade of gifts does not stop there. At her locker the next morning, Felix finds himself needing to push through a group of students all cooing over… something he cannot make out from behind the crowd. As he gets closer, he notices flowers pinned up in the shape of a heart over her locker, with a grand bouquet of roses pinned in the center. Felix’s nose twitches, itches, and then-- 

“Achoo!!”

Rose petals go flying everywhere and Marinette laughs, delighted. Kim nudges into him. “Sick show, bro! She loved that, how’d you time that sneeze??” 

Felix doesn’t know. He’s confused. He wants to go home.

Two days after that, the PA system crackles through the classroom five minutes before the class  is scheduled to end. Principal Damoclese clears his throat with a sharp peak in the audio and says in his most bored, reading-off-a-paper voice: “Marinette Dupain-Cheng to the courtyard, please, that’s Marinette Dupain-Cheng to the courtyard.” Bustier winks and ends class early, and everyone floods outside to see a teddy bear holding a cute little love-heart. Marinette makes a beeline to it and hugs it immediately, burying her face in its fur. It’s adorable, actually, and Felix tries very hard to not be jealous of a stuffed toy. 

He does not succeed. 

“OHMIGOSH, Felix!!!” Rose squeals, “That was so romantiiiiic, you’re sooooooo good at this!!! How are you being this sweeeeeeet??? <3 <3 <3” Felix can hear the hearts in her voice. Juleka mumbles something that he can only assume is agreement. Felix just sits down where he was standing and puts his head in his hands. Why did nothing make sense?

Felix leans his head against the window of the car, letting the bumps in the road thunk his forehead against the glass in a nice, soothing, repetitive dull pain, better than the constant headache he’s been living with for the last week. Their words spin about his head, hounding his thoughts. His chauffeur is silent for once

“Dude, nice!” “Sick show, bro!” “How are you being this sweet???”

And that’s when it hits him, making a hollow thunk off his empty skull.

Someone is getting her these gifts. And they think he did it. 

Another heartbeat. 

OH NO, THEY KNOW HE LIKES HER! Wait. He likes her?! ...oh no. He DOES. 

Staring out at the road speeding by far too fast, Felix clenches his hands into fists. He’d never expected to find himself here: head over heels crushing on a girl that everyone knew he liked before he ever worked it out on his own, a week late into a competition he doesn’t remember entering. 

Well, no matter. There’s still time to enter, catch up, win.

The next day, Marinette finds another chocolate box on her desk, bigger, more expensive, and exactly the correct shade of green. Each one is handcrafted into increasingly more elaborate designs, laced with caramel and toffee and candied pecans. The spread takes over her desk and Alya’s, and Felix grins smugly. 

“Wait. Didn’t you already do this?” Nino asks, but Felix is too busy. There is an entire wheelbarrow of flowers to deliver by lunch. 

His competition moves quickly: by the end of the school day, the PA is playing a serenade for her in front of the whole school. As soon as the bell rings, he cancels his next order and places a rush on the biggest size they offer: clearly, he’s going to need to do better. He doesn’t bother to look at the sizing or the price. Nothing is too big or too expensive for Marinette. 

The next day Marinette finds a third box, so big it doesn’t even fit on her desk and instead sits next to it like an awkwardly crouched gremlin. Felix glowers at it, not having realized exactly how big it was going to be, and becoming increasingly concerned as she shrieks with delight, yanking out the artistically crinkled tissue paper and tossing it gleefully behind her, climbing into the giant box as soon as she makes enough space for herself. 

Terrified, Felix shuffles over and peeks over the edge. She’s curled up in the paws of his giant stuffed animal, half asleep, looking so cozy he can hardly bear it. 

...oh, goodness, he’s getting jealous of a toy again. His own toy, even!  

There’s nothing for a few days, and Felix relaxes, and then--

The entire classroom is covered in flowers of every kind come Thursday morning. Bustier cancels the first period and directs everyone coughing and sneezing to the nurse, and convinces everyone who can stand the pollen to help her move it out of the way. 

It turns out the class has been talking about the secret admirers-- a lot more than Felix expected. Sometime after the impromptu courtyard concert by Jagged Stone and the last minute fashion walk between classes, and between the endless planning and scheming and glowering, Felix finds himself cornered by Nino, who’s lost his hat, glasses hanging half off his face in a way Felix could’ve sworn they didn’t used to bend, looking more feral than Felix had ever seen him. 

“ENOUGH, FELIX.” And then Felix finds himself being dragged bodily to an empty classroom where at last he faces his opponent-- nay, his nemesis. He recognizes them at once, because of the way they, too, are being held prisoner, the only other put together person in the entire room. 

Oh, he really should’ve known. 

[thefatedthoughtofyou]

Dirty Deeds (Done Dirt Cheap) - Part 15

Summary: Sam inherits Steve Roger's crime empire after a handful of his men betray and kill him. The rest of the crime world, sensing an opening, go after Sam and the territories he's inherited from Steve. Thankfully, Steve left him a number, someone to call if he ever needs help. Someone, Steve claimed, he can trust. But can Sam really trust a mercenary with that much blood on his name? And that many knives in his pockets.

WARNINGS: (there will eventually be all of these things) blood, violence, murder, shooting, stabbing, sex, blood play , food related things: malnutrition, feeding, blow jobs, bathing/washing, chronic pain. Limb loss and regrowth. Bullet wounds. Gore.

18+ Content: Make Good Choices Kids <3

Ao3

He's waiting in bar again. Torres at his side. Helen and Maria by the door, guns drawn. Sam wasn't sure exactly what Bucky had meant by company, but he wanted to be ready. He'd woken everyone, and called a few people in. Everyone was dressed, looking slightly sleep ruffed, but alert. Sam's hand was beginning to sweat on the butt of his gun when he heard a shout down the hall, and then footsteps running toward the door. The man annouced himself before coming into the doorway.

"It's Barnes. And his...friend?" The man said, disappearing again. Sam sighed, shoving his gun back in its holster under his arm, and leaning against the bar. His elbows knocking against the wood there painfully. He heard Torres let out a breath next to him and glanced at him. Torres nodded, his gun still in his hand, but he was relaxed. Sam's eyes went to the door as he heard the front doors open and then slam closed, he heard them slide the security locks shut a second later.

Sam's heart was pounding as he listened to the sound of slow steps coming down the hall. It sounded like someone was dragging their foot as they walked, and there was a strange squeaking noise as well. He blinked slowly, trying to calm his breathing as he waited to see what fresh hell Barnes was bringing to him now.

He nearly chocked when saw the man cross the threshold, being wheeled in in a... was that a fucking wheelbarrow? Sam narrowed his eyes and noticed the man was missing a foot. His eyes moved over him, noting the uncomfortably small appendage growing out of his shoulder. Sam's stomach turned at the sight, he walked out from behind the bar, ready to confront Barnes about what exactly was happening, when his eyes fell on the man. Sam swallowed and stepped closer, Bucky was pale, more so than usual, and he was bleeding again, Sam could see blood dripping down his hand onto the floor. He'd stopped pushing the wheelbarrow and was swaying in place now, blinking slowly a few times before sqeezing his eyes shut and then blinking rapidly. Sam took another step closer.

"Wade, Sam. Sam, Wade." Bucky muttered, not moving, his voice flat. Sam nodded, his eyes moving to Wade briefly before going back to Bucky.

"Ho. Ly. Fuck nuts. Talk about a face you could sit on. Look at those fucking cheekbo- mmph!" Wade cut off as Bucky clamped his hand over his mouth, the eyes on his mask going wide. Sam watched Bucky look down slowly, Wade looked up at him. Bucky furrowed his brow and shook his head, once, Wade looked up at him for a long moment before nodding. Bucky removed his hand, quickly moving it back to the handle of wheelbarrow, he looked like he was barley able to keep himself on his feet. Sam took yet another step toward him. Bucky's eyes jumped to him, clearing suddenly, icy blues locking onto him.

"Lock everything down. I told the guys at the door already. But everyone else needs to check and double everything, the doors, the windows the-" he cut off, swaying again, blinking rapidly, shaking his head like he was trying to clear it.

"The panic room. You need to... to be there." His voice trailed off, his eyes drooping, as Sam watched him sway backwards and then straighten himself up again. Sam took one more slow step.

"You- you're not... safe. Fuck." He breathed out the curse as his knees buckled. Sam tried to catch him, taking two large steps and grabbing his shirt, slowing the fall at least. Sam grimaced when he heard Bucky's knees his the floor, hard.

"Shit. Bucky! Whoa!" Wade said, sounding worried, reaching out from where he was stuck, and then grabbing the sides of the wheelbarrow, not able to get to Bucky without toppling over.

"I got him." Sam assured him, moving his arms under Bucky's, and rolling him onto his back. Helen was at his side in seconds, Sam didn't even hear her rush over. He watched her check his pulse and sigh.

"He needs blood. Can you carry him?" She asked, looking up at Sam. He looked down at Bucky, the blood on his hand bright in contrast with his pale skin.

"I think so." He said. Helen nodded and helped Sam pull him off the floor. Sam grunted as he managed to get Bucky draped over his shoulder, he was a lot heavier than he looked. Sam began following her out the door.

"Hey don't just leave me here! Somebody carry me too!" Wade's voice said behind Sam.

"Torres, help him." Sam said, not looking back, he could feel blood hitting the back of his legs, Bucky's shoulder dripping on him, as he carried the man up the stairs.

Helen opened the door to one of the spare rooms and cleared the bed, tossing throw pillows onto the floor and helping Sam lay Bucky on it.

"You need to get to the panic room. I can take care of this." She said, looking at Sam with bright eyes.

"Is he gonna be okay?" Sam asked, doing his best not wipe his bloody hands on his thighs. She looked at Bucky, and sighed again.

"He'll be fine. He always is." She frowned and looked back to Sam.

"No go. Take Torres with you. Once he's done helping Wade." She patted his arm, and walked out of the room. Torres stumbled in a few moments later, Wade's good arm drapped over his shoulder as he hopped next to him.

"I can see you trying not to laugh you know!" Wade said, poking at Torres with a finger on his too small arm. Torres snorted and helped lower Wade into the chair in the corner of the room.

"Sorry." Torres said, stepping away from him.

Wade shrugged, looking up at him, giving him a thumbs up for the help.

"Eey, it's okay. It's pretty fucked up. Oh goddamn it!" Wade sighed, dropping his head back.

"What?" Sam and Torres asked, in unison, Wade looked at them, the white eyes on his mask going wide again.

"Well that was adorable. Um no, I.... left my foot downstairs." He sighed, moving his palms slowly over his thighs.

"If you could have someone just pop that in the freezer.... I will... deal with that later." Wade said, and Sam could hear the akward smile on his face.

"That's disgusting." Torres breathed, but Sam could see him almost smiling.

"Go...do that. And then meet me in the panic room." Sam said, Torres nodded and walked back out the door. Helen walked back in as he disappeared from view.

"Still here." She admonished, frowning at him before getting to work on Bucky, Sam watched her begin to cut his shirt off and moved his attention back to Wade.

"Do you need anything?" He asked. Sam watched Wade pat at himself dramatically, humming to himself, before looking at Sam with wide eyes.

"Nope! I'm good! You go. I'll stay and harass the doc as she works." Sam looked at Helen, saw her smile as she worked and looked back to Wade again.

"If you need anything just ask. I'll let them know to get it for you." Sam said, stepping toward the door, he paused, narrowing his eyes at Wade. He'd heard all sorts of... odd, things about him.

"Within reason." He says, pointing at Wade. Wade cocked his head to the side.

"Oh you're fun. I like you." He said, before nodding and shooing Sam away. Sam let his eyes fall to Bucky, his shirt and pants now gone, his socks and boots in a small pile on the floor, his arm and leg both covered in blood again. Helen was pushing a needle into his arm, the blood he desperately needed hanging from the headboard on a makeshift IV set up. Sam pulled his eyes away and walked out the door.

~

"Who's after you now?" Torres asked, closing the heavy door on the panic room with a grunt. It was a nice room, larger than most panic rooms, Sam would guess, he'd never been in one. There was a couch shoved into the corner, and a small refrigerator full of water in the one opposite. The wall across from the couch was covered in screens, one for each camera in the house. Sam leaned agaisnt the wall and rubbed at his eyes.

"I don't know. He didn't say." Sam sighed, pressing the palms of his hands into his eyes hard before dropping them at his sides. He was so fucking tired. He just wanted to sleep. Maybe run away. Go somewhere no one would ever find him and just let the other families have what they fucking wanted. But he couldn't do that. He didn't want to do that. Not really. It was all just too much.

"He'll be okay right?" Torres asks, his voice quiet. Sam looks at him, he looks worried, his lip pulled between his teeth.

"Helen said he'd be fine." Sam reassured him. Torres nodded, his eyes moving to the wall of screens, Sam moved his eyes too, watching as his people moved through the house, locking it down.

"Feels weird. Being in here when they're all out there." Torres said.

"I don't like it either." Sam said, walking over to the couch and throwing himself onto it with a sigh.

"You should get some rest sir."

"Torres." Sam said, his tone a warning.

"Sorry. Sam. But you should. While you can." He said, Sam looked at him.

"Come sit down kid. You should rest too. The couch is plenty big enough." Sam said, laying his head back, letting his eyes fall closed as he felt Torres sit down at the other end.

"It is kind of a freakishly long couch isn't it?" Torres asked after a moment, Sam rolled his head to the side, seeing Torres moving his hand over the cushion next to him, wiggling in his seat to get comfortable. Sam snorted, and then full on laughed, his exhaustion catching up to him. Torres was quiet for a moment and then they were both laughing, Sam wiping at his face as his eyes watered. He heard Torres hiccup as they both calmed, and smiled as they settled into comfortable silence, watching the screens on the wall.

~

Sam couldn't take it. It had been almost eight hours. He'd slept off and on, but nothing substantial, always jerking awake when he was finally falling deeper. Torres had been sound asleep for almost an hour now. Sam watched him for a moment, his chest rising and falling slowly, and then pushed himself off the couch. He was careful not to wake the kid, stepping towards the door slowly. He punched in the code, pushed the door open slowly, just enough for him to slip out, and headed back up stairs.

He ran into Helen and Maria, both of them sitting outside the bar, Helen's head resting on Maria's shoulder.

"You're not-"

"Supposed to be out here. I know I know." Sam said, waving his hand and smiling at them. He stopped a few steps up the stairs and looked down at them.

"How is he?" He asked, trying to keep his voice even. His thoughts over the last eight hours had been full of blood and pale skin.

"He's okay. His heartrate's back to normal. And he's healing." Helen said, breathing deeply, Sam could see her fighting a yawn.

"Thank you." He said, nodding and moving up the stairs. He stays in the doorway, leans against the frame, doesn't go fulling into the room. Wade is slumped in the chair in the corner, both his arm and foot seem to have grown back, he says nothing as Sam stands there, so he assumes he's asleep. It's hard to tell with the mask, though it's been pulled up off his mouth, like he'd been talking to someone.

Bucky is on the bed, still unconscious. His flesh hand is resting on his stomach, drawing Sam's attention to just how skinny he is. There's muscle there, sure, but Sam can see his ribs more clearly than he should be able to. And his stomach, under his hand, is sunken in ever so slightly. Sam blinks, not looking away, and idly wonders how often he eats. Not enough, would be Sam's guess.

He moves his eyes, to Bucky's leg, the skin there is red, and Sam can see bruises clearly left by someone's fingers. He furrows his brow and sighs, moving his eyes up to Bucky's face, crossing his arms over his chest as he stares. He looks peaceful, not at all like the smartass Sam knows is lurking just beneath the surface. Sam's heart skips a beat when Bucky's brow furrows, he groans, his fingers pressing into his stomach as he moves and then settles again.

Sam takes a deep breath. His heart fluttering in chest as he finally looks away. He notices too late that the mouth under Wade's mask is smiling.

He nearly jerks to attention but schools himself and stays still, moving his eyes fully to Wade. He has his phone in his hand agaisnt his thigh, but he's smiling at Sam.

"Hey." Sam says awkwardly, not really sure what else to say. He knows he's been caught, but he's not going to admit it. Wade smiles and nods at him.

"Hey yourself." He says, tilting his head to the side.

"So you're a Wilson too huh?" Wade asks, looking at him. Sam isn't sure he likes the mask, he can't tell what this guy is thinking, or aiming for, he clears his throat and nods, deciding that's probably the point of the mask.

"Maybe he's collecting us." Wade says, joking, that much Sam can tell.

"What?" Sam asks, his fingers digging into his arm as he looks to Bucky, he's still asleep.

"Relax. I'm just fuckin with ya." Wade says, moving his eyes to his phone. He scratches at his chin and sighs. Sam watches him look at Bucky, sees his shoulders slump, and watches him stand.

"Listen, I gotta go. I have... something I gotta do. Just tell him it's about my F-word, he'll understand." Wade says, walking to the bed, he leans down and presses his lips to Bucky's forhead gently, soothing over the spot with his thumb afterwards, his fingers lingering in Bucky's hair. Sam's heart picks up in his chest, he knows he should look away, that it's not polite to watch an intimate moment, but his eyes don't move. He watches Bucky sigh, his lips moving into the smallest smile before he settles again. And then Wade is next to him, following his gaze to Bucky.

"Little bastard gets under your skin doesn't he?" Wade says, like he's sharing a secret. Sam snaps his head around to look at Wade, his skin feeling hot as the man looks, he thinks, at him.

"I don't know what you mean." Sam says, and he really wants to believe it. Wade laughs then, and steps through the door, patting Sam's shoulder as he goes.

"You will." He says, smiling at Sam one last time before pulling his mask down over his mouth. Sam watches him as he walks down the stairs. Watches him give a sarcastic salute to the men at the doors as they open them for him. And then he watches them lock them back up again, effectively trapping everyone inside. Sam sighs, rubs at his shoulder where Wade had touched him, and then turns back to Bucky. He's still sleeping. Still calm. And still slightly covered in blood.

He watches him sleep for another moment and then goes back down stairs. He sighs and walks back to the panic room. He glares at the door, hating it, and slides through. Torres is still alseep on the couch, small snores now echoing through the small room. Sam pulls the door shut, punches in the code, and smiles when Torres startles awake with flail.

~

He's in the kitchen, it's nearly midnight. He slowly places a thick slice of ham onto the sandwich he's crafting. He hears someone take a sharp breath in the hall outside and turns just in time to see Bucky slowly push the kitchen swinging door open. He pauses when he sees Sam, for the briefest moment, if Sam hadn't been looking at him he'd have missed it, and then makes his way to fridge. Sam watches him open it, grab a bottle of water, and close it again. He glances at Sam before shuffling over to the island, wiggling carefully onto one of the stools there.

Sam watches him take a long drink of water, his eyes moving away from Bucky's thoat and noticing the clothes he's wearing. He'd noticed the baggy sweat pants when he'd walked in, but now Sam's eyes were glued to the shirt that was much too big for him. Sam's shirt.

"Is that my shirt?" Sam asked, trying not to sound as breathless as he felt, and ending up sounding angery. Bucky widened his eyes and looked down at himself. He moved his eyes slowly back to Sam, and Sam still couldn't tell what he was thinking, and shrugged.

"Dunno. Helen brought it to me." He said, his voice quiet as he tugged at the front of the baggy shirt, looking down at it again. Sam nodded and didn't say anything else. He laid a slice of turkey over the ham on his bread, carefully arranging it. He could feel Bucky's eyes on him.

"Shouldn't you be in bed?" He asks, knowing he sounds annoyed.

"Shouldn't you be in the panic room? Like I told you?" Bucky bites back, Sam snaps his head up to look at him and finds Bucky staring down at the bottle in his hands, the sleeves of Sam's shirt so long they cover his knuckles. Sam hums and says nothing.

"You're not a very good listener, are you Sam?" Bucky asks, Sam glances at him, sees Bucky smiling at his water bottle and ignores him. He peels two slices of cheese away from the little stack and places them just so.

"I'm just trying to keep you safe. It's not- it's not a punishment." Bucky says, stammering over his words a bit before sighing. Sam looks at him and sees his brow is furrowed, he still isn't looking at Sam, his thumb picking at the lable of the bottle in his hands.

"I've been in there all day. I just needed a break. And something to eat that isn't stale beef jerky." Sam says, sighing, not sure why he's explaining himself. Bucky looks at him then, the wrinkle in his brow fading a bit before he nods, once. Sam watches his eyes drop to his plate, and then watches him swallow and lick his lips before looking away again.

Sam frowns down at his sandwich as he places the top slice. His fingers itch, he flexes them at his side and then grabs the knife he'd used for the mayo. He places his palm on the sandwich and cuts it neatly down the middle. He leans back, grabs another plate from the cabinet behind him and places half the sandwich on it. He slides it across the island slowly, until it's sitting in front of Bucky. He almost laughs at the look on Bucky's face. His eyes wide and child like as he looks from the sandwich to Sam.

"Go on. You should eat something." Sam says, shoving his own sandwich into his mouth to take a bite. Hoping he wouldn't say anything stupid if his mouth was full of food.

He watches Bucky pick up his half slowly. He closes his eyes as he takes a large bite, Sam hears him hum as he sets the sandwhich down, wiping at his mouth with his hand as he chews, nodding, his eyes still closed. Sam smiles and quickly takes another bite. Bucky's sandwich is gone before Sam is done with half of his. He feels a pressure under his ribs and pushes it away as he watches Bucky hum and swallow his last bite.

"Thanks." He says, clearing his thoat and picking at the crumbs on his plate.

"Sure." Sam says, he feels awkward, doesn't know why.

"Is that bread from Jimmy's?" Bucky asks, breaking Sam out of his thoughts.

"Yeah. Maria brought it back when she went to check on him." Sam said, taking another small bite. Bucky nods and rests his cheek on his knuckles.

"Thought so. He makes the best fucking bread. Like, it just melts in your mouth, but it's still fluffy and dense." Sam watches Bucky shake his head, like Jimmy's bread is a marvel to him. And Sam agrees, his bread is the best, but he wasn't going to say that. Bucky looks at him and his brow furrows again, Sam swallows very carefully, taking care not to choke as Bucky's eyes bore into him.

"Is he okay? Why was Maria checking on him?" Bucky asks, and Sam will give him one thing, he does sound genuinely concerned.

"He's alright. Being threatened, like all the other businesses. We gave him some extra security. He's okay. For now." Sam explained, and then sighed, shoving the last bite of his sandwich in his mouth. He rubbed at his eyes, he could feel Bucky watching him. He hears him take a deep breath and let it out.

"Wade told me to tell you he had something to do for his F-word, said you know what that meant." Sam said, cutting off anything Bucky might have been about to say, when he drops his hands Bucky is staring at him, his features soft. He licks his lips and nods.

"Did he leave recently?" Bucky asks, and Sam's greatful he took the change of subject.

"Little after noon." Sam says, reaching across the island toward Bucky's plate, nodding at him when he pushed it forward for Sam. Bucky nods and doesn't say anything else. Sam cleans the plates and puts them away. He looks at the sandwich ingredients on the island, almost asks if Bucky wants another one, but decides against it and cleans those up too. Once the island is clean he just stands there, once again feeling odd in his own kitchen as Bucky watches him. He sees Bucky lay his palms flat against the marble and hears him take a breath.

"So these people-"

"Not now." Sam cuts him off, stares at Bucky as he frowns back at him, daring him to argue.

"We both need sleep." Sam says, sighing, his shoulders drooping in exhaustion. Bucky doesn't argue, Sam can see that he wants too, he can see that glint in his eyes. Though the longer Sam holds his gaze the less sure he is about what the glint means.

"Okay. Tomorrow." Bucky says, his eyes still staring.

"Tomorrow." Sam agrees, and walks toward the door slowly. He stops with his hand on it, pushing it open a bit, and turns back to Bucky, his eyes go wide again, waiting.

"Your friend... left his foot in our freezer. Might wanna get that back to him." Sam says and walks out the door. The corner of his mouth twitching as he hears Bucky laugh behind him.

[iamnightduchess]

HELLO QUEEN! Oh my gosh your latest updates have gotten me so hyped up and happy!! I love the feeling of seeing your post updates on my dashboard. I was wondering if you had time if you could possibly do some NSFW head cannons for It’s Gotta Be You universe?? I reread it again for the 100th time after reading your AYA update but I love that universe so much!

Hello dearie! I hope you've been doing well ever since. I apologize for the slight delay as RL is demanding a lot of my time. But, I hope you'll enjoy this! ❤

Reiner x Mikasa (ReiKasa) (R20+) Fic AU Headcanon #13

Universe: It's Gotta Be You (Modern AU)

(A/N: ‼️WARNING‼️Graphic/Explicit Description of very dirty smut with potentially provocative images ⛔ Please don't click Keep Reading if you're below 20 🙅‍♀️ Sorry kiddos! To my dear adult readers, please absorb this post's content with appropriate discretion & maturity)

---------

I've shared more of ReiKasa's detailed Modern AU sexcapades in this post and for this Ask, I'll explore the different preferences involved in their sex life. Based on this post, Reiner & Mikasa had a 10-dates rule before they actually become intimate with each other and that post describes briefly on their phenomenal sexual compatibility. Before they reach that 10th date goal, they decided to keep all their interactions chaste, which only adds up to the building sexual tension between them. These two has a spark that ignites from just a single touch. Therefore, it had been a truly challenging period for them to keep their magnetic pull in check.

When they were in high school, they've only ever held hands but has never even kissed. Reiner was raised to be a respectful gentleman and he's always letting Mikasa takes the lead. He waited until she was ready to get a little bit more physical with him, thus why he suggested the 10-DR. So when did they have their first real kiss?

On their 10th date.

First Time

Their first time with each other had been a literal afternoon delight. Mikasa missed out on their 10th date night because of an on-call emergency at the med centre, so they made up with a lunch date the next day. Sure, they've been clawing at each other's clothes from outside the car to his front door and had never even made it to his bedroom but they really made full use of his coffee table and his couch. If only those furnitures could talk, they would tell you very interesting stories that took place on that day.

Bedroom Jams

Reiner and Mikasa do not have a particular preferred soundtrack running in the background while they're getting down and dirty. But, they'd always have Linger by Cranberries or The Root's You Got Me to set them in the mood for some slow-dancing before revving up their engines for their inevitable sexy times.

One time, Reiner had jokingly put Boyz II Men's I'll Make Love To You on in the bedroom. Mikasa changed it immediately to The Devil in I by Slipknot. It felt like an out of body experience the whole time.

Reiner likes to do this little striptease dance to 90's boyband songs just to drive Mikasa up the wall 🤣 One time, he wanted to surprise Mikasa from work & started grinding against her booty with his sexy moves as soon as she crossed their living room, completely not realizing that his mother had also walked through the door as his wife had picked Karina up for dinner at their house. He got an earful from his own mother 😳

Sexting & Surprises

Reiner loves sending sexy text messages to Mikasa when she's at work or when he's away in Marley for work meetings. The nature of her work demands her to be on-call or be at work in longer shifts, therefore, his texts make her misses him even more. Mikasa would not admit it out loud but his naughty texts do get her in the mood to make a lot of love to him when she gets home 😏 Before someone asks, no, Reiner does not send his wife dick pics haha

Reiner is also the type who'd surprises her from a long night shift in the morning by making her breakfast in the kitchen with nothing but an apron on. Yeah, Mikasa had a good eyeful (and mouthful) of his buns alright *wink* Reiner would also surprise her with a hug from behind when she's doing meal preps in the kitchen BUT Mikasa would be the one slipping her hand in his pants while he's doing the dishes. These two really do love getting kinky in the kitchen.

Gabi accidentally walked in on them one time and poor girl was mentally scarred, she locked herself in her room the whole night.

Favorite Positions

Despite having athletic bodies and fit figures, Reiner and Mikasa do not experiment with odd, bizarre positions as much. Their favorite position is either tantric or golden arch as they love locking gazes while whispering their undying affection for each other (+more dirty-talking from Reiner!)

But when they're in the mood for a more rough loving, all fours in front of a mirror or standing/sitting wheelbarrow would be their favorite positions for them considering his superb upper body strength and her amazing flexibility (Reiner has those weekly yoga routines of hers to thank for!)

Dirty-talking

Reiner likes to do this a lot (even in public) that it'll always make Mikasa goes multiple shades of red. His dirty-talkings are adorable and dorky but although Reiner's very alert when reading the room, he also tends to forget in switching off his dirty-talking mode once he's in the mood.

One time, he was calling Mikasa when he's away for work training. She was driving and had him on speaker. He was feeling a bit frisky and told her flat out - he can't wait to come back home, get inside the showers with her and ram into her so hard that she can't walk straight that his Dr. Ackerman-Braun need to take sick leave for 2 days. Things went still and quiet from Mikasa until he heard Annie's voice from the other end.

Annie : Ram her with what, Reiner? Your 3-inch dick?

Reiner: Screw you, Annie.

Annie: Gross and hey, Armin's already doing a bang up job in screwing me. Besides, you don't need to worry about Mikasa missing you. I just bought her this brand new vibrator.

Reiner: Totally ignoring you, Annie. Mika, c'mon babe, you know the real deal's so much better.

Mikasa: Rein--

Reiner: I made you come three times before I leave. You don't need that thing right? Can you hold on until I get back, baby, please?

Mikasa: Rein, can we talk a bit later?

Reiner: It's just Annie there right?

Pieck: Hey, Reiner. I think you just terrorized Gabi.

Reiner: F**K

Turns out Pieck and an already traumatized Gabi were also in the car with Mikasa at that time. Reiner avoided showing his face in front of the two women and his own cousin for the next 2 months.

As mentioned, that wasn't the first time Gabi had such TMI of her cousin and his wife's sex life. Apart from walking in on Reiner and Mikasa in the kitchen, the couple had terrified her enough for life when she also walked into them doing the deed inside their own living room (They either forgot Gabi was staying the night or had thought she was asleep) Gabi never wanted to be near that couch ever again.

Public Sexcapade

They had a quickie in Grisha's basement during one family dinner with the Jeagers. Zeke almost walked in on them.

Reiner also owns a pickup truck. He likes to take Mikasa out for a night drive. He'll have the back boot of his truck all nice with warm covers and they'll park somewhere private uphill to stargaze. They'll make love underneath the stars in the open air and just hold each other afterwards. Mikasa loves to listen to Reiner as he tells her about his favorite constellations.

Body Appreciation

When Mikasa's body starts to grow when she's carrying their twins, Reiner develops a much higher level of appreciation towards her body because of the changes she's going through. Obviously he appreciates the tremendous increase of her cup size, but he notices every other parts of her that swells beautifully with every week of her pregnancy too. As shared in this pregnancy post, Mikasa had the upper side of her hormonal changes that Reiner was the one who's constantly be worrying that he'll poke the babies in their heads every time she gets in her special mood 😂 see, he's so adorkable!

Sneaky playtime(s)

Reiner & Mikasa would always have a burning fire in their marriage even as they grow older. The twins were not spared from the traumatizing knowledge of their parents' extracurricular activities, when they overheard their parents from outside their bedroom door one Sunday morning.

Miraé: Rémy, are Mama & Papa fighting? She said the F word to Papa. Oh, Papa said he's coming? To where?

Rémy: Jesus, Miraé. They're having sex.

Miraé: What's that?

Rémy: Aunt Gabi told me to stay away if we ever hear weird noises coming from Mama & Papa's bedroom because it means they're having their adult playtime.

Miraé: Let's just go next door and ask Uncle Armin & Aunt Annie about it.

Armin was speechless and red with embarassment while Annie cackled at the poor twins. Afterwards, Annie sent a photo of the twins in their family group chat with the caption "Please come pick up your kids at our house after you're done maintaining Mikasa's plumbing 🍆💧💧" 🤣

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Gosh, I really, really enjoyed working on this. Thanks again for the Ask, Anonie 🙈💕💋