#What are household brothers for if not to be trolled?

[sca-nerd]

Here we have a perfect example of SCA Chosen Family Dynamics.

1. Household Sister

2. Knight

3. Squire Nephew

[rewritingcanon]

i’ve seen relationship therapists and psychologists analyse hermione and ron’s relationship and conclude that they wouldn’t work out in the long run. they’ve argued for hermione to be with harry, krum, even DRACO (don’t understand how a counsellor can vow for canon dramione but alright) as an alternative partner for hermione since ron is “too insecure” to be with her and match her intelligent prowess or what have you.

i seriously don’t understand this sentiment. ron and hermione genuinely seem (almost) perfect to me, maybe not in the movies (a common denominator of people who don’t like romione is that they always cite evidence from the movies, since the films took a lot away from ron’s character and his growth), but definitely in the books.

looking at ron’s insecurities, a lot of people dredge his inferiority complex up to toxic masculinity primarily, when it was more explored how it was an effect of his home life (not gonna argue toxic masculinity wasn’t a factor, they’re teenagers in the 90s written by a pretty misogynistic woman so…). he was the youngest son out of how many children? all of his older brothers were brilliant in some way. bill was an extremely gifted spellcaster, charlie was gifted with magical beasts, percy’s academic score was unmatched, and fred and george (despite their trouble) were entrepreneurial inventor-geniuses. ron, on the other hand, was quite literally born a disappointment to his mother, who conceived him specifically because she wanted a daughter, whilst ginny was born her favourite (though, even then, ginny was gifted at quidditch). ron was mediocre in every sense of the word, and his two best friends were harry (one of the most famous wizards) and hermione (the smartest witch of her age yada yada). and i’ve seen people argue that harry was more welcomed by molly into the weasley household than ron ever was. this isn’t even mentioning the amount of bullshit he copped for being poor (people always downplay the blow to confidence being in poverty can have on a person who is constantly surrounded by people who not only have more, but look down on him for simply being unlucky as to not have what they do).

so yeah, ron was an envious kid, but he was that way not because he was an evil patriarchal conception but because he was lowkey neglected. and even then he was overall an extremely devoted and loyal friend to both harry and hermione, because he did genuinely love them.

there were many moments of ron standing up for hermione that was cut from the films, not as a guy who was romantically interested in her, but as a friend. ron arguing with snape for making hermione cry is one of my fav scenes in the books ru kidding me, and in the movies he AGREED with snape RU KIDDING ME. not to mention how ron was a sobbing violent mess when hermione was getting tortured in the last book, whereas he wasn’t nearly as bothered in the films. and the films cut out harry being a dick to ron about his familial concerns (in dh), so when ron left it seemed like a random dickish move over his jealousy towards harry and hermione’s relationship.

there’s also a million moments where they minimised ron’s usefulness in the books for comedic purposes (forbidden forest with aragog, troll scene, devils snare scene) so ron seems dumber than he is. like, he’s actually smart and a really good spellcaster…. in the books.

so simply by stating this most of the arguments against romione become void. “he’s too stupid/weak for her” simply not true. “he’s a terrible friend who doesn’t stand up for her” also not true. “he’s too insecure to have made a move on her,” yes, but given the context i don’t think people would freak on about ron’s upbringing, i think many would be more understanding, especially considering his growth. even if he wasn’t insecure, hermione is beyond incredible and is bound to make anyone nervous when pursuing her (not an excuse for ron to act like a dick, but it does explain a lot where the movies don’t). “they argue too much” they bump heads, none of the arguments they have are actually super damning, with the exception of ron leaving in deathly hallows.

maybe i’ve covered everything (excluding the abhorrent amount of classism that clouds people’s judgments around how they view ron when harping about how hermione deserves better? hopefully).

now, i know people won’t like me mentioning the cursed child, but i’m going to considering we actually get an insight of their life as a longterm married couple there. a lot of ron stans hated how ron was the only character that wasn’t doing something incredible. harry was head of the aurors, ginny was a famous quidditch player retired to a famous journalist, neville was a hogwarts professor, hermione was quite literally minister on magic. and ron…. ran the joke shop with george.

and i think this was almost the perfect route to go down for ron. because he was average, and was perfectly fine with just being average. hello?? that speaks leagues of growth for his character. he’s supportive of hermione’s work, he grounds her when she gets too caught up in being the literal president of wizarding society, and he still viciously defends her, minister or not. in fact, he’s proud to simply be known as hermione’s husband because he doesn’t feel the need to prove to anyone else his worth. the people he loves most know his worth, hermione never downplays or underestimates him, they are complete equals in the relationship in every single way that matters. they kept ron’s best qualities whilst making him seem more of a healed person. they work so well as a married couple without it seeming like mischaracterisation (not to mention the cursed child literally shows how those two are in love in every reality, so there quite literally can’t be a better partner for hermione or ron according to canon).

so i really don’t understand how professional relationship counsellors can go online and denounce it. probs because they only watched the movies, but it’s 2023 and ron stans should not STILL be fighting for their lives trying to defend him from people who simply don’t consume media with as much depth (which is fine, but one should clarify if they’re talking about the movies because i’ve seen people state they’re talking about the hp BOOKS when it’s simply just…. the films). anyways. romione on top, thanks to coming to my ted talk.

[littlestpetgoth]

Tell us more about your little homestucks?

ok.. ill only go over my descendent ocs because they're the ones ive been posting about recently, i have too many homestuck ocs to cover lol..

mayosi pyrope is the first descendent oc i made back when there was a brief trend on twitter to make, fan descendants of the trolls. i think i was inspired by ko's descendent acarid, and terezi being one of my favorite trolls i ended up making a bootleg pyrope. (and i draw them together all the time bc they rot my brain)

they're a radical transmasc weeaboo skater "vigilante" who grew up being raised by humans in a very normal average household where they got basically anything they wanted with no issues. their interests include; dishing out justice, watching animes, playing videogames, and doing sick tricks on their board. they wield a katana that resembles terezi's dragon cane.. they're my simplest designed character, and though they look a lot like terezi with a skirt and long hair their design was heavily influenced by dirk because i imagined that dirk has influenced some kind of anime character that mayosi obsesses over and has based their look on..

they aren't at all interested in, being a lawyer or anything like that and would like to take care of bad guys samurai batman style in their ideal world.. unfortunately the loving gently parenting of their human family didn't toughen them up enough so they're mostly a baby who doesn't do well when faced with conflict. mayosi's easily bossed around by anyone who firmly tells them to do something because they're too scared to step up and stand up for themself and others, they have a lot of shame for not being as strong and cool as terezi or red glare. real wet blanket.

uuuh like terezi, they weren't always blind. they were lured in by their ex best friend now super complex hate not boyfriend acarid and he poured acid into their eyes, ruining their vision and giving them crazy chem burn scars.. i think around this time they were also given their super rad pointy shades so they can look more like their hero, but it was a major blow to their confidence since not only are they a weak coward they're now a weak coward who can't see. they eventually learn to navigate the world via sound waves, its not as effective as terezi's sniff and taste vision but mayosi isnt as interested as smelling and licking everything in their presence.

example of what i think it's like for them here..

theyyy are convinced by acarid to join him in his perfect sburb sesh, where they eventually grow a pair and cut off his arm and gouge his eyes before being shot in the brain and killed dead without ever waking on their moon. (sad) mayosi's feelings about acarid, who essentially abuses and manipulates them constantly, are very complicated because they feel an obligation to take on the brunt of his crazy in order to protect everyone but also because they cling to the nostalgic memories they have of him and are hoping he'll one day go back to that.

kokesi megido is based on kokeshi dolls, i think she sees ghosts and is really scared of them so she's super skittish and is always finding ways to shoo them away.. she probably knows how to speak japanese ig, i dont have a lot to say about her unfortunately.. i like how her design turned out though.

grimir maryam and romato vantas are brothers adopted into a rich human family, they're both spoiled brats and are constantly bickering with each other when they aren't pretending the other exists. grimir is mute and likes to garden (sooo original, i know) and romato speaks a lot and is a hopeless romantic writer. shrug.

i don't have as much to talk about. for any of my descendents other than mayosi because i have a really hard time developing ocs when i dont have people to bounce ideas off of. i mean most of mayosi was formed around acarid's existence and from ko's influence, otherwise they also wouldn't be developed . sorry .

[freyrmichokolatte]

@xshandra STOPPP YOU'RE MAKING ME CRY WHAT

No but fr though just think about it

Just imagine Branch when he saw them getting captured and when the rest of Brozone got saved by Poppy and Viva he thought that they were going to leave him to die. Then imagine the shock on his face when they're still going after Ven and Vel to rescue him then after the whole fiasco they went back to Trollstopia to take a good rest. The brothers are all in Branch's bunker and Branch looked at them in the eyes and asked them why they saved him, when they explained it's because they love and care for him Branch hit them back with:

"But you hate me don't you?"

Those words are going to be stuck in their brains for a lifetime because no, they don't hate him, they never did. Thet realized how much they screwed up and how much they missed out on Branch's life, his childhood- but no, he didn't had a childhood because the day they walked out on him, the day they walked out on their baby brother to return to *their* childhood, it stole his. They all could've go back to him, but they didn't.

John Dory and Floyd did come back. But when they reached an empty Troll Tree, they didn't bother looking for him, they proclaimed him as dead.

Clay was scared to go back because of the Bregens. But he was still in the Troll Tree when they escaped the Bergens so why didn't he come back?

Bruce could've come back too, but he didn't.

All of this started because of a dumb arguement 20 years ago that could've been settled by communication but no, they're stubborn and said 'Fuck you I'm leaving this household!'

Now look at how it turned out. And when they found out Branch was gray for 20 years, it made them feel more guilty and shameful. That's why they promised theirselves that they'll make it right. They will be better brothers to Branch, learn about him and his interest and slowly build up eachothers trust again. Although it'll take a long time but they will get there.

[saturncoyote]

i know about the pop trolls,and the rock trolls, but what about the indie trolls? what about the alt trolls? I need to see some freaky troll representation in my life. Your art is slaying rn btw

HELL YEAH BROTHER we love funky guys in this household <3 !!

Speaking of freaky troll representation, y'all can have this funny little concept art i've got for a new Folk Troll OC i've been slowly chipping at the past couple of days, their name is Polaroid :-)

[socratesvisitsarcadia]

Panic

Tw: Panic attack

Another night in the Nuñez household, another night Claire had to spend “babysitting” her “little brother”. Even though it wasn't as bad as it had once been, with Nothenrique now usually content to leave her alone, save she brings some actual food for him (usually fast food), focusing on her studies was difficult with so many thoughts racing in her mind. Questions left mostly unanswered.

Her brother was safe in the Darklands, but for how long?

Chompsky had yet to return, and there had been no sign of the gnome, so no guide, how were they gonna navigate in there?

They had no clue what Jim's new weapon from either of the stones was going to be, they couldn't go in without knowing. 

She was perfecting the use of the Shadow Staff, but she was still unsure. 

And how on earth were they going to keep that secret from their parents?!

The thoughts spiraled through her mind, the textbook was important, but a lot more frustrating. So, pushing herself away from the desk, she groaned with much annoyance. Her changeling brother looked away from the magazine he read through, wanting to poke fun at her, but deciding ultimately against it. 

“Ya should take ‘a break!” 

“If my grades slip even a decimal, my parents are gonna know something’s up.” 

“Well, a break ain’t gonna ‘break ya’!” He found his own joke hilarious, Claire groaned again, turning to the book once more. “C'mon! Ye’r gonna cramp your brain muscles if ya keep this up!”

He climbed onto the desk, closing the book himself, he was looking after her after all. The girl frowned, about to argue when something else caught their attention. A loud thud, followed by a green glow in the distance and a tree falling, disappeared into the woods. If it was just the one tree, they would simply tell Jim and handle it some other day, when more of them started to fall, both understood the problem was more serious.

“Well, now I have to take a break!” Taking the shadow staff to her hands, Claire rushed out of the room.

“Aren’t you gonna tell the others?!” Her fake brother yelled, chasing her down the stairs. 

“I’ll tell them once I know what’s going on! Jim deserves some sleep.” She rushed out the door, leaving the small changeling behind. 

Not-Henrique wasn’t one to usually care deeply for people, though he would lie and say that he hadn’t gotten attached to the girl and her friends. Plus, it would be a hassle to try to explain the girl’s death and without a sister, “normal life” could not keep going.

So, he grabbed the walkie-talkie and told Blinky what was up. Then, he ran to make sure his sister didn’t die in the woods, taking her phone with him in case he needed to call 911.

It didn’t take long to track her, after all, she had a very characteristic lilac hand cream which he loved to eat. He found her hunched behind a bush, spying beyond the leaves, trying not to be seen. He rolled his eyes and tugged onto her leg, pulling his best puppy eyes up at her. 

“How could ya leave this cute face b’hind?” She shushed him, putting a hand over his mouth. “Oi! Don’t ‘shush’ me! I told yer friends where-”

“SHUHS- look!” She pointed, whispering. 

He grumbled under his breath. Beyond the bush, there was a troll, digging his dagger into an old, now petrified, tree stump in what looked like a fit of rage.

It was Angor Rot, obviously. So far, only he was known to have Creepersun poison, especially one potent enough to petrify even trees. But his behavior was beyond incomprehensible. He had shown himself to be so calm, collected, even under pressure, and now seemed completely rabid, stabbing the petrified stump with so much rage. It was the opposite of the troll they had left in the canal. Yet at the same time, between stabs, there was clear pain in his roars. 

If Claire was able to see him from a distance, then others would too, and she didn’t want to think about what would happen if they did find him in that state. Or if they found him at all. Thankfully she had the staff, so getting out of there in case of trouble was easy, but it wouldn’t solve the issue, and in that state, he could turn on her. 

“What's wrong with him?! He was fine the last time we saw him!” Claire watched as the troll in front of them became more and more agitated, continuing to tear down trees and break them. 

She had to do something.

Climbing out of the bush, much to the worry of the changeling, she clutched the staff tighter and approached the troll.

“Angor Rot?” Her voice froze him in place, he turned slowly and eerily towards her, who clutched tighter to the staff, ready to diverge a blow. “What’re you doing here?” 

The troll swerved around, staring at her, instantly dropping his weapon and crawling away from her as if she were some sort of dangerous beast. “Please- I didn’t- I-”

His voice rang desperate, terrified even, his breathing speeding up and eyes getting distant. She recognized the signs of a panic attack from a mile away, or what seemed like the equivalent of it, however, she had no idea if it was similar to trolls or what to do in a situation such as that. She was at an utter loss, yet did what she could. 

“It’s okay, it’s okay I’m not gonna hurt you, you’re okay!” Her words seemed to phase right through him as she put the staff away, and any movement she made seemed to scare him even more. 

If he ran, he could run to the street, and that would be a disaster. It was like trying to wrangle an animal, one conscious, sentient and very scared animal. 

Thankfully, soon the others arrived. Jim was the first to call out, reaching the girl and looking over for any injuries, which he thankfully did not find. “Claire what’s going on?!”

“I- I don’t know- I found him like that and I think he’s having a panic attack or something! I don’t know what happened!” 

Blinky took the front, confirming the girl’s thought. “You are right, Claire. He is in the middle of a panic attack. I’ll handle it. Just stay back. Aarrrgh. Stay with them.”

The conundrum approached Angor calmly, moving slowly and fluidly, keeping all his hands in sight, not that it seemed to matter as he now kept his eyes somewhere on the ground frozen. Once in front of the other, blocking his view of where he once glanced, he knelt. “Angor Rot, I-”

“Don’t! call me that!-” He screamed, a mix of shame and anger seeping into his voice, shielding his face as he panted frantically, kicking back and pushing himself further away from the trollhunters. “I’m not a rot! I’m not- a blight!! That’s not my name!” 

“That’s alright! That’s quite alright. Is just Angor fine then?” The other continued gasping for air, but nodded. “Alright. Angor. I need you to look at me, can you do that please?” Shakily, he did, meeting with the Conundrum’s calm semblance as he picked up a rock. “Follow this stone, alright? While you do so, breathe. When it changes hand, you inhale and exhale…” He started moving it across his four arms, changing it slowly and carefully. “In… out… in… out…”

The pattern continued, slowly, Angor’s breathing slowed as well his shaking ceased altogether. Soon reaching a point where he did not need to watch Blinky switch hands, just continued breathing slowly. The ones who watched sympathized with him, many times during their trials as trollhunters they had similar experiences, Jim personally wasn’t surprised after all the times Blinky had to calm him down from several panic attacks. Jim unsummoned the armour, pocketing the amulet into his hoodie, slowly and calmly walked toward the troll.

“Are you feeling better?” Angor took one last deep breath before nodding. Finally shifting his eyes up to meet the rest of the group, who he now realized gazed down at him with what he remembered to be sorrow or pitty. “That’s great. Now, my friend, what has you so terrified?”

The troll sighed, glancing to the side where the Inferna Copula sat on a stone, carefully placed upon a stone. 

Claire caught on first. “Your soul… Did something happen?”

Angor brought a hand to his horns, tapping the very point of one of his ram-like antlers, trying to avoid the embarrassment of the words next. “No… I… I couldn’t do it… I couldn’t risk…” 

Although he didn’t finish his sentence, all knew what he was referring to. A tension loomed over the area, the group was silent, none with particular answers at hand. 

It was awkward enough for the changeling to speak up. “Listen’ spooks. Your situation is real bad, doin’ your magic stuff’s this close to town ‘s gonna get you found and worse. So… Why doncha take this elsewhere?”

“I thought I was far enough…” He rubbed his face, gazing to the side where he could see the moving cars, he was too close. He moved to collect his ring, putting it back in its chain. “Apologies for disturbing you.” 

He began walking off, though, that did not feel like a good solution to the problem. Angor didn’t feel like a bad troll, after all, he did have the history of being a warrior, one who was misled. Jim knew betrayal close to his heart, he felt a call again, and he was bound to answer it. 

Turning to his friends, who all had the same thought process as him, he reached out. 

“Hey Angor!” The troll stopped in his tracks, turning to the boy once again. “Look, it’s… Kinda obvious you don’t know what you’re doing right now with the whole soul-bound-to-a-ring situation. It was obvious three days ago and it’s even more now.” The troll had plain tiredness in his eyes, a feeling quite relatable. “And you’re right, it’s too dangerous to mess with your soul out of all things. So… Hey, why don’t you come with us to Trollmarket and ask Vendel? He might have a solution, or something similar?”

“Yeah! Come with us, man! Vendel can be an old goat but recently he’s been helping Jim a lot!” Toby chimed in excitedly, wrapping an arm around Jim’s shoulders. 

“And how exactly would I walk in there?” Both boys peeked up at him, slight confusion in their brows. “I am known as a soulless assassin, brutal killer of Trollhunters, who’s… Taken souls…” There was an ache in his voice, neither doubted why. “The moment I set foot in there, there will be a mob trying to kill me.”

“Jim can protect ya! No one will hurt you!” The chubby boy’s confidence in his friend’s ability to calm an entire town of trolls was inspiring, yet, unrealistic. “Or… You could sneak in! Just, spy your way in! I mean, from what we know you’re really sneaky right?”

That… was indeed a better alternative, not fewer risks, but more realistic. “I would be able to get in unnoticed, I’ve been known to gather information without them knowing.” 

“In today’s terms: Spying on people.” Blinky pipped up, always excited to teach new things to people.

“Right. So… I can do it, but it won’t be easy.”

“Or we could ask Vendel to come up here for a house visit! I mean, if we get him to know it’s an emergency!” Claire also pipes up, getting next to Jim as well. “He’s not very fond of coming up, but I’m sure he’d rather avoid the risk of a big commotion.”

Also a much better option, yet, Vendel had only left Trollmarket once in the past three centuries and he was constantly complaining about never doing it again, under any circumstance. So it was just as much of an option as him sneaking into the underground. Angor looked away from the kids, waiting for the team’s verdict.

“Well. Both options lay on the caller’s hands.” The conundrum stated, putting a hand on the troll’s back, much to Angor’s confusion. “It’s your soul and thus your choice. So. What do you choose?”

Having a choice was something Angor became a stranger to for centuries, so now, being blatantly given it, it was foreign. It took a second to make his choice, after once again looking through the options. “I… Would rather stay away from that place. Even as I watched all of you in there… When I look back something feels wrong.”

“Wait, you  followed us in there?” 

“Not all of me.” He removed his right eye, rolling it around in his hand with pure strength of thought. “A trick I learned centuries ago.”

All were unnerved by it but tried to pay more mind to the challenge at hand. “Sounds… Good then! We’ll bring Vendel! Meanwhile, you wait-” 

Jim was going to say “here” when there was the sound of people coming through the woods. Panic quickly spread through the group, Aaarrrgh whisked Toby and both hid beneath some big bushes and trees, Angor climbed on top of a tree, hiding amongst its foliage, blinky seeking to hide behind a few thicker tree trunks, while Nonenrique hid inside said trunks, leaving Jim and Claire as the only two exposed. The girl knew the voice of her family, approaching through the woods. If she was caught there, there’d be a worse penalty than a simple grounding. 

“Trollhunters, here!” Angor called and reached out his hands to the two, who darted, clinging to them and almost just as fast being pulled up. 

There was no better option available at that moment anyways.

The Nuñez parents walked past them, examining the new rocks amongst the greenery, both of them speaking in Spanish as they transited through the group, not noticing anything besides the weird rocks. Claire made an annoyed face, which solidified the point of them not wanting to know what they were saying. 

“We need to get back to my house. If my parents don’t find me and ‘Henrique’ there, we’re doomed!” Claire whispered fiercely, sitting on a branch keeping away from the path of sight of the adults.

“Do you have the Staff of Shadow?” Angor queried as Claire produced the item, understanding the plan, yet showing concern. “Should I really be giving this to you?”

“Have you spent seven centuries with it?” 

Valid point. 

She handed it and the troll quickly made a portal for the three of them, pulling Claire and Jim inside. Inside the shadow realm, they floated through, Angor made another small portal, pulling Not-Henrique through as well, kicking the log somewhere else. Once all fully emerged from the portal, they were inside the Nuñez’s house, more specifically in the girl’s living room. The changeling turned back into a human baby, Claire rushed and placed him on the feeding table in the kitchen and gestured for Angor and Jim to run out the door and hide in the backyard. 

Soon after both of them left, hiding amongst the bushes, the girl's parents arrived through the front door. “Hi Mom! Hi dad! You’re home early!”

“We actually came in earlier and didn’t find you or Henrique. Where did you go?” the voice of Councilwoman Nuñez rang as serious as ever, with her husband right behind, eyeing her daughter sternly.

“Oh! I was… Getting Henrique food! His baby food ran out, so I went to buy some more!” Good lie.

“At this hour?”

“I had a few friends take me! We were safe all the way!” Claire assured the sound of the microwave ringing and proving her statement. 

That seemed to convince the adults, much to the calm of the other two…

The ringing of Jim’s phone erased all that calm.

In a quick reaction, Angor opened another portal, teleporting both of them back to the opening where Blinky and the others were, Jim falling a lot less graciously than the troll. “Dude?! Where did you go?!”

“Back to Claire’s house so she doesn’t get her head cut off by her parents.” Jim replied, getting up and brushing off the dirt. “Look, we were gonna say you could wait here, but it’s waaaay too close to the other houses. Just come to the edge of Trollmaket, you don’t need to come in, just stay out if you want. But it’s better than staying here and risking being seen.”

Again, the troll felt a tightness again, anxiety, fear, apprehension. With another look towards Blinky, who gestured for a deep breath, he did and nodded, following them. 

The walk there wasn’t unknown to him, after all, he had followed them to the entrance before. But now, there was new weight to it, even the last time he was at Trollmarket’s door he felt another a wave extreme of uneasiness. Something about that place felt wrong in a thousand ways. His eyes were focused on each grass strips as he walked, paranoia startling him with each sound that came from behind the shadows. Most of the time being something minimal, like a true raccoon, seemed to make him even more defeated.

It was impossible not to notice how agitated he was, again, bringing more pity from the team. They all exchanged looks with each other, communicating without words, mostly through gestures and eye movements.

Aaarrrgh understood there was communication being done there, yet couldn’t understand what exactly. Looking back at Angor, he saw himself, just leaving Gunmar’s army, with an entire society that hated him for what he did, he didn’t pity Angor like the others but he wanted to help. Knowing himself, if he was in that situation again, he would get what his Wingman called “cold feet” and run away, and in his situation, it wouldn’t do well.

“We stay with you.” He pats the other’s back again, snapping him from his thoughts. “We stay waiting Vendel with you.” 

“Yeah! We can stay with ya man! Don’t want the anxiety getting worse than it is, right?” Toby pipped up from Aaarrrgh’s back, sliding from Aaarrrgh’s back now that they had reached the canal, hopping up excitedly. “Also, like, is it okay if I ask you some questions? Like, nothing personal, or that at least shouldn’t be- But like, we never met a troll that looks like you and I really wanna know more!”

It was clear Angor was dubious about it, almost denying it. But Toby made the effort to clear up what he imagined were the doubts.

“If we cross a line- just tell me! I am very understanding! Also! You don’t gotta answer questions you don’t want to! Just say ‘pass’ and we move on! No questions asked!” Angor snorted, containing himself as quickly as he did. “Pun-not-intended and yet glad it was appreciated!” 

Thinking it over one more time, Angor agreed to the terms. “Alright. I’ll indulge you.” 

[crumbazaar]

I rewatched Trolls Band Together, the movie still holds up really well, it's a nicely constructed story without too many clunker jokes and the character beats are all amazing imo.

Branch: Literally never takes off the vest.

The Better Place Whistles start kicking in when the team finds Bruce's postcard sunset!

Not a huge fan of the pink eye visual, but I love the design of these chars and seeing Bruce's kids touch their eyes setting up the ending joke.

Uh oh, don't rub your eye buddy!

What did I say!?

Not you too!

Save yourself, Bruce!

Velvet's instant button mash when Crimp reveals the shoulder pads kills me!

Bruce: Oh, my kids love these guys we're a total Veneer household! JD: They're the ones who have Floyd! Bruce: Ahh, it's gonna be hard to separate the art from the artist.

Viva time! Her design is awesome and they really do a nice job threading the characterization of her (and Poppy) so that they come off endearing rather than overbearing.

Poppy instant bond!

Poppy: Is this how people feel when they meet me? Branch: Yes.

This song slaps, Camila and Anna's voices mesh together so nicely and the Brozone brodown breakdown is a good changeup (while foreshadowing John Dory's overbearing nature coming back).

Viva's reveal of not wanting to let Poppy (or any trolls) leave is handled really delicately here. She doesn't even lock Poppy in anywhere, or try to keep her from anyone, she just tells her she can't leave and shuts the gate. She doesn't even physically restrain her when she goes even though as a char she does a lot of physical feats. It's nice because it doesn't overshadow the character moment of how traumatized she is from the Bergen attack. And Poppy ends the scene still trying to reach out emotionally (this will be important later!)

She literally starts panicking after taking 3 steps out of the gate. Nice shot with the shadow creating the border between the outer world and Viva's sanctuary.

Rageous cutaway. Love their designs btw. Pictured above is Vaneer resisting his Spider-Man origin moment. Also there's some theming with Floyd relaying some advice for dealing with overbearing siblings.

Cutting back to the Broz! This is my favourite bit of the whole movie outside of the finale. Everything comes to a head, the other brothers' resentment of John Dory, how they all treat Branch like he's still a baby, his bunker (which is a direct influence on why he turned out how he did). It's genuinely sad how Branch is rejected by his family, and how he tries to shut out Poppy because of how low it brings him. Basically, he tries to revert back to his loner status of the first movie (WOW!) But Poppy reaches out to him, engages genuinely with his emotional state and reassures him that she's there for him. It's really sweet!

The Brozone argument also contrasts really well with the Viva scene where she instantly assumed she was going to be with her sister for life while the brothers are all waiting to return to their regular lives without each other.

Floyd immediately recognizes how much Branch has grown unlike his brothers. It's a really cathartic moment after how much his other brothers belittle him. It's especially touching because Floyd gave it to Branch as a memento that has kind of become a security blanket. But he doesn't belittle him for caring about the vest or still wearing it.

Best Bros!

That's all I really wanted to point out. The ending is still super impressive, but I think I posted about that sequence before. Branch leading Brozone into a song with Poppy and Viva forming the perfect family harmony first with Branch and then his band is the perfect way to end this film and encapsulate the relationships that drive the franchise.

[smiting-finger]

[Director’s Commentary] a harmony between qin and se

As promised (to like two interested people lol), here’s my commentary to accompany a harmony between qin and se, some of which has been retrieved from discussions in the AO3 comments section.

CHAPTER 1

This being Wei Ying’s story, the first chapter is entirely an introduction to her. I’ll let the text mostly speak for itself, but some additional thoughts:

She is, first and foremost, a very unreliable narrator when it comes to  herself.

Despite what she says, as a direct equivalent to “number 4 most eligible bachelor in the Jianghu”, she is actually considered to be a solid choice for a daughter-in-law (mostly because of how well she’s managed to hide all her quirks from the public eye). She also has more than one young male admirer because she is, in fact, an attractive lady The main thing working against her is the circumstances of her birth and the related lack of connections/assets.

Auntie Yu and Uncle Jiang have received a few overtures from interested parties already, but they’re still using the excuse of “Eldest daughter must be married out first” while they figure out the quality of offer they can settle for (which admittedly does include consideration of the potential benefits to the Jiang family).

Her embroidery is fine, if you ignore the fact that she’s constantly embroidering unconventional patterns: Jiang Cheng has most certainly received more than one troll hebao, and there have also been many an embroidered flower or cloud pattern that bears a suspicious resemblance to something outrageous (no penises because Wei Ying is a Proper and Good Girl and has never seen one until the bedroom books, but almost certainly an unflattering caricature of Jin Zixuan’s face, and the occasional rude Chinese character - always with plausible deniability, of course).

Broadmindedness is for women who have become disillusioned with the mortal coil. Which is to say: Nuns. She takes another bite of meat: I’m not sure if I was right in assuming that it was common knowledge that Buddhist nuns are vegetarian, but if I wasn’t - Wei Ying is definitely Making a Statement here. (And also making a secondary reference to the Chinese use of "vegetarian" to mean someone who is easily bullied/taken advantage of, which Wei Ying is most certainly not.)

Girls of the era were sometimes educated at home by private tutors, and were also often educated by their older brothers.

We know that Wei Ying had a private tutor (whom she shared with Nie Huaisang), but I also think Jiang Cheng would have had an influence on her too, despite technically being younger.

Being afforded a much more formal and comprehensive education (despite being perhaps less suited for it), he would have shared all of his books and learnings with Wei Ying, and that is why she so often references martial arts/military writings and ideas (much more so than the Jiang Yanli of this universe would, being older) - a reflection of Jiang Cheng’s interests and their relationship as more-or-less-same-age-peers within a gendered family hierarchy.

On Nie Huaisang and Nie Mingjue, it bears saying that their upbringing and situation in life here is just as unconventional as Wei Ying’s, if not more so.

Whereas in the earlier Tang Dynasty, women often openly ran their own businesses, Song Dynasty society had become more restrictive in relation to women’s freedoms, so that had become a much rarer occurrence.

My rationale for Nie Mingjue bucking the trend is that her mother was a capable woman with no tolerance for harem politics, and so ruled the Nie household with an iron fist. When her health begins to decline, instead of risking the wellbeing of her household and single di daughter on the goodwill of the next-ranked concubine, she simply starts passing responsibilities directly to Nie Mingjue, who proves capable enough that her father starts giving her business-related tasks as well.

By the time Madam Nie dies, Nie Mingjue is acting mistress of the house and there is no room to argue that any of the responsibilities should be taken from her.

Nie Mingjue being the only child in the entire household, her father also thinks it makes sense to involve her in the family business, and he starts preparing to find a man to ru zhui (入贅) marry into their family, thanks to the (universal?) principle that wealthy people can largely afford to do whatever they want.

Then Nie Huaisang is born and her concubine mother dies in childbirth. Nie Mingjue, having inherited her mother’s distaste for harem politics and distrust for her father’s concubines, simply takes Nie Huaisang into her own courtyard and sees to her upbringing herself.

And then their father dies, Lan Xichen takes the opportunity to propose marriage to Nie Mingjue (ostensibly as an elegant way to lend her a man’s countenance and legal authority to run her business, but the successive pregnancies speak for themselves), Nie Mingjue accepts and then decides that the new Nie family heir will be Nie Huaisang and there is no one around to stop her.

There’s definitely social disapproval (e.g. Madam Jin’s “I know she’s always done things differently” in Ch 3), but not enough to matter. Because wealthy people can afford to do whatever they want..

Enter Lan Zhan (in spirit):

Some of the original professions I considered for him were physician and herbalist, but the thought of doing period-accurate traditional Chinese medicine research ended that dream within 2.5 seconds.

In today’s terms I see him as demisexual, but in Song Dynasty mindset, there is no “sexuality”; there is “stuff that I like” and “stuff that I gotta do”. So he’s fully committed to making it work for the sake of his duty to the family, but also his responsibility to provide his wife with a decent quality of life. (And he is particularly sensitive to the latter, having witnessed his mother’s experience.)

While he'd initially hoped to follow in his Uncle's footsteps and stay single for life, now that marriage is unavoidable, his attitude towards it is very similar to Wei Ying’s, in being “That's life, we gotta make the best of it.”

He doesn’t fully appreciate the extent of the problem, but:

To-date, he has had very minimal interaction with any sort of same-age friend or peer.

His brother does most if not all of his emotional processing for him, mostly by talking him through his thoughts and feelings. This started as the very-Chinese “explain to your child after every situation how courtesy and social mores preserve everyone’s feelings and Face”, and just … never stopped. Probably because Lan Zhan didn’t have peer-interaction to do the rest of the emotional educating.

CHAPTER 2

Again, while Wei Ying speaks for herself, some general notes:

The grip of his hand in hers is strong, if a little damp. Which means that her husband is either nervous or also sweating a river in three layers of robes: He is not nervous, only dutiful. It is 100% due to the layers of robes and the hot, hot sun.

Red wedding banners … which are disappointingly standard, with nary a tea pun in sight: When their sons get married in the distant future, there are SO MANY tea puns.

Her groom, she notes, has wiped his hand at some point. Which means that he’s either a thoughtful man, or a fastidious one. Or a man who has thoughtful and fastidious servants: Lan Zhan is absolutely the thoughtful and fastidious one.

“Why does the groom look so grim?” someone asks from somewhere to her right. “Maybe he’s been forced into the marriage,” comes the answer: That is just Lan Zhan’s face, he bears no particular resentment towards the arrangement of the marriage. He trusts that his uncle has made the best decision possible under the circumstances and certainly he thinks that it’s better than either of the other options.

Lan Zhan has never had wine before, so despite knowing that the Lan family doesn’t drink, he doesn’t actually know why. This is part of the reason why he drinks the toast (the other part being the social pressure that Wei Ying successfully employs).

When they have children, there are some that inherit the Lan constitution, and others who can drink two whole cups before also succumbing to the Lan constitution. Wei Ying is very sad about this, but concedes that they do come by it honestly.

Lan Zhan’s wedding night thoughts:

Not sure if it A) was a real thing, B) is a modern-sensibilities thing (like many Cdrama leads being committed to one wife), or C) is a "Complying with TV Codes Thing", but I've seen/read quite a few stories now where the husband chooses not to push for wedding night consummation because his new wife will be scared, stressed, tired, etc. This means that the couple spends a bit of time co-sleeping and getting used to each other before doing anything. I see Lan Zhan starting out along those lines, and his consideration would have been much appreciated if his wife had been someone like Jiang Yanli. Unfortunately it is 100% wasted on Wei Ying.

So he walks into the room with the noblest of intentions, is confronted with the shock of Wei Ying, and PANICS:

First there are the Lan vs Jiang family cultural differences, i.e.

The "We Are Always Decorous" Lan family vs the "Decorum when in public, at-home manners very different" Jiang family

Lan "I will only very gently try to negotiate your boundaries" Xichen vs ...Jiang Cheng/Yanli/Auntie Yu/Uncle Jiang, who are personal-boundary-chaotics in very different ways

Second, in terms of Lan Zhan’s general social experience:

He has one (1) friend, who is his brother and who is very emotionally considerate.

He has not interacted with a woman in an intimate/domestic setting since the death of his mother (excluding servants, but that’s different). His experience with women is probably limited to the branch family aunties, and maybe daughters of their social circle who he sees for two seconds from across the room, when everyone is on their best behaviour, and they never speak.

He has never interacted with any person alive like Wei Ying in any setting. She called him PRETTY and TO HIS FACE, she chases people, she has contraband goods, she has POCKETS-

Third, there is the additional layer of shock provided by the expectations Lan Zhan had of what “a new wife” would be like, which Wei Ying is … not.

She was going to be a shy, retiring maiden (I think the “unkidnappable” fact just did not compute and he just mentally shelved it).

And unlike Wei Ying, who had the whole breadth of her human experience as “possible range for how much of a fucking weirdo my husband might be”, it never occurs to Lan Zhan to be curious about her because his image of his future wife is pretty much a dress wearing a face and it hasn’t really occurred to him that she might have any personality - or UNREPRESSED personality -  beyond her role and his obligations towards her.

He had this idea of how he was going to be a Dutiful Husband (making sure his wife doesn't go hungry on the wedding night, making sure that her maidenly sensibilities are respected in negotiating bedroom activities, making sure that she maintains a comfortable position in the household, making sure that she gets the dishes she likes to eat even if he doesn't eat them).

Then they were gonna treat each other "with the respect accorded to honoured guests" (another Ye Olde Chinese Thing), and eventually become a peaceful, comfortable couple.

Almost none of it is going in the way that he'd planned and he doesn't have a Plan B because he DIDN'T KNOW PEOPLE COULD BE LIKE THIS.

And now HIS MAIDENLY SENSIBILITIES ARE BEING OFFENDED-

In regards to Lan Zhan’s Filial Procreative Duty:

It's not that he's unaware of it, but there's not as much urgency for him. He doesn't need a son to solidify his position in the household, his own brother has two sons already so the line isn't in danger and he can always adopt the second nephew as his heir, he knows that WY is only 17 whereas the average age of marriage at the time (according to the english-language internet) was 18-20 for women.

He does intend to try for a child with her eventually (for her sake), but HE JUST REALLY WANTS TO START BY BEING FRIENDS FIRST (*/ω＼*)

CHAPTER 3

On Lan Zhan’s side:

It goes without saying that after Lan Zhan flees his bedroom on the morning after the wedding, he heads straight to his brother for his regular dose of emotional processing.

Lan Xichen spends the entire conversation highly amused and trying to keep it hidden under a suitably sympathetic expression.

And then he gently-but-firmly forces Lan Zhan to go home, which Lan Zhan does mutinously

Upon their arrival home, Lan Zhan only stops briefly in his study before heading straight back out on business (or, as Wei Ying half-suspects: “business”): It is most certainly “business”. Lan Zhan is finding any excuse to avoid her because he does not know how to deal with her and he’s a little bit afraid of her (and the danger she poses to his chastity).

Lan Zhan says nothing to Lan Qiren because it is all too mortifying.

Lan Qiren, who still seems to vaguely disapprove of her, despite being the one to agree to this marriage in the first place: While he hears no specifics, Lan Qiren’s propriety-related spidey-senses are tingling nevertheless, and so he starts to observe Wei Ying with extreme suspicion.

Lan Xichen also finds this highly amusing.

Hence Wei Ying noticing that “There’s something about the curve of his eyes that means he always looks mildly amused…Wei Ying is not sure whether this is how Lan Xichen presents generally, or if it is something specific to her.“

(It’s definitely specific to her. He thinks she’s great for his brother and therefore great in general)

Otherwise, Lan Zhan actually does like Wei Ying, despite all of the shocking things about her (He just doesn’t know that this is what he’s feeling, since he’s never felt this way before :’D).

Also maybe he’s used to the people he likes expressing their affection for him via some level of teasing (his mother, to a lesser level his brother).

Lan Zhan is watching Wei Ying as closely as she’s watching him (or even more so) - enough to know that she’s smart, and that there’s more to her than the incompetent wife image she’s projecting (which is why he’s not interfering … beyond a certain extent).

Other notes:

Wei Ying herself is so fully focused on the branch family aunties and how far she needs to escalate to get them to make a move that she probably hasn't given two thoughts to thing else. So there's almost certainly a parallel Mianmian POV to this story that's filled with constant nail-biting about what everyone else thinks of her mistress and the possibility of Wei Ying escalating so hard that they won't be able to fully reverse the damage afterwards.

Secret tunnel + secret storage room: Wei Ying absolutely finds 193847548495 future uses for these after this story is done.

Babymaking is 100% a genuinely high-key concern for Wei Ying, since producing Lan Zhan’s heir is how she secures lifetime economic/social/etc security for herself (that said it is not the MOST urgent issue at this stage, since she first needs to ensure that there is a safe environment to bring the baby into).

(I am high-key channelling "The Promotion Record of a Crown Princess" and "Greetings Ninth Uncle", here. Dowager is very much the life goal for All Women - when it's not Revenge - as far as my own shameful background in consuming Chinese historical romances is concerned.)

In terms of inheritance (keeping in mind that I am far from an expert, and my main source is a lot of historical Cdramas and Cnovels):

There was some amount of flexibility in when to formally split a family and therefore its shared resources:

If there are enough resources to support a split, then a patriarch dying is a good opportunity for brothers to go their own ways without any negative social implications.

If there's a big enough falling out between brothers or between fathers and sons, then it might happen even while Dad's still around.

If you're collectively funding a scholar to get into government and bring a valuable political connection to the family, then maybe you stay together even after Dad is gone.

And the division of property (including property in common) wasn't automatically an "eldest son takes all" situation either.

For the Lan brothers in this story:

The formal economic rational for them not splitting the business yet is that they need the business to fund a government career (Lan Qiren and Lan-papa were intending to maintain a similar arrangement before Lan-papa prematurely died)

But the actual reason is probably Lan brotherly love :'>

The branch families inherited other things, or maybe a different branch of the business when Great-grandpapa Lan died, but then they fucked it! and had to come crawling back to Lan-papa for a lifeline.

Wei Ying knows enough going in (from Nie Huaisang and general gossip) that whenever the brothers finally split (maybe after proxy-dad Lan Qiren dies), Lan Zhan is walking away with a handsome part of the business. Now that she's seen them in close quarters, she knows that Lan Xichen might even cede all of it, at the end of a soppy and embarrassing "no, you!"-"no, you!" fight between the brothers

Rivalled only by the parallel fight between the Nie sisters about whose kids inherit the restaurant empire, and then Nie Huaisang declares her intention to stay a spinster and adopt Nie Mingjue's second son as the Nie heir and then it's chaos.

Or maybe they can grow a tea empire and someone’s children can stay in Lin An and someone else’s children can go establish dominance over a different city.

CHAPTER 4

Lan Zhan’s side of things is coming through more clearly in the text now (I hope), but some notes nevertheless:

Then, she sends some to her husband’s study to serve him as a mid-afternoon snack, and to remind him of her continued existence: By this point, Lan Zhan has realised that he like-likes Wei Ying, so he’s very much aware of her continued existence already.

This gesture on her part seeds a hope that she might at least be receptive to his overtures, if she doesn’t yet feel the same way about him, and the pork-and-ginger-with-extra-ginger dumplings are him trying to take what he thinks is their courtship forward (“In thanks for the pastries … They were delicious.”).

Growing up with Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen and no other friends, it never occurs to him that Wei Ying might not be fluent in the Lan communication method of “indirect statements from which the audience correctly infers implied meanings”.

That the pastries turn out to be for a plot is a small bump in the road that is overcome by all of the “just for you” foods Wei Ying overcompensates with when he finds out.

“Do you…Never mind”: Lan Zhan would never say ‘DO U LIKE ME’, but this is him starting an overture that is (slightly) more direct and then not knowing how to continue and fleeing the scene.

Wei Ying modestly yields to her husband’s leadership, and that is why they spend the evening stopping in front of every opera singer, acrobat or other street performer who crosses their path: Young Master Lan Zhan conducting a thorough study on “what my wife likes”.

The direct consequence of this outing (as mentioned in Ch 5) that Wei Ying is Seen to have Lan Zhan’s esteem is also very much intentional on his part, because Lan Zhan is also thoughtful and efficient like that.

Other notes:

Since making lotus seed paste is a tedious, thankless task that normal families pay other people to do: My love-hate letter to lotus seed paste. I mostly know about the process for making it because I briefly considered making it myself during the first COVID lockdown. This desire lasted approximately 20 seconds into the first instructional youtube video I watched. But it is still delicious.

They pass yet another group of burly, scruffy men - all of whom are carrying an array of mismatched, chipped and obviously-scavenged weapons: foreshadowing for Wei Ying’s realisation in Ch 8, lol.

CHAPTER 5

Notes on Lan Xichen’s Moon-Viewing Party:

She can at least cow them into submission with Auntie Yu's beady-eyed stare: This is far from the only thing that Wei Ying has picked up from Auntie Yu. If anyone were ever to mention how like a real mother-and-daughter pair they can be sometimes, they would both be extremely appalled.

Lan Zhan has been watching Wei Ying since their arrival at his brother’s house to make sure that no one wrongs his wife (though with a credible amount of discretion, so no one else has picked up on anything beyond the boundaries of what is socially acceptable for a besotted husband). So while she has been busy noticing things going wrong, he has noticed her noticing things going wrong, and as soon as she starts taking action, he moves in to support her.

“Xiao Ping can go.” is the result of Lan Zhan finally finding an opportunity to step in after an extended period of patient waiting.

“Guanren,” she gasps in surprise: The possessive part of Lan Zhan (which is most of him) very much likes it when Wei Ying calls him that.

Lan Zhan discovers this night that he has a massive “bae helping other people” kink, and an equally massive competence kink.

At some point, Lan Zhan goes to his brother for advice on how to court his wife beyond his current “giving her things she likes” strategy, and receives the suggestion that maybe he should show her the things he’s good at too.

This births the “chrysanthemum wine + qin-playing” plan.

Continuing so late into the night that they fall asleep together is not an original part of this plan, but Wei Ying doesn’t seem upset by it and Lan Zhan is not one to retreat when he can advance, so it’s big wins all around.

Worth noting that while Lan Zhan does like his early bedtime in general, his particular insistence on xu shi (as noted by Wei Ying in re: “Her husband has revealed himself to be surprisingly fastidious about the strangest things as of late”) is not actually for health/moral habit reasons.

It also births the “Wei Ying [stumbling] across him in mid-song at an unusually high frequency” plan (which slightly predates the “chrysanthemum wine + qin-playing” plan).

And it is also why ultimate wingman Lan Xichen makes sure to mention poetry and Lan Zhan’s proficiency at it when he visits. It is very much not the only time he does something like this.

Other notes:

Which makes it even funnier that Lan Qiren so very obviously dislikes her: He does not, in fact, dislike her.

But he is experiencing trauma flashbacks from his interactions with Wei Ying’s mother back in ye day (/touches his beard protectively).

He is also burning with the passionate drive created by finally meeting a worthy challenge.

Every time one of his texts comes back annotated, he probably does the Tom-Hanks-Laptop meme of rubbing his hands and wiggling his fingers in preparation for writing his rebuttal. Except instead of "happy", his expression is "happily seething".

It bodes well for her ability to educate his nephew's children before they begin their formal education - if only he can get her to learn restraint and reform her character first!

So he is determined to succeed in fixing this one, this time! (He won’t).

Lan Xichen notices his uncle putting almost more energy into educating Wei Ying than his actual students and is highly amused.

Over time, Lan Qiren notices that verbally sparring with Wei Ying on various topics has improved the quality of his corresponding Academy lessons, and that he sometimes even discusses her takes on texts. This mildly infuriates him, especially when he receives expressions of admiration from students and parents for the depth of his scholarship and teaching.

Sometimes the result is that Lan Zhan gets a sudden and unexpected lecture on controlling/educating his wife and neither he nor Wei Ying can identify what she’s done to deserve it.

(Sometimes this is further complicated by the fact that she has committed too many potential affronts to pick just one.)

Uncoded notes have already been conclusively proven to be a terrible idea, and Wei Ying and Nie Huaisang do not already have an established code (Wei Ying cannot believe that they do not already have an established code; in reflection, it truly is an unforgivable oversight): They establish a code after everything in this story is finished, but they use it so infrequently that they keep forgetting it.

She would have loved to have used the opportunity to discuss Meng Yao instead, but when Wei Ying had mentioned her name, Nie Huaisang had simply hummed noncommittally and made no move to add anything further: Nie Huaisang’s initial reason for not involving Wei Ying in her own counterscheming against Meng Yao/Jin Guangshan is that Wei Ying has enough to deal with in re: the branch aunties and much fewer resources to draw on. This turns into “Wei Ying had better save her energy to focus on growing some emotional understanding of herself and her husband”, because that situation is dire. And then Meng Yao and Jin Guangshan escalate so far that it turns into “this is my personal grievance and requires my personal vengeance, and I will not risk having my bloodthirst restrained”.

Uncle Jiang had stopped him in the street and expressed his wife and daughter’s desire to see Wei Ying: A brief apology to Jiang Yanli who features very minimally in this story because while Wei Ying visits her a lot, she is also taking pains to stop her beloved sister from unnecessarily worrying about her by not mentioning anything serious at all and painting a very rosy picture of her married life where she “only has your run-of-the-mill teething problems, hardly worth talking about, except could you do me this one favour and send this wad of joss paper over to my residence in your name?”.

Jiang Yanli politely keeps up her end of the social fiction but is, in fact, still worrying. She deals with this by making and sending over a lot of nourishing food.

Wei Ying pulls the bundle out from a drawer and is struck by a sudden and completely uncharacteristic wave of self-doubt. This is odd and completely inexplicable - she’d been so confident in the quality of her gift only a shichen prior; she has no idea why she feels so nervous about it now: This is the point at which any other person might notice that their feelings for their husband run deeper than they’d previously thought (if they hadn’t already realised at many points before this), but Wei Ying is special. Lan Zhan, unfortunately, manages to pick up on the “any other person” part, but not the “Wei Ying is special” part.

There’s a sudden clatter, followed by Xiao Ping swearing and they startle apart: This is deliberate on Xiao Ping’s part. There are branch spies watching!

On Scheming Abilities:

Nie Mingjue, as the eldest di-daughter of a wealthy household who has only ever been second to her parents in terms of authority, has never needed to scheme in her life, and is used to dealing with everything straightforwardly. After she marries, Lan Xichen doesn’t have concubines and Nie Mingjue is too wealthy/powerful for the Lan relatives to otherwise interfere with her, so she never has to change (and is therefore completely unprepared for Meng Yao).

Similarly, Lan Xichen has zero scheming skills (although he will need to acquire some to survive in government, probably)

Lan Zhan has acquired more skills than his brother, by way of greater involvement in the family business and having to deal with the branch families. His involvement with Wei Ying, however, is fast teaching him that he is also very much a novice.

Nie Huaisang, a shu-daughter (although I never managed to explicitly say that anywhere in the text) and Wei Ying, a servant-born foster daughter, have acquired scheming skills due to the precariousness of those positions in life. These include:

Being targeted by and winning power games against people within the household

For Nie Huaisang, perhaps her father’s concubines or the servants loyal to them - either as a way to get to Nie Mingjue, or just directly.

For Wei Ying, maybe some of Madam Yu’s close maids feel aggrieved on their mistress’s behalf, maybe some of the servants resent Wei Ying for having a better position despite being equal to them in terms of birth.

Winning power games against people in their social circles who look down on them (Nie Huaisang for being a shu daughter, Wei Ying for being servant-born).

Needing to scheme their way out of feminine hooligan-related scrapes from their youth, of which there were many.

CHAPTER 6

Can’t find much to say about this chapter. Just that:

Treating Wei Ying to almost half a shichen of her own lecture on the importance of rewarding loyalty to old servants: Wei Ying remembers this with great clarity during the confrontation and associated fall-out (“Loyal people are difficult to come by; I would hate to deprive them of such a precious resource.”).

Miss Cang had been diligently using those accomplishments to slowly and subtly appeal to the similarly-accomplished Lan Zhan not one year ago: On the other hand, Lan Zhan could not pick her out of a lineup if his life depended on it. Wei Ying asks him after the first time she and Miss Cang have a run-in and receives a very genuine response of “???” “????????????” She chooses not to mention that to Miss Cang either.

CHAPTER 7

Lan Zhan received a bit of abuse in the comments of this chapter (:’D), which came as a bit of a surprise to me. I suppose I have the benefit of clearly plotting out my son’s perspective for my own understanding of the story, and Wei Ying’s perspective limits the ways in which his side of the story can be conveyed, so that’s what I’ll address.

Lan Zhan is not angry, his feelings are hurt.

He's invested 110% in this relationship and he'd thought Wei Ying felt the same until she hit him with the joke about divorce, and now it's like "she's built herself an exit strategy, is standing with one foot out the door and none of my feelings or actions-to-date have mattered enough to outweigh that".

For any Legend of Minglan viewers, the parallel with Gu Tingye’s “You’re leaving yourself an escape route!!�� is very much intentional.

You can see a bit of this hinted at in Lan Zhan’s “You don’t even know”, which indicates that all of Wei Ying’s theories on what she has done are wrong.

While Lan Zhan is particularly sensitive about divorce for some understandable mother-related reasons (which means that there's an additional "how could she think that of me? does she know me at all?" in there), he has an additional contextual defence: most women would not joke about divorce, at least before the marital relationship is solid enough that everyone knows it’s obviously a joke.

Meanwhile, Wei Ying has thrown the joke out there on the back of some solid evidence that she has some real viable alternatives for supporting herself, so for all Lan Zhan knows, she might actually go.

Given his limited emotional-management tools, Lan Zhan is working it out in the best way he knows how:

Firstly going to see his brother

Secondly by hiding away and nursing his wounds while he awkwardly tries to process his feelings, calms down, takes stock of the situation and decides what he wants to do about it.

He can't actually come out and say "I'M UPSET BECAUSE YOU DON'T LOVE ME!", hence: making his brother promise not to tell her, and his brother agreeing because lol yes that's quite embarrassing.

So we can see in: “But her efforts are only met with her brother-in-law - while smiling in a way that seems as if he’s laughing at her even more than usual - simply telling her not to worry, and that his brother’s anger will doubtlessly burn itself out any day now“ that:

Firstly, the problem is something that Lan Xichen can be amused about. We’ve already mentioned the embarrassment factor, but beyond that, the nature of the problem is not that serious. Lan Zhan in the throes of heartbreak is melodramatically thinking “SHE DOESN’T LOVE ME”, but Lan Xichen is astute enough to suspect that Wei Ying is maybe a bit emotionally dense, and is probably not as unmoved as all that.

Secondly, Lan Xichen recognises that the problem is something that Lan Zhan needs space to work through himself, and that there’s nothing to be done on Wei Ying’s side.

Mianmian’s “refusal to tell Wei Ying” is explained in Ch 8, but it’s worth noting here that loyal maidservant Mianmian would never refuse to tell Wei Ying something important. What actually happens of course is that Mianmian keeps insisting that Lan Zhan is in love with Wei Ying, and Wei Ying keeps refusing to believe it and then she finally says “Fine! Don’t tell me then!” and Mianmian is like /o\

Susu genuinely doesn’t know though, lol. She’s a bit younger, not as emotionally mature.

Nie Mingjue also genuinely doesn’t know (Lan Xichen hasn’t told her because he knows she’d just call Lan Zhan an idiot to his face).

Nie Huaisang does know, but after hearing about Mianmian’s valiant attempts, she decides it would be better to take a more slowly-slowly angle and show Wei Ying how much Lan Zhan likes her instead. With mixed results.

Even given all the above, Lan Zhan is very much invested in protecting Wei Ying’s public standing and reputation:

We can see this in his insistence that she stays at home, so she doesn’t become a convenient target or sacrificial fall-guy  during the family proceedings.

Nie Mingjue further explains his fears in her conversation with Wei Ying about the Lan elders and their treatment of Lan Zhan’s mother vs herself.

We can also see it in “While he does not ignore her, precisely, Lan Zhan also never lingers in her company a moment longer than strict decorum would require”: Lan Zhan is still demonstrating to the servants and the public that, at the very least, her position as his wife should be respected and all related benefits afforded to her.

And of course he’s still sleeping in their bedroom.

Both the Lan brothers underestimate the emotional impact that this will have on Wei Ying, because neither of them has correctly understood how emotionally invested she is or how emotionally invested she realises she is. (In their defence: neither has she.)

This assumption is shored up by the way that she stays pretty upbeat and flippant, especially in the way she goes about trying to make amends. Not yet understanding her, they take this to mean that she’s feeling sorry and a little awkward, but otherwise is unaffected.

Lan Zhan’s points of realisation that he's hurt her are "Forgive me anyway - I can't bear it" and finding her curled up in bed. “I have an engagement” is true, but it is also him needing some space to process this new knowledge. At this point he:

half-caves to the decision that he'll just love her anyway and not give her any excuse to leave, and

half-comes to the realisation that actually, maybe Wei Ying really doesn't know about his feelings or her own, so he's going to need to recalibrate.

There were a few comments along the lines of “this could have been resolved through direct communication”, and while that’s true to some extent, I feel like direct communication in the context of relationships and feelings is a very modern-Western value that doesn’t necessarily have the same application here.

I do fully accept that despite its setting, this is a modern story, for a modern audience. But even so I think the non-modern setting and context (in addition to Lan Zhan’s particular personal situation) make it a little unfair to blame Lan Zhan for not starting a heart-to-heart outpouring of feelings. (Though of course this is my personal opinion.)

Even in my modern-but-still-Asian family, there’s a much stronger culture of being expected to read unspoken meaning from social situations, and in turn being able to expect that other people do the same. The cultural conflict is, as Jay Chou once sang in the song “Cliff of Love” (lololololol): You say that I am like a child, delighting in always leaving you guessing. I say that you’re the one who is like a child, always needing me to spell things out for you.

Semi-relatedly, I think there’s a “child of asian parents” meme about your parents apologising by bringing sliced fruit to you instead of saying anything with words. I have imputed this to Wei Ying and Lan Zhan.

In very general terms, I would also say that we as a Chinese family have a much weaker culture of “you did this thing that violates my boundaries, I will tell you and expect you to change your behaviour” and a much stronger culture of “you did this thing to violate my boundaries, I must manage myself so that unacceptable boundary violations do not happen in future”. I have on some level imputed this to Lan Zhan.

There is also a much stronger culture of avoiding things that are embarrassing (as the person who might be embarrassed, as the person who might cause someone else to be embarrassed, and as a bystander who might worsen the embarrassment by bearing witness). There’s a lot of “not mentioning and just moving past these things by unspoken agreement”. I have on some level imputed this to … everyone in this story. 

The entire story, but this sex scene in particular, have been my manifesto on My Beef with Historical CNovels (which I recognise is sometimes about censorship and not the authors’ artistic vision). In terms of the sex scene this includes, but is not limited to:

Only the dudes or top dudes being horny or up for it (or being the 80 in an 80/20 split in who is horny/up for it)!

The relative passivity of ladies/bottom dudes in bed!

JADE STICKS (didn’t manage to get a reference to CHERRY NIPPLES in, but THOSE TOO)!

Lack of preparation and the resultant pain!

The lady/bottom “not being able to get out of bed for 3 days afterwards”!

The fun relationship tension/dynamics disappearing after a pivotal point where the couple variously gets together/gets married/has sex!

CHAPTER 8

Without guidance from questions in the comments, some general notes:

“It matters not,” he murmurs when they break apart: This is Lan Zhan both recognising that Wei Ying is not mentally/emotionally ready to believe the actual answer, and also genuinely meaning that it doesn’t matter anymore.

It’s also probably quite obvious right now that this Lan Zhan knows he’s not very verbally demonstrative and so he compensates with physical affection instead.

This also means that he’s very cuddly with their children when they’re born, and 100% takes A-Yuan everywhere with him, including on business.

While Lan Zhan directs her from his place behind her, seated with his chest pressed flush against her back: Lan Zhan would have been one of those children who is independent and standoffish in public, but a total cuddlebug with his mum in private. And so in addition to the above, the result of being touch-starved for over a decade following his mother’s death means that he fuses himself to Wei Ying at every (private) opportunity. It’s not that he doesn’t touch her in public, but it’s all very hand-on-elbow proper and decorous - until the moment they cross into a place with any amount of privacy and then FWOOM.

Wei Ying has wondered more than once whether she might one day bully Lan Zhan into sitting in the circle of her arm, while she appreciates fine wine as the ancestors intended: It definitely happens, and takes minimal-to-none bullying.

If her friend is suspicious enough of Meng Yao to interfere in her sister’s household, limit Meng Yao’s access to Nie Mingjue and attack Meng Yao’s father, then why has she done nothing to Meng Yao herself?: Nie Huaisang started out leaving Meng Yao every opportunity to come clean about what Jin Guangshan wanted her to do. If Meng Yao had had a change of heart and done this at any point while her disruptions to the household were still minor, Nie Huaisang would have happily worked with her to get her due from the Jin family (and then relocated her to somewhere suitably removed from Lan Xichen). But then Meng Yao proves that she is willing to completely sell Nie Mingjue out for her own gain, and now Nie Huaisang is giving her enough rope to hang herself.

And so Wei Ying spends the latter part of the evening half-lying on Lan Zhan’s bare chest: This behaviour begins as the result of Wei Ying misunderstanding something she hears (probably from Uncle Jiang’s men) about post-nut clarity. But it is in Lan Zhan’s interests to encourage it, and it doesn’t actually impede the thought process, so it continues.

“I didn’t mean to,” Nie Huaisang says in a small voice, to no one in particular: Going to leave this open as to whether Nie Huaisang is telling the truth or not.

The coroner’s report will attribute the cause to a combination of the incense burning in the room and the herbal tonic that he has been taking to replenish his yang qi for the past year: Meng Yao’s last gift to a father she has known all along was using her too.

[snickerdoodlles]

📒📓📔📕???? Pretty please :3

❤❤!

sometimes @majestictortoise and i toss around story ideas that are less plot and more of us just chucking our favorite things in the communal soup pot and letting them stew. case in point:

Kim and Porsche meet first AU! 🥳

Porsche rescues Kim from mafia thugs

why does Kim need rescuing? unimportant! what matters is Porsche sees a nong in need and rushes to his rescue. Kinn-shaped people get charged 50k baht for his assistance, Kim-shaped people get help whether they like it or not. and afterwards Kim, who's father taught him that everything has a cost and how to keep a mental ledger of favors and debts, tries to pay Porsche off for the help.

Porsche, who's 'tips' have always been for sex work, sees the wad of cash and goes "you want a post-fight fuck????"

Kim, an awkward turtle-duck, bolts away like ???nO????!!!!!!

Kim hires Porsche as a bodyguard

how did we get from "hire me for sex?" to "hire me for protection?" unimportant! what matters is Kim secures Porsche for himself and Porsche thinks "how hard can guarding one moderately popular youtube star be?" and the raccoon shenanigans that ensue. and, of course, Kim finding the connection between their families and investigating his own hire. then 2 days later, because Kim doesn't have a crush to draw out the investigation and Porsche couldn't do subterfuge to save his life, Kim confronts Porsche with his evidence and Porsche goes "what the FUCK do you mean our families are CONNECTED?!" and these two going full gremlin investigator mode together.

Porsche brings Kim home

when exactly does this happen? unimportant! what matters is Porsche and Kim smuggle themselves into the neighborhood late at night, which results in Chay looking up from playing a videogame or doing homework or whatever to see his brother standing there with ✨Wik✨ in his own living room and his first response is "why'd you bring me my favorite musician" because clearly that is the only reason why his beloved older brother, who keeps trying to give him the moon and stars even though he didn't ask for them, would bring home Wik. also;

Chay: *thinks about his idol wall one floor above* Kim: *stares at cute boy* Porsche: i see i'm not needed here

Chay learns Porsche is mafia

how exactly does this come up? unimportant! what matters is:

"he's mafia" "i don't care that Kim's mafia, why are YOU mafia hia!!!!" "...i'll just uh... be over..... there......." Kim says to no one before awkwardly shuffling himself off to a corner.

naturally, this is when Kinn decides to show up

why does he choose now to stop by? because older brother instincts drive you to always be the most annoying person in the room, next. Kim hired a guard out of nowhere without telling Kinn or Papa and the guy's stayed on for longer than 24 hours, Kinn is suspicious as shit and worried as hell. he's been keeping it under wraps, but Kim and Porsche trying to fly under the radar right now gives him a good opportunity to investigate. and lo and behold, Kim appears to have made two new friends, one of whom keeps making him blush and the other who's the prettiest man Kinn's ever seen. Kinn is absolutely not just leaving Kim, he wants to know everything 👀

Kinn, Porsche, Kim, and Chay get snatched ala ep5

why are they kidnapped? unimportant! we do not question kidnapping plots in this household. Kinn, Porsche, Kim, and Chay all escape into the jungle but get separated. Kinn and Porsche have a journey not unlike ep6, except with more yelling, more bickering, and more trolling. Porsche's view of Kinn is colored by Kim not the guards here and then his main introduction is in the jungle not the compound, so he's charmed pretty quickly and judging himself for it every time Kinn falls back on his asshole training. Kinn's main introduction to Porsche is a caring guy who's also a troll and won't hesitate to punch him in the dick when he's being a jerk so...not too much changed there, actually. they are still handcuffed together.

Kim and Chay are having a nice time. bonding over music, trading stories about brothers, asking questions so that they can unravel Korn's 15 year long conspiracy--it's basically a scenic date. they are not handcuffed together because Kim carries three lockpick sets minimum at all times and was out of the handcuffs before they were even out of the truck. Kim and Chay are just holding hands, because Chay asked Kim to hold his hand, and Kim grabbed it saying it's the best way to ensure they aren't separated, and Chay responded "that's nice, but i asked because i want to hold your hand," and Kim blushed bright red. nerds.

the four of them reunite...eventually, idk when, but the first thing Chay does when he sees Porsche across the ravine is holler "DID YOU REALLY THINK KIM WAS PAYING YOU FOR SEX HIA" and Kinn's head snaps around so fast Kim and Porsche get secondhand whiplash.

Korn dies

how does this happen? unimportant! but he's dead before the fic ends.

[[ fics im not writing ]]

[changingplumbob]

York Household: Chapter 9, Part 7

Deanna expresses her feelings while Joey tries to be supportive. Kelly does not try to be supportive.

The Yorks are Italian so if you see them using words that don't look like English it's Italian, or what google assures me is Italian. Caro/Cara: Dear Buongiorno: Good morning Piccolo: Little one Tesoro: Treasure Nonno: Grandfather Nonna: Grandmother Si: Yes Grazie: Thank you Per Favore: Please Buon Compleanno: Happy Birthday

Deanna moves inside forlornly, hardly looking where she’s going. She feels sadness and anger swirling inside her.

Joey: Come here sis

Deanna: Joey?

Joey: Pa thought I should stay. He’s gone to buy cheese

Deanna goes and throws her arms around her big brother, hugging him close. Thank the watcher for her family. The tears in her eyes flow freely now and she couldn't say how long she stood there sobbing into Joey's jacket. Eventually she manages to slow down the sobs to speak.

Deanna: I just got dumped *sadly* I didn’t see it coming

Joey: Come and sit, we can talk

Deanna: No. I need to block that… I need to block my ex. She’s left, she doesn’t get the luxury of seeing my life anymore

Joey: I mean… straight to block? I thought you loved her

Deanna: I do! I mean I did *sighs* it’s complicated Joey

Joey: Thank the watcher I don’t get romantic feelings

Deanna: I’m sorry, if that's you trying to be helpful I'd rather face it alone

Joey: I just wonder, if you loved her, why aren’t you fighting for her

Deanna: She thinks I loved what she was more than who she was

Joey: What does that mean

Deanna: Nevermind. She was wrong

After Kelly has stayed on the second floor patio long enough to see Paris fade into the distance he goes to join his siblings in waiting for dinner.

Kelly: Woah you look terrible

Deanna: Shut up goblin, I’m not in the mood

Kelly: I thought saying you’ve looked better was a compliment for all those other times you didn’t look like this

Deanna: It isn’t and you know that

Kelly: Hey Joey, are you coming to my birthday party tomorrow

Joey: Am I invited

Kelly: You’re my brother, of course you’re invited. I’m evil but family get a special pass

Deanna: You literally insult me daily

Kelly: Do I? Or do I prepare you for the harshness of the world

Deanna: Look, I just got dumped, I’m not in the mood for your mind games

Kelly: Good riddance. She was clearly a peasant

Deanna: Look, you may be too young to understand-

Kelly: I’m 13 tomorrow

Deanna: Whatever. Point is if you love someone it’s hard to lose them

Kelly: But… she… was… a PEASANT. Sooner you accept that the happier you’ll be

Joey: That kind of made sense

Deanna: *scoffs* Don’t encourage him Joey

The oven needed a quick scrub but Aaron manages to cook some excellent level Mac and Cheese.

Kelly: YES! De you should get dumped more so we get greasy food

Deanna: *sighs* Pass me a plate then troll

Joey: Home is where the good pasta is. Grazie pa

Aaron: You’re welcome

Deanna: Grazie pa *sadly moves food about*

Aaron: You’re welcome *long silence* Kelly?

Kelly: Si pa?

Aaron: Do you have something to say

Kelly: Si... Wombats poop squares

Aaron: Do they now

Kelly: Si

*phone noise*

Aaron: Joey, it’s still no phones at the table

Joey: But I’m running some tests on my mini game. It’s like blicblock, but forget everything you know about blicblock

Aaron: Do you think the main game will be ready for release soon

Joey: I hope so but I’m trying to grind at work so I’ve only got pockets of time. Plus Alfred and Rilian like to show me their toys. I want it polished before I release it, start strong

Before everyone is finished eating Calista gets home from her shift.

Calista: I do love mac and cheese

Deanna: Mama… Paris left

Calista: I’m so sorry cara (Aaron has already text her a heads up of the situation so she’s not caught off guard)

Deanna: And she accused me of not loving her. Can you believe that?

Calista: So she said “it’s not me it’s you”

Deanna: Not exactly. She kept going on about wanting to find herself and needing to go out into the world. I offered to keep in touch but… she didn’t want that. She didn’t want me

Kelly: She was a peasant *leaves table without being excused* I vote for the watcher to delete her

Deanna: *sadly* What am I meant to do now

Joey: Whatever you feel like. Have a day of mourning if you want. Eat ice cream and drink nectar and watch films until you cry. Then tomorrow, after a good night’s sleep, you dust yourself off and carry on. You understand robotics De, don’t let this mess up your study because I think you could be a pioneer one day

Deanna: You really think that?

Joey: Of course I do. And you have to listen to me, because I’m a genius

Deanna tucks into the last of her food with the most energy she’s had all meal while Calista mouths grazie to Joey.

When the table is free Kelly grabs out his trusty diary. There’s the normal entry start, who’s on his hitlist today and why. Then comes a more thoughtful paragraph wondering about teen life. Will it be what he expects? Will he be what he expects? Will people treat him differently? Can he still keep the evil mantle with more personality? At least Mantis is immortal and can never leave.

Deanna is lounging in her cottage with the comedy channel on but she's paying it no attention. She's scrolling through photos on her phone when a familiar sim bursts through her door.

Devin: De! Joey told me what happened! Come here

The two kiss on the cheek and hug. Even though Devin has already heard the story she lets Deanna tell it again to get it off her chest.

Devin: Oh my! Clearly we need to make some changes

Deanna: What do you mean

Devin: *gently* Cara you are not going to heal with photos of the two of you in your face

Deanna: But *sniffles* she’s in most of my friend photos

Devin: Come to your room, I’ll work my style magic on your walls

Devin: There. Now she’s not in your room. The friend photos with her are not where you’ll be trying to sleep

Deanna: Thanks Devin

Devin: Of course. Now sleep, tomorrow after classes we’re going shopping

Deanna: But I hate shopping

Devin: I know but I used my status as favourite to convince the watcher she needs to change your skintone to fit the rest of us, may as well get a style over. Nothing says I’m newly single like changing your hair

Previous ... Next

[albentelisa]

Hi! Here's an interesting ask. What if Douxie had met and eventually adopted by Barbara a few years before the events of Season One happen?

Barabra and Jim are both aware of the supernatural during season one due to them finding out Douxie is a wizard. As to how Jim and Douxie both claim: "it was Archie's fault" when Claire asks the same question when she learns.

So, I'd say that Douxie gets in trouble with some witches who have a personal vendetta against Merlin. He uses a de-aging potion to escape them, turning into a twelve-year-old kid. Initial Douxie's plan is to hide for a while, using a potion until the witches leave Arcadia. He also uses a foster care system to throw them off his tracks.

One day, Douxie gets injured and taken to the hospital where he meets Barbara for the first time. Barbara takes a liking to this kid, and after some consideration, decides to adopt him.

That is how Jim gets an elder brother when he is ten. Both Jim and Barbara start to consider Douxie their real family fast enough.

Douxie feels slightly conflicted about the development - while being in an actual family will clearly cover his tracks better, he realizes how much he starts caring about Barbara and Jim. So Douxie's decision is to continue with de-aging until he reaches his actual age of 19 while keeping the magic part secret.

The latter one is where he fails spectacularly because of Archie who isn't able to tolerate being treated as a silly cat for long and loses it one day when Toby tries to babytalk to him. So, Toby, Jim, and Barbara who are present, learn that Archie isn't a cat at all, and Douxie decides it'll be fair to tell them everything fully expecting that Barbara might throw him out after his confession. However, the truth actually makes their bonds tighter. It's such a relief for everyone as Barbara has always felt her adopted son hid something, not to mention that Douxie doesn't need to pretend to be a kid all the time (and Archie is the happiest for finally being treated with some respect).

Initially, Barbara is worried about Douxie's occasional monster hunts, but as he proves his competence, she lets him go. However, she strictly prohibits Jim and Toby from joining - and Douxie supports this decision as he's aware of how dangerous are his outings. Not that the boys agree with that as they keep sneaking out and following Douxie. It ends up with Douxie teaching them how to deal with various types of creatures as he realizes that Jim and Toby will continue anyway, and it will be better to ensure that they will at least know how to defend themselves.

Not that Jim is content with only that. He wishes to have a true adventure, not just warding off some goblins. At some point, he even tries to learn magic, but unfortunately for him, he has no aptitude for it.

Everything changes when Jim picks up the amulet. He (and Toby) know straight away that the amulet is magic, but cannot tell what exactly it is. When Jim is back home, he asks Douxie about it right away - and Douxie doesn't take it well because he 1)knows what it is and 2) knows that Jim cannot refuse the mantle. Merlin ordered Douxie not to get involved with the Trollhunters until Merlin contacts him, but it's not like Douxie can ignore his little brother getting into a dangerous situation.

Blinky and Aaarrrgghh come right amid Douxie's explanation about the amulet. Jim isn't that shocked or scared to see them as he knows about trolls' existence. He's also rather excited to finally get his adventure. Besides, Douxie is on his team too.

Initially, Jim hopes to keep everything from Barbara as he doesn't want to trouble her more. She finds out the next day though as trolls barge in openly (they are sure that everyone in the Lakes' household knows about magic, so see no problem, and Jim has forgotten to mention it to them to keep his mom in the dark).

So, in this AU Jim has support from both his mom and elder brother. It changes some things:

Barbara is initially worried sick about Jim risking his life and only calms down a bit once Douxie promises her that he'll make sure that no one is hurt;

Barbara is a team medic and frequent to the Trollmarket. She still has a relationship with Strickler as no one has been aware that Strickler is a changeling for a while;

Douxie provides some information about different magical creatures and the amulet;

Douxie also helps Jim with dating advice (though, Jim is still awkward when it comes to Claire);

once Jim learns that Strickler is a changeling, he is reluctant to tell it to Barbara. Keeping it secret leads to Barbara falling under the binding spell of Angor Rot. She learns the truth soon afterward, but the damage is already done;

Douxie starts teaching Claire magic once she gets a shadow staff, however, Claire has been interested in magic since joining the team

[iowriteswords]

Io's Writing List, June 2024

1. When Pinioned Birds Take Flight - finished, last few chapters posting on AO3 over next few weeks

(Their dad is dead. Their brother is gone. All three of them are fugitives. Is now a good time to adopt two zombie children? No. Will that stop them? No.)

2. Untitled BATB retelling - in progress, currently being shared for free on Patreon

(He's not looking for a way out of the curse. He's just trying to help the girl he found crying in the woods. The curse protects him; he doesn't want it broken. But he does want Mira to love him, and he can't have one without the other.)

3. Take Off Your Happy Face - in  progress, will start posting on AO3 in the fall

(With Batman and the Joker dead, Harley takes Robin and runs. She doesn't know how to be a mother; she barely knows how to be an adult. But she's all he has, so she'll have to figure it out.)

4. When the War Ends - in progress, will be published in 2025 or 2026

(Nine years ago, Eloise's lover betrayed her, launching their kingdom into a three way war. Now, Eloise has been kidnapped, and her captor has offered a way to end the war. But can she trust the future of her country to a man who's hurt her so much?)

5. Ozma: the Boy Queen - in progress, earlier drafts of first 2 parts on AO3

("Rescued" from his mother and unwillingly restored to his original form, Tip is made queen of Oz. Unable to return to his old life or his old body, he--she?--works with what he has. At least Dorothy is cool.)

6. Talon!Cass - in progress, title pending

(Sandra Woosan takes in her daughter from an alternate universe. She has zero experience with children. Her daughter is a zombified assassin who can't speak or understand any language Sandra knows. What could possibly go wrong?)

7. Talon!Steph - in progress, title pending

(A Talonized Stephanie Brown joins Oracle, Huntress, and Black Canary in New Gotham. Set in the world of the 2002 Birds of Prey TV show.)

8. Talon!Carrie - in progress, title pending

(Martha's baby is dead, and her sanity is shaky at best. Thomas is seriously considering a future in vigilante justice. Alfred only took this job as a favor to his father, and he thought he would be managing a household, not babysitting adults. A brainwashed teenager can't possibly improve this situation, but, well. She's here now.)

9. The Talon and the Clown - in progress, title pending

(Duela and Talon are home with their parents. Owlman is dead, and Gotham is healing. But Talon's been through twenty years of brainwashing and torture, and recovery isn't easy.)

10. The Sun and the Moon - upcoming

(Siri sells herself to a talking bear to save her starving family. When she learns that her best friend and fellow prisoner Mikkel is actually the bear in another form, she wants to be angry, but she'll have to rescue him from his evil troll stepmother before she can yell at him.)

11. Flightless Birds part 4 - upcoming, title pending

(A speedster and an alien arrive. A junior superhero team forms. Secret identities are revealed. Tim and Jason reconnect with their families.)

12. Silence - upcoming/in progress

(Unexpectedly deprived of fins and gills, a mermaid learns to be human.)

[trollex-is-gay]

also flyod low key acting like a therapist/life coach for veerner was funny in 2 different ways.

Because 1. The man's got parent/big brother energy and was low key gentle parenting the two Betty spaghetti teens during his imprisonment

2. Said teenagers almost kill him and in some frame the man looked sad for their dramatic selfs. 100 percent after getting some of his own therapy and reconnecting with his siblings the man is gonna visit them in jail or something to check in on em.

I honestly kind feel bad for Velvet and Venner (And I say both of them for reasons I will elaborate on in this answer) because like. They did do some INCREDIBLY awful shit and they definitely should not have kidnapped and nearly killed Floyd just to get famous, but also they're teenagers. And I am very convinced that Velvet is not just like that to be like that. Sorry for the incoming rant but the fandom has NOT been giving Velvet any proper attention for the most part so I gotta step up to the plate for my girl. They imply that the two had decent parents and a very nice household to grow up in, but even then, Velvet could've been affected by some outside force. Or even an inside force! It could be a mental thing that has affected her, but it went completely unchecked because everyone assumed she was just an overemotional brat and her brother didn't want to stand up to anything she was doing or saying. NOW, of course that doesn't make a single thing she did okay, nothing of what she did was okay at all. I don't want anyone to think I'm excusing her actions. Especially not how she treated her brother. But what I'm saying is that there's maybe a reason for her behavior, because I don't think she's some fully evil person. She did include Veneer in the being famous act and gave him pretty much everything she got, so it seems like some tiny part of her still cared about him. She does need punishment for her actions (and so does Veneer, come on people he contributed no matter how sweet he is) and definitely needs to face what she did, but I'd hope they aren't giving the siblings a life sentence or something because what they did wasn't that far off from what the bergens were doing. Those guys were straight up eating trolls to get happy, and the trolls became cool with them eventually. I do like the idea of Floyd visiting the two. He's not over what they did (who would be?) but he has a connection with Veneer and when she'd finally calmed down and they'd gotten a grasp on whatever the heck made her act that way, I'd like to believe that Floyd would try and made a connection with Velvet. Maybe talk through some feelings during their very brief prison visits. He recognizes that they're still teenagers, they did horrible stuff, Velvet especially, but she's still an emotionally unstable teenager who needs some kind of help, and Veneer could use some of that help too. I mean they don't mention their parents beyond Veneer's one-off comment about their childhood, for all we know their parents could be out of the picture and these two are living on their own. Who's to say anyone was checking in on how they were doing when they weren't putting on fronts in public?

[kawaiichaoscrusade]

Ties From the Forest Grave

A Grave Ties Crossover

Written by SlayerMaya175

Inspired by @elainaashfith07 's "Monster of the Forest"

Chapter 1: A Perilous First Meeting

Branch was having a nice and relaxing day in the woods. A while ago, his grandmother Rosiepuff had asked him and his brothers to gather some sticks for the bunker, which they obeyed because in their household/secret hideout, no one disobeys their elder. Although she had planned on making something very special for dinner once everyone got every stick they could find, John thought it would be a good idea for all five of them to split up further away from their home so they could find sticks much faster before dinner which they all did.

Branch unfortunately had wandered farther away from the safe radius of their home while getting the sticks but when the light had gotten pretty dark, he stopped in his tracks, looked up and saw that he was no longer in the safe part of the woods anymore, instead he was in the forbidden part known as The Dark Abyss.

This part is rumored to be home to various creatures who the villagers are very afraid of, from dark sprites, ghosts, demons, and various creatures of the supernatural, Rosiepuff had told the boys numerous stories about this evil forbidden part of the forest, its creature residents and what happens to trolls who disobeyed the rules of their elders to not venture into the Dark Abyss.

Especially the graphically violent consequences of said disobedience…sweet troll, that woman can describe the most horrific ways of getting mauled alive by a wild animal, in front of five clearly isolated and sheltered trolls. She definitely needs to see a professional, that's what he always thought everytime she finishes her stories/warnings.

But anyway, he kept going into the dark abyss, collecting as many sticks as he could before the sun set, but little did he know that someone..or something was watching him..tracking his movements..and getting ready to follow this poor naive troll.

Meanwhile in another part of the dark abyss, a strange wormhole appeared in midair and spit out a strange creature who looked like a troll, an eerily familiar troll. Its fur was a gray color, their hair was jet black, their outfit was very similar to the one troll who is currently collecting sticks and being stalked by a hungry predator : Branch and yet there was something very off about this alternate branch, he had some sort of a feline look on him but why is that? Well it was because he is actually a monstrous creature known as a werecat.

But how did he become a werecat? Unfortunately he was 10 years old when he was attacked by a werecat who he had no idea that it was his nemesis, Creek at the time and he has been like this ever since, the only one troll who knows about his condition is Princess Poppy who keeps his curse a secret in return uses his territory as an space to let her negative emotions out and become gray, only Branch is the one who knows about this.

“Agh…what the..” he groaned as he got up and shook himself to get some of the debris off of his fur and hair. He then noticed that he was in an very unfamiliar, strange and mystical-like part of the woods, there was strange bushes, its flowers providing a light in the darkness, vines with thorns were wrapped around the trees, there was also a low misty fog covering the ground where nothing can be seen and finally, there was a strange ambience in this dark forest, it was almost like a dark fairytale-equse lullaby can be faintly heard around him.

He knew that he wasn't in his territory anymore, this is an entirely different world from what he knew, and he knew everything about the woods. There are new scents he can smell from where he was standing, he couldn't recognize any of them..it was so strange, odd and..magical? That might be the right word if he was crazy..he then decided to go off to explore this place and figure out a plan from there but little did he know is that he will be meeting plus saving a certain troll from an animal attack and not only end up with a new friend but also..a son.

Back with our stitched up protagonist, he was almost done with picking as many sticks as he could. It was almost like it was a competition and he was trying to win this thing. DANG YOU JOHN FOR MAKING THIS WHOLE TASK INTO A STUPID COMPETITION!! he was so gonna beat him up once he gets home..but he couldn't because John's his older brother and he loves his family enough to never hurt him..that's what being sheltered as a family does to you..you have to appreciate the time you have with your family..otherwise, they will disappear and will never return..AND IT WILL BE ALL YOUR FAULT THAT THEY LEFT AND YOU RUINED EVERYTHING…he starts to think that he may need therapy as well.

Suddenly, he heard a faint growling noise from out of nowhere, he stopped in his tracks, still holding the sticks close to his chest like it was his life support and he looked around his surroundings to find the source of the sound. This place is called the dark abyss for a reason, it's a graveyard for idiotic trolls who wandered far away from the safety of the troll village, never heeding the warnings from their elders and vanishing without a trace, never to be seen again, you will be a distant memory forever.

The growling grew louder, louder, louder and LOUDER by the hour, Branch was trying to remain calm, stand still and praying that this noise is just part of his imagination and not real, he then decided to drop his bundle of sticks and take out two wooden stakes as his choice of defenses, he may have his crossbow and his two daggers but he honestly has no idea what kind of creature he was facing…is it a vampire? Is it a basilisk? Is it a banshee? Is it a goblin? Is it a werebeast? Or is it a bergen?? He honestly doesn't know what is out there and that's what scares him the most..

then he decides to do something that may get him completely killed: he yells out, “HELLO!? IS SOMEONE HERE!?” out to the darkness, the only sound that responded to his call was some birds that flew out, spooked by his yelling, some critters that heard him but decided to ignore him and that growling noise from before is still there.

He welded his two stakes, surveying his surroundings, his eyes were also narrowed as he was trying to see what creature is out there, but in a nearby bush, the werecat troll was hiding and also surveying this strange stitched up troll that looks just like him.

His colors is gray but with blue discoloration, there are also some stitches all over its body, the hair was a dark blue with white marks, its ears were slightly torn with one stitching on the left ear, it was wearing the same clothes as he was and finally, its eyes were two unnaturally shades of blue where he swore to himself that he saw them glowing in the dark. But the most damning piece of evidence was the fact that its clothes were exactly like his own outfit.

What happened to this poor unfortunate troll and why does he look like me? Is all he can think of as he kept an eye on this troll. But suddenly he sniffed the air, realizing that this troll is not alone, there was something else besides him in this forest.

It was another predator..more dangerous than he is, and it was hungry..hungry for an easy meal, and this troll is unfortunately on the menu if he doesn't do something..but he can't risk it, he doesn't know him, and the troll might hurt him with his weapons..he'll just have to wait to see if this troll needs help.

Branch, armed with his trusty wooden stakes, surveys his surroundings to see if there's something watching him for this part of the woods is his territory and he, his brothers and grandma all know it by heart from the numerous trips they would go on to collect items, document unordinary plants and animal species that hadn't been discovered yet, and also set traps for those that are a threat to troll kind, he should definitely feel at home in the dark abyss.

And yet..sometimes..he feels completely alone and scared in this place. His brothers and grandma are not here to protect him from the evilness of the dark abyss, and all he has in his possession are three measly sticks, two pointless daggers and an easily breakable crossbow with just a few arrows.

A sitting duck is all who he is if he doesn't get out of here, but just as he was about to make a move, he hears growling but this growling was different compared to what he heard the first time, there wasn't any purring in the growl when he first heard it, …this was something else…

“O-ok…remember your training, Branch…Grandma has taught you how to fight…you cannot be afraid of the stupid dark…pull yourself together,” he spoke to himself as he held his stakes tightly, looking around for any sign of the source to that strange growling.

But when he turns his eyes to the left…that's where he sees the creature that is growling…a beetlebear, an beast that is half bear and half beetle, it was almost as big as an caterbus, with claws and teeth that are sharp enough to tear and eat innocent trolls apart, its eyes were an icy blue with hints of dark yellow, pure evil were inside those eyes and it was looking at branch like he is next on its menu.

Branch can feel his heart beating much faster than ever before as he turns his head to see the beetlebear before him, his hair, though half dead, starts to shake with fear as he takes a few steps back when the monster starts walking towards him with a ravenous look on its face.

But he puts on a brave face as he holds his two stakes out, “hmph! If you think you can eat me, beetlebear, think again! I have two stakes and I am not afraid to use them” he yelled out to the monster, trying to keep a distance far from it.

The beetlebear however, decides to keep walking towards the stitched troll with a menacing glare heavily focused on him. Its eyes staring into his soul to see if Branch was a tiny smidge afraid, but the boy isn't no coward..unlike a certain troll who he knew a long time ago..he gets into a battle stance as he circles around the monster, prompting them to do the same.

Suddenly, Branch yells out a battle cry and lunges at the beast with his stakes but unfortunately, he didn't realize that wood is no match for the strong tough skin of a critter that is almost as big as a caterbus when his stakes broke on impact.

“.....sugar…Plan B time!” He yelped as he took out his two daggers, the beast then decided to swipe its sharp claws at the troll, who managed to dodge in time. It roared in anger as it tried again but Branch kept dodging everytime the beast tried to scratch him.

He then decided to take a swipe at the monster's face with one of his daggers but that just made it more angry than before as the blade scarred its eye where a straight line is seen, then suddenly, it also starts seeping out a deep dark red liquid down its face, making the monster look more evil looking from before. It was at this moment that he knew…he screwed up.

“...I think I am way over my head in this so I'm just gonna..” he immediately starts running off in another direction, the scarred beetlebear following behind him, viciously determined to get revenge on this idiotic troll for wounding them.

The werecat, witnessing the whole thing, didn't exactly know what to feel. This troll, who looks just like him, managed to not only wound a critter but also made it so mad that it wanted vengeance..he is definitely unprepared for this…and yet…he is reminded of that fateful day when he was a kid…surviving on his own, living in the woods, unsupervised and then he encounters a monster that forever changed his life…this troll is a kid, a kid who obviously hasn't been around anyone who can help him…he couldn't help but feel utterly terrible about this troll…if this troll is him..then he must've went through the same thing he did : his brothers leaving, his grandmother getting eaten and him basically being the local outcast..his heart was going out for the kid.

And so, without thinking, he ran after the kid and the monster, trying to catch up to them, hoping that he wasn't too late to save the kid in time.

Back with Branch, he runs as fast as he can, trying to get away from the rampaging beetlebear before it catches him and eats him. He does some badass parkour around the rocks, small hills and various thorn bushes to evade his pursuer, yet he keeps getting scrapes and tears from the sharp edges of the rocks and the thorns but he doesn't care about it right now, he is deeply focused on getting away from the beast.

Unfortunately he accidentally tripped over a cobblestone rock as he fell on the grass and that caused the stitching that connects his foot to his leg to break slightly, “S-Sugar..Not now..” he muttered as he gets up and tries to run again but this causes him to have a limp so basically he's now more in danger than before.

He needs to find a place to hide from the monster hunting him down, he can't be out in the open with a limp or else the beast will catch him. He was able to find a hollow out tree trunk, a perfect place to hide and escape..right? He goes under the tree through a small hole which is the right size for a troll like him and he takes some deep breaths to make sure that he doesn’t get a panic attack.

The beetlebear however finds him underneath the tree, it angrily lunges at the hole entrance but unfortunately its muzzle was too big to fit inside the hole, which creates a huge problem for poor branch.

He's trapped.

His only exit is blocked by an angry beast.

He can't get out.

I̶T̶ ̶W̶A̶S̶ ̶L̶I̶K̶E̶ ̶T̶H̶E̶ ̶C̶A̶G̶E̶.̶ ̶W̶H̶E̶R̶E̶ ̶H̶E̶ ̶L̶O̶S̶T̶ ̶A̶N̶D̶ ̶R̶U̶I̶N̶E̶D̶ ̶E̶V̶E̶R̶Y̶T̶H̶I̶N̶G̶.̶ I̶T̶ ̶W̶A̶S̶ ̶G̶E̶T̶T̶I̶N̶G̶ ̶H̶A̶R̶D̶ ̶T̶O̶ ̶B̶R̶E̶A̶T̶H̶.̶ ̶W̶H̶E̶R̶E̶ ̶A̶R̶E̶ ̶H̶I̶S̶ ̶B̶R̶O̶T̶H̶E̶R̶S̶.̶ ̶H̶E̶ ̶W̶A̶N̶T̶S̶ ̶H̶I̶S̶ ̶B̶R̶O̶T̶H̶E̶R̶S̶.̶ ̶W̶H̶E̶R̶E̶ ̶A̶R̶E̶ ̶T̶H̶E̶Y̶.̶ S̶O̶M̶E̶B̶O̶D̶Y̶.̶ ̶A̶N̶Y̶B̶O̶D̶Y̶.̶ ̶P̶L̶E̶A̶S̶E̶ ̶H̶E̶L̶P̶ ̶H̶I̶M̶.̶ B̶E̶F̶O̶R̶E̶ ̶H̶E̶ ̶G̶E̶T̶S̶ ̶T̶A̶K̶E̶N̶ ̶A̶N̶D̶ ̶N̶E̶V̶E̶R̶ ̶W̶A̶K̶E̶ ̶U̶P̶.̶

He then curled up into a ball, using his slightly dead hair to cover himself and just began waiting for the beetlebear to just get this hunt over with and eat him.

Back with the Werecat, he was watching this from the tree top, he knew the troll was trapped inside that hollowed troll, and it was only a matter of time before this creature finds a way in and eats the troll inside. So with a final look, he then gets up, readies himself to then jump off from the tree branch and as he lands behind the beetlebear, he lets out an threatening yowl, which made the beetlebear stopped, slipped out from the hole, only to turn around and see a threat to its dinnertime.

“I'm gonna ask you once, get away from that kid in the tree or I will personally make sure you won't get to live to see tomorrow,” he growled at the beast before him, unfortunately the beetlebear doesn't listen to his demands as it roars angrily at the werecat for interrupting its hunt.

Right, it's a wild pissed off beast, of course intimidation is not gonna work on creatures like this but alas, there's always the second option, and this is kinda his favorite part. He crouched down on all fours, keeping his eyes, pupils now slit while glowing green, on the beetlebear while said beast gets ready to run at the werecat, both are at a standstill, watching and waiting to see who will move first.

And so after what seemed to feel like hours, the beetlebear moved first, running towards the werecat at a fast pace, which prompted the feline beast troll to dodge away from the monster, his claws were also out and were ready to attack.

The beetlebear saw this and lunged at the werecat yet again but the feline troll got the upper hand by jumping away from the beetlebear, then crouching down once more and finally lunging head first at the monster then proceeded to aggressively wrestle the monster, teeth and claws being his weapons.

The beetlebear managed to give some scars on the werecat’s arm and back, dark glittery blue blood seep from the newly made wounds, he yelped in pain yet that made him determinedly angry because he's now very focused on killing this beast in order to save that troll trapped in the tree. “YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT, YOU BASTARD!” He growled as he proceeded to look for a vital weak point, this continued for a while and you can hear yowling and roaring if you are currently walking by at this time.

But by then, after some more wrestling (and new scars for both the werecat and the beetlebear on its newly discovered weak spot) He was able to pin down the monster, finally bites down on his enemy and proceeded to tear it apart, blood and flesh were flown as he went violently savage at the monster underneath him.

By the time the beetlebear stopped thrashing, it was finally dead and the werecat let out a victorious yowl that echoed through the entire woods. Now that the beetlebear is out of commission, the feline beast then got off, shook off any traces of blood, the smell itself was starting to irritate his nose due to it being powerful enough to smell emotions as he can also smell the fear of the hiding troll in the tree, represented by the flavor being sour, so he carefully makes his way towards the tree hole, crouching down, and hoping to see if the troll is ok while also shifting back into troll form so he doesn't scare off the hiding troll in the tree.

Branch didn't know how long he had been curling in a ball position, it felt like a century had passed, but he heard someone yelling out, and in his mind, that can mean one of his siblings has come to save him! Yes! He is gonna be ok, his savior is here! He can finally go home, rest and have fluffleberry cake!

But wait..which one of his brothers is currently fighting the beetlebear right now? Is it Bruce? He's the best candidate due to his strength, Is it Clay? Nah he's like a stick, the beetlebear will break him in half, Is it Floyd? Nope, he's too much of a scaredy cat, Is it John Dory? Could be, he's got survival skills, Or is it Grandma? Nah she is still at the bunker and has no idea that he's in the dark abyss so basically, it could be either Bruce or JD.

Suddenly he hears a loud yowling noise that shook the entire tree he's in, wait a minute, WHO IS REALLY OUT THERE!? Could it be another beast that wanted the beetlebear gone so it can get a piece of him and not share with anyone else!? If so, he needs to escape before that happens.

“Hey…are you ok in there?” a strange voice spoke through the hole of the tree, Branch’s body started to stiff as the voice kept speaking, he doesn't know what to make of this new stranger..is it friendly? Is it a foe? He doesn't know..he wants to go home. “..please come out, I'm not going to hurt you, I just wanted to know if you need help? I took down the monster that wanted to hurt you..” the voice tried to assure him that the danger was gone.

Branch uncurls himself from his ball and now he is debating if he should go out or stay inside where it's safe..the voice sounded kind, it's not one of his brothers which is a relief because he doesn't want to be seen as being a scared baby and having grandma find out about this.

“Uhm…who are you? Are you good..or bad?” He timidly said, still unsure about the new voice, “Of course I'm good, I did say I took down the beast that was hunting you down, and my name, this will surprise you, is Branch, and I assume your name is also Branch” the voice replied.

….HUH!? THE NEW VOICE IS NAMED BRANCH!? HUUUUUUUH!? HOW CAN THAT BE!? GRANDMA HAS NEVER TOLD HIM THIS! Ok ok ok..calm down…he can figure this out..this will be a no brainer, “..yes my name is Branch like yours, sir..but I think we should have nicknames so we both can't be confused and I can come out to say my thanks properly” He said to the voice with the same name and waited for a response.

“..Werecat, my nickname is Werecat” the newly nicknamed voice replied, and Branch memorized it in his head, “ok then..and my nickname will be Stitches” he said to werecat and now that their new nicknames have been established, Stitches then decided to crawl out of the hole entrance and finally getting a look at his rescuer.

Wow…he looks so scary with those eyes and all those scars all over his body…and yet he looks fluffy..he even wears the same clothes as me, the vest has the same leafy texture with the same colors while his pants were also the same with some patches on them…no wonder he has the same name as he. But he suddenly realized something about the nickname his rescuer chose.

“Wait…did you say that your nickname is…Werecat?? Uhm..is there a reason why you chose that??” Stitches asked the doppelganger before him, wanting to know if there was any meaning behind it.

Werecat however knew that this was going to happen, he can't believe that he chose that as his nickname..this kid just went through a traumatic experience already and obviously doesn't need another one to deal with. However, something in his heart is begging him not to let this kid be afraid of him and give him the love and care he doesn't have..maybe that's the lonely gray troll in him talking to him.

“....Ok, there is a reason..just…don't freak out, ok stitches?” he asked the troll in front of him, praying that he doesn’t run away from him in fear or try to kill him with his weapons, he doesn't want to hurt him nor kill him, he will never forgive himself if it comes to that.

“...ok” is all stitches can say as he saw his doppelganger transforming right before his own eyes. Ah. That nickname makes so much sense. He's an actual werecat, one of the many types of werebeasts that currently live in the dark abyss. And yet, he saved him from that beetlebear which is currently lifeless on the floor far from where they're at. Maybe this one is a potential friend? He's not hurting him so that should be an opportunity to have a friendship with him.

He goes to pet the werecat troll on the head and immediately, that prompts the feline beast to purr loudly as he is actually enjoying the petting stitches is giving him,“...awwww, you like this, huh? I guess that makes sense since you're a cat and all” said Stitches as he kept petting his new friend.

Werecat, now a purring mess, falls to the ground and lets Stitches continue petting him, he had never got this kind of attention for a long time, he hadn't allow Poppy to pet him since he and she aren't quite best friends yet or at least that's what he can describe the status of their friendship, because in reality, he's just her glorified therapist….not that he doesn't mind…he is trying to help her find a healthy outlet instead of just going to his territory and let herself become gray.

“You're such a good kitty cat..I wish I can take you home..but I'm not allowed to bring home pets on the account of accidentally bringing a moth spider that almost got everyone eaten..that was a terrible time….but I can help clean your wounds” he said as he takes out a first aid kit from his hair and proceeded to disinfect, clean the blood off of him and put bandages on him.

After that was done, he puts his first aid kit away,“..There, you're all better” he said as he kept petting werecat’s head, ‘aw he's so adorable..i wonder if he has a home or something, I would definitely take him home but I'm sure I will be grounded with laundry duty for a month’ he thought to himself.

“....thank you for patching me up..” werecat said kindly as he kept purring, but he stopped as Stitches took his hand away and gets up, “you're welcome and I should probably get going, I would be much trouble if I'm late” he said as he went on his way back to his home.

Werecat obviously doesn't want Stitches to leave, especially if this place is full of dangers, so he decided to do something that he may not regret : he scuffs stitches and has him climb onto his back. “Ok hang on tight as I escort you home” he said to the kid on his back, who looks pretty surprised and excited, “...you mean it? I never had a escort before” Stitches as he hugged werecat’s neck tightly and held on when Werecat began to run on all fours across the dark abyss, leaping over some obstacles along the way. The wind was blowing through their hair and fur as the feline beast began to pick up the pace, Stitches had never felt like this before and he was starting to enjoy this ride so much.

“HAHAHAHA! THIS IS SO AWESOME!” Stitches cried out in happiness as Werecat ran out of the dark abyss and back into the good part of the forest.

The bunker should be not far from where they're currently at, Stitches was so happy that he's finally safe and best of all he gained a new friend! If only poppy can see him now…especially creek…he wonders what that troll is up to at this time. Maybe after dinner, he can send him a message, that's his favorite past-time, sending letters to his first two friends.

…..

Oh wait. I forgot. He's gone. He betrayed the village. He broke Poppy's heart. He broke his heart. Did he not care about her and him? Was that kiss from long ago just a trick? Was he a fool to be his friend?

No..don't focus on him..you have a new friend now, he's kind, he saved you, and he's super fluffy.

After a while of running, they made it to the bunker, surprisingly Stitches's brothers are not here yet. Must be busy trying to win this stupid competition. That's fine, he didn't want them hurting his new friend since all of them are trained in self defense. Although it's Grandma he should definitely be worried about, that troll is a dangerous force to be reckoned with, like she's the kind of woman who wakes up in the middle of the night and the devil who came into her room says “oh shit” when she sees the demon. And even if she got her colors back along with his and his brothers, she's still a threatening person who will personally destroy you with every single skill she has learned over the years.

Once Werecat stopped at the entrance, Stitches then gets off of his furry friend's back and brushes himself off of any cat hair because if he remembers correctly, cats shed their fur a lot but mostly it's due to intense emotions, the weather or just general. “Ok then, thanks for taking me home, I would let you in but…I don't think my home is suitable for visitors,” he said to werecat, hoping that his brothers don't come home earlier or later otherwise a fight will ensue.

Werecat understood as he is the same way with his own bunker for various reasons, like not letting everyone into the bunker at the risk of their safety and also the traps..although deep down, he wanted to get to know this new friend well and figure out a way to get home,“I understand, Stitches..I should find a cave to settle in, I'll see you soon” he said as he was about to leave, but Stitches stopped him, “wait..when can I see you again, werecat?” He asked him, hoping that he can hang out with him again soon.

“Probably if I can find a place to rest for the day, I might come over for a visit tomorrow and take you to my improv den, ok?” He said to stitches who beams up in excitement. “Ok then! I'll see you tomorrow then, I can't wait” the patchwork troll replied and werecat then takes his leave, running off deep into the woods, Stitches watches on until he cannot see him anymore.

After that, his brothers returned, they had dinner with their grandma, told their stories about their attempts to get a lot of sticks, although stitches was actually silent throughout the conversation, he didn't want his family knowing about his ordeal in the dark abyss then when it was time for bed, in his room, Stitches laid awake..just thinking..Where did that werecat came from..why does he look like me…and can he be able to convince his family that he's nice?

He can probably wait till tomorrow morning to get his questions answered.

TO BE CONTINUED..

[spenglercore]

Headcanons and AUs

Here is a list of ideas people can ask me about, nsfw stuff under the cut! I'll add links for each one I address over time.

General Egon headcanons:

He was a complete and utter chaos gremlin as a kid

He fell off the roof once when he was ten

That one time he actually bit a guy in college

He learned to drift on a bet

The MIT campus legend about a student that lived in a maintenance closet is not a legend

Ray has video of him post-wisdom teeth extraction, and it's hilarious

Man can COOK

Canon-divergent; these are based on the fic I'm currently writing, after which he stays to raise Callie instead of leaving for Oklahoma:

Callie was practically glued to him as a baby, although Grandpa* is an acceptable substitute

His car is a two-ton dad joke

He definitely terrorizes his daughter once in awhile

And his grandkids

How he ended up with a Twitch channel

He is also on TikTok

How he handles Trevor and Phoebe's dad leaving

Callie asks him to teach Trevor to drive, did not expect him to teach Trevor to drift the Ecto

Rocket Car Isotope:

His mother, Ilse Spengler, is German and his father, Piotr Kowalski, is Polish and both are ethnically Jewish. Both are different flavors of Nerd

How they met and became friends and later fell for each other

Ilse's dad Johann trolls Piotr twice in a row

Piotr asked Ilse out completely by accident

How they got to the US and how things went once they settled down

Piotr cannot hold his liquor to save his life.

Piotr learned his son was a very grabby baby The Hard Way

How Piotr got the nickname Four-Stroke

That time Ilse blew up the patio

The Big Damn Hero incident that almost got Piotr murdered by his wife

The time Piotr tackled Egon to the floor so he couldn't rat to Ilse that Dad's up and about on his bad leg despite being told to Not Fucking Do That

That other time Ilse had to get the hose out on her two idiots who were trying to out-stubborn each other

That other time Egon got gibslapped for telling his mom what happened the ONE time Piotr figured the odds were in his favor to drag race some chud at a stoplight

*Piotr learns his granddaughter inherited her father's grabbyness The Hard Way

The Alkali Metals Isotope:

Egon has five younger siblings and they're all various flavors of highly intelligent, devious little gremlins

Johann could be his twin, goes by Joe which comes back to bite him later in life

Wilhelmina, goes by Wil or Willie, is one of three of them that is almost always at the root of any major household chaos

Iosif is a copy-paste of his mother and also gets dragged into the nickname shenanigans with his older brother Johann

Marie is a copy-paste of her dad. Shit-starter and one of three of them that is almost always at the root of any major household chaos

Pierre is the last one who is almost always at the root of any major household chaos, but always manages to escape getting in trouble for it because everyone else is old enough to know better and he capitalizes on that.

NSFW headcanons below the cut; cw for both the sexy kind and the Substance Use kind

Egon did drugs For Science in college; he learned many things about himself and there were two or three Incidents(tm)

Still makes the best weed brownies though

How he discovered his kinks and what parts of his psyche and personality they tap into

Specifc to the Carbon Dating college AU:

Why everyone thinks that weird maintenance closet on the fourth floor of Bemis house at MIT was the scene of a murder

The alternate version of the wisdom teeth video

Specific to the Rocket Car isotope:

That time Piotr pulled a job to restore an antique steam-powered sex toy and it nearly broke him

[depressedhatakekakashi]

I just thought of something REALLY funny for the GOS universe, and was wondering what you think.

What if EVERY time Obito tries to reincarnate Gai into a bookshop owner's household... something happens that messes it up.

In merchant Gai's lifetime, his mom had a book store that burns down in a freak accident while she was pregnant with him, so she had fo find a new career before choosing to become a freedom fighter.

In Travelor Gai's life time, Obito had picked a pair of bookshop owners who had owned a famous book store for 5 generations... Only for him to get distracted by Rin mid-ritual and sending Gai somewhere else entirely, completely losing him. (In his defense, Rin was looking REALLY pretty that day.)

Husband lifetime, EVERYTHING WENT OFF WITHOUT A HITCH. His parents were a bookshop owner AND a librarian. The pregnancy and birth went well. The shop was secure and Obito even called in a favour from yamato to make sure there was a thorough inspection to ensure there would be NO CHANCE of it being destroyed. It was PERFECT.

...Until Kakazu decided to show up and KILL HIS PARENTS!!! FORCING THE GRANDPARENTS TO SELL THE SHOP!!!

Obito is just...so miffed about all this. Its starting to feel like cosmic interference. He's almost convinced Neji was trolling him, but he didn't have any proof.

All this to say, he could never give his brother a book keeping boyfriend like Kakashi always dreamed of having TT-TT.

Poor Obito just wants to give his brother a cute bookshop owning boyfriend, why is the universe so against this idea?

The answer is - as soon as Kakashi gets a bookshop boyfriend he dies XD

Like actually, him and Gai buy the bookshop that Gai’s parents used to own after saving for YEARS. They’re starting a new life, opening a bookshop together

Gai keeps joking about preparing to find his husband hiding away in every nook and corner reading a book instead of working.

And then two days later Kakashi’s getting stabbed in the market street, bleeding out on the ground putting an end to his mortal life.

Gai never even got to open the bookstore with his husband