#What Doctor For Tmj
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I remember reading this thing as a kid that was like “it’s as easy to bite through a human finger as a carrot, your mind just won’t let you do it”, and I was instantly like. That’s absolute bullshit. I’m 10 and I know that’s not true. Watch me prove it by attempting to bite my own fingers off. And guess what? It fucking hurt. But I still have all my fingers. Anyways, I’m stressed because of my math course rn and I was stuck on a particularly nasty set of problems, and I kept thinking “just fucking bite off your fingers and it will all go away”. And I wish I could
#idk what it is about Biting#but it’s like#such a good stress management tool ….#let me BITE !!!!#my jaw is so fucked up lol#I remember when I saw a doctor for my tmj he was like NO STEAK!!!! NO CHEWY CANDY!!! NO BAGELS!!!!#(ofc I ignored this…)#but he said NOTHING about biting off fingers so I feel like it’s safe#he would have told me if it wasn’t allowed#ANYWAYS I’m going to fail this class for SURE
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u know it’s not good when even the doctor goes ‘oh wow’ while making that face after checking u up
#like#she put her hand on my jaw n asked me to open my mouth wide twice#n the look on her face as she just went ‘oh’#at least i know now it probably is partly genetic#but she also mentioned TMJ so there’s a chance it’s that too#tbh i lov going to the doctors cause they’ll be like ‘so this is what x means..’ n my autistic ass has already researched so shit#tbh i lov going to the doctors bc they start explaining like ‘so this is x and basically what x means is..’ n my autistic ass is nodding -#- along like i havnt done a fuck shit ton of research on what i was coming in for#‘oh is that what that is? idk that’ they say knowing exactly what that is#plum.txt
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Are your scissors dull? Would you like tips regarding sewing needles?
If you're having a difficult time cutting through material, your scissors likely need sharpening. There are two ways I've used for this, and they're both very effective.
The semi-free version:
Take aluminum foil, a long sheet of it, and fold this into about four layers.
Cut through all four layers, in thin strips, with your scissor. I make the strips less than half an inch apart, and cut the long way. You will need to be careful because the edges of the foil will be sharp.
After you get through all four layers at least six to eight times, fold what's left of the sheet in half. This will create eight layers, cut through these until the sheet is gone.
Test your scissors by cutting through scraps. I've made children's scissors sharp enough to cut through four layers of fabric when I use this method.
The inexpensive version.
Purchase this. You can find it in fabric stores, craft stores, and even a department store (like Walmart) in their crafting supply section. I bought mine at Joann Fabrics, when they had a sale, for less than $8.
Scissor sharpeners are super easy to use. Just follow the instructions they come with. Basically, you slide them in, and pull them out like you're cutting.
You won't need to do many passes for most scissors, but you will make children's scissors very dangerous.
For very small scissors, like applique or embroidery types.
Use the semi-free section.
You will only need two layers for the first pass, not nearly as much as you would for larger blades. So make the sheet smaller.
After five or six passes, fold the layers in half for four layers. Make several more passes.
Test your scissors to see how sharp they are. If unsatisfied, make more passes through the foil layers.
I hope this was helpful!
For hand-sewing sharpening needles, the little strawberry attached to the tomato pincushions serves that purpose. Stab your needle through that a few times. I find it works only so many times before I simply need to switch to a new one.
As for machine sewing needles, sharpening them borders on pointless. I suggest using Organ Needles if price is a big issue for you. My experience with Organ Needles has been phenomenal. The low price and high count, and the fact they last just as long as the name brand stuff you find in supply shops is just a bonus.
I have a pack of 100 sewing needles for less than $30. Compare that to the $10-$20 a package of five or ten name brand needle packs cost. Even if half the needles in my 100 pack start dull, it's still less than what I would otherwise pay. Thus far, this hasn't happened.
My needles go dull swiftly when I do any foundation paper piecing, stitching through fabric and paper, and paper dulls scissors* real quick. Imagine how fast that is with a needles, making hundreds of stitch through all those layers. If I notice the stitches look messy, I switch out my needle. I still have over half left, and have been using the same pack for around a year now.
If you're wondering how to dispose of the used sewing needles, may I suggest a plastic bubblegum container? I used to chew gum all the time, but had to stop after my doctor explained it's very bad due to my TMD/TMJ (and having hEDS also explains why large pieces of gum would dislocate my jaw). Because of my habit of keeping perfectly acceptable containers, I had two empty ones. One is used for my handsewing, like a little trash container. Opening and closing the floor models is irritating, and the fact I have a cat means all trashcans in this house must have a lid. Anyway...I use my second to hold used needles, broken or bent pins, and after four years of using this, the thing isn't even a quarter of the way filled. It'll likely be decades before emptying it will be necessary. The hard plastic edges make it impossible for any of the pointy ends from puncturing, thus making it safe for all and no trash bags will suffer.
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Chiron: where is our physical (and mental) wound?
I'm currently reading a book about Chiron (did you know it's actually half asteroid, half comet? me neither), which inspired me to make this post. I'm in no way an expert in medical astrology, just a curious owl that wants to learn more about every branch of astrology out there (my Sag Venus loves it!!🤭)
DISCLAIMER!!! I'm not a doctor. If you've been feeling any symptoms described here, TALK WITH YOUR DOCTOR, NOT WITH ME
Observation: Before we dive in, i'd like to mention that the position of Chiron in the houses is important. Not every house placement suggests having a poor physical condition. The most prominent Chiron placements when it comes to having a medical condition are: Chiron in 1st house (house of self, visible illnesses), Chiron in 5th house (illnesses since birth/early childhood), Chiron in 6th house (house of health, if Saturn is also sitting there it points to chronic illnesses), Chiron in 8th house (house of death, may point to severe diseases or poor reproductive health) and Chiron in 12th house (house of the unconscious, deals with mental illnesses)
Honorable mention to Chiron in 3rd house and Chiron in 9th house as they represent accidents while travelling. If Chiron is heavily afflicted in these houses (unless it's also conjuncting Jupiter), it may point to...let's just say you're gonna be in a hospital bed in a vegetative state, but remember, nothing has a 100% possibility of happening, you're just more susceptible to it happening. I suggest checking the position of Chiron in Solar Return charts for the possible timing of it happening (look for Chiron in 3rd house/Chiron in 9th house as it activates your natal Chiron)
Without further do, let's dive in⚕️
Chiron in Aries: frequent headaches, frequent nose bleeds, teeth problems (sensitive teeth, tooth decay), deafness, skull fractures, cerebral anemia, brain tumours, hemophilia, epilepsy, BPD
Chiron in Taurus: frequent colds, frequent voice loss, thyroid problems (goiter, hyperthyroidism, hypothyroidis, etc.), tonsilitis, OCD
Chiron in Gemini: lung problems (asthma, tuberculosis, pneumonia, etc.), speech problems (stuttering, cluttering, mutism), alzheimer's disease, ADHD, OCD
Chiron in Cancer: frequent stomach pain, prone to lactose intolerance, (for girls) breast lumps, breast cysts, breast infections, nipple discharge, depression, anxiety
Chiron in Leo: prone to insolation, frequent heart palpitations, chest pain, hypertension, hypotension, arteriosclerosis, scoliosis, kyphosis
Chiron in Virgo: frequent bloating, prone to gluten intolerance, chronic allergies, diabetes, rabies, autism, ADHD, OCD
Chiron in Libra: prone to acne, frequent lower back pain, disc herniation, spondylolisthesis, chronic kidney disease, kidney stones
Chiron in Scorpio: frequent pain down there, chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, HIV/AIDS, depression
Chiron in Sagittarius: frequent pain in the hips, prone to hips dislocation, cirrhosis, sciatica
Chiron in Capricorn: prone to knees dislocation, osteoarthritis, bone problems (osteopenia, osteoporosis), gout, depression
Chiron in Aquarius: electrical injuries, shin splints, osteofibrous dysplasia, ankle sprain, ankle fractures, poor blood circulation, schizophrenia
Chiron in Pisces: prone to break toes, athlete's foot, bunions, addison's disease, hormonal deregulation, aphantasia, psychosis, schizophrenia, anxiety
Yes, i'm aware of the fact that it's a generational planet and it moves very slowly through signs
BONUS: It's important to take into consideration all planets that conjunct, square or opposite Chiron (regardless if they're personal or generational) + the Ascendant for additional info about our illnesses
Ex. Let's take me as an example. My Chiron is in my 10th house in Capricorn squaring Saturn in 4th house (so double Capricorn energy) and Aries Ascendant. Guess what? I've got TMJ (basically a jaw disorder affecting the joints) and i've got it from my fam -_- (Saturn rules tradition i love my fam)
I also believe that having a heavy afflicted Chiron in general makes someone prone to having a medical condition, even if it's not in the houses mentioned previously (like in my case). However, these people are more focused on the main meaning of the house, not their health problems. They tend to ignore their health problems or they just don't care
I hope you enjoyed my post and found it insightful :)
What's your wound? Lmk in the comments your placements and your illnesses
Kisses xoxo
#astro#astro community#astro placements#astrology#astro posts#astro observations#medical astrology#chiron#chiron in aries#chiron in taurus#chiron in gemini#chiron in cancer#chiron in leo#chiron in virgo#chiron in libra#chiron in scorpio#chiron in sagittarius#chiron in capricorn#chiron in aquarius#chiron in pisces#astroblr#astro notes#astrology notes#astro blog
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Orthopedic was not available today due to republic day so I had to go to local doctor but I genuinely didn't wanted to go to him because he gives off creepy vibes so I tried to fix it myself while waiting in turn and succeeded 💀💀
My fucking jaw dislocated again. I'm so tired of my body
#insert that meme 'you know i am something of a doctor myself'#i researched what tmj dislocation was after it dislocated for the first time and it fucking helped#always research folks
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I DIDN'T KNOW BUT HAPPY NATIONAL MIGRAINE AWARENESS MONTH.
Things that I learned since having migraines.
They can change. You can go years without migraines, but then suddenly get them again.
Symptoms and triggers can change. You may think you don't got it that bad because you don't have the worst of the symptoms but then one day you suddenly got vertigo and vomiting.
Migraines impact the trigeminal nerve which is the same nerve impacted my TMJ pain, sinus headaches, trigeminal neuralgia, and cluster headaches. It's the biggest nerve in the face so it's pretty common to have multiple of these conditions at once.
Migraines can be triggered my barometric pressure shifts, flashing lights, sounds, and smells.
You can have migraines without aura or visual disturbances. These are harder to treat because most migraine medications require you to take them during the aura phase.
You can have what's called an "abdominal migraine" which is characterized my extreme stomach pain. This usually impacts adolescents.
You can have what's called a "silent migraine" which is characterized as migraines without the headache. In fact headache isn't even the most common migraine symptom based on a poll I've done.
Migraines can be highly tied into your allergies. Not just in the fact that sinus headaches and migraines trip the same nerve, but in the fact that your allergies can be a migraine trigger.
Migraines can make you more susceptible to alcohol especially when you're dealing with migraines triggers frequently.
Fluorescent lights are actually very bad for people with migraines because it's essentially flashing so fast you can't see it with the human eye (but trust me your migraines will know it's there).
It's actually very common for people with migraines to have heightened senses of smell, higher sensitivity to lights/sounds, etc. Some people have even noted that people with certain medical conditions have different smells.
Chronic migrains are obviously a disability but episodic migraines can be considered a dynamic disability (a disability where your needs fluctuate)
Migraine preventatives are different from migraine abortives. Doctors will usually only prescribe preventatives if you have chronic migraines or have a certain number of migraines a month.
15 migraine days a month is the number you're looking for to be considered chronic.
It's actually pretty common to be craving salt or carbs after a migraine. And listening to those cravings can actually reduce postdrome symptoms
Migraines come in 4 phases. Prodrome (irritability, fatigue, etc before the migraine), aura (visual disturbances), migraine, and postdrome (fatigue, dizziness, etc after the migraine).
The most common migraine meds are called triptans and shouldn't be taken with antidepressants because it can cause serotonin overdose syndrome.
Migraine aura isn't limited to visual disturbances. It can include phantom taste and smell (smelling or tasting things that aren't there)
People that have migraines are more likely to deal with heat intolerance
A lot of the "it's a migraine if you experience pain on this side of the head" is complete garbage. Migraines are characterized by a complex set of neurological symptoms of which doesn't always include headaches.
-fae
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Well. Time to go to the Doctor to see if they can do ANYTHING at all for my TMJ pain or they'll just call me a stupid clown again and tell me to 'Keep doing what you're doing' (taking the max amount of recommended advil.)
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worried | esme morgan x reader
summary: the one where esme can't help but worry
warnings: none
word count: 2k
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Exhausted from a long day of classes, I stumbled into the apartment that Esme and I shared. While I was at uni, Esme was out running errands before she had to leave for camp. I immediately cleaned myself up and collapsed into our bed, my ear throbbing with pain. Esme and I went to the Coldplay concert a couple of days ago so I didn’t know I had an ear infection because of that or something else. My tiredness overpowered me, and soon, I drifted off to sleep.
A few hours later, I was jolted awake by Esme's voice echoing through the apartment. “Babe, I’m home!” she called, clearly searching for me. Usually, I would be in the kitchen preparing dinner for both of us, but tonight my earache was too much to handle.
“Babe, where are you?” I attempted to cover my ears with a pillow, hoping to dull the ringing sensation, but it was futile. Esme entered our room, her eyes immediately landing on me, sensing that something was wrong as she saw me in discomfort. She sat down beside me, gently prying the pillow away, and cradled my head in her lap, concern etched across her face.
"What's wrong?" she asked softly.
"My ear," I managed to say, wincing as the pain intensified. "It feels like it's going to pop."
Esme's breath hitched, her panic mirroring my pain. I didn't want her to worry further. "Can you get me some painkillers, please?" I requested, trying to divert her attention. She nodded, her love for me evident in every gesture. Esme went to the bathroom to fetch the medicine, and I slowly sat up, assessing the pain in my ear. As she returned, I smiled to ease her worries and took the painkillers with a grateful expression.
“Thank you.” I smiled wider at her. After I drank the medicine, she caressed my hair with a tender touch and leaned down to kiss my forehead. I tried to shift so she could sit beside me, but Esme insisted on holding me close, her arms wrapping around my waist as she nestled me between her legs, providing me with comfort and care. She rested her chin on my shoulder on the side of my ear that wasn’t hurting.
“What happened? Should I take you to the hospital?” Esme asked. She was always worried about me and I loved her for that. It shows me that she cares a lot about me. I pulled away a bit so I could look at her face.
“It’s fine. I think my TMJ is just acting up. I thought it was because of the concert but it has been days since then and I wasn’t able to open my mouth properly earlier when I ate my lunch.” I answered her. I couldn't resist and gave her a kiss on her cheek. She looked at me lovingly and smiled.
“I was worried, you know. I didn’t see you in the kitchen and I thought about the worst possible things.” Anxiety evident in her voice. I wasn’t shocked when she voiced her concern to me. It has always been a rule in our relationship to be open about each other’s feelings. I put my hand on her cheek, my thumb running a smooth pattern over it.
“I’m sorry I made you worried, love. I should have texted you when I got home.” I planted a kiss on her lips. I tried to deepen the kiss but she pulled away. I know she was worried that I’m gonna hurt myself. I gave her a reassuring smile.
“Are you sure you’re alright now?” She asked me again.
I smiled warmly at Esme, appreciating her love and concern. "I'm feeling a bit better now, thanks to you," I said, my voice still a little strained from the lingering discomfort in my ear. "But I promise I'll keep an eye on it. If it doesn't get better soon, I'll see a doctor."
Esme nodded, her worry still evident in her eyes. "Okay, just promise me that you won't hesitate to go to the hospital if it gets worse," she implored, her fingers gently intertwining with mine.
"I promise," I replied sincerely, knowing how important my well-being was to her.
She leaned in and rested her head against mine, finding comfort in our closeness. "You know, sometimes I wish I could stop worrying too much about you," she admitted, her voice soft and vulnerable.
I turned to face her, lifting her chin with my hand to meet her gaze. "Esme, your caring nature is one of the things I love most about you," I said, my words filled with sincerity. "You're always there for me, and I never have to doubt how much you care."
A small smile tugged at the corners of her lips. "I guess I can't help it, I think you'd find me overbearing if I care too much about you," she admitted. "I just love you so much, and I can't stand the thought of anything happening to you."
I placed my hand over her heart, feeling its gentle rhythm beneath my touch. "And I love you just as much," I replied. "You're my anchor, Esme. Your worry, your love, it all keeps me grounded."
Esme's eyes softened, and she pulled me into a tight embrace. "I don't know what I'd do without you," she whispered.
"You'll never have to find out," I assured her, wrapping my arms around her as well. "We'll always be here for each other, no matter what."
"So takeout for dinner tonight?" Esme suggested with a playful smile, trying to lighten the mood after our heartfelt exchange.
I chuckled softly, appreciating her attempt to bring some lightheartedness into the moment. "Sounds good to me," I replied, feeling grateful for her caring and thoughtful nature. "You always know how to make things better."
Esme's smile widened, and she leaned in to place another tender kiss on my lips. "I'll take care of everything," she said softly, her eyes filled with love. "You just rest and relax, okay?"
I gave her a nod and leaned back against her, feeling the warmth of her embrace envelop me. We spent the evening in bed eating the takeout she had ordered for us Coldplay softly playing in the background. I found solace in the company of the person I loved the most as the pain in my ear gradually lessened throughout the evening.
The next day, Esme insisted on taking me to the doctor. I was a bit hesitant but I knew it was for the best. We sat together in the waiting room, her hand holding mine tightly as we waited for my turn. Esme's worry was evident as she kept asking me if I was okay, her leg bouncing up and down.
When we finally saw the doctor, they confirmed that the earache was indeed a result of the loud concert and TMJ. They prescribed some medication and advised us to be cautious about loud environments in the meantime. Esme listened attentively, taking notes and asking questions to ensure my well-being.
In the days that followed, Esme and I cherished every moment together, knowing that soon she would have to leave for the football camp leading up to the World Cup. Despite the upcoming separation, we made the most of the time we had, savoring each other's company.
I couldn't help but feel a mixture of excitement for her as the day of her departure drew near and a tinge of sadness over the brief separation. Esme had a contagious love of football, and I was aware of how important the World Cup was to her but the idea of being apart from her for a while weighed heavily on my heart at the same time.
I got up early on the morning of her departure to make Esme a special breakfast. I wanted to be sure she had a delicious and energizing breakfast because she had been busy with last-minute preparations. I smiled at her and handed her a plate of her favorite breakfast as she sat down at the table.
"You're spoiling me," she said, her eyes lighting up with gratitude.
"I just want to make sure you're well-fed before you conquer the world," I replied with a playful wink.
Esme laughed, and for a moment, the worry about her departure lifted as we enjoyed each other's company. We talked about her plans for the camp and the excitement surrounding the upcoming World Cup. I assured her that I'd be cheering her on from home and eagerly awaiting her return.
After breakfast, we sat on the couch cuddling, soaking up the love and warmth in each other's presence. When she finally had to go, we stood at the doorway, clinging to each other tightly.
"I'll miss you," I whispered, my voice tinged with emotion.
"I'll miss you too," Esme replied, her arms wrapped around me as if she never wanted to let go. "But I promise, I'll call and message you every day, and we'll see each other again in just a few days when we play the send-off game."
"I'll be counting down the minutes," I said, pressing a tender kiss to her lips. "Go out there and show the world what you're made of, superstar."
Esme grinned, her eyes shining with determination. "I will. I'll make you proud."
“You always make me proud.”
True to her word, Esme kept in touch every day, sharing stories of her training and the excitement building up for the World Cup. Her messages and calls were a lifeline, keeping us connected to her even though we were apart.
Finally, the day of the send-off game arrived, and I eagerly made my way to the stadium to watch Esme play. Sitting in the stands, my heart swelled with pride as I saw her on the field, giving her all with passion and determination. She moved with grace and skill, commanding the game like the fierce athlete she was. The cheers of the crowd mixed with the beat of my heart, all in support of the woman I loved.
I joined the other fans in praising Esme and her team for their outstanding performance as the final whistle blew. I couldn't wait to give her a big hug and tell her how wonderful she was.
After the game, I waited eagerly for her in the stands. She was signing stuff for some fans when she saw me. She ran in my direction and gestured for me to come down to the field. She immediately engulfed me in a big hug and it spoke volumes of the love we had for each other.
"You were amazing out there," I said, pulling away from her beaming with pride.
Esme blushed, her eyes glowing with happiness. "Thank you, love," she replied, her voice tinged with excitement. "It means the world to me to have you here, cheering me on."
"I'll always be your number one fan," I said, squeezing her hands.
She leaned in to plant a soft kiss on my lips. "I'll make sure you're by my side every step of the way," she whispered, her eyes locked on mine. "No matter the distance, no matter the challenges, we'll face them together."
Touched by her words, I felt butterflies in my chest. "I believe in you, love," I said, my voice filled with conviction. "And I'm so proud to be with someone as talented and caring as you."
Esme's smile widened, and she pulled me closer, wrapping her arms around me protectively. "I couldn't ask for a better partner," she murmured against my hair. "You're my rock, and your love gives me the strength to chase my dreams."
We stood there enjoying each other's company. The World Cup was just the start of an exciting chapter in our lives. Esme's journey was certain to be full of difficulties and victories, but I was prepared to be there for her at every turn, encouraging and loving her unconditionally.
#esme morgan#esme morgan x reader#woso fanfics#woso x reader#lionesses x reader#lionesses#woso imagine#woso imagines#woso community
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Went to my doctor and he has no clue whats wrong with me!!! Fun
My jaw and the lymph nodes in my neck have been sore and swollen for the past few days and I woke up this morning having difficulty swallowing. Haha I'm in danger
#hes like yeah your throat mouth and ears all look fine. you have a fever and theres swelling but idk whats causing it#he told me to wait and see if it goes down over the weekend. like bro cmon#theres tmj pain on one side but that wouldn't cause bilateral swelling. so whats causing it then#I HATE DOCTORS. WHY DO THEY NEVER HAVE ANSWERS FOR ANYTHING
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so this year I've been making a point to catch up on the healthcare I was denied as a kid and teen. and every time it gives me a bad PTSD flareup. I got my bottom wisdom teeth out yesterday and even though the procedure was fine (aside from some billing bullshit that's not worth getting into) I have been depressed all day thinking about how this should have been done ten years ago. Thinking about how I have had migraines and sinus issues and TMJ because I never got them out until now. My mom said I "didn't deserve" healthcare as a kid and every time I take care of myself I feel like I'm sinning. She wouldn't take me to the dentist she wouldn't take me to the doctor she wouldn't take me to a therapist she wouldn't take me to any adult who may notice what was going on at home. She hobbled me to keep her own secrets. I hate her so much and it comes back in a red-hot wave every time I admit I deserved better
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On Facebook!
_
Me: Okay, someone with TMJ, trigeminal nerve pain, and sinus pain help walk me through the differences so I can figure out what's happening in my face.
My good friend Becca: OMG SOMEONE FINALLY NEEDS ME!!!!
TMJ is an achy, muscular pain. If you press on the hinge of your jaw and/or the back of your skull where it meets your neck, you will feel intense pain followed by release. Causes headaches on one side, usually in the back. Opening your mouth wide while touching your jaw will produce a “pop” on one side and a feeling of sliding sideways on the other. Helped by: NSAIDS, muscle relaxants, heat. Hurt by: crunchy food, chewy food, jaw clenching.
Trigeminal neuralgia feels like random electrical shocks at the base of your teeth, radiating up into your cheek. One side. No headache. Pain can also be sharp or burning (when mine was at its worst it felt like someone put a flaming fireplace poker between my teeth and slammed my jaw shut), but the hallmark is that “shocky” pain. Helped by: medication that is specifically for nerve pain (like gabapentin). Absolutely nothing else helps. Hurt by: ??? (Mine is kind of related to the cold but…???)
Sinus pain is usually heavy pressure and an ache or occasional sharp pain in the jaw. Headaches bilateral and in the front of the head, in a “mask” around the eyes. Trigger points are at the inside corner of the eyebrow and the outer corner of the nostrils, applying firm pressure there will cause SEVERE pain that will lessen over time. Cheeks and forehead may also be sensitive to touch. Also might present as a sore throat. Helped by: sudafed, antihistamines, NSAIDS, cold. Hurt by: that depends on the person. If it’s unrelenting and doesn’t respond well to meds you should see a doctor to check for infection.
Oh my goodness I feel so useful 🖤
_
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obligatory 2023 roundup, the good and the bad
2023 was....my least favorite year in a while! Two wrist surgeries, both of which didn't heal ideally or are still doing so, painful TMJ when there was previously no pain, weird foot issues exacerbated by a fun trip! and a cortisone shot! It's been the year of more constant pain than I've been used to and it's driven me a bit insane.
had the worst depression since, uh, probably college this fall! I cried every day for the better part a month! full wracking sobs! the worst thoughts! I went back to therapy! my therapist is inexperienced in outpatient but, oddly enough specializes in the one thing I got referred to for testing and the result was 'eh not quite enough'. I am also terrible at doing the simple things I need to do aka my PT exercises bc the depression overrides those bitches I need to just...set alarms! and follow them! unless it's a doctor's appointment or somewhere I have to be it's so easy to just...put it off!
I did have some good times towards the start of the year - between my two surgeries, I went on two trips! I posted pics from one of them - sorry to those enjoying my Turkey pics, I got distracted by, uh, the depression - and I also went to Japan! Enjoyed both trips for different reasons, Turkey was the bigger surprise. (Japan also exacerbated my foot issues, I'm happy to tromp around anywhere but, uh, it was a bit too much for my body to handle.)
as for this year...I have one trip planned, and it's a bit of a splash out. I imagine I'll post some pics on a delay, we'll see! Personal life-wise, god I need to get out more. Work on my confidence, figure out where I want to go next. fix my body issues more, will my scar tissue to shrink, solve my shoe dilemma! My current career is a stopgap which is a win-win situation cash-wise but it's not what I'd like to do. and the hours mean it's during normal socialization hours.
I'm doing better than I was a few months ago, at least.
here's to a better 2024, all. I'm glad I'm still blogging and that you're still reading. time to listen to the mountain goats and make it through another year.
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I think it's real interesting that doctors will be like "yeah, sciatic pain is caused by the piriformis muscle pressing on the sciatic nerve" and then turn around and laugh when someone says massage helped or fixed their pain.
Like... bro massage therapy has been around for 5000+ years for a reason. Chinese medicine worked out muscle tension issues and patterns before we had your knowledge of internal anatomy and cortisone injections. And yes, the injections help- absolutely. Especially if someone has a bulging disc or something structurally wrong. But when it's a muscle tension issue? And you laugh when someone says loosening the muscle helped??? (There's also a lot of other stuff going on in a massage, like lymph movement to help your body move white blood cells where they need, and breaking up connective tissue that is holding muscles in place)
ALSO the injections were a method used by massage therapists in the 1980s. They were only moved into the medical field recently when they started with cortisone instead of a saline solution. Like we helped build your field and then you turn back and laugh at us and our ability to help people?
I have had so many clients come to me after having no relief from going to doctors for years and getting on pills, having surgeries, or doing so many tests. All turning up fine. But no doctor will say "hey, this could be a muscular issue, find a massage therapist that specializes in therapeutic/myofascial/pain relief massage." They just say "oh nothing is wrong! What a great thing for you! You're totally fine!" As if these people aren't hurting on a DAILY basis.
And massage doesn't fix everything, no. But when it takes your daily pain from a 8 to a 2? Or when it helps your joints not grind as much (cause they arent being pulled together by tense muscles) so you have less joint degeneration over time? That's worth it. I have chronic anxiety and I get migraines and my jaw hurts constantly and my ears ring when I dont get neck and TMJ massage (though I specialize in it now- internal and external- so I mostly do it on myself). My lower back hurts, my legs hurt, i have GI issues, I cant take as large of breaths, I get acid reflux, I cant twll when Im hungry, and bladder is tiny when I dont get abdominal and hip massage. The ONLY option given to me beforehand was pain meds. My mom has chronic anxiety and trauma and threw out her back on a monthly basis and had both knees replaced. And no doctor ever says "this is connected" but it IS.
I just want to work WITH modern medicine instead of feeling like Im trying to fight an uphill battle against doctors who just want to throw pain meds, surgeries, and injections at things that can be fixed with massage- especially if they are caught soon enough and not when someone is at their breaking point.
I want insurance to cover massage so my clients dont have to worry about having to weigh whether or not to be in pain or to eat.
I want to be taken seriously as someone who specializes in releasing muscular tension. I learned how the whole fucking body works to do my job. On a cellular level. On a nutrition level. I learned the name of every bone, every process of every bone, and nearly every single muscle in the body. I learned how they attach, how they overlap, how to identify muscle vs other types of tissue by feel. I learned the nerves that go through every muscle and how they affect each other. How if you have a tight muscle in your neck, it could exhibit as carpal tunnel because it's pinching the nerve and causing everything along it to tense up- and that can be true along ANY nerve. You can have foot pain because your hip is tight cause it pinches the nerve. And you can tell which nerve it is based on where the peripheral pain is and follow the entire nerve to the spine and find tension along the whole thing.
I learned about every gland, lymph node, and organ in the body. I learned about the different skin to skin transmittable diseases so not only do I not get anything, but also so I dont pass it on to the next client. I learned how to disinfect things properly for blood, piss, and other fluids. I learned what melanoma and other skin cancers look like and how cancerous tissue feels and reacts so I can identify it as an issue and tell people to go to the doctor and get it checked out. I learned about different diseases and medications that contraindicate with massage. I learned about how pregnancy can dislocate someone's hip with muscular tension and cause issues that doctors say are "normal" after pregnancy.
I learned how to identify what is tight on someone just by how they stand and walk. I learned how your emotions (especially ones you can't/wont physically show) affect what muscles you tense up and can make muscle tension worse- and sometimes when that muscle is release you feel that emotion come at you in waves. I had a chest massage trigger a mental breakdown because my brother had died only 3 months before and you tense your chest when you feel grief and cant express it.
I learned how different jobs affect your body. How not using your full range of motion in your daily life will limit your range of motion later.
I know a hell of a lot and only had 7 months to do it- some days I was in class for 10+ hours and then still had to go home and study. I worked my ass off to be in my field and to help people. And yet I am shut out of their health team and laughed at by doctors for "thinking I can help."
Massage WORKS. Does it fix cancer? No. Does it fix any other underlying disease? No. But it calms down your nervous system, helps your lymphatic system, helps your circulation, breaks up restrictive connective tissue, and releases tense muscles. Which means it makes you healthier, more flexible, in less pain, and calms down anxious reactions and overstimulation.
Please for the love of god, can massage be viewed as medical as it actually is?????
#massage therapy#kind of a rant#personal#job#massage#massage therapist#lmt#licensed massage therapist
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Just took pics of myself to try to get my cats tucked into my sides, and spent a long time staring at myself. I haven't taken pics of myself (or had pics of myself taken) in, like, practically a decade (voluntarily), and I barely look at myself in the face in the mirror anyhow. So I just... Looked at myself.
Older than I think I should be, eyes green in the light than the blue they actually are, and struck at how noticeable and present the scar is over my right eyebrow an old girlfriend gave me over 17 years ago when she hit me in the face and the lens of my glasses bit me deep enough I had to go to urgent care and get stitches... Then had to take the stitches out myself (by asking said ex-girlfriend to take them out with tweezers) when they wanted to charge me to take them out themselves when the original doctor said they wouldn't.
*sighs* And you know the nurse actually asked me, my ex-girlfriend in the room still with me, if there was any foul play going on (intimating abuse)? And I just repeated myself, lying through my teeth, that no, me and my ex-girlfriend were just rough-housing and it just happened - - while all I could remember was the bright, hot feeling of blood waterfalling down my forehead and the sound of it splattering in my hand and down on the mattress after she hit my glasses off my face because I was crying and holding onto her and her heated, "Are you happy now?" as I gasped and stared down at the red fountaining out.
Head/face wounds bleed a lot. For a long time. Getting on the bus to go to the urgent care was... Awkward.
You also know jaw clicking sticks around? Seventeen years after getting hit hard enough in the side of the head another time, I still have TMJ issues.
..
You know, I still wonder what I would have answered if they had asked me if she hadn't have been in the room?
Probably still would have lied, as in love with her as I had been, but I just really don't know.
...
I just know it always confused me that, upon hearing my story about play-wrestling with my girlfriend and accidentally getting hit in the face, said girlfriend in the room with me, the nurse asked me about the possibility of abuse.
You ask me. With the abuser in the room. Sitting next to me?
How else could I have answered?
...
How else could I have answered?
...
It's been seventeen years. Didn't realize how much I still felt about this.
#tw: abuse#tw: physical abuse#tw: blood#don't know what else to tag as#just... reminiscing#...*sighs*#this has been a post
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cuddles accompanied by little kisses / rulie
The two of them are cuddled in bed one lazy Saturday morning-nowhere to be, no obligation to get up when Reggie suddenly looks at Julie and says. "It's just not fair."
"WHat's not fair cariño?" she asks, blinking at him and wondering what she had missed.
"It's not fair how cute you are," he said with a cheeky grin. "Can't even save some cute for the rest of us." '
Julie snorts at that, giving him a playful shove before reeling him back in, nuzzling their noses together. "Says the fan favourite Phantom who frequently appears on Hottest Celebrity lists."
Reggie grins even wider, pushing his hair back from his face, but without product it essentially just flops around. "Well yeah, I'm hot shit. But you-you're the cutest."
Julie shakes her head, still amused, and then gets an idea. "Well I think you're plenty cute," she said, then leans in and presses a tender kiss to the space between his brows. "It's cute when you're confused and this scrunches up so adorably."
A kiss to the apple of his cheek; "How your freckles start here, decorating your cute face."
The point of his chin, accompanied by a tiny nip of teeth. "How you're so sensitive here, but never let anyone but me know it."
Not to be left out, Reggie hums and then plants a little to the tip of her nose. "I love when your nose scrunches up when you're especially happy, like you can't contain it to your smile."
The hinge of her jaw, "How you never let anything hold you back, even trying to go on with the worst case of TMJ the doctor ever saw."
The pulse point that has a rabbiting rhythm behind it. "How strong and fierce you are, how alive even when the world seems to be crumbling around you."
"I'm only strong because I know I have such a good support system," Julie replied, bringing their lips together for a fleeting kiss. "I have the strength to get up and face the world every day because I know you're right there next to me."
"Not exactly a hardship," Reggie confessed, "You're pretty easy to love." He presses another kiss to her mouth, a little longer this time. "Doesn't hurt you're cuter than a box of kittens."
"Well you're cuter than a happy baby fresh out of the bath," Julie joked.
"Oooh, those are pretty cute," Reggie mused. "You think we would make cute babies?"
"The cutest," Julie assured him. "Why, you wanna make a couple?"
"Maybe one?" Reggie asks. "The world deserves to have some cuteness left after all, and any child of ours is going to take the lion's share."
Julie laughed hard at that, pulling Reggie in for another kiss. "You're right," she purred against his lips. "Gotta save some cuteness for everyone else. But I'd be okay with trying to make some of our own."
Reggie grinned and pulled her in for a longer, steamier kiss, and they suddenly found a way to spend their lazy morning. And nine months later? The cuteness that was Luna Rose came into the world.
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The fact that doctors wont do shit about my hernia(which has caused life threatning horribly painful intestinal blocks) because im fat is fucking insane still. One of them I saw the first fuckin thing he said to me was that I have to get bariatric surgery or they wont fix it
So the hernias just. A ticking time bomb.
They wont investigate my nausea or chronic anemia either. Or my headaches. Or do shit about my tmj.
I have to frequently push the hernia back in myself! It fucking sucks!
Like. Imagine having to frequently push your own fucking insides back into place. Daily. And the doctors wont help unless you stop being fat
That is what ive been going thru for years
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