#Well to be fair he always has a /dies tragically young/ vibe going

[wilsonthemoose]

Luna deserved better T.T

[echoghost1]

EchoGhost's Phic Phight 2021 Master Post

And in case you missed any, or just like seeing the whole gang together, here is every single fic I wrote for my first ever Phic Phight!

1) Perseverance

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: While Maddie is helping Danny with his homework a notification from his phone becomes a major distraction.

Prompt: PR134 - Danny is sitting quietly next to someone. Maybe he's doing homework with his friends, maybe Jazz is driving him somewhere, maybe he's working on a group project with someone, maybe he's doing something else entirely. He suddenly starts *freaking* the heck out - Perseverance has just landed on Mars, and he just found out about it. How is his reaction perceived by whoever he's with?

2) The Reason You Wail

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: An odd feeling he can't quite explain is haunting Danny. He wants it to stop but he knows it won't, he just knows now.

Prompt: PR054 - As Danny gets older, he doesn't just predict the appearance of ghosts. He starts predicting when someone's going to die.

3) Forget Your Life Story

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Danny woke up with no memory. He didn’t even know his own name. The doctor told him it would come back and his parents were there to help him. He trusts them, even if he doesn't recognize them. Even if some things didn’t quite line up.

Prompt: PR002 - Danny woke up from being in a month long coma with no memory of how he got there or anything about his past. Thankfully, the doctors said that his memory would return eventually, and he had his loved ones nearby to tell him who he was and his life story. However, as his memory slowly returns, there's huge, distinct differences between what he's been told and the things he's remembering.

4) Recreational Botany

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: It wasn't her fault. She was merely curious, had only wanted to help. She didn't mean for this to happen. She just hoped it would wear off soon. (TW: Drug use - Weed)

Prompt: PR228 - Ghost weed.

5) Fool’s Errand (Ghost Prince AU)

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: It had been hours since Danny flew off to fight Pariah Dark and Vlad took it upon himself to see what was taking the boy so long.

Prompt: PR065 - After their fight, Pariah Dark decides Danny has all the qualities he wants in an heir and forcibly adopts him. (Danny can either lose the fight to put him back in the Sarcophagus, or Pariah can get out again later.)

6) You Walked Right Into This

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Sometimes walking is more than just walking. (TW: Child Abuse)

Prompt: PR142 - Jack and Maddie seriously injure Danny Fenton, resulting in him being at their mercy and revealing he’s not exactly human. Now the parents have to decide wether to help him... or finish what they started. TW for serious injury and probably gore and angst.

7) What You Fear The Most (Scary Ghost Form AU)

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: What if his ghost form was less human-looking? What if he looked every bit the monster his parents had always told him ghosts were?

Prompt: PR035 - Monstrous: AU where Danny's ghost form is monstrous and grotesque. On one hand, he doesn't have to worry about anyone recognizing him; on the other, it might be even harder to convince people that he's a good guy

8) Parallels

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: It's amazing the things you learn on a field trip.

Prompt: PR047 - Wacky reveals (ex: Danny drying up too quickly bc intangibility, Danny's drink stays cool way too long, people's electronic devices are always more charged when they've been near Danny, etc)

9) Cast Into Obsidian (Blind AU)

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: The accident sent Danny to the hospital due to the damage to his eyes.

Prompt 01: PR092 - Write a more traditional ghost story. How would things change if ghost powers weren’t super powers, but closer to old horror movie tropes?

Prompt 02: PR259 - The Accident didn’t turn Danny into a half ghost, but instead allowed him to see, hear, and physically interact with the very real ghosts that are now pouring through the portal (Alternative: Danny’s always been clairvoyant, but after the accident he finally sees all of the ghosts he’d grown up talking to)

10) Where The Lines Overlap (Parallels part 2)

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Maddie wants to know what her son has been keeping from her and today he finally decides to tell her. (TW: Outsider POV of PTSD flashbacks)

Prompt: PR091 - When he told his parents the truth, Danny had only ever bothered thinking about the stress of potential dissection. With that out of the way, and his secret fully accepted, he realised that there were a lot of unexpected things to adjust to... Write about something funny or awkward as the Fentons learn to live with a half ghost son!

11) Quoth the Librarian, “But I’m Alone?”

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Eleanor loved her job at the school library. She always made sure to come in early to make sure everything was just right before the students came. Today something beat her there.

Prompt: PR234 - Suddenly, there was a knock at the door...

12) The Baldr to My Odin (Ghost Prince AU part 2)

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Pariah has recently acquired a son and wants to get to know him better.

Prompt: PR121 - Pariah Dark wakes up from his slumber and tries to live a peaceful existence in his castle practicing his swordsmanship and rebuilding his castle with all modern luxuries. But ghost from the ghost zone keep trying to challenge him to become king.

13) Tagged

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Dr. Flora Santos and her partner Dr. Carlos Rodriguez have lucked out as they have finally caught their most elusive subject.

Prompt: PR090 - Something physical happens to Danny’s body that makes it impossible to keep his secret identity, well, secret.

14) The Paleontologist and The Princess (Dino boy AU)

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Danny had one true passion; Paleontology. So can anyone really blame him for getting excited when he thinks he comes face to face with a dinosaur? Even if it isn't a dinosaur after all.

Prompt: PR139 - "Actually, Dad? I wanted to be a paleontologist."

15) Lost In Transmission

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: There's a Ghost Expo happening at Casper High and Danny thinks it'll be fun to see all the incorrect ways people try to find ghosts. He learns the hard way that just because is old, doesn't mean it doesn't work.

Prompt: PRO58 - Casper high is holding a supernatural expo. Supposed paranormal experts are gathered in their gym to show off their expertise. Thinking it'll be a flop, since most employ methods that aren't modern, Danny and his friends go for fun. Only, it turns out that traditional ghost hunting techniques are more efficient than they seem.

16) Dark Familiarity (Role Swap AU)

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Danny has been hunting ghosts for a while now. He has been ever since they ruined his life and a mysterious package arrived with everything he needed to exact his revenge. (TW: Character Death)

Prompt: PR095 - Danny and Valerie role swap (but not personality swap!!). How does Valerie fair as a ghost? How does Danny do as a ghost hunter (and what motivates him to do it in the first place?) [Shipping them is fine, but gen fics are preferred!]

17) I’ve Felt It Too

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Ember's having a bad day and Danny tries to help.

Prompt: PR079 - Phantom looked at Ember. Her eyes filled with tears. She gnashed her teeth and screamed. "You don't know what it's like."

And Phantom, with a heavy sigh whispered. "Yeah, I do..."

18) Repair All Of The Damage (Undead Danny AU)

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: After the tragic loss of her son, Maddie vows to bring him back. No matter what. (TW: Death of a child)

Prompt: PR088 - tw; death of a child?

The Fentons had their daughter sure but they always wanted a son. due to an accident or complication with their son, Danny, died. They decide to put their ghostly knowledge to use and try to summon the spirit of their son back to them. They are ghost scientists. they know how to contain them after all. How much time that has passed between the death and the 'summoning' is up to you!

19) Out Of This World (And Into The Next)

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: What if when Danny first fought the Lunch Lady ghost she actually noticed how young he was. What if she didn't know he was more than just another ghost? What if when she commented on how underweight he was, she decided to help him?

Prompt 01: PR113 - Danny has an existential crisis because he’s dead

Prompt 02: PR242 - somehow, he's gotten younger

20) Spirit Versus Spunk

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Mr. Lancer isn't sure how he's supposed to be reacting to what he's seeing, but seeing as he's the adult here, he better make up his mind.

Prompt: PR019 - Danny and Wes Weston fight over a harmless ghost. This happens during a ghost attack.

21) The Group Project From Hell

AO3 or Tumblr

Summary: Danny and Tucker get stuck working with someone that they really don’t want to

Prompt: Everyone hates group projects, and that’s even if you like your group members. Tucker, Danny, and Elliot/Gregor all get teamed up for a group project, and Tucker and Danny need to refrain from killing him.

And as an added bonus I did make a Spotify playlist for this too! There's a song for each fic that I felt best fit the vibe of each story.

[ermuellert]

what are your honest opinions on julian draxler's career?

personally i thought he was genuinely going to be a big star because he was this young wonderkid at schalke who won the world cup as a 20 year old (he didn't do much though to be fair) but it never really turned out that way ... he's not done terribly per se, he is playing for psg, living that sweet life en france, and somehow still getting callups to the german national team but i am just kind of sad that he never reached the full potential that he had ... i thought he would be the captain of the "new" germany generation, one of the leaders, but now he barely gets to play ... i am kind of extra worked up about his case because he seems like a nice and sweet person as well ... anyways maybe i just have a bad track record of predicting career trajectories, all the youngsters i thought would succeed haven't (yet), at one point i believed that julian weigl and max meyer would also be world beaters and here we are ... i don't know what it is, probably a mix of injuries, bad luck, and maybe just not working hard enough ... long long sigh

anyways if you read all that you're an absolute superstar because i really went and wrote an essay oops ... i look forward to your live blogging tomorrow as it is always entertaining ... lots of love xxx

i hope u know that deep down.... like. Deep Down... i am always always always craving to talk about julian...... like trust me... i promise essays on monsieur draxler are always welcome here because i used to write that much about him and sometimes still think that much about him too...

objectively speaking, i think he is doing alright! pretty good by a lot of standards probably, for most of the reasons u listed. he’s getting paid obscene amounts (probably more than he deserves at this moment in time), has a seemingly great personal life, and as u said, still getting his national team callups. 

my personal thoughts, on the other hand, are... well....... not really of the same sentiment. i already know i’m gonna write up an even longer essay so let me just tuck the rest of this ramble under a cut for the sake of my followers lmao

honestly for me... thinking about julian is kind of depressing. if you feel worked up about him, just know that i relate. he seems very happy where he is in his life at the moment and so of course i’m happy for him too but compared to the potential it seemed he had... it’s just a bit sad. mostly because it isn’t as though he’s an excellent player hindered by injuries (e.g. reus) or anything really beyond his control - i think a lot of what’s so disappointing about his career trajectory is really just to do with him and him only.

yes, his failed transfer to juve back when he was at schalke wasn’t his fault but to move to wolfsburg? i know hindsight is 20/20 but i almost wish he’d just stayed at schalke. the drama he got into while he was at wolfsburg really did not do any good for his image, putting aside the fact that he was putting in average (even inconsistent) performances for the team. at schalke, maybe he could’ve had more time to develop within a team he grew up in and just use his time there to work and work hard. (there’s something i want to say about mentality here but i’ll bring that up later)

then, when his transfer to psg was announced, i felt like that was some beacon of hope although honestly, i think anything compared to wolfsburg could’ve looked that way to me at the time lmao keeping up with that club just for him (and partly andré schürrle) was fucking painful my god

at psg he was off to a decent start and things were starting to look up! wasn’t starting every single match but he was playing fairly well and made quick friends with his new teammates (u know who lol) etc. but then of course any sort of rhythm/momentum he gained was totally thrown off by mbappé’s and neymar’s arrivals which i think were both only around half a year after his transfer. 

and so basically since then, he’s been “competing” for a spot with ney, kylian, and di maría.

(ok reading that back i realize that whole recap of his career was not really necessary or at least. making it as lengthy as i did wasn’t but. i’m too lazy to go back and reword everything so bear with me lmao)

taking all that into account, i think yes, to some extent, he has some excuse for the stagnation of his career. he’s had his injuries and he’s been played out of position for large portions of time.

but i think what really frustrates me about him is that as a fan who’s loved him for years it’s really sad to see that what’s holding him back is not necessarily a lack of ability but just that he doesn’t have the sort of drive i wish he did. it’s been on display in his performances before - he can be lazy and invisible - but i think what’s worse is how that translates off the pitch. he’s just never really seemed to fight for a spot in the starting eleven. and if the rumors are true (as they do seem so) the parisian nightlife has not been doing him very good lmao

not only that though but i think he just doesn’t care as much about football as he does about ... image? money? i don’t know. i don’t know what the word i’m looking for is. i don’t think julian is a superficial sort of person and i’m not saying ambition is a bad thing at all, but when he couldn’t go from schalke to juventus (and that failed transfer was riding, presumably, a lot on his wonderboy status at schalke), he followed the money to wolfsburg. put in performances that understandably received criticism at wolfsburg, then very publicly made a whole thing out of wanting to leave and not being able to. then followed the money to psg where he just ... vibes on the bench. well, at least up until this season. but even then, if it weren’t for all the covid cases and red cards, i don’t know if he would be playing as much as he has. 

so tl;dr: i love julian a lot still and he’s still the same sweet dorky fuckboi-ish guy i’ve been a fan of since the start and i’m happy that he’s happy! the tragic irony is that what makes him happy - collecting checks while being a bench player - is also what depresses me quite a bit about him. he has his flashes of brilliance every once in a while where you can see that 17-year-old schalke wonderboy in him, so you know that hype from long ago wasn’t all a waste and that somewhere in there is a very talented, perhaps starworthy footballer. but he isn’t. not because he can’t but because he doesn’t really care to. and not in a dismissive sense i don’t think. i don’t think he thinks “ah who cares about being the best player in the world fuck that” but moreso in the sense of “ah i think i’m doing alright! that’s good enough for me.” and that sort of mentality is what places him (or at least, contributes to his position being) a tier below his peers who have proven themselves (e.g. kimmich, although that also brings up the whole “can that sort of fighter/die-on-the-pitch type mentality be taught or must it be inherent” kind of thing so let’s move on before i write an essay within this essay) at the end of the day i know not every footballer is in this sport simply for the sake of playing it, but from time to time thinking about him fills me with a lot of nostalgia and yes a tinge of disappointment because i can’t help but think of what could’ve been (i.e. what would’ve happened if he’d stayed at schalke? stayed there for good or stayed for a season or two more, developed even more hype, strengthened his abilities. had a successful transfer to a good, solid club and continued to hone his abilities, etc).

ok. now i’m done. i’m so sorry for putting u through all that and skimming this back i sound SO dramatic lmao but man i’ve been through like six-ish years of following his career so fuck it oh well

also if u wanna know how much i still care, know that after the “draxler to leeds united” rumors first dropped, i wrestled with my impulse control every single day for a week trying to stop myself from dming him on insta saying “i love you but get ur ass to leeds or i will kidnap u and get u there myself your football career is killing me but i love you and just want the best for u have a nice day xx”

[mixedracefairy]

A Reylocentric review of Episode IX

*HELLA SPOILERS*

DON'T READ IF YOU'VE NOT SEEN STAR WARS: THE RISE OF SKYWALKER!

(I'm from London get used to the slang)

I liked:

• I just liked how one of many Snokes was in like a Matrix incubator, lit and mysterious idea - that Palpatine was behind the creation of Ben. Did he bun not being able to find Rey and then switch to Vader's line as I assume Ben wasn't hard to find? Had to use Snoke otherwise Final Order and resurgence would be revealed. Cool.

• Opening with Ren POV establishes him as a big man and dark don and Palpatine is butters like whatever you think of Ben/Ren all man can get behind hating on Palpy.

• The whole 'lads we best sort this out or we're totally fucked' plot - Palpatine is back with a surrender or be destroyed motive

• The promise of destiny to Ren if man ends Rey cos it makes them mortal enemies. However you sense he won't cos she's wifey but the dichotomy is bare hypey. (That sounds silly. It does however, best express my feelings to the situ.)

• Him chasing her all 'I am gonna turn you to the dark' - it's exciting that he has a desire for her, it's also exciting that she's like aight calm and carries on with her ting with the boiz

• Rey's vision - the potential in the force for her to rule with Kylo Ren and be dark side. Wild.

• Rey's heritage revealed - that she comes from a lineage of great power and great darkness. At first it was cool that she was a nobody and Ren like a prince because of the class contrast and their bond, but this reveal makes her almost greater than Ren, eligible to be empress. Literally the bottom to top. Lit.

• Moments of proximity, there's a momentum building, the bond between them and it's exciting to anticipate their presence together and what might come if it

• The duel of wills over the transporter, demonstrating equal power. (Luke saber 2.0)

• Her shock at her power, losing control/unawareness of might - Rey fearing her power and destiny. Rey also being how the Skywalker twins learn from their mistakes of not fearing (Ben's) power

• Their force bonds - moments where she outsmart him, him with the position in power searching for her on the ground but she's in his quarters. There's always been something hypey about the FO/Empire with their might vs RA/Resistance underdogs and our boiz winning, but never in a situation where they're bonded and he's literally searching for her to wifey.

• Lowkey role reversal cos he's tryna tell her who she is, albeit for his own purposes, and she's in denial and responds by attacking him. The 'I'm angry so I'm gonna hack at things with my lightsaber' is usually a Ren move.

• You can't tell if they want to kill each other, (cos you can tell they wanna fuuuh). Ren races at her with his speeder, she cuts off his wing; in their heated duel they let each other recover yet she seizes the opportunity to kill him. She then heals him as the occasion is a mutual mourning. Confessing wanting to take his hand, Ben's hand.

• The way Rey and Ren dance around each other, Rey flying off his star base. Man all like rah, bae swerved again.

• They did 3PO dirty! It's gucci tho for the Groot-esque bant.

• Ren's abandoning of the dark side moment was feeling keenly the loss of his mother, indicating he had a love for her and somewhere a desire to return to the light or a safety/relaxedness that his opposition was headed by her. Almost like he was protecting as much as seeming to destroy her cause. 

• It reminded him of how he lost his father by his hand, their love haunts him as somewhere he felt he belonged but was ashamed to return to because of Snoke (Palpatine's) corruption. Her death is a loss of hope for his sometime redemption or organising of the galaxy between those who backed the Resistance and First Order. 

• The memory of Han convinces Ben Leia's cause still lives if he decides to take it up, showing he did care for her and what she stood for. He just felt lost to it, hurt, unbelonging, bitter and abandoned by it. Yet he believed in himself and his destiny for greatness, (which you have to rate), so man was like dark side it is. (Wow, what a gangster.) 

• It's a bit like Leia's death freed him of the shame of wanting to be light because he needn't face their judgement, or more, the pain of their undeserved love and forgiveness.

• Lowkey Harry Potter vibes like when Harry's nemesis kills him but doesn't die but the horcrux part did. Han says "Kylo Ren is dead" after he is stabbed by his own saber - the pursuit of darkness that was destroying him has been killed (with compassion for Leia?)

• Leia's arc from episide IV has been lit. After her death, Poe feeling unqualified and Lando saying they all of them weren't ready, you deep how young, (what literally 17?), Leia since day has been taking initiative, being a leader. What a champion and woman all the galaxy has looked up to. And telling silly flyboys to put their cocks away, yet still she believed in and elevated Poe (who has learnt and developed).

• Force heal 1 was a nice indicator of her capability and just a nice touch of her approach of kindness to problem solving, like Leia to her flyboys - put your cocks away. Also dope how Finn prees it and backs her.

• What the hell was Finn going to tell Rey before they sank?

• Yo the way man ended Hux was lit! Pusssyyyy

• Ben's redemption, how he went after Rey to rescue/fight with her as Han's son.

Fresh 👏 garms

• The parallels of Ben and Rey both ditching their saber was cool. Not sure why, like they're both on the wavelength of 'fuck this shit' haha. Except Ben ditches his to step into his true self, what he was trying to do since day, and Rey ditches hers to deny herself. Good thing Luke was about to say who you are is what you make of yourself. A bit like the answerless mirror cave from VIII.

• I like old Luke. I like what a cynical c*nt he is hahaha

• Ben abandoned his saber as it represented Kylo Ren and darkness. Was it foolish to take just a blaster? Tbf he is the don with the force so maybe he thought he was gucci. Force swap was sick tho.

• Pretty cool that their force bond is so powerful it could renew Palpatine's power as it shows how precious it is. Also mad tragic that that is their downfall, they stood no chance against him. But surely if it could renew him it could end him? Two yung padawans couldn't really take on big man like Palpy so fair.

• There were some excellently convincing moments all round of loss of hope - 'they're done fuuucked' moments. Poe in his X wing, Rey staring into force lightning etc.

• Was it stupid that Ben went to Rey? It's obviously instinctive he ain't gonna snake bae now they're not opps. Without him there Palpatine never would have been renewed tho. Rey however remains pure and not a Sith, so did he come to protect her innocence? Fits in with the literary themes and tropes of fairytales that the whole idea of them comes from. 

• I mean if he hadn't come Rey would be Sith empress and really how bad would that be? She'd probably have Ben beside her thus fulfilling the vision she had. What Sith vows must she have taken in order to become empress, (to save the mandem obvs), because she could technically marry Ben who would rule in light and she in darkness. That would be badass af, an unwilling Sith empress.

• Rey's fulfilling of destiny, saving the galaxy etc. I mean obviously it's dope when a hero steps into her role. She chose, like Ren, to ignore her past but in this case for good (because she had the bravery to believe she was not isolated, she was loved, unlike Ben). 

• Her battle has been one of self worth and belonging and she believed she belonged to a Jedi family, worthy to have all Jedi behind her, despite her searching for a family to give her life meaning and finding the truth is literally the opposite of what might help her in this battle. She gave all her power/life for the galaxy.

• Ben gave his life for her, completing his redemption in a Christ-like ultimate love sacrifice. We also catch a first smile and oh me lawd it is my favourite thing in the whole three trilogies. That transfer of life, joy, love, kiss, death was just perfection. Po👏et👏ry. 

• Fuck man. She was his only joy. Raaah

• Also because she died for the galaxy, he died to give her life, it's like he took the L for the galaxy instead, but also allowing our young female protagonist from ends the glory and not the star prince with a bad white male privilege temper and climb to power.

• Leia didn't become one with the force til Ben was redeemed. That's deep. Was that why Ben turned? His scar is now healed, suggesting the betrayal of patricide and how that weakened him instead of making him Kylo Ren is mended by Rey. He's no longer split in two?

• What's the symbolism of giving her life by putting your hand there Ben? I see you Disney, you gotta keep it PG but I see you

• At the end, when she's asked what her name is, it would have been cool if she was like Rey Palpatine and I overcame the meaning of the name, I know who I am. But it was fitting, you could sense it - and the force ghosts what a touch - she was a Skywalker. Her fam have been Leia, Luke and Han, and her soulmate should they have been married would make her Skywalker too. Technically Rey Solo which also fits because it's the same reason Han chose the name cos man didn't know who they belonged to, except she's not alone, she belongs as a Skywalker.

• Obviously Rey and Ben raising little babies as heirs to the empire would have been dope but Ben's death atones for his atrocities as well as makes for poetic writing. 

• Rey returns to nothing, which is cool cos her parents obviously must have been eligible to be heirs to the empire and also chose to be nothing. So it's significant, not anticlimactic. It's humbling, which in the trope of heroes is radical.

• This is a statement that autocracies like the Final Order don't belong in the galaxy, but people power can take down star destroying fleets. (Shame about UK politics not being people power taking down hope destroying elites but ok.)

• Oi what does that gold lightsaber mean? It's cool still.

• Leia and Luke, like Rey, show a natural instinct for the light, as if to say humans are naturally loving without influence of darkness. (Ffs Darth Sidious)

• Both Rey and Ben have the same dark then light genealogy. Rey actively seeks out the light (VIII) and is denied it and genuinely fears her potential for darkness eventually. Ben is moulded to darkness despite his natural light. When they face big man Darth Sidious they're both at a point of comfort in their identities, they both believe they have a right to the light side because of who they are and the choice they are making.

• What's the new mask phase all about?

• Ben's arc is dope - you meet Kylo Ren and he's scary and powerful, then lol at mask off moment, you're a likkle yout! Then find he desperately wants to prove himself and becomes a vulnerable manchild, his act of patricide fostering a softer side which we connect to through Rey, taking leadership and then throwing that in the trash to be, like Rey, a nobody. It's like reverse Vader, also because instead of unwittingly killing his missus he wittingly gives his life for her.

• Lit trilogy 👏 bun the haters. Them man don't understand 😙👌

[three--rings]

tonyglowheart replied to your post “Untamed rewatch eps 12-15”

listen: the translated subs for Wuji I see. are so. ...bad. I'm going to say it, bad

some poor soul made a whole entire gifset edit with the Tencent translation and I was like. you poor dear. I feel for you so much :')

I'm still wrangling my way through a working translation of Wuji; the biggest difficulty is there is a bunch of... poetic imagery that doesn't translate to sentences in EN because they're not story lyrics, they're more poetic lyrics, so you have lines that are sentence structure, and then lines which are just poetic imagery :')

that specific line is more like... (metaphorically, I'd say) prepare a pot of [very difficult to translate easily phrase] to memorialize the youth (but with the vibe of young lad) the difficult phrase literally is "life and death, sorrow and joy" but the second part is the first half of an idiom which refers to "joys and sorrows, partings and reunions" or "vicissitudes of life" so I guess vicissitudes of life and death, not just life

and I think the idea of preparing a pot of something is tied to the idea of preparing an offering, like you would for at a shrine or for a funeral or if you're visiting a relative's grave because the "memorialize" here could be either hold a memorial ceremony, or like to offer a sacrifice as to a god or ancestor (which ties to CN cultural ancestor worship practices, so you get that gives it that crossover funereal/offering tie if you're trying to translate it)

and I think the idea of preparing a pot of something is tied to the idea of preparing an offering, like you would for at a shrine or for a funeral or if you're visiting a relative's grave because the "memorialize" here could be either hold a memorial ceremony, or like to offer a sacrifice as to a god or ancestor (which ties to CN cultural ancestor worship practices, so you get that gives it that crossover funereal/offering tie if you're trying to translate it)

(I think the ancestor worship is more of a traditional/in-the-past kind of thing, I think it's tied to modern beliefs but I think you have less people who are literally practicing ancestor-worship these days. but you'll see it a lot in period media or even fantasy, just like how you see old European practices mirrored in western fantasy media)

idk that line always hits me pretty hard in the original Chinese lol, it's got this whole... kind of world-wise melancholy meaning to it, the idea that you're gathering the vicissitudes of life and death because that makes a fitting sacrifice/offering/memorial for a young lad, really brings this idea that this youth died far too young, which is already tragic, but in the time he lived he lived too hard and too fast and had to learn more about the perils of the world than

*perils of the world and the extremes of how high and how low circumstances can get than you'd expect from someone of his age and it just really hits home the like.... idea that this kid was a child of war and had to see far too much for his young age, and also he died tragically young...... or like at least that's the meaning/mood I get from the line :')

Slow Clap for epic reply that I mostly just want to document because it’s so informative.  Honestly, my attitude to the songs has mostly been “well that’s obviously a bad translation and it’s probably really hard to translate so I’m gonna mostly ignore the lyrics.”  I mean, I LOVE “Wuji” or as I think of it, the drama version of “Wangxian.”  It’s my favorite version and I’ve totally listened to the instrumental on repeat while writing.  I also love the vocal performances on it, but I mostly just listen without understanding and ignore the subs.  

To be fair, I’m pretty sure Mr. Rings also understood it was a bad translation and just was laughing at it.  I’ve pointed out other moments of bad/awkward lines and he has just waved them off a “translation issue” so he gets it.  

Interestingly, when I googled the lyrics I found this translation by someone which is specifically not a literal translation and thought it was pretty.  The line in question is translated as “Teach these young ones life and death’s joy and grief “ which misses the funereal connections you bring up, but is a nice thought.

Poetry and song is always going to be close to impossible to translate because it’s so subjective.  Do you prioritize literal meaning, metaphorical meaning, cultural ideas, meter and rhyme?  I think there’s a point at which you can only really appreciate poetry if you can read the original language at least a little.  (My experience is with French Poetry, if it’s not obvious from naming my fics after Baudelaire lines.)

I actually somewhat intentionally didn’t bring up the subs in my last rewatch post but yeah now the Viki subs are starting to annoy me more with their Constant Translating of things better left in pinyin.  Like Xuanwu as “black tortoise” and Dafan Mountain as “Great Brahma Mountain” and Zidian as “purple lightning” without even capital letters to make it clear that it has a Name.   And then there’s things that change the tone like saying “tease” instead of “flirt” in the cave when talking about MianMian. It seems like Tencent has the more shippy subs which is weird as an official source versus fan subs.

If I weren’t watching with Mr. Rings I’d probably try switching to You Tube, but I don’t want to confuse him.  

[jessisreadingblog-blog]

Pet Sematary (1989) - movie review

This week I finished re-reading “Pet Sematary” and right afterwards I re-watched the 1989 movie.

The book review is already up and, as promised, here’s the movie review!

Please be aware that this review is FULL of spoilers for both the book and the movie – you’ve been warned 😉

 Main differences between the book and the movie

After the Creeds’ arrival in Ludlow´, Gage gets stung by a bee in the book, which leads to the introduction of Jud, who pulls out the bee sting. The movie is a bit more dramatic and foreshadowing. While Ellie has her little accident with the tire swing, everyone is focused on her and Gage walks to the road and almost gets hit by a truck but is saved by Jud. This is not a bad change at all. However, what I found a little weird is Rachel’s reaction. Yes, she’s relieved and thanks Jud, but if this had been my kid, I would have been a lot shakier afterwards, especially after being on the edge already after the long drive and Ellie falling off the swing … Considering how Rachel usually reacts to the potential of someone dying, this came across as a little weird. 

Norma, Jud’s wife, is not in the movie. Instead they kill off Missy Dandridge, who’s a completely different character than the kind lady who watches the kids sometimes and is very much alive in the end of the book. In the movie she doesn’t die of a heart attack, like Norma, but, believing she has cancer, she hangs herself.  That’s an acceptable change, too. In the movie they only have so much time, so it’s ok to leave out Norma’s storyline, although I’m sure that no one really cares about Missy’s death as I cared about Norma’s death in the book. She’s not really likeable, which is a pity. They could have made her just a little nicer, interact with the kids once or twice, to make people actually care before killing her.

It’s not dark when Jud finds Church dead and it’s still day when they head for the Micmac burial ground. I first thought this was a bad idea – it’s much less creepy – but I guess it was done because it made the next time, when Louis brings Gage there, more effective. I still don’t really like it, this scene had much more potential. For me Louis’ two walks to the burial ground were by far the creepiest scenes in the book. The wild, hysterical laugh of the Wendigo never fails to make me shudder, no matter how often I read this book. In the movie there are just some weird sounds that could probably really be birds.

Speaking of the Wendigo: There’s no Wendigo in the movie! In fact, there’s no background story to the burial ground at all. We only know that “the ground went sour”, for whatever reason.  I would have liked the background story and the menacing presence of the Wendigo.

The cairns on the burial ground don’t look like someone dug himself out as they are described in the book.

When Church comes back, he’s more aggressive than in the book. I have no idea why Louis lets this thing anywhere near his kids. At the same time, he isn’t at all clumsier or dumber like he is in the book, but it’s difficult to have a cat act like that so I get it.  

The same goes for Spot, Jud’s dog. When Jud tells Louis about him in the book, he says that Spot always remained a good dog. When he came back from the dead and scared Jud’s mother it was just by standing there and cornering her, by accident or on purpose.

In the movie he growls at her – and again, I have no idea why they kept that thing until he died of old age. And if the dog was so aggressive, why in the world would Jud tell Louis to bury his cat there, knowing there are two small children in the household? Even the dark power of the burial ground couldn’t convince me that that’s a good idea.  

The story about Timmy Baterman, the young man who died in WWII was brought back to life by his father when Jud was still a young man, is far creepier in the book. In the movie he’s just this savage, dumbed down version of a human, kind of like a zombie. He even chews on a little girl’s leg! By the way: I’m so confused about that! Did he dig it out of a grave or did he kill the girl to get it? And if it’s the latter – why doesn’t Jud mention that he didn’t just walk creepily back and forth in their town, scaring housewives, but also stole and ate little girls? Anyway, in the book he’s malicious and knows the darkest secrets about everyone, playing mind games with Jud and his friends, and Jud uses the word “demon” to describe him.  

Timmy’s end is also very different. In the movie the men from the town set the house on fire with Timmy and his father in it. Bill, the father, tries to get himself and Timmy out, but Timmy drags them both into the flames, which makes it seem like he himself prefers death.  In the book it’s Bill himself who kills Timmy, sets the house with both of them in on fire and then shoots himself. That solution is far better. The book tries to give the girl-eating, housewife-scaring zombie thing without the demon vibe a tragic touch. Of course that tragic touch is also there in the book but the demon, or whatever it is in Timmy’s body, doesn’t commit suicide.

After Gage’s death, the movie version of Louis goes to the cemetery by bright daylight and stores his grave robbery equipment there. Isn’t that a bit risky? The place must have great power indeed to back up so much stupidity.

In the book Louis only sees Pascow once after his death, namely in his “dream” from which he wakes up with dirty feet (in the book he reacts to that far more strongly, which I missed a bit in the movie). Later, after Gage’s death, only Ellie sees him in her dreams. In the movie Rachel feels his presence, too, as he’s trying to make her go home and get there more quickly, so she’s potentially able to help Louis. Not the best idea from the beyond as it turns out, and in the end it makes Ellie an orphan, but nobody’s perfect, not even the helpful spirits.  

When Gage comes back, he’s different in the movie than he is in the book. Thankfully, he’s not like the movie version of Timmy Baterman but the mind games are fare more harmless, which is again due to the age of the young actor and understandable.

In the book, a moment before his death, Gage is himself once more, calling out to Louis with the word “Daddy”, which literally made me cry. In the movie he walks away from Louis, looking like a sulking kid (which isn’t bad either) and says “Not fair”, and before he dies, he growls again, showing that he’s not at all himself. For me that’s not nearly as intense but it doesn’t ruin anything.

When Louis carries Rachel away from Jud’s house and towards the woods, he again encounters Pascow, who tries to talk sense into him one last time. In the book it’s Louis’ colleague and friend who finds him, but he doesn’t play any role in the movie, so it makes sense that he doesn’t show up there.

What I liked

The actors are great, especially Jud. He’s exactly like I always picture him reading the book. Gage and Ellie are adorable, which makes Gage’s death and Ellie’s mourning and fear for her father even more intense. Dale Midkiff (Louis) may not be the best actor int he world but he’s not as bad as some say.

The music is perfect and positively creepy. The movie relies mostly on atmosphere and slow build-up.

Zelda! Everything about her is perfect and so scary! Fun fact: She’s played by a man because they couldn’t find a woman who was skinny enough and could still be scary.

The scene of Church coming back is great, with the remains of the plastic bag, in which he was buried, still in his whiskers, just like in the book, and him indeed looking more menacing at Louis than before his death.  

I loved the Stephen King cameo – he’s playing the priest at Missy’s funeral.

At Missy’s funeral Ellie is wearing the marine blue dress she wore at Norma’s in the book; that’s just one of the nice little details they adapted from the book – there are many more.

I very much like how Pascow keeps interfering. He replaces Rachel’s inner struggle in Chicago and on her way home which we wouldn’t be able to see otherwise in the movie.

The second time Louis goes up to the burial ground is well done, with the blue fog and the noises and all. At least up to a certain point which is mentioned in the “What I didn’t like” section.

Gage killing Jud is well-done, even if it’s different from the book.

Except for Pascow following and helping her, Rachel’s way home is faithful to the book. Even the way she meets Gage and her untimely demise is quite faithful, with her first seeing Zelda and all. BUT if a small kid runs towards you with a scalpel openly in hand, no matter if he came back from the dead or not, the first think I would do is take the scalpel out of his hand. In the books he makes the effort of hiding it behind his back. Still, it’s a very good scene.

Gage calling Louis at home, making him realise that he killed Jud and Rachel.

Louis killing Church again is also well-done, and so is Louis killing Gage – this bone chilling little boy’s cry when Louis sticks the needle in his throat is so hard to bear. Just one thing (and I’m really nit-picking now, which is why this is not going to the “What I didn’t like” section): Why is Louis wearing medical gloves when he kills Church? Aren’t we beyond the point of caring about things like that? Also: He doesn’t wear gloves when he kills Gage.

Louis bringing Rachel to the burial ground and waiting for her and her coming back. It’s mostly well done.  

What I didn’t like

This is a minor complaint, but the scenes with Pascow can become a little cheesy at times. At the end of Louis’ “dream” he didn’t have to float away, they could have just zoomed in on Louis and let him wake up. The last scene with Pascow and Rachel was even worse. You know, when she gets out of the truck and he just closes the door and decides to stick with the trucker (why can he do that and most of all – why doesn’t anyone notice?).

Why are there stupid-looking kids standing around in Rachel’s house when she runs down the stairs after Zelda’s death? Can anyone explain that to me? I never understood that. I mean, she was alone with her sister when she died, she says that to Louis, in the book and in the movie. I don’t know about you but creepy neighbourhood kids have no way of entering my home without permission.

Another thing involving Pascow: Before he dies, he says that the soil in a man’s heart is stonier; later Jud repeats that sentence and when Louis is shocked about that we see a flashback to Pascow to remind us that he said it before. I don’t like it when a movie takes me for a fool, I’m perfectly capable of making the connection myself and don’t need cheap tricks like two-second-flashback for that, thank you very much.

When Louis climbs up to the burial ground with Gage in his arms, a jump-scare-face suddenly rushes towards him out of nowhere. Why would the face of a regular guy rush towards him? Is that Jud? Even with the screenshot I’m not sure but I’m starting to think it’s Jud (which never occurred to me in during the scene because it’s so fast). But it doesn’t matter because that would make even less sense. In the book the Wendigo comes so close to him and it’s such a scary scene and yes, he does see a face, but that of a spirit, demon or whatever, not that of a face coming out of nowhere just to make us jump and to look stupid. If they left out the Wendigo, they could have left out that s***, too.

The Gage puppet/doll/whatever this thing is! I get that you can’t make a little child act in scenes like the ones in towards the end, but the puppet thing is just so ridiculous! It always makes me think of Chucky and this is when I can’t take it seriously anymore and everything that might be creepy about a scene is completely ruined. And how did Chucky … I mean Gage … get Rachel’s corpse to the attic to drop it in front of Louis? He might be undead, but he’s still tiny!

Louis waiting for Rachel. Yes, I know, this is in the “What I liked” section, too, but it deserves to be in both. I mean – Louis is setting the alarm clock and right when it rings, Rachel comes back. Really? Has he become such an expert in raising the dead that he knows the exact time they will reappear? He didn’t even see when exactly Church and Gage came back.

Also, his hands are perfectly intact. Like in the book, he brings Rachel to the burial ground without any shovel or whatever to help him dig, so he does it with his bare hands. In the books his hands are ruined, which makes sense, in the movie they’re perfectly fine, which doesn’t make sense. Otherwise, the scene is good!  I didn’t even notice the thing with his hands before I read the novel, by then I had seen the movie twice.  

Is it a faithful adaptation?

Yes, definitely.

Even in very first scene, while the camera slowly moves through the pet cemetery, there’s a voice-over of some of the kids who buried their pets there, reading the inscriptions on the grave markers, which are exactly the same as the ones in the book.

A lot of the dialogue is the same as in the book, word by word.

The story, despite a few changes of which some where necessary because it is a different medium, is mainly the same.

The main characters are very true to their book counterparts, there are so many small details you will notice that are exactly the same in the book.

Is it a good movie?

I think it is. It has a creepy atmosphere, does not rely entirely on jump scares, as so many modern horror movies do, and the soundtrack is perfect! It has its flaws, some scenes have not aged well, but it’s still a very good, atmospheric horror movie and a mostly faithful adaptation to the source material.

The new movie

I am so hyped! Yes, I know the movie won’t be as faithful to the novel as the first one but we already have a faithful adaptation and in some scenes (GAGE PUPPET!) it didn’t work out.

I don’t want the kid to be replaced with a puppet or CGI effects – so it’s such a good thing that Ellie is the one who dies and comes back because the actress playing her will be old enough to do so convincingly. Gage is a good choice for the book and Ellie is a good choice for the movie.

There will be other changes so that even long-term fans like me will be surprised here and there. I will tell you what I think about these changes when I actually saw the movie because right now the only big change we know about for sure is that Rachel will be at home when Ellie comes back, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, the whole to Chicago and back again journey does take a lot of time.

What I also like is that the actress playing Zelda will be younger. In the first movie she’s an adult or almost an adult, in the book she’s only two years older than Rachel, which makes her 10 and therefore the whole story is even more terrifying and tragic. I can’t wait to see how that turns out!

I’m also so happy that the Wendigo will be addressed and I’m really looking forward to see how exactly that will be done.

Long story short: I can’t wait for the movie to come out and I’m not mad about the changes so far!

[themanicgalaxy]

SPN 5X7 the Curious Case of Dean Winchester

O wait I've heard of this one...?

oo nice invocation of them with the apocalypse

ok turns old

ah yes the Mary dying sound

25 year old dying of old age is So Neat tho

ah Bobby!!

Dean...tries

lmAO BOBBY

I love grumpy old man Bobby it's what he deserves

oho Tuesdays?

oOO it sounds like Psych Music

oh it's him but Young, DAMN

D E A N

ah yes the boomer hate my wife thing

WHAT IS XBOX DEAN YOU O L D MAN

ah the LORE

ah yeah he was acting a bit Angrier than normal, he does something

ah he does know doesn't he

heh the 100

damn good job Dean

BOBBY WANTS HIS BEST YEARS BACK UH OH

n O O HE LOST

"you IDIOT" hahahaha

you hypocrite

oh damn but he's FUN

the "ok but disclaimer" was fun

man witch

"make it 50" you're an idiot

I love you idiots

save Bobby first nice nice

ooo NICE visuals

AHAHAHAH OLD DEAN

PALPATINE

JOHN MCAIN

SAM IS ENJOYING THIS AHAHAHA

"shut up Sam" DFAPJAPHAHAHA

lmAO DEAN IS O L D

n o CHEESEBRUGER

HE'S WEARING THE SAME THING AHAHA

yoU'RE OLD

ok no this is fucking hilarious actually

just STEALS HIS CAR

Dean likes him

I get like...Loki and Tony vibes(tho not shipped, I don't know what they're like shipped)

F L O O R 2 AHAHAHA

H'ES ALREADY WINDED

thE FUCKING JAZZ MUSIC

thE FUCKING CATARACTS

ah sh's got magic

bud ur od

dammit 900 year old sexy witch is so MUCH FUN

HE GAVE SAM AN STD OH MY GOD

I’m good, Bobby’s better, we both lost I liked that

“when you get to be our age” “you’re thirty Dean” LMAO

oh BOBBY COMING TO TERMS WITH HIS MORTALITY

He feels old and washed up and he wants a way out

Dean is like…yeah I understand

gf gives them the reversal?? what?

he cursed her to I think?

god I wish I know how to play poker well

ah so he always wins, or he controls the game, I see

It was for Sam’s benefit

Dean’s taking this well

their bitchy banter is so funny

Ah Sam Supremacy right here we go hi kripke

hey maybe that’s why I don’t like him, I don’t like being told this

show don’t tell etc

ahh the hair hiding shadow, neat

a H THEY’RE STALLING HIM! GOOD FINALLY SOME FUCKING EMOTION IN THIS ARBY’S

DNA…oH THE SETUP WITH THE TOOTHPICK

the fucking occult symbols in the back of an Alley is Good

ah he caught them

whaT IS WITH THE GODDAMN NECKLACE

oh goody more stairSS

O H HE BLUFFED HIM

what happened to Dean??

boy the dependence thing is so fucked man

…does he want the game…have some modicum of fairness?

“there’s poker and then there’s suicide” what was he trying to accomplish?

she’s crying

aw Sam…?

Sam + Witches is good actually

oh he wON

AND HE CASHED them in for DEAN “with pleasure”

THE LIL HEEL TAP

oh she outlived her daughter and she hates it

she doesn’t want to live forever oh WOW

wait…was..the plot of this one entirely driven by the lady witch and her choices?

like she wasn’t given a name but STILL

and SHE DIES!

“just lucky” oh fuck…he outwitched him didn’t he

aW DEAN’S TERRIBLE APOLOGY

THE LIL LIP TWITCH THING HE DOES

like an aborted cocky smilE HE DOES WHEN HE’S DESPERATLEY TRYING TO HIDE/WANTS TO

“you’re not useless” oh my god

the literal only way he can say I love you is “I need you”

…this isn’t important at all I promise

he’s like so gruffly trying to get through this speech

and sitting down so they’re eye to eye

fuck me I’m tearing up

no but like he saw it needed to be said, and he said it! I’m so proud! of him!

insert Olivia Rodrigo Hope ur ok in there

and Bobby understood, said Thanks, then poked fun because Emotionsf dsiaoh;sdio

HE WAS TEARING UP

DEAN’S SMILE AT THE END

1 Witch antagonist! ok but I feel like Patrick is such a good case study in a complex but fun villain that is sympathetic, but still clearly the villain! Like it’s very clear he has a moral code(He’ll play some people, he won’t others, he wants an Actual Game, but for what? isn’t it implied he’s in control at all times?) but we’re never actually told what it is, or how it works. Like he’s good at reading people(makes sense he’d pick poker), he clearly wants connection(he wanted the lady witch with him? he doesn’t want to be alone? He clearly knows about the people he’s playing(mentioned the bar mitzvah)(Although was that for Sam’s benefit? did he know that before)) Like we don’t know SHIT about his tragic backstory, but he’s interesting and compelling enough that it literally doesn’t fucking matter. This episode is great, it gives me brainworms, I wanna watch it again

2 lady witch! Ok but…the entire plot was driven by her! She wanted the magic gone due to her own selfish reasons, but it was also like…painted as the objectively right thing to do! all she wanted was not to be immortal anymore, but she didn’t wan to take a central role? The locket makes you think that she’s got some kind of control she’s under(especially coupled with a semi ironic “I look good for my age”), but no, it’s he daughter she had to bury, which would probably fuck up any parent. Like would it be nice to have a name? yes! but she was still cool!!

3 DEAN!! MOTHERFUCKER ACTUALLY COMMUNICATED! Like he clearly understood Bobby’s shit even before, he sat down and he actually tried to feeling! He clearly was super uncomfy with it, but he knew someone had to say it and since no one else was going to, he ended up being the emotionally mature one and! it was great to see!! Was he terrible? YES! it was a godawful apology but Bobby saw what he was trying to say and that seemed to matter to him. plus his lil heel click was absolutely adorable, he was very happy to be younger again. Actually, speaking of, him being old was so fucking funny

4 sam the witch?? Ok listen…they clearly set it up that Sam did Something to win. And we know he has psychic powers, so I assume he outwitched them. He threw his own powers in the ring, and since he’s the antichrist, they worked. It was a subtle use of power, and that’s the head canon I’m going with ok(they clearly set up that he’s emotional, and while him not being read I think is meant to be as like…he ends up being Really Good at Poker cuz he’s a Man, I think it’s more he scrambled Patrick a little bit, due to the powers I swear it would be so good)

like the whole thing about him just being Innately the Hero was annoying, but this lil subtle thing? good! good! I like that!

Listen I like having some shit for interpretation, it helps the Unparalleled Media Experience

5 BOBBY! No but bobby getting to actually have to go through the stages of grief? Bobby getting time to shine as a character, wanting to die or be useful and being told that no, he is useful still(even as fUCKING TERRIBLY AS DEAN DID IT OH MY GOD DUDE). his lil tear up close up at the end that’s open to interpretation? god that was good. Like it feels as if they’re not brushing off what happened to him as they did with Dean going to hell, and it’s So interesting, especially cuz Sam had little reaction, but Dean tried to Feeling about it and it was so good

6 lil obligatory destiel. ok listen..this episode establishes that Dean can only say I love you as “i need you” this will Totally Not Come Back Later I Promise Wink Wink.

7 look the lore of this was fun, the villain was fun(patrick and Dean gave me Dean and Tony vibes a lil, I thought that was neat), the imagery was top notch(occult and fire in an alley? good shit), and him being old was SO FUCKING FUNNY “when you get to be our age” “you’re 30 Dean”

godDAMN THAT WAS GREAT

[katelynrushe26]

Rereading “Remnants”

I want to start this review by adding to an idea from my Everworld review. I speculated that the Scholastic Corporation had been afraid to promote a young adult book series from the late 90's called Everworld, due to it being written by the same authors as Animorphs but possibly being too mature for the same audience. This seems all the more evident now that I've reacquainted myself with Remnants, a third book series that K.A. Applegate and Michael Grant also wrote together. The beginning of every Remnants book features a list of the pair's other Scholastic titles, and while that list includes Animorphs, it doesn't include Everworld.

This could be forgivable, since Remnants was also geared towards a younger audience than Everworld, but the final Everworld book actually promoted Remnants. The finales of both Animorphs and Everworld presented a full-page ad and a chapter-long excerpt from the first Remnants book, and yet only one of them got a shoutout in return when Remnants came out. I still can't say anything for certain, but this one-way "cross promotion" really suggests that Scholastic wanted readers to forget Everworld and embrace Remnants as "the other K.A. Applegate series" instead.

This is ironic for two reasons. The first is that despite its lack of adult content like swearing, sexuality, and alcoholism, Remnants is actually way darker than Everworld in tone. Multiple gruesome character deaths occur in almost every book, and most of the proceedings have a bleak, humorless, mean-spirited vibe to them. The second reason is that despite all of this favorable treatment from its publisher, Remnants really didn't fare much better than Everworld. It only ran for about two years with fourteen books, fell into obscurity afterwards, and has very little information about it available today.

And as someone who tried reading it once before as a teen but didn't get halfway through the series, I have a pretty good idea why.

Remnants tells the story of eighty humans who escape from Earth right before an asteroid destroys the planet. After five hundred years in hibernation, they wake to find they've landed aboard Mother, a deserted alien spaceship that can simulate any environment. The catch is that Mother currently has no operator, and three hostile alien species are fighting the humans to seize control of it. Totally unarmed, the humans have to dodge perils at every turn as they wander the ship's patchwork of environments in search of the command bridge.

At least that's what the first half of Remnants is about. The second half centers around the humans, now more or less in control of Mother, rediscovering what's left of Earth and trying to return to it so they can rebuild the world they lost — all while three mutants in the ship's basement try to overthrow them and use Mother to conquer the universe.

Notice that I didn't mention any character names in that summary. That's because when you get right down to it, Remnants isn't really about its characters. Unlike Animorphs, which was almost entirely character-driven, and Everworld, which was more setting-driven but still had an interesting main cast, Remnants is mostly plot-driven. It's about weird things happening and other weird things being done to resolve them. The characters' emotions are largely glossed over, and while some of them do grow and change throughout the series (at least the ones who survive), their primary role is just to witness and carry out all these bizarre happenings until the main conflict changes again.

To be fair though, here are some of the core characters. The main one is Jobs, a fourteen-year-old computer wiz and romantic idealist who just wants the group to have a home again. There's also his best friend Mo'Steel, a fun-loving adrenaline junkie with an easy-going, can-do attitude; 2Face, a girl with a half-burned face who wants to be a strong leader but is too aggressive, manipulative, and paranoid for her own good; Violet, a sophisticated, no-nonsense art expert who always does her best to help; Yago, a selfish, entitled bully who constantly tries to divide the others so he can control them more easily; Billy, a quiet Chechnyan orphan who goes mad during his hibernation and is the only human able to control Mother; and Tamara, a Marine soldier who gave birth to a creepy, possibly alien baby in hibernation that is now mind-controlling her to do its bidding. Like I said, bizarre happenings.

I should point out that unlike Animorphs and Everworld, which were written in First-Person with a different narrator for each book, Remnants is written in Third-Person with numerous shifts in perspective throughout each book. It could be that this different writing style just makes the Remnants characters seem less personal since it's not what I'm used to from these authors, but I also think that having a lot fewer characters would have done this series a world of good. Most of the characters that I didn't list above are either red-shirts who are just there to get killed or seat-fillers who have nothing to do half the time. Some characters die offscreen in between chapters or even in between books, and one who manages to live through the whole series doesn't get mentioned in the final book's epilogue. The story just seems to forget about him.

The most engaging characters are probably 2Face and Yago. We never quite get the full details of how 2Face got burned, but she sees her disfigurement as sort of a scarlet letter for the "ugly" side of her persona. Eventually, that inner ugliness alienates her from the group, and she becomes so desperate to redeem herself in their eyes that she'll stoop to any low towards the end of the series. She's tragic and despicable all at once, much like her supervillain namesake.

Yago, in contrast, is so over-the-top slimy and egotistical that it kind of gets funny after a while. You can actually love to hate this guy at times, especially in Book 6 when he makes Mother simulate a world where he's the president of the United States. Surprisingly though, the series manages to give him an arc towards the end that leads to some of its few legitimately poignant moments.

But since the plot is the real focus of Remnants, how does that hold up? Well, it holds up fairly well for the first half of the series. The mystery surrounding Mother, Tamara's baby, and the various alien species is all kind of intriguing, and we get just enough answers in each book to keep it that way. Other developments, such as Billy learning to harness Mother and some of the other humans learning that they've gained mutant superpowers, can also make us curious about where the story is going. The climaxes of Books 5-7 are imaginative and exciting, and while the characters don't quite resonate enough to give us an emotional connection to anything, the end of Book 7 still feels like a satisfying achievement.

The second half of the series is where the real trouble starts.

Again, I can't say anything for certain due to the lack of info, but I get the sense that sales for Remnants really started to drop halfway through its run. Books 1-8 have fancy, embossed, metallic lettering for their titles on the front covers, but Books 9-14 have flat, standard printing for theirs. The cover art also starts to look more slapped together after Book 8, and the books themselves start to get shorter on average. It feels like Scholastic saw the writing on the wall and started doing whatever it could to cut corners and wrap up the series as quickly as possible.

But getting back to the plotting, Books 8 and 9 are about the same in quality as the previous ones, even though Book 8 starts with a three-month time jump from the end of Book 7. Book 10, however, is hands down the worst book in the series.

See, Book 9 ends with a mid-battle cliffhanger, and instead of picking up from there, Book 10 jumps ahead another three months and just gives us a summary of how the battle ended. We find out that two somewhat important characters died in the fight, and then a third, more important one also dies pretty much offscreen with little fuss during the events of Book 10. We get two more massive time jumps over the course of the book as the humans sail Mother back to Earth, and then shortly after they land there, a fourth character who was finally starting to get interesting also abruptly dies. And then the book pulls a surprise twist that effectively throws everything the series was about into the garbage. I don't blame K.A. Applegate or Michael Grant for this, since I suspect Scholastic was starting to tighten the vice and I'm fairly sure Book 10 was ghost-written, but reading it made me furious.

Books 11 and 12 have the opposite problem; they try to slow things back down to establish the new characters, setting, and conflict, but they go too far and just drag. I was pretty much ready to pan the entire rest of the series after this point...but then Book 13 came along.

I've heard that this one was also ghost-written, but out of all the Remnants installments, Book 13 feels the most like Applegate and Grant's usual writing style. It's told almost entirely from the perspective of a girl named Tate who got separated from the other humans in Book 10, and it deals with her fighting for survival against the new villain trio in Mother's basement. Survival also happens to be the book's official subtitle, by the way.

This is a character piece first and foremost. It still has a lot of the weird, otherworldly elements you expect from the series, but we're allowed to single in on just one protagonist's view of them and see how she gradually comes to grips with them. The focus is on how those things impact her character, not on the mere fact that they exist and that they're weird. We also get to explore the protagonist's backstory in an open, honest, and meaningful way, and the things that we learn about her from her memories actually factor into her decision making throughout the book. Best of all, the ending throws more of those mind-bending Remnants twists at us, and while they could stand to be better explained, they have a genuine emotional resonance because the book let us properly get to know the character that experiences them. One of Tate's big discoveries at the end of the book even lends emotional weight to the entire scope of the series and makes us understand why it's so important for the characters to try and start a new life on Earth.

Book 13: Survival has Animorphs Chronicles levels of pathos. It's easily the crown jewel of the whole Remnants series, and I wish the rest of the series had been more like it. So it's only fitting that this wonderful exception to every complaint I've ever had about Remnants...is entirely skippable.

I'm not kidding. Everything that Tate accomplishes and discovers in Book 13 gets reexplained to the other characters in Book 14, so you don't even need to read Book 13. Good news for the superstitious readers, I guess.

Book 14, the finale, has the same problem as Books 11 and 12, plus it barely ties up any of the loose ends from all the mysteries that the series built up. One character gets a thought-provoking ending to their arc, another major one dies offscreen, and everyone else gets an ending that's earned, I guess, but the tone of it doesn't feel consistent with the overall series. In fact, I question if it was even Applegate or Grant's idea.

Despite this, I am glad that I finally went back and read all of Remnants. There was a gem or two in there, and when the series was imaginative, it was extremely imaginative. However, I think it's more interesting as a case study in how constant corporate deadlines and pressure can wear down a project. At least that's what I have to deduce it's a case study in. I'll always have the utmost respect for K.A. Applegate and Michael Grant, and while I do believe that Remnants could have been better under more ideal circumstances, I'm willing to view the series itself as the ultimate testament to its thesis: that no matter how disastrous things get, there's always a chance of something good surviving.

But seriously, Everworld is better.

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