#War Thunder Forums

[typingatlightspeed]

Metal Gear Fanfic - Thunder

Hal discovers another metal gear leak, in perhaps the most obvious of places. A very stupid fic with a very stupid joke. Ao3 Link! @tarisbackyard made a joke about this months ago and I knew then I needed to write a silly lil ficlet of it, lol.

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The frantic clicking of Hal's laptop mouse and absence of any other active sound was what alerted Snake to the fact that something was amiss.

Typically, even when deeply engrossed in work, a flurry of sound tended to accompany Hal's computer activity. He usually listened to something, background noise to help him focus in the form of some 80s city pop or an episode of a mecha OVA, rarely actually paid attention to. When Snake was doing something in the same room, he'd wear headphones, but when he was alone, he didn't bother.

So when Snake walked out of the bathroom, fresh from a shower and toweling off his hair, it immediately set off alarm bells to find such relative silence, doubly so as he walked into the living room to find Hal sitting cross-legged on the couch, hunched over his laptop like a shrimp in near-complete silence, save for the sounds of his own busy typing and clicking.

"Everything okay?" Snake asked, digging in his ear with his towel. Rounding on the couch, he caught sight of Hal's face and stopped, his guts clenching tight. The man looked like someone had just shot his dog.

"Not even slightly," Hal murmured. A few clicks, and he sat back to let Snake see the screen, upon which were a set of metal gear blueprints. "This was just posted. Publicly, on the War Thunder forums."

Snake came up alongside Hal, peering at the screen, eyes wide. "War Thunder forums?"

"War Thunder's an online military vehicle combat game. It's whole gimmick is that it tries to be as realistic as possible with its portrayal of the vehicles it features."

"And they've added a metal gear?"

"Yes, but this isn't their post. Their public forums have a reputation. People get really passionate about their favourite vehicles, their specs, the verisimilitude, and a bunch of times over the years, there have been players with access to classified design and specification documents who've posted those documents on the forums in order to win arguments about the vehicles they're discussing."

"You're serious?"

"Never underestimate a military nerd with an axe to grind. Some people get so deep into it that they forget that winning an argument on the internet isn't the be-all end-all," Hal said, shaking his head ruefully. "It's happened enough times to become an internet meme known outside of the player base of the game. People who have no interest in the military, vehicles, or the game know about the War Thunder forums and people leaking classified information on it."

"And someone leaked metal gear plans."

"Yeah. Recently, they added TX-55 to the game, and it's caused a bit of an uproar on the forums. Some people are mad earlier iterations of metal gears weren't added first, others are angry that something that powerful was added before the infantry models like Metal Gear G, but for the most part there's been a lot of back and forth about the actual specs of TX-55 itself, how it compares to other metal gears, and modern innovations. And then someone leaked these plans."

Snake squinted at the schematics onscreen, scanning the information as quickly as he could. There was no mistaking the shape of it. "That's REX."

"It is," Hal confirmed, the weight of it making him sink in his seat, slouching over again.

"Who posted it?"

"That's what I've been working on," Hal replied, taking his mouse back in hand. "The username is a jumble of letters and numbers. It looks like a bot username, honestly, but the poster uses enough slang and has enough grammar errors in their post history that I'm reasonably sure it's a human user. They're here to argue about tanks and planes and metal gears, no doubt about it. So I've been working on figuring out how to hack into the forums' database and get their IP info. Once I do, I can work on finding them."

"You can do that." It wasn't a question, it wasn't a statement. The words left Snake's mouth bereft of tonal indicator, himself unsure which direction they should go.

"Of course I can." Hal smirked, and began typing something out.

"Alright. While you get on that, I'll go get dressed. Once you've got a bead on them we can make our plan from there," Snake said matter-of-factly.

"You gotta get dressed?" Hal lamented, reaching out and giving Snake's ass an appreciative squeeze.

"If I don't, you'll get too distracted to work," Snake chuckled, grabbing Hal's hand and removing it from his butt.

Hal pouted. "Now I really hate this leaker," he grumbled, turning to watch all the same as Snake chuckled and sauntered out of the room, swaying his hips for Hal's benefit.

[eternalpho3nix]

THE WAR THUNDER FORUMS HAVE DONE IT AGAIN THAT'S 9 TIMES THEY'VE LEAKED CLASSIFIED MILITARY DOCUMENTS!!

[sweaterkittensahoy]

I feel like we should start a gofundme to buy the moderators a nice vacation somewhere. The frustration they must feel all the time.

[cozylittleartblog]

clown hours

new deltarune newsletter. i dont know how many characters are featured across the 50-ish valentines but i want it on record i only got queen and rouxls among mine. you will look at them

obviously toby fox knows my email personally somehow and knew exactly who to send me (joke. but also what are the odds)

[wouldyourfavepaychildsupport]

Would the War Thunder forums' inability not to leak classified documents pay child support?

[hiis-theme]

somewhere out there is an alternate timeline where toby was correct and people actually did hate spamton. could you imagine that. i have to imagine we wouldn't have gotten the spamton sweepstakes in that case which is crazy to think about given how much lore that gave us-

[jollysunflora]

#AGAIN?!?!?!?!

Surely, you think, this is an old post.

It's new as of December 2023! Congrats on your (checks notes) 14th breach, War Thunder!

Fucking incredible.

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

The 600 page user manual for the Chinese VT-4, a 3rd generation MBT produced for foreign export by the China North Industries Group Corporation has been leaked on the warthunder forum.

[mercelot]

War Thunder leaking classified docs is always fucking funny to me.

[rate-a-spam-bot]

[sweaterkittensahoy]

Quick! Tell them all planes are smooth as hell!!

my War Thunder forums joke went viral and I've got War Thunder fans explaining why the War Thunder forum joke isn't ACTUALLY accurate and not to put too fine a point on it but of course they did

[appendingfic]

You just know if we ever have a zombie apocalypse the Pentagon won't even bother releasing its zombie disaster training documents

[mydetheturk]

the war thunder forum leaks are a gift that keeps on giving ngl i have zero stakes in it it just brings me great joy and makes me laugh every time

[yamada-ryo]

war thunder forums

[itsaboringname]

#I mean I know Catra’s thinking about the silly imitation DT did

SHE~~~~~~RA~~~~~~

[ladyshinga]

The biggest reason I KNOW we haven't captured an alien spacecraft is that its specs haven't been leaked on War Thunder forums