#WINGMANNED THE HECK OUT OF ME

[thewertsearch]

Kanaya <3

This is the first troll we've seen who's not a newborn grub or thirteenish-year-old Player. I guess they pupate directly into a scaled-down version of their adult body.

She looks barely larger than a grub, so it can't have been long since the trials, assuming the Sburb trolls did them at all. The comic has never elaborated on what these trials entail, but I think this is the first aspect of Homestuck's universe that I don't want a loredrop on.

GA: I Dont Mean Hes The Universe You Are From GA: We Engineered That Incarnation GA: He Is The Universe That You Are Trying To Create

GA: That Statement Was As Literal As You Can Possibly Make Words Be GA: I Know Your Species Is Frequently Insincere For A Variety Of Reasons GG: but your species is too! […] GA: Thats True But When We Do It Its Usually Just Because We Are Trying To Be Jerks

And when you're trying not to be jerks, too. Alternia is just kind of.... like that.

GG: i try to say what i mean as much as i can GA: Yeah I Think Ive Been Discerning That GA: Its A Nice Change Of Pace […] GG: haha, you mean from rose?

Jade knows what the fuck is up. Maybe it's her turn to wingman for Rose.

GA: I Wont Be Speaking To Her Anymore Though GG: why? GG: oh yeah, because you said she is blacked out? GG: what the heck does that mean! GA: It Just Means In A Few Moments From Your Perspective I Wont Be Able To See Her Through My Viewport Or Talk To Her

The blackout occurred while these two girls were in conversation, meaning Rose is about to message Jade right as it kicks in.

This message is obviously important - but what could it be? Is Rose trying to warn Jade about the circumstances that cause the blackout, in order to protect her from its effects?

GA: She Has Been Relying On The Powers And Counsel Of Dark Gods And Other Sources Of Ambiguous Intent GA: And She Has Consequently Devised A Plan Which Sounds Very Dangerous To Me GG: yeah, i didnt like the sound of her plan either! GA: You Are More Sensible GA: Its Probably The Influence Skaia Has Had On You GA: Having Spent Much Of Your Life Awake On Prospit GA: Like Me

We've talked before about what Dream Moon affinity really means for a Player. The theory I liked the most was that Prospit kids are predisposed to follow their fate, whereas Derse kids are inclined to defy their destiny.

This seems like more fuel for that fire, as Rose's acts of desperation and defiance clash with Jade's more levelheaded, 'sensible' attitude. rose, you're going to break something! :o

[colourstreakgryffin]

Hintata shoto x tall!female!reader romantic headcanons

You got it! Shoyo is absolutely into tall queens, his gf can carry him around. He gets to be pampered and spoiled and be cute since he’s smaller. Yessss~!

Shoyo Hinata- North and South

Right up. Shoyo is the one who basically bulldozed towards you at full speed and asked you out. He may be a bit shy with beautiful girls like you but he is not afraid, he will coming in guns’a’blazing. He proudly yells out, after catching you in the hallway, a;

‘Go out with me, Dokusha!’

And yes. You said yes. Shoyo felt like he was flying when you smiled at him with your beautiful face and agreed to his request, even when he suspected not a single chance since you probably only knew him as the short middle blocker from the Volleyball club

But yet, you have him the chance he never thought he’d get. Shoyo is extensively training with his team after school in the Gymnasium and hitting Kageyama in the head with the volleyball. Proud, he’s unstoppable and his heart is flying as high as he can jump for basically the whole goddamn week

Shoyo absolutely asks all his friends for help with you… mainly Kageyama, whose gives the worst advice, and he does those bad ideas. He does every single thing his friends suggest to impress you and make you smile. You don’t even mind when he messes up and just keep trying him out. He is cute, he is caring, he is cheerful, he is inspiring and you do like short guys so you’re all for exploring Shoyo as a boyfriend

And you do! You also don’t regret it

I won’t say Shoyo has a baby-like attitude over your height but he is very clingy about it. He wants you to carry him around so he can; one see the world from the higher spots and two; just enjoy being able to touch and embrace you. Front or back, hook him on. He’ll be fine

Shoyo is so caring to you. He is the ultimate wingman and motivation-giver, he will always be there to support you, little or big situation, and he’ll give you his raw determination and ambition to help you persist through everything. He’s a excellent idol, even when learning and growing, and he strives to be perfect for you

Shoyo is quite loving and touchy. Like, he is always attached to your hip. He loves hugging you, the moment he sees you. He parts from whoever he’s with, to cling onto you like you can’t walk without him supporting you. He just wants any excuse to breath in your beautiful scent and look up at ‘your goddess of a face’

Shoyo is an emotional bond connector, not for the body or whatever pleasure you can give him physically. Shoyo doesn’t care if you’re fit as a brick wall or flabby like a sack of potatoes. He doesn’t care if you’re skinny or overweight. He loves you, he cares about who you are and he will never ever value your body or your looks over you. He does find you beautiful, no doubt, but it plays second fiddle to your true beauty!

Your personality

Shoyo is the most eccentric energetic boyfriend you will ever have in your life. He’s the golden retriever to your white siberian. He never stops running, he never stops in general. He can barely even sit down for five minutes without twitching, but if he is sat in your lap or cuddling your torso… he’s out as fast as you can snap your fingers

Shoyo is loyal as actual heck. You think he even looks at other girls now that he has you?! He doesn’t even look at… stimulating material as a growing hormonal boy, if it doesn’t include you. He’s that deadset on you. He won’t even look at Kiyoko since he refuses to find any other girl as beautiful as you

Shoyo chats. He’s open, he trusts you but he also has no idea when to stop so he tells you everything whilst you two are having lunch together. He’ll go in depth on how Tanaka and Nishinoya got flung like frisbees out of the window when charging for Kiyoko to explaining how Kageyama’s gym clothes smell like a combination of rotten eggs and soy sauce… he just

He’s very silly

Shoyo is a silly boyfriend. Silly, playful, he does his best to make you laugh and smile but don’t get me wrong. He absolutely can get serious… in his own Shoyo way, he just prefers to deflect the sadness and make you focus on the positives but if not, he’ll be here as an listening ear for you and your issues

Shoyo genuinely believes you and him will persist so trust me… he’s already looking for the perfect wedding ring for you. He’s just that certain you’re his soulmate. Let him have this

Shoyo feels comfortable with admitting his insecurities over his lack of height to you, but thanks to you and your support and your words, he grows to discard that issue altogether as he knows he can make up for his height on the court very well, whilst you can make up for his height in civil reasons. You’re his height

Now. To the part we all want; heights. Shoyo loves his tall queens, if a woman towers over him. He’s bleeding at the nose, it’s very intimidating but it’s making him feel amazing at the same time

Hell, Shoyo will even make himself smaller so you’ll take care of him— yes, he is the submissive bottom of you and his relationship. He likes it when you make him blush and whimper, he likes it when you sit him on the table to kiss him, he likes it when you retrieve things on the high shelf for him. He just… likes it

Shoyo just loves tall queens and he is glad you like short kings. Sure, he wouldn’t mind a short queen but tall queens call out to him more

“Baby! Baby! Wanna come join in on practicing with me? Sensei Tanaka and Sensei Nishinoya said they’ve been working on a routine for a game they said will win every time! Of course, I want you apart of it! You’re my girlfriend! Pleeeeaaassee~?”

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

a story of gradual despair and light at the end of the tunnel

Putting together a silly little narrative that “explains” the gacha results helps me cope with my bad luck, so let me have this OTL

At 50 rolls, my first SSR!! (The way my face dropped like a stack of bricks when I saw green light coming out from inside the stupid coffin...)

… WhAT IS gOING ON????!? I don’t even have Dorm Uniform Silver in JP, yet he decides to pull up NOW of all times???? Is it because I was joking several weeks ago about how suddenly I find you interesting thanks to a yandere look-alike...

“I’ll always fulfill my duty if someone sends for me.” aIn’T no oNE hERE sENDIN’ FOR YOu, SiLVER 😭 GO BACK TO THE GACHA POOL BEFORE I SHOVE YOU BACK THERE MYSELF

Then at 100 rolls… GUESS WHO STOLE MY PITY????

WHAT THE HECK, TWO GUYS FROM THE SAME DORM NEVER HAPPENS TO ME NOW I’M COnVINCED sEBEK CONSpiRED WiTH SILVER TO STRONgARM ME inTO THEIR cOMPANY YanSil real and Sebek is the pushy wingman who doesn’t know any better 💀 but more likely they’re Being Bodyguards and keeping Rollo away/j

The only person I forgive here is Kalim, who came at 150 rolls but at least he dragged Rollo with him… Like an extrovert bringing a grumpy biting, hissing, and clawing cat to a house party…

YOu BASTARD OTL HOW DARE HE TakE SO LONG… (For comparison, it only took me 40 rolls to get Rollo in JP!) IT'S OKAY, IT'S OKAY NOW IC AN SHOVE HIM WHEREEV ER I PLEASE IN BOTH EN AND JP AND HE CABN['T DO ABNYTUING ABOIUT IT... .. . .. . . ........ . . .. . . .. . . .... . WELCOME TO YOUR FOREVER HOME, FLAMME 😇

P.S. A friend pointed out to me that 3 out of 4 students involved are white/silver haired… which is ironic because normally I hate white/silver hair on characters…

[headfarintheclouds]

The Deal (Iso x Reader) Chapter 1

I tried dto post that 3 times from my PC but Tumblr crashed... so I'm posting it from my phone. I hope you guys like it !

Words count : 1400k

TW: none

"Fuck this I'm done!" yelling in anger I threw the gun to the ground, if Brimstone or Sova saw me right now I would probably get a scolding of a lifetime, but they weren't here with me. Only Gekko and his crew.

"Hey, calm down Y/n ! I'm sure you get it next try." the green haired Latino raised his hands, trying to stop me from exiting the practice range. I threw a nasty glare his way, making Trash growl at me in warning. "Hey, no that's not very nice!" he quickly scolded the creature making it roll its eyes at him.

I huffed and turned my head to the target I was practicing on. A ray of bullet holes behind it, only five or four on it. If being bad at shooting was a sport, then I was the champion of it.

"I'm sorry Mateo but I've been practicing for months now. I can't seem to land a single shot. If it's gonna be like that then I might as well quit while I'm ahead." I told him with a sad smile. His brow eyes widened in surprise upon hearing me say that, before I knew it, he was standing before me with a deep frown on his youthful face.

"Hey no, don't think like that. Not everyone is good at everything, chicka. Sometime those things take time." sending me a small smile he put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed it in silent support.

"It's been six months through, what if I'm not made for this?" I looked up at my best friend, desperation clear in my voice.

"Nobody was made for this, but everyone made it work in the end. You'll get there soon enough." he nodded his head, firmly believing in his own words.

I sighed. Yeah, I was invited to Valorant by Brimstone himself, but back then none of us knew I would be an absolute shit at shooting. All he saw was a silent Radiant, with control over sounds who was amazingly good at sneaking and getting information. It was what he needed, he told me back then. But then assured me he wouldn't send me anywhere until I finished my training. Ever since then I have been on the base spending my time in the shooting range alongside Gekko and Neon, who quickly became my best friend among the Agents. Guess I got one good thing out of that whole shit show.

"I'll talk to Brimstone." I said, already making up my mind. Wingman who was standing in-between us, put his tiny limp on my leg and let out a series of sad chirps making my heart clench in pain. Gosh I was going to miss this adorable guy. Neon and Gekko too, heck even Yoru who was a pain in the ass from day one.

"Y/n please, think about this." Gekko begged, his eyes glossy from the unshed tears. I chuckled halfheartedly at my friend and put a hand over the one he still had on my shoulder.

"I have."

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ:

After my talk with Brimstone I made my way to my room and started to pack up my things. The older man wasn't pleased with my decision and tried to persevere me to stay, heck he even involved Sage in it knowing how much respect I held for the women. But I wasn't about to drag everyone down with my poor skills. They had Omen, Sova and Cypher to gather all the information they needed.

A knock on my door stopped me in my tracks. Narrowing my brows I sighed and decided to ignore it in favor of putting my things in my duffle bag. Another knock, this time a louder and more aggressive one.

"I don't want to talk, leave me alone Gekko!" I yelled hoping it would be enough. After all who else would it be? Neon didn't know about me leaving yet, and both Sage and Brimstone respected my choices enough to leave me alone for now.

"It's not Gekko." my eyes widened in surprise upon hearing the deep voice of Iso.

The Chinese hit man quickly became my favorite person around HQ, even if we didn't spend nearly enough time together, I still found myself harboring a crush on him. What was he doing outside my door?

I walked over to it and punched in the code to open them, coming face to chest with the handsome man. My eyes widened upon seeing the intensity in his lilac-colored orbs. They seemed to be glowing.

"I heard you were leaving." he stated, no greetings or how are you's. Just straight to the point.

"I.. I am yes." stuttering I gasped when he pushed me in the room and closed the door behind him.

"Why?"

"What do you mean 'why'?" I blinked in confusion.

"Why are you leaving? Give me a one good reason." he wasn't making any sense to me. Why was he suddenly so interested in me leaving the place? We spoke maybe a total of five times during my stay here. But I had to admit, it did make my heart do summer sluts inside my ribcage. Did he care?

"I suck at shooting, that's why." I stated simply, observing his face for any kind of reaction. All I got was him clenching his jaw and mumbling something in Chinese.

"Is that all?" he asked, making me narrow my own eyes at him.

"Excuse me?"

"That is not a valid reason to leave." he said in anger, taking a step closer. I never realized how big he was until now, holy shit! And he was mad at me to! (For some reason) Was this the way I was going to die?

"What's it to you?' I challenged him with a hiss.

"You. Me. Shooting Range tomorrow at noon. I will train you personally from now on." I could myself going pale. He wanted to train me? Personally? Yes please, but also no fucking way. I wasn't about to make a fool out of myself in front of my crush.

"No way. I'm leaving first thing in the morning." shaking my head I missed the moment he got closer, until I could feel the warmth of his breath on my face. It smelled faintly of cinnamon.

"I am not asking you, I'm telling you Tián tián." he leaned his head even closer, so close in fact I could make specks of dark purple in his eyes. "Listen to me. Let's make a deal. If you stay, I will make it so you'll be one of the best shooters in the entire team. Give me three months." I blinked at the sudden change of attitude. He was very confident in what he was saying that much I could tell.

"And if I don't become the best shooter?" I whispered, too scared to speak any louder than that. He was still very close to me, so when he smirked upon hearing my Question I about fainted then and there.

"Then I will let you go."

"You will let me go? Aren't you getting ahead of yourself, big guy?"

"Let me put it this way. If at any point of the three months you'll run away, I will personally hunt you down and drag you back. Do you understand?"

Okay, what the fuck was going on right now? Where was the sweet and shy guy who stuck to the side lines and didn't interact with others? Was he swapped during one of the missions? Did he hit his head or something? I blinked up at the older male, trying to understand what was being said to me.

"Okay. But what if you win the bet? What do you want in return?" I asked, my voice curious to hear his reason.

"You'll see." he stood up straight, putting more distance between us and making my heart calm down a bit. "I'll see you tomorrow." he winked and left both my room and me in a state of ruin.

[viiiiiiiiiin]

JAJSJSJDJSD HELL YEAH

Sanji with bff reader who's trying to be his wingman and failing pls (either because sanji is really bad at picking up ladies or the reader is horrendous at wingmanning, heck maybe even both, you decide)

Next Time: Sanji and Wingman Reader

Includes: Sanji , Male Reader , Strawhats

A / N: STOP I LOVE THIS. LOSERS BEING BESTIES FR !!! I hope u don't mind that I chose male reader. I don't write much of them and I want a variety :) enjoy ! Sorry it's short @@

"Cmon Sanji ! You got this ! Do what we rehearsed !" You gave him a thumbs up and a toothy grin. The blonde haired gentleman nodded in return as you took your place behind the door.

Another failed attempt , you assumed by the way his head was hung downwards. You walked over to him and patted his back gently. "It's okay , Ji. You'll get 'er next time !" You laughed and threw your arm around his muscular shoulder.

"Maybe I should try a different pickup line. What do ya got , Reader ?" He asked , grabbing a notepad from seemingly nowhere.

"Ooh ! Ooh ! How about this ! Pretend to spill a drink and be like 'I tripped over my feelings for you . . .' That's gotta win Nami over for sure !" You spun around and grabbed out a poster board.

"What about something about tangerines ? 'You heart is as sweet and sour as a Tangerine' as you kiss her hand. That's gotta make her swoon !" The fact that both of you were so bad at picking up women honestly made the crew feel a bit bad. Why Sanji listened to your advice , the world will never know.

"How about for Robin - Chwan !" He said , spinning as he spoke of the dark haired diva. You placed a finger to your chin , deep in thought. Maybe a dark pun ? Maybe a history pun ? Before you could think , you spoke.

"Ooh ! How about 'you stole my heart like Doflamingo stole Dressrosa . . .' Thats gotta woo her !" You jumped up and down and smiled widely. "What if I gave her something as I said that ?? Or you could help me trip for the pick up line with Nami - Swan !" Sanji rambled as he swirled around , a love tornado of lust was what he was.

"Ooh ! Great idea !! You're so smart !!" Sanji closed his notepad and you both walked over to the ginger. She raised an eyebrow and you pushed Sanji , fake acting like you did it by accident. "Oh no ! I'm sooo sorry Sanji !" You snickered , watching as he fell to his strong knees.

"I tripped over my love for you , mademoiselle . . ~" He spoke smoothly , a perverted grin on his pale face. Nami picked up the book she was reading and smacked both of you in the head.

"That one sucked ! At least be mote creative !" With that , she stomped away and left the both of you with massive bumps on your heads. You both groaned and sat up.

"Fuck , another failure. I'm sorry , Ji. I'll figure somethin' out." You scratched your aching head snd looked sadly at the devastated cook. "Maybe you just haven't met the right girl ! Try flirting when we get to the next island !"

Your suggestion didn't go unheard. As you approached an island to restock supplies , you snd Sanji ran out to the nearest bar. "Try buying her a drink and saying she's as sweet as it ! Or I could spill it on you and you could say your love for her spilled over you !" You suggested as the both of you dashed to the nearest bar.

"Yeahh !! I got this !!"

He does not got it. You spilled the drink and it got ALL over his slacks and the ground. You both ended up being kicked out for causing a disturbance and made all the women laugh at yalls failed attempt at seducing a possible suitor.

You both walked out , dejected at the last failed attempt. You sighed dramatically and fell to the ground. "I'm sorry , Ji ! Next time !"

Next time. How many more 'next time's can he take ? You both were seemingly made to be best friends. One horrendous at flirting and the other horrendous at wingmanning. Next time , next time , next time. Would there be a next time ?

[the-authoress-writes]

Love Is a Many-Splendored Thing

A MavDad/PennyMav Fic

Synopsis: What do paperwork and a manicure have to do with Pete Mitchell getting the happy ending he never thought he would?

Everything, apparently.

Warnings: Fluff—pure, unadulterated fluff with feels.

Author’s Note: At last, I fulfill my promise to write something for Mav!

I couldn’t be happier to finally write something where Mav is the star, and not the wingman, literal or figurative.

Honestly, this story idea has been floating around in my head for a while, and here it is!

I know I should be working on the next chapter of Wherever You Go, or heck, even my faceclaim post for said fic, but this just wanted to be written already, and hopefully, now that I’ve gotten it out of my system, I will be able to get back to writing that.

I swear I didn’t plan to post this around Valentine’s Day, but hey, I’m not complaining!

Anyway, I hope you enjoy my schmoopy MavDad indulgence!

“Honey, have you done your homework?” Mav heard Penny ask Amelia, from where he was drying the dinner dishes in the kitchen.

“Did it this afternoon, Mom, and I told you, the light is better here.”

“Okay, alright, let me just open a window before you suffocate us with the acetone,” Penny chuckled.

“Thanks, Mom.”

The sound of latches opening and glass bottles clinking together tinkled through the air, and the shadow of Penny crossing to open the window behind the breakfast nook fell across the counter next to him.

The cool breeze of a San Diego fall evening washed in, much like the distant tide.

A few soft footfalls later, warm arms wrapped around him. “Pete, honey, you coming up soon?”

Cracking a smile at the muted gag from the dining table, he sighed, leaning back against her. “I’ll try—I have a shit-ton of paperwork that Cyclone dumped on me.

The disadvantages of being an instructor and squadron leader,” he ruefully smiled, though he didn’t really regret taking the TOPGUN job and the position of CO of the newly created VFA-223, the “Black Cloaks”, comprised entirely of the Daggers and those who had been selected for the detachment training—or Maverick’s Ducklings, as Cyclone had dubbed them.

She nodded against his back. “Alright, come to bed when you’re done, okay?”

“I’ll be there.”

It was one of the best decisions in his life to work at his relationship with Penny—they had no chance of working when he was younger; his soul was too haunted, his heart, mind, and body chasing ghosts while also fleeing from them, but now… well, now, his mother’s engagement ring was sitting in the drawer of his desk at work, just waiting.

For what, exactly, he wasn’t sure.

The right moment, he guessed.

Mav heard Penny’s footsteps start up the stairs just as he placed the last glass in the cabinet, and after a wistful exhale, he grabbed the reluctantly-owned attaché case that Ice would have cackled over him having, which contained the classwork from his TOPGUN students, and the relatively sensitive training run reports of the Black Cloaks, setting it down at the dining table, across from where Amelia was… doing something to her nails.

He began working on the papers, and soon realized she was doing her nails.

After a while, Amelia murmured, “How’s the paperwork going?” a smirk like her mother’s on her face.

Belatedly, he realized he’d been watching her work instead of reading his reports. “It’s uh… paperworking,” he muttered lamely.

“I bet it’s better than watching nail polish dry.”

He blinked—she had her mother’s and her grandfather’s dry wit, that was for sure.

After that pointed reminder, the two of them worked in silence, the sound of a bottle of clear polish eventually punctuating the air with a sound of finality.

She blew on her hands for a while, then set them down on the table.

He soon felt the weight of her stare, and let it rest on him for about five minutes before he interjected, “How’s the uh, manicure?”

“Good.

The paperwork?”

“… It’s…”

“Boring,” she dared, raising an eyebrow.

He debated the consequences of telling Amelia responsibility was boring, but the truth was, no matter how interesting the maneuvers were in the air, the constraints of report language made them boring.

“Yeah,” he admitted.

“Figured.” She blinked, thoughtful. “Do you have to do anything special with the paperwork?”

“Not really, just read them over, and make sure that what they’re saying in the report matches up with what happened in the air.

And then I have to grade my students’ homework.”

Amelia nodded, and after a pause, she asked, “You any good at multitasking?”

Even though he wasn’t sure where she was going with this, he replied, “Pretty good.”

It was part of his job after all, especially since he switched to single-seat; having to calculate things like AOA and airspeed relative to the limitations of his aircraft, all while flying faster than the speed of sound, among other things.

“Okay.

You read those reports and grade that homework.

I’m going to tell you about my day while I give you a manicure.” She inhaled, something hesitant in her eyes. “Unless… unless you don’t want me to bug you—it’s teenager stuff and all that—”

He cut her off, “I’d love to hear about your day, Amelia.”

It hit something in his heart to see the quickly concealed shock in her eyes.

Yet another strike for Penny’s dick ex-husband in Mav’s book.

“You would?”

“Yeah, of course, kiddo.

But uh,” Mav scratched the back of his neck, “is the manicure really necessary?”

Like a flash of lightning, she leaned over the table and grabbed his hand, scrutinizing each finger and his palm, wrinkling her nose in disgust. “Ugh—yeah.”

He hedged, “I’m pretty sure it’s against regs for me to have pink—”

“Relax, old man, there is such a thing as clear polish—Admiral Stick-in-the-Mud won’t see a thing.

And I need something to do too, I’m not even halfway tired yet.

Fixing your trainwreck hands oughta do the trick,” she gestured.

He laughed, switching the papers to his right hand. “Alright, Skylark, go to town.”

Amelia ducked her head and grabbed her nail file, failing to conceal her smile at the nickname he’d given her shortly after he and Penny got back together. “Okay, so, um, at school, math is my first subject, and honestly, whoever said math should be the first class of the day needs to be punished…”

Almost two and a half hours later, the paperwork was done, Mav’s nails were cut, filed, and polished, his cuticles trimmed, hands moisturized, and he knew every dirty, juicy secret of North Island High.

Amelia drowsily packed up her nail kit, which was the size of a small toolbox, while he did the same with his attaché case, and as a team, they checked the doors and windows of the house, making sure everything was secure.

The task done, they ended up back at the dining room. “All hatches battened down, Captain,” she sighed.

At his slightly perplexed frown, she rolled her eyes, “Seriously—you’re in the navy.”

“Like I told your mom, I don’t sail boats, I just land on them,” he chuckled.

“Well, it means everything’s good.”

He softly clapped his hands together, “Alrighty, let’s get to bed then.”

Amelia snorted, “God, you’re so old, who even says alrighty non-ironically anymore?”

“Alrighty isn’t cool anymore?”

“No.

Was it ever?”

“Uh…”

She shook her head, “Remind me to get you up to date, I can’t have you embarrassing yourself out there—you’ll lose all your cool.”

Mav immediately pointed, “So you think I’m cool?”

Caught like a deer in the headlights, she tried to backtrack. “I mean, don’t—don’t all you naval aviators think you’re like, the coolest or something?”

“No, no, no, no take-backsies; you think I’m cool,” he grinned.

She winced, “You’re killing me here—‘take-backsies’?”

“Come onnnn, Skylark.”

“Ugh, fine,” she groaned, “you’re—you’re sort of cool.”

“I’ll take it, kid.”

She smirked, then looked at her nail kit despairingly. “Seriously regretting bringing the whole thing down.

It’s heavy as hell.”

He reached for it, “Lemme get it for ya.”

Amelia attempted to bat his hands away, “No, I can carry it, Mav.”

“I got it—just focus on getting yourself up the stairs.”

She visibly debated the idea of arguing, but a yawn cut her off, and with the element of her eyes closed, he used the opportunity to gently wrap an arm around her shoulder and usher her up the stairs.

“You should have let me carry it—you’re too old to carry heavy stuff,” she muttered, mindful of her likely sleeping mother.

“I can carry this for you, don’t worry about me.

And next time you do my nails, you can carry it.”

They had arrived at her bedroom door, and she stopped short. “Next time?”

“Yeah, who else will help me get through my paperwork, take care of my hands, and let me know if Micah takes Kenna instead of Alyssa to Junior Prom?”

A smile curled the corner of her mouth. “I guess someone has to help you stay in the brass’ good graces so they don’t ship you out to the asscrack of America for not doing paperwork.”

“Can’t afford to leave you and your mom, Skylark.” And he really didn’t want to leave this time, not when he finally had so much to stay for.

“Or the chicken.

And the ducklings.”

“Yeah, them too,” Mav laughed quietly, similarly mindful of Penny, before handing the nail kit to her. “Anyway, here you go, Amelia.”

She took the nail kit, looking at him for a beat, like she had something to say, but wasn’t sure about whether to say it.

Finally, she said, “Thanks.

And, uh… I… I—I know I like giving you crap, but, I—I like—having you around, Mav.

And I—I…” she trailed off, pinching the bridge of her nose, “you know what, never mind, I’m rambling, your disaster hands made me tired.”

He knew that she wanted to say something else just then, but he let it go, not wanting to pry. “I really, really like being around too, Skylark, and if I have anything to say about it, I won’t be going anywhere.”

“That’s good,” she smiled, swallowing thickly. “I, uh, I better go—gotta get that good sleep.”

“Alright, kiddo, goodnight.”

“Night, Mav.”

After a sleepy smile, she softly shut her door, and he continued up the stairs, getting into bed beside a sleeping Penny, wrapping himself around her, quickly drifting off to sleep.

“Alright, Daggers, good work on the hop, head to the hangar, and we’ll review the maneuvers,” Mav clapped his hands, looking at his squad, most of whom dispersed to the aforementioned location, save for Bradley, who hung back.

“I seriously don’t know how you do it, you crazy old man,” Bradley laughed, his Caravans doing nothing to hide the child-like glee in his eyes. “I thought we’d all learned everything our first TOPGUN sessions and during the detachment training, but somehow, you manage to teach us something new every time.”

“Well, I got to make sure you kids know everything I do, so you all can continue to terrorize the Navy when I retire,” Mav grinned.

Bradley scoffed, “You say that like you’re going to turn in your papers today—we both know the brass’ll have to drag you from your F-18, Mav.” His son in everything but name and blood paused, a twitch of his mustache the only giveaway of his rising concern. “I mean—you’re not doing that any time soon—right, Dad?”

He wrapped an arm around Bradley, “Nah, not about to leave you to the skies just yet, Baby Goose.

Not until I make you all better than me.”

His “Until I make sure you can survive anything,” went unsaid, but his boy, ever perceptive, leaned into the contact and murmured, “Love you too, Dad.”

“Love you more—” Mav cut himself off as he went to run a hand through his hair, frowning at his hand.

There on his thumb, in bright, varnished red, was a neatly drawn heart, and the letter U.

Distantly, he heard Bradley say, “Mav?

Dad, you okay?

What’s wrong?”

“This wasn’t here last night,” he muttered, showing Bradley his thumb.

The worry eased from his son’s face, replaced with amusement. “You let Skylark do your nails?”

“Yes, I did—sue me—but Roo, this wasn’t there last night, I distinctly remember making Amelia use clear nail polish.”

Bradley took his hand, scrutinizing it. “It looks like there’s top coat on here, so she put this last night.”

Mav couldn’t help the surprise on his face.

“Sue me, sometimes Phoe makes me paint her toenails,” the younger pilot muttered.

“How is that possible—I saw my hands after she did it; this wasn’t there.”

Bradley thought for a second, before the metaphorical lightbulb lit up. “Invisible nail polish.”

“What?

That’s a thing?”

“Yeah—absolutely.

It goes on clear, but stand in the sun or heat up your hands, it’ll turn the color it’s supposed to be.”

As Mav absorbed this information, the puzzle pieces came together in his head, what Amelia had been trying to say before they said goodnight, and tears sprang to his eyes.

“Dad?”

“Amelia loves me, Baby Goose—I can’t bel—I don’t—”

Immediately, Bradley took him into his arms. “Hey; Dad, listen to me: you deserve all the love in the world, okay?

And I am so sorry for my hand in making you feel like you don’t deserve love, but you do, Dad—I can assure you, you do.

I’m really happy for you.

Maybe now, you can muster up the guts to bust out that box that’s been hiding in your desk.”

Mav gasped, “How did you—”

“I saw it when I asked for some Post-It’s last week.

Seriously, you didn’t even make an effort to hide it.”

“You—you’re not mad I didn’t tell you?” he gulped.

Bradley smirked, pulling back, “Dad, I knew this was coming a long time ago, and really, as long as you’re happy and healthy?

I’m on your wing.”

Mav reached up, cupping Bradley’s face. “You’re a good kid, Baby Goose.”

Regret twisted his boy’s face. “Could have been better.”

“I love you regardless, kid.

Now come on, they’re probably all wondering where we are, let’s debrief so we can get outta here sooner; I need your help at the mall.”

“Su—wait, what?” It was amusing to see Bradley stop right in his tracks.

“I need to get something for Amelia; but I don’t know where to start.”

“I…” the younger pilot opened and closed his mouth repeatedly, before finally shutting it with a click and sighing, “I guess we’re going shopping later for Skylark, then.”

Mav eagerly slapped him on the arm, wide grin on his face as he dashed back to the hangar, and Bradley tried to not to feel that this mall mission was like stealing an F-14 all over again.

“Pen, Skylark, I’m home!” Mav ventured, hoping for the first time, that Penny wasn’t home.

“Just me, Mav, Mom’s still at The Hard Deck!” Amelia called back, and relief flowed through him; it made this a whole lot easier.

He followed the sound of her voice to the dining room, where she was bent over a textbook, and he pulled up the chair next to her. “Hey kiddo, you got a minute?”

Amelia froze and swallowed thickly, shutting her textbook slowly, an unreadable expression on her face. “Mav, I swear, if you have gotten yourself shipped off again, I am not going to be the one to tell Mom—”

“No!” he yelped, “it’s not like that.

I just wanted to talk to you for a bit.”

“Okay,” she breathed, still skeptical.

He reached out and took her hands in his right. “I got your message.”

She frowned, “I didn’t call you this—” she cut herself off at his meaningful look at his hand. “Oh—that.” She frantically shook her head. “I—I was just playing with you, it doesn’t—“

“I don’t think you were,” he gently pressed.

“I—I—Mav,” she breathed, eyes wide, like a deer in the headlights.

He pulled her into his arms. “I love you too, Amelia.”

And God, it broke his heart to hear her gasp, “You do?”

“Swear on my wings, Skylark,” Mav solemnly nodded into her hair.

He held her tighter against him as she sniffled, her small frame trembling.

When her trembling and sniffles subsided, he drew back. “Now, I have a pretty big question to ask you, Amelia.

It’s one I’ve actually wanted to ask for a while, but something held me back; I think I’m ready to ask now.

You up for it?”

She swiped the back of her hand across her face. “Shoot.”

He pulled a small, black velvet box from his jacket pocket, and opened it, laying it on the table. “You think your mom would like that?”

Her jaw dropped. “You…”

“Mm-hmm.

I’m asking your permission to marry your mother.”

She dared, “Hypothetically, what if I say no?”

Mav inhaled, wincing, “I would ask you to reconsider, but I’d respect that.”

A deep frown creased her brow. “You would deny yourself happiness just because I didn’t want you to marry Mom?”

He took her hand again. “Amelia, you and your mom are a package deal; the last thing on earth I want is to come between you and your mother.

And if that means that this never gets used… well, so be it.”

Tears welled in her eyes, and her voice shook, “You love Mom, right?”

He couldn’t help a soft smile. “I’ve… I’ve loved your mom for a long time, kiddo.

Yeah, I love her.”

“And you’re not going anywhere anytime soon, right?”

“If I have my way, I’m not going anywhere.”

Wordlessly, she nodded.

“Yeah?”

Nodding again, she stated, “Yeah, you can marry my mom.”

“Thanks, Skylark,” he beamed, wrapping an arm around her. “You don’t know what that means.

And hey, I have something for you.”

Mav pulled out the small, white bag he’d tucked in his bomber. “I had an idea of what I wanted, and Bradley told me this store was a good place to find what I was looking for—apparently, he’s bought here before.”

Amelia carefully took the box out of the bag, revealing a silver Pandora bracelet with a double charm of a silver swooping bird encrusted with small blue stones, a small round medal behind it saying “Time to fly” with stylized birds on it, and a simple, custom silver medal engraved with his handwriting, saying, “I love you too.”

Mav couldn’t help rambling, “It’s a Pandora bracelet, you can add charms to it if you want, I just wanted to give you something special; I was always going to give you this even if you didn’t give me your permission to marry your mother—”

“Mav.

This… this is too much,” Amelia breathed, interrupting him.

He twisted his mouth self-effacingly. “Nothing’s too much for those I love.”

Tears welled in her eyes again, and this time, she lurched forward into his arms.

He held her for a long moment, before pulling back to look at her. “Now, I need your help.

You and I need to get your mom here early, and you need to help Brads when he comes over in a bit; he’s bringing the food.”

Amelia’s eyes lit up. “You’re going to ask her tonight, aren’t you?”

“That’s the plan.”

“Didn’t know you were capable of making a plan, Mav,” she smirked.

“I am amazing at making plans, Skylark—come on, let’s get to work.”

Under the pretense of Amelia being very under the weather, both she and Mav had managed to get Penny home before the sun had even gone down—Penny burst through the door, gasping for breath. “Pete—Ames?”

“Here, Mom,” she called out from her seat in the dining room, exchanging happy glances with Mav and Bradley.

“What’s wrong, how are you feel—” Penny stopped short when she caught sight of the trio of Mav, Bradley, and Amelia at the dining table with shit-eating grins on their faces, connecting the dots that she did have. “You weren’t feeling sick, were you?” she addressed her daughter.

“It was my idea, Pen, we didn’t know how else to get you home faster,” Mav sheepishly spoke up, throwing himself on the figurative sword.

“Pete!”

“What?

I wanted us to… celebrate—family, you know?

Have a family dinner with your kid, my kid.”

Amelia piped up, “And my allergies were acting up really bad today, Mom.”

“You’re a bad influence, Pete.”

He stood, approaching her, his million-watt smile on full brilliance. “Aww, you love me.”

She stared stonily, before her eyes softened and the corner of her lips tipped up under the assault of his gaze and smile. “Unfortunately.”

Amelia and Bradley playfully gagged simultaneously, causing both Penny and Mav to laugh, to which Bradley spoke up, “Well, I still have to heat up the food I brought, because we didn’t know when you’d get here, Penny, so why don’t you two go for a walk on the beach, do whatever two old people in love do?”

Mav teasingly pointed, “Remember who kicked your ass in hops this morning, Baby Goose,” while Penny crossed her arms, seamlessly picking up the thread, “And who can raise the price of your drinks, Rooster.”

Bradley raised his hands in surrender. “That is freaky as hell.

Let’s leave them to it, Skylark, I need a wingman in the kitchen.”

Without even a peep of protest, Amelia followed Bradley, but not before giving Mav a supportive wink.

“What was that about?” Penny narrowed her eyes at her boyfriend.

“What?”

“That wink Amelia sent you.”

“Did she?

I didn’t see anything.”

She tilted her head skeptically, but he continued, “Why don’t we take Baby Goose’s suggestion and go take a walk on the beach?

It’ll be nice, sweetheart.”

Despite the feeling that Mav was up to something, she nodded and laced her arm through his offered elbow for the suggested beach walk, not knowing the other hand tucked in his bomber pocket was wrapped around a little black velvet box.

It was a nice evening, warm, but with a breeze coming in off the ocean, and the sunset was gorgeous.

Penny walked along the shore, arm in arm with Mav, just enjoying each other’s company in a way they wouldn’t be capable of over thirty years ago.

They had both grown so much as people, in so many ways, big and small, and she tilted her head, briefly leaning it against his shoulder.

“Penny for your thoughts?” he murmured, a smile in his voice.

She chuckled, “You’re corny.

But I was thinking about us.”

“Hmm—good thoughts?”

“Yeah.

I don’t think we could have had this years ago.

I’m so glad that we have it now, before it was too late.”

He sighed heavily. “That’s on me, Pen.

I am more sorry than you know—so much wasted time.”

“Don’t beat yourself up, Pete; the time was right.

And we still have time, it’s not like either of us have a foot in the grave.”

“It’s less time than I’d like.”

She smiled softly, “You romantic.”

“I try,” he joked, soon growing serious. “But… as much as I wish it weren’t the case, I guess the time was right for us.

Even just five years ago… I’d have crashed and burned us, and there’d be no hope after that.

But now… look at us.”

“I know.”

“Penny… there’s so much I want to tell you, but I don’t know if I have the words to describe them,” he breathed, tone intense.

She ran her hand soothingly up and down his arm, knowing he was just collecting himself.

“I—with you, solid ground feels just as much like home as the sky always has.

Your love makes me feel free, when I’ve never wanted so much to stay in one place before.

You know all my issues, my shortcomings, my fears, and yet, you’re still here.

I don’t deserve a woman like you, but somehow, you chose me.”

“Pete—”

He stopped them, took both her hands in his, and slowly knelt in the sand, before he plucked a black velvet box from his jacket pocket. “All this is to say, Penelope Marissa Benjamin, will you make me the happiest man on earth and make me your husband?”

She gasped, her eyes darting from Mav’s earnest face to the beautiful solitaire diamond set in a simple band of yellow gold. “Isn’t it supposed to be ‘be my wife?’”

“I’m marrying up, here,” he grinned, continuing, “so what do you say?

Because Captain Benjamin-Mitchell definitely has a ring to it.

Though your dad would probably have a heart attack at the thought of me having his last name too.”

“I think he’s come around to you, actually—he calls you ‘that damn Maverick’ instead of ‘that fucking Mitchell’, nowadays.”

Mav tilted his head from side to side, considering. “I’ll take it.

So… marry me?”

“Yes.

Yes, I will,” she breathlessly replied.

“Oh, thank God,” he muttered, delight shining in his eyes, his hands shaking as he placed the ring on her finger.

It fit perfectly, and Mav wistfully sighed. “My mom would be so happy to see this now.

This was hers, you know.”

Her eyes widened, and she looked at the ring again, the vintage cut of the diamond now obvious to her. “Oh, Pete.”

His eyes grew glassy, and Penny immediately wrapped him in an embrace.

“I love you, Pen.”

She could hear the emotion in his voice, and she held on tighter, matching his own grip on her. “I love you too.”

When she felt his hold on her loosen, she pulled back, cupping his face in her hands. “You okay?”

Mav leaned into her touch. “I am now.”

“Good.”

“The kids should have dinner ready by now.” He sniffled, clearly thinking of something. Finally, he asked, “Uh, would you mind… helping me up?

My uh, knee is a little stiff.”

Penny chuckled, shifting her hands to help her now-fiancé up, a surprised little yelp escaping her when Mav spun the two of them in a circle, his joyful laugh singing through the air.

Mav took in the scene at the dining table before him like it was a fine wine; Amelia and Bradley were animatedly sharing stories from high school, trying to see who had the weirdest stories, both of them sending him “Can you believe this?” glances when they thought the other wasn’t looking; Amelia’s bracelet catching the light as she swept her hand in an expansive gesture; Penny at his side laughing at the stories Amelia and Bradley were telling, while she repetitively ran her thumb across his knuckles, his mother’s ring sparkling on her hand.

He never in a million years could have imagined he’d have this at this point in his life; in all honesty, he had been prepared to burn in over some foreign sea or land, decades ago.

But here he was.

And if not for his wingman ordering him to teach an impossible mission, this reality would doubtlessly be impossible.

Gratitude filled his heart, and he sent a thought to the heavens; “Thank you, Ice—for everything.”

High above the San Diego night sky, a singular star blinked, sending back, even though its intended recipient would never know; “You’re welcome, Mav.”

Title is from the song of the same name.

(I really like to name stories after songs, don’t I?)

I headcanon Mav as being neurodivergent, and for me, as someone with ADHD, more often than not, having something else to focus on in the background, helps me get something that I am directly focused on done.

Invisible nail polish does exist, though let’s suspend our disbelief about how dark it can turn if the pre-change color is clear…

The charms I describe are real—you can see the bird charm here, and Pandora does offer an engraving service to make charms with your handwriting on them!

I’ll leave it up to your imagination as to who Bradley purchased Pandora for…

(That’s not teasing, I’m genuinely leaving it up to you)

Taglist

@valmare

@callsign-skydancer

@permanentlyexhaustedpigeon88

@tadomikiku

@malindacath

@aviatorobsessed

@lynnevanss

@djs8891

If you’d like to join my taglist, just send me an ask!

[wallet6464]

DRAGON X MACHO (OR SPIN KICKS AS I HAVE DECIDED TO CALL THE SHIP) 🐉 💳

This will just be me rambling about them and head cannons and stuff!

First off, why do I ship 'em?

-I genuinely think it would be a fun paring with the contrast between the two

-they have been in TWO games together (macho being champ In both)

-I just think macho would like his fun boyfriend and would think he is super sweet and adorable

-dragon needs more love

How I think they would start dating:

-I think dragon had the most obvious crush on macho thinking he was super cool

-Heike wingmanned the whole time since he could talk to macho (being in the world circuit after all)

-they acc enjoyed each other a lot and decided to acc start dating

ANYWAYS REAL HEADCANON TIME:

(With examples)

-Dragon has autism and macho doesn’t understand any of it but he still is supportive (example:)

Smm “why do you only buy dragon stuff here babe?”

Dragon “Oh dragons are my hyperfixation”

Smm “what the heck is that? Oh well doesn't matter. Here is $5000, buy every dragon here! love you babe”

Dragon “I love you too 宝贝“

(Drawing this in comic form eventually lol)

-CONSTANT BEACH DATES

dragon doesn’t mind tho he just likes to hang out with macho and macho loves to show him off and teach him how to surf (plus dragon gets to show off his cool dragon leg tattoos which is another headcannon i need to draw)

-they watch reality tv together and dragon loves to hear macho talk about the show and relationships in depth

Smm: “ that big Ed dude where do I start on HIM!”

Dragon: “um tell me his most infamous moment 宝贝”

Smm: *queue 90 day fiancé rant*

-dragon is spoiled rotten by macho, like down right decomposed rotten. dragon even mentions smth he wants and it’s his the next day

Dragon: “OMG THAT IS SO COOL” (probably a dragon figure)

Smm: “OMG YEAH BAE That’s so radical”

(already buying it on Amazon prime WITH next day delivery)

-like only Heike and soda know even though it’s really obv if people thought about it (and tbh if you asked macho he would so flex his “radical partner” or if you asked dragon he would gush about how amazing macho is as a boyfriend )

-GYM PARTNERS!!! Dragon helps macho on leg day and vice versa. Each of them are each other's spotter and motivate each other during sets.

Smm: “ PUMP IT BABE!! YOU GOT IT!!”

Dragon: “Focus 宝贝! I know you can do it!”

-dragon will climb on machos back randomly (he needs to be swears)

-Macho does Q and A live streams with dragon JUST off screen and ignores questions about him (he does a lil trolling)

Smm: “Welcome to another TUBULAR stream from SUPER MACHO MAN RAHH!”

“Give yours truly some questions dudes and dudettes”

(And Dragon just be Reading diary of a wimpy kid in the background) (is that a self projection onto dragon? Yes, it was but I’m not wrong)

-They Have a shared Spotify account and a shared playlist and they both connect their headphones and do smth together!

-on there shares Spotify their playlists would be named by macho and have really fun names (eg:)

EPIC RADICAL TUBULAR BEACH VIBES (macho’s personal playlist)

THE BAES TOTALLY SICK PLAYLIST (Dragon’s personal playlist)

AWESOME TOGETHER WITH THE BABE PLAYLIST (self explanatory)

-macho sleeps in bare minimum Pjs and dragon wears a full on dragon onesie

-they cook together but macho had a home chef as a kid so he kinda bad at it so dragon helps a lot and they have fun!

-Dragon LOVES to share his favourite Chinese dishes and macho demolishes it ALL

-play Roblox together (macho always convinces him play the dress up games but they still have fun)

Smm: “UGH who does SHE think she is getting a higher rating then my GNARLY outfit!!!”

Dragon: “ Your outfit is my favourite so it wins in my eyes!”

Smm: “thanks babe let’s beat these bogus outfits!”

OK THAT'S ALL OMG THIS IS SO LONG BUT I'M LOW KEY DELUSIONAL ABOUT SPINKICKS

if you read this far, thanks for listening to my crazy rambling about my rare pair! I love 'em so much and expect more spinkicks content in the future!

[animationadventures]

It's merge time in Total Drama!

I'm fine with everybody currently left except Ripper. How the heck is Ripper still here? He should have been gone at least three times already.

The challenge was meh. The egg hunt reminded me of "Rapa-Phooey" from World Tour and "No One Eggspects the Spanish Opposition" from All-Stars, but less interesting because it doesn't have a gimmick like the Easter Island heads of past campers or the variety of mutant creatures the eggs came from and the different sizes of the eggs themselves.

I really appreciated the scene where Bowie told Raj that they needed to put their mutual romantic interest in each other on pause for the game and that they could go on a date after the show finished. Bowie showed his ability to separate romance from the game, which is something you don't see often.

Fractures are starting to show in Priya and Millie's friendship, judging by Priya's reaction to Millie accepting immunity.

I'm not upset about the double elimination; with the slightly bigger cast than previous seasons, it was a necessity. My problem is who was in the double. It's been a while since we had a medical evacuation on the show, so we were probably due, I'm just bummed out that it was the hockey bros, especially so soon after Raj told about the kiss and Bowie put their potential relationship on pause.

Aside from my obvious push for Ripper to go, I think a better double would have been Chase and Emma. I just didn't enjoy them this episode, and they were kinda getting stale. This way, we could see Bowie keep his promise to separate game from relationship, and we could see Wayne being more of a wingman for Raj.

Please watch the Total Drama reboot as much as you can on Cartoon Network and/or Max! This is the only way we can tell executives that we want a third season of the reboot.

[the-zapped-part-timer]

Penn Zerothon Day 12

Lady Starblaster💫

My Ramblings: It's party time, people! School dance for what? Just because! Poor Terry got beaten by Sashi for the third time so far. Love how Penn just casually kills Larry and is such a dance machine (Larry is ok, but damn boy). He's git to have people focus in him.

And here's me at a dance, I mean, Rippen, at the dance... not dancing. "That's it, idiots. Dance your lives away, when you could be standing next to the punch bowl with your arms crossed." Wonder what school was like for him, not very kind I'm sure.

Penn's got dancing fever! Flinging Phyllis around and making her feel 1,014 again. Wait, what was that Phyllis? Whatever, she had fun.

HOLD UP! Wonky continuity! Remember back at when I bought up this before in "Brainzburgerz?" There's a picture of him in the Galaxy World and at the beginning of "Number One Number Two", they're in that world! So, what the heck!? Unless I'm over analyzing and when he said: "What am I wearing?" Maybe he meant like, "Hey? Where's my swim suit? We're at the beach." That doesn't really make sense either... this show and my brain sometimes.

Time to impress the space dictator, Count Destructo by stealing an entire planets water, like you do! To answer Rippen's question, he'd be a viscount, if he was made one. Also, I can see where Larry is coming from now about Rippen being a nurturing person, he was like that at the end of "It's a Colorful Life." How many times could've Rippen been like that off screen? I also get that it is Larry and not totally reliable, but still. Rippen would make an okay nurse, I believe.

Way to assume that the captain is a man, Rippen. Get with the times, old man! I know it's for the reveal, but it's funny he just assumed the gender.

And the reveal of Lady Starblaster herself, and damn, I'd be like Rippen too. But he falls instantly and so hard for her after 10 literal seconds of seeing her. He's down baaaaad. Even fantasizing spending a lifetime with her, 10 seconds y'all. Also he doesn't know a damn thing about her but he just assumes she the time to throw a vicious snake at him... or maybe that's just something he's into. I don't judge, like how I don't judge them drinking out of Larry's head on a date. Larry would be cool with that. I would go their wedding but I don't know if I'd do well with volcanos, it would also be awkward to just see three kids dangling off the edge.

Also the song lyrics to this fantasy?:

You make my heart so cold

So cold, it chills my bones

Baby, there's no one who scares me like you do

I'm so afraid of you

Rip on my heart

I'M OBSESSED!

This poor woman having to deal with guys like him fantasizing about her and calling her beautiful. She gives him 10 seconds to surrender or perish, which, hey! That's the same amount of time it took to fall in love with you! And he's totally entranced by her that she literally has to snap him out of his daze to remind him that he will die. Larry's face during the count down was of concern while Rippen? Pure bliss. Right so, Larry is gonna try and wingman ol' Rip and it works put pretty well. I mean we get to hear him say "totes adorbs." That's a win in my book. He's so cringe. Thank goodness she takes the compliment well.

Ooo, she can cock her eyebrow just as good as him. She's serving. God I can't handle his cuteness, it's overbearing! Lady Starblaster stop! Your killing me!

I wanna know what it was like for the Trio to wear those robots, how did they walk? It doesn't matter, but I'm curious. Like stilts?

Would you try a space rat on a cracker? Do you think that would taste good? Rippen says so, but I've seen what he puts in his mouth (I'll bring that up later, trust me). Larry just takes three and hasn't even tried them yet, his face.

Flurgle Burgle is dead, she just yeeted that poor space pig into a robot WILHELM SCREAM. Just... wow.

This dork is so nervous he's got pit stains on his metal suit and all he has to say to that is "thank you." This man has no rizz. Larry is being flung and pushed to every which way this episode.

I desperately always want her to answer Rippen's "is your boyfriend coming" question with: "No, but my girlfriend will after her yoga class." I bet her dating pool is rough, luckily she has a highly specific thing for men who have hair like a skunk monster. Which I don't believe at all, sorry Rip. God the face he makes when she says that is priceless.

Damn, she's like, uber evil. I bet Rippen had a lot of hard feelings and lechery for her in that very moment. Too bad Penn's ocean blue eyes somehow caught Rippen's attention. God, the man can't get through a sentence around her at all without being horny. Poor Penn and co have to watch this unfold. Rippen is so freaking tall compared to her.

Yes take him to the pump room- I mean the heroes, take them to to room with all the water...

Maybe this man does have rizz, he's gonna have a dance with her! His little giggle, I just AAAAAAHHHHHHH! This gives Penn an idea and luckily it works out because Rippen doesn't know how to dance. Bringing it back around! He has to accept, Penn has won Middleburg's Snazziest Feet award three times. So Penn gets to have a silly dancing lesson with his art teacher and than Rippen will shoot him into the vacuum of space, sounds good. Why does Larry have a violin in his robot stomach hatch thing? Why wouldn't he?

Just this scene, I'm speechless. Penn is being actually so helpful, I can't wait for Starblaster and Rippen to dance! Be a shame if the heroes got loose of their cuffs and Sashi had access to her laser blaster. Such a shame.

"Never send a man to do a woman's job." Starblaster, she ate. Sashi? Agrees and tries to kill her. She succeeds in the fight and lets her dangle over her watery grave.

No need to fear, Rippen is here! With the power of skunk hair! He really sold on the idea of be married to her by a giant bat, huh? Too bad she isn't and tosses him and Larry over to their watery grave, thank goodness to Larry's strength! She never was interested, like a sane woman to be honest.

Remember that Larry has a jetpack? She didn't. Nobody betrays his bestie! He just scoops her up and she tries to convince him join her, get rid of Rippen and they can rule the galaxy tog- nope! He says: "Get away from him, you witch." A very clear Aliens reference, which is so damn good because she is voice by Sigourney Weaver, star of Aliens and who said that line... but with bitch instead, which Larry should have said. Let Larry say bitch! AND THAN HE KILLS HER! HE GOT HER, SHE'S DEAD. DROWNS.

Rippen loves her even more after that double-crossing and wishes he had gotten that dance. And Larry like the bestie he is, asks for a dance.... my heart. Rippen checks around first and than HE ACCEPTS! I'M GOING TO EAT MY HAND!

Star Wars Tie Fighter sound. Oh yeah, the heroes save the day and return all the water.

Rippen thanks Larry for always having his back and Larry's like: "That's what best friends are for." Then Rippen dips him, I CAN'T-

Oh, hey, that Count Destructo is here. That guy. That's not what matters, what matters is that he says: "Hey, what up, Boyyyy?" HE'S SO CRINGE, I LOVE HIM! I LOVE HIM AND LARRY.

Lady Starblaster lives! And a fish thing promptly falls in love with her. What does she doe? Xenomorph-mouths the fish! JUMPSCARE!

~The Characters~

Penn Zero: Snazzy boy snazzes it up and saves the day! Bu this ain't about him.

Boone Wiseman: He has one line, and it's good.

Sashi Kobayashi: She should have finished the job, but I'm glad she didn't.

Rippen: SUCH CRINGE! SUCH A LOVESICK FOOL! Every scene with him and Lady Starblaster is cringe and adorable! I usually don't like the idea of "guy falls instantly in love with a woman he has no chance with and can't shut up about it" but I really enjoyed this. Rippen is such a dork, he's cringe but free. But realistically, I wouldn't want his to happen to me (sort of did?)... unless it was him.

Larry: Such a wingman, he was there trying his best to help that hopeless romantic. He's a true bestie!

Dimension(s): We have seen this world before, but briefly, it's space. No one can hear you try to rizz.

Forms: I love Penn and Sashi's hair. That's it really.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Amber🤠

My Ramblings:

~The Characters~

Penn Zero:

Boone Wiseman:

Sashi Kobayashi:

Rippen:

Larry:

Dimension(s):

Forms:

[vivid-ink]

Hello babe <3 If you don't already know, I am obsessed with your story the Love Shack! Since it has come to a beautiful close I figure it was time to pay my respects and let you know specifically why this story is so fantastic.

First of all let me start by saying, I was so entranced by this story and emotional over it that after reading the last chapter I ended up talking about it with my boyfriend for over an hour! He let me reccount the whole story in full detail while we ate dinner and let me tell you, he got invested!! At first he was just listening to be nice to me but it got to a point where when I would pause to scarf down food for a few minutes he would get so impatient for me to continue. He's just glaring at me like "Bitch, what did Neyomi do? You can't leave me hanging like that!" I thoroughly enjoyed it, so basically he too is a fan now.

Girl, the way I went into this series thinking "ooh this will be a nice steamy threesome" and then somehow ended up balling my eyes out with every chaper, ILLEGAL! You had me crying within the first few paragraphs of the last chapter. Just for some perspective I actually don't remember the last time I legitimately cried full on while reading. I was holding back sobs so my roomate wouldn't come check up on me. Needless to say, you had me in a chokehold, sis. And I'm living for it! This will definitely be one of my favorite stories to reread and I think about it very often.

I could go on and on about the specific reasons I feel that this story enraptured me, but here are just a few.

Your depiction of Neteyam is honest to Eywa one of my all time favorites! Not only do I feel like he is very representative of the canon character but also extremely captivating. One of the reasons I think Neteyam (and truly all Na'vi men) is so hot is becuase of the raw male power tha radiates off of him, and I mean in the best way possible. Like other Na'vi males he shows that he can be a provider and protector (which biologically does something to me so I can not be blamed for finding this appealing haha) while also holding himself with a confidence and sense of responsibility that only a true man can capture. You get so many reminders of this power in your writing, even just in the way you describe his attire. Things like his battle band and sheathed knife or bow all serve as visual reminders that Neteyam is a respectable powerful and influential male that will someday be Olo'eyktan. And then to see him crumble and shake and quiver for Neyomi....that is so hot! I'm not sure if any of that made sense but basically, you nailed Neteyam. (not mad about the double meaning there haha).

Then there's Lo'ak who I have decided is the MVP in this story AND NO ONE CAN CHANGE MY MIND! He shows such a wonderful side of Lo'ak's character that doesn't often get displayed. He is still rebellious and free and a troublemaker, but deep down he loves his brother so much and isn't wiling to let Neteyam get in his own way of his happiness. Not only did the poor man have to witness Neyomi and Neteyam disregard his advice constantly while he suffered to watch but he straight up took a few punches in the face just to get Neteyam to work out his own shit. That is the fire I love about, Lo'ak. Consequences be damned, he will do what needs to be done. He is the ultimate wingman and I truly love him so much in this story. Without him let's face it, those two would have ended up miserable. He is the hero of this story and the main person that made me hold onto hope throughout each chapter.

Neyomi was also such a beautiful character. She is a perfect blend of independant and strong while still embracing her feminine side. I love seeing female characters like this because it shows that this duality exists and it's okay to embrace our own masculine and feminine traits within each of us. Sure she was stubborn as heck (and so was Neteyam of course) but she never completely surrendered herself to grief. She let herself cry and feel her emotions, but still tried to press forward with her life no matter how much her heart ached. I respect that.

What I'm trying to get at babe is that you have TALENT! Your storytelling completely transported me and I wish I could read the whole thing again for the first time. Please write a book or something because I would genuinly read an 800 page book if it meant you were the author. Thank you for all the time and efffort that you have put into your stories and into this community. I know how long projects like these take and I really do appreciate you putting the work in. I hope you have fabulous day! Thanks for reading my very long ramble. Sending you many forehead kisses <3

Oh my goodness, @wheneclipsefalls THANK YOU for your amazing message! I can't believe you got your boyfriend invested in 'The Love Shack'! Your storytelling skills must be A+++ if you recounted it all to him & it kept his interest! 🤣 My husband sighs every time I start talking about Avatar lol!

GURLLL, we all go crazy for a big, strong man who has a good balance of dominance and tenderness... I'm glad you like my portrayal of an adult Neteyam. 😁 I try to keep my characters as well-balanced & as true to canon as I feel they should be. As for my OCs, I always create a little mindmap of them and what their personalities/characteristics are before I start writing. It's like I need to bring life to them that way first. I wanted Neyomi to have a good balance of hard and soft, if that makes sense (I feel like I always write my female leads this way, in different ways), so I'm happy if you feel I've nailed this. I seem to have an inability to write quick drabbles (you may have noticed lol), so the result is usually fleshed out characters and fleshed out plots. 😛 Lo'ak is absolutely MVP #1 in 'The Love Shack'. I often see Neteyam being touted as the 'bestest big bro ever', which I completely agree with. I wanted to portray a more mature Lo'ak who loves & appreciates his big bro, so I thought what better way to do this than to have him repay the favour and look out for Neteyam. 🥰

You want me to write a book?? 🥹 I'm so flattered. I kind of did, in a way. My first Neteyam story 'Violet Eyes' is 20 chapters and 150k words. I always promote this work because it's my proudest achievement to date. It's a real unpredictable rollercoaster with a completely original narrative. Give it a try if you haven't & I hope you love it too.

Honestly, thank you for taking the time to leave me your message. This past 10 months has been full of creative fulfilment writing for the ATWOW fandom. All my works are in my masterlist. It is always such a JOY to hear from readers who have been moved by my work. You have absolutely made my day, my lovely. 😘😘😘 Thank you, THANK YOU so much for your support. A thousand forehead kisses back at ya. xx

[gtzel]

Why do people chose to be jerks?

So about four months ago i was at my youth group chillin with my friend, when these two boys came up and sat next to us. I thought nothing of it and continued my conversation. One says ‘excuse me’ a few times before I finally realize that he was talking to me. He says that his friend (who was sitting next to him) thinks I was cute. (This was the first time someone had complimented me on my looks)

I got flustered and thanked him before bashfully turning and continuing my convo. A minute later the boys get my attention again. The one asks if I can give my number to his friend, to which I politely decline. I then proceed to get up with my friend and leave bc I was flustered and couldn’t talk right. The night ends and I go home thinking about the boy. I was so happy.

Fast forward a few weeks, and i haven’t seen him, but his friends continue to wingman for him. After about a month I finally decide to talk to them, the boy was there and I ask him his name, which(for privacy reasons I will change it) his friend tells me, is joe. So I try talking to joe directly but he pulls his hood up and walks away. Weird.

A few more weeks pass and I talk to his friends, they tell me how ‘much he likes me’ and ‘how he talks about me all the time’ which, okay…weird, but I was flattered. I ask them if they are telling the truth to which they promise me it is. So, I ask for his number through his friends, and they give me it.

I text the number asking if it is him, to which the owner of the number says no, and to please not text. Weird…but I figured that ‘maybe his friends just missed a digit or something’ and blow it off. I continue talking to joes friends, who try to talk him up to me. (Note that I have never even heard this guy talk b4) I try to talk to him a few times, but he just walks away. I assume that he’s just shy, or awkward.

So skip to this past week, at my youth group. I see him, but have already gotten over him. Telling myself that it would never work out anyways. But when I see him with his friends, they keep side eyeing me. Weirrrd….but whatever. I finally decide to chalk it up and finally try talking to him.

When I got to talk to him he blatantly ignores me. Very weird…. So I ask his friend why he was ignoring me. To which he replies that he didn’t know. I walk away, but a few minutes later they both come over to me to talk.

I’m excited, I can finally talk to joe! My heart rate is pulsing, and I’m a flustered mess. Joe speaks and says “yeah, so I’m actually not interested in you at all. My friends were just joking around and it didn’t mean anything” my heart sinks. I say something like ‘oh yeah, I wasn’t interested either, i just wanted a friend’ or whatever, but inside I’m devastated.

These guys played with my feelings for 4 months! They flirted with me, made me feel wanted, and happy. But it was all a joke to them. Some kind of sick game that toyed with my feelings. I didn’t cry, because that would just be pathetic, but I felt like someone ripped out my heard and tore it apart.

I forgive them for doing that to me, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not hurt. I already have issues with relationships, and abandonment, and rejection. But now they are all the worse. I was really hurt, and still am. I feel like trash, unwanted and unappreciated. And I don’t think I’ll be able to trust anyone with my heart like that again for a long time.

I know it was all fun and games for them, but what they did, flattering me and then rejecting me, it really hurt.

So I hope you can learn a lesson from my mistakes. Don’t let people play with you. That’s not to say you should shut people out completely, just guard your heart. People don’t deserve to feel the way I feel, especially if they are already insecure about this stuff. Just remember that, Jesus loves you, and will never reject you. He accepts you for who you are, and will always be there for you. People can be jerks, heck! They chose to be jerks, but we should still forgive them.

If you read this far, feel free to ask me anything if you need to. Thanks for reading through my long vent, and I hope you have a great day. God bless, and goodnight.

[innytoes]

Hi Inny. What about # 18 for fuck AI prompts, where omega Luke always has a lot of alphas making offers, but when it comes down to it he only wants beta!Alex?

“Dude, what the heck, she was smoking hot!” Reggie said, as another disappointed alpha moved away. Luke shrugged. He knew Reggie was only helping him out, being his wing-man as usual, but Luke’s heart just wasn’t in it. He knew he had to find someone, his pheromones clearly letting everyone know he was in pre-heat, which got him a lot of attention. Reggie, who’d had his heat a couple of weeks ago, was enjoying the flirting and attention that hanging out with Luke was getting him, but he seemed to be getting concerned when Luke turned down the fourth interested alpha of the night.

“Dude, if this isn’t your scene, we can go to another bar,” he offered. “Or like, the music store. Or, I dunno, a book store, if you want to pick up some hot older guy in a cardigan.”

“That’s more your speed, Reg,” Luke joked, bumping their shoulders together. “I dunno, I just… there was something off about her.” Her smile was too sharp, her scent prickling his nose in a way that made him want to scrunch it up. “Besides, it’s fine, Alex said he’d help me out if I couldn’t find anyone.”

Reggie waved at the bartender to close their tab, even though they’d only paid for the first round of drinks. What could Luke say, between the arms and his scent, he knew he was a hot commodity. They left the bar, Reggie making sure nobody was following them, his arm slung around Luke possessively. It usually worked, from a distance, anyway. Reggie did a great alpha swagger, and between the leather jacket and the body posture, people wouldn’t know they were two omegas unless they came close.

“So how many heats are we going to have to do this little charade before you and Alex just admit you’re into each other and get together?” Reggie asked casually.

“Dude!” Luke said, face flushing.

“What? I’m just saying, it’s not that I don’t enjoy the flirting, but it hurts my heart a little to see you turn down all those incredibly beautiful people.” He made puppy eyes at Luke. Yeah, when Luke was Reggie’s wingman, it was usually more about reigning him in and helping him make smart and safe choices. Pre-heat Reggie was a little reckless sometimes.

“I’ll talk to him about it,” Luke muttered, as if he hadn’t said that the last two heats. And smack dab in the middle of his last heat and this one, when Reggie had insisted that maybe it would be easier to talk when they weren’t all hot and heavy and pheromone-addled. Reggie just gave him a knowing look, and a ‘uhuh’, but didn’t push the rest of the way home.

When they got home, Luke stopped in the hallway, taking a deep breath in. His and Reggie’s scents mingled with Alex’ perfectly, soft and warm and home. Why would he ever want anything more than that?

Alex looked up from his book when they came in, smiling. “Hey, any luck?” he asked, and was Luke imagining the slight hunt of apprehension in his voice.

“Nope,” Reggie said, throwing his leather jacket at Luke and flopping down on top of Alex, who shoved him off. “Got some free drinks, though.”

“Yeah, your diet coke probably really set them back,” Alex snarked. Reggie seemed unaffected, though, toeing off his shoes and shoving his toes under Alex’ thigh as Luke flopped down on Alex’ lap as well.

Alex didn’t push him off.

“Guess you’re stuck with me for another heat,” he said casually, hopefully. “I mean, if that’s okay.”

“Of course,” Alex said, a little too quickly to be casual.

Thankfully, Alex didn’t see the giant eye-roll Reggie gave them. Luke snuggled in, head under Alex’ chin as Alex wrapped his arms around Luke, holding the book open on one of Luke’s splayed knees. He smelled so good, like a sea breeze, like a bed with freshly washed sheets, like a warm safe hug.

What could some knothead at a bar possibly have to offer that Alex didn’t? Sure, he was a beta, but who cared about that? Alex was always so gentle with him, always made sure he drank enough in between heats, that he ate, that he was comfortable and clean. Alex never got rough or annoyed when Luke got bossy, never tried to ‘put him in his place’ as an omega. He could be a little snarky, yeah, but he was never mean to him when Luke was in heat.

“Reg, you have plans?” Alex asked, which was way subtler than ‘you’re fucking off in the morning, right?’ Reggie beamed.

“Oh yeah, me and Bobby are going to do that Spicy Noodle Challenge again,” he said, beaming as if Bobby hadn’t sent them a selfie of him, stone-faced, while Reggie was sitting next to him crying, his face flaming, chugging a glass of milk with an almost full plate in front of him, last time. Luke shook his head in disbelief. At least it would keep him busy. And thankfully, Bobby’s apartment had two bathrooms. “Maybe have a Star Wars marathon, or play the pier a little. I’ll stop by in a day or two and fill up your supplies, okay?”

“Thanks, Reg,” Alex said, relieved. They kept the place well-stocked, but it did ease Alex’ anxiety a lot to know they could rely on Reggie should anything run out.

“I’m going to hit the hay so I can get out of here bright and early,” Reggie said, because they all knew Luke’s heat always struck at the most inconvenient times. “You two be good, have fun, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” He stood up, leaning over and pressing a kiss to both their foreheads. “Except fuck in my bed, if you fuck in my bed, the only thing I’m bringing you is Spicy Noodles.”

“Good night, Reg,” Alex said pointedly, and Reggie laughed, before heading off to bed.

They sat quietly for a while, Alex reading his book, Luke just breathing in his scent and toying with the strings of his hoodie, running it over his nose, his lips, as Alex nuzzled his noise in Luke’s hair. When he finished his  chapter, he put the book away, but instead of getting up, his arms just curled around Luke again. “Sleeping in my bed tonight?” he asked. That way, if Luke woke up from his heat starting, he didn’t need to stumble all the way down the hall to Alex’ room.

Also, not that either of them would admit it, but Luke certainly slept better with Alex there.

“Yeah,” he agreed. Alex smiled, and squeezed him a little, before gently herding Luke off his lap so they could go brush their teeth and get ready for bed. Luke smiled when he saw that Alex had already taken out Luke’s favourite nesting blanket and put it on the end of the bed, and he waited for Luke to get everything perfect before sliding into bed with him.

“Night, Lu,” he said, covering Luke’s hands from where he’d wrapped them around Alex. Alphas never let him be the big spoon, even outside of heat, which was another reason why Alex rocked. That, and his sense of humour, and his smile, and his killer voice, and that swoopy thing his hair did, and…

Okay, so maybe he was a little in love with Alex. He’d talk about it later, after his heat was done.

He wasn’t going to chicken out again.

[simslegacy5083]

NSB (Straud Legacy) Gen 8 Ep. 22: Getting Out There

Chance and Peachy left their renovated homestead to enjoy a night out as single men about town, looking to make connections and memories.

The elder of the pair had signed up for mix & mingle a while ago but been afraid to make a match. When Peachy announced his own plans to perform at an open mic night Chance took the opportunity to setup his first date at the same venue so his young roommate could serve as wingman.

---------------------------------------------

Peachy’s stand-up was comfortable and successful, but Chance’s date was anything but.

She had seemed lovely on paper, but in person Cristal’s intense energy was way too much for the immortal elder still anxious about putting his heart back out there. He tried to keep a polite distance from his eager young date as he shot Peachy covert “Get Me Out of Here” looks.

Fortunately, his distant heir’s high social skill picked up on his need and delivered. Peachy’s “unbearable stomachache” brought the show and the date Chance wasn’t quite ready for to an abrupt end, and the two men got the heck out of there, leaving a confused and suspicious Cristal behind.

---------------------------------------------

For himself, Peachy was still quite happy being single. There was at least one old friend who seemed to be trying to change his opinion, however.

Kassandra’s invite to the realm for a duel was nothing unusual, but her flirtatious banter after the match was completely unexpected. Flustered, Peachy made a hasty excuse to leave and exited the dueling grounds so fast he lost control of his broom!

---------------------------------------------

Picking himself up off the ground after a very rough landing peachy took a moment to reflect on his panic.

He usually knew exactly what to do in social situations but not when it came to romance. According to his dad there was nothing better than being in love with that “special someone” and he and mom were certainly happy, but Peachy had never felt or wanted that sort of connection.

He wasn’t in any hurry to be in a relationship, but he hated feeling so unsure of what he truly did want from love someday. Texting an apology to his friend for rushing off he headed home. Although he stayed up a bit looking around online, he didn’t find any answers that night, just better questions.

---------------------------------------------

Peachy felt on much firmer footing when it came to his new friendship with Jack.

Whether they were discussing a case they were working on or enjoying some downtime over a game of chess Peachy appreciated having a friend on the force and felt like the senior detective’s guidance was really helping him get a handle on his new job.

The duo even discovered they were neighbors! Jack also lived in Brindleton, just across the bay in Cavalier Cove.

---------------------------------------------

After work Jack invited his protégé out to their local bar as a thank you for all his hard work and help since he’d come onboard.

Peachy had Jack laughing right away – it was almost too easy to make him smile.

Over their drinks talk turned to more personal matters. Peachy was interested to hear that the older Sim was also happily single and pretty much always had been. Most of the adult sims Peachy knew were or had been in serious committed relationships, but Jack seemed perfectly successful and content all on his own. If it worked for his friend and mentor, then maybe it would work for Peachy also.

Some semi-competitive pub games ended the evening on a high note. Both Sims agreed they’d have to get together outside of the office again soon!

---------------------------------------------

The next morning Peachy rose from his bed with a smile on his face; confident once more in his current relationship status.

What he couldn’t possibly know was that across the Bay Jack was also waking up but in a much less settled frame of mind. He’d experienced an intensely flirty dream the night before… starring Peachy!

[checkoutmybookshelf]

Would the Awake and Present Timeline Joanne Please Stand Up?

Depending on the day you catch me on, I will tell you ether that Coyote Dreams is my favorite books of the series or that it is tied for the top spot with Mountain Echoes. Either way, this is a damn good book. Joanne is finally ahead of the curve for once, and she's learned to both lower the blast walls and raise shields--but more important she's learned when to do those things and why. Not that any of this means that Joanne's life is anything but messy, in a glorious, tangled, way that is a blast to watch unfold. Oh, and she has to convince a Navajo god that she isn't actually the harbinger of the end of days, which is somehow STILL less embarrassing than Morrison casually saying that he gave his piece of topaz to Barbara Bragg. Let's talk Coyote Dreams.

This is your obligatory SPOILER WARNING. You know the drill, folks.

Ok, so I'm skimping on the plot summary on this book for two reasons. One, I very much want you to GO READ THIS BOOK. It's worth it, I promise. Two, this is my blog and I want to just highlight all my favorite parts of this book, because frankly? There are SO MANY and this book is just AMAZING.

The TLDR of the plot is that Joanne accidentally woke up and gave a signal to a Navajo god that it's end of days, so Begochidi starts putting people to sleep and siphoning off their life force to keep himself awake and powerful enough to lead his people to the next world. Meanwhile, Joanne suddenly has a social life that gets wildly out of control as she and Morrison date a pair of fraternal twins and Joanne gets JEALOUS AF. This social life gets twisted up with her day job (police officer) and calling (shaman) as people she loves start to fall asleep and cannot be woken up. She manages to keep Gary awake though, and we love that for her. Eventually, Joanne steals her 13-year-old self's competence with her own magic and convinces Begochidi that she isn't the herald of the end times and he can go back to sleep. Everyone wakes up and it's all good, and Joanne takes a promotion from Morrison instead of a date, to both of their very complicated feels about it. The end.

Ok, now, on to the things I adore about this book. And we're gonna use headings, because that's pretty fun for me.

Joanne Wakes Up In Bed with a Boy She Didn't Sleep With

This book starts off with Joanne waking up next to a strange man. It's kind of hilarious, and we spend 3/4 of the first chapter sorting out who the heck this very cute man is and how we feel about the cute man and how we feel about being IN the situation, because this is very outside of normal for Joanne. Genuinely, the clear communication, priorities, and internal monologue in this whole section are amazing because the flip-flopping between "What the SHIT am I doing right now???" and "daaaaaaaaaaaaaang, this man is pretty" is both hilarious and deeply relatable.

Especially once Gary shows up and chaos gremlins the whole thing by switching between concerned friend, dad figure out to terrify the boy he found his daughter figure with, and wingman. I love when Gary brings the chaos gremlin energy, and he keeps leaving Mark's number around the apartment for Joanne to find to make sure she has the option for a social life and boyfriend if she wants.

The fact that Mark is one half of the manifestation of the sleeping sickness that is spreading throughout the novel is...regrettable. Because he's cute, polite, he cooks, and he made the bed. But he's part of the problem, and more than that, part of the problem is that Mark is not Morrison.

Joanne Pisses Off Doc Holliday

Ok, so, when Billy Holliday gets trucked off to the hospital in a coma, Morrison drags Joanne there to see if she can help. When a doctor walks in all offended by the drum and the laying on of hands, he "simply hit all my arrogant-prick medical-professional buttons" and Joanne lets him absolutely HAVE it. I'm just gonna let her speak for herself at this point, because nothing I could say could possibly make it any better:

"This is Mrs. Holliday. Oh, you've met. [...] So I'm sure you understand that whatever's going on in here is happening with her approval, which makes it, let me see, what's the phrase I'm looking for here. Oh yeah. None of your goddamn business. [...] Does it appear to you that anyone in this room is providing illegal medical advice, or in fact trying to remove Mr. Holliday from the hospital's expert care? [...] I didn't think so. I'm sure you're familiar with the idea of positive thoughts and prayer shoring up the ill, Doctor, even if you don't subscribe to its usefulness yourself. [...] That's what I thought. But you'd hardly deny the family and friends of an ill man the chance to surround him with those thoughts and prayers, would you? I didn't think so."

And she spends this entire monologue aggressively backing him out of the room, only for Melinda to explain that he is actually Billy's brother.

I love how far this represents Joanne having come from book 1, because book 1 Joanne would have been entirely on Doc Holliday's side. She'd have rolled her eyes SO HARD at faith healing and the idea that anything other than medical science could help Billy. And now, just two and a bit books later, she's actively and aggressively slapping down someone who is hardcore only western medicine. It's such great character growth, and I cannot do anything but LOVE how hard Joanne goes to protect and support her people.

Even if in doing so without first surveying the room she accidentally pisses off the person she's going to have to work with once Melinda goes to sleep as well. Which leads to a whole great "look, I was a dick and we disagree, but can we just bury the hatchet and make this work?" arc.

Joanne's Ongoing Battle With Laurie Corvallis Begins

Laura "Laurie" Corvallis is a reporter who will keep showing up in the rest of the books, and we kind of love how tenacious, self-aware, and wholly ruthless she is. Most of that comes from her later book interactions, but we are introduced to her here when she shoves a microphone in Joanne's face immediately after Morrison goes, "Whatever you do, do NOT talk to the press" because a quarter of the precinct is now in comas.

Laurie Corvallis knows a lead when she sees one though, and she spends a lot of time watching and following Joanne. Joanne buys her cameraman's loyalty with a burger, and ultimately fucks this first interaction up because she actually gave Corvallis a lead that both did and did not pan out. So basically, Joanne made herself interesting to the reporter who is just barely not a muckraker. She will never, ever be free of this woman.

Joanne Loses Her Absolute Shit In Public During a Double Date

Ok, so this meltdown. This meltdown is epic, and got a little bit of its own post on this blog because it's precipitated by Morrison making the worst possible move ever and giving the piece of topaz Joanne gave him (topaz is protective against the comas) to Barb. But that is just the catalyst; this meltdown encompasses more and needs a little setup.

So Joanne accidentally gets Coyote killed during a trek into the astral plane, and admits it to Morrison when she checks in with him at the precinct. It's already SUPER awkward, but then Barb walks in and strongarms Joanne into a double date. Joanne doesn't like Barb. Joanne is jealous AF of Barb. Joanne extremely does not want to go on a double date with Barb and Morrison. Unfortunately, we then cut to Joanne and Mark on a dinner date with Barb and Morrison, and Joanne's shamanism has come up in the context of the comas half the police force is in. Barb is PUSHING the topic, and when Joanne explains that the topaz is protective, this happens:

"The topaz works as a charm against the sleeping sickness," I heard myself add. Morrison's expression went indecipherable. "Good," he said after a moment. "I gave that piece to Barb."

I'm pretty sure that line counts as both murder and suicide. Like, this reminds me of Anthony in Shakespeare's Anthony and Cleopatra trying to do the honorable thing and falling on his sword but FUCKING IT UP. Like, there was no way out of this conversation alive for either Morrison or Joanne, but instead of mitigating the blow, Morrison landed it in the most painful way possible. Joanne is already emotionally vulnerable because her friends are in comas or dead, and the man she is absolutely gone for just basically shoved her in front of a bus. I'm way more emotionally put together than Joanne is, and I don't think I'd have managed this any better than she did.

And what Joanne did was...kind of the epic date night scene in the restaurant/restaurant parking lot. First she freezes as Barb waffles on inanely about topaz. Then she stands up. Then she BOLTS from the restaurant, taking out at least one other table as she goes. She doesn't get her car door open in time to avoid Morrison catching up to her, and when he gently touches her shoulder, she hauls off and decks him (he deserved it).

Then the words come out. With no thought for volume, propriety, or the audience of confused diners who have followed them out to the parking lot. And more than hauling off and punching Morrison, Joanne lets him have it with her words. And I suspect that this is what lands for Morrison more than the actual punch, because she manages to admit that she has feelings for him, throws his own logic and integrity in his face, throws the fact that the sleeping sickness is actually killing HIS people in his face, and finally calls his ass out for his "big dumb hero" moment actively putting him in danger. Which...is valid and true but uh...I'm pretty sure that kind of surgical takedown is pretty close to as emotionally devastating as Morrison giving Barb the topaz is. And I think those points hit because the ONLY rebuttal Morrison has to all of this is as follows:

"I'm going to cut you some slack, Walker, because a friend of yours just died. [...] But if you ever. So much as think. About throwing another punch my way, I will have you up on assault charges so fast your head will spin, and I am good and certain that your bag of tricks doesn't hold a get-out-of-jail-free card. Do I make myself perfectly clear, Officer Walker?"

If you have to fall back on literally being the boss, you've made your point, but you've lost that battle. He didn't address a single one of her valid points, or the fact that he was out of line by giving the topaz away. So uh...I'm not going to declare a WINNER here, but I think hits were scored all 'round.

This was gloriously messy as a public scene, but it also was gloriously messy in that it fully spilled the can of worms that is the weirdness of the Joanne-Morrison relationship out into the open where they can both see it and kind of can't ignore it anymore. They're gonna try, though. For like another four books.

Joanne Saves Morrison's Life

So...when you date one of the two people actively siphoning people's life force after putting them in a coma and then you hand them the thing that protects you from them...you're absolutely getting nerfed and drained dry. And I have a hard time sympathizing with Morrison about ending up on his back on his kitchen floor with Barb's hand over his heart, sucking his literal life away.

As Joanne notes, his life force is depleting WAY faster than anyone else's, because he is very close to her and unlike Billy and Mel, he doesn't know how to shield. So he is about to get very literally energy vampired to death by his girlfriend, when Joanne astral projects in and sticks her astral hand into his chest beneath Barb's, startling Barb enough to break the connection and get some damn shields on this man.

There's not a whole hell of a lot to this instance--it goes pretty quick in the book, but holy HELL is this emotionally satisfying. Joanne is vindicated about not liking Barb, she gets her own big damn hero moment, and she actually knows enough about herself and Morrison to be able to effectively shield him. The details she pulls up to link to him and create boundaries for the shield for him are really lovely and sweet and real. It's such a good moment, and it's absolutely the moment where you KNOW they are endgame.

Joanne Punches Barb in the Face

This one is pretty much what it says on the tin, and it is deeply emotionally satisfying. Like as soon as Joanne finished shielding Morrison, she winds up and hauls off a punch that takes Barb in the teeth. It's AMAZING.

Gary Helps Joanne Arm Up

Garrison Matthew Muldoon is the best human in this series, period, end of sentence. So of course when Joanne decides she needs to be drummed under to fix the sleeping sickness and prevent the end of the world on the astral plane, Gary isn't about to let her go in unarmed and unprepared.

Admittedly, his first preference would be that she not go in at all, but once it's clear that she's GOING, he plants her in her living room and then arms her up. He pulls Cernunnos's sword out from under her bed and hand it to her, before putting a copper bracelet that acknowledges her Cherokee heritage and was a gift from her father on her left wrist to protect her heart. Then on goes a silver triskelion and Celtic cross necklace from her mother, to guard her soul. Then Joanne says, "What about you? [...] Don't I get anything from you? Mother's got my soul covered and Dad's got my heart, but without you, jeez, Gary, I wouldn't be here at all. You took the damned sword out of me when I was dying so I could heal myself. And all I get is this lousy little ritual?"

My description is not doing this scene any justice whatsoever, because at this point when reading, I'm in tears right along with Joanne. And then I sob my eyes out when Gary pins his Purple Heart from the Korean War to her chest to shield her.

This is literally every arming up scene from every movie with such a scene, but it hits so beautifully hard and is all about love and protection rather than glorifying the battle. This has to be done, but it's about making sure that Joanne will be ok and make it out the other side. That Gary supports her effectively and without question or hesitation is also just heartbreakingly wonderful.

Joanne and Morrison Have a Heart to Heart Part I

Ok, so...remember when Joanne shielded Morrison? There was a small oops in there, because she accidentally hooked him up to Begochidi through her shields, and she has to fix that from his garden. Which...after the scene at the restaurant you kind of expect to be deeply confrontational and awkward, but reader and Joanne are surprised when Morrison is deeply chill and comfortable. Well, he should be, it's his head they're in.

This section is a really well done and deeply necessary follow-up to the meltdown at the restaurant, because this is where Morrison opens the door that Joanne flung open during the meltdown. It also gives Joanne a chance to come clean about her past to Morrison without the "real world" power structures and hang-ups that really prevented them from communicating this well from minute one, where Joanne publicly ribbed him for not knowing cars.

This is SUCH a good conversation, and all props to CE Murphy for writing setting in this scene, because I don't know what I was expecting for Morrison's garden, but this was PERFECT.

Joanne and Morrison Have a Heart to Heart Part II

Soooooooo...remember that bit where I said that Joanne and Morrison were going to spend the next four books trying SUPER HARD not to acknowledge that they like each other? That starts here. The last few pages of this book are Morrison coming to Joanne to ask if their previous heart to heart in his garden was real. Joanne says yes, and he's over here looking devastating and superhero-y and he very carefully and precisely asks, "Would you take a promotion?"

And literally, y'all...this question is DEVASTATING. Because a yes would mean aligning Joanne's shamanism and her day job in ways that would help her learn and grow, but more importantly would genuinely help people. A no, however, would mean...Morrison. It would probably end Joanne's career as a cop, but it would open the door to try it with him and change literally everything about her life again.

And Joanne takes the promotion. She HAS to at this point, she has more to learn, she's still healing, and she's legit terrified of herself, which means that she isn't ready to focus on a future and relationship that she knows she wants. For all that, though? This is HEARTBREAKING in the best way. I haven't seen such a well-done bittersweet ending for a book in a WHILE.

Joanne Steals Her Past

So, a lot of this book is Joanne recognizing that her past left scars that she needs to deal with, from Aidan and Ayita to her dad to Sara Buchanan to the First Boy. And all of that ties up and gets utterly tragic when Joanne realizes that to save everyone in the here-and-now, she needs the skills and knowledge that her 13-year-old self had.

So in the astral plane, she ends up back in North Carolina with her younger self, and realized two things. First, she doesn't like her younger self and the feeling is mutual. Second, she has to take those skills from herself, and the sense of loss and pain and isolation from this action significantly contributed to the choices that led to her teen pregnancy and isolation. Like, this is actually tragic, because by the time Joanne understands what happened and why, it had already happened and she has no choice but to hold her younger self in her arms and tell her she'll be all right as her older self steals the things that give this 13-year-old community, confidence, and self-worth.

Guys, I cry so hard at this scene every time. The fact that there are lives on the line--that the world is on the line--somehow still doesn't make this ok for Joanne, either at 13 or 28. It's just tragic because it's a closed loop of time so there's nothing to be done to change it. That said, knowledge is power, so adult Joanne knowing what happened and why allows her to move forward, as we'll see in subsequent books.

I just love that the real tragedy of this book is that Joanne was the architect and victim of her own life, when at all points she was doing the best she could with the information she had. And at more than one of those points, it just wasn't enough. Especially when she's young, unsupported, and in pain. The idea of self-compassion (even when it's hard, and even when 13-year-old you was an obnoxious brat) this part of the book focuses on is so important, because it's soft, it's tragic, and ultimately, it's hopeful in some very real, concrete ways.

Begochidi's Last Best Shot

Ok, so this is in here because Begochidi tries so hard to take Joanne down into sleep by giving her what he thinks she wants in dreams, and he just KEEPS. FUCKING. IT. UP. The final attempt is clever in that he lets her think she's woken up before giving her the supposed life of her dreams. But damn for Begochidi, Joanne is good at details and if she thinks she's awake, there should be a particular logic to events based on her life, and the details just...don't match up.

Joanne is allowed to think she's woken up in her apartment after a week, with both Gary and Morrison there. Except that in this reality, Morrison is dating her, she has her own mechanic shop, and Gary and Morrison sorted out whatever the alpha male bullshit they have going on. And despite all of that being stuff Joanne would LOVE, the details are wrong. If she had been in a coma for a week, Gary shouldn't still be holding her drum when she wakes up, and she should be waking up in the hospital. Not to mention that Morrison dating her--as awesome as it would be--is just too weird to track.

Like...it was a valiant effort, Begochidi, but you cannot fight an English major with an insistently logical mind with dreams. He'dve got me though, since this is one of my favorite scenes in part because we DO get that tantalizing taste of the dream.

Overall, this book is just amazing, and if you've made it this far and DON'T go read the series...I guess I applaud your 3am, insomnia-fueled fall down this rabbit hole? Also, I hope you sleep soon.

[liopleurodean]

Season 7, Episode 7: The Mentalists

A seance?

Oh, it's definitely there

A Ouija board. Wow

This is great

Still could be tricks

Lucky guess?

That's not good

Something tells me Danny doesn't want the dude to have it

Oh dear

That poor lady

Oh, Dean...

Oh, yeah, back in business

Not Baby, but still serviceable

No kidding

Dude, that's lame

But it helped, I guess

Definitely in over her head

That place is whack

Ooh, my heart hurts

Indeed

No thanks, I'll pass

Makes sense

Come on, Sam.

Pam and Missouri!

Yeah, Sam's not gonna cooperate

ASDFGHJKL OF ALL THE THINGS TO SAY TO DEAN-

He said you're a sexy holy man

Sam would laugh

Dean.

I think he is, actually

Right...

Yeah

This has got to be so offensive

The spoon didn't even bend

Easy lead

What. The heck

I'm immediately suspicious of all side characters

Not the stereotype

Wow, Dean

Nice

I like her

Mm, sorta...

Oh boy

Yeah

Didn't know, don't care

Synchronized!

Ew

This whole town is whack

Sure

Something "from Greece"

The car could use a little TLC

Friction and heat?

Whoa.

So it's going after phonies, then

Reminds me of the magician episode

Dean.

Of course

Ghost, probably

Touche

Okay then...

Yeah, why?

It's possible

Mm, yeah

As death

X-Files isn't real

Fair enough

Yeah

I miss Baby

This is gonna be fun

Oh boy

Good advice, at least

That's probably also offensive

Oh dear

Wow.

Poor girl

Lots of suspicious things in there

That, was spirit activity

She looks familiar to me, which is weird as all get out

Of course

That ain't what ectoplasm looks like

Campbells?

Ouch

Oh come on

Dean.

Wow...

Aw, Ellen!

That sounds like her

I would

Soulless!Sam all over again

A hunter's life is messy

Touche

Okay

Ouch

Don't tell him to stop being a jerk, I don't think I could take it

You gonna help, Dean?

Maybe

Uh oh

It's not her

It's the older sister

Why are Zippos so unreliable in Hollywood?

They didn't, though

Body language!

Oh boy

Salt and iron, now

Uh oh

Aw, I want a Dean hug

I called that

Yeah

That's concerning

Taking turns

Yeah, I guess it is weird

Nice

Uh oh

Hey, that's an idea?

Huh...

Popular, I guess

Probably her

Touche

Yes, please

For the most part

As far as we can see

Rip Sam

That's creepy

And that's just weird

Hamlet

Not yet

Unless the wind blows it out

Yikes

So don't?

So was Sam, for a while

She speaks!

Well crap

Isn't he?

Whack her with the crowbar!

Took him long enough

Good riddance

Yikes

Dean.

Yeah

Wingman Sam

Yeah, well

Yeah, they do

Mmhmm

Palm reading, that's adorable

Heck yeah

Not currently

Was he?

It'll happen less, now that he's shared

Yeah.

Oh, there's definitely a curve

[goleb]

Who is Allison

This is Allison. 

Allison is the eldest of the Mayweather siblings - followed by Stanley and Stella (or as you know her, Special One) and a friend of Roy's (mind you, against his will, not that he really minds the company). Sort of lost the ability to care about anything over the years, which helps her exude a perhaps misplaced air of coolness and slight edge. She still pretty cool though. 

Kinda sorta maybe perhaps was the one responsible for accidentally losing her sister to the love cult that one time, landing her on the very bottom of the Roy Gribbleston’s Babysitter Assessment Scale™. She was much younger then... got distracted, y'see. Still can't live that accident down, though her sister is back home again. Gets better eventually, and is definitely a lot more mature now, but Roy would still advise you do not hire her to look after your kids.