#WHY is he so hot when he’s in battle mode

[wildsaltair]

[dxxdhood]

drains me slowly

pairing: wade wilson x gn!reader

summary: deadpool finally invites you, the coworker he has a massive crush on, over, which means the two of you end up doing more than just watching a movie.

tags: smut (18+), sub!wade wilson, dom!reader, pain kink, use of superpowers to fuel a pain kink, light masochism, teasing, gentle dom, hand job, scratching, body worship

wc: 3.3k

a/n: fic inspired by the new deadpool movie coming out!!! also, title is from love me dead by ludo.

No surprise that Wade wasn’t exactly anyone’s favorite– that goes for among the heroes he’s worked with and throughout his life in general. He’s – to put it in the kindest way anyone’s ever told him – fucking annoying. Oh, he’s more than aware that he’s a little too out-of-pocket, abrasive, impulsive– a nightmare to interact with, really. And those were just the recent comments made by the closest thing he has to coworkers! The shit he heard from people growing up was leagues worse. 

Look, having a rough start in life isn’t uncommon and he’s sure as hell not gonna get the tiny violin out for himself and throw his own little pity party, but he’s grown enough since his healing factor got beat out of him to acknowledge that he’s had it tough over the years.

He’s still going, though! Yeah, he may not always be the best at doing his laundry quick enough to get any clean clothes to wear, or at stopping his room from becoming cluttered with too many half-empty water bottles, but he’s still making it by, day by day.

But, well, it’s still really hard to constantly put himself out there, get assigned – or infinitely more likely, just shove himself into – whatever jobs or missions he feels like taking on when everyone treats him like Jar Jar Binks.

That was until you came along. So, obviously you’re crazy hot – he’s gotta get that out of the way first – but more than that, you were confident. Competent, too, and those rarely coincide in Wade’s experience. You mostly worked on call, joining the occasional mission, battle, or investigation because your mutant powers came in handy often, but you also still kept up with your day job. Honestly, Wade thinks the reason why you weren’t always present in fights was to stop the other mutants from being out of a job. Your ability to slowly deteriorate surrounding biological tissue, while horrifying and a pain in the ass to control – your words – was basically winning on easy mode.

But no, you were adamant about keeping your involvement with the X-Men infrequent– only joining when your presence was absolutely necessary. Apparently nonstop high stress situations aren't good for your mental health– who knew?

And he wants to pretend he became obsessed with you because of all those things, and of course they helped, but really, you had him at hello. Or well, you bothering to say hello and actually talk to him in the first place, to ask him questions about his life in moments of downtime where usually he’d be left with an unenthusiastic audience instead of a warm-hearted listener who actually laughed at his jokes.

So, of course, he has to go and fuck it up.

…

“So, glad that’s over, huh?” Wade says through a smile, the whites of his mask squeezing as his cheeks rise. “Speaking of over, you wanna come?”

“Over?” you shake your head a little, flashing your teeth as you try and comprehend him. “Right after we took on a whole crime ring?”

“Well, what a better time to unwind, am I right?”

“Oh?” you raise your eyebrows. “We’re unwinding?”

It’s small, but you swear Wade ups his talking speed, “Well, yeah, you know. Watch a movie, order in, show you my Pokemon cards, the works.”

You hum, pretending to consider it, “Depends, you got a holo Charizard?”

And now, for sure, he exhales his relief. “You insult me.”

The two of you enter his apartment not long after you’re dismissed from the mission, and Wade briefly excuses himself to change out of his suit. Making yourself at home, you take a seat on the couch and glance across his living room. His apartment is surprisingly nice. The kitchen and living room are one large, open space with a sleek, modern design. Also, you’d assume someone as chaotic as Wade would keep their house in a messier state, or hell, at least a little dusty, but the living room is spotless. Maybe he cleaned recently? What, was he planning on inviting someone over?

Snorting as you shake your head, a small click from across the hall catches your attention.

You’ve only seen Wade on the job, so naturally he’s always been wearing his red suit, but for some reason, you never stopped to picture him wearing civilian clothes. Actually, now that you’re seeing him in a sweatshirt and sweatpants – awfully warm for this weather – you’re struggling to reconcile the image of him you had in your head with the person right in front of you.

Well, at least until Wade brings up a fist to cover his mouth, illustrating his nervousness, and the tension fizzles out. Only Wade has body language that cartoonishly exaggerated.

“Nice sweats, green looks good on you.”

Wade pauses for a moment, registering your words before he giggles softly, arm falling to his side, “I’ve been thinking about changing the color of my suit. You know, hiding all the blood is great and all, but sometimes I gotta wonder – could this thing be more flattering?”

He walks over with a spring in his step before sitting by your side. Cutely, he wraps you up in the larger blanket first before settling the smaller, throw blanket over himself. You try your hardest not to show your confusion outwardly, but seeing Wade up close now has you questioning his outfit all the more.

He’s a bit tall, so the sweatpants don’t go all the way down to his ankles, but Wade’s wearing calf socks, as if he specifically were trying to avoid them being uncovered. Also, his hoodie’s easily a size or two larger, which makes it the perfect thing to wear to lounge around and watch a movie in, but also, the sleeves cover his entire hand sans his fingers. From the little you can see of them, they look puckered in scars.

But obviously Wade’s hands are scarred– he’s a mercenary. He’s handled all sorts of weapons and been in hundreds of fights over the years. You weren’t expecting his skin to be baby-smooth. 

What’s interesting to you is why he’d go through all the trouble to hide it.

Also, yeah, the most obvious pointers were that the hood of his sweatshirt is up even though you two are indoors in his own home and – how could you forget this one – his Deadpool mask is still on.

Was he just uncomfortable with sharing his identity in general or was he specifically trying to shove distance between the two of you? Whatever, if he doesn’t want to take his mask off with you, he doesn’t have to. You feel a distinct pang in your chest, but you try not to let it color how you respond to him. He’s more than in the right to only share what he feels most comfortable with.

Wade’s been fiddling with the remote while you’ve been – hopefully – subtly looking him over, and the screen finally changes from a streaming service page to the opening of the movie.

“We’re watching The Princess Bride? I didn’t take you for a romantic.”

He bats his eyes – at least, you think he does, given the mask– and speaks in a sweet voice “Why, me? Oh please, I know romance. I’m not going to invite a lovely, gorgeous, incredible person over and force them to watch Die Hard on the first–”

His back straightens out like he’s been electrocuted before he forcibly relaxes his posture to finish his thought.

“Hang-out.”

Okay, you want to go easy on him, especially because he seems so tense, but you can’t just let that one slide. You close the small distance remaining between the two of you, causing your entire side to press against his. Even through his sweatshirt, you can feel how warm he is.

“Mmm, just a hang out?” you mumble, sliding your head onto his shoulder. You’ve done this before, either for comedic effect or just in an attempt to push his buttons the same way he always tries to push yours – which, despite his best efforts, always ends up endearing him to you instead of bothering you – but never in a context like this.

He inhales sharply, and you count the seconds until he finally lets himself release it. Sometimes, you think he takes his healing factor for granted.

Turning his head to peer down at you, Wade considers you for a moment, keeping his face and body language deceptively neutral. You try your hardest to keep your eyes focused on the movie and your body loose and comfortable.

“You want this to be a date?” he says, flat.

“Why, thank you for asking, dear sir,” you copy his sweet voice from earlier before returning to your normal. “Yes, Wade, I like you.”

“I–” he starts, but the words get caught on their way out. His fingers bury themselves in the material of his sweatpants, and the movement draws your attention to them again. Shades of blotchy red and pink curve all across his skin.

Wade doesn’t say anything, which is concerning enough on its own, but following your confession, you feel like he’s more than out of his element. 

“That’s why you invited me over, right?” you try and help him out. “You feel the same, too.”

And then, feeling bold, you turn your head to face his still mask-covered head and kiss him lightly on the cheek. Instantly, you see fireworks go off inside him, because Wade hurriedly shuts the TV off and runs off to close the blinds. There’s barely enough light in the room now to make out shapes, but apparently Wade doesn’t take any issue because he peels his mask back and kisses you on the lips.

His lips are textured, and your intuition flashes quietly in the back of your mind, but for right now, you focus on how energetic he is. If his body is warm, his mouth feels like it’s on fire. He’s constantly moving, trying to experience all of you as fast as possible. 

It’s making your face heat up, how quickly he demands your complete attention and how relentless he is in grabbing it. Wade bites your bottom lip, causing you to gasp into him, and he uses the opportunity to explore across your own teeth and tongue. After a few more seconds, you break away, needing the space to breathe.

“Holy shit,” you whisper, voice rough.

“You’re telling me,” Wade coughs out. “We could’ve been doing that this whole time?”

“Well, all you had to do was ask.”

And although you can’t see him, which you know is the point, you understand something in him has shifted. He gets up from the couch, takes you by the hand, and leads you towards his room. His pace is so quick, you barely comprehend his actions until you’re both standing right in front of his bed.

“Is this okay?” he asks, quiet. You don’t think you’ve ever heard him stifle the amount of words he let loose before.

“Yes, of course it is. But Wade, we have to turn on at least a lamp or something in here.”

“We do?”

“Yeah,” you pause to give him a second to think. “I can’t see you at all like this.”

“What if – and you're just going to have to trust me on this one – you’d prefer it this way,” Wade’s voice is light, but it feels like it’s cracking at the edges.

“And why’s that?”

Not like you’d be able to see, but the anxiety radiating off of him makes him sound wide-eyed, “Huh? Oh, I– uh…”

“Look, if you’re worried about how I’m going to react to you having a bunch of scars– don’t. I don’t mind,” the sound of fabric rustling in front of you makes you think he just flinched. “I figured it out. You’re not sneaky.”

“You say that, but…”

“Wade, I don’t care. And I mean that kindly! Really, it doesn’t bother me.”

Wade starts pacing in front of you, nearly tripping on the leg of the bedpost, “Look, I appreciate the whole hero act you got going on here – really fits you good, you should totally quit your day job – but you don’t have to force yourself, I–”

“Wade, you either confront your insecurities head on or I’m not doing this with you. I told you what I think, the only person who’s going to worry about how you look here is you. We either have sex with a light on or not at all, okay?”

No one speaks for a few seconds once you finish saying your piece, and you cringe, realizing how forceful you must have come off. You’re about to speak up again to apologize when you hear a shudder-filled exhale from a few feet away.

“Jesus H. Christ,” he groans. “You’re so hot when you're putting people in their place.”

Your lips curl into a shaky smile, “Yeah, what else do you think is hot?”

And you can practically hear the gears turning in his head from here.

…

It’s actually happening. No fucking way he didn’t dream this up. But you were pretty adamant about him getting his head in the game in order for you guys to actually get down and dirty, so for you, he tries to keep his train of thought as focused as possible–  a big ask.

“Bossing anyone – everyone, especially me – around. You using your abilities–” you reach over and find Wade’s hand before running your fingers up his arm. “Shit, umm, using your abilities in general, but, umm, I really like when I’m there.”

“Oh?” you giggle. “When you get to watch, or?”

“When I get to feel.”

Your hand moves over to the nape of his neck, reaching under his hood and mask, to rub at his rough skin. Wade’s nerves light on fire as he waits for you to respond– for some reason, it never feels like your words come out fast enough.

“You got a thing for pain, Wilson?”

He chuckles, “You’d be surprised.”

“Okay, but are you sure? I can try, but it might not be all that good for you.”

“Don’t worry,” he thinks back to all those times he had a hard on while the two of you were fighting together. “It’ll be great for me.”

You hum, “Alright, then, but you tell me to stop the second you don’t like something, okay?”

“Aye, aye, captain,” he salutes, though you probably can’t see it. “And, same goes for you.”

“What a gentleman, letting me destroy him and giving me an out.”

He’s blushing something furious and he’s never been more grateful for the dark, “Anything for you.”

Those are the last words he whispers before he begins undressing. He knows you probably meant for him to strip with the light on, but he’s really not so sure he could stomach being looked at like a bug under a microscope. The attention, while electrifying, was already starting to get to him, so he lets himself stay in his comfort zone a little longer. As a treat. 

Once his sweats are off, he hesitantly peels off his mask before slipping into bed, keeping most of his body under the covers. After shutting his eyes, he clicks the lamplight on.

You’re not saying anything. That’s– a sign? A good one, a bad one, Wade doesn’t know. He’s trying so hard to keep his breathing steady, but he can feel his body start shaking all on its own.

You join him on the bed, kneeling next to him, before your warm breath falls across his cheeks as you kiss his forehead. Only then does he open his eyes, and you reward him by cupping his cheek in your hand.

“There,” you say. “Wasn’t so hard, was it?”

Wade gets the strong urge to snort, and so he does, but your eyes narrow. There’s a soft scratching at the back of his skull as you snake your hand over, and quickly you dig your nails in slightly. Wade has to bite his tongue to keep the noise in.

“I’m sorry, is that funny to you?”

“No!” he whispers sharply as you bring your hand down to scratch along the line of his neck.

“Good, seems like you’re learning.”

You kiss him, teeth clacking together at first before Wade melts into it. Your hand is still slowly exploring his body, running along the line of his shoulder and towards his upper arm. When you reach his bicep, you very obviously squeeze the muscle there, and you let out a pleased sigh as you begin groping in earnest.

He wants to turn to hide his face in the pillow, not sure how to react to all the positive attention and appreciation, but you catch him trying to turn away, and you kiss him deeper.

While one hand begins to explore his pecs and abs, your other hand scratches down his v-line, softly caressing the skin of his inner thighs before moving around to squeeze his ass.

Wade rewards you with a small whine, and you carefully trail a finger down his dick. You move in to whisper in his ear, “You’re so hot, I’m not forgiving you for hiding for so long.”

Trying to stifle the embarrassing moan that he knows will come out, he bites down on his lip hard, but you take the hand not teasing his cock to gently pry his lip away.

“From now on, I get to hear you, okay?” you say and Wade nods rapidly.

You take the moment you wrap your hand around the base of his cock, and after giving him a second to ready himself, you ask, “I’m going to use it now. Tell me if you want to stop.”

“Okay–” he responds before he feels the sweet sensation of you jerking him off coupled with your power. It’s a humming, dull feeling of pain resting in the background– almost like the sensation of being choked except it’s affecting his entire body. Wade feels like there’s a weight pinning down each of his limbs and it’s so freeing– so relaxing.

He sighs and turns his head to the side, letting out a deep moan when you up the pace of your hand and bring the other to fondle his balls.

“How is it?” you ask, sweat dripping down your brow at trying to control your ability. Sure, it’s  powerful and at times pretty horrifying, but Wade always loved how he was essentially immune. At the same rate you could destroy the flesh around you, he could heal his own right back. Just knowing that made him feel good, somehow, like he was made perfectly for you.

“It’s good– so good, I–” he nearly shouts, forgetting about the neighbors.

“Yeah, baby? What do you need?”

At hearing the pet name, he straight up whines as he tries to bury his hands in the sheets instead of his own thighs. 

“Not sure, umm, a little more–”

And he doesn’t know which god he has to thank for putting you on this planet, but he’s willing to pay them all a visit. You read him like he’s not some mess, some walking disaster nobody bothers paying attention to, and you give him what you know he needs.

From the base of his chin, you drag your hand in a deep scratch across his neck, chest, and stomach, your eyes watching the pink lines blend in with his scarred skin. It’s a flashing pain, sharp like being scalded and it feels so good mixed with the blunt feel of being under your power.

“I’m gonna–” he says, and of course, you seem to already know. He cums with a deep grunt, rutting his hips into your fist before he thrusts his head forward to kiss you again.

As soon as he comes down, he pulls away only slightly, just so he can say what he’s been wanting to say since he met you.

“Thank–”

You cut him off with another kiss, because sometimes, he really does need to shut up. 

[tarotofbadkitties]

The reason the hotel scene is so weird is Patrick. Fresh off starting a fight with him for no reason, Art's coming in hot. He's both guilty because he was such a dick, and also pumped with adrenaline cause being mean is a rush for people who are never mean. When he tells Tashi he has something to say to her that's going to make her mad, his body is tense and his hands are twitching. Art's ready to have that fight about his retirement.

What Art doesn't know, is that she and Patrick already had the fight they should be having in this moment. She should be pissed because they've been doing this together and now he wants to quit on her, but her affects all wrong; she's as placid as a lake. Her energy is making him anxious, suspicious, and you can see his brain going a mile a minute. Just like a partner having a sexual affair isn't horny when you expect them to be because they gave their lust to someone else, a partner having an emotional one can be too calm when you expect them to be fired up. Patrick gave him some pushback, but he had the big fight about being abandoned in favor of the saddest marriage in the world with Tashi and was ready to reconcile. Unlike Tashi, who liked to meditate and be chill before a match, Art's looking for a fight ahead of his match in the morning.

The problem is, neither of his people are down for that, and he can't put his finger on why. With that plan foiled, he switches gears to sexy mode. While he's working his way into the zone, slowly kissing his way around Tashi's body, she's damn near ready to combust. At this point, he can try to catch up and satisfy her OR he can leave her sexually unsatisfied the same way she left him emotionally unsatisfied. What wins this battle is passively giving her permission to sneak out while he pretends to be asleep. If she wants to fight with Patrick then she can go fuck him too.

[satansamwriting]

Mk characters reacting to their GN s/o wearing their hats

0o0o0o0o0o0o

Characters : Erron Black, Kung Lao, Raiden

I wrote this because whenever I play MK, I would always wonder what it would be like to wear the hats of those boys.

Mostly because of Kung Lao since I absolutely adore seeing him fight with his hat. It's so funny and cool and I really wanna try it.

Hopefully you'll enjoy those silly little Headcanons. I had a blast writing them. Oh and if you want, tell me in the comment which hat would you be tempted to try/steal the most out of the three? I'm curious :)

Also I discovered while writing those that I had a thing for throwing hats in the air. Don't know why, I just think it looks cool xD.

As usual disclaimer: English ain't my native language so there might be mistakes in this. I'm trying my best to correct them as I see them.

TW : mention of death, blood and decapitation in Erron story

Please enjoy 😊

Erron Black

Something that was established during the early days of your relationship was that Erron loves his hat.

No one is allowed to touch, wear or even go near his hat.

Will rarely take it off.

Would shoot anyone who dares take the hat.

Would take immense care of it.

You wondered what it would feel like to wear it but feared the wraith of your partner.

However, the hat is free real estate if you find it on the ground during battle and the cowboy is too far away from it and distracted.

Then you wouldn’t hesitate to put it on.

You would feel pretty badass with it.

Now entering shitty cowboy jokes mode

You'd try your best and fail miserably to do a cowboy accent. 

Erron would never admit it but it would become his favourite thing, seeing you with his hat. 

0o0o0o

Screams of agony and rage echoed around the arena. An uprising caused by some rebels not happy with Kotal Kahn being in power was taking place. The Kahn, having safely left the vicinity, entrusted his most brave and fearsome soldiers to fend off the remaining troublemakers. Aka, (Y/n) and Erron, accompanied by a small group of Outworld soldiers, stayed behind to clean the arena. The fight had proven to be somewhat more difficult then they had previously anticipated. Somewhere during the battle, someone managed to knock Erron's hat off. He wasn't bothered by it at the time as he was more focused on winning the kombat and staying alive. However, once his enemy was defeated, he quickly noticed the missing item.

Erron, slightly annoyed by this, scanned the arena but couldn’t find his hat. Not until his eyes landed on his partner.

They were further away from him, fighting against their own opponent. The dust flying around made it hard to see clearly but he knew from the shape of it that, resting on their head, was his hat.

To say that Erron found the sight of them punching a man while wearing the item incredibly hot, was an understatement.

As the rebellion died down, Erron allowed himself to be distracted by their fight. He watched from the sideline as (Y/n) grabbed the hat and threw it above them.

The action drew the attention of the man they were fighting against upwards, his eyes unconsciously following the hat trajectory. Taking the opportunity, they sliced the distracted man's head off. Blood splattered on their face but that didn't seem to bother them.

As the man lay dead, they caught the falling hat and in a smooth gesture placed it back on their head. In the distance, noises of spurs approaching made them turn to the side, tilting the hat toward Erron.

"Howdy partner"

Seeing the giant grin on (Y/n)'s face made the gunslinger's heart skip a beat. Splashes of blood covered their face but his hat had remained spotless. Even when fighting, they took great care not to let the hat get dirty. Behind them, the last rebel died, earning various cries of triumph from the soldiers of the Kahn all around. Erron kept staring at his partner, still not processing how gorgeous they were with his hat on. As they were about to remove the hat to return it to its original owner, a hand stopped them.

"Keep it"

Erron would never admit it out loud that he enjoyed seeing (Y/n) with the headwear. Besides, he had plenty of spared ones. One less wouldn't hurt.

“Much obliged darlin’ ”

Groaning with their attempt at sounding like a cowboy, Erron walked away. He could still hear (Y/n) laughing as they followed behind.

Kung Lao

0o0o0o00oo

You won’t see him without it

Unless it’s to shower or sleep

Takes great care of his hat since well it’s his weapon.

Would feel hesitant to let you touch it after he’s sharpened the edge.

You absolutely love to see him fight with it cuz you find him both attractive and badass while he does

You do express the desire to try it but never get around to trying it

Blame Raiden for always taking your boy out for training or missions

You happened to stumble upon the hat one day at the temple with Kung Lao nowhere to be seen.

You wouldn’t skip a beat before taking hold of the weapon and putting it on.

Liu Kang would find you later and the two of you would start training.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Kung Lao leaned on one of the temple support beams, arms crossed over his chest. From afar, he watched as his partner blocked one of Liu Kang’s flaming fits with his hat.

Earlier that day, Kung Lao had been meditating peacefully with his trusted hat placed beside him, when one of the elderly monks came to him for help. Thinking it would only take a few minutes, Kung Lao had left his hat in its spot and followed the other monk.

The errant took longer than he had anticipated but was done fairly quickly nonetheless. However, once he came back to his meditation place, the hat was gone. Puzzled, he had searched the surrounding area to no avail. Sure, the shaolin monk could have summoned his weapon back to him no problem, but a small voice inside him told him to keep looking around.

He had been near the training ground when he heard the telltale sound of his hat hitting the ground. Because yes this man can recognize the sound of his weapon hitting things.

The sight that welcomed him inside the area almost made him laugh. He wasn’t surprised to see (Y/n) wearing his hat, since he knew fully well about their desire to try the weapon.

Quietly observing the friendly match, Kung Lao was rather impressed. (Y/n) seemed fairly comfortable with his weapon, even imitating some of his own moves flawlessly. A soft smile appeared on Kung Lao's face at the thought of them studying him carefully whenever they would come to watch him train.

Raiden stopped by after a while. Arms crossed behind his back, the Thunder God joined Kung Lao in observing the match.

The Shaolin monk felt a sense of proudness inside him. His partner was wielding his weapon and keeping up with the chosen one. The sight was truly beautiful.

Unaware of the two spectators in the back, (Y/n) had their full attention on Liu Kang, dodging his attacks one after the other.

Wanting to try something crazy, they threw the hat up in the air before sliding underneath Liu Kang's parted legs. Upon straightening up behind the chosen one, their foot connected with the falling hat. Liu Kang barely managed to avoid the weapon as it flew past him and lodge itself in the temple’s wall.

The man turned to face (Y/n), surprised yet amused by the event. There, on Liu Kang’s shoulder, was a small cut left by the hat as it went by him. Which only meant one thing.

“First person to leave a mark on the other is the winner, so this means I won” They exclaimed with a giant smile on their face.

At that moment, Kung Lao made his presence known by clapping. Summoning his hat back to him, he walked toward his partner, Raiden not far behind. Fondness in his eyes, he picked them up and kissed their forehead as a reward.

" You were amazing!"

Lets just say that from then on, Kung Lao would let (Y/n) train with his hat just so he could enjoy watching them kick ass with it.

Raiden

0o0o0o0o

It's more of a fashion accessory than a necessity

Like Erron and Kung Lao, he would rarely remove it tho

Heck, you don’t even think you’ve seen Raiden’s hair once in the long time you’ve known him.

But if you had to guess, they would be white like his brother.

Or he was simply bald.

The idea of stealing the God's hat did pop up in your head more than once

But the thought of pissing off a God for stealing his shit didn’t sound good in your mind.

So you left it to that.

Raiden would sometimes catch you glancing up at his hat and wondered about the meaning of this.

You'd pretty much given up about the hat.

Until the day the hat literally landed in your hand.

It was a particularly windy day at the temple. As (Y/n) roamed around the place without anything better to do, they sighted something strange flying in the wind. Curious about the object, (Y/n) followed it until it was low enough for them to grab it.

Upon closer inspection, the object revealed itself to be a hat. A hat that they knew very well. But the God of Thunder was nowhere to be seen.

“Don’t worry little hat, I’ll bring you back to your owner”

Putting the hat on their head, (Y/n) went on a quest to find Lord Raiden and return the lost item. At least, that’s what they had in mind at first. However, they found themselves quickly distracted from the task as they wandered around the temple.

Somewhere during their search, a monk approached them asking for help to move stuff from one place to another. Being the kindred heart that they were, (Y/n) agreed to help the monk. After a while, they were finally done with the task and went back to their search, the monk thanking them as they left.

This went on and off during the day, with monks asking for help or errants and (Y/n) agreeing. To a point where they had completely forgotten about the hat sitting on their head.

Evening rolled around eventually. Exhausted from their day, (Y/n) found themselves sitting in an isolated part of the temple while nursing a cup of green tea. The wind had settled into a nice breeze which gently brushed against them.

“Good evening (Y/n)”

Looking to the side, their eyes fell on a rare sight. Approaching them was Lord Raiden.There was an air of calmness around the God as he came to an alt next to them. Hands behind his back, he titled his head slightly, making a few strands of hair come loose from the quickly made ponytail. (Y/n) stared, feeling their heartbeat quicken. They could see Raiden's hair and as they had guessed, his hair was indeed white but shorter than they had thought it would be.

Noticing their lack of response, (Y/n) cleared their throat as a way to hide their embarrassment from staring a bit too long. Carefully placing the cup to the side, they stood.

“Thunderbolt, I was looking for you earlier! But it appeared that I got sidetracked and forgot about it.”

Seeing their partner had reminded them of their initial quest.

“ I appeared to have found your hat and wished to return it to you.”

(Y/n) gently took off the item and handed it to Raiden. They had grown somewhat accustomed to the weight of the hat over the hours. So much so that, now with the item gone, they felt weirdly naked.

“It would seem you have taken a liking to it. It suits you well.”

Taking the offered hat in his hand, Raiden thanked his partner for keeping the object safe until it was returned to him. However, the God seemed to hesitate for a moment, his fingers fidgeting with the helm of the hat.

"Perhaps you should keep an eye on it for a little longer."

Raiden lifted the hat and gently placed it back upon (Y/n) head. Satisfied, the God of Thunder walked away. Raiden would later deny it to his brother that the mere sight of them wearing his hat made his heart beat faster.

Standing there, the tea long forgotten, (Y/n) watched as Raiden turned the corner. Did he just flirted with them? Touching the hat as if to make sure this wasn't all a dream, they laughed. Who were they to refuse a gift from a God.

//////

Later that night, they would force Raiden to lay down, his head on their laps, so they could marvel and play with his hair.

[lazybutsmexy]

ghost x reader x soap with a reader who is a military k9 handler 👀👀

yes yes yes YES YES

the moment they saw you walk in with your dog they were hooked

dog is a belgian malonois, lets call her Dolly

look at her, what a bby

Soap knows how crazy difficult that breed can be, so knowing that you are her handler just makes him internally swoon

secretly finds it hot that Dolly follows your every command and how in synch the both of you are navigating obstacles in training or in battle

(a little part of his brain swears he could be just as good following commands for you *wink wink*)

Dolly falls in love with Ghost, hands down

no one knows how or why

everyone's confused, you're the most confused

(he was saving her meat scraps from his meals and sneaking them to her)

when you found out you scolded him up and down and told him not to do that

he was 1: shocked that you were scolding him given the fact he outranked you and 2: kinda sad he wasn't allowed to give Dolly more treats

Anyway

Both Ghost and Soap want to get closer to you but weren't exactly sure how to do that??

they share a braincell, your honor

they came up with the idea to offer themselves for takedown practice

was that smart? yes and no

yes: they spent a lot of time with you and Dolly, everyone else could see that there was a bond of some sort blossoming between the three (four) of you

no: Dolly is a menace, and she bites fucking hard

Soap was very confident squaring up to Dolly while wearing the protective glove

up until the moment Dolly chomped down on the glove and he swore he felt the tips of her canines stretch the inner layer

Ghost didn't believe him until it was his turn, and he felt it too

as they watched Dolly wind down from attack mode into semi-normal dog mode the moment you gave her a toy, they respected you even more

they both realize that the closest way to your heart was to gain Dolly's heart

suddenly, Dolly found so many toys whenever you weren't looking

you know it was their doing, because Dolly seemed to like them even more than before

they were more or less subtle, she was not lol

aside from takedown training, you teach them to give her basic commands

Ghost loves to have her climb onto his shoulders

Soap somehow manages to make her bark "I love you"

you only cry a little bit

Soap has to get used to Dolly giving him kisses

he hasn't had a lot of good experiences with dogs, so you and Ghost have to coach him into it

he does offer to go on morning runs with Dolly so you get another hour of sleep

that's how they bond

Ghost is the ultimate Dog Dad™

at home and during down time, he gives Dolly uppies like a toddler, holding her with one arm under her hind legs while her front legs hold onto his shoulders

she looks like a toddler and she's elated to be so tall

he sometimes also holds her like a baby, with her paws up

you used to do that when she was a puppy so she gets flashbacks and whines

cue all the doggy kisses

big cuddle piles between all of you

Dolly always sleeps at your feet, on the field she sleeps helf on top of your torso

one night Soap tried to sneak a cuddle while sleeping on the floor of a safehouse and ended up cuddling Dolly

she was confused but let him anyway

Ghost took photos for blackmail

when you're all at home - usually yours - she sleeps stretched over all three pairs of feet

unless y'all want more privacy then to the kennel she goes

she's offended every time and will bite holes into Soap and Ghost's socks in revenge

[starsurface]

Hi can I request caregiver kenshi and Johnny taking care of a sick little Tomas plz I loved that valentine’s Day fanfic with them a lot I’m also the one who requested part 2 of that fic 😊you don’t have to if you don’t want to I know you already have a lot of requests also don’t forget to take care of yourself 😁

Oh my gosh this was you?? I loved writing that piece!!! It was so fun!! :D

And please, make as many as you want!! I'll get to them all eventually . . . one day. <3

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

CG Kenshi & Johnny w/ Sick Regressor Tomas Hcs

❤️ Sickness, everyone’s worst enemy’s >:(

⭐ Actually, out of the three of them, Tomas is the least likely to get sick!!

💨 He grew up in the Lin Kuei, a very, very, cold environment, and also trained with Kuai Liang, which constantly had his system in battle mode growing up

❤️ But it doesn’t make him immune!!

⭐ The only ‘problem’ is how sick Tomas acts 😮‍💨

💨 Johnny’s whiney, Kenshi’s clingy, but Tomas? Complete ‘independence’! He can get his own medicine! And do his laundry, or make his own meals, he’ll be just fine!

❤️ ^ Spoiler alert, most times he can’t, and especially little sick Tomas can’t, but it won’t stop him from trying-

⭐ But oh no, not under Johnny’s roof, there’s no way that Tomas will even lift a FINGER while he’s sick! >:(

💨 It’s half being sick, and half the constant babying that Kenshi and Johnny give him, that make him feel tiny

❤️ Sometimes it’s bad enough to regress to babyspace, other times it’s toddlerspace

⭐ Either way, this man is BRATTY

💨 Most times it’s not his fault!! He feels really icky, and if they just let him get up, he could grab the right bottle/sippy cup instead of having to hide his face every time they brought him the WRONG thing!!

❤️ No screaming or throwing, but a lot of hiding, huffing, and tucking himself away from whatever they try to give him

⭐ In between the mix of wanting to be swadddled, and everythings too hot to wear right now

💨And whose fault is it? Kenshi and Johnny, obviously!! >:(

❤️ . . . Well, not really, but it is! It totally is! Why would Kenshi try to swaddle him when it’s 100 degrees in here? Why would he not swaddle him when it’s so cold?!

⭐ As much as Kenshi and Johnny love him, it can get a bit (lot) frustrating

💨 ^ Especially if Tomas is borderline nonverbal, normally they can get what he wants but Tomas is refusing any kind of communication and it’s really hard

❤️ Kenshi, as much as he loves Tomas, does get irritated quickly, and decides it’s time for Tomas to take a small nap to feel better

⭐ And Johnny, as much as he loves dotting on his baby, is also a bit exhausted from running around trying to make Tomas happy

💨 It does make Tomas sad, especially because he knows he’s being a bit frustrating to deal with, and him deciding everything was wrong might not be the best thing to do

❤️ After a small (desperately needed) nap, he quietly asks if he can snuggle with them and watch tv

⭐ He still feels icky, and upset over how he’s acted, but Johnny and Kenshi do understand it’s never fun being sick

💨 This time they try a slightly different approach, like Johnny carrying Tomas to the kitchen to choose his bottle/sippy instead of just running back and forth

❤️ And Kenshi swaddling Tomas with the air conditioner on and a ice pack on stand by (and a trash can, it’s never the best to have dairy while sick . . . or Oreos, Johnny fell into the puppy eyes trick . . again)

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Ngl, I actually get so scared writing Tomas sometimes. :( 

Like, someone got really pissy at me for babying him (and I do think the fandom Infantilizes him, Raiden, and Syzoth a lot) but like . . . it was a babyspace request . . .

I think it’s why I try to make him a little menace, so that I don’t baby baby him, because I did see their side, they were just being really mean about it :/

[hell-drabbles]

Ra-on 3

Summary: You and Ra-on do your morning routine of having breakfast together. The topic, for whatever reason, lands on the topic of Satan.

(This Ra-on is in that part of character development where he's starting to get better and his kindness is no longer focused on people he's found hot. This is also a few or so days right before the Embittered Companion goes missing, because I'm cruel and I want everyone to suffer and get worse before getting better.)

There’s this routine you and Ra-on have that has far went unbroken. Early in the morning, when the demons are still sleeping away and the battles have lulled to a manageable low, you and Ra-on would drift into the kitchen to either cook or just make a nice morning drink.

You can’t really pinpoint why you do any of this. Perhaps it’s just something you both find comfort in, in doing a rather mundane routine to offset the lunacy that comes with adjusting to Hell? Or perhaps you’re both missing the cool mornings were your bodies were barely shifting out of dreaming mode, where you’d both shuffle into the kitchen and hear the sound of oil on a hot pan, where you’d both settle down and be greeted by the freshly dressed and smiling Minhyeok right before he goes on his jog.

Well, whatever the reason, this was something you take enjoyment in for the fact that the devils weren’t here. Your blood pressure can be normal, for just a little bit. You can joke around and be a little mean without a devil coming right over and egging you into a fight or an argument, hoping to distract you long enough to whisk Ra-on away.

“Is that what you’re judging me for?” Ra-on looked exasperated, frowning as he lifted his mug to his lips, “For… messing around?”

Ha. Messing around. He likes being called a dirty whore and yet can’t say the word ‘fuck.’

“Nah, I’m judging you for the fact that you’re fucking someone that looks like the janitor from our high school.” You’re not going to stop him, honestly. If he’s having fun and his partners are having fun, then that’s fine. You just can’t help but point out this… pattern in his tastes.

Ra-on spat out his coffee, dribbling over his chin and absolutely soaking his shirt. He cough and sputtered.

“He–” Ra-on coughs again, “He does not!”

“Yeah you’re right,” you leaned back, grinning, “that janitor was hotter. ‘There’s something nice about a body that’s been built from years of hard labor rather than just for the sake of it,’ was what you said, right?”

“Stop!” Ra-on slammed his head on the table. You can practically see steam rising from his ears, “That was ages ago! Just let me live!”

You’re lying, you actually don’t remember what that janitor man looked like beyond the white hair, but you remember very distinctly that Ra-on had a huge crush on him way up until the last year of high school. By then he moved on and was hungry for a teacher that you also don’t remember. And then you all went to university and it was basically a game of hot potato with Ra-on. New crush, new wet dreams, new feelings all the time.

It was fun and funny. It was also tiring.

You will never let Ra-on live any of this down, not while you still had blood pumping into your veins. He makes this way too fun.

[nuttytani]

childe demisexual agenda.

Just a personal hc and unorganised thoughts. Basically a rambling. Obviously some zhongchili on the side because.... I mean...I am a shipper ;-; (lol you thought this would be just about childe? oops xD).

So, hear me out. Childe was 14 when he fell into the abyss and was sent to the fatui. He was still in his teen years, a crucial time to develop close bonds with people and feel attraction for peers.

He never had the chance to experience what any other teenager would feel. Childe was too busy surviving in the abyss, learning about weapons and back in the surface, he was yet again, sent to the fatui. Where he had to rise from the bottom and show people what he was capable of.

He was in survival mode. Everytime, 24/7. He couldn't trust anyone, he couldn't befriend anyone, let alone romance. Instead, he kept improving his skills, engaging in countless battles. I know we love to say that he is battlesexual (me too ngl, my unhinged ginger man).

And that the boy has nothing in his mind except for battle and his love for his family. Maybe, that's just a coping mechanism? To keep his mind occupied and not think about anything else and maybe it's because that's all he knows? (ok we're getting off topic lol)

Anyways, the relationship he has with zhongli is different from any other he has ever had. Zhongli was his true first friend and first love. He never experienced anything like this in his life before he met zhongli. He didn't really have the time either.

It's not like childe didn't listen in on his fellow fatui comrades gossiping and discussing about each other's love life, he did. But he could never relate, and he was never interested. And now, his inexperience in love and anything sexual is all catching up.

Why does he feel so strange whenever he's around zhongli? Why does he feel so hot and bothered whenever he sees zhongli smile at him or touch his hand.

Now that he's feeling.... Many feelings, he doesn't even have anyone to get advice. Who will he speak to? His family that outcasts him? His colleagues who are scared of him? The Liyue natives who probably hate his presence? He doesn't have anyone. And that's actually really sad.

It's really tragic that zhongli was and IS his only trusted friend. And it makes his betrayal in the Northland bank even more heartbreaking. Because now, he has no one. Back to square 1. The relationship he thought he had with zhongli was fake, everything was fake.

But anyways. Yeah. Uhh… Demisexual childe. This really went off topic. Oops. But what I'm trying to say is, due to his lack of experience with true relationships (whether romantic, platonic or sexual), he gives demi vibes. Like, look at him????

I know that the genshin community loves to pin him as a fuckboy, but really— look at him. Does he look like this boy has any sexual thoughts? Does he ???? He is head empty only family and battle.

I'm sorry this was just a self indulgent, fujoshi tinted, zhongchili influenced, childe simp influenced post with no head nor tail. Peace out.

[pancake-blogging]

So the other day, I added onto a post from @too-many-blorbos and mentioned how I thought Robots in Disguise would've been improved if it were a sequel to Rescue Bots instead of Prime. Now over here, I'm gonna expand that with the other things I would change! Also, I thought it'd be fun to call this au/rewrite/whatever Rescue Bots in Disguise, or RBiD

Putting it under a read more, because it's probably gonna be... A lot.

The first change is the starting cast. As I established in the other post, we'll be replacing Bumblebee with Chase but keep Strongarm. Then, we replaced Sideswipe with Hot Rod (don't worry tho, Sideswipe will show up later with Sunstreaker in tow)

The show starts with Chase and Strongarm patrolling on Cybertron. Chase is trying to explain to Strongarm why they don't need to be concerned with one bot loitering in a public space, only for a speeding Hot Rod to rocket past them. The two pursue him, eventually catching up with him next to a Space Bridge.

Hot Rod is perplexed when told he was speeding to get here, and as Chase tries to ask if he's okay his hand brushes against the controls. The Space Bridge suddenly activates, and all three of them are pulled through to Earth.

On Earth, I've decided it would be more interesting to replace the human characters with a grown-up Raf who has a kid of his own (because I miss my boy and I want him to be there).

And while Grimlock was one of the better parts of RiD, I still feel like he isn't quite Grimlock-y enough. So, I decided to swap him out with a new Dinobot based off Spike from the movies; all you need to do is take Grimlock's Dino mode head and make his snout narrower and longer, add a sail to his back, and bam! You have a spinosaurus that's still just as intimidating as a T-Rex, while leaving the door open for a more traditional Grimlock to show up later.

One of the main plot points of the first season is that Megatronus returns with a plan to destroy both Earth and Cybertron, hence why the Primes saw fit to revive Optimus. In RBiD, however, Optimus won't be revived.

In every episode, Hot Rod will have at least one very brief encounter with a past Prime; they might be right next to/replacing his reflection in a piece of glass, he might see them standing opposite him at base only to vanish when another bot passes in front of them, or maybe he hears their voice telling him to duck in the middle of a battle.

Halfway through the season, Windblade shows up; still acting as an agent of Primus, her role in RBiD is still to help out the team, but now her primary mission is also to help Hot Rod establish a connection with the Primes. With her help, Hot Rod is finally able to have a full conversation with a still dead Optimus Prime, who reveals that he and the other past Primes have sensed an approaching darkness. He also reveals that Hot Rod was chosen to take up the mantle of Prime when the time is right – though Optimus fears they may not have the luxury of time.

As for the Decepticons... It is very strange that virtually EVERY SINGLE ONE is partially (if not mostly) animal-like, while there are (to my memory) ZERO animal-like Autobots. That's sending a weird message. So! Some of the Decepticons will have slight redesigns to be just normal humanoid robots, though exceptions can be made for ones with bestial alt-modes or when their animal-like features have a clear translation into their alt-mode, like Thunderhoof's antlers. Steeljaw is supposed to be a wolf in sheep's clothing, but since it's kinda strange that a half wolf man turns into an SUV I've decided to just make him a beastformer that turns into a wolf.

Also! Some of the prisoners aboard the ship should've been Autobots. And I don't just mean former Autobots, I mean Autobots that broke the rules but would still refuse to join the Decepticons.

At the end of the first season, when Megatronus breaks free, Optimus and the other Primes channel themselves through Hot Rod and temporarily transform him into Rodimus Prime. Shortly after Megatronus is defeated, however, he reverts back to a HEAVILY exhausted Hot Rod – another character (probably Windblade) points out that had he contained the raw power of the Primes in his body for too much longer, he might have died. The rest of the series, he's dedicated to honing himself, occasionally getting the odd power boost until the series finale, where he's finally able to become Rodimus Prime permanently.

[dustydoop]

HeyHeyheyhey

Idk if this is allowed but:

Opinions of a HC abt Scout being a stubborn Bastard when sick and will keep going until he faints/passes out?

Well, I guess you could say I liked this idea cause I kinda wrote a little thing.

Aggressive ringing came from Scout’s nightstand, was it morning already? Scout laid it bed, letting it ring for a while before mustering up the strength to shut it off. As an arm reached out from under the blanket, Scout shivered. 

With his blanket still wrapped around him, he pounded on Soldier’s door next to his room. “Hey man, did you do something last night, it’s freezing up in here!” He shouted, why did that knock out his breath? 

Soldier opened the door, still in his nightwear. “I did no such thing, Scout. I was, in fact, not here at all.” 

Scout raised an eyebrow at him. “Then where wer- Never mind, I don’t even want to know.” He muttered as he stumbled back to his room, nearly falling over as he did so. Scout dropped the blanket, facing the mysterious chill. Maybe he just needed to freshen up. 

Nope. 

Not even the boiling hot shower got rid of the overall sense of grime Scout felt all over. He glanced at the clock, he really should be going out to the community kitchen for breakfast by this point. 

He walked out of the hallway of rooms, still weak in the legs, and entered the loud kitchen. Immediately, the smell of coffee and whatever Engineer was cooking on the stovetop hit Scout. 

“HURAG-” 

The eight mercenaries in the kitchen stopped in their tracks and whipped around to see what made that noise. Scout snapped up straight as their eyes locked on him. “Hey… Fellas? Lovely weather we’re having,” He said with a fake chuckle after swallowing the gag he felt in the back of his throat. 

Scout lowered his baseball hat in an attempt to avoid eye contact as he walked to his usual spot next to Sniper. Sniper gave him a concerned look as he drank his coffee, but kept to himself for the time being. 

“Hey, kid, how are ya?” Engineer slapped Scout on the shoulder, “You want any of this? I made extra just in case.” He gestured to the skillet he was using. 

Now, typically, Scout was never one to pass up on Engineer’s cooking. Heck, he wasn’t one to pass up on any sort of free food, but a home cooked meal from such a good cook? He’d have to be either crazy or sick to sick to say no. 

Unfortunately, he was definitely either of those. “It looks great, Engie, really it does, but I- I just can’t right now…” Scout trailed off. 

Sniper cocked an eyebrow at him. “You alright, mate? You look awful.” 

“Hey!” Scout snapped back, “Like you got any right to insult me, Snipes.”

Engineer sighed. “I hate to say it, but Mick’s right, boy. You look a whole lot paler than usual and you’ve been shivering this whole time.”

“Well if someone didn’t turn up the air conditioning, maybe I wouldn’t be like this!” Scout said, desperate for an excuse. 

Engineer went to the nearest thermostat. “Sorry, kid, it's around 75 degrees, it definitely ain’t cold. C’mere,” He said as he put the back of his hand to Scout’s forehead. “Woah Nelly! You’re burning up, kid. You need to take the day off, rest up.” 

Scout slapped Engineer’s hand away from his face. “I don’t need to rest up, and I don’t need you going all mom mode on me, I’m like 27 for crying out loud. I ain’t taking the day off.” 

“You sure that’s a good idea?” Sniper asked, “I’d take a break if I was you.” “Well, you ain’t me. Listen, if it gets any worse, I’ll just have Doc gimme a little of that magic crap from his healing doodad, alright?” 

Medic swung around from his conversation with Heavy. “Ack, no can do! The medigun only works on injuries, not diseases.” He said, of course he was eavesdropping. 

“Well fine then!” Scout said as he stood up far too fast, “I’ll just go on with my day like always, I’m fine!” He marched out of the kitchen to prepare for the day’s work. 

A couple hours later, the whole team was ready for battle as soon as the doors opened. Scout’s head pounded as the metal room reverberated with shouts of the other mercs messing around before battle. 

Slowly, the doors opened, alleviating the echo and giving Scout some much needed fresh air. However, fresh air could only do so much against illness. 

He ran, just like he always did. Easy enough, right? Even with his calves feeling like jelly, his legs ready to give in beneath his weight. Blurs of structures and team mates flew past, made worse by his watery vision. Gosh, he just needed to shake whatever this was, he had a job to do. 

Soon enough, he found a corner to catch his breath in. He knew the strategy the team had agreed on that time, he just needed to run in, start shooting when he got the signal from Engie, and then run off to where phase two started. Nothing too complicated. 

“Just run to the point,

My head might explode.

Just run to the point,

Did I just trip on nothing?

Just run to the point,

It’s so cold out here. 

Just run to the point, 

I can barely brea-”

Everything went black. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Spy snuck around the back of the battlefield, preparing his disguise. He opened his kit to grab a mask, but something caught his eye before he could put it on. 

Scout was running to the point, as he should, but goodness was his form horrible. Yes, Spy was never one to compliment Scout, but at least he recognized that he was a decent runner. However, this was just awful. He was breathing out of his mouth like an inbred pug, swerving more than the one time Demo got a hold of the company van and his arms drooped at his sides. Spy even caught him tripping on nothing! 

Something wasn’t right. 

Spy peered around the corner, curious about what would happen. Scout took a few steps into the clearing, right in front of BLU team and collapsed. He would get back up, right? He was just being stupid, clumsy Scout again. 

Spy waited a second for him to pop back up, but he never did. In a flash, he remembered the conversation Scout had with Sniper and Engineer that morning. Maybe he truly was unconscious. Without thinking, Spy ran out to where Scout was, sprawled across the dirt path. 

“Get back! Get back, you cowards!” Spy snarled as he rushed out into the open, aiming his revolver at the line of enemy mercs. All of the mercenaries on the field stopped what they were doing, Spy was never in the middle of the battlefield, much less to help Scout. 

Spy took a few deep breaths before grabbing Scout and slinging him over his shoulder, revolver still outstretched. He backed up against a wall and made his way back to base. Once there, he placed Scout down on a spare cot and gave him the first blanket he saw. 

He reapproached his team, now reconvening to go over plan B. “Gentlemen, we never speak of this again, agreed?”

[zy-murge]

give me your doc headcanons immediately + thoughts on the fact that doc was in on the betrayal at the end of M:PN (he provided the rocket launcher)

okay focusing on the betrayal part first I was gonna be like "he definitely would not ask Hank to try and kill Sanford & Deimos?" and I completely stand by that. But I also forgot Jeb was there too. Doc would ABSOLUTELY tell Hank to launch Jeb's ass off that fucking tower I KNOW he's petty like that even if he doesn't show it.

Doc and Jeb's relationship I think is constantly a petty battle to show which is better. I think Jeb does this by trying to act like he's "above" everything Doc is doing, (attempting in) showing that he has more grace than to send his goons to do his dirty work (<- hypocrite, has already done so with sheriff & hofnarr) and participate in such vile experiments like what doc's doing for revival (<- STILL a hypocrite. while always against reviving people he like, still made some pretty heinous shit like the sleepwalker program.) Doc on the other hand knows Jeb is doing this all to get a step up on him and absolutely is just doing this to be petty (Ex-AAHW and all that, very likely he worked with Jeb at some point even if not side by side) so pointing out his hypocritical remarks ONLY in places he can't defend himself against (so like, important to say doc isn't saying "oh but you were a nexus scientist!" in response to "ghoulish experiments" but INSTEAD "well, you weren't complaining when i was putting you back together" so he like. literally cant come back from that) and fucking with him by letting hank just maul the shit out of the guy is also a really funny and really petty thing to do. "Thanks for helping me achieve my goal, STUPID! MR WIMBLETON KILL THIS CHARLATAN."

i think hank and 2bd probably bond over this a little bit too LOL. they may be opposites in so many ways but they fucking HATE that little prick. entitled, hypocritical, and most of all a pain in the ass to deal with.

okay finally; ETC DOC HEADCANONS

bottom surgery king

u know that thing autistic people do where they look the most bored out of their mind and in reality they're like actually having a really good time. Yeah

i think not only is her house VERY cold but he has like an abysmal amount of coolers, like from all the dead bodies and organs and shit she has to preserve just to perform all this experiments and most importantly COMPUTERS GET SOOO HOT WHEN THEY RUN A LOT & FOR LONG!! HIS ASS HAS SO MANY.

very warm body though (and also probably why he wears a fur lined coat? u saw the live action trailer ...)

i'll die on this hill forever but he fucking loves experimental music and raves and especially shit like bull of heaven and venetian snares and drill & bass music and anything weirdo and light. probably also felix kubin. my friend is Music Pilling Me

dogshit at gaming. still god at puzzles (minesweeper + crossword + picross ...)

i think at times he has to get with skinner to fix hank up and shit like sometimes it's so bad that shit needs to get peer reviewed.

to add onto that: so in canon the goggles he wears apparently has a HUD according to the arena mode description. wikihow "how to do surgery" alongside "grunt anatomy diagram" on the side

i'll probably do another 2bhank headcanon megapost (likely with repeats but no one really gives a fuck abt that part) bc those are pretty much the rest of my headcanons. maybe even just a hank-only post?! hope you enjoyed 🫶🫶❤️🫶❤️

[blue-phones]

Random shit me and my friend have decided are canon (in our own Tranformers au). Honestly it hinges a lot of the concepts of Triple Changers and Combiners

Combiners are a naturally accruing thing, and can be either born (such as a split spark situation) or made when bots with comparable altmodes create a gestalt bond with one another

Triple Changers however aren’t a naturally accruing thing, they’re all made by adding the second alt mode. The only “functional” triple changers are the ones made pre-war like Springer. Tbe ones made during the war were/are unstable and likely dead or dying. The Autobots have never tried to make their own Tripled but the Deceptioncs have tried several time (Blitzwing, Astrotrain, etc) and none of them are stable.

Other stuff under the cut

Prowl has a large blast scar on his abdomen given to him by Barricade early in the war. He refused to have it fixed it painted over as it’s “unnecessary and cosmetic” (truthfully it’s a reminder not to trust so easily)

Hot Rod and Arcee are twins, Arcee having been the one to paint on Hot Rods flame decals. Later on, after he meets back up with her after becoming Rodimus, she is the one to help him fix his paint job

Arcee is also called tbe Terror on Two Wheels due to how fast she is (fastest two wheeler) and her fast reflexes

Cliffjumper and Bumblebee have always had alt modes that were very very similar (voltswagon and a mini cooper) (Ferrari and a Lambo in our universe)

Slipstream is directly below Starscream in seeker command (with thundercracker being directly below her). Her trine was lost in the beginning of the war and she now flys mostly solo missions. She has an outlier ability but we haven’t decided what exactly

Prowl and Kup were acquaintances before the war, which is why Prowl entrusted Springer with him (Prowl isn’t very similar to his IDW counterpart cuz we prefer other versions of him sorry)

Prowl wasn’t aware Springer was turned into a triple changer until he met up with Kup some ways into the war and met the Wreckers there (he was beyond mad but kept things under wrap to keep his and springer connection under wraps)

Elita-One as well as Windblade, Hot Rod, Cliffjumper, Bluestreak, and a few other bits were assumed dead for years due to their transport ship being blown up

Elita is a mother figure to Hot Rod and Arcee and an idol for a lot of bots including a lot of the wreckers

Her and Magnus were often partners in battle

Wheeljack was apart of the Wreckers till an injury took him off the front lines, which is when Preceptor took his place (they’re good friends). He’d join the main group on tbe Arc due to this injury where he’d befriend Jetfire and co.

Jetfire and Starscreams relationship would have been almost salvageable if not for the time Jetfire almost blew up Thundercracker. Skywarp and Starscream, two bots who typically don’t work well together, we’re almost done shredding down the door to the bunker Jetfire was hiding in before they were called off

Despite how nasty he can be, Starscream and Soundwave have an amicable relationship (they both have people they don’t want to lose and who’d they kill for) Starscream may bicker and nag his trine but he does shockingly care for them

Prowl cares for his gestalt but he’s just not open with it. He generally hates opening up around anyone unless they pry it out of him

Blaster and Wheeljack are very good friends

We have a sorta time line that I wanna talk about but its a little wonky

[notoriousbeb]

TTPD Thoughts - The Manuscript (Pt. 1)

TTPD Notes Glossary

"Fortnight"  

Definitely written in the spring of 2023. I think the video was shot in the fall.  

The concept of treason/being a traitor comes up in reference to Harry in 1989 as well (“you dream of my mouth before it called you a lying traitor”)  

In the music video, the typewriter Taylor is using is missing the 1 key (like the song “The 1”?) and she leaves several blank spaces in her writing of “I love you, it’s ruining my life” (perhaps a nod to the “Blank Space” song?)  

When Taylor and Post Malone are laying in the Taylor head silhouette it's a callback to the "Style" music video from the original 1989 era, where the Harry stand in guy is standing on a beach in a silhouette of Taylor's head.  

You know who is tattooed and kinda hot and thus a good Harry stand in a MV? Posty.  

I think she's envisioning a kind of nightmare future of being trapped in the metaphorical neighborhood that is their small industry and having to watch him move on while she continues to love him (ugh. thanks, it's beautiful and sounds awesome and i hate it).  

The last new album, "Midnights,” ends with "Hits Different,” on the line, "Is that your key in the door, down the hallway? Is that your key in the door, is it okay? Is it you? Or have they come to take me away? To take me away?" First line of Fortnight, the first song on TTPD? "I was supposed to be sent away but they forgot to come and get me.”  

A slight diversion into "Hits Different" and why I've always believed it's about Harry:  She's clubbing, so that narrows down the choices right away to either Harry or Calvin, but based on how she went right from Calvin to Tom to Joe and was definitely not heartbroken enough to be puking, but rather immediately enamored with someone else....We learn that, technically, she broke up with him ("curse the space that I needed") but she's devastated. Like "I broke my own heart, cuz you were too polite to do it?" This really seals it as 1989 Harry to me.  

“The Tortured Poets Department”  

Definitely written in the spring of 2023  

“Who else decodes you?” reminds me of how Harry called their back-and-forth song writing to/about each other (cue the “Fortnight” typewriter smoke battle) “the most amazing unspoken dialogue ever.”  

A “tattooed golden retriever?” I mean… come the fuck on. That’s a Harry descriptor if I’ve ever seen one.  

“You’re in self-sabotage mode, throwing spikes down on the road, but I’ve seen this episode and I still love the show.” “You awaken with dread pounding nails in your head. But I’ve read this one where you come undone." These aren’t the words of someone who merely wondered about what it would be like to be with a friend or acquaintance. These are two people who deeply know each other and have been together before.  

Also, Harry has documented anxiety that she’s also sung about it previously (“did you get anxious though, on the drive home?” - Now That We Don’t Talk)  

I hate and love the fact that they both told people they would kill themselves if it didn’t work out. I hate it, because that’s a terrible, dumb plan. But I love the passion. Also, who is Lucy? Was he taking to Lucy from Boygenius? That Lucy openly dislikes Matty on main, so I think it’s weird people are using her as a proof point that this song is about him. Did Taylor change that particular name here because it would have been a dead giveaway for this song being about Harry?  (Someone like, Ed, perhaps?)

“My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys  

Probably written in spring 2023  

She refers to the muse as the “sickest (I believe this is a double meaning as in cool and also having mental illness issues) army doll purchased at the mall.”  

You ever seen a G.I. Joe under the fatigues? They don’t look like a pasty ex heroin addict. They do look like a certain former boy-bander from Manchester, though. Just saying.  

“Oh, here we go again,” “put me back on my shelf,” “we could’ve played for keeps this time,” “I knew too much/there was danger in the heat of my touch,” “he saw forever so he smashed it up.” Again, these are things you say about someone you’ve been with before, on and off, not someone you saw in concert twice and worked with once. You, especially, don’t see forever with someone after only 20 days.  

“But you should’ve seen him when he first got me.” We did see Matty. Was there someone else in the background who, perhaps, we did not see? Perhaps a certain curly haired former Boy Bander?

“‘Cause it fit too right/Puzzles pieces in the dead of night.” Hmm. Doesn’t sound like the mediocre sex described in “The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived” to me

Want to know what lines had me crying in the club on my sad girl walk? “Just say when—I’d play again. He was my best friend down at the sand lot.” Again, these are two people who know each other very well, and have for a long time.  

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 721: Bottles!!

Pag 1

1: To deliver the supplies they're carrying, and their hopes, they're franticly chasing!!

Pag 2

1: It's too hot for this jacket

2: I'll take it off

Even though the forecast said it would be a little cooler..

Thanks- with this weather I already want to eat an ice-cream

3: It's starting to blow a hot south wind from the sea, suddenly

4: It's humid, too..... I feel the sudden heat of this season in my body

Pag 3

1: For the cyclists running it must be much more hard

Pag 4

6: The tempersture is rising higher than I imagined

Since earlier some people, because of the heat....

Pag 5

1: Got separated from this pack

Senpai, I can't do it- the heat.... my leg is cramped

Do your best, Nishikawa!

2: Senpai, at least take my bottle and go

Nishikawa!

3: I'm sweating a lot

4: And earlier I emptied my second bottle, too

5: Onoda's expression isn't showing feelings, either

6: “If the forecast was right and we're without supplies...”.... you're thinking that, right?

7: Yeah

Like this, we probably won't last... until the finish line

Yeah

Pag 6

1: Right now, the thing I want the most....

4: is water bottles

Pag 7

1: Straight road!!

2: Two people from Sohoku jumped ahead!!

What's with that speed!?

They plant to reach the lead!?

Pag 8

2: The guy in the lead

3: his legs are so thick!!

4: And the guy behind him

Pag 9

2: Why does he have his jersey on his head!?

I can only see his back!

Is that a new diversionary tactic!?

3: Don't think!!

4: Just pedal!!

Pag 10

3: Alright!!

4: I can see the lead!! Rokudai!!

5: Imaizumi-san and the others will be among....!!

Gau!!

Pag 11

1: Them!!

Pag 12

4: They..... they.....

5: They're not here....!?

Well.... sorry to keep you waiting, teh!!

Here's the supplies, teh!!

Alright, alright

6: I'm- I'm so glad, we were so scared our race was over....

Pag 13

1: Not yet, Rokudai

2: What? This hand

3: Is it to eat?

5: This is the second pack; Imaizumi-san and the others are in the pack that's even more ahead of this!!

Pag 14

1: Gau!?

2: It's not the time to eat my hand, Rokudai

The “lead” is further ahead

They've probably

3: already entered the mounains!!

4: Dammit!! We have to deliver these things!!

What do we do!! From the road map, I saw that this time in the mountain is a winding climb!!

5: My “straight road” can only move us streight ahead, so it won't work on a winding road!!

6: What do we do!!

Pag 15

1: Ah

Gau

2: Gau!!

I’ve been told I'm a “climber”!!

Gau

That's true!!

4: Let's go, Rokudai, don't give up yet

Run up the mountain until we reach the lead pack!!

Pag 16

1: Gau!!

Two people from Sohoku are moving forward!

Wait, what's with that speed!!

Pag 17

1: They're so fast!!

2: Hn!? He really is fast

Wait, this guy

3: He's faster than he was during the first years' race!?

4: I'm pretty out of breath, it's hard for me!!

6: I mean, I told him to stop being all “hyaa hyaa”, but

This guy!!

Pag 18

1: He's faster when he's pedaling without thinking of anything!!

2: I wonder why, but I feel like there's a bottomless  wildness in Rokudai

Gau

Teh

3: Alright, I'll name that “Beast Mode”

4: Anywa, this is bad, I'm falling behind!

Wait, Rokudai

Gau

Pag 19

1: Naruko ran away... I can see the first chasing pack

There's a lot of people

It's... nine people!!

Gooo!!

Kamogawa do your best!!

2: Sohoku sent one cyclist ahead alone, Naruko, while two others are here!! Two people?

Amazing! They're rock solid!

3: As expected, Sohoku is so confident

And there's Onoda, last year's national champion

He'll jump ahead any time now- Onodaa!!

4: Jump ahead...!!

Pag 20

1: Right, if they jump ahead now...  if they come together with Naruko now, it'll be the perfect battle formation

So why

2: Why aren't you moving, Sohoku!!

Are you too confident!?

3: ….. or maybe

6: Could it be that their bottles....

Don't tell me that it's the opposite!!

7: One person is jumping ahead!!

Pag 21

1: The man who inerited the name of the fastest man on Kyosumiyama, the third one of the Kanogawa Honda siblings!!

Honda Ryouzou from Kanogawa high school!!

2: My brothers' dream of partecipating in the Inter High

I'll make that dream come true!!

3: This Inter High qualifiers are held in Kanogawa, our hometown, so I feel like it's destiny!!

4: Honda from Kamo High is accelerating!!

5: He left them behind in a twinkle!!

The defending champions, Sohoku....

6: Aren't moving!!

7: They're not moving!! Sohoku isn't confident!!

[moonlight-tmd]

Femme blitzbee

It gets revealed bee is a femme and when he wears his actual frame *the key healed him after his chassis was ripped off in battle* and he has door wings and a femme figure.

Bee doesn’t want to tell them why he changed his frame but its for a terribly angsty reason.

He liked having a femme frame but he also wanted to be addressed as a mech.

Bee goes off * a new alt mode thats sleek and a muscle car * for a drive and runs into Blitz who is also a femme a muscular femme that has a thing for mini femmes like bee and bee has a thing for large femme bots like blitz

Hmmm I mean, it could work.

I saw few of the posts like this on other blogs and I know the same folks sends them.

I'm not really into this idea myself but I guess it could do well with the idea I wrote a while back with this kinda Bee.

I guess they are both essentially trans in this- so after Bee's overarmor gets trashed in a fight ge goes on a ride meanwhile Ratchet repairs it and bumps into Blitzwing who's also doing the same thing with the overarmor.

Blitz is surprised but makes it fun with jokes and teasing. Dare I say he even tkes off his own overarmor to show that Bee is not the only one.

Meanwhile Bee is over there very flustered cuz holy heck Blitz was kind of attractive but now- hooo this is hot. Blitz on the other hand is playfully teasing him and purposefully getting too close for the reactions- he likes this tiny bot and thinks he's adorably sexy.

lol they defo say some masculine compliments to each other to validate them being mechs. Just bcuz they're enemies doesn't mean they have to be bigots.

[yellowhollyhock]

Tmnt Memory mash up part 2 (finally ran out of jokes for the first one)

Concept is, there is no concept we have no idea what’s real because memories are wonky, everyone is a storyteller, and Casey is gaslighting them all. (Actual concept: characters remember the same events differently because that’s how brains work, but now it’s taken to an extreme where the basis for different turtle realities comes from each set of memories.)

Rise Raph, 2012 Mikey, 2003 Donnie, 2007 Leo, 1987 Splinter, 1990s April

Leo: You guys need to focus. It’s just like I learned during my training—

Raph: Your training? Are you talking about when you became a mascot for that basketball team?

Donnie: Raphie, be nice. You know Leo takes ninjitsu very seriously.

Raph: *cackles*

Mikey: pfft yeah haha, he’s a big goofy dork who loves cartoons, trying to act all serious haha (he tried to sacrifice himself again last week why are we laughing)

Mikey: Yo dudes, I made us some pizza, shaken not stirred, canned meat supreme with jalapeños and strawberries, light on rosemary heavy on hot sauce. We’re ready for movie night!

Raph: You’re so creative with food! ❤️ You were watching that cooking show you like again, weren’t you?

April:

Leo:

Donnie:

Splinter: You are a great chef, Michelangelo. Because of my peculiar tastes I will be eating sushi.

Casey: There’s definitely algae on this pizza.

Leo: Casey shut up we’re eating

Donnie, on the last slide of a PowerPoint: And so, Leo, I think you will plainly understand, you cannot go outside.

Leo: What about Raph and Mikey?

Donnie: Did Mikey almost accidentally ally with our family’s nemesis?

Leo: No, but—

Donnie: Did Raph get poisoned at the Battle Nexus?

Leo: Well, no, but—

Donnie: Did Raph or Mikey or Splinter or April or even Casey fight an army of Foot by himself while still recovering emotionally from our first presumed defeat of said nemesis, and end up facing him again, getting thrown through a window, and falling into a coma?

Leo: But you said you were abducted by aliens! And what about all those adventures in alternate dimensions you talk about? Your safety is also important! (fuming)

Donnie: Well I’m not the one who had to go away for training. 😘

Leo: But you did take that horrible phone line job while I was away for training, and do not tell me that was less traumatic!

Donnie: … phone line job???

Leo: Yeah, the—didn’t you—Casey told me you worked in tech support?

Donnie: Casey told you—Casey said—I am the cofounder of O’Neil Technologies he told you I got a phone line job?

Splinter: You must center yourselves, my students. The mind is a powerful weapon.

April: So does he always just call you guys his students?

Donnie: Nah, I think he says ‘my son’ more often than he says my name, he’s just in training mode right now.

Leo: Yeah, it’s more in private conversations that he’ll use familial terms. He really means it with just as much affection when he says students.

Mikey: lol I have been called both son and student with varying degrees of affection and annoyance. When he says my name I run for my life

Raph:

April: Um, you okay Raph?

Raph: He mostly just calls me Red…

Everyone: Dude….

April: Hey do you guys remember that guy who got mixed up with a bad crowd, almost did something really irreversible but then met you guys and turned it around and helped us instead?

Donnie: Angel!

Splinter: Ah, yes, young Carter. I hope his studies are going well.

Mikey: Mondo Gecko my man!

Leo: Do you mean your boss Winters? I mean he was the most recent.

Raph: That was Casey.

Casey: That was me.

April:

April: Anyway I was talking with his dad the other day—

Mikey: You ever had feelings for someone, Leo? Feelings you didn’t know what to do about? Feelings that kept you up at night?

Leo: Mikey I told you, I didn’t stay away that extra time because of a girlfriend.

Mikey: Maybe even feelings that make you act stupid. Feelings like Raph has for his Mona Lisa, or Donnie for April?

Raph and Donnie, eavesdropping:

Raph: What’s going on with you and April??

Donnie: Nothing I’m aware of. Maybe she borrowed a tool without asking or something. Who’s your Mona Lisa?

Raph: Raph wishes he knew.

Mikey: The heart’s a soft muscle, dude. Squish squish.

Leo: I literally have no idea what you’re talking about.

Casey: Hey Mikey! How are things going with that time traveling girl you liked? I can’t remember her name.

Mikey: Time-traveling girl..? Wait yo dude that hasn’t happened for me yet. I think you just accidentally revealed my future!

Casey: Cool, I didn’t even know I was from the future. I wonder if I could convince Leo he might start an apocalypse if he doesn’t find, like a certain artifact or something….

Donnie, again on PowerPoint: If I were to disappear, the whole world would fall to pieces. Shredder victorious. Raph and Leo estranged forever, unable to reconcile after Master Splinter’s tragic death. Mikey and April, the lone fighters against the growing tide of darkness, barely clinging onto hope. Mikey’s lost one of his arms, and with it the spark of joy in his eyes.

Raph: Who let him have coffee

Splinter: I believe he has had a nightmare. We must guard against these dark thoughts.

Donnie, staring into the distance: That dragon-daimyo merged guy nearly won the Battle Nexus. It looked like the blue bunny poisoned Leo, but in the end he stood beside him in battle. At least Raphie won his planet race.

Raph: Who let him have poison pizza puffs

Mikey: Ay Raph that’s scarily specific?

Mikey: They always forget that I’m good at science, too. I help Dee out in the lab with ideas and stuff. I mean, I don’t understand science, but I got good instincts for it. They need to remember that.

Casey: Yeah, like when you created Ice Cream Kitty.

Mikey: Yeah! What.

Casey: Or when you cured Donnie of that stuff that made him super dumb.

Mikey: No yeah but go back to what you said about Ice Cream Kitty.

Donnie: Do you guys remember that jungle dimension we went to with the really big bugs?

Mikey: Did you just call our own city a jungle dimension?

Leo: Reminds me of my training. I miss the jungle….

Mikey, humming to himself: welcome to the jungle, it’s worse here every day, you learn to live like an animal in the jungle where we play

Raph: Did you guys all portal somewhere without me?

Mikey and Donnie: You wanted to see the giant bugs?

Raph:

Raph: Well, no, but—