#WHY ARE YOU ALL INSANE. THIS IS NOT A SPEEDRUN YOU DO NOT NEED TO BE AS EFFICIENT AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE

[rowan-crowan]

i got a new laptop recently so i'm setting up all my browser stuff and re-bookmarking all my japanese learning materials in a more orderly fashion, and as i'm doing this i have such conflicted feelings

because on one hand, i'm incredibly grateful to have such a large number of resources or suggestions for resources easily available for free online, all in my native language, and for having such a wide net of people constantly updating those and improving upon them. most world languages don't have the number of speakers or the sort of prestige to build up this many resources, especially online. meanwhile japanese gets you about a dozen dedicated study plans, giant optimized flashcard decks, and as many textbook recs as you could possibly want, all because people on the internet are passionate about learning it

and on the other hand, god. i wish these resources were not compiled by the sort of person who compiles things for their Ultimate Most Efficient Way To Learn Japanese (im not saying you cant do something else, just that i think my method is the most efficient and i've yet to be proved wrong *audible smirk*) Guide

[convexicalcrow]

Look, it was all perfectly reasonable to invite Jevin and Cleo to dine on his ship, the Symmetria. It was his own little place out here in exile! Where else would he host a dinner party?

Okay, sure, maybe he missed False a little, maybe he did, but that was only to be expected, right? He was fine. Jevin and Sal, they were the weird ones. He'd gone weird with the isolation. But not Ren, no! He hadn't named his ship after the one other person (aside from Doc) that he missed the most, and wasn't planning to serve salmon for dinner either, right? He wasn't mad. No, the others were mad. He was perfectly sane out here.

Still, he did often spend time fishing off the boat, because, well, it was his home! His little slice of paradise! What else would you do on a boat apart from fish?

Honestly, it was just nice to be away from the Gigabase for a while. The sheer extent of his to-do list was, granted, rather daunting. It required a lot of extra blueprints that he wasn't sure still existed in an easily accessible manner in the GigaCorp databases. That would prove... difficult. But, hey, he was 30 million blocks from all of that nonsense! Finally, he could just relax. And, hey, if GigaCorp wanted him, well, they knew where to find him. And the time it would take to gather the materials needed to transport himself back to the rest of the hermits was, quite frankly, astronomical. So that wouldn't be happening any time soon!

At least he had Cleo out here. And Jevin, of course! He'd definitely have gone weirder if he was out here on his own. Isolation was not allowed as a GigaCorp employee. It's why he was with the other Hermits. He could do his own thing, and they would keep him from going insane.

Well.

Ren looked at the salmon skull he held in his hands.

Well.

Okay. Maybe taking Sal had been...

But this was Lord King Sal! Ruler of ExileLands! Of course Sal had to be at the dinner!

And as soon as he thought that, he could feel False judging him. Laughing at his ridiculous theatrics. She would have laughed so hard if she'd watched him jump off his own tower to get himself exiled! His pathetic scream as he realised what he'd done and missed the river below. Oh, how terrible! She would laugh so hard at him.

But, alas, she was 30 million blocks away. This ship was the best he would get. The Symmetria! Of course he would build a boat. That was her Big Business this season. Rivers and boats and waterways. It was just a coincidence he had set himself up in a boat, of course. It was just a nice place to build, and the river was ripe for the taking.

She'd never get herself exiled, though, right? No, False was too smart for that. She'd won Demise, after all. He wasn't sure the Poe Poe were smart enough to exile her. Maybe they would try? But he wasn't sure they would succeed. If there's one thing he knew about False it's that she's very good at winning things. She'll say she's terrible, and then go on to win it and make it look effortless.

He'd sent her a couple of teasing messages though. Very unserious invitations to join them in Exile, knowing full well she would not come at all. He would be without her until such time as the Permit Office allows them to return. And then he would have to return to his gigantic to-do list and catch up on however much he had missed while he was in exile. But he would have False Symmetry back, and maybe that would be worth the hassle.

He set Sal on a ledge, overlooking the table he'd set up. Time to cook some dinner! Salmon, of course, because what else was out here apart from steakage? Besides, clearly Jevin was fond of the fish, so he'd enjoy eating it, right? Yeah, that made sense to Ren, anyway.

He would have lit some candles if he'd had any beeswax. But he wasn't really worried about that. He wasn't really worried about speedrunning out of the early game either. All he needed was this little boat and the fishing dock. He'd be fine with that. Right? He didn't need a proper base, not out here. He'd build if it made sense for New (New New) Hermiton, but otherwise, he would go mining, and fishing, and just relax with his friends. And then come home to Symmetria, and dream about that one missing part of himself. It wasn't just Cleo and Ren, it was Cleo, Ren, and False. One day, maybe, it would be again.

[boss-poss]

See, Lethal Company's real genius is that it somehow marries two normally opposed genres, those being horror and comedy together into something greater. Mechanically it's a multiplayer looter extraction survival type game. It's designed to create stressful and scary situations by forcing you to speedrun mini randomized dungeons while monsters hunt your character to meet a certain quota (our asses are not making quota). That's not the clever part though, no, that's giving the players the ability to fuck themselves over and the hilarity that comes from it.

Anything you say into your mic is said in the game world and can be heard by certain monsters. Many items, similarly, can be used to make noise and you can bet there is little impulse control when a player finds an air horn or gets a walkie talkie. The sound of a distant honk somewhere out of nowhere is not something most players are prepared for while in a pitch black maze. Sound in this game has a doppler effect, which makes it harder to hear the further away the source is, allowing screams to fade into nothing and unintelligible yelling heard for a second before vanishing. You must rely on your senses but those are, by design, limited and regularly tricked.

Because level layouts, monster locations, and item spawns are all random, it's insanely easy to get lost or lose track of thigs, especially in the dark and especially when panicking. Seeing a bracken for the first time will almost certainly send a player running in the opposite direction and get lost, if they even see it all. No one is prepared to have a hand wrap around their face and snap their neck in an instant. It's utterly shocking and will leave you gasping in surprise to first time you experience it.

Certain weather patterns make levels harder, some even nearly impossible (looking at you eclipse), and sometimes your options are avoiding deadly lightning or not being able to see due to fog. High level moons have excessively valuable loot but also feature the worst foes and cost a fee to access, forcing a compromise between greed, ability, and resources.

Dying, likewise incurs a penalties. Your team is fined for dying and not bringing the bodies back but if you all die, all your collected loot goes poof. Gone. A team wipe can and will effectively end the run in an instant if you do something stupid like stick around when you hear "pop goes the weasel" or try to pick up that funny looking roomba. You can almost feel the pressure weighing down on your shoulders when you realize you're the last one left and you need to get back to the ship or miss the quota.

The monsters likewise, are engines of terror that are comically effective killing machines with no cohesive theme to help anticipate them. The already mentioned bracken is one of the scariest things I've seen in a game, and those technically aren't even that bad. They're completely manageable if you keep your head on a swivel and pay attention to your surroundings. Coilheads are these mannequins with bobble heads that will path to and kill you in a microsecond the moment you aren't looking at them, weeping angel style. There's a thing called the ghost girl that I have yet to see but is apparently one of the most terrifying critters in the menagerie. Forest giants. If you know, you know.

All these little mechanics, these choices that are made by and for the player, create a maelstrom of unpredictable chaos that, like a buxom blond transforming into an orgasming pooltoy, turns what would be strictly serious horror into a unique form of dark comedy that layers over it like jelly on peanut butter. You are scared, you are on edge, and it only gets worse when you know what these things are capable of, but the sheer hopelessness is something you all have in common. It's funny how little hope you have. You will die. A monster will wipe your team. There will eventually come a quota you can't beat. You were doomed from the start.

So why not get silly with it? Why not try to fight that bracken with shovel? Fuck him. Why not just run past a turret and try to nab that fat jar of pickles? Why not wander off from the group? You're just as likely to come back with arms loaded and the quota met as you are likely to not come back at all. You're already dead, so take the gamble, do stupid shit, repeat this hell until you can meet its horrors with grim determination and put in the effort to afford that goddamn boombox. Dance. Just press 1 and dance the fear away.

You are all united in your mortality and duty, fragile sacks of flesh working to break even at the behest of perhaps the greatest horror of all: The company you work for. You are so preposterously fucked beyond all belief from every angle there really isn't enough adjectives to describe it. And that's comedy baby, when things are so bad all you can do is laugh.

[sulumuns-dootah]

What WHB characters would wear in the human world: Gehenna

⟡ Masterlist ⟡ 

A/N: Very much inspired by the fact that demons in Obey Me have their own lil outfits while going to visit their favorite human ^^

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This short king is very much hot biker guy coded.

You know those tiktoks of guys who are showing off on the road and then do stupid shit at gas stations? That's this guy right here

He's not really a brand specific guy, but if you press him, he'll rave to you about MXDVS (honestly, same here ^^)

Darkwear/Techwear/Warcore

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Soft boi™

Light colors, nature, tea

Despite having his uniform altered to have black slutty shirt, he's very much cottagecore

He bakes, makes tea and cares for his fellow demons, need I say more?

Soft boy/Cottagecore

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V europian gay prince coded indeed

Dorian Gray kinnie

Open shirts all year around, only when it's cold/raining, he'll wear a coat over his shoulders

Vampirecore/Light academia

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Lose Paimon in the crowd any% speedrun IMPOSSIBLE challenge

The more colorful, the better

Gotta wear bright colors to match their bright personality

Indie/Kidcore/Harajuku

also pics credit to @/butterfliesworkforsatan on tiktok ^^

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Another dramatic ass fashionista

This time make it goth

You can't see it, but he's got eyliner on

What you see, however, is Jiyu wearing the same eyeliner

Vampirecore/Romantic Goth

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Ooh he seducin' with more than his words allright

'Hey, my eyes are up here'

Sadly his snake has to be replaced by snake skin boots, but don'T worry, he snake is unharmed and chilling at home in Hell

Big Daddy vibes

Suits and trutlenecks

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Anything sporty, really

Likes wearing gray sweatpants bc he gets a lot of compliments

Thinks that grey is just his color

Don't ever tell him the real reason for the sake of u all

Also, maaaaaybee you could accdientally shrink his clothes in the wash so it's tighter on him?

   ༺☆༻

Oh boy, good luck explaining to Juno, that he can't exactly be mostly naked outside or he'll draw too much unwanted attention

'But I've got this insanely hot body! Why should I hide it? Other's should be lucky to see me like that! I'm literally the hottest red lump in Hell!'

Cue in Juno trying to find things that are technically clothes that still show off his muscles

Damiano David ultimatelly becomes his fashion icon

Also Hatari

When this man discovers fishnets? Ooh boy

Good luck talking him out of just wearing full fishnet bodysuit

(and yes, it's hard to find pics that wouldn't get my post flagged by tumblr)

[genericpuff]

Why is the art so unappealing in lore Olympus now Persephone looks like a highlighter and maybe it’s just me but the proportions like the fingers in arms are soul over the place I don’t think they used to be this bad. Am I just looking at it with nostalgia or am I crazy ?

Honestly, nostalgia does play a huge part in it, even to this day there are times I look back on old S1 panels and go-

Actually here's a great example that literally just happened yesterday in the ULO Discord that nearly had me on the floor LOL This is from Episode 70:

Like I didn't even believe that that was real until I was told what episode it was from and I was just. Astounded and flabbergasted. The over-shading of the blanket that just makes it look like a really bad edit. Insane.

And yeah, there are a lot of old panels that hit different now that the rose-colored glasses have been removed, crushed, and thrown into the trash compactor.

I think that's why it makes it all the more amusing when people come into my inbox and ask me "wait, why did you like LO to begin with?? It's always been ugly as shit, I think you're just romanticizing it" because like... there's something to be said about art and subjectivity, even if something is ugly to one person doesn't mean it isn't beautiful to someone else. It's why I try not to be too mean towards the fans of this comic for still enjoying it, because while I definitely have strong opinions about how "LO has gotten worse" and what kind of following Rachel has cultivated (cough cough), there are also just as equally valid arguments that LO has never begin good to begin with that I can't necessarily disagree with now that I'm looking back on it with a more critical eye.

That said, there's tons of media that I enjoy that is objectively awful. Like y'all, you don't need to take my opinions about a dumb pink x blue fantasy romance comic seriously, I like Starfox Adventures-

Like yeah it's a badly made rushed piece of shit that was developed right on the ass end of Rare's glory days and was really an original IP (Dinosaur Planet) that got Frankenstein'd into a Starfox game so it could "sell better" for Nintendo, but I don't give a fuck, I love Starfox Adventures and some day I wanna be in the top 10 speedrunner leaderboards for it, which I know doesn't mean much because no one is speedrunning Starfox, but I do and no one can take that away from me dammit-

Anyways. Lore Olympus has, in many regards, always had "bad art". But "bad art" can and should still be enjoyed by those who find joy in it.

And in LO's case, the world it existed in when it launched was a lot smaller than it is now - more specifically, the world of Webtoons. We can look back and see how 'bad' LO looks and reads now because there are genuinely way better comics surrounding it. It was unique and refreshing and experimental back then... now it's just "that stupid blue and pink comic for horny teenagers".

In most cases I would consider that "cringing in hindsight" feeling a good thing because normally it means something has grown and that it seeming "bad" in hindsight would mean that it's outgrown itself and moved onto bigger things. But LO has the more unique problem of "its current stuff is shit and it's making us want the old stuff more, even if the old stuff wasn't good either". In that regard, LO is closer to being like Harry Potter. Remember when The Cursed Child came out at the height of Rowling being exposed for being a TERF and even people who liked Harry Potter didn't like The Cursed Child because it was just objectively worse overall (with or without Rowling's bullshit attached)? It made a lot of people go back and re-read / rewatch Harry Potter with a more objective lens and go "wait a minute guys, I think we only adored these books so much because we were 12 when we read them". Often times it's the good memories we have surrounding certain things that make us have the opinion about them that we do.

Of course, LO is definitely not as politically weaponized as Harry Potter is, so that's where that comparison ends. But my point is that LO is definitely in a situation where it's been riding off the same privileges it had back in 2018 - having an 'experimental' art style while also utilizing tropes and characters that were VERY popular at the time (remember that 2017-18 was when Tumblr was at its height of H x P "Hades was a chill accountant guy who wore socks and sandals and didn't cheat on his wife like Zeus did" fantasizing) - and thinks that those same tricks and tropes will still work today.

Because of this, the art in LO really, really hasn't aged well, even the stuff that we look back on fondly. But I think it's the panels that we specifically think of when remembering "old LO" - the ones that stuck in our memories the most - that are the ones that make us miss or just not care about the panels that don't look good (the panels that make people question why we ever liked it to begin with).

We liked it because of how it made us feel to look at panels like these-

Those genuinely wonderful panels that we think back on the most don't exist separately from the bad panels, they exist in spite of them. Even if we can look back on panels like these and pick out problems in the lineart or the proportions or the color travelling outside of the lines, that can't and shouldn't change how those panels made us feel at some point or another. And that's why when people ask me "why were you even into LO in the first place" I don't have any one answer, because I can't fully explain how something made me feel to justify why it's good to someone who can see from the outside - without rose-colored glasses - that it evidently isn't. It's very much a "you had to be there" type of thing.

Unfortunately, nowadays even the 'best' LO panels in S3 still don't come close to what the S1 panels accomplished - because for many of us, the rose-colored glasses are gone, we can't appreciate the good among the bad because we know now how bad it truly is and so the good just feels like wasted attempts at trying to recreate something it can no longer be. It "came back wrong" so to speak.

LO came back just regular. But our journey to resurrecting it changed us to such a degree that even its closest intimacies are now foreign to us. Sorry dude.

This is still probably one of my favorite panels out of the entirety of S3 for being as close to "old LO" as I've seen since S2, and even it feels like a mistake, an accident, how could a panel like this exist in S3 when so much of it is a dumpster fire? It's like a flower growing in the ruins of an apocalyptic wasteland.

But wasn't that always the case? Isn't that 'always' what LO has been, since the very beginning? A poorly cobbled together mess of writing and panels that, every now and then, manages to leave an impression that makes you feel something? Did we ever truly know LO? Or have we just been relying entirely on an idea of it that we've built up in our heads that when it does do exactly what it's evidently always done (even if not made apparent until looking back on it in hindsight) we think it "came back wrong"?

[theincorrigiblemagpie]

Anne of the Island - the last chunk of the book

I'm going to SPEEDRUN several chapters here because I cannot believe I came back on the LAST day of book club! This is going to be very long but I can't just skip to the end.

Just to add to the list of reasons I hate Mrs Douglas, she would think it frivolous of Janet to wear a pretty dress but sees no issue with wearing nicely tailored silk dresses herself!

Ugh the hateful woman can sure design a high tea menu. Does she take time off from Evil Plotting to read women's magazines?

Imagine if Mrs Douglas lived another 10 years?? Insanity

I never want to hear shit about how age makes you more forgiving. If anything, I was more patient in some ways in my 20s, than in my 30s. Good for Janet and John but the fact they won't tell people what Mrs Douglas did is SO frustrating!

Heavily relate to the humour and horror associated with reading your own old work. At some point, I learned not to stuff pop culture references in every crevice, but before that, it was a bloodbath of song lyrics and viral memes and movie references.

Bring back walking parties, I say! I enjoy walking around and wish I could do more of it with my friends.

Anne's mental note about Christine's walk lol

The scene of the Gardner visit is one of my favourites in this book. I weep for Pris' cake. She could've just offered them some but chose the much funnier option.

I'd never heard the name Aline before when I'd first read AoI. And then many years later, I found it in one of Lisa Kleypas' Regency romances. It's one of those names I've remembered for having felt somewhat unfamiliar to me. Pretty, though.

Lmao remembering how I furtively looked up 'gumption' in the dictionary at 11 years old, almost as if Aunt Jimsie's ghost would catch me in the act and judge me for it.

Look, I don't care how Phil reacted when Anne turned down Roy's proposal. You'll never convince me that she wasn't playing the long game to get Anne and Gilbert together.

Gilbert just needs a hug. :( Imagine seeing Anne carry your flowers at convocation and your foolish heart thinking may be there's something there for you after all and then bravely asking her for a dance at the graduation party even though your head is telling you it's a bad idea only to be turned down again!!

I've moved around a bunch in my life and I definitely feel like I've left pieces of me behind in every place I've spent meaningful time in! I wholeheartedly agree with Phil's sentiments about places acquiring personalities.

I do wish we got to see more of the very prescient Stella! She's said a handful of lines in the entire book and most of them have been very insightful or practically useful.

I actually think more highly of Phil for being hard on Anne initially. I know, I know, there's a lot of 'we support women's rights, but more importantly, we support women's wrongs' feeling I see around on social media. And I'm mostly for it, even. But I do think it's important to hold your friends accountable and have difficult conversations sometimes.

The image of Roy pining away over women who didn't even know he was into them, probably, is killing me lmao.

I know Mrs Lynde is being very bitter about Jane but it comes entirely out of her love for Anne so I can't be mad about it.

Lol now why is Mrs Harmon salty about Anne's BA? Didn't she think it was pointless anyway? Or am I misremembering?

Ugh this woman is just unrelentingly bitchy.

Reddit would hate the age gap between Mr Inglis and Jane lmaoo

Looked this up and it seems to refer to HW Longfellow's poem Evangeline, A Tale of Acadie. Acadie is just Nova Scotia, PEI, NB and part of Maine. Makes sense for a poor minister to not be able to go far on his honeymoon!

One of my baby cousins got married a few days ago and Anne's thoughts about Diana's motherhood are hitting even harder.

Mrs Allan's story about her mother has always made me tear up a bit.

The scene where Anne hears about Gilbert's illness is appropriately awful but I'm dying over Davy's interjections. "He's dying." "Nooo, there's still hope." "The doctor said there's no hope." Absolutely screaming.

The paragraphs where Anne realises she loves Gilbert are SO GOOD. Ugh.

I'll never get tired of LMM's descriptions. It makes me want to see PEI and Canada like nothing else.

I'm obviously partial to Gilbert but also, this is such a top-tier proposal. And to do it in Hester Gray's garden? 5 stars. No notes. Perfect ending.

I've had such a good time doing this book club with you all, I'm sad it's over!

[djevelbl]

HIIIIIIIII i went to watch the minecraft movie today!!! yayyyy!!!!!!

yap beneath the read more <3

it was fun! but sooooo bad. you dont get it it was TERRIBLE - not even in a "oh my god they dont even know what minecraft is" way but more in a "this is an insult to storytelling and writers everywhere" way. and im only kinda exaggerating /silly

like. the story was genuinely trying for a good spot in the minecraft speedrun leaderboards bc otherwise i cant comprehend WHY IN FUCK they were rushing that shit 😭😭 to the point that when the movie ended i turned to my mum going all "THAT WAS THE ENDING?????" bc i SWEAR i thought there was another half hour left. nope. they just rushed through the story

the whole thing there at the end with henry being all "oh no imma go back to the real world, im just not gonna let them take my creativity away!" was soooo shoehorned in, NOTHING in the fucking movie actually shows that henry came to that conclusion himself. garret wanting to go back also made no fucking sense to me???? like girllll wasnt he drowning in debts? why didnt he stay in the overworld like hellooooo???? y dónde está tu mentalidá 'e tiburón garbage man???????? like i genuinely dont know at what fucking point garret ever realized he had to be a better person - like okay. sure. he does admit that hes trash as a person and that hes a loser. it never really felt like he internalized any of that admission as motivation to become a better human though???????????? the movie just gave him the happy ending with none of the work done 😭😭😭

it really felt like the second they introduced steve that they wanted to go to the climactic final battle against the piglins. with absolutely none of the work done to like, earn that final battle?? ESPECIALLY WITH ALL THE EMOTIONAL STUFF they were so focused on making each adventure scene fun that they forgot they wanted to give the moral lesson of staying true to yourself and not letting anyone take your creativity away, so they kinda just..... put it in there?? with none of the emotional labor of showing the characters journey through the problems of real life that would make such a lesson not just a fitting ending for the journey but also a necessary ending ever happening. whats up with that how did they do that

back to the characters - steve was actually funny and camp. no complaints there from me. OOOOOOOOO BUT THE WOMEN!!!! I HAVE SOOOOOO MANY PROBLEMS WITH THE WOMEN more accurately, i have problems with the fact that theres a total of FOUR. FOUR (4) WOMEN IN THE MOVIE, WHERE 2 OF THEM DO JACKSHIT FOR THE STORY (despite being iconic natalie and dawn never stop being you i love you idc that a whole theater worth of misogynists boo'd you once they dont know what fun is), ONE OF THEM IS BOTH THE VILLAIN AND NOT EVEN HUMAN (ily malgosha youre sooooo funny. i hope u get to stab steve in the afterlife babygirl <3) AND THE LAST ONE IS RELEGATED TO THE B-PLOT (marlene youre insane. i hope you have crazy fun with your nitwit villager husband <33) LIKE WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THAT????? HELLO????????????? genuinely sad. genuinely angering. they were all my favorites and if i see any one of you people calling them names or insulting them in any way ill kill you on sight <33 they did no wrong and deserve the world. fuck everyone else in the movie i only need natalie dawn malgosha and marlene in this life <3333

like GRGRGRGRGRGRGRRG i wanted to rip someone's throat out when i saw natalie and dawn doing nothing in that final battle against the piglinssss 😭😭😭 i mean. natalie kinda just... stood there. and dawn called the wolf army which disappeared off screen in like 37 seconds. they got done so dirtyyyyyyyy :(((((( im really really sad cuz both of them are sooooo interesting as characters!!!!!!! dawn is an overworked woman who's managed to keep her joy and whimsy with her about life even through the tiring responsibilites of being an adult! and natalie is a young woman recently moved into a new town where she knows no one and has custody of her younger brother due to their mother not being physically present!!!!! they couldve done something interesting with that!!!!!!!! make them bond over the fear of messing up and having those who rely on you judge you for that!! make dawn share some of her struggles she went through when she was natalies age and give her wisdom and advice!!!! instead we got a convo that barely showed a fraction of who these two are and what we couldve ahd, and the women are gone for all the ACTUALLY PLOT RELEVANT parts of the story after that. what if i tore the throat out of the writer who decided that. what if i did that.

like. i thought i would hate dawn and natalie from the trailer. i thought theyd be obnoxious and annoying. the instead i fucking love them and i wish they couldve had more involvement in the search for the earth crystal instead of Being Forced Apart from the group by The Narrative. the trailer paints them horribly

uhhhh tldr: the movie was fun. the story was shit. justice for natalie and dawn. marlene stole every scene in the movie and now i want a sequel just to see natalie dawn and marlene again,,,,,,,,,,

[nebulations]

Fish, 7 (For your prompts! ❤️)

Hi, anon!! Thank you for the prompt, you were the very first one to send one in! 7 was, again, the wildcard, so I randomly generated a different number to land on Yue Qingyuan (from Scum Villain)! I have no choice but to dedicate this to @bytedykes, because I told her about this prompt and she said “yqy pet fish mental health speedrun” and we went, uh, a little insane about it. Enjoy some yuefang, folks!!!!

“Mu-xiong,” Yue Qingyuan says. “I’m sorry to bother you. Are you available?”

“Yue-xiong is never a bother,” Mu Qingfang says warmly. “And I am, actually, yes. Is everything okay, Yue-xiong?”

“I think I need help.” A bit dramatic, perhaps, and Yue Qingyuan hates to trouble Mu Qingfang on a rare day off, but Yue Qingyuan and impulse have never been the best combination, and he would appreciate a second opinion.

Mu Qingfang’s voice turns hard. “Where are you? I'll come right away.”

“What—?” Yue Qingyuan stares at his phone like the blank call screen will tell him why Mu Qingfang suddenly sounds so serious. “I'm at home, but—”

“I'll be right there,” Mu Qingfang says, and hangs up.

Yue Qingyuan stares at his phone for another second, then lifts his gaze to his sparkling new aquarium. His new betta, white and black and resplendent of fin, stares back. Was his crisis of faith about his viability as a fish owner really so deserving of such urgency…?

—

“So,” Mu Qingfang says. “This was your emergency?” He looks about as unimpressed by the betta as it does by the two of them.

Yue Qingyuan feels obscurely like he’s being scolded. Mu Qingfang is one of the nicest men he knows, but that just means that his censure takes the form of a blunt instrument of mass disappointment.

“In my defense,” he points out meekly, “I didn’t say there was an emergency. Mu-xiong just assumed.”

“That’ll teach me,” Mu Qingfang huffs, but at least he looks amused. “Yue-xiong should get used to asking for help more so this gege doesn’t have to panic every time he does ask.”

Yue Qingyuan’s mouth almost drops open. He can only hope his cheeks aren’t as red as they feel. “Er—well, I asked this time, didn’t I?”

“You did,” Mu Qingfang allows, looking something horribly close to fond. Yue Qingyuan swallows and tries to hurry on.

“So—not an emergency, but I do want your opinion,” he coughs out. “I’m having… doubts. About the fish.” Mu Qingfang’s eyebrows contract. Yue Qingyuan rushes it out. “Do you think I should keep it?”

“Yue-xiong…” Mu Qingfang looks politely incredulous. “Why does my opinion matter? The fish is already yours, isn’t it? If you don’t think maintaining its upkeep will be feasible, that’s one thing, but… Surely Yue-xiong did the research before getting it?”

He doesn’t sound judgemental, but Yue Qingyuan feels his cheeks warm. “I did, but I wasn’t planning on getting a fish; I was only admiring the tanks. There was a salesperson who was… very insistent.”

Mu Qingfang regards him doubtfully, which is fair. Yue Qingyuan towers over most people he meets, and his bulk only further adds to the impression of immovability. It’s only when he opens his mouth that it becomes clear how spineless he actually is.

Yue Qingyuan falters. “I had thought… I thought it might be nice.” The bettas had seemed so majestic in their tanks, iridescent monarchs of false grass and plastic coves, and Yue Qingyuan had thought, wildly, that one might be rewarding to keep, might breathe a touch of life into his immaculately sleek living room. The whole affair hadn’t even been expensive by his shiny new standards, forget difficult to physically arrange. It was only when installation and set-up for his new aquarium had finished and he was left to watch that jewel-bright being swim disaffectedly through its new home that doubt had seized him, all-consuming and black. He had, admittedly, panicked a little after that.

(Yue Qingyuan’s apartment is very large, and very clean, and very empty. It holds the barest amount of decoration and muss to qualify as lived-in rather than a snapshot from a magazine ad. The fish may, in fact, be the only thing in the entire place which really qualifies as his. No wonder Yue Qingyuan wanted to jettison it from his life as soon as he got it.)

Mu Qingfang’s expression hovers between concern and simple confusion. “I’m sure Yue-xiong will be a more than adequate caretaker,” he says, more gently than Yue Qingyuan and all his neuroses probably deserve. “What’s this really about, Yue-xiong?”

Ah. There it is. Being the mildest person of Yue Qingyuan’s admittedly sharp-tongued social circle doesn’t preclude Mu Qingfang’s wit from being as keen as the scalpels he works with.

“I don’t…” Yue Qingyuan falters. How to express to Mu Qingfang how manifestly unfit Yue Qingyuan is to care for any living creature at all? He changes tack. “I think he hates me,” he admits dolefully.

Mu Qingfang stares at him for a long time, long enough to imply that he’s reevaluating certain opinions about Yue Qingyuan’s intelligence. “Yue-xiong, with all due respect to your new pet—it’s a fish.”

“Fish have emotions!” Yue Qingyuan argues. He flushes at the volume at which it comes out, and at the way Mu Qingfang’s eyes go wide-eyed in startlement. But the salesperson had been very insistent about that, as well. “Bettas are intelligent animals. They dislike certain colors, apparently, and they’re very sensitive—ah, to environmental disruptions, that is. And—”

Mu Qingfang’s eyebrows are still high, but his face has relaxed into a smile. “It sounds to me like you like it quite a bit already. Isn’t that reason enough to keep it?” His tone curls with sudden mischief. “Have heart, Yue-xiong—you’ve hardly known each other for a day! Give it time to adjust to you, and I’m sure you’ll win it over as surely as you do everyone else.” And he grins, sure and easy in his trust that Yue Qingyuan won’t fumble and shatter something so small and monumental as a life that he could cup in his palms.

While Yue Qingyuan is still dazed by that, Mu Qingfang’s eyes alight with interest. “Ah, Yue-xiong—what have you named it?”

“...”

Mu Qingfang’s face falls as devastatingly as it had lit up. “Yue-xiong…”

“Mu-xiong is aware that I was unsure of whether or not I’d keep him!” Yue Qingyuan is terribly aware that his ears are now heating up to match his cheeks. Mu Qingfang’s ensuing laughter does not help with that matter.

Yue Qingyuan is not very good at holding onto things. More often than not, he makes a mess of whatever he’s set his clumsy hands to, lets it fall right through his scarred fingers. But Mu Qingfang’s words ring through his head: Isn’t that reason enough to keep it? And, well, isn’t it? Surely Yue Qingyuan is adult enough to follow through on this. Maybe happiness can be look like his new betta swimming up to the tank to observe the new colorful form moving in front of it, can come as easy as Mu Qingfang quipping that his knowledge about fish is clearly lacking and vowing casually to read up on bettas to be a better fish uncle.

Yue Qingyuan buries a smile and walks over to let Mu Qingfang know that bettas can be trained to follow fingers around. The betta’s clear preference for Mu Qingfang over Yue Qingyuan is as good a marker of intelligence as any fun fact the pet shop worker could have given him. Yes, Yue Qingyuan thinks with a smile—he thinks he’ll be keeping this after all.

[rootbeerrex]

AND ALSO other side of paradise by glass animals for the jackbat song ask game

SANS UR INSANE FOR DOING THIS RIGHT AFTER GOLD RUSH I WAS HAVING FLUFF FEELINGS AND NOW???? also it's SO funny you picked this song bc fun fact there's currently an abstract piece for the other side of paradise sitting in my procreate files I have got it finish that one up sometime 💀

ok here's the deal. this one is. a lot harder. but also? I am an expert so I can do it. TW for. so much. brief mention of suicidal tendencies from bruce. fairly graphic description of the poisoning from the issues where Janet Drake dies. Also MCD.

opening lines:

oh this REEEEKS of a pre-batman au. @tangelotea has an AU for them where they met at boarding school and Bruce abandoned him to go train to batman so TBH I'm thinking I'll do something with not that exact au, but something similar where they met before batman. I think they were together in boarding school (when I was young and stupid) and after graduation, Bruce left to go train to be batman (my love left). obviously Jack doesn't know what he left for, so he fills it in with some abstract concept (to be a rock and roll star). He told Jack he was leaving and he couldn't tell him where he was going, but not to worry about him (he told me please don't worry). Bruce tries to make it as painless of a goodbye as possible, so he doesn't let himself show real raw emotions (wise little smile that spoke so safely). he left, and is not coming back to Jack (he booked a one way ticket). the next three lines don't fit so I'm not analyzing it bc it's MY ask game and I can do whatever I want <3

holy fuck I wrote so much for that last one ok speedrun this is basically Jack watching Bruce come back from his mysterious disappearance as Brucie Wayne, an airhead billionaire he doesn't recognize at all.

Jack tries to stay calm but his first love is standing right in front of him again and all the memories are rushing back but nothing lines up. he doesn't know what to do. he doesn't know what's happening.

BRUCE POV BRUCE POV BRUCE POV.

"bye bye baby blue" Bruce accepting that he's losing Jack all over again because Jack hates this new version of him (think like in the nolanverse his relationship with Rachel).

"I wish you could see the wicked truth" Bruce saying he wishes he could tell Jack the truth about why he was missing and what he's really like right now, but it's too dangerous (wicked truth).

"caught up in a rush it's killing you" welcome back suicidal adrenaline junkie bruce truthers!!!!

"screaming at the sun you blow into" could kinda be a Bruce always defying everything in nature thing but that's not important. what is important is

"curled up in a grip when we were us" Bruce remembering the way they held each other when they were togther

"fingers in a fist like you might run" now Bruce seeing the same hands that held him clenched angrily while Jack looks like he needs to just get away from Bruce.

"I settle for a ghost I never knew" back to Jack's POV, saying he'll just live with the memories of a man he clearly never knew, if this is who Bruce is now.

"superparadise I held onto" Jack always held onto the memories of their time together because it was paradise to him

"but I settle for a ghost" both of them saying they just have to live with the memories because the other one is out of reach now

Jack doing what's expected of him: marrying Janet, raising Tim, and having a "normal" life.

in my world Janet Jack and Bruce all knew each other in HS (Jack and Bruce weren't out) and Janet mentions once that she misses the old Bruce they used to know, and asks what happened because Bruce and Jack used to be close. Jack snaps back that it wasn't his fault, that Bruce just went crazy and is an attention seeker searching for the validation he wishes he could get from his parents. basically crazy defensive.

this part. is haiti. this is the kidnapping where Janet dies and Jack is paralyzed. the derealization stuff is the poison hitting his body and him not knowing what's happening. "that girl is gone but I / that girl is gone but I still try" Janet is dead but weaving in and out of consciousness he needs to save her still and it hits his head and he feels numb his body's looking wrong his body's looking wrong his body's looking wrong and

Batman shows up and saves him. (listen I know that's not how things happen in canon and that they got poisoned after batman showed up but SHUT UP I CAN DO WHAT I WANT)

"bye bye baby blue" Janet is dead and so is his. I don't wanna say innocence? because he's a grown man here but he is traumatized from this point on and baby blue is kind of like. it's the spirit of his "normal" life flying away with Janet. I'd say not to be pretentious but my whole brand is being pretentious so who cares 😭

ok from this point on its Bruce again. why does Bruce only get the chorus ? who knows but it's different this time so I'm still going through it

"I wish you could see the wicked truth" this is Bruce both saying he wishes he'd been able to see the water was poisoned so he could've protected them AND Bruce wishing in the back of his mind that Jack could recognize who he was behind the mask so he comfort the man he loves in his (possibly) dying moments

"caught up in a rush it's killing you" obviously the poison

"screaming at the sun you blow into" Jack is screaming about Janet's death and the pain and all that jazz

"curled up in a grip when we were us" Bruce grabbing Jack and trying to carry him away to get medical care, as a fun twisted parallel to holding him when they were together (we were us)

"fingers in a fist like you might run" Jack resisting Bruce and trying to stay with Janet's body

"I settle for a ghost I never knew" Bruce trying to remain objective and be batman here trying to tell himself to act like he doesn't know Janet and Jack so he can function objectively (this one is weak but also I'm pulling ALL of this out of thin air so I'm allowed to not have strong claims for all of them)

"superparadise I held onto" Bruce also always held onto the memories of Jack as paradise

"but I settle for a ghost" Jack dies in his arms and now he's truly left with only a ghost.

GOD THAT ONE WAS FUCKING HARD HOLY SHIT. but yeah this did remind me I have an entire series of abstracts I haven't finished yet based on this whole album I should work on those and post them LMAO. also yeah sorry for the ANGST it wasn't my CHOICE it's all SANS' fault so yell at her for giving me this song 😭😭😭

god this might be the messiest all over the place analysis I've ever done anyway bone apple teeth!

SHIT I ALMOST FORGOT EVERYONE GO VOTE FOR JACKBAT IN THE RAREPAIR TOURNAMENT

[lyss-sketchbox]

My thoughts on Inazuma vs Natlan so far. Is that Inazuma dropped the ball. There's no questioning that. It was rushed and the resolution lacked weight, and it almost definitely needed a lot more space to breathe and probably would've benefited from the 5 act structure instead of speedrunning with 3 acts (such as needing actual time spent with the Watatsumi Resistance rather than spending like 30 minutes tops).

HOWEVER. I feel like the initial Act I-II of Inazuma did a great job established the STAKES. It showed us the very real damage being caused by the various unjust decrees and why people are fighting. Natlan I kinda felt like did a lot of telling instead of showing, and any potential stakes feel kinda... Unserious? Because no one's really seriously hurt and even if they're saying Natlan will explode soon, I'm not really feeling like it's as dire as they're trying to sell it.

BUT IVE BEEN INFORMED YOU CAN DO NATLAN OUT OF ORDER??? Like you could in theory do Natlan BEFORE Inazuma thru Fontaine (with the quick-start function) which is why Natlan is more 'self-contained' which is absolutely insane to me?? Like HELLO???

Overall, I feel like the concepts and plot presented in Natlan is fine. But they didn't do a good enough job of selling to me these things. Like the whole child soldiers stuff kjadf like we actually dwelled on it for longer than a millisecond, we'd probably realize that's super fucked up!! But instead we gloss over it, making the whole quest seem fairly light-hearted despite everything.

Rubs my hands together ok anon lets talk cuz yeah i have thoughts

About inazuma

I definitely agree with you that Act 1-2 (especially 1) of inazuma did well setting up and showing how much negative impact the shogun's rule has impacted the people:

Vision holders literally losing a chunk of themselves (or worst, their lives) from their vision being confiscated.

Non-vision holders risking their lives for helping said vision holders (the resistance)

International traders being stuck in the nation, repressed by local government, and scammed by local traders just to keep business alive.

Local government bloating the price of everything!!! (And being able to get discounts only if you have connections)

Corruption even in the highest positions (gestures at the Kujou clan)

Fatui meddling that lead to the deaths of many for profit

The shogun literally programmed her robot to be that heartless because she herself dont give a shit about any of these issues. As long as her eternity stays.

Fr after venti and zhongli, getting an archon that acts as a proper ruler of a nation AND an antagonist sounds COOL AS FUCK. The booba sword scene while yeah, boobs wooo, also was a wonderful show of her authority over her nation.

After that they tripped and fell in Watatsumi. While i appreciate the environmental story telling of Watatsumi's and Shogunate's bases during the war, we barely get enough time to do... ANYTHING of substance. If i remember correctly, we became team captain, then do a bunch of training and defeating vagrants (on our own because friendly npc fighters didnt exist yet) and thats it. Where is the plotting? Wheres the planning? It was all just an anime training montage we barely get to see or feel. I genuinely feel like we couldve just replaced the entire Watatsumi arc with 'the fatui is selling delusions to people with confiscated visions to help them cope with the lost so traveller go to the delusion factory' and NOTHING wouldve changed. Hell it wouldve made ALOT more sense why yae came to save us at the end if the whole thing happened in Narukami.

Also after all that SHOWING they did alot more TELLING about wooo how smart kokomi is she is so smart and cool and the savior of the resistance. Like girl the fatui had their grip on your soldiers to the point they almost didnt want to surrender their delusions what are you on about. While you can argue she was only a priestess before the war and had no war intellegence skills, the people prop her up as such, kujou sara took her seriously. So she has to have some merit. Well im not seeing any (fight me on this i dont fully remember what happens in watatsumi)

Also at the end we fight the literal dictator of the nation with the power of friendship then everyone and i mean EVERYONE forgave said dictator...... cool. They would definitely benefit from an extra act so that watatsumi adds to the idea that this civil war and the shoguns current decree is causing damage.

About AR

The thing is that the requirements for you to start Natlan AQ is to be AR 28 and finish Liyue AQ (which requires AR 29 for the entire thing). While starting Inazuma requires AR 30, Sumeru needs AR 35, and Fontaine needs AR 40 (highest AR requirement by far).

Id argue that each nation is supposed to be a self-contained story. Even so, based on AR requirements theyve been chronologically in order because you NEED to complete the previous AQ to start the next. EXCEPT for Natlan.

While this is obviously to be more open to new and returning players, it really.... decreases the stakes, like you would assume the more we progress the tougher challenges we will have to face. But Natlan? Nawww you can go to Natlan without fighting the dictator 👍

About Natlan

I AM ADDRESSING THE CHILD SOLDIER THING FIRST BECAUSE YES. THEY DEFINITELY DID ALOT MORE TELLING THAN SHOWING HOW THIS CHILD APPARENTLY CAN BE SENT TO WAR WITH A REAL CHANCE OF DYING!!!!! I talked about this before because they ironically did alot more showing how child like Kachina is which adds more to the FUCKING CHILD SOLDIER THING.

HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BE OKAY WITH THIS??? Oh its our nations culture, its just the culture shock, OKAY YEAH BUT THE TRAVELLER AND PAIMON ARENT NATLAN NATIVES AND THEY DONT FEEL ANYTHING ABOUT THIS????? Wow yey cheer for the child to go to war! BRO SHE DIED AND WE WENT JACOOZIING WHILE WE WAIT FOR HER TO RETURN FROM WAR...............

ITS VERY OBVIOUS INFANTILIZATION BECAUSE IANSAN DIDNT FUCKING GET THE SAME TREATMENT. You know, the other small girl character there, nah she went to war just like Kachina, lived, and stood by the Archon and WAS READY TO THROW HANDS WITH A HARBINGER IF THE ARCHON DIDNT FUCKING FIGHT HIM HERSELF.

Everything just feels so.... chill? So relaxed with no stakes at all. I mean yeah the Abyss is creeping into the nation's roots but instead of sending armies we make it a tournament. Yeah people die in these excursions but we can revive them so we can ignore the horrors of experiencing death. Yeah the flames are dying so the archon has to give up some of her power to keep it lit but its okay! The harbinger is a gentleman that wont take this opportunity to do some scheming. We need the power of the chosen one of each tribes to save natlan but hey cant rush it! We got a year after all teehee.

Man. Head in hands. What the fuck.

Not even gonna go into the whole the archon is human but mavuika is the one that got reincarnated to retake the role just in time to solve a national crisis thing. Because i dont even know if THAT is accurate.

If they somehow trip and fall worse than inazuma id actually be amazed because the bar is very very low.

[review-anon]

Thoughts on Kokichi Ouma?

Oh boy. Kokichi.

He's a complicated mess as if you recall my tier list he's quite low down.

Yet characters of a similar archetype to him are way higher so what gives? Does he rub me the wrong way?

I'll explain Kokichi's...unusual tier placement soon but for now let's talk the easy stuff which is his character in the game.

When Kokichi was first revealed and everyone was fawning over him I wanted this guy to be a bastard. An complete and utter bastard that does something truly henious that nobody expect the kinnies will forgive him for.

So did I get what I want? Design wise he definitely looks insane as no normal person would wear a straightjacket. This has let to the fun theories he was an escaped mental asylum patient. And when the V3 fake spoilers were running around, fun times, they said he was part of a despair cult. Its certainly a unique look.

He's an absolute blast personality wise as he says the most outragious stuff and often riles the other characters. Saying Kiibo has a dick? Speedrunning Maki trying to kill him? And him messing with Shuichi?

The lying is something that you do need to read the lines between. Its not pathological lying as Kokichi would lie even when in situations its better for him to tell the truth, so its more like compulsive lying.

All of these are so much fun to watch and Derek Stephen Prince was a fanasatic VA as I could really hear the Digimon Emperor from his voice when doing Kokichi, and he delivers the lines and his vocal changes as Kokichi has one of the most dynamic vocal ranges. I was amazed he didn't have a second VA because some characters like Junko needed multiple VAs due to how wild the character was.

His actions are interesting to unpack because while he is a shit-stirrier like most rival characters, unlike say Byakuya and Nagito who are out for themselves, Kokichi has everyone's interests in mind but due to the nature of the Killing Game, he decided to play the villain someone for everyone to band against.

Problem is; this worked a little too well as everyone hated him and then after Chapter 4 which despite his bombastic display, he was definitely affected by, he decided to create a unsolvable murder case. Which got solved because gameplay.

Many more qualified people have done more in-depth analysis on why Kokichi is such a interesting character. In fact if it wasn't for the real reason he's so low, he would be around B/A tier.

So why is he so low? Well its not nothing to do with what Kokichi does in the games...but more of what he did to me. Putting this under the cut because its a very bonkers reason and I understand if you think this is a stupid reason and that is the reason why he isn't bottom tier.

For starters its got nothing to do with his lying. I've like liar characters like Nikei and David in the past so again the archetype isn't the reason. Its also got nothing to do with the fact he kills Miu and Gonta. I never liked Miu and yes Gonta dying is sad but its a Killing Game.

Its also got nothing to do with the fact he killed Kaito as yes the two bash heads a lot but its more to do with the secondary theme of emotions vs. logic rather then Kaito hates lying little shits.

And yes I did see thoses terrible YouTube videos which claims Kokichi is poorly written. That Youtuber is a terrible elitist analyst who clearly hates Kokichi as a character and is using smokescreens and the delusion they are more educated to persuade you otherwise. Its up there with the more terrible Game Theories.

Finally the Love Hotel scene is more on the tame side and its the sole reason why everyone and their mother makes Kokichi Joker whenever one does a Persona/Danganronpa crossover.

So if its got nothing to do with that then what gives? Why do I not like Kokichi? Is it to do with something personal?

Yes. Yes it is because during the entire year of 2017, I had to deal with a non-stop stream of lucid nightmares where Kokichi Ouma was a psychopathic yandere towards me. The entire thing was like a living A Nightmare on Elm Street and I still wonder to this day how tf it even happened in the first place. The dreams are like what I described them as; Kokichi was in love with me and wasn't gonna take no for a answer.

I'm normally lucid in my dreams so at first I just tried waking up early, but to my horror I would later learn that Kokichi himself was fully aware he was in my mind and every time I end a session prematurely while he couldn't obviously stop me, he could punish me next time I go to sleep since you know humans need sleep, and would use every dream mechanic you could think of to trap me.

These dreams completely fucked up my sleep schedule as I would often get 4-5 hour sleeps because of them, and while normally when I wake up in the night I would go back to sleep, to do that would mean more Kokichi and more horrors so I would often stay up at like 4am.

I studied as much dream theory as I could and tried all the tactics I could find to make these stop, but nothing worked and Kokichi would often mock me when I did so.

Clearly I don't suffer them now so how did I get rid of him in the end? Well I won't disclose how I did it but let's just say look at how Bill Cipher in Gravity Falls was killed and that should give you a good idea how I managed to get rid of that Kokichi in the end. Expect of course I didn't lose my memories.

Don't ask me how this happened, because I don't know either. As while I do have wild dreams I had nothing on that magnitude before or since then. The dreams had two lasting effects on me. Firstly, its made me scared of Doki Doki Literature Club as while Monika is a million times tamer then my psychotic Kokichi was, its still too close to home for me.

And the second is that its given me a bit of a sour opinion on Kokichi. Not because the character sucks but because its very hard to look at a character when something wearing their face and behaving almost exactly like them, was your personal Freddy Krueger for a little over a year.

TL;DR Kokichi is a good character and under normal circumstances I would have loved him but my brain decided that it was illegal and gave me lucid nightmares about him for over a year and that's made me hard to like him.

[kalied0skull]

I'm so sorry to tell you this but you lost the game

inbox speedrunning

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Coming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Can you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah!

Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive City graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick our job today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Catches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Can anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make.

I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Check it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can't just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it.

[tubchunk]

me spitting out all my thoughts here as i watch tubbo's vod

"YEP innocent" "innocent to me" yeah like qtubbo doesnt give a shit if fred is bad, he will burn it all down to find her

"its time for me to step into the sun, you know? and who cares if everyone else burns?" HOLY FUCKKKKKKKK TUBBO??????

"this is more than a villain arc, this is a lifestyle adjustment" oh qtubbo you are going to fly so close to the sun and youre going to burn and i am here for it all

"you wrong me? you're not gonna be around to tell the tale" HES SODHDJDBFBFJ QTUBBO ENJOYERS WE ARE SO BACK

"this is not a story of villains and heroes, this is a story of revenge" WHAT WAS IN HIS FOOD TODAY WHAT WAS HE ONNNNN LINE AFTER LINE IS HITTING

qtubbo knowing the server underestimates him and is now ready to show what he really is capable of YOU GO BABYGIRL

"this is a conflict where there arr no winners, just mutually-ensured destruction" goddamn he is on it today

GIRL 26 STACKS OF TNT?????????

"anything to get the upper hand, am i right?" AND THEN MENTIONING THE FED OFFICE WARP PLATE IS ACTIVE OH MY GODDDDDDD FED QTUBBO ERA????

"in my own experience, the members of the islandhave been much worse to me than the federation ever has been" oh my gOD YES QTUBBO FEELING THE FED PUNISHMENTS ARE STILL "JUSTIFIED" CUZ THERE WERE RULES BROKEN BUT THE ISLANDERS HAVE BEEN POKING AT HIM FOR THINGS HE CONSIDERS UNNECESSARY OH VILLAIN ARC TIME IS REALLLL

HE CALLED FRED "THE ONE PERSON I CARE ABOUT ON THIS SERVER" IM SICK TO MY STOMACHDBDBFGBDBFJFJ

qtubbo deciding that morning crew doesnt need to know about what hes gonna do, cuz theyll always be his boys :(

"i think we show them a healthy does of regret" his qcellbit is coming out !!

just imagining qtubbo with his airpods in as he is dramatic, bumping classical music

"the suit stays on until he's found, safe and alive" thr fact that qtubbo does all this, still in thr suit for his date GOD its so sad

that post that said qtubbo, a machine guy, tearinf every block down by HAND is important cuz that shows how genuinely furious he is. cuz he needed to feel the catharsis of tearing it all down himself.

why did he research warp plate mods to figure out where fred is😭😭 gay love stories are getting out of hand

"i made a promise today. i said i would break every block he has ever placed. *i* will break. fire wont break. tnt wont break. *i* will break." holy fucking shittttttttt he got possessed by qtubbo

FIT LMAOOOOO

qfit noticing and asking why qtubbo was at quackity's but as qtubbo askes him to leave him be, he did. he knew qtubbo would come to him when he wanted to.

COY PISO INTERMISSION!!!

qtubbo's action plan just being pushing qquackity over the edge that is so fucked up and i am here for this downward spiral !!

"i could mentally destroy him until hes a quivering ball of tears and regret on the floor" HOLY FUCK???????

"youre trying to turn me against the federation while actively doing thr same exact thing they're doing, the fucking hypocrisy" GOD i think qquackity is justified in his reasons BUT QTUBBO ISNT WRONG HERE!!!! IN HIS EYES, WHY WOULD YOU SAY THEYRE BAD AND THEN DO THR SAME THINF AS THEM???

him still saving all the stuff qquackity got from the eggs and others cuz "those seem important" GOD

"he doesnt need a hoise, cuz home is where the heart is. and i feel like thats a lesson he ought to learn. too bad that his is dead and cold" QTUBBO HOLY?????

"its like you never existed at all. thats my mission" girl youre speedrunning that descent into insanity and evil and i love you for it

"youre crazy. maybe i am! i dont give a shit!" wow hes so aware

"i didnt have a purpose before. but now its to make sure quackity never has a mark on this server" he didnt have a purpose and now, after losing fred, his purpose is to make qq pay holyyyy

"i never said i was morally grey, i said i would fuck up all his shit" LETSGO BABYGIRL

HIM GOING TO THE FED OFFICE TO PoSSIBLY SNITCH, CUZ THE ENEMY OF HIS ENEMY IS HIS FRIEND

NOT THE SERVER RESTART STOPPING HIM LMAOOOO

him literally saying he doesnt care and the enemy of his enemy is his friend yoo

qtubbo not being silly and walking into fred's office and just quietly moving on STOPPPPPP

NOT THE LORE SPOILERSSSSS LMAO

RETURN OF CUCURUCHO OFFICE PODCASTTTTTTTTT

"if youve become as bad as the thing you are trying to destroy to destroy it, yourr not better. youre just a replacement" BARS 🔥🔥🔥

qtubbo's voice instantly softening looking at fred's office and the desk plant he got STOPPPPP THEY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME

him replacing the flower on fred's desk with a poppy :(((

QTUBBO REPLACING THE WARP AT HIS HOUSE TO THE FED OFFICE OH I CAN FEEL HOW THIS GOES DOWNHILL

"why do i bother making anything to help the server? this is the thanks i get" oh yeah he is fully turning against everyone soon

oh god convo with qfit

oh i know qfit is concerned hearing qtubbo talk this way but theres nothing he can do to make him change his mind, so he just stays by him

"just to watch him. not say a word. just watch him" WATCHER QTUBBO??????

oh qtubbo is actuslly scaring me rn

"theres an old sayinf that 'if youre on the quest for revenge, dig two graves" "thats alright. i dont care if i burn as long as he does as well. maybe ill dig 3 graves. maybe ill take some other people along with me on the way" HOLY FUCKCJDJFJDJFJFJDJFJ QTUBBO YOURE INSANE I LOVE YOU SO BAD

"so i take there was no date?" "i was invited on one. it was real to me" GODJDDHFB IM GONNA END IT ALL

qfit still reassuring qtubbo that fred is okay, he still cares for qtubbo so much thats someone he has grown to care for

TUBBO SHOWING FIT WHAT HE DID TO QUACKITY'S HOUSE AND SAYING "like i said. like he never existed" AND THEN JUST BOUNCED????? GIRL.

qtubbo gaslight gatekeep girlboss

"is it more satisfying to destroy a person. or watch them destroy themselves?" AND WE ARR WATCHING AS QTUBBO ALSO DESTROYS HIMSELF BIT BY BIT OOOOOOOOH

his ass spoiling stuff again😭😭

snack break!

PHIL HOUSE TIME

qtubbo instantly leaving when he sees quackity joined and fred joined god

the curse of bad nees bringer tubbo about to strike again with wilbur LMAO

distracted to spy on wilbur so real

QUIRKYDUOOOOOO

qtubbo just carrying thr flower from fred's office in his offhand im sick

qtubbo warning qpac that he may hear some stuff about him that isnt true i. coming weeks, and qpac saying he trusts qtubbo 100% MORNING CREW MY FAMILYYYYYYY

PAC MY BELOVEDDDDD

not pac and tubbo arguing over who has to break the news to wilbur lmaoooooo

qtubbo qquackity's biggest hater rn

damn im sad tubbo crashed before the event but that laptop was hanging by a THREAD

[scifirice]

The game Doomed in danny phantom has insane implications.

Before you go typing stuff, I am aware it's the result of needing a video game to have stakes and the writers needing a plot. I understand watsonian and doylist reasoning, im a writer myself. this is purely for the in-universe implications which I believe are crazy.

In episode 12: Teacher of the Year, danny and his friends are playing some kind of online game where the grand prize for beating it is full access to the World Wide Web. I re watched this episode prior to writing this, though it has been a hot minute since ive seen the other episodes, so i don't know exactly if they've actually used the internet prior to that episode. But i do remember technus escaping because Danny deleted his old save of Doomed so i guess that does imply he beat it at some point after episode 12.

The mere fact they can even play an online game in the first place would imply they have some access but not as much as they could. Kind of like how when you have a learners permit you can only drive in the daytime with an adult in the passenger seat. Can you imagine getting online and only being able to access wikipedia and facebook? Thats what I'm seeing from this.

So as far as we know, anyone who wants to get full access to the internet has to play and beat this game. We see danny and tucker make it to the final level multiple times, it takes them all night but that assumes even an average player can make it far if they keep at it. So the game itself couldn't be too difficult.

But what bewilders me the most is what Sam's doing. Why does this game have PVP? Sam hasn't beat the game either, she was likely doing it just to fuck with danny and tucker but she also blasts some random dude at the beginning. The trio seemed to all be able to win the game together at the very end, meaning there isn't any actual reason for pvp since there's no need to claim the prize solely for yourself.

Then there's Lancer. He's already beating the goddamn game! Yet he comes back just to beat it again and fight people! Is he gaining anything from this? Probably not. But why would this be an option for returning players? It's like someone who gets a doctorate degree and then goes around a middle school with a baseball bat bashing any student they see trying to learn and the school staff do nothing about it.

Why is the world set up like this? Did the government decide full internet access is something someone should have to take a test for? Did everyone have to take the test or were they grandfathered into keeping full access? I dunno how old Lancer is but unless we assume he was only playing the game for fun, he had to have beat Doomed when he was younger. so that implies his generation and the one after were all subject to this rule.

Is Doomed the only game like this? are there other games for other kinds of people since not everyone is good at FPS games? Could there be other things like make a character on the sims live for a whole year on max difficulty and then you win? Beat halo on legendary with all skulls on? speedrun mario 64 below the allowed time limit? Whose idea was this!? Not everyone is going to want full access when they're teens like danny, but what about when you get a job? Do you need to put "I beat Doomed" on your resume? this whole this is just fucking bizzare,

It's a minor detail never really brought up again, but the wider implications of it are immense. Anyway, im using this episode as inspiration to write a story because I cannot let this idea just get swept under the ecto-rug.

[thecircularsystem]

Take 2: Take on Sysmed

I wrote up an entire post (well, half of a post, but it was already over 1k words) on this topic, but that isn't going to be seeing the light of day. Off to the private blog it goes.

Take two. Sorry if my words are a bit disorganized; this is a really... really personal topic for me, and to see it brought up as it is has been hard. I need to get some sort of words out there or I think I'll go insane.

Genuine TL;DR: I used to go by the label pro-endo sysmed. It was stupid, but there were a lot of reasons -- the biggest because I needed to claim some sort of control over the fact that everyone hated me, and at least if I was a bigot, it gave them a reason to hate me. I discuss my experience with kink at pride discourse and how gentle teaching changed my perspectives, but "treating the bigot like the bigot they were" was just triggering and didn't help at all. Lastly, I talk about shame and how the term "sysmed" is largely (if it's ever really used for "activism" at all) attempting to teach through shame, which isn't effective. There's also a bonus screenshot at the end of the spark of this discussion from discord.

Not very long ago, though it feels like eons now, I identified "proudly" as a pro-endo sysmed. I recall saying some bullshit about how it was "reclaiming an insult that was used against me," but I was in denial. Hardcore, heavily traumatized denial.

I was just trying to claim the ostracization as something that was my choice, instead of everyone else's.

It was prideful, foolish, and hurtful, and I still stay up at night thinking about how fucking stupid I was. I've had to do a lot of therapy to look at my younger self and not hate him for who I am now, but moreso, who I was then.

Because with everything in my life, it was what I needed. It was all I had.

...

When I first returned to the pro-endo community, I was met completely with scorn, hatred, and distrust. It's hard to sort out the memories now -- more and more signs that it was heavily traumatic for me -- but I remember a little. "The Respectability Politics Syscourser" who sucked anti-endo dick and licked their boots, apparently. I'm sorry that the first person who validated my struggles -- who treated me like a disordered system in need of medical help -- was an anti-endo. I didn't agree with his beliefs. Not at all! I fucking hated him, honestly, I felt disgusted at having to "play along with the enemy."

I even joined a server, which I later called home and formed an (unhealthy) attachment to, just to "speedrun getting banned" from an anti-endo server. I did this more than once.

I was pro-endo, through and through. And yet...

I was frequently met with the term sysmed, online, despite my pro-endo beliefs. I was harassed for being friends with anti-endos, because "they're the bad guys." I was told that I needed to "look to myself for why I was being harassed" when I explained to a user, with screenshots, exactly who was harassing me and what had been said (slurs and suicide bait, 17 times in a row iirc, across a single day). I was told repeatedly that it was what would happen, since I allowed anti-endos to interact with me, because once an anti-endo, always an anti-endo.

Once a bigot, always a bigot.

...

Each time it happened, I was brought back to my middle and high school years. Literally -- flashbacks are a bitch.

I was raised a Republican. I finally, finally changed my voter registration this year, after being forced into selecting R as a child. I was raised racist, homophobic, transphobic -- any form of bigotry, and I probably was raised with it. I went into detail in my first draft, but genuinely... I don't even know how worth it it is to try to explain to you all how absolutely alienating it is to be everything you were raised to despise, fear, and pray for salvation for.

And the online community didn't fucking make that easier. (In all honesty, neither did the offline communities I was in, but again, the trauma dumping needs to be held back with a goddamn knife at this point).

When I first started saying my opinions online, I received harassment for my bigotry. "STFU Terf." "Christians DNI get the fuck off my post." Nothing as horrific as what I've experienced in my time as a syscourser, but I witnessed far, far worse from far more outspoken individuals. I didn't say much about my bigotry online, as I had already learned, by that point, that every single word out of my mouth was clearly the wrong words, and that I was just a stupid, horrible person for ever believing anything.

And online spaces reinforced these disordered beliefs.

I think the example that stands out the most (and forgive the 18+ content here, but this goes on the main blog for once, I just need this out-) was when I got into Kink at Pride discourse. I was horrified by the idea of kink at pride, as someone who experienced absolutely horrific abuse from kink shit. I couldn't imagine someone in a leather mask at pride because of my trauma. I couldn't... Ah, knife point again, trauma dumping.

Anyways. I went on an entire rant online about it. About how people have triggers, etc etc.

I was met with slurs, harassment, and people spamming my DMs so much with explicit BDSM that I still, to this day, struggle to DM over tumblr with anyone other than my now spouse.

So I went to my friends, complaining about it. Because this just reinforced my beliefs. This reinforced for me that KAP was a bad idea, because all the people who believed it insulted me, harassed me, and triggered me. Clearly, they're the bad guys, right?

I am still so, so grateful for the friend I had at the time who (incredibly gently, incredibly carefully, understanding before I even did just how traumatized I was) explained how kink belonged at pride, and the historical precedent for it, and everything. And I think the most important thing out of that conversation was where they said it's okay that I was wrong.

IT'S OKAY THAT I WAS WRONG.

Just thinking about that moment makes me cry again. It was okay to be wrong. It was safe to be -- yes -- the bigot in the situation. Because I was! I can recognize that now! But at the time, all I could realize by the end of the conversation was that I had been wrong, and it was absolutely fucking shit-myself-levels of terrifying.

Being wrong isn't safe. Being wrong means I deserved it.

I deserved the harassment. I deserved the hatred. I deserved the pain, and misery, and I deserved the triggers that fed on my SA, and I deserved to be punished.

Because I was a bigot.

But they showed me I didn't deserve pain and insults and hatred just because I didn't know. Just because I couldn't know, until someone taught me the way I needed to be taught.

They took the time to figure out how to tell me the information -- which strangers online had not done -- and they gave me what I needed. They didn't insult me. They didn't fucking crucify me for what I had said.

They weren't polite or sugarcoating, either. They were gentle, but blunt. Firm and kind.

And, because of that, overnight I became less homophobic and less transphobic. I made public posts about it. I was thrilled, at the time, when even a single ounce of praise came down the anonymous inbox.

"I'm glad you're not a stupid bigot anymore."

...

I look at syscourse in the tags.

"I'm not here to make bigots comfortable."

Cool. They'll keep being bigots then.

"I shouldn't have to be polite to people who don't believe in my existence!"

Cool. They'll keep being bigots then.

"If you support sysmeds, you're supporting sysmed rhetoric. If you let one Nazi at the bar, it's a Nazi bar."

Cool antisemitism. They'll keep being bigots then.

If all of your activism for plural rights begins and ends at the word sysmed, you aren't doing anything to combat sysmedical beliefs. You're just keeping the bigots angry.

...

Not long ago, I used the term sysmed for myself. I still look back with disgust at my prior self, and force myself to love him for what he survived, how he did it, even if it was "wrong." Even if we're still "the bad guy" because we love our past self, because we fought to survive and change. Because we had once been bigoted, but we didn't hold that against us.

I still look back at messages sent in a plural server I'm in about how "I honestly both wanna try to figure out what makes them tick and also wanna run in the opposite direction of them" and how they would like to preemptively kick me from their server since I was "so confusing." I doubt that individual remembers saying it, and I don't hold it against them. I would be uncomfortable around me too.

I just also have my own shoes to wear, and my own perspective to see, and looking back now, I know why I used that term. It wasn't... fucking reclaiming, or whatever I said to myself to live in mental health hell denial for a little bit longer.

It was so that, since nobody gave a single fucking shit about me, at least I knew the reason why.

Because I was a bigot. And I deserved every ounce of hate I got.

Right?

...

So, my thoughts on sysmed, and hopefully this'll be the last time I mention this.

The term, as it is used currently in the community, forces those with bigoted mentalities -- mentalities they may or may not even be aware of being bigoted -- to remain bigoted. It slots people into The Bad Guy role effortlessly, allowing people to dehumanize bigotry when the source of bigotry is how people treat others. Dehumanizing bigotry only encourages the spread of it.

I think there are times in discussions where it's used properly. I've seen sysmed used to genuinely discuss an individual's beliefs and how they were, specifically, medicalizing all of the varied forms of systemhood/plurality/multiplicity, and how that was wrong. It's so, so rarely, but I've seen it. I've even used the term in discussion before, though sparingly, as I rarely find use for it in discussion.

But 99.99 times out of 100, it is used to insult someone else.

...

I'm a teacher. I don't know about you, but I never learned -- and I absolutely do not fucking teach -- through shame.

And the term sysmed only shames people into doing what you want them to.

If you want people to learn -- to grow -- then you have to fucking work for it. Not rely on a catchy term.

...

(Below, I'm going to include a screenshot from a discussion I had about this in another server. For context, I had just said that I also feel a lot of discomfort for the terms TERF and transmed. I couldn't find a good way to squeeze in this part of the discussion, so have a bonus.)

[isabellaofparma]

omg your comment about john being a dick but not in a fun way is one of my main problems w this storyline, it’s as if the producers/writers were like ‘oh well robert was a dick and aaron fell for him so let’s just do that again’ but robert was playful!!! he was charming!!! also i think robert had a certain vulnerability about him from the start that i think helped draw aaron in, like outright admitting that he faked his car breaking down to get aaron to come and his soft ‘i’m not messing you around’ to stop aaron from leaving. john is literally just a prick to aaron and takes himself too seriously there’s no reason why that would attract aaron to him lmao

Yeah! Plus Aaron thought Robert was struggling with his sexuality (which he was, but not the way Aaron'd thought) so he forgave him a lot for that. I'm sure John has some issues that make him act the way he does but I'm pretty sure Aaron doesn't even suspect that, he is just like 'What a dick. I can't not fuck him' which okay, lust exists, being horny exists but you need insane amout of chemistry for that to work and more goddamn screentime! But like I said, they seem to be speedrunning through this whole thing so no time for that. And you know, all of this could still work if they leaned into the Robert angle. If they said 'Aaron misses Robert so much he will take any crumbs that's a reminder of him' and that's why they keep giving them these knock off affair scenes but no, Robert is only present at the bare minimum. I don't understand why the Sugden connection was necessary if they don't really want to use it (regarding Aaron, at least). Someone mentioned John could have been Eric's relative, still have a connection to the village, be a dick and hook up with Aaron. Not much would have changed.