#WHAT THE FANFIC WRITER DELETED ALL THEIR NOTES FROM MY POSTS

[unamazing-sheep21]

*throws up blood*

Um so. More The Killer fanart because my brain won’t let me go on this one.

Also, in celebration of @the-west-meadow ‘s fic about them updating soon I drew this because I truly can’t wait AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA the sillies

( the Smiths Lyric is changed on purpose btw)

also extra funny thing I came up with:

The Killer’s arch nemesis: The Lifer ( it’s just his evil doppelgänger)

[savannahsdeath]

hiii I love your work! could you pretty please do some toxic ellie? :)

TOXIC!ELLIE WILLIAMS X READER

mdni please<3

summary: a miserable attempt to leave your toxic girlfriend

warnings: preferably 18+, just lots of toxic shit, manipulating, reader is crying

writers note: probably the only toxic post you'll see on my profile. honestly, i dont even know why i wrote this and im posting it just for the anon. i dont support any toxic behavior, cuz even a simple fanfic can bring some harm. dont read it if youre sensitive to such topics and if you decide to read it, dont romanticize it and dont blame me for any bad feelings you felt while reading - youre responsible for your own media consumption, im not forcing anyone to read. as i said, i just post it for the anon and also because i dont want it to just sit in my drafts (i dont have the guts to delete it). ugh its kinda long but i just want to make sure everyones safe, please take care🩷

you were sitting in your bed with your head buried between your knees for half an hour now, ignoring the buzzing of your phone. you caught her with another girl. you should cry and feel miserable, and all you could think of was; 'finally! finally a reason to leave her!!'. all you could feel was happiness.

but leaving her wasn't easy. you tried a few times before.

'maybe it'll be different this time', you hoped. but the way you kept receiving notifications from her said otherwise. 'maybe if i ignore her for a few more minutes, she'll let me go.'

you tried to put your phone down, but your hands won't let you. your thumbs kept reaching for the screen in a desperate, involuntary action. you were powerless to stop it. you knew you shouldn't respond. you know you should walk away, but you couldn't. every time she messaged you, your heart beated faster and your breathing quickened. you knew this isn't the best thing for you, but a part of you was still clinging to hope.

'enough, stop it.' you ordered to yourself.

you picked up your phone, deciding to call your friend. she'll make you remember all the cruel things ellie did and leaving her will be easier.

your hands were shaking and you were truly scared of what's going to happen. you hestitated for too long before clicking on your friend's profile and.. lost your chance.

ellie was calling you. she wasn't giving up and she was probably pissed off by now.

you sighed and whispered; 'sorry' to your future self, before answering the call.

"why aren't you answering to my texts, huh?" she asked in an accusatory tone, as if you were the one who did something wrong.

your breath hitched as you heard her voice. there's no going back now. "i'm sorry, ellie, it's over." you mumbled and shook your head in disbelief. 'i'm sorry'?? for what? where was your confidence?

she took it from you, just like she's going to take anything she wants.

"i'll pick you up in a few minutes." she announced and you felt tears starting to well up in your eyes.

great. so she's on her way here.

you took a deep breath to stop your voice from quivering. "i'm not going anywhere- not with you."

ellie laughed, thinking it's all a joke. "you're funny, honey. you know you come crawling back to me everytime." she replies calmly. "so get ready. i'm coming to pick you up, and then we can talk about this. like grown-ups."

ellie was good at controlling you. she'll say she's coming to pick you up, and you'll be waiting on your porch when she arrives. she had a firm grip on you and she knew it.

not this time.

"like grown-ups?" you nervously laughed. "you cheated on me. again."

ellie didn't get angry. she wasn't even surprised.

"don't overreact, babe." she replied in an irritated tone. "it's not like it was anything serious. it's just some random girl. i'm still with you. you should know that."

you were stunned by her cavalier attitude. she really thought it's no big deal.

"leave me alone." if there was even a little bit of toughness in your voice before, it all left. now, you were just simply begging her to stop. "please."

ellie's confidence and her nonchalant attitude was getting to you. you felt angry, but at the same time, you were starting to doubt yourself.

you wanted to hang up, but you couldn't. you just waited for her reaction, praying this'll be the end. but you knew everything depended on what ellie wants, and for her, only her own good mattered.

ellie chuckled. "oh, sweetheart. you think you can just break up with me over the phone? we're not even having a fight here. come on, be reasonable. let's just talk this through. i'll be there soon."

you proudly raised your chin, even though she couldn't see that. the tears ruined your confident facade anyway. "i locked the door."

she stayed silent for a moment, not expecting that from you. but she always had a plan b, and you realised that as soon as you heard her laugh. "i'll check that myself."

you heard her car arrive outside your house, and an instant wave of regret washed over you.

she knocked on the front door. "i'm here, love. open up." her voice was gentle, with an apologetic tone.

you knew it was all a ploy to get you to open the door. you knew this was just another manipulative tactic she was using, but it was starting to work.

"come on, be a smart girl." she continued in a sweet voice. "or we'll do this the hard way."

you cursed yourself for how weak you felt, even though it wasn't your fault.

"ellie, please..." you begged, with as much authority as you could muster, but your pleads still sounded weak.

"what's that, babe? are you crying?" she responded in a mocking tone.

you felt powerless to resist her. your stomach twisted in knots, but your fingers reached for the knob. your other hand quickly wiped away your tears, though there were some visible smudges left. you stared at the doorknob in your hand, fighting every instinct in your body to open it and let her in. but you knew she'll get her way, sooner or later. you just wanted to get this over with.

with a shaking hand, you opened the door. you saw that ellie was holding a set of keys - there was definitely one to your house too. she could just unlock the door, but she wanted to check if you'll listen to her. you didn't even want to think about what would happen if you didn't give up.

she walked inside like she owned the place, and she didn't even look at you. she knew she's got you wrapped around her finger.

"good girl." she said, with the same mocking tone.

ellie's eyes darted around the room, and she walked over to take a closer look at a framed photo of the two of you on your shelf. she smirked, letting out a sarcastic 'hmph, so cute'.

you stood there, defeated, as she walked past you and paced around your home. she made herself comfortable, as if she belongs there. you tried to keep a brave face, but she could see right through it.

she sat down and turned to you. "tell me, why we ended up here?" she asked, her voice was cold and unforgiving, but it also sounded curious. "why are you trying to leave me? aren't you happy?"

you felt your lips tremble, as you parted them to speak. "you know damn well what you did."

she stood up and walked up to you, standing right in your face and leaning a little to match your eye level. "fucked another girl? huh? is that it?" she stroked your cheek with the back of her fingers, mocking your pout.

you flinched away from her touch, but she grabbed your face with both hands and pulled you towards her.

"i just had some fun." she said calmly. "besides, you can't blame me for wanting something different. just trying to make up for what you lack." she caressed your face, tracing your lips. it was almost gentle, as if she wasn't even trying to hurt you. but her words cut deep. "now, stop acting like a baby." she let go of your face. "i'm trying to have a mature conversation with you."

the obedient, scared side of you wiped your tears away and straightened up without thinking, but everytime you closed your eyes - everytime you blinked - another wave of salty liquid streamed down your cheeks.

you sniffled and tried to keep it together, but your body was shaking and feeling dizzy. still, you stood your ground.

"please, ellie... i can't do this anymore." you begged in a shaky voice.

"sh, shhh..." ellie wrapped her hands around you, rubbing your hair in a soothing motion. "don't say dumb things. i already know you can't live without me. you know that too." she grabbed you by the shoulders and forced you to look at her for a second. "don't you?"

her embrace felt somehow comforting, not matching the poisoning effect of her words. you clinged onto her, hoping to get as much from this rare moment as possible.

but you knew, deep down, that this is just another manipulation tactic. you shouldn't fall for her games.

"there, there." she whispered to you. she held you even tighter, as if she was trying to absorb every ounce of energy you had left.

she pulled back and looked you straight in the eyes. "do you see what happens when you try to leave me, babe?"

"i am leaving you." you said with as much conviction as you could muster. "i'm serious this time."

but ellie just smiled, treating your words like a joke. "that's funny, honey. this is just another one of your little tantrums. you're just upset because you haven't gotten enough attention these days. but you don't want to lose me." she ran her hands along your cheeks and caressed your hair. "you'll come back to me. you'll come crawling back, just like always. because you can't live without me."

you instantly buried your face in her chest, as she started stroking your back.

she sighed. "are you finished?"

you felt ashamed. you failed, once again. you let her win.

you lifted your head up so you could see her expression. her smile was even more mocking and cruel now that you've given in to her.

"that's more like it, babe." she said with that same condescending tone. she pulled you in for another hug, as if nothing happened. "now, let's forget all about today, okay?" she whispered in your ear. "my pretty girl."

[binnieceo]

Hello, kind strangers on the internet!

Oh, wow! Discord drama, huh? I never thought I'd be in the center of it all. Well, since she has shared her side of the story, it's only fair that I share mine.

So, if you aren't chronically online, allow me to explain: A teenager by the name of Tori (or Six) is accusing me of grooming her which is SO far from the truth that it is not even in the same plane of existence as the truth to begin with.

Some screenshots have been lost to time and I only have word of mouth to back me up, so you guys will have to just believe my (and others') words.

"Why?"

I don't screenshot every person and conversation I have. Tori keeps changing her profile, aliases, etc, so the things she's said and done a year ago have been lost.

Certain servers were deleted. Most of the bad stuff Tori said was on a server I made (which I will get into later) that was also later deleted. I only have a few screenshots from the server and most of them are EXTREMELY pixelated and low quality, so I'm sorry about that.

Most of our interactions pre-discord were on Twitter. And not only was Twitter banned in my country, but both me and Tori deleted our accounts.

"Why did you delete your twitter??? Are you sus??"

No actually. I was just getting bombarded with negativity from Twitter so I deleted my acc for the sake of my mental health. Tori wiped her Twitter (idk how? maybe she used bots) because she said she wanted to repurpose her account into a study account, which is fine.

Okay, so, starting:

First things first, I was 17 when I first met Tori back in April 2023. But I think I was 16 when we first interacted, because I have memory of interacting with her in the HJ server before I had my birthday.

She proceeded to DM me on Discord and I scrolled through all our convos and there really isn't anything worth noting there. We didn't talk much in DMs at all. There is just friendly talks about how our day went and how much we appreciated each other, so I'm not gonna put any of those here, because they are irrelevant.

Tori, at the time, asked me to DM a friend of hers (who was in the HJ server) and tell her that she wanted to end the friendship. I was confused but also didn't know how to say "no" at the time, so I just did what she asked and she seemed happy.

At some point, we started talking about fanfiction. We didn't talk about anything bad, just how much Tori liked my work and enjoyed being my friend. Later, she gave me her Twitter @ and that was the first time I saw her posting about NSFW.

She re-tweeted and followed NUMEROUS NSFW artists/fanfic writers (mostly Tower of God and Kimetsu no Yaiba) and made her own posts talking about it, mostly about just how much she wanted to rape Gyuu (a KNY character). Again, I literally don't have access to Twitter anymore + Tori WIPED her account, so even if you follow her, you won't be able to find anything like this there.

I didn't think too much of this at the time. It was just fanfiction, nothing more, nothing less. And yeah did she tell me she was 17 and not 18? Yeah but like. Teenagers are going to teenage and interact with porn anyway so I was like "this is fine" (it wasn't)

Then, at some point, someone in the HJ server brought up that they were 13 and I promptly banned them (the rules state that those below 16 cannot join). Which prompted Tori to send me the above message.

And this is where I made a grave mistake: I kept talking to her despite it all.

To be completely honest, I was feeling extremely awkward and confused when she first sent me that message, and just wanted to calm her down because I had the impression she was really shaken up by what happened.

"But why did you keep talking to her??"

I kept talking to her out of pity. She often vented to me and the others about how bad her life IRL was, how her friends irl treated her badly and how much she hated it all. I felt like I owed her my friendship because I was the one who messaged her ex-friend some time earlier, making her feel alone. So, I kept talking to her.

I'd also like to note that those were some of the last few messages we exchanged in DMs (the last were something abt Evangelion? I don't know what Evangelion is but she seemed obsessed with it at the time.)

Some time after this, me and Tori met my two best friends (whose names I edited out of the screenshots) and interacted on Twitter before moving to Discord (because Twitter DMs suck and Elon is a bitch)

And that Group Chat on Discord is where all of her screenshots come from. However, differently from what she made others believe, me and Tori didn't actually interact too much in that GC at all, and when we did, it was to talk about our lives/funny memes/Hand Jumper.

This is mostly due to time zone restraints. Tori studied in the morning/afternoon while I was at work, and when night fell (when she was active) I was in school and only came back home during midnight.

Did I talk about NSFW in the GC? Yeah, but Tori wasn't present when me and the others were talking about it, and she never replied or interacted with those messages so I never thought she even saw them. I was even surprised she took screenshots of our convos at all jhds

And also despite what she makes it look like, we didn't talk JUST about NSFW in the group chat, and I also never instigated them to talk about it. I actually had to scroll a LOT to find the conversations Tori mentioned. There are actually very few and far between who are buried below normal conversations and vents about our lives and interests.

The ones who usually started the NSFW convos were my two besties and Tori (when I was offline). Tori actually liked to send NSFW Tower of God (webtoon) fanfictions in the middle of normal conversations just to make the others acknowledge and talk about it.

She also makes fun of me for asking for help with my smut fanfics, but Tori also asked US for help with her own TOG rapefic (I think it involved a blue haired boy and his uncle?) because she also wrote NSFW (and especially fic-threads on Twitter). I remember she sent me the google docs she wrote the rapefic on but I don't have access to it anymore because I don't save other people's google docs.

And now you might say:

"Wait! You are a proshipper?! You just lost all of your credibility!"

And to that I say: Yeah, I am a proshipper. Proshipper just means I don't tell people to kill themselves or harass them if they like a ship I don't. That's literally it.

And even if you still hate me for using that word and decides to side with Tori because of it, just know that she also calls herself a proshipper (she used to have this on her discord bio as well, but deleted it. This only exists in her tiktok now.) and STILL talks about/interacts with rapefics/incest fics. I'm inclined to believe that she also writes Dead Dove fics but publishes them under a different alias, but that's just speculation.

So like, yeah. If you hate me for being a proshipper just know she is one too so like we're on equal ground here lmao.

Well, continuing.

At some point, Tori sent a long message in our group chat (screenshot below) saying she didn't feel comfortable talking about NSFW with us.

And you know what I did?

I... respected her boundaries.

(I edited the pictures together because of Tumblr's image limit. I hope you can read them. If it is too pixelated I'll just reblog the post with the standalone pictures)

She didn't want to talk about NSFW/Dead Doves with us? That's okay. I understood that. It was also around that time I finally started coming to my senses and realized that it didn't matter if I had any good or bad intentions towards Tori, me talking about those things with her in the first place was a bad thing, and I shouldn't have done it.

Tori said she didn't want to lose our friendship or leave on bad terms, so I asked the other girls to censor all of their mature messages (not only NSFW stuff, but also just bad/sad stuff/news from irl news sources) so she could talk to us without being exposed to any type of bad things (because she was also venting a LOT to us at the time and said she wanted to forget the real world for a moment.)

I also made a Discord server with just me, Tori, and our two friends. The server doesn't exist anymore, as my friend deleted it, but I basically divided the server into two sections so we could talk about anything we wanted as a group without bothering/triggering Tori.

But...It was also in that server that Tori started saying extremely concerning things.

Not only did she become progressively mean with time, but she also said she and her sister PROUDLY doxxed someone, and she was RACIST towards my friend, saying that she, a (probably) white person had the RIGHT to call my friend the N word because she wasn't (in her words, not mine) "actually black". Just for context, this friend is BLASIAN (black and asian) so she was being racist AND xenophobic at the SAME TIME. (Sadly, neither me or said friend have the screenshots to prove it, only the memory of it. But all 3 of us can back this up because we saw the conversation happening.)

She also, somehow, found out the school address of another one of my friends AND their ZIP Code, and sent a google streetview picture of said friend's school saying that she didn't live "too far away" which scared the shit out of me and the other girls.

I hope you can see the screenshots properly. I wasn't the one who took them, so they are pixelated.

Those are the screenshots where Tori says she doxxed someone, and tried to guilt trip my friend into giving her their address so she could doxx them too.

Screenshots of me and my friends talking about the situation, and about the fact Tori kept on posting NSFW on her (then) TikTok account and talked about it to her other friends who were probably younger than her.

Screenshots of Tori being mean to me and my friends out of nowhere and for no reason. (The blue line was an unrelated message I deleted for the sake of space)

And, well, Tori being racist to our friend was the final straw. Sure maybe she was exagerating/lying about the doxx thing but we couldn't accept her being racist. So, I, Aline, ghosted Tori, which angered her quite a lot.

But instead of deleting the server, I just left it with Tori and my two friends in it (which was a dumb mistake). My two friends were left with this teenager they didn't like and were AFRAID OF while she stalked both me and them. I don't know what her objective was with all this but if she wanted to scare us, well then she did.

Our friends were so scared of her that they were afraid of cutting off their friendship normally. One of them even told me they were afraid Tori would doxx her if she unfriended her, and we were all looking for ways to get this girl out of our life so we could be in peace once and for all.

However, Tori used to LEAK Sleepacross' Patreon.

And why is this important? Well, because she once sent a google drive link with said patreon images to us once (I wasn't online at the time (it was late at night and I was in school) so I didn't see it) but her drive was e-mail locked. So basically, she had to approve which e-mail would be able to see the contents of her drive.

And this is how she was able to get a hold of my friends' personal e-mails. She could've very well deleted them from the drive's history but she KEPT THEM SAVED and used them to STALK and HARASS my two friends once they blocked her.

And after my friends blocked her e-mail address, Tori started STALKING AND HARASSING my OTHER friends, block evading and asking them to message me about why we left her.

Above are screenshots about the entire e-mail situation, as well as a the very e-mail Tori sent my friends and the conversation I had with the friend who received Tori's messages.

Tori said she didn't want to be my hater but she didn't know why I blocked her. And well, the answer is simple: Tori is transphobic (more on that below) Racist, xenophobic, ableist, Doxxed at least TWO people and is PROUD of it, found out where our friends lived and THREATENED TO DOXX THEM if they ever got on her bad side.

So like, aside from the fact we shouldn't even have talked in the first place, we were just scared that this TEENAGER would doxx us online and do something bad to us.

And also, remember when Tori said she didn't like NSFW or Hand Jumper anymore? Well, turns out she was lying. Because not only does she still post about Hand Jumper, she uses pictures from the webtoon to say the most CRUDE AND AWFUL THINGS I've EVER seen someone say.

Above are screenshots of Tori being ableist and transphobic (this was back when the olympics were going on and she sided against the woman who was suffering transphobia without even being trans at all)

And remember when Tori nearly used the N word against a black person? Well it seems she isn't above using slurs at all because she (a cisgender girl) called a trans person a slur with no remorse and with no reason. (Just Tori suddenly turning on her friends and being mean for no reason, i guess.)

Yesterday Tori got her friends together and started calling me names and making threats against my life. And I don't care whether they are just joking and being teenagers or not, but what they are saying is extremely problematic, especially because I know some of the people in that server are adults as well and should know better

I personally don't care about their threats and what ill they have to say about me. Let them speak, I don't care. Nothing these children ever say about me will be worse than the things I have to live with on a day-to-day basis, so like yeah keep talking. Your words can't reach me.

However, I am still making this post anyway. And you may say:

"Woah Aline, but aside from Tori's server and friend group this situation was private! Why are you exposing this at all?"

That's simple. Because Tori decided to include my friends into all of this. She can hate me all she want, send me death threats and suicide bait me all day, but if she has something against me, then she should keep it between me and her only. NOT the other girls.

She sent them all screenshots of our group chat (which were the few times we even spoke about NSFW) and didn't even censor my friends' names, and is trying to get her friends to rally against them, even if they literally didn't do anything wrong.

And I'm so sorry but. If I REALLY was the bad person Tori is making me out to be, surely she wouldn't go out of her way to block evade, stalk and harass my friends to get back into contact, with me, right?

If I really was bad, then she would've thanked GOD that I left her life, but she didn't. She always found a way to stalk both me and the other girls. And it's clear from her message to my other friend (screenshots above) that she was clearly mad and upset that we left her, and this all culminated in her talking shit about me and giving people that never even interacted with me before the wrong idea.

ALL my friends, not just the ones who were originally part of our gc, are afraid of her simply because they INTERACTED with her in the past. They are afraid she will doxx them or get her friends to attack them.

And the thing that made me write this post at all is because my best friend is scared for her life and feeling extremely suicidal because of this teenager who just doesn't know how to get my name out of her mouth.

My friends have been suffering with terrible anxiety and paranoia all because of Tori. Afraid of her and her little friend group, afraid of being doxxed and attacked online. They are afraid of interacting with the Hand Jumper fandom altogether because Tori is seen as some sort of "celebrity" and her word is law, especially because since she is a minor, people will always side with her no matter what.

So I made this post to finally pull off the bandaid and put the spotlight on myself, not the other girls.

Yes, it was my fault for keeping a friendship out of pity and not love. I was wrong for talking about NSFW near/with Tori. It didn't matter if I was also a minor at the time, I was still older and should have known better. It was wrong of me to do so despite me not having bad intentions. Sure yeah my existence (or lack thereof) in Tori's life would not have changed whether or not she interacted/wrote NSFW things before the right time, but I shouldn't have interacted with her regardless. Sadly, I was naive then. I was wrong, and I apologize. Not to the strangers who are reading this, but to Tori, who I shouldn't even have been friends with in the first place.

And to Tori, this message is for you once someone sends you this post:

Despite everything you did, despite all the horrid things you've said about me, all the death threats and harm you've commited to me and my friends, I want you to know that I don't wish any harm upon you.

I'm sorry for ghosting you instead of sending you a proper goodbye. You must have felt very confused, especially because the others left you soon after. For that I am also guilty.

But I also acknowledge the fact that you know that you are wrong, and that you know your age doesn't make you innocent, but you still bring it up as a defense regardless because you know people will side with you no matter what you've done.

Was I in the wrong for talking about NSFW around you? Yeah.

But you were also wrong for saying slurs, for being racist, for doxxing someone and threatening to doxx your friends if they ever left you. You were wrong to leak the patreon and for making a harassment campaign against me. I know I was wrong too but doxxing, stalking, racism and harassment are also crimes in the USA.

You were transphobic on your Tiktok, said an absurdly ableist statement that I still cannot believe is real, and even without me in your life, you interacted/still interacts with NSFW posts both on Tiktok and AO3 (and I don't doubt you do so on Twitter as well, but I can't log on the website). So while you and your friends can call me disgusting for liking porn and dead doves, you are not all that different from me and you know that.

And I know you know that doxxing, racism, transphobia and ableism is worse than any fanfiction either I or you could have written, but you can't accept that.

You are probably what? 15 now? You aren't 8 years old. You are not a child. You know the weight of your words and yet you decide to speak them anyway because you think the word "minor" will get you a "get out of jail free card", but that only works for so long.

...

So, yeah. That's it. This is the post. I was wrong but Tori is also no saint. And if you are her friend and you are reading this, I think it's better you reconsider your choices before she starts harassing you, too.

And if you are a bystander and want to cuss me out, then sure, go forth. Shit on me for calling myself a proshipper, shit on me for doing something I knew was wrong, call me a freak and block me I DON'T CARE.

Just leave my girls out of this, because they are not guilty of anything. They just befriended the wrong person who had all the wrong intentions. Any hate and harassment should come to me and NOT them.

That's all I have to say.

I hope september treats you with kindness, and that everyone stays safe out there.

(Below are just a few screenshots of me and my friends talking about the situation, both during and after this entire debacle. I didn't have a place to put them in on the original post.)

[skyfallscotland]

Writing Advice: tips, tricks & helpful links, from your friendly neighbourhood fanfic author ✨ (part one—the advice)

see part two—the resources here

I've mentioned this before, but I truly believe no one's born a great writer. A great storyteller, yes. A great writer? That's learned. I've been reading and writing basically as long as I can remember. Learning to write is like...learning through both practice and symbiosis. In saying that, I get asked about this a lot, so here's what I do and some things that might help you.

Write what you're inspired to write, when you're inspired to write it.

So you have an idea—great! Are you a plotter or a pantser? Some people like to start with an outline, others just jot down a few notes and let the keyboard take them where it will. I'm in the latter camp, generally. For me, the best way to avoid writer's block is to write what I'm inspired to write, when I want to write it. Sometimes I'll write five chapters of a story at once, others I'll switch between a multi-chapter and a one-shot.

What's most important for me, personally, is that I don't try and force anything. If you suffer from demand avoidance, the worst thing you could possibly do (in my opinion), is set arbitrary goals. You don't need to write 500 words a day. If you want to, great! If that helps you, also great, but in my experience, that will generally just make my brain say well no, now we're not writing anything for a whole week, maybe a month, if you test me.

I also personally like to have a whole fic written before I start posting it online, or at least most of it written. I like being quite far ahead of what readers are seeing because I am a pantser. It takes the pressure off and honestly, there'd be so many plot holes if I didn't. Which brings me to...

First make it exist, then make it make sense, after that make it good.

What you see me post is not my first run-through. It's not even the second. I've written, read over, and changed things at least a handful of times before ever posting it, especially when it's a multi-chapter work. Sometimes I'll write a scene I love and then realise it just doesn't flow well, because three chapters back I had someone say a certain thing. In that instance, I'll put the scene aside.

Note that I said 'put aside' not 'delete'. I never delete them until I'm finished with a fic and I'm certain I won't need them, ever. Been there, made that mistake for you! Having a separate document with just various scenes you can insert at a later date also helps you to feel like it's ok to write what you want to write when you want to write it. I'll be honest, I jump around a lot. Sometimes I'll be inspired to write a scene I know isn't coming for another five chapters, but in my opinion it's best to just write it because when I get there five chapters down the line, I might not have the inspiration or I might have forgotten how I wanted things to go. Write what your brain wants to, fill in the blanks later!

Write from the heart.

My most popular work is the one I find the easiest to write and I almost never wrote it at all. Isn't that ridiculous? I almost never wrote it because I know it's cliché and excessive, and honestly...looked down upon. I almost didn't write it because of other people's opinions; then I said fuck it, I want to read it so surely there's someone else out there that does, too? Turns out there were thousands of you. Who knew?

But that work has really resonated with so many people and I think that's because I've poured so much of myself, my pain, my own experiences into it, into her. For that reason, I'd tell anyone starting out to try original character fic if that's what they want to do. Fuck the haters. All their favourite works were original characters once too.

Don't read similar fic while you're writing yours...unless you need to.

Let me explain. If I'm writing a certain type of alternate universe, or a certain storyline I know someone else has written, I won't read theirs until I'm done if I can help it, especially not if I'm actively writing my take on it. This isn't a hard and fast rule, it's obviously up to you what you feel comfortable with, but I would never want to have someone else's work influence my own too much, or get our ideas confused in my head, you know?

An exception to this rule, for me personally, is if I'm stuck with specific things in particular, like smut. When I wrote my first smut piece from a male POV, I was struck by the fact that I had no idea what an orgasm felt like for them, or how to describe it, because despite reading M/M fic for years, I apparently never absorbed that particular verbiage, so I went looking and read a whole bunch of smut from the male POV just to get an idea. Which leads into...

So you suck at kung-fu fighting.

Action scenes. I'm convinced we all hate them just as much as each other. I hate them so much I've changed whole plotlines from canon just so I don't have to include them. Unfortunately, my main fandom features a bunch of knife-throwing, sword-wielding, dragon riders at a war college who spar for clout, so I mean...it's unavoidable.

I still suck at writing it though, so what I now do for sparring and other hand-to-hand combat is search up youtube for sparring videos or self-defence lessons. It's much easier to describe what you're seeing than to imagine the mechanics and positioning of an artform you've never performed. The kung-fu thing was a joke, I like capoeira personally.

Stop being so damn hard on yourself.

Listen, everyone wants to be better than they are when they start out, literally everyone. I know I sure did. That's normal. Accept that it's normal before you start because the thing is, no one's a harsher critic on you, than you are and you'll always want to be better. There's a quote from Ira Glass that I'll paraphrase:

“Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap[...]It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit."

It's very true. Hopefully you have the support of a really welcoming fandom to reassure you that actually, you're nowhere near as bad as you think you are.

READ. BOOKS.

@justallihere says you can’t be good at something you don’t know anything about and it's so true, I've phrased it before as learning by symbiosis, when you read more, you'll internalise more. You're subconsciously learning how story structure works—plot hooks, transitions, metaphors and similie, grammar, style and punctuation.

Show don't tell.

...yeah this one I haven't mastered, I could use some help with that myself if anyone's got any words of wisdom, thanks.

Take all of this with a grain of salt.

I couldn't tell you how many writer's advice threads and blogs and whatever-else I've read over the years—too many, for sure. What I can tell you is 80% of what I've read was crap. It doesn't apply to me at best and it's unhelpful at worst. Maybe it's the neurodivergence, maybe it's just the fact that everyone's different and all you can do is give things a try, but based on that I can say with certainty that not all of this will work for you and that's absolutely fine! But I hope at least a few things do 😌

For links to more specific resources including thesauruses, generators, and other writers' advice, click here.

[acid-ixx]

I wanna come out the anon closet XD and, say that it was me who sent you the dick ask about him closing the door whenever the titans came over, and the other ask about knowing any other dc characters, and say that I’m happy to see another account who writes for dc comics and very pleased with your fics and your writing skills.

I’m a writer myself well that’s what I try to tell myself before deleting my work cause it doesn’t get me to where I want it to be cause most of the times the male reader is mostly smut (which I’m not a prude) but I wish there was more different genre fics like yours. What I’m trying to say is what motivates you to keep on writing even of others won’t like or appreciate your fics?

hii !! i'm glad that there are so many people who are writing for the batfam or dc overall hehe bec years ago there wasn't much fics i have seen of them and i always get so pleased whenever someone mentions that they like my writing skills bec let's all face it, a lot of us suffer from imposter syndome very often. like me who, despite my years of writing, feel like i could've done better or whatnot.

and i heavily relate to u when u say u delete so much of your works or abandon plenty of ur drafts (i have over 50 drafts in my tumblr, and over hundreds of them in my notes app) but that's something i find incredibly taxing for me and it's a toxic habit for myself where i put so much pressure and expectations on my writing, but that in itself only resulted in months or even years of hiatus.

a way that keeps me motivated to write or make content really is to write for yourself. if you write for a fandom, just remember the reason you're writing in the first place would be for your personal indulgence. the reason i made this blog in the primarily is because there was a lack of fanfics that appeal to my tastes and so I decided to write for myself even if i know that sometimes my fics won't blow up or it wouldn't even get the traction i wanted it to get— yet there's nothing wrong with it, actually. hell, i find that the things i like to write the most are those that blow up more often.

really, i like writing because it's a way for me to express my own desires or explore concepts and if that doesn't really appeal to my readers or won't be appreciated as much then it's alright for me because this is my own account and the things i post also counts as an archive and a timeline for my writing journey.

[lazysublimeengineer]

Hello. Let me exposed this kind of reader who is a coward and toxic to the fanfic authors.

Usually, when I received this kind of reviews in the past it doesn't faze me and I just don't care in general or if I'm in a happy mood I don't have any qualms of obliterating them online.

But what I can't tolerate is these kind of readers shitting on the other author's work just because they want to and abusing their freedom and rights to be critical of their story just because they don't like something in there.

As a fellow writer and author myself let me tell you this to you readers and to this cowardly reader who hides being a guest reviewer in this platform. I have an intention to respond to that story but since I can't find it anymore there (most likely that it was deleted), I'll be giving a piece of my mind:

As an author, it is very delightful and inspirational to receive a simple commentary or review to the works that we publish on an online platform. We appreciate it really. It fuels us to share more stories to the fandom itself. Now if you don't like it or if it doesn't cater to your taste then that's fine. Not all readers share the same taste as you. If you leave an objective critique about our work then that's great. BUT TO OFFER A DISGUSTING COMMENTARY ABOUT HOW DISAPPOINTING YOUR FIC IS AND WILL STOP SUPPORTING THEM THAT'S WHERE I DRAW THE LINE. I don't care if I lose a reader or whatever. I'm publishing stories since the dawn of a lifetime but to see privileged readers being a BULLY TO OTHER WRITERS SUCH AS MYSELF I WON'T TURN A BLIND EYE TO IT AND I DON'T HAVE ANY PROBLEMS OF OBLITERATING YOU ONLINE. Words are powerful. It can make or break a person's morale and mental health.

To wtf (Guest) reader, if you're reading this, your response exposes you on how much of a moron you are. The day you humiliated an author online because they decided to write an ISARIN fic on BL fandom is the day you lose your right to say to me to STOP BEING NOSY AND MIND MY OWN BUSINESS. BULLY READERS LIKE YOU ARE ONE OF THE REASONS WHY SOME OF THE AUTHORS ARE HESITANT TO SHARE THEIR FICS BECAUSE OF YOUR DISGUSTING WORDS. If you're abusing your freedom of speech to shit on a fellow author like me, then I'm using my right as well to EXPOSED BULLIES LIKE YOU ONLINE.

Lastly, to the other readers who are reading this. Please refrain from being a reader like this who doesn't READ A PROPER TAGGING AND AUTHOR'S NOTES. It's not our obligation to cater to your whims and needless whines just because you don't like the story and failed to read the taggings and warnings first. FANFIC AUTHORS DO NOT GAIN ANY MONETARY VALUE FROM SHARING THEIR FICS ONLINE. We write because we want to. And not to satisfy the other reader's taste. There's a back button there for a reason. I won't be revealing that story online and the author to still provide a confidentiality to them.

I know there's a ton of toxic readers like wtf (Guest) and I can't probably stop them with a post like this but I want to spread awareness and kindly request to stop being an idiot like this reader.

[tenpintsof-sundrop]

https://www.tumblr.com/gardensofivy/760120697566707712/where-is-the-fluff-i-am-sick-of-the-smut-what

i feel like i remember you talking about posts like this before.

it kinda irritates me that everyone on that post are so harsh about how they REALLY WANT FLUFF and are SICK OF SMUT

all my dash has been lately is fluff and i’m not complaining, i like every genre. maybe it’s their dash.

fanfic writers are writing what they want and i’m sorry that you don’t like it, but again, it’s out there, you just have to look. maybe they should look harder. do they know that there are tagging systems on this app + ao3 where they can search for fluff specifically?

i know first hand that it’s hard to write fanfic but can’t they at least try it out for themselves if they are really wanting fluff instead of complaining about it and how writers won’t give them exactly what they crave?

sorry for bringing this to you i just have no one to talk about this with 😭

don't apologize for bringing stuff like this to me. my inbox is always open as a rant space

I went to look up the post and it said that it was deleted (I was very curious to see the comments, but rip lmao) - but even just from that blurb of the url, I can definitely get a sense of the aggression against smut in the post

as far as the 'I hate smut, I want fluff' crowd - it feels like people who don't know how to navigate fandom spaces, but also people who are sexually repressed.

BECAUSE

from all my experience, especially recent experiences - smut fics will always be more popular. if people actually wanted fluff fics, or fics without smut, then my non-smut fics would be more popular. every single time one of my fics has smut, it will always be more popular.

a lot of the time, I regret not putting a smut scene a fic (especially toward the end) because I know that people will read through the actually interesting well-thought out hard work 'plot' part of a fic that I wrote in order to get to a pointless smut scene that I never intended to have there in the first place (as of right now, one of my biggest regrets is not putting a smut scene in Heaven's Gate to get more eyes on it)

it is my opinion that people are lying when they say they don't want smut fics. just straight up fucking lying. (or very few people are telling the truth when they say it, and then they don't seek out the fics they truly want)

Heaven's Gate - which is clearly tagged as having fluff got 11 notes in its first 24 hours

Need - which is tagged as smut/pwp got over 100 notes in its first 24 hours of being posted

yes, there are other factors to take into account, like the length, the gender of the reader character (which, don't even get me started on the 'GN afab' reader character thing - which is so fucking transphobic and misogynistic and rigid to the fucking gender binary it makes me wanna die), and the fact that Heaven's Gate is also marked as Hurt/Comfort and a lot of people in fandom these days seem to hate basic conflict in stories??? - but they are for the same love interest and they are posted for the same fandom

so to me, this is solid, concrete proof that smut will always attract a larger audience. every single one of my smut fics that exists in the same genre as a fic without smut has a larger audience

(unless it's a wlw fic, but again - that's a whole different story. cause don't get me started on the whole 'we need more sapphic stories' crowd who never fucking read wlw fics when they are posted)

I feel like this is really a two pronged problem

one: the recent Catholic sexual repression in fandoms (and in queer spaces/the internet in general)

two: people who love to complain but make zero effort to change the things that they complain about in fandoms (hecklers, in a sense)

the first one is something me and @nctzenkane have talked about at large. it's the "sex scenes are so unnecessary in movies" thing and people directly relating the things you ship to your morals - the idea that the kind of fanfiction you write and read is directly in line with your moral fiber as a person. these are known as thought crimes. which is a highly Catholic sensation

in Catholicism, it's the idea that God can see all and knows all, and therefore, thinking bad things is on the same level of sin as performing a bad act - so thinking about sex too frequently or thinking about harming someone is on the same level as physically committing a murder, and both of these things equally make you a bad person. (and so you need to keep your mind 'pure' for God.)

in modern times, it's the idea that associating with certain topics of fanfiction makes you 'sus' and an untrustworthy person, and that you are more likely to follow through with the bad acts that you read about - like rape, pedophilia, unhealthy age gape relationships, violent crimes, ect. - if you read about those things frequently. (which is untrue, for the fucking record.)

and for the hecklers... god.

someone talked about the sensation of how the pandemic caused this huge shift in fandom, and yeah - I felt it happen in real time.

people who formerly were never in fandom or saw it as a 'nerdy' hobby (people whose hobbies were based around socialization - like drinking and going to bars, etc. or younger people who were allowed unsupervised internet access for the first time) all flooded fandom spaces with 0 sense of fandom etiquette. those are the 'writing fanfiction is too hard so I'm going to harass experienced fanfiction writers' people.

they love to complain about things they don't like in fandom without doing anything to change those things - even if it's something as simple as blocking and following the right people to curate their feed or curating their AO3 tags. the other day I saw dozens of people on tiktok saying that they don't know what the 4 symbols in the corner of the fics on AO3 mean. A lot of people assumed that they were there FOR NO REASON. it made me want to start chewing on glass, no lie

anyway. the landscape of fandom right now is so... (sigh.)

[poisonpercy]

What are your favorite tropes or themes you like seeing in PJO fic? Do you have any recs for them?

I’m gonna preface my response by saying I haven’t really read any PJO fanfics that I wasn’t already subscribed to in at least a year.

With that out of the way, I don’t really have any favorite tropes or themes I like in PJO fics, as what I like is more broad. However, I do tend to favor hurt/comfort and angst in general across all fandoms I’m in. I also like fics that take place during canon to expand on topics that can’t really be brought to much depth in the actual books due to them being aimed at kids. Canon-divergent fics are also fun. So are fics that explore Percy’s potential relationships with his immortal family (not the Olympians but the underwater family). Also fics that focus on chb campers being friends are really good. Crack fics are also something I like to indulge in. That being said, here’s some recs:

(note: I looked through some of my 643 pages of ao3 history for this, and don’t remember most of these fics. But I remember liking them…I think. The vibes from the summary and tags seem good at the very least)

Here’s a previous post I made that had fic recs

the anatomy of a hurricane by barbarianprincess

On Heists and Home Economics by chelletheriter

Like a New Yorker by notalotgoingonatthisinstant

Out of Mind, Out of Control by allieae

Venom by maverickk

For Zoe Nightshade by thewinginthenight

across the river by r1ptides

Fighting Blind by Multifandom_damnation

Familiar Faces by annabetn

Our Bonds Bend, Not Break by forestfairy72

asymptote by eternalmagic

Grover’s Worries by Nikki_RavenScar

I gave up looking after this point lmao. Anyways here’s just a few fics that I’ve read and liked in one way or another.

There was a really good Percy & Triton sibling relationship fic that I would love to recommend (Fishing in Alaska you will always be famous to me) but the author has deleted their online presence including the fic. I did see that someone was reposting it on ao3 but that’s technically stolen work which I don’t condone and wrong without direct permission from the original creator (I wonder if it got taken down or not)

A lot of my mutuals are very talented writers so I would recommend checking them out. Here’s their tumblrs and ao3

seasunwrites | @chironshorseass

connabeth | @connabeth

posallys | @posallys

barbarianprincess | @barbarianprncess

percyj | @annabethy

[whentommymetalfie]

Tagged by @bouncydragon. Thank you for giving me a chance to ramble!

20 questions for fan fiction writers

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

53

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

642 307 (!)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently only Peaky Blinders

4. Top five fics by kudos

Breathe again, Kiss with a fist, Family is family, Little talks, Shattered and hollow

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to always do that for my WIPs but sometimes I forget to when I get a comment on an older fic. But that doesn't mean I don't read and appreciate them!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I was about to say that I never write angsty endings, because I can't handle them, but then I remembered about whumptober where I dabbled in that, sort of. I think it's a tie between Aversion and Confinement, and even those have a glimpse of hope at the end because I'm just like that.

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh that's a tough one, since happy endings are my jam, so I've got plenty. But I think that To live a life, an installment in my first AU has a very happy ending, considering the angst that comes before.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I recall getting like... one really nasty comment once, years ago, but I've completely forgotten what it said, because I just deleted it and was sad about it for a few days and now it's gone from my mind, I just remember it happening because it's so rare.

And I've gotten a comment or two where a reader has disapproved of something in a fic, or where it's clear that they've interpreted something an entirely different way than I intended, and where they've chosen to express that in a not entirely nice way. I think when that's happened, I've left the comment, but haven't responded to it, because I just don't feel like going into discussions or spending my energy of that. But mostly all my readers are incredibly kind, which is a huge reason why I keep posting my work.

9. Do you write smut?

I have on occasion written a fic or two mostly focused on smut, upon request, and I incorporate sex-scenes into fics when I feel they serve a purpose.

10. Craziest crossover?

I've never written one, but I'm not opposed to them

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, a few!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope

14. All time favorite ship?

Well got to be Tommy/Alfie right? Just look at all my... stuff.

15. What’s a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have plenty of shorter unpublished wips where I've just wanted to 'try' an idea, or get something out of my head. Or be especially self indulgent. Those never get past the draft stage. But anything I truly want to finish and post, I usually do finish. Eventually.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I honestly think that one of my writing strengths is keeping at it, even when everything feels impossible, because without that stubbornness, many of my fics would've gotten finished. Cheesy as it may sound.

On a more technical note, I think -hope- that I'm good finding a good pace in my stories, at least my latest ones. And... describing emotions maybe.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

The first thing that comes to mind, and that often feel the most limited by, is that English is my second language. That always adds a layer of insecurity. And I'm not great at writing action, or scenes with many characters (I always feel like I'm trying to juggle with way too many balls)

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I think it can work great when it serves a purpose, but with my lacking language skills I just incorporate into the text that a character isn't speaking English, rather than typing the dialogue out in the actual language.

19. First fandom you wrote in?

My first ever fanfic I posted was for True Blood. Ten years ago now, which feels crazy.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Tough one... If I'm only allowed finished fics, I'd have to say Breathe Again, because it's my first truly long, multi-chaptered project and I grew a lot as a writer -I think- while writing that. But I do want to give Home to you it's own shoutout (even if I have yet to finish that last chapter that's haunting me because I'm so afraid to mess it up) because it's so intrinsically connected to Breathe again.

tagging (with no pressure of course, and apologies if you've already been tagged) @abusivelittlebunny @100dabbo @andtherewerefireworks @elskiee

[zorosdimples]

I definitely get your point but the toxicity in fandom spaces really does make it difficult to enjoy it now especially on here. I’ve seen so much discourse in the last 24 hours in the jjk fandom and I know you say you’re trying to curate a safe space or positive space without someone looking through the tags to find new content to reblog so others can reblog in your circles it’s almost impossible to keep that ideal going? Because how would new non-toxic people ever get their work seen if it isn’t found through main tags? And it sounds like you don’t bother looking for or reading new writers work either if you said there’s no point with tags

i will answer this even though you ended it on—what sounds to me like—a passive-aggressive note. maybe you didn’t intend for it to come across that way, but it did.

i would like to start by saying that i am not a timeworn, well-established blog; i’ve been here since july 2023, which is about 10 and a half months at this point, and never shared fanfic or actively participated in the animanga community until then. a lot of people that i’ve met have been on tumblr for years. so relatively speaking, i’m a “new writer” in fandom.

i’m not going to talk about discourse or the abuse of the tagging system because i think this is an issue on any and every social media platform. unless there are mods who go through and ensure that all posts are relevant to the tags they’re under, there will always be irrelevant content in certain tags; many people are more interested in their work being seen than in abiding by any sort of organizational standards.

that said, tumblr has a unique issue. sometimes, tagging simply doesn’t work on here. it has happened to myself and countless others on multiple occasions: you tag your post currently and it doesn’t show up in the tags. it can be related to images/banners/dividers or words you use in the tags (i.e. using the word “horny” or putting “tw choking”). but other times nothing is “wrong” but your post still won’t show up! and there’s nothing to do about it except to 1. delete the post and wait it out or 2. keep the post up and let it not show up in the tags.

of course it would be nice if the tags worked and if people would keep relevant posts under the correct tags, but that’s a not realistic option currently, so there are other ways to go about sharing work. also i would like to say that while the tags aren’t a complete loss, they aren’t a reliable way to find new work. i never said there was “no point with the tags.”

this was the crux of my post that you saw: the best way to find artists and writers and individuals is through community. you can search tags and see which specific blogs are popular for those tags, and work your way from there. but writers don’t blow up and get noticed because their works are in the tags; they gain traction once they find a place in the community.

i’ve said this in private before—never on my blog—but in my opinion, there are 3 components to a “viral” post:

it’s about something that’s currently popular

it looks pleasing to the eye (to draw people’s interest)

it’s shared by the right blogs

a new writer will never be popular if they only rely on the tags; they must do digging and groundwork to find blogs that they relate to and enjoy. it’s not an overnight process. it takes time and effort. and the same goes for readers! it starts small: by finding one or two blogs that you adore. and then seeing who those blogs interact with, and working your way outward. again: it takes time and energy. but it’s so worth it.

new writers (and artists) are constantly joining our community, and we usually find them when they follow us or follow blogs that we follow. so, to address your last point: no, i don’t often sift through the tags. but i do look at every single blog that follows me, and i do follow new writers. and i do see what the people i follow are reblogging, and find new writers that way, too.

also you can filter and block words and tags that you don’t want to see, like “discourse” and whatnot. the beautiful thing about tumblr is you can curate your space to best suit you!

[owlf45]

Hi Owl, did owl, did you ever hate your own writing? Like thinking its so bad to the point that you want to delete it? Because i just upload my first ever fanfic and keep overthinking about the fic, its just everytime i read it its feels worst than before 😭. Did you have advice about how to deal with this feeling?

Absolutely I did! Almost every author's note in all of my old fics has a section with me expressing how much I hated my own writing.

The beginning stage of writing is hard. It's okay if what you wrote wasn't exactly what you had in your head, but if you're having fun with the process, the end product doesn't have to be perfect (it never is). It doesn't matter. You'll only get better at writing as you go.

Secondly, the more you read something repeatedly, the more you hate it. Forbid yourself from reading your fic for the next few months. Some of the writing I hated the most, I went back to read it years later and it was funny, charming, or downright amazing. If you read it too often, you become so entangled with it that you forget that a reader is absorbing everything you wrote for the first time— and they'll probably love it. Leave it alone until you can look at it with fresh eyes. Stop reading it! Don't obsess over it.

Also, it's straightforward as an author to point out what you think are 'flaws' in your work. But guess what? Readers... probably won't even notice. In fact, some of the things you think suck, your readers will find meaning in. When I was younger and a bit more nihilistic, I thought Imaginary was always too fluffy to be that rich in complexity compared to some of my darker works. However, readers pointed out how the fact that the characters choose kindness and silliness—repeatedly, despite their own history—is refreshing, optimistic, and genuinely joyful. Your readers can find so many valuables in your writing that you never even comprehended while writing it. So you can hate your work, but really, you only hate your perception of it.

(I can never give a concise response, so the rest is under the cut:)

I have deleted plenty of my old works because I hated them. There are about ten that will never see the light of day again. And while I don't regret taking them down, I GREATLY regret not saving backups. My recommendation: keep your fic up (for now) until you've written a couple more. You learn a shitton of writing skills within those first few fics, and if you keep backtracking rather than moving forward, you might feel stuck. Once you get more comfortable with the writing process and you have a bigger pool of writing to compare with, then start thinking about what you want public and what you don't. (And save everything as a backup). I caution you against obsessing over a perfect profile/discography, however, and deleting everything as soon as you don't like it anymore. It's very easy to compare your works and your stats with this invisible standard you've set for yourself, or with other creators. Don't.

My relationship with my writing improved the most when I started posting more, and when I kept the silly stuff on my profile. When I only had 3 works (and two were long-form WIPs), I felt super self-conscious about posting anything new. But then I did Fic Fight and posted like 12 works in a month, and most of them are not that significant. But they were fun to write. Suddenly I gained a much healthier respect for my writing. It doesn't have to be perfect, I just have to enjoy writing and sharing it with others. I think all writers who put a lot of stock into their writing have to internalize that at some point.

If you really enjoyed writing your first fic, and you really want to share it with others, then keep doing it. There may come a time down the line, maybe a few years later, when you can look back at this fic and recognize how you would write it differently. But that comes with time and experience. So keep writing for fun and for yourself! (And if you're stuck, stop re-reading your writing, and ask a friend to beta your work for you!)

Hell, I will give a perfect example right now. For all I appreciate my own writing, I still get a little weird about Imaginary. So I asked a few of my readers, whenever I'm done with the next chapter, to read it before I post it and vibe-check it. I've been doing this since chapter 3. I've been doing it for five years, basically. And literally every time I've gotten nothing but kindness, and I still, irrationally, freak out every time I have to update again. Does that stop me? No, though it does take me forever to update! So you should do the same! Keep going! Even if it takes you a while.

So yes. There's my forever-long lecture. I fail always to be concise. I hope this helps.

[thursdayinspace]

20 questions for 20 writers

tagged by @thatfragilecapricorn30 @randomfoggytiger and @baronessblixen thank you!! <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 21

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 70.063 -- this is my new AO3, so that's why it's still so low, haha.

3. What fandoms do you write for? Only X-Files now.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? spectacular (glasses sex!), it's the day the world didn't end, from this morning forward (that makes me so happy), got you covered, wild side

5. Do you respond to comments? yes. if I ever don't, I'm sorry, it's not because i didn't love your comment, but i just don't get around to it right away sometimes. but i try to reply to every single one because i love them all.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ohhh. i don't write super angsty endings . . . I guess mend into pieces bc it's season 2 and they know they're making a mistake, but we all know they'll figure it out eventually, so.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? they pretty much all end happily. i'm going to more or less randomly pick five ways to say i love you. because i loved writing that ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics? so, okay. there are two stories here i want to tell from an old fandom. one is funny. one is kind of great, really?

the funny one: i got a looooong comment on a fic, like several paragraphs long, going into great detail about why the fic sucked and why i sucked and why i had personally offended them by writing fic at all. they obvs meant to comment anonymously but forgot to log out. by the time i got to my computer, they had deleted their entire account. of course i had their name in the ao3 email. i laughed so hard at that.

the kind of amazing one: i got a very rude anon on tumblr, and i responded by saying i'd be happy to discuss their criticism, but i wasn't going to have a conversation with a hockey puck with sunglasses, and asked them to come off anon so we could talk. and they did! they showed up in my dms a short while later. we solved nothing and did not part as friends, but i actually have mad respect for that. wherever they are today, i hope they have taken some anger management classes and are doing well!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yeah, i certainly do. idk what kind? the porny kind? lol no i mean it's kind of lame but fun.

10. Do you write crossovers? i wrote a stargate atlantis/firefly crossover centuries ago but that was it. or maybe start trek with sth else, i don't remember.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not to my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? i don't think so, no.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? yes! it's so much fun and i would do it again.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? mulder and scully!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i plan to finish all of them.

16. What are your writing strengths? it used to be dialogue but i don't think it is anymore. idk? i think i can create an atmosphere?

17. What are your writing weaknesses? i tend to repeat myself a lot and then skip over other things completely. i'm not good with transitions between scenes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i haven't done it, but if it would make sense for a fic, i might do it.

19. First fandom you wrote for? stargate atlantis. i was very late to the fanfic party.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? it's called 'ellipsis' and is still with the beta. but of the ones i've already posted, either from this morning forward or yesterday's future.

Randomfoggytiger added additional questions:

1. Is writing a hobby or way of life? i mean it's a hobby but it's definitely also a way of life. there isn't ever a time when i don't think about writing and everything all the time connects in some way to a thing i'm writing and i can't imagine what i'd do without writing.

2. A journal full of writing notes or a clean, completed manuscript? completed manuscript! or notes? uhh . . . both?

3. Who (or what) is your writing inspiration? everything. random things. i can't think of one specific thing, it can be literally anything.

4.Which is worse: someone you "idolize" reading your first draft or listening to you sing? both thoughts are equally awful lol

5. Has writing from someone else's POV ever changed your own perspective? yeah, i think so. not in any big way, but about smaller stuff, just the way i look at certain things? yes.

6. Tumblr, AO3, LiveJournal, or FFN? ao3!!! my tinkerbell brain loves the comment section, haha. also it's just so much nicer to read on ao3 and there's the download option, so also as a reader, def ao3.

7. AO3 wordcount, and are you satisfied with it? 70.063 - no, i'm not satisfied with it. i used to write multi-chapters with more words. but it's a new account so yeah starting small again.

8. What movie/book/fic gripped you irrevocably? jasper fforde's 'thursday next' series. it's where i stole my name from. literary detectives? oh man. it's the kind of story where you wish you'd had the idea first. go read it!!!!!

9. What's the highest compliment you could ever be given, and have you been given it? i am really really lucky to have been given so many amazing compliments and i appreciate every single one. i couldn't say what means the most to me . . . probably when it's personal to the commenter? when someone tells me sth i've written touched them in some way. bc that's what i want to achieve.

10. What defines your writing style? lol idek man pretentious purple prose? i think i live somewhere between overuse of metaphors and focus on the rhythm of a text. i love writing in english bc it flows so nicely. idk is trying to make it sound nice a style bc then that's at least what i'm going for.

who hasn't been tagged? no pressure tags for @backintimeforstuff @nachosncheezies @actual-changeling and everybody else who wants to!

[sailor-aviator]

I’m so glad you’re calling this out! People don’t respect boundaries and were made to look like the villains.

Tbh, I deleted the post you’re talking about after some confusion. I don’t think I worded some of it correctly, so I’ll rewrite it here.

I love supporting my friends and their fics. I love chatting with the fellow content creators one on one about their fics. I love talking about new ideas about the fics they want to write. When I reblog a fic with something along the lines of “Ah!! I’m so excited you’ve finally posted this! I’ve been waiting!!” It’s not because they mentioned it once on their blog, it’s literally because I have been talking to them in private chats about the work.

When someone I don’t really talk to or have never had a conversation with apart from the occasional one sentence reblog or comment starts tagging me in things? That’s where I have an issue. My blog is not a bulletin board or ad space for people to put their fics on. I try to reblog fics that don’t have very many notes, I really do (I’ve also been going through a bit of a reader’s block lately). I remember what it was like first starting out on this site as a first time fic author and being so excited to get ten notes on my fic. Now I’m nearing a milestone! I did that by tagging my fics with the proper hashtags and interacting with people who chose to read them. I never in a million years thought so many of you would want to read my silly little stories.

So believe me when I say, I totally get feeling wanting more people to see your fics. I wish more people saw mine too, but I’m very grateful for the people who stumble upon them and take the time to read them.

I also think it’s very interesting that when authors and other content creators on here set boundaries, we get such immense flashback from readers. We’re people, y’all, and the fact that we have to keep reminding everyone about that fact is, quite frankly, worrisome. We are not machines. We do not do this for a living. I do this for fun, and when I get push back for trying to set a boundary, whatever that boundary may be, it makes this less fun.

Again, I can’t speak for the other writers on there (but believe me when I say several conversations have been had), but for me personally? It all goes back to the fact that content creators are being stripped of their humanity. I remember how fun and interactive fandom used to be before everything started being monetized. I used to get asks left and right without even having written fanfic! Fandom used to be a huge community filled with laughter and debates like “did these two characters bang?” “That character is asexual and here’s why” “I wrote a fic that I think you might like and here’s the link. No pressure to read it though!”, not “here’s another update. Here’s another update.” “You haven’t posted in a couple of days, when are we getting an update?” “Will you read this and reblog it?”

Idk, I had this conversation the other day, and maybe I just need to accept the fact that fandom as I knew it is dead and gone. In another life, I would have really loved giggling about fics and headcanons with you all.

Anyway, can we please stop making content creators out to be the villains when they ask to be treated like human beings and not soulless machines?

[writingjourney]

I want to write, and I did a little bit when I first the fandom of Ghost a few months back. But I quickly resolved back to thinking I'm not good enough for anyone to like it and people don't even care. I know the best way is to write for myself but I depend on validation. And I don't have any range to even be seen by anyone. I know I have to put myself out there but it's so difficult when you're afraid of the world out there. :(

I feel you anon, it IS difficult to put yourself out there, to build and maintain a presence online – especially if you're dealing with things like social anxiety and self-doubt. You have to ignore your mean inner voice A LOT and convince yourself not to delete that fic, not to talk yourself down constantly, not to compare yourself to others who post similar things. Believe me, no matter how many people follow you or how many notes or hits your work gets, this never goes away if you are an introspective, insecure person by nature.

I'm not sure if I'm the right person for it, but I think I can try to give you some words of wisdom. I feel like the hard truth is that being creative has to (mainly) come from intrinsic motivations or you will not keep it up long-term. You have to love the story your writing, it has to be something you are happy to work on no matter if you post it or not. Extrensic motivation like notes/comments etc. can definitely help to get you to create more often but if your inner drive is not there it just takes you so much more effort to push through the insecurities. The best kind of writing is the story that gives you incredible brain rot because you're obsessed with it, not the one that gets you the most notes online. And I say this (I know) as someone who is lucky to get a lot of validation from others these days, especially friends.

The truth however is that it takes work and dedication like any other craft to get better at writing which also helps to get more confident, something an online audience cannot give you because it depends on factors beyond your control like fandom size/platform/ships etc. When I started writing fic on this blog in 2016 I was a tiny small account with not a lot of followers who was new to writing in English as well as the world of fanfic, I didn't have the best skills yet and posted x reader fics for maybe 10-30 notes if I was lucky, even for bigger fandoms. As time went by I improved, I found mutuals and a small community of writers but then eventually I abandoned this blog for a couple years because what happened is that I started writing for other people and not myself anymore. Taking requests, finishing stories for characters I was no longer into etc. It KILLED my creativity and I went back to other work beyond fanfic.

I went on to posting my fics exclusively to Ao3 when I did write because my motivation was the story itself, being obsessed with whatever media I had found, and not being popular in the fandom. I knew that was not gonna happen because my obsessions fluctuated and I was just a beginner writer who had a long journey ahead (still have I feel like). But the lack of pressure helped to actually get me to write. Instead of listening to what others want you have to allow your creativity to take you places and write the stories that inspire you, hop between fandoms and characters and tropes and be self-indulgent as fuck even if maybe two people read it. Finding writer friends REALLY helps with that.

I returned to tumblr for Ghost in an attempt to find community, not even really to stay here for so long, and I happened to be lucky to get here at a time where the fandom was VERY active and people were reading a LOT of fanfiction. Right now the fandom is pretty much dead compared to that time. When I came here I tried to be active because that is what I knew from when I started back in 2016, writers supporting writers, readers sharing a variety of works, multifandom accounts hopping all over the place, lots of activity not even bound to one bubble but across fandoms. I read other people's works on here and shared it, supported the new favorite writers I found, befriended people who I thought are cool etc. and I continue to do that now.

I feel like that is the key to having fun in fandom really. Because while a few people scout or follow the hashtags you post your work in most people will not bother digging through them (tumblr search is just horrible) but rely on what the people they follow reblog and put on their dash. People won't see your works if you stay inside your tight little corner and never interact with the community because there is no algorithm pushing it out. To be supportive is the best way to receive support and the best way to support others is to do so genuinely and not with the intention to get back. I KNOW this can be sooooo scary but I have only ever found it to be very rewarding in the end because kindness is contagious, you reap what you sow etc etc. I really hope you can find the courage to put yourself out there and listen to your creativity and let it carry you places instead of letting the outside world affect how you approach your creativity.

I hope this helped in some shape or form. I know it is all easier said than done but a LOT of people are sooooo kind and supportive if you show them that you are out there and care about them as well, I promise! ♡

[zeroducks-2]

20 Questions for Fic Writers!

@sproutwings tagged me in this, thanks Sandrine ♥ I'll give it a try!

How many works do you have on AO3? on the Zero_Ducks account, 37 (+1 unrevealed).

What’s your total A03 word count? 393,092

What fandoms do you write for? Only DCU at the moment.

What are your top five fics by kudos? (all of these are Sladick!)

You could be my luck, with 394 Kudos. REALLY? Oh well that's a discovery lol. Dick gets pollened and hides in Slade's safehouse because it's the closest he can get to, hoping Slade isn't home. Slade is in fact right there.

Darling Little Things, with 355 kudos. Also quite the surprise! Omegaverse in which Dick is pregnant with Slade's pup, but hasn't told him out of fear Slade wouldn't want them. Everything goes surprisingly well.

Served Cold, with 338 kudos. This one was expected since it's more than a single chapter and was a pretty anticipated entry of my Sladick series. Slade takes his revenge on a hit that Dick ruined.

lie in your bed the way you made it, with 327 kudos. LMAO. I love this fic. It has to be one of the filthiest I've ever written. A pwp in which Dick took a blow intended for one of Slade's marks, and not wanting him to die, Slade has to take care of his sorry ass.

Slade's lucky day, with 301 kudos. My very first Sladick fanfic! Slade is on a mission in Montenegro, and Dick is too. They end up accidentally and less accidentally helping each other, with some strings attached.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Always. Fandom remains stagnant without interaction, and that's on writers too, not just on readers. Also if I post a fic (which doesn't happen often compared to how many fics I write) is because I want to talk about it with other people!

What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Among those I posted on AO3, probably Losing Game. It's an Eobarryiris fic, and I imagined a potential way it could go well but it ends on a very angsty note (it's a timeloop situation in which they have no idea how to break it, and one of them keeps dying in every cycle so they keep resetting it because they can't let him go).

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? It has to be Darling Little Things, it ends on a very fluffy note.

Do you get hate on your fic? Not regularly but it happened. What hate gets there is promptly deleted, trolls are not to be fed.

Do you write smut? My smut has plot sometimes.

Do you write crossovers? No, the most I can do is "characters from X universe are now in Y universe", but I don't mash-up characters.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yeah. Long story. Bad ending. It was years ago though.

Have you ever had a fic translated? A couple of times, not from the Zero_Ducks account though!

Have you ever co-written a fic? I co-write pretty often.

What‘s your all-time favourite ship? I am too ADHD to pick one. Speaking of the DC fandom (which I'm here for), Sladick and Eobarry which I'm sure doesn't come as a shock for anyone.

What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Boy I have 200+ WIPs I will never finish, and I really want to finish like 80% of them lmao. Probably Clipped. Based on the fact that I have no idea how to finish it (it's a Bad Guys Won scenario in which all them little birds are captive and in distress)

What’s your writing strengths? Smut!

What’s your writing weaknesses? Being that I'm not a native English speaker, I have a hard time writing in "styles" which penalizes the dialogues. I have no idea how to show that a character is a certain English speaking nationality, how to give them dialectic quirks, how to make them speak in an old fashioned way. I can in my native language though, and it frustrates me so much not to be able to "translate it".

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? If it's just a small line it's okay, it helps the immersion. If it's entire dialogues I don't see why, people don't understand it what's the point.

First fandom you wrote for? Possibly Spyro Gateway to Glimmer when I was 6 lmao.

Favourite fic you’ve ever written? Again strictly speaking for the Zero_Ducks account, I think it's Elegia. It's been almost two years but it holds the test of time, the emotions still feel very raw and the smut is still good (it's that one time Dick's suicidal behavior after Jason's death went a bit overboard, and Slade decided to do something about it whether Dick liked it or not).

I got to tag people now I guess! No pressure folks, it's just the law

@deepwithintheabyss @anawrites3 @waffleinator-inator @ftl-faster-than-life @ladytauria @thesandsofelsweyr and anyone who wants to do this!

[sprout-fics]

Hi I wanted to ask for some advice as to what I should do with my blog because I’m quite new to tumblr and idk who else to ask but the writers I already follow😭

I no longer want my main blog to have my cod fics on them so I created a side blog specifically for cod content. What do I do with the few fics I’ve already posted on the main blog? Should I delete them and then copy and repost them to my new blog? Or should I leave them with an edit saying I’ve moved and just reblog them so the original post is still visible on the new blog? The thing is that these few fics I’ve posted already have around 100 notes each so I don’t want to be annoying to anyone by moving.

I’m so sorry if this makes no sense. You obviously don’t have to answer this if you don’t want, I just wanted to ask someone who seems to know how tumblr works and knows what’s the norm lol. Love your stuff btw💖

Hello love! I actually encountered this same thing a while back. I have some very ancient fanfics on my main that I never moved here. (The difference being I distanced myself from that fandom so I had no need to move them)

Personally what I would do is leave a note with each fic saying 'I've moved to this new blog for my writing' so you preserve the original notes and you don't lose any nice comments or tags from others on your original posts. Plus people can still go back and re-read those fics under your original url. This way people know where to find you for future fics!

I doubt anyone would find your organization efforts annoying. People move around on blogs and change their handles all the time. If anything, I think those who enjoy your writing would be disappointed if they found your fics to vanish into the ether if you deleted them, and they couldn't remember your url so as to figure out where you went.

There is no norm for how to do these things, and ultimately it's your decision how to go about this. I'm just offering my opinion in regards to how I would do it. You're free to move/change things any way you please because at the end of the day- it's your blog! You are free to curate your space however it makes you most comfortable ❤️