#WHAT ARE THE SYSTEM TAGS ON THIS GOD DAMN WEBSITE

[unagrancantidaddepanes]

hi guys pretending to be a singlet sucks so heres a drawing i did of my WIFE :)

OTHER SYSTEMS !!!!!! REVEAL YOURSELVES !!!!!!!!!!!!! LET US BE FRIENDS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

this is actually so embarrassing but i only started being attracted to snufkin (the character) AFTER i started being attracted to snufkin (MY WIFE <3) AND NOW I CANT WATCH MOOMINVALLEY WITHOUT GOING CRAZY BECAUSE THAT GOD DAMN HOMELESS GUY LOOKS LIKE MY WONDERFUL SILLY WIFE LIKE HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO DEAL WITH THAT WHY DOES HE LOOK LIKE MY WIFE Y AHORA HAY UN DOBLAJE ESPAÑOL???? NO PUEDO, AHORA ESE VAGABUNDO ESTÁ HABLANDO ESPAÑOL, DE VERDAD SOLO ESTÁ COPIANDO A MI ESPOSA /J anyways yea guys i love my wife snufkin sm look at him pls :) 

[harmonyfriends]

every now and then this fucking website recommends us a random post that happens to come with "endos dni" "fuck endos" tags on it even when the post has nothing to do with that and it is always so infuriating every time.

to those who don't know what that means because they aren't a terminally online plural system, "endo" is short for "endogenic system", which means any plural system that isn't formed by trauma — basically, these people think there's only one correct way to be plural and are bigoted towards people with other experiences.

and god damn it fucking pisses me off so much every fucking time. it's such an ugly exclusionary thing, and while I'm inclined to give some forgiveness because, to be frank, like most DNI bullshit, it's mostly kids, it still riles me up. you hate the idea of non-traumagenic plurality so much you have to remind people of it on everything you post? jesus.

I think part of the reason it bothers me is that I wonder how people can even be so sure about what their system origin is in the first place. traumagenic plurality is about severe childhood trauma happening so early that it was before your sense of self could properly integrate (which is usually around 8 or 9 years old iirc?) — so early that, from our perspective, it's impossible to know who we would have turned out to be otherwise.

plurality is a complex interaction between neurodivergence and environment… we actually disagree, within the harmony friends, about whether or not changing those events would have caused us to turn out not plural or not. this one writing this believes us to be traumagenic in nature. but I have nothing against the friends in here that believe we would have been plural no matter what. in fact I kinda find something a little romantic to the notion… even though I don't find it very realistic, myself.

anyway if I have any advice or whatever it's this: don't let your origin define you. you are so much more than your childhood trauma (or lack thereof, if you're lucky) — you're who you are now, and that's amazing and beautiful; you've got nothing to prove to anyone, and especially have no mandate to broadcast your trauma history to strangers in order to be accepted for yourselves.

[ridibulous]

Judas / Choir

Judas: host & body name // Choir: system name (Choir System)

(link for more information to be updated...)

♫♪.ılılıllılılı. ♫♪

— body is nineteen years old.

— collectively he/him and (plural, when referring to multiple parts/the system as a whole) they/them. alternate between first-person pronouns i/me and we/us.

— body is an intersex transgender man, 1 year on testosterone, top surgery on the horizon (October 30, 2024). gender identity can be most simply described as binary nonbinary.

— neurodivergent. autistic. DID system.

♫♪.ılılıllılılı. ♫♪

psst... this is only a basic intro. click below for lots more!

Boundaries and BYF info.

— Feel free to send us asks or DM us. We like messages.

— If we do anything wrong... please just tell us? We're constantly trying to learn and grow for the better.

— We block liberally to curate our online experience. If you make us uncomfortable we won't hesitate to do so, even if you aren't on our below "DNI".

— Folk who apply to our DNI can and will get blocked, including when found in our notifications.

— We also read all of our notifications. Expect the possibility of a response as well when you say something, whether it be in your askbox, a reblog of your reblog, whatever.

— Please do not interrogate us about our full background, especially if you are a stranger. We literally don't know it all, and more importantly we don't owe you it.

— For the love of humanity if you have a complex typing quirk and are able to, please be willing to translate it into plain English. Obligatory "typing quirks are inherently ableist and refusing to translate is being actively ableist". As a Homestuckie I can understand leetspeak-esque quirks, but if yours is so esoteric I can't easily gleam what your message says it will get on my nerves.

— Please please please understand that if you misinterpret my posts as a stranger I might get passive aggressive. I try not to, this is unfortunately the piss on the poor website, but god damn please use your reading comprehension for a minute before saying something on our posts.

— We personally do not like being called a "plural". If you enjoy the label, cool. Please don't use it on us.

— Parts/alters (we use both terms interchangably) don't have signoffs by default just cause we don't really see the point here. Everyone who's willing & allowed on here uses tumblr as they wish.

— All system posts we make (should) have "#endos dni" and "#endos fuck off" as a warning for pro-endo folk. We don't blame you if you liked or reblogged from somewhere else, but our boundaries are still as such.

— We don't usually tag triggers (or much of anything) especially on reblogs. We just hit the funny green button unless the content is particularly compelling enough for us to tag.

— In general we're really sloppy with tags. We've had this blog for years on end, and don't feel particularly inclined to sideblogs. This also means you might stumble upon old posts and/or opinions if you go through our blog. Sorry for any cringe you find /lh

DNI

more of a broad "who we ignore/block" list. I mean seriously, is a flesh & blood TERF going to listen to this?

in other news, if you don't apply to any of the below, you should follow us! /not forced

— Any type of bigot.

— Radical feminists in general. This includes TERFs, T"I"RFs, SWERFs, febfems, transradfems/baeddels, etc. We include them under our "bigot" label, but just being thorough.

— Any flavor of right-wing nonsense. (conservative, alt-right, neonazi, pro-life, antivax, etc.)

— Anti-Furry. Your life is boring as shit.

— Anti-therian/otherkin/objectum, or any adjacent label.

— Anti-self-shipping, self-inserts, and OC x Canon. Your life is ALSO boring as shit.

— Heavily in pro/anti-ship discourse. We are not proship, antiship, or neutral. Do not force any of these labels on us, we do not engage with the discourse seriously. It should be common sentiment that pedophilia(+related i.e necro, zoo, etc), incest, abuse etc. that's publicly romanticized/fetishized as normal or okay is wrong. TL;DR,

[ID: A tumblr screenshot with a grainy filter overlay. It's a post by @/bloodenjoyer posted on May 25, 2023 that reads as follows, "i'm not “pro ship” or “anti ship” i live in the real world + have media literacy + am grossed out by pedophilia which is all pretty standard fare for people who life in the real world actually". /End ID.]

— Queer exclusionists & infighters (truscum/transmed, anti-mspec monos, anti-contradictory identities, believes aspec aren't inherently queer, doesn't believe transandrophobia is real, etc.)

— Not normal about intersex people. Sex is not binary. You cannot "transition to become intersex". Intersex doesn't just mean "both sets of genitalia". AFAB doesn't equal female and AMAB doesn't equal male. Be a better advocate.

— Pro-radqueer/transx identities.

— Non-traumagenic systems and supporters. Neutral folk with a pro-endo leaning are on thin ice. Everyone else is cool.

— Pro-contact paraphiles. (ex. pedophilia, zoophilia, necrophilia)

— Believe in "narc abuse" or other cluster B "abuses".

— Anti-age regression/age dreaming (agere/agedre) or pet regression/pet dreaming (petre/petdre).

— Anti-well researched self-diagnosis.

— Believe RAMCOA/OEA isn't real or purposefully believe conspiracy theories & other disinformation related to it.

— Porn blogs who post about hard CNC/rape kink, gore/guro, DDLG & other ageplay (agere/agedre are inherently SFW to us.), raceplay, fat fetish/feederism, and detransition kink.

— If you don't know how to use the block button yourself and shit bricks in our notes/askbox over something trivial. /hj

♫♪.ılılıllılılı. ♫♪

To be updated whenever we feel like it.

[rjalker]

So you don't have to reblog the shit fucking original post.

drafthearse said July 26th 2023:

if you as a normal tumblr user go around flagging posts for mature labels you are A Fucking Cop

the-snadger said July 26th 2023:

“I personally don’t like it so I want to make it so no one can see it” sounds an awful lot like conservative censorship. Same tune, different band. Now is a good time for a reminder that Tumblr has a very useful tag blocking system!!! Maybe use that like an adult instead of reporting any post that makes you upset.

Rjalker said July 26th 2023:

Wow. So are we just pretending that this website has absolutely zero problem with people refusing to tag NSFW things properly?

I am filtering every single NSFW tag I can think of. But every single fucking time I go to the trans or nonbinary tags there's porn and fetish shit completely untagged.

If you people don't want your posts to have community labels for mature content, then actually fucking tag them properly the first time.

What we are not going to do is pretend that everyone on this site always tags their posts properly and the fault is simply on the people who don't blacklist the tags….

Because I am literally fucking blacklisting all the tags I can think of. And I will still see explicitly sexual posts because people aren't tagging their shit correctly.

Or you know, posts with graphic pictures of dead animals or art because no one wants to tag their shit as gore.

If you make NSFW posts, fucking tag them as NSFW, or NSFT. You do not get to literally refuse to do this most basic fucking thing and then get mad when your post gets a community label.

"try filtering tags instead of reporting posts that upset you" Yeah, that'd be great fucking advice if people actually tagged their posts properly, but we all fucking know they don't. It's 2023. We are not lying about one of the most basic fucking problems on this gods damned website.

[kernom]

little rant about something

a talk about systems and did below, and syscourse and the things between endogenics and anti endogenics, i'm gonna get heated down below and i can't tag everything that's related to this post because god damn there's so much and i can't remember all of them so do not read if you're having a good day, i don't wanna bog you down with my nonsense… :(

okay, i never said it before on this account, but i do have some sort of headsystem in my mind. like there are individuals that lived different lives before they came into me, who is currently typing on this post.

i will not get into that can of worms simply because i kinda don't wanna turn this blog into a negative ranter's page and i don't really feel comfortable sharing my headmates in this website… but i gotta get this out of the head.

occasionally, i just wanna see what tumblr's systems are doing, but then i get reminded that there's literally a war between endos and anti endos… and they clog up what i wanna see, which is just relatable things that happen that aren't quite possible if i were just one person.

then there are all these darn tags that are there because if heard correctly, some assholes that really like hurting people keep showing up on various tags and that's like, why. why the fuck are you doing that. don't you have other things to do??? and in addition to that, there are just some extreme takes from either sides that make me feel guilty for even looking at either of them…

i've already blocked the "X fuck off" tags because the people using them are very likely strongly opinionated on the other side and the syscourse tag… for being, well, discourse, but… sigh idk what else to do since i'm just a casual tumblr user that just reblogs #crazy shit i found and place it on my page, i don't wanna have to constantly dig over so many pages of warfare while i'm going to the store for the relics. i just-

i kind of get both sides of the equation but i don't feel like having to fight my moral stance every step of the way… so i just wanna find a way to view those things without seeing that stuff.

that should be it for now… please do not attack me for this istg i can't keep going like this. OTL

[that-spider-witch]

On “Dead” Cultures and Closed Spiritual Practices: Why Colonialism Is Still A Problem.

Let me start this by saying that, as far as my knowledge of Paganism and Polytheism as a whole goes, I’m what the internet witch community calls a “Baby Witch”. I’m stating this out of the gate because I know there will be lots of people, including witches who have more experience on the craft than me, who might decide to ignore what I have to say based on that fact alone, stating that I’m not knowledgeable enough to give my opinion about this.

Here’s the kicker: I’m a ‘baby witch’, yes, but I’m also a twenty-six year old Venezuelan woman. I’m an adult. I’m Latina. I’m a Christian-raised Pagan,but I’m also a Latinoamerican woman over all other things including that. I grew up on this culture, these are my roots. It is because of this background than I’m writing this post today.

Looking through the “Paganism” and “Witchcraft” tags of this website, I’ve seen a few posts throwing indigenous deities and spirits’ names around on lists alongside deties of open cultures. Yes, you can know better by doing your own research and not going by what just a random Tumblr user wrote on one post (as I hope its the case with everyone on this website), but the fact that pagan beginners are still getting fed misinformation is still worrisome to me.

There’s nothing like reading a so-called expert putting Ixchen (Maya), Xolotl (Nahuatl) and Papa Legba (Vodou) on the same damn list as Norse, Hellenic and Kemetic deities and tagging it on the tags aimed at beginners who might not know better to truly ruin your morning. I’m not mentioning user names here: If you know then you know.

To quote @the-illuminated-witch on her very good post about Cultural Appropriation: 

“Cultural appropriation is a huge issue in modern witchcraft. When you have witches using white sage to “smudge” their altars, doing meditations to balance their chakras, and calling on Santa Muerte in spells, all without making any effort to understand the cultural roots of those practices, you have a serious problem.

When trying to understand cultural appropriation in witchcraft, it’s important to understand the difference between open and closed magic systems. An open system is one that is open to exchange with outsiders — both sharing ideas/practices and taking in new ones. In terms of religion, spirituality, and witchcraft, a completely open system has no restrictions on who can practice its teachings. A closed system is one that is isolated from outside influences — usually, there is some kind of restriction on who can practice within these systems.”

A counter-argument I’ve seen towards this when someone wants to appropiate indigenous deities and spirits is to use the “dead culture” argument: Extinct cultures are more eligible for use by modern people of all stirpes. It is a dead culture and dead religion. It would be one thing if some part of the culture or religion was still alive, being used by modern descendants, but the culture died out in its entirety and was replaced, right? They were all killed by colonization, they are ancient history now, right?

Example: “If white people are worshipping Egyptian deities now, then why can’t I worship [Insert Aborigen Deity Here]?”

To which I have two things to say:

Ancient Egypt’s culture was open and imperialistic, meaning they wanted their religion to be spread. This is why Kemetism is not Cultural Appropriation, despite what some misinformed people might tell you. Similar arguments can also be made for the Hellenic and the Norse branches of Paganism, both practiced by people who aren’t Greek/Norse.

Who are you to say which cultures are “dead” and which are not?

Religious practices such as Vodou and Santería certainly aren’t dead, not that it keeps some Tumblr users from adding Erzuli as a “goddess” on their Baby Witch post, something that actual Vodou practitioners have warned against.

Indigenous cultures such as the Maya and the Mapuche aren’t dead, despite what the goverment of their countries might tell you. The Mapuche in particular have a rich culture and not one, but two witchcraft branches (The Machi and the Kalku/Calcu). Both are closed pagan practices that the local Catholic Church has continuously failed to assimilate and erase, though sadly not for lack of trying:

“The missionaries who followed the Spanish conquistadors to America incorrectly interpreted the Mapuche beliefs regarding both wekufes and gualichos. They used the word wekufe as a synonym for ideas of the devil, demons, and other evil or diabolical forces. This has caused misunderstanding of the original symbolism and has changed the idea of wekufe right up to the present day, even amongst the Mapuche people.”

For context, the Wefuke are the Calcu’s equivalent of the Familiar, as well as reportedly having more in common with the Fae than with demons anyway.

This and other indigenous religions are Closed because it is wrong for foreigners to just come and take elements from marginalized groups whom are still fighting to survive and that they weren’t born into. To just approppiate those things would be like spitting in their faces, treating them and their culture like a commodity, a shiny thing, a unique thing to be used like paint to spruce up your life or be special.

I know some of you are allergic to the word “Privilege”, but on this situation there really ain’t a better word to explain it. You weren’t born here, you don’t know what it is like, you are only able to see the struggle from an outsider’s point of view.

If a belief or practice is part of a closed system, outsiders should not take part in it. And with how many practices there are out there which are open for people of all races, there is really no excuse for you to do it.

Why Colonization Is Not “Ancient History”

If you have kept reading all this so far, you are probably wondering “Ok, but what does Colonization has to do with any of this?”

The answer? Everything.

With the general context of culture appropriation out of the way, let me tell you about why the whole “dead culture” argument rubs me the wrong way: Here in Venezuela, we have a goddess called Santa Maria de la Onza, or Maria Lionza for short, whom’s idol statue I have been using to illustrate this little rant. If you happen to know any Spanish, you might recognize the name as a derivative of Santa Maria, aka the Virgin Mary, and you are mostly correct: Her true indigenous name is theorized to have been Yara.

And I say “theorized” because it is a subject of hot debate whether she was really ever called that or not: Her original name, the name by which she was adored and worshipped by our ancestors, might have been forever lost to history.

That’s the legacy of colonization for you: Our cultures were stolen from us, and what they couldn’t erase they instead tried to assimilate. Our ancestors were enslaved, their lands and homes stolen, their artwork and literary works destroyed: The Maya and the Aztec Empire were rich in written works of all kinds, ranging from poetry to history records to medicine, and the Spaniards burned 99% of it, on what is probably one of the most tragic examples of book burning in history and one that people rarely ever talk about. 

People couldn’t even worship their own gods or pass their knowledge of them to their children. That’s why Maria Lionza has such a Spanish Catholic-sounding name, and that’s why we can’t even be sure if Yara was her name or not: The Conquistadors couldn’t steal our goddess from us, so they stole her name instead. Catholics really have a thing with trying to assimilate indigenous goddesses with the Virgin Mary, as they tried to do the same with the Pachamama.

On witchy terms, I’d define Maria Lionza as both a deity and a land spirit: Most internet pages explaining her mention the Sorte mountain as her holy place, but it is more along the lines that she is the mountain. 

You’d think that, with Venezuela and other Latinoamerican countries no longer being colonies, we’d be able to worship our own deities including her, right?

As far as a lot of Catholics seem to think and act, apparently we are not.

The Catholics here like to go out of their way to shame us, to call us “cultists”, to ostracize us, with a general call to “refrain from those pagan beliefs” because they go against the Catholic principles. Yes, the goddess with the Catholic-sounding name, a name she happens to share with a Catholic deity, apparently goes “against Catholic principles”. You really can’t make this shit up. (Linked article is in Spanish)

This is just an act of colonization out of many, of not wanting to stop until the culture they want to destroy is gone. Don’t believe for a second that this is really their God’s will or anything like that, they are just trying to finish what years of enslavement and murder couldn’t. They might not be actively killing us anymore, but they still want us dead.

So no, colonization is not some thing that has long passed and now only exist on history textbooks: It is still happening to this day. It is by treating it as old history that they can keep doing it, and it is by pushing the narrative that our indigenous cultures are “dead cultures” that they try to erase our heritage.

Because we are not dead. We are still here, we are alive, we have survived and we’ll keep on surviving, and our gods and goddesses are not yours to take.

¡Chao! 🐈

[lochrannn]

Tbh it's not possible to make a perfect website for fic publishing. There's always going to be some issue and I am not 100% fan of what we have now but it's the best...at least for now. Maybe somebody will create something slightly better in like 5 years.

Oh anon, if I was giving off the impression that I don't absolutely love love love love love Ao3, then I really wasn't making myself clear 😅

If say the fact that basically everybody who is vaguely online and aware of pop culture, knows about fanfic is definitely a lot down to Ao3. Its An amazing ressource and the tagging system is literally award winning and genuinely spectacular.

If I'm honest the main gripes I have are probably more accurately directed at the god damn fandom that has sucked me into writing. Active TUA fans are genuinely few and far between, especially on Tumblr and as I've complained about a lot, my lurking on twitter has made me realise that the very vocal fans there absolutely read fic, they literally post screenshots and quotes. But do they leave a little comment? No... DX ... That's really not ao3's fault XD

[world-of-aus]

Strictly Confidential - Part 1

Warnings: 18+ Steamy Wet Dream in the first scene (it’s the dirtiest thing I've ever felt I have written lol)

Series Summary: New publicist managing Barnes CO. by day, Camgirl by night, no way the two worlds could get mixed, right?

Author’s Note: New mini-series! Super excited to kick this one off. There will be fluff, mutual pinning slow burn (squint ya eyes), and of course ANGST! As per all my series there will be a tag-list available, so if you enjoy this part and would like to be notified when newer chapters post you can send me an ask, message, or comment and i’ll have you added. Thank you for reading! Any and all writing mistakes are my own, i can only do so much editing with two tiny ghouls around me.

Find My Other Works Here: Main Masterlist

Series Masterlist

 Bucky reinforced his tight grip on Vixens writhing hips, tongue trailing up the inside of her spread thighs. Her chest heaving beneath the fingers that trailed along her exposed breasts. Vixen squirmed beneath his hold, breathy pleas falling from her lips as her hips rolled, searching for the delicious pleasure, only he could bring her. 

Bucky smacked at her hip, vixen's frantic movement faltering, “quit moving or I stop all together, you wouldn’t want me to stop now, would you?”  

A whine falls from her throat, her hips falling back to the sheets below her, head pressing into the silk pillow as she waits with baited breath, “that’s my good girl,” he murmurs trailing his hand down the side of your hip, fingers catching on your lace thong. He trailed his way down the lace, index finger pressing the lace into her slick folds, a low whine spilling from her lips, “please,” she begged hips lifting on their own accord. 

“Please what princess?” He murmurs fingers running up and down her wet slicked panties, “fuck me, I need you to fuck me, please.”   

A groan fell from Bucky’s lips as he moved up her body, his beautiful, beautiful girl, his vixen, always so fucking responsive for him. 

He licks a trail up vixen’s stomach, body quivering beneath his tongue. He stops at her breast, tongue swirling over each one of her nipples, teeth tugging at the taut skin. A hiss falls from her lips, a moan accompanying the sound, her back arches off the bed pressing her breast further into his face.  

“God doll, I could never get enough of you,” he murmurs his lips continuing their way up her skin, he settles on marking up her neck while his fingers hook on the inside of her panties, juices coating his finger as he pulls the material to the side, his cock pressing against her folds. 

“Please,” she moans, “please give it to me,” she murmurs body arching, lips finding his in the low lamp light of his room. Vixens teeth are tugging at his lower lip pulling, a hiss falling from his lips, his hips rolling forward cock pushing into her as he buries himself inside of her warm heat. A low groan falls from her lips, head falling back exposing her neck to him, “always so tight angel, fit like a glove,” he hisses head burying itself in vixen’s neck, tongue dragging over her sweat slicked skin, hips rolling at the sensation. 

He’s pulling back only to hammer back into her, the thrust driving you up the sheets, a squeal of pleasure leaves her lips, her legs hooking around his waist to get him closer, “you were made for me, made to take me,” he grunts teeth nipping at vixens ear, “and fuck do you take me well,” he growled cock pounding into her. 

He fucks into vixen hard and fast, hips setting a bruising pace, his lips find hers, mouth drinking in her throaty moans. A gasp falls from vixen's lips, as she pulls away the need for air becoming too much, “Fuck, just like that,” she moaned low in her throat, “please, don’t stop, p-please don’t stop,” she whined back arching off the bed as her orgasm consumed her. 

A growl tore from Bucky’s lips, “that’s right baby, cum for daddy, cum all over daddy’s cock,” 

A cry, tore from vixens lips, her hands finding there way to the back of his head, fingers curling around his wavy locks bringing his lips crashing to hers. He licked his way into her mouth, tongue tangling with hers, “cum for daddy” she moaned, fingers tugging on his hair. Bucky moaned hips moving quicker, thrusts faltering as he chased after his own release. 

“come on daddy, let me feel it, cum for me,” she moaned, licking a strip up his neck, her tongue on his skin was all it took to have him losing himself. 

“Oh fuck.”

Bucky eyes shot open, a gasp leaving his lips, hips thrusting off the bed, his cock leaking cum, a wet stain appearing on his cotton boxers.  

“h-holy fuck,” he grunted falling back onto the bed, eyes squeezed shut as the aftershocks of his orgasm coursed through him. He’s running a hand through his hair, eyes slipping open as he glanced around his room, this had been the third night she had visited his dreams, not that him, or his dick were complaining.

Bucky eyes catch sight of his surface pro on his nightstand, the Xmodels website staring back at him, he supposed his frequent visits to Xmodels to see her had been the reasoning behind her frequenting his dreams as much as she had, but fuck if she wasn’t intoxicating, and he only knew her from behind that of his laptop screen.

He hadn’t meant to stumble upon her or the website to begin with but when the topic of Camgirls had been brought up at one of there weekly stops at the bar they frequented just before their weekends, well curiosity had killed the cat and he couldn’t help himself.

He had searched through various girls, a scoff at the time leaving his lips as he thought back to how highly Sam and surprisingly Steve had spoken of some of the girls on here. He had almost given up but decided to try to scroll through a few more profiles. He stumbled towards the end of his search, and he wasn’t sure if it was her picture or the name that enticed him more to click on vixens profile, but he would never look back, the way Vixen worked her profile, the content she provided her viewers, he was hooked immediately.

He couldn’t help himself as he reached over, fingers tapping at the screen of his surface pro, Vixens profile greeting him, the latest chat showing it had now ended. God he couldn’t get her out of his system, silky voice, her body, the way her fingers looked slipping into her slick folds, her breathy moans god, he groaned dick twitching in his already stained boxers.  

His phone ringing on his nightstand next to his laptop pulls him from his stupor, a groan but this time one of annoyance leaves his lips as he grabs the device sliding the green button across the screen.

“this better be good Rogers,” he mumbles into the line, throwing the sheets from his body.

Steve chuckles on the other end of the line, but he sounds anything other than amused, “nothing I ever tell you is good,” he answers, “but if you must know you and I were supposed to conduct a meeting with your newest publicist.”

A sigh is leaving Bucky’s lips as he slips from his bed, feet carrying him to the bathroom, “I really don’t see the need for a publicist Rogers what exactly is the poor-”

“Her names y/n,” Steve murmurs and Bucky can practically feel the eye roll through the phone.

“I knew that,” Bucky muttered pulling off his cum stained underwear; cum cooled and dried on his skin, he pulled a face, “all I’m saying is I don’t think I need a publicist, why would one even be suggested?” He questions moving towards the shower, fingers moving the knobs as water streams down from the faucet head.

“Are you really just getting in the shower?” Steve questions incredulously, ignoring Buckys question altogether.

“It’s what I do every morning, what’s it to you punk?” Bucky chuckles putting his phone on speaker as he steps into the shower.

Steve groans, and Bucky can see him with a hand to his head, eyes shut in agitation, “oh I don’t know Buck maybe it’s the small fact that it’s 9:30 in the morning and you were supposed to be in your office two hours ago.

Bucky's eyes widen, feet nearly slipping from under him as he scrambles to grab his phone to see indeed that it was 9:30, and not 7:00, the actual time he should have been up.

“son of a bitch!” he growls grabbing his soap, squeezing an unnecessary amount on his palm as he worked it over his body, specifically the part that he’d gotten dirty from this morning's dream.

“So, I take it I'll see you in your office in an hour?” Steve questions.

“Wouldn’t dream of being anywhere else,” Bucky shouts out over the sound of the water running over his body.

“He thinks Steve’s hung up but then his voice is ringing out over the speaker again, “and please be on your best behavior, you’re meeting your new publicist, and don’t be an ass and run her off like you did the other one,” Steve warns.

“No promises, but I'll try, now hang up the fucking phone so I can get moving you’re making me waste more time.”

“Uhuh,” Steve murmurs a chuckle sounding on his end, ��see you in the office pal, don’t be late.

Jokes on him, he already was.

Bucky arrived at the office fifteen till the hour that Steve had given him, he was sweaty, and a little out of breath, but that was likely due to the workorder for fixing the only working elevator in this damn building not being submitted. He hasn’t even stepped foot onto the floor and Steve is already there coffee in hand, leaning against the receptionist desk.

Bucky holds the eye roll at seeing Steve smirk, “you know I thought you wouldn’t make it, was certain you’d go past the hour.” he grins passing Bucky his coffee.

“I’m beginning to regret ever saving your scrawny ass from your back alley fights, they should have punched you around some more, seems they didn’t get your head back in place after the first punch.” Bucky grumbles, grabbing the coffee with greedy hands as he moved towards his office Steve trailing beside him.

“You and I both know I could have taken them, you just happened to come around at a bad time,” Steve grins.

Bucky can’t help but to look at his best friend now, he’s definitely no longer that same scrawny teen that would pick fights with guys twice his size, no, now he was the one who was being picked on, by guys smaller than him.

“You’ve come along way punk I can tell you that much,” Bucky chuckles taking a seat at his desk, “so about this publicist, tell me again why it is I need her, I didn’t need the first one, why are you all so pushy about this one.”

Steve’s waving a finger at him as he takes a seat across from Bucky, “that’s one thing I've always liked about you, and I'm sure the very reason your father passed his business down to you, as soon as you're at work, it's strictly business for you,” Bucky rolls his eyes, a grin pulling at his lips, “anyway,” Steve drawls, “ the reason we  have suggested getting you a publicist is to build up the company,” Bucky raises a brow, a gesture for Steve to continue. “Having someone around you to learn about the company, to see what it takes to run this company, to know the company inside and out, hell it would be good for us, we could bring more people in, have more people know about us, know about you.”

“I think enough people already know enough about me,” Bucky mumbles behind a sip of his hot drink.

Steve rolls his eyes, “the only you they know, is the one who has a girl leaving his home every other morning, and that’s not a publicist work that’s well, I don’t need to elaborate on who’s doing it is.”

Bucky waves a hand at him, taking another long sip of his coffee, an ‘ah’ leaving his lips, “I honestly don’t see the need for one, I think our company is thriving and doing just fine without one,” Steve’s face falls lightly, “BUT, if it’ll keep you guys off my back, I'll meet her,” Steve’s picking up again, “you won’t regret this trust me she’s-”

“I only said I would meet her Steve;” Bucky buts in, “I didn’t say anything about actually letting her work under me, like I said it’s completely unnecessary.”

Steve’s rolling his eyes, as he stands, “well I guess its something,” he replies, “I’ll go get her.”

Bucky raises a brow at his comment, “she’s already here?” he questioned.

Steve looks at Bucky from where he has his hand on his office door, “she’s been here since 8 Buck, now if you’ll excuse me, I don’t want her wasting another minute waiting for you.”

Bucky waves him off watching him depart through the office door,  he rubs at his face, he really didn’t think he needed somebody to manage the publicity of his company, he thinks it was doing just fine on its own. There was an abundance of employees, and an even higher abundance of customers, he was doing just fine, he was really only doing this to get Steve off his back.

Besides the last girl that Steve had tried to bring on as his publicist as well didn’t end to well, why would this one be any different?

A knock on his door, has him looking up, Steve popping his head through, “Mr. Barnes, I would like to introduce you to y/n.”

Bucky's breath catches in his throat eyes going slightly wide, pants slightly constricting as he takes in your form gliding in through his door.

Fuck it couldn’t be.

Vixen.

Part 2

WordofAUS Forever Tag-list: @cap-n-stuff-main​ @bucky-cinnamonroll-barnes​ @kseniiafirebrace @sideeffectsofyou

[brokemylegflippingthefirewall]

*This is absolutely a fic promotion, but plz hear me out on the discourse part too

So, self inserts and original characters, the worst fanfic catgeory (fanfiction.net literally says that in one of its fic groupings, and I'm pretty sure the number of views on any fanfic website says the same).

TLDR- Yes, I agree that this stereotype carries truth, but I do think SIs and OCs have more potential to be explored, and the stigma surrounding these labels is blocking that. And oh god I just want to know so badly if this is the deal with the work I'm currently writing or if I genuinely just can't write well.

The longer version- (this was written quite late into the night/ I'm in Singapore/, and might not be so well organized, I apologize for that.)

To what extent is this stigma "justified"? I mostly use AO3 for reading fics, and when I see the OC/SI tag, the thing is....I came to look for fics about canon characters and might not have the wish to invest my time in taking in a new character. I understand that most people who read fanfiction would feel the same. This, I think, is more or less justified. If you came to look for a certain canon character/relationship, and you don't want to get invested in any OCs, then of course the OC/SI tag isn't for you.

But... I think that's about it. Bcs here's the thing,

1. Using the OC/SI format does NOT automatically make the fic worse in quality. Hell, I'm not even sure if the statistical "fact" that these tags generate the worst fics is true. Judging from what I've read in the tma fandom and my other past fandoms, the stuff with OC/SI isn't inherently worse or better than the rest of the fics. There are ones that are pretty normal in writing quality, and the ones where the prose is rly good, others where plot design stands out etc. Of course, there is a lot of wish fulfillment and the like, but... there's also a lot of that in fics that write about canon characters.

2. I can't really say whether a wish fulfillment "I just want to write cool scenes/fluff" fic is better or worse than a more serious fic that explores some characterization or plot point. I think stories (all stories, books, fanfic, myths, everything) exist to entertain us and make us feel things. I am not sure if writing a feel good story is any less meaningful than writing a story that brings people "deeper" thoughts and makes them feel good in some other way. And this isn't even the issue at hand, because fundamentally, writing an OC/SI or not doesn't determine what the content is about. I agree that a larger proportion of OC/SI fics tend to be more on the lighthearted side, but... so is most of the content consumed in the other tags. Readers don't seem to have a problem with feel good stories/fix it fics etc when there is no OC or SI, so I don't see why that type of fic paired with an OC/SI should be considered any less "meaningful".

3. Guys/gals, what is an OC/SI?

Yes, it is very personal, and it is very wish fulfillment, but... isn't that like a common literature thing...like in general? Look at the works that "real writers" publish, from contemporary to the classics, which writer doesn't write about themselves? Like, just off the top of my head, Les Miserables, Marius? Um, Dante's Inferno? (and that guy did not self insert into some random thing he straightup went for the Christian Canon😂 used his real name too, so Jonny I guess if you feel awkward about your MCs name you can think of Dante//Jk). But seriously, self insert and wish fulfillment is a big part of literature itself, and while there are things to be said about these tropes, if people don't have that much of a problem with them in other literature, I don't see why fanfic OC/SIs shouldn't be treated the same.

4. in relation to the last point. More specifically...

I do think that a lot of fanfiction which write about the original characters are also OC/SIs to different extents. I've read fics that depict pairings where the author and readers project heavily onto one (or more) of the characters. I've read stuff where the author uses a minor character to explore the established world building/character dynamics and it's clear that it's an SI but with the appearance of being a canon character (and yes it gets tons more views than one that's written as SI). How do I know this? Because I am one of those readers who project onto those characters, and I know why I read those fics, I know why I like them. It's because I can self insert, and feel like I am part of the story, part of the world. Isn't that something most people want to do? I mean, Universal Studios? Specific franchise themed museums? COSPLAY??? Of course that's not all there is to engaging with a story, but what's the shame in wanting to be a part of an already established world building, or want to love a wonderfully designed character? (slight tangent, but if u feel like it's bcs ur not as interesting/cool as the story's world or other characters appear to be then I can tell you with certainty that's not true. You are very interesting and cool and absolutely deserve to be part of a fantasy world.) Isn't that a big part of why "real literature" is written and read as well? So... what's the problem with being like, okay, I'm just gonna insert myself into the world now, through this original character? Of course, I'm not asking for people who prefer to write strictly in canon characters to change that. What I mean to say is, writing it in the form of an OC/SI, doesn't make it a lot different from other fics, or hell, from classic literature even.

I think a potential problem might be the feeling that you are taking too much creative liberty with something that is established canon, by having your own character directly interact with it. But, um, can't the same thing be said if you take a canon character, and then proceed to project heavily onto them? Like, a big part of why I don't feel comfortable writing just canon characters is that I know I'm clearly projecting and it feels awkward to rewrite an already established character to explore my own thoughts/desires. I would rather just straightup design a new character. (this is all just personal feelings, I haven't thought enough about this to make any kind of argument here. And of course, the main reason is I can't trust myself to write canon characters that don't ooc in some way so having one as my protag might kill me with my own awkwardness. )

5. the potential.

Now this is looking far ahead because I'm not sure how much our current system for distribution of knowledge & copyright can allow it. But damn. The OC/SI thing has a lot of potential. There is one thing that makes it different from writing in canon characters, and that is the way it opens up a clear space for you to add your own experience into the story. When exploring your own world view through the lense of an already established world, or vice versa, so much can be revealed about both, perhaps even bringing to light aspects of the narrative the author hadn't previously seen. We all know this feeling, it's when we ramble on about one of our stories or worlds to a friend, and they point something out, and we're like ooooh that makes a lot of sense but I hadn't thought about it before. Yea, like those moments. Stories are generally made more interesting by their interaction with many different perspectives/experiences. With OC/SI it straightup allows you to be like, okay, I'm going to engage my own experience with this fictional world/character now. I mean, isnt that also a large part of how fanfics work in general? Readers/writers bouncing symbols and experiences off each other in the form of stories? Reading about the various interpretations of canon stuff? Whats the problem with tagging it as it is? I'm just thinking about the fics that could have been written as OC/SI and explored the story in some fascinating way which weren't written at all or were discontinued bcs the number of views discouraged those authors. (I feel that with my current work as well, though I have already written half of it and the remaining half is too juicy to give up so I'll probably be completing it)

6. conclusion, sorta

I guess what I want for OC/SO fics is just the same treatment as everything else. Saw it in the tags you were searching for? Look at the teaser. Do you find it interesting? No, then very well. Yes, then click in and take a look. Do you like the writing style? Are you getting into the narrative?... etc. You know, like, same standards you would have for any other kind of fic. Not feeling like you want to read about a new character? Cool, no problem at all, click away. But I do not think that the current difference in number of views is just based on whether readers are interested in reading about a new character or not. In fact, that's what I want it to be. Show me that "true" difference, the one without the stigma behind it, because, as the same goes for every kind of stigmatized community, you're not receiving the proportionate amount of positive feedback, but what's worse is you can't even trust the criticism you receive. If no one engages, or someone gives a negative feedback, how am I supposed to know if it's because my writing is bad? or my teaser wasn't interesting? or my character was badly written/designed? Or if it was to a certain extent, bcs of the stigma? I do want criticism, of course I do, it's the first step to every improvement, and I would love it if I could get feedback that I can trust. (and this brings us to the truely "oppressed" community of the fanfic world, the people who write very good but cant write interesting teasers//jk)

7. the entirely skippable straw man rant part, also the expression of my love for The Magnus Archives.

some straw man: if you like writing your own characters so much, why not just write your own story entirely? and publish it?

You think I'm not annoyed about that? Here's the thing, I LIKE THIS WORLD I READ FROM THIS BOOK/SOME OTHER FORM OF MEDIA OR WHATEVER, I like it, it's brilliant, I want to write for it, about it, be in it, think about it, read about it, engage in whatever way I can. I CAN'T just "go write my own." And who do you think is more annoyed about not being able to publish the stuff? (According to you) I have written something that is potentially publishable (thank you btw I know you don't exist and is a strawman I invented just now but I've gotta get my compliments where I can//Jk), and I can't publish it in any potentially big way (and rightfully not) because I have no copyright over the characters. I worked hard to design my character, to make the plot meaningful, and to study the original canon plot and characters so that it would all fit together (I mean, partially bcs I can't force myself to sit down and write sth that is any less complex), and I can't actually publish it where more people will read it. And of course, on top of that, even less people will feel like reading once that "original character" tag is up. Does it look like I would be here if I could "just write my own"?

(slight tangent but come on what even is "your own"? how many classic European lit books were just fanfics of each other which were all just fanfics of the Bible or Greek mythology or sth? Stories and symbols have no boundaries it's the economic system that drew those.)

Damn this got way longer than I thought and it's morning now😂 guess I ran out of space to actually promote my fic, might have to do that in a seperate post then. But to anyone who actually read up to here, I'm so sorry for wasting your time no but srsly thanks for reading all of these jumbled thoughts, and good luck with whatever you are working on at the moment, I know you're probably working on something if you're reading through these tags. And of course good luck to the tma folk we're gonna face the end together🙏. good night (I should rly go to sleep now😂)

[whumpsblog]

Hey!! Thanks for the update on TSOHL, I'd love to get on the taglist! Also: Whumpee talks to someone on an online app, only to eventually call them.. That someone is whumpee's whumper. -sol

A dialogue prompt for @broken-horn. Obviously, the events below that take place after Hanna escapes Conner’s possession. TBH I really had no idea where to take this prompt, and writing it took a while because I couldn’t figure out how it needed to end. You had me stumped! Thank you for the prompt and feel free to SEND ME MORE in the future!

Tag List: @bloodandbandages, @broken-horn, @eatyourdamnpears, @butwhatifyouwrite. If anyone wants to be added to the list or removed, contact me.

Anon: 51 Depot Street Verona NH, 13874

The first time Hanna is contacted by Anon she assumes the message was sent to the wrong person. She doesn’t give the message any more thought and she goes about her day. 

Two weeks pass and Hanna gets a second message. This one reading:

Anon: 5961 Caravan Drive Troy WA, 95832

Her gut churns and she delete the message quickly with an unsettling feeling in her gut. Recalling how the same thing happened two weeks before, she contacts Anon, informs them that they have the wrong username, and deletes the message. 

The third message comes two days later:

Anon: 7390 Apt 34 LeeHigh Ave Monroe AZ, 29402

Irritated, Hanna blocks Anon but keeps wondering about the messages through out the day.

Two morning after Hanna wakes peacefully tucked underneath Zeros warm body, who is still soundly sleeping in their bed. Its the weekend so shes sleeping in. She checks her phone for the time sleepily, and in the process of doing so she sees she has six new messages from the website. She oppens the platform and then her inbox, and this is what she finds.:  

Anon: 8374 Murray Lane Manchester OH, 14890

Anon: 3801 Jacob Street Ontario MT, 25920

Anon: 5039 Fleming Ave Newcomb VT, 49013

Anon: 8027 Plank Road Rochester NY, 12983

Anon: 7480 Old Military Road Penfield FL, 71693

Then . . .

Anon: Hello Hanna.

Hanna tells the Big Six about Anon later that day and as a group, they decide to have Hanna remove herself from the site and have Tyler monitor it in her place.  Tyler spends the next two weeks checking the chat room and nearly everyday he receives a new message. He tries hacking into the system to determine the location of the sender, but whoever it was was operating on a secure, and unfortunatly untraceable, network. With no other leads, he researches the addresses that he has recieved so far. After several hours he determines that nearly every adress was the home adress to a well-known or wealthy individual, such as politicians, celebrities, and businesspeople. 

At the end of the two weeks Tyler logs into the server and enters the chat room, only to instantly receive two new messages.

Anon: 893-502-3018.

Anon: We need to talk.

Tyler’s glasses reflect the glow of the computer screen in the dark room and the Omega sits in his chair still and supprised. The green halo around Anon’s unassigned avatar indicates that he’s still online, so Tyler gets to work. His  hands fly up to the keyboard and while impersonating Hanna, he quickly responds.

Hanna: Who is this?

The message sends and three floating dots appear in Anon’s chat box.

Anon: A friend.

Hanna: Who. Is. This?  

Anon: A friend.

This wasn’t going anywhere. Tyler tries a new approach.

Hanna: Why are you sending me these addresses? What do they mean?

He types the message quickly and hits send.

Anon: They’re gifts. Presents for my love.

‘What the fuck?’ Tyler thinks to himself. There’s a momentary break before Tyler receives two more messages.

Anon: They’re locations of Omegas.

Anon: Current locations of Omegas.

That’s all Tyler needs. He logs off and races off to get the others.

The a small team of Omegas spend the next week traveling to the nearest location that had been provided to them, staking out the building, infiltrating the building, and traveling back to Safe Have. The mission wasn’t easy, but Anon hadn’t disappointed them. In the end the team arrives home with five new Omegas who are beaten, bruised, scared, and malnourished. Upon arrival Hanna meet them at the entrace and immediatly sends the injued and the new arrivals to the infirmary with Jayden to receive medical attention. 

“So, the intell was accurate.” Hanna says to Zero as they walk back to their shared room.

He nodds. “You think its a spy on the inside of the Slave Market?”

Hanna chews on the inside of her lip. “She had considered the possibility, and though part of her hopes thats whats was going on, the other part of her is skeptical. They needed to contact Anon.

Later in the afternoon the Big Six gather inside of the office. Madison, Jayden, Zero, Tyler, and Hanna, all stand around the island in the center of the room and hold their breath as Madison calls Anon. 

He picks up on the fourth ring.

“Hello?” He says.

“We got the Omegas.” Madison says sharply and straight to the point. “Now tell us who you are.”

“I want to speak to Hanna.”

“This is Hanna.”

“No. Your not. You’re Madison. Now, Madison, hand me over to Hanna. I know she’s there.”

Madison pulls the phone away from her face and she covers the microphone with the palm of her hand. “He called my bluff.” She says irritated. She turns to Hanna. “He wants to talk to you. Do you want to take it or should I tell him to fuck off?”

Hanna has her palms pressed into the edge of the desk and she’s leaning against the peice of furniture with all her weight. She looks at the phone that Madison holds out to her, before taking it, putting it on speaker phone, and placing it down on the counter before her.

“This is Hanna. Who is this?” Hanna says.

There's the sound shuffling on the other end, followed by a smooth male voice. “Hello Hanna.”

Zero is marching up to Hanna and she knows that he’s going for the phone. She holds a hand up to Zero and stops him in his tracks.

Of course it was him. It all made sense now. 

“I missed you Hanna. How have you been?”

Hanna’s stomach clenches and she grips the edge of the desk tightly. “Well to be honest I was doing great right up untill five fucking seconds ago.” 

Conner grumbles on the other end. “Such a filthy mouth you have there Hanna. I see your set back in your old ways. Pity. I had you behaving so well for me before you left.”

“You mean before I escaped?” Hanna snarls.

“No, actually, I do mean left. What else do you call it when your lover walks out in the middle of having sex, and leaves you inebriates and tied to a bed?” He chuckles to himself and he sounds unhinged. “I knew you were a vixen Hanna but damn - - that was criminal.”

Hannas ears flush and suddenly she wishes that fifteen year old Jayden had been excluded from this meeting. “We were never lovers.”

“No?”

"No.” Her voice is as unyielding and cold as steel.

Another pause. “Well, I guess I underestimated you Hanna. Your acting abilities had me fooled. It felt real to me.”

Anger and a practiced speech boils in her chest. She knew one day she would be able to say these words to Conner, but she hadn’t known when. “Your delusion was your downfall.” She says. “You thought you had me wrapped around your finger, trained and obedient like some sort of dog, but you were wrong.” She smirks and it can be heard in her voice. “The whole time I was the one that had you wrapped around my finger. I tugged on your heartstrings and did what you wanted because I knew, one day, you would let your guard down, and I would be free. I never belonged to you. Not for a single god damn moment.”

There’s a long strech of silence on his end and everyone but Hanna and Zero start to wonder if he’s still there.

“Very well then.” He sighs. “I’ll be seeing you soon Hanna, and until then, take care of yourself.” Another pause. Then, “I want you in prime condition when I come to collect what is rightfully mine.”

>> The Story of Hanna Light Master List <<

[little-merry-go-round]

There’s a lot of shit that was bothering me lately and i need to get it out of my system. I understand a lot of you don’t wanna read that kind of stuff so i’m tagging discourse and putting the rest of the post under the cut. Hope it’ll work

The first thing i wanna talk about is the way Jack interact with us here on tumblr but also on reddit. Do you remember favouritism drama that happened last february? People were pointing out Jack rebloging from same people all the time, he said he doesn’t do it on purpose, things were talked out and were ok for a while. However we came back to the same place again. I wouldn’t call it necessary favouritism but idk, ignorance maybe? I payed attention who Jack rebloging from, who’s posts he see in reddit vids. Before ya’ll jump on me, i don’t blame artists or people who he interact with at all. I’m glad they post and i hope they continue. The point i’m trying to make is Jack going through most popular most of the times. I don’t know why is this. I tried to ask him, i tried to ignore it, i tried to convince myself that i’m just jealous bitch and he does care about us all still equally. It’s really hard to think that when you see over and over popular creators, who already got good amount of notes, being featured in vids/ rebloged/ interacted with. Again, i don’t blame creators at all. I just feel frustrated that smaller creators doesn’t have chance to be seen, not only by Jack but by anybody really since a lot of people avoid tag to not see tea blogs posts. And then Jack saying in videos that he’s sad creators leaving… Are you surprised? Really? It was going fo so long and nothings changing in that regard.

I remember Jack said something along the line once “it’s better to interact with few than to not interact at all”. That’s true when “few” changes constantly but if it’s same few over and over you shouldn’t be surprised when people feel like worse of a fans and leaving.

“Draw for yourself, not for Jack”. Yeah, i do. I do draw and colour and i’m being creative whenever i have time. I just don’t post that often here anymore. Don’t be hypocrite. You all posting in the tag because you want to be seen. If you wouldn’t be seen you wouldn’t post in tag or even anywhere online. It’s very easy to say “notes doesn’t matter” when you get feedback whatever you post. I don’t want him to interact with everybody. A little bit of variety wouldn’t hurt tho.

I’ll quote something he posted on tumblr early this year: “I know I reblog and interact with certain people here more than others, I don’t think it ever really occurred to me properly because I usually just fly through the tag each day and interact with stuff as I see it and what it pertains to. It’s never been on my mind to do it for some more than others or “play favourites”. Some people are just FAR more active here than others and in the tag way more often, so just by sheer number alone it would make sense that I would see their stuff more as it’s usually more current. I’m sorry if people felt left out or underappreciated as a result of that. It’s a byproduct of things rather than the intent.” First of all I don’t believe he doesn’t recognize people artstyes at this point. Secondly it’s not hard to see the same popular people if you only going through most popular posts.

Another thing that’s bothering me are charity streams. Not that Jack raising money, that’s good. I’m not that much of a bitch. I mean the way streams are handle. Jack seems often unprepared. I don’t talk about games here, but about charity itself. Shouldn’t he know more about them instead of reading what they’re doing from their website? It was especially bothering me with team trees charity because this topic is talked about a lot and it’s really not that hard to find informations about it. “Let’s plant 20mln trees and save the planet!” No hun, it can and will help but it won’t save the planet as you claim.

“You’re going on the board” pissing me off so damn much everytime. I never watch streams if i don’t feel well mentaly because of that board thing mostly. I understand that you wanna reward people somehow, i get where it came from but again, it’s so unfair. Let’s give example. There’s person A who have a good job and earn quite a lot. It’s no problem for them to save thousand or two for charity. They will go on the board for that. There’s person B, who has shitty job, or is unemployed a lot of time. They have health problems and strugling everyday. They still wanna help out and give a dollar for a charity every month. Are you familiar with a biblical story about widow from Luke chapter 21? That’s what i mean with this example. Did you notice the way Jack read donations? How pumped he is when somebody give thousand dollars or at least few hundred and how he rush through one dollar donations? Because i did. Please don’t come to me saying he’s not guilt tripping people because he does. I don’t believe he’s doing it on purpose but don’t tell me you never felt that way. I just don’t believe you.

Forced PMA. This was talked about many times. Jack said it’s not about being happy all the time. Most of the community agree, yet i constantly see PMA = no negativity mentality and Jack incourage that by liking that kind of posts. Jack used to play “serious games” and tried to take opportunities to talk about mental health and about reaching out to friends, parents and getting professional help if it’s needed. I don’t blame him for not playing that kind of games anymore but he switched from that to making meme videos, and God forbid, yelling “a meme a day keeps the depression away”. And people take it seriously. They really do. I saw with my two own eyes on jse discord that somebody said they have depression and they don’t feel too well and another person replied with - go watch some MEMES because a meme a day keeps the depression away hehe. What is this??? Is it really the message you wanna send? Just google those memes. They’re disgusting.

Tea blogs. Again, are you surpriced they’re there? Are you surpriced that when one get deleted another two or three appear? I’m not at all. Because everytime someone try to voice their opinion respectfully (especially more popular people in community) they get anons saying things from “that’s not very pma of you”, “You’re just jealous”, “Jack would be disappointed”, “Jack doesn’t want you here”, “If you don’t like him then leave” to “go kill yourself”. Nobody want to get such lovely message. To avoid that they’re going to tea blogs. Sure, there is a lot of hate there too. Sure, there are people who just wanna talk shit and spread lies. But there are also issues like the ones i wrote above. They won’t disappear if we won’t talk about them. I do care about Jack. I really do. I want him to do well and i want have good time watching his vids. i wanna interact with people who i met in this community. That’s why i’m writing it all, because i believe we’re better than that. I wanna see us improve not go down.

I really like what Jack tweeted and deleted  "We all need love & support in life but also need someone to call us on our shit now and then. Don’t surround yourself with just “yes” people".

[bytemycupcakes]

Okay like I mentioned in that last reblog-

I’m starting to prefer Twitter...

And not just because of Tumblrs dumb fucking flagging system.

The community has to do with it too- I feel bad to say it, honestly but

Twitter interacts with me. It doesn’t feel like I’m throwing art into the void to gain a few likes then be forgotten.

I get retweets, likes, replies. More than I get here and I’m not even at 100 followers there yet.

I know it’s not a numbers game. That I should be posting for myself and myself alone. But god DAMN nobody wants to throw their content into the void. It doesn’t feel good, I like interacting with the community looking at my content. It helps motivate me to make more. When it feels like I’m just throwing art into a hole, I don’t want to post it here anymore. I don’t even want to make it.

Twitter has been getting a ton of exclusive doodles because it feels like they care about them.

Yes, maybe this can be chalked up to getting involved with some rp’ers, but they are a minority of who’s interacting. They’re alot of the replies, yes, but retweets and likes? Those are from just ordinary twitters.

Look

I love tumblr, I always have and I’ll never drop the website... But it hurts so much knowing that the communities built here just... dont interact with eachother. I can get being quiet- I’ll admit I don’t interact with blogs I love too often- But god damnit I’m not silent. I’ll send the occasional ask, reblog everything I can and add sweet tags when I can think of some. Despite it seeming like nobody really cares about my content, I still check every reblog. In hopes that there will be some sort of comment- There very rarely is.

I know I sound like some whiny kid, begging for attention because “boo hoo nobody sends me asks :(”. I don’t expect a flooded inbox, I never do. But I started headcanon posts for a reason, I used to do sprite edits for a reason. It gets people to interact and show they like what I make. I have 520 followers, looking at my posts and interactions, I’d guess I have around 100 on the high end.

I’m tired of this, I have a community here. I want nothing more than to know all of you, to be able to recognize some urls in my notes as friends.

I couldnt care less about tumblrs flagging system. that isnt killing the site for me. The lack of interaction is and I cant stand it

I hate that I’m posting this. It sounds like I’m begging for attention. Yeah, I’m begging. But I’m begging for a reason to STAY here and continue posting my art for you all.

[shego1142]

Gods honestly I think some of this is a remnant of “cringe culture” and “purity policing” or “fanpol” taken to a fucking extreme

To the point that geeking out and nerding and being a fanboy or a fangirl or a fanenby (is there a better word for that?) has gone away almost entirely and that’s gods damn heartbreaking.

Where being passionate and excited but not necessarily having a totally well thought out way to put your feelings is now being seen as “messy and embarrassing”

Like if you see something you like, yes you don’t have to add anything to it

But also, you can absolutely just add nonsense feral “omfggggg!!!!!!11” screeching to it because you like it so much.

And no that doesn’t have to be in the tags if you have a tagging system you’re trying to maintain either (tho may the gods help you if you do)

But like seriously, I think everyone’s terrified of being seen as annoying or embarrassing or weird, terrified of getting put in a call out post or getting doxxed or what the fuck ever.

People have started treating their online presence as though it’s, idk a career or something. Something they have to be demure and restrained about.

Idk what the fix is tbh… I honestly suffer from the same thing.

Half the reason I stopped reblogging so much and interacting with as many people as I used to on here was fandom purity bullshit.

I have some opinions people dislike and I got actually scared that I’d be on some call out post (tho tbh I’m probably on a call out post somewhere)

I just couldn’t find a good middle ground between wanting to be totally myself, unrestrained and geeky and a total dorky nerd

And being bullied by people who didn’t get it, who didn’t know me or care that I was a fucking person, who were our for blood and had dozens of people to back them up (or could make multiple bot accounts to send spam anon hate)

And back in the really good fandom days, one thing that made it worth it in my opinion was the camaraderie.

And that’s fucking gone now.

Back in like early 2010’s or whatever idk time isn’t real, if you shipped the same ship, you guys were bonded for fucking life.

Hell sometimes just being in the same fandom earned you that support.

There was so much less fandom infighting.

And mock SuperWhoLock all you want, but it wasn’t just a “lol peeps who are in one of those fandoms are usually in the other two fandoms hahaha thing”

No, when someone in the Sherlock fandom was getting hate or whatever, you could bet that the peeps in the Supernatural fandom and the peeps in the Doctor Who fandom would be there for them.

We would send each other kind messages, we would go message (or fanmail) other peeps in the same fandom or with similar ships who we had never spoken to and go “so and so is being bullied”

And we’d come together to drown out the hate.

Sometimes a person in a fandom/person with a specific ship getting hate would be like a catalyst for artists to create more for that fandom or ship.

We had people who kept the tags clean of negativity, people who would ask others to take their hate out of a ship tag.

People who kept ship wars in check, they were just funny little fun arguments, not the downright blood baths they’ve become (tjlc I am glaring at you so hard right now)

Fandom has died, is in its death throes, for a lot of reasons but a huge chunk of it is this mentality of “oh I don’t hate the ship they have or the fandom they’re in but I’m not going to support them because then I’ll get yelled at”

And fandom is like 85% of what made tumblr tick.

Hell, even the aesthetic blogs were a fandom in their own right.

And whether or not anyone knows what an aesthetic blog even is or not is up in the air too but kinda besides the point.

Like yes tumblr absolutely is the be weird be embarrassing annoy your friends website.

But as long as it’s not safe for us to do so, people won’t.

As long as it’s focused around saying one liners and getting the most notes and whatever, people aren’t going to reblog anything that could be seen as “cringy”

Making fandom spaces safe involves letting go of a lot of purity culture crap and looking into what is basically library science, or really just the motto:

A truly great library contains something in it to offend everyone. - Jo Godwin, Librarian

Which is a much longer conversation than needs to be added to this post specifically but… yea

We can’t just ask people to geek out and let their freak flags fly when we don’t have the same infrastructure or commitment to also protecting them. 

If you want tumblr to stay alive or come back to life, reblogging things you like is the way to do it.

If you want people to reblog things they like… you have to make it safe and acceptable to do so. Or at least you have to have their backs when people get up in arms about it.

seeing a lot of "why would i reblog anything i don't have something to add" like

sir this is the user-circulated content site

[takaraphoenix]

My Ultimate Website Wish

Okay, there is a particular thing that I wish would exist.

Basically, a TV show database in the style of AO3. Particularly the new upgraded search-function, as well as the tagging-system.

The main thing we scold antis about is the fact that they can just blacklist tags and avoid content to their dislike. And what that really did was remind me just how wonderful that’d be for actual canon content. Because none of those things apply to canon. You don’t get warning tags to tell you this will feature something you’d love to avoid.

Just imagine there to be a database of TV shows where you search for specific tags, or a TV show’s title, and get search results in the style of AO3.

Let’s take, for example, Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

You got the name at the head of it, the character-tags would be replaced by actor-tags, then come the additional tags, followed by a summary, whether or not it’s part of an expanded universe and then with some additional information.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Joss Whedon

Sarah Michelle Gellar, Nicholas Brendon, Alyson Hannigan, Anthony Stewart Head, Charisma Carpenter, David Boreanaz, Seth Green, James Marsters, Emma Caulfield, Marc Blucas, Michelle Trachtenberg, Amber Benson

The Chosen One (Trope), Supernatural/Fantasy (Genre), Comedy (Genre), Vampires, Werewolves, Demons, Canon Lesbian Character(s), LGBT Representation

Buffy Summers is the Slayer, one woman chosen with the burden to fight demons and defend humanity. She fights her battle with the help of her friends.

Part 1 of the Buffy-verse

Land: America, Seasons: 7, Status: Completed

I mean, a more detailed summary and more tags, but just as an example.

I don’t even need to be able to click onto the show’s title and for that to do anything. I really just mean the bullet-point information on the outside.

You can click on the Joss Whedon and be linked to all shows made by him.

You can click the actors to have a list of TV shows featuring them in major roles.

In case of a larger universe, you’d have the same series-function as on AO3. You can now click “Buffy-verse” and will get to a page that lists both Buffy the Vampire Slayer as well as its spin-off Angel.

And, of course, the most important ones, the additional tags.

You’re specifically looking for Supernatural/Fantasy shows? You can filter by that! You want to be even more specific? You can include the tag “Werewolves” and, say, you don’t actually like vampires? Exclude “Vampires”. Buffy the Vampire Slayer will no longer show up, but instead you get an assorted list of Supernatural/Fantasy shows specifically focusing on werewolves, without vampires.

Because that in particular is what I have recently been looking for and all you get when it comes to lists are weird, not overly helpful IMDB lists.

Or the LGBT Representation, with additional individual tags for what representation - so you can seek not just general rep, but also specifically representing you. Bisexual characters got their own wikipedia page to catalogue shows featuring them, but when you’re specifically looking for lesbians? Tough luck. I know, I tried finding something just the other day. Or, say, a combination of more representation than just riking that “this is our obligatory one token gay”.

But I don’t even want it just for the sake of things that I’m specifically looking for.

I would also want it to avoid certain things I dislike. Let’s take an example with more problematic themes in it.

Game of Thrones by David Benioff and D.B. Weiss

Kit Harington, Emilia Clarke, Lena Headey, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, etc (listen, I don’t have that much time for an example, but you get the gist)

Book Adaptation, Supernatural/Fantasy (Genre), Medieval Times (Setting), Magic, Dragons, Brother/Sister Incest, Aunt/Nephew Incest, Rape/Non-Con, Torture, Zombies

In the land of Westeros, whoever sits on the Iron Throne rules. The houses Stark, Targaryen and Lannister fight for the right to rule.

Land: America, Seasons: 7, Status: Incomplete

Because honestly, had I known from the get-go there were going to be fucking zombies in this, I would have never actually started watching the show. By the time the damn zombies came around, I was too invested too abandon it. Now I just... fast forward through every zombie-scene.

But there are certain themes that people are just not comfortable with. And you won’t find explicit warnings about those things on DVD covers or on wikipedia.

Not everyone is comfortable with incest. They should have a safe way of being able to avoid shows prominently featuring incest without having to watch it.

Same goes for literally everything.

Because every person has things they are uncomfortable with, or things that might even be triggering, and no one should have to sit through it in canon, or even be ambushed by it because it’s an element not immediately introduced in episode one.

So you can safely search for fantasy shows and exclude tags that make you uncomfortable and then watch the shows that feature tags and tropes that you, personally enjoy.

But not just tropes and genres. I’d love things like a “Book Adaptation” tag because I really love TV show book adaptations. Or “Tie-In to a Movie”. Say, looking for shows focusin on “Greek Mythology” and you get Atlantis, Troy, Disney’s Hercules, Hercules: The Legendary Journey, or the “Fairy Tale Adaptations” bringing you a list including things like 10th Kingdom, Once Upon a Time, Grimm. You could have a list of “Comic Adaptations” with one click instead of having to filter through things and have different lists for DC and Marvel.

There are many very specific things that cover many, many TV shows and that it’d be awesome to filter by.

And while I have the knowledge to fill many, many such TV shows entries for such a website, I do not have the skills to actually make such a website.

But gods, would I want it.

[anxious-amethyst]

I don’t see people go into the nitty gritty bits of mental health..

And I mean those details that I find not many people speak of. As if its taboo to mention we are human. I have a filter made of cling wrap with giant holes in it. And the cling wrap bunches up in places too, distorting the words to others’ perspectives; making me come off as a bitch. (I truly am a very kind person, I am just bad with social skills at times.) My point being, that I have no problem speaking my truth to all of you invisible faces that may or may not see this. I’m sure down the road, if I ever finish and publish my novel and become J.K. Rowling famous (a dream of mine) that this can easily be dug up. I will smile with a small laugh in that interview with Stephen Colbert and be frank. 

The tags come at the end of a post and not everyone filters everything that makes them (is it squick? what was that word that is a better replacement for trigger..) So as a heads up, if you absolutely can’t stand the thought of body, hmm, uh functions I suppose. (Not sure what category my topic falls in to) then I have given you an escape rope. (Now I want to play Pokemon again.)

As I am being completely honest and transparent, I literally can’t seem to figure out when A. my nervous breakdown began (still in it) and B. when I last showered, heck even brushed my teeth. Now I know several things, thankfully. One being that I have not left the house this whole week from April 14th to today, April 20th. Easter is tomorrow and I am forcing myself (to the best of my abilities) to attend Church and the whole family get together. My plan being, Church is for God and you owe it to him and yourself to go and be lifted up. Family gathering is going to be hell, no point sugar coating it. So bring a book and think of the Strawberry/Pretzel Casserole that Aunt Faith hopefully made and the sweet pickles that Pop-Pop usually brings. Remember to be kind to yourself and fake a smile, these are the people you do NOT want to be honest with. Lie through your ass like your life depends on it because in a way, it does. You are not obligated to say anything more than hello, give hugs however because you need and love them. Do speak for a bit so as not to be rude. But the book is your safety net. Deploy it ASAP. And somehow get your loving cousin to attach to your sister instead.

A nitty gritty part that is not gross, is the withdrawal... from everyone. Like I’m straight up not talking to anyone unless I have to, and society is out of my mind. I do however, happily speak with my irl friend when she messages. I know she is busy though and has her own problems so I try to censor my frankness quite a bit because she doesn’t deserve that kind of worry. Unfortunately, my parents and sister are not able to be kept out of the whole truth for their protection. They see it. I don’t even have to say a thing. I have been threatened with a, how to put this nicely, place full of even crazier people imo and where they drug you to the high heavens. Yeah. I’m not flying over the cuckoo’s nest. (Deep terror of those places, this will not be helpful to me.) But that gives you an idea of how bad this breakdown is. The other thing I know, is that it started on Sunday. I’m inclined to believe that it was the April 14th Sunday, but am unsure as it still feels like Monday. So maybe this breakdown is heading into a week, maybe not. One thing is, those websites were right. The longer a breakdown continues, the worse it gets. Each day is less and less food, water, and movement. And that’s just basic necessities. I’m trying to hold out for my therapist appointment coming up next week. She has so many people though, that each appointment is a week or two, sometimes more, away. Not exactly the best mental treatment for my situation, I admit. But I am stubborn, perhaps that stubborness can save me while I also shoot myself in the foot. Its possible.

Now for the gross nitty gritty. Apologies for the many tangents, turns out when you don’t talk to anyone for a week, you end up with a lot to say. Good news! I finally showered AND shaved my armpits which hadn’t been shaved in months. So they can breathe I guess, and my skin can breathe too LOL. But with depression can come fatigue. I have that. So a normal depressed person can be way too exhausted to even think of a shower. For others, it may be some other form of hygiene. All forms of hygiene have died with my depression. On top of that, the bitch depression bought a horrible, mangy dog with her called Executive Dysfunction. This mutt dogs your every step. (Thank God, depression didn’t steal my love for jokes, puns, and metaphors.) Some people have depression that goes an extra step and brings about the literal destruction of that executive function system in their brain. (I just mean that the signals are all fucked up.) And then, some people with both of these also have Anxiety! So they end up with all of these contradicting thoughts and emotions that in the end, makes tasks, like showering, unaccomplishable. Now there are many other conditions that bring about these issues, I am aware, but I am speaking of my own and know for a fact that I can’t be the only one with these kinds of experiences. So this gross factor goes out to all of those who have experienced the same level of cringe or worse, and aren’t up to the potential ridicule that comes with expressing your truth. (To be clear, I’m not dedicating a gross thing to you out of spite, I just mean I’m making a problem you have encountered, heard as well.) 

By the end of the shower, I could barely make it. I was slowing down realllll fast. The NeebsGaming video I was listening to on YouTube is what got me through the shower. Gosh those guys are great. I shaved my armpits before washing my body because I figured stray hair or shaving cream might be in the crevice of one’s arm that I legit can’t see, even with glasses. Between the amount of hair that came out of my head during scrubbing shampoo like a madman, any stray dog hairs that my head picked up from my pillow which my dog sleeps on when he waits for me to snuggle, and the long armpit hair; the drain was kinda blocked. Our shower has that metal thing with holes in it, so its not as terrifying of a drain. But excessive hair or large lumps of solid soap (from a soap bar) can block off a hole. Or in my case, all. So water is not draining, which naturally means the tub is filling. My body is slowing down and I’m trying to push through it while not thinking of the disgusting water approaching my feet. If you’ve ever washed your hands after not washing them for ages and touching many things out in the world, the water, and sometimes soap, turns varying shades of gray. Depends on the dirt particles and amount of dirtiness.Well I has transparent, because its water, charcoal shaded water approaching me. As if my own filth refused to leave my body and was threatening to drag me down the drain with it. 

When I finally finished and got out of the shower, I almost decided to just leave it. Thinking that maybe it will eventually drain on its own. I’m glad I didn’t. I began reaching my hand down to the drain and told myself not to think too much about how pubic hair makes me cringe and how pulling hair from a drain in general, makes me gag. Its a disturbing act if you ask me. Now I’m struggling to get armpit hair off of my hand and there’s somehow still loads more! So I dry my other hand on my towel and rip off a piece of toilet paper. The water is still not draining and I disturbed the many hairs when I went for the first grab. So now I am fishing in charcoal water for clumps of armpit hair. Then wiping it onto the paper. The water finally drains..... oh no.... I kid you not, a whole fucking trail of dirt was left on both sides of the tub on the water’s way to the drain. I take the showerhead and turn it on. Now I’m washing hair and dirt and some other substance I couldn’t see at the time (nearsighted plus the tub is white) down the drain. Except the hair covers the drain again. Typical. At least the dirt and the tub was rinsed. Since there’s no more water, I take a sheet of toilet paper again, and save myself from having to deal with pubic hair that sticks to any surface. (Seriously, what is the deal with pubic hair.) But there’s something else in it. And a lot of this something else. Like a whole body’s worth. The pubic hair is laced with large clumps of tannish, white (my skin color) skin cells. Now I have rubbed my arm before and made a trail of dead skin rolled up into fine lines appear. In the shower I wiped my face with my hand and pulled away that same rolled up skin. But I have never, experienced this amount of filth from myself before. I am still rubbing off some skin, so I probably should have washed my body a second time.

When you become so “broken” that you can’t seem to take care of yourself in a normal time and a healthy manner, you get to learn new things about the human body and experience some events that you probably could have gone your whole life without knowing. And that is something that I feel should be shared more often. That when the person who experienced this, opens up to those they trust, or to a complete stranger, that an appropriate reaction and response be given.

Julie: And then I saw large clumps of my own skin!

Tyrone: Oh damn girl, that is nasty. 

Julie: I know right! But the saddest part is, it probably won’t be the last time. I don’t think its enough to get me to shower regularly. 

Tyrone: Julie, while that isn’t “fine”, it is fine. It is understandable. You are experiencing and suffering from a very real problem. While I can’t confidently say it is or isn’t in your control because I’m no psychologist or whatever, I can confidently say that it won’t always be like this. I doubt that your whole life will be this mess that you are in. Now you may not be back to peak function a year from now, but you will definitely be more knowledgeable of yourself and probably better than you are today. It takes time and so long as God doesn’t need you in Heaven, I’d say you have time. *chuckles* I don’t know all that you are going through, I just met you. And I don’t know how to help you in a way that you may need. But I can certainly offer an ear or two, and a hug if you want one. You just keep on trucking on. You aren’t doing much, and you aren’t doing well. But you are here, and that’s an achievement in of itself.

Julie: Wow, thanks Tyrone. This really helped. One weight on my chest has been lifted, and I will take you up on that hug if you don’t mind.

That’s what it should be like. So if you are reading this and are like Tyrone, not suffering from mental health issues, but you know someone who is, or a stranger comes up to you in need of someone to listen to them; be like him. Offer encouragement and understanding, give advice if asked for it, don’t force physical contact without consent because some people are paranoid (like me) and choose your words and expressions carefully. If someone tells you something gross, react like you are grossed out (which you likely are) but don’t put them down for it. I imagine Tyrone to have that expression of “holy cow, you serious that this happened” when he said it was nasty. That easy going expression can clue Julie in on how he isn’t getting on her, or implying anything sexist by how she is a woman and shouldn’t be this filthy. He’s jovially charismatic, and open. That makes Julie comfortable and feel lighter. Now I included religion in Tyrone’s comment to tack on some humor without making jokes at Julie’s expense, and to show how to appropriately use your spirituality, if you have one. He’s not forcing it down her throat, she may not get the satire of the joke, but he tried. Not to mention, that Heaven, in Christianity, is a place where you are whole and happy. When you go to Heaven, you are with God and your loved ones. You live an eternal life of peace. So for him to imply that she is worth God’s eyes and Heaven, means that he respects her and is lifting her up. Bonus, he is reassuring her that while time is not infinite and we don’t know what the future holds for us, as of today, she still has plenty of time to get back on the track that she desires to be on. Instilling hope and faith. If you were on Julie’s side of life, wouldn’t you want a kind and funny Tyrone to listen and talk to?

[wherethesunsails]

Listen, I’m not saying that we should have all seen this coming, but...

This site has been in decline for years. We knew there were huge problems with it. There’s a reason we dubbed it a hellsite, and a very good reason at that. But we all stayed, some of us for years. Yeah, this site’s got issues and huge ones at that, but Tumblr is a site that’s unique in what it offers to its users. I’m not blaming anyone for jumping ship. I get it, and I support all of you and hope y’all find what you’re looking for. But I’m not here for the highest quality of site. I’m here for the people and the experience. I’m here because no other social media platform has a tagging system like this. I’m here because this is a site where a huge following to follower ratio isn’t abnormal. I’m here because of those mutuals that I have that I’ve interacted with because they’re the best. This site has an aura of anonymity, and that’s a lot of why we stay. Because it isn’t Instagram or Snapchat or Twitter. You can be open here, and you don’t need a pro-life or anti-gay filter. Sometimes that backfires, but for most of us, it’s why we’re here, because this has become our safe space.

I’m not jumping ship. I’ll be here until the Tumblr gods themselves kick me off of this damn website because this is a place where I can exist, no filter. I don’t blame some of you for leaving, but I’m not one of you.