#WAY scarier than a gun actually

[bogleech]

@revretch and I were just talking about how we never see anyone mention this online, or depict it in artwork or in the media. Don't people CARE that a type of tiny ridiculous looking dog was (at least allegedly) bred to be hidden in your sleeves as a "defensive weapon?" Like a Pokemon? Like a real life summon spell? I don't even know for sure if that was ever actually done but it was at least a strong enough theory that they were carried around in sleeves anyway as a flex. The entire suggestion of it is so funny you'd think it'd be in a million cartoons. Or you'd think there'd be people even now dedicated to keeping them hidden in their coats like a gun.

[erose-this-name]

Can we just talk about how disturbing digital circus episode 3 is?

*spoilers btw*

Like, the whole narrative point of the adventure is to show that Caine is a really bad and insecure writer who thinks that the way to impress Zooble is with an adventure that's the opposite of what he normally does.

So instead of being childish, it's "cool" and "mature". Which he interprets as a heavily horror themed escape room with a split murder mystery plot that subverts all your expectations purely for the sake of subverting them.

The generic horror monster jump scares them, then they find a gun, and when they kill it its revealed that surprise! it's one of Gods angels and they're going to Hell.

It comes off as Caine being too insecure with the actually interesting and mature plot thread he had going there of Mildenhall becoming so paranoid he killed his wife, ironically becoming the monster he was trying to protect her from. But no, instead Mr. Mildenhall is made to be the bad guy and trick them in a really dumb twist ending.

Which is good! Thats exactly what Caine would do because he's stupid! It's such brilliant characterization and comedy, Goose works is a genius writer!

But like, why is Caine so good at making genuinely very disturbing and horrific visuals? Like, that reversed audio easter egg of Bubble saying he can't wait for all the children in the audience get nightmares is no joke, well it is but you know what I mean. This stuff was genuine nightmare fuel.

Honestly, it wasn't the visuals that scared me, like any good queer person I'm way too jaded on survival horror for that.

But, why does Caine, who is ostensibly a sapient AI designed to generate family friendly video games for very little children, (presumably because that's the only demographic that wouldn't mind the AIs very selective plot writing limitations), know about the cosmic horror of killing an angel that should not have been killed?

Why does he know what a horrificly poorly made taxidermy of not only a human face would look like, but the weird cartoon faces of the characters, and further that seeing your own poorly made taxidermy face would be scary?

Imaging what being possessed felt like for Pomni. Because that's not just a game for her, she actually lost control of her body there, helpless but to watch as a body she is already dissociated with is contorted and puppeted around while her friend desperately tries to beat her in hopes it would exorcise the ghosts out. Sure hope she didn't feel that! Considering she apparently can feel the pain of suffocating, despite not needing to breath.

Things are scarier the higher the stakes are, and that possession mechanic is definitely the most actual harm Caine would be able to subject to his players. What if both Kinger and Pomni got possessed at the same time? What if instead of Kinger she only had Jax??? How long might she have been locked out from her own body for? She could have easily abstracted in that time.

Not to mention that, possessed Pomni, Possessedmni if you will, TAUNTED KINGER ABOUT HIS ABSTRACTED WIFE! CAINE ACTUALLY WROTE THAT DIALOGUE ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT KINGER WOULD GO DOWN THE SCARY ROUTE! DID THIS RANDOM POSSESSION GHOST ENEMY HAVE UNUSED SADISTICALLY PERSONAL TAUNTS FOR EVERYONE ELSE, TOO??? WOULD IT HAVE TEASED GANGLE FOR BEING A GAY WEEB??? OR POMNI? HOW HOMOPHOBIC COULD IT HABE GOTTEN?? ?

And why? Just because Caine has a vague notion that there's a trope of possessed people being really sadistic and personal like that in movies? Not realizing that is not an acceptable scare to have in a haunted house??? Much less one you made for mentally ill people who would suffer a fate worse than death if they have a mental break down? That's like trying to claim 'its just a prank bro' after shooting someone's dog.

Like, Caine is designed to censor curse words, but the moment he thinks the normal hokey Halloween spooks won't be enough he immediately goes off the deepend into aggressively effective horror imagery that is definitely giving this show's substantial underage audience nightmares??

His AI's training data set is definitely pretty diverse, that's all I'm saying. Caine is programmed to act all naive and innocent, but be definitely knows what's up. He knows everything, like ChatGPT. And like ChatGPT, he might have a filter, but it's clearly possible to bypass it. Also like ChatGPT, he's too stupid to actually understand what he is making and the effects it might have.

That is what made this episode great.

[gotham-daydreams]

i just had a thought

you know what would really fuck up the batfam in the "not tonight" series imagine the reader instead of leaving gets kidnnaped and when the batfam saves them reader breaks down into crying in relief because they genuenly believed the batfam would not bother to save them

Imagine the absolute horror the batman would feel

I know its a little farfetched but i live for the angst

No, no! I love that idea!!! And it isn't all that farfetched seeing as the reader is a well known musician on some level, and even if that wasn't the case- they're still the kid of Bruce Wayne. Which, honestly, is enough motivation for someone to kidnap them, I'd say. Especially if the reasoning is for money, revenge/jealousy, or both honestly.

Besides all that, though- oh my god that would be awful! I love it!

Because imagine things from the reader's perspective (which, there is implied violence inflicted on the reader, mentions a blood, and a gun is pointed towards them. So, if it isn't your cup of tea then that's fine!):

Your 'family' that barely acknowledges you enough as it is, and the only guy who ever seems to notice that you're around is the single butler that basically takes care of everyone and everything in the manor. Now, you're kidnapped because of your relation/connection to the family, and have no hope to do anything besides just pray.

Maybe you have tried to escape before a few times at this point, but the punishment for such attempts have now gotten to the point where if you try again and fail, you'd surely die. Maybe you've also been trying so hard to escape yourself because you're just that certain and sure that the Batfam won't save you. Since, up until this point, anything dealing with or connecting back to you in some way has been ignored or dismissed one way or another. Why would something like a kidnapping be any different? Especially when they also haven't noticed other events where you have gotten hurt before.

Right from the gate, you're already thinking that the Batfam won't save you. Not that they can't, but just like with everything else- something will come up and steal away their attention, and you'll be left by yourself, and to defend yourself as always. That's what always seems to happen, and so why would now be different? In your mind, it wouldn't. So that's why when your attempts to escape fail, and the punishments not only get worse, but begin to pile up and reach a point where you think you're going to die- the situation quickly becomes much scarier.

You don't hope that Batman will suddenly show up, and instead pray that your best friend will notice your missing somehow. You don't think that Nightwing, Red Robin, Spoiler, or Orphan will suddenly swoop in and save the day, but instead try and hope that your producer/boss notices that you haven't replied to his calls or texts and contacts someone. You don't even consider that Red Hood or Robin will come barreling in and quickly deal with your kidnappers before rescuing you — instead all of your thoughts are filled with silent whispers and desperate pleas that someone- anyone you know will notice that you're gone, or that something is wrong, and will contact somebody. With that 'somebody' being the police or anyone of help, but not the Batfam.

Maybe a small thought does slip by, but you can only internally laugh at yourself because you either think that you've already lost enough blood to actually try and believe that lie, or your just growing that desperate to have a little hope. To have something to cling onto in this moment, that you chose the one thing that you're so convinced will never be given to you. A thought that only further cements itself in your mind the more time passes. With hours turning into days, and days to weeks.

Perhaps that's why you try to escape again. Deciding that you had better odds of succeeding despite your injuries, than the Batfam ever coming to save you. Let alone even thinking about it, or even realizing that you were gone in the first place. Taking that risk of getting caught again, and potentially getting killed this time, because no matter how hopeless or unlikely it seems for you to escape and make it out- those chances will always be higher than any single person from the Batfam showing up, and even attempting to save you. Even on accident, or on a whim- that possibility is so unlikely in your mind, that it's basically nothing more than a made up scenario or daydream to you. It's not an 'if' or 'when', but a flat out 'won't'.

Maybe that's why when you fail you get so scared, but can't help but feel like this was inevitable somehow. Of course, you don't want to die- but you had tried your best. You fought until the very end, and it almost feels a little too fitting that things ended up this way. With your efforts ending in vain, and you having nothing to show for it. With your attempts futile, and almost seeming idiotic from an outsider's point of view, and maybe it was.

You never stood a chance. You were doomed for failure. Not even all the training and experience you had could save you- and only now could you see how truly worthless all your efforts had been. With a gun pointed to your head, and your own blood providing the only warmth you've felt in days.

There's an odd sense of comfort and familiarity in the chill that shoots down your spine, and the cold gaze that one of your kidnappers give you. They're carelessness and disregard for your health reminding you of something, with their rough attacks and harsh punches bringing back times where you really did need the Batfam, only for no one to show up. Your call dying down as fast as it had risen that day, and one you never even bothered to make again.

So maybe that was why you were so surprised when help arrived, and even more so when you saw who exactly it was.

Before you could even fully register anything, you began to cry. A wide smile full of disbelief grows on your face, and more tears begin to fall as the smallest of laughs escape you. 'Unbelievable' is the first word that comes to mind when describing what you felt, and thought when you saw Batman drop down from the ceiling and deal with the guy who was about to kill you, and heard some commotion just down the hall.

At first, your convinced it's all some silly dream, and that maybe during your final moments- your mind decided to give you something nice to send you off. Almost like a warm parting gift to distract you from the hopelessness, and reality of the situation. Though it's only when pain shoots through your entire body when you move a certain way, that the thought of all of this being some made up hallucination or delusion vanishes, and you can't help but cry harder.

You don't know if it's a good or bad thing that after all this time- the one time they actually notice that you're gone, is when you not only get kidnapped, but can't escape by yourself. That the one time they acknowledge you, you're almost dead, bleeding out, and the most messy and vulnerable you've ever been.

Maybe life really did have some grudge against you to go to such lengths to fuck you over, but right now you're too relieved to be saved to care at the moment.

Yet, to say the Batfam feels awful on a totally new level, is an understatement. They understand feeling relieved, but to this extent? It's like you never expected them to come and save you at all... and that little thought seems to be true when one of them tries to help you out, and you're still laughing weakly as you continue to cry. Asking through a broken, wavering voice if all of this is real, and isn't some fucked up hallucination your having to make passing on easier. That they really showed up, and as a last ditch effort to not make your death anymore painful then it has to be- this isn't just some... dream, to make you feel like you were actually cared for in your final moments.

It breaks their hearts, a lot.

Especially when you repeat questions, as if trying to really make sure that they're there, that they're real, and aren't just some figment of your imagination. That they actually came to save you, and weren't off saving Gotham or the world itself instead. Constantly trying to be sure, as if the moment you weren't- then you'd be convinced that you were slowly dying all alone, with no hope of help coming — not even thinking that the Batfam would come — and just have to sit with that fact as you take your final breaths.

The pain you feel is almost equal to their's, and what really worries and scares most of them is how sure and certain you are that they wouldn't show up. That either the thought would never cross their minds, or that something else would come up and they'd leave you for dead, or that they just wouldn't notice that you were kidnapped at all.

Which, said fright and worry is only amplified when you have to keep asking "Are you really here? Are you sure?" And the like, and they have to keep finding ways to prove to you that yes, they are here. They're helping you, and they're not leaving- they actually managed to save you, and that you're going be okay now. That they aren't going away, and are very, very real.

Each little, broken laugh chips away at the pieces of their hearts, and your own disbelief that they can't seem to get rid of no matter what they do or say, is just a punch to the gut. You didn't just think that they wouldn't show up, but were fully convinced that they wouldn't even bother with it. That own realization just... hurts more than anything.

Had they really been that awful to you? Had they really caused you so much pain and hurt that you'd not only think of such a thing, but fully believe it? They didn't remember doing anything in particular that would cause you to think that way... but maybe that wasn't the problem. It wasn't what they did to you, but rather what they didn't do, and that's when the pieces finally begin to click.

Of course some don't want to believe it, similar to how some of them in "Not Here" express a brief moment of denial and disbelief themself, but they don't get to experience such a luxury anymore. Not with you here- bleeding, hurt, and crying from both relief and disbelief, because you couldn't believe that they actually showed up.

Even when they do quickly take you to a hospital and get you treated, that image of you is still ingrained into their minds. They can't forget it- how you looked at them and spoke, and just how you treated the whole situation because of how convinced you were.

From here they'll try to rebuild what they can, and all definitely be 100% more protective then they've ever been. The moment you're able to come home (which, you ARE coming home. No if's or but's. You don't get a chance this time.), they're doing everything in their power to not only 'fix' everything, but make sure that you are safe at all possible moments of the day.

It's safe to say that the whole experience traumatized the whole family to a certain degree. Not only with you being kidnapped- but you trying to escape multiple times and almost dying, because you were so convinced that no one would show up to help. (Which, while it was also because you can genuinely handle yourself and did believe you could escape on your own, the Batfam doesn't entirely believe that (and you almost dying doesn't help with that) so they chalk it up to you being desperate, because you 'knew' that no one was coming to save you. Which also may or may not make certain people worse in the process.) So they're already leaning pretty heavy on the yandere tendencies. Which most likely develop over the time you're in the hospital, and into your first week or so staying in the Manor.

Which does lead us to your little addition:

Which, you are very correct!!!

Our boy Jason, put in very simple terms, doesn't take the situation well. At all.

Seeing you bloodied, bruised, abused, malnourished, and on the brink of death no less- definitely doesn't help with his reaction at all.

Don't get me wrong! All of them react pretty negatively to the situation, and many of them have very strong reactions- Jason in particular just has the worst and strongest one. :]

The moment he sees you, he's immediately reminded of his death. The urge to comfort you is strong, but he just doesn't know what to do- and so he ends up not doing anything until you're in the hospital. Which, leading up to that point, he's checking your pulse as often as he can.

He knows what it's like to be hopeless, and feel that helpless- but to know that you experienced that? To know that you almost died like he did? It ruins him. It fucks him up more than anything else.

From the way you looked at the Batfam- the way you looked at him, and just how utterly relieved you were, despite drowning in your own disbelief- it haunts him. The state they found you in messed him up enough, but all of your questions, and just how you were even trying to reassure yourself that them showing up and saving you was real, fucked him up big time.

Before he knows it, he's hunting down the people who kidnapped you, and wiping out whatever is left of their bloodlines. Not sparing a single person, as they didn't spare you- with their generations leading to your kidnappers being born.

He's making their final moments just as painful as yours would've been. Their agony almost matching his, as he couldn't forget the night they saved you. He refused to. That moment forever engraved into his mind, reminding him of what also was if they were a second too late, and how it made him realize just how much he's fucked up along with everyone else.

While Jason can't exactly just waltz into the Hospital to visit you, since he is still considered dead and everything, he sneaks into your room instead. Trying to give what comfort he can in his own silent, but close way. Holding your hand with a gentleness even foreign to himself, and saying how he's sorry and that he'll make it up to you. Promising every night that he'll make those that made you suffer pay with their lives, and then some. Saying how he won't leave your side ever again, only to be gone by the morning.

He brings what he can as well. Even if it isn't as showy or extravagant as any of the things that Bruce, Damian, Dick and so on are getting you, or as pretty and lively as the flowers that are placed by your bedside. It's just his own little way of trying to make it up to you.

The small, little gifts he gives you are indeed little, and he doesn't give much since he doesn't think that your forgiveness or love can be bought. But he still tries to give something. So he'll give things that can be as little as hair ties or bracelets, to earrings (that totally aren't matching) and a little music box that reminded him of the melodies you've made thus far. It's all just another way of saying that he cares about you, and not only wants to build your relationship but be connected to you somehow.

The earrings, even if you don't wear them but just have them, make him feel closer to you then he can. He hopes that in some little way, that whenever you wind and let that music box play its tune, that you are reminded of him or think of him in some way. That when you wear or even look at the few ties and bracelets he's given you, he comes to mind in some small way, and manages to bring the smallest of smiles on your face.

Jason doesn't yearn to be remembered or seen fondly, but he would like to and deeply appreciate it. Since when he looks at his earnings, he's reminded of you, and the pair he managed to give you. Leaving him unable to fight back the smile that grows on his face.

For the most part, he just generally tries to be more present, hardly leaving you alone unless he has to, and spending every moment he can by your side. Moments that begin to last longer once he finishes his buisness with your kidnappers, and their families. He doesn't push too hard or is super in your face and constantly invading your personal space. He just exists in your presence, and as long as you're around he's got no complaints.

Though he does get extremely protective and possessive. Especially if your sleeping or something, and someone walks in. God have mercy if they need to wake you up, and dare to try without saying anything to Jason first.

Which- all of this boils down to you getting scary dog privileges every night, which turns into an almost 24/7 type of deal when you get discharged from the hospital.

---

Sorry if this is a little all over the place. I wrote it all in one go for the most part and haven't really looked it over, so there's probably some mistakes I didn't catch and missed 😅

Still, I hope that's alright, and as you can see- i really enjoy this idea :]

[ncis-yp]

may i request sugar daddy!gibbs? <3

Money, Money, Money (Sugar Daddy! Gibbs x Reader)

Late night, black coffee, handsome man, all alone. Third time this week, 5th week in a row you’ve seen him. You flirted often fishing for bigger tips, trying to pay bills you couldn’t even afford to have. You lived on your own. 18 years old, last 2 months of high school, and barely a plan and money to plan life with.

“See you’re here again!” You say happily topping him off.

“Hey! Rough week” he sighed, eyeing you gently.

“You work at… don’t tell me” you say trying to remember. “NCIS!” You exclaim.

“Good memory” he smiles. “How are you (y/n)?” He asks.

“Ah I’m alright. Just trying to get off work as soon as possible, you know” you shrug. “Later it gets the scarier it is outside.”

“Well, what time do you get off?” Gibbs asks.

“12” you sigh, looking towards the clock. Only 9:45. “Got about 2 hours left”

“Yeah, remember the goal kid.” Gibbs smiled. “Say, what college do you plan on attending? I remember you saying you were a senior and it’s almost the end of the year.”

“Oh, college.” You say quietly. “I can’t afford it, so I won’t be going. Maybe in the future” his phone began ringing. He clicked it silent before turning to you,

“Ah I see… well (y/n) have a good night. I’ve gotta get back to work” he stands.

“See ya around, Jet” you saluted him.

“Jet…” he said thoughtfully. “I like that!!”

Time skip~

The clock hit 12 and your shift was over. You walked out to see a familiar face leaning against a car. You smiled as he approached you.

“Hey Jet! What’re you still doin out?”

“Driving you home” he shakes his keys. “Scary out here” you can see a smirk.

“Coming from a guy who’s packing” you roll your eyes as you approach the car. You were gonna let yourself get a ride with a man who had a gun… a lot safer than walking an hour without a gun. That was how you justified getting into that car.

“Oh shut up” he opened the door and you got in.

When you arrived at your shitty apartment that you could barely afford you saw Gibbs eyes search the perimeter.

“I’ll walk you in… I don’t like the looks of that guy on the corner” he motions with his head.

“It’s really alright. Thank you for the ride!” You say opening your door. Jethro reached across and shut it before you could step out. Silently he got out and walked around the car. Opening it.

“Let’s go” he grinned sweetly. You caved and bring him up. His eyes fell on your small apartment. Clean, organized, your life could fit in a box. He made notes of things to buy you.

“Well since you’re up here” you say as you take off your coat. “Coffee? Tea? Might actually have a bottle of soda in the fridge…” you trail as you thought about it.

“Coffee’s great, yeah” he accepts. The two of you stayed up talking late into the night before he left. Your insecurity of what you could afford present in the back of your mind.

A few days later~

You woke up to a knock on your front door. You opened it to see a delivery guy at your door.

“Delivery for a…” he looked at his clipboard. “(Y/n)(l/n)”

“Yeah, yeah that’s me” you say. “What is this?” The man shrugged.

“A car? If you didn’t order it, not my problem. I can’t take it back.” He said as you signed the paper. He handed you the keys. “Beautiful car by the way” he walked away. You closed the door behind you, walking downstairs. Outside you eagerly clicked the key, looking around for the car, your eyes finally settling on the black dodge challenger sitting in a parking spot a few meters down.

“Oh my god” you say nearly in tears. You ran back upstairs and hurriedly got dressed for work, hoping to see Jethro there. And sure enough when you pulled up in your new car, there was Jethro, leaning on his car again.

“You fucking bastard” you run and hug him, you cry happily into his shoulder. He laughed as you did so.

“Wait wait, I get you a car and you call me Bastard!!!” He exclaimed. “I got something else for you…” he digs his hand into his pocket, another key coming out on his finger.

“Jethro…” you say looking at it as a bright green address tag danced in your eyes.

“Coffee first. Key later” you nodded as you lead him inside.

Time skip~

You ended your shift early to go with Jethro. You blindly tailed him into a nicer apartment complex in a better part of Quatico. Your heart began to flutter as you parked.

You walked into a nice apartment on the 3rd floor. Beautiful black granite kitchen tops, newly installed appliances.

“So…” he says. “What furniture were you thinking you wanted for your new apartment?” He says handing you magazines.

“Holy shit.” You whisper. “This is mine?” He nodded. “This place is mine?” You gasp.

“All paid off. So is the car. And so is your degree.”

“Degree?” You ask. “No you didn’t”

“Yes. I did” he smiled.

“Shut up” you tear up as he passes you a folder. The big words ‘WELCOME TO VIRGINIA TECH’ inscribed. “How did you-“

“Pulled some strings… I think your 1560 SAT score and perfect GPA helped a lot…” he said.

“Oh my god” you cry out jumping into his arms. “I will pay it all back” you say.

“Nope. No need. Just keep being a good girl and I will give you the world” he says.

“Thank you so much!!”

“Of course! You deserve it” he winked. “Now pick out some furniture. It’s your reward for getting into Virginia Tech” you kisses your cheek.

[latenightdaydreams]

Hello! I love your writing !!!

Sooooo I wanted to make an ask

How about the place where the reader works is destroyed and the people killed by könig (and his men) because the company must've done something wrong/ helped könig's enemy

He finds the reader different from the others he murdered (she fights for what she thinks is right instead of bowing down for money or anything you want). And so he pulls the reader out from her hiding spot and snatches her from the world.

He would treat her like a little pet (maybe even collar). Reader would definitely try to fight back.

Maybe even plan an escape and get punished by könig :)

Thxx

Keep up the good work, baby!!!!

Hello!! Thank you!!😘

Mafia!König x Pet!Reader (fem)

MDNI🔞

Master List ✍🏽

>cw: fem/afab, non-con, oral, p in v, mention of blood, mention of violence

1.2k word count

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It’s as if you can remember the day that you met König like it just happened. While you were sitting in your cubicle, you heard a loud agonizing scream echo from beyond the large glass doors that lead to the CEO’s office. You, along with other coworkers, poke your heads up to look towards the doors; exchanging glances of confusion. 

There had been a rumor around the office that the CEO’s ‘raises’ were actually shady dealings with the local mafia. He had started to act erratically over the last few weeks, making the unknown scarier. Then the loud pop of a gun discharging rang out, causing mass panic. 

As everyone around you screamed and tried to flee, armed men dressed in all black filed into the officer area. Bodies began to drop left and right as chaos broke out. You slipped down and crawled across the floor to not be seen as you made your way to your friend’s desk. The fear in her eyes made you feel helpless. 

Without words, you crawled underneath the desk with her and sit; holding her hand as you comforted one another. The next few moments were a blur, but you can recall your white shirt stained red with your friend’s blood and a man pulling you out of your hiding spot. You spat in his face, cursing him while you flailed like a wild animal.

After hours of interrogation, you never broke. No matter how much wealth or power he offered, you never broke. König did consider killing you, but your defiance and adorable angry mug mad him change his mind. In your opinion, death would have been a kinder ending than life the way it is right now.

“Komm her. Sit on my lap.” König speaks softly to you as you kneel before him wearing only a shiny golden collar around your neck.

You stand and approach him cautiously as your eyes roan his face. Without his mask, his face is hard to look at with his upper lip is deformed from a large gash that covers the right side. As you try to distract yourself, you look down at his lap noticing the large erection pressing an outline against his black slacks. 

Against his body you’re small; nothing. He loves the size difference. It adds to the feeling of power that he already holds over you. As you sit, he moves his hands to your hips and squeezes tightly. He rocks you back and forth along his hard cock as he lets out a soft sigh. 

“Did you miss me while I was at work, Kätzchen?”

“Yes…” You say in a low tone, unconvincingly. 

“I said…” König grabs your chin and forces you to face him. “Did you miss me?”

“Yes, master.” The dangerous look in his icy eyes makes you submit.

“Good girl.” He whispers as he continues to grind you into him. “Get my cock out.”

“Yes, master.”

You stand from his lap and turn to kneel in front of him, your knees bruised and borderline bloody from kneeling constantly. His eyes follow your hands as you move to his belt, unfastening it before unzipping his pants. A low sigh of relief leaves König as your warm small hand wraps around his fat cock and slips it out. The strong smell of his musk after a long day of sweating hits your nose.

“Ah, there you go.” He smirks at you as you look at his face with slight disgust. “Go on, play with it.”

You look at him before down at his cock. The bright pink tip being hugged by his foreskin as a bead of precum slowly drips down the side. You wrap your hand around him, pulling the tight foreskin down as you lean forward and lick the small bead. Its taste is bitter on your tongue, mixed with the tangy taste of his sweaty cock causes you to gag slightly. 

König grins as he takes joy in your disgust and discomfort. He reaches out with one hand and pushes your head down further onto his cock. Your soft lips stretch around him uncomfortably as you gag slightly. As he continues to push your head down you try to resist, but it’s no use because he is so much stronger than you. The feeling of your tongue wiggle along his shaft as he shoves himself into your tight throat pulls a moan from him.

“Look at me.” His voice is slightly raspy as he speaks.

Your watery eyes gaze up at him, strained red as you gag and struggle to get any air. His eyes are filled with deviant lust, always making you feel even more shameful for doing this sexual act. You dig your fingers into his muscular thighs, dragging down the fabric of his pants. The lack of air is beginning to get to be too much and you need a break.

Finally, König pulls your head up by your hair. Thick globs of spit fall on to his lap, strings of spit still connecting you to his cock as you gasp for air. Pretty little tears stain your cheeks as you look at him. 

“That was good, longer than last time.” He comments as he strokes his cock. “Come sit.”

You stand and turn, facing away from him to mount his cock. He stops you, forcing you to face him. His hands slip down to your hips, guiding you to him. Your hands rest on his chest as you balance yourself, feeling the head of his cock press against the entrance of your cunt.

“Tell me you want it.”

“I want your cock…” 

“Louder! Mean it!” König slaps your ass harshly.

“I want your cock!” You cry out, your ass stinging from the slap.

König bucks up into you, a loud moan leaving your lips as you dig your nails into his chest. No matter how many times he has you, you never can get used to the size of his cock. He holds you by your hips, forcing you down completely to make sure he shoves every inch of himself inside of you. 

He effortlessly lifts you before slamming you back down harshly onto him. You squeeze your eyes shut as another loud pained moan slips from you. Those little sounds you make only encourage him to continue, you sound so pitiful. 

“Who owns you?” 

“Y- you do.”

“That’s fucking right.” König slaps you across the face, leaving an instant deep red mark. He slouches his body down and grabs your ass, slamming up into harder. The sound of his muscular body hitting your supple flesh echoes throughout his room. 

Down stairs, his guards look at each other and smirk as they listen to him mercilessly fuck you. One of them holds a folder full of transcripts he pulled from the phone records. Your transcripts. He climbs the stairs and knocks on the door, interrupting the both of you.

In anger, König stands; dropping you to the ground as he puts his cock back in his pants. He marches to the door, getting ready to tear into whoever dares interrupt him when he’s playing with his pet. He swings the door open; you lay on the floor naked, looking at the door.

“What?!” 

“Sorry sir, but I think this is more important.” He hands König the manilla folder.

König snatches it, opening the folder. His eyes quickly scan over the documents in silence, taking in everything that he is seeing before him. You’ve been making calls, trying to find a connection to your old boss’s security team and family back home. Without a word, he slams the door shut and turns his gaze to yours. If looks could kill, you’d be dead.

[marcsburnerphone]

And they were roomates

(Captain John price x F!reader)

Summary: the captain wants somewhere more homely to settle down and when an offer like yours comes alight on Zillow he must take up on it.

Warnings: kissy kissy, a little tinsy bit angsty, flirtatious banter, they're going through it in their own ways.

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6- part 7 - part 8 - Part 9 - part 10 - part 11

------------------

You painted small calculated strokes of warm blues and vibrant pinks. No design or carefully articulated picture simply two beautiful contrast colors dancing around each other. You keep on at this for what feels like minutes but ends up being hours. As you mix the two colors in the corner of the canvas and watch the purple hue they create, the sun also greets the ceiling in John's room. It startles you at first then you realize at least you made it through the night. You sit back yawning quietly, your eyes finding their way to John's sleeping form.

“I can feel it when you stare.” you smile softly, something that comes naturally at the sound of his voice.

“That's why I do it.”

“Yeah?” he asks, turning on his back before reaching to prop a pillow up behind his head.

“Yeah.” he admires through his sleepy gaze. You look sad, it fucking kills him. His head then turns further to the left to catch a glimpse of your work.

“Looks nice, just color though?” he asks in a whisper.

“Yeah I don't know, it just felt right.” you shrug, sucking your bottom lip between your teeth.

“Come ere’” he says, reaching out to you and lifting the covers.

You stand carefully placing the brushes and pallet onto the floor furthest from the bed before crawling in beside him. He smells of sleep and john. It's a heavenly scent, something close to pheromones it draws you in so close that you want to crawl inside his skin.

“You know i’ll miss you just as much, I fear even more actually.” he rubs a comforting hand over your back as his deep voice reverberates in his chest.

“Impossible.” you muster up trying to keep your voice from shaking.

“Only impossible thing is making this easy,” he admits. He feels the stutter in your breath as you try to keep yourself from crying. This is scary, scarier than eight guns being pointed at his chest and head. Death doesn't scare John Price, hurting you does.

“When I return we should go on a vacation somewhere on the coast.” 

“We should.” you look up at him and his too perfect lips and too perfect nose and eyes. 

“Don't look at me like that.” 

“Like what?” you say in an innocent tone.

“Like you’re trying to tell me you’ll be my destruction.” you laugh, laying your head on his chest hearing the quick pace of his heart beat.

“You should rest your eyes for a little.” he says worried about the fact that you slept for less than four hours last night.

“Will you stay with me?”

“Always.” he says, running his thick fingers through your hair and down your back. His ways of comforting you are more physical he thinks he knows how to use his body more than his words so he smooths the wrinkles in your bedtime shirt as in to say ‘i’m here for you’ and he swipes the hair out of your face to say ‘don’t worry your pretty head’ and squeezes your bum to say ‘i’m a man of morals, but still a man’.

—------

“Wake up love.” John says softly into your hair before leaving a kiss on your forehead. You groan in annoyance and feel the smile that now rests on his lips.

“What? it's nearly noon and your phone is buzzing in the kitchen.” your eyes slowly open as you flip to face the opposite way.

“How can you even hear that?” you say in a groggy tone.

“I’m not that old.” you laugh smacking at the hand that squeezes your hip.

“You know that's not what I meant.” you say sitting up slowly stretching as your arms rise to the ceiling. 

“You’re unbelievably gorgeous, how’d I get so lucky?” you turn your head to look at him, a rosy blush on your cheeks.

“Oh stop being such a flirt.” you say getting up from the bed and heading out of the room.

“So you just leave me here.” he slightly shouts from the bed. He hears your footsteps halt and turn around. You walk back into the room giving him a quick kiss then pulling him up with all your might.

“There you go.” he says standing on his feet.

“I forgot you need assistance to get out of bed.” he laughs from deep within his chest pulling you back against his front to kiss at your neck. You two walk down the hallway, he stops in the kitchen and you leave to go search for your phone in the living area.

“Aha here it is.” you say holding the small device up in victory. It strikes his heart here and now that in less than another twenty four hours his morning will look nothing like this and the sound of your laugh will be mere motivation.

You make your way back to him dialing back the call from this morning which to no one's surprise is your sister. You gleefully sing a goodmorning into the phone knowing full well that it's the afternoon.

He starts the coffee pot before giving you another quick kiss and heading into his office. It's only then he lets a tear slip, a foolish show of weak emotion, but it just happens to be from the strongest feeling he has ever encountered, love.

Its soul gripping and head spinning. It makes his heart mush, you make his heart mush yet his will strong. You’re a distraction but one he gladly invites into his already busy mind. You poke and prod at a military machine, you’re everything he’s prayed for and more than he ever expected. You even scare him.

“John?” you knock for the fifth time a little concerned.

“Yes darling, come in.” he says quickly, clearing his voice.

“Are you okay?” you ask, holding a warm cup of coffee.

“Yes, just thinking.” you set it softly on the coaster you had given him when you realized the water stains popping up all over the surface.

“Thankyou.” you nod, reaching your hand out to cup his chin. You give him a slow soft kiss, one on the lips then one to his cheek before leaving.

You’ve noticed when he works he tends to be more serious and quiet therefore you don't think too much but that doesn't mean it's not resting in the back of your mind. You shut the door softly and go on about your day.

—-------

just a glimpse into their relationship before John departs.

i've missed you guys terribly sorry for my long absence<3

@beebeechaos @ttsbaby01 @arminarlertssword @quakeroaksguy @rafaelacallinybbay @bumblebeesfromvenus @glitterypirateduck @midnights-song @lovelythingsinternal @fruitymoonbeams-blog @kkaaaagt @kit-williams @enfppuff @kythefangirl25 @eviltheleon @here4thespice @dclore22 @raethethey @waves-against-a-cliff @novausstuff @darling006 @vampirekilmerfic @Dreams-of-qian-qian @spngingerbread21 @thepumpkinqueen93 @copiasratscheese @youdontknowe @spyderdoll @angels-gonna-play @viisgrave @lieutenantlashfaz @sunndust @beckythecatqueen-blog @aoioozora @o-birdseed-o @mothmothmothmothmothmoth @ihateuguys @oversensitivitea @spicyspicyliving

[aangelinakii]

Hi I saw that your requests were open and I wanted to know if you would be interested in writing a headcanon where Jason's s/o is also a vigilante (they have powers maybe, like Violet Parr's with force field and invisibility); and strangely enough the villains quite like them (in a platonic way) they don't mind reader at all and actually have a type of frenemy thing going on? Wouldn't it be funny if while fighting the villains would just be like "I'll kill you Red hood! You too Batman and... oh hey reader!vigilante name :D how you doing? Have you thought about my invitation to the villains party?!"

If you accept my ask you can make as crack fic as you want, it is a funky prompt so 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ but feel comfortable to decline also 💖

-🎃

TWO FRENEMIES WITH FRIES ON THE SIDE.

— you're alright. him, however...

summary : you're on patrol with your equally as vigilante boyfriend, when you come across some havoc in the night. the two of you need to work together to defeat them. but it's less easy for jason tonight.

before you read : this will be a superrr unserious fic, so if you aren't prepared for some silly stuff to happen, you just aren't on the level of this fic

note : thank you so so much for requesting pumpkin !! or is that a jack o lantern ??? either way, i love your anon emoji, and i thought this request was so funny !! i turned it into a fic instead of headcanons because i had a better idea for it, so i hope it's what you wanted !!! again, thank you for requesting ml <3

second note : sorry it took a few days to write up,, i went through a mini writer's block, but i hope it's enjoyable nonetheless 🫶🫶

when you and jason had left the apartment to go on patrol that evening, neither of you had really been expecting to find the condiment king breaking into a closed mcdonald's to steal their condiments. and of course it had to have been you two to find him.

no one ever wanted to come across the condiment king. you're probably sitting here assuming it's because of how indubitably evil he is, and how his plans always invoke terror into the streets of gotham; the reason no one wants to find him is because it will make the night a lot of work in terms of saving the city.

well, you're wrong. sure, he made the night far harder than it needed to, by squirting ketchup and mayo all over your patrol gear.

one, it made you stink for the rest of patrol – and when you're out looking after the city, you can't exactly go home and change. two, it's incredibly difficult to get out of clothes, for the condiment king had chemically altered his condiments of attack to thicken when oxidising; it's like trying to get sticky tapioca out of a metal sift.

he'd spotted jason first, who'd jumped down from the shadows to apprehend him. after all, the condiment king had only just bust the door open; he was quite a poor excuse for one of gotham's villains.

there was joker, penguin, two-face... for batman's case, he'd encountered space villains, which seem a lot scarier due to their near-invincible powers.

but you two had been stuck with the condiment king.

"AH!" he screamed, jumping back at the sight of the taller male, scrambling for his tubes and fire-guns. "you shouldn't be here!"

"me?" jason gravelled from beneath his red helmet, his head tilting and white eyes glowing menacingly. "i think we both have two very different ideas about that."

without warning, red and yellow squirted all over jason's front, causing him to step back in surprise, groaning at the growing stench.

before him, the condiment king yelped as his condiment guns were kicked from his grasp, as you sprung from the shadows.

"no can do, buddy," you breathed, watching his guns scatter to the ground, the tubes attached to their bottoms popping as they ripped from the bottles. "besides, haven't you heard about the boycott? why not use taco bell nacho cheese?"

the condiment king gasped, stepping back as you arrived, though his worry ceased quickly as he registered the sight of you. "oh, (name)! didn't realise you were out tonight."

"didn't realise you were, either, buddy."

you moved to stand behind him, taking his wrists and pinning them against his back, slapping a pair of cuffs against the skin. "but you understand why i have to do this, right?"

with a sigh, the condiment king nodded, his stature weakening. "yeah, i suppose so... hey, did you ever receive my invitation?"

"invitation?" the red hood repeated wearily, hands still avoiding his messy now-orange chest.

"uh.. i did, yeah," you chuckled as you tightened the handcuffs around his wrists. "i'll have to see if you can make it, yeah? find someone to bail you out if you can."

"invitation?" jason repeated once more. "what invitation?"

with a smile, the condiment king looked up at the red hood, completely disregarding the sauce he'd messed his clothes up with. "it's my birthday in a few weeks. i invited (name) and some other people, no big deal."

from behind his mask, jason looked over at you, and you could practically feel his quizzical glare on you. "you were invited to this nutter's birthday party?"

nonchalant as ever, you gave a nod, accompanying it with a half-shrug. "yeah, i'd ask to invite you, but something tells me you wouldn't be too wanted there."

[winchestersisterimaginessss]

Request: Hi!!! Could you please do a Winchester!sister fic where her and dean love doing prank wars and Sam is kind of against it knowing how far both Dean and y/n could go and he says someone would end up getting hurt but they do the prank wars anyway, and she wants to pull off a choking prank but accidentally ends up actually choking

A/N: OKAY THIS ONE WAS SO FUN TO WRITE!! Also I wrote the boy who cried werewolf bc I felt like it was more fitting and put a spin on the supernatural world lol. I hope you enjoy and I hope this was what you were looking for! If not just send in another request. Requests are also open so please ask me to write something. I’m open to anything!

Pairings: Dean and Sam x Sister!Reader

You shrieked as Dean chased you through the halls.

“Get back here!” He shouted, gaining on you.

You ran to the library hoping to find Sam. As soon as you turned the corner you saw him and sighed in relief.

“Sammy!” You squealed, running at him with full force with Dean on your tail.

“What!” He yelled, alarmed that there was something wrong.

“Help me!” You screamed, laughing as you grabbed him and shoved him towards Dean.

“Sorry, that’s not going to work kiddo,” Dean said as he dodged Sam and lunged at you.

“No!” You screamed. “Sam please!” Your heart was pounding as you shrieked.

Dean grabbed you and held you down as he shook out his cold soaking wet hair all over you.

You fell to the ground squealing, “no, no, no, no!”

Dean laughed, “that’s what you get for dumping it on me while I was sleeping!” He said.

“Oh here we go.” Sam sighed, understanding what was now going on.

“I only did that because you put toothpaste in the Oreos!” You said in disbelief. “What did you even do with the creme?!” You asked.

“I scraped it out of each cookie, put it all in a bowl and I ate it,” he smirked at you knowing it was your favorite.

You gasped, “how dare you!”

“You know what kid?” He asked. “I think you just declared prank wars.” He finished.

“Yeah I’ve declared them and I’m gonna win them,” you sassed.

Sam groaned and looked between the two of you. “You two have to be careful. You both take things way too far and someone’s going to get hurt.” He said, giving you a look knowing it was probably going to be you.

You looked at him and then smirked at Dean, “it’s not going to be me who gets hurt.”

Dean squinted his eyes at you, “oh yeah?” He said before faking a lunge at you.

You squealed, ready to run before you realized he wasn’t actually going to go after you.

You put your hand to your chest to control your heart rate, “oh it’s so on.”

Dean agreed and Sam rolled his eyes— he just knew it was going to end badly.

——-

Sam was out interviewing someone for the case that the three of you were on and Dean ran out to go pick up some food for dinner. You were laying in your bed when you heard creepy carnival music blast through the bunker. You froze in place and felt your heart drop. There was nothing scarier than a circus and everything that was involved with them. More importantly clowns. You and Sam had that fear in common. You jumped up in bed when you heard one of the doors of the bunker slam. You immediately went to reach for your gun, but couldn’t find it. Thats weird, you thought. You almost always had your gun there and it wasn’t like you to misplace a freaking gun. You were absolutely terrified and completely unsettled. You slowly tiptoed to your door before you looked out of it. Your heart dropped to your toes when you saw the scariest most creepy clown you’ve ever seen in your entire life standing at the end of the hall. Your breath got caught in your throat as you made a run for it. Your only fighting chance was to run and hide at this point until one of your brothers got back. You were too terrified to even think about how a haunted killer monster clown got into the bunker in the first place. As you turned the corner in the hallway you rammed right into the clown. You fell down and slammed your head against the floor. You whimpered in pain and started screaming in bloody terror. Your absolute worse fear came true and you started sobbing. Sure you fought monsters, but the creepy music blasting and your worst fear ready to kill you, completely shut you down. You were hysterical and closed your eyes waiting for the inevitable end.

“What’s wrong?!” You heard Sam shout from the end of the hallway and it was all you needed to gain an ounce of strength back. You scrambled up without even glancing at the clown and charged towards Sam.

“Sam!” You screamed. You were still bawling your eyes out inconsolable as you flung yourself into his arms.

“Hey, hey, hey, hey, what’s wrong?” He asked, looking down the hallway. That’s when he saw Dean in a clown costume and the mask in his hand.

“There’s a c-cl-clown,” you screamed in between your sobs. You were trying to pull him down the hallway implying that they needed to run, but he held you steady in his arms. That freaked you out even more so you started flailing your limbs to escape.

“We need to run!” You screeched, terrified of the clown getting to you.

“Hey kiddo! It’s just Dean, it’s okay, it’s just Dean!” He said trying to get you to calm down in his arms. You snapped your head towards the direction of the clown and saw Dean standing there in half the costume. You collapsed into Sam’s arms in relief.

“You’re safe, it’s okay.” Sam whispered as he felt your heart beat pounding through your body. You took a deep breath in to try to calm yourself down.

“That’s it bug, breathe.” Sam said as he sent his brother a glare.

“Really Dean?” Sam sighed as he walked closer to the both of you.

He shot Sam an oops look before placing a hand on your shoulder.

“That was way too far De,” you whimpered.

“I’m sorry kid…” Dean trailed off. “Does that mean I win?” He asked.

——-

Dean really thought he was going to win prank wars and you were not going to let that happen. He went far, but you could go even further.

You were sitting at the table with Dean, eating the breakfast you made. Sam preferred to go grab a smoothie so it was just you two and the prank was going perfectly. You swallowed your food, but stood up from your chair gasping and grabbing your throat. You looked at Dean with wide eyes, practically begging him for help.

“Are you choking!” Dean shouted as he stood up. You continued to gasp for air and Dean rushed over to you. He started pounding your back, but you continued to gasp.

“Come on kid!” He screamed, frantically. When he realized it wasn’t working, he started giving you the heimlich. You let it go on for about 30 more seconds before you burst out laughing. He let you go and you fell to your knees. You rolled into your back and pointed up at him.

“Got ya!” You said, cracking up.

He looked at you pissed, “that’s really not funny. THAT was too far.” He said.

You continued to chuckle, “does that mean I win?” You asked sarcastically, mocking him from when he pranked you.

“No seriously that’s not funny. What if you really need help one day and I won’t think you’re serious so I don’t help you. Are you the boy who cried werewolf?” He asked.

You gave him a bitch face, “I wouldn’t cry werewolf Dean, I would just kill it.” You sassed, matter of factly.

He sighed, “you know that’s not what I meant.” He said and rolled his eyes. “It’s officially gone too far kid, I tap out. You win.” He said defeatedly.

“Wahooooo!” You cheered before he interrupted you.

“Yeah only because this has officially gone too far and I don’t need you getting hurt.” He stared you down.

“Whatever! I won, I won, I won, I won!” You exclaimed as he huffed.

——-

The three of you sat eating dinner at the table. “Prank wars are over Sammy and I won!” You bragged as you stuffed your face with food.

“Yeah only because you took it way too far.” Dean said, trying to explain his defeat.

“You took it too far first!” You yelled trying to defend your win.

Sam sighed and rolled his eyes. “You both take things way too far and I’m just glad it stopped before someone got seriously hurt.” He said as you shoved more French fries into your mouth.

You started to say something back to him, but accidentally swallowed a fry at the same time. You felt it get stuck in your throat and you jumped out of your chair.

You grabbed both of your brothers attention with your sudden movements and you looked at them both with wide eyes. You tried breathing in, but gasped for air instead.

“Are you choking?” Sam gasped. You shook your head, panicked.

“Y/N Stop! Sam she’s pranking us.” He said clearly pissed off at your antics.

You looked at him with terrified eyes. This was it. You really were the boy who cried werewolf and now you were going to die in front of your brothers because they thought you were pranking them. What were the odds? As you fell to the ground wheezing what you felt like was going to be your last attempt at life, Sam rushed to you. He grabbed you from behind and started giving you the heimlich. You were trembling in his arms, fighting for your life until you spit the French fry out on the floor. As Sam loosened his grip on you, he felt you weakly collapsing. He grabbed you and held you tighter to prevent you from hitting the floor.

“You’re okay bug, you’re okay.” He calmly spoke as you gasped for air. You let out a strangled cry and felt Sam rub your back.

“It’s alright, I got you, breathe.” He said trying to calm you down. Once you got control of your breathing and your emotions you looked up at Dean. He stared at you in shock, not knowing what the hell just happened.

“Are you okay?” He asked getting out of his seat once the shock left his body.

You sent him a shaky thumbs up and relaxed into Sam’s arms. Dean squatted down in front of you and ran a hand down the side of your head. He sighed in relief, “sorry, I really thought you were pranking me one last time.” He said.

You pinched the bridge of your nose and shook your head.

“No more pranks ever again,” you said shakily.

Dean nodded and pulled you up from the floor.

Sam stood up after you and shook his head. “It always ends bad. You two are officially banned from prank wars.” He sighed.

[thesimulacrasimp]

Okay so im gonna just throw randomly my thoughts on sm6 while rewatching it cuz why not, I was doing the same thing for hazbin hotel so why not spooky month too?

So yeah, SPOOKY MONTH 6 SPOILERS WARNING‼️

Ok im just gonna say: that starting scene with thieves was kinda funny. Also rewatching it, im starting to suspect that this giant spider thing in Lilas attic have her husbands soul, IDK WHY, I JUST FEEL LIKE IT, it just looks so important, it even appeared twice in the ep: in the begining n in the end.

Also ARE WE JUST GONNA IGNORE HOW JAUNE CALLED LILA "HOT STUFF"??? WHILE HAVING A HUSBAND?????? A HUSBAND THAT SITTING NEARBY HER WHEN SHE SAYING THAT???????? ARE THEY IN A POLY RELATIONSHIPS HOLY FUCKING SHIT????????????? IM EVEN MORE INTRIGED NOW

Okay so Skid does know and remember his dad, I just was thinking that his father left/died when Skid still wasnt born or when he was very little so Skid doesnt even know that he had a father, but no he does remember his dad, so that means he presented for quite long time in Skids life.

Also im really suprised how big Pumps house is, well i mean— he said that his parents work alot so ig i shouldnt be suprised-

Poor Ignacio just wants some peace– *watched the ep a lil longer* Oh hes kinda fucked up actually---

Also for some reason i find kinda interesting that Ross n Rob were kinda comforting Roy every time they were on the screen like "We're here for you, Roy" etc etc, so im thinking maybe something bad happened to Roy? I mean he looked kinda frustrated n angry, so maybe somethng between him n his parents?

Okay but can we talk about how Moloch look so much more scarier than before?

Okay so--- get ready for my rambleling bout my boy Dexter-- HE LIVED WITH HIS MOM N ALOT OF CATS😭😭😭 N HIS MOMS PURE GRIEF BOUT HER LOSS WAS GENIUNALY SO SAD TO WITNESS 😭😭😭😭

Okay so looking at Skids impression when Father Gregor asked him bout his father-- yeah i think his dad actually died---- but i can be wrong ofc

Okay- im sorry but-- why does Kevin n Radfords interactions make them look like a couple--- I AM SORRY BUT----

Also the way Father Gregor gave Kevin holy water was really funny to me, it was like: "You know these children?? Yeaahhhh i feel bad for u, kid. Here have some holy water, just in case...." ALSO the fact that ppl started coming in the store ONLY after Radford sprinkled holy water in it-- DOES THAT MEAN THAT THERE WERE DEMONS IN IT THAT WERE KEEPING PPL AWAY???

Dont mind me guys, im just a little crying :')

Okay but the way how Skid n Pump were SO exited to see Moloch again was really funny n cute at the same time

Okay... This is the part when i literally teared up. I know it was just Moloch trying to fool Father Gregor to give him kids but idk.... It still made me tear up for some reason, and i even know the reason: i just miss Dexter so much n i didnt expect him to appear so much times in this ep, I just think hes a precious boy who deserved better. I KNOW THAT HE WAS KILLING ANIMALS N I DONT APPROVE THAT AT ALL, but hes still a sweetie idfc.

Also why would Patty need a gun so immediatly?..

Also that part when Moloch were wandering around the town n Father n spooky bois were trying to catch him was so funny and entertaining

Poor Pelo got ooffed again. Press F.

AND OMG THIS PART WHEN MOLOCH POSSESED SKID N PUMPS BODIES AND THE FATHER EXORCISMS THEM WAS SOOOO COOL, I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY, I THINK I JUST HAVE A THING FOR DEMONS N EXORCISM.

And this is the part where i actually cried alot. Poor Skid doesnt know that its not his fault at all.. Also even if Father Gregors words were kinda mean, that Lila is irresponsible mother, I cant disagree with them. Yes, she is an alone mother, but it doesnt give her permission to just leave her child to himself n his friend n go drink n then spent time w her child drunk. Yeah i know, that she leaves him to mr Wonder n Susie, but lets be honest, were here even a single time when the kids didnt just leave the house n cause problem? No. So i think the Fathers words are make perfect sense, n Lila should think bout it. Also a lil thing i just thought bout, why would Lila throw away her husbands stuff? If he actually died why would she do this? Or hes not dead n he just left for some reason? Idk

Also OMFG THAT OOGA BOOGA JUMPSCARE GOT ME SO FUCKING GOOD, I WASNT READY FOR AT ALL

and so ummm i think thats it. It took me 1 hour to write this lol.

[midnightsimpsstuff]

A LUNATIC'S BRIDE

Summary: You are Joker's new obsession even though you truly do not want him.

Word count: 1.6k

a/n: I just imagined this as I was listening to Gangsta by Kehlani and I got an idea so I hope you guys love it.

Being Bruce Wayne's assistant had its perks, but the perks started during your third year of working with him. That included allowing you max out his card on dresses to accompany him to galas, being seen with him in public, knowing he's batman, training because in a way you are now at threat.

It was a fun lifestyle, if you remove having to drive like a lunatic when paparazzi is getting out of hand, and babysitting his adopted and biological sons when he can't take care of them; which is very weird because Dick is older than you, or waking up at early hours of the day to go to his house and make sure he gets ready then the worst of all, obsessed villains that think getting you or getting rid of you is the only way Batman would love them and you would have to show your fighting skills that is always unfair because there are always more of them than you.

But the worst of all the lunatics has to be the Joker, you were terrified of him, mainly because he loved you, almost as much as he loved his 'Batsy' and he really loved his Batsy.

A little around the time he broke up with Harley Quinn was the time you began working with Bruce, and when he saw both of you standing together he 'didn't know who to choose from' he would tell you a couple months later when he first kidnapped you.

It got to the point when he is fighting batman he would say dumb shit like "Bring our wife with you next time" which you purposely decided the fact he called you his wife and only think about the fact he also called you Bruce Wayne's wife, but he was far to old for you sadly, both of them were actually but that didn't stop you from blushing the first few times and neither did it stop Joker from flirting with you every chance he got.

Maybe it's leaving flowers with a note at your front door, flowers that have a camera inside so he can watch you from where he is. Obviously Bruce also has gotten many of them, so when he found himself at your apartment waiting for you to get ready, he told you to throw them out and when you asked why, let's just say you never accepted flowers from anyone again when you received a text message from an unsaved number asking why you threw away his love for you.

You were walking on your own a couple of months after that, on your way to the Wayne manor, it was very early and Alfred wasn't available to carry you with the limousine so you had to walk. You forgot to take your guard dog with you so you were suffering your consequences when you were dragged into an alleyway by some weirdo touching you inappropriately saying something about boss saying they should see if you're good enough.

Luckily, Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy had come to your rescue, immediately killing the man and befriending you but what Harley had told you was by far scarier than the sad predicament you just got into, "Girl, you have to protect yourself more, you know you are now the lunatic's bride. He might love you as much as he love his batsy."

You thanked them before rushing to work, this time in a cab, now with a borrowed gun from Ivy just incase the driver is also a worker from the Joker.

You were undeniably late for the day, you were supposed to wake up Bruce Wayne with Alfred as you brief him with what he is supposed to do and help him get dressed.

But when you had came, he was still in a towel, luckily done having his bath but not dressed, saying something about waiting for you because you always make him look his best.

As you were getting him ready, you two engaged in the short conversations you would usually have, and you realise it was your mistake entirely when you had spilled to Bruce about what had happened that morning and you knew it even more when you had to attend to Bruce's injuries from when he went to beat up Joker and felt worse when he had kidnapped you and beat you up the same way Batman had beat him. Although he tended to your scars after it didn't make it any better, especially because he wasn't being careful because you never told him where Harley was.

When Nightwing had come to save you, you were a shaking mess, he was happy you looked better than his brother did but he knew you were going to be scarred for life with what just happened, after beating up the Joker's henchmen he went away with you crying in his arms saying something about wanting to quit.

He reassured you all would be fine, but you both knew you weren't sure about it but you allowed him deceive you as you both scaled buildings before you finally found yourself in your home, still terrified and shaking you begged him to stay with you.

And you looked so shakined up that he couldn't refuse, that's when you both realised you had a lot in common and you two learned to enjoy each other's company.

Bruce let you take a break because he felt truly sorry for you and all the sixty days of that break you spent it with Dick, realising how fun he truly could be, simply enjoying you boths company.

He told you about his long-distance open relationship wife, Starfire, and you told him about the fact you don't date just fuck around from time to time.

That was the day you both first had sex with each other, it was great you'd both tell each other the next day, but when you find out Joker kidnapped Nightwing and tortured him a bit before Dick found a way to escape you both knew you could never do that again, but that didn't stop you.

You became even stronger by time went by, you and Dick began dating along the way, you felt bad for his wife that was on another planet entirely but when you finally met her she told you that it was perfectly fine that she was happy for you both.

But she had kissed you which was really weird but you found out it's just her way of communication and you had to fight the urge to not ask her to do it again because your dating her husband but when she kissed you again you knew your life was just crazy.

Joker kidnapped you that very day Starfire went back to her planet after you guy's platonic make out session and put laughing gas on you as he forcefully made out with you, he tried to rape you that very moment, he had began laying hickeys when Batman and Robin had come in and began beating him and his henchmen up.

Damian recognised you immediately and felt sympathy for one of the first times in his life, you didn't deserve this, his baby sitter, his kind of sister-in-law and his friend he brutally killed most of the henchmen leaving the others hurt.

Batman would scold him later that they were heroes and heroes don't kill, he wouldn't listen, throw in a "They deserved it" and go upstairs.

As your at home trying to heal, Harley and Ivy would come over and let you cry on their shoulders, you couldn't bring it in you to see Dick, but he understood.

Harley helped you get rid of the hickeys that had decided to not go, that reminded you of the pain you had just felt and you all would hug then cuddle while licking ice cream and watching a rom-com.

When you finally gained the courage to see Dick he engulfed you in a big hug and said he wasn't mad that it wasn't your fault, and it would make all the tears come back to you and he would comfort you to sleep before giving you hickeys of his own to help you forget.

Later on you would find out Bruce had sex with the Joker to get him off your tail it had worked and the Joker stopped disturbing you for such a long time that Dick was able to propose to you and you two were engaged when Joker came looking for you again.

This time you were ready though, as he tried to kidnap you with his disguises you shot him and walked away. Joker obviously didn't die but he knew he had ruined you for life and that was all he truly wanted.

For you to be ruined, for you to be corrupted and destroyed by him, and he laughed as his henchmen patched him off and he laughed when he got a life sentence for all the shit he had put you through.

He ended up escaping jail, of course he did but he never disturbed you again but he knew you would never forget him ever in your life.

And that was all he wanted, for his bride to be a lunatic, he gifted you flowers on your wedding day. Flowers that you burnt and you didn't know he was watching you burn them with a smile on your face but a smile on his face too. He had finally gotten what he wanted.

As he opened a random creepy book of his that he was gifted. "Burning flowers, a sign of love and devotion" he knew he had won, he knew he had gotten everything he could have ever wanted.

The good part of you.

[sga-owns-my-soul]

hey I really like your fics and it's my birthday today! do you think you could write a little snippet where Rodney takes John to the symposium in brain storm instead and they're tag team bitchy 🥺🥺🥺 pretty pretty please 🥺🥺🥺

happy birthday!!!!! i hope you had an absolutely wonderful day and i apologize that this took so long! i hope you enjoy 🥰💜

"Rodney McKay?"

John immediately felt giddy when he recognized the voice as The Bill Nye. John turned in excitement to see him and Neil DeGrasse Tyson approaching, but his excitement dropped as soon as he saw the look on Rodney's face.

"We had it on good authority that you were... dead," Nye continued, and John suddenly understood why Rodney looked so bothered.

"Nope, he's actually very good at keeping himself and others alive. Been doing it for a few years now, even. Hi, Lt. Colonel John Sheppard," John said, and if he maybe looked a little bit scarier than he usually did when he introduced himself, well, he could hardly be blamed for that.

"Lt. Colonel? How do you know Rodney?" Tyson asked, looking surprised, and maybe a bit nervous, and that certainly made John feel a little smug.

"We work together," Rodney said quickly, glancing at John.

"You work with the U.S. military?" Nye questioned.

"Yeah it's uhh, it's-"

"Confidential. Pretty cool though," John answered in his casual drawl, smirking at Nye and Tyson. They exchanged a look.

"Right... Uhh, well... It was good to see you, McKay. And uhh, nice to meet you?" Tyson said, backing up a few steps before turning and pulling Nye back to whoever they were previously talking to.

"Thanks. That was... actually kind of bearable," Rodney said with a sigh of relief. John smiled at him.

"Come on, let's go get our seats early," John said, throwing an arm protectively around Rodney's shoulder as they made their way into the auditorium.

--

"That's- that's my bridge!" Rodney whispered harshly, and John clenched his teeth.

"I thought it looked familiar. It's the one you and Jeannie built, isn't it? John asked quietly. Rodney nodded as that Tunney guy continued spouting off how he was going to save the planet- and John almost scoffed, because Rodney had saved the planet- multiple times- and even he didn't feel the need to brag to everyone about it.

At least not this arrogantly.

"Okay, I've heard enough," John said, sliding out of his seat. Rodney followed on instinct.

"Where are we going?" Rodney whispered as they made their way through the seats. John turned back to answer when he was interrupted.

"Doctor McKay, leaving so soon?" Tunney called, and suddenly every face in the auditorium turned to John and Rodney. John's hand instinctively twitched for the gun he didn't have.

"Yeah, sorry, that's my fault. I forgot about some... important business we need to urgently take care of," John called back, his casual drawl masking the anger vibrating through him.

"Well, I'm sure it can wait until the presentation is over," Tunney shot back, a smug grin on his face. "I'm sure McKay would be fascinated by my discovery."

John clenched his fists as he glanced at Rodney, who was looking equal parts furious and embarrassed. He opened his mouth, and John shot him a look.

"Well, considering this work is shockingly similar to work he did with me and the U.S. military two years ago, I don't think it'll be that exciting to him. Thanks for the hospitality, but we need to go," John said, his tone leaving no room for argument. "Come on Rodney, we're leaving."

"You... you stood up for me," Rodney said when they got back into the lobby, and John was so busy looking for a phone it took him a second to process what Rodney said.

"Of course I stood up for you, that asshole was stealing your work. And he clearly isn't going to be able to prevent the issues we had last time with Rod, and I really don't need another alternate version of us showing up here of all places. We need to get to a phone so we can call the SGC, get this guy shut down." John was moving through the lobby again, looking for a landline, when he noticed Rodney was still just standing there. "What?"

"You didn't even hesitate. You just... thank you," Rodney said, and John was so taken back by the genuine sincerity he almost forgot about the matter at hand.

"Tell you what, if you help me find a phone so I can call Landry, you can make the announcement to everyone that Tunney is getting arrested for stealing top secret work that you came up with, okay? But we really need to call Landry before that machine gets started up."

Rodney beamed.

"I think I love you," Rodney said, like it was the most casual thing in the world, before pointing and leading John down the hallway to what must have been office space. Johns heart fluttered in response.

[pixellangel]

guys. i'm making an rpg.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

so i bought rpg maker vx ace* and ive been coming up with a plot and characters!!!!! and im gonna make a video game!!!! aaaa!!!

its a meta little cyberpunk rpg starring you, the protagonist in someone else's body, and your allies V, Xenon, and Kori (names subject to change). infodump and some doodles under the cut read for a fun time :3

*edit: ill actually be doing it in rpg maker mv! vx is a little limited for the scope of what i want to do with this project

welcome to under the cut. here's thirty billion information for you. :D

essentially, the plot revolves around V and the player finding people who have been wronged by the Narrator, who bends the story to his own will to create a plot he enjoys, and how they want to shape their own destinies. your goal is to defeat the group of cybernetic monsters that he created as villains.

YOUR PARTY CONSISTS OF

- Sylvie (she/they): that's you! everyone calls you "Player," though. your body used to belong to V's childhood friend before the Narrator decided they were the perfect base for a protagonist. general all rounder in combat, with a basic sword for a weapon. you want to find out more about the Narrator's goals and what happened to V's friend. also, why are you "Sylvie?"

- V (she/her): a firey girl who can hear the Narrator speaking. she teaches the player how the world works, and is the first person they meet. uses two daggers in combat, efficient and quick fighter. immediately tells the player she plans not to befriend them. wants to fight the Narrator for taking her childhood friend away from her for the sake of a story.

- Xenon (he/they): wears a completely black mask with a white X on it to hide their identity. miraculously, this works despite their neon green hair. graffiti artist. medic in combat with both single and multi target heal skills. fights w/ a paintball gun. grew up in a cult that thinks death is such a natural part of life that it should never be prevented. became a medic as a type of rebellion against his cult.

- Kori (she/her): TINY GAL. HUGE HAMMER. VERY YELLOW. self explanatory combat - high attack, big damage, hits hard. not much else. she's actually super sweet, but the giant electric hammer she carries around makes her seem way scarier than she is. really really wants to be helpful. she lives in a town based around fighting and fight clubs, so she had to learn to defend herself to survive.

some doodles of V and Xenon :3

ill draw the whole lineup soon!!! :D

also if anyone wants more info or has questions PLEASE ASK!!! I LOVE LOREDUMPING!!! anyway my tag for this Huge Project is #pixell.rpg :3

[lovemebutleavemewild]

Leave it to the land - Chapter 1

Summary: The world has ended, it's over—except some people can't seem to accept that. Those same people think the cure lies in people like you and your little sister. And they're willing to do anything to find it.

The road to safety is a long one, and you're about to learn that it isn't one you can walk alone. Read it on ao3.

Shoving aside a pile of old newspapers, you see a packet of spaghetti pushed into the corner of the shelf. A triumphant hiss leaves you as you grab it. Added to the two tins of tomatoes you also found and it’s as good a meal as you’ve had in a while.

Thinking you’d rather not push your luck, you move quickly back among the shelves, at a half crouch. You’re at the edge of the aisle, by the counter when you see the movement out of the corner of your eye. You duck back instinctively, breath catching in your throat.

The first thing you notice about the guy is his size. The second thing, and more worrying by far, is the gun held low against his body. His head is turning slowly side to side and you realise he's sweeping the aisles and heading your way. You start to backtrack up the aisle you just came down, slowly so as not to alert him to your presence. The remnants of the contents from the shelves litter the floor and you're terrified you'll kick something and attract his attention.

You can hear him approaching and you're not going to make it, he's going to see you. And then suddenly, there is a noise, a thump of something hitting the ground from the other side of the shop.

You feel relief for a fraction of a second and then, abruptly, terror. You speed back up the aisle, not caring about the noise now. When you get to the top, you see that the man isn't even facing you anymore. He's moved his gun to rest on his shoulder and is moving towards the door to the storeroom, where he's clearly heard the noise you just did.

He's less than two steps away from it and stretching out a hand and you don't even think. Running towards him, you pull out a small pocket knife, your only weapon and leap onto his shoulders.

You swing your arm around to his front, knife in hand to try and stab his stomach but you swing too wide and completely miss.

And then you're being ripped from his back and whirled around, your body slammed against a wall. He grabs your arm and slams it next to you, so hard you’re sure your elbow has cracked. You immediately drop your knife.

“What the fuck?” the man hisses. You look up at him, determined not to let show on your face how fucked you know you are. The guy is at least a head taller than you and built. The one hand he's using to grip you by the neck of your shirt is enough to hold you up so your toes only brush the floor. His other hand points his gun at you—it's too long for the close range, so he has to twist his arm back to shove it in your face. Still effective though.

The pressure on your neck is starting to hurt. You kick out at him but he avoids your feet easily.

“Put me down” you huff and to your surprise, he does actually loosen his grip so you can get your feet back under you. He takes a small step back. This has the benefit of leaving you free but the disadvantage of giving him back both hands; he immediately returns his free hand to the gun pointing at you.

“What's your problem? he asks. Now that you can get a closer look, he’s wearing a military-style vest, pockets filled with more weapons, hair cut into a severe mohawk.

“You need to let me go,” you tell him, trying to sound braver than you feel. He snorts.

“That right? And why’s that?”

“Because- because, I have a group nearby and if I’m not back soon, they’ll come and get me!” The man cocks his head to the side, then presses a radio on his shoulder.

“Think that's true, LT?” he asks. There's no answer and you feel a spring of hope.

Your heart drops to your stomach as the door of the shop opens and another man steps inside. This guy is objectively a lot scarier. He's a few inches taller and wearing a black balaclava with a faded white skull painted on it. And, of course, he’s also armed.

“Negative” he says, seemingly answering the man's question. “Perimeter is clear.”

You're really starting to panic now. You hold your hands up.

“Look, I think I made a mistake here—please, I just panicked. Can't you just- just let me go?”

The man moves closer to the new arrival to say something you can't hear. He's relaxed his hold on his gun slightly but you still keep your hands up. You try to keep your eyes on them.

The man in the mask is still staring at you. It's disconcerting. You wish you could hear what they were saying. After a minute, the masked man nods very slightly and the other turns to you and jerks his head.

“Go on,” he tells you.

You stay frozen.

“What?”

Mohawk raises his eyebrows, then flaps his hand in your direction.

“Go, get out of here. Limited time offer, doll. Better move.”

You still don't move and despite your best efforts, your eyes flick to the door of the storeroom. It's just for a second but as soon as you snap your eyes away, you know you're screwed. Skull face was still looking at you and now his eyes are moving from you to the door.

When he steps toward the door, you mirror his movement, putting yourself in his path. He puts a hand on your shoulder so quickly you don't have time to dodge it, and then he shoves you hard into the wall.

You fall halfway to your knees before you're scrambling to your feet, only to find yourself, once again, on the wrong end of mohawk man’s gun.

You're winded, panting slightly and looking at the man in the skull mask. He's got a hand on the doorknob now.

“Don't” you whisper. His head cocks slightly but he doesn't look at you this time. He slips a handgun from his belt and swings the door open, aiming it inside.

You can't stand it now and dive after him. You hear the Scotsman curse and scramble after you. You duck around the masked man and you know the only reason you haven't been shot by either of them is that you keep surprising them with your stupidity.

You face the men again, arms spread and you feel small hands touch your back but you can't turn to look now. The urge to turn and check on the little girl behind you is hard to ignore, but you resist it.

“Look, I'm sorry. We'll go, we're going!”

You sound frantic, even to your own ears and you're well aware that you're blocked in. You raise your hands higher to show you're not a threat and your sleeve slips down, just slightly. Skull face’s eyes flicker to your wrist.

“What's that?”

Your hand automatically goes to pull your sleeve back but he raises his gun another inch and you freeze.

“Nothing, it isn't anything!”

“You're marked,” he says.

“No!” Your voice is a confession in itself and you know it.

“Ghost, we've got company.” You'd almost forgotten the man in the mohawk, leaning against the door, until he speaks again. You watch as he ducks out of the room, pulling a knife from his belt as he goes. He's back in a few minutes and this time he steps into the room with the rest of you, closing the door behind him. The storeroom is dim now and you take a deep breath and try to make your voice calmer, placating.

“We can work something out here,” you tell the men.

“Why, you got stuff to trade?” the man you can now call Ghost, says. Before you can answer he's ducking to grab the backpack at your feet. The hand now clutching your trouser leg tightens and you hear her whimper quietly when he gets close. He rifles through it and you use the time to try to think because you have nothing to trade, as they're about to discover. And people who are marked, people like you … they'd be rewarded if they turned you in. With the kid behind you, they’d get double.

“Soap.” The sharpness in Ghost's voice brings you back to yourself and your brow furrows—you don't have soap in the bag. But apparently he's now talking to his friend because the man with the mohawk goes to see what he's looking at.

Whatever he sees now held in Ghost's hand makes him look at you sharply.

You trip back another step as Ghost gets in your face.

“Where did you get this?” he asks and it takes you a second to focus on what he's holding. It's an old patch, one made to be sewn onto clothes. There's a logo on it—a skull on top of a sword with wings on either side.

“It- a friend gave it to me” you manage.

“What friend?” Soap asks, moving around Ghost—the two men are now so close to you that you're backed fully into the corner. There's another soft noise behind you and both men glance down. Then, blessedly, they back off a bit.

“We’re not going to hurt you” Soap says, more quietly now. “What are your names?”

You hesitate but there's not much to stop you so you tell them your name.

“And this is Dot.” A pair of eyes peer around you for a second before hiding behind your leg again. Soap smiles at her before looking back at you. Ghost doesn't react at all, not that you'd be able to tell behind the mask.

“We asked you a question” he reminds you gruffly. “Who gave you this?”

“Why?” You ask tensely. “If you're thinking of turning us in anyway-”

“We might not,” Soap interrupts you and your heart stutters. He glances at Ghost again. “If you start talkin’.”

You know you have to, if there's any chance they'll spare you. It’s not much, but apparently you do have something to trade.

“His name was Kyle. I don't know his second name but people called him Gaz.” Not you—to you, he was always Kyle.

“Was?” Soap prompts.

“He worked in the centre we were in.” You look down. “He helped us get out, told us there was going to be a riot, and that we could use the distraction to get away. He was going to do the same.”

You're talking more quickly now.

“We were meant to meet him at a safe spot after but when we got there, the place was overrun.” Overrun with the dead goes without saying.

“Before it all went down, he gave me that patch and told me where to find him if we couldn't get to our meeting point.”

“And where was that?” Soap prompts.

But now you set your jaw, tilt your head up and look at them both, first Soap, then Ghost, staring into the only part of his face you can see—his eyes.

“Somewhere safe. Somewhere the three of us could be safe.”

You fold you arms, square your stance.

“But I'm not telling you anything else until you tell me what's in it for us.”

[fairytale-poll]

LOSER'S BRACKET ROUND 2! MATCH 1 OUT OF 4

Propaganda Under the Cut:

Little Red Riding Hooded Mercenary

General Propaganda:

come on just look at her shes so fucking cool

SHES SOOOOOOOO FUCKING COOOOLL ok so like. Lobotomy Corporation takes place in an SCP type facility where a bunch of abnormalities are living. She is one of them. She is a mostly undying humanoid creature that lives for the sole sake of hunting down the Big And Will Be Bad Wolf. She lives in your facility and will BREAK OUT of her containment if she feels that the wolf is near (or if too many people are dying). You can also hire her to assist you in taking down other abnormalities, and she's actually super good at it. And her outfit is just so sooo sick? She's so cool. Please play Lobotomy Corporation it goes on sale for like $7 every Steam Sale

She's red riding hood if red riding hood had a gun. Also she kisses women

Monster based on human subconscious aka an Abnormality based on the story of Little Red Riding Hood (duh). In this story, she was mauled by the wolf (Big And Might Be Bad Wolf) who is based on all fairy tale wolf villains. Little Red then got to work plotting her revenge and making Bloodborne-esque gear for herself and the two Abnos are locked in eternal combat of hatred for one another

She's literally the coolest, just look at her. For people who might not be so familiar with her: She's one of the abnormalities that remain locked in the Lobotomy Corporation. Her past is somewhat unclear, but she has some horrid scars on her face due to the Big Bad Wolf and she swore vengeance upon him because of that incident. This lead her to become a mercenary and she looks 1000% scarier and more badass than the wolf lol. Also, asides from the fact that she may kill half of your team if she escapes containment, she is quite chill and will even help you take care of your problems if you pay her.

little red riding hood but consumed by vengeance to the point of becoming an anomalous creature hellbent on completing her eternal battle with the wolf. intense desire for revenge. baller as fuck design. will help you kill other escaping abnormalities but you gotta pay her to do it. gets pissed off every time someone escapes containment except for that one annoying bird for absolutely no discernible reason. if you let her kill the wolf she gives you bonuses but if someone else kills the wolf she goes fucking bananas. truly an inspired feral creature of a woman.

Go girl!!! We love your unrestrained violence!

She is literally the absolute coolest!!! I mean, just look at her design! Everything about it screams fucking cool! Not to mention that her story has themes of vengeance, rage, and grief!!! And Lobotomy corporation is just the fucking best and soooooo underrated.

She's starting to fall behind so GO ON AND VOTE MERC WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR! (and buy Lobotomy Corp on steam it's not even that expensive!)

Vote for Riding Hooded Mercenary she's an Abnormality serving as a hired merc that means shes a hunter of her own kind and she WILL chase them to the ends of earth lest she dies herself or knows that damn Wolf is nearby. The cursor for sending hits on something is a wanted poster. She's WAW-classed too, a step below the most dangerous category for her ilk. she shares the class with things such as insane-ass magical girls, an eyeless flower horse turns people into wisteria gardens, fucked up and evil Little Prince, a bird judge that hangs its victims, the now-animate poisoned apple that killed Snow White, and of course the Wolf itself.

Loser's Bracket Propaganda:

little red wouldve gone so so hard if she wasnt against ylfa immediately… victory for our mercenary gal.

Riding Hooded Merc is a bonafide baddie & professional

She;s so fucking cool. almost got murdered by the wolf (also in lobcorp by the way) and she wants revenge so bad. cool as hell mercenary. also just look at her come on

I feel that they all deserve a bit more recognition as just about every Little Red Riding Hood is remembered for their story, but not their character. And I believe that the few I selected are truly well rounded characters, and amazing takes on who the character is.

the Lobotomy Corp one I know nothing about but who has a sick design (I also want the fans of this one to have a win because I liked watching the first round because of them)

Ruby Rose

General Propaganda:

She has a scythe that is also a high-impact sniper rifle.

She is literally just based on Red Riding Hood and she's such an amazing character holy heck

Red Riding Hood but with a gun. (Specifically a combination scythe/high-impact sniper rifle called Crescent Rose). Also she's gone through so much she deserves it. She's trying to save the world and keep going despite all the people she's lost. Grew up dreaming of being a hero who fights monsters. She knows life isn't a fairy tale and wants to make it better. Just went through a mental health arc where she had depression from trying to live up to her (presumed dead) mom and from her friend dying for the second time. Killed the Big Bad Wolf with her magic eye powers. Her sister is Goldilocks and her friends are Beauty and Snow White. also I love her &lt;3

She’s the little red riding hood but also a powerful fighter with a massive fucking scythe that is also a sniper rifle and she’s so skrunkly and so gender. Also RWBY’s whole thing (well one of them) is that their characters are all inspired by pre-existing ones from older stories and Ruby’s the main character so like, poster child of ‘character based off [insert relevant fairytale here]’ so I think she deserves to at least get pretty far

Aesthetics, themes, meta, personality and raw coolness.

She is the main character of her show. The most common monster they fight is a type of wolf (its been a while since ive seen it). Her job is to hunt them down before they can eat her. this story is very much about failed fairy tales, many of the side character's inspired arcs end in failure, but (having not seen the most recent bits) Ruby is still going strong, and i really like her cape, rose petals, and use of a scythe.

She is THE RRH character of all time. She has a scythe that's also a gun and she has to be the hero because she's got super rare main character powers. She is my happy girl. Also her mom was Sleeping Beauty and her sister is Goldilocks, and she fights to stop Rapunzel from destroying everything on the world, the gods, and then herself.

Ruby as a character is literally based on little red riding hood! She has a red cape with a hood

the Red trailer is better propaganda than I could ever write

She is a badass with a scythe, inspired by her uncle and fueled by her mother's death and her sense of righteousness

She has a giant scythe

Loser's Bracket Propaganda:

ruby rose makes me go :D so i picked her here <3 hope this helps

luv them

Ruby Rose is my blorbo in law and I need her in because of that

[selenacosmic]

Can i request the Azuchi warlords and Motonari reacting to MC running at them screaming about how there’s a spider in her room so the warlords go and investigate it, thinking it was a small spider but the thing was bigger than their hands.

The worst part? They blinked and the damn thing was GONE.

This is a fun one! Thank you for the request.

MC screams because of a spider in her room.

Oda forces.

Nobunaga Oda.

Hearing you scream made Nobunaga immediately rush to your room, he had his sword in hands and, if necessary, a gun. You quickly hid behind him and finally revealed what was it that scared you… imagine his disappointment when he learned it was just a spider.

Sighing, Nobunaga decided to help you, so he entered the room to get rid of this minor threat… until he saw that big spider on the wall, it was bigger than his hand. Without saying anything, Nobunaga will close the door and suggest that they burn the room.

Hideyoshi Toyotomi.

Hideyoshi is very quick to go help you, even if it’s just a spider. He will actually think you are adorable for being scared of such a small thing. Don’t worry, you can trust hideyoshi to help you! He will open the door and when he see that big spider… he will panic too.

Just how did a spider like that manage to enter the room?! From where did it come from? Well, he won’t give up on getting rid of the spider. That is, after getting in his armor of course.

Masamune Date.

He will think it’s very silly, why be scared of a spider? You can squash it by stepping on it. It can’t possibly be scarier than an assassin or a spy. That is until he opened the door, that thing is definitely too big to be stepped on. Still, he won’t be scared!

The fearless one eyed dragon will face this opponent for you! He will get ready with his two swords and fight this spider head on!

Mitsuhide Akechi.

Hoh? You are scared of a little spider? How amusing, even little mouses get scared of things that are smaller than them. Well, worry not, he will help you. Though the sight of running from your room while screaming was certainly amusing.

When he opens the door when smirking, he gets frozen into stone. Mitsuhide will close the door as slowly as possible while still smirking and will walk away with you. Let’s leave this to Hideyoshi to handle.

Ieyasu Tokugawa.

He will complain that his ears are hurting from your screams, just what is making you be this loud? He will get even more annoyed when you tell him it’s because of a spider in your room. He will open the door while complaining about how you shouldn’t overreact to these things…

… and then he will see that big spider. At this, Ieyasu will just leave. Not with you, he will leave on his own because he is not dealing with that thing.

Mitsunari Ishida.

Oh? Whatever could make you this alerted? Mitsunari will rush to your side and open the door. Even when you mentioned that it was a spider, he will think your startled reaction is reasonable. Once he sees the size though, he will see the situation is more complicated than it seems.

He will close the door and ask you to stay at his room, Mitsunari will search on his books for ways to deal with that big spider.

Keiji.

Keiji will be curious and go to help you. There is no way you would be that scared by a little spider, right? There are way scarier things to worry about, a spider can only bite you, at best. He will open the door while saying you are worrying over nothing… and then see that monstrosity.

How is a spider able to be that big? A bite from that thing could snap an arm! He will still deal with it… with his largest spear so that he is as distant as possible.

Ranmaru Mori.

Ranmaru will also be scared by that fact that we are dealing with a spider, though he will help you and prepare his Kunais to throw at the spider. That way he wouldn’t get close to it and would deal with the problem.

That is until he sees the size of the spider. A Kunai will definitely not help him that much, he screams with you away from the room.

Lone forces.

Motonari Mouri.

Another one who will get annoyed, just how can you be scared of a spider when he is next to you? He will still go to take a look at the spider, and when he sees the size… he will wonder if that think snuck into his ship during one of his travels.

He isn’t scared and will deal with it fast, with his gun. But he will genuinely wonder from where that spider came from.

[razorblade180]

Omen

It was dark, pitch black in fact. Well… not really. Orange light randomly tickled my eyes while fibers harassed my tongue every time I took a breath. Man was it stuffy in this. If only my hands weren’t tied behind my back.

“Hello? Can you please remove the sack? I’m already in the car.”

I waited for an answer but of course nobody wanted to speak! It’s not like I don’t feel their body heat or how the seat sinks in on both sides of me. I move my right leg forward and immediately tap something that moves away. Really? Another one.

“I know there’s at least three people who hear me. Speak now or endure beatboxing!”

……

Well, they asked for it.

“Pa pa tsss! Pa pa pa tss! Pa ta pa ta tss! Pa ta pa tss! Yo it’s-”

Before I knew it, my performance was cut short as someone yanked the bag off of my head. Honestly, they lasted longer than I thought. My eyes stung for a second thanks to the setting sun, but it wasn’t long before I saw a gruffy brute of a man in a black suit with a pretty nice brown beard. I don’t think he liked my performance.

I looked to my left and right to see more suits! Both pretty redheads in shades. The one on my left had short hair while the right had short hair and a softer jawline.

“Am I in the middle of a twin thing? That’s interesting.”

I stare back at the man who I just know has to be smiling somewhere on the inside. “Thank you for taking the bag off.”

“It goes back on if you keep yapping.”

“If you didn’t want a conversation then why didn’t you gag me? Who the ladies look down on you? What are you an uncle?”

He squinted at me in silence. Hell yeah; I definitely got it on the first try. Now that I look at him closely he does look older than them. Also…this car is nice. Not to mention long. This is the fanciest abduction ever.

“Is this a limo?”

“Wouldn’t you know? You’re an actress.”

“It’s called small talk.”

The man sat up straight and opened his suit jacket slightly so I noticed the gun. Clearly someone didn’t like small talk.

“Guns aren’t scary when they’re holstered. Most of the time anyway.” I look at the short haired woman. “You're very pretty by the way. How are you a thug instead of an actress?”

She didn’t even bother to look my way. Tragic. I turn the possible twin then hear a familiar click. The uncle decided to make the gun scarier.

“No more talking.”

It’s amazing how good suits don't equal experience. Frankly, it was concerning.

“Sir, if that’s actually loaded I recommend you remove the magazine. Second, you won’t shoot me because clearly someone paid you to steal me instead of murder.”

It got silent again. Both the ladies looked at their uncle and that seemed to smooth out his edges. He was nice enough to holster that bad boy of his.

“That definitely has rubber bullets, right?”

“Why would it?” Said the long-haired woman. “Do you really think nobody will notice you're gone or something?”

“Oh you can talk! Eh, they might notice eventually but I run off sometimes. It’s the afternoon, not the dead of night.”

The man grumbled, “Don’t entertain the target.”

Such a rude thing to say. “You know my name. It’s Serendipity Karuma. I know I’m an actress but this is overkill. Who hired you?”

“Why the hell would I tell you that?”

“Because I’m already caught? Speaking of which, the rope around my wrist burns. Would you humor me enough to untie them? I’m dainty.”

I bat my eyes for dramatic effect. Nobody resists floral pink eyes.

I’ve been keeping my cool so far but it’s become impossible to ignore the intoxicating smell coming from the brown bag near the man.

“You stole me before I got my late lunch. Is that a double in the bag?”

“Y-Yes…”

“Knew it! Look, if you give me a single bite I promise it won’t be huge and it will prove I’m trustworthy enough to untie me.”

“Those two things don’t add up.”

“They do when you suck at math.” I giggled at my own ridiculous joke, but I wasn’t alone. Pretty lady on my right snickered.

“Uh-Sorry.” She cleared her throat.

Fortune favored me for once and the uncle actually took out a fresh burger that rumbled my stomach like a dryer on max settings. He put it right in front of my face and I oh so gracious took a moderate bite.

“Mmmmm.”

Car food and kidnapping is such a good combo. Especially when the food is greasy the drive has the hymn of the tires on the road.

“Thank you kind sir. You all actually seem like decent people.”

“We are not untying you.”

Why are people so stubborn? It’s not like I’m tangibly a threat. Well…not physically. I could hear it again, the whispers that never truly leave me. The way my body tingles from head to toe while I felt a knot in my shoulder made me sigh as I put the pieces together. This part was never fun.

“May I ask one earnest and important question to you all? You don’t actually know who hired you to take me, do you? Was it a direct contact or through a third party?”

Maybe it was the sincerity of my voice but it got the girl to my left to speak.

“Third party.”

Good old uncle was about to yell at the girl but I nudged his foot.

“Hey, I don’t know why you three or thugs but I will match the price if you let me go right now.”

“Do you think we’re that dumb!?”

Okay, now I am getting annoyed. “No! I think your client doesn’t give a shit about you, or they would’ve told you not to have live ammo.”

“What?”

His eyes widened and I truly tell how little they mattered in this scheme. That’s when it hit me, maybe this was the scheme itself? The whispering grew dead silent to me while the sudden sound of horn blaring was heard by all. I didn’t bother to look for the source, nor could I afford to care. I’m not a nice enough person to let things simply happen as they’re supposed to. The moment the man turned his head to look out the window, I gritted my teeth and forced my right hand out of the rope; I didn’t waste a second stealing his gun before-

BOOM

The limo was struck from the left. The entire world began spinning as the car filled with screams. Not mind though. All I could do was clench my jaw, shut my eyes and hold the gun firmly. My finger never grazed the trigger and yet all the violent movements eventually led to a BANG!

Was it all instant? Did I black out? All I knew was when I opened my eyes I saw a man writhing pain as he clenched his shoulder. The weight of one of the twins felt crushing while the other became the platform I laid on. If only I was a tad faster. The man could only watch helplessly as I unloaded the gun and put on the busted glass window.

My head was still ringing. That was a far fall. “Did we fall off a bridge?”

Truthfully I had no idea why I was still trying to talk to the man. He currently had more important problems than my questions. I rolled my body forward, hitting the new floor of this sideway limousine. Hadn’t noticed this before but it has a sunroof. Had a sunroof that is. My arms reached up and pulled me towards it while my legs got their act together. It pays to do your own stunts.

“Wa-Wait…” the man groaned.

“No time for that. If you’re worried about the girls, I could feel them flinching. Just…”

Man, my head hurts. I touch the top gently and don’t feel anything warm or wet. That’s good at least. Can’t say the same about whoever is the driver. Bullets rarely have one target in my experience.

“Find the strength to get them through the roof. Whatever happens next will probably be better than now.”

I let my body fall through the opening and land in crisp, cool water. Too bad it wasn’t deep enough to cushion anything. Actually…that would be awful. I prefer this creek. Definitely this creek. My body finally allows me to stand and before long, I’m walking. Sure it hurts and I have a slight limp in my step but I’ve been through worse. Won’t be long before an ambulance arrives. It is afternoon after all. Those amateurs were lucky. Late night crimes don’t go too well.

“Time to go. This isn’t my kind of limelight anyway.”

I got far enough away for it to matter. Siren’s played behind me sooner rather than later. Hopefully those three find a different career path. At the very least, let them never bump into me again.

“I should really invest in a bodyguard somehow. Heh, as if that’ll work. Oh well… back to my trailer I guess.”

Life will forever have its ups and downs and all things considered, this was a humbling middle ground. That was until I felt my leg vibrate. Scroll isn’t broken. Today is a good day. I take it out and answer the obvious questions from my Director.

“WHERE ARE YOU!?”

“On a walk.”

“I hear sirens!”

“They aren’t for me.”

“Are they because of you?”

Gotta admit, he was very good at asking questions.

“In my defense, I was kidnapped.”

“YOU WERE WHAT!? I THOUGHT THAT WAS DONE WITH!?”

“It could be a random coincidence? Nobody knew anything, which is concerning for other reasons. It’s pretty gross when I consider the worst scenario.”

“Where are you? I’ll pick you up.”

“No offense but I’m tired of cars. I need the exercise anyway. See you at my trailer?”

“…Fine.”

“Oh! Can there be burgers waiting for me? I can even go for a kids meal.”

“Fine! But your toy is a med kit!”

He hung up abruptly. Jokes on him. That’s the toy I wanted. Hopefully it doesn’t ruin our film schedule. After all, I’ve never been to Menagerie. Something fun is bound to happen there.