#Vienna Pharaon

[wordsofwisdomandsoul]

[loveandthepsyche]

2025: RECEIVE 💫

[ardnasl]

Truth!

[hb-writes]

[usunezukoinezu]

‘‘...this path (rejection) can still lead you to inauthenticity. When you rebel, your behaviors are still motivated by the pain of the avoidance, control, shame, and intolerance you once endured.’’

- Vienna Pharaon

[bodyalive]

Illustration by Monica Garwood

* * * *

From The New York Times Well newsletter

By Carolyn Todd Feb. 9, 2024

Of the thousands of self-help books on the market, which ones are truly helpful? “It’s uncommon to find a self-help book that feels different,” said Vienna Pharaon, a marriage and family therapist in New York City.

But genuinely useful titles abound. The best of the genre invite reflection or offer practical tools to promote emotional, psychological or spiritual well-being. And there are some that therapists personally turn to or suggest to their patients.

“Almost every therapist I know has a whole list of self-help books to recommend,” said Daniel Tomasulo, a counseling psychologist and the academic director of the Spirituality Mind Body Institute at Teachers College, Columbia University.

When sorting through the self-help stacks, who better to help than mental health professionals? We asked seven to share their picks.

1. "The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World," by the Dalai Lama, Desmond Tutu with Douglas Abrams

How do we experience joy in the face of personal and collective suffering? The Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu spent five days reflecting on their own lives to answer that question, and they compiled their stories and guidance in this 2016 book.

“The Book of Joy” is an opportunity to learn from two spiritual leaders in an intimate, accessible way, said Sona Dimidjian, director of the Renée Crown Wellness Institute at the University of Colorado Boulder.

Through their dialogue, which is punctuated with laughter and tears, the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Tutu teach readers how to cultivate joy and work through difficulties like illness and despair. Dr. Dimidjian recommends the book to “anyone who is feeling overwhelmed by the realities of our world and daily life today,” she said.

2. "The Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living," by Russ Harris

This book, first published in 2007, teaches you to accept your negative thoughts and feelings as they arise, instead of resisting or being consumed by them — a refreshing approach known as acceptance and commitment therapy.

Diana Garcia, a South Florida-based therapist, says this easy-to-read primer made her “first fall in love” with ACT. She has clients use the book as a supplement to their sessions and recommends it to friends who are feeling stuck. It teaches you how to keep taking actions that move you in a positive direction regardless of how you’re feeling, she explained.

3. "Tattoos on the Heart: The Power of Boundless Compassion," by Gregory Boyle

Gregory Boyle is a Jesuit priest who founded Homeboy Industries, a rehabilitation and re-entry program for former gang members. His 2011 book is a collection of real, raw stories about people he worked with and the lessons we can all draw from their experiences.

“Each chapter reads like a Sunday sermon to be savored and meditated upon,” said Jacob Ham, director of the Center for Child Trauma and Resilience at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai. While faith is woven throughout the book, Dr. Ham recommends the title to anyone who feels “that their traumas and all the ways they’ve coped with them have left them broken and unredeemable.”

4. "The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity," by Julia Cameron

This 1992 workbook from Julia Cameron, a teacher and author, is a 12-week guide to recovering your sense of childlike creativity. And it’s not just for artists and writers, said Britt Frank, a trauma specialist in Kansas.

“Of all of the books I have ever used with clients, this one has the most staying power,” she said. “Because everyone is creative, and creativity is medicine.”

For years, Ms. Frank has returned to the book’s tools — like the “morning pages,” a stream-of-consciousness journaling practice. And she uses “The Artist’s Way” when treating clients with issues like depression and addiction. But skimmers beware, Ms. Frank cautioned: “It’s not a book you read. It’s a book you work.”

5. "Homecoming: Healing Trauma to Reclaim Your Authentic Self, by Thema Bryant

Thema Bryant is a trauma therapist, ordained minister and professor who offers a “distinctive lens on health, hope and healing trauma,” said Ayanna Abrams, a psychologist in Atlanta.

Drawing on her clinical work, spirituality and personal recovery from trauma, Dr. Bryant shares stories, reflections and exercises in this 2022 title. She helps people believe in their capacity to heal, Dr. Abrams explained. Dr. Bryant also avoids the “gimmicky, bypassing or vague” language that so many self-help books lean on, she added.

6. "The Power of Character Strengths: Appreciate and Ignite Your Positive Personality," by Ryan M. Niemiec and Robert E. McGrath

This 2019 guide helps people recognize, honor and nurture their brightest qualities, Dr. Tomasulo said. The idea of cultivating your “character strengths” comes from positive psychology, which centers on promoting well-being, he explained. “It’s about moving from focusing on ‘what’s wrong’ to ‘what’s strong.’”

People who lean into their character strengths tend to be happier, Dr. Tomasulo said. This book, he explained, is a good pick for “people who are doing OK, but want to have more joy and well-being in their life.”

[Follies of God]

[the-forest-library]

April 2023 Reads

The Thief - Megan Whalen Turner

The Queen of Attolia - Megan Whalen Turner

I Have Some Questions for You - Rebecca Makkai

Romantic Comedy - Curtis Sittenfeld 

The Do-Over - Lynn Painter

The Summer of Broken Rules - K.L. Walther

Never Vacation with Your Ex - Emily Wibberley

Every Summer After - Carley Fortune

Off the Map - Trish Doller

If Only You - Chloe Liese

For Her Consideration - Amy Spalding

Gigi, Listening - Chantel Guertin

Yours Truly - Abby Jimenez

While You Were Dreaming - Alisha Rai

Girl Forgotten - April Henry

A Long Stretch of Bad Days - Mindy McGinnis

Rules for Vanishing - Kate Alice Marshall

The Cats of Tanglewood Forest - Charles de Lint

The Leaf Thief - Alice Hemming

The Cool Bean - Jory John

Birdgirl - Mya-Rose Craig

Wilding - Isabella Tree

Laundry Love - Patric Richardson

It Goes So Fast - Mary Louise Kelly

Diary of a Misfit - Casey Parks

A Living Remedy - Nicole Chung

Not Funny - Jena Friedman

Emotional Labor - Rose Hackman

Life in Five Senses - Gretchen Rubin

The Origins of You - Vienna Pharaon

How Far the Light Reaches - Sabrina Imbler

America the Beautiful? - Blythe Roberson

I Swear: Politics is Messier Than My Minivan - Katie Porter

Bold = Highly Recommend Italics = Worth It Crossed out = Nope

Thoughts:

This was a really good reading month, but will stand in infamy as the month that my Queen’s Thief obsession started. I am so glad I finally got around to starting the series. Thank you to everyone that yelled about it. You were not wrong. 

Goodreads Goal: 135/400

2017 Reads | 2018 Reads | 2019 Reads | 2020 Reads | 2021 Reads|

2022 Reads | 2023 Reads

[positivitywithinme]

Healing happens when you’re triggered and you’re able to move through the pain, the pattern, and The story and walk your way to a different ending.

– Vienna Pharaon

[theloulouge]

Reminder Reflections 99

Behind every great relationship are difficult and uncomfortable conversations we rarely get to see. Great relationships don’t just fall into our laps. They require people to move through their fears and insecurities and do the hard work to move wounds into healing. – Vienna Pharaon

[moonlitfirefly]

“Change and transition are not meant to be easy. With every shift you make in your life, whether it's a relationship ending, a job change or city change, a friendship ending, new identities emerging, or loss, you will inevitably experience both grief and expansion. That's the thing about transitions. You will lose something, but if your eyes and heart are open, you will grow. Even through the hard stuff. You will grieve and you will grow. Make sure you hold space for both.”

— Vienna Pharaon

[ Art • “Kore & Persephone” by Anette Pirso ]

[pulsdmedia]

The Week Ahead 2/19-2/25

Whatever is happening in the real world, we’re here to inject some much needed revelry (and savings) into your NYC life. Be it the hottest sample sales, the most unique experiences, open bar shindigs, or delicious delights, pulsd is the place to be...

50% Off Tickets To A New York Times Critic's Pick Interactive Comedy Show

Grab the Juliet to your Romeo or LOL during a A Midsummer Night's Dream at the New York Times Critics' Pick live theatre performance of Drunk Shakespeare. For 90 minutes, a cast of 5 actors present scenes from Shakespeare’s plays with an improv flair. The catch: one of the actors will do five shots before they perform! Debauchery, merriment, and endless laughter will take place as Hamlet stumbles, giggles, and maybe even dances through his famed monologue - you will never know what to expect! To go, or not to go - there's no question! Drunk Shakespeare is guaranteed to be a live theater experience like none other...

Knickerbocker Sample Sale

Grounded in classic American style, Knickerbocker offers elevated basics that lay the perfect foundation for your wardrobe. Enhance your personal style by shopping at their New York sample sale event hosted by 260 Sample Sale's SoHo store. Shop knitwear, outerwear, and more at a fraction of the price!

Elsie Rooftop Great Elsie Prohibition Open Bar And Food Party NYC

Up, up, and away! Soar above the rest and step back in time to experience Great Gatsby vibes at Elsie Rooftop. Delight in this dazzling encounter no matter the weather (as the scene is enclosed & heated in the colder months), adoring the setting boasting velvet touches, a dramatic marble bar, lush greenery, glimmering candles and cozy banquettes.While you sip on endless Mint Juleps, Old Fashioned's, Gin Rickeys and the like, devour Thai Chicken Kabobs, Forest Mushroom Flatbread with Truffle Oil, Red Pepper Hummus & Phyllo Cups, and more, equally savoring sensational performances by Burlesque dancers, Acrobats, & flirty Flappers. Take in the stunning views of the city and the sparkling vibes - this is a Friday you won't soon forget...

The Origins of You by Vienna Pharaon

Pharaon’s approachable, mindful, holistic approach to therapy has earned her hundreds of thousands of followers on Instagram — and in The Origins of You she deepens her inquiry into how we emerge from the (inevitable) wounds of childhood into stronger, happier, more meaningful relationships in adulthood. Hear her discuss this fascinating, introspective new book through personal experiences, client stories, and tangible guidance for how to have difficult conversations and find a form of healing that endures.

$39: My Big Fat Italian Party; 2 Hour Premium Open Bar, Food & More

At Spritz New York, experience over-the-top revelry with a side of endless drinks, delicious Italian eats, and more at the spot's upcoming bash, My Big Fat Italian Party. Enjoy access to a 2 Hour Premium Open Bar, including Spritz's famous Aperol Spritzes, as well as a Selection of Delicious Italian Hors d’Oeuvres. Experience how summer is eternal at Spritz New York via vibrant, colorful interiors, all while you drink cocktails endlessly, balancing each libation with eats such as Fig & Fontina Triangles in decadent phyllo, Crab Cakes, Kobe-Beef Sliders and more. Sway to the sounds of a live DJ playing all the dance-worthy hits as you drink and dine at this effervescent NoMad, gem - andiamo!

Join TALEA for Against Your Better Judgement: A Singles Comedy Night

What’s better than meeting someone in a judgment-free environment? Meeting them in an environment dedicated to judgment. Join comedians Hanna Dicksinson and Kat Belinfante as they invite singles for an honest jurisdiction on what they’re putting out there: your dating app profile pictures, opening lines, prompts, and worst excuses for canceling. Plus, submit your dating profile for judgement and you’ll be entered to win prizes and giveaways!

[loveandthepsyche]

[abcnewspr]

HIGHLIGHTS FOR ABC NEWS’ ‘GOOD MORNING AMERICA,’ FEB. 20-25

The following report highlights the programming of ABC’s “Good Morning America” during the week of Feb. 20-25. “Good Morning America” is a two-hour, live program anchored by Robin Roberts, George Stephanopoulos and Michael Strahan, and Ginger Zee is the chief meteorologist. The morning news program airs MONDAY-FRIDAY (7:00-9:00 a.m. EST) on ABC.   

Highlights of the week include the following:  

Monday, Feb. 20 — NASCAR Daytona 500 winner; actor Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and XFL chairwoman Dany Garcia; actress Jane Lynch (“Party Down”); therapist and author Vienna Pharaon (“The Origins of You”); actor Jonathan Majors (“Creed III” and “Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania”)

Tuesday, Feb. 21 — Physician and author Mark Hyman (“Young Forever”); actor Michael B. Jordan (“Creed III”); “GMA” co-anchor Robin Roberts with “One Match, Second Chance”

Wednesday, Feb. 22 —ABC News chief medical correspondent Dr. Jennifer Ashton; nutritionist Rachel Beller; American Girl doll reveal

Thursday, Feb. 23 — Actress Tessa Thompson (“Creed III”); singers Denyce Graves, Kevin Webb and pianist Marvin Mills; co-authors poet Reginald Dwayne Betts and painter Titus Kaphar (“Redaction”); Deals and Steals with ABC e-commerce editor Tory Johnson  

Friday, Feb. 24 —Dermatologist Whitney Bowe; the cast of “The Banshees of Inisherin”; Corey Stoll (“Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania”)

Saturday, Feb. 25 – Football all-star Delvin Breaux; DJ Megan Ryte; Deals and Steals with ABC e-commerce editor Tory Johnson                                                                           

ABC Media Relations   Brooks Lancaster    Brooks.Lancaster@abc.com  

--ABC--

[conscious-love]

A relationship ending does not mean:

that you're a failure

that you're unlovable

that you're not good enough

that you're unworthy of being chosen

that love isn't for you

that you're a villain

that you gave up

that you didn't take your commitment seriously

Vienna Pharaon | @mindfulmft

[usunezukoinezu]

“When you can look a thing dead in the eye, acknowledge that it exists, call it exactly what it is, and decide what role it will take in your life then, my Beloved, you have taken the first step toward your freedom.”

- Iyanla Vanzant

[laineystein]

“Stop glorifying the idea that the right person will just know the way to love you; that they'll be able to just meet your emotional needs without you ever voicing them. Great relationships don't happen because two mind readers come together, they happen because people communicate clearly and directly. They happen because they're willing to teach another where their boundaries lie, and how they prefer to be loved. You know what else they do? They share fears and insecurities and let each other into their shadow parts. They reveal their wounding so triggers aren't such a surprise. They open their world up (past, present, and future) so that a partner isn't kept guessing and thinking "wait, what just happened?!" They share what connection feels like. They don't play games because they know the fastest way [there] actually is the straight, direct line. Of course it's healthy to expect a partner to be attuned. After some time together you might want them to know how you take your coffee, or what some straightforward preferences are. I'm all about that. But relationships do require us to come back to asking for needs to be met. Teaching people what lands and what doesn't. It doesn't mean that we shouldn't have healthy expectations of our partners. They ought to be attuned and hopefully be able to get some predictions correct. They ought to be pretty dialed in. But we teach and communicate over and over again because what we need actually can change. We meet parts of ourselves we didn't even know existed way deep into life. So, challenge the romanticizing that the right person will just know from the start mentality and open your experience up.”

- Vienna Pharoan