#VERY SOFF

[magicalberserk]

@poeticphoenix

Genesis will embrace and pet

Alma hugged back, no questions asked, eyes closed with a satisfied smile. Feels good, man. "You feel warm...". Good luck peeling her off, though.

[mblue-art]

drew @owl-bones's lv20 dust!cross boy, strike 💗 (pre-redesign) (new design here!)

silly xtras + simp thoughts under the cut

a shitpost ... ft silly au bc i got attached to how blorbo i made my sona in it...

im just a lil guye... against big scary tall skeleman constantly burning lots of magic... who easily crumbles to even the smallest bit of affection... he'll be dead on the fukcign gorund when im done w him /j/j/j/j/lh/aff <333

self-indulgent scenario/au surrounding my simping (just like all my other AUs in my head lololol) is called icecube (for now,, 👉👈),, yearned hard during an especially chilly rainy day, and felt so cold i joked that i was turning into ice-- then i got attacked with simp thoughts about how he'd be sooo warm and toasty (,,perfect for the weather,,,/)/////(\;;) and the silly thought of being the ice to his warmth-- his little icecube-- is very /////wwww

i love,, the visual of getting cold chilly hands and just reaching up to cup his cheeks and feel his ambient(?) magic warming my hands up and the whole gesture simultaneously making him melt,,

an icecube can only cool off a magic-burning body so much,, but i hope he enjoys the feeling lots everytime he holds cold lil me to his chest uwu 🧊💙❤️‍🔥

[fleetinglotus]

He would, tho

@dutybcrne

[tokuteasings]

OKAY this was coming a couple miles away from me, soooo how about some kissing HCs with the fashion croc himself, Gentoku? 👀 -Ryuki Friend

Took me like 70 fucking YEARS to complete it but fuck it. HERE. IT. ISSSSSS

Warnings: I miss Sawa so slapped it in here because I'm gay and I want more Sawa content. Also fuck it, slapping Kazumin in here. Other than that...nothing much? I hope you enjoy it my dear~! ;)))

Sidenote: thanks to @maou-the-tree for helping me think of ideas for kazuminmin

Himuro Gentoku:

Kissing Gentoku are a set of beard burns that honestly aren't as bad as you think they are. They're calming, scratchy, and burn in the best of ways. In fact, that's how kisses are with him. A burning whiskey being sent down into your body and the wonderful effects of alcohol making you float into the clouds but then be punted back down to earth into the awaiting hands of your croc of a lover. It's a goofy sort of grin to his lips, one you don't expect from him but you know it because it's...it's simply Himuro Gentoku.

Actually, he adores kisses. Sure he's busy a lot of the time and only has cheek kisses and lip pecks to spare whenever you two get to meet for only a brief second...but he adores every single little bit of it. Again, his dopey smile is on display and he def wants to merely admire you just a bit longer before he has to return to his unfortunate job of papers and headaches. "Just...just one more..." he would always beg, to you or to himself? No one is sure persay but he is a bit greedy. He almost seems like he'll swallow you whole...

It's sooo different when you two are alone though. Gentoku were calmly walk up to you (a pep in his step, a smile to his face, this vibration in his body that merely makes him want to sweep you into his arms and kiss your breath away) and pressing his lips to yours in this fashion that makes you simply melt. His arms wrapped around you and smiling into this kiss with passion ebbing and flowing into you; it's hidden behind a dam and he's carefully letting it trickle out to see you, to nourish you. But if you want to break that damn and let it be unleashed...well...that's another story. ;)

Gentoku is actually secretly pretty clingy but he's able to hide it rather well. There's hints of it whenever you two show affection to one another. His arm around your waist, his hand at the small of your back. But he actually cannot live without your kisses! It gives him energy throughout the day. So sure he may send you texts of how much he loves you and misses you, but giving him a kiss during work or in general makes him the happiest man alive.

Also since you two go out clothes shopping a lot, he loves it when you two grab each other by your clothing and kiss! It's the best way to shut up Gentoku and honestly, it's how he gets flustered the most. He stares for a moment but shrugs and goes back in for the next kiss. Sure yoou two kinda...uh...end up making out in the fitting room but it's fucking worth it.

Takigawa Sawa

Kissing with Sara is simply...a home. A place for her to rest her wings, her legs, her brain, her heart. It's coming home to a spouse you never knew you had but it makes you feel complete in a way that's like going on a honeymoon as newlyweds and never leaving that phase. It's sweet, adoring, and if she could, she would take a snapshot of this moment to forever display in her mind or in her phone. Her cheeks are always left flushed with adoring rose, picture perfect.

Speaking of the said photos, Sawa has definitely saved a picture of you two kissing to her phone. It's like her screensaver, lockscreen, homescreen, etc. It's various kissing pics of you two! She tends to longingly stare at these damn photos that everyone rolls their eyes and sometimes playfully gags. This earns a huff from you and her to be honest.

Sawa can limit herself on her kisses, in theory. She does need them to give her energy and it gives her suuuch a cute bounce in her step and a squeal from her lips. She's shining brighter than ever, happier than ever. There is a small (read: medium to high) chance that she may jump into your arms to give you kisses if you give her one. It's like, once you two kiss, you'll never stop. Sure sometimes she WILL get a bit pouty when she doesn't get them at regular intervals but...she'll live...probs.

Due to this, Sawa is hella not shy about public affection. Sometimes she does get a weeee bit blushywushy in this "Oh, you, darling~!" kinda way, playing coy before diving in for another kiss. But in general, Sara def loves giving kisses. It's almost a ritual when you two kiss, one in the morning to wake up, one before and after work, sending kisses via texts, or vids of one another blowing kisses, then kisses before bed, etc, etc. A routine.

Honestly, kissing Sawa leaves you both breathless. In a way that kinda says, "Idk when we'll see each other again but let's make every part count but also GOD you're so fucking CUTE lemme just kiss you" it's those two moods and there is no difference. This blurring of sensations into one another that makes it holy belong to the two of you and only the two of you...

Sawatari Kazumi

Kazumin's kisses are...not greasy icky (the Korean slang for this is like corny or cheesy) but passionate and sometimes a bit corny. Simply because his passion is far too much. It's burning, it's going to burn you but never harm you. It's whiskey sliding down the back of your throat and making you feel oh so airy. It doesn't matter if it burns on the way down because it's all you want. It's the feeling of getting drunk but also getting high and giddy. It's that euphoria...I think that's the best way to describe his kisses. Euphoria that starts off slow then bursts into flames. Maybe dips you while kissing idk, he probs would.

I HAVE to talk about the first kiss because Kazumi was so fucking nervous man. An outward monologue of sheer worry: "What if I mess up? What if they don't like it? Oh my God, I'm about to kiss the person of my dreams. Alright, Kazumin, get in fucking gear, you can do this. Take them by the collar of their shirt and just fucking kiss-" just kiss him to shut him up. Please. It's literally one of the best things in the world. Actually, always kiss him to shut him up. Listen he gets super flustered from this.

Kazumi does need the kisses semi-regularly, similar to Sawa. However, he will pout and make it much more audible that he wants your kisses. He's quite the dork so cheek kisses are a must for him. Forehead kisses too! He loves quick little pecks of affection because they can always turn into something more!!! Cheek kiss? Nose kiss? Bam! Suddenly he's kissing ya on the lips. Kazumi is predictable and yet not at the same time, and for him, it's so so easy to get lost in the kisses and the sheer idea of kissing you. It's addicting.

The Hokuto Trio are like, literally the biggest fucking hypemen. Which leads us into PDA, Kazumin wants it, a lot. Kazumi has like, some chill depending on the type of PDA. Holding hands? Perfect, it's fine. The trio are squealing and snapping pics, that's fine. But kisses? Oh, Kazumin is dying on the inside this is true but it won't mean he won't kiss back! He's fucking READY to kiss back spontaneously! Actually he does a lot of those kinds of kisses, surprises and what not. The trio tend to like squeal and be like: "YOU GET EM BOSS" please help them. Kazumi tells them to leave you alone but like, listen, they're ya fam now and they just!! want!!! you two to be happy!!!

To be honest, I think out of all of the kisses present in Kazumi's mind...chest kisses are one of his faves. It's the heart where his passion lies, where you lie. To kiss his chest right over his heart makes it stutter and scream because of course it would. Just for you and only you. Passion begins within the heart, curling up towards the brain and setting it alight. Fires that follow after a trail of gunpowder to just burst into fireworks that are meant to show off but sometimes they do and sometimes they only become simply embers to warm yourself up to. That's the thing about kissing him, loving him. Sawatari Kazumi is warm. Sometimes that warmth can burn others, but it's meant to be that bonfire that gathers people together, keeps them safe from the darkness and warms your soul. That is what you two are.

[moonlit-garden-sys]

Who the hell was the little boi yesterday???? Are you new or are you just now feeling safe???????? Are you okay? Where'd you go?

I'll wait for you as long as you need but I do look forward to you popping in again 🖤

-Thyst and whomever else is at front rn??

[dcwnrisen-aa]

❛ you’re lucky you got away with only a scratch. ❜ lbr , shaar would probably hiss a bit at wynter on her grouchy days and probably throw hands, so have caspian looking after wynter !

❝ ━ ah, no worries, i shouldn't have enroached into her space. ❞ wynter didn't always interact with the feline, more so out of fear. she never had pets growing up, so it was always so fascinating to attempt to interact with them when they belonged to someone else. and though she hadn't been successful today, wynter quite hopes they can get along somewhat. the woman winces as he cleans the cut, it's not big but man a cat's claws are nothing to trifle with. violet gaze slants toward shaar then to caspian with a curious moue but she wisely says nothing. ❝ ━ thank you for taking care of me. i feel like i'm causing a bit of trouble, ❞ she laughs, goodnaturedly, because shifting forward to kiss his cheek just as he finishes with her arm. ❝ ━ how long have you had her ? ❞

[randomshenaniganery]

Gaelan HCs plus character sheet

Gaelan looks basic and they color their hair to feel different. 

Not human they’re a child of a mountain deity. Doesn’t like sebek that much thinks he’s kind of annoying.

Has no opinion on Silver other than concern that people don’t seem to realize he has narcolepsy and thinks that maybe horse riding on his own is a bad idea but doesn’t say anything because they’ve only had one interaction and it was like bumping into each other and muttering sorry.

Thinks Lilia is the best thing ever, loves hanging out with them. 

Secretly believes that Malleus is a dork and has not had a single conversation with Malleus.

Gaelan doesn’t have a gender they’re a son of a deity from a culture that has no he/she pronouns and also they can change it to whatever they want to so there’s no point

can’t swim feels inadequate because of it

Lazy and uncompetitive, if people had an argument with them they’d go ‘yeah sure man you win’ and walk off to sing tunes to themselves with a flute on a tree 

One thing they study meticulously on is Justice and Morals since the very little we know about Kanlaon the deity is that it’s mentioned they were some kind of punisher of evil but that might be just because some cultures thought he was the head god or whatever. 

Maybe Gaelan wants to be a leader but also has no motivation or energy for it so they just think it might be something cool but is very unlikely to happen

hates the hat it keeps falling off despite the pins they use

totally doesn’t have a crush on the god of rainbows what makes u think that you dont know anything 

[centi-pedve]

today i– hello. today i went shopping and i found It. klepto's Dragon Plushie. in the wild. he was so soft and cute. klepto.......

omg.. pushie... he's so cuuuute want him now !!!

[acr3ss-the-cosmos]

Chenhua is very family oriented! She makes sure to visit her parents whenever she can, and she sometimes likes to spend her work breaks catching up with Yuhe, which is fairly easy to do since the Alchemy and Artisanship Commissions are right next to each other. Chenhua and her brother grew up in a very positive and nurturing household, and this is something that Chenhua hopes she can replicate in the future.

She does have a desire to start a family of her own someday, but only wants to have one with the right partner who wants the same -- someone who will live life with her and their future children, if they have any.

[agender-vampling]

🐁🐡 🐈‍⬛ for the age regressor ask game?

🐁- What would your ideal regression space/room be like?

I'm not entirely sure. I have a list of toys I want but other than that idk I could be anywhere and be fine I'm not picky. Usually when regressing I'm just sleepy so somewhere comfortable to lay down is all I really need.

But for the sake of the ask I'll share my Microsoft Powerpoint made moodboard of the ideal fantasy regression places I visit in my head

It's just a cabin in an eternally Autumn woods full of books and moss. My toys are my teddy bear patches (not pictured but the vibe of her is captured) and old keys I find and not much else. I like it, it's cozy and there's lot of exploring to be done!

Sometimes I like to imagine the owner of the cabin is a forest creature/monster of some kind and they take care of me.

🐡 - What is your favorite small activity?

I like being read to, and lining all my toys up in neat rows, and storytelling about my toys and stuffies backstories and lives and friendships and what not. Mostly read to though. I wanna lay down and listen to a spooky story.

🐈‍⬛ - What are your favorite nicknames?

No one's ever called me any nicknames so I'm not really sure... I'd have to hear someone else say them before I knew if I liked them or not. But that involves getting a CG who calls you things first...

I like the sound of Ragamuffin. Sounds very silly scrappy kid to me. And Vampling is a recent favorite!!

[satorubrain]

Hiiiii hope you are doing good(⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠)

This is my first time requesting, so i am sorry if I made a mistake jshdjdj

I wanted to request gojo's reaction(?) to a s/o that bites him out of nowhere 😭. Like nothing serious, its just a silly thing they do where they will randomly grab his hand and just *big chomp*

Thank you, have a nice day<333

Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Reader.

Tags: FLUFF. FLUFF. FLUFF. SILLY. Crack. Both are teacher sorcerers working at tokyo jujutsu high

Synopsis: As your relationship progresses and the more you open yourself to him, the more he is able to discover your silly little habits. He can't help but fall in love with you more.

A/N: BITING IS THE GREATEST LOVE LANGUAGE. ITS PEAK ROMANCE!!!!!!! I hope you don't mind me adding a few more elements to the story! Also anon don't worry you made no mistakes while requesting 💕💕

It had been two months since you started dating and Satoru couldn't help but fall for you harder and deeper. How can he not, especially when you were so cute. Whenever he thought he couldn't find something new about you, especially after knowing you for years, you somehow managed to surprise him with your quirks.

You had been staring at him, or rather his cheeks for a solid minute now, thinking intensely about something with your eyebrows furrowed. It was getting harder to resist. You've controlled yourself for years and now that he's your boyfriend, your brain forgot about it.

"Babe, you've been drilling a hole in my face, did something happen?" Satoru inquires.

"Your cheeks are so bitable Satoru." You answer. Before Satoru could respond he felt a soft chomp on his cheeks. It won't leave a mark but it was cute. He's sure his heart is going to jump out of his throat, you're way too adorable.

"soff" you mumble nomming on his cheek a bit before releasing it quickly after a few seconds and wiping it down giggling "well that was pretty satisf-"

He couldn't help but pull you into a deep kiss there and then, pulling you onto his lap, uncaring of anyone who might walk into the empty classroom. He soon breaks the kiss, cupping your cheeks.

"god y/n, you're driving me insane here" he whispers breathlessly, his mind numb and cheeks flushed red by your actions.

As time passes and your relationship finally gets public, your pda also increases.

He loves how you would greet him by running up to him, standing on your tippy toes, raising your arms to cup his cheeks and squishing them before pulling him down to give him a quick peck on his nose "G'morning cutie!!" you'd squeel and run away before he could react in return.

His heart flutters when he sees you open the door to the empty classroom he's sitting in, tapping every inch of his face for no reason before giving a peck on his nose, causing both of you to giggle.

He's calm and peaceful, his heart full of love when you hold him in your embrace, gently swaying you both, softly humming to a tone on the cold and dark nights when Satoru finds it hard to even breathe. But your warmth blows air into his lungs and your sweet sound calms down his senses. At this moment, for him, only the two of you exist.

"What are you doing, my sweet kirby?" Satoru asks with a stupid grin on his face as he lovingly looks at you who is making circles with your index fingers in front of him

"hmmm.... hypnotizing you" you chuckle, your eyes crinkling as you think of a reason for your actions "perhaps to make my fiancé fall for me even harder?"

"is that so? Well then I think it's working very well" he giggles as he pulls you closer to him by your hands, making them wrap around his neck as his cling around your waist.

The lovestruck man named Gojo Satoru didn't lie, since he did fell deeper in the bottomless abyss of your love every passing second.

ANONNNNN I HAD SO MUCH FUN WRITING THIS ILY FOR REQUESTING THIS <3

[REQUESTS ARE OPEN]

[MASTERLIST]

[lepusrufus]

Commission for @/guardian_talia who very kindly gave me one more reason to draw my fave soff lesbians

[mikufigureoftheday]

Some people in here are truly disgusting. Anyway, I've got a bunch of cute stuffed animals!

This is cowy. Here name is a bit silly because I got her when I was 10 days old, so I named her the moment I could speak.

This is Henry. He is the youngest plush I have.

This is lumi. I got lumi from Finland from my finnish grandparents, so her name is snow in finnish.

And last but not least, this is lily.

Hope my little friends made you a bit happy! (^∇^)

Cowy is a great name!!! It reminds me of my naming schemes too like an owl named "Hoot Hoot" or a dog named "Pup" lmao

I remember when everyone was losing their minds over that green frog and it was fair bc it's so cute 😭😭😭 very friend shaped

There's a common Finnish W I see, I have a friend who lives there so it's always good to see stuff coming from good old Lapland ♡´･ᴗ･`♡ and I love Lily's lil bows and dress.......she looks soff......

Very good friends I love them thanks for sharing ❤❤❤❤

[mblue-art]

Sorry for that question but I really curious!

What made you fell in love with Cross and Lust?

Tell us more!!

😳😳😳 hhuh what rreally,, , ,,, 😳 u wanna hear me yap abt my sillies, my beloveds,,, (i appreciate the enthusiasm tho omg 🥺🫶🫶🫶)

i want to have the yuris with lust and the yaois with cross I I MEAN HWHWAT 🧍‍♂️

UM.

haha anyWAY,, (oh gog this ended up long)

🍫—

cross checks so many boxes for me it makes me go insane. too good to be true. versatile(??)— like it's somehow way too easy to put him in Situations. (he's bf and husbone material??? just -20hp me now; that already kills me) he's. hh. gawddamn there's reasons why he won a utmv sans sexyman poll.

he's like a crush that you can't get out of your head no matter what you do, i'm so freaking down bad for him it's not even funny anymore. ever since simping for cross i have not been the same since. the man has changed me. the attraction/simp feelings hit me like a bat out of nowhere and i don't understand why it's so intense— i. hh.

,,i like when ppl make him dorky. stupidly silly (absolutely love shitpost shenanigans and would absolutely LOVE to get into silly shenanigans with him and with/without his bestie epic). fun to be around when he's deemed you as a good friend. stars, he'd give good hugs. strong, solid, and warm, the kind of hugs u don't wanna pull away from so soon. a little endearingly cringe. fanon simp cross is adorable and fun to mess around with. tsundere cross is adorable and fun to mess with. cute anxious guy under all that intimidating aloofness. when i say his smile is an absolute treasure, i mean that. his blush making him look like a grape or a glowing bulb is adorable and makes me wanna tease him more. anime protag/character vibes so strong i wanna have a cute bl/shoujo manga romance with him type shit yk.

then there's times when he's The Hot Dude and i think it's illegal if he's all confident and smug and dom actually (/hj) cause that makes me wanna fucking fite him HELLO? SIR? ILLEGAL????? (<- the fight or flight response of a tsundere towards a milder tsundere LOL).

-hp every single time. mf gets successful d20 rolls w/ rizz on me and i get a critical hit every time. it's a 50/50 either i fluster to death and become weak or i wanna fite his dumbass

i'll. i can fight him. i'll lose but i can fight him for sure. (why is he so cool⁉️‼️💢💢💢RRRRRRR)

he makes me feel things. lots of things. (mostly fluster but when i'm feelin sooper soff i jst wanna shower his skull in keeses. ima kissy lil guy)

tired cross makes me just wanna take care of him. want him to come home to me without any worry because he thinks i'm his safe space.

when he's being stubborn i want to tell him to chill out for a little while, take a break and watch some funny stuff while drinking choccy milk or eating his fav foods and be cozy. bapping him if he's gonna try to get out of this too soon. he's gonna get the free time he deserves n relax n get cuddles n kithes.

the way he can gently hold my hand and look at me with a sincere look in his eyelights and say something genuinely affectionate feels like cupid shooting an arrow through my soul, but also feels like a balm. (a promise of loyalty and faithfulness.) (a kiss on the forehead? a cherry on top.)

well now i can't be mean to him with all the nice he's saying and doing. i just want nice things for him o(-< (even if he's a bastard sometimes lol<3 all circles back to the silly) (silly is always important)

💜—

i love lust. so so so much. the fanon interpretation of him, anyway.

(don't get me wrong, i absolutely adore the feminine slay content of lust; but am i wrong for yearning for more masc lust content?)

i like my lust sans respectful, goofy, sans-like, an absolute sweetheart, and a caring, wonderful life partner. under the flirty personality and charm(ing looks), is a sans behavior that made me fall deeper. (he makes me feel very gender too) (ohmygofd yeah no he actually makes me think of gender sometimes rauauagrrgh<3/pos). i don't have to worry about showing my cring, weird side to him, because he's also a gremlin,, o(-< he doesn't have to present himself all nice and pretty all the time (although he's always pretty in my eyes). he can be comfortably himself; with me 🥺

i want to be his safe space.

i want to see him heal and be happy and be happy with me and give him all the love i can give and care for him and make him soso happy i just want him to feel SO sosososo loved, he deserves so much more

he's the only one who's able to get a certain reaction out of me; to pull flowers out of my heart. to pull out words of love and devotion and appreciation, heart bursting with affection only for him.

for him, i would try. i would live for him. i wish someone like him (the him i've created from interpretations and headcanons) was real irl.

i want to not care i don't care if he's a gorgeous well-known person that people fawn over, or if he's a campus crush, etc.,

i want him to think i'm worthy enough to keep in his life. for him to know how special he is to me, for him to know how much i want him in my life as much as i want him to keep me in his.

my immediate reaction when i think of him is: 😊💕💜💜💜eeeee kicks and giggles and flaps hands teehee

i love him so much i get a heart-on for him (/silly but it is true sometimes; love him so much it aches (in a good way))

[vivalas-vega]

match // new perspectives universe // jake 'hangman' seresin x reader

heyooo - i'm back from the dead - it's been a while since we've seen these two and for this one we're going back in time !! this is kind of a rewrite of something that’s already happened in the main chapters 🤭 i haven't written jake and jupiter in what feels like forever so this feels rusty to me lol but hopefully you enjoy!

match // new perspectives universe // jake 'hangman' seresin x reader

add yourself to my taglist

part of my new perspectives series !! it will make a lot more sense if you're caught up on these two:

prologue - one - two - three - four - five - six - seven - eight - nine

word count: 4.8k

warnings: language, mention of alcohol, college/med school/residency inaccuracies (I didn't go to college and it shows lol any and all knowledge on any of this comes from tiktok or greys anatomy)

Sitting at your vanity (if you could even call a plastic set of drawers with a handheld mirror duct taped to the back a vanity) you briefly thought to yourself that you should be excited… and you were, for the most part. Today was one of those days that marked the start of a new chapter. You’d been lucky (or unlucky, depending on how you looked at it) to have had a few of these already… first opening your acceptance letter into college, then med school, and now you were getting ready to find out where you had been matched for residency.

The excitement and nerves you were feeling were subdued because really the only thing you could focus on was the fact that the only person you wanted here wasn’t… and you didn’t know where he was. He could have been on a ship halfway across the world or at a base a handful of hours away but in the end it didn’t really matter much… he wasn’t here, and that was just part of the deal. You knew what this was long before it got to this point, and that point was only accentuated by the floppy haired boy walking into your dorm just as you stood from your spot in front of the window to change.

“Well, don’t you just look darling,” he teased and on another day you might have laughed… struck a pose and had a witty comeback, something about ratty college tees and soffe shorts being on all the runways these days, but it wasn’t another day. It was today and your future was hinging on something written in an envelope waiting for you across campus and this boy wasn’t the one you wanted teasing you today. 

You undressed and stood with your back to him, a silent request for him to help zip your dress and he obliged just as quietly. There was an expiration date on you and Matt, this much you knew… but the way his fingers trailed down your arm and the lingering question he’d been asking all month told you he wasn’t on the same page. He had a vision for his life, one that very much included you and perhaps you felt a little guilty for continuing to keep him in your orbit but the more logical part of you reminded you that the vision you had for your life had been set in stone long before he showed up. He saw residency right here in California, with you by his side. He saw you switching your area of focus to general medicine, something less demanding to create room for starting a family, something you’d do within the next few years. You hadn’t had the heart yet to tell him that sounded like your own personal hell.

Your vision was Boston, in a cutthroat surgical residency program before moving on to whatever hospital offered the best fellowship for your chosen specialty… that was the one area of your life you’d yet to nail down. Most of your peers pursuing the surgical route knew what they wanted to focus on, some vying for cardio or neuro, others trauma or general but not you. That was the one thing you were leaving up to fate, deciding to instead let yourself make that decision a few years into residency… and if that fellowship happened to come along where the boy you missed more than anything was stationed? Well, you wouldn’t be one to complain. The vision didn’t include Matt, it never did. 

And so, as you turned to face him with a tight smile you wanted more than anything to tell him this was over, that it would be best to head into residency as individuals but then you saw that look on his face and you couldn’t do it right now… not right before finding out whether or not you were getting everything you’d spent the last eight years working towards (seven for you, but you wouldn’t point that out to him anymore than you already had). You’d wait until after, even if that meant walking into the ceremony with someone you had already decided you wouldn’t be seeing after today. 

“Hey, did you guys get settled okay?” you asked your parents as you set your bag down on the table and exchanged quick hugs. You’d already seen them this morning when they’d arrived and they’d decided to give you a little space to get ready. 

“Your mother has taken photos of about a dozen things at the hotel, taking notes for our upcoming remodel which… I was just informed of this morning,” your dad said and you laughed. Matt said his hellos before going off to find his own parents and you rolled your eyes at the look your dad fixed you with. “He’s still around?”

“Oh hush,” you replied. Your purse started ringing and you fished around lip gloss and old flashcards to find your phone, immediately feeling more settled at the voice on the other end.

“Hey you,” Jake said and you actually let out a sigh of relief. “How are you feeling?”

“Oh me? You know, cool as a cucumber. Not freaking out at all,” you answered with a small laugh and he just chuckled.

“Of course not, not like there’s anything big going on today.”

“Definitely not, just a normal day around here,” you said.

“I just wanted to call and tell you to breathe, because you forget to do that sometimes-”

“I do not-”

“Yes you do, and to remind you that no matter where you end up you’re going to be just fine.” 

“Thank you,” you said softly. “I know you can’t say where you are but I hope you’re flying safe today,” you added.

“Always do, sweetheart. I’ll call you tonight, yeah?” 

“You better.” you said with a smile as you hung up and put your phone on silent just as the announcer gave the two minute warning. You could practically feel the rising tension in the room, a mix of nervous excitement and pure dread. So many fates contained within tiny envelopes and as you picked yours up you found the whole notion of this rather silly. You felt bad for anyone who got news they didn’t want today, having to find out in a room full of people celebrating and you prayed to a god you weren’t sure you even believed in you wouldn’t be one of them. 

“I think I’m going to, uh…” you started, looking at your parents and then back at the envelope in your hand. “I’m going to just take a minute and open it myself, if that’s okay?” you asked hesitantly and they nodded.

“Whatever you want, honey,” your mom replied and you turned around as the announcer told everyone to open them. You took a deep breath, because you did forget to breathe in times of stress, and with shaking hands practically ripped the envelope apart to pull out a folded piece of paper… a piece of paper that you hoped contained two specific words. 

Massachusetts General. 

Your shaking hands persisted as you read and reread what was right in front of you. Massachusetts General. You blinked and read again, did it really say that? Massachusetts General. 

“Oh my god-” you started as you turned around to show your parents with the paper facing outwards but they were gone. Really they’d only stepped a few feet to the side but they, and everyone else in the room, may as well have disappeared because all you could focus on was him, standing right there in front of you in his dress whites looking so proud as he read the words in your hands that quickly fell to the floor in shock. “Jake?” you asked so quietly, your mind still not catching up but it didn’t matter, in an instant you were launching yourself at him and he caught you with ease as you wrapped around him.

“Hey you,” he repeated his words from just a few minutes ago on the phone and you let out a sound that was mixed with a laugh and a sob as you clung to him. “You did it, I knew you would.”

“What the hell are you doing here?” you asked as you pulled away slightly to look down at him and he just beamed up at you.

“You didn’t really think I’d miss this, did you?” he replied and you just smiled, but it was quickly wiped away as you heard someone clear their throat behind you and you didn’t need to look to know who it was as you slid down Jake’s body to the floor and turned to see Matt, who was looking at the pair of you skeptically.

“Jake’s here,” he said, trying to muster some kind of enthusiasm but it fell flat, “yay.” You stifled a chuckle as you looked at him expectantly, “I matched here, what about you?” You knew what was coming as you took the paper your dad held out for you and Matt nodded softly when he read it. “I thought we talked about staying here for residency?” You didn’t miss the way Jake scoffed behind you, clearly disgusted that that was the first thing out of his mouth.

“You talked about it, Matt… I was always clear about my goals.” you said firmly. “But this is what we’ve both been working for. Congratulations, really,” you said, wrapping him in a tight but quick hug. “Go, celebrate with your family. I’ll see you at the party later.” you finished, nudging him off and  when you turned around Jake was giving you the most unimpressed look.

“Don’t even, I will not be seeing him at the party later, if you must know.” 

“Is that so?” he asked with a smirk and you rolled your eyes as he chuckled.

“Congratulations, sweetheart,” your mom said, pulling you in for a hug.

“We’re so proud of you,” your dad added, pressing a kiss to the top of your head and you went to respond, to thank them for everything they’ve done for you but they didn’t give you the chance. “Go celebrate and spend time together, and have fun at the party tonight.” 

“What? No, you guys flew all this way… I thought we could go out for dinner-”

“Hush, you two have some catching up to do,” your mom replied. “Besides, I think whatever celebrations you get up to tonight are best kept from us,” she added with a knowing smile and you tried to fight your own. 

“We’ll do breakfast, just the four of us like old times… but we won’t wake you too early,” your dad said and you watched as Jake gave them hugs before they slipped away. 

When they left he turned to look at you, all pride and adoration, and you flushed under his gaze as you gave him a look that said what? “You fucking did it, Jupiter.”

“I fucking did it,” you replied, your laughter bright and uncontrollable as he lifted you from the ground and spun you around.

“How’d he take it?” Jake asked as you entered your dorm, and you chuckled as you took him in, sprawled out across your bed, one leg hanging off the side because he simply didn’t fit. 

“About as well as could be expected,” you said and he laughed as he sat up.

“So… not well at all?” He laughed again when you nodded. “Tell me about this party we’re going to.”

“It’s pretty standard, I expect things will go as they always do with a campus party… just a little more celebratory with a slight drinking to numb the pain vibe from some.”

He nodded, “all your friends got what they were hoping for?” 

“For the most part… a few didn’t get exactly what they wanted but that’s kind of how it goes… matching is about a little bit of hard work and a shit ton of luck.”

“So, I’m guessing dress whites aren’t the vibe for tonight?” he asked, watching as you discarded your jewelry onto your desk and you chuckled as you turned and walked towards him, stopping in between his legs.

“Not at all,” you said with a shake of your head and you laughed again as he pouted and rested his hands on the backs of your thighs. “But they were a nice touch, you look very official and handsome,” you added on, hoping to turn his frown upside down.

And you did, he looked up at you with that same look he’d given you in the event hall. “I know you know this, but I really am so fucking proud of you, J,” he said and you softly smiled, feeling crimson creep onto your cheeks and you quickly diverted, trying to break some of the intimacy of the moment by pulling the hat from his head and plopping it on your own.

“Well, you should be, cowboy,” you said, stepping back and grabbing two beers from the mini fridge that doubled as a nightstand, handing one to him and he looked at you expectantly as you both cracked them open. “Because your best friend got into the fucking brig,” you said as you clinked the cans together and he let out a few cheers before taking a generous gulp. 

He stayed by your side as you got ready together, only engaging in a few quarrels due to the lack of space that only got smaller when your roommate Katie showed up, and you couldn’t help your amusement as the two of them got on each other's last nerves. Their relationship was very akin to that of siblings, they’d scream at each other through the phone on facetimes when the other was pulling too much of your attention and on the rare visits Jake managed she’d spend the whole trip pouting about how no one else existed when he was here.

“Are we not going to this party together, Katie?” you said, interrupting her latest spiel about Jake’s evilness, as she put it, and she held her hands up in surrender as you laughed. She put on a good show but you knew she liked having Jake around, it meant she got to see more of her favorite version of you… party Jupiter. And party Jupiter was in full effect as you strolled down the street lined with fraternity houses. The parties you attended these days were typically on the other side of campus and not quite as rowdy, you couldn’t even remember the last time you’d been down here but it had been negotiated that the frats held parties for the med students this year, to give you all one more truly college party before everyone went their separate ways into a new journey of adulthood. 

“You’ve been here before, right?” you asked Jake as you watched him mix you a drink and he nodded.

“Mmhm, your third year of undergrad,” he answered and you snorted.

“Oh god, yeah,” you briefly reminisced on that party, one with no cause, and the shocked look on Jake’s face most of the night. As it turned out, you had actually been understating just how much Stanford kids like to party that day on the phone all those years ago. You mingled with Jake in tow, socializing with friends you hadn’t seen since the beginning of the year to due rotations and interviews across the country, and really emphasizing the fact that you wouldn’t see each other for a number of years after tonight in your drunken states much to Jake’s amusement.

You weren’t much of an emotional drunk but that didn’t seem to be the case tonight… Probably something about the finality of it all, going from college to med school didn’t seem like a huge transition for you because you stayed in the same place, but this was different. After graduation next week you’d be packing up and moving across the country, to somewhere that couldn’t be more different than where you were, and you would officially be a doctor. 

Jake watched as you let loose, cackling with friends about professors or that one time you stole a dozen mice because you couldn’t bear the thought of them being used for research (and you maintained that you’d been in the right each time it was brought up). The last time he’d come to visit you’d been so entrenched in your coursework he actually became worried, watching you study for hours on end from your bed as he realized this is what your life was. You’d always done a good job at completing everything before he arrived so you could focus on the fun but that visit just wasn’t the case… There were exams to prep for and applications to be sent out and interviews to be scheduled, and all he could do was half-heartedly read a book he’d plucked from your shelf about internal medicine and force you to come up for air every now and again.

But this time was completely different, there was nothing to worry about because you were done. You’d gotten to the end of your journey here at Stanford and were in that blissful reprieve period where there truly was nothing to fret over, and it simultaneously warmed Jake’s heart and broke it to see. On one hand, you were finally getting a true break after years of achingly hard work… but on the other that break would only last a few days before you went into a tizzy packing to move cross country and start your residency. He knew you were happy, and that you would be happy in Boston but he also knew things were only about to get harder, and that a few days of true relief weren’t enough.

Granted, this wasn’t how you felt, despite the fact that as you downed your drink and chatted with Katie about her upcoming move to Nashville you had no idea this was going through his head… you felt nothing but joy knowing that you got to spend the next few days with Jake before diving into your future. Residency is what you feel you’d waited your whole life for. You did the hard stuff, you laid the foundation and stuffed your nose in a book for years and now you were finally going to be able to do. 

“I think I might actually miss these parties,” you said as you sat down by the edge of the pool with a sigh, unclasping your heels and actually moaning in relief as you dipped your feet into the cool water and Jake chuckled beside you. 

“I find that shocking considering that after that one your third year you said you never wanted to set foot on this block again.”

“I’ve grown, things have changed,” you protested which coaxed another laugh from him. “God, I can’t believe I’m leaving this place soon. It almost feels like just yesterday I showed up here with nothing but a suitcase and a dream. And you! Mr. Top Gun graduate,” you added, nudging him playfully.

“Don’t let Coyote hear you, he’ll bust my chops even more than he already has.”

“I miss Coyote,” you said, leaning your head on his shoulder. “Are you going home for Christmas this year?” you asked and this took him slightly by surprise, considering it was spring and he didn’t expect you to be looking forward to anything other than residency.

“I don’t think so… the way it lines up I’d have to fly in on Christmas Eve and leave the day after… I think the short trips make my mom sadder than me not going home at all.”

“They do,” you said. “For my parents too. I don’t know why but they do. What do you think about me coming to you this year? If you’re on base.”

“I think that sounds perfect,” he replied, turning to press a kiss on the top of your head. “I’m sorry I can’t stay for graduation,” he said and you lifted your head to shake it, waving your hand dismissively.

“Truthfully I don’t care about graduation, it’s more for my parents and yours. This was the important one,” you replied, giving him a warm smile. “I still can’t believe you pulled off surprising me. How long have you known you’d be able to make it?”

“Since you first told me the day,” he answered and your eyes widened as you hit his chest.

“You asshole! You made me think you couldn’t come and this was your plan all along? I was really sad, you know.”

He let out a loud laugh, “yeah, I know. But it was worth it! The look on your face was priceless.”

“You’re unbelievable,” you muttered.

“Had to get you back for my tap out ceremony somehow,” he pointed out and you sighed, because he did have a point.

“That’s fair. Though, I could argue that it was a surprise for me as well, mine was not premeditated.” 

“To-mato to-mato,” he replied. “So, when do you make the big move?” 

“Well, tomorrow you’ll be helping me scout apartments, tough part is I’ll have to pick a place sight unseen so we’re going to have to be very thorough in our search and then hopefully I’ll be out there within three weeks… My program starts in four.”

“Unless a last minute deployment pops up, I think I can meet you out there… help you get settled and all that.”

“Really?” you asked, eyes wide and full of hope as you beamed up at him and he chuckled, knowing you were definitely drunk right now. “Seeing you twice in one month? I don’t think we’ve gotten that lucky since we were teenagers.” 

“Well, I don’t know about that,” he said with a suggestive raise of his eyebrows and you were startled by your own laugh, not expecting the turn in conversation. 

“That’s right, forgot I was talking to Hangman, eternal stud.” you joked. Briefly you thought joking about it should sting, and deep down maybe it did a little, but this was the first time it’s come up and the sting wasn’t the first thing you noticed.

“You haven’t done so bad for yourself either,” he said and you just gave him a deadpan glare.

“Really? You think Matt was making me feel lucky every time?” you asked and he went through the same range of emotions. He thought it should hurt, and it did somewhere deep down, but it wasn’t the first thing he noticed.

“He wasn’t? Then what was the point?” he exclaimed and you hid your face in embarrassment. 

“Oh, I don’t know! Truthfully it spiraled and I didn’t have time for anything else so…” you trailed off before letting out a groan. “Oh god, I’m a terrible person.”

“Now, how did we end up there?” he asked, brows furrowing in confusion at your statement.

“I knew all along I’d dump him right about now, how awful to not do it so much sooner.”

He shrugged, “maybe… but knowing you he did get lucky every time so don’t feel too bad. Broken heart or not he reached the mountaintop, good for him.”

“That’s a better, if not slightly twisted, way of looking at things.” you mused, resting your head on his shoulder again.

“Tired?” he asked and you nodded. “Don’t quite have the stamina of an undergrad anymore?”

“Shut up,” you said. “It’s been an emotional day.” 

“Wanna go home?” he asked and you nodded, allowing yourself to be pulled up and you awkwardly shook your leg over the pool to rid yourself of excess water, to which he just shook his head in amusement. 

You spent the walk back towards your dorm lost in conversation, giggling about nothing in particular and squealing when he picked you up and tossed you over his shoulder, “Jake! I’m too drunk, don’t make me hurl,” you laughed but he didn’t seem to care, carrying you like it was nothing until suddenly you were on the move again, sliding down to the ground with Jake’s firm hands on your waist to guide you. Your brows furrowed in confusion when you noticed you weren’t at your dorm but instead in front of a shiny car.

“I love Katie,” he started, but was cut off by the questioning look you gave him, “really, I do, but you didn’t really think I was crashing in your dorm, did you?” he asked and he did have a point… the last time he visited she was on rotation so he crammed himself onto her tiny bed and complained all the next day… there simply wasn’t anywhere for him to be this time around. “I have a hotel room a few blocks away, do you want to come stay with me? Or I can walk you back to your room,” he added the last part a little hurriedly and you chuckled, you thought you just caught a glimpse of a younger Jake… nervous and not wanting to overstep. 

“Are you kidding me?” you asked, gesturing towards the door and he was quick to open it for you, “a night away from that thing they call a bed sounds like heaven.”

“And here I thought you just wanted to spend more time with me,” he said after walking around and getting in the driver’s side.

“Well, that’s certainly part of it… just not the main part,” you teased and he shook his head as he navigated towards his hotel and you looked over at him in amusement when you entered the parking lot. “Very fancy, Mr. Seresin,” you said as he opened the door for you and he extended his hand which you gladly took.

“Shut up and come on,” he replied and you did as you were told. Following him through the hotel and to the elevator, where they opened to reveal a cozy and beautifully decorated rooftop bar and you just looked over at him, eyes wide and questioning. “Tonight was a goodbye to your college life, and I thought what better way to end it than here, welcoming in this next chapter?”

“Jake…” you started, the lingering alcohol in your system still present enough to have you feeling a little more emotional than usual. You sat at a cozy loveseat positioned in front of a firepit and thanked the waiter when he brought over your cocktails, gin and tonic for you and something whiskey based for Jake. 

“To you, Jupiter. You’ve worked so hard the past seven years, and you never once wavered when things got hard. You are nothing short of incredible, and being here with you right now, marking this occasion… it means a lot to me, and I’ll never stop being proud of you.” he said, and you felt your eyes well with tears that mirrored his own.

“Stop, you can’t cause then I’ll really lose it,” you warned, laughing softly as you wiped your cheeks. “Thank you… not just for saying that but for being you, and for being here. I was a wreck all morning and then I turned around and saw you and everything felt… settled. You being here means more than you know.” you said and you clinked your glasses together before taking a sip. “I’m really proud of us.” you said added a few moments of silence. “Do you remember the day we decided to break up?”

“Vividly,” he chuckled and you couldn’t help but laugh too.

“God, we were so young, with such big dreams… and going into it all so devastated… I wish we could go back and tell them it wouldn’t be for nothing, that we made it.” 

“We did make it didn’t we?” he asked and you nodded, a smile creeping onto your face. He reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and you didn’t know if it was the weighty realization that seven years ago you broke each other’s hearts to pursue the dreams you’d just achieved or the alcohol or just the fact that you simply wanted to but you leaned forward and let your lips brush against his. Soft and questioning but he pressed forward and captured you in a searing kiss. Years of pent up emotion and love spilling out, and you smiled when he chased your lips as you pulled away. 

You didn’t need to say anything, didn’t need to acknowledge any of it. You both knew it didn’t change anything, you both might have made it but only to the next stepping stone… it still wasn’t the time. You kissed him once more before scooting closer and resting your head on his shoulder, his arm wrapping around your waist as you just enjoyed the moment for what it was. A celebration of what was to come.

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[thewideawakechronicles]

*very slowly approaches Noah* m-must..pet..eaars

His ears are very soff