#Total Pest Control

[iristial]

Gavv's toku alumni line-up for its first episode

Haru Takagi has portrayed younger versions of two main Riders: Shouma and Sougo Tokiwa (for the Over Quartzer movie)

After being Haruka Ogami in Saber, Arisa Nakajima's starting her second stint as a mother - this time as Shouma's missing mother Michiro Inoue

Finally, for a series featuring PG-rated cannibals, they got an(other) Amazons actor! Toshimasa Komatsu used to be Shogo Kano, the Nozama Pharmacy secretary; now he's Hanto's journalist shishou

[exhaslo]

Over-Time Ch2

(CEO!Miguel x Shy/Clumsy!Reader)

Ch1

Warning: MINORS DNI, eventual smut, slow-burn, mentions of sex, bullying, cussing, fluff

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A soothing hot tea was just the thing to calm the nerves. All of your worries melted away with each sip. The amount of drink options that were offered for interviews was quite impressive. That's a rich company for sure.

Plus, the music was very relaxing. You had started to wonder about the perks of working here that the website didn't tell you. All you had to do was keep calm and do well during this interview. You had pracited for hours in the mirror.

You could handle a one on one interview!

Reviewing common interview questions, you noticed more people arrive on the floor. Each took a seat away from you, looking around in awe. In total, including you, there were six people. Not a lot for how big his company was.

"Alright. Everyone is here, please follow me to the interview room." A woman with incredible fashion said.

Your eyes widen in shock as everyone got up and followed her. You were last, feeling your nerves kick in. Arriving at the large room, you felt your fears sink in.

This was a group interview.

You were not getting this job. You couldn't do group interviews. It was hard to speak up and you often got over shadowed by other people. Your stomach was twisting as the urge to puke was starting to form. This was horrible.

But you had to be brave!

"Alright. I'm Lyla, normally I won't be conducting the interview, but there was a last minute emergency so you are stuck with me. Shame for the lot of you honestly." Lyla spoke.

You sat near the back since the others took the closer seats. Trying to control your breathing, you focused on the painting behind Lyla. It was a beautiful water color portrait of a foggy forest after a rainstorm. It was quite pleasant.

"I've read your files. I want your names and why you think you deserve to work here." Lyla said harshly.

You were practicing what you were going to say as everyone went their turn. You were going to be the fourth person speaking. All you had to do was say your name and why you would fit in at Alchemax. That was it. Easy.

"Next."

"H-Hello. I-I'm-"

"My name is Phillip. I believe-"

You tuned the man out, shocked that he cut you. Rolling your lips inward, you tried your best not to cry as you just repeated what you were going to say in your head. It was always like this. You needed to be louder. You needed to stop being shy.

----------

Miguel rested his head against the palm of his hand as he watched Lyla run the group interview. His focus turned to you since it was your turn to speak. It was cute how he noticed you count the people ahead of you and started muttering to yourself.

"H-Hello. I-I'm-"

"My name is Phillip. I believe-"

Miguel scoffed in disgust towards the man. Yes, your voice was low, but you were still speaking. Miguel hated it when people were interrupted. No matter, Miguel had to just stay quiet and let Lyla run this interview.

It was rough. You were being spoken over and interrupted at any given chance. Miguel wanted to see what you were capable of. You sounded so sure of yourself in the elevator. Hell, even shy people need to be given a fair chance.

"Lyla, leave the room for a moment. I want to see something."

-------

Lyla pressed against her earbud, listening to someone from what it seems. You were sunk in your seat, glancing at her.

"Understood." She sighed and released her earbud, "I shall return in a moment. There is a minor set back I must resolve."

With that, Lyla left the room. You gulped since everyone now had their attention towards you. Like wolves glaring down at their prey. You could feel your heart beat in your throat.

"Best if you leave now."

"No, no. She's making us look good."

"She's useless. How she got this far is beyond me."

"A pest if you ask me."

Unable to hold back your tears, you were quick to grab your paperwork. One of the other interviewers quickly forced you back into your seat.

"If you leave, it will look like we bullied you. Just shut up and stay seated. Okay?"

You were hesitant to answer.

"Are you fucking stupid? Do you understand?"

Nodding violently, you quickly wiped your tears. Their grip was harsh against your shoulder. All you wanted to do was leave. Leave and cry. This was horrible. What made you think you had a chance at such a fancy company?

"(Y/N), follow me." Lyla said as she entered the room for a moment.

You were quick to grab your things and leave. Lyla had you follow her to a separate room on the floor. Upon entering, you gasped softly as Miguel sat at a small desk, welcoming you in.

--------

Miguel resisted a chuckle as he watched your face light up to a familiar friendly face. He motioned you to sit and offered some water to calm you down. Once you had relaxed a bit, Miguel took a seat back at the desk.

"I should have warned you that it was a group interview." Miguel started. You sipped the water,

"N-No, it's fine. Um...I probably...should have prepared better," You muttered.

Miguel just smiled towards you. You glanced up, making eye contact and gasped. Your cheeks were turning red as you accidently dropped the water.

"Ah! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

"It's okay," Miguel grabbed your hand, helping you back into the seat. He grabbed the bottle of water and placed it on the desk, "I'm sure you're still shaken up. You can relax here."

"Thank you....T-To be honest, I...I am a little clumsy too...Especially when my...nerves kick in."

"And that's alright. I want Alchemax to be a comfortable place for my-uh, our employees." Miguel cleared his throat.

Who knows how nervous you would get if you found out that he was the CEO. Your face might turn into a tomato at that rate. Miguel wanted to keep you in the dark just a little bit longer. It was refreshing to speak with someone who didn't know his identity.

"Here. I want you to organize this list of meetings for me during a one week schedule."

Miguel handed you two pieces of paper. He sat at the desk, watching you work as you read everything carefully. This was the first schedule that Lyla ever had to work with and it stressed her out trying to fit everything together.

"Done."

Miguel raised his head in surprise as you finished in a matter of minutes. Looking over the schedule you had made, Miguel was surprised. You had managed to work everything out and even give Miguel more time than Lyla did.

"Impressive." Miguel whispered, "Mind if I give you a few more tests?"

"I don't," You whispered calmly.

The next half hour consisted of you working on Miguel's meeting schedules with shareholders, business partners, etc. He role played some phone calls with you and everything else that Lyla would normally do for him.

Despite your shy personality and clumsy nature, you were perfect for the job.

"I must say (Y/N), I'm impressed." Miguel said with a smile as he grabbed your hand, "Be sure to expect a call from us soon. Allow me to walk you to the door."

Miguel watched as your cheeks started to fluster. You stayed quiet while smiling. Honestly, having you work under him would be a treat. It was going to be nice having someone so cute and shy working right under him.

"Um, thank you, Miguel....For giving me a chance," You whispered, stopping in front of the elevator. Miguel just chuckled lowly,

"No, thank you, (Y/N)."

Waving goodbye towards you, Miguel waited for the elevator to close before frowning. He stomped his way over to the interview room where Lyla and the five fools were. Slamming the door open, Miguel gave them all a glare.

"All of you, out. I don't want a single pathetic lot of you ever stepping near this building again."

"Wow, harsh much." Lyla teased as the interviewees nearly begged for a chance.

"I have who I want as your replacement."

"Oh? Don't sound too excited now," Lyla chuckled. Once everyone left, she glanced at Miguel, "That good?"

"Don't be jealous if I say she is better than you."

"Ohhh, ouch. That hurt," Lyla laughed and nudged Miguel's shoulder, "I can't wait to train her."

--------

You were biting your lower lip as you smiled from ear to ear. You weren't sure how, but Miguel was your saving grace. You couldn't wait to get a call from Alchemax now. Recalling the warmth of his hand against yours, you nearly squealed.

"Hopefully I get to work with him~"

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Next Chapter

@timidquindim @decentsoupperson @ivkygirly @@reader-1290 @daddyfroglegs @eepybunny0805 @ddreabea @iamperson12280 @migueloharasoulmate @tojishugetiddies @koko-1025 @hyeinwluv85s @daisy-artfield @migueloharastruelove @a-lil-whore @hcqwxrtss123 @the-pan-liquid @tojisfav @pochapo @bubblegumfanfictions @brighterthanlonelythoughts @ghstypaint @mangoslushcrush @synamonthy @scaleniusrm @moonspectorx @dorck26 @a060403 @lunablackcosplay @soraya-daydreams @lovefanfic1 @mymrsweirdnessshipperstuff-blog @pretty-pink-princesss @corpsebridenightamare @razertail18 @gachagator @droolingmuttt @miguelsfavwife @ryzguy06 @raideaters-blog @manishkaworld @keidilla

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM LIFE IS STRANGE, SEASON 1 *  assorted dialogue, suggested by ismelodrama, adjust as necessary

everything is a picture waiting for be taken.

you're just jealous of me because i actually do the things you can't.

are you hiding something?

i'm sick of your disrespect. tell me the truth!

i don't want to fight with you anymore. i don't want to fight with anyone anymore.

i was eating those beans!

how the hell did you know about that photo?

always take the shot. my number one rule of photography.

you just don't listen, do you?

there's something weird going on with you.

you've only been here for three weeks and you're already causing conflict.

after this week, you are certainly not a little kid anymore.

not now. i'm contemplating shit.

are you fucking kidding me? this is major bullshit!

i didn't have all the evidence at the time.

we all make decisions we regret.

i'm not gonna make any excuses for my behavior.

i'd put stephen hawking against picasso any day.

it sucks to be dragged into the spotlight.

nobody believes me anyway.

you're exactly the kind of soldier i'd want by my side in a war.

why the hell not?

i almost asked you to hang out.

you should have asked me.

maybe we're too much alike.

i don't believe anything you say. you're full of shit.

eat a dick, [name].

i'll be in the tardis getting my delorean ready.

since you're the mysterious superhero... i'll be your faithful chauffeur and companion.

you don't know who the fuck i am or who you're messing around with.

where'd you get that? what are you doing? come on, put that thing down!

don't ever tell me what to do! i'm so sick of people trying to control me!

so you can't help me?

i told you before that i'll always believe you.

i may be a pest but... i'm a good listener.

you're the bravest person i've ever known.

for every action, there's a reaction.

i'm trying. but you have to understand my position.

i know i can be a pain in the ass... and you've always treated me like a person, not a beta nerd.

why do you want all your friends to die?

oh i see. i'm not important to you anymore.

nobody lectures me. everybody tries though.

do not analyze me! i pay people for that.

hey, that's total slander!

you don't know shit about my father, or me.

you're all fucked!

everybody hates me.

[name]... it's me. i just wanted to say i'm sorry.

i truly am sorry for being such a bastard.

you would have been cool to hang out with.

you might as well choose me.

i'm not perfect, okay?

you have talent, [name].

you don't have to push people out of your way.

thanks for admitting again that i have some talent.

do you think it's, like, fate we're not supposed to be friends?

nobody says we have to be friends.

everybody lies. no exceptions.

i came for all of you.

i'm in a nightmare and i can't wake up.

no wonder they call it a "web." nothing can ever get out.

i wish i could go back in time and erase everything.

just tell me you do have the photograph.

now shut up and listen.

i'm not a real scientist.

i was just happy just being your friend.

[name], i'm so sorry you had to go through all that.

i don't think i can concentrate on going out to the movies.

everybody pretends to care until they don't.

even angels need angels, [name].

i might be naive, but i feel their struggle.

why did you stop me from jumping?

this shit pit has taken everyone i've ever loved.

when a door closes, a window opens... or something like that.

i keep going back in time.

how could there be a more important moment in history?

thank you for trusting me.

hey... be careful out there.

what kind of friend are you?

you never understood me, or what happened to me.

i'll always be alone, thanks to you.

just in case we don't get out of this...

i'm going to make the right choices from now on.

i've been feeling like this might be actually the end of the world.

i hate to say that i'm glad to see you, but i'm glad to see you.

i wish i could stay in this moment forever... but then it wouldn't be a moment.

if that tornado came right now, i would just sit here and watch for a while.

i just feel like escaping.

i have total faith that you'll do the right thing when the time comes.

with great power comes great bullshit.

am i pushing myself too hard?

you like to hurt people, huh?

i'm glad you decided to escort me.

i know this is a bad time, but can i get one picture?

of course i believe you. you're the most amazing person i've ever met, and i'm glad you trust me.

i don't have a fucking clue what's going on.

[flowerishness]

Cirsium vulgare (bull thistle, spear thistle, common thistle, cotton thistle)

When most people hear the word thistle, they think of the Scotch thistle (Onopordum acanthium) but there are 16 genera of thistles in the daisy/sunflower family Asteraceae alone. One of these genera, Cirsium, has at least 200 species with about sixty of them native to North America. Native thistles are beneficial to the environment but they are easily out-competed by invasive species. Just to be confusing, Scotch thistle grows throughout Europe and western Asia but it is not native to the British Isles. It's actually this species, Cirsium vulgare, that is Scotland's national flower.

We call this a bull thistle where I live but, like the Scotch thistle, it's a major agricultural pest. This scrawny specimen is growing in a crack in the sidewalk but it really doesn't do a healthy bull thistle justice. This species gets a lot bigger, with multiple arms and very prickly leaves. No grazing animal will eat it and it can completely take over a fallow field in a couple of years. Noxious weed control companies say serious bull thistle infestations can't be totally eradicated, only controlled. They recommend herbicides and yearly deep-plowing, so that (hopefully) it only grows on the margin of a field. I understand the farmer's point of view but, you must admit, Cirsium vulgare does have a very pretty, purple flower.

[aoioozora]

The Ghosts as Civilians

Headcanons I have of the Ghosts if they weren't in the military; what jobs they'd have, hobbies, and whatnot. Enjoy :)

Logan Walker

It's generally agreed upon that Logan would spend his teenage years skateboarding and surfing since he's a Cali boy, and I can see it being true

As for jobs, I think he'd not prefer a desk job but work that can get his hands dirty like construction or carpentry or something of that sort. Blue collar boy.

He'd enjoy sitting in his room playing video games on a Gameboy or a 3DS as a young boy, and when he's older I think he'd enjoy a Playstation.

He'd totally be a night owl.

I think he'd be the best cook out of the Walkers and would be in charge of the Walker household meals, which he complains a lot about but secretly enjoys doing

David 'Hesh' Walker

Also a skateboarder but I think he'd lean more on surfing

I can totally see Hesh being an athlete! Like a basketball player because of his build and height.

Imagine him playing streetball though. And then getting drafted into the NBA. Oooh drool.

Early bird. Would love the early morning hours for surfing or playing ball.

His indoor hobbies would be playing video games with Logan and reading detective novels.

Elias 'Scarecrow' Walker

He'd work your average 9-5 white collar job but dream of retiring and working on a garden and carpentry projects, perhaps making bird feeders and building furniture

He'd collect all his pieces of wood for "later use".

Besides carpentry, his other hobby would be nagging his sons to do something else other than playing videogames.

He'd love board games and card games and would always try to get his sons to play with him (but they don't like to because he always wins)

Buys a bouquet of flowers every year on his late wife's birthday and on their wedding day; keeping up the tradition

Keegan P. Russ

I'm a bit torn on what he would work as because I can see him working both in construction and a 9-5. I think he'd be quite flexible in that way. Jack of all trades, master of none. His CV is filled with his experience in a variety of jobs

He never really struck me as someone with a lot of hobbies since he probably had a rough early life and have no time for those things

If he had any hobby at all, I think he'd enjoy taking photos of sunsets, the sky at the grocery store, or any sight he finds unique and interesting.

I feel like he would keep a journal, jotting down bullet points of his day and little notes of what he feels.

Thomas Merrick

For some reason I like to think of him as working in a restaurant as a chef. He just gives me that vibe

He'd enjoy the fast paced environment.

I don't know how well he cooks, but he sure looks like he'd make a mean burger

He would enjoy night walks down quiet streets and if he had a dog, he'd walk the dog too.

He'd also enjoy watching videos of blacksmiths forging knives, swords, hammers and the like

Alex 'Ajax' Johnson

I think he'd totally be a barista in an old timey café.

On the side, he'd be building an online presence for himself on YouTube

He would be very into fashion, I feel, making content like Parker York Smith. He'd be the most fashionable of the Ghosts.

Avid reader. Has a whole wall in his apartment that's a shelf filled with books.

Kick

Computer boy works a computer job. I think he'd get into a security related job, maybe even get a job in the FBI if he's lucky

And when he's not working, he's streaming his video games

He would love attending comedy night shows and sit right up front, hoping to be asked something by the comedian. He'd enjoy a witty back-and-forth.

[Bonus] Gabriel Rorke

He'd be in a biker gang, I know it. He has the vibe

Otherwise he'd be in the pest control or extermination business, or maybe even something to do with landscaping

LOVES barbecues and invites the Walkers often to eat with him

Very outdoors man. He'd love camping and hiking

Religiously goes to the gym six times a week. He thrives off of physical activity!

[wires-and-hellfires]

Alastor & child! reader headcanons: First Meeting

Pairing: Alastor & child! reader

Description: Alastor finds a young child wandering around hell and wonders why they were sent here - he quickly finds out.

Warnings: Mentions of child abuse, graphic violence, straight-up murder, manipulation, Alastor as a warning in itself

Author note: First time writing for Hazbin Hotel! Might expand on this, gimme your thought, also this was written at 3am so be gentle with me please-

Your life before hell wasn't... ideal

Always taught to be quiet, to stay out of the way, to stick to the shadows, to be a good child

Trained how to make the adults around you happy, when to say sorry even if you did no wrong, when to cower, when to run

So when you finally snapped and exterminated the vermin that was your parents and every one of their disgusting "coworkers"-

Well, you weren't apologizing for that one, even if your actions led to your own death at the young age of 8

It was almost fitting that upon your arrival to hell, you quickly realized that the shadows bent to your will and people around you seemed inclined to do what you wanted if you just... asked nicely enough

The skills of manipulation and a quick escape never grew out of style, apparently

Upon learning of the exterminations that take place in hell, the irony of being sent there over some pest control of your own did not escape you

After the newest extermination was a good time for you!

You danced in and out of the long shadows on the walls cast by the VoxTech tv's and pickpocketed what you could from his dazed victims

Suddenly stumbling over a curb, you knocked into one of the sinners gathered outside of the store, gaining a snarl from him as he grabbed your arm

With a quick whisper of "Please let me go, you never saw me" his grip slackened and released, eyes dull as he turned back to the screen

You didn't see the famed "radio demon" across the road exiting the tailor, but he saw you

A young sinner taking advantage of the vulnerable? Why it warmed his heart

And when you disappeared into the shadows? Well wasn't that curious...

After his broadcast, he himself slipped into the darkness, letting them guide him to your location

After all, he could recognize what shadows felt like when they were manipulated.

And what a show he walked into!

One man sat slumped against the alley wall, neck bent forward at an unnatural angle

Another lay on the ground, seemingly still alive (for now-), blood pooling out of the gaping hole in his stomach

The last of the group was on all fours, gasping out apologies through bloody lips to a small figure standing over him

The child leaned forward and grinned at the sinner in front of them

"Why don't you try begging a bit more and maybe I'll forgive you? Go on, say sorry again."

Alastor felt his smile slip into something a bit more maniacally pleased

Why, weren't you such a delightful surprise?

The demon before you managed to plead for a total of 15 seconds before you let out a disappointed sigh and a shadow surged forward, severing his head from the rest of his body

"Well, well, well! What a performance! Encore, encore!"

Wide eyes snapped to his as he strolled forward, and though you may not recognize his face after his little... absence, his broadcast earlier was heard clearly all around hell

Even in dark alleys where children lured bad men to their deaths

Before a word slipped from your lips, Alastor held out his palm in a silencing gesture

"Now, now, no need to be afraid, little one! I was just seeking some entertainment for the night! And what a show it was, truly! Bravo!"

And, well, when was the last time someone told you did a good job?

Maybe that's why you didn't even try to talk your way out of the situation.

Or perhaps it was the pounding of your heart, the rhythm of a predator sizing up another creature and weighing their chances against them

Frankly, you weren't confident there was a way out of this situation other than doing whatever it was the radio demon wanted

"Oh my, where are my manners? Alastor, dear, the name is Alastor! You may recognize me from my radio show?"

Despite the blood coating you, he held out his hand to shake

Hesitantly, you grasp it with your own, giving the demon your name

"Lovely, just lovely! Say, what do you think of allowing me the absolute pleasure of a late-night stroll through cannibal town? We could discuss your future aspirations and perhaps even come to a... deal of sorts!"

At the expression on your face, Alastor out a bark of staticky laughter

"Oh no, no, not for your soul, child! Though I would just love ownership of such a thing, I understand that you may feel a tad hesitant! Let me explain and then decide, hmm?"

You stare at him and his unyielding grin

You learnt all the truths your parents shoved down your throat before until you sent them down to hell

Perhaps now you could learn even more valuable lessons from Alastor

You nod at the overlord before you and his grin somehow stretches further

"Fabulous! Come along now!"

Following the radio demon out of the blood-stained alleyway, the shadows thrash against the walls in approval as you feel a smile of your own begin to form

[lets-try-some-writing]

I wanted to ask in your opinion what it be like for the TFP Bots if they landed on a version of Earth were the Quiet Place aliens or Death Angel already arrived? Destroying most cities and forcing most of humanity into silence.

While I don't think the Death Angel's could fatally kill a Cybertronian, they could still probably make significant scratches to their armor and even hit vulnerable places like the optics. But they could be hell on their equipment given they attack everything that makes noise.

This is an interesting thought! (one that I totally didn't lose in my inbox for like four months. nope.)

I agree that a Death Angel probably couldn't kill a Cybertronian. But throwing in my own headcanons, I think the Death Angels wouldn't actually be all that interested in the bots themselves. In the movie, based on what I saw, the Death Angels hunted things that were organic and acted as such. Perhaps in the beginning the Death Angels would be on the bots, but I do believe that would end quickly. A few slashes and cuts perhaps, but nothing more. The Death Angels have better things to do than slash at something they can't even eat.

Although, it would be interesting if Cybertronians are familiar with the Death Angels. Maybe they ran into them once or twice long ago. Whatever the case, it probably wouldn't be all that hard for them to arrive on Earth, roll their optics, and proceed to blast the correct waves in order to ward the Death Angels off so they could get to work. I imagine they would see the Death Angels as annoying flies at best. If one gets into the base, its like trying to get a hornet into a jar to yeet it outside for them.

Ratchet: We've got another one!

Death Angel: *ominous creature noises*

Ratchet: Gross. Someone go get rid of the thing. I have work to do.

Optimus, who was very much not busy two seconds ago: I am afraid I am also preoccupied.

Bumblebee, Cliffjumper & Arcee: *suspicious whistling*

Bulkhead: You know what? FINE. I will go get it

I doubt anyone would have fun trying to grab one of the buggers and throw them outside, but it wouldn't be any worse than the before mentioned hornet example. I don't see them actually caring all that much about being quiet or avoiding the Death Angels until they stumble upon the humans and their struggle. Then they might start running pest control.

[vixien11]

BESTIE NEW PROMT JUST DROPPED!!!

Emily gets blackout drunk and writes a 1200 page erotica novel (maybe even longer) that makes her girlfriends (Charlie and vaggie) a mix between turned on and mildly concerned the more they read. The hazbins have a bit of a book club because NO ONE knows what’s in the book not even Emily cause she was completely blacked out. It’s a really good book too, the story beats, the characters, the emotions are all leaving the hotel impressed and gobsmacked.

Hah! Okay I just have to write this. Sorry I took a while to respond!(Totally not going to base the novel after a project I'm working on) Emily: (Wakes up groggily and rubs her face as she lifts her head away from a hard object) Ugh... I need to stop asking Charlie's aunt for beezle juice... (Looks down at the object her face was resting on to find a hardcover book called Weeping Horizons. After a moment of looking at it, she notices it says she wrote the book.) Emily: What? I.. I wrote a whole book..? It looks long. How did I even make it hardcover while drunk!? (She looks the book up and down) Well.. Better tell everyone else about this. Later, the whole crew is circled up around this book, eyeing it confusedly. Emily: Next thing I know, I'm wake up with this book. I don't even know what genre it is... (The Hazbins were looking at the book with awe as the cover had a feathered woman with long, pearly white hair curling around her face. The golden eyes of the women sparked a little bit off blood that was inching down her face.) Emily: But the cover looks like my art style.. Charlie: Alright. We'll just read it then! Can't be that bad. (Opens the book tentatively) An hour later, Angel is the only one immune enough to the contents of the book to read it out loud. Angel: Silk gasp as Phoenix licked the blood on her neck and drew circles on her collar bone... (Eyes widen) Okay.. Dove.. (Points at Emily) How the hell are YOU the one who wrote this..!? (Charlie and Vaggie are both blushing profusely and Emily is burying her face in a pillow) Emily: I DON'T KNOOOOW!! I WAS DRUNK OKAY?! Alastor: (Ears are back in asexual disapproval) Yet you have not one grammar mistake... (Flinches back with a small wendigo screech as he reads ahead.) Angel: Well at least I got the stomach for this. (Clears his throat before continuing to read) Half an hour later, it is Vaggie who is reading while the rest of the Hazbins are bawling their eyes out. Vaggie: (Wipes eye) Orchid knew she had made a grave error.. She knew her girlfriends despised her for every moment she had lied. Lied about her past. A shiver went down her spine as she watched Silk's eyes darken. A whimper escaped her.. (Her voice catches) Husk: (Lip trembles slightly) What the fuck are you doing?! Keep reading, dumbass! Angel: FUCK 'EM, ORCHID! I STAND BY YA!! THOSE BITCHES JUST NEED TA LISTEN TO YA! (Cries into Husk's shoulder) Cherri: Fuck you talkin' about, Angi? She ruined there relationship because she lied! She used to kill off civilians like it was pest control! Angel: (Head shooting up from Husk's shoulder) SHE CHANGED AND YOU KNOW IT!! Charlie + Emily: (Hiccupping and clutching either side of Vaggie for support) Cherri: Angi, I will go to war over this. HER REDEMTION ARC HAS BEEN LAME AS FUCK SO FAR!! Angel: (Dramatic ahh gasp) How FUCKING DARE you!! Vaggie: Is no one going to talk about how fucking tragic Pheonix is!? Like hello? Cursed to never be taken seriously but also is why everyone is still as mentally sound as they are! Charlie: (Wipes face) I am SUCH a Pheonix kinnie... Husk: Keep reading! Vaggie: (Sighs and mentally prepares to continue reading.) Should I keep writing this? :3

[localcanadiancreature62]

More of these mfs. More Perfect Plan/Perfect World au stuff.

Plot - So basically,Ford willingly gave out the equation to Bill by word of mouth while the triangle abided by his word regarding him promising that Stan and the twins remain unharmed if he got what he wanted. Ford then added that he agreed on joining Bill and his Henchmaniacs in wreaking havoc on the world with Global Weirdmaggedon,which overjoyed the isosceles as his genius finally agrees with him for once throughout their aggressive push and pull dynamic despite him not knowing the real reason why Ford joined him (he plans on getting closer to Bill and gaining his favor as he used the triangle's favoritism of him to be spared from the various atrocities that his former muse is going to commit while he tries to come up with a way to kill Bill with a sneak attack without him knowing). Stan and the twins got to escape the town with their lives intact while bringing everyone else with them as Dipper and Stan don't trust Ford anymore ever since he decided to choose Bill over them,not knowing the truth about his decision,they left along with the rest of the zodiac wheel members as they knew that Bill would shatter the town without a single inch of concern. Ford then spends five months as Bill's plus one in the end of the world,watching the triangle escape the town with the lack of a barrier keeping him inside as he conquered every country in the world as every world leader began to worship him and change their nations to be in his image in order to appease the isosceles.

Bill razed said nations daily while putting them back together just to rinse and repeat the next day,he also erased all consequences via his newfound time abilities after destroying Time Baby. Six months later,Bill has totally taken control of the entire world as he not only got the world's leaders to agree with his demands but he also literally has eyes everywhere while having clones of himself manage every corner of the world so that he knows EXACTLY what's going on. The triangle has started a worldwide tyranny and Ford just has to sit back and watch lest his plan of destroying Bill in secret gets ruined.

Bill and the Henchmaniacs enjoy their newfound iron grip on Dimension 46'/ as they finally get to have a home that isn't actively rotting or empty meanwhile Bill is just glad to have a giant human playground all to himself. Although being on top and having everything you want can get a bit boring,so Bill decides to "liberate" Dimension 46'/ like he planned as he burnt it to the ground similarly to what he did with Euclydia. Ford didn't like that. He was fucking traumatized as he watched the isosceles destroy his entire dimension,thus making him lose his family his friends and his home,he watched from the Nightmare Realm using a crystal ball that Bill gave him so he could see the whole thing. Ford basically had a mental breakdown as he attempted to kill Bill for causing him such a devastating loss,fruitlessly blasting his laser gun at the near godly triangle whom he knew could destroy him in an instant with his ability to control space matter and time itself but he didn't care as he needed to get rid of the pest that ruined his life.

Bill instantly regretted his decision to raze the man's dimension,as he thought that Ford would be fine with it since he went along with everything else and this made him realize that his genius won't join him in ruling the universe anymore after he destroyed the guy's dimension (plus he doesn't want Ford to be unhappy) like he planned (as his plan was basically "Conquer the world,destroy the world,and then rule the multiverse with Fordsy by my side"). So Bill stopped time before Ford could kill him and then he ended up fixing his horrible mistake by creating a whole dream world for his genius with Fidds Stan the twins and everyone still alive but as non sentient copies that agree with the researcher's every word.

"You fucking MONSTER. HOW DARE YOU DESTROY EVERYTHING I EVER HAD?!. WHEN I STAYED BY YOUR SIDE AND AGREED TO ALL OF YOUR DEMANDS THROUGHOUT THESE FEW MONTHS?!. I WILL DESTROY YOU UNTIL THERE'S NOTHING LEFT OF YOUR DAMNED GEOMETRIC BODY!." Ford exclaims as he then tries to lunge at the triangle,with sheer anger and hatred in his eyes as Bill then telekinetically stops him from tackling him. "I thought that you chose me over your dumb family,Fordsy. Turns out i was wrong. I kept them alive for as long as i could,but they had to go along with EVERYTHING ELSE." Bill remarks as he laughs maniacally,appearing to not regret his horrible mistake as he watched the man growl at him with pure rage in his expression.

"Once you release me,i will tear you limb from limb. Molecule from molecule. I will build a machine that'll give you the most EXCRUCIATING PAIN POSSIBLE. And i will NEVER choose you,i never did. I only did because i was planning on destroying you from the start,i should've killed you earlier before playing along with your game though before you could do THIS to me." Ford replied as he glared at the triangle while explaining the truth about his plan regarding why he joined his so called muse despite being hesitant at first. Bill then realizes that Ford will never consciously choose him,unless he did something about that. He then came up with an idea,to fix everything both for him and his genius.

"*sigh*. No one will ever choose me. Unless i make them." Bill says as he then telekinetically pulls Ford closer to him and then he touches the man's forehead,making the man flinch and squirm but he then stops struggling once Bill gets ahold of his memories which he starts to nitpick until he replaced all of them with more positive less traumatizing ones while erasing his memory of their prior argument a few seconds ago. Ford becomes more peaceful and less pissy as he then asks his husband about what they're doing in an empty void (what Dimension 46'/ became after Bill destroyed everything),becoming a bit disoriented from the mind fuckery. Bill then tells him to wait in the Nightmare Realm as he nudges him toward a portal that leads to the decaying dimension while he creates a surprise for his genius.

This is the beginning of Bill's Perfect World for Ford. Then a week later,Bill and Ford enjoy their new lives in Ford's new condo/company building that consists of his new anomaly research facility called the Oregon Institute of Oddology as Bill continues on destroying and conquering worlds while he enjoys his spot as the multiverse's eternal ruler which he acquired in only a short time due to his current power level with him being able to control space matter and time. This brings us to now,to Ford's perfect life with his isosceles partner.

[sweeneydino]

*BIG INHALE* Hi! I’ve been rotating the Spikeangelo au in my brain for a while, and things might get incomprehensible real quick. Not all questions, some just comments... 90% of this is just musing as the train of thought jumps rails and causes massive casualties; no need to answer all if you chose to answer any.

1. The fact that Master Splinter lets Titan live with them BEFORE he knows that he’s a version of Mikey, even after the attempted murder… man will look at a mutated turtle, ask, “Is anyone going to adopt that?” and not wait for an answer.

2. In Turtle Temper, Splinter says, “Spike, chew on your leaf if you are in the mood for a story”. Ronin has a choice here: pest Raph by eating, or troll Splinter by not. What choice would he make?

3. It seems like during the Slash and Destroy episode, Titan already had his outfit. If so… where did he get the clothes? The little turtles don’t really wear anything (and their clothes would be much smaller), so unless Splinter has a secret goth wardrobe, the only thing I can think of is that Raph is Very Optimistic about how tall he’s going to get, and has stockpiled clothes accordingly.

4. A while back you mentioned Titan “chewing [Shredder] out” after Shredder kills Splinter during the Triceraton invasion. The image you drew made it look like a tirade, but the first thing that came to mind for me was… more along the lines of using Shredder as a dog toy.

5. You said that after Slash and Destroy, Titan hides for a while out of shame. When does he rejoin the others? Before the invasion, *during* the invasion, after? Does he join the farmhouse arc, or does he do as canon Slash does and defend NYC while the rest of the turtles are gone?

Ah... there's a very long part six that's just about the ghosts... I don't think I'll be bothering you with that today.

When I see these types of asks, I can never control the squeal that comes out of my mouth. I love detailed analyses about my aus

:D

I also love completing things, so let's do them all!

1) Yep! Idk whats with the Splinters, but if it's turtle-shaped and needs a home, well say no more!

When Spike turned to Titan, Splinter already sensed something off with him, something more familiar than a family pet, but he would never figure out why until their lair is attacked by the kraang at the start of the invasion.

It's hard not to realize that your son's former pet knows moves (and shows a strange amount of wisdom) that you're 90% sure you never taught or shown to any of your sons.

2)

I think he's still upset about the pizza. Or Raph's anger.

3)Dumpster diving?

I'll be honest, I forgot to write it down... So we will stick to this simple solution for now🗿

4)

Okay, well... Shredder ALMOST became a dog toy. Let's just say that (this will totally not be a future comic)

5) He reunites with them after the newtralizer arc! After a little convincing ofc

When the invasion begins, he's with Splinter and Leatherhead, having defended their home and now searching for the turtles. They find Shredder after they exit the sewer, and Titan isn't too pleased to see the old bastard, attacking him in a rage once he hears about Leo's possible "demise."

Unfortunately, when he gains the upper hand, Titan is the one caught off guard and knocked into the machine, crushed by the pipes.

Before Shredder could really begin his usual evil monologue, he becomes distracted with Leatherhead, allowing Splinter to check on Titan and help him out of the pile of metal. Despite the likelihood of having a huge bruise on his ribs, he'd be fine. Even better if he could get rid of all their issues right there in front of him.

The one wrestling an alligator. And somehow winning.

And when he sees that devil in that all too familiar armor toss leatherhead into the pit, he's all too ready to kill him.

Yet he can't. Because He's not the only one wanting to prevent the past from happening again.

Splinter sends him away to find his sons, Titan's brothers - well, sorta - and even if he wants to bring Oroku Saki, the worse pain imaginable, he's more concerned if they are okay.

...

Okay, well, if the rest of them are okay

COUGH COUGH.

He'd find them, with him.

And uh. I think Leo's perfectly fine.

So when they decided to leave for April's farmhouse, he stayed in the city to search for Splinter and the other Mutanimals after leaving Leo with the others.

Maybe he sees himself as a burden.

Then the rest you make up on the way 👍 /j

This was very fun! Maybe I should just write paragraphs or smol little chapters with much more detail and flow🤔

Nah, I'll just draw.

Can't wait for the looooooooooonnngggg part six :D

[ghost-mantis]

What Great Being Build Meetings Must Have Looked Like Shortly Before The Shattering…

Great Being 1: “Okay, we need ideas for what to put in this giant robot to help it restore Spherus Magna. Anyone have some ideas?”

Great Being 2: “Oh! Me me me! I made a robot dog that would be perfect for this!”

Great Being 1: “Uh, okay. What does it do?”

Great Being 2: “This!”

Great Being 1: “Why did you give it a flamethrower? How does that help anything?!”

Great Being 2: “….welding?”

Great Being 1: *Tired Sigh* “Okay, fine. Whatever. Approved. Now, any HELPFUL ideas?”

Great Being 3: *Raises Hand* “Well, you know how cool the giant scorpion with tank treads and a laser gun was, right?”

Great Being 1: “ NO! No that was not cool! It killed half the build team and blew up an entire research outpost! We had to dump it in the desert because none of us could kill it!”

Great Being 3: “It’s okay! I made the new version safe this time!”

Great Being 1: “Safe how?”

Great Being 3: “I scaled it down and put it on a robot spider. No crushing tank treads. Totally safe. We can use em as pest control.”

Great Being 1: “That’s actually not a bad idea. Wait…you did scale down the power of the laser right?”

Great Being 3: “Uhhhhh…”

Great Being 1: *Facepalms* “We don’t have time for a redesign…approved. Please, does anyone have something useful that won’t murder everything we’ve built?”

Great Being 4: *Raises Cup* “I left my coffee in the protodermis test lab overnight and it’s got this weird mold growing on it now. It might be good for something.”

Great Being 1: “Fine, sure. It can’t possibly be worse than the murder animals. Dump it in a protodermis pond somewhere.”

*****100,000 Years Later*****

[spearxwind]

could we get an infodump abt the new broken horizon lore? how i found you was through extinction, so glad to see them back!!!

Absolutely!

The world of Broken Horizon is a planet (that I've yet to name) which has two major sentient species on it: humans and dragons (or khevirs in their own language). Both species coexisted side by side in relative peace (as much peace as two equally matched apex predators would have).

At some point in their history, Cercerion, a dragon with enough power to become a God, goes haywire and starts creating and becoming storms that span almost the entirety of the planet. These storms are devastating electrical hurricane cells that are charged enough to create their own magnetic fields, the incessant lightning rain is enough to literally rip chunks of earth, even mountains, out of the ground and earth and keep them in the air because of these magnetic fields. This is obviously DEVASTATING to the planet.

Eventually, a joint mutual effort from both humans and dragons is able to take Cer down, striking him down hard enough to bury him deep in the earth to sleep for ages, but the impact is so sudden that he cannot dispel the storms he created and loses control of them, leaving them to eternally roam the planet sowing destruction in their paths. There are six in total. (They are much less dangerous than when he IS in control though and the lightning rain is reduced significantly. But they are still MASSIVE hurricanes)

After this event, humans freak the fuckkkk out and in true human fashion decide that dragons are dangerous and must be exterminated. A massive war breaks out between both species where they try to obliterate each other (this is known as the Great Dragonslaying Era). Both sides develop technology to stay on par with each other (humans develop insane machinery, and dragons develop energy manipulation).

The war rages on for years, but true to their nature they an never truly best each other, and the war ends MANY years later in a shaky stalemate from both sides. This would be the present day.

Since the war has only recently ended, there are very few laws that regulate dragons and their rights in human territories, and viceversa. Using dragons as fighting dogs in gladiator arenas and treating them as animals is 'illegal', but extremely common in human cities. That would be the situation where our Extinction crew find themselves in.

Despite all the animosity towards each other, there are a great many people who want to uphold the peace and want to peacefully coexist and even work together (this is the basis for dragon piloting); but there are also extremists on both sides who still believe the others should be exterminated: humans who consider dragons a threat and a pest and no more than animals, and dragons who are unhappy with being 'tamed' and who clamor for a return to being ruthless deadly beasts.

----

Honestly, the setting of Extinction itself isnt that much changed! It's mostly been tweaked to be a lot more cohesive with the worldbuilding and the world's history. I have added a bunch more in the aspect of dragonflight and races and planes because I think its cool as hell. The gladiator side of it is only one fraction of the world.

[alatusperegrinus]

Wanderer/Reader Smut (Chapter 9 from my drabbles collection)

(pining, solo masturbation, yearning, kinda detailed plot before the p*rn lmao)

After his failed deification, Wanderer decided that he will never, ever desire for something again, unless that thing is attainable, of course.

But then suddenly, you came along, totally messing with the puppet's head. Opposing his nihilistic point of view, and embracing his identity, his truth, and whatever he may be. Wanderer never needed a person in his life until you.

You're not annoying as the other humans. You move with grace, with respect. You only talk when needed. You answer in straight, specific words. You're terrifyingly smart that Wanderer doubts that you're from Teyvat. But since Nahida knows you, and you're her beck and call, you must be worthy of his and the Archon's trust.

Wanderer rarely ever admires other beings. Why should he? Good for them if they're good at something. There are far more important things he must deal with. And yet, he couldn't help but stop and stare whenever you deal with the pests along your way. In just a flick of your hand, you were able to dispose them, and that is not something human beings in Teyvat are capable of. Your strenght is no joke, that he thought— one time— to better not do something that will incur your wrath.

Wanderer would never admit the way your presence changed his life. In the course of your journeys with him, he has learned a lot about you, your thoughts, and your life. He knew that you were alone for thousands of years, traversing the universe. You have learned about life so much more than him, that he was willing to listen, to learn from you, hanging on to every word you say, that Wanderer would never do for others.

He craved the warmth he felt whenever he sat next to you, then both your shoulders would touch. Missing the softness of the back of your hand whenever it would accidentally brush against his as you two walked side by side. Hearing your low, soft voice speaking next to his ear, telling him stories of the vast universe, its forbidden secrets that only him should know, hearing your voice despite you not being beside him, but only him, alone on his bed.

At this point, Wanderer must be coveting you. And he couldn't bring himself to admit it.

Wanderer doesn't need sleep, and when he has to, he thinks of you before falling asleep. He brings himself back to the times you two were together for missions. And when he feels his consciousness and control slipping away, his daydreams turn into dreams of kissing you. A dream that he tried to deny and forget when he woke up in the morning.

The past few weeks, Wanderer felt more and more agitated. Why do thoughts of you kept running on his mind day and night? Why were the nights in Sumeru City suddenly so cold? Why did he keep hearing you even though you're not there with him at all?

The puppet rarely dreams, yet now he does, ranging from reliving the memories spent with you, to dreams of you craddling his face with your soft hands. Combing his hair lightly with your fingers. Kissing his cheek, that trailed to his neck. The dream would hazily jump to the next scene, his attire were undressed by you so gently. Leaving kisses as his skin exposed to the air....

Wanderer laid on his bed, his thoughts drifted to the latest dream he had of you. Fuck, he missed you so much. When could he see you again? When would Lesser Lord Kusanali call you again for favors and have him tag along to your excursions so that he could spend time with you again?

He felt uncomfortable with the way his now swollen cock did not want to soften anytime soon. Wanderer knew about such humanly desires, yet he never found the time to indulge. He never found reason for it until now. Well, there's so no other to stop his strong urge but to jerk it off.

Hastily pulling his shorts down, Wanderer gingerly wrapped his hand on his cock. Gliding his hand up and down, he started to settle on a pace. Closing his eyes, he easily imagined you taking care of him. Continuing the dream he had, you kissed the porcelain skin of his chest while leaving small hickies that trailed down to his lower abdomen. Wanderer shivered, hand that he used to work himself up now feeling tensed yet he persevered. Because in his imagination, you were sucking his length up and down, same speed as his hand. Your lips were as tight as his hand, you would occasionally tease his head with your tongue, and Wanderer would jerk uncontrollably.

"Hah, please..."

Wanderer started to let out high-pitched whines, his hand increased in speed and tightness, his desperation for you intensified when he started to imagine your pussy swallowing all of his length. Bouncing up and down on top of Wanderer as you hug him tighter to you, Wanderer could almost smell your scent in his imagination. He was shaking, —hips jerking, he felt his climax coming anytime sooner.

With a hushed voice, he moaned your name once, twice, thrice— until it became a prayer. Tears started pooling on the corner of his shut eyes. Oh Archons, he wanted you so bad. So bad. Please let him have you. He hoped that you wanted him back as much as he wants you.

Whimpers, moans, and whines spilled from his mouth as he came hard to the thought of you. Wanderer felt like a pervert. Yet he felt so good. Could he bear meeting you again in person after thinking of you in a perverse way? Yes, that would still be better than not seeing you at all.

[y-rhywbeth2]

Next stage in the 'who has a bigger body count' competition Astarion started yesterday, while praying I can use a calculator correctly:

Bhaal VS Cazador: Deaths in Baldur's Gate over the last 15 years.

I counted about 22 active Bhaalists (including Orin, Sarevok and Durge), who, having to murder once every ten days, have about 12,045 kills between them. However, as briefly mentioned in game, most of them do not reside in Baldur's Gate and also Bhaal's clergy are usually a little nomadic, so this wouldn't have been too highly focused on the Gate.

They do need to kill a living thing every day, so that's also another 108,405 dead things which may or may not be human/oid.

As for the vampires, assuming they don't have a massive herd of blood dolls:

While vampires do need to feed a little less as they age, it's still not that much lower.

A typical Fledgling vampire must drink 12 hit points worth of blood in every 24-hour period. The source of this blood is immaterial; it can come from living victims, fresh corpses, animals, or even sealed “caches" of chilled blood. - Van Richten's Guide to Vampires

The typical person, people with adventuring classes being rarer, has 4 hit points. Or less. Sometimes you're lucky and 5e upgrades them to 1d8 with an average of 4. Add in older editions and level drain and normal people do not survive being fed on by vampires.

Judging by talking to Astarion, Cazador does drain his prey dry more often than not.

So on average Cazador has needed 3 kills a day, and over the past 15 years that's 3 kills every one of 5,475 days. Which is apparently 16,425 dead bodies. (7000 is small change to vampires and Archdevils alike, apparently. I keep coming back to this, but Mephistopheles' deal is extremely and suspiciously cheap.) Each spawn has needed about 12 rats each: 65,700 rats dead each, 459,900 rats altogether. I assume they feed the corpses to the ghouls.

Cazador forbidding his spawn human blood actually makes perfect sense. Aurelia and Astarion have been with him for most of that 200 years. Cazador has murdered at least the equivalent of 73,000 people, if those two also feed properly it's now 219,000 people. Petras and I assume Violet, are about 100: 109,500 kills each (or more). 438,000 people. Yousen is 60 (65,700), Dalyria less than 50 due to being a Peer (54,750); Leon's less than 12 (13,140). Altogether this 'family' would have killed aprox. 571,590 people over the last two centuries.

The Western Heartlands' city and town populations, circa 14th century, were:

Baldur's Gate: 42,103 Elturel: 22,671 Evereska: 21,051 Berdusk: 20,242 Iriaebor: 16,193 Scornubel: 14,574 High Edge: 9,716 Asbravn: 5,668 Hluthvar: 5,668 Beregost: 2,915 Secomber: 1,417 Daggerford: 891 Corm Orp: 810

Census indicates the Western Heartlands' total permanent population was 163,919, of which Cazador would have consumed the equivalent of 44.53%. I can only assume that he either fasts a lot or mixes in some animal blood (which would not have made him fun to be around for the spawn), or we're drawing off of VtM logistics and he has control of blood banks and a herd of living people he keeps alive plus just feeding off of his spawn to top him up between murders (which does explain the human staff).

I'm not counting the amounts of rats and mice consumed, but honestly I think there's money to be made hiring your spawn out as a pest control service. Assuming they don't drive themselves out of business.

There is absolutely no way the 7000 spawn in the cells should be anything but feral howling messes who are scrabbling for rats and bugs and cannibalising each other, assuming they haven't just shrivelled into the state of torpor from lack of blood to fuel the magic keeping their bodies animate. There is no feasible way to keep them fed. I don't even think there are enough rodents in the city to feed them...

Meanwhile Bhaalists have been active for 130 years since the end of the Bhaalspawn crisis, and have killed around 4,745 people each in that time. Luckily, they've been quite low in number, mostly nomadic, and only recently had a revival (which is still low population) so that probably not too many.

Verdict: DnD maths is poorly thought out and the vampires win the murder competition by goddamn miles. While Bhaal wins overall, due to having 1300+ years of murders to his name, Cazador's recent activity is higher, and Astarion has been accomplice to the number of murders that Durge only dreams of. Durge is still winning in the sadism and first degree murder count though.

[adiluv-moved]

omg omg going off your obsessed scara can you imagine how he'd react if you got with somebody???? boy would go crazy

❥ 𝐎𝐁𝐒𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐍 𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐀 𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐊𝐄𝐍. ˚⊹꒷

a continuation of this post.

796 words. modern au, obsessive fan behavior, stalking, suggestive, reader is not traveler, not edited.

superfan scaramouche who is initially ecstatic when your group's official accounts announce an upcoming tour within inazuma, hours that he could've—should've spend asleep instead being dedicated to scouring your accounts for venue announcements and pre-sale dates. he goes into a frenzy once the information drops, pulling all-nighters in order to secure tickets at every one of the concerts.

superfan scaramouche who has, as mentioned previously, seen you in person before—attending previous performances both within his home nation and travelling abroad to attend the tours that weren't. but, archons, he just can't control his excitement when it comes to you, having him acting as if it were his first concert.

the chance of seeing his favorite idol while going about his day-to-day, encountering you at all his favorite spots in the city, the possibility of something romantic... his delusional little mind just can't help but jump at it!

superfan scaramouche who personally visits each and every large hotel within inazuma city, convincing ꒰manipulating꒱ them into providing any information they have about exactly where you and your groupmates will be staying. he'll make sure that you, specifically, have the best room in the entire building—anonymously shelling out his own money for sake of upgrading you and you alone.

superfan scaramouche who lurks around your hotel in the same baggy clothing he'd used to disguise himself whilst meeting you, an ominous presence hidden in the crowd that can't help but unsettle you during attempts to go sightseeing before your first show. your nervous expressions are even more intoxicating in the snapshots he takes of you, tucked away in a corner of his room for personal viewing.

superfan scaramouche who has his delusions unceremoniously shattered when his lurking leads him into a bar, eyes wide as saucers and mouth agape as he watches you converse and—and kiss another man that approaches you! despite the stabbing feeling within his chest, he's left totally unable to act as the both of you—intoxicated—stumble out the doors, instead rushing home in tears and on the verge of a mental breakdown. he... doesn't sleep that night.

superfan scaramouche who eventually manages to convince himself that your betrayal is really nothing more than a one-night stand. after all, you certainly couldn't have been in your right mind꒰!꒱ allowing such an... insignificant pest to whisk you away. surely, you must've come to your senses by morning, felt so ashamed by your low standards that you'd come shamefully crawling back to your room.

... only to be proven wrong as he catches you sneaking out during the evening, face hidden beneath an oversized hoodie as you went to go entertain that miscreant yet again. he's in far worse spirits when he returns home, tearing his room apart and destroying half of his merch collection before coming to his senses.

superfan scaramouche who comes to regard this affair of yours as a mistake, even if you aren't exactly aware of it yet. nothing but a mar, if you will, on the perfection that comprises your very being. he's well versed in the dramas of the idol industry, knows well that agencies often exert total control over the lives of their idols. living beneath a ceo's thumb must get exhausting, he decides, a justifiable line of reasoning for this... act of rebellion. it's that worm's fault, really. taking advantage of somebody sweet as you—capitalizing on your naïvety.

superfan scaramouche who, as much as he doesn't want to, believes that there's merit in alerting your supervisors to your rendezvous. actions packaged under the guise of innocent concern, he emails photos of the two of you to your manager—intently eavesdropping on the commotion coming from the hotel that night. you cry until the early hours of morning, his heart aching with each muffled sob.

still, he feels no remorse for his actions, deeming your pain a necessary form of suffering. just like icarus, who flew too close to the sun, you too must learn not to play with fire—to avoid being burnt and falling from the sky.

superfan scaramouche who approaches you during one of your ꒰far more limited꒱ moments of downtime, pointing out the saddened look in your eyes and offering comfort when you vaguely detail your grievances. although there's something familiar about him and the words of praise that slip past his lips, the amount of fans you meet on a daily basis makes it impossible to place the connection—so you instead turn a blind eye and indulge in his comfort. he allows you to weep on his shoulder until your satisfied, the fabric moistened by your tears... revisited later that day.

"shh, shh... i know it hurts now, but really... this was all for the best."

i have a taglist, which you can sign up for here!

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

i love dove so much ;-; 🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞🪞 i want more of her pls

THANK YOU!

93 for 🪞:

---

“Okay,” Buck sighs. “Well… I still don’t know if I fully get it. But it doesn’t matter. You’re home, he’s home, so… I’m happy.”

Eddie smiles. It’s tight. Nervous. Like he knows he’s gotten away with a flimsy explanation, which isn’t usually a grace Buck affords to him. Buck’s actually not entirely sure why he’s letting it drop so easily. Maybe because he’s got things on his brain he doesn’t quite want to tell Eddie, either. 

“I’m happy, too,” Eddie says. 

I realized that he’s just kind of… He’s just kind of sad… 

“Then that’s what matters,” Buck replies, relinquishing any hopes of learning more. 

ii.

Christopher takes Buck’s words to heart. From there on out, he’s always kind to Dove. Even when she is kind of objectively annoying in a way that makes Buck want to call up Maddie and apologize for having once been young in her proximity. Because, wow? Once Chris starts giving her attention, Dove sort of becomes a pest. 

She’s kind of obsessed with Chris. Talks about him all the time. Thinks he’s the coolest person on earth. Buck and Eddie are completely old news. Did you know Chris learned how to make robots at school? Did you know Chris is better at video games than you? It’s constant and, frankly, adorable. Much better than her glaring at him like he’s a crooked picture hanging on the wall, anyway. 

For his part, Chris seems to quietly enjoy the attention. It’s always been just him. He’s always been the baby. Once he gets over the fact that there can in fact be two kids around, he takes it in stride. 

“He told me he can basically show her everything he likes and make her cool,” Eddie tells Buck one shift at work. “Like she’s a puppy to raise to do fun tricks.”

“Hmm,” Buck considers this. “I guess he’s not wrong. She’s still at a pretty impressionable age.”

“Yeah, I didn’t know whether or not to be concerned,” Eddie admits. 

“I mean, as long as he’s like… Reasonable?” Buck posits. “Like, not forcing any opinions or hobbies on her? Then I guess? Whatever? I think she wants to be like him regardless.”

Eddie shrugs. “He kind of likes that about her.”

“Diaz control freak genes are strong,” Buck nods. 

“Oh, fuck off,” Eddie rolls his eyes. “Wait until she learns what a clipboard is. Then she can adopt your style of control freak.”

“Hey, you jest, but that’s not a bad idea. It’s never too early to learn about effective organization and project management.”

Eddie rolls his eyes. But the gesture, Buck finds, is fond. 

iii.

They do end up taking both kids to the beach. It’s not really warm enough to enjoy the water properly, but they pack a lunch, and set out to have a good day regardless. 

Buck purchases and insists that Dove wear a lifejacket. Even when she complains that it looks silly. He doesn’t actually care. He, for one, will never take ocean safety lightly again in his life. Sure, she’s had a few swimming lessons in a pool. With no currents or waves. No undertow. The ocean is a totally different beast. One Buck is all too familiar with. 

Chris tells her as much when they pick him and Eddie up and she’s still grumbling out the life jacket. 

“It’s puffy,” she complains. “I don’t need one in swimming lessons.”

“Well, I don’t know,” Chris says. “I think it’s kind of smart to have. One time, Buck and I got hit by a really big wave called a tsunami. I wish I’d been wearing one then.”

Buck and Eddie tense in unison. Neither of them had planned on terrifying her today. 

“Really?” Dove asks. 

“Oh, yeah,” Chris nods. “It was super scary even though I’m a good swimmer. Better to be safe than sorry.”

A phrase Buck has used no less than ten times in explaining the necessity of this less-than-stylish piece of apparel. 

“Okay, Chris,” Dove says, sated. “That’s pretty smart.”

Wow. 

Eddie looks at Buck and snorts, amused. 

“Jokes on you,” Buck grumbles. “I’m sending her to your place next time she needs convincing of anything.”

Eddie shrugs. “I’m not complaining.”

▪️▪️▪️

It’s a really nice afternoon, even if it is a little chilly. Dove puts her feet in the ocean and makes a shrill giggle-shriek combo noise when a receding wave pulls sand over her toes. Eddie convinces her to look for sea glass.