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skaylanphear · 3 years ago

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Hi there! Do you have any advice on improving traction towards a fanwork/fic? I love writing—and it's not for notoriety by any means—but having validation and feedback also feels nice (I hope that's not conceited). What would you recommend to someone without a large audience/follower base? I do "advertise" on tumblr when my work is written/updated on AO3. How did your journey start? Thank you!

This is an interesting question and I doubt most people are going to like the answers, but here we go:

So, first and foremost, you need to be realistic about why you're creating in the first place. If you're doing work in a fandom that is older, where content has stopped coming out, or that is simply smaller, you're not going to get much engagement, period. There will, of course, be activity in these fandoms, but it will be far less and the people involved—while they may view your work—will be less likely to comment/spread it around simply because there's not much going on. So if you're creating in that sort of environment (which can be a really good environment if you're looking for something chill with no pressure), then you have to be prepared for low engagement, even if the people you do meet and who are willing to talk about your work are more regularly in your sphere. You can probably make better/closer friends in these sorts of fandoms, if you're willing to try.

But, on the other end of this, if you're coming into a huge fandom late, it's also going to be harder to wade through the massive following to get your stuff out there. For example, in both the Miraculous and Sk8 fandom, I started work pretty early on, when the shows were still gaining traction, and so my "name" as a creator gained traction parallel to that growth, as opposed to when I started writing in the Voltron fandom. With Voltron, I came in super late and so what few fics I had that did gain traction took a lot longer to get there because people already had their fav content creators in the fandom, etc. It's not impossible to get popular in this situation—far from it—but it does take longer.

You'll also benefit from having finished works early on in a fandom's lifespan, at least with writing. This is because there's less competition for views and so more people will be filtered to your work, initially. This means that you have a better chance of getting those comments and kudos. Having a finished work increases this engagement because people look for finished works before works in progress. Generally, the length of a fic doesn't matter much for popularity, so long as it's DONE. When I was writing in the ML fandom, quite a few of my earlier fics were shorter, and they compete in popularity with my longer fics, because people care more about having a finished story, not a long story. That's why when it came to Only Practice Makes Perfect in the Sk8 fandom, I worked hard to get that shit done, because it was the most popular story I had in the fandom and I decided—like an idiot—to make it a long fic. Which, yeah, means people probably love it/remember it more in the long run, but if I hadn't finished it in 2 to 3 months, I'd have lost considerable traction as far as making a name within the fandom.

This leads into one of the most important points, if not THE MOST IMPORTANT point in gaining an audience—consistency. If you do want to be a successful creator, you Have To Be Consistent. This is the most difficult hurdle for all creators, and it is oftentimes impossible to make happen. If you want to aim for professionalism, which a lot of fandom creators don't care about (which is fine), then consistency is how you get there. Nobody wants to read a fic or follow an artist who doesn't stick to creating what they start (RIP all my unfinished works and the people who left me as a result, LOL). Using my most recent works as an example, I very, very, very consistently updated Only Practice Makes Perfect multiple times a week. To the point where people got comfortable expecting it, which is the key variable here. When people become comfortable that you will regularly create content, they not only stick around, but will be more interactive with you and your work. Nobody likes the disappointment of getting involved with a work only for that work to rarely get updates. Most people don't have the attention span to care. I'll admit, if I read a fic that's not finished and the writer takes one week to update, then one week, then THREE weeks, I probably will, like, forget about it. That's just life.

The best thing you can do is schedule. And again, this is the HARDEST thing to do, because it holds the creator to a deadline. Most people who create in fandoms don't want that kind of pressure—and that's fine. I go back and forth on when I have scheduled releases and when I don't, depending on what I'm aiming to do. But if you to retain your audience, telling them that you will update a work regularly on such and such a day and such and such a time, it creates something for them to remember. If they're invested in your work, they will think, "oh, it's Friday, that means such and such is coming out with something new." But, with that in mind, you also have to commit to a schedule that people will remain invested in. Which basically means you can't put things out more than a week away from each other, unless you're really, really famous, lol. If I told people I was going to go on a two week update schedule, I would lose most of my audience. But a week is long enough for people to both still remember and anticipate. That's just how the scheduling of the world works. And if you're an artist that's working on a big project, then you have to share progress, or pieces of what you're doing on a regular basis. That's what generates "buzz" and keeps you relevant. And, yeah, that's a really hard schedule to commit to, because it's a lot of work. BUT this consistency is where you see people being successful. Popular youtubers may not have gained their popularity by being consistent, but most sure do retain it that way. And again, there are outlying exceptions, but they generally ARE exceptions.

Speaking of hard work, here's probably the second hardest thing to accomplish—you have to be prolific. Especially as a writer. You have to write A LOT if you want to gain an audience. And yeah, that means you have to work, a lot. I love my work, so I enjoy that "grind," and I also have developed a lot of strategies to work around writer's block and every other obstacle that tends to catch people up. I work in a very professional manner—I do outlines, and drafts, and plan. I do a lot of stuff that people who do this kind of thing for fun can't be bothered with (and that's fine), but that's because I find it to be what works best in creating an efficient environment. I'm also very, very NOT lazy, lol. I was raised in an environment where you have to work for everything that you want. My parents didn't buy me my first computer, or snowboard, or what have you. We were tight on money and if I wanted something, they couldn't help me—I had to get that shit on my own. And I also grew up on a farm, where hard work was a staple of how you did things. You did things the right way, even if it was the hard way. You can't cut corners and it's the same with this. If you want it, you have to actually do the work, that's it. Some people get lucky with popularity, most don't. Most famous actors didn't become well-known off their first efforts, they had to keep trying and keep working and then they have to continue to do that to stay relevant. So if that doesn't sound great to you, then you might want to not focus on your audience and just create because you enjoy it, lol. Sometimes that's what I do too, when I don't wanna deal with the pressure.

Moving on, here's another point that nobody is going to like. Simply put, you also have to be good at what you do. I think some people don't realize that I've been writing fic for over fifteen years. I currently have nearly 2 millions words worth of fics on AO3 and that doesn't include a majority of the stuff I've ever written. I practice A LOT. I write every day. And I'll tell ya, when I started out in middle school, my stuff was not good. But I worked hard, I ignored the hate, and I kept going. That is the only way you will ever get better at anything. There's no quick way to become a better writer, or artist. And a vast majority of people are only going to pay attention to your stuff if it's quality work. Getting to that point is a process, on top of then creating stuff that fits into popular molds. Not only am I good at what I do (and I don't care how arrogant that sounds—I've worked my ass off), but when it comes to fandoms, I rarely write "rare pairs" and "crack ships." Generally, if it's popular, that's where I am. That makes a big difference and I honestly don't have sympathy for people who write rare pairs and such and then complain about lack of engagement. You knew what you were getting into (it's mostly the Miraculous fandom that gave me this bitterness). If you're not writing what people WANT to read, then your audience is simply going to be smaller. And that audience doesn't owe you their attention, no matter how frustrating it is or how good your work is. I could be the best writer in the world, but if I'm writing RekixCherry fic, I have nobody to blame but myself when nobody reads it. BUT if that's your passion, and writing a certain unpopular thing makes you happy, then, again, you need to not be concerned with traction and your audience.

The last point I'll make is that it matters HOW you present yourself online. A good chunk of the well-known creators in any fandom are, simply put, older people. And those that aren't, and are able to connect with those older creators, have generally created a bubble around themselves of maturity and, like, of being nice, lol. A lot of creators are skittish these days, and if you're an asshole (anti) or fight a lot over stupid shit, you may get a bigger audience, but you will isolate yourself from other creators. And this is important because oftentimes it is your exposure to other creators that will get your work circulating. The reason I got popular in the ML fandom? I wrote a short angst fic and a really popular artist shared it/talked about it and the rest was history. But if I'd had a habit of being an asshole, probably wouldn't have happened. And, granted, I'm not saying don't voice your opinions, but if you're loud all the time, it does turn people off. Especially creators because they are oftentimes the ones being attacked. They don't want to pull more of that negative bullshit into their lives. I'll admit, when I was in the ML fandom, I was down for a fight, but then that's what people came to expect, and it probably did turn others off, and then when I didn't fight, or didn't think the way my audience thought I should, it, again, turned people off. It's really not worth it unless being that type of person IS your platform.

So, that's all the advice I can give, I suppose. And even if you do all this stuff, that still doesn't mean you're going to be popular. At the end of the day, the thing that I stick to is this—I do what I want, I love what I do, and I work hard. If I'm in a position to worry about all that other stuff, then sure, I do, but otherwise… There's no easy way to become popular and, quite frankly, it's better to just "live" working hard and being a decent person than it is to focus on all this bullshit. I've created a working environment where I function within these "points" quite naturally, so it's not something I think about (except for schedules, lol). Sometimes I get popular in fandoms, sometimes I don't. At the end of the day, it comes down to how much work you're willing to do, because you will always be giving more than you are getting back, so you have to at least enjoy what you're doing.

Seriously, just do it because you love it. And if the pressure of everything above is something you don't love (I like a good, high pressure situation, lol), then don't do it that way—it's not worth the grief.

#skaylanphear replies #anonymous

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laceymorganwrites · 4 years ago

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HQ love letters: Kunimi

Word count: 1,365

Pairing: Kunimi x reader

Warnings: swearing, mentions of blood (in a movie context), ooc Kunimi (sowwy, I rlly tried my best >.<)

Summary: Kunimi wasn´t easy to read, but maybe he also wasn´t that difficult to understand, you just needed the chance and patience. Centered around Valentine´s Day find out how you met and how your relationship progressed

Taglist: @miyaniacs @prettyforpapiiwa my aries besites 🥺

A/N: I am so excited to be able to finally post this!!!! The collab (by lovely @luna-in-luv <333) was so much fun, I loved the concept!!!

to @samthegirlnextdoor: I am so sorry, I am so bad at writing for Kunimi but I really tried my best (even asked my aries friends to help me characterize him hehe) and well, I am also sorry for not getting to know you better, sadly I wasn´t really in a good place mentally, but thankfully I´m doing better now. I hope you enjoy, it was so much fun writing for you and happy Valentine´s Day!!

Kunimi always seemed lazy and uncaring. He was always the type to do the things he needed to, but not more. He always got done just at the right time, using every minute he could get, so that he didn´t need to do extra work.

People never really paid him any mind, he was just the kind of man you didn´t really get to see a lot since he was always the first one to leave just as the class was done.

People seldom saw him for what he really was: clever.

They never cared to get to know him better than the man he presented himself as.

Honestly you couldn´t blame them.

Kunimi could be quite mean sometimes, he made snarky and sassy remarks that were overall annoying and didn´t really mind if he hurt people with it.

At least it seemed that way. He seemed like a guy you didn´t want to get to know.

Sure, he was rather quiet and stayed to himself and only had a small circle of close friends, making it hard for others to see through it.

But then again, Kunimi never was one to make any efforts with people he didn´t know.

It intrigued you more than you liked to admit.

He wasn´t the type of guy you would notice immediately, but he certainly made you curious.

You two had the same classes and sat next to each other and you thought you got along quite well.

Especially when you had to do presentations and other projects together.

Kunimi wasn´t an asshole and did his part of the work. He always did.

However it was quite strange, you never met someone like him. From the outside he would seem lazy, like he didn´t care about anything.

Maybe that was true, but not in the extent you would think. Perhaps you were biased and blind though.

Kunimi and you got done with your work quickly all the time and you always started a conversation with him because you wanted to get to know him better.

You never thought that you´d get along that well with him. Kunimi was really funny and noticed things most people didn´t, he was empathetic in his own way which made him incredibly charming.

You didn´t have any other choice than to fall for him.

He always indulged you. Though that was out of politeness rather than of actual fondness. At least that´s what Kunimi told himself.

He wasn´t one to crush on people, it was pointless and a waste of time. More than anything it was such a nuisance, he didn´t want to deal with it.

So he pretended he didn´t feel anything more for you.

His plan backfired though. Apparently it was painfully obvious that he had feelings for you, so his friends told him. Though he just told them to fuck off like always.

“Hey, you got a minute?” you stopped him in his tracks one particular day after class. You were so annoying when you did that, when you wanted to talk to him and stopped him from going home. And yet he let you.

“Make it quick” he told you, but his voice was way too soft to make it sound annoyed or threatening.

“Wanna be my Valentine´s?” you grinned.

You might as well, you thought.

Kunimi was quite surprised, not really knowing how to react. Sure he liked you well enough, but love was way too complicated for him, it sounded like such a drag. But it was Valentine´s Day, he didn´t want to be the asshole that stood you up, so naturally he agreed, though not really expecting anything.

Maybe that was why he was so hyper aware of his own feelings, not knowing what to do when you smiled at him like that, asking him if he was feeling well or if you were boring him, if you just misunderstood him.

Looking back on the fact that he just ditched you then and there to rush to his friends to ask for advice, it was funny.

You could laugh about it one year later but it really wasn´t the best move on his part.

Luckily that was just the mere beginning of your relationship.

This time he would do it right.

Kunimi learned the importance of occasional romance with you, you taught him how to be open about his emotions, that it was fine, how you were feeling the same thing.

Somehow love didn´t seem so scary anymore with you. You made him feel safe and secure.

Sadly the time around Valentine´s was always stressful since it was when exams were being written.

However he used it to his advantage.

He knew that you were studying at home and would come around when you were done. You also told him you´d text him when you would get ready.

That left him with enough time to prepare everything.

It was your anniversary after all and he was pretty sure you thought he forgot about it.

He couldn´t help but smile at that thought, he hoped you´d like the surprise.

Kunimi went out of his way to decorate his place with your favorite flowers, he even invited Kindaichi to help him cook your favorite meal.

While Kindaichi was in the kitchen, Kunimi checked everything and then rushed to the nearest convenience store to get your favorite snacks and drinks.

He had planned out everything perfectly, though of course it didn´t seem that way. Kunimi wasn´t one to seem like he planned anything, it would just ruin his lazy reputation.

Though in all honesty, he couldn´t be lazy without planning.

And for you, everything needed to be perfect, there was no other way.

It wasn´t only to make up for his stupidity in the year prior, no, he just simply couldn´t fuck up and be lazy today.

Those three words were way too important.

And so as he returned, he bid goodbye to Kindaichi who wished him luck. Something he only snorted at, who´d need luck in uttering words? It wasn´t like he would lose his voice all of a sudden, though he might as well.

As soon as you stepped through the door it was like history repeated itself.

But he wouldn´t let it this time, he wouldn´t let himself run away.

“Fuck, you´re beautiful….” he husked, almost sounding out of breath.

You closed the door behind you and couldn´t hold back a chuckle, though you were quite surprised at the prepared couch and table for a movie night.

“Um, thanks? Did you get knocked on the head, babe? I´m literally not wearing anything special” you said, looking around.

Kunimi seemed nervous for some reason, but you couldn´t quite pinpoint why.

“So what? Who says you need to wear something special to be beautiful? That´s the dumbest shit I heard all day” he smirked and sat down on the couch with you, immediately laying an arm around you and starting one of those dumb movies you only watched to make fun of the people in it.

“Oh my god, you´re so stupid, of course you´re gonna die first….” you groaned, laughing at the unrealistic scream and spurt of blood in the bad slasher movie on screen.

Meanwhile Kunimi looked at you as if you were his whole world, because you were. How did he get so lucky? To have such a work of art sitting next to him who didn´t think that much of themselves? How much of a saint was he in his last life to get to be such an asshole in this one? To get to tell you how incredible you were every day? He couldn´t comprehend it in the slightest.

And yet you were here with him, in his arms, feeling so comfortable in his presence.

He was getting way too soft and you were the sole reason.

“How can you be so perfect? Fuck I love you” he mumbled, not realizing what he just said.

“Huh? What was that, babe?” you asked, turning to face him.

“I said I love you, idiot” he repeated himself, louder this time.

Before he could regret and realize his words though, your lips were already on his.

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creativeskullcreations · 4 years ago

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Outside chapter 25: What Comes Next

And here it is, the final chapter. It's been a wild ride, y'all, but more on that in the next chapter. Also can anyone guess who the sequel will involve? There's a hint, though it'll be a while before I get to it.

Stacy chopped the vegetables for the upcoming stir-fry as Scout watched from the other side of the sink. Will was working on measuring out the rice, hopeful that this time it would be the right amount. Scout hoped for another rice-explosion.

Rice cooker started, Will washed his hands and headed down into the basement. Nick and Riley sat in cages along the back wall, tied up and gagged. Riley glared at him as he approached, but Nick stared into space, unmoving and unseeing. Will came up to the cage and poked the Puppet's face with a pen, and on finding no reaction took the artist out of his cage, manually closing his eyes as he went.

Will laid the body on the table, untying him an removing the gag before wrapping him up like a mummy. Wrapped up in fabric and bound with silver infused rope, he was laid gently into a velvet lined box, that was closed and locked up tight with a key and code. It was placed on top of the box that held Mortimer, right next to the one that held Daisy. Right next to the many other boxes lining the wall.

Will finished checking in with the other dolls and toys, finding no change or escape attempts. He went to leave, but stopped first to look at Riley. She was obviously tired, no longer struggling against the ropes that bound her. Instead she opted to give a death glare, which he returned with a steady stare.

"You're next, you know." He told her quietly. "Don't worry, you won't get a different treatment from the others." She just glared harder, and he went back upstairs, heading back for the kitchen.

"Nick's gone dormant." He told Stacy quietly as she cooked the vegetables and rice in a pan. She frowned and nodded, but didn't reply beyond that. Scout was on the table, messing with the forks, and neither of them wanted to bring it to her attention. As he went on to stop the Puppet from her tower building, Stacy breathed a sigh of relief.

'Three down, just one more left.' She sighed in relief as she scooped the food onto four plates. 'It's almost over, then.' She set them up on the table while Will went off to find Canon. He returned quickly, no Puppet in sight.

"Yeah she's still up there, and not coming back down. But she did yell at me to go away this time, so I think we're making progress." He said, taking a seat. Stacy dumped the food that would've been Canon's into a tupperware before taking her own seat.

Scout, true to form, had already started stuffing her face. She stopped briefly, swallowing her mouthful with some difficulty. "I don't even know why you fucking bother. If she wants to be miserable, let her be miserable. Better than having her bothering me all the time." Another scoop of rice went into her mouth. "Why are we eating this again? It's fucking gross."

"We have to have at least two nights where we eat real food." Stacy told her. "It's healthy."

"It's. Gross." Scout repeated. "Didn't you make a cake? Where is it?"

"Cake comes after dinner. Eat your rice." Will told her. And, with some grumbling, the Puppet continued to shovel the stir-fry into her mouth.

"My Dad wants me to come home for Thanksgiving." Stacy said, after a few minutes of silent eating. "I think I should probably go this time, rather than just call."

"Might be a good idea." Will agreed. "Doesn't Danny need to, uh, do something anyways?"

"That's another reason I'm going. And why Scout is coming too."

"What? Ew no I don't wanna go." She dropped down into the chair behind her. "I like this house."

"It's just for a few days. Besides, I want you to meet my brother. It's important."

"How important? Also isn't he the one who can't hear? That's weird." Scout commented, peering over the edge of the table like some sort of gremlin.

"Yes, and yes he is weird but not because he's deaf." A pause, as Stacy realized something. "So don't tell him that that's why he's weird."

The two stared at each other, long enough that Will sighed and reached over to pull the Puppet back up onto the table. "Finish your food so we can get to the cake already." He grumbled, stabbing into a larger piece of carrot. "Also has Lisa gotten back to you on that project she's working?"

"Not yet, but apparently it's been more difficult than she thought. Neither Stitch or Bonzai are cooperating, and Scout doesn't even want to know what she's working on." Stacy side-eyed her Puppet, who glared right back.

"I want no part of that crazy bitch's plans!" She insisted, and was met with two sighs.

"You don't even know what it is." Will pointed out, and got a handful of rice in the face for his trouble.

"I don't fucking care. It involves fabric, and I don't fucking trust her!" She went to grab another handful of rice, only to find her plate gone, and Stacy halfway to the sink with it and the other two plates.

"Who wants some cake?" She asked with false cheer, holding the pan and a knife up. Scout cheered, and Will just sighed, though with a small smile.

-----

Lisa sighed heavily, pulling at her hair as she stared down at her notes. Nothing seemed to be working, though not like she could even test her theories with nobody cooperating with her. Even Stitch, who had agreed to help, and been swayed into not helping by Bonzai.

Finally, she stood and swept the notes into a folder, shelving it for the time being. She had classes to plan for next year, and should probably get on that. She grabbed a fresh notebook and opened it up. 'I wonder is Stitch would be willing to come with a few days out of the week.' She thought as she started on the plans. 'She's not that creepy, and isn't as loud as the others. And kids always love a Puppet.'

A light smile crossed her face as she thought of vague scenarios and sketched in small notes on where the Puppet could fit. She wasn't sure if her supervisor would even allow it, but it was nice to fantasize. Unfortunately, her fantasies were soon broken by a loud crash from the living room.

'Oh what did those three do now?" She stood and left her study, to find the little train Mason had set up crashed into a wall. Her roommate was doubled over laughing behind a camera, while Stitch and Bonzai were arguing. She leaned against the wall, watching the scene.

"I hope you got some good shots, cause it's time to clean this up." She told them, and instantly he sobered up.

"Aw, come on Lees, they love the train. Just look!" He pointed to the two Puppets, of which Stitch was actively strangling her brother.

"It looks like they're trying to kill each other." She leaned down, scooping the Puppets into her arms. "Besides it's gonna be time for bed soon, and I don't want to trip over this again tomorrow morning."

"Ugh, fine." He pulled his phone out and snapped some pics so he could put it back together later. He then started grabbing track pieces and putting them into a nearby bin. Bonzai let out his own groan, just now noticing what was going on.

"Hey wait don't put it away!" He struggled, but couldn't break Lisa's hold on him. "I wasn't done with that! Stop!"

"Ah but my Host has spoken. You are done with it." Stitch intoned smugly, to be met with a hard glare. He was ignored as Lisa carried them to what had been a guest room, but was now set up as their room. Not much had really changed about it, save for there being more toys and some kids' books around. It was mostly a temporary place for them, that had become permanent.

"You guys really gotta clean this place up." The blonde muttered as she stepped over things to put them in the bed. Bonzai tried to escape the second he was let go, but Lisa grabbed him again and almost forcibly tucked him in beside his sister. He crossed his arms and sulked while Stitch looked far too happy to be fussed over like that.

"Glad you're enjoying this humiliation." He muttered.

"It is only humiliating if you dislike such actions." Stitch whispered back as she watched her Host put away some of their things. "Personally, I feel like this was an optimal outcome. Look at her, cleaning for us."

"Well I wasn't done playing with Mason." He grumbled, just loud enough that Lisa heard.

"What were you guys doing, anyways. I saw Mason had his camera set up." She said, coming to sit down on the bed with them.

"We were making a movie! With fun action sequences and a train chase!" Bonzai told her excitedly. "It was totally awesome!"

"He told us he would put it on the internet when he was finished." Stitch told her, and Lisa frowned briefly before covering it up.

"That sounds so cool!" She said. "I can't wait to watch the finished thing. I bet it's gonna be awesome!"

"Hell yeah it is!" Bonzai agreed, and received a small pat on the head for it. He quickly brushed her hand away while she gave Stitch an identical pat, then stood to leave. Turning the light off as she went, she made sure the door was tightly shut before heading back to the living room.

She took a deep breath. "You're going to put them on YouTube?!" She whisper-shouted with a squeak.

"Uh, yeah? I'm not gonna make a whole ass movie just to let it sit in the camera." Mason told her, putting the last of the track pieces in the box.

"You can't do that! What if somebody sees? Oh man we're gonna get in so much trouble!"

"Lisa, relax. Stacy made a whole TikTok account for Scout, and nothing's happened to them." He pointed out.

"That's Stacy though! She has, like, supernatural luck or something! We're gonna get caught and they'll be taken away!"

"Look, Lisa, it'll be fine. And besides, the movie's not done yet. There's plenty of time to see if Scout gets caught because of TikTok or not." He grinned, which faded at the hard look Lisa was giving him.

"If anything happens to anyone because you put that video on YouTube, you're dead." She told him, but he just grinned back.

"Fair enough." He said. "But don't worry so much. It'll be fine, I'm sure of it!"

-----

Sammy walked into his half-dark apartment, not bothering to turn on any other lights. His backpack fell to the floor with a heavy thump as he wandered into the kitchen for a soda from the fridge. Drink gotten, he opened it up as he wandered into the living room, sitting on the couch and lighting up a joint.

He blew out a mouthful of smoke, barely noticing as Bit appeared on the couch. She crawled over to lay her head in his lap, letting out small coughs occasionally. He stroked her hair absentmindedly, slowing down as his mind drifted with the smoke.

"You need to stop doing that." Bit mumbled, coughing again as Sammy finally passed into a weed fueled haze. She got no reply, so she sighed unhappily.

She'd been expecting something... more with Sammy once they got back. And her siblings seemed to have gotten that, even if Canon was being a weird bitch about it. But all she got was a Host that left her alone for days at a time, only to come home and smoke himself into oblivion. And then he'd leave again the very next morning.

He didn't talk or play with her like the other Hosts did with her siblings. It was almost enough to bring her to tears when she was left alone in the dark apartment. Almost. She never actually cried from it(not like she'd admit it, anyways).

She was tired of the taste and stench of the smoke, however. It made her cough, and smelled worse than anything in the Studio. She wished he could get through one day without smoking. She knew that the next time they all met up, she was going to stink.

-----

Stacy brushed her hair, sitting on the bed next to Scout, who was deep into playing an old Gameboy that had been found in a box. As soon as her hair had been tied back into a braid, she lifted the Puppet into her lap and gave her hair a few quick strokes with the brush.

"Okay, it's bedtime now. Save the game and turn it off." Stacy said, putting the brush away. She unhooked her prosthetic and set it down beside the bed, in easy reach for the next morning.

"Can't save can't pause gotta keep playing." Scout mumbled. Her Host sighed before grabbing the game and pausing it, then plugging it into the charger on the side-table. The Puppet reached for it, but was held in place as Stacy turned off the light and laid down.

"Bedtime is now, Scout. Will's already asleep." She muttered as she settled down, and Scout finally stopped fighting it. Stacy would go limp soon enough, anyways, and then Scout could go back to playing.

And, just as predicted, once Stacy was fully asleep it was easy to squirm out of her loose grasp and grab the Gameboy. She settled into the corner of the room to play, when she noticed a light go by the open door.

Too low to the ground to be anything but Canon, Scout eased through the gap between the door and door-frame. She followed her eldest sister to the kitchen, just in time to see her pull the tupperware of gross rice out of the fridge. It landed on the floor with a thump and she pulled the lid off to shove the cold leftovers into her mouth.

"You know that tastes better warm, right?" Scout asked, and Canon jumped, then hunched over her food and glared at her sister.

"Shut up and go back to your Host!" She hissed before chomping down on another mouthful of food. Hunger satisfied for now, she put the lid back on and hefted the container back into the fridge. She then closed the door, plunging the kitchen back into darkness.

"C'mon Canon, Will's worried about you. I think." Scout scratched her head. "It's honestly hard to tell with him sometimes."

"I. Don't. Care." Canon said simply, pushing past Scout in order to get back to her hiding place.

"But he's your Host!" The elder sister paused, leaving Scout feeling safe to continue. "Everyone else likes their Hosts! Did... did something happen or-"

"Just because the rest of you are happy to be pets doesn't mean I am." She stated. "They'll all get bored of you eventually, so don't drag me into your delusions." And then she vanished, leaving Scout with a rebuttal dying on her lips.

"Well, fine then! Be a bitch, see if I care!" She grumbled as she made her way back to the bedroom in the dark. She Jumped onto the bed, crawling under the blanket and up against Stacy.

"We're not fucking pets." Scout muttered. "They care about us. Stacy cares about me. I know she does." She sniffed, burying her face under the covers. "Why does she have to be such a bitch about it?"

-----

Somewhere far away, in a different, rainy city, sat a small building. Out of that building, through the boards covering the door, a tiny figure made of wood squeezed out, dragging an envelope with him. Holding it over his head, he raced to the nearby mailbox sitting at the corner. It took some work, but he was able to climb up and stuff the letter he was carrying inside.

And just in time, too, as a flash of lightning showed a stark white figure about the size of a child standing just inside the doorway. Thin strings wormed their way out through the boards, attaching themselves to the puppet's limbs. It screamed, a high-pitched, sharp sound as he was dragged back inside.

The rain continued to fall as the city slept on, completely unaware.

#outside #hello puppets #fanfiction #scout #canon #stitch #bonzai #bit #riley ruckuc #nick nack #stacy stein #will carson #lisa montgamery #mason kamiya #sammy davis

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musings-from-mars · 4 years ago

Note

I absolutely need part 3 of this

Freelance Love Triangle AU - part 3

A lot could be said about Robyn Hill, managing publisher of Urban Valean. A lot of good could be said, that is. Blake had done work for a few other publications in the past, and the managers there were not as...receptive? Robyn wasn’t an asshole to her subordinates, which was a positive mark that she did not share with those in similar positions elsewhere.

Which is why when Blake went to her office with Cinder and Ruby to pitch their idea for a big feature in the next edition, she was confident Robyn would be onboard. And she wasn’t disappointed.

“This is the kinda shit I want, and you two always seem to step up,” Robyn praised Blake and Cinder after they finished their pitch. She then closed Ruby’s folder and handed it back to her. “And I think this is the perfect project for you, Ruby. We’re throwing you into the deep end, but I’m sure you can swim just fine.”

Ruby nodded. “Yes I can! I...” She blushed. “That was figurative and I answered like it wasn’t, I’ll shush now.”

I want. To kiss her? Blake thought. So bad???

Robyn chuckled, then stood to her feet and clapped her hands. “However! If I’m going to give you three a feature in the next issue, I’m going to keep close tabs on your progress. I want drafts upon drafts, I want a written outline on how you three plan to allocate, and I want finals on all the writings and photos well in advance of the deadline.” She grinned and shrugged. “High risk, high reward, right?”

“It’s hardly a risk, ma’am,” Cinder insisted with a confident nod. “We’re more than capable.”

Blake noticed that Cinder really wanted to say she was more than capable but wanted to sound more like a team player for Robyn. Blake was going to keep an eye on her...

“I like the confidence, Cinder, but I care about results, okay? Neither of you have done a collab like this before, and Ruby literally just got here. Prove me right before you tell me I’m right,” Robyn said, making eye contact with the three women each in quick succession. “Also, don’t call me ma’am.”

“Yes, Robyn,” Ruby said with a smile.

Robyn snapped her fingers and pointed at her. “I adore you. Now, get out there! Follow up with me next week, okay?”

~~~

First stop was the gallery downtown. It was a thirty minute walk from the office, but the three took it as a chance to talk and propose ideas. Cinder was already rambling about the gallery, the stuff she’d written about individual pieces and the overall layout. Again, it all sounded like fluff to Blake without info about the art itself, or the organizer, or the artists, but Cinder could probably sell shampoo to a bald person, just as she was selling her and Blake on the gallery.

“It sounds really cool!” Ruby admitted. She walked with a pep in her step down the sidewalk with them, always keeping a couple steps ahead of them as if she could only control her pace to a certain degree. She skipped and walked backwards and sideways whenever she wanted to talk to them, like a haphazard game of hop scotch. It was adorable, especially with how her skirt would twirl and flare with each turn and twist.

“It does,” Blake admitted, solely because she wanted to agree with Ruby. Ruby’s smile was a very agreeable one. Blake then blushed and glanced at Cinder, who gave her some smug side eye. “The gallery, I mean. The gallery sounds cool.”

Cinder rolled her eye and turned her gaze back to Ruby. “I already have ideas for some shots you could take, like the main entrance, this one bronze statue in the center of the gallery...”

Ruby grinned and nodded. “I can’t wait to see it. Gosh, I hope there’s enough room on my camera, I feel like I’ll get a little shutter happy.”

“Shutter happy?” Cinder asked with a chuckle.

“I take more pics than a need to, a lot,” Ruby admitted. “And then I forget to upload them, and then my camera fills up, and it’s always on the day I forget my laptop, or my USB cord...” She groaned and awkwardly took her backpack off while still walking backward-sideways. “Lemme double check that I have everything. My flat is near here so if I don’t, I can...” She then let her shoulder’s slouch. “My laptop is still in the microwave.”

“Your laptop is in your what?” Blake asked incredulously.

“I put it there so I don’t forget it!” Ruby explained defensively. “I always have these instant egg bowl things every morning, so every time I open my microwave to cook one, it’s there, that way I’m guaranteed not to forget it.”

“But you did forget it,” Cinder said, her voice almost taking a teasing tone.

“Because I was in a hurry this morning,” Ruby said. “I wanted to get to the office early, so I skipped breakfast and left my laptop in the microwave.”

“Well, at least you said your flat was nearby, right?” Blake asked, looking around at the nearby buildings. “Wanna stop by and grab it?”

Ruby nodded, turning away from them and looking around. “Yeah. I’ll be quick, okay?”

“There’s really no rush,” Cinder told her. “We have all evening—”

Before Cinder could finish her statement, Ruby was already running across the street. The traffic wasn’t super busy, but still, that was ill-advised. “H-Hey!” Blake called after Ruby. “Be careful!” Ruby didn’t seem to hear, though. At least she made it to the other side of the road, then entered a staircase that led up to a few apartments above a pizza shop/microbrewery.

Cinder scoffed. “Chaotic one, isn’t she?”

Blake turned and glared at her for a moment. “Cinder, tone it down, will you?”

“Tone what down?” She asked.

“Your thing for her is obvious,” Blake accused.

“Hm. Jealous much?”

Blake opened her mouth to deny it, then closed her mouth when she realized how obvious of a lie that would’ve been. She shook her head and huffed a scoff. “This is going to be a strictly professional collab, okay? If you make this too personal between you and Ruby, Robyn will pop a blood vessel.”

“You want her all to yourself, don’t you~?”

Blake made an awkward grunt, surprised at the insinuation. She could feel her face light up with heat. “That! That’s what I’m talking about. None of that.”

“You’re not denying it.”

“It makes no difference,” Blake told her, taking a deep breath to steady herself. “Listen, I’ll admit it. She’s cute, and funny, and...has a pretty smile, but none of that matters right now!” She shook her head and looked down at the sidewalk, crossing her arms. “We’re project partners, and that’s the extent of our relationship. For now.”

“‘For now,’” Cinder mocked with delight.

“I’m about to pop a blood vessel, too,” Blake grumbled.

#freelance love triangle au #rwby #pawling petals #ruby rose #blake belladonna #cinder fall #robyn hill #drabble

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dalamjisung · 4 years ago

Text

happy ❀ kim seokjin

genre: angst, fluffy ending

word count: 10k~

pairing: reader x kim seokjin

description: being happy is the goal; but what to do when you don’t really know what that means? Maybe Jin can help...

Living in your neighborhood means quiet nights in, with nothing but the sound of light traffic and whispered conversations. It’s unique, and safe, and exactly what you were looking for three years ago, when you first moved-in; but now… now you miss some of that youthful excitement that usually came with late night hangouts and loud bustling streets. With work, and, well, living, you admit it’s been hard– no time for anything else but sleep and work some more. Being a worker on the rise with one of the most prominent Advertisement companies around surely compensates the constant tiredness, but you no longer seem to have a social life. You stopped running in the mornings, and taking late night walks at the park. You no longer have time to enjoy the street market on the weekends or watch a few episodes of Criminal Minds on Sunday. It’s been so long you did something just for you that you barely remember the rewarding feeling of self-care.

It is on a Monday morning– or maybe it’s actually Tuesday,– that you notice a suspicious line of people on the sidewalk, blocking your car’s door. You weave through them to get in and it hits you as you close the door, the waft of gingerbread and sugar smell coming from the newly open store where all the people seem to be going into. You roll your eyes in annoyance, huffing irritably as you start you car and hurry to work, where you have an early meeting with potential clients and this is your chance to show your boss you deserve the promotion more than anyone. You work long hours– possibly all hours, and yet you are still to be recognized for all you put into the company.

“Y/N!” Seojun shouts as soon as he sees you walking to the elevator. “Hey!” Laughing, you hold the doors open for him as he runs to catch it. The pile of paperwork in his hands almost covers his line of vision and you actually feel bad for your friend– the times that you had to run with thousands of files, and contracts, and scripts had been probably the worst times of your life. You never felt as powerless and unimportant as you did back then, when people used to ignore your name for the sake of getting their menial tasks done.

“Hey,” You smile, grabbing some files from him as the doors close. “How are you?”

“Stressed out,” He sighs, frowning. “Too much to do, very little time.”

The doors open just in time for you to help Seojun to his desk and then run to the meeting room. This is it; you are finally going to be able to pitch your idea you’ve been working on for almost a year. You are sure this project will take the agency to a whole other level, putting the newest talents under a spotlight for future investors, but when you tried to tell anyone about this before your promotion, they would just ignore you and wave you away so that you could do another daily, stupid chore. Maybe now, that you are finally growing in the company, you can finally bring the change that these young actors and entertainers need to really succeed in their career.

Everyone is there when you arrive and, smiling your best smile, you sit down next to the Head of Marketing. The director starts the meeting and people start presenting– profits, pitches, scouting,– and it takes time, but you patiently wait; you control yourself and wait for you turn… that never comes.

“Alright everyone!” The Director smiles and starts getting up. “That’s it for today. Great work, people!”

No one even smiles at you as they all leave, one by one, and it’s only when the room is fully empty, with the exception of you and your superior, that you speak up.

“Excuse me, sir,” You smile politely, frowning in confusion. “What just happened?”

“What do you mean, Y/N?”

“The project I’ve been working on for months, Sir,” You say, slowly trying to gather yourself. “I was supposed to present it today… you told me you’d talk to the Director.”

“Oh, that,” He chuckles and sits down again, facing you with arms crossed. You sigh, closing your eyes for just a second; it’s always been hard working under Mr. Nam– he’s always been known to treat his hoobaes unfairly, ignoring and mistreating them. “Don’t worry, I already told the Director about the idea. He already told us to go ahead with it and start getting a team ready.”

Well, that’s a surprise. You smile, trying to disguise your excitement.

“That’s amazing, Sir!” You gush. “When should I start getting things ready?”

“Ah, you see…” Mr. Nam sighs and gets up, getting a bit too close for comfort. His head levels down to yours and you whimper, a but scared with how this situation is quickly progressing. “You are not going to be a part of it. The Director put me in charge.”

“W-what?” Puffing out your chest, you try to put up a brave front, not ready to give up yet. “That’s not fair! I’ve been working on that for almost a year!”

“Yeah, but let’s be honest here, you’d never be able to deliver the result that is expected of this company, Ms. Y/N Y/L/N,” He murmurs, voice harsh and cold. “This project will take us to a whole new level, and you are barely a player here. Learn your place.”

“No, you can’t ju-“

“I can and I will,” He growls pointing a finger in your face. “We need this project, and we need someone who can properly lead it. Admit it, Y/N, you’re just a naive, scared little girl. I can’t have that ruining what is about to be our main source of profit for the next semester.”

“I’m just a… naive, scared little girl?” You whisper, frowning. “Why would you think you can do a better job with this project than I would? It’s my idea after all.”

“I have the experience,” He walks forward, forcing you against the wall. “I have the balls. What do you have? No one here knows you, Y/N. Now stop with this nonsense and go back to work.”

He smiles as he backs away eyeing you up and down.

“Marketing is all about criticism,” Mr. Nam says before leaving. “Better get used to it.”

Your knees give out just as Seojun walks in to prep the room for the next meeting.

“Y/N?” He runs to you, eyes wild and nervous. “Are you okay?”

You can barely catch enough breath to speak, lungs tightening and heart speeding just enough to make you feel dizzy.

“I’m perfect,” You respond robotically, looking up at your friend with a forced smile. Getting up, you smooth your clothes. “I have to run, but I’ll see you around, yeah?”

“What?” Seojun frowns. “I guess…”

Looking back, you can’t help and kindly look at the man that’s always worked hard and diligently.

“Oh, and Seojun?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t let these people undermine you,” You chuckle sadly. “You are an incredible person. And you are worth more than these assholes.”

————————————

In between grabbing your purse and running out of the building, you barely remember getting home. Or more precisely, your building’s door. Something within you didn’t allow you to walk in just yet, and knowing yourself, it wouldn’t allow you to do so until your dilemma was resolved.

Quit and possibly find a worse job but be overall happier and have to erase all those years of work and start all over again,

Stay, put up with it, and maybe get somewhere, someday.

“For fuck’s sake,” You mumble, turning around and starting to walk. It takes a couple of minutes but it hits you even stronger than before– the smell of butter and sugar. Although there is no more mile-long line, you take a peek inside; barely lit, empty, and… well, messy.

But the smell. Something about the smell of warm butter and sugar guides you in, first knocking on the glass, and then smiling kindly at the young man running back and forth, with barely no time to properly look at you, choosing to scream from the kitchen a ‘we’re closed!’

“Oh, it’s okay,” Your eyes follow his tall form as he moves around. “Sorry to bother yo– are you the only one working here?!”

That makes him stop. And look.

His dark eyes meet yours and goddammit you haven’t seen a man this attractive in a long time. His broad shoulder slump forward and he smiles tightly, nodding.

“Yeah,” He sighs, dropping the cleaning supplies. “I barely had time to organize a team before opening, so it’s just me for now…”

“Ah, I see,” You mumble, blushing at your shoes. “Sorry to intrude, anyw–“

“Wait,” He squints at you before smiling a bit wider. “Are you looking for a job? Is that why you’re asking?”

You blink at him. One time. Two times. Three, four–

“Yeah.”

“Really?!” He is clearly excited, dropping all cleaning supplies on a table and removing his apron to show a grey hoodie and blue jeans, and now you think he is much younger than he looked before. “That would be amazing, I’m not gonna lie, you would be saving me so much time!”

“Uh, what if I don’t have any experience working in a bakery?” You look at him, a bit curious about this… process.

“It doesn’t really matter,” He shrugs. “Do you wanna sit? I can make us some tea and get some cookies out while we talk.”

“Oh, sure,” With your mind still reeling from the previous happenings of the day, you would love some comforting food right now. And nothing else, Y/N. You don’t even know if you’ll quit, don’t get ahead of yourself.

“Okay,” He says and he puts down two mugs and a plate of warm cookies. “Just to make you feel more at ease, you’d never be in a position in which you’d need to make food. That is all me, and I don’t really intend of hiring kitchen staff. I just need someone to be the at the frontline– taking orders, waitressing, keeping track of storage and so on…”

“Well–“

“I understand if you don’t want to,” His head falls on his hands. “The pay is bare minimum, the work is exhausting and overwhelming, and honestly I never expected the bakery to do this well during opening weeks, but here we are, two days in, and I already think I can’t do this.”

Taking a second to allow him to catch his breath, you just stare with wide eyes. Are you willing? Are you really willing to go back to all of those insignificant tasks; fetching things for others, serving others, everything for others? But wouldn’t it be the same if you quit your job? Wouldn’t you have to start over anyways?

Start over… that sounds just what I need.

“Well, I was just going to ask for your name,” You gulp, trying to calm him down. “Boss.”

Kim Seokjin. Jin for short, or else he’ll think you’re angry at him. A peculiar man, you’d say, but it’s too late now– this man is your boss. As you lay down exhaustion washes over you, and you almost forget to set an alarm for five in the fucking morning. You can’t believe you did this but you are too tired to actually worry about the consequences of your impulsiveness.

You have somewhere to be tomorrow morning and you’ll be damned if you don’t give it your all.

————————————

“Good morning,” You smile as Jin opens the door for you, flour in his cheek and messy hair all over the place. “How long have you been here fore?”

“Spent the night here,” He yawns. “Needed to get the dough ready for today.”

“Uh, couldn’t you have done that like… now?” You shiver a bit from the cold but as soon as you step inside the bakery it’s almost as if nothing could bother you ever again. The warmth coming from the kitchen and the smell that overpowers everything else embraces you like it will never let you go. You feel safe and relaxed and maybe, just maybe, you’ll like it over here.

“I could,” He shrugs. “But then I wouldn’t have time to enjoy it. And the best part of this job is that I enjoy it, right?”

To say you are impressed is an understatement– the concept of enjoying your job is as foreign to you are the concept of liking your boss. All your life, you’ve strived for perfection, competence– working from the bottom up, making sure to give your all and a bit more, even to those small tasks you hate so much; and never have you heard a ‘thank you, Y/N,’ or a ‘great job!’ Blow after blow made you more apathetic, caring less about the quality, and more about the quantity. Observing your superiors taught you that the more you produced, the better, and you followed that by heart… until you came up with the project that was so swiftly stolen away from you. You had finally found something you are passionate about again! But, once again, it blew up on your face.

Naive, scared little girl. No one here knows you.

“I just want to be noticed,” You mumble to yourself, low enough that Jin makes out a noise, but doesn’t process the words.

He looks at you expectantly, and you smile, ignoring the situation. As he runs to the kitchen to look over his current batch of cookies, Jin multitasks and uses the time to show you around the place. There isn’t much, but even single corner of it is perfect. The kitchen– where you’ll never be unless supervised by him,– is simple and clean; the stock room is next to the back door, and you’ll need to check it every end of your shift; the front area, however, if your main stage– you have to be behind the counter at all times. The five tables pressed against the pink wall get full quite fast in the morning, and if the customers need anything, you need to be ready to serve.

“Sounds good?” Jin asks nervously, eyes looking straight into yours in case of any sing of regret.

“Sounds… just like my old job,” You smile tightly, shoulders sagging in defeat. I guess this is a beginning, although not quite a new one…

“You never told me what you did before,” Jin frowns. “Where did you use to work?”

You open your mind to tell him– you really do,– but suddenly it just doesn’t matter anymore. It never mattered to begin with, to be honest, and you don’t want to carry around that image of you anymore. No more office, no more thinking the bigger picture, no more a naive, scared, little girl. This is not you. It never was. And for some reason, you don’t want Jin, a man who gave you a chance on kindness alone, to see you like that.

“Just a very small place,” You lie. “Nothing important, really.”

“Well, I mean, you are working in a bakery, now,” He chuckles, completely forgetting his previous question. “It really must’ve been a crappy job.”

“The worst,” You nod, and putting on your apron, you get ready for the day.

It starts with a couple of customers; just a couple and their kids, and two high school girls on their way to class. Those are easy and simple and the smiles and ‘thank you’s catch you off guard, but you smile back and wish them a good day.

Then it gets a bit busier– large groups, old people, hipster teenagers,– and just like Jin warned you, the table get filled quickly, and whenever you could, you’d watch the people sitting down with their computers, doing work for school, or maybe applying for jobs. You look at two people sitting together, clearly getting to know each other, and you wonder if this is a first date or if they just met each other because of the lack of chairs in the place. You like this; a peaceful sensation running through you as you watch people smile because of their hot drinks, or humming in delight because of their pastries.

“Hi, excuse me?” Your eyes focus on the client in front of you, and you smile automatically. “Are you new?”

“I’m sorry?”

“Are you new here?” She laughs. “I’ve been coming here since day one…”

“Ah,” A bit embarrassed, you look down to the counter. “Yeah. Jin needed some help, and I needed a job, so…”

“Ah, I see,” She clicks her tongue and squints her eyes, and suddenly you are not that comfortable anymore. “Is he here? Jin?”

“Uh, yeah, he’s… he’s in the back, so…” You are not sure how to proceed.

“Call him for me.”

“Excuse me?” You mumble.

“I need to talk to him, so please, call him for me.”

Nodding, you slowly walk to the kitchen, where you see your boss humming happily to a song. You make sure to memorize this scene before delivering what you are sure is bad news.

“Uhm, excuse me, Jin,” You call softly, and he turns around in a second, eyes wide in surprise. “There is someone here for you.”

“What?” He frowns. “Who–“

“Very beautiful woman,” You sigh, tiredly rubbing your temples once you see the line growing on the other side of the counter. “I need to go back to the cashier, but she… demands to see you.”

“Ah, I know who it is,” His smile falters. “Be there in a sec.”

You go back to your rightful place behind the counter and you start the routine once again; order, payment, deliver. Order, payment, deliver. Order, payment–

“Hey again!”

You look up and surely, it is one of the elderly women you served this morning.

“Oh, hello again,” You chuckle, trying to remember he previous order. “Another latte?”

“Ah, you know it, dear,” She laughs, fishing her purse for change. “How have you been?”

“Busy,” You laugh. “It’s been a hell of a first day.”

“Oh, it’s your first day?” The woman asks. “I could barely tell! You are doing great, sweetie!”

“Thank you so much, ma’am,” You smile, giving her the drink. “It means a lot.”

“Oh, call me Minji, please,” She waves her hand in the air. “It’s nice to see that the people here are as amazing as the food. I’ll see you tomorrow, darling!”

Before you can answer, you hear a loud yelp coming from the back.

“Fuck you, Seokjin!”

“Sana!” Jin shouts, but it’s too late– she’s already out the door. “Damnit…”

“Hey, are you alright?” You whisper, trying understand what the fuck just happened.

“You should go back to the front,” His voice comes out cold and detached, and you shudder. “It’s full.”

“Jin–“

“It’s fine, Y/N,” He says. “Just go to the front, please.”

The rest of the day goes by in a second. You see people again, same ones you’ve seen hours before, and they recognize you. They call your name as if you’ve been friends for a long time, and they introduce themselves. Jinyoung, Seojun, Mina, Chan. You see them laugh, and chat, and joke around. You give them more coffee and food and they thank you, for doing nothing but your job.

It’s when Jin decides to take a break that you finally recognize the feeling blooming in your chest.

“Why are you smiling like that?” He asks, chuckling in confusion.

“I’m just happy.”

————————————

For weeks this goes on. You get a few messages and emails from people in your old office but you don’t even bother check them– you are happy. Waking up early is not a chore, and although it is still a bit hard leaving the bed with the morning dew nipping your skin, everything is okay once you get to the bakery. Apparently, you’ve been doing such a great job that Jin gave you the keys to the place, letting you open up the shop after you nagging him so much about his lack of sleep.

The first thing you do is cleaning. The place opens at 8AM sharp, meaning you have two hours to get everything done, so you start with the most important task. After everything is properly cleaned, you set Seokjin’s space in the kitchen. Because you’ve observed him working so much (and admired his beauty, you admit,) you’ve also learned where he likes his utensils placed, and how he likes to function when it’s just him working with so many orders and batches of food coming in and out of the kitchen. And finally, you make sure to organize the front space, putting in every table enough sugar and napkins to last the morning shift, at least.

“Good morning,” Jin mumbles, walking in without even throwing you a glance. His usual smile is gone and he goes straight to the kitchen. “What the– Y/N?”

You look up to see your boss frowning, leaning on the kitchen door.

“Did you mess with the stuff in the kitchen?”

At this point, you thought he knew– how else would his things be ready for him in the morning? However, you are not that confident this morning.

“Uh, yeah…?”

“Why?” His voice could cut through glass.

“Because I wanted to help?” Your voice dies down as the phrase reaches its end, suddenly feeling embarrassed and… inadequate. And you hate it; you haven’t felt like this since your days at the company.

“I told you to stay in the front,” He says in all seriousness, brows furrowed and angry. “I told you I don’t need anyone in the kitchen! Don’t mess with my things again, everything is out of place now!”

“But–“

“No!” He shouts, and it all comes back. Mr. Nam and his verbal attacks, the constant humiliation, all the holding in and breaking down, all the wasted energy, the wasted ideas, the wasted time. “Stay where you are supposed to.”

“Sure thing,” You seethe, understanding that there will always be frustrations in the workplace, but this… this feels oddly misplaced. “Just a question… is it any different than it usually is?”

“Of course,” He scoffs. “Or else I wouldn’t be complaining.”

“I see,” You nod. “Okay. Understood, boss. Never going in the kitchen again.”

You see the moment he falters, looking quizzically at you, as if he knows he missed something, but didn’t quite know what. Just like that, the day goes by in an agonizingly slow pace; clients coming in and out with not breaks, and you start to feel yourself getting more and more tired, having to handle the front of the bakery by yourself. For days you’ve been wondering how to bring this up, but you need help; at least one other person handling the cashier as you handle the orders and the tables.

Too late, you think, mindlessly steaming milk. He won’t listen to a word I say, now.

“Holy fucking shit!” You shout, feeling the boiling milk overflow right onto your hand. “Oh my god, mother–“

“Y/N!” Jin shouts from the kitchen door. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Sorry, Jin,” You gasp. “I just–“

“I don’t care! Get back to work without cussing in front of the customers.” And he is gone.

“Don’t worry, dear,” You turn around to see Minji at the counter. “He’s probably just stressed out.”

“I don’t see how’s that’s my fault,” You frown, trying to ignore the pain in your hand. “He’s been like that since yesterday…”

“Do you know why?”

“I can guess,” You mumble, thinking back to the woman that asked for him… Sana, you think is what he called her.

“Maybe you should talk to him,” Minji suggests while fishing for change. “You two are a team. He can’t function without you, and vice-versa.”

A team… I’ve never been part of a team, you think, waving her goodbye. Does he really need me?

Your confirmation is the sound of, what you assume to be, many baking trays falling to the ground, and a loud, loud “god-fucking-damnit” echoing in the suddenly very quiet bakery.

So you wait. You wait for the last costumer to leave to exhale, shoulders moving with each deep breath as you walk to the kitchen, stoping at the door. You see Jin, head low and defeated as he half-heartedly cleaned some utensils.

“Can we talk?”

You realize you sound slightly obnoxious, but you don’t care. This is something that has to be done.

“What’s up?” He sighs, hands massaging the side of his head. He looks exhausted and irritated, and for a second you pause– has he slept? Is he okay? He looks way more tired than before…

On one of the tables has tea and cookies and for a second it looks like the night you were hired, when you were feeling the lowest you’ve ever felt. And now here you are; chin high, heart beating bit too fast, and sweat dripping down your back. So stressed. You are stressed– and yet, happy.

“Seriously, Y/N, what’s up?” He sits down, taking a bite of a cookie. “I am not having a good day as it is and–“

“What is up with you?” You speak so fast that all Jin does is stare at you and blink. “Sorry. I don’t mean to be nosy, but I do worry about you. And the bakery. You’re being an asshole and it’s bothering the clients… and me. Mainly me. But the clients, too.”

“Did you just call me an asshole?” He mumbles, processing your words. “Y/N–“

“No, seriously, what is up with you?” You repeat. “Ever since that woman, Sana, came by, you–“

“That’s none of your business,” Jin spits out, getting up and marching to the kitchen. “Now get ready to close up.”

“That!” You shout, pointing at him. “You’re being that! Sana comes by, and suddenly I am your punching bag! Jin, we’re a team, for crying out loud! I am here for you– I am the one that spends the whole day with you, that eats with you, that organizes the fucking kitchen for you! And all you do I shout at me!”

“I’m your boss!” He shouts, and then he realizes he’s just proving your point. Clearing his throat, he continues. “What do you want from me?”

“I want my partner!” You scream, holding tears back. I’m your boss. Not partner; boss. “Whenever you needed me to stay late to clean, and help with the bills, and the accounting– I was here! Whenever you got cooped up in the kitchen ‘trying something new’ or ‘getting ready for tomorrow,�� I was by myself managing this whole place; clients, orders, mails, flowers, decorations–“

“She was there for me, too!” Jin screams, turning to face you and is he crying?! “Sana was there for me too…”

“What does that–“

“She was there and then she wasn’t,” He frowns, angrily marching closer to you. “Sana left me when things got tough. I was getting ready to open the bakery, money wasn’t coming in, no investors, no loans, and then, no Sana. So I’m sorry if I’m a bit skeptical about–“

Jin stops himself before he can finish, but it’s in his eyes.

“Me?” You whisper, hurt and disappointed. “Skeptical about me?”

“What do you want from me?” He begs, coming closer and closer, and you can’t help but back away.

“I was happy,” You whisper, hand covering your mouth in a failed attempt to hold everything in. Hold it in, hold it in, Y/N. For the last time, hold it in. “I was finally happy, Jin. I quit my job for this– for a chance to maybe, just maybe, make a difference. But I guess I never will.”

You take off your apron, and carefully leave it on the table, next to the now-cold-tea.

“At least before I got paid better…” You mumble as you walk to the door, and you honestly don’t think he’ll hear you; but Jin does, and before anything else hits, he’s already on attack mode.

“Then go back,” His hand slams down on the table and you freeze. “Go back to whatever job you were before and never told me about. That’s funny, Y/N– you want me to tell you everything, and yet you won’t tell even tell me what you used to do!”

“I used to work at JYPE,” You say, voice suddenly calm. You are so tired that you don’t even see the point of this anymore. “I was part of the Marketing team, and I used to make nine times more then what I make here. I used to think I was doing something important, Jin. But that was stupid.”

“What?” He gasps. “Why are you here?”

“Because after I quit JYPE, I though I’d never be the kind of person who’d let other walk all over her again,” Your voice is wavy and soft and small, and you just want to leave. Your eyes are fixed on his hands, balled into fists, and you are shaking. “I thought I’d never be screamed at or pointed at or scared again. So I stayed.”

“And now?” He asks, sitting down in defeat. “Why are you still here?”

“I don’t know,” You shrug. “I guess I should go. See you tomorrow.”

“You’re coming back?” There is hope in Jin’s voice and selfishly enough, it give you a bit of hope too.

“I still need a job,” You sniff, looking for your jacket.

“You can get a job anywhere,” He points out, but you choose to ignore it and walk out the door.

You were wrong, Minji, you think, sobbing your way home. I’m alone again.

————————————

“Good morning,” Jin greets you at the bakery door with two coffee cups in hand. Squinting, you manage to catch the Starbucks sign on the edge of the cup.

“That’s not–“

“Nope,” He pops his lips.

“What are you doing out here, Jin?” You sigh, shivering a bit. “It’s freezing.” “I wanted to get here before you,” He smiles a closed smile, trying to hide his uncomfortableness. “But I forgot I gave you my key before making a copy so you could get here to prep the place…”

“Ah, yes,” You fish the keys off, opening the place up for him. “Go in…”

Without even realizing your start your routine, completely ignoring your boss’s curious stare from where he is sitting on the counter. Apron is on, and you are ready; cleaning the place is the quickest chore, you mop the floor, and clean the tables, and make sure that Jin’s butt is not forever engraved in the counter where many people eat from.

“Jin, go sit on the tables,” You mumble, putting the chairs down and around the small sitting area.

And just as he gets up, coffees now lukewarm in his hands, you move on to the last and most important task– the kitchen. Still irritated from the last night, you march into the ‘forbidden area’ and do your best to silently move the utensils around without him noticing. Like it or not, Jin was still your boss, and angry or not, you still worried about him, so making sure that everything he needs is in order and in place for him to go through the day smoothly.

“What are you doing?” He asks, and you almost drop a mixing bowl on your feet.

“Oh, sorry,” Shaking your head as if to get out of a daze, you mumble to yourself something about never going back there again. “Force of habit…”

“Wait,” He runs into the kitchen, and then back to you, stoping your fidgeting hands from checking the cashier for the third time. On the outside you might’ve seem distracted and a bit too calm, but Jin had spent enough time with you to know when you are a complete mess of emotions. “You do this every morning?”

“Uh, yeah…” You clear your throat, trying to avoid the inevitable confrontation that is about to happen. “I know you asked me to stop, and-and I will! I promise!”

“No, you don’t have to, it’s… it’s perfect,” He breathes out. “Since when do you do this? And why?”

“Since you gave me the keys,” You mumble, nervously bitting your lips. “You weren’t getting any sleep and the kitchen was always a mess after you left and I thought that maybe leaving everything ready for the next morning would help… you know, be more efficient and stuff.”

“But–“

“I’ll stop!” You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. “I don’t want to fight, Jin. I’m still exhausted from yesterday and I just really want to get to work. Please.”

“No fighting,” He promises. “And I’m sorry. I was an idiot. Probably still am. I didn’t mean to shout at you or make you cry, I just–“

“I get it, Jin,” You walk to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Really. Let’s just forget it and go back to work, yeah? We have to open soon.”

“No, Y/N, wait,” Jin grabs your wrists and pulls you closer, holding you in a tight hug. “Let’s not open today.”

“What?!” You pull away and look at him with wide eyes.

“You were right!” He smiles, eyes crinkling in that way that lets you know that a particular fine batch of scones is coming out or that a new recipe is about to be added to the menu. So cute… “We’re a team! I can’t work without you, Y/N, or else I’d go insane. And no one could ever take care of the store the way you do– or make the clients happy, or– or take care of me! So I trust you; when you say you want to stay in the bakery, when you say we are a team, when you say you won’t leave… I trust you, I promise.”

“What is happening?” You whisper to yourself as Jin runs around gabbing his jacket and bag.

“We’re going to have a bonding day!” He announces, pushing you out and into the street. “Let’s go! I have an idea.”

Turns out Jin’s idea was having ramyun by the river, sitting on a cold bench, asking you questions about your life.

“I’m assuming you majored in Marketing?” He asks, chuckling to himself. “I still can’t believe you worked at JYPE… did you meet anyone famous? Oh! Did you meet GOT7?”

You roll your eyes playfully. “Well, you’re wrong, actually,” You smile to yourself. “I majored in Literature. Marketing is just where I ended up. And yes, I’ve met GOT7, and no, I don’t have their phone numbers, before you ask.”

He mumbles something about wanting to become best friends with Jackson and you take the time to look around; the sun was high in the sky, contrasting with the cold weather, illuminating everything around… particularly Jin. The sun hit on half of his face, and the last thing you remember is him talking about how BamBam is such a good rapper– the rest is lost in the air once you start noticing his sharp features. His hair covering his eyes, and his jawline, and just how beautiful his smile is. Objectively speaking, you know how handsome your boss is, and you know he knows it too, with his smirks and winks and air-kisses whenever he comes out of hiding in the kitchen and greets the customers properly. But this was the first time you actively noticed it… and enjoyed it.

“Y/N?” Jin calls, waving his hand in front of your face. “Y/N, are you listening to me?”

“Jin, what are we doing?” You sigh, smiling a bit. “What’s happening right now?”

“We’re bonding,” He answers softly. “I thought that was what you wanted?”

“I–“ You stop yourself, because, honestly, you have no idea what you want. “I– Yeah, I wanted to bond and-and get to know you better, I guess, but so far you told me nothing.”

“What do you mean?” Jin frowns and something in you stirs, making you ball your hands in fists to stop yourself from soothing his forehead. What is happening to me? “I told you a bunch of stuff. My favorite color, my college days, my childhood… I told you all about that.”

“Jin…” You sigh, looking right into his eyes, and disappointment is all you see in him; disappointment at himself for ever letting you down, to begin with. “You know that’s not what I mean.”

“I’m trying,” He pouts, eyes looking down at his hands in shame. “I’m doing my best, but I don’t like talking about that stuff… specially now that she’s back.”

“What does that mean?” You ask, hands covering his. Your thumb goes up and down and up and down on his palms and you feel all of the warmth and love that comes out of those hands. “You know what? I have an idea. Come with me.”

It takes you a while to convince him to let you drive, but with a little emotional speech he throws the keys at you and runs to passenger seat. The ride is quiet and you ask him to close his eyes once you start getting close.

“We’re almost there,” You tell him, a small smile on your face. “I’m going to open the window, just letting you know.”

Turning onto the street, you shimmy with glee upon seeing the bakery. Jin’s hair is flowing with the wind and you want to crack a joke about how he look like a model, but the very faint smell of sugar and cookies fill up the car, and you can see Jin sniffing the familiar smell. Although the bakery had been closed all day, the familiarity of the area is enough to bring back the smell that for weeks now has offered you comfort and happiness, and you sure that even with his eyes closed, Jin could feel the same.

“Are we–“

“Yeah.”

“Why?” He slowly opens his eyes, looking at you with such intensity that you can’t help but blush.

“Because this is your safe space,” You mumble, parking and turning off the car. “You are yourself in there– in the kitchen, baking, thinking, singing. It’s the happiest I’ve seen you. Ever. And me. It’s the happiest I’ve been, Jin. So if there is anywhere that I think we should have this talk, is here.”

“Y/N… wow, I just,” He chokes on his words as he looks around, following you inside. “Thank you.”

You smile, going straight to the counter and reaching behind the cashier. “And I also keep this stashed in case of emergencies.”

“You’ve been here for just three months!” Jin screeches when he sees the bottle of tequila. “What emergency could happen in just three months?!”

“This one,” You point at him, pulling two latte cups from the shelf. You pour two shots, one for you and one for him, and signal for him to throw it back. Once your done, you do it again. “Okay, I’m ready now.”

“Really?” He coughs, making a disgusted face. “Two shots in and only now you’re ready?”

“… yeah,” you nod, eyes wide. He smiles, a sort of smile that makes you smile, too, and he nods.

“Okay,” He downs his third shot and you follow. “Okay. Now I’m ready too. So… Sana? This is what you want to know about?”

“Yes,” You nod a bit too fast and you can already start feeling your head spin a tiny bit.

He chuckles, more to himself the anything.

“We met when we were teenagers,” Jin starts, smiling with the fond memory. “Our parents were really good friends and I guess it just just made sense when we started dating. They were happy and I think that’s what made us think we were happy, too. We dated through college, on and off, and a year ago, when I started planning for the bakery, Sana starting planning for something else… she wanted to get married.”

“Uh, was she… pregnant?” You mumble, trying to wrap your head around it.

“No,” He frowns. “Thank god, no. We wouldn’t work. We didn’t work, actually. When I told her that she needed to wait a bit, a year or so, she said that she had already waited for too long. She told me that she had wasted her best years on me, hoping that one day I’d ask for her to marry me, and we would start a family and grow old together and… and I realized that that’s not what I wanted. Sure I loved her and I wanted a future with her, but I also wanted to have a future. The family, the apartment by the river, the kids; it would all cost me of my one dream– this bakery. And I wasn’t ready to give that up.”

You nod in understanding; shoving a dream aside for someone else is something that you got quite used to back in your old company, and it hurt to see that same kind of sadness in the eyes of this man that you’ve only seen working with love.

“But you didn’t,” You pour him another shot that he takes instantly. “You persevered, Kim Seokjin. That’s more than I can say for myself.”

He nods. “Yeah, but at what cost?” His voice is dry and small. For the first time ever since you met him, the big and tall man seemed small like a child. You just wanted to embrace him, and embrace him you did. The inhibition that comes with the alcohol is all you needed to push your body off of your chair and hug Jin, hands slowly patting his back in support. “I lost Sana and it took me months to pull myself together and get the loans for the bakery. I remember waiting to hear from the bank and thinking that maybe I shouldn’t be doing this; maybe I was wrong in putting everything aside from this; that maybe Sana was right, you know? This would never work. “

“Jin–“

“But it did!” He chuckles, voice wavering. When you feel the tears soaking through your shirt, and just hold him tighter. “It worked and why do I still feel so fucking alone?”

His shoulders shake with the intensity of his sobs and you hold yourself back from crying, too.

“You’re not alone, Jin,” You whisper into his hair, cradling his head with careful hands. “You’re never alone. Literally. I’m always here, and the costumers love you so much–“

“Sure, I’m not alone when I’m in the bakery,” He pulls aways a little bit so that he can look at you, hands on your waist as he makes guides you to sit down on the corner of the table. “But when I go home? To an empty apartment? I’m by myself, Y/N. And I hate it.”

“Is that why you refused to go home for the first weeks of me working here?” He nods at your question and you wonder just how many nights he spent in these same tables, crying, sleeping, thinking. “Jin…”

“I’m better, though,” Jin’s eyes stare right into yours and his hands soften on your waits, moving a bit down to rest on top of your thighs. You eyes flutter with the shivers that run all though your body, but you keep focused on the man before you, scooting his chair a bit closer so that he can position himself in between your open legs. “Ever since you got here, Y/N, I’ve been better.”

Jin gets up, taking a step closer to you; and another, and another, and then his nose nuzzles yours, and his hands move back to your waist, hanging dangerously lower than before. His breath fans your mouth and you gasp with the intense need that takes over your body as you pull him closer by his hoodie, mouth hungrily moving against his. There is not an inch of your bodies that don’t touch and you think that the alcohol has something to do with this impulsive decision. A part of you tells you to pull away– this is your boss, after all; but the other part of you, the stronger and crazier part of you, tells you to pull his hoodie off of him and let him remove your sweater.

“Y/N,” Jin growls in your ear just as you pull his hair. “Jesus christ, you’re going to be the death of me.”

“Shut up and kiss me,” You mumble, moving from his neck back to his mouth. “I need you.”

You are the first one to utter those words– the momentary truth, you think about it, and your heart hurt a little bit. Enjoy this now, you tell yourself, allowing Jin to carry you from the table to the ground behind the counter, the only place safe from the huge windows out front. Because tomorrow it will be gone. His hands move quickly on your pants, just as you fight against his; and before you know it, you are both naked on the floor.

“Last chance,” He mumbles to your mouth. “Are you sure about this?”

“Absolutely,” You say, regret already settling in; but just like everything else, you push it aside.

When you wake up lying on the cold and uncomfortable floor by yourself, you know that what is done and is done, and that as much as you tried to stay with him, you’re the one that woke up alone.

————————————

It ends up that sleeping in the cold bakery on the cold floor is not the best idea out there and you stay in your apartment, sick and sleepy, for the next three days. You stay disconnected from everything electronic– computers, phones, television– only using the house phone to call the bakery and tell Jin you’d not be able to make it; again. You admit that hearing his voice takes you back to that intense night, and even sick, you feel a sliver of excitement growing on you, but you have only a few minutes to enjoy it, before going into another coughing fit or sneezing your brains out.

The phone is what wakes you up in the morning, and you mindlessly feel around your bedside table until you find it, buried under used tissues and a half-read book.

“Hello?” You pick it up, groggily trying to pick-up your scattered mind.

“Y/N?”

Your heart stop.

“Seojun?”

“Oh thank god you picked up,” He sighs on the other end. “I’ve been trying to get in touch with you for the past four days! I though you were ignoring me!”

“N-No, never, I-I just…” You pull away to cough. “I’m feeling a bit sick, and I’ve–“

“Oh no,” He mumbles something on the other end of the phone and it sounds like he’s talking to someone. “Send me your address, I’m bringing you breakfast and medicine.”

“Wha- No, Seojun, you don’t ha–“

“Forget it, I got it right here,” Another voice mumbles something and you stare at your phone, confused. “See you in twenty.”

Sighing in defeat, you throw the phone on the other side of the bed and move to the bathroom, hoping that a shower would help you feel more alive. It didn’t and now you just feel more tired then ever, dragging your body to the living room where you can at least enjoy a few episodes of Criminal Minds, putting the volume way down low so that your migraine doesn’t get worse. You are not sure how long its been and you might’ve fallen asleep, but the harsh knocks on the door have you jumping up and running to the door in seconds.

“Seoju–“ You stop mid-sentence, smile fading when seeing who’s next to him. “Mr. Nam. What are you doing here?”

“Y/N!” Seojun, gasps. “Don’t be rude.”

You smirk, rolling your eyes. “He’s not my boss, I owe him no respect.”

“I expected that, Seojun, don’t worry,” Mr. Nam pats Seojun back, in a supporting manner that you’ve never seen before. “Ms. Y/L/N, how have you been?”

“Look, maybe we should do this another day, I don’t feel good as it is and this is not helping,” You try to close the door, but when Mr. Nam blocked the entrance with his foot and pushed the door open, there was nothing you could do about it. “Mr. Nam. Please get out of my house.”

“Now, now, Ms. Y/L/N,” He sits on your couch and Seojun follows, barely raising his eyes from the ground in shame. “I think we need to talk.”

You break out in cold sweat and you are sure it is not thanks to the two blankets wrapped around you.

“I don’t think we have anything to talk about,” You say, voice wavering but standing your ground still.

“Don’t be disrespectful, Y/N,” Seojun practically begs. “Just sit down and listen to Mr. Nam. He just wants to talk.”

“Seojun,” You gasp, not believing that your friend is doing this to you. After you formally quit from the company, you told him what happened, and at the time he had shown you full support towards quitting.

“No,” He rises up, voice clearly angry. “Stop being a bitch, and listen to other people for once.”

This is like a punch to your stomach, and holding tears back, you excuse yourself out of your own apartment to knock on the neighbor’s door, a young man you met when you moved in.

“Hey,” You mumble, sniffling a bit, and his eyes go wide. “Hey Namjoon, c-can you help me for a sec?”

“Y-yeah, of course,” He steps out of his apartment, putting his hands on your shoulders. “Are you okay?”

“Not really,” You say, and you proceed to give him a quick overview of what happened in between you and Mr. Nam. “… and that’s why I need your help. He makes me uncomfortable and, honestly, scared, so I don’t want to be alone with them. Could you come back with me and pretend to look for something or whatever?”

“Yeah, of course!” He frowns and straightens his back, making himself even taller. “Let’s go.”

“I’m sure I left it right over there,” You say loudly, making sure that Mr. Nam and Seojun hear you coming back in with someone else. “In the kitchen.”

“Who’s that?” Mr. Nam asks as Namjoon slowly moves to the kitchen, giving him and Seojun a cold nod.

“That’s my neighbor,” You say, taking a step back from the man, keeping yourself close to the kitchen door. “He lent me something a few weeks ago and needed it back…”

“Now?” Seojun rolls his eyes. “This is ridiculous.”

“It’s okay, don’t worry,” Mr. Nam chuckles. “Can we talk now?”

“What about?”

“Sit,” Your ex-boss points at the place next to him in the couch but you prefer to sit on the armchair, separated from the couch by a center table. “Okay. I came here to tell you that we want you back.”

“W-What?”

“We want you back, Y/N,” Mr. Nam sighs. You faintly notice Namjoon in the kitchen, but your heartbeat takes over and soon enough you can barely hear anything but the du-dum, du-dum, du-dum du-dum du-dum and you feel as if the room is spinning out of control.

“No” You mumble, starting with no strength at all but soon enough letting all your emotions out. “No way. I have a job! One that doesn’t have me crying in bathrooms; one that doesn’t have my boss abusing his power. I am finally happy and I am never going back to work for you, Jaesung Nam.” When you’re done, Namjoon is right behind you, ready to jump in whenever necessary.

“Y/N Y/L/N, apologize right now,” Seojun demands, taking a step towards you but stoping when Namjoon puts himself in the middle. “Can’t you appreciate what Mr. Nam is trying to do for you? What job could you have that is better than the one you had before?” Taking a deep breath, you ready yourself for the mocking that will surely come. “I work at the bakery a few blocks away. You probably hear of it, it’s gotten really popular.”

“Wait,” Namjoon is the one turning to you, surprised. “You work with Jin? You’re the new girl?”

“You know Jin?” You cough, chocking on your words.

“A bakery?” Mr. Nam laughs. “Y/N, come back to the company. We’ll re-instate you in the marketing team, offer you a better pay, and–“

“I used to be Marketing manager,” You sigh. “You want me back, but not enough to finally give me the recognition I deserve, huh?”

“Y/N–“

“How do you even expect me to come back when you’re offering me a demotion?” You cry out, sniffing through the stuffed nose that now seemed to be getting worse. “Y-You know what? Get the fuck out. I’m done with you two, get out before I lose my fucking mind.”

And when you least expect it, there’s another knock on the door.

“Oh my– who the fuck could that be, huh?!” You squint your eyes at your ex-coworkers. “Ms. Jung from Accounting? Mr. Lim from Editorial? Oh! No, wait, I got it– GOT7, how about that?”

You swing the door open only to see Jin looking as angry as Namjoon. He marches in, pushing you behind him, and you swear to god you’ve never seen a man wearing a black hoodie and blue jeans look so hot in your entire life. His hand is strong and warm around yours, and all the adrenaline that was previously running through your body starts to run out, and the sickness sinks in, leaving you tired once again. So tired that while all the male energy in the room is preoccupied with staring each other down, you feel faint and allow your head to rest on Jin’s back.

“What is happening over here?” Jin asks, voice low and dangerous. “Joon texted me and I ran over.”

“Nothing,” You grunt, trying to lift an arm to point at Mr. Nam, but you have no energy left in you. “They are just leaving.”

“Ms. Y/L/N, just listen to us,” Mr. Nam hisses, with that sick smile of his plastered on his face. “We have a great offer. Passing down like this is foolish, you’re being–“

“Naive?” You snap, coming out from behind Jin. “Huh? I’m being what, Mr. Nam? A scared, little girl? What you gonna do about it? Scream at me? Point at me? Steal my ideas?”

He gulps and something within you clicks.

“Is that why you’re here?” You ask, looking at both men. “Because you want my ideas?”

“Listen, you were our best marketer,” Mr. Nam says, although you know he doesn’t want to. “You came up with the best ideas for our auditions and publishing offices. We need that back.”

“Oh, that is golden,” You laugh, humorlessly. “You are back here, in my apartment, begging me to come back, because you want to steal my ideas again?!”

“Say the word, Y/N,” Namjoon mutters behind you. “Say the word and Jin-hyung and I will take care of these idiots.”

“Leave them to me,” You smile creepily. “I’ve been dying to do this for years.”

With just three long strides you walk to Mr. Nam, the man that still torments your dreams and haunts your every decision, and slap him across his face.

“Get out.”

Every word is strong and loud.

“Get out of my house, you fucking dumbass,” You hiss in his face. “Before I call the police to escort you out. If you can’t do your job, don’t come begging me to do it for you. I’m done. Leave.”

Seojun tries to grab your hand, to stop you, talk to you, beg you, you wouldn’t know– Jin got in the middle and practically dragged both of them out of your living room and into the elevator.

“We’re going to your precinct first thing in the morning,” Jin tells Namjoon and his friend nods. “We’re going to need to file restraining order for Y/N.”

“What are you talking about?” You scoff, just wanting all of this to be done so you can finally enjoy the feeling of standing up against Mr. Nam. “I just want to sleep, guys. Thanks for everything, the two of you, but I think you should go.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Jin asks you with wide, unbelieving eyes. “I’ve been trying to talk to you for four days and nothing. Then, the first time I see you again, you have two insane men in your apartment. So no; I’m not going to leave.”

You blink, not sure how to proceed. “Jin, I’m feeling really sick right now, okay? I want to explain everything, but I really just need to sleep this cold off first.”

“Then go sleep,” He pushes you to the hallway. “I’ll stay here and make you some soup for dinner. I can also go grab some medicine from Joon’s place, he has a whole pharmacy in there.”

It takes some convincing, but apparently Jin is really good at that. While you sleep, he busies himself with cooking and humming through the morning. When you wake up again, it’s barely noon, and your house is filled with the most amazing smell of kimchi-jjigae.

“Come eat,” Jin smiles a bit when he sees you standing by the kitchen door, Joon nowhere to be seen.

“You really didn’t have to,” You say, taking the pills he gives you. “But thank you. Really. It means a lot.”

“You’re welcome,” He blushes. “I was worried. You weren’t responding to my texts or answering my calls… when Namjoon texted me I was relieved for a second.”

“I’m sorry you got dragged into that,” You say, voice coming out less raspy thanks to the warmth of the soup. “I didn’t know Mr. Nam was coming here and–“

“He’s the asshole that made you quit, isn’t he?” He asks, grabbing your hand. You nod, still eating. “I can’t believe he did that to you, Y/N, I swear to god if I see him again, I’m going to end him.”

“Why?”

The question comes out before you can even think about it.

“What?”

“Why do you care, Jin?” You smile, although quite sadly. “I mean… I woke up alone, for crying out loud. You left me, and I woke up by myself. So if you didn’t care then, why do you care now?”

“I always cared,” Jin says, rolling his eyes. He sets a plate in front of your and everything smells delicious. “I know I don’t always show it, but I always cared. The only reason I kept the cinnamon buns in the menu is so that Minji comes back every morning and talks to you– you seem happy when she’s around. I make to cook a fresh batch of chocolate chip scones just so that you have your cool down time, as I like to call it; it’s when we have almost no movement and you allow yourself to sit down and eat something, so I always try to have your favorite ready.”

“Is that why we always have an absurd amount of chocolate chip scones left?!” You ask, gasping in shock.

“Of course,” Jin laughs, watching you pout. “No one eats that atrocity. Just you.”

“So you make those just for me?” You whisper, feeling your eyes starting to tear.

“You like them,” He sighs, and when Jin finally looks at you again, you recognize the emotions swirling in his eyes. You saw them before– that night. “Jin–“

“I also talked to Sana,” He clear his throat, telling you everything he feels need to get out of the way. “She is not going to bother us again. I told her I am not going back and that we–“

You don’t care about the rest of that sentence. The us and we is all you need to finally be certain that Jin is as much in this as you are; so you kiss him. You grab him by his shirt, and for a second you have a deja-vu of the two of your drunk, on the floor, on the table; however, nothing matters once his hands find your hair and he tugs your head back, giving him more access to your mouth, your neck, your everything. Jin is as unsure as you are but soon enough you two are on the couch, his hands on your ass, bringing you as close as humanly possible.

“Y/N,” He groans, and you whine, desperate for his attention. “Goddamnit, woman.”

Your mouth moves from his, down to his neck– your teeth sinks in his skin, softly pulling a groan out of him, and you can swear you feel it down to your bones.

“I like you,” You whine, too lost in the sensation of him to actually pay attention to your words. “Fuck, Jin…”

“I like you more,” He chuckles, mouth finding yours once again, pulling and pushing, giving and taking, and taking, and taking all you can give. “I like you so much more.”

You chuckle, rolling your eyes, and when he notices, he bites your lower lip, pulling it a bit. “Careful, there princess.”

“Jin,” At this point, your head is completely empty… so empty that when you sneeze, you are as shocked as the man in from of you. “I forgot!”

“You forgot you are sick?” He laughs, making that high pitched sound you’ve grown to love so much.

“It’s all your fault,” You groan, trying to get up from the couch. He holds you down.

“Make that noise again and a stupid cold won’t be enough to keep me away from you,” He whispers in your ear, giving your neck a last nip before getting up and pulling you with him. “Now go take a nap. I need you better soon, that place is a mess without you.”

“You can just say you’re a mess without me,” You wink, moving to your room. “I won’t judge.”

For the next couple of days, Jin stuck by your side, only leaving to go grab a couple of extra clothes. He nurses you until you are feeling new again, and until you are able to go back to work. Those days had been absolute heaven; you and Jin had time to explore your new-found romance, pampering each other with kisses and compliments and the occasional make-out session. Although it took both of you some time, you had finally found each other, and you can barely sleep the night before having to go to the bakery again. You finally knew what it felt like loving your work; but now you’ve reached a new level. You get to the bakery with a smile, even if you haven’t slept a wink, and opening the place up, so that people that love the food, the drinks, the ambiance, can have a good start to their day, or a good end, if it’s late at night. And when you are finally done cleaning, you wait for Jin while sipping on some tea, watching him hum a random song; and it’s usually then that you know, you’ve never been this happy.

--------------------------------------------------------------

holy shit this was long! hahaha I think this is the longest fic I’ve ever written, but it’s worth it! I absolute love it :) what do you think? Let me know in the comments! Your opinion matters the world to me <3

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selfmadesuperhero · 4 years ago

Text

i’m very much not okay

and i’ll probably take very long for me to explain why

i don’t know how to write this. i don’t know where to even start. i’m here because i just don’t have anywhere else to go. i can’t afford therapy. i no longer have any close friends other than Mabu (gf).

it’s getting pretty bad inside my head

i know most people’s lives are hell this year and i’m not special. i know that. to me, this year is feeling like the last nail in my coffin because 2019 had already chewed me up and spit me out.

i kept my last job for eight years. after my first year there, another developer came in, and we became friends. we worked side by side less than 4 feet apart for six years. our hours were flexible but we always agreed upon our schedule just so work would be more bearable, because we both hated it and often had to team up against our boss’ downright abuse. it was a very small company (at its biggest we were only 7 employees). we were also going to graduate at the same time from the same school (different majors), so we had a bit of a pact to leave our shitty boss once we’d graduated and start developing our own, way less shitty games.

at the start of 2019, he got an excellent job offer. i was thrilled for him and told him to of course get out of that hellhole we hated so much, we were only there because the pay was decent and the hours were flexible so we could get our degree, you know? it stung, but i was happy for him. on the last day i gave him a ride home (which is also something i did almost daily), he surprised me by hugging me and telling me i was like a brother to him and our plans weren’t going to change.

i believed him, and went back to work. he was soon replaced, obviously, by a junior developer because that’s how capitalism works. but suddenly, i no longer had someone to take a stand with me against my boss - there was no one left that i knew, everyone had resigned or been fired and i was the oldest employee. you’d think that’d earn me something, after eight years being dedicated to the same company, right?

(shortly after, my grandma passed, after years and years of agonizing in a wheelchair. we lived together)

fuck that

the first months were fine. i was being the senior developer and teaching the junior constantly, so my boss stayed out of my way. but see, this is where he started to get ansty. the more the junior stopped being a junior and was actually useful for something, the more that piece of gigantic ass just started thinking only about our salaries. i started in that company in 2012 making little more than 3 bucks/hour (remember i live in a third world country, but it was still specialized work), but by 2019, my salary was pretty much double of what the junior was making, and every penny extra i got during those years was a CONQUEST. i also worked six hours while he worked eight, so.

my boss basically started treating me even more like shit. he wasn’t nice to be around before, but he was bearable in small amounts. suddenly it was obvious to everyone that he was really fixating on me and my performance, and to me it was obvious he just wanted me to walk away too so he could replace me with TWO junior developers instead of just one measly charlie.

then, the nationals elections began. oh boy.

this probably wouldn’t read as news to anyone, but i’m a huge leftie, obviously. if you’re at all interested in politics, read about what socialist policies have done for uruguay during the past 15 years and how they turned us into AT LEAST a developing country, but i digress.

the people that sat in my office even shared my political views or whatever, but my boss is actually part of the conservative party and started actively campaigning. every time something involving politics happened, he made a point to come barging in the office and telling me and specifically me about it like i was personally running against his party. i actually recorded him once to have proof of him at least screaming at me, so i could check if i was crazy for thinking he had something against me. he frequently called me communist and just mocked my views. if you’re wondering, yes, this is illegal, but nothing happened.

then, two big things happened at once: we lost the election, and my recently adopted puppy was diagnosed with distemper. yes, it happened on the same that and it’s a day i’ll never forget.

my girlfriend and i had talked about getting a puppy once we moved in together. we’d named him like two years before it actually happened. we moved in together on may 2019 and on september i found the most precious boy for adoption on facebook and i was innocently all like “oh i’ve had to put rescue dogs for adoption before, let’s give back!”.

on october 27th, he had a seizure and the vet told us it was likely we’d have to put him down because only 20% of dogs survived, and it was even less for puppies.

when i went to work, i had to put up with my boss laughing and mocking me for winning the election “against me”. i guess i missed my running for anything?

this post is already too long for me to get into details about my dog’s disease. for months, every day we looked after him constantly. i read everything there was to BE READ about distemper online, spent thousands of pesos on medicine and treatments just in case he had a chance. good news is he did! this is the only positive note in this post.

it still wasn’t easy. he made us cry at least three times a day. we really thought he was dying, and we’d made the mistake of naming him 2 years before he was even born. we’d taken PERFECT care of him while he was unvaccinated, but the vet told us it was most likely he was already infected before he came home to us. i’d never seen such a small puppy so sick. he hallucinated constantly. if you don’t know, distemper is a neuro/digestive/skin/bone/HELL disease that’s really nasty. he’d have seizures almost daily and poop and pee himself. he stopped being able to control his body other than his two front legs, which he didn’t even have full control of. when he stopped being able to walk, he started crying constantly, it really tore the heart out of my chest

we called another vet, a dog physical therapist, so she’d tell us how we could help him. she told us to make him stand as long as possible, so every time he had a meal, i’d bend down with him and hold his hips - so he’d be able to stand, and slowly gain back some muscle mobility. every day we massaged his legs and flexed his joints, even his tiny toes, so he’d avoid atrophy. and we did it!! as i’m writing this, he’s one year old now, he’s no longer sick even if he’ll carry with him plenty of lifelong sequels, and he walks and runs and barks like the best of them ♥ i wasn’t going to plug anything but if you wanna see his progress, it’s on instagram @hamiltonthefighter

okay, i guess i ended up talking at length about his disease in the end, sorry. his walking again had a price to pay for me: my own back. for two or three months i was bent over this dog, you know? i still can’t get out of bed without help sometimes lol around december it got really bad but i just kept popping pills because joy oh joy, i was doing my thesis and i didn’t really have time or money for anything else. my job was basically paying for our rent, my university classes including the thesis course which was ridiculously expensive, and our dog had given me credit card debt out of desperation (we even had to buy those rubber things used for yoga to place on our floors so he’d have something to use his nails against instead of constantly slipping on the floor, we tried every medication that might help, we gave him CBD oils, all kinds of vitamins, constant vet visits where during the first two weeks he got like three different shots every day, etc)

i’m rambling, and i’m sorry, but i don’t really think anyone will read this. i started this post crying my eyes out and writing about my dog at least has been calming, because even if he’s a drooling mess now, he’s still the same he ever was and i love him very much and he’s sleeping soundly next to me and he’s finally close to fine.

remember the friend i talked about like half an hour ago? the one that worked with me for six years? nothing changed between us during the first months. for my thesis, i was going to develop a videogame with Mabu, but we were allowed to have external coding help because it was about GameDev, not the actual coding. i knew how to code, obviously, but Nico (the friend, guess we’ll give him a name) was also part of our project so he was gonna help us code so i had more time to focus on art and 3D modelling. the idea was kill two birds with one stone, make something we all liked, mabu and I were going to graduate with it and then we’d keep working on it during 2020 as we’d always always talked about.

by december, even if nico and i still talked regularly, i could tell he had just moved on with his life. he’d said he’d help us, but he was doing his own thesis, so i told him not to worry at that time, our final due date was in february. he asked us to forgive him during december and promised us he’d come back in january to DEVOTE himself to the project. i started coding the project besides working on the art and i was thankfully able to meet all the deadlines, so it was really fine, of course i understood where he was coming from.

then, on january 7th, Mabu’s grandma passed away. she was scheduled for a heart surgery that supposedly only had 1% risk, and she passed on the table because of a doctor’s mistake. the surgery was here in the capital, but Mabu’s family lives five hours away. she comes from a very big, very loving family, and her grandma (being the mother of five children) was very much the center of it. i also loved her. she’d replaced my grandma the second she passed and every time i saw her she hugged me like i was a lost grandson.

when my girlfriend called me during her surgery, i immediately left work because i just knew she would be crying if things were okay. this was a nightmare come alive for a family of 20+ people, and most of them were 5 hours away from their own house. my mother in law was (and still is) devastated by the lost of her mother because she was the one to encourage the surgery and she still thinks she killed her. i drove my her, my girlfriend, her sister and her sister’s boyfriend on my mother’s in law van for five hours while they all cried or slept and i had to really, really pinch myself because i was EXHAUSTED but what else could i do?

logically i missed work the next day. LOGICALLY. i had the service to attend and i was 5 hours away from the office and i didn’t even have my own car with me. i told my boss to discount the day, since i wasn’t entitled to the mourning day by law because it wasn’t my grandma. he didn’t even reply - he almost never talked to me by this point unless it was to berate me for something. i went back to work the day after the service.

now, remember we were doing our thesis and it was due in february? it really wasn’t great timing for anyone to die, but i was trusting Nico’s promise that he’d have more free time and he’d make up for not helping us code sooner. i told him the news about Mabu’s grandma, and then basically had to tell him to say something to her for her loss because he was supposed to be her friend, what the fuck, why aren’t you at least sending her a text.

let’s just say, january wasn’t a great month for Mabu and myself. two weeks after the passing, we still hadn’t had news from Nico. Mabu didn’t even have time to properly mourn because we had to turn our thesis in like, little over a month. i wrote to nico just downright ASKING if he was gonna be able to help us or WHAT, to which he said to me...

he’d never promised anything because he was really busy with his own stuff and he didn’t want to bring it up sooner because he knew Mabu was mourning and things were hard for us at the moment?

like that’s great pal, thanks for telling me at the last POSSIBLE second you were just dropping out altogether, what the actual fuck? it still baffles me that someone can be so thick headed, but he kept saying he had made no promises and both Mabu and I knew that was a lie and i honestly just couldn’t deal with someone so selfish he couldn’t at least give a heads up sooner

the icing on the cake during the beginning of this year is someone i haven’t even mentined: MY PIECE OF SHIT BROTHER. talking about him may deserve another post, because this is already so long and convoluted and i haven’t even talked about his involvement in my misery during 2019-2020. i’ll try to make the story short if anyone’s still reading this far:

a lot of years ago, our maternal grandmother moved to uruguay from russia and bought a tiny shitty house here next to my mother’s. my mother still hasn’t talked to me since 2013 because i’m trans, but that’s neither here nor there. i tried to keep in touch with my brother (we don’t share dads so he was no relation with my side of the family), and around 2017 i finally succeeded in making friends with him. or so i thought, clearly.

that grandmother passed... sometime. i don’t really know because they cut me off. she didn’t speak to me either, she was literally a crazy old nasty woman and i didn’t even care when i heard she’d died, to be honest. she was such a nasty woman, she’d put her tiny shitty house to my and my brother’s name just to keep her own daughter out of the inheritance when she bought it.

that also meant i was inheriting something for the first time ever, even if it was shitty. BUT my brother had his own fake grandma (the woman who looked after him his whole life instead of our mother) who was very old and frail and asked me if he could house her there. i said yes because again, i didn’t give a shit about the inheritance or the house or anything regarding my mother’s side of the family (other than him obviously), so for years this woman occupied the house. my brother basically took all existing furniture and appliances because he was moving in with a girlfriend and i even loaded up my shitty car with his stuff. all i wanted to inherit was the couch set, which had come all the way from russia and everyone had promised me since i was a wee lad, but he started whining about his fake-grandma not having a living room set and nowhere to sit and i didn’t even live by myself yet so i let them have the fucking couches, too.

oh boy this is already too long but now i’m too lazy to make a separate post

anyway, sometime during 2019, the woman moved out to an old folks home because she could no longer take care of herself. i immediately asked about the couch set with hope in my heart that it could finally be mine, but my brother told me our mother didn’t want me to have it.

he wanted to rent the house to make a profit, which sounded good to me because of that dog related credit card debt i talked about. and here’s where you might think i’m not that there in the head, but all my life i didn’t want anything to do with that house until my mother was in the ground - not out of hate but because i thought it was a shitty thing her own mother had done to her, and the inheritance should have been hers. she doesn’t have a degree or a stable job because she’s a russian translator so hey, whatever, they needed it more than i did. but then my brother starting getting ideas about improving the house so we’d make more money, and how we should do it together, and... i think i might have mentioned already why i didn’t exactly have time to redo a house? i was doing my thesis? about to graduate? my boss was constantly on my case? my dog was about to die?

i helped as much as i could at first, but then december came, and then january, and my brother just kept nagging me about the house like i was purposefuly sitting on my ass doing nothing, because oh every day it’s not rented it’s money lost. no amount of explaining how stretched thin i was seemed to suffice, not even when mabu’s grandma died and nico left us hanging with the thesis and i had less than a month left to code the whole project by myself while ALSO taking care of the art.

by the end of january, i was so stressed, i called a doctor after a panic attack. he gave me a weeks rest because of my back, because i wasn’t even able to get up without help at that time. it wasn’t much of a rest because i still used that time to sit at the computer and code 15 hours a day at LEAST, but hey.

it was the first time in 8 years i’d taken medical leave of ANY kind. i didn’t even get medical leave when i got my chest surgery. it happened on a friday and i was back to work the next monday. i’d never skipped more than 2 days of work at best when i had a bad case of the flu or something, but that was it.

when i went back to work, my boss immediatelly called me to his office. he started berating me about my performance again, bringing graphs comparing the amount of lines of code i’d written next to my coworkers. i didn’t mention this, but the graphic designer had also quit during 2019, so i was also covering that workload and no, that didn’t exactly translate to lines of code. i also had to spend HOURS every day tutoring the junior because he was too much of a cheap shit (didn’t use those words) to hire an experienced developer. i’d even WORKED AS A GRAPHIC DESIGNER FOR MEDIA CONTENT FOR HIS POLITICAL CAREER, EVEN IF IT WAS AGAINST MY BELIEFS AND NOT AT ALL RELATED TO MY JOB. he denied everything. EVERYTHING. he stuck to the narrative that i was just lazy and the proof was i’d just taken AN ENTIRE WEEK because “my back just hurt a little” and i had the audacity to skip work for someone else’s grandmother dying

i’m not exaggerating, i swear to anyone who might be reading this. that day was brutal and i’m still not over it half a year later, i don’t care if that makes me sound like a wuss. i worked eight years of my life in this fucking place.

this argument lasted for hours, but i kept my head down because i couldn’t afford to lose the job, specially not then. i even apologized for any loss in performance and tried to explain my point of view and what i was going through (which i’d already done to another superior weeks ago anyway). but just when i thought i’d MAYBE be able to keep my head above water, he told me he was denying my the request i’d made to take two weeks of holiday days before the thesis final due date.

i had already explained everything to him. everything, even nico dropping the team and my having to do everything by myself. i broke down and i told him he was forcing me to leave my job, i’d just have been certified by a doctor and i was asking for leave for SCHOOL (all things that are protected by law here), but he just kept repeating i could either walk away from my job or show up during those two weeks. he just wanted me gone, but he couldn’t fire me right away without having to pay me THOUSANDS because of my seniority (by law). he knew what he was doing to me and he didn’t care about it. he didn’t even let me TOUCH MY COMPUTER, he told me he wasn’t the one pushing me away, that i was doing this to myself, and he’d ask for a lawyer to check my computer for any “inconsistencies in my activity”, even. i really have a hard time just thinking about that day and how utterly humilliating it was. i lost a lot of personal files, because i sat at that desk for eight years and of course i had personal files because sometimes i stayed after hours before going to class.

imagine for a second a sixty year old man, rich as shit, political candidate, standing in front of a computer, disconnecting the mouse and keyboard so i couldn’t touch it, yelling at me i was doing this to myself and i was losing my job because i had the audacity to ask for two weeks leave to finish my fucking school thesis.

and yeah, i lawyered up. i didn’t have actual money to AFFORD a lawyer, but mabu’s cousin’s girlfriend was a lawyer and lived one block away and i immediatelly told her everything there was to tell. she brought me to the firm she worked in and they guaranteed me i had a pretty strong case and i was at least gonna be able to walk away with something.

that put things in hold for a while because the “trial” or whatever wasn’t gonna be held until after the thesis, so i tried to forget about it. my boss even owed me my untaken paid vacation days, which i told the lawyers because i was pretty sure he’d just forgot, but i wanted to know if it made a better case against him. they agreed, and i left it at that.

but you know who was still making my life miserable even when february began and i had less than three weeks to finish our project right? MY SWEET BABY BRO. he was constantly nagging me about having to do all the work himself, like I’D ASKED ANYTHING FROM THAT HOUSE TO BEGIN WITH. but see, the nastier he started getting, the more apparent his lies began to appear. he got nasty to the level where ON THE DAY I WAS TURNING THE PROJECT IN he kept calling me demanding MONEY for stuff he’d paid for the house without checking in with me. i was honestly baffled by his level of selfishness, i was already sleeping three hours a day tops and he expected me to what, paint walls? he was FIERCELY against having to wait for my project to be done even if it was two weeks away and he was asking and asking for money when i’d just told him i’d lost my job without a penny to show for it. nice guy, really.

suddenly, the following lies became clear:

my mother didn’t care if i took the couch set, he told me that because he was moving again and he was planning on taking the couches himself. (he ended up doing just so, too). he lied to me with the thing that hurts me most in the world: my mother hating me. he had even made a joke about it, because my mother had bought a new couch not long ago, and he didn’t “get” why she “didn’t want me to have anything”

years ago he’d told me he had refinanced a tax debt the house had, and i gave him money for it. now that the house was about to be put up for rent, he pretended that had never happened and suddenly started talking about how we needed to take care of that

he wasn’t planning on splitting the rent three ways between him, our mother and i. he was gonna keep two thirds, and i later even found out my own mother had given him the idea.

then poor mabu confessed to me once, two years ago, she’d wore a skirt one time visiting my brother and his then girlfriend, and he had told her nasty stuff to her year upon saying goodbye and she had never said anything because didn’t want to hurt our sibling relationship

talk about final nail huh?

i confronted him and he denied everything, obviously, he instantly played the victim card, how dare i think that way about him, how dare i break his dreams of reuniting the family again. he said things to me i’ll also never forget like, apparently, it shows that i’m a shit person because i have no friends and no one wants me around, unlike him that has so many. he told me i thought the world owed me when i was shit and i believed anything anyone told me before believing him. no one told me any of his lies, i caught them all by myself, but whatever. he cursed me and told me he never wanted anything to do with me because i was rotten and i only cared about money and i was so so selfish. this must have been around march and i still don’t know anything from him, or care.

what do i have to do for that side of the family to leave me alone, i wonder? all i ever wanted to do was be his friend

the “trial” against my boss came and suddenly every lawyer that worked at that firm was taking a fucking holiday except for the one that was supposedly leading my case - except suddenly, i didn’t have much of a case at all. i walked away with less than 2 thousand dollars and that was WITH the vacation days i hadn’t taken. the agreement was the lawyers were gonna keep 25% of however much i made but THAT vacation money wasn’t supposed to count because it didn’t come out of the “trial” thing, you know?

well, it did. the lawyer screwed me over too. but hey, at least he’d gotten me unemployment for a couple of months (you only apply for unemployment if you’re fired, not if you walk away from a job, and my having been fired or not was what was being contested), i still tried to be optimistic, i had a few months to figure things out while i looked for another job, and at least i was able to finish paying for school with that money.

yeah, this was late february, beginning of march. joke’s on me for being optimistic at all

my own brother plotting with my own mother against me has done a number for my mental health. i already had baggage aplenty, like every trans dude or girl whose parents would rather see them dead than be a dyke/fag (my mother’s own words, ladies and gents)

my boss of eight years kicking me to the curve at the worst moment in my life in the most humilliating of ways while blaming me for it has left me feeling so worthless to people in general. i’m getting better with time, i think, but i’m still all not there. i have a really hard time thinking my work is worth anything at all.

i keep thinking my brother was right, and i’m a shitty friend, and i don’t deserve anyone around. my only real friend at the moment is my girlfriend, which makes it really hard to have any arguments because i start feeling like my life is ending because she’s pretty much all i have left and she’s the most important thing in the world to me because i wouldn’t have survived all this shit i’m writing without her by my side. i would walk to hell and back for her. but nico also left me behind without a second thought, after telling me i was like a brother to him, no matter how many times i invited him to hang out or anything to keep in touch. i’ve been a shitty friend to a lot of people, but not him, and he still didn’t care about me at all, so i just stopped trying.

but now social distancing has got me all fucked up. i can’t trust people. i can’t go outside. everything is scary to me, i have at least two or three panic attacks per WEEK and they get nastier and longer every time. i know i need help, but i can’t even afford rent, let alone therapy. Uruguay has the worst unemployment rates since 2006 now thanks to our baby-Trump right now. i look for jobs daily even if the notion of having a job even SIMILAR to the one i had before gives me the shakes. programming isn’t as hard as some people may think, but the workplaces are usually VERY toxic because you’re valued by the amount of lines of code you write, and i’m so so tired. i’m still looking because I NEED. TO. PAY. RENT. but not because it’s something i want in life, at all. i’d much rather be poor and just do freelance work instead, but i’m failing.

i thank the people that have helped me or commissioned me these past few months from the bottom of my heart. i’m sorry i’m not more active, i’m sorry i’m still rusty and can’t draw faster, i’m sorry i sometimes spend half a day crying my eyes out because i just don’t know how to move forward. i have a week left, i still haven’t made enough for rent, let alone the bills or food. mabu used to get plenty of art commissions on etsy, but she hasn’t sold anything since march either and she’s younger than me so our financial struggles have an even deeper impact on her

i’m just so, so tired. i’m lucky to have mabu, and that is about it. i honestly don’t think i could have survived this year without her. for months the future has looked like a black screen to me. i can’t even trust the vegetable market in front of my fucking house because some piece of shit spread the rumor that i’m trans and now i can’t even open the door to my front house without getting stares sometimes, it’s ridiculous. i wish i could trust more than one person in the world so that everything wasn’t on her shoulders.

i’m not okay. we’re not okay.

that’s about it. i’m sorry i can’t end this on a more positive note. at least we graduated with an excellent score. not that we had a graduation, obviously. thanks corona.

thank you for reading if you read this far ♥

#this is literally 5k+ words of how my life went to shit :)#trying to write down feelings like i used to do seven years ago when i was transitioning because i have no other outlets #sorry new followers #(sorry old followers)

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jacscorner · 4 years ago

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Pokemon All-Stars: A Fan Region/Game/Alternate Universe Idea

I like watching and rewatching Original Pokemon Game/Region videos. Like Mr. Buddy's "What if X was a Pokemon Region" and stuff like that. I wanna make-or, I guess, write-my own. Since Regions are kind of a character all their own and I'm a Wannabe Character Artist, I wanted to try and make one my own.

I've got no skills in coding, pixel arts, or anything, so this will forever be just some kind of dumb fanfic that sometimes incorporates Game Mechanics to justify things if it were able, for some Godforsaken reason, 'stolen' for a game. Cause, in 2021, no idea feels too big or too dumb. And, uh, trust me, this'll be a dumb fanfic of an idea. So be aware for the subpar writing talents of some wannabe writer who doesn't know shit.

Small disclaimer though:

>This region is being made with the intention that every extra feature will be available in it. Z-Moves, Regional Variants, Gygantamax, Mega Evolutions, and maybe some things I've forgotten. This probably won't matter cause it's just a dumb fanfic plot bible with mechanics peppered in. Competitive balancing be damn! Pokemon Fans can create their own balance! That's what the Battle Simulator is for! In fact, if this was a real game, then it'd have a Battle Simulator like Showdown built into it.

>This is an open source Fanfic Bible. You can take this idea and run with it if you want. You can omit all my bad ideas even!

>I won't be making my own Fakemon. I don't like a lot of Fakemon that exists out there and, trust me when I say this: I am no better than them. In fact, I'm fucking worse.

>If this WERE a game, it probably WOULD still have to cut some Pokemon. I doubt that kinda, and I won't get into why I think dexit was dumb personally, cause it doesn't really matter. But, like, my fan game/fanfic will have a lot of shit going on in it. So, like, realistically, there would probably need to be a cut, if not for data, than just cause there's a lot of work to do as is. But, like, again, under the context of a fic, this wouldn't be an issue.

>With THAT said, I'd want this game to have a Gen 2 Sprite aesthetic. My fangame, don't care if ya'll don't like that.

>I'm probably gonna copy a LOT of stuff from other Fangames I've played. My shit memory probably won't allow me to remember what I'm biting from what, so be free to call me out whenever. Cause if I stole the mechanic, I probably liked it the game. And if not, well, I'd like the recommendation.

Fuck, this was long already. The rest is under the cut, so, like, if you're already turned off, you can stop reading. I understand. I'm kind of a windbag.

Okay, so how many of you guys have seen this picture on the internet? It's a picture of a ton of Pokemon regions all...basically stitched together, since not only could this never be canon, but this goes beyond the size of even most open world games today. But this was the inspiration for this project. The map probably wouldn't, and probably couldn't, look like this, but it perfectly sums up what I'd want out of this game. Thus, it'll be our placeholder.

Our hometown of Capricorn Town is home to Professor Chestnut, and you, her faithful assistant, are about to set off on a Pokemon adventure of your own! The Professor is encouraging you to see the region of Sidus for yourself and is even willing to give you a Starting Pokemon!

Starting Pokemon

Now, if I'm not making new Pokemon, which Starter will it be? Well, the game will have the data for all the starters and will randomly select a Grass, Fire, and Water Type for you to choose from. Those will be your starters, with the option of also choosing Pikachu, Eevee, and Riolu, the two mascot mons...and Riolu, who is kind of a mascot mon, but a lesser one.

Let's say for this example, your options are Torchic, Piplup, Rowlet, Pikachu, Eevee, and Riolu. And, uh, get used to the words 'random' and 'generator', those are our keywords.

Anyway, once you get your pick, there'll be some kind of tutorial mission the Professor will send you on. This will introduce you to two very important things;

1. One of your Rival.

2. An Evil Team Grunt.

Rivals?!

Now to start getting into why this game might still be pretty big still be big despite the sprites on modern consoles.

Each of your Rivals would be one kid from each region of the 8 Mainline Games from Kanto to Kalos. How this'll be decided is that each pair of kids will be plugging into a generator and will pick between either the boy or girl version.

Ex. Brendan and May both cannot be in the game. Instead, they'll be plugged into this generator. Let's say the generator fell onto May. She'll be one of your Rival. Repeat this process 7 more times until you have 8 Rivals sprinkled throughout the world, each one given a defined personality and better AI to make them harder trainers to fight.

May will have one of the Hoenn Starters, sans Torchic. Regardless of whether or not Protagonist-San picked Torchic, May will either have a Treecko or Mudkip, again, chosen at random per kid. Whichever Starter you picked, your first rival will have a starter that beats yours. So, let's say moving forward, May has a Mudkip and you a Torchic. The other kids will have random starters of the various regions they originally hail from.

Anyway, your rivals will wander the overworld. If they see you, they'll battle you on sight. If they lose, they'll be gone after the next time you turn the game off. They won't battle you again until they respawn, but you can hang out with them. In fact, you can even recruit them to be in your party for a few days and they'll follow you around and just generally be your friend. It'll make every battle a double battle, but they'll battle you again before their timer runs out, so be prepared!

BANG! BANG! ENTER! Team Wild!

The two of you will have to face off against Team Wild! They have a Cowboy theme to them, using a mix of Ground and Steel-Types, with a few Pokemon being added in for good measure like the Ponyta Lines, Cacnea Line, and Remoraid. Cause...it's a gun.

They're an outlaw gang, they're rough and tough (or, at least, a mild threat) and will always throw down when they spot ya. Something I'm just sniping from JelloApocalypse is that they'll appear sporadically and act as Timed Events across the map.

You and your new Rival beat them and send you packing. I'd imagine May and the other Rivals would mostly be friendly, but I'm sure there's one or two that'll just be jerks to you. Regardless of personality, they'll be pretty tough and programmed to skill with you. Your strongest mon you have on hand when you fight them will be the level their entire team.

With your tutorial done, the world is opened up! Your mom gives you your running shoes, some Pokeballs, and your...I don't know, PokeCelular or something, just the regional gadget that does a bunch of stuff. From holding your map to holding your VS Seeker.

The PokeCelular will also give you notifications on where Team Wild are! You can choose to ignore the events, but if you do, then they'll start to appear in the overworld know and will get progressively stronger.

A Balancing Act

This game will be an open world, 8-Bit Sprite Game for you to explore after you leave Capricorn!

So how do we balance that?

Well, we got our Rival out of the way already, so let's move on. Gym Leaders will have a pretty linear progression. However, regardless of which Gym you tackle first, they'll all be at the same level.

It doesn't matter if you decide to go across the map and battle the Bug Gym, he'll stay at Level 10, just like the Normal Gym. Whe you get the second badge, they'll all jump to Level 15. NPC Trainers will follow the same progression; the higher your badge number, the stronger the number of Pokemon they'll be.

Wild Pokemon will also get stronger. The more badges you get, it'll attract stronger wild Pokemon because they'll see you're stronger and will come out more.

The overworld will also have various dungeons in them that'll be Level Locked. Say, you go through a forest and you're just trying to reach the end of a maze. The Trainers and Pokemon will function the same as I've mentioned before. But, you can decide to go deeper into the dungeon. These Pokemon will be level locked, usually something of a high level, because this is a more dangerous part of the dungeon. But, there'll be some goodies down there, like rarer Pokemon and some kind of really rare and good item like a TM or something.

How will you traverse? Well, first of all, HMs? They're semi-back. BUT, instead of having to deal with teaching Cut to a Pokemon, you just need the move Cut and a Pokemon that can use the move and you'll be able to use Cut. A few other Pokemon that are reasonable candidates, but don't get cut, will be allowed to do this too. Like, Gallade can use Cut. It can't learn the move, but just holding the HM will get the job done.

Controversial opinion, but I think I've always liked the idea of HMs. On paper, they give you a reason to explore the world and go back to areas you couldn't before for goodies and make for a good way to get off dungeons until you get the needed item. Even something like Cut can be used to open up new areas for exploration for your squad of mons.

BUT, well, HMs suck. As moves, they suck save for, like, 2...MAYBE and they're only for, like, a handful of areas. You either hand them out as evenly as possible, forcing mons to take moves you don't wanna use, or you just get an HM Slave or two to use 'em all. But like they, they serve their function and all you need is the Pokemon in question and NOT teach them the move. If you need a Move Deleter just so people aren't stuck having to use Rock Smash for three towns, then there's a problem with your RPG. Imagine playing Final Fantasy and you had to give your Fighter the Bronze Axe to get through a forest and still had to fight with it, even though you got a +12 Silver Sword! It's no wonder people hated these things! But I don't think getting rid of them and introducing Rental Pokemon was a good solution either and adds a different, albeit less intrusive problem.

Gym Leaders

So, how do Gym Leaders work?

Much like your rivals, they'll be randomly generated. Let's say, hypothetically, there's a pool of 60 Gym Leaders and Elite Four members. The game will randomly generate 16 to be Gym Leaders. The generator will have some kind of complicated math (at least, too complicated for me) so that you don't have more than 2 gyms of the same type. (Example: Misty and Nessa might be Active Gyms, Siebold can't be selected for a Gym cause the Water Slots are taken).

As a trade off, some Gyms might have special conditions before you can challenge them. Like, if you got stuck with Koga as a Gym Leader, than he'll only let you in if you complete a nearby dungeon and help his daughter out cause he doesn't trust her to make it back on her own. Or, like, Claire's a Gym Leader, but she won't battle you unless you've collected 7 Gym Badges prior at least.

The Gym Leaders, as mentioned before, will get progressively stronger with each badge obtained. After the 8th badge, you can go and climb Victory Road, face the E4 and confront the Champion! You can keep hunting Gym Leaders, but just remember that the E4 will always be 10 Levels above the strongest gym you beat. And they'll just get stronger with every one you beat until all 16 are slain.

Another handful, let's say 8, Gym Leaders/E4 Members will be wondering around as NPC Trainers. The justification is that this big super region is in some Alternate Universe Pokemon Game that has all the Pokemon and other important trainers in it, hence why we can have a game where Roxanne and Lenora are hanging out at a coffee shop. They're not Rivals, more like stronger NPCs you can rematch and wonder the map. They're not here to be the very best like no one ever was.

I mean, I'd like, like, 10-20 instead of 8 extras, but let's not get TOO greedy...yet...

Elite Four

And now, it's time to flip the script. Cause if E4 members can be Gym Leaders, then who are the Elite Four?

Easy. The Rivals.

All the Rival characters will be put in a random generator as well. The four that are chosen. You can have an Elite Four made up of Wally, Marnie, Hau, and Barry and you gotta deal with it.

This is excluding Brendan and May, Blue, and Calem and Serena. Anyone else is fair game.

Champion

So, the Champion. Who would it be in this? There was a funny idea I had, but this is a Pokemon Game. So there would be two versions. We'll call them Pokemon Dawn & Dusk. The difference between these games is the game Champion!

Benga would be the Champion of Pokemon Dusk, the grandson of Alder! His final Team will include Volcarona, Garchomp, and Dragonite, Pokemon he used in Black and White. I'd also include Scrafty, Rampardos, and Golurk, Pokemon used against you in White Treehollow and Black Tower areas.

Meanwhile, the Champion of Pokemon Dusk will be Zinnia, the Lorekeeper! Her team would include the Goodra, Tyrantrum, Altaria, Noivern, and Salamence she used in her original team, with her plucky Whismur sidekick becoming an Exploud and her ace.

You would've met them in the beginning of the game and would've showed off a bit by helping you with Team Wild before. They'll pop in and out throughout the game, at first amused by your tenacity, but not wanting a rookie like you to get hurt. But if you keep bonking Team Wild, they'll be impressed with how strong you are.

The show up to chat again when you beat 8 Gym Leaders, and will pop in if you White Out to give you some advice. White Out three times and they'll feel bad for you and give you an egg. Benga will give you a Larvesta Egg and Zinnia a Bagon Egg.

EXTRAS

So I don't got a lot of ideas for the Post Game, but there is one idea I thought would be cool if, if after you defeat the champion, they give you a call. They'll tell you that there are strong trainers wondering the Overworld and to be careful.

Because dotting the overworld will be Champions passed and proper! Cynthia, Blue, Lance; all of them are rocking Lv 100 Teams and are out for blood. They won't challenge you, but if you talk to them, there will be no backing out of the battle! You come with your A-Game!

sI'm not exactly in love with the idea of Team Wild. Maybe the Evil Team should go full fanservice and just be Team Rainbow Rocket. Or maybe go half-and-half; having past Evil Team members and leaders walk around in cowboy gear and acting as Team Wild executives.

I'd also would love Tournaments. Like, maybe that could be a weekly event in some town, they'll how tournaments and the characters that aren't designated as Gym Leaders and such will attend. Maybe there's a cash prize, maybe you'll win Pokemon Eggs of rare, guaranteed shines, or maybe you'll get some kind of important quest items.

Yeah, I want quests! All sorts of side quests! And can't forget what I'd do with Legendairs;

If you know Bengal's team, you'll know he's got the Lati Twins. I don't like that personally and would prefer Legendaries to be Super Bosses. Like, you gotta do a lot to find them. And when you do, their stats are boosted and they become an Uber Boss! You catch them in a cutscene after you beat them!

There's also just a ton of characters I didn't get around to or really have a place for. Emma, Looker, N, and the Stat Trainers all come to mind. Overall, I'd want them to pepper the world as well, but don't have anything to say except this: Pokemon has made a lot of memorable characters. Both good and bad. And this is probably my dream Pokemon Game; one where you can hang out with your favorites

#Pokemon #Pokemon Dawn and Dusk #Fan Game #Fanfic Bible #Plot Bunny #JAC Notes

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scoobydoominuscoobydoo · 5 years ago

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Alright, I guess we should talk about Scoob!

So Scoob! was digitally release nearly a month ago and Mod Silas and I finally got around to watching it.

For anyone who liked it and don’t wanna read me heavily criticize it then I’ll just spoil you right now:

I did not like Scoob! at all.

And it was really disappointing because this is the first wide release film Scooby has gotten in 16 years. That’s a long time to think of bringing Scooby to the general public who don’t go out of their way to watch every single direct-to-video movie. The announcement of a new feature length film was two or three years ago and I was really excited to hear it because I was expecting some high-quality content.

My opinion of it quickly dropped a lot when it was revealed that the original voice cast wouldn’t be in it. That’s fine all on it’s own but they did it without even letting the original cast know they wouldn’t be a part of this (Besides Frank but he wasn’t even cast as who he originally played). Seeing both Matthew and Grey’s responses to this made me sad and I was significantly less excited for this movie.

Suddenly the concept of this movie not being that good became very real to me. How much passion can you have for Scooby-Doo when you ignore the original cast and hire people who have never done anything for the franchise before that.

Despite all of that, I was giving Scoob! the benefit of the doubt because I really wanted this movie to be good. I wanted this movie to open up the potential for more major Scooby projects. And while this movie did well financially I find myself so disappointed that after 16 years this is what we got.

Since I hated almost everything about this movie I’m gonna break it up into a numbered list (otherwise I’ll be ranting endlessly).

#1: This movie fails at telling a story.

When the trailer was dropped I remember being like, “Great. Lets recycle the whole Scoob and Shag friendship as a central narrative. Not like they’ve done that a million times before.” And then next thing you know, they’re on the Falcon Fury and I was so not excited. That was two plot-lines they’ve played with before and I can’t remember the last time anyone cared about the Blue Falcon. It’s one of the weaker movies and nobody talks about that one episode of MI that he’s in.

But again, I was going to let it slide because it’s still possible to create a good story out of something recycled.

The movie opens up with them when they were kids and I was already bummed because this movie is taking place in present times and not the 70′s or the 80′s. They allude to the fact that Shaggy enjoys stuff from that time period (while he’s scrolling through a smartphone) but that’s not the same. This concept bugged me for the rest of the movie because the majority of scenes where the gang is solving something they just Google it and the the scene is over. As opposed to it taking place before the internet and writers would have to get creative. And while I love the gang as kids because when it’s done in the show they have so much charm and life the beginning scenes are kinda pointless and don’t establish anything major. I think they were trying to show that the gang have been really close since they were little but it doesn’t come off that way. Not to mention the whole scene with the gang together feels really stiff and I was salty that Shaggy wasn’t wearing a Commander Cool costume instead of his Blue Falcon outfit.

At this point I was waiting for the character conflict to be introduced because that’s a key convention in every Scooby movie. There’s always a man in a mask to chase but that’s not where the story comes together. The story comes from some sort internal conflict within the characters.

The phantom dinosaurs in Legend of the Phantosaur are awesome but that’s not what the movie is about. It’s about Shaggy overcoming his own internal hurdles.

That’s been a consistent pattern in the best of the Scooby films (even all four of the live action ones do this) and I was waiting for it to be identified. And then next thing I know we’re twenty minutes into the movie and I’m not sure what it’s even about. The scene where the gang talk about wanting to become a legitimate business happens so fast and it took me like five minutes to be like, “Wait is this our conflict?” A fight between the gang about Shaggy and Scooby’s usefulness to the cause? (Which is also a recycled plot but whatever.) Their fight happens so fast and isn’t taken all that seriously so Shag and Scoob’s anger seems more played for a laugh than anything else.

But then they cut to the bowling alley and the two of them seem genuinely upset. And I can’t help but think if you had let the earlier scene escalate into an actual argument that I would have bought the hurt feelings. But then none of it matters because Shag and Scoob are immediately attacked and rescued by the Blue Falcon and someone’s OC. And when the rest of the gang find out they instantly feel bad and so I guess the tension between the gang wasn’t supposed to be the central conflict.

Now it’s back to being about Shaggy and Scooby and their millionth time being the chosen one.

Shaggy becomes pretty upset because Scooby is getting into the whole superhero thing and isn’t giving Shag a second thought. But the thing is, none of this was built up. The villain and Simon Cowell tell Shag he isn’t special and both of those times aren’t even remotely emotional. They briefly mention that Shag has some self confidence issues and that turns into him getting mad at Scooby for taking off his collar and playing hero. Ignoring the fact that this is not in character at all it’s clear that the story is now forcing conflict because we’re 45 minutes into the movie and all we’ve done is slapstick.

Shaggy and Scooby’s falling out is ridiculous because they’ve only been mad at each other for like ten minutes of the whole movie so there aren’t any stakes at all. You know they’re gonna make up because this fight came out of nowhere and wasn’t built up at all. Shag and the gang reuniting isn’t emotional at all and Shaggy breaking up the fight could have been so much better if it was just done better.

And that’s how this whole movie is, this plot had the potential to be great scenes could have gotten something from me but nothing is built up and it can’t stay consistent.

By the final battle of the film we’ve only had two things resembling character arcs in Shag and the Blue Falcon and neither of them have any weight. The movie tells us what we already know, that Shaggy is indeed useful to the gang and I just want this movie to be over.

And I guess because they wanna tug on your heartstrings the writers threw in a little self-sacrifice. And I’m not against that at all I think that’s a good resolution to the arc they were trying to give Shaggy but the thing is there’s no stakes or tension in the scene. It just happens and we’re meant to be sad about it but I can’t because nobody else in the scene seems to think it’s all that depressing besides Scooby. And like two minutes later the conflict is resolved and we get our obligatory dance party at the end.

That whole thing is not a story, nothing is really accomplished by the end and nobody has really gone anywhere.

There was no Point A which takes us to Point B which brings us to Point C. This was an insane labyrinth of lines running through as many points as they could and then calling it a day. There was no natural progression and none of the conflicts presented even mattered because they were immediately resolved anyway. That makes sense for a TV show but this is a feature length film. I honestly could not believe they were going to release that in theaters because there is no way it’s worth the money.

It was so devoid of the Scooby-Doo charm and this movie felt more lifeless than anything I’ve watched in a long time.

#2: The movie does a bad job of portraying the gang’s friendship.

One of the fandom’s favorite parts of the Scooby-Doo franchise is the friendship between the gang and the way their characters interact.

But in this movie they behave more like coworkers than anything else. They try to play up the gang feeling guilty and missing the guys but it’s really not convincing. And it’s clear that the fight was more or less to contribute to Velma, Daphne and Fred’s story rather than the whole gang. They spend most of their scenes talking about the mystery or what Shaggy and Scooby would be doing if they were there. The one time in the movie where I can buy them being best friends is when we watch that accidentally took a video instead of a selfie. I thought that was really cute and showed the gang’s dynamic effectively.

The end of the movie where Shaggy is supposedly sealed in the Underworld forever is so underwhelming because Scooby is the only one reacting. Like that’s supposed to be their best friend of ten years who they don’t think they’ll ever see again and they barely bat an eyelash until they go to comfort Scooby.

My first thought was, “There is no way the gang would just let Shaggy sacrifice himself.” And I kept wondering why no one else was trying to stop him or hold him back.

It’s annoying because I like when the whole gang’s relationship a key part of the plot rather than just Shaggy and Scooby + the other three who are also here.

#3: The villain and the Blue Falcon are pointless.

You could have taken Brian and Dick Dastardly out of the movie and replaced them with anyone and the movie would not have changed at all.

The Blue Falcon squad add nothing to the story and are mainly just there for ......nostalgia I guess??? But nobody even remembers the Blue Falcon???

The scenes with Dastardly are easily the worst parts because he’s just a copy-paste villain who sometimes says semi relatable things and it’s meant to be hilarious. His whole plan to open the Underworld just to get his dog back could have been interesting but obviously it wasn’t because nothing is properly built up in this movie.

Their first mistake was immediately revealing who their villain was right off the bat. I won’t be salty that they used actual supernatural forces because Scooby has done that plenty of times. I am salty that they just up and tell you who the puppetmaster is without any goal at anonymity which just goes against everything Scooby is about.

And they’ve done this multiple times. Whenever real supernatural forces are brought into the mix that does change anything because the forces are almost always being controlled by a man in a mask. This sticks to the Scooby belief that the real evil in our world comes from man and not fictional monsters.

#4: This movie’s presentation is not good.

I will quickly say that I actually liked Shaggy’s design in the movie even though Mod Silas already drew Shag with a long sleeve under his shirt and I think that’s a lot better looking. Whatever, I thought he was cute.

I was talking about how stiff the opening scenes felt, well the whole movie looks pretty stiff as well.

The character designs are distracting (every girl in this movie with their hair down looks like they’re just wearing a wig it looks so bad I don’t understand hair hasn’t looked back in animation for like a decade) and the animation is pretty sloppy. The directing and camera movements also don’t make any half the time and only make everything more jarring. I have nothing against CG animation but I feel like this movie was trying to be 2D in a 3D space and and was just not working out.

Also the voice acting in the movie is really not good. Like idk how this movie managed to get a bad performance out of these pretty renowned actors but none of them sound like they wanna be there or even really care. Which is funny because if they had kept the original cast you know they would have given it 110% since they actually have passion playing these roles. If the performances were actually good I feel like I would have enjoyed the movie a little more.

They also play some standard pop songs and that confused me because they literally played the original theme song at the beginning. Like you guys have the What’s New theme which everyone loves, a plethora of other theme songs, and two Hex Girls songs you could have played.

When the dance party at the end happens Mod Silas pointed out that it was a wasted opportunity because instead of having the Blue Falcon be a DJ they could have just brought in the Hex Girls or Simple Plan.

But they didn’t do that and I honestly wonder if the people who made this movie care about Scooby-Doo at all.

#5: The things that I actually liked.

Again, I liked that scene where they do that cute selfie thing, I thought was adorable and accurately showed their dynamic.

I also liked that Daphne was the one to point out what Shag and Scoob contribute to the team because I’m biased.

When they address that Shag and Scoob are they ones that make sure the gang is eating I like that, I thought it was very in character and made a lot of sense.

I like when Captain Caveman showed up for literally no reason and was voiced by Tracy Morgan. Simply because it was so dumb I had to laugh.

I like the gang’s group hugs because those always showcase how tall Shag is compared to everyone and they all deserve a hug.

Any of the lines Fred said because they were the majority of the actually funny jokes in the movie.

The scene where Shag, Scoob and Daph are split off and she keeps getting her spare Scooby Snacks stolen by Scooby. I just love that trio for obvious reasons and it was the only part of the movie where I felt happy.

At the end when Shaggy yells at the gang and tells them what to do because I just always like it when he does that, it always throws the rest of the gang off and it’s funny.

The scene where they unmask Dastardly and it’s Simon Cowell and then they unmask Cowell and it’s Dastardly again. Like the smartest joke the movie had.

The Hex Girls poster at the carnival because it tricked me into thinking we’d see them at some point.

I liked DynoMutt, I though his design was cool and he got the other half of the actually funny jokes.

When Blue Falcon does that phone gag and is all like, “Adventure is calling!!” And the scene is supposed to be exciting but then Shag immediately is like, “No thanks.” I thought that was in character and pretty funny before being taken back because conflicts are resolved instantly in this movie.

Conclusion:

When you’re passionate with something as underground as Scooby-Doo you find yourself getting very protective of the legacy it leaves behind.

Granted this franchise has always had some black marks on it’s record but that’s to be expected since it’s a 50 year-old series.

Scoob was going to bring Scooby-Doo back into the limelight after such a long time remaining on CN or Boomerang respectively. And was just so devoid of the passion that even MI had, it felt like more of a cash grab than anything else. And it bums me out because there are so many good things that we could have gotten from an animated theatrical release.

But instead we got an hour and forty-five minutes of nothing and that isn’t what Scooby deserves at all. I can only hope that someone will want to try again and this time, they’ll actually care.

(Feel free to share your own thoughts on the movie and maybe discuss point I made that you agree/disagree with.)

#mod ninja #scoob!#the disappointments in 2020 just keep wracking up #not to mention this movie was actually surprisingly boring since there was no tension #most of the time we were comparing it to phantosaur and it just made us more pained #seriously i don't think i wanna watch that movie ever again

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twokinkybeans · 4 years ago

Text

Stark On Ice 6: Epilogue [Starker]

Read here on AO3!

Chapter 6: Epilogue

Peter sighs as he laces up his skates and pulls the zipper of the Midtown Ice Arena-themed vest a little higher. He already hears the loud, happy noise coming from the locker rooms. It’s not like he didn’t teach any classes during Celebrity Spin-Off, but it’s good to have more time for his students again. “Mr. Parker, hi!” Peter turns around to see a young girl emerging from the locker room with a big, broad smile on her face. “You have to check out my double axel. I finally mastered the landing!” She’s beaming with happiness, and it warms Peter’s heart to see her enthusiasm. Before the TV show, she’d been nearly there- just… Just the final details had needed some work. “Don’t show me before you finish a proper warm-up though, go skate five laps first and do the regular routine. Can’t wait to see it!” His encouraging words reach her, and with a big smile, she sets foot on the ice to prepare herself for today’s class. Slowly, more and more students drop in, and before he knows it, the ice is rather filled. The next hour simply flies by.

Tony stares at the man presenting the current progress of the new project. Tony isn’t sure he even heard a word the man said. He never quite realized just how much he despises working as the CEO of Stark Industries. It’s tiring, having to make stupid business deals all the time. It’s not like the results are any good. He never really cared, but… Oh well. Ever since he started to care for Peter, he’s begun to care for other things in his life too. A slight smile plays on his lips when he remembers Happy’s face when he gave the man a raise that doubled his salary. He earned it, and Tony is done with being a greedy billionaire. He wants to do something else. His fingers itch to throw everything he has overboard and make a run for it. He doesn’t know what he’ll be heading for, though. He has no plan. No idea. He’s never done something else, so how is he supposed to know?

“Mr. Stark, I would-” “Wait,” Tony sighs and shakes his head. “Look, boy, it isn’t you. I bet your presentation is wonderful and that the progress is going according to plan- few bumps here and there, yada yada. I, however, won’t be in charge of this deal.” The surprised echo going through the room is everything. Tony eyes the man’s name sign and grins. “Michael, you’ve been working hard on this project. You know the revenue streams better than I do. If you want, I’ll leave you in charge to execute any decision related to this project.” The boy in front of the other people has a hard time to keep from crying. His eyes teary- filled with the recognition he’s been wanting so much. “T-Thank you, Mr. Stark, I don’t know what I did, but I would very happily accept the offer.” he stammers. Tony smirks. “It’s yours, fella.”

Michael takes a deep breath before he continues his presentation. Nervous but bold when he tells the clients what his plans are. Tony nods to himself. That was the right call. He made someone very happy here, and he doesn’t have to bother with it. He realizes he finally starts to trust people again. His employees. His friends, too. All because of Peter Parker with his ever-be-damned innocent puppy eyes. He wishes he could see Peter again soon. The boy is immensely busy with teaching and catching up with his YouTube channel and own training. Even though Celebrity Spin-Off may have eliminated them for the race - leaving Clint and MJ to win - the bookings for Dancing On Ice have been off the charts. Everyone wants to get a glimpse of Peter Parker with their own eyes. Tony wishes he could spend more time with his boyfriend, but he’s immensely proud of how the boy is doing. He’s famous, famous for being himself and the thought alone has Tony feel proud.

They haven’t seen each other in three weeks now. But Tony intends to surprise him tonight. Happy happily volunteered to be their chauffeur, and the restaurant had been more than excited to rearrange some tables to squeeze them in. Ned and MJ are a part of the secret plan, too, making sure Peter has the night off from something else.

“So, I’ve been meaning to ask you something for a long time now.” “Oh?” “Why aren’t you pursuing the Olympics? I may not be a professional, but I know enough about figure skating now to see you have the potential.” Tony’s voice is gentler than usual. Peter presses his lips together and casts his gaze down. The man knows he’s treading on thin ice and it has Peter feeling understood and more at ease simultaneously. He knows he doesn’t owe anyone an explanation. A simple “I don’t feel like it” would suffice. Peter wants Tony to know, though. He’s his boyfriend, for fuck’s sake.

“My parents… They were rather famous pair skaters—multiple Olympic gold medals. My mom, she… The stress of having to upkeep her physique, athletic capabilities, relationship, and me-” Peter pauses for a short second, taking a deep breath. “It drove her to a massive panic attack during a show and she fell. Broke her ankle. Couldn’t skate again on the same level. It drove her insane. She got behind the wheel, drunkenly so, and crashed herself and my father into a tree in Ohio.” Peter’s voice wavers, and he shakes his head slightly. “I don’t… I don’t want to end up like them. I want to enjoy the sports. She grew to hate it. I couldn’t… I need this in my life. I can’t bear the thought of losing it. I’m good here. Shows, teaching. It’s still professional, and yet at the end of the day, I can still have a game night with Ned and stuff my face with a way too big pizza.”

Tony nods. Unsure what to say. Peter gives him a faint smile. “You don’t have to say anything. It’s been fifteen years now. Although it’s something I carry with me, it’s not… It’s not something that I’m allowing to dictate my life. Honestly, I’m having a grand old time, Tones.” “I’m so sorry, though,” Tony whispers and opens his arms. Peter hums appreciatively and crawls into his lap- straddling the thickened thighs. All these months of harsh training show on Tony. “I wish they were still here to see what an amazing young man you’ve become.”

Peter scoffs, but his gaze betrays his pride. “Thanks,” he whispers and kisses Tony’s forehead. “Now, what about your parents? They left a mark on you too, didn’t they?” Tony shrugs. “My dad’s a prick. My mom never knew how to deal with that. They died before I could properly build a bond with her.” “How’d they die?” “Suspicious car accident. It’s never been confirmed exactly what or who did it.” “I’m sorry…” “Nah, honestly, as much as I miss the idea of them- I don’t miss them. They were never there for me when I needed them. I wish I could’ve had loving parents, but hey, at least they left me with a multi-billion-dollar company.” “I always forget how rich you are.” “Wanna be spoiled?” “Ugh, no. We’re good like this.” “Good.”

The both of them fall silent for a good minute after that. That is until Peter cocks his head and innocently brings his drink to his lips. “So-” he starts “-MJ and I have a plan for a new video for our channel.” Tony knows by the tone of the boy’s voice that it is something that Tony won’t necessarily like all that much. Or maybe he will. It’s about him, that’s for sure. “Oh?” He simply says. Peter chuckles. “Well, we figured it’d be fun to star you as a guest? People will love to see more of us skating together, and the fact that you’re Tony Stark only makes it better.” “What about MJ?”

Peter’s smirk widens, and he grabs his phone that had been facedown onto the edge of the table. Tony groans. “Oh God, you got it all planned out, didn’t ya?” “Of course I did. Who do you think I am? MJ is in charge of all our social media and editing, but I? I make the scripts. Skating is much more than just a simple dance, eh? It’s a choreo. A story.” “Sure thing.” Peter scoffs and shakes his head as he scrolls through his phone, probably to find the right document or whatever it is he wants to show his boyfriend. “Thought I taught you more these past months,” he jokes. Tony chuckles. “I’m still very much a rookie, Pete. Your world of figure skating, I- haven’t figured it out yet.” “Oh God, that’s the worst pun ever.” “Shush, I’m having an ice day.” Peter snorts and shoves his phone forward. “Maybe my choreo will shut your mouth.”

Tony can’t help biting down his lower lip as he spills his last joke. “Axel-lent.” Peter sends him a death glare after that, but the playful sparkle in his eyes betrays that he loves the convo. He nods at his phone, and Tony takes the hint. Dropping more jokes would be overkill now. (Yes, he knows more puns, and he won’t ever admit to Peter that he stayed up until 3 am a few nights ago to Google them). He squints his eyes at the screen, cursing under his breath as his fingers slide down the screen to lower the brightness. As much as he doesn’t think he’s that old yet, his eyesight doesn’t agree. Peter, if he even noticed, doesn’t comment on it.

“I- Is this Romeo and Juliet?” “Well-” “MJ IS PARIS?” “Isn’t it romantic!” “Romeo and Juliet never came off as romantic to me, to be frank. Those teens had an unhealthy obsession and-” “Tony, I love Prokofiev’s music. You’re gonna have to bear with it. Be glad I didn’t cast you as Juliet.” “Did you steal this from that Netflix show? I know Justin’s a hottie, but-” Peter blushes a bright red, and Tony grins. “Does that mean you agree?” “Yes. Of course, I agree. But no, this choreo is very different. They were pair skating for the competition, and we’ll be making a little play. On ice. Plus, it’s not even the same song.” “Alright, alright. Agreed on Prokofiev.” “Good.”

Tony smiles as Peter continues to explain the rest of the choreo to him. The costumes he has in mind. Tony doesn’t like admitting things to himself- especially not when they’re good feelings. But he has to confess he likes this. Peter. Skating. Even acting, in a way. It unlocks a part of him that he’s never quite experienced before. Obviously, his job allows for minimal creativity, but it’s nothing, absolutely nothing, like this.

A little over 11 months ago, the broadcasters asked Tony to participate in Celebrity Spin-Off; an annual TV series where celebrities get paired up with a professional figure skater and compete against each other. Well, he’d laughed in their faces, wondering why they’d even ask. Were they really that stupid? He had better things to do. “If you can find me a male skater who lets me lead, I’m in,” he’d scoffed sarcastically to brush them off.

He’s still not sure why they took his answer seriously, but they had. Tony Stark doesn’t back out of a promise, though. So, here he is, lacing up his skates to record a YouTube video with his sweet, enthusiastic, now 22-year-old boyfriend and his bestie; dressed in a silver-lined tight suit to play Romeo out of all possible characters.

He’s never felt more alive.

(Especially not at 7 AM)

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choupichoups · 6 years ago

Photo

Blue [2/2]

Prompt: soulmate au // “please tell me this is safe”(...) // “i'm cold”(...)

Lucas has seen colour ever since he can remember.

His memories before meeting Eliott pale in comparison to everything that comes after. But he’d never ever utter a word of that observation— god knows his soulmate doesn’t need anymore fodder for his gigantic ego.

Besides, how can he have room to remember anything else when everyone just loves to remind him all about the incident— as if the idea of Lucas crying over his first kiss is a perpetually hilarious concept.

He’s perfected the blasé, I was five, he often uses to defend himself.

“Please tell me this is safe,” he says, stepping over a frozen tree root as he follows Eliott deeper into the woods.

“This is safe.”

Lucas watches him hop down an icy slope, long legs able to step over the deep grove without risk of falling and breaking his head open— which, yeah, no, Lucas is not going any further. “Please tell me this is safe, without lying.”

“You’re really demanding, you know that?” Eliott looks up at him from where he’s waiting on lower ground. “You don’t trust me?”

“Uh, not really, no.”

Eliott laughs, moving closer to where Lucas’s stood at the edge of the boulder. “Come on, I got you.”

“What if you slip?”

“I won’t.”

“What if I slip?”

“I won’t let that happen.”

Lucas sighs, bouncing in his spot as he weighs his options. “Eliott, just come back up here, please,” he says, voice soft as he peeks over the steep edge and loses all his nerve. “Let’s get back to the guys.” His mind plays out a scene akin to a horror movie, where one wrong step would send Eliott rolling off the edge of some hidden cliff, or Lucas would be standing under the wrong tree and an icicle would drop down to stab him to death. Call him a coward all you want but it’s really fucking dark out here and Lucas has never claimed to be brave.

The playfulness on Eliott’s expression softens, and he reaches up, straining until he’s able to grab one of Lucas’ hands in a reassuring grip. “I swear nothing will happen, Lucas.” He runs his thumb over the back of Lucas’ hand, smiling up at him with those endearing wrinkles at the corners of his eyes. “When have I ever let you fall?”

At seven years of age, Lucas’ parents fight so much that they don’t even notice their only son sneaking out to escape the loud, loud yelling.

He’s climbed into the play structure at the park his mama used to always take him to— back when she’d been less stressed out, back when papa had still eaten dinner with the two of them every night.

Lucas curls himself into a ball, hiding tear streaked cheeks into the crook of his elbows. He’s not necessarily crying about the fight, he doesn’t understand what they’re talking about, it’s just that he’s really scared right now.

He’s at the highest point of the play structure and he kind of wants to go down but every way back down to the ground looks too scary. He doesn’t want to fall and die. Mama used to always pick him up when he gets stuck like this, but she doesn’t even know he’s here.

“Lucas?”

He looks up at the sound of his name and sees Eliott down below, holding a basketball in his arms.

“Hi,” Lucas says lamely, sniffing as he wipes at his tears.

Eliott gasps. “Why are you crying? Wait for me, I’ll come get you!”

“No!” Lucas stops him, afraid that both of them would get stuck if Eliott climbs up after him.

“What?” The basketball falls uselessly on the sandy ground. One of Eliott’s legs is already poised to step up the ladders. “Why not?”

“I can’t get down,” Lucas whispers, feeling more tears fill up his eyes. “I wanna go down!”

“Oh.” Eliott frowns, jumping easily onto the second level of the structure, contemplates a bit, and then climbs onto the third level. “Come, give me your hand.”

Lucas shakes his head. Eliott looks too far away, Lucas will die.

“Come on, Lulu. I got you.” Eliott’s reaching upwards, both hands open for Lucas to take. “I promise I won’t let you fall.”

Lucas jumps off the rock and Eliott catches him easily.

“See? That wasn’t so bad.” Eliott grins, carefully setting Lucas down on a patch of snow, ensuring that no ice is hidden underneath the powdery surface.

“Revisit the topic when it’s time for us to get back up and I can’t climb over the damn rock.”

Eliott ruffles his hair, chuckling. “I’ll take care of everything.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Lucas scoffs, grumpily kicking small blocks of ice away from his path as they continue walking. “How much further?”

“Not much longer, your highness.”

Lucas rolls his eyes, ducking under the branch that Eliott pulls out of the way for him.

Eliott’s sneaking glances at him, eyes curved slightly in a hint of a smile so Lucas puts in the effort to pull different faces for each time his aggravating boyfriend looks back. It gets him happy little giggles from Eliott and Lucas has to bite his lip against a smile. He can’t have Eliott thinking that he’s enjoying this ridiculous trek in the woods now.

“Thank you for coming with me,” Eliott says, snapping a particularly stubborn branch off one of the trees when it wouldn’t bend. Lucas could have just dodged it himself but he’s not about to argue with Eliott’s adorable and sometimes (always) successful attempts at chivalry. “I know it’s late, I really wanted to take you out here earlier but the guys wouldn’t leave us alone.”

“You could have told me, I would’ve kindly asked them to fuck off for you,” Lucas says, walking faster when he sees Eliott cupping his hands around his mouth to blow warm air into them. In a weird twist of events, Lucas’s the one who’d been smart enough to bring his gloves for the cabin trip and Eliott had somehow managed to pack three winter jackets but had jack all for toques and mittens.

“I know.” Eliott’s laughing again, stuffing his hands in his pockets to keep them away from the biting cold. Lucas stumbles clumsily over the bumpy forest floor, almost falling into Eliott’s back and startling his boyfriend into turning around. “Hey, you okay?”

“Yeah, fine, I just—” Lucas gives up trying to explain himself, reaching out to wrap both of his gloved hands around one of Eliott’s freezing ones. “Should’ve borrowed Yann’s gloves before taking me here.”

Eliott shrugs. “I was hoping you’d do this actually so… success, I guess.”

Lucas squints at him. That’s total bullshit. “Just admit you didn’t think of it and go.”

Eliott raises his hands in surrender, laughter loud amongst the silent trees. Lucas grabs his hand back in his hold. “What do I do with my other hand then?”

A side eye is all he gets. “Suffer.”

“Aw, come on.”

“I’ll switch to your other side later.”

“You’re so sweet sometimes that I forget you’re the biggest bitch I know.”

“Oh yeah? This bitch is done warming your hands then.” Lucas lets go of him, sealing the deal by lagging a few steps behind.

“I’m kidding!” Eliott jogs backwards, making the dumb gesture somehow look cute. Lucas scowls at himself, disgusted at how in love he is with this goofball. “I’m kidding, please hold my hand, Lulu.”

Lucas makes sure to heave his biggest sigh, “I guess if I have to.”

But Eliott doesn’t resume with the banter, only dipping his head down to Lucas’ eye level and nudging his cheek with his nose like the overgrown puppy he is. “I mean it. Thank you for coming.”

Lucas looks up at him when Eliott pulls away, hands clenching tighter around Eliott’s fingers— now toasty warm.

“You know I’ll follow you everywhere, dumbass.”

Lucas is fourteen when Eliott calls him at half past two in the morning, words indecipherable in between his heaving sobs. It’s a good thing they live close by, because nothing would have stopped Lucas from pulling his shoes on and running right over.

They’re in Eliott’s bed the morning after, sitting cross legged from each other as Eliott fiddles with the many tubs of paint in his collection. Lucas watches him silently, offering a small nod when Eliott swears under his breath and leaves the room, promising he’d be right back.

They still haven’t talked about what happened the night before.

Lucas flops back down on the bed, snuggling closer into the large hoodie Eliott’s lent him after his shower— his soulmate hadn’t even tried to look for something that would fit Lucas better.

“This should be good enough,” Eliott says as he returns, tone slightly giddy, and when Lucas looks up he catches the tiny smile gracing Eliott’s features. Lucas sighs, relief spreading over his chest like a soothing balm— it’s definitely progress from how Eliott had been acting last night.

“What’s that for?” Straightening up, Lucas nods towards the small bottle of nail polish in Eliott’s grip.

“Remember when I asked for your help last month?”

“For your project?”

“Yeah!” Eliott jumps back into bed, pulling Lucas closer by his legs. Lucas would have kicked him in the face for it if the memory of Eliott’s tears still wasn’t so fresh in his mind. “I need your hands for the cover photo.”

“So you’re using me as a free hand model.”

“I’ll buy you ice cream after.” Eliott looks up, shooting him a quick wink.

Great. So they’re still not talking about it.

Eliott folds the sleeves of the hoodie twice over to get the material away from Lucas’ hands. They work in comfortable silence— Eliott trying his hardest to make the blue nail polish look smooth and even while Lucas opts to staring at him unashamedly.

He’s kind of missed Eliott, actually.

Eliott has started high school already while Lucas’s still trudging along in middle school, pretending his handsome dork of a shadow isn’t a gaping absence in his everyday life. It’s not like they’ve grown apart; they see each other out of school sometimes (when Eliott’s not drowning in homework) and they text each other a lot of times.

Still, it’s different from how they’ve always been inseparable during their younger years.

“I went to the doctor yesterday.”

Lucas perks up, nodding as Eliott moves on to painting his other hand. But when the other boy doesn’t continue, Lucas decides to give him a verbal cue. “Okay.”

Eliott blinks, like he’s just remembering that he’d said something in the first place. “Something weird happened last week.”

Lucas doesn’t quite get how it relates to the doctor thing but he lets it be. “Okay.”

“I was invincible, Lucas,” Eliott explains vaguely and despite the positive words he’s using, his tone implies otherwise. Which makes sense, since Lucas vividly remembers Mrs. Demaury telling Lucas that Eliott hadn’t been feeling well at all the past week. “And then I wasn’t.”

“Okay.” The urge to hold Eliott’s hands in his is almost overwhelming but his nails haven’t dried yet and he really doesn’t want to ruin Eliott’s hard work.

“It’s like… my mind was going to so many places.” Eliott replaces the cap on the nail polish, letting it roll on the sheets between them as he talks. “But my body can’t move.” There’s a slight tremor in Eliott’s hands and Lucas decides fuck it, to hell with the goddamn nail polish. He reaches out and intertwines their fingers together, squeezing the hands in his when he feels Eliott hold onto him a little harder.

“Okay.”

“I didn’t— I was feeling everything and nothing all at once and I just wanted to sleep.” Eliott closes his eyes, his grip on Lucas bordering on painful but the latter doesn’t stray from it. “But I wasn’t fucking sleeping.” He lifts their joined hands up to his forehead, head ducked down as if in prayer. “This,” Eliott continues, knocking his head lightly over their hands. “This was elsewhere and I couldn’t fucking control it.”

Lucas pulls their hands towards him, brings them to his lips. He places the lightest of kisses over Eliott’s knuckles, willing for him to look up. “Okay.”

“I’m bipolar, Lucas,” Eliott whispers, words shivering out of his lips. “It’s not okay.”

There’s a pinprick behind his eyes, tears stubbornly wanting to make their appearance despite Lucas’ best efforts. Still, he clenches his teeth against them. “Maybe. But it doesn’t change a thing.”

“It changes everything.”

The fact that Eliott uses the same words that Lucas’ father had used a couple of years ago, against his mama, has him losing the battle. The tears he’d been holding back fall from his eyes and his heart lurches painfully when Eliott’s immediate reaction is to wipe at them gently with his thumb.

“No,” he says, just as soft. “It doesn’t, not for me. Not for us.” Lucas can be anything in his life— he’s young and brash and has his whole life ahead of him. He will not be his father. “I’ll be right here, as always.”

“It’s going to be hard.”

“Things don’t stay easy forever anyway.”

“You weren’t there last week, it was so bad.”

“I’ll learn.”

“But—”

“Are you trying to get rid of me?” He says, brows raising in accusation. It gets a small huff of laughter from Eliott and Lucas smiles at the sound. “Cause give it up, I’m not going anywhere.”

“What if I go where you can’t follow?”

“Impossible.” He doesn’t ever want to think about what that means. “Where you go, I go.”

“Fuck,” Eliott breathes out, shaking his head. “Fuck fifteen.”

Lucas’s only confused for a second before Eliott leans over and captures his lips in a kiss. He’s swear to god not expecting it and certainly not when Eliott tumbles them back into the sheets, tongue hot and insistent against his closed lips. Not knowing what else to do, he allows Eliott in and immediately after can’t decide whether it’s the best or worst decision of his life. Either way, the very telling moan that claws its way out of his throat is enough to have him mortified.

You see, Lucas has never had anyone but Eliott and his experience in this area is absolute rock bottom as Eliott hasn’t actually kissed him on the lips ever since that time when he was five. And he’d cried back then.

He has half a mind to demand where Eliott learned to kiss like this because he’s pretty sure his soulmate hasn’t had anyone but Lucas either or he most certainly will be kicking him where it hurts. But all thoughts of demanding anything flies out the window when Eliott’s hands make their way under his borrowed hoodie and, well, just no, Lucas has to mentally prepare for this beforehand please and thank you.

“Wait, wait, wait,” he gasps out, finally finding the strength to turn away and use his jelly limbs to push Eliott off.

“You okay?” Eliott asks, all worried like he hadn’t just attempted to murder Lucas with his tongue.

“Yeah,” he says quickly, moving so that he’s face down on the bed with a hand over his pounding chest. Jesus. “Just, wait, I think I’m having a heart attack.”

Eliott falls into the pillows laughing; unencumbered, bellowing, genuine— happy.

He wipes his half dried nails over the sheets in revenge.

“Lucas!”

“Why is it so fucking cold?” Lucas mumbles mostly to himself. Blowing out a breath upwards and seeing the cloud of white in its wake irrationally pisses him off even more.

“I told you to bring a jacket,” Eliott says, nonchalant as he ambles through, all warm in his shirt and hoodie and two fucking jackets.

“I did,” Lucas retorts. “I just didn’t know we were going to fucking Antartica, Eliott.”

His boyfriend outright laughs at his discomfort. Lucas pouts, carefully stepping around slippery patches of ice as he shivers in misery. If Eliott has to take him to the hospital for hypothermia after this, he’ll see who’s laughing then.

Everything around him goes pitch black all of a sudden and Lucas stops, breath halting its steady rhythm as he looks up. His eyes haven’t adjusted yet so he can’t even see Eliott’s outline in the dark.

“Shit.” He hears Eliott from somewhere ahead of him and Lucas tries to walk over but he bumps into a tree two steps into it, feet sinking into a fragile glass of ice. The crunching sound it makes under his feet is jarring. “Lucas? Stay where you are, okay? Don’t move.”

And yeah that’s some smart thinking right there. He’s glad at least one of them still has common sense.

Eliott’s phone battery has probably ran out. Lucas’ phone is back at the cabin, charging, so he can’t even do anything to help fix this. His brain starts coming up with horror movie scenarios again and Lucas thumps his head against the tree, turning around to lean his back against it as he waits for Eliott.

“Baby?” He hears Eliott’s voice again, still from the same direction as earlier.

“Right here,” he answers, thoughts of hypothermia taking a backseat for now.

There’s a light click from somewhere on his left and Lucas can breathe properly again. The path in front of him is lit with the flashlight in Eliott’s hand and Lucas wastes no time running towards him.

Eliott doesn’t make fun of him when Lucas jumps into his arms, only bending down a little so that Lucas doesn’t strain so much to reach him.

“I’m sorry, baby.” Eliott murmurs into his hair. “I forgot my phone has shit battery life.”

Lucas laughs at that. “It’s okay.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, I wasn’t scared.” Lucas doesn’t need to see Eliott’s thumb moving over the flashlight to know what his jackass soulmate is about to do. “But I will murder you myself if you shut that light off right now and no one will find your body out here.”

He feels Eliott’s laughter from over his head but Eliott obediently keeps the light on. Thank fucking god.

Now that the crisis is over, Lucas starts to shiver from the cold again and he’s beginning to very seriously think that he’s actually going to die that same night when his body is wrapped in immediate warmth. His head snaps up, and Eliott smiles down at him, outer jacket now placed over Lucas’ shoulders instead.

“You’ll be cold,” Lucas protests weakly, not really wanting to lose the blessed warmth but also not wanting Eliott to feel as cold as he’d been earlier. “Take it back.”

“Do you really think I need two jackets to stay warm?”

“Hm?” Lucas still hasn’t moved from his position against Eliott’s chest, arms wrapped securely around the latter’s waist so he doesn’t move away.

“I knew you’d be too lazy to dress properly so I brought this for you,” he says, rubbing circles around Lucas’ back over the jacket.

“Oh.”

“What? You doubted me?” Eliott pulls back, lifting Lucas’ face by the chin. “How many times do I have to tell you that I’ll take care of you before you drill it into that head of yours?”

Lucas presses his lips together but his efforts hold no candle over the enormous smile that tugs them apart.

At fifteen, Lucas quickly gets exhausted by the attention he’s receiving in high school.

He knows the bulk of the interest comes from being one half of a soulmate duo. He doesn’t exactly shout it out to the rooftops but the rumour mill is brutal around high school. Everybody somehow knows who’s got the syndrome or not. It doesn’t even help him that Eliott makes it no secret just who exactly Lucas’ other half is. Ironically enough, it only makes things worse.

“I’m having a party this Friday,” Robert, or whatever his name is, leans against the locker beside Lucas’, unperturbed even when Lucas treats his presence like air. “If you and your friends wanna come.”

What Lucas wants is for what’s his face to leave him the fuck alone. “No.”

“You answered that too quickly, I think you might wanna think about it for a bit longer.”

Lucas slams his locker shut, spares the nuisance some eye contact for a few seconds longer than usual, and reconfirms his answer. “No.”

He hears Yann and the others coming up behind him and breathes out a sigh. Finally, some rescue— or so he thought.

“Hey man!” Arthur greets the guy behind Lucas while Basile looks starstruck. And, okay, Lucas understands the fascination; Robert is in his final year and is in one of the more popular cliques in school. Doesn’t change the fact that he’s fucking annoying, though.

Lucas looks at Yann with an expression he hopes is meaningful enough to get him to bail Lucas out.

But Yann doesn’t get it. Lucas’s seriously going to demote him from best friend status now.

“Fine,” Robert sighs, straightening up from the locker to loom infuriatingly close behind Lucas’ back. “I won’t hold it against you if you change your mind.”

“Change your mind about what?” Basile snaps out of his daze just in time to fuel the fire Lucas’s desperately trying to douse.

“Nothin—”

“Lucas says you guys wouldn’t be interested in a party this Friday?”

Fuck you, Robert.

“What?!” Basile exclaims, looking at Lucas all offended. The latter shrugs, remaining uninterested. Arthur gives him a subtle tap on the shoulder, widening his eyes in reprimand when Lucas looks over and they really need to calm down, it’s just a stupid party. There’s one practically every week.

“No, no.” Arthur takes over, pushing Lucas aside which means he now has to turn around and see Robert’s triumphant smirk. “He cracked his head on a wall this morning, we’ll definitely be there.”

“Cool. I’ll see you then.” And with that, Robert walks off— backwards. It doesn’t look half as attractive as when Eliott does it. Lucas barely resists flashing him the middle finger.

“Lucas!” Arthur turns to him, scandalized. “How could you turn that down?”

“It’s just a party.”

“It’s not just a party. That was Roden Caron inviting you, himself, just now. Are you crazy?”

“Whatever, you guys can go if you want. I’m staying home.”

“Pretty sure he won’t let us in without you,” Basile pipes up, eyes round and pleading.

Lucas turns to Yann, who’s been quiet for the entire conversation, only to see his best friend’s head tilted down, tapping aimlessly at his phone. He knows Yann and Emma are having a rough time with their relationship right now and guilt churns in Lucas’ stomach. He hasn’t exactly been acting the role of the best friend either, too preoccupied with the shift in his and Eliott’s relationship for the past year.

But maybe that dickhead Roden’s given him an opportunity to redeem himself a little.

“Yann,” Lucas calls out, Yann looking up at them only after he’s been directly addressed. “You up for some distraction on Friday?”

“I don’t know…”

“Come on, man.” Basile knocks him encouragingly on the shoulder. “There’ll be unlimited drinks for free! And hot girls!”

“Yeah! And I heard his parties are bomb,” Arthur pitches in, almost vibrating at the prospect of attending.

Yann meets Lucas’ eyes. “Eliott’s gonna be okay with this?”

“Uh.” Eliott probably wouldn’t want to go to a party hosted by some guy with a vendetta against him but Lucas can try. “I’ll ask if he wants to come.”

“No, no, no.” Basile takes Lucas’ phone away before he could do anything. “We are going to this party as single men.”

“We’re not single, though,” Yann retorts.

Basile pauses. “Okay, not single single but no significant others for the night.”

“Why?” Lucas doesn’t feel all that comfortable going without Eliott, for obvious reasons.

“When was the last time we all hung out together with just us?” Basile spreads his hands out quite dramatically, looking around to meet eyes with each one of them. Lucas concurs he doesn’t have a good answer to that. “Exactly.”

They all mumble disgruntled agreements, even Arthur who isn’t even in a serious relationship.

Lucas pockets his phone without asking Eliott to come with him. It’ll probably be fine anyway.

Except, of course, it’s not.

Yann’s shitfaced drunk on the couch two hours into arriving and Lucas, having stuck to him like a leech in order to prevent anything too disastrous from happening, is on his way to getting there as well. He listens to Yann’s moaning and groaning about not meaning to lie to Emma all the time but things are just so complicated.

Lucas sloppily pats him on the back, taking another swig at his beer until he realizes that the bottle is empty.

He should get more.

Getting up from the couch is a hassle— his legs feel too weak to support the rest of his body and his head seems to have cotton for brains.

He should stop drinking now.

Digging around his pockets, he walks towards the kitchen in hopes of finding a little peace and quiet— and two water bottles for him and Yann as well. He’s glad his cotton brains are at least half functional.

His hands finally reach into the correct pocket for his phone and he gleefully presses Eliott’s speed dial, excited to finally talk to his boyfriend after a long day without him. Eliott knows he’s at Roden’s party, having mentioned it offhandedly after Eliott complained about having to go to a classmate’s house, on a Friday night, to finish a group assignment.

Just as predicted, Eliott’s face soured at the mention of Roden but he shrugs it off, kissing Lucas goodbye with a teasing, “Don’t be too bored without me.”

And Lucas tried, really, but parties are just way too dull without his boyfriend around.

“Hey.” Eliott picks up from the other line, sounding sweet and sleepy.

Lucas realizes he doesn’t know what time it is. “I’m bored, Eliott.”

There’s a muffled chuckle and then, “I think it’s time for you to leave that lame party.”

“But the guys are still here?” He speaks slowly, trying not to slur his words. Eliott would get worried if he catches wind of how much Lucas has already drank.

“With you right now?”

Lucas looks around and spots Arthur and Basile engaged in a giant drinking game that looks a hair’s width away from being too much.

“No.”

“Then you can leave whenever you want.”

“Yeah… yeah,” he answers absently, leaning against the kitchen counter as he stares at the cupboards. Which one would hold the cups? He wants cold water from the fridge, not those stupid water bottles scattered around on the floor.

"Lucas?” There’s a lot of noise from Eliott’s line but Lucas can’t figure out what he’s doing at this time of the night. Or early morning. Whatever. “Hey, baby, are you okay?”

“Mhm.” He rubs his eyes with the back of his hand. “I think…” Drunk Lucas is too much of a disaster to be hanging around in public so he should probably go. “I’m—”

“Finally caught you.” There’s another voice nearby but Lucas understands that it’s not coming from his phone. He turns around, cursing in his head at the sight of Roden. He’s been doing so well avoiding the guy all night.

Lucas holds the phone tighter. “I’m just leaving,” he mumbles, trying to push past him to get out of the kitchen. Except Roden holds out an arm to block his path and it’s enough to confuse Lucas’ drunken state into staying put.

Eliott’s saying something from the other line but Roden picks the phone out of Lucas’ slack hold and ends the call. “You don’t have to.”

“I do.” Lucas attempts to leave again, only to realize that he still needs his phone back. He makes a grab for it but Roden pulls it out of reach. “Give it.”

“Get one more drink with me and I’ll let you go.” Roden gestures towards the two bottles of beer on the kitchen island.

Lucas shakes his head, he’s not drunk enough to be too stupid. “No, I wanna leave.”

“Come on, I just wanna talk.” Roden’s arms fall by his sides as he shrugs and Lucas’ eyes follow the movement.

“I don’t wanna talk.” Lucas snatches his phone back, pocketing it real quick. With that done, he tries for another escape but this time Roden’s hands grab him by the wrists, pressing him against the wall and this is getting really fucking frustrating.

“Fine, no talking. Let’s do something else then.”

Lucas twists around, trying to free himself enough to punch this imbecile in the balls. “Are you deaf or what?” He wants to yell but even that small attempt to raise his volume causes him a bout of dizziness. Shit, this would be the worst time to pass out. “I said I wanna go home. Get off me.”

“Come on, stop pretending it’s not boring, staying with just one person your whole life.”

He stops struggling for a second only to give Roden an incredulous look. Is this guy serious? He’s really going to go fake deep about soulmates with Lucas over here?

“None of your business.”

“I’m just trying to do you a favour, see?” Roden leans down, breathing over his neck. Lucas’ pulse spikes with the first strike of fear. “Maybe after this, you’ll even forget all about Demaury.”

The mention of Eliott’s name, in that mocking tone that Lucas is unfortunately too familiar with, brings out such sheer anger in him that Lucas manages to rip his hands away from Roden’s grip, punch him twice in his dumb, entitled face, and kick him in between the legs for good measure. He’s light headed by the time he’s done and Roden looks more furious than hurt, which doesn’t bode all that well for him, so Lucas makes a run for it.

As best as he can anyway. His knees are this close to buckling but Lucas holds onto that thread of adrenaline, hoping he’s going the correct way to the front doors.

When he gets out, the wind is comfortingly cold against his skin but he stutters in his steps— he can’t go home like this. His mom would worry and get even more stressed out. Raking shaky hands through his hair, he’s just about to stagger down the porch steps to figure things out on his walk home when Eliott, wide eyed and windswept, comes running into sight.

“Eliott?” Lucas sure hopes he’s not hallucinating right now or he’d be really worried for himself.

“Come here.” Eliott walks up to him and Lucas barely gets off the top step before Eliott’s arms are around him, embrace so tight it pulls him off the ground. “What the fuck was that, Lucas?”

“Huh?”

“The fucking phone call,” Eliott says carding one hand through Lucas’ messy hair. “I heard his voice and it just ended and—”

“I’m fine.” Lucas tries not to think about it or he might not be fine. “How did you get here?”

“I ran.”

“Fuck.” Lucas buries his face in Eliott’s neck. “Stop being so sweet, I’m gonna puke.”

“Pretty sure you’re gonna puke anyway.”

“Shut up.”

Eliott sets him down carefully, but Lucas can’t bring himself to walk another step. He’s run out of adrenaline since Eliott’s arrival and he’s reminded of how truly useless his body becomes when inebriated.

“Here.” Eliott stoops down in front of him, taking Lucas’ hands to wrap around his neck from behind. “Get on my back.”

“I’m sorry.” Lucas slumps against Eliott’s back, holding on when Eliott straightens back up. “You must be tired.”

“Never.”

Lucas cuddles closer, pressing his nose into Eliott’s hair. “Thank you.”

“I told you, Lulu.” Eliott turns his head and steals a little kiss. “I’ll be here to take care of you. Always.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re never going to a party without me again.”

“I know.”

“I’m gonna fucking kill Roden.”

Lucas snorts, “Don’t bother.”

“No, he’s gonna die on Monday.”

“Eliott.”

“You said we were almost there like, two hours ago,” Lucas says, mostly to be difficult. He’s starting to not mind the long walk in the deep, dark woods with Eliott. Except for the fact that, you know, they could die any minute now. But that’s no big deal.

“It’s been half an hour,” Eliott retorts with a scoff. “And we really are here this time. Careful, watch your steps.” He leads them up a soft mountain of snow and Lucas feels the wooden stairs buried deep under. It gets steadily brighter around them the higher they get, with the trees no longer shielding them from the night sky.

And wow, okay, maybe Eliott’s onto something over here.

High up as they are, Lucas sees nothing but an expanse of dark skies speckled with stars that are alive. Is that…?

“Meteor shower.” Eliott leans his chin on Lucas’ shoulder, watching his reaction closely. “It started about half an hour ago. I was worried we’d miss it.”

Lucas stands there with his mouth open, shaking his head in disbelief.

“How did you…” Lucas turns, laughing incredulously up at Eliott. “Did you make a deal with the devil? How do you do these things?” His eyes slide back up where the stars continue their mesmerizing dance in the dark. “Fuck.” He feels Eliott’s gaze still on him so Lucas nudges him with an elbow. “Why aren’t you watching it?”

“I’ve got something much better.”

Lucas rolls his eyes, thankful that the flashlight’s shut off, making it way too dark to catch the warmth on his cheeks. “Stop.”

Eliott grins. “I’ve been so obsessed with your eyes from the moment I saw them.”

“Obsessed?” Lucas repeats, laughing. “How romantic.”

“Would you turn down the attitude? I’m trying to make a speech here.” Eliott’s bouncing on his feet now— is he getting cold?

“Sorry, go on,” Lucas says, gesturing with a hand for Eliott to continue.

“I’m starting over.”

“Sure, whatever.”

“Jesus, I’ve always thought you were so fucking rude, you know.”

“You’re really nailing the romance up in here, dude.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Or what?” Lucas’ eyes are still stuck on the sky.

“Or I’ll marry you,” Eliott whispers and Lucas feels his brain combust.

What?

He hasn’t moved, still facing the stars, but his eyes are unseeing.

It isn’t like Eliott hasn’t talked about marriage before, but that was years ago, when they were children. And Lucas had doubted how serious he’d been about it.

Eliott’s graduated from college last year and he’s having the time of his life as an intern in the film industry. He’s got his own apartment where Lucas had moved in ages ago— it had been a chill, unofficial thing, really, Lucas had gone over once upon a time and just didn’t go back home.

Lucas is only nineteen, he’s still got quite a bit to go before figuring out where he wants to be after graduation.

He doesn’t know if getting married any time soon is a good idea at all.

“No,” he says, zoning back in, blinking up at the sky.

“… No?”

“No.” He turns, gazing up at Eliott’s falling expression. Despite the loss of spark in them, the skies above the two of them are no match against the galaxies in Eliott’s blue, blue eyes. “No, I won’t shut up.”

To hell with good ideas anyway.

The smile that blooms on Eliott’s face is worth the, probably, very fucking stupid decision Lucas has just made. Faced with the intensity of the joy radiating from his soulmate, Lucas can’t comprehend how he’s ever to decline the question.

Eliott drops down on one knee.

“Oh no,” Lucas says, shaking his head. “Get up, get up, don’t do this.”

But of course Eliott doesn’t listen. He soaks up Lucas’ panic and seems to gain confidence from it, the utter asshole. “Lucas Lallemant…”

Lucas takes the hood of his jacket and folds it over his eyes.

Eliott laughs, “Baby, it doesn’t have to be now, or the year after, or any time soon. I don’t care when it is. But I’ll really appreciate it if you say yes to marrying me at some point before we die.”

Lucas peeks down at him. “Is that your big speech?”

“No, I forgot my original speech when you said no earlier,” Eliott admits, pulling Lucas’ hands away from his face to make sure that he sees clearly what’s hidden inside Eliott’s palm.

Lucas watches Eliott’s fingers unfold and he knows there’s got to be some kind of ring in there but what he sees makes him gasp out a resounding, “No!” And he spins around, hands over his head. He can’t believe this. “No! You’re so cheesy, what the fuck?” He doesn’t know what to do with himself, it feels like his limbs are trying to shiver out of his body from the inside out.

Eliott isn’t even on his knees anymore, he’s just sitting on the snow powdered ground, laughing it up. “You don’t like it?” He barely gets the words out before dissolving into more high pitched laughter. Lucas doesn’t understand why he loves this idiot.

“How… it was so ugly,” he mumbles, stepping closer to look at the ring again. It’s not ugly anymore, to be honest. The metal is now slimmer, more delicate than crude, its polished surface glimmering every time it catches onto a source of light. The haphazard knot that connects the band together has been trimmed so that it looks more like intertwining branches rather than a badly screwed keychain.

“Can I?” Eliott stands, hands hovering close to Lucas’.

Lucas nods, fascinated as it slips perfectly over his finger.

It’s actually really stupidly beautiful.

“Fuck.”

“Are you crying?”

“Shut up.”

He’s five when mama tells him that Eliott is going to be a big part of his life.

So on the Monday after everything suddenly looked weird and bright, Lucas seeks Eliott out so he can watch him make more ugly paintings.

He’s letting Eliott talk him through what’s going on in his newest project when something falls out of Eliott’s sweater pocket. Lucas picks it up, frowning when a sharp end pokes at his finger.

“What’s this?” He lifts it up to Eliott’s face and the boy goes cross eyed a little.

“Oh!” Carefully, he takes it off Lucas’ hold and places it on the desk. “It’s your ring.”

Lucas doesn’t get it. “Why would I have a ring?”

“For when I get you to marry me,” Eliott declares, looking at it proudly. “Mama makes things with metals, she said I can have this!”

“It’s big.”

“Of course, silly. You have to grow up before you marry me.”

Lucas stares at the ring some more. The whole thing is crooked and he’s pretty sure the knots will stab someone’s eyes out if they’re not careful. It’s so ugly, he doesn’t like it. But Eliott seems very happy so Lucas keeps those thoughts to himself. “Is it… abstract?”

Eliott blinks, looking like he doesn’t know what to say. That’s okay, Lucas asks a lot of questions even adults don’t know the answer to.

“Huh,” Eliott says, putting a finger to his chin like he’s thinking hard about it.

The teacher interrupts them before Eliott can give him a proper answer, letting Eliott know that his parents are there to pick him up.

Lucas smiles when Eliott pouts— it’s really cute. It reminds him of when his neighbour’s little baby frowns. Super adorable.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Lulu,” Eliott sighs, getting up to pack up his backpack. “You can have this one too.” He gives Lucas the new ugly painting; it looks like the one Lucas already has but Eliott’s used different colours this time— all shades of blue.

“Bye bye.” Lucas waves him goodbye.

“Wait!” Eliott runs back to their table and drops a kiss on his forehead.

Lucas blinks up at him. “Why?”

“Because I love you but papa says I can’t kiss you again until you’re fifteen!” Eliott prattles out, already jogging back towards the door as he waves his hands about. “Bye, Lulu!”

Lucas leans against the table, chin resting against his folded arms as he smiles at the new painting Eliott’s made for him.

He’s beginning to like abstract.

#skam france #elu #fictag #this is a monster chapter #hope u enjoy #im gonna keep tagging #elu fluff week #haha #ok i gotta go #elu soulmate au

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