#This is probably the most updating I'll do for now since i am gonna be very busy this week

[spacehareart]

I have to create names for them all but, heres some fake screenshots from unofficial DSAF 4. Featuring your duo phone bosses and Prize Corner goof ball.

As well as The Glamrocks on stage.

I'm doing the minor work for now, as Vanny, and the players will mainly have to be drawn by me. But thats okay !!!

Rooms so far:

Main areas of the mall.

Diner area

Mini golf

Roller rink

Kart area

Restrooms

Your house

Vannys Basement

Daycare

Theatre

Arcade

The computer room / secret room

Tagging: @antiquecandlekitty :3

[sen-ya]

Life After Info Post

[Click here to access the Life After Digital Comic Book]

Summary: Two years ago, a viral outbreak rose the dead. Considering how his life had gone up to this point, surgeon Trafalgar Law figured this might as well happen too. When a supply run into the nearby city gets intercepted by a seemingly reckless and impulsive former patient, the dependable routine Law had settled into in this new life shatters. He finds himself exposed — his body out in the infected landscape, his conscious clawing to define what he believes is right, his heart begrudgingly deciding to find a new home on his sleeve. Maybe there’s more than a virus roaming the new world that can bring a dead man back to life.

Content Warnings: Canon typical violence, zombies/body horror (but lbr I am not good at making scary things look scary)

Relationships: Luffy x Law

Update Schedule: New page every Monday/Wednesday/Friday

Page Count: [37 posted | 55 drawn]

Latest Update: [7/21/24] WOWEE did I get myself carried away this morning. I just spent 5 hours organizing my comics and creating the digital comic book pages. I could have spent that time drawing or idk not doing what I do for my job, but I cannot be stopped. Anyway I blocked out 30 pages of this comic last week and they include the most intense action sequence I've ever done in my gotdang life. Wish me luck because I am nervous about tying down all my drawings lmao.

OLD UPDATES:

[6/29/24] HULLO! I'm doing so bad at keeping my masterposts updated lately I am sorry. All pages of life after are tagged life after if you're ever looking between masterpost updates! Also exciting update, I finally have figured out all the different plot points i'm gonna be hitting (yay!). I got hung up on something for awhile that made me not wanna work on this project, but I'm back at it. I think we'll end up with 6-7 parts! I have probably another 80-100 pages to draw lol. Also i got the app Magic Poser and it's AWESOME and I immediately used it to block out sets cuz MAN I hate backgrounds.

[6/10/24] HELLO. I'm sorry I've been shit at updating my masterposts lately. It's easiest to do from my computer, which I rarely use, and life has been happening. I also can't believe I bungled the queue and posted pg19 before pg18 i am very sorry 🤦 Eventually I'll have to turn this into an airtable base I'm sure, but until that day comes where I have like 100 pages of this comic we're stickin to the regular post lmao

[5/26/23] I got real caught up in doing summer of lawlu comics this week and this is the first week since the first week of April I haven't drawn new Life After pages and it feels weird 🙊

[5/19/24] More Luffy backstory comin' this week! :^)

[5/12/24] Updating now so get myself on schedule to update on Sundays like I had been with my other comic master post!

[5/8/24] Thank you to everyone who's liked/reblogged/comment on the first few pages!! It means the world to me that anyone's reading my silly little comics.

[4/28/24] HULLO. It’s happeninnng. I’ve spent the last few weeks working on this comic, and I gotta make this post so I can start queuing pages & link this in them! This is the most like….legit? Comic endeavor I’ve undertaken perhaps….ever. I’m very nervous about committing to how long it will need to be lol. This story is dear to my heart — zombie content is kind of my very favorite. I’ve always found it to be a great backdrop for exploring themes like grief, coping with change, community, and learning to live again. It’ll be a long haul but I hope you’ll ride it out with me!! Tomorrow I’ll be posting the first two pages. After that a page will post every Monday/Wednesday/Friday. As of this post I’ve completed over 20 pages so that I have a good lead on what’s posting and continuing to write, so I’m hopeful that’s a cadence I’ll be able to maintain. I’ll update this post weekly to include the most recent pages the way I do with my main comics master post. All pages will be tagged 'Life After' and I'll tag any pages with zombies in them with 'zombie' for blacklisting etc.

[nyerus]

Guide to Watch TGCF Donghua Season 2

With the new season of the Tian Guan Ci Fu/Heaven Official's Blessing donghua finally releasing soon, I wanted to make a post explaining the different ways fans can watch and support it! Things have changed since season 1, so my old guide is no longer relevant apart from the infographics on how to subscribe to Bilibili CN (and the YouTube channel)!

And to be upfront: the main sites that are going to be broadcasting the donghua have been very sparse with information. I fully expect that we will have to wait until after the first episode releases to know all the details, so while I am making this guide to help people right now, things might change! Please keep that in mind and stay patient! I will post any important updates in the replies as I can!

Additionally, because of copyright/licensing, different sites are going to work in different regions. I do not know with 100% certainty what is going to work in a particular country. There's gonna be some trial and error!

So the main options we have for season 2 are:

Crunchyroll

Sub price: $9.99 USD per month for basic (local prices may vary)

Regions: Americas, Europe, Africa, Middle East, Oceania.

Pros: Easy to subscribe to if available in your region.

Cons: Unlikely for true simulcast so it'll be a bit delayed.

Link to main site (season 2 listing not up yet)

For app: download via App Store/Google Play Store.

Bilibili. tv (EN site/app)

Sub price: $4.99 USD per month (local prices may vary)

Regions: Southeast Asia only.

Pros: Airs earlier than Crunchyroll. Interface is in English.

Cons: If you want to watch it outside of SEA, you'll need a VPN.

Link to Season 2 on website

For app: download via APK link on website if you are outside of SEA. Otherwise use App Store/Google Play Store.

Bilibili YouTube Channel

Sub price: $4.99/$5.99 USD per month (local prices may vary)

Regions: Many -- EXCEPT Japan, South Korea, the Americas, UK, Australia, New Zealand.

Pros: Easy to subscribe if available in your region.

Cons: If you want to watch it from the regions listed above, you'll need a VPN.

Link to channel

It's the youtube app....

Bilibili. com (CN site/app)

Sub price: $9.99 USD for 3 months

Regions: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Pros: If they're gonna air season 2, then they might be the source broadcast if the EN site isn't. Also probably cheapest for those abroad.

Cons: Chinese interface may be intimidating. Not 100% sure if it'll air as normal.

Link to Season 2 on website

For app: download via App Store/Google Play Store.

(NOTE: If you are in Japan, it will be available on WOWOW. If you are in South Korea, it will be available on Laftel.)

F.A.Q.s

🔹What is the release date/time? Bilibili EN has announced it as 20:00 GMT+8 on October 18th. If it releases on Bilibili CN, it'll probably be the same time. Crunchyroll has stated October 18th, but has not yet announced a time as of the posting this guide. I checked. Japan and South Korea have their own release times, so please consult the relevant broadcasters!

🔹Can I watch it on Netflix/Amazon Prime/etc? These streaming services will likely only have it after the whole season concludes, and with a significant delay. For reference, it took several months after finishing for season 1 to be released on Netflix.

🔹Which platform should I choose? Whichever one you can actually access, and feel most comfortable using!

🔹When should I subscribe? Personally, I'll be waiting until the last day before release, just to make sure I have the most information possible. However, I'm sure the idea of doing that makes many people nervous, so... yeah. Whenever is convenient for you!

🔹Which one will have the donghua the quickest/earliest? Probably Bilibili CN & Bilibili EN. I suspect they'll simulcast with each other. I cannot be 100% certain about anything though, because of limited info! For season 1, YouTube and Funimation (now Crunchyroll) were delayed, and it's hard to say if they'll be better this time or not.

🔹Do I need a VPN for Bilibili EN or their YT channel? If you are outside of SEA, yes.

🔹Do I need a VPN for Bilibili CN? Probably not, unless you are in a country that restricts access to CN sites and apps (like India).

🔹Which VPN should I use? This will be up to you! It's best to research what the different options are, and what will work for your needs!

🔹How will I know I'll be able to watch season 2 from my region? The most surefire way is to subscribe to a platform that has officially announced to be serving your region (e.g. Crunchyroll for the Americas). Unofficially, if you can watch the latest trailer and other promo videos on your chosen platform, then there's a good chance you're okay! The exception to this is the YouTube channel, which has some of the trailers public, but has all of season 1 unavailable if you aren't in the right region.... Additionally, be mindful, because even if you're able to see season 1, season 2 might still be region-locked on certain platforms. (E.g. you can watch all of season 1 via Bilibili EN if you're from the USA no problem. But you can't access season 2 without a VPN to a SEA server.)

🔹What languages are going to be available and will there be English subtitles? While dubs for multiple languages have been confirmed, I'm unsure if any of these will be available on release. It'll likely be offered only in Chinese first. For season 1, there were hardcoded CN & EN subtitles for Bilibili on release. Funimation re-subbed the episodes (EN) for their own release, and Crunchyroll will probably do the same.

🔹I watched it on Funimation last time, can I watch it through them this time? No, they were absorbed (in some capacity idk) by Crunchyroll. So they are not distributing season 2 of TGCF, only Crunchyroll is.

🔹Is season 2 actually available in China and thus on Bilibili CN? Yes and no! As long as you are not in mainland China, it seems you will have access to season 2 through Bilibili CN. All promo materials and trailers seem to be available to us, which is a good sign! (They are not available for mainlanders, but mainland fans are able to watch via HK/Macau versions apparently.)

🔹Hopeful that it will be available, I would like to watch it via Bilibili CN, so how do I sign up and subscribe? To make an account, consult this reddit post. To subscribe, please consult the guide below! It's a little old (made it for season 1) but still works pretty much the same.

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

02/12/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Parrot Analytics; Cast & Crew; Kristian Nairn; Nathan Foad; Erroll Shand; Trends and Stats; V-Day Video for Prime; In person events and Watch Party reminders; People of Earth; WooAsACrew; Kudoboard for Cast & Crew Update; Love Notes; Daily Darby; Tonight's Taika; Well folks, it was another busy busy day. I apologize, I'm a bit exhausted today so I'll be making this quicker than normal.

== Parrot Analytics ==

Some Q4 data was released by Parrot Analytics for HBO and Max and as you can probably imagine, this made most of the internet explode. Referencing @adoptourcrew here since they did a great bit of research.

SRC: HBO's Most Popular Shows - hidden behind Paywall

== UK How You Can Help==

Below are actions to do every day to capitalise on #OurFlagBBC! More info below on how to use YouGov. Tumblr

=Cast & Crew Sightings=

= Wee John Wondays ==

I think everyone's favorite part of the day was when Nathan Foad appeared on Wee John Wonday's. He is by far one of the best guests ever.

Please go watch the whole damn live, but if you don't have time right now. Here's a clip from our fabulous friend @edscuntyeyeshadow who recorded it for us, I have just left it on repeat so I can continue to laugh.

A few quotes/highlights in case you can't watch anything right now:

Highlights:

Kristian's Garage Fire

Nathan's Writing

Nathan was VERY sick at the beginning of filming S2, Sick AF and had to learn how to roll and smoke cigarettes.

Nathan was not aware he was on camera when the sandwich hit him in the face.

Gypsy made him a jacket to wear IRL that matched his gorgeous one in the show (Gypsy is the best)

Nathan's favorite scene was the one with Matt Maher with the Art on the Wall.

Kristian's favorite scene was the one with Con O'Neill and asking to put on make up

Quotes:

"NOT TO BE A BIG THING RIGHT NOW BUT I AM" - Nathan

"Sniffed the air like a fox in heat" - Kristian

"You little gay bitch" - Nathan

"Mid town special" - Nathan, as Kristian

"Im a horrible un wanted nipple twister" - Kristian

"Needy puffs" - Nathan

== Erroll Shand ==

As usual our dear friend Erroll is out here really pushing the SaveOFMD material/data.

== Trends and Stats ==

== Valentine's Day Video For Prime ==

It’s Monday, which means it’s time to send Prime Video all our love ! Let’s #WooAsACrew 🐙💜 Vocals: ferventrabbit on Twitter Video: Giulianaazr on Twitter

== Event and Watch Party Reminders! ==

= OFMD Matelotage Processional =

Tues Feb 13: 8-11 am at: Kismet Salon 4111 W Olive Ave. Burbank CA 91505

If you show up-- you get free stickers!

= People of Earth Watch Party =

People of Earth Season 1: Episodes 3 and 4 tomorrow! If you don't have access reachout to @iamadequate1!

10 PM GMT / 5 PM EST / 4 PM CST / 2 PM PST

#PiratesOfEarth

#SaveOFMD

#AdoptOurCrew

= WooAsACrew =

Tue 13: Send @netflix some love!

== Cast & Crew Kudoboard ==

Hey all, I already made a short post about it but the Kudoboard was overrun by some absolute twats today so I had to lock it down with a password. If you'd like to still submit something to the cast and crew that's still doable, you'll just need the pw. Please just DM me here or twitter, or Instagram, or wherever you can find me or the @saveofmdcrewmates folks also have it. We will be sending it off / locking it on Valentine's day early morning so please reach out prior!

== Love Notes ==

Hey lovelies, I am really low on spoons tonight so I'm gonna let some other folks send you love on my behalf. See you tomorrow, all the love. <3

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

Tonight's gifs are courtesy of:

Taika: @chrysalis-writes and Rhys: @thunderwingdoomslayer

Happy Murray Monday and Enjoy tomorrow's Taika Tuesday!

[coatl-cuddles]

PLEASE infodump to me, how do we know for a fact the skiddo in the trailers and concert is the prince? I am starved for Alef lore

💫 HAYYY~~~~ 💫

I will GLADLY info dump about my favorite sky kids!!

SPOILER WARNING FOR ANYONE WHO HASNT COMPLETED AURORA!

Obligatory nothing is absolutely confirmed in sky unless stated by creators since there's no dialogue. So lots of stuff is always up to interpretation.

Howeverrrr the likelihood of Alef being the sky kid we see is essentially 99.9%!!

So here we go!!!

First thing to note is that the spirit from isle and the concert is totally the same Sky Kid. And we can tell thanks to MAMA Spirit! Or well- the adoptive mama spirit! More specifically... the adoptive mama spirit who unfortunately dies :(

One of the FIRST spirits in the game is a feminine looking ancestor with a relatively high pony tail, who discovers a fallen sky child (likely to be Alef)! This occurs in the Isle of Dawn!

Then, in the concert, we get a similar looking spirit ( high ponytail ) who ALSO took in a sky child-- who dies tragically :( leaving the sky child orphaned and alone.

Granted it is a different body type!!! But considering the amount of retcons and redesigns of areas / updates to the game around this time I'll look past it for now. But regardless, ponytail stays the same.

And of course lastly is our mama from the trailers with our Dawn Ember :(

Who is also wearing a bag on her shoulders like the aurora spirit (you can see the rope strap!)- and who also tragically loses her life as confirmed by TGC during the anniversary livestream. This can be found when they state it's the tale of two ORPHANS... implying our Dawn Ember does not have a guardian. Or at least not anymore. (Which also implies our Dusk Ember/The Stewards parents who gave him the butterfly pendant ALSO die, but that's for another time)

Something to note is that Sky Kids and ancestors are NOT the same race. They are completely different. Ancestors do have children!! But Sky Kids are a separate thing.

And they're rare.

Very rare.

So rare in fact that it's heavily believed by the fandom that Alef/Resh was the FIRST sky kid.

So the likelihood of two different pony tailed ancestors (who live in the Isle of Dawn AND who die tragically) adopting a sky kid is SUPER UNLIKELY!

So that's how we vaguely know it's the SAME Sky kid. BUT!! Most importantly, we know the Sky Kid is Alef forrrrr kinda shallow reasons, but they hold water!!! So it counts!!!

Which is basically to sayyyy... Dawn Ember is wearing a baby version of King Resh's mask.

So like- not the most GROUND BREAKING lore reveal. But---

Like-

Yeah,

That's our favorite star prince right there!

Also the implication that he got the extra four points AFTER prophecy, explains why as a kid he only has the main 4 points at the top and sides. Plus he already has suspiciously placed "cracks" in his mask where the 4 other points will come out of. That's our baby boy for sure!!!

Obviously, this isn't concrete proof of tgc just going HEY that's Alef!

However, for a game with zero dialogue and the most complex game of charades ever, this is basically as good as it's gonna get when it comes to tying everything together!

Also his name is Dawn.

Dawn Ember. For isle of Dawn. Which took me until 5 minutes ago to realize.

Which explains a lot, because we've all been kinda side eyeing the names like why tf did they name Hopeful Steward the Dusk Ember. But, if they're naming them off of AREAS and not literally the day/night motif that makes sense. Especially since a ton of Dusk Embers trailer scenes seem to take place in Wasteland, which the devs call the Dusk area. Despite him probably being from prairie or aviary village.

So badabing badaboom that's our baby boy right there!!! 3 different ways. 3 different flavors!!! All for the sake of mama spirit dying. Tragic. But that's our boy alrighttttt yayyy!!!!!!!!

Watch me be totally 100% wrong and all the fanart make zero sense a couple months from now. BUT IM DYING ON THIS HILL (for now!)

🎉🎉 That's our Prince right there!! 🎉🎉

[indigo-creates-chaos]

So I drew stuff-

I was bored at a meeting type thing two days ago so I did a lil bit of rough sketching.

These are the results! I like Rae and Momboo the most. I don't know what went wrong with Icarus though lol, we'll just ignore them-

I also just did some rought coloring bc I wanted to, here's how that looks.

I don't know whether I prefer the uncoloured or the coloured versions but I am glad I did the sketches in the first place.

This is my first time drawing any sort of specific fanart for a fandom and I am a little sad that it took me until days before the finale airs to draw anything related to fable smp, but it is what it is.

I kinda want to do a bigger, digital lineup with more characters but knowing me that's gonna take a long time (if it gets done at all). I'm posting about it here so I have more incentive to actually do it. I did want to get that finished by the time I watch the finale (not when it airs bc that's not possible), but I don't think that's going to happen, no matter how much I want it to. But I guess we shall see! For now, thank you for reading and have a lovely [timezone]!

This section is optional and mostly just an update.

About the finale. I will not be seeing it live and I will not see it when its posted since a) i'll have a guest over for a few days and b) its airing at 1am my time. Its probably gonna take another week or two for me until I can watch it because I am behind. I do know about Sherbs summary vod but now I might as well catch up by watching the other vods... all this to say that if you see me posting about old vods after the finale is aired, don't worry about it lol, just let me vibe in blissful ignorance. You'll know once I've seen the finale, trust me. I'm also going to continue being pretty inactive in terms of reading other posts on here since I don't want to spoil myself. Once I'm all caught up I might just spend some time reblogging a bunch of posts and talking about the acting and all that good stuff. But anyway! Thank you for reading the additional stuff lol and have a nice [timezone]!

[emotionalcadaver]

Life update and general ramblings under the cut. Honestly I have no expectation of anyone to actually read all of this, I just gotta get it out somewhere.

So. I'm gonna try to continue to keep things as normal on here as I can, but if I disappear, or if I'm not responding to things as consistently or as quickly, this is why:

I'm dealing with a little bit of a health scare right now. And before anyone freaks out (like I am) it's probably nothing major to be concerned about. But for those of you who don't know, I have major health anxiety and am a bit of a hypochondriac, so I've been more or less teetering on the edge of a complete breakdown since I found out about this. It's been hard to find the motivation or focus to do much of anything, and some of the other mental issues I've been dealing with like my OCD have been majorly triggered by the stress this whole thing has caused and are running rampant.

It's been really discouraging, not only because I'm dealing with the fear that I may be seriously ill, but also because all the progress I thought that I'd made in overcoming some of my psychological issues like my OCD feels like they've gone out the fucking window.

I have another test on Friday that will determine if something actually is truly wrong or not, and I likely won't get the results until the week after. So I'm more or less in my equivalent of purgatory until then.

I'm going to try to get some comments queued up this weekend, so I can at least say that I did something productive, and so I'm not completely absent on here in case I do need to vanish for a little while. If there's anything particular you want me to see or respond to, please tag me in it and give me a little nudge if I don't respond fast enough. I promise I'm not ignoring anyone on purpose.

And don't worry about this affecting Love Me Where I'm Most Ruined. I'll still be updating on my weekly schedule. And even if things do go as badly as my brain is convinced they will and I am in fact dying, I'm gonna do my best to try to finish the series.

Anyway, I don't mean to freak anyone out or anything. Like I said, I think that this is just mostly my health anxiety having a fucking field day with the rest of my brain. But I just wanted to explain why I may be or have been a little off.

[onlyancunin]

Hey guys,

a little update on my situation with my ex if anyone's interested. Gonna be a doozy, but there's just so much in my head right now and I know there might be some worrying about me.

Or maybe I'll just spark a bit of confidence in someone else ✨

You know how you get a pizza, all excited, try it, and it's not good? Like it was fine at first and hey, you were hungry, but with each bite it progressively got worse. Do you stopped after a piece or two or three. And just tossed out the rest.

But it was enough to give you a severe food poisoning. So you spend a good portion of the next however many days throwing up and not being able to meet with friends and family because you're too sick. And you're so frustrated, because the pizza wasn't even that good, and you didn't eat that much, but you're still unable to function??

So yeah, I got severe emotional poisoning from relationship with my ex. But after we broke up I got nowhere to go, and he agreed to continue living together, so that I can move out once I secure money for deposit and whatnot.

Never go for that.

Last Sunday ex threw another jealous fit at me, making me unable to work for another 2 days - and then he was off to holiday with his friends (which couldn't come quick enough, I literally counted hours for him to leave). That left me and severely poisoned, but also gave me opportunity to collect myself and regroup a little away from him.

3 days later I had a new place and just today I got the keys.

Coincidentally my post about him about two months ago sparked a friendship with someone from here (Tumblr is a country okay). She kept me together through all that and let me tell you this was fucking tantalizing. It's surreal how things can change in such a short time. Having her as a friend truly opened my eyes as to what a relationship is NOT, seeing how someone who was just a stranger a few months ago, today cared for me more than he ever did.

I gave myself up for scraps of attention and believed when everyone around was telling me he is "one of the good guys". He came from nice, big family, with stable finances, nice group of friends. A noble job, a paramedic, which always impressed my sorry graphic design/IT developer ass. Like the only thing I'm saving is oceans from existing with the amount of shit that's being produced partly by my designs. So it felt good to be supportive of the good person and finally have a family, since I do not have one of my own.

Which is probably why I took the break-up so badly, even if I initiated it. I felt incredibly guilty for letting everyone around down. Everyone loved him. And I mean everyone. The only thing I ever aired I discussed with people outside of our common friends, and those were the people who told me something doesn't add up. And as I started following my gut feeling (and had a speedrun to breakup by hurting my knee and needing help where my ex completely dropped the ball), he started acting up. Suddenly setting boundaries with his family was me being jealous over him even having one, I just couldn't understand apparently how I'll never be the most important to him. Me asking him to be here for me when I'm having a hard time was met with "You're having a hard time EVERY DAY!".

Essentially I just ruined his family visits, his vacation with my knee injury, his days with my bad moods etc. But he ruined one too many Sundays for me.

So here I am, packing my sh#t and planning what goes where because I know I will be thoroughly exhausted after all things are moved, so I need to plan ahead.

And I still throw up emotionally, sobbing every 10 minutes, I don't even know why anymore. I just cry until I stop and then I continue prepping for move.

It's just a bad pizza.

[darkestrellar]

Hello everyone! As you can see (or may already have seen), I changed Svern's url, after at least a year of thinking about doing so.

I've endeavoured to go through and update all links on the blog and information posts, but there's always a chance something slipped through the cracks. If you encounter a broken link, let me know.

Over the past three or so weeks, I have also:

Updated the on-blog muse page (updated page/section formatting, revised and rewrote information, added new stuff, added a trivia and misc section at the bottom of the page);

Updated the on-blog verses page (updated formatting, revised and rewrote verse descriptions, fleshed out some a little better);

Done a Major and quite overdue update to the Carrd. I updated the url to match the new one on the blog; overhauled the rules page to bring it in line with the most recent version on the blog, then did the same with the muse and verses sections, and I updated their formatting/layout, which I had been dissatisfied with for a while. As I threatened hinted earlier, there are a lot more words than there used to be, but it also looks much nicer (imo).

There are still a lot of other things I want to/am considering doing:

New blog avatar because this one is STILL old and outdated

Possibly make a new icon border! If I do do this, it will be a pain, because my icon bases are horribly organised or need remaking due to how I've gone about editing/making them in the past.

Update the many and various other information posts on the blog to do with verses and meta.

Revise Pokémon roster page (idk how much will need changing).

Finally, an update on my life goings-on:

I'm doing better now, although I'm not quite back to my usual self. This month was the first decent month where I didn't have any major anxiety episodes since March-April. I still have not gotten to have counselling like I was supposed to because (gestures in an annoyed manner) the waitlist is taking forever and I regret not taking the doctor's offer months ago to get a different referral but oh well.

I still haven't recovered all my mental stamina and my imagination isn't working as well as I would like either, but it's mending, slowly.

My IRL life is probably going to get busier, but now that I'm no longer so prone to feeling like I'm gonna go crazy or spontaneously die for unknown reasons, I can cope with that and juggle it better too. I'll probably still focus on maintenance (across all of my blogs) over writing for now because of the fact that my creative inspiration is still kinda like fog, but at least I'm not completely on hiatus anymore.

I'll be working on things in the background.

[justalilpearlie]

!! Intro !! (updated)

Hello everyone, my name is PearlescentMoon

Hihi! I'm Pearl! Magic is quite a fine name aswell. Although I'm a man of many names ;)

I am a minor, my gender labels are gendervoid verinix, tho I also ID as bigender and ftm (fem presenting tho! not transmasc, just trans man)! I'm queer, leaning on mlm, tho I also like girls here and there.

I go by He/Xe. I can She/Her myself + close friends/mutuals are allowed, but refrain from doing so without explicit permision please. (I also use neos: Void/Moon/Sweet/It/Fluff/Love/Fizz/Paw)

I'm from Argentina, born and raised, never moved. Speak fluent english and spanish.

I'm autistic and I have ADHD aswell as BPD and a few other things I wont list right now! But yeah I'm psychotic (ooo scary word.. lmao)

- -🌄-📀-🌙- -💚- -💛- -✨-🌄-✨- -💛- -💚- -🌙-📀-🌄- -

I'm an IRL of many, mainly c!Pearl (mcyt), c!Magic(outsmp+psmp), Samuel Emily (fnaf [games canon]) and Shin Tsukimi (yttd). If you don't like it you can leave, block me, or whatever, cause you aint gonna change my life or how I am. I'm in therapy, which unlike random hate and harrassment online, does help me :)

I like to stream, roleplay, draw, sometimes make playlists or moodboards.. And my biggest interests right now are the Outsiders SMP, The Hatchetfield Musicals, Life Series and Empires 1.

I use kin tags for reach cause I'd love interaction from any mediamates!! Specially from Outsiders <3

Fictionkins, therians and traumagenic systems all welcome!

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DNI prefferably:

- Basic DNI criteria (proshippers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, TERFs, ableist, etc)

- Endos/non-traumagenic "systems" DNI. block me if u want, i wont argue abt it in the comments/reblogs. or interact if u want but im not gonna follow u back or anythin shrugs.

- reality checkers or anti-IRLs DNI. I aint "romanticizing" shit, I'm existing and living my life, if thats a problem to you too bad cause my psychologist aproves of what I'm doing, since I aint harming anyone and I myself am doing dandy.

- anti-kin also DNI cause most of my friends are fictionkins and if you talk shit abt my fellas idk i wouldnt like having u around much

CCs I'd rather if you didn't interact, but if you shall do so anyways, do so at your own risk, you've been warned. /lh

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"Disclaimer"

- I talk about MajorMoon (Scott x Pearl) a LOT, if u didnt notice by the acc theme. These are my romantic memories, its a gay ship, not woman/gay man, so if it makes u uncomfortable or u hate it or whatever then ur probably not gonna like my content lmao. COUGH, consider joining us if you do like what you see... /nf We're a small comunity of supporters.. just me.. and a few of my peeps... that was a joke, sir. /ref

- This isn't roleplay, its my main acc where im ""unapologetically"" myself, but if u do wanna rp outsiders/life series/empires/fnaf u can always shoot me a dm and maybe I'll give u my discord.

- I talk about myself (c!Pearl) using 3rd person in many posts tagged with main fandom tags. This is to cause less confusion to casual fans slash ""normies"" (lhj) that well.. don't know what IRLs are! Also that way I feel safer and don't have to worry as much abt getting harassed and such for my identity.

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Special People Mentions!! fps = * (1 or more.. wouldnt say in a priority sorta order but. more or less yea)

Family! <3 🌼 @pehpurr* SISTER!! YOU'RE AMAZING, DAISY. SO SO GREAT. YOUR ART IS INCREDIBLE, YOU ARE SO PASSIONATE ABOUT EVERYTHING YOU DO, YOU ARE SO VERY CARING FOR OTHERS, SO KIND AND TALENTED, A GREAT WRITER AND THE BEST BEST SISTER I COULD EVER ASK FOR!! Scar, you changed my life, you were there for me when I needed you the most, I know you ALWAYS have my back. You're kind to me even when the world isn't, and know that even if we fight or if you do things I disagree with (ehem forgiving too much ppl /lht), I will never leave you, and I will never stop coming after you. I love you, Kanna. You're the best Peeps, keep it up, for you're a beacon of hope in everyone's lives. I'm so proud. ♡ ⚙️ @gentlexmadman DAD!! I FREAKING LOVE YOU DAD OMG!! I am SO very happy we got to spend our first fathers day together even if just a little, you made this the first year I was actually happy to celebrate it, looking forward to it and making a gift of my own :) Im so so happy to have you in my life. You are, likewise to Pepper, an AMAZING artist, so much detail, just so awesome in general. I love hearing all your silly stories about work and the people you know, old man. Thank you for being with me, papá, I never thought I'd actually find you again. Thank you so so very much. ♡

🐸 @bigb-enthusiast SIBLING!! MY SIBLING IN ZAYA OH MY GOODNESS IS THAT USER BIGB ENTHUSIAST?? YES IT SURE IS!! Bro I could listen to ur analysis and rambles til the end of the world u got the best ideas ever wtf!!?? Ur very freakin insane but also ur my best buddy, my nosey neighbor for life!! I appreciate u a lot, Bee, my favorite insane asylum escapee ♡

🔪 @skywardspecter OECAAAAA HEY ZACH ILYSM BROTHER!! YOUR ROLEPLAY AND WRITINGS ARE AAAAA-MAZE-ING !! I RLLY WANNA MEET U IRL!! UR SO GOOD AT ROLEPLAY AND ART, YOU'RE SO CREATIVE AND BRIGHT UR LIKE A BALL OF SUNSHINE!! U PUT UP W A LOT RUNNING SM SERVERS BUT U ALWAYS GET BACK UP AND I THINK THATS ADMIRABLE!! AND IDK VIANS TUMBLR BUT SHOT OUT TO VIAN AND ORCA TOO !! VIANS SUCH A GREAT SUPPORTIVE FRIEND FR NO MATTER WHAT AND ORCA IS SUCH A KIND AND FUNNY GUY, VERY UNDERSTANDING <33 I LOVE U GUYS!! U MAKE ME FEEL SAFE, LIVE LAUGH LOVE MAGIC MAZE ♡

🥣 @rennyus SOUP OMGGG HAI SIBLIIIING ILYSM !!! GGHHH YOU. YOU ARE SO GREAT AND PATIENT WITH ME, YOU'RE ALWAYS THERE FOR ME WHEN I NEED YOU AND YOU'VE NEVER EVER JUDGED ME FOR ANYTHING!! I LOOOOVE HEARING ABT UR MEMORIES THEYRE ALWAYS SO SO SWEET <33 I RLLY HOPE U FIND UR WIVES SOMEDAY CAUSE ALL I WANT IS TO SEE U HAPPY SIB ♡

🐟 Aussi, MY AMAZING COUSIN OMG?? IDK UR USER HERE BUT!! WE'VE BEEN THRU SOOO SO MUCH TOGETHER, EVEN WITH THE PERIODS WE DONT TALK MUCH IN, I LOOOOVE GETTING INTO THINGS U LIKE OR WHEN U TAKE THE TIME TO GET INTO THE STUFF I ENJOY TOO!!! UR FRIENDS ARE ALSO VERY SILLY N I LOVE PLAYIN PHASMO WITH YALL! I LOOOVE ALL THE MEMORIES WE SHARE TOGETHER AND THESE TWO YEARS OF COUSINSHIP HAVE BEEN AMAZING!! TO MANY MANY MORE YEARS COUSIN!! LOVE YOU TONS ♡

Simply special <3 ☕ @insomniac-coffeehouse** You're all simply so very special to me. I love every second we spend together. I love seeing yall thrive. I love your insane yet endearing behavior. You might be a bit unhinged sometimes, and admittedly not the healthiest person when it comes to your schedules, but I'm just so proud of everything you create and accomplish. I hope you get to accomplish all your dreams, and I hope I can be here to see that happen, if you let me :)! For many years more, cause I'm just oh so glad I met you. You spark joy in my brain and my heart <3 From the bottom of my heart, I'm in love with the hope you bring to this world. 🍊 Jack***, Oh my dearest, where do I even begin with you, sport... you trully are my soulmate, my other half... mi media naranja, if you will, heh.. Every second I get to spend with you is like heaven, no matter whats going on, I know everything will be alright cause I have you. You mean absolutely everything to me, my Hero, I know you'll always be there for me. You are the sweetest man I've ever met, and I'm so proud of the person you've become. If I had to choose between you or the world I'd choose you 10 times over, and I can say surely, that you'd do the same. I love every single detail about you, thank you for being so patient with me, you're wonderful, cielo. I love your voice, I love your eyes, I love your smile, your laughter. I love your use of words, the way you speak, your humor, your seriousness and stupidness. You stiff fuck, you were made for me and I was made for you, and I wouldn't have it any other way. You're my everything, mi vida, mi luz, mi estrella. Mi amor, mi mundo. ♡

Friends! 🏜️ @thecranewivesrpf My right hand man!! OMG we havent talked in a WHILE but ILYSM !!! MY SECOND IN COMMAND IN THE MAJORMOON SERVER FRFR!! WE SHOULD TALK AGAIN, I MISS U POOKIE </3

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Badges I've earned:

(More TBA)

That's it for now folks, love yall and see you around!

[study-coffee-chicago]

Halstead Headcanons Pt. 5

A/N: I wanted to write a Halstead Thanksgiving imagine and I also had a headcanon where Halstead sister chokes sitting in my drafts. Since they're both pretty short, I decided to combine them into another installment of Halstead Headcanons.

Enjoy!

Thanksgiving:

You anxiously looked at the forecast for the third time this hour. But, at this point, you knew it was no use. It was currently Monday morning and a snowstorm had hit Chicago late last night. Seeing as your 9 am Monday class was the only class that hadn't been canceled this week, you planned to leave right after class and make the eight-hour drive from Kansas City to Chicago, and planned to get back home around 9 pm at night. You, Will, and Jay had been discussing this possibility of you not coming home since last Thursday when the storm had been forecasted.

You sighed and looked at all you stuff that you had lined up in the hallway of your apartment, right beside your door. You figured maybe they'd be wrong, so maybe you'd be able to leave today...it wouldn't be the first time meteorologists had been wrong.

You dialed Will's number and put your phone on speaker as you started to make your coffee.

"Hey, kiddo," he answered.

"I can't come home. It's supposed to keep snowing and there's accidents everywhere when I get about two hours from home and--"

"Hey, hey, it's okay," Will said.

"But it's not! I wanna come home for Thanksgiving, Will!"

"And you will. Thanksgiving's on Thursday. It's only Monday. You can always make the drive on Wednesday if it clears up."

"But what if it doesn't!"

"Hey, don't think like that. The plows will be out soon and then we'll go from there, okay?"

You sniffled. "Okay."

"Now, get ready for class and me and Jay will keep you updated on the road conditions. Sound good?"

"I guess," you answered.

"If there's one thing I know about Chicago weather is that it's unpredictable, so think positive."

"Yeah. I'm gonna go now. I'll text Jay and tell him I won't be coming home today. He's probably gonna call me in the next thirty minutes, too."

"Good idea. Have a good day, kiddo. And, there's still three days until Thanksgiving, so don't stress."

"Easier said than done."

***

Wednesday, 7 am

Jay stood in the kitchen, pouring himself a cup of coffee. Then, he looked outside. It wasn't snowing as hard, but after one quick look at the traffic and road conditions online, he knew most of the roads were still glare ice. There was no way you could make the drive back.

"Morning," Hailey said. She grabbed a mug from the cupboard. "Roads not looking any better?"

"No. I don't know what to do, Hailey. I don't want her to miss Thanksgiving, but it's not safe for her to drive. I mean, we could try to go there later in the day, but with traffic and everything..."

"We wouldn't get there until the middle of the night," Hailey finished.

Then his phone buzzed. It was a text from Will. There was also a picture attached.

Train tickets? the text read with a picture of train tickets that left at 9:30 am and got into Kansas City around 5 pm.

"Don't tell my brother I said this," Jay began, "but he's a genius." Hailey furrowed her eyebrows and Jay passed her his phone. "The Amtrac is still running."

Hailey smiled. "Nine-thirty, huh? Guess we better start packing."

***

You curled up on your bed. Even though it was only 6 pm, it was dark. And, hey, maybe you'd sleep for over 24 hours and could sleep through Thanksgiving. You and Jay had talked this morning and he told you it still wasn't safe for you to drive home. He said that if he could drive out, he would. But, even he knew it was unsafe to drive long distances in this weather.

You were just about to turn your phone on silent and put it in sleep mode when a call came through. It was from Jay.

"Yeah?" you asked while you held back tears.

"Come to your window. We're outside."

"What? Jay, I think I heard you wrong."

"Just, come look out your window," he repeated.

"You're scaring me. I'm not gonna go look outside without knowing what I'm gonna see. It's dark outside! Is there a serial killer near me? Is that why you want me to look outside? I didn't get an emergency alert or anything!"

"Y/N, nothing's wrong. But, the Amtrac was still running and we rented a car when we got down here and--"

"You're here?!" you exclaimed and jumped out of bed and ran to your window.

You quickly peeked through the blinds and sure enough, there were Jay, Will, and Hailey standing in front of a small, blue rental car, the headlights illuminating them.

Your face lit up. "I'm coming down!"

Then, you hung up your phone and quickly threw on a hoodie over your t-shirt and slipped your feet into your shoes, not caring if the sweatpants you were wearing had a little stain on them.

You ran from the walking gate to the parking lot. "How did you guys...Scratch that! When did you guys think this up?"

Jay pulled you into a hug. "Ugh, missed you, kid. Morning's aren't the same without you trying to steal my coffee."

"You loved it," you joked.

"And, to answer your question," Will started and you gave him a hug, "It was my idea."

"Jay even went so far as to call him a genius," Hailey supplied.

"I told you not to tell him that," Jay muttered.

"Oops, must've been all the drinks I had on the train."

"You didn't even—" Jay cut himself off with a sigh. "Forget it. Happy wife, happy life."

"Glad I wasn't on that train," you muttered.

"Wasn't too bad," Will said. "If you had headphones."

"You're an ass," Jay said.

"Well, this ass was the one who had the idea to get Amtrac tickets."

"So, you're a smart ass then?"

"C'mon you guys," you said, trying your best to stop their bickering. "Grab your stuff. Let's get inside and then we can order from the pub across the street."

"Sounds good to me," Will said. "I gotta try that fried chicken sandwich you're always talking about."

***

"Holy shit," Will said after he took his first bite of the fried chicken sandwich. "You weren't kidding."

"I think this is one of the best things I've ever tasted," Jay agreed.

Then, Hailey quickly reached over and stole the other half of her husband's sandwich.

"Hey!"

"I wanna try it!" Then she took a bite. "You guys are right, this is really good!"

Then, she gave Jay his sandwich back and dipped her five cheese grilled cheese that she'd gotten in her bowl of tomato soup.

"So, what are we doing for Thanksgiving tomorrow?" you asked.

"Shit. I didn't that far ahead," Will said.

"Can't get a turkey now, wouldn't thaw in time," Hailey said. "They'd probably be sold out anyway."

You stood up and started looking through your fridge. "Let's see...I have eggs, bread, milk, a bunch of condiments, wraps..." you continued listing off what you had in your fridge, freezer, and cupboard. "I probably have the stuff for sweet potato casserole, mashed potatoes, broccoli, and we can do sandwiches instead of turkey. Oh! I can also make these apple butter cinnamon rolls I've made a couple times when I have friends over."

"We can probably find rolls somewhere in the morning," Jay supplied. "And maybe some carrots somewhere for cooked carrots."

"I can make spanikopita if I can find the ingredients tomorrow," Hailey said.

"And I'll find the wine aisle tomorrow," Will said.

"Or Trulys. We can always have those," you suggested. "The tropical pack, though."

Will rolled his eyes. "Of course you'd suggest that."

"So, me and Will will go to the store tomorrow morning and you can make the cinnamon rolls. Hails, what do you need for the spanikopita?"

Hailey then told Jay what she needed and he wrote it down on his phone. Then, the four of you continued eating and thinking about everything you needed to do tomorrow.

***

"Morning, sleepy head," Hailey greeted when you woke up the next morning. She was standing at the stove making eggs, a cup of coffee sitting on the counter next to her. "Want some eggs?"

"Oh, you don't have to make me any. I can cook for myself," you answered.

"I know you can cook for yourself. But, I'm already cooking, so if you want some, I can make you some."

"Okay," you answered. "Thank you."

"No problem."

You went back to your room and grabbed the current book that you were reading.

"Here you go," Hailey said a few minutes later and handed you a plate of eggs and toast along with a cup of coffee.

"Thanks, Hails."

"You're welcome. Hey, you mind if I steal a book from you to read?"

You shook your head. "Go right ahead," you answered. "I'd highly recommend The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue."

"Alright, I'll read that one then."

Then, the two of you ate your breakfast and read your books and you had a quiet morning with your sister-in-law before you started cooking.

***

Six hours later, the grilled sandwiches were made and all the sides and the cinnamon rolls and wine were on the counter. There was a Blackhawks game on your tv since none of you watched the game that they played yesterday. And, even though it wasn't the Thanksgiving you had in mind, your brothers and Hailey still made it one to remember.

END

Choking:

Request from anon on tumblr: Hey can you pls do a story of like the Halstead siblings with y/n Halstead (their sister) and they are at dinner and she starts choking and they like save her and she passes out and worries them

A/N: The age in this one is first grade.

For Jay and Will, grades had always been something important...well, Will a bit more so than Jay. But, they were important nonetheless and they had instilled that in you. Because of this, you were super excited to show Jay your report card after school because you had gotten all As (the A in math could definitely be attributed to your brothers going over subtraction flashcards with you almost every day). So, Will sent a quick text telling him to meet the two of you at Applebees because that's where you wanted to go for dinner. And, if you got all As (or all As and Bs, but you didn't know about the B part, which was between Jay and Will), you got to go wherever you wanted that night for dinner. Tonight, you chose Applebees.

"Will!" you exclaimed when you saw him while waiting for your table. "I got all A's!"

"I heard!" Will said, matching your enthusiasm. "You might be smarter than me!"

You quickly shook your head. "Nuh-uh."

"And what makes you say that, missy?"

"Because you a doctor!"

"Well...you're definitely smarter than Jay."

"Hey!" Jay yelled, faking offense.

"You did mess up that subtraction problem that day," Will reminded him.

"I had been up for over 24 hours!"

They quickly stopped their petty bickering when Jay's name was called for their table.

***

Half an hour later, you were eating your chicken tenders and fries while your brothers ate their food.

You swallowed a big bite and felt it get stuck a bit, so you took a sip of water. It still wouldn't go down and you still had the water in your mouth!

You started to cough and the water spewed out of your mouth.

Jay saw your red face and quickly started hitting your back, trying to get the food to come out.

"Keep coughing, Y/N," Will told you as he stood up and got right next to you.

You did three big coughs and still nothing.

Will crouched down next to you. "Y/N, I'm gonna get this out."

Your head was starting to feel weird, so whatever Will said, you didn't hear him. But, the next thing you knew, you felt hands wrap around your belly and then you felt yourself go forward and then back quickly and then then the big piece of chicken tender came flying out of your mouth and hit the spot in the booth where Will had previously been sitting.

You gasped for air.

"You okay, kiddo?" Jay asked and ran a hand through your hair.

You shook your head and buried your face in his chest.

"I'll go get the bill and order a milkshake for her to go," Will said and stood up.

Jay nodded and just continued to hold you.

"No more chicken and fries!" you told him.

"It's okay," he said. "You don't have to finish them. Will's gonna get you your milkshake and pay and then we're gonna go home. Does that sound okay?"

You nodded.

No more chicken tenders for you!

***

The next day when you came home from school, Jay inspected your lunch box and saw that all you had eaten out of it, was your juice box. It had taken a bit of coaxing last night to get you to drink your milkshake, but they finally got you to drink it by explaining that you didn't have to chew.

He walked into your room to see you grabbing some stuffed animals, presumably bringing them out into the living room to play with.

"Are you feeling okay, kiddo?" Jay asked and crouched down to your height and handed you your stuffed cat.

"Uh huh," you told him, even though your head felt funny.

"You sure? You didn't eat your lunch today."

He put a hand to your forehead. You didn't feel warm.

"Wasn't hungry," you answered.

At that, your stomach growled.

"Well, you're hungry now. How about you come eat your sandwich or Goldfish, alright? Your animals can come with you, too."

At this, you started to cry. You were scared, you felt funny, and you were hungry.

"No!" you wailed. "Just juice! I want juice!"

"Why just juice, Y/N? Why don't you want Goldfish? You love Goldfish."

"Don't want Goldfishies cause they get stuck. Like the chicken nugget!"

"No. They won't," Jay reassured you.

"How you know?"

Jay thought for a second. How could he make a first-grader understand this.

Then, a lightbulb went off in his head.

"C'mere. I gotta show you something," Jay told you.

You followed him out of your room—arms full of stuffed animals—and into the kitchen. He grabbed an empty cardboard toilet paper roll from the recycling bin and set that on the counter. Then, he grabbed a piece of bread from the fridge.

He held up the empty toilet paper roll. "This is like your mouth, okay?" You nodded. He crumpled up the piece of bread. "And pretend this is the chicken nugget you ate last night."

"But that's not a chicken nuggy! That's bread!"

Jay smiled. "I know that. But just pretend. Just like when you pretend you're a princess."

"Okay!"

"When you put a big piece of food in your mouth, like this–" Jay tried his best to shove the piece of bread into the empty roll. "--it gets stuck," he finished. "Then, someone has to help you get it out." With a little effort, Jay managed to squeeze the piece of bread out. "Like this. That's what happened to you last night and then Will had to help you get it out."

"Uh-huh," you agreed.

Jay then proceeded to rip the bread into little pieces. "But, when the food is smaller, it doesn't get stuck. See?" He fed a few pieces of bread through the empty roll and then let them fall out the other side and onto the table. "Then they go into your tummy. You just need to make sure the food is small and chewed up."

"I just gotta bite my chicken nuggies and then they don't get stuck anymore?" you asked with a curious look on your face.

"And chew them good," Jay confirmed.

"Can I have chicken nuggies now? And Goldfishes?"

Jay laughed. In a normal scenario, he wouldn't let you have both chicken nuggets and Goldfish; he'd make you eat your sandwich that was leftover from your lunch. But, seeing as you've barely eaten today, he figured one time wouldn't kill you.

"I think we have some Dino nuggies somewhere."

You gasped excitedly. "You got me the Dino ones?"

"I did. Now, how about you and your animals go sit down and I'll bring them to you, okay?"

You did as Jay suggested and went and sat down, putting your stuffed animals on the other chairs at the table.

And, when Jay told Will about everything and how he convinced you to eat with that demonstration, Will told him that he could be a science teacher. Of course, Jay had laughed and told him no way. You were more than enough. He didn't think he could deal with twenty of you.

END

A/N: Thanks for reading! Don't forget to reblog and comment!

taglist: @theambracer88 @virtualreader @kelelas-life @celyndavies @brookerz122493 @musicismyescape27 @anotherfan07 @thexplosivegirl @dreamingwithlens @xoxmariaxox @911ls-tarlos @iamasimpingh0e @i-like-sparkly-things @herecomesthewriterwitch @liampayne88 @glitterquadricorn @luvreading67 @smoothdogsgirl @afriendlyneighborhoodhufflepuff @actlikesummerr @lcothr523 @star-wars-lover

[bil-daddy]

Final Update on My Date with Aziraphale

It was a close race, but between not taking Aziraphale to Hell (he wouldn't like it) and taking him to Alpha Centauri instead, not taking Aziraphale to Hell won out.

Taking him to Hell was never really an option. Glad all but 1% of people who voted agreed. (Those 1% though...I'd be enjoying my last days as human if I were you, cause you're all getting turned into lizards as soon as I figure out who and where you all are.)

Course that means I can't tell him last night was a date. Angels and demons don't go on 'dates' (even when they do). And for Aziraphale's own peace of mind, it's best he doesn't know I'd ever hoped we might.

But while I can't tell him it was a date, I can help him with his identity crisis. Let him know he's not a demon just because he told a little fib.

No one'll ever even know so long as we don't tell anybody. I mean I'm certainly not gonna say anything.

And when I asked Aziraphale if he planned to tell anyone, he shook his head no. Then, he asked me "But what I am I?"

So, I told him.

I already knew what he was gonna say to that.

And I thought I knew what he'd say next. I thought he'd call me out for lying to him, saying it wasn't lonely being on my own side, a demon going along with Hell as far as I can, but no farther.

But what Aziraphale actually said surprised me.

And me--being the self-sabotaging, second-guessing, insecure snake that I am--just couldn't take that for the win it was.

I had to say something stupid.

After all, Hell's crowded as well, Hell. And I'm still lonely as Heaven.

It's probably the same for Aziraphale, too. Can't imagine him being all that chummy with Gabriel and the rest.

That's when I realized I'd fucked up.

Aziraphale had just reached out, in his own careful way, and I'd shot him down like an enemy plane, when he was just trying to be a friend.

I had to fix this.

Aziraphale thought about it for a moment. And then, he turned to me and smiled. It was hesitant, scared even, but it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

(But then, I think that about all of Aziraphale's smiles.)

It was gone in a flash, like the sun peeking out from behind a cloud then getting covered again, and he quickly looked away. But I saw it. And I'll always remember it.

I'll always remember what he said, too.

We sat in companionable silence after that, watching the sun go down over the water.

When it was nearly dark, I remembered Sitis' offer to come for dinner, which I'd brushed off with a rain check (not actually intending to ever follow through).

Now, I'm not usually much for food (snake digestive system--can't have too much at a time). But, as we learned from the now infamous Ox Rib Incident, Aziraphale definitely is. So maybe Aziraphale might like to have dinner with the Job Family.

I asked him what he thought. Did he want to go to dinner at Job and Sitis' place? Not with me or anything, of course. I'd just, you know, happen to be there too, since we both had invitations.

And he said...

[midwinterwings]

Sup fellow entities beyond mortal comprehension how y'all doing

Just documenting some updates before I go again.

Summary: will be going through the results of my latest reflection and stuff I've learnt that I think may help other struggling otherkins

So, I found that going off tumblr really helped me reflect. I fell under the trap of thinking I didn't know enough but I did know enough. I think for now I'm not planning to...absorb more info as of now - I have more than enough just to mull over and reflect on.

I've really come to understand my identity better. Being deitykin is a funny business because I feel it fills every aspect of me. Although I don't think everything I present as is "all Loki" as in the stereotype, the myths, at the same time, everything I do is just very..Loki. I initially thought I could compartmentalise deitykin stuff and focus on working through other stuff because...Well...I got a lot to work on. But I found it all kind of ties back to being deitykin. The better I feel, the more aligned, the more calm, the more I can feel I'm...just Loki. Like man. I don't really know how to explain it.

Its definitely something only I can tell. An observer wouldn't be able to tell if I'm feeling aligned at all. It's like that post I made earlier - that being the truest version of yourself is the purest form of being a (insert entity). Only you will know, really, when you feel the most (insert entity) because it probably won't align with the stereotype or match with the myths exactly...or not at all, since its not surprising a physical manifestation of that entity would be expressed in a different way to how they're portrayed or experienced in the 'spiritual realm'.

*coughs* the denial method wasn't doing me any favours huh anyway if anyone here is in denial, from someone who has a PHD in denial, just...don't. Its not going to work.

Oh, by the way. Some good news - I think it's perfectly possible to live in the mortal plane and enjoy life while acknowledging you might not be exactly mortal - as in, experiencing the same kind of humanity as most people. Apparently most people don't feel like they're otherkin haha, I don't really get it. I still have a feeling that everyone is otherkin but just hiding it - but I felt that same way about being asexual, and apparently a lot of people aren't...asexual. mind blowing.

Anyway, I've laid off diving head first into paganism. I consider myself a pagan but I live more by the values, I don't really do much. I do have an altar for Hel and I think we have a very deep connection, and she often just vibes with me, but that's it, I never really reached out to anyone, or planned to, Hel sort of found me so I've just accepted it, and my experience of her is that she is quite sassy and very nice. I plan to honour her more when I'm.. yk..less depressed and rotting in bed, for now tho we just chill together.

But apart from that, I'm not pursuing or practicing anything, and I thought before if I didn't, I would never feel aligned or content. But...that's not true. I've tried to talk to Loki to get answers but...I don't think he's gonna speak to me anytime soon, if ever. And besides, I am kind of doing it anyway...since I'm loki, and I got answers. Lol. Don't need to do anything else. So...I guess I did do what I wanted.

Not that I don't want to work with other Deities in future, I definitely do want to actually work with Hel for real, and talking with myself would be cool and I do want to worship other gods too. Because yeah. Buuuuuut....if I never get to do it, I'll die happy. Its not necessary to understand myself. Maybe in the future I will but not right now, I don't need to and I never needed to.

Anyway....what I've learnt from all this hard work:

1. You CAN live in this mortal plane, fully enjoy it, do mortal stuff, vibe as an entity in a flesh suit, AND be fully happy and content. You don't need to miss who you were or who you are spiritually. I've only got a glimpse of what it feels like, but I know it's possible because I've got a taste.

2. Keep working, going to therapy, sorting out past trauma, etc etc. Because the more you do 'deitykin unrelated work', the more you feel yourself, and therefore more YOU. As in, otherkin you as well. I'm saying deitykin because I am one but this applies to everyone. You'll just feel more comfortable as you all round.

3. Take this otherkin stuff seriously. If this isn't a phase for you, don't ignore it. This is personal experience btw - maybe it's not the same for everyone but I think it might be useful - I've found being otherkin literally makes up my entire being, body and soul. Like, everything I do is part of being Loki. If I feel calmer I feel more myself and the feeling of being Loki - myself, just existing and being - is overwhelming. "Woah I just...exist..dude. Without constant anxiety or pain. Yayyyyyyy"

Yeah I've.. been through a lot haha. Maybe if you had a relatively untraumatized life you'd be like 'huh bro what I always feel like myself' lmao. But it's not like that for me.

But if you've a lot to work through don't bury being otherkin and dismiss it as insignificant.

4. Only you will know when you're fully "insert entity". And by that I mean completely aligned, comfortable, calm, joyful, etc. It may present as completely different as what the stereotype for your species is, but only you will know. Don't let anyone tell you you're not really X because you don't X. They're dumbos. Again, I know its possible.

(Not so) funny story: I figured out I actually don't have a connection to fire all that much. I know the whole 'Loki is a fire god' thing was a mixup between Loki and Logi but he's so associated with fire I found it weird I didn't really, after reflection. I found out what I thought was fire was acrually extreme weather events, howling winds, biting cold winds, etc, sky related stuff. I also have a strong connection to flying - not with wings, but at fast speeds like stepping on wind and letting it carry me. I'm too tired to explain why this might not deviate as much as I thought- or even at all, but...yeah. its acrually not exactly completely strange for me to be this way as Loki. There's this whole sky treader/sky walker thing...haven't done enough reading into it yet but...yeahhhhh. the whole identifying with wind thing might not be as weird as I thought.

5. When in doubt, getting off tumblr may help clear things up. I went off it kind of to see (again, PHD of denial) if the feelings would go.

Nope. They got more intense. Haha, figures. The happier I am, the more I feel I'm definitely Loki. Figures...

But what I did find out my identity as a kelpie was a coping kin and I don't really identify as one if I'm not depressed. I think I'm back to identifying as a therian again, swifts and swallows and hummingbirds being what I am, since I actually not only feel a connection to the sky and wind, but I've been a bird since I can remember. My first sona when I was 5 was a bird. I always asked to play games where I would fly and I always wore wings lmao.

Looking back now it's so obvious I was a bird...but yknow depression happens and kind of makes everything stupid.

By the way I did question a lot of things, and temporarily considered I was actually Hermes and I just got confused, especially since I identified as Hermes when I was younger...but I'm definitely not Hermes lmao, I dont feel a connection with pretty much every part of him. The only reason I did identify as him was before I knew who Loki was, he was very speedy, and he was a trickster. All things in common with my identity xd.

I still identify as a snake, kind of, but physically a bird. Snake concept. I identify with the archetype of the trickster fox but only because foxes association with tricksters, I'm not really a fox.

5. Kind of 4 but speaking of 'only you know how to be your authentic self as X creature' don't take the stereotype of what your source does as gospel or more valid than hobbies or interests which deviate from your source. Sure, you can try out stuff your source does/did but you shouldn't really consider them 'WHO I SHOULD BE AND ACT BC I AM THIS'. Its more of a 'hey. Angels are associated with harps. I'm an angel, harps look kind of cool, might try playing one. OK uh. I hate harps lmfao. Never mind. "

More of inspiration and help, shouldn't be more important or valid than other hobbies...like skateboarding or something unrelated to your source xd. I mean yeah of course you didn't skateboard in the myths because they weren't invented yet. Imagine skateboarding in Heaven lmao, you'd fall right through the clouds.

6. Very cliche, but with this sort of thing the only thing you can do is follow your gut, and trust your instinct. You'll probably never be definitely sure you're X entity and that's how it'll be. But honestly? The whole 'I need definitive truth or I don't believe it' is a relatively new mindset, since I guess science is the new god now. But science constantly shifts and changes and people in 50 years could look back and go "ohhhh shit that 'ultimate truth' we found out back then was incredibly racist and inaccurate". So don't listen to those bullshitters who prattle on about "ultimate TruTh ProV E iT but hOw dO yoU really Know"

(For me the bullshitter was myself. I'm my worst bigot smh)

Of course, have a healthy bit of doubt, reflect, always be opened minded. But keep it HEALTHY and its OK to say what you are, even if you don't have 'proof'.

Yep. I'm done. Also, by the way, the reason I'm posting this stuff is 1. To document my progress because I can only keep up if I'm public and 2. To try to give other otherkins, deitykins especially, a closer look into the life of another deitykin and how they live. Lastly, some advice which I feel could help an reduce distress - basically stuff I wish other people told me.

I do NOT claim to be an expert, far from it, I'm just a guy navigating this extremely finicky business and I genuinely think my posts may help a depressed deitykin out there who may see themselves in my posts. Please use your brain lol and don't take my words as 100% ultimate truth correct and DO talk to me about it in dms or asks if you want to challenge/add stuff to my current advice! Please, i feel I'm screaming into the void here. I'm always open to some deep deitykin talk - dms, discord or VC. I'm not as active right now but I will be coming back to update and respond as needed.

Yeah, anyway, bye folks

Also I'm probably going to change my username...again...soon. to a more neutral name this time in case I find out I'm not a bird or something and it's another depression brain warp. Bye

[dayseedrawz2]

DayseeDrawz2 MasterPost!

[Asks/Drawing requests: Open] (PLEASE READ BEFORE ASKING OR GIVING REQUESTS)

Hi! Hello! This is my first proper introduction post thingy- so it's probably gonna be a little bit short and messy, but I'll definitely update it as I go.

Some Fandoms I'm In/ been in [To be updated]:

Super Mario

I've been a huge fan of mario games since u was little (you could probably guess from my user)

I'm also working on a big AU for it called [Nintendo Studios]. you can learn more about it on my youtube channel! (I'm working on a big project related to it right now, actually)

Any questions about it can be asked in the askbox!

The Amazing Digital Circus

Currently one of my big hyperfixations (as you can probably tell already)

I am working on an AU for this one, too! [The human Caine AU] I have an askblog for it as well, so you can ask questions here or ask Caine directly! (The blog will be located at the end of this post)

The Henry Stickmin Collection

One of the first fandoms I made content of! Also, the reason why I still draw only stick figures to this day...

About The MOD:

I am Mod Daysee! As in the name of most of my socials, but I can go by either that or Ellen, which is my sona I use. I use her more on my Youtube channel [Same as my user] than here, but I will try and use her here too!

[THE MOD IS A MINOR SO ANYTHING NSFW WILL NOT BE INTERACTED WITH AND THOSE WHO STILL BRING IT WILL BE BLOCKED]

Asks and Requests:

I can do basically anything with asks and request as long as it isn't NSFW.

Here's all the other blogs You can ask things in!

AU Caine: @ask-the-real-cainetadc

Pomni: @the-exitdoor-simp-tadc

Gangle: @happy-sad-ribbon-tadc

My Tadc OCs! @marip-osa-tadc (I you can ask both of them there or here! Voz and Osa. More about them in a different post)

That's about it for now! Thank you for reading!

[magpies4nights]

21, Falling Down the Stairs (Dev log #16)

Well, it’s been an uneventful 2 weeks since I’ve last updated y’all. I’ve completely finished the computer thing I showed y'all last time, teehee. I'm not gonna say what exactly it is but there's a good route and a bad route, I guess you could say lol. I also made some more sprites because it made me really mad. Therapy <3333

Scale Dummy core teehee

I still haven't figured out the optimizing thing though, because every tip I could find was for 3d stuff, and the 2d questions would always be "answered" with "why do you need culling for a 2D game? It has less data." THIS SCENE IS SO HEAVY MY COMPUTER CRASHES WHEN IT'S NOT IN THE EDITOR, AND IT'S FROM 2019!!! THAT'S NOTHING IN AGE!!!! Wait, is it something??? I don't even know anymore god how long ago was 2019?? Arg.

(AI disturbance overlay from: https://www.tumblr.com/arson-jellyfish69/750555399114080256/put-these-on-the-top-layer-above-everything-set)

But anyways, I'm pretty sure if I got a brand spanking new computer and I ran that puppy on the computer it would start coughing and dying. I've also been thinking of updating the demo again, because I kinda feel bad that it's been left untouched since like May, and some things have changed. Maybe mid June???? July???? I don't know. I'll definitely change the secret room, because I realized if people discovered it by now, they probably are walking into the walls and not realizing it because they are invisible, I remember once I was showing one of my friends that room and she did that and I had to help her. I am top 10 game designers, I know /j

...Anyways, I can't think up on references right now, my brain is mush LMAO. however, since it's pride month...

Yeah, we got the pride flags out. Huah. (not a ship. They're related and Priyah is a minor)

I would have put my headcannons for the cannon GASA4AM:SC characters but They're pretty much popular headcannons sooooo, yeah. lmao. I also kinda don't feel like drawing anymore right now.

Well, I don’t know if I can talk about my life anymore. It’s for personal reasons, honestly. All I can really say is that the weather has been crazy, there was a time when the region I lived in had no power for several hours because of a storm, and that I started summer classes. They are pretty hectic, I'm not gonna lie. I ended up with health problems, AGAIN, so now I'm eating the world's most blandest foods until I'm in better shape. Which honestly I'm thinking it's when they end and I'm guaranteed passing grades (I'd be so happy if I get 70's). I wish I could say what’s on my mind, but right now I can’t. I honestly don’t know when I can again. It’s not for professionalism, I honestly doubt my future employers will somehow link this back to me, as much as I feel like people will try to dig up my past and my present. I'm thinking though once I'm done with this fan game I might have have to stop making games under this name, as gut wrenching as that is. I had to come to that realization, I was incredibly disappointed, trust me. I've been thinking on this since March when my dad was mad at me but if I want to make money, I'll have to go under a different name. I'll see you there when I crossed that bridge though, I'm not going anytime soon with the way this fan game is going LMAOOOO.

[kitsoa]

Since becoming a partial/full-time mute with my diagnosis, I keep thinking maybe I'll gain better habits about interjecting literally anything that comes to my mind during casual conversation. But nahhhh I'm pretty sure it's making me worse. I can feel myself vibrate with tangible thoughts as my siblings are musing about shit. I'll type it in my speech reading app but it takes too long. And then I have to type preemptively knowing I'm gonna lose the context of my comment. Positively maddening.

It's hard for me to express my support or feel like an attentive and positive friend. I've already had to clarify to a friend of mine that I'm not harboring any hostile feelings. I'm pretty good at communicating that usually. My ASL lessons have paused a little as I prioritize just isolating myself instead of the temptation of just being with people. I have to mentally prepare before social situations cause I have to condition myself to be cognizant of my choices. It's not good to isolate, but like, it's probably where I am most comfortable right now.

My recovery timeframe has extended significantly since my recent check up. I hit the 2 month mark on Monday and I will have a follow up with the same prescription of tasks in another 2 months. If surgery is brought up, I have zero clue how I'm going to begin the next teaching year under the restrictions of surgery recovery which is remarkably more unforgiving than what I'm doing now. I'm only grateful that I'm hitting the summer break soon. I hate that I'm not working, but I'm actually opening up painting commissions to help my situation out. My greatest worry is that this won't be enough.

Some pros right now is that I'm losing weight with all this rest and strict diet, though it's occurred to me I've got some nutrients deficiencies since I was exhausted shopping at a super market with my mom. Haa. The free time away from work, though ending very soon, has been the biggest weight off my shoulders and it has me rethinking how I commit myself to things.

Emotionally I've been struggling with the lack of singing. I was told not to listen to music that much to help with this but I can't really follow that. I just want to sing. And sing loud. And sing joyfully. And sing with my friends and strangers alike. It makes me so happy to just use my voice frequently and casually. I visited the church I work at for the first time in many weeks and it was pleasant to see people and they missed me, but sitting in the congregation with the damn hymnal unable to sing just rubbed salt in the wounds. I don't think I'll be going again at least for a few weeks.

This is probably where I'm most honest about this journey as I have so many faces to upkeep on Facebook. I can't imagine telling all my acquaintances the bad news that this effort is not paying off as much. What started as a silly musing about being a little adhd chatterbox turned into an entire update haha. I got this...