#This is just how I feel internally and what I project to the world ig

[blue-banditt]

im mentally deteriorating [my art]

[alacants]

re: the juanki/rafa lore. i wonder if you have any thoughts about their respective academies? the more i read about ferrero's academy, and how it's been this slow, long process started by ferrero's coach and like they all still live there and make improvements vs. rafa's just kind of springing into existence in 2017 i do wonder if that caused any feelings lol. there was that one interview where juanki said "i don't think it's right to just put your name on smth and show up 3-4x a year" lol

HA god i can’t believe i didn’t think to incorporate that angle—great point, that zinger was not meant to be subtle. that it can be overlooked out just bears out your point, really. equelite is fundamental to any consideration of juanki and Rafa Nadal Academy By Movistar is more or less an entirely separate entity from rafa nadal the person.

to be fair i understand it's more or less toni nadal’s project? (what isn’t toni nadal’s project…) but also—it’s part of the rafa nadal empire. the rafa nadal industrial complex. are they even competing for the same market share? i don't know enough about that market to judge—my gut says no, and i would imagine that to juanki it must feel to some extent like apples and oranges. but also, i'm sure, like who the hell do you think you are. perfect opportunity to claim the moral high ground AND the martyr's mantle.

(btw i remember hearing something about young jannik sinner being... invited? to the rafacademy, but it cost too much. can't for the life of my track that down so if anyone reading this remembers that please share because THAT is a fascinating alternate history lmao.)

it’s really just their image clash writ large, isn’t it. "the best in spain" vs "the best in the world." "achieve your goals" vs "the sky’s the limit." "it's not about me personally, also there's a giant mural of my face in the cafeteria" vs "the rafa brand is our most valuable asset and it would be idiotic not to leverage that." the natural counter-positioning to Extraterrestrial Star is Humble and Hardworking, and if you don't shape your own image someone else will shape it for you.

here are two world number ones who have made their sleepy hometowns (or as-good-as) the locus of their post-competitive networks. now let's see how different they could possibly be. toni cascales advised juanki from day one to diversify for both financial and psychological reasons, so there was the academy. the hotel. the winery. the valencia open. these are all very, like… reasonable projects. they probably seemed ambitious at the time! Meanwhile In Manacor, we've got the rafa nadal museum, the rafa nadal sports centre, and the rafa nadal international school. ngl as very much NOT a rafa expert i went to double check my hazy recollections of scale and the reality vastly outstripped them lmao. they've even got their own juicy urban planning war!

(an interesting aside here is that in 2014 jcf academy… well whether they opened a branch in shenzhen or just lent their brand to the enterprise is sort of an open question. it was certainly presented as a branch of jcf academy, in cooperation with gemdale/hongjindi sports, but now it seems to be operating entirely under the hongjindi name. this is relevant only in the sense that it’s interesting to see these sort of tentative overtures that ultimately either were withdrawn or petered out. whereas a friend recently told me about the ig ad they got for a rafa nadal academy seminar in a suburb of boston.)

this is extremely rambling and discursive lmao SORRY. i have a lot of thoughts in general about juanki and the academy that is his parent/child/home/cult/identity/locus of self/ready-made magical realism prompt. is it a piece of him or is he a piece of it. did he make it or did it eat him. the fact that toni cascales still introduces himself as "juan carlos' coach, i'll be his coach for the rest of my life." i imagine that you in particular, op, have already seen this but for those interested in this topic who haven’t, watch no strings: juan carlos ferrero from (iirc) 2005 to get a glimpse of just how deeply juanki is embedded in the place, how it’s grown around him literally from day one. "he likes racing so we built him a race course here on the campus. so he can be safe. :)"

it's in the eye of the beholder as to whether you find this wholesome and heartwarming or a seething hotbed of unexamined hangups. guess which side i come down on!

[ravenkinnie]

is it wrong for me to think that jinx's character is just sexier with her staying mentally unstable sjdkldkdldldl like everyone out here wanting her to get therapy and get better while here i am wanting her to remain insane😭 i love her daddy issues. i love the stupid insane shit she does bcs of her sister's rejection of accepting her. i want her hatred for caitlyn to never improve and keep going feral whenever she sees cait so much as within 5 feet radius with vi. i love that she's a walking ticking timebomb. i hope she never stops being a disaster magnet to those around her and keeps having complex feelings about being seen as a jinx. i hope her guilt of ruining both her adoptive families never recovers. i want her to keep stewing in her own agony and see the shit it does to her and those around her and see how it makes things even worse for her. i want her to have a hand in it all so her guilt and insecurity of being bad luck keeps eating at her and see her take all the internal turmoil to the outside into more horrifying violence.

ofc i want her to have character growth too but i want all of the above to also stay inside her in some shape or form throughout any development she might get. like they're all what makes her so damn interesting?? like ig there are stuff u can still do with her character even if she does improve mentally but ngl hot take i suspect there are those who want her healing arc not mainly out of care but bcs her character comes off too strong for them so they want the show to make her easier to digest/more palatable/just dont like seeing how ugly female characters' psychology can get

it's probably wrong in the sense that some chronically online thembo with a picrew pfp would tell me on twitter that I'm fetishizing her mental illness or sth but personally. I am fetishizing OUR mental illness, get it right. I don't want to see therapy, i don't want to see open conversations or healing or redemption, have you ever tried to heal from something irl?? that shit is so boring, endless spiral into madness is so much more fun. I think it's both washing her out to a more palatable character and some people just project on jinx and project the healing they want on her but like I'm sorry why would I want a boring regular person version of a character when I could have the absolute worst insane version of them instead

when she killed silco I was dripping down my thighs, I want her to ruin vis life, to ruin zaun as a whole, become destroyer of the worlds or whatever, fully lose touch with reality. if silco was still alive I would want her to be like 35 still sitting in his lap except the older she gets the more uncomfortable this situation is to everyone around them. I hope she kills God himself idc

[bearseulgs]

enhypen's reaction to their s/o dressing nicely for an important meeting

gn!reader x ot7

genre: fluff

wc: 1070

warnings: none that i've found !

requested!! tysm

- ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ Heeseung ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

you hadn't informed him of tonight's big meeting at the company that you're interning for 😭

it was a staff only event meant to discuss the details on their new marketing project

so you hadn't deemed it important for him to know

so you can imagine his surprise when you walk out in a new outfit looking expensive af (slay)

"hey honey... do we have a date tonight? did i forget?" he asked, already pulling out his phone to check his calendar

you had to assure him that there was no date and he hadn't forgotten before explaining that you had a meeting to attend

when he calmed down, he didn't say much but his mind was running a mile a minute

a bit jealous that your coworkers get to see you like that but he doesn't 💔

gives u many many kisses before you leave mwah

- ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ Jay ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

your # 1 hype man fr

you told him that your workplace had an opening event tomorrow and that you had a company-wide meeting today to discuss any last many details and go over the plan once more

but OH NO 😱 you didn't know what to wear DUN DUN DUN

lucky for you you have the handsomest most fashionable bf in the whole wide world to help you teehee

so OFC Jay over here raids both your and his closets looking for the perf fit for you bc his angel has to look the prettiest it's just a last minute brief chill

once y'all finally pick out smth for you to wear, you go change and come out and WOAH he must've seen a real angel this time bc you look amazing

he thinks he fell in love all over again 🥹

sends you off to your meeting with the proudest smile on his face bc that's his s/o

- ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ Jake ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

knew about the meeting

you practically had to rely on him to be your calendar bc even when you write things down you forget them 💔 (me too babe dw)

so he understood that you were presenting your new product plan to your boss today

he just didn't understand why you had to do it wearing his favourite outfit of yours 🤨

like excuse you how dare you look so good and walk out that door AWAY FROM HIM

doesn't say anything tho bc you're his pretty lil darling and he loves you ☺️

buys you new accessories while you're at your meeting as a treat for himself 😭

- ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ Sunghoon ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

you actually work at Music Bank woot woot!!

you had recently been promoted to creative directer and you were presenting your first ever ideas for possible sets for upcoming performances (hang with me here idk how mubank staffs work)

and the MCs had to attend bc idk their companies like to see them suffer ig

but they weren't suffering bc you're besties w Wonie and ofc you have your lovely bf Hoon 💞💞💞

Sunghoon didn't actually know that you were giving the presentation so when he walked in on you and Wonyoung chatting he stopped dead in his tracks bc holy cow they're good looking 😳

could not get over the fact that he's dating you

eventually got cocky and started bragging about it to everyone who would listen (read: you and Wonyoung) that he has the prettiest s/o ever aw

- ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ Sunoo ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

you were the CEO's assistant so you had to go with her to all of her important meetings

this time y'all were meeting with a partnering company to discuss product promotions

and you wanted to look your absolute best to give your company a good image!! especially since your boss won't be there today due to her kid having the flu so you had to take over for her ᕙ(  •̀ - •́  )ᕗ

you woke up, made breakfast, showered, got dressed, and when you came out all ready Sunoo was sitting down eating brekky

he looked up when you entered and he gasped so big that you were worried he'd choke 😭

nonstop praises from your bf, he had to make sure that you knew your worth

needless to say, you left with a huge smile on your face and feeling more confident than earlier

- ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ Jungwon ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

your job was mostly work from home so you didn't typically dress up much

but the CEO of your location called for a big meeting that everyone needed to attend (i hope y'all know what i mean by your location, like the building you would work at if you weren't working from home)

so you got to dress fancy woo!! :D we love dress up

it was a kind of last minute message though, only 2 days advance, so you didn't really have time to go shopping and had to work with what you had

but that's okay bc you're cute af 😘

on the day of, you spent the morning getting some work done and preparing for this afternoon's meeting

on your way out the door, you passed your boyfriend in the living room and told him you were headed out

"okay- dang"

"what?" you asked, cocking your head, but he said nothing, just looking away to hide his flustered expression

you shrugged and didn't think much of it, heading to your meeting, but you stayed in his thoughts all afternoon

when you got home that evening he made sure to give you all the compliments 🥰

- ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ Ni-ki ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

you have your first ever job interview omg!!!

you spent like two weeks planning your outfit and scripting responses to possible questions lol

but finally the day has come and you were ready to ace this interview!!

you had on a cute set of clothes that you had bought when you and Riki went to the mall w some friends and did your makeup nice and neat and innocent and professional

but you were still nervous ㅠㅠ

so you fted Riki like 5 minutes before you had to leave so much for great planning asking what he thought of your outfit and boy was STUNNED

like,,, speechless

eventually you got worried bc what if he doesn't like your outfit but he doesn't want to hurt your feeling and that's why he isn't saying anything 😣

but that was far from the case

he broke out of his spell after a minute and started praising you nonstop

before you hung up he wished you luck on your interview and kissed the screen 🥰

a/n: omg this was so fun to write bc it's like an idea always in my head, anyways stay stunning babes!! ALSO SORRY THIS SUCKS ㅠㅠ

©️ bearseulgs 2022

[luna-writes-things]

Phoenix

Summary: Gingerbrave was no common cookie. The world ranked him lowest because it didn't know he was special to begin with. It's just that there wasn't anyone nor anything quite like him to classify his existence.

Or, Gingerbrave wasn’t afraid of fire. Logically speaking, he should.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Fandom: Cookie Run (Video Game)

Relationship: GingerBrave | Brave Cookie & Everyone

Characters: GingerBrave | Brave Cookie, Other(s)

Additional Tags: Angst with a Happy Ending, Heavy Angst, Introspection, Unreliable Narrator, POV Multiple, POV Outsider, Symbolism, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Major Character Injury, not graphic, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Not Really Character Death, Nihilism, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Discovery, Author projecting onto Gingerbrave, This Is Not Going To Go The Way You Think, This is mainly just me going off about my own headcanons in a more storytelling way, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Cookie Run Characters Have Human Traits, Cookie Anatomy (Cookie Run), Ancient AU with a twist ig. Out of Character. I suddenly know too much phoenix myths now, technically can be read as any lore except the chinese version, No we are not pulling yin yang duality and polarity stuff here, I can not physically nor mentally handle that, The Author Regrets Everything, I STILL have 7 more in my docs, Gotta get this finish first before the Devsisters made an actual Phoenix cookie, In which author try not to strangle herself because she kept repeating the word dough

Word Count: 2579

Gingerbrave wasn’t afraid of fire. Logically speaking, he should. (Internally, he wished he was. It would be so much simpler that way).

When he woke in The Oven, the flames had roared from beneath and in all directions, hungry, eager to swallow him whole. It crackled, the sound mixed with the screams, the pleads of his siblings. The unbearable heat left him dazed, his thoughts a jumbled mess, limbs sluggishly moved through the feverish trance.

Even so, his instincts screamed for him to act despite his mind barely registering the situation. Even before his eyes could adjust, he already knew what must be done. (run, escape, survive, save, run, escape, survive, save, run, escape, survive, save, run, escape, survive save, run–).

His vision was obscured by the scorching flare of yellow, orange, and red that it was incredibly difficult to even identify himself, let alone others. He was as good as blind. Scanning survivors with such a sight might seem quite idiotic (and it was), but Gingerbrave had forsaken common sense for his sense of duty from the very beginning of his existence.

Trying to rescue his siblings was too, a gamble already lost, seeing how most of them were crumbling, dying even when peeled off the metal tray, even with his guidance. He could see their sugar slowly darkened and layers of dough increasingly getting thinner. (They were falling apart right next to him and he–he. He couldn't do anything).

It seemed he was doomed with poor judgment because even after all of that, he just had to throw himself at the massive door as well. In retrospect, it was an impossible task, an unlikely attempt to open the tightly shut gates. But with the push from the others from below combined in, it was just enough for them to crack and collapse, taking him along in a deafening crash.

(That groundless feeling was oddly mesmerizing, absolutely breathtaking that he had overlooked the fact that he shouldn't be able to jump—no—to soar through the air so high, so gracefully and how unbelievably powerful his kick was to crack the heavy steel, because he knew well that he was already falling before the others had gathered their all and pushed their last time. It's just a split second of difference, he reasoned, he alone was nowhere near enough).

The cool air brushed against his dough, a stark contrast to the hellish heat just mere moments ago that he shivered slightly at the abrupt change. He blatantly ignored how he almost missed the temperature from before.

The events after that played like old movie footage, a weird blend between smeared blurs and distinctively clear shards. None of them was related to fire though, so he needn't burden himself with those questions.

That was until the truth began to unravel before his eyes, one by one so he could no longer deny himself.

Gingerbrave had never been a Common cookie. This fact wasn't completely obvious at first though.

It started with the little things.

Exactly as the sun had risen from its slumber, pale light blanketed grassy meadows and painted yellow every corner it reached, he too climbed out of his bed and began his day. He was more precise than clockwork with his routine.

He also adored sunbathing. It was as much a hobby as it was a comfort. No matter the workloads or any specific circumstances that might arise, he always managed to spare at least 15 minutes to half an hour to this pastime every day without fail.

His touch has been described as "warm and soothing" countless times by numerous cookies before. Some random time during the day (sometimes it was even scheduled), some cookies would just flock into his space. There are cases that they approached to talk to him, or that they desired company, or just someone to listen to, (he didn't have much to tell, but he tried his best anyway), but most came to simply be by his side, consoled by his presence alone. The silence never really came off as suffocating, always just a serene, tranquil state where both parties enjoyed each other even without exchanging a thing between them.

With his vibrant and outgoing personality, it took no time for Gingerbrave to initiate a conversation and form bonds with others. Almost too effortlessly, in fact. He was a child filled to the brim with energy and vigor, but that kind of character could be overwhelming as well, depending on the time and person. But folks all-around would crowd at the kid's presence just with little interactions. It was strange how their views of him contradicted each other.

(Lots of them developed a liking to his playful attitude. Several admired his adventurous and daring spirit. Many saw themselves within him. Then there were numerous cases saying he possessed an aura of compassion, of safety, that they needn't fear for his judgment because he would understand even their worst crimes. Some spoke of a foreign kind of wisdom, far beyond their comprehension. And few confessed that in the shadow of a boy, they saw something so inexplicably vast and grand that they knew they would have to follow him).

He was a fast learner, despite all odds. Knowledge that peak his interest would come easily, the rest he (unconsciously) filtered out. He learned through actions rather than textbooks, so it took him a while to sit through all the talks about general cookies' mechanics and all that fun stuff.

(Recognizing this, they soon switched to illustrating or demonstrating to him more real-life related examples and less professional terms. He beamed at the change and took it in stride. It amazed his mentors how he could flawlessly memorize the same information he previously had been struggling with just by tweaking their methods a bit. Perhaps they could put the same effort into helping the other younglings?).

Then it became more noticeable.

His body’s temperature always remained moderately warm, a few degrees more than the average but not too high to be of concern. It wasn’t too weird of a thing, but the fact that he was always warm without any magical assistance (he was certain, looking back at his trips through snowy mountains and icy waters, wearing little but light clothes) and how he could, sometimes even unconsciously, emitted heat. It wasn’t that he could produce any real fire, embers or even smoke for that matter, but many of his fellow companions had always bundled closer to him when the cold crept up on them, and joked that he was like a mobile heater because even without direct contact, they could still feel the obvious warmth radiating from his body. He only shrugged and let them cling to him, not thinking much of their comment.

He was a Common cookie with few skills and cheap strategies, his only weapon being his trusty cane seeing as he did not have any magic at his disposal. Despite so, ever he would run ahead of the team and push back the enemies without a second thought. That, of course, had concerned a myriad of his friends on multiple occasions. Saying things like he shouldn't be so reckless and he could get hurt and various similar phrasings. (They always avoided talking about his actual capabilities though). He felt bad worrying them so much, but he couldn't help it. It felt right to lead. It felt right to attack first even without a plan. It felt right to bulldoze through the opponents' forces and push them back. And by following their shadows, by uselessly defending himself, he felt like betraying himself, his principles, his nature.

(Obviously, his reasoning would sound like nonsense. Therefore, usually, when people disagreed with his methods, he only laughed nervously then reassured them he would be fine and quickly changed the subject).

Gingerbrave often sang. With a childlike enthusiasm and bubbling voice, he would cheerfully do so, notes several tones wrong or the lyrics going all over the place, but most condoned it anyway because of the sheer joy and passion ever evident in the way he did all things. It wasn’t the only reason, however. The moment he had lost himself in his own harmony, in his own voice, his thoughts drifting to a realm they could not reach, sky blue eyes clouded with childish sparks dimmed, his style would shift into a calmer, almost wistful, indescribably somber tone. Among the lyrics, the stories he would tell were of many wonders. From thrilling events to tragic despairs to dreadful horrors to odd wordplay and morbid phrasing that all left a sense of awe to whoever listened. In those moments, they hadn’t seen a kid, because before them was a well-worn soul, forged through time and experiences.

Moreover, he had a bizarre mastery over his words. Often he found himself effortlessly forming speeches, encouraging words just at the tip of his tongue. Adding it with his keen eyes for people made him a remarkable therapist.

Even more exceptional was that this talent also could be utilized on the battlefield in an incredibly different manner. Inspirational speeches aside, before charging into masses of enemies, he would scream a true warcry, the sound booming through the entire area. It ranged from petrifying howls, heart-wrenching wails to monstrous growls or beastly roars, often depending on which effect he wanted it to do on which side. It was not an ability that was listed in his skill sets, but he had always used it, and it did serve as a tremendous power/mental buff to his allies or nerf to the other side. His vocal cords did kinda hurt after overusing though.

Finally, it morphed into feats that even he couldn't ignore.

There was grace in his wild movements, wisdom in his rashness. There were experiences akin to a veteran begind his actions despite his fledgling years of age. He swung his cane with perfect aim and lethal arcs if need be, elegant and flamboyant if wished.

His instincts, as well as intuition, were impossibly sharp. His reflex was the same, lightning-fast with killer precision. It was almost like he could foresee the future with how accurate his guesses and predictions were, even without him actually trying most of the time.

Each time he was injured or just physically harmed, even the smallest damage like a scratch, it felt like he was being set aflame—like—like he was back in the Oven again. The wounded area was the center of it, a thrumming, bristling blaze nestled under his dough (water, water, put it out, put it out, putitoutputitOUT— In spite of how realistic it had appeared, there was no fire and it was only his dough that got soggy afterward. Then the cycle repeated as his body continued to heal itself and he fret about the immense heat. He learned not to do that now) then the heat gradually spread to his entire being like a warm cloak, calming his nerves infinitely better than the cold water he had dumped on. (He frowned at how he found the warmth so reassuring when all it had done to him was just to inflict more pain and loss to his already miserable life). After enduring the worst of it, the wounds no matter deep or shallow, big or small, would all heal themselves, patches of open gashes instantly stitched and sewn back into normal as if nothing had ever transpired. (He could only pretend not to detect the trail of steam rising from them for so long—).

Leaving the most absurd quirk to last, Gingerbrave mused. Simply put, he couldn't die. He had been on the verge of dying more times than he could count and always escaped unscathed. He had had records of being poisoned, hit, thrown, yanked, stabbed, crushed, crumbled, disintegrated, dusted, frozen, drowned, and Ancients forbid, burned, but never could he edge near to his demise. Not once. Not with the insane and utterly outrageous regeneration of his. With it, he predicted that if he were ever to, perhaps, attempt to tiptoe between the line of the living and the dead, chances were he wouldn't even be allowed to slightly lean into whatever the other side of life may hold. It was that ridiculous.

Regardless of these irregularities, he still had many friends. Through time, he had learned that most of them had at least a few strange aspects of themselves also, so it felt nice, knowing he wasn't completely alone. At least fate or whatever didn't seclude him entirely from his peers.

The further he grew into the loving embrace of his friends, the better he accepted himself. And the more he came to terms with his nature, the more doubtful he became. Ultimately he had come to a startling realization.

He totally jinxed himself, didn't he? Gingerbrave cursed. Out of all time to be incorrect. Not only was he so different, but he might also be the only one of his—his kind? He couldn’t be something without a name, could he?

He couldn't be something that even the world ruled out. Because he made no sense. His body, his mind, and their anomalies. His abilities, his rank, his skill sets, his name.

(Gingerbrave? He wasn't made of ginger, his dough holding no such aroma or taste. Instead, his scent was of ashes, raw and bitter was his flavor, as tragic as that might sound. "Brave". The one word, the one trait that reflected, defined his entire existence. It wasn't fair letting it be the very thing that determined him. What if he strayed from it? If he yearned for fear? For safety? Would that be selfish? Would that be wrong, like the rest of him? What would he be aside from being " brave"? Would he be nothing if he wasn't?).

Everything about him was just a big jumbled mess of nothing but fabricated lies. They have been scorching, taunting, the fire of his nightmares. What had he done to oppose them, however? Absolutely nothing. He endured them without any resistance or pathetically ran away, suffering in silence. If that wasn't cowardice, then what was?

He paused.

As a cherry on top of his strangeness, he didn't really feel bothered, now that he understood. He just moved on, at ease with himself.

The world born him wrong, so what? He would render himself correct, would mend the world itself correct to his standard if the first option failed.

There were dragons, legends that could morph into forms, that ruled and destroyed with powers none could rival. There were gnomes, little creatures that aided in rebuilding a lost kingdom. Summons. Monsters. Spirit. Countless. There were many other beings aside from just cookies and he knew now that he was among them.

Even though he was the sole of his kind as of now, anything must have a beginning, right? What can he do except make it a good start?

[ Phoenix symbolizes the cycle of life, immortality, afterlife, rebirth, a second chance, a new beginning, transformation, growth, hope, creativity, protection, purity, time, and magic. In addition, it is linked with the celestial planet sun, the season of summer, and the element of fire. It also represents the process of overcoming darkness and rising to the challenge for success. It isn't a God in itself, but it is usually associated with powerful figures across many cultures and is a mythical, well-honored creature in all tales ].

[funkymbtifiction]

Why do you think the BHE crew + their fb group gatekeep 4s and soc-blind stacking so much? I understand that 4s and soc-blind users are less frequent than other types and instincts, but I don't know. The only avowed core 4s are two mods and the ex-SO from one of them. And the only collages typed as sx/sp in their ig account are by, again, two mods and the ex-SO again. There are some, but very, very few, whom have being typed as sp/sx. This, for me, is weird because according to their own literature is the three more common stacking, being sp/so and so/sp the more frequent. But, instead, there are tons of people being typed as sx/so, the least frequent (according to their site). I don't know, some things feel weird.

One could argue that soc-blind users don't tend to lingers in typology communities due their lack of needing to... well, connect. But, then, at least four of them have stated that they actually meet through typology forums. How can the mods be social blind and still building a huge community? It didn't happen by accident, they put effort on the site, the fb group, the pod... I don't know if I am making sense here.

I think the 4 thing and the social stacking thing are separate issues; one potential reason for them not typing many 4s or 4-fixers is that 4s don't ask for help. They are withdrawn types, which means they are self-reliant and not as inclined to ask for someone to tell them who they are -- they are busy projecting and cultivating who they are, every minute of every day. The one "for sure" 4 I know would never ask anyone else to tell her what her Enneagram type is -- but if you showed her a 4 description (not a 9-as-a-4 "happy" 4, but a real one) she would completely identify with feeling like a broken alien who got stuck here in a world where nobody understands her. It's similar to why so few 5s get typed -- they also don't ask for help as much. But the attachment types (3/6/9) want help the most, because they feel confused, may relate to multiple types (especially if 9, who "sees themselves in a lot of numbers"), and need others to affirm their evaluation; they also get "attached" to whatever type they think they are and can be defensive about it, since they are attaching to and using that type as a projection of "identity."

The second possibility is that tritype is not only nonsense and irrelevant, but a way to confuse the issue, explain away all inconsistencies, and make a wrong typing fit -- the ability to say "oh this person doesn't relate to this number, but that's just cuz of their second fix." IE, "I am a 4 with a 9 fix, so I don't broadcast my sense of alienation or negativity in order to keep others happy." Nah, you are just a 9 if that's the case. Actual 4s are frustration/reactive types, there is no repression -- repression is the realm of the 9.

Regarding the stacking issues... well, Emeka doesn't update the Instagram account that much, does he? I wouldn't know; I don't do most social media. The explanation might also be that social blinds wouldn't see the point of submitting collages (who cares what others think of me; I don't need their feedback) and that social-users are more inclined to share a lot of collages / make a lot of them, as a way to connect to others.

Joseph started the Facebook page -- he's a social-dominant; but I don't think most of the soc-blinds interact on social media much. But yes, they are building a following -- as a source of revenue (sp), because they want paid (a lot) to tell you who they think you are, based entirely on visual typing. They have assumptions about how certain types act, take photos, dress, what they put on their Instagram pages, and present themselves, and type you and/or celebs based off these things rather than internal motivations or core desires. If you wrinkle your forehead a lot, or are visually facially expressive, you are a 6, etc. They look at your Instagram page to see what stacking you are, then they watch your video on mute to visually type you, and then having decided what type they think you are, they listen to your video to see if what you say confirms their assumption.

If you feel something is "off" about them, use your discernment. Trust your instincts. Question everything you learn from them, to see if it makes rational sense. If it doesn't (such as "most people are sp/so, but we have mostly sx/so collages in our Instagram"), then take note of that inconsistency and use it going forward in being skeptical and seeking more evidence. If something seems wildly off, don't trust it.

[angelichl]

elaborate please, because i kind of agree with you

ok here we go (also jasmineinnyc on tiktok sums it up pretty well)

Harry’s fan base is mostly women/girls, and also ppl who will buy ANYTHING from him, as evidenced by lackluster merch and also concert tickets reselling at $1k+ that people somehow still buy. so starting a cosmetic line is the perfect way to make a ton of money!! which is the textbook definition of exploitation. not that there’s anything inherently wrong with that ig...

but there’s this disconnect between what Harry is saying in the dazed interview and what the brand actually is... that imo makes it seem like this is a money grab, not a passion project - ie, regarding Pleasing, they don’t care about anything but making money. which is fine ig but like the interview is a hot mess and it’s lowkey kinda embarrassing / not a good look for Harry.. he claims Pleasing is “about giving, and giving back” like giving back to the fans... but what is Pleasing giving exactly? $20 nail polish in the most common, basic colors ever? 🤨 there’s no charity attached, no special cause, not even working with up-and-coming designers or whatever. he also talks about how this started from seeing different colors in the world around him and wanting to turn them into nail polish, but if that’s the case, then why are the only colors white pink and black 😭

also, Harry said: “We also totally understand that we are putting more product into the world, so if we’re gonna do that, then we have to do it the right way.” but again. there are SO many cosmetic brands out there with these exact same colors, exact same skincare, etc it’s really not doing anything different at all so if you really care about the environment why would you contribute to the oversaturation and waste like that...

and then Harry’s comment about when he feels beautiful is SO tone deaf: “I don’t think being beautiful or feeling beautiful is about looking good. When people are happy and glowing, they’re radiating. And that’s what I think the products do, it’s about helping you feel beautiful.” He pauses thoughtfully, and repeats my question back to me, “Hmm, when do I feel my most beautiful? I would say internally, when I’ve finished meditating or something… Or maybe when I’m asleep!” he giggles. like king this is a cosmetics line, in which you’re literally selling products to ~enhance ppls physical appearance. how does this response make any sense????

listen, im not saying it doesn’t have POTENTIAL, bc it really does, and I would LOVE for him to do a nail polish line of really fun colors that he likes, and etc etc. and about self-expression, and doing what makes you happy / wearing what makes you happy, like his little spiel at love on tour every night. he’s just not going the extra step and it seems so weird and half-hearted

[frenchphobic]

long fucking post on why a c!dream is a shitty person and probably should not have a redemption because it is unpog

honestly i just want to refute dream apologists thats why im making this post. i think that dream as a villain is interesting but i think that trying to make him out to be secretly a good guy is just bad ngl. also /roleplay and all

tw for abuse and mentions of suicide

dream as a villain

dream is a villain. he is chaotic evil according to wilbur, deliberately does not stream to appear less sympathetic (and yet), and is set up as an antagonist to tommy who bears the title ‘hero’. dream is not a good person, no matter how you look at it or try to justify his actions.

‘but he wants to unite everyone to be a big family :((’ the ends dont justify the means believe it or not. having a vaguely positive goal does not excuse the actions you’ve done. it also goes hand and hand with saying dream is correct for punishing tommy the way he did because he acted up. if i socked you across the face and then suddenly said ‘sorry there was a roach on ur face’ does that make it okay? probably not i still punched you, enacting an unnecessary amount of violence. thats a very simple analogy i will admit and there are more complex comparisons. another example off the top of my head is say a child just scribbled all over you walls with crayons. would hitting them be a justified answer? if u said hes thats really fucked of u go seek help u loon. violence as a punishment is very toxic, just because it gets the job done does not mean it is okay. at the end of the day, you still committed this act and the harm you caused is real, having a good motive doesnt suddenly make it okay.

‘but tommy causes all of the conflict’ the disk war wasnt even caused by tommy, it was sapnap and then tommy got involved. and the reason why tommy even caused conflict was because of the discs, because he wanted them back. and most of the time there was a level of antagonism from another party, such as schlatt exiling him, dream taking the disks in the first place, dream threatening l’manberg. and if dream wanted to end the conflict so badly, why didnt he just give tommy back his disks? tommy upfront said everything started with the disks, so he wants them back so he could end the conflict. notice how after tommy got his disks back he has been staying out of conflict, apologizing to everyone, and the only bad thing hes done is try to scam people but everyone does that. this would have been the most peaceful option, yet dream chose the path that would further antagonize tommy which then draws everyone else into conflict. why did dream need to have leverage over tommy so badly? why did he want to hold power over tommy so badly? its because of control, and that’s ultimately dreams end goal. sure he wants a big server family, but would said family have a free will?

‘but dream is sad’ the thing is dream is completely at fault for everything that happened to him. he pushed away sapnap (and george ig). he tried to take control over the server and their possessions. literally everything that happened to tommy. literally everything involving ranboo. villains can be sympathetic, i am not arguing against that. but it does not mean that they should be left off the hook. that doesnt mean u should ignore the shit theyve done because ‘oh no theyre sad’ because it doesnt make anything better. dream had this shit coming for him.

now people also skirt around calling dream an abuser. which is fair ig, its a very loaded word. its much easier to say manipulated. that being said, dream can classify as abusive. and no, tommy is not abusive. abuse is about control and a power imbalance. dream has power over tommy, but tommy does not have power over dream, at least not in the way dream does. he’s taking back power to stand up for himself, dream uses power to control.

the reasons i listed for why dream is from the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project so if u want a source on that, there you go.

using coercion or threats: dream often threatened tommy, such as the pit thing and often employed violence on him. while normally this could be attributed to Normal Minecraft Player Go Smack. minecraft mechanics cannot always translate to real world since violence is pretty normal in minecraft however we also need to consider the context of the scene. dream gave an order, tommy refused, dream applies violence, tommy submitted. thats why its a threat, it has tangible effects that can correlate to real life.

using intimidation: dream blew up logsteadshire as a punishment. dream also destroyed tommys items anytime he visited. dream also hit tommy with his axe i believe. he killed mushroom henry, one of tommys pets.

Using Emotional Abuse: dream guiltripped the shit out of tommy for just hiding things and pinning the blame on tommy for just wanting his own private items. he definitely played mind games on tommy, pretending to be his friend. honestly i probably dont even need to go as in depth because it was so obvious.

Using Isolation: putting him in exile in the first place. destroying the bether portal so no one could visit tommy anymore. i really dont think i need to expand upon that.

Minimizing, Denying, and Blaming: dream in tommys stream when he got trapped said that exile wasnt that bad. he does shift the blame onto tommy for logsteadshire being blown up, even though dreams reaction was entirely unjustified for not listening and hiding.

Using Economic Abuse: see this is where i attempt to parallel minecraft mechanics to real life. obviously, there is no monetary system in place, so when i mean economic, i will use valuables such as armor, food, etc in place of currency. the idea behind economic abuse is to limit the victim’s resources so that they are dependent on the abuser and cannot escape. dream only really allowed tommy to have the armor he gave him while not giving access to armor so he does not regain a sense of power, and in the prison stream, dream holds all the potatoes which puts him in a position of power over tommy. this argument is more ambiguous i feel cause the whole minecraft mechanics thing is kinda weird so u don’t necessarily have to take this part in.

i feel like i need to emphasize this very strongly because dream is not a good person. abuse cannot and should not be a response to someone. its an awful mentality to have. i just want to prove the point that dream is not a good person, his reasons absolutely do not justify his actions.

what makes a good redemption

redemption arcs are tricky. when done right they are great. when done poorly, its a slap in the face. rn im going to establish a formula to what makes a good redemption with an example.

the most well known example of a good redemption is zuko from atla. first, its the magnitude of what theyve done and why. zuko did commit some shitty actions, since he was in a position of power in the fire nation but its because he is a child being abused and wanted to regain honor. zukos real awful acts was season 1 and the whole betrayal thing. thats not to say that zukos actions suddenly are okay, he did shitty things. but its something that can be traced to a higher entity or seem less malicious then the other villains. the thing also about the magnitude of actions is that there is a certain point of atrocities that there is no redemption. some people simply cannot be redeemed because the actions they commit are so ingrained in their character or the action itself has serious moral issues that it would just be wrong.

the next is acknowleding what they did was wrong. a genuine reflection on the self and analyzing what they did and why it was not okay. zuko realized what he did to uncle iroh was bad for example. he turned his back on his father, realizing he didnt and shouldnt seek acknowledgment from someone as heinous as him. its pointing out your actions and going ‘hey, this wasnt right i should not have done this’ and not even excusing ur actions. its also going straight for the root of the problem and figuring out to stamp it from the source. just because a character is sad does not mean they are reflecting, sometimes they are attempting to garner pity. it has to be direct and clear acknowledgement of the injustice.

and finally, an important part about redemption arcs is the actual redemption part. its when you make amends. zuko made amends with katara by trying to help her get revenge, he fought against the fire nation and tried to make things more peaceful in his rule. he apologized to iroh. an important part of the amends section is that it does have to be a genuine desire to change and become a better person, not to change a person’s perception of you. the thing is u cant expect a person youve hurt to forgive you. you cant expect people to be sympathetic towards you nor should u attempt to make urself sympathetic. u shouldnt be expecting a pat on the back or an award. redemption is about internal and character change.

why dream should not be redeemed

ive already established the key points to a good redemption (imo) but heres where dream falls short. his actions are extremely heavy so redemption may not even really be possible. abuse is not something you can wave off so it does cross to the point of fucked up. acknowledgement of what he did was wrong? all he said was that he changed, yet never explained why he changed or was too vague. he needed to label specifically what he did and bring it up. attempting to make amends? he’s been doing the exact opposite in fact he continues to manipulate tommy and ranboo. its not a genuine change. he is still repeating the cycle and has given no indication of ceasing. at the moment he does not have any signs of redemption.

and the thing is most of the attention around a dream redemption comes from either justifying his motives (which i do want to emphasize does not make anything suddenly okay) and because he is sad in prison sad face. these are not good reasons. its gonna pain me severely to bring this up but snape from harry potter does have some form of sad character ig yet he very much abused his authority to bully children as old as 11 just because he said ‘aight gonna die’ doesnt suddenly make his general bigotry and abuse suddenly okay there is a threshold. again im so sorry for using harry potter as an example none were coming to mind and i needed a popular one i do not like harry potter please dont say i do i would pass away.

and the last thing to consider is the audience. keep in mind that the audience is composed of minors and while yes there are adults, minors are the main component of the fandom. keep in mind that there are quite a few people who can relate to tommys character because they might be in the same position or have gone through his experiences. tell me what kind of message does it send to that audience that abusers can be redeemed. this is not a narrative u should push to this audience in these situations and the writers are seemingly aware of it. remember how in exile tommy spiraled into a suicidal mentality? consider how fucked of a message it would be if he just committed suicide instead of escaping abuse and attempting to recover from his experiences. tommy did an excellent job in not going that route and having a message of ‘it will not get better’. its the same thing here. victims are not obligated to care for or forgive their abuser, and portraying an abuser as sympathetic might fuck with the message a lot, even change their perception in that ‘oh, maybe my abuser was right, maybe they had a reason for treating me the way they did’. this is not to say that every victim watching this will internalize this message, but people also look up to these characters. there can be a degree of influence from the story onto oneself and thats the dangerous part.

conclusion

all in all dream is a shitbag asshole and probably shouldnt get a redemption because it would not be pog thanks for coming to my ted talk.

[michibikionmain]

This isn’t THE tommyinnit villain essay but it sure is one of them

Ok ok so 4 those of u who aren't on discord with me: i have two main essays that have been in the works for MONTHS, these being my Complete Dream character analysis essay going in-depth for nearly all of his canon interactions and finding his character traits and motivations through the story, and my Tommyinnit (and Wilbur Soot) were Always The Villains on the server essay talking about how the only reason so many people view them as the good guys or heroes is because we see the story from their perspective mainly. This essay? Is not either of those. BUT, it does go through a lot of my thoughts on Tommy and Dream’s characters so I figured I’d post it. maybe itll help me organize my thoughts 4 my Mega Projects lol

@ranboocore bc u helped me pop off on this so hard LMAO

Warning, it’s VERY Tommy Critical, what a suprise. I do not like Tommy as a character lol. idk what triggers yall might need me to tag but if u need one in particular pls lmn!

My biggest issue with tommy's character is that he SAYS hes learned but he never does he is exactly the same person he was at the start of the server just More Sad and with Trauma, when out of all the characters he's had the most push to change. c!Tommy is a very tell-don't-show character which can make it hard for some people to connect to him, especially those who don’t directly share his trauma or see themselves in his character. Of course, there is still a MASSIVE amount of people who relate to his struggles and thus love him regardless of his writing, but those who can't relate to him will always feel some kind of barrier until the things they've talked about are actually shown to the viewer instead of being spoon-fed to them.

It is a very beginner writing thing, and I'm hoping that Tommy is figuring out how to fix this, maybe with support from the many other writers on the server. There's the 3 you mentioned, plus fundy, niki, and maybe tubbo who also play dnd, plus Dream who said he would've been an English major and does a lot of personal writing for fun.  I think the biggest issue in the writing lies in the individual ccs being inexperienced in the medium, particularly with planning out their own character growth. 

Another glaring issue I have with c!Tommy is how he's framed to be sympathetic and he goes through all these horrible things without acknowledging his role in any of them. The things that have happened to him are a direct result of his actions, but the thing is HE won't acknowledge and so it falls flat. This isn’t to say that being abused is his fault, because it’s NEVER the vicitm’s fault, but being exiled? His multiple fights with c!Dream? His friendships falling apart? Losing the disks in the first place? They’re the direct consequences of HIS OWN actions, but he never acknowledges this and constantly just... brushes off any accountability by either saying that it’s Dream fault or simply SAYING he feels bad without properly showing it through redemption and GROWTH.

Denial is useful in storytelling sometimes, but Tommy's character has been in denial since the very beginning of the server and at this point it's just exhausting. He only ever switches between denial and depression, not really going through all 5 stages of grief properly. His violent/upset reactions would be more powerful if they were any different from how tommy usually acts, but this is always how he is. When he “lashes out” because he’s reached the end of his patience, it doesn’t SEEM like the snap it is because that’s just... it’s seriously just his standard reaction to everything. It hold no WEIGHT to see c!Tommy yell at someone violently or threaten to fight them because he does that anyways!

Static characters can be a good thing, and can be interesting if done correctly, but not every character SHOULD or CAN be static in a story.

Static characters need to have their position or behavior challenged and question, where they look into if the way they see and interact with the world is really the 'correct' one or just evaluated to see if they truly believe in them. This questioning period is CRUCIAL! and NEEDS to be well done in a way that ACTIVELY SHOWS the conflict between the two ideals. If they decide to hold onto their beliefs/continue their behavior then, it feels deserved, because rather than just being a flat "they do thing its who they are" they have defined WHY. WHY is a very important question to think of when telling the difference between dynamic and static characters. The why of a character is ESSENTIAL to developing them as a relatable, sympathetic person rather than a flat story telling device. It makes them a human rather than a puppet. When a character's motives aren't well defined or discussed, they're doomed to fall flat in everything else, because the WHY is the foundation of what makes them who they are.

c!Tommy has an underdeveloped "why", his motivations are weak, rarely properly discussed and when they are it doesn't particularly stick with him. His motivations change without showing us the internal struggle that should come from literally shifting your driving principles. There are some good MOMENTS of him reevaluating the importance of certain things, but they're so spread out and contradictory and immediately spat one that they're hard to piece together. He TELLS us what his motivations are as well, which is another big flaw when it comes to all that but we don't have time to unpack all THAT Anyways, the key to static story telling is reaffirmation. The character goes through a complete journey and ends with the same beliefs because they've looked into why they have them and determined that they still matter to them. A great example of static writing in my eyes is c!Techno, who since the beginning has believed that governments are bad. c!Techno enters the server to destroy a government, and still ends up doing that because he sees and we see him experience that the reasons he didn't like government before still hold true and he has no reason to support them any more than before, and so his anarchist beliefs are REAFFIRMED, proving to him that they way he handles things is the right one for him.

c!Tommy’s attachments are all just... they're all so weird.  like he LITERALLY SACRIFICES HIS LIFE MULTIPLE TIMES for L'manburg. By action of sacrifice it seems like it should be the most important thing to him, but then he throws it away for some disks that mattered less to him just a minute ago.  But then it's all about how c!Tubbo is worth more than Anything and maybe he's found something more important! but then he shoves THAT out the window for the discs again ig!!! but then it's about l’manburg again? Make it make sense.... pls....

Here's smth that really irks me about Tommy's character, and is kind of weird but give me a second to explain: Tommy has never actually permanently lost much of anything on the server. Every punishment he's ever received he's tried to find some way around. And like... I'm not expecting him to be HAPPY to face the consequences of his actions but seeing him constantly have his cake and eat it too is very irritating, especially when there are characters who DO have to deal with actual permanent sacrifices. The whole thing with the disks. where he WILLINGLY OFFERED THEM UP AND GAVE THEM AWAY THEN SPENT FOREVER TRYING TO STEAL THEM BACK WHILE CLAIMING DREAM STOLE THEM FROM HIM, is the biggest example of this, but it's generally his characters way of dealing with things. He's very backhanded and conniving, constantly calling himself "big man" except for when he wants things from people and he plays up the "iM a MiNoR" card to try and get them to give him things or feel bad. He's not just some sweet innocent kid like people paint him, he knows damn well he's messed up and while he SAYS he feels bad about it, he has never once really shown, with his ACTIONS, regret for what he's done except for the stuff with c!Sapnap, which could it could be argued he did because he thought it would help get c!Sapnap on his side to fight Dream and he knew c!Sapnap was a skilled warrior and could possibly be persuaded to fight with dream.

c!Tommy is in NO way some sweet innocent child, he knows what he's doing. He KNEW l'manburg was a drug empire, and wanted to turn his hotel into the same He was FULLY prepared to just murder c!Schlatt for legally winning an election that he KNEW was rigged AND INTENDED TO HELP RIG HE LITERALLY TEAMED UP WITH c!TECHNOBLADE KNOWING THAT HE INTENDED TO BLOW UP L'MANBURG AND ONLY LEFT WHEN HE REALIZED IT WASN'T GOING TO ACTUALLY HELP HIM--

The line of c!Wilbur saying "Tommy, are we the bad guys?" wasn't him mentally going batshit it was him realizing that the entire time they've been doing terrible things. c!Wilbur was literally ALWAYS Vilbur but the time people CALL Vilbur is when c!Will himself realized he was a villain.

[birlcholtz]

Fic Questions

tagged by @the-lincyclopedia thank you!! (fun game: watch my writing get progressively less formal as the post continues. by the end it’s like what is capitalization)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

77!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

434,378 as of this week but it does go up quite regularly

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Okay so in terms of what’s on my AO3, I have Check Please, All For the Game, Sharp Zero, HP, and Miraculous Ladybug. I also have The Forbidden LOTR and PJO Fanfiction (as in, I’ve written it, but it’s never seeing the light of day)

(technically there is a PJO fic out there that has seen the light of day but I orphaned it because I was tired of getting comments asking about when it would be updated)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

and then i met you (and the whole world changed)

for the better

Knew It Was You

come home (to you, to us)

sin bin schematics

All of these are Check Please and all of them except Knew It Was You are part of my Zimbits Airport AU!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! It’s actually a very recent thing that I’ve started not responding to literally every single comment. Mainly I respond because I love talking about my writing so I am going to seize that opportunity when it comes up

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Oh, DEFINITELY Happy Birthday (HP). Check out that MCD tag ahah. (I say HP but what I really mean is that I write fic about Regulus Black. The Regulus Black-centric tag is my home in the HP fandom)

fun fact: this is a very short fic that I wrote when I was 15 and basically forgot about until recently, and then I reread it recently and went holy shit?? I pulled NO punches????

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the wildest one you’ve written?

Not a ton? I think a lot of the fandoms I write for don’t really mesh that well. That being said, the aforementioned orphaned PJO fic is actually a PJO/ML crossover, so there’s that

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Nope! Sometimes I get comments that are just.... really confusing? And a more common thing is that in my AFTG fic I’ll get comments from people who are so focused on Andreil (or the most common ships in general) to the point that like. they miss the point of what I actually wrote. Those are annoying but they’re not hate, they’re very enthusiastic, they’re just... enthusiastic about a story I’m not writing? So it’s a bit frustrating.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

No sjflskgjhgf I struggle enough to write kissing, I think if I ever tried to write smut my brain would just shut down. I’ve managed some fade-to-blacks (which are mostly in WIPs that haven’t been posted) but they rely HEAVILY on the powers of implication

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of!

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, although I have occasionally made a brief go of it, not to post, more as an exercise for myself in a language that I’m learning. Anyway I never finish them so I’m gonna say no

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not really? I’ve definitely group brainstormed fics and then written them (the best example of this being Q&A (AFTG), which was the product of a truly off-the-walls group chat), but I tend to do all the actual writing myself. I think the way I write would drive a co-writer up the wall since it’s very disorganized and I don’t write stuff down because ~I know what’s gonna happen I don’t need notes~ and it would infuriate me if I was co-writing with me lmao, so I won’t inflict that on someone else

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I regularly move through ships I’m SUPER focused on, like it’s kind of a rotation. I will forever and always ship Percabeth though.

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Okay so if you follow me at @birlwrites you may know this already, but i have this ‘warmups’ document that is just like, random ideas i get that i don’t necessarily want to finish but i just want to try out for a bit? and i have a rule that once a ‘warmup’ is more than 10 pages long (so 11+) then it has to be moved to its own document, just to make scrolling through the warmups doc easier. but usually, a warmup only passes 10 pages when i’m INTO it. so i have a bazillion wips i will probably never finish. i complain about this a lot. i have so many wips. i don’t need more.

here’s one: it’s titled ‘interrobang doesn’t know they’re dating’, it’s basically a full outline for a chowder/tango fic and it would be SO cool if i could ever like. get around to writing it. but i am constantly swamped with writing projects, so it’s probably not gonna happen. if anyone’s interested in adopting it though i’d be down for that!! i think it’s a fun idea i just almost def won’t write it myself

15. What are your writing strengths?

SNAPPY DIALOGUE AND SNARKY INTERNAL MONOLOGUE. my writing is COMEDIC, 90% of my ideas are based on a funny snippet that popped into my head, a lot of my worldbuilding is based on ‘hey you know what would be hilarious’ (whenever i explain how larai selects a chosen one in the rainfall universe i start laughing, which is a STARK contrast to how it plays out on the page), i love writing funny stuff!!

also i think my writing sounds nice, a lot of the time i pick words/syntax based on sound and flow so there’s that too. and i have lots of ideas! i don’t struggle much with writer’s block because a) i have a lot of strategies to deal with it and b) i have a lot of ideas to help get around it/work with it

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

PHYSICAL INTIMACY LMAO, sometimes in my end notes on shippy fics you can see me complaining ‘it took me literally 4 hours to write that very brief kiss’. also sometimes the humor in my writing gets in the way a bit, i have to very consciously put it away so characters can actually have serious, genuine emotions. also i don’t like outlining and i tend not to get betas for fanfiction so like..... i do my best continuity-wise but having really tightly plotted stories is just not my focus lol. (and i do put more effort into that for original stuff, it’s just fic where i kind of go wild)

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

If the reader’s supposed to know what it means, then writing it in another language is iffy for me. (stuff like terms of endearment which come up a lot in fic are fine imo, you can just put a note in to translate them and your reader will prob remember)

If the pov character isn’t supposed to understand it, and it doesn’t matter if the reader understands it, then ig it’s fine? but unless you already speak the other language (and i am NOT confident in my ability to translate english into literally any other language), then i think it’s way easier to just note that a character’s speaking x language and provide tone indicators, body language cues, etc. so the reader understands as much as the pov character.

That being said there are def times when it’s used super effectively--the dialogue in spanish in cemetery boys comes to mind! that’s not fanfic but it’s still creative writing so w/e

so i guess it comes down to: does actually writing out the dialogue in the other language serve a purpose? if it doesn’t, then you’re filling up the screen with words your reader isn’t likely to understand, which i try to avoid doing

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

so the first fandom i actually *wrote* for was PJO, but i distinctly remember creating warrior cats OCs when i was little. i never actually did anything w them but i had them and my favorite was a riverclan warrior named shellstream i remember this VIVIDLY

19. What’s your favorite fic you’ve ever written?

oh boy. okay so this is hard because i feel like i’m continuously improving as a writer. like in the sense that my writing is getting closer and closer to really matching my own taste? my favorites tend to always be my current projects as a result. and i do really love set those ghosts alight (HP) but it feels a little like cheating to say a fic i haven’t even finished writing yet. even though it’s def not cheating, that’s just the direction my brain is taking it.

i’m gonna say and then what? (OMGCP) because i’m super proud of the prose (especially ch 2 aka the first actual prose chapter), survived by (HP) for SUCCESSFULLY WRITING AN EMOTION and making readers cry :), and Q&A (AFTG) because i’m literally the one who wrote it and yet it still makes me wheeze. those are all fics i reread occasionally, because i’m big enough to admit i enjoy rereading my old stuff! (just like. to a point. some of my old stuff i can’t look at anymore because all the mistakes stick out to me like they have spotlights shining directly on them)

this was fun!! i’m gonna do an open tag because i just started my fall semester and brain tired. i know sometimes people see open tags and assume the op didn’t really mean it but I MEAN IT, PLEASE DO THIS AND TAG ME!!!!! YES YOU READING THIS

[thedetectivessay]

Highlights from the Fan Meeting

(took longer than planned. sorry..)

So, there were definitely A LOT of people watching during the event. At one point, it reached 26k viewers - but it could have been higher than that. They were also broadcasting through VLive so there were more. 

There was an earlier interview thing that was reposted later on on Instagram. I’m not sure if that was something exclusive to SK viewers or if it really was just a private interview (saw a news outlet’s watermark somewhere; Yonhap News’, I think). 

Either way, in that interview, Cho PD participated. He wasn’t there for the international fan meet, though.

Anyway, here are the highlights in a (mostly) chronological order:

• During the opening, the cast were introduced. Jaesuk or the MC did mention straight off the bat that this will be the final season. 

• Sejeong roasted Kwangsoo because of his hair 😂 It’s currently very long because he and Sehun had been filming for Pirates 2; Sehun’s hair was long-ish as well. But yeah - he got the most teasing because his hair is as long as Sejeong’s now lol

•  Okay, I gotta mention this: Jongmin was DRESSED TO THE T. He looked so nice, but it was so cute! He was just so determined to impress the international fans present. It just showed how much he cared about us and about how we felt about him. 

So yes: if you haven’t yet, give Jongmin some love. 

He was also asked at one point who he felt the closest to among the cast members, and y’all - he hesitated 😭😭 It was obvious he wanted to say he felt the closest to Sejeong, but he got scared because he thought the fans who were there might get mad at him 😭

But Sejeong, being the sweetheart that she is, kept encouraging him to pick her anyway by throwing hearts at him 🥰

Y’all, what are we gonna do once this show is over? This brOTP is the best when it came to roasting people! And they act like fr siblings 😭😭

• On the same question, after Jongmin did pick Sejeong, Kwangsoo made a remark, saying that he thought Jongmin was going to choose him. He looked hurt 😂

Side note: are we finally getting more Jongmin and Kwangsoo scenes this season?? 😃

• Not that long after, they played a game. Three of the cast members were chosen prior to the meet to draw a picture summarizing an episode. The rest had to guess where it was from. 

Kwangsoo was the first to go, and his clue - drawn nicely - pointed to S1EP5, The Last Vampire. Jaesuk was the first one to solve it, mentioning that it was the episode Park Hae-jin was in.

Seunggi was next, and it took the cast a while to figure out which episode it is. Can’t remember who solved it or if Seunggi just gave them the answer, but it was depicting one of the final scenes in S2EP10, The Flower of Death. It was that part where they were in Flower Killer’s hideout, when he finally told them who he really was while standing over Minjae. 

Kwangsoo afterwards said he was surprised by how terrible(?) Seunggi’s drawing skills were. Seunggi just laughed. 

Sejeong was next. She drew the detective team (beautifully, btw), and underneath the picture were the words versus + seven silhouettes with question marks on their faces. 

Kwangsoo praised Sejeong for her great drawing skills, and the cast agreed. 

The cast eventually figured out which episode, but they were hesitant to really speak of it.

It was then revealed that it’s an episode/case where the detective team faces off with a copycat team. We will see this and find out who the copycat seven are in S3. 

• Afterwards, they did this thing where a roulette chooses one of the members, the MC reads the messages written to them by fellow cast members, and they guess who they think it’s from. 

I’ll probably make another post later for this if you guys want since I can’t remember everything that was said, but basically...

> Jaesuk received messages from Sehun and Seunggi. Can’t remember what Seunggi said, but Sehun pretty much just thanked Jaesuk for teaching him 10% of what he needed to know about variety (he said the other 90% he learned himself lol) 

> Seunggi received messages from Sehun and Minyoung.

> Kwangsoo received messages from Jaesuk and Sejeong. Jaesuk said in his message that he highly valued him and Jongmin - and he asked them to stay with him forever (😭)

Meanwhile, Sejeong said that she’s thankful and sorry to Kwangsoo. When asked what she was sorry about, she said it was because she knew there were moments when it needed to be funny, and Kwangsoo would make a fool of himself to make that happen. 

(Side note: she interacted a lot with Kwangsoo this fan meet, too, so I have hope that I will also get the Kwangsoo and Sejeong brOTP scenes I’ve been asking for 🙌🏼)

> Minyoung received messages from Jaesuk and Jongmin.

> Jongmin received messages from Kwangsoo and Sejeong (my other brOT3 😭❤️)

> Sehun received messages from Jongmin and Minyoung. Jongmin said in his message that he was sorry to Sehun because he didn’t (couldn’t?) take care of him better. 

> Sejeong received messages from Jaesuk and Minyoung. Minyoung asked somewhere in her message for them to have a drink together some time, while Jaesuk asked Sejeong if she could help Kwangsoo land a role in her current drama 😂

Kwangsoo then revealed that Jaesuk always does that: whenever he meets with his friends and other celebrities, he always asks them to cast Kwangsoo in their drama or movie. The cast laughed. 

Seunggi then mentioned afterwards that he’s currently working on a new drama or movie (not sure which one), and he offered Kwangsoo the role of a mouse lol

• That was then followed by the Thank You messages from the fans. Some of you may be aware of this, but about a week and a half ago, on IG, the Busted Netflix official account asked fans to submit a 10 second video of themselves saying “Thank you, Team Busted!” in their native language. 

It was so cute, you guys! It just showed how much the cast and crew were loved by many all over the world. 

Although: there was one fan from Sweden or Norway who had a whole PROJECT D MARK HANGING ON HIS WALL. THE SAME ONE HANGING OUTSIDE THE MAZE IN C’S LAIR IN THE SERIES PREMIERE.

Where did he get that?? I want one, I’m so jealous!! ☹️

•  The fan meeting closed with messages from the cast. Most of them seemed so tired at this point, but Jaesuk proved to be the best leader the cast/team could ask for even in the end. 

I mentioned this on the first update, but he said he felt sad that the series was coming to an end especially since the cast had such great chemistry. It was heartwarming to hear because it personally gave me a sense of closure. 

To hear a cast member address the feelings a number of us feel is comforting, you know?

• The fan meet ended with bouquets of flowers (non-threatening kind 😏😉) and gift bags for the cast! They were all so pleasantly surprised, and it was so cute. 

Netflix seemed to be aware that the awards season just finished in SK, so they gave each of the members their own trophies bearing personalized awards! It was a weighty trophy, too; the cast commented on it.

I don’t know what the other members received, but Sejeong, I think, got the Bright Future Award. 

Myuk PD later posted on his IG pictures of this big gift bag that Netflix apparently gave him and the other PDs. One of the gifts they received contained a pair of wine glasses with an electric bottle opener in the middle. It was so classy and nice.

Bro - no one can say that Netflix didn’t love the detective team and the creators of the show. They threw all kind of love and attention on them, and they didn’t skimp on the gifts and ads either. 

There are other points from that earlier interview I was talking about, but I’ll put that on a separate post if you’re interested :) 

Detective Fam! There’s literally only two days before the final season drops! For those of you who live on the Eastern hemisphere, it’s just one day and some change! 

Season 3!! Are you guys excited??!

[drop-the-curtain-123]

Hello!! Hope this isn’t bothering you, but might you have any more spastic Chess headcanon content? (I love the concept, it’s canon now)

wok keep in mind i’m no @i-don-t-even-care​ nor @anythingbutwallflower​ so bear with my non expertise in those listings. plus i havent even watched the show in a whole, but whatever lol. its projection a whole much lot, i’m actually scared of oversharing online but oh well-

was born with it

was born quite early actually, at like, 6, 6.5 months of pregnancy

nobody really knows why. she used to joke about how she was actually awaited and had to go save this trashy world early on

was in a “baby incubator” as she calls it for a bit after birth.

it touches her right side, so she’s left-handed. like, heavily. she can hold things with her right hand, but it's not that comfortable, so the right arm is mostly left on its own, sometimes on dinosaur-hand mode

she moves a lot of things with her trunk, like pushing a book etc instead of using her arms

her hands sometimes throw things randomly too

like just. stop working

is actually really muscular on her arms because she dragged herself with it when she was young, since, yeah, she walked later than others

she has a limp, always had. her right side, again, is weaker, from the eye to the feet, and her leg is actually a bit shorter. her right calf is notably thin and all

she wanted to be a sports medical person in canon, right? go off with it, but make it for the paralympic people

has chronic pain in the legs since puberty, something along those lines

like, all the times, feeling like muscular exhaustion/stabbing

which is why she relied on... the things she took. because really, nothing can make it go away

the leg pain? maybe painkillerS can, but the numbness and overweightness feeling on it? impossible.

shes quite a exhausted a lot

her being disabled also adds a meaning/layer on about what happened to her, happened to her

she sits whenever she can because standing up?? for no reason?? are y’all crazy?

also she wears casual, lose clothing because thights things can be annoying or trigger the tension of the already tensed up muscles

pratical hairstyles too

kate does it soemtimes, or brush her hair if cheche is out of spoons

sometimes her leg shake like a washing machine and she thinks it’s funny

kate think it’s not

IDK if chess being disabled changes anything to their dynamic

maybe kate carried chess backpack sometimes

she actually joined cheer out of spite

just because kate joked about “oh id be worse than you even, and lost without you even” i guess

she stuck out with it cause it gave her scheduled stuff to do and conforted her in her horrendous internalized “need to fit with the ableds” ableism to prove herself she can

she had kinesytherapy too but thats another topic. fyi it’s once a week

now on non-disability related stuff solely but i wanted to add it on

chess and mattie friendship?? HELLO??

chess only has one (1) girl cousin and she’s living in like. poland. or portland. she cant always remember. whatever, anyway, it’s far away /j so she gives all of her old hello kitty sunflowers hairclips, hair ties etc to mattie

they watch bad horror movies together and pair all of those dumbasses together randomly

they rank the stupidest effects of cgi or the fakest blood, sometimes with eva, our local skeptic

they do jokes about being the skeptic (eva), the hectic (mattie) and the spastic (chess) in an attic (of whom? i don’t know. maybe reese out of all people have pity of them

they can go skiing together (seriously y’all check out how us spazzers skii. it’s marvelous. google it)

i feel like she’d enjoy hanging out in silence with eva, in a public library, in those lion-seats that are definitely made for kids, theyre all have bad posture but they love it.

they dont actually study there, they just pick up books to rent and actually have a bubble out of schoolwork

one of their moms said it was a neat thing she’s read it on facebook

so they do it to please mrs. wheeler :^)

they cook too. idk what. ijust love the dynamic of mattie, eva, and chess

probably bread

i feel like theyd gift super great crunchy bread to cairo for some reason

ill rb if i add anything ig i wrote it on one setting ily’all, dont hesitate to ask me stuff related! hope you liked it!

[thebigqueer]

My OCs One-Shot - “Just Him”

Summary: just a short glimpse (again) into this weird world im tryna brew up klsflksadfk. features my OCs, Leo and Casey (about to date). Kinda fluffy, ig. idk. just a oneshot no one asked for lakjsflkjfdjd

word count: 861

Note: like i said, no one asked for this, i just felt like posting it. lkajsflkjsdfk idk lmfao. not especially proud of it but god knows how much i adore Casey x Leo. i honestly just wrote this in writing club and idk. for reference: casey’s pronouns are he/him, as are Leo’s. 

We’re gearing up for the battle, down in the training area, no one else around. Not that I can sense, at least. With a quick scan of my powers, the only excess of heat comes from in front of me, to the right. No other sense of warmth except him. 

Casey has no balls. I sigh internally. Why must I always be the one to make the first move? 

I step towards him, or what I believe to be towards him, if my powers are telling me the truth. His daggers slide against each other, making a shling sound, and I just have to feel sorry for the poor sucker who’ll get stabbed with one of those. 

“So,” I say, running my fingers through my curls. A casual smile takes control of my mouth and I turn my head in what I hope is in his direction. Can’t really tell when you’re blind. “Are you ready?”

Casey laughs softly, tiredly, like this is just an annoying project rather than a risk to his life. “What kind of question is that? Am I ever ready?” 

“Are any of us?”

Though I can’t see his expressions, I can almost hear the exhausted and irritated smile on his face when he replies, “Exactly.” He shifts in his seat, rustling his armor and knives. “I just hope I can make it out alive to take my math test tomorrow.” 

The entire idea is absurd. We have to forcibly put our lives out on the line, and yet he’s still worrying about some stupid school stuff. 

Not that I’m much better. I have a club that I missed today, and I’m pretty pissed. 

Maybe it’s not that stupid, though. Maybe we’re both just distracting ourselves with some normal teenager things instead of acknowledging the fact that there’s a chance we might die. 

But that chance is there every battle. Every time we encounter the enemy. So maybe worrying about our little math tests or our English essays or our Biology labs are our one chance at stability. Maybe that’s why we’re so worried about them, despite the fact they stress us out. 

They’re our only chance to feel like we belong in this world, that we’re like everyone else when that’s so far from the truth.

I take a seat by him, praying on all the gods that I will not cut my butt on one of his knives. The gods seem to hear me because I do not immediately jump away, cursing, with blood pouring out of my pants. 

I nudge him with my shoulder, shifting a little closer to him. Even though I’m not Lexi - I don’t have fire powers like she does - I can still feel the increase in heat with my ice powers. I smile at the fact that Casey’s face suddenly bursts in heat. 

“Well, maybe a math test isn’t the only reason you should stay alive.” Tilting my head towards him, I smile in the most innocent way I can. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

Reaching for his fingers, nudging his foot with mine, I mutter, “Casey, I just know you’re not oblivious.” Turning back to him, my smile brightens itself.

Casey lowers his voice and, by the proximity, I can tell he’s tilted his own head towards mine. “Maybe I am.” 

I purse my lips, leaning my head to the side as if scrutinizing him, though I can’t see shit. 

Being blind is still fairly new to me. There are times when I really wish I could see, and this is definitely one of those moments. I would literally kill to get even a small glimpse of Casey again, his blond hair and his golden skin and his reserved, shy smile. 

Just him. 

“Can I kiss you?” I ask. 

That seems to take him by surprise, but his voice isn’t hesitant when he replies: “Yes.” 

I bring my lips to his, and my lips immediately spark with electricity. I’m not a Whisperer like Casey is, but somehow I can read his thoughts: OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD I’M KISSING HIM I’M KISSING HIM I’M KISSING HIM. 

I smile. I ask him, beckoning him with my thoughts, Is there a thing with your powers where when you get too excited you start accidentally leaking all your most deepest and embarrassing secrets out to everyone around you?

He stops kissing me and pulls away, and the original excitement turns into sudden shame and embarrassment. OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING. 

I laugh. “Seems like you were excited to kiss me.” I pull away from him and pick myself up, grinning. “Anyway, here’s my proposal: come back out alive, and maybe we’ll go out. On a date.” I shrug. “Maybe I can help you study for that math test.” 

Before I can get an answer from him, I turn around and start walking towards the exit. “I can guarantee you, though, there won’t be much studying.”

Casey scoffs, but I don’t even need to use my powers to know that he’s blushing. “Leo, you can be so unbelievably annoying sometimes.” 

“Not my fault you’re attracted to dumbasses.”

[butterbeeryuta]

yoonoh as your boyfriend

a/n: alrighHHt so this was requested a loooong time ago, and i just keep forgetting to do this, BUT HERE it is. i’m so so so sorry to the person who requested this, you’ve waited for such a long time. 

okay so let’s talk about how the two of you met shall we

so you worked as a designer for stationeries, and it was your first day at work

and ofc you were late

so there you were, running from the bus stop to the work place

may god bless your laptop

you had no food, you woke up late, you weren’t sure if your clothes were appropriate for work, and you also weren’t sure if you had everything you needed

great start sis

you were 15 minutes late, so you didn’t care about anything else. you HAD to get to your table so you nyOOooonGEd to the elevator, and pressed the button to your floor

‘hey can you wait up please?’ 

but you were late, so you didn’t care

‘sorry, but i’m really late right now. IM SORRY.’

once the elevator door closed, you sighed to yourself, thinking of ways to apologise to whoever you have to say sorry to

so yeah, you got out, got to your assigned desk as you placed all of your stuff

‘Ms./Mr. L/N’

Oh shit

hold on, that voice was familiar wasn’t it

you looked up at the person, and it happened to someHoW be that buy that asked you to wait for him to enter the elevator

And you just happen to notice, he was pretty

REALLY pretty

And tall

And now that you think about it, his voice is pretty too

tf is he working here for 

‘Oh! You! Oh I’m very sorry I didn’t wait for you, listen I was late and I didn’t want the manager to be too mad cause it’s my first day and all, but please don’t tell himー'

‘Well you sort of straight up told me you were late so I guess I can’t do much about this I already know, but hey I’m not made. But I must say, you should’ve waited for a bit, you were already late anyway, right Ms./Mr. L/N?’ 

Oh my god

Oh my fucking god

DID YOU JUST CALL YOUR BOSS ‘Oh! You!’

SKJSJKDJNDOWENOIN

you wanted to die, you wanted the world to swallow you alive, THIS IS NOT OKAY ON YOUR FIRST DAY

‘I-I... Okay, please don’t fire me’

....

.....

............

you know jaehyun’s deep and loud laugh?

yeah he did that

and you were confused af

‘God no I won’t fire you, it’s not everyday I get entertained this much by me employee. Anyway, I came here to introduce you to the rest of the team, and I’ll be giving you your first project. So here’s your iPad in which you’ll be designing things on, and this is your ID card for identification purposes, as well as discounts for food and stationery in...’

whichever god(ess) was on your side that day, you thanked him or her internally for saving your ass

5 MONTHS LATER 

so you had a sales-pitch meeting with the board, including your boss, jung yoonoh, but he also likes to be called jaehyun

and if it wasn’t clear with your character, you were a mess

you were very nervous since you were initiating your idea of including more planners/diaries that with time slots and designs that included things from different subject areas like chemistry, biology, business management, psychology, and more. you just wanted something students can use effectively for their study routines, especially if it relates to their area of study.

so yes, a lot of people and you talking? yeah only wizards can do that in ur opinion

but despite your nervousness, you still managed to somewhat explain your ideas with a few slips here and there until you made eye contact with your boss

he was smiling at you

his eyes were paying a lot of attention to you

and for some reason, you felt really calm and you continued to give your presentation in a somewhat smooth manner

once you said your thank yous, thankfully, they clapped for you whereas jaehyun continued to clap  with that award-winning smile

you felt weird, but it was a good type of weird. weird in a sense that your tummy felt a lot of tingles

and you were judging yourself for it. you weren’t sure why you were feeling like this considering that you’ve seen your boss smile on so many different occasions 

once people began to leave the room, you started packing up your stuff, you know, the cleaning part

but ofc, jaehyun didn’t leave at all

‘good job today, you did really well’

and the weird feeling just HAD to return

all you could do was smile and softly laugh, unsure of how to exactly respond to compliments, and I honestly do NoT blame you for that

‘it’s not much really, but thank you Mr. Jungー'

‘call me jaehyun, or yoonoh if you’d like’

what?

wHat?

NaNi????

‘hm?’

you mentally slapped yourself for saying that out loud to him, he’s your fucking boss get you shit together you awkward mess

‘my name? you can call me that you know?’ he says, unsure himself if he was asking a question about his own identity or not

so you just shook your head a little, trying to tell your tall and gorgeous boss that he didn’t have to do that

‘no no no, it’s fine. you’re my boss, I should be calling you Mr. Jung’ because that is what employees have to do

he sighed, slowly making his way over you

and because you just had to be you, you sort of, panic? thinking that you’ll get fired for displeasing him. basically back to day 1 of the two of you meeting.

will you get fired? will he place you in another department with another team manager? will be stop you from your project? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

chill no he just gonna confess he likes you 

he made his way, lowering himself down to your height until your eyes met

‘okay, but what if i ask you out for dinner or something, will you then call me by my first name?’

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAAH

did he? does her srsly think you’re that great of a person to be dated?

‘uhhh what? i’m sorry but, you can’t be serious right?’ he HAS to be joking

though a part of you wishes he really does like you because mcfuck you like him and you found out today when your tummy did shit from juSt a smile

he instead laughs at you, and pulls you in for a soft and sweet kiss

well i guess he likes you sjdksdjksdjksjd

the moment the two of you pulled away, he couldn’t help but laugh at your flushed state

you were REd. your boss, your tall gorgeous kind boss just kissed and said he likes you. you are living the actual y/n dream. 

‘okay wow so you weren’t joking’

*face palm*, you’re a legit mess sweetie

but ig that’s what jaehyun likes about you. you say things on your mind, and you’re intelligent and determined to do your best. 

after that day, jaehyun and you got together, and let me just say, he’s the best boyfriend ever, but he can be such an ass from time to time

whenever you come in for work there’s a cup of hot coffee there for you along with a sticky note on it, and it’s cute

then the sticky note says ‘you’re late again’

now he’s an ass

then dinner dates! my god, he likes fancy ass places so much, and you feel bad cause he never lets you pay??? idk ya’ll be going to some hyatt hotel level restaurants and he casually pays for your dinner like that????

and whenever you try to say smth against it, he goes like ‘no no you can pay me back with a kiss, it’s alright’

and i swear he deliberately does it cause you blush madly and stutter, he likes it so much cause he finds you so adorable

ig that hardest thing jaehyun has to deal with is that since he’s your boss, he sometimes has to turn your ideas down and makes you redo things despite how hard you worked

and you do get hurt when he does, and though you know he’s saying that because it’s his job, you sometimes don’t talk to him for a bit cause again, it’s hurtful

and jaehyun does feel bad, but he also knows that it’s job to do so

but, you eventually come to your senses and apologise to him for your behaviour, whereas he holds you against his chest and kisses your temple, telling you it’s alright and that he’ll try to guide you better

have i talked about cuddling?

A BIG ASS TEDDY BEAR

he isn’t really a fan of pda, but once the two of you are together, he loves attacking you with cuddles and soft kisses

and though sometimes you do want your personal space, his presence is just warm and comfy. you have to like him. 

‘you know i’m so lucky to have you’ he whispers against your ear

‘i know, and i’m glad you’re mine too’

[lumiolivier]

Life Update of 2020 (Don’t Worry.  Just the Good-Good)

It’s been a while since we last spoke, huh, Tumblr?  I don’t pay you nearly as much attention as what I should, but I’m scattered all over cyberspace.  I show up in the most unexpected places.  But what the alternate title of this is:

Lumi’s Post of Shameless Self Promotion (Because What Else is a Blog Good For?)

So, what have I been up to, you may be asking yourself?  Or maybe you’re not asking that question and you’re telling me to fuck off.  Well, if that’s the case, then fuck you, too.  So, hail Satan and have a lovely afternoon madam.

But if you are curious, here we are.  Let’s do this in sections.  That way, if you could give two shits less about something else I do, then, you can skip to the good bits, yeah? Or whatever it is you follow me for, K? Let’s get into it then.

1.)  Fan Fiction:

So, in my last master post update, I hadn’t started posting Castlevania yet.  It just recently came to an end last week, so...Brief synopsis and link in three...two...one!

Last of the Belmonts

Eden had lost her mother. The only family she thought she'd ever have. Her father couldn't be farther at the bottom of the barrel in her eyes. Her mother would be the only one who would accept her dhampir nature. That is until she finally starts to explore the other half of her blood, her vampiric half, courtesy of a certain girl gang of full-blooded vampires. However, despite that, she's still half human. Which half will rule her head and her heart?

Just a heads up.  If you do read Last of the Belmonts (which I highly recommend.  I loved this story so much and I’m so sad to see it go.), there are slight mentions of rape, but they’re far and few in between.  Eden, the MC, is a dhampir.  And for those who don’t know, dhampirs are a human/vampire hybrid.  She wasn’t one of the lucky ones who came into this world by consensual means.  Most of them aren’t.  But before you ask, NO.  SHE IS NOT DRACULA’S DAUGHTER.  We find out just who she is throughout the story.  But it’s got a little bit of everything in it.  It’s got Trevor and Alucard sassing each other.  It’s got Sypha trying to mediate between them.  It’s got a MC that’s got a chip on her shoulder.  I like to call it an alternative season three.  Like, the story opens up in Braila after Carmilla’s raid, so...I’m not going to give too much for spoilers here.  Just...Read the damn thing if you’re that curious.  And I’ve been getting asked about a sequel, but I’m not quite sold on it yet.  

But Castlevania isn’t the only fandom I’ve dipped my toe in as far as fic goes.  Because...It’s been three years since I last wrote for Death Note and I got a friendly reminder of how big of Death Note trash I was when I fell down a fanart rabbit hole one night and thought, I need to jump back into writing Death Note fic.  It’s that kind of a year.  What the hell?  Why not?  And because I was feeling particularly thirsty, I decided I’d write my first Lawlight fic.  Which...Again, same as I did for Last of the Belmonts, synopsis and link!  BAM!

The Sweet Taste of Silver

Email after email...It only made Light sicker to look at them. Final notice. Past due. Expulsion threats. He knew going to one of the best schools in the country would be pricey, but that's what his scholarships were for, right? At least until they start running out. At least he'll have his internship...And his new employer.

Yeah.  It’s what you think.  It’s a sugar baby AU.  We all know Light’s a sugar baby waiting to happen and it’s an underappreciated AU on Ao3, so I figured I’d add to the rich tapestry it is.  But this is still ongoing.  It gets updates every Tuesday.  This story has been my new lightning in a bottle.  It’s gotten a lot of traction on Ao3 and you are definitely more than welcome to it.  I never thought I’d get so into writing angsty gays like I did with L and Light, but holy hell.  It’s so much fun...Why did no one tell me this would be fun?  I don’t know why I needed a sugar baby Death Note fic, but dammit, here we are.

Amongst all that mess, I’ve posted a SHIT TON of Mystic Messenger oneshots (even got my first commission because of those oneshots!).  They’re all on Ao3.  There’s probably 11 or 12 of them, so I’m not going to post the whole list here.  Just go to my Ao3 account.  You’ll see them there.  But since we’re on the subject of MysMes fics I’ve written over the years, I started doing a rewrite of Man’s Best Intern, too!  I mean, the story premise is still the same, but it’s had some tweaks here and there.  And that’s damn near catching up to the Sweet Taste of Silver.  My babies are all growing up so fast.  I’m so proud of them...But the Man’s Best Intern rewrite is going up on Ao3 every Wednesday and Friday.

And the last fic I’m going to throw out here is For the Family.  Now, for those of you who remember, last year, I posted a story called Switch about a little girl that grew up in New York mafia falling in love with a sweet, yet salty yakuza boy and getting tangled up with the Ouran Host Club.  Well, it got a sequel.  Again.  Link and synopsis, ho!

For the Family

One year. That's all it took for Rei's heart to find home in another city. But it wasn't necessarily the city that captured her heart. it was the cute yakuza boy that bumped into her in the hallway. And thought she was a dude. Anyone else would've been afraid of someone with that kind of power...but not everyone had that same power. Now that another summer has passed, Rei and Ritsu were ready to go back to Ouran to take on their mutual frenemies: The Ouran Host Club

I couldn’t stay away from them for long.  They were too cute.  I loved Rei and Ritsu’s dynamic and they’ve only gotten worse.  At the time I’m posting this, For the Family is ongoing, too.  It goes up on Thursdays and I love this one so much.  It’s been a roller coaster already and it hasn’t even gotten to the middle bit yet.  This coming week’s chapter may or may not be a shit show.

I know I said that I’d be done with my fan fiction bullshit after my pitch of For the Family, but I also kind of have something cooking up.  I’ve been working on a project that’s been completely handwritten for Hetalia that includes both the 1p! and 2p! characters, centered around an OC.  I’ve been debating on whether or not to post that one online.  Because it’s been mostly me writing it for me to unwind at night.  It’s what I’ve spent my last half hour of my day working on and it’s put me in such a good place.  Which is weird because the MC spends a lot of time with 2p!France and he’s kind of an asshole. I don’t know.  I’ll think about it.

2.)  New Schedule Changes?  Instagram?  Whaaaat?

I know.  That sounds like it still pertains to my fan fiction here.  It does not!  On my Instagram for the last few weeks, I’ve been doing livestreams on Friday nights.  It’s mostly just me sitting down and bullshitting with a camera, but it’s been some great fun!  For the first one, I made curry.  For the second one, I was working on a bullet journal spread.  They’re all just very chill livestreams with a little hint of chaotic.  My last post before this one?  That was from last week’s stream when we were talking about different CMV projects I’d love to make, but I don’t have the bodies to make them.  As mellow as they are, they’re also a lot of fun.  So, if you’re looking for something to do with your Friday night and feel like hanging out with me, come hang out with me.  My IG handle is LumiOlivier.  You’re more than welcome to come sit and hang out.  If my streams keep going they way they’ve been, maybe I’ll start doing more with them.  Maybe I’ll bring them to YouTube.  Maybe I’ll do something silly like do them more than once a week.  

But that’s pretty much it.  I’ve been, like most of you, shut up in my house for the last six months as much as possible.  This year might be shit, but there’s been some pretty neat shit happening.  And hopefully, it’ll be more of an upswing for the rest of it.  So, I’m going to go because I have a chapter I need to do for Wednesday tonight and an outline to do.  K, love you, bye! 

[sweetsmellosuccess]

TIFF 2020: Last Call

Films: 3 Best Film of the Day(s): Another Round

I Am Greta: A 15-year-old girl sits alone in front of the Swedish Parliament in Stockholm with a simple hand-painted sign on a flat piece of wood that says “Skolstrejk For Klimatet” (School Strike for Climate”). A year later, that same girl, now 16, speaks before the general assembly of the UN in New York, and has helped rally millions to the cause of significant climate reform. In between those two poles lies the majority of Nathan Grossman’s fascinating documentary about young Greta Thunberg, and the movement she helped create of young people taking action for their own future. A slightly withdrawn kid with what she calls “a touch” of Asperger’s, Greta’s success, as unexpected and unprepared for as it was, lies partially in the very idea she conveys to another group of world leaders in Europe: “All you care about is popularity,” she growls at them, “I don’t care to be popular.” Because of her lack of personal ego in the process  —  else, you can imagine how going from having a small personal protest to meetings with the UN Attorney General and President of France within a few months; or better yet, in modern teen terms, to being largely ostracized from your school, where other kids “never invited” you to parties or gatherings, to having 10.6 million followers on IG, and the attention of many millions more, might swell your head and put you out of touch with yourself. For Greta, it’s a simple equation: She sees the problem (such that she was so depressed at first she sat out a year of school, and only spoke with her immediate family), and sees what needs to be done, no matter the personal cost. This isn’t to say she’s okay with it: “I miss having a regular life, with routines,” she sighs into her iPhone journal, while sailing across the Atlantic in a small watercraft to attend the UN meeting. “It is such a responsibility. I don’t want to have to do this.” A lament she turns into outrage when she actually does speak in New York, to the assemblage of world leaders: “You’re failing us!” she exhorts, “How dare you?” and ends with a sober warning to those who seek to dismiss her: “The eyes of all future generations are on you.” Naturally, for her effort, she takes potshots from condescending old men (Putin, Trump, Fox News Blowhards, et al.), some of whom trying to make things entirely personal (pundit Michael Knowles sniffed she was “a mentally ill Swedish child,” a statement Fox later apologized for), but none of it seems to matter to her. As before, she uses her “laser focus” on the matter at hand, not interested in rising to the bait of personal conflicts. The film takes us from her first days as a lone but emphatic voice to the de facto leader of a movement now millions strong, though it’s pretty clear in Greta’s mind, the only thing that ultimately matters is what these leaders are actually going to do about the climate catastrophe. At one UN gathering in Europe, she delivers her impassioned speech, only to have to sit and listen to an elderly German politician respond by trying to point out all the “good” they have done. With a look of tired disdain on her face, she pulls off the headphones translating his empty words into English, and sets them down in front of her.

Spring Blossom: Suzanne (Suzanne Lindon), the 16-year-old Parisian heroine in writer/director Lindon’s feature debut, prefers a drink of lemonade and grenadine, the purplish color of which is not-quite red, and not-quite pink. It’s in-between colors you could say, as she is herself, caught between the stifling boredom she feels at her high school with kids her own age, and the more exciting, but scary, possibilities of adulthood personified by Raphael (Arnaud Valois), an actor performing in a local, modernized production concerning Erastes  —  in ancient Greece, an adult in a romance with a child. Raphael, also bored and tired of the production he’s featured in, takes note of Suzanne’s apparent besottlement (in one of the better small details, she watches him eating a breakfast of baguette and strawberry jam at a cafe and requests the same from her mother the next morning), and before long they are a kind of couple, though, we are to understand, not necessarily fully consummated (it’s purposefully left ambiguous). Surprisingly, rather than duck into the well-covered territory of a young innocent ravaged by the rigors of adult love, Suzanne, a prepossessing young woman with a considerable sense of herself, senses both the danger, and her unreadiness, and herself pulls away, even though, as she says flatly “I love him and he loves me” (Raphael, ever gallant, doesn’t challenge her on this, and accepts her feelings). With her elongated neck and slightly crooked teeth, Lindon at first doesn’t appear fully suitable to the character that the script calls for, but soon it becomes apparent how well she precisely embodies the sense of between-worlds. The tone of the project is a marvel, allowing natural realism to intersect with more fanciful adornment  —  the scene when the couple have their first breakfast date, as Raphael puts his headphones on Suzanne so she can hear the genuinely beautiful opera that opens his show, leading them to perform a complex, sitting dance of hand gestures in perfect synchronicity together, is particularly charming  —  and, what’s more, the young writer/director seems to know exactly what she wants from each scene. The film itself isn’t breaking much new ground, but it does herald the rise of another talented young filmmaker.

Another Round: Thomas Vinterberg has a penchant for enigmatic endings. Not so coincidentally, he also tends to make very good films, and his latest, which stars Mads Mikkelsen as a disaffected high school teacher, who along with a small group of male colleagues, decides to try keeping his blood alcohol level at .05% throughout the day as a cure for his malaise, fits the bill. It might not be up to the otherworldly standards of his best work (Celebration or The Hunt  —  which also starred Mikkelsen), but it’s a good snootful of warm bourbon just the same. Mikkelson plays Martin, a history teacher and family man who seems half-alive, encased in a shell of hardened disappointment. He knows he’s lost his way (“Do you find me boring?” he asks his wife, played by Helene Reingaard Neumann, who responds “You’re not the same Martin I first met”), but seems unable to get himself out of his lethargy to do anything about it. When confronted by an angry group of parents and students that he’s not doing enough to prepare them for their all-important final exam, all he can respond with is a meek “Okay.” One night, out with some male colleagues, including psychology teacher Nikolaj (Magnus Millang), music teacher Peter (Lars Ranthe), and lonely gym teacher Tommy (Thomas Bo Larson), Martin breaks his silence and tells his friends about the perilous state of his marriage. Nikolaj cites the work of an obscure philosopher who maintained human beings were born with .05% less alcohol in their system than is ideal, and, on something of a desperate gamble, the group agree to reach that limit throughout the day (in other words, during teaching hours), quitting, as Hemmingway did, at 8 pm. Initially, it seems to work wonders  —  revitalized, Martin brings relish to his teaching again, and he re-engages with his wife and kids in a way he hasn’t felt in years, with the others all sharing the same sorts of success  —  but when the emboldened group attempt to push the envelope, first to .1%, then, much more disastrously, to the absolute limit of their tolerance, things get a good deal more dicey, putting the men, their jobs and their relationships in peril. Typically, Vinterberg avoids simple conclusions  —  and God help us all if this film gets picked up by a U.S. studio and remade with, say, Vince Vaughn, Kevin James, Steve Buscemi, and Chris Rock  —  providing more or less equal examples of the delirious fun drinking with your friends can be (the film opens with a group of high schoolers gleefully doing “lake races” whereby teams compete to drink a case of beer while running around the nearby body of water; and closes with the same teen crew, and some of their teachers, whooping it up in celebrating their graduation); and the horrorshow it can become (one teacher ends up peeing the bed, and on his wife in the process, another wakes up bloodied and out of it in front of his neighbor’s house), leading to very real and horrible consequences. By film’s end, as the delightful Mikkelsen, a professionally trained dancer, performs an impromptu and wildly entertaining series of complicated dance choreographies, it’s clear Vinterberg doesn’t intend to answer definitively either way on the subject: As “The Simpsons” so sagely put it many years ago, alcohol is “the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.”

In a year of bizarre happenings, and altered realities, TIFF has shifted its gears to a significantly paired down virtual festival. Thus, U.S. film critics are regulated to watching the international offerings from our own living room couches.