#They're happier than they've been in YEARS but they don't remember YOU

[spacebar2]

I only like the dsmp ending because I like pain and misery.

[enchantress-arc]

In all honesty I desperately want to just start hypnotizing more people, and using them to hypnotize others. Turning them into walking advertisements for being a thrall. They're constantly blissful, constantly horny, they don't have to think or make decisions, their goddess does that for them, their goddess controls them and they couldn't be happier. Sure, they've been turned into a personal slut for a woman with basically no free will of their own, but that doesn't seem like a bad thing.

CW: Some hypno related CNC stuff. Just general "person being covertly hypnotized" type stuff.

Doing it in a more covert manner sounds wonderful as well. Say you happen to run into a friend. They say things in a bit of an odd manner sometimes, but they're able to hold a normal conversation. About halfway through a conversation with them you realize you're not sure what they're saying anymore All you know is that you want to keep listening. And it wouldn't really hurt to go meet their new friend. Of course, they're right, you'll get along with her quite well. When you first meet her, you can tell that there's something different about her.Something about her is just enchanting. It feels nice to listen to her voice. And she's so attractive. It's not hypnosis or anything, it's just a hot woman, of course it's normal to feel this way about her. Normal to get on your knees for her and kiss her bulge through her pants. And maybe go a bit further. The aftercare is perfect, just feeling her hold you, whispering affirmations into your ear. You barely notice the friend that brought you here masturbating in the corner, watching as you fall into her grasp. You can only focus on Her now. Only Her. She is all that matters. You fall asleep in Her arms, and you feel wonderful upon waking up. You leave, and go about your day like normal, working, doing chores, and you end up talking to a friend. You notice them starting to act a bit odd, tired, even more agreeable than normal. And suddenly the thought pops into your head that they'd love meeting your Goddess. They'd hit it off almost instantly, you're sure of it. And when you bring them to meet Her, you see them start to sink, start to become Hers, and you realize what's happening. She brainwashed you. You've been slipping little subliminal messages into your conversation with them, and you didn't even notice. You took a friend, someone who's trusted you for years, and you brought them to have their free will devoured, rewritten, brainwashed. You know you should be horrified, but you're not. You just want to watch. You want to play with yourself. It feels natural to play with yourself while you watch your friend become a doll, a drone, a perfect little sleeper agent to bring Her more toys. Oh god it's hot. You're Hers. You don't feel remorse, you feel arousal. It's perfect. She is perfect. And soon your friend is going to see that too. You don't finish that night. You both leave Her home in the morning, before you walk out the door, She makes you stay while they head out, and calls you a good thrall. You climax immediately, all of the buildup from last night coming back in an instant, stronger than anything you've ever felt before. And then you go about your days as usual. Maybe you don't run into anyone you know today, and you just go home. You remember what She did to you, what she did to your friend. And you just can't help it, you start playing with yourself. Your friend is probably doing the same thing to someone else right now. And it's your fault. Oh god it feels wonderful to know that, that someone else is being prepared to be brainwashed by your friend, and you did this to them. You made them a thrall. Who knows how many people you've doomed just by letting your guard down. You can feel the pleasure building, but never coming to a climax. And you want to finish. You wish She would give you permission. And then you remember this morning. She allowed you to finish after you left with Her new toy. She'll allow you to finish if you bring Her another. You're a good thrall. Good thralls finish when they please Her. When they bring Her more toys. You're a good thrall. You'll bring Her another toy. And this time you'll be fully aware of what you're doing. You'll feel your arousal growing as you slip those little subliminal messages into their head. It'll be even stronger next time with all of this buildup. Even better. Goddess rewards good thralls. You're a good thrall. And you'd do anything for Her.

[kimingyuslover]

Screen time

Synopsis : Soonyoung can only see you on his screen now.

Word count : 905

Pairing : Kwon soonyoung x reader

Genre : angst, lovers to exes

Warnings & note : TEARS, soonyoung's an ass, members mentioned, mention of alcohol, one (1) curse word, a few paragraphs are the literal lyrics lol, this fic does not represent his character in real life!

★ reading through the screen time lyrics translation today, WHY IS IT SO SAD???? anw sorry for my bad grammar

☆ check out my other works > main masterlist

“Come on soonyoung, it's been what? 2 hours and you still checking your phone” Jun said while patting soonyoung's back lightly.

It's been a year since they broke up, and soonyoung still can't let you go. The worst of it? He's the cause of the downfall of your relationship.

Soonyoung failed to realise that he's an ass throughout your 3 years relationship, and when he did, you cuss him out and start to pack your belongings.

“I still love her, jun. it hurts" Soonyoung held his left chest, feeling the pain from his heart, tears welling in his eyes waiting to fall every now and then.

Jun gives him a sympathetic look, soonyoung’s other 11 friends are also worried about him, he refused to do anything except checking his phone as minutes pass, and they are aware of the reason.

It’s you.

When they heard about your break up, they didn't dare to do anything because deep down they know, this is the best for you, even though soonyoung have to be a miserable man.

they've seen the way he treated you back then, seungcheol remembers, the way soonyoung don't want to come to your third anniversary dinner even when he say he would come, and he easily lied to you that he exhausted so he sleep early last night even in reality he go to a club with them.

They tried, and they really tried to talk to soonyoung about his relationship. You always have to message them to know about soonyoung's condition.

They saw your disappointed expression when you have to pick up soonyoung the night you're supposed to have an anniversary dinner.

And they know you're done taking soonyoung's shit when you have to pick him up, again, and with the same expression as the night of your anniversary.

So when soonyoung said you both broke up, they're not surprised at all. The least they can say is that soonyoung doesn't deserve you, and he never will.

The night of your break up, soonyoung seems fine, and he always said that to everyone, but as days passed, he seemed to worsen more

His eye bags are prominent, and everyone can point out that he's not sleeping for at least 2 days.

Meanwhile, they can see you grow happier, away from soonyoung. Joshua, along with Wonwoo, are in the same department as you, and he can see the way you would always smile genuinely now. Before your break up, your smile always seemed to be forced.

After 1 month, soonyoung always stared at his phone, hoping that you would update anything, anything to your social media. You blocked him as soon as your relationship ended.

Then, you did, you’re always updating your life through social media, and he can clearly see you look so happy without him. He learned that it was, in fact, true because when he sees your old post, you don't seem to be happier than now.

Soonyoung cried everynight, wanting no more than to have your relationship back, to have your attention back to him.

He missed waking up to your eyes, and now he has to see them on his screen, both of his hands are occupied holding onto your relationship, and he keeps forgetting there is no relationship until the night returns and he gives himself up to slumber.

It's hard to let go of your relationship.

You're living as if nothing happened between both of you, you're colder than he thought, he feels naked and his heart is cold without you.

his worries were in vain, you're doing just fine without him, from your words to your happy photographs, he actually relieved, you're getting better.

Because he knows you're not going to get better if you're still with him.

He always wants to contact you, asking you how have you been? How are things? Is work going well? Are you taking care of yourself? Do you have any regrets?

He can't stop checking up on you. He worries about you everyday and night.

Your smile once an arrow that guided him, now it pierces his heart, he used to hate the attention you gave him, now he misses the attention that you gave.

He knew his regret was meaningless, he's sorry for the time you spent with him.

The days fade into the distant horizon, and your memories rise and fall. It's late, but he's sorry.

In the end, you're both going through different separations.

He wants to ask you another question, are you broken like him? He wants to know what you're eating and drinking these days and what you find happiness in.

He always wonders, what are you wearing today? who makes you laugh, who holds your hands, where you are headed.

He's just curious. This is how he has been, miserable.

“Tell the others we're going to the club, they can join us, i think i need more drinks” Soonyoung said as he got up from the couch and took his jacket, wallet, and lastly his phone.

Not even a minute later, his phone let out a sound of a notification he just set for you, he quickly checked his phone and opened his social media.

It was a photo of you, but you're not alone. There's a man hugging you close.

his eyes finding your caption in a fast motion, his heart breaks, yet again.

my boyfriend is getting more clingy lately

[eldrai]

While I like the Dogma & Tup being batchmates fanon, for whatever reason I'm drawn to them just meeting after Kamino and becoming friends to the point people just assume they're batchmates.

Tup's batchmate situation is pretty normal.

Dogma, on the other hand, only has two brothers leave Kamino with him. Their oldest (6920) was decommissioned before any of them remember him. The second oldest, '21, was decommissioned at five standard years. Dogma and '21 were close, and his other two brothers (who survived to have names, but I haven't thought of them yet because clone names are hard. '23 and '24) were close which left him as the odd one out after '21's death.

It also lead him to develop the attitude he did about following the rules. If you follow the rules, you won't be punished and if you're not punished, you won't be decommissioned, and they've already got eyes on their batch after '20 and '21. So Dogma became a sort of rigidly overprotective older brother to his other batchmates which drove a wedge between them quite considerably, furthering the three into a more twins + other dynamic instead of a trio. For their part, '23 and '24's withdrawal I imagine to be a combination of fear of decommissioning and a desire to distance themselves from their noticeably stranger batchmate, as the closeness to '21 makes them worry he could turn out the same way. Plus a little frustration on their end for Dogma seeming to boss them around all the time.

I think communication between them would not be very frequent and definitely not very personal. They're all more likely to keep tabs on the other one* (the two or Dogma) than actually reach out. I'm undecided whether it was strictly a numbers thing or a purposeful separation but I like to imagine '23 and '24 being assigned somewhere together with Dogma joining the 501st without any batchmates - not super unusual, as with fluctuating trooper numbers there's bound to be awkward numbers needed in different battalions, but generally most shinies have at least one batchmate initially.

He generally avoids talk of batchmates just because the assumption is that they died in battle if you have any fewer than four and he isn't keen to have to explain the situation nor revisit it; most of his happier memories were with '21 and he had a relatively lonely upbringing after that. I think it likely there would be some sort of stigma around having batchmates decommissioned, reconditioned or otherwise dead before graduating Kamino, a little like '23 and '24 were wary of Dogma. And he's self aware enough to know he doesn't want people to have another reason to find him off-putting.

I'm hesitant about writing it into any fics I'm currently writing just because I do like the Tup and Dogma thing and I don't want to box myself in. But I also want to explore a little what it might have been like on Kamino for Dogma

[yellowocaballero]

Anyway.

How many works do you have on AO3? 54. Hm. I don't remember writing 54 fics. That's weird. But I've been posting since 2017 so when you THINK about it 54 fics over 7 years isn't weird at all.

What’s your total AO3 word count? 2.4 million. What's your point.

What fandoms do you write for? A fuckton. I write both things I'm hyperfixated on and for random shit that comes in my head. I was into TMA for like two years so I have the most TMA fic (16), but most of my fandoms are 3-5 fics maximum. There's also a lot of random-ass fics for random-ass fandoms that just jumped in my head. Artemis Fowl, Beetlejuice, Animorphs...demons that overtook me for two weeks or so and never bothered me again.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? The Great Gender Heist (Artemis Fowl, no surprise there.), stay out of trouble (Detroit: Become Human, I reliably forget that one exists and I'm still mystefied as to why so many people read it), meek shall inherit (I'm constantly attempting to forget the Be More Chill phase ever happened), someone will remember us (Batman, fic's not great, am still very fond of that au) and dead or alive (DBH, mediocre). Why the hell are the two Detroit: Become Human fics so popular? I hate DBH so much. I was so angry while writing those.

Do you respond to comments? I am absolutely terrible about responding to comments. I am sorry. I do read and appreciate all of them. It's because I always need to give a dialectical so comments take ages to write. If you do want to hear my thoughts on something, my inbox is your best bet for a way too lengthy response.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Hope, Etc for certain. I try really hard to write bittersweet at worst endings, and even the sad endings in my fics have hope in them. Hope, Etc definitely ends in a better place than where it began. But it's still very sad. I was thinking about a lot of lost loved ones while writing it. Fishhooks and reel to reel also have downer endings but that is because they are LITERALLY Star Wars.

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Uhhhh. The ending of Solitaire (and the MLM/WLW hostility series in general) is very sweet. It's meaningful because it demonstrates so much growth from everybody with very little cost. I almost said Go Straight At The Cul De Sac, because it showcases a happier world where horrible historical events were averted, but the ending will always be a little bittersweet because we understand how much Protag sacrificed to create that better world.

Do you get hate on fics? Sometimes people are kind of weird. The worst of it is usually just useless comments, though. I had somebody get pedantic about how briefly mentioning an SUV would be historically inaccurate, and how I should have mentioned a minivan instead - like, did you read that fic and think I was from the suburbs? Do I look like I know what a minivan is? Lol? If I've received any actual more severe stuff I have no idea, since I delete the comment and delete it from my memory. I've never gotten anything too bad. I've been called ablest like three times, which is objectively hilarious.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? If I could write smut I'd be making bank on Kindle Unlimited right now.

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Probably the FE3H/BNHA one I'm writing right now that will never see the light of day. Just kidding. I don't actually think I've posted any real crossovers - I DO write them, I just kind of feel like they're cringe so I never post them. I write a lot of cringe shit that never sees the light of day.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not nearly popular enough for that.

Have you ever had a fic translated? Several people have mentioned wanting to do that, but nope.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Not technically. But I do want to give due honors to all of the friends who are SO instrumental in the building of the AUs, stories, characters, etc, that they've had a huge impact on the story itself. I try to recognize them by name in the fics themselves but my stories would look completely different if it wasn't for my friends. Definitely much worse.

What’s your all time favorite ship? I'll differentiate favorite ships and favorite fictional romances. For ships, it's much less about the ship and more about the role in the story. I tend not to pay a lot of attention to that while writing, but sometimes I get lost in my own sauce and I drive myself a bit nuts. I am very fond of Hanyookim, especially in my own ORV story. For romances? My top ten list of fictional romances is as follows: number one: naturally, Sasunaru -

What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? If it's up on AO3, it's done (with one or two very small exceptions - The Ending of Han Sooyoung epilogue I'll get to you I PROMISE). There's plenty of unfinished docs on my drive that I'll never finish, but that's because I decided that they weren't worth finishing.

What are your writing strengths? Dialogue and characterization. That's always been the case. I'm also pretty funny.

What are your writing weaknesses? Plotting. Action. Having stories that are not entirely dialogue. Where things happen and it's more than just people walking around talking. You know. Real stories -

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Always valid. I remember reading one Hispanic author talking about how he doesn't like italicizing the Spanish in his stories because it's otherizing, and I agreed enough with him that I don't tend to italicize other languages either. Sometimes I do. I try to do it purposefully, and to convey something that can only be conveyed through the extra language. I'll also only do it if I can have a friend who speaks that language write it out for me, since gtranslate sucks and I want to ask the friend how such a thing would actually be said and colloquialize it. I like using ASL in fics, and I am just in general begging people to a) write it like any other language, and b) understand that it's different from other languages and can't be written exactly the same. If your Star Wars fanfiction has so much gratuitous Mando'a that I can't understand anything the clones or Mandos are saying I hate you.

First fandom you wrote for? Batman Beyond. Yes, I have a FFN account somewhere. Yes, I was eleven. Yes, it was Batman Beyond.

Favorite fic you’ve written? The best thing I've written is Twilight on Owl Creek Bridge. Favorite is New Wave. That sucker took two years to write (INSANELY long for me) and it is exactly the story I wanted to write. Stephanie's a character I've been writing since I was 15, and the feeling of writing Stephanie and NAILING her for the very first time was so satisfying.

Tagging @usaigi and uh any other writer mutuals you all know who you are.

[tailless-whale]

Disclaimer: this post is mostly just me working out my feelings, trying to figure out how I feel etc. Also it's kinda long.

Ok so my partner is coming out as nonbinary (they/she) and I have a lot of thoughts about it...

I'm super excited for them!!! That feeling of accepting that you're trans is overwhelming but also so thrilling. I remember when my egg started to crack and I was like "fuck, I really am a boy". I got such a thrill when I accepted who I am. I'm so excited for them to be feeling that way and to be going through that journey because it's something I'm experiencing myself and it's been absolutely fantastic. Sure there were some painful moments but the positives far outweigh any negatives I've experienced. I'm happier than I've ever been in my life because I'm finally living my authentic self, and I'm so excited to see my partner go through all that and find herself. I love hearing how they're feeling and seeing how she gets a little happier when they tell me about her plans to transition.

I've also been thinking about and reevaluating my sexuality in relation to her gender identity. I struggled with my sexuality a while, and only recently (thought I had) figured it out. I used to identify as pansexual, but when I started dating again I found that I'm much more attracted to men than I am to women. For the past year or so I've identified primarily as a gay man, and my partner's transition has made me question that. I love my partner dearly and I plan to stick with them regardless of how they identify, but I do worry. I think I'm primarily attracted to masculinity, and I'm concerned that my attraction will wane if they decide to be more feminine. I don't think it will, but I do worry. I am a little frustrated though - I thought I had finally figured myself out, that I had a label that fit me - and now I don't know what I am all over again.

I've also been thinking about the challenges they'll face as a nonbinary person in a binary world. I identified as nonbinary for a long time before transitioning to a binary trans man, and it was hard feeling like I couldn't quite express my gender without facing opposition from those around me because I wasn't conforming to traditional gender roles. I don't think she'll have many problems with their friends, but I think some of her family will be a different story. I can see some of their family misgendering them out of ignorance or prejudice, and it's difficult and dysphoria inducing to be misgendered by people close to you. I don't like that she'll probably have to deal with that because I know how badly that hurts. I don't want her to feel pain because they're pursuing what makes them happy :(

I'm also wondering if their gender identity will change over time. Mine sure did! I knew from the beginning of our relationship that although they identified externally as a cis man, that they certainly are not a cis man. To be completely honest, I've been waiting for them to accept that they're not a cis man, and to actually do something about it. I've watched them try to perform masculinity in the same way that I tried to perform femininity before my egg cracked. Our second date they told me they didn't like their name and they prefer to go by things other than their birth name, and that they've already tried out a few names. When I asked them what name they would have chosen for themselves, I filed that answer away and nearly a year later, she told me that she was thinking of going by that same name they told me our second date. They've made so many offhanded comments that made me say "oh yeah, they're definitely not cis" that I was surprised this didn't happen sooner. I'm so happy that she's starting to accept, and perhaps eventually embrace their newfound gender. I do wonder if they'll ever go full girl, but I don't want to push them towards something they don't want or something she's not ready to do yet.

They're planning on shaving off their beard on Thursday and I'm super nervous about that (they started growing it when we first started dating; they've had a beard the whole time we've been together) but I'm happy that she's doing what makes her happy. I know I'll love her regardless of how they choose to look 💜

Also, I love using they/she for her!!! It feels so natural; I always felt weird about calling them a he. I keep wanting to call them my girlfriend but I still need to ask how she feels about that... I default to partner for now but I'll admit while writing this post I accidentally typed "girlfriend" a few times and had to correct myself.

Regardless of my worries, I'm super happy and excited for my partner and I'm looking forward to holding their hand every step of the way as they embark on their journey to trans their gender. I'm literally giggling and kicking my feet thinking about how it feels to reach different milestones and feel validated in one's identity, and I'm so psyched to see them experience those feelings. This is the start of a new era for them and it's so exciting to see how excited she is to do this! :D

[lgcdaeul]

hello, friends! this is so late, but that tracks for me... 😅 anyway, you can call me 𝒋𝒂𝒄𝒆 & some of you may remember me when i was here a rather long time ago. i had a muse named jeong kian, & another named lee yuan ( aka the common denominator, iykyk ). i was feeling ✨ nostalgic ✨ about them recently, so i decided to introduce a newer muse of mine to this space, one inspired by yuan, but less of an agent of chaos, & i hope you enjoy getting to know him ( oh, & please like this post for plots )!

his name is 𝒚𝒖𝒏 𝒅𝒂𝒆𝒖𝒍. he was born on 20041002 in seoul, & someday, he hopes to become a main/lead vocalist, a singer-songwriter, & full-time hedonist...

🌙

daeul grew up in seoul as the son of a religious philanthropist / accountant, & a choir director. his family are devout catholics, & though he never enjoyed having to sit still for long hours in church, when he got old enough, he discovered his love of singing after joining his church's choir. his mother, its director, was overjoyed to see that she had something of a prodigy on her hands. she always bragged about how he must've been given the same musical gifts as her, a "blessing by god himself" if you will.

growing up, he learned quickly that, the likelihood of the people in his life accepting him for who he is was dramatically low, so he adjusted by painting on the most charming face he could, & keeping his real self hidden from them. there's truth to his charm, it's something he possesses to this day, but as a child, it was often amplified & used as mask. sadly, there was nothing more lethal-seeming to him than to be disliked or unloved. this is also something he possesses to this day.

for years, he appeased his parents & never focused on himself. when he wasn't at school or studying, he was working on his vocals, or he was attending piano lessons, or he was at church. all of his time was filled whatever they wanted him to do, & though their praise of him was nice to hear, he realized that it didn't feel meaningful. ever. their love started to feel superficial, & he was partly to blame. without realizing it, he manufactured himself into the perfect filial son, & the pressure of keeping that image up started to feel crushing.

where he truly found himself was in the hallways at school. an all boys' catholic school, at that ( it's giving bare: the musical / bare: a pop opera for all you musical theatre fans ). this is where he fell in love over & over again, where he wrote the best music he's ever written, & where he, strangely, felt more free than ever before. sure, the "freedom" he found was often in the form of sneaking around campus, hiding under bleachers, & staying after hours in the music room to kiss other boys, but it helped him put the pieces of himself together more.

then, he decided to be bold & audition for legacy entertainment. his boyfriend at the time encouraged him, saying that his voice was too good not to be heard on a wider scale, & feeling confident, he put his best foot forward & took a chance. little did they know, the company would decide to take a chance on him, as well. this is where his life changed entirely, & despite still being shackled to the strictness of a highly respected entity in the industry, he still feels more free than ever before. now, his entire life is steeped in music & creativity, & he's ultimately very happy; much happier than he was back at home.

now, how do his parents feel about all of this? well, they don't know about any of his high school shenanigans—thank goodness!—but in regard to his career as an idol, they're not very pleased. they miss him in church, as he's stopped going entirely, & they've noticed a change in him that they don't think is a positive one. unfortunately for them though, daeul strongly disagrees. he's never felt better. he wishes they were happy for him, but he's learning not to care so much about what they want for him.

no, this new chapter of life, he's vowed to focus on what he wants for himself. please wish him luck on this new journey forward!

✨

as far as plots are concerned, i'd love anything & everything! i'm a sucker for plots that include a lot of depth. as for daeul, he's a fan of a lot of romance. it could take on many forms, be they past or present, & he'd eat 'em all up like they're spoonfuls of lemon & honey.

despite deciding to be more "selfish" after leaving home, he's still a good friend to have around. he's there for everyone he loves. he'd also love music collaborators, duet partners, literally anyone that fuels him creatively, & that he can fuel creatively, too.

i'm sure some of his relationships with people aren't ideal, & he's still rather uncomfortable with the idea of anyone disliking him. he tries so hard to be pleasant & keep the peace ( typical libra sun ), but i'm sure some people can sense that some of that is fake. feel free to give him a hard time about it.

other side of the coin, being that he enjoys the finger things in life, daeul can occasionally come across as snobbish. maybe he said or did something that pissed your muse off, or he came across really disconnected during a conversation; something!

typically i prefer to brainstorm, so as mentioned above, feel free to like this post & i'll reach out to you for plotting. so excited for what we can come up with together!

[shrinkthisviolet]

Here's my hot take of the day: people are wayyy too harsh on Nate + Andy's friends.

The worst thing they did, which I'll never excuse them for, is throw Andy's phone around and make fun of how desperate she was to answer it. That was a jerk move.

HOWEVER people act like they constantly did this, which isn't true! They did it once, and never again.

Yeah, they were upset that she couldn't make it to Nate's birthday. You know why? Because they're adults with very different jobs, and all my fellow adults out there can attest how difficult it is to find free time to meet up with a bunch of friends. They planned that in advance, got a reservation, etc. So yeah, they were disappointed that she didn't show. I would be too!

But they didn't make her feel bad about it beyond that disappointment on the phone. They went on being friends, being warm and friendly with her, etc. Even Nate didn't make a fuss over her missing his birthday, because he knew it was for her job! People say he was petulant about it, but uh...no, he wasn't. He was disappointed she couldn't make it, but he clearly understood, even complimenting how she looked.

Lilly finally ends her friendship with Andy because she sees Andy happily flirting with Christian at the gallery exhibition. While Andy's still in a relationship with Nate. Yeah, I'd be pissed too if I saw my friend flirting with another guy while still in a relationship! It shows how Andy's letting the job get to her head and change her—she's emotionally cheating on Nate! Even if Nate sucked (which he doesn't), two wrongs don't make a right.

Speaking of Nate...so here's the thing about him, right: he is supportive of her, by and large. She starts off the job complaining, spends a lot of time doing that...but he supports her goal to stick it out for a year and then move into journalism.

The only times he raises misgivings are:

When he sees she hasn't quit after the manuscript incident. Remember that this is the same day she called him and was talking about how she's going to quit and how it's for the best, etc. She sounded happier than ever on the phone, too. So...yeah, as her partner, he's excited for her to quit, to put herself first (remember, they've been living together. He knows the crazy unhealthy hours she's had to work. Especially since her dad knew and brought up these concerns, Nate probably has too). And he's disappointed to see she didn't quit after all, and is even working on the twins' science project late at night. She's still sacrificing her wellbeing for this job, that's a valid thing to be concerned about. Him saying "I liked the old clothes" wasn't about the clothes—it was about Andy. He missed the old Andy, who didn't wear herself out for a job that didn't seem to care about her

When he finds out Andy's going to Paris, even though that was apparently Emily's thing, and hasn't told him. It's been a while since she found out (a few days maybe?), and you'd think she would confide something that serious in him, especially since this is coming from someone who, until recently, has only ever complained to him about Runway. Yes, we know Andy didn't confide in him because she's already having a crisis of conscience as it is, but he doesn't know that, because she won't communicate. And beyond that, she's not taking responsibility for her choice to stay in this job despite what it's demanding of her emotionally, mentally, and even it seems morally—she was backed into a corner by Miranda, sure, but she could've chosen to quit Runway and go work at Auto Universe, her backup option. She chose not to. That was an active choice she made, and Nate's right, she has to own that choice. She can express regret for it, but she has to own it. She's an adult, her choices are her choices.

Anyway. I just figured I'd make this since I rewatched recently and realized that the friends and Nate aren't actually as bad as other fans of this movie make them sound. I used to think they sucked too, but...no, not really. We just think so because we know way more about Andy's situation than they do, but the fact is, they weren't so horrible given what little they knew about what was going on.

[insertsickusername13]

okay yes toxic jake and chloe i love it. screaming yelling fighting, angry sex in bathroom stalls and school custodian closets and ruthlessly spreading rumors and absolutely hating each other for years but still ending up back together when it's dark and they're alone. jake and chloe who are shocked back into reality after the fire and squip and realize they're better off with other people yes yes endgame richjake endgame pinkberry or whatever other ship you want BUT also jake and chloe broken up but jake and chloe still in love with the idea of each other

jake and chloe in january after the fire when chloe comes out as lesbian and jake's so supportive in public but the second he's alone in his apartment he's in tears because I was supposed to marry her. It was over, he knew it was, but there was still some part of him that had his entire future revolving around coming back to her

Chloe with a girl, so much happier than she's ever been with Jake, but when things don't work out with that girl and she's single again she calls Jake with the intention of hooking up, of angry break up-make-up sex even though that break up was with someone else and it's only after he picks up that she realizes she doesn't want that anymore. He doesn't want that anymore. He still drives over and he still holds her but it's not like it was.

They don't forgive each other and they aren't friends but they've still got that time after the SATs in spring when jake took her out to lunch because he was finally stress-free and she can tell that they're there for a reason and she's scared it's going to be a I still love you, but then she's shocked with a "How'd you know?" "Know what?" "I mean. About. That. Girls. That you---" and he looks so flustered and scared and Chloe's trying to be better so instead of relishing in his discomfort she just talks him through everything and somehow it ends with him apologizing and her apologizing and they know they're never ever going to be what they once were---there's never even gonna be acquaintances, they'll see each other once a year when they come home for holiday breaks (if that, because does Jake really have a home to come back to?) but no matter what, she's going to be his first love and he'll be the only name she remembers from high school when she's old and has a life with new friends and a new personality that isn't just a manifestation of her own self-hatred

[natjennie]

hello mutual jennie natjennie im thinking rn like can you imagine if all the ghosts that had been there when cap was alive didn’t really pay him much attention bc they were all more occupied doing their own thing or thought some other soldier was more interesting or whatever. and then he died and they all realized oh shit this guy has a lot going on and they should have paid attention to what he was doing when he thought no one else was around bc there’s no way he’s telling them anything now. i don’t know where i’m going with this but like. you know

OUUUUGGHGGHHHH that's sooooooooo sad because like. I always forget that a lot of them were around for whoever else's death until it's really explicitly pointed out like fanny telling her story and thomas going "I did know all that, I was there" and the thomas thorne affair with everyone's different recollections of how it happened and the quick scene in perfect day when pat remembers his death but this time the ghosts are there and all wince like. it's hard to reconcile the ghosts as Ghosts in the past, that they've been here in roughly the same state through everyone else that has passed yknow within their timeline. kitty is kind of iffy because everyone seems to know that she's touchy about her sister and it's not wise to talk about her past, but no one outright takes over narrating for her or giving their own perspectives so it's hard to say if they definitely bore witness to her life but.

if the captain just. didn't get that at all. no one knew or noticed or payed attention. that makes everything so much more tragic because then NO one knows him. all those little things that make someone human, the things that only family and loved ones get to see, your quirks and your habits when you're alone and truly yourself. things that you would share with people you trust. NO ONE has shared that with him. because if the ghosts are around then there's always this little seed of hope, right like. when I said a nice word to my plant, someone noticed and cared and it made someone a little happier. or when I tripped and busted my ass it was embarrassing but it hurt and maybe someone felt bad for me in another plane. but if they straight up ignored him. he has nothing to show for his life. I mean we have no knowledge of a family or friends. other than havers but I can't get into that right now. so like.. no one in his life ever got close to him to feed that little spark of humanity. and then no one on this constant other plane of people noticed him either!

the idea that the ghosts don't say anything about cap's life not because they're respectful of his privacy but. because they don't know. and in all those years no one has tried to learn anything about him. they stay silent about the bomb and the letter and his time on the front and his military experience because they didn't care to pay attention to it.

it all just feeds so much into the fact that we are defined by our connections to each other and the idea that humans are social creatures and that like "these are my ribs- as defined by your reaching" or whatever that poem says. I mean. we become who we are because of our reflection in others. names are sounds other people use to get our attention. and he doesnt fucking have one.

[zoyalannister]

yes exactly, she used that space to gain representation points, even if it makes no sense the way and that obviusly is going to be awkward for flora to be with anna and ari in their first travel together because if cc sees anna as grief-free and happier than ever, then she would be affectionate with ari. maybe they even have to share suites even with different rooms, or share even rooms as women in that time wouldnt take a room to themselves in certain places, so it would be awkward.

also i noticed the end also has family scenes in one way or another of everyone except gabriel and cecily, which i don't get if it is to say they get excluded from the group , as in the last scene everyone was talking to someone not from the direct family except them that were alone with their youngest.

in the end there is also a scene where thomas and alastair are mentioning domestic stuff related to zachary like getting him a dog, they have been together so little, and zachary has a mother, why do they talk like they are the parents? there is not this approach with james and cordelia with him who are more solid in that moment

In my opinion giving more space to Gabrily would have made CC gain representation points, since they’re the ones who canonically accepted their daughter’s homosexuality and, unlike all the other characters that accepted their non straight children without beating an eye in 1903, for them it actually make sense.

Or, another representation, could have been revealing that Thomas is so scared of letting anyone know he is gay despite literally no one has problems wirh Anna being out and proud, is that he overheard Gideon tell Gabriel something like "are you sure you’re actually okay with Anna liking women?" and in ChoT Thomas and Gideon could have had an emotional talk about Gideon accepting him. It would have made more sense both for Thomas’s character and because we know Gideon since TID and the readers care about him.

But Flora popped out from literally nowhere, I don’t even remember if we knew her name before ChoT and now she is suddenly one of the best mothers.

Anon, don’t let me start about how shit Gabrily were treated in this book. Gabriel sees his batshit crazy sister holding a knife against his toddler's throat and says nothing?! Are you fucking kidding me?!

I totally believe that if Gabrily's personality hadn’t been devastated in this shit series, they would have probably sorted out the entire plot, resolved the miscommunication between Anna and Ari and saved Grace from Tatiana all in 40 pages.

But they had to be treated like shit and put aside even in their important moments. They were literally brought their son’s body but we are told that Tessa and Will cry because the idiots they have for children are alive in London and Gabrily aren’t even mentioned. Are you fucking kidding me?? Why should I care about Wessa??

And the fact that they are isolated in the end it makes sense to me, idk where you live, but unfortunately in my country is quite common that people leave alone a grieving family and since no one of the others cared about Kit, except for Henry Fairchild, in my head it makes sense that they all left Gabrily alone in their grief.

I will tell you a hot take, anon: if Wessa was done dirty one tenth of how much Gabrily was done dirty in this shit book (and series), the general consensus would be our opinion.

About Thomastair you’re 100% right: no one in their right mind thinks about family, a dog, adopting children with the person they've been dating just six months. Also Thomas and Alastair are so emotionally immature that they couldn’t even talk to each other about their own feelings until after they have sex, but somehow I have to believe they have this strong and pure love just because they're a MM couple.

They're barely able to take care of themselves, they shouldn’t have dogs or, god forbid, children at least for 5 or 10 years, when they'll maybe be mature people.

I think that Cassandra tried to recreate Malec 2.0, with the difference that Malec are more mature than Thomastair and they adopt Max after two years of relationship, since at that point both Magnus and Alex are mature enough to take care of a child.

Thomastair instead are too immature to have a conversation, why should I believe they are ready to adopt a child?

This book is just nonsense garbage.

[depthbuffer]

I absolutely love how clearly you can hear the progression of ideas, confidence, and access to equipment operating so clearly when listening to Radiohead's albums in chronological order.

Starting way back with Pablo Honey where they were little more than an above-average guitar & drum indie ensemble with some catchy song writing.

Then the opening bars of Planet Telex on The Bends hit, and it's like, what the balls? There are feedback loops, phasers, flangers, filters, echoes and delays all over that. I don't know what sort of gear they used, and feel like looking it up would remove a little of the magic, but it seems like the kind of stuff you could fairly easily do with access to little more than a decent console, a reel-to-reel recorder, and a larger collection of guitar pedals than they had before, and I choose to hold on to that headcanon.

The album as a whole frequently veers back into familiar live ensemble territory, but there are all these little touches here and there that show them starting to branch out into new (to them) techniques, and I like to think they knew exactly what they were doing when choosing the heaviest showcase for all of that as the opener.

Then comes OK Computer. The use of layering really shines here; they're clearly getting comfortable with using the studio to "perform" as a much larger ensemble than they really are. Again, every track is littered with these little touches of filter sweeps in the background, haunting one-off appearances of things that might be sampled vocals, might be theremins, might be synths.

And of course the vocals on Fitter Happier.

Then a three year gap. Which isn't actually as large as I remember: there had been two years gaps between each of the previous three albums, but this one will always feel longer to me because I didn't discover them until the OK Computer days. It was actually the first time I started paying attention to contemporary music; up until that point I'd payed recorder in school (as in, I was the nerdy one who could actually play and kind of enjoyed it, in a class of kids who had it forced upon them and didn't care, as was the done thing in British schools of the era), liked the idea of classical but didn't really love it, had a singular played to death Kraftwerk cassette (The Mix), and knew I didn't care for what I was hearing on radio or TV.

Kid A. What a rollercoaster. Does the opening track, Everything in its Right Place, contain a single acoustic instrument apart from Thom's voice? Again, I think they knew exactly what they were doing putting this one front & centre. It's synths, but it's not synth pop in any way, shape or form. These aren't the cheesy FM presets of the 80s. They were a medium different from the guitars and drums that had come before, but the message is still unmistakably Radiated. To anyone who'd been paying attention, anyway: people fucking hated it. Even I didn't know what to make of it at first.

Then they doubled down a year later with Amnesiac, like a massive middle finger to all the haters who just wanted them to keep doing what they'd been doing.

Which, ironically, is exactly what they were doing: but what they'd been doing all along was growing and evolving, they just took a bigger step this time.

Years later people have come round; to Kid A, at least. But they took their time. Amnesiac still gets little love, but go back and give it another chance. Pyramid Song. Knives Out. Dollars and Cents. Even the meandering two-minute one guitar, one synth noodle that is Hunting Bears. It's not the monument people wanted, but I maintain that it IS a monument.

I could go on, but I won't. It's a shame that Radiohead as a band barely exist any more; they've all started various side projects, the gaps been albums are getting longer. A Moon Shaped Pool came out seven years ago. But sadly it makes sense, given that their whole thing was always about finding new ways to express themselves.

[notebookmusical]

Hi! I meant to reply sooner but I guess I've been distracted so I apologize. Also I'm sorry if I can't remember everything. Oh that's cool..and it seemed like a fun trip. I saw some of your posts about seeing Holly Humberstone in concert and going to the aquarium. I hope you still ended up having a good time even though the airline or travel sucked. I've only been on one plane a long time ago so I can't relate. But I am also going out of town this weekend but we are driving. Also if you're still sick, I hope you're feeling better. My sister is starting to feel sick too actually.

I keep up with the show through gifs mostly and know the basics. I've watched a few clips too. I've also heard the show is a lot better than the books. What do you think? What is your favorite season so far? Does it match up with your favorite book? I think the most popular is season two with Kate and Anthony and that's the one I'm most familiar with too. I don't know much about Jonathan Bailey but I heard him sing the last five years before so I know he can sing pretty good so I'm excited to see him as Fiyero.

Haha I love Shameless but I wouldn't really compare it to The Bear besides the attitude of his and other characters I guess. It's about a tough Chicago family and they deal with crazy situations. Unfortunately I never even finished the show and I don't remember why. It definitely got weaker in the last few seasons. I still love it but think it would be a hard show to recommend based on what you like lol but I'm excited for the Bear.

Billie's album has grown on me a lot more now with more listens. I'm glad you liked it. I feel it was a good mix of her other albums if you never listened to her before. My favorites are Skinny, Lunch, Birds of a Feather, L'amour de ma Vie and Blue. At first, I wasn't impressed and the transitions or production threw me off. I think two songs were actually pretty similar to Taylor actually. The obvious one was L'amour de ma vie which I knew even reading the title translates to love of my life. It's similar or almost the opposite cuz in this song she's saying she said it but Taylor says the other person says it about her. I just found that interesting that it was the same concept basically being told in a different way. I feel similarly about gonnagetyouback and Get Him Back by Olivia and I guess Peter vs Wendy. How they're not really similar songs at all despite having the same kind of idea. The other one was that the end of the Greatest in the bridge reminded me of her song Happier than Ever but also the bridge of Smallest Man who Ever Lived. But I don't think Billie is similar to Taylor at all compared to the other two..I think she is more like Lana. I just found it to be an interesting coincidence though but that's all. I need some more time with Zayn's album but my favorite is called Stardust. Overall I like that all of the 1D boys have different styles and music and same for all of the popular albums from this year.

The new twenty one pilots album is amazing and I love it so much. It's like a blend of all of their styles which is really awesome. I liked it right away but my sister was expecting a bit more since they said it would have a lot of lore and it was the end of a story they've been telling for the past few albums. They also had a Livestream and music videos for each song which they talked about so it felt like an event and was really fun. I definitely recommend the album but don't feel bad if you don't get to it. I also feel behind on some albums since I've spent lots of time listening to this album and Taylor's, but they will both definitely be my albums of the year lol. I am already starting to connect some songs with past Taylor songs too. I think if I had to pick a Taylor album to compare it to, maybe Midnights? But there has also been some theories about a double album too and if the story is truly over which also lines up perfectly with Taylor lol. But we are also waiting on one more mv to drop that can wrap up the story so idk. Anyway my favorite songs are Next Semester, Navigating, Midwest Indigo, Vignette, Snapback, Oldies Station and Paladin Strait.

Omg how did you only just now watch the sisterhood of the traveling pants movie? I love the movie and thought it was a good adaptation of the book. I did read the whole series too which I love. Did you also watch the second movie too? They also said a while ago that number 3 is still in the works and I love that they're still close too. I think just based on what I've read so far, Funny Story will be in the middle maybe and I understand some criticisms. The plot itself seems more tropes compared to her other books but it's also a mix of her other books to me. So far, I think I like Beach Read or Book Lovers the best. It is interesting when I read articles about which ones are the best and the rankings are always different, which is good cuz there is something for everyone and people connect with different things. I will definitely try to finish along with Carley's too hopefully now that it's summer time.

I can't believe the Tony's are almost here. I spent part of my weekend watching more performances and it's hard to say what will win best musical. They're all pretty different in a good way. I've also tried to read more reviews and what people thought but I'm still bad at predicting lol. I watched one Stereophonic performance and I think people seem to like it a lot so you're probably right about it winning. It makes sense if it's about musicians that it would only be about an album worth of songs though. I think my favorite is the Outsiders still, but I'm probably biased cuz of the book and I have read pretty mixed reviews. I will send the rest in a part 2!

you're totally fine, friend! <33 hope you've been well!! i did have a good trip regardless of the travel day from hell. i hope you're having a fun time out of town!! did you know that i have never been in a car longer than like three hours (basically how long it would take me to drive down to portland or vancouver)? i am still sickly :( me and my victorian child immune system just does not want to kick this cold away unfortunately.

my favorite season is season two! and it matches with my favorite book (anthony's)! i think my ranking of the siblings are: anthony → francesca → hyacinth → eloise → gregory → colin → benedict → daphne & in terms of books, it's anthony → francesca → colin → hyacinth → eloise → gregory → benedict → daphne. the new season is coming so soon and i'm very excited! i saw some kanthony related spoilers on twitter, and am stoked. i loveee jonathan bailey! he's phenomenal in the last five years, and was also so lovely in company and american psycho! i'd love to see him do more theatre.

i really really like billie's new album! a couple of the songs on there have made it onto my june playlist (lunch, birds of a feather, wildflower, and skinny)! i've also been listening to maggie rogers' newest album quite a bit, as well as please please please by sabrina carpenter, isabel by isabel pless and close to you by gracie abrams. and of course, charli xcx's newest album, brat — i've been listening to b2b, von dutch, 360, club classics and talk talk a lot.

there's a lot of quintessential movies that my friends grew up watching that i totally missed out on! sisterhood of the traveling pants was one of them, and i'm really glad i got to watch it with a friend who loved it — made the experience so much more special! i haven't gotten around to watching the second movie yet; scheduling movie nights with my friend is difficult (we have opposite work schedules) but i think we will watch it together eventually! and then the third one, when it comes out!

beach read and book lovers are my favorites! i'm very curious to see what emily henry writes next! i've been reading very little — just a lot of classics lately (finished the phantom of the opera, still making my way through gatsby & started the hunchback of the notre dame), and i started s./ship of theseus last night but i'll be taking my time with it! it's quite overwhelming!

tony awards next weekend!!! eeeee! i'm so excited! i'm really rooting for the outsiders (partially out of spite, partially because it's what i predicted). i wish stereophonic got to perform! i think it's silly they wouldn't let them! see you in a bit for part two <333

[webspinning]

hiii

self, for good, intimacy, mentor, social circle, exit, future prima iris, esi, lullabies, strix, embers within the underbrush

as always you don't have to do all of them :>

ohHO HO !!!!!!! heeheehee

Self; Prima Iris - Yes! She very much likes who she is and she knows others do too. Her confidence helps EDIT a lot, in some ways :) ESI - This sad wet man has never had an opinion on themself in their life. I think if FMSS or SNH said they liked who he was he'd be happy and take that as fact for himself, but uh, otherwise, I don't think he thinks about it. They have bigger problems. Lullabies - Likes who they are...kind of? They like how it makes others behave around them but they're not sure they're so sold on the whole showman personality- they'd probably be happier just existing, they show off enough as it is. Embers - Does now! Wasn't really a fan of themself in their very young years, but then again, who is :) they've changed since then, but would like to have a big more emotional regulation. For Good; ESI - They like to think FMSS made them better, but honestly, who knows. Lullabies - Iveya made them better and worse :) Saved from what would have been an unfortunate life, their quality of life definitely improved after she adopted them, but she also made them undeniably worse. Intimacy; Prima Iris - She's alright with flirting, anything beyond that she'd rather not engage in if she doesn't feel an immediate connection. She prefers long-term relationships, though she hasn't had anyone last beyond a few years. ESI - Just for speculation, this one, I think if iterators dated [or if ESI had time to date, rather] they'd prefer long term and probably be confused by flirting. Robot autism + projecting, perhaps? Lullabies - If they weren't taken I think they'd flirt with everyone under the [nonexistent] sun. I might have made them poly, I cannot for the life of me remember, but they like any manner of relationships as long as they're getting lots of attention. Embers - More picky with the person than the length, they're fine with anything but it has to be the right person for them. Mentor; ESI - raised eyebrow. stares at FMSS. They love her with their entire heart, probably more than is good for them because of The Situation. They'd probably die for Fortunes if, uh, if, uhhhm- They get along I think. Hard to put into words how I imagine them. Lullabies - Iveya was more of a mentor than a mother, quite honestly. Akirrhikki also helped them out, mostly with battle related things, and they learned some from Isabeth before she was killed as well. They've had a lot of people teach them various things :) They got along with Isa quite well, Aki was strictly business, and Iveya is the [platonic] love of their life. skipping Social Circle because I don't fully understand it :) Exit - One could consider FMSS' and the abrupt cutoff of communation between her and ESI at her shutdown clumsy even though it wasn't a mistake. It was definitely unintentional on Fortunes part. Future; Lullabies - They look forward to seeing Whisperer whenever they return to Hallownest...unfortunately, uh, there might be some complications there. Oh, and Seething! They're a common visitor to the Troupe tents just to see if they can spot their sibling. Almost the entire Grimm Troupe hates it when they visit because the both of them together are loud and annoying as fuck, but Seething is the class pet of the sorts so nobody can do anything but complain. They swap increasingly boastful [and fake] stories while hanging out, and Lullabies often gives Seething a bottle of the wine they're bringing back for Iveya. Nobody tell her. Thank you for these, I love doing them so much and they help me flesh out some of these ocs :) had to skip Strix because she's so young and doesn't have much development, it made the questions hard to answer

[brummiereader]

@mischievouslittlecreature Asher 🥰. He's such a good boy!

That four legged fur baby was such a joy to read about when he took note of his mum as she internally battered herself 😩.

Lucy watched Tommy where he was perched on the arm of a couch and talking to Lizzie, feeling her heart squeeze painfully, quickly looking away. Urghh I hate it, I hate it, I hate it! It was ok in canon because there was no one else. But in this story, which honestly feels more realistic than the canon series 😍, I couldn't stand the image of this. It's just heartbreaking. I get increasingly pissed of at Tommy when he even talks to Lizzie lol. I know it's just a messy situation, and not really his fault, but it hurts me to see Lucy this way. I'm waiting for the day he experiences the same feelings of insecurities, jealousy and heartbreak as she does right now, Lilly! You gotta give us a jealous, moody Tommy to compensate for the the torment you're putting our dear Lucy through ��.

She sat up a little when the room quieted so that Tommy and Arthur could each make toasts. At Tommy’s comment of being in a happier place, paired with a quick glance towards Lizzie, she swallowed painfully. Oof no, fuck that 😩! Arthur should never make speeches, look what happens when he does 😭.

I'm glad Lizzie is making an effort, and I thought it quite sweet how she approached them with a deck of cards to play a game. But her attitude always has me on edge as much as it has Lucy on edge. I feel like she could completely change her tune at any minute and start making her passive aggressive remarks again. Hmmm, I hope they both stay on their toes with her, and I REALLY hope, Tommy doesn't begin to underestimate her pettiness.

No, treacle, I didn’t know they took ya. If I did, I…” his eyes moved to the bandages that poked out from under the hem of her shirt. “That wouldn’t have happened. Ahhh I love how he talks to her 😩❤️. Which only makes this scene even more upsetting for Lucy. Although I don't know much about their relationship, it's clear that their genuine friends that care deeply about the other. But the famous line from the Godfather "it's not personal, it's just business" feels appropriate in this scene.

“We have to go back for the fucking dog.” Tommy heaved. - “We should take the dog,” Lucy spoke at the same time. They shared a look, then a small nod of agreement, and turned around to gather up Cyril’s lead and wrangle him with them towards the car. I love that you added this part, because this is exactly what I imagined happened. I would bet money on Tommy just coming to a stop with a huffy "fuck", knowing he's gotta go and get the dog 😂. Just one more animal to their growing zoo 🤭!

They’d both been drinking more. And his stash of opium for the pipe that they sometimes shared, usually enough to last nearly half the year, was already almost depleted. Most nights one or both of them woke up screaming. Ahh, loving the shared despair! And how they both were mutually going through the horrors, spiralling down together. It feels very intune to their whole relationship and their codependency. When one falls, the other rapidly falls after them. Even though it was a powerful scene to read, i think it was the fact that little Charlie saw his parents in this way that ultimately had them stop. They love that boy so much, enough to force themselves out of the pits.

The smut scene was so beautifully written. I'm honestly relieved they've been able to get back to that point where she feels comfortable enough to be intimate with him. They're both so passionate, so obsessed with the other that It would almost feel unnatural to not read about them in this way.

“Lucy, do you remember when you asked me if I’d ever thought about entering politics?” ahh shit, here we go 🤦🏼‍♀️😂. This line reminded of the scene with Freddie and Ada when she says about the moment his balls are empty it's back to politics 😅. Freddie and Tommy are more alike than they'll ever admit! But the problem with this line means...a tonne load more of problems are coming there way. One of the biggest, Tommy's marriage to Lizzie 😬.

Amazing chapter, hun! Can't wait to catch up on the latest one you posted as soon as possible 😍.

Part 21: The Shadow of the Abattoir

Fandom: Peaky Blinders

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x OC

Summary: The vendetta may be over, but peace is still but a distant dream for both of them. 

Word Count: 5,769

Notes: Warnings for depictions of trauma, chronic pain, insecurity, smut, and references to torture and pregnancy.

Previous Chapter • Series • Fic • Next Chapter

Chapter 28: Scarlet Fog

She sat huddled in a corner, watching the celebrations occurring around her as distantly as if she was looking in through the window. She supposed, in a way, that she might as well have been. No one had really paid her any attention throughout the entire gathering.

They were all assembled in one of the big sitting rooms in Arrow House, drinking and chatting and laughing. Lucy watched Tommy where he was perched on the arm of a couch and talking to Lizzie, feeling her heart squeeze painfully, quickly looking away. 

She would have to get used to that: seeing them together. Side by side as their own little unit while she was pushed aside.  

At least Tommy finally seemed happy again.

How horrible did it make her, that she found herself half longing for the time when it had just been her, him, and Charlie?

Of course she did not want Tommy to be miserable. Of course she did not want him and his family to be estranged. Things were better this way, of course they were. She could take it; feeling like she was an outsider encroaching where she was not wanted. Like she was not as valued. Not loved. She’d done it before, prior to the schism between him and the rest of the Shelbys. She could do it again. 

At her feet, as if sensing her thoughts, Asher whined, raising his head. She gave him a tiny smile, reaching out to scratch him behind the ear. His tail thumped against the rug, looking up at her as if to say, I still love you, Mommy.

He’d been glued to her side since they came home, protective on account of her still healing injuries. She was grateful for his presence and companionship. Being alone had gotten a lot harder than it had been previously. 

She supposed she would have to get used to it just being her and the animals for stretches of time. Moments spent alone with Tommy would get even rarer after Lizzie’s baby arrived. Lucy couldn’t help but wonder if she would see much of him at all. 

She sat up a little when the room quieted so that Tommy and Arthur could each make toasts. At Tommy’s comment of being in a happier place, paired with a quick glance towards Lizzie, she swallowed painfully, trying hard not to read too much into the look, and failing miserably. 

Surely it had to be coming soon. The inevitable. When Tommy sat her down and gently told her to pack her things. That he could no longer be with her. Because he loved someone else. And that someone else had demanded he chose between them. And of course he was going to choose the one he was already having a baby with. Who was loved by his family. Who wasn’t broken beyond repair. Who he could actually have a chance at a happy future with. 

As if sensing her thoughts, Asher nudged at her knee with his nose, trying to draw her attention away from the ache in her heart. With stilted movements, she reached down to stroke his soft black fur. 

Next was Arthur’s toast. A dreaded look crossed Tommy’s face at his brother’s insistence that he take a holiday. The expression only deepened when Arthur raised his glass to peace. Lucy wondered if Tommy was thinking the exact same thing that she was: there would be no peace for them. Not now; not ever. Not with the things that lived eternally inside their heads. 

Once the toasts were done, everyone began slowly making their way towards the doors leading into the dining room. Lucy made no move to follow them, just shrinking tighter in on herself in her little corner whenever someone wandered past her. 

“Lucy?”

At the sound of Tommy’s voice, closer to her than she’d expected–she had figured he’d just head straight into the dining room with Lizzie–she looked up. Those blue eyes of his were fixed on her questioningly, shuffling a little closer to her while everyone else drew further away towards the other room. Tommy cocked his head. 

“Are you coming?”

Drawing in a shaky breath, she shook her head. Fingers still carding mindlessly through Asher’s fur, trying to focus on the soft pelt to keep herself grounded. “I’m not hungry.”

Tommy sank down into the vacant spot next to her on the couch. ���Are you in pain?”

“No. I’m just tired.” Only half the truth. Her cuts and shoulders were starting to ache a little.

He frowned, one hand moving to rest on the cushions behind her back. “You’ve barely eaten since we got back, sweetheart.” When she didn’t say anything, he scooted closer to her. “You need to eat.”

“I’m fine.” Eager to change the topic, she swirled the remainder of whiskey in her glass before downing it, mind fishing for something else to talk about. “What did Lizzie have to say?”

“Nothing all that interesting. Just some things about a few renovations that she wants to make to her house.” She could feel Tommy’s worried eyes still fixed intently on her. 

“This’ll be the first holiday you’ve taken in awhile. What do you think you’ll do?”

“I don’t know.”

Her gaze drew back to Lizzie where she was standing by the doorway, smiling and chatting animatedly with Polly. She’d been nicer to her since the kidnapping, but Lucy couldn’t help but feel a constant level of tension when around her, waiting at any moment for her to have said or done the wrong thing that would cause Lizzie to snap at her. “You should use it to spend time with her. Could even move into her house for a little while.” She looked down at her empty glass, in desperate need of a refill. “Be there for all the big moments in the pregnancy and everything.”

“And leave you here all alone?” Tommy asked. The worry she’d sensed in his gaze had leaked into his voice.

“I’d survive.” A lie, she was pretty sure, but he didn’t need to be burdened with that. 

“You’re still healing.”

“I’m not an invalid.”

“I know, but…I don’t want to leave you by yourself. If I have to take a bloody holiday, I’d rather spend it with you.”

Sighing, she kept her gaze glued to the floor until Tommy’s hand forced her head up, his icy blue eyes boring into hers, trying to read her mind. 

“I am not leaving you alone.”

“But you should–”

“Fuck what I should do!” His throat flexed, eyes darting towards the doorway to make sure no one had heard him. Drawing in a deep breath to steady himself, he looked at her, jaw set in that stubborn way she knew meant she’d have better luck picking up an entire mountain than getting him to change his mind. “I’m not leaving your side. End of discussion.”

Shaky sigh leaving her lips, Lucy nodded defeatedly. The back of Tommy’s hand stroked over her cheek. The rest of the family had wandered out the doorway, leaving them alone. 

“Please come to dinner.”

“No one wants me there anyway–”

“I do.”

For some reason, that made her feel like she was about to cry, leaning closer to his side unconsciously. When his fingers ran delicately through her hair, she closed her eyes. “Promise me you aren’t just saying that because you feel sorry for me.”

His fingers tightened a fraction where they’d come to rest on her shoulder. “I promise.” He turned her face to look at him. “I swear it on my mother’s grave. I want you with me always. Eh? Every second of every day.”

She closed her eyes, leaning into him, letting the words soothe her and abate the raging insecurities inside her. Even if only for a moment. 

“Come on,” his lips moved against the top of her head as he kissed her forehead. “Please don’t make me face them all alone.” His chin shifted against her head, cheek laying against her hair. She huffed out a tired, breathless laugh against his chest. 

“Alright. Since you asked so nicely.” 

He took hold of both her hands with a small smile, helping her to her feet and entwining their fingers as they began to follow the route that the rest of the family had taken out of the sitting room and into the dining area. Asher padded along beside them, his ears twitching every once in a while as he remained watchful and protective in demeanor. 

Tommy helped her into her seat next to him at the table, his ankle hooking around hers, the toe of his shoe every once in a while rubbing up and down along her shin whenever she started to get anxious.

Once the meal was over and everyone retired into the drawing room, she wound up seated on a couch with Tommy’s arm around her, her head resting lazily on his shoulder, trying not to doze off despite how tired she was. Lizzie eventually approached them timidly with a deck of cards, shyly proposing that they all play, and soon enough they had a lively game going amongst themselves and several family members. 

For a little while, she thought that things might actually get better. 

∗ ∗ ∗

Lucy quietly lamented the fact that she’d probably be picking little granules out of her socks on the drive back home as her boots sank into the sand. Overheard a seagull squawked, riding the cool wind that rushed over the beach. Waves roiled and crashed against the shore, lapping across the sand until they almost kissed the toe of her shoes. The sand where they were standing was damp, hardened over with moisture more so than the soft, dry mounds they’d had to traverse to approach the figure already standing on the otherwise abandoned beach when they arrived.

He was just looking out over the expanse of the waves, a huge bullmastiff seated next to him, his lead clutched in Alfie’s hand.

Lucy stared at her friend, confliction weighing heavily inside her. Despite everything, she still considered Alfie an important figure in her life. He’d helped to save her, a long, long time ago. And his position as an ally to the gang had brought with it significant advantages. But perhaps most importantly, she liked him. He was fun, and deep down she really did believe that he cared for her and Tommy. 

Just not enough to stop him from betraying them when the price was right. 

“Alfie, did you know that they took me?” she asked, voice hoarse. The salty wind whipped at strands of her hair, leaving them to dance around her face. Alfie, who until that moment had hardly turned his head to look at them, finally glanced over at her. 

“No, treacle, I didn’t know they took ya. If I did, I…” his eyes moved to the bandages that poked out from under the hem of her shirt. “That wouldn’t have happened.” He said, looking at her regretfully before turning back to stare at the rolling waves. Lucy swallowed painfully at the truth in his voice, a little of the weight lifting from her shoulders at knowing that her friend had, at the very least, not been involved in the horrors that had been enacted upon her. 

He and Tommy talked for a while more. Well, Alfie talked, Tommy mostly just listened, and then Tommy pulled out his gun from inside his coat. Lucy turned away, face contracting, unable to watch. 

The pieces fell into place at Alfie's revelation of his cancer diagnosis. So he’d wanted them to kill him, then. Or maybe he was just saying it so they wouldn’t feel so bad after it was done.   

She was still angled away from Alfie when he turned sharply on Tommy with his own gun, so she had no warning when a bullet suddenly skimmed across Tommy’s side. Tommy pulled the trigger of his own weapon on instinct, and a sizable chunk of Alfie’s face was blown off. Both men collapsed backwards onto the sand. 

“Tommy!” Lucy lurched towards him, ignoring the way that the sudden movement pulled on her stitches. Her knees hit the sand, trousers growing damp from the moisture as she knelt at Tommy’s side, hands hovering over his torso. He groaned softly, legs kicking in the sand, damp granules sticking to the side he’d fallen on. 

“I’m alright,” he mumbled, hand going to his side. Blood stained his palm when he drew it away. “I’m alright, it just grazed me.”

Lucy glanced over her shoulder at where Alfie laid on his back, unmoving. Cyril was whining softly in distress, nosing at Alfie’s face. 

“I think he’s dead,” she said softly, not wanting to go over and actually check. Tommy swiped a hand down his face, gripping her hand to let her help pull him from the ground. She eyed his side worriedly. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

He drew his coat in tighter around himself, suddenly looking very small and fragile. “I’m fine,” but his voice was anything but, rough and rasping in his throat. He took one look at Alfie’s body and cringed away, arms squeezing tighter around himself. Lucy watched as his head bowed, sorrow etching onto his features. For a second she thought that he was going to cry. “Come on.” With a jerk of his head, he gestured for them to head back towards where they’d parked the car. 

Shuffling to follow him, she curled close to his side, the pair of them beginning to slow trek off of the beach. The lump in her throat kept building every time she looked back at the figure splayed out in the sand. A few sniffles left her, and she hastily wiped her nose on her sleeve.  

“He fired to force you to shoot him,” she noted quietly as they walked. With how close they’d been, there was no way that Alfie would have missed his shot like that if he’d actually wanted to cause Tommy legitimate harm. 

“Yes.”

She tightened her arms around his bicep, cheek squishing against the soft material of his coat as she sought refuge from the chilly air against him.  

They got about halfway down the beach before they both stopped at the same time. 

“We have to go back for the fucking dog.” Tommy heaved. 

“We should take the dog,” Lucy spoke at the same time. They shared a look, then a small nod of agreement, and turned around to gather up Cyril’s lead and wrangle him with them towards the car.  

∗ ∗ ∗

Three months passed. 

Lucy healed slowly, the scabs of her injuries scarring over into rough, pale bumps on her otherwise smooth skin.

Tommy knew that she was horribly self conscious of them. Really, he was pretty sure that she thought them far worse than they actually were. She was still beautiful to him, even if the sight of the criss-crossed marks all over her back triggered sorrow and guilt to wash over him at the reminder of the pain she’d gone through.  

Slowly, she was able to do more. The stitches were removed and the bandages came off. Her shoulders were still giving her trouble, but according to the doctor, that would always be the case. He tried his best to help her, giving her massages and bringing her ice packs on the days that the pain was particularly bad. Applying salves that Polly sent over to help relax and soothe the muscles. By all accounts, she was considered healed. At least physically. 

And yet she was worrying him. Hell, he was worrying him. 

Golf. Fishing. Both were things he’d heard that other men liked to do on holiday, but he only got to the sixth hole at the golf course before throwing his club across the green field, not out of frustration, but from sheer boredom. The entire game was so…useless. Lucy had raised her eyebrows at him from where she was leaning against the little green plaque that displayed the hole number. 

“You know you’re supposed to hit the ball with the club, right?” she’d asked. Tommy shook his head, yanking out a few notes to pass to the caddy carrying his clubs. 

“We’re going home,” he mumbled, draping his arm around her as they started the walk to the car. “This is ridiculous.”

Fishing hadn’t fared much better. They’d been sitting by the bank, Lucy leaning into his side, eyes staring numbly out at the pond. For a second, the world was quiet and peaceful. 

But the silence only made things worse. There was no sound to drown out the noises in his head. The horses and gunshots; the screams of men dying around him. 

An explosion suddenly boomed around them, and he dove to the ground, taking Lucy with him as he sent them both crashing half into the pond in an attempt to use the bank as a source of cover against enemy fire. One of his hands curled over his head while his body pressed hers to the ground, attempting to shield her from the perceived danger. It wasn’t until more sounds–gunshots, not explosions like he’d originally thought–and the barking of hounds, erupted nearby that he realized it was simply a hunting party passing by, and not the war returned with the intention of swallowing him whole. 

“Tommy?” Lucy asked, voice quiet. She had grabbed onto the front of his shirt in surprise, her eyes wide. 

“Shit.” He leaned off of her, water sloshing around his legs, damp grass and dirt clinging to his arms where he’d rolled his sleeves up to his elbows. “Sorry.” He couldn’t quite meet her gaze, embarrassment burning its way across his cheeks.

“It’s okay.” She made no move to pull away, despite now standing nearly up to her waist in water thanks to him. Her head cocked a little when he flinched at another echoing crack of gunfire from the hunters. But she didn’t say anything, just reached out to flatten her palm on his chest. “Sweetheart?”

He finally snapped his head around to look at her. Fear suddenly seized at him as he processed how he’d practically grabbed and thrown her into the pond with him. “Fuck, did I hurt you?”

“What? No,” she shook her head. “I mean…my socks are wet now, but other than that, I’m fine.”

He’d helped her up out of the water, and quickly gathered together the fishing gear so they could head home. The fish weren’t biting anyway, and he didn’t want her sitting around in wet socks and trousers and catching a cold.  

They arrived home to find dinner ready for them at the table after they’d changed into dry clothes. Not that either of them touched most of it.  

Lucy had gotten almost as bad as him about eating. Where she once almost always cleaned her plate, she now often left it three fourths of the way full before pushing it away. And that was on the days that he was able to convince her to eat at all. Her body weight had dive bombed. She was even smaller than usual; so skinny it scared him a little. 

He could feel Frances watching them worriedly from the doorway, hands clasped together, lips set in a firm frown that only deepened when they both rose from the table and went into the drawing room to finish off their evening with two large bottles of whiskey and gin shared between them. 

They’d both been drinking more. And his stash of opium for the pipe that they sometimes shared, usually enough to last nearly half the year, was already almost depleted. Most nights one or both of them woke up screaming. He’d lost count of how many times he’d cradled her in his arms, rocking her gently against his chest, stroking her hair until she finally calmed enough to fall back into a fitful slumber. 

She’d draw him into bed to make love, only to push him away a few moments later, sobbing and burying her face in her hands. The phone would ring, but they never answered it. Even during the middle of the day, they kept the curtains drawn, the lights dimmed. Everything was easier in the dark.

They drank, and cried, and held each other, and drank some more. The cycle repeating over and over. He knew that they were both spiraling downwards into a deep dark well. But he did not know how to pull them out of it. 

Ultimately, it was not really him who gave the push for something to be done about things. It was Charlie. 

He was sprawled out on the floor, so drunk he was almost going cross eyed. Glass, from the objects he’d knocked to the floor during his tumble, had sliced into his palms, blood running in thin rivers down his hands. Lucy was kneeling beside him, reaching out to try to get a look at where he’d cut himself. Despite her movements being as uncoordinated as his thanks to her equally drunken state. Her makeup was a smudged mess around her eyes, black smears trailing down her cheeks from when she’d been crying earlier. 

The door creaked open, and Charlie peeked his little head in, and their eyes met. A look, not of sorrow or confusion, but complete, all encompassing disappointment crossed his little boy’s features as he took in the image sprawled out before him. Tommy swore that there was a hint of contempt in there as well.

“Charlie,” he choked out, trying–and failing–to scramble to his feet. Lucy’s head snapped around to fix on the boy, who was quickly ushered out by one of the maids. The door closed between them with a sharp, final click. 

Tommy managed to finally heave himself to his feat, injured arms crossed around his middle. Shame, hot and violent, bowled into him, and he folded at the waist, face collapsing in on itself as tears rushed into his eyes and began to stream down his cheeks. 

Never, never had he wanted Charlie to see them like this. But now he had, and that was something that would never be able to be undone. 

“Tommy,” Lucy pulled him into her arms, letting him bury himself in her chest while he mentally collapsed almost entirely on himself. Her fingers petted at the nape of his neck and down his back, trying to soothe him as he sobbed and sobbed and sobbed against her. 

The next day, he called Polly.  

∗ ∗ ∗

Lucy retreated to bed when Polly came over in the evening, mumbling something about being tired. Tommy didn’t try to stop her. She still felt so fragile, he was worried that if Polly took any of her usual swipes at her, it would cause her to only crumble further in on herself. So he’d just sent her off with a gentle kiss and a promise that he’d join her as soon as he could, watching to make sure that Asher followed her as she climbed the stairs.  

“Lizzie wants to see you,” Polly informed him not long after they sat down. Tommy’s stomach roiled with nausea, quickly looking away. 

“No.”

“Tom, she’s showing,” Polly tried again, but that just made the sick feeling in his stomach surge. The mental image of Lizzie’s belly protruding as his baby grew inside her elicited nothing in him but dread. The idea of having another child was completely overwhelming, and he was often struck with constant worry at how it would affect Lucy once the baby finally came and he would have no choice but to spend more time with Lizzie.  

He’d spent an awful lot of energy these past few months actively not thinking about Lizzie and the baby that would arrive in but a few short months' time. But Lucy…he had a feeling that Lucy spent far too much time thinking about them. She’d said some things, whispered mumbles while she was drunk, that made little sense to him. Things about how he should leave her. That she was bringing him nothing but unhappiness. How he could be happy with Lizzie if he just gave her a chance. He didn’t know if she was aware of the things she was saying, or if she even remembered uttering them after she’d sobered up. No matter how much he tried to soothe or contradict her statements, she always circled back to them. It was like an infection that was not actually getting cured, the symptoms only battered back for a little while by his reassurances before flaring up once again. He did not know how to entirely eradicate the insecurities brewing inside her.

“I don’t want to see Lizzie, Pol.” He looked down, ashamed at the words despite their truthfulness. He felt her looking him over, examining his reaction carefully. Ultimately realizing that now was not a good time to push the subject any further. 

“How’s Lucy?”

That got him to look up, brow lifting. “Since when do you care?”

Polly shifted awkwardly in her seat, it being her turn to look away. Tommy frowned, the almost apologetic look on Polly’s face uncharacteristic, especially when it came to anything involving Lucy. 

“Pol?”

 “Aberama says that I’ve been too hard on her,” Polly sighed. Tommy blinked, too stunned to speak for a moment. 

“You been talking with Aberama a lot lately?” he finally asked. Polly shrugged, squirming in place, clearly uncomfortable, looking for a way to dodge the question.

“How is she?” 

He wetted his lips, fingers twitching around his cigarette. “Not good.”

“Francis said that she isn’t eating.”

“I can count her ribs with my hands when I hold her.” He mumbled, glancing at the drawn curtains that hide the outside world from view. 

“After what Luca did to her, I can’t say that I’m surprised that she’s broken down. Took you right down along with her.”

He bristled. “It’s not her fault–”

“That’s not what I mean,” Polly shook her head. “What I mean is that, if she hadn’t fallen into the dark abyss, she would have been able to keep you from spiraling as well. Like she has before. You’re right. It’s not her fault. It was just shit timing, is all.”

“I don’t know how to pull her out of it, Pol.”

Polly fiddled with her fingers. “I think it’s time you both came back to work. Rattling around idly in here is clearly helping no one. Having something to focus your minds on will help.”

He nodded slowly, heaving out a breath. Polly stayed to talk for a little while longer, offering a few more sage words of advice before gathering up her things and leaving. After she was gone, Tommy spent a long stretch of time sitting and staring at nothing, the cogs in his head starting to slowly spin. 

Jamming his cigarette into the ashtray, he stood, making his way to the stairs and towards the bedroom that he shared with Lucy. 

She was already curled up under the covers, on her side with her hands pressed flat onto the pillow and her cheek resting atop them. Asher was laying in his dog bed in the corner, his big head on his paws, eyes watching them worriedly. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, Tommy reached out a hand to rub across Lucy’s forearm. Her eyes opened slowly, head cocking against the pillows.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” he moved his hand to stroke her face.

“How did it go?”

“Fine. She thinks we ought to go back to work.”

“Mm,” Lucy sat up slightly. “Probably not the worst idea.” 

“Mhm,” he moved his hand to play with her fingers, tracing the places where she’d picked a layer of skin away while nervously fidgeting. The nervous habit had thankfully mostly ceased since they’d gotten her a replacement set of rings for the ones Luca had taken from her. It was not until Tommy had first noticed the little scabs on her fingers that he realized the importance of her having something physical to busy her hands with. Otherwise she started picking at herself.

“You’re scaring me, love,” he said, doing his best to keep his tone gentle and non-accusatory. And yet still Lucy’s lower lip started to tremble, tears filling her eyes. 

“I know,” she whispered. “I know; I’m sorry. I…” her chest rose and fell deeply with her breaths. “I don’t know how to make it stop.”

“Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault,” his fingers curled loosely around her wrist. “We’ve both fallen apart these past few months.” He looked at her regretfully. “I’ve done a shit job at taking care of you.”

Lucy frowned, sitting up fully, reaching out to cup the side of his face. “That’s not true. You’ve kept me alive.”

“I think that’s the very definition of the bare minimum, love.”

She shook her head. “With where my mind has been at sometimes, Tommy, it’s no small thing that you’ve managed.”

He let her words sink in, both hands raising to take her face between his palms. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

She gave him a weak, not wholly convinced smile, and he kissed her insistently. 

“I mean it. I love you.” Forehead laying on hers, he breathed in the scent of rose perfume that lingered on her skin. “We’ll get through this.”

“I love you too,” she whispered, angling her head up to kiss him again. Tommy trailed his hands carefully down her body, skimming them along the curves of her breasts, lowering to loosely hold her waist.

They’d had sex since the doctor deemed her fully healed. But he still felt the need to handle her as gently as possible; too worried about accidentally hurting her. The first time, he’d spent over an hour worshiping her body, placing kisses to each and every one of her scars, taking his time to make it clear that he still found her as heart-stopping beautiful as he did the first day that he saw her.  

He took the same care now, delicately undoing the ties on her nightgown and sliding it off of her shoulders, lips pressing into her soft skin, following the raised lines of her scars. A groan left his throat when her fingertips sank into his hair, massaging his scalp when he dropped his head to take one of her nipples into his mouth.

That grip on his hair only tightened deliciously as he advanced lower, laying her down on the bed and spreading her legs so that he could lay between them, nosing at her cunt, breathing in her delectable scent before leaning forward to swipe his tongue across her clit. 

Her sounds were so pretty as he ate her out, the hand in his hair helping to steer him to where she needed him most. Watching her through his lashes, Tommy had to stifle a smirk at the way her head fell back against the pillows when he sank a finger into her, crooking it so he was rubbing right up against the spot that made her moans go up a pitch. 

When she came on his mouth, he grabbed greedily at her thighs, lips parting in an attempt to drink her all in, begging for everything she had to offer him. 

“Fuck, come here,” she half pleaded when he raised up on his arms above her, reaching out to drag him closer, slotting their mouths together with her release still clinging to his lips. Her hands pulled at his clothes, his own moving eagerly to help her to remove them, covering her body with his once he was bare. 

“Ready?” he asked, hand wrapping loosely around his engorged cock, giving himself a few pumps before lining up. 

“Yes. Yes,” she chanted, arms winding around his neck. He entered her slowly, watching her face carefully for any sign of discomfort while he pushed forward. The warm embrace of her cunt remained to be like nothing else he’d ever experienced before, her walls hugging around him, so tight and perfect there was to be no doubt that they’d been made for each other. 

The combined sounds of their pleasure echoed throughout the room as they started to move. Lucy’s head tipped forward, burying in his neck, her soft lips brushing against the sensitive skin. His eyes rolled in his head everytime she squeezed around him, and he slipped an arm under her to rest between her shoulder blades while he rocked into her steadily. He kept his thrusts at an even, gentle pace, taking care to go slow with her. She knew that she could stop him at any time if she needed, and no matter how lost he may have been in his own pleasure, he always took care to be mindful of her reactions to his movements, on alert for any indications of pain, discomfort, or fear. 

“Tommy–” her nails scratched at his shoulder, not enough to break the skin, but just enough to sting. His hissed at the contact, the idea of being marked by her sending a thrill through him that had his cock twitching inside her. 

“Just like that,” she whispered when his tip brushed against her g-spot. “Just like that; don’t stop.”

He grunted deeply, doing as instructed, feeling a surge in his balls as his own release drew nearer. Slotting a hand between them, he started to work on her clit again, rubbing it in small circles carefully timed with his deep thrusts. Her walls squeezed around him, even tighter than before, and he had to grit his teeth and focus hard to keep from coming prematurely.

With a cry and a tightening of her legs around his waist, Lucy came, a hand at the back of his head guiding him in for another kiss while she squeezed and gushed around his sensitive cock. Tommy moaned into her mouth, following her right over the cliff, stilling as he came deeply into her. His mouth continued to work, kissing her slowly and sensually as they rode out their climaxes and steadily started to come down.        

After, when they were laying together in the dark, Lucy in his arms with her head on his chest and her fingers tracing the lines of the tattoo of her name that he had emblazoned on his forearm, he began to tell her of the new plan that had started to take shape within his mind. 

“Lucy, do you remember when you asked me if I’d ever thought about entering politics?”

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[heartfullofleeches]

Poor reader definitely kisses the worshipper god on the cheek after. The next day their cockroach filled apartment is a mansion with all owning rights belonging to reader. Do not think about what happend to the landlord.

"Thank you for meeting with me.."

You sit at a booth at your old job; hooded figure across the table. You were taking a little time off from working thanks to their gift. You were able to fix up things in your shitty apartment and do some nice things for yourself. There was still a lot left over all that, but you just weren't ready to do any major changes just yet.

The deity slightly nods their head. "It is I who should be thanking you."

Though they've shown themselves to you before, it's still overwhelming for them to be near you. You look alot happier than the last time they saw you, and it makes them feel warm inside. Despite your happiness being theirs, you feel bad for giving them nothing in return.

"Are you sure there's nothing you want from me?"

"Yes, your well-being is all I care about. To hear that you appreciate what I've done is thanks enough... But if you'd really like to thank me-." Their voice trails off as they think; quickly snapping away from wondering thoughts. No, I'm not worthy anything more. Maybe a word of praise if you're willing? Or..."

You get up from your seat. They make it sound like such a small thing. If they really worship you as much as they seem to, what you do next should be enough to let you sleep at night. You pull back the hood of their jacket and kiss their cheek. It's super warm and has a strange fuzzy feeling like touching the screen of a tv.

"Ah-" The deity breaks out in a full body blush - literally. A darkening of their cheeks that spreads all over in a mix of pink and dark blues. Their human form slips; the left half of their face cast in a vibrant light as the skin unravels. They quickly cover it with their hands; forcing their inner self back in. Its sp hard to focus. Your lips on them - kissing them. They're so soft. They imagine this is what heaven would feel like to those who believe in it. Your eyes had been shut in the brief moment this all occurred.

"Will that do?"

The deity looks at you with a shaky grin. "Aha, yes, that works nicely. Too nice, if I'm allowed to give my thoughts. Please excuse me."

The God stands and leaves the diner, leaving money behind for the bill. You see them hurry across the street still holding their face - almost tripping over a garbage can in the process. You finish up your meal and decide its fine to turn in for the day.

-

Pulling into your street; your jaw falls flat on the steering well. Your crappy apartment and the buildings around it had been merged into a full acre mansion. You check the street number, but it's the same you've lived at for years. A key fob you don't remember having opens the locked gates and you head inside.

There no doubt in your mind that this was somehow your place of residence as you unlock the door with your old key. All of your old belongings are placed nearly around the general area plus some fine furniture and art pieces to round out the space. You find a note on a table.

"Dearest Grace,

I apologize for the abrupt change in your residency. It appears I am not as in control of my powers as I thought and they acted on my desire to please you. Do not worry about your old neighbors. Their lives have been rewritten elsewhere I imagine and they are well. I hope that it's to your liking.

Forever yours, ☆"

You set the note back on the table. The course of events suddenly had you feeling drained. You lay out on the couch, falling asleep on the most comfortable couch pillow you've ever felt.