#They're all I can think about right now sorry

[norikuna]

♩ (mdni) abstract — semi-public sex, in a library, fwb, canon!gojo x afab!reader

fwb!gojo satoru who's the cockiest man that you've ever seen. sure he's the strongest sorcerer of the modern day and age. and he's a good teacher to his students. but he doesn't give a fuck about deadlines, or being a decent coworker, or being polite and quiet in the staffroom — and it's enough to send you up the wall.

he also doesn't give a fuck about being quiet when he's drilling his solid inches into you. gojo clearly doesn't care for noise when he's got bruising fingertips pressed into your hips. when he's got your staff uniform pulled to the side so the fat tip of his cock can slap thick wisps of pre against your clit.

"ya' can feel that right, sweets," gojo's chuckling, teasing and so full of himself as he sees you sink your teeth into your lower lip, trying to keep your whines quiet, huffing and snapping at the shell of his ear.

"y'know we hafta' be quiet, right, mmph — satoru!" you don't get to finish admonishing him because he swallows your concerns in a messy kiss, all clashing teeth and tongue as he slowly pushes his fat tip past your glossy, winking entrance.

and what a sight, to know that this is how you can undo the most powerful man to walk the earth, to see his pale-pink lips drop open as his blue eyes glaze over. to know that he's losing himself in the tight heat of your pretty cunt, and he's not even halfway in yet.

"s-sorry, what was that, sweets?" he's gasping into the crook of your neck, a large hand on your thigh, manoeuvring your leg wider so he can slot his frame in between your legs, "didn't quite catch t-that, woah. it's like she's got magical powers or something." all sleazy grins and bashful smirks as he pats at the mound of your groin, right where his own hips are now tacked to yours, glistening.

"charming, satoru," you breathe out, trying not to let on that you're just as affected as he is, "b-but the students, they're gonna — hnngh," your words are cut off as he bottoms out with a slick pop! but you're never one to give up, digging your nails into the nape of his neck, pulling him closer. you thread your fingers into the soft hairs of his undercut, letting satoru practically purr above you, "they could walk in any minute, don'tcha think?"

it's clear that it's not a pressing concern to gojo right now, because he just suddenly leans back, rolling his hips slowly into yours so each angry and thick vein must be swabbing your insides, "ya' think too much, sweets. there's, hah, none on campus right n-now," and he bestows a shiny, spit-slick kiss upon your waiting lips again, "it's just you and me, ohhh — and her 'course."

you respond with a strong clench of your gummy walls around his cock, and the hand that wasn't holding your thigh up ends up slamming down hard on the oaken desk, sending books and stray papers to the floor as he huffs, "w-whoops, yer' just takin' me in sooo good, fuck, i really needed this sweets, ya' got no idea. stupid higher ups got me run dry. and you looked s-so damn good in that meeting, couldn't focus," and he's babbling now, "couldn't focus and knew i had to sneak ya' back out here, get you on my cock."

you swipe a thumb over his candy lips, all mint and sugar, as you mewl in pleasure, having him batter your guts over and over so you're imprinted against his sculpted abdomen, "you gon' pull outta me if i make a stupid joke about me milking you dry?" and gojo snickers but it quickly turns into a breathy moan, "tch, ya' don't think that's w-what i want? always so good at doin' this. why don't ya' just let me take you out properly?"

[covenofagatha]

hiiii <33

Could you write something about Agatha being a little insecure about being older than the reader?

Maybe they're at a party and someone the reader's age is going to talk to her and Agatha feels jealous and a little insecure, but pretend not to feel anything?

Then they go home and the reader shows Agatha that she loves her more than anything :)

If it's not too much to ask, the reader could have an obsession with Agatha's breasts and... really like eating her out? (like, a *really* big obsession) (sorry, Mrs Fletcher is on my mind a lot lately)

sorry for the details, lol, this came to me in the middle of the night

and by the way, I love your writing <33 you write very well

and I'm looking forward to the but you are my stepmother update :D

kisseess <3

I may have changed the setting a little bit (I've been watching Succession and was influenced lol) but hopefully you like! Also, Mrs. Fletcher literally changed my life so I completely understand

I combined this one with another request for being obsessed with Agatha’s breasts

Happy New Year to everyone!

Glitter on the floor

When Agatha gets jealous at the company New Year's Eve party, you remind her that she has nothing to worry about

Word count: 4300

Warnings: oral sex, oral fixation, breast fixation, marking

“Do you think anyone would notice if we just leave before the party even starts?” You ask, throwing a stress ball up in the air and catching it without even looking. 

You’re laying on your back on the couch in Agatha’s office and she snorts from her seat at her desk. 

Unlike you, when Agatha said she was going up to her office to quickly read over a contract before the company New Year’s Eve party, she meant it. You had just followed her up here to see if she was willing to get up to any funny business. 

“You don’t think they would notice that the CEO and General Counsel of the company aren’t at the company party?” Agatha asks amusedly, sarcasm dripping from her tone. 

Spellbound Network is a multi-billion dollar news conglomerate that Agatha Harkness is the Chief Executive Officer of. She’s absolutely ruthless and doesn’t hesitate before tearing anybody and everybody down. Nothing will stand in her way of world domination. 

As General Counsel, you’re a little less important, but you know that Agatha is right. The last thing you need is people speculating. 

The two of you have been involved in a more than professional relationship for seven months now. It all started when you offered to stay late to help her finish up with some end-of-quarterly reviews before the deadline and the two of you had ended up going out for drinks when you had finally finished. Agatha had let her hair down and told you just how stressed she was, and you had stupidly told her that you could help her relieve some of that stress. 

She had raised an eyebrow and you had taken it as a challenge. The next thing you knew, she was calling a car and the two of you were making out in the backseat on the way to her penthouse. 

It had grown into a relationship, a relationship that no one else in the office knew about. Things were getting pretty serious, and Agatha had even brought up you moving in with her. 

But you roll your eyes anyway. “It’ll be boring,” you drag out the last word slowly, sitting up to face her. “Wouldn’t you rather go back to your place, or even just stay up here?” You give her an impish grin and a wink. 

It’s a lost cause. Agatha has never let you touch her nor has she touched you in the office. 

She fixes you with a glare. “If you’re not going to behave, you can go downstairs and help set up for the party.” 

You hum in acquiescence and you’re about to resume your position on your back when Agatha leans forward and props herself up on her elbows, pushing her visible cleavage together. 

Your mouth runs dry. She’s wearing a long black dress with a low neckline that puts her breasts — that you may or may not be obsessed with — very much on display. You wouldn’t be surprised if she did it to tease you. 

“Agatha,” you whine, trying to sound pathetic so she’ll take pity on you. You can practically taste her skin with how badly you want her. 

She knows what you’re thinking, as always. “Stop,” she says without even looking up from her desk. “You aren’t going to goad me into touching you. Hasn’t worked any other time, isn’t going to work now.” 

You pout. “What are you talking about? I’ve never tried to.” It’s a bold-faced lie and you both know it. 

“Oh yeah?” She asks, at last looking up at you. “So when you got me that vibrator for the Secret Santa at the Christmas party, ‘not realizing that it was a public gift swap’; that wasn’t an attempt to work me up? Or when you just happen to come in here almost every day and knock over my pens so you have to bend down and shake your ass in my face?” 

You can’t help but chuckle at the reminders of your brazenness. To be fair, you had genuinely thought that the Secret Santa swap would be done in a group but then the gifts would be opened alone. And much to your surprise, you were wrong and when Rio Vidal, the head of Human Resources, had announced that it was time for everyone to open their gifts, you had quickly dragged Agatha upstairs, making some excuse about a phone call about a breaking news story. 

She had been furious at almost having to open your gift in front of the entire staff, and instead of having a very Merry Christmas Eve, courtesy of your generous gift and a well-placed bribe to the person who had actually drawn Agatha in the swap, she hadn’t touched you at all that night. 

But Christmas Day was much better, when she had put you on your knees for almost an hour and you made her cum four times with just your mouth. 

“You’re not letting those go anytime soon, are you?” You mutter. 

She throws a paper clip at you. “Go downstairs and stop bothering me,” she orders, fondness still in her voice. 

You huff a big sigh, one that tells her that just because you’re obeying doesn’t mean you’re happy about it, and walk over to place the paper clip and stress ball back on her desk. You straighten out your own dress, a long maroon one, and lean over to press a chaste kiss to her lips. 

To your surprise, she lets you do it and she even deepens it, flicking her tongue against the entrance to your mouth. When she pulls away, her eyes are dark and you’re about to ask her to reconsider, but she ushers you away with her hand and turns back to the contract. 

There’s not very many people in the lobby where the party is taking place, so you stand alone at a table and accept a glass of champagne from a waitress. It’s only ten pm and you know most of the staff won’t get here until closer to midnight, which would’ve been smart. 

If only Agatha hadn’t insisted that you and her come in for the entire day and get ahead of all the stuff that’s coming up in the new year. She didn’t even let you go back to your apartment once you both had finished, instead letting you shower in her private adjoining bathroom. 

And she wonders why you’re already so bored; you’ve been at the office for fourteen hours. 

Still at least two more to go. 

You take another glass of champagne and set it down next to your already half-empty glass. You’re going to need it once more people start showing up. 

It’s not that you don’t like them, it’s just that…if the building was on fire, you’d only really think or care about saving Agatha. 

“Hey there, General Counsel,” Rio says, slinking up to you. 

You smile. She’s an oddball, but her wry sense of humor sometimes is the only thing that gets you through business trips. Besides Agatha, of course. 

And it’s not exactly a secret that she has a bit of a crush on you. On paper, it would make more sense than you and Agatha. Rio is your age, and for all intents and purposes, doesn’t have any power over you, nor you her. 

But you’re in love with Agatha, and older women have always been more your type anyway. You’re perfectly happy with being friends with Rio, and it seems that Rio is content with your relationship now too. 

“Hey, Rio,” you greet, lifting your glass in a silent toast to her. She lifts up the other one and smoothly downs it in one gulp. 

And then the elevator dings and Agatha steps out and you forget all about Rio and everyone else. Your eyes follow her as she glides through the lobby, not even looking at you once, and she picks up a plate of caviar while the Chief Financial Officer, Jimmy, goes to talk to her. 

Rio taps her fingers to the rim of the empty glass. “So, I heard Harkness is thinking about acquiring Hex Industries for better tech.” 

“Water cooler gossip,” you say dismissively, not wanting to talk anymore business for the day. You’ve done enough with that with Agatha. And then you lower your voice conspiratorially. “But I did hear that Jimmy got divorced again?” 

It sends Rio into a fit of giggles and the two of you swap the details you’ve heard from various people and try to piece together what really happened. It does make the party go by faster and before you know it, there’s only about an hour before midnight. 

You cannot wait to go home with Agatha and forget all about work and this party and just focus on her. Ever since she changed into the dress she’s wearing tonight, you haven’t been able to focus with how delicious her breasts look in it. 

Some might call it an oral fixation, some might call it mommy issues, but there’s no denying how much you love to suck on her nipples. And to eat her out. 

Fuck. You can’t be thinking about that. Rio is saying something, something now about Tony, the Chief Operating Officer, and you’re shifting your weight thinking about the sounds Agatha makes when you get your mouth on her. 

You look around the room and you find her, standing alone, nursing her own glass of champagne. But what startles you is that she’s already watching you with a strange look on her face. You give her a small smile, your heart filling with adoration for the older woman, but she looks away. 

“Will you excuse me for a second?” You say to Rio, who nods. You walk over to Agatha and slide up next to her, your hand brushing against her lower back. “You okay?” You murmur into her ear. 

Agatha clears her throat and rolls her shoulders back and you have to make a pointed effort not to stare at her boobs that get pushed forward. “Just ready for this party to be over,” she says, voice clipped. 

“Oh yeah?” You whisper, cocking an eyebrow. “What do you have planned for when we get home?” 

She looks at you, finally looks at you, and you can see a guarded look in her eye. “We’ve had a long day, and this party won’t be done until after midnight. I’ll probably turn in.” 

“Oh, Mommy, your age is showing,” you tease mockingly in a hush, wearing a dramatic pout, another joke about how much older she is that she usually rolls her eyes at and then makes a comment about how much you like it.  

But she stiffens today. “Well, you’re more than welcome to go home with Rio if you want someone your own age.” The retort hits you like a punch in the gut and you’re left dumbfounded as she walks away, heels clacking on the floor. 

Is she…jealous? Surely Agatha can’t be, she knows how much you want her and love her. She knows how willing you are to show her. 

And maybe, just maybe, she’ll let you remind her right now. 

You check your watch. Forty-five minutes until midnight. You can feel her gaze from across the room, but when you try to make eye contact, she pretends like she isn’t looking at you, and you make the executive decision to try something that will probably backfire. 

Pulling out your phone, you pretend to take a call. You can feel her air shift; she knows that if someone’s calling you this late, it must be something urgent. You nod like you’re listening and then after a minute or two, you put your phone down. 

You meet her eyes and tilt your head toward the elevator, your heart beating rapidly in your chest. This could backfire. She could get so mad at you. 

But you have to try. 

Agatha excuses herself from the small group of people that have congregated around her table and she follows you into the elevator. 

“Who was that? What’s wrong?” She demands, and you almost feel bad for making her this panicked. 

You shake your head. “Just wait until we get to your office.” You think it should be a hint, but she doesn’t pick up on it. Instead, Agatha chews on her bottom lip and tosses her hair back over her shoulders. 

The doors ding open on the sixtieth floor and Agatha trails behind you, hot on your heels, as you take her to her office. You tell her to get on the couch while you draw the blinds to the glass windows facing the interior of the building, just in case anyone should happen to walk by. The television is on outside in the hallway and you can faintly hear the sounds of the New York Ball Drop show. A little over thirty minutes left. 

“What is going on?” Agatha asks again, clearly exasperated by you dragging this out. 

You turn around and almost moan at the sight of her sitting with her knees pulled up under her and her elbow propped up on the couch. This time, you really can’t help your gaze from darting down to her breasts and she snaps her fingers to get you to focus. “Rio’s just a friend,” you say bluntly, and Agatha scoffs. 

“What does this have to do with anything?” 

You slowly walk over and kneel down in front of her, pulling her legs out so that her feet are on the floor and you rest your chin on her knee and look up at her through your eyelashes. “There wasn’t a call,” you confess, already wincing on the inside at how she’s going to react. Her face remains stoic. “You were bothered by Rio and I talking.” It’s a statement, not a question. 

But Agatha jeers. “Is this your excellent counsel that I pay you so much for? That I’m bothered? Don’t think I don’t know about the little crush she has on you.” 

“So what if she has a crush? I don’t like her like that. You know I only have eyes for you,” you say, slowly inching the hem of her dress up her legs, waiting to be rejected. 

Her hand slides up your head and fastens into your hair, tilting you back so you can look straight at her. “Oh yeah?” She asks, daring, challenging you to go further. 

 You swallow hard. “Let me show you?” You offer timidly, praying it’s the right answer and you’re not reading this wrong. 

Agatha growls, a guttural noise deep in her throat, and she yanks you up and kisses you, nipping at your bottom lip. Her tongue forces its way into your mouth and you moan at the feeling, settling into her lap with your legs on either side of hers. She tugs at your hair and the sting makes you keen, only making you need her more. 

You can’t even wait, you’ve been on edge for too long, and you trail your lips down her neck, scrape your teeth against her collarbone, and then she helps you take the straps of her dress off. 

The second her breasts are free, you’re on them like you’re starving and they’re your salvation. You cup both of them with your hands, feeling the sturdy weight of them, and you knead softly, running your thumbs over both nipples. The dusky rose color stands out against her pale skin and you watch with fascination as her nipples harden under your gentle touch. Part of you still can’t believe she’s letting you touch her in the office. 

Not that you’re complaining. 

You swoop down and take one into your mouth, swirling your tongue around the little bud, and Agatha’s back arches off the couch as her fingers dig into your hair to keep you there. You’ve never felt more content in your life than like this, and you happily suck on her as the most delicious sounding noises fall out of her mouth. 

Her free hand finds your hip just as your fingers tug at her nipple that isn’t being occupied by your mouth and you can make out what she wants. Without moving away from her, you shift and place a leg in-between hers, able to feel the heat radiating from her pussy through her underwear and dress. 

“Fuck,” you mutter brokenly when she grinds up against your knee and you can feel just how wet she is. 

Agatha huffs out a chuckle. “You love sucking on Mommy’s tits so much, don’t you?” She asks and you switch sides and hum against her skin. “Mommy loves it, too.” 

You groan and take a break from directly stimulating her, instead, opting to lightly bite at the skin around her nipples, taking extra care to mark the curvature under them. She’s especially sensitive there, and her little gasps only spur you on. 

After you’ve left sufficient proof that you were there, you pull back and admire your work and you sharply inhale. Her breasts are absolutely painted with red marks that will surely fade into bruises by tomorrow and her chest heaves, a ragged look in her eyes. Agatha is still undulating against your leg and you can visibly tell how turned on she is. 

“Am I convincing you yet?” You ask, your voice coming out a little hoarse, and Agatha barks out a laugh. 

Her wicked grin has a thrill running inside you and she shifts underneath you until you figure out what she is trying to do. It’s a bit awkward, but she manages to turn her body so that her legs are on the couch horizontally but you’re still on top of her. 

She hums thoughtfully. “Think I might need a little more. If you’re willing, that is.” 

Only too willing. You can’t help yourself from leaning down and giving her a hard kiss, pulling away and sucking one nipple and then the other roughly until she moans, and then you move down her body and bunch up her dress at her hips. You put your hands on her shins and guide her legs up so they’re bent, her heels on the couch. 

And then you settle between her open legs and mouth at her sopping cunt through her underwear. A groan tears out of you before you can stop it at tasting the wet fabric, thick with her scent which you’ve become addicted to. You suck on her underwear, pulling the moisture out of it, and Agatha jerks underneath you. 

“We don’t have all day, pet,” she says tightly and you can hear the television outside saying there’s fifteen minutes left until New Year’s Day. 

You chuckle at her impatience and finally pull down her underwear. You wish your dress had pockets so you could store it for later, but you made do for just throwing it somewhere in her office. 

And then you drag your tongue up her slit and absolutely lose yourself in the taste. There’s something so indistinguishable and indescribable about it, and you lazily explore her pussy, getting as much of her wetness as you can into your mouth. You vaguely realize that she’s wrapped a leg over your shoulder and her heel is digging in, the sting only turning you on more. 

Small gasps are pulled out of Agatha’s mouth and her hips buck, trying to get more stimulation, but to no avail as you are completely focused on just licking her slowly. You moan into her and the vibrations make her whimper, but you almost don’t even hear it. This is your favorite place on earth, between her legs, and you don’t want to ever leave. She’s so warm and wet and responsive against your tongue and you fucking love it. Love getting her wetness all over your face, love feeling her clench around your tongue, love the taste and smell and how she reacts when you lap at her clit. 

You do that now, and her thighs tighten around your head and she sighs like she’s finally getting some of the relief that she needs. 

“I love your pussy,” you say, but the words are garbled. She lets out a muffled sound and you look up through hooded eyes to see her head strewn back in pleasure, dark hair fanned out beneath her, bottom lip between her teeth, and her fingers tweaking her raw nipples. The sight makes you moan against her again and her hips jump. 

She looks down to meet your gaze and you feel the fire inside you only being stoked more when you realize that almost all the blue in her eyes is gone, entirely swallowed up by dark desire. “Please,” she begs, sounding more needy than she ever has since you’ve started sleeping with her. “Mommy needs this so bad.” 

And the only thing you love more than tasting her with your mouth is making her cum with your mouth. 

So you oblige, thrusting your tongue inside her and almost losing all composure when her walls flutter around it. She lets out a loud whine when your nose brushes against her clit and you keep doing that, curling your tongue inside her and moving your head up and down so she can get some desperately needed stimulation to her clit. 

“Fuck, baby, your mouth is so good,” she practically sobs, and you can feel her throb. She never takes long, which is almost a shame because you’d stay between her legs forever if you could. Building her up, feeling her legs tremble around you, that’s half the fun right there. 

But she needs it, and you can hear that it’s getting closer to midnight. Only a few minutes left. 

You double the intensity, dragging your tongue over her clit again and again, feeling it pulse. You slip a hand between your own legs and groan at the wetness you find, fingers strumming at your own clit through your dress and soaked panties. Nothing gets you more turned on than Agatha’s pussy in your mouth, absolutely coating your face. 

She’s pinching her nipples now and you almost lose your rhythm from wishing you were the one doing that to her, but you don’t falter. Wetness is dripping out of her cunt onto the couch below and you almost smirk at the thought of seeing the stain tomorrow.  

Agatha better let you fuck her in her office more often. You clench at the thought of being under her desk, eating her out while she’s going through contracts or in a meeting or having lunch. Anytime you can. 

“Fuck, fuck, baby,” she chants and you can hear the minute countdown start. You lick and suck and nip and her hips are moving furiously, grinding on your face and you can’t breathe but you don’t even care because she tastes so fucking good. 

“Five…four…” You shove your tongue inside her and curl it up, stroking against the spongy spot that makes her gasp. “Three..two…” You scrape your teeth against her clit and she keens. “One…Happy New Year!” 

You suck her clit into your mouth hard and that does it. She goes flying over the edge, wetness gushing out onto your face, and you blissfully lick her through her orgasm, not even realizing that she’s too sensitive until she’s tugging at your hair, pulling you away from her. 

She brings you in for a kiss, a tradition when the clock strikes midnight on January First, but also something she always does when you eat her out, moaning at the taste of herself on your lips, and you don’t even care that you haven’t cum yet. You clasp her cheeks and your tongue sweeps into her mouth until you finally have to break apart to breathe. 

“What a way to start the new year,” you joke and she laughs and fluffs her hair. She looks like a thoroughly-fucked mess, but also the hottest you’ve ever seen. You soften and press a gentle kiss to her lips. “You know I love you, right? I don’t care about how old you are, you know I fucking love that. You don’t have to worry about Rio, or anyone else, no matter if they’re my age or not. I want you and only you.” 

Agatha smiles and kisses you again, and then kisses your nose. “I want all your midnight kisses, baby. I love you too.” It’s the most romantic thing she’s ever said. 

And of course you immediately have to ruin it with a joke. “Office sex isn’t that bad, hm?” She pokes your side and you giggle. 

“Let’s get back downstairs before anyone notices that we’ve been gone for so long,” she says. 

You whine but reluctantly get off her when she pats your hips and she finds her underwear that was thrown to the ground. You both fix your make-up in the mirror and then you’re back in the elevator, descending the sixty floors. If anyone asks, you’ll say it was an emergency with an acquisition. But you doubt anyone will. The champagne is flowing and it’s a party. 

Before the doors open, Agatha takes your hand, squeezes it three times as if to say I love you and then there’s a ding and it’s back to reality. 

But she gives you a wink meant only for you when she toasts to the company and all the good things yet to come and a warm feeling fills you. 

What a way to start the new year, indeed. 

[tanadrin]

Sorry about the long ask, but what do you think about this claim: i often see marxists (and adjacent groups, blah blah) say that the united states (empire) is about to collapse or is gradually declining, something along those lines, and specifically with regard to its economy, military and ideology. For example, i was watching a video hosting Richard Wolff, and he claimed that the united states is being replaced by china as the global superpower; he compares the situation to the historical rise of the united states relative to the british empire that slowly took place in the 19th and 20th centuries. I think his comparison is slightly flawed (imo hes comparing apples to oranges here), but in the broad strokes he might be right? I also remember seeing a pretty respectable maoist on here claim the us military is failing. Idk, i would like to hear your take

This answer got real long, so I added a cut. The short version is "people who say things like this are living in a fantasy land, and you can safely ignore their opinions on anything else as a result."

The United States is not the USSR in 1990 or Somalia in 1994 or Rome in the fifth century, or anything similar. Failed states are absolutely a thing, and they're fascinating (and often quite depressing!) historical case studies, and the United States looks nothing like a failed state. It's not even about to collapse in the sense of "suffer a prolonged period of sharp economic decline that forces it to drastically reduce its presence in the wider world and curtails its power in influence." It's not even about to collapse in the sense of "experience significant regime change." The U.S. economy is, overall, doing quite well. There is no significant popular unrest. There is no elite appetite for revolution. There are not competing centers of power that would rather see the status quo burned to the ground than their rivals get power. You might want the U.S. to collapse, and you might not, but the idea it is about to is pure fantasy.

I think before we get to any other specific claims about the United States' position relative to other countries, it's important to note that claims of impending American collapse are, like claims of impending civilizational collapse or Paul Ehrlich's claim of worldwide hunger or breathless claims that the war in Ukraine is going to escalate into WW3 any day now, IMO affective claims about how the speaker feels about the world: there is a certain class of person who, whether out of nihilistic glee, hope of revolutionary change, or simply untrammeled anxiety sees the signs of collapse all around them, Doom-Is-Nigh streetcorner prophets who are emotionally invested in the idea of collapse, for whom the idea of collapse would often justify some pillar of their politics. If, after all, the US is a failed state about to be toppled by its own decadence, this would justify their inordinate degree of contempt for the US.

On another recent post someone phrased claims like this as often being more about "what would be necessary for someone's politics to be justified," and I think that's an important part of it! In fact I think "affective claims about the world being distorted into factual claims about the world bc they are what would be necessary to justify someone's politics" is a fully general phenomenon, regardless of political orientation. There are much milder forms of it than out-and-out doomerism, though of course the absurdity of doomerist claims to this degree make it really hard to take someone's claims about the state of the world seriously.

About the specific claims here:

Re: China: China has experienced terrific growth since the end of WW2, and that's great! A country of over a billion people should by any reasonable metric be one of the largest economies on Earth, and China is, it seems, taking its inevitable place internationally as an economic powerhouse. It's a big country with a ton of people, and it's terrific that it has been able to lift so many people out of the grinding poverty that prevailed throughout much of the country in the 20th century. But like a lot of middle-income countries it seems to be having a ton of trouble, for significant institutional reasons, transitioning from an industrialization-focused economy to one driven by consumer demand and consumer spending. AIUI (and I am so, so far from an expert; mostly I just read what folks like @argumate post from other sources), China has a lot of debt dragging down its economy, and weak consumer demand. China is still much poorer than the United States on a per capita basis, and though it has a large military, is much less capable of projecting its power beyond its borders. It has aspired to increase its economic and diplomatic influence through the Belt and Road initiative, but returns on this project have been decidedly mixed, and China's military and strategic focus remains decidedly confined to its neighborhood. It wants to absorb Taiwan and protect its interests in the South China Sea, and prop up North Korea and such, but it's not able to or interested in, like, fielding large carrier groups that routinely sail up and down the world's oceans or conduct invasions of distant countries like the U.S. is able to. N.B., I'm not saying those invasions are good, just that the U.S. can historically, if it wants, invade and occupy basically any small-to-medium sized country on the planet in a few weeks, and that's not the kind of capability China has, or--AFAICT--is interested in developing.

The British Empire comparison is also, I think, very misleading, and gets at something I find frustrating about a lot of modern Marxists: they want to fit everything into the model of 19th century capitalist imperialism, when the modern global system doesn't look too much like that anymore. Mostly countries like the United States, if they have economic interests in a country, don't invade and reduce the country to a status of colony to extract raw resources from. The Cold War supported a fair bit of regime change in the service of commercial interests, even in the aftermath of post-WW2 decolonization, but nowadays the tools used to develop and enforce the international order preferred by the Status Quo Coalition (which is led, but not commanded by the United States) are much more indirect. They don't involve directly administering colonies, which is significant because colonialism is, for the states that run it, expensive as hell. Sure, it's great for commercial interests--but it's often more a drain on state finances than anything else. I have come around to the view that colonialism was as much an expression of wealth as it was a means to acquire more. Britain was always a small-but-wealthy island country whose empire was much, much larger than its metropole. The vast majority of the population and wealth controlled by the United States is within the fifty states which comprise the core territory of the United States. This isn't Britain with a far-flung overseas empire which is expensive to administer and a minority of Britons on the island itself--this is a country whose wealth and industry is built on a population of 350 million or so which identifies as American first, which speaks English and votes for President and congress. Most of the United States' actual imperial possessions are tiny archipelagoes these days that are economically marginal, or else military bases overseas--these do not generate American wealth and power, they are expressions of it. For the United States to collapse like the British Empire did, it would have to lose control of California and Texas and the Midwest or something like that--which is a goofy-ass fantasy, because if the United States federal government disappeared tomorrow, I think the vast majority of the 350 million or so people living in the present borders of the United States would support re-establishing the United States federal government. Americans like and support the country they live in! This is very different from the subjects of the British Raj, or even the people of Australia and Canada, who had begun to develop their own identity (and thanks to distance from the metropole, completely divergent economic and political interests).

"The U.S. is an empire analogous Britain" is only true if you squint from very far away and don't care about the specifics of history, economics, or politics. But I think again the way to understand this claim is partly affective. If the U.S. really is the second incarnation of the British Empire, then you can cast a lot of disparate conflicts that otherwise don't fit the mold under the aegis of a broad anti-colonial struggle. It also facilitates a certain sort of base campism that some people love to indulge in--the NATO-is-always-evil-so-anything-NATO-doesn't-like-is-good angle, which has a lot of self-described leftists backing in to saying that Putin's Russia is somehow an antifascist or anticolonial force for good in the world.

"The U.S. military is failing" is pure cope. There's no country or active coalition of countries that's even remotely close to the U.S. military in capabilities. Though there is always going to be a stream of waste and corruption and medium-sized bureaucratic fuckups streaming out of the U.S. military, it remains without peer simply by virtue of one of the largest economies on the planet being willing to spend like 4% of its GDP on military stuff. The EU or China might in some counterfactual world be able to field a similar military if they spent a comparable amount, and had similar strategic aims, but they won't and they don't, so unless U.S. foreign policy drastically changes and military spending is slashed as a result, I don't see that changing at any time in the near future.

[mirrorball-leclerc]

karma - part eleven

series masterlist

mark webber you people weren't being serious about the marriage thing were you?

oscar piastri-leclerc why? jealous? mark webber you are spending way too much time with aurora aurora button excuse me? he was this way when we found him oscar piastri-leclerc FOUND ME?! I'M NOT A STRAY DOG AURORA! aurora button i don't know where they found you

natalia leclerc wedding preparations are going great mark, thanks for asking

kimi raïkkönen who's getting married?

max verstappen fernando and santiago kimi raïkkönen oh, i didn't know they were in love. oh congrats 🌈 logan sargeant-leclerc i don't know if i should laugh...

liam lawson wait, so that wasn't a joke?

yuki tsunoda-leclerc no liam, that wasn't a joke

oscar piastri-leclerc WHEN DID YUKI BECOME A LECLERC?! natalia leclerc we adopted him last week. he brings me delicious food. logan sargeant-leclerc damn, he stole your mum and your grid mum

fernando alonso i would look radiant in a dress would i not?

santiago ruiz the second best bride out there amor fernando alonso WHO THE FUCK IS THE FIRST? santiago ruiz i'm sorry my love, but my daughter fernando alonso well you're not wrong natalia leclerc i'm crying

ben santos-ruiz can't wait until mom is calling dad about this.

mark webber yes, where is your wife in all of this? santiago ruiz fuck if i know and it's ex-wife, we're divorced

daniel ricciardo wedding of the century. do i get to be best man?

jenson button fuck off we all know that's going to me

ollie bearman-leclerc do i get to be flower boy?

pato o'ward-leclerc you're ring BEARer ollie bearman-leclerc that was a horrible pun aurora button i thought it was great ollie bearman-leclerc oh my god, you're so right, it's the best pun ever jenson button what the fuck is this? liam lawson isn't it obvious?

aurora button i'm flower girl right, with kimi?

jenson button since when are you friends with kimi antonelli? aurora button even since our super top secret mission against ferrari logan sargeant-leclerc oh my god what the fuck did you do? ollie bearman-leclerc the less you know the better. aurora button the less likely you are to end up being sued over what we did

lewis hamilton what the fuck did i miss?

mark webber finally someone with some common sense around here. tell them they're being stupid. lewis hamilton well that depends, what are they planning on doing? santiago ruiz fernando and i are getting married to mess with the sainz family lewis hamilton can i be best man? santiago ruiz if you agree this isn't a stupid idea and it's one of our best yet, then yes, you can be my best man. lewis hamilton deal, this isn't a stupid idea. mark webber WHAT THE FUCK?

ben santos-ruiz all of you are lacking several brain cells

george russell why did i just get a wedding invite via email to a wedding between natalia's dad and fernando?

lando norris i got one too

alex albon so did i, can someone please explain to me what the fuck is happening right now?

pierre gasly charles, what the fuck are you guys doing?

charles leclerc why do you think i'm planning something? they're in love calmar, let them get married max verstappen yeah pierre, let them be happy together. i didn’t take you for a homophobe pierre. pierre gasly do not start that shit back up again verstappen, the rumors just stopped.

esteban ocon i wasn't aware fernando also liked men

lance stroll just look at the tension he's had with jenson and mark

lando norris have those two always been here?

daniel ricciardo i'm also here, for the record

logan sargeant-leclerc does he not know that this is the unofficial grid group chat?

oscar piastri-leclerc mate, i don't think he's realized it.

george russell WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON WITH NATALIA'S DAD AND FERNANDO?

lewis hamilton fernando and santiago are getting married to piss off the sainz family. liam lawson which i thought that they were joking about but turns out they're being very much serious about it.

yuki tsunoda-leclerc i think it's a fantastic idea!

oscar piastri-leclerc stop coming for my title of favorite child yuki! logan sargeant-leclerc we all know leo is favorite followed by ollie. yuki tsunoda-leclerc i stole your mum and now i'm stealing your grid mum charles leclerc i feel like i should do something about this but i'm helping my wife plan a wedding

lance stroll DO I GET TO BE A GROOMSMEN??

max verstappen ask nando lance stroll HE SAID YES!

daniel ricciardo seb just texted me saying he's officiating the wedding.

lando norris you people are going too far for the bit

max verstappen don't you dare tell carlos or i'll take you out next race

lando norris my lips are sealed.

oscar piastri-leclerc don't worry, i'll have aurora threaten him

logan sargeant-leclerc just heard lando's girly scream

pierre gasly you people are afraid of a pipsqueak?

alex albon say what you will but aurora is a small ball of fury much like yuki logan sargeant-leclerc she's terrifying mate yuki tsunoda-leclerc i like her, she gets me

natalia_leclerc, francesca.cgomes, and aurorabutton added new stories

aurora has not let go of leo since we got here, now he wants my ice cream...how do i tell him no? everything is so tiny and adorable 🥺 i will never again agree to go out with both kika and nat, this is the third 'errand' we've ran today because of our super top secret mission.

liam lawson genuine question, what gender are baby leclercs going to be?

natalia ruiz there's a bet going on that it's going to be girls but i'm like 83% certain that it's going to be a girl and a boy. yuki tsunoda-leclerc who are we to argue with momma leclerc? natalia ruiz yuki, you might just be my favorite person today

max verstappen damn yuki really is coming for that favorite child title

natalia ruiz i don't have a favorite child but if i did it would be whoever brought me more stroopwafels right now

ollie bearman I'M ON MY WAY! oscar piastri-leclerc OLLIE STOP IT! I'M ON MY WAY!

pato o'ward-leclerc if you see me in max's apartment, no you didn't.

max verstappen HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET INTO MY APARTMENT? pato o'ward-leclerc penelope let me in, after kelly said it was okay

aurora button jokes on you guys, i broke into lando's apartment, it's much closer

jenson button SINCE WHEN ARE YOU A LECLERC? aurora button my plan is to marry into the family. i still don't know how i'm going to achieve that. maybe i'll marry ollie or logan

logan sargeant-leclerc no thanks, you can marry ollie.

logan sargeant-leclerc he just let out an unholy screech

fernando alonso oh i get it now mark webber there was something to get from that?

lewis hamilton when's the wedding?

natalia ruiz this sunday, clear your schedules

ben santos-ruiz at what point have we gone too far for the bit?

santiago ruiz not yet

sebastian vettel just got ordained, this is going to be great!!

mark webber this is going to be a disaster

alex albon WHY MUST I BE FORSAKEN?! WHY MUST I SUFFER?! WHY DO I HAVE TO BE THEIR NEXT VICTIM?! WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE?

max verstappen what the fuck is wrong with him

aurora button have you seen the announcement? on the f1 twitter page?

max verstappen twitter doesn't exist anymore aurora it's x now

aurora button i refuse to call it fucking x

logan sargeant-leclerc all my homies hate the sainz family

charles leclerc why does this group even exist?

aurora button because we all hate the sainz family, duh?

natalia leclerc you okay logan?

logan sargeant-leclerc it's not like james it a secret that he was looking for my replacement

alex albon LOGAN! ARE YOU OKAY?!

logan sargeant-leclerc i could be better but it helps that i'm staying with osc

alex albon MAX, YOUR ASS BETTER RETIRE! I WANT THAT RED BULL SEAT! I'LL BE SECOND DRIVER AGAIN!

charles leclerc i'll take alex as a teammate

ollie bearman-leclerc damn, guess i'll die or something. charles leclerc in the sense that you still need time to mature at haas before you drive at red bull aurora button sure, just say you hate him or something. charles leclerc this is why you tripped this morning

mick schumacher spending an awful lot of time with the leclercs aren't you aurora?

aurora button shut the fuck up, focus on alex's mental breakdown

alex albon IT'S JUST UNFAIR! THERE'S NO FUCKIGN WAY THIS IS HAPPENING TO ME!

alex albon why do bad things happen to good people? i've never done anything wrong

natalia leclerc that's a lie, you dared me to jump off the roof into the pool and i broke my leg alex albon and somehow it's my fault that you didn't stick the landing?

max verstappen 🫵🤣

oscar piastri-leclerc at least he won't me terrorize us and will be at the back of the grid

pato o'ward-leclerc rip ollie bearman, he's going to get killed by carlos sainz ollie bearman-leclerc WHAT THE FUCK WHY? logan sargeant-leclerc you're a leclerc lovechild. man am i happy to be gone for once

ollie bearman-leclerc i hope everyone's pillow is warm on both sides

aurora button damn what he say fuck me for ollie bearman-leclerc except for you of course

max verstappen back to our regularly scheduled clownery i see

aurora button fuck you ollie bearman-leclerc fuck you

alex albon I'M SUFFERING! DOES ANYONE KNOW ANY MERCENARIES?? OR PAID ASSASSINS?

mick schumacher alex, mate, let it go, you're fucked alex albon I'LL LITERALLY KILL MYSELF BEFORE I HAVE TO DRIVE ALONGSIDE THAT MAN AS MY TEAMMATE! HE'S GOING TO KILL ME!!

natalia leclerc this family is a fucking nightmare...

alex albon YOU'RE LITERALLY PLANNING A WEDDING BETWEEN FERNANDO AND YOUR DAD TO PISS OFF THE SAINZ FAMILY!! charles leclerc IT'S A GENIUS PLAN ALEXANDER!! alex albon I'VE BEEN CURSED AND YOU'RE FUCKING LAUGHING? max verstappen pretty much, yeah

alex albon fuck you guys, i'll go complain to george or lily instead.

natalia leclerc remind me to pay lily and george for dealing with you instead of us alex albon FUCK OFF!

liked by natalia_leclerc, fernandoalo_oficial, olliebearman and others

marvelgossip well marvel nerds, we've got some new hot gossip this week, starring none other than the lovely santiago ruiz who will be playing reed richards aka mr. fantastic, in the new fantastic four adaptation. while arriving on the set of marvel’s fantastic four, mr. ruiz, was seen wearing a ring on his ring finger that wasn't there before. could this be a plot detail or is mr. ruiz perhaps married to someone unknown? 

tagged: santiagoruiz

view all comments

user1 JOEL MILLER I SWEAR TO THOR IF YOU SECRETLY GOT MARRIED-

user2 this is probably just another plot point guys because if santiago ruiz, one of the hottest names in hollywood got married, we'd for sure know about it.

user3 you people call yourselves marvel nerds but you don't know that canonically reed richards is married to sue storm, of course he's wearing a fucking ring user4 i only watched the movies with jessica alba and chris evans and even i know this shit

user5 guys it's cool, he's married to me, no need to worry about it

user6 boring, old news, santiago got married like a week ago

user7 HE'S MARRIED? TO FUCKING WHO?? user6 he's married to fernando alonso?? a 2x spanish formula 1 world champion, i fear this is old news user7 OLD NEWS TO FUCKING WHO? THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'M HEARING ABOUT IT??

fernandoalo_oficial oh when will my husband return from war

user8 this man has 7.3 million instagram followers and he's thirsting over santiago ruiz on a marvel gossip page fernandoalo_oficial have you seen him?

estebanocon wedding of the century folks, wedding of the century

olliebearman wedding was in spain, i ended up in portugal with kimi and aurora

oscarpiastri i'm convinced you three would've ended up in the harbor had the wedding been in monaco aurorabutton you don't know shit, this was a decision we made while sober

user9 i've never been so confused in my life and i take ap chemistry

marvelgossip there's never been this many verified pages on my account, holy shit

natalia_leclerc that's papa right there

marvelgossip natalia, is your father married to fernando alonso? natalia_leclerc yes, my dad did in fact marry fernando alonso charles_leclerc it was the highlight of my year and i won monaco and found out my wife is pregnant

jensonbutton guess i just lost my husband

user10 are you talking about fernando or santiago? jensonbutton yes

user11 millions of fangirls around the world just let out the ugliest scream of pain

user12 forget the fangirls the f1 drivers, who are known to love santiago ruiz just let out the ugliest screams ever alex_albon they get me, i waited years to marry santiago ruiz and white man did it in 3 weeks landonorris truly mourning the loss of single santiago ruiz and i guess fernando too but mostly for santiago

liked by pierregasly, sukiwaterhouse, santiagoruiz and others

natalia_leclerc helped put together a top secret wedding in two weeks with a some help, what did you guys do? 

tagged: santiagoruiz, fernandoalo_oficial, charles_leclerc, francesca.cgomes, aurorabutton

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mrsamclaflin thanks for the invite, it was very fun!

natalia_leclerc thank you for stopping by on such short notice sam mrsamclaflin of course, call me for any other super top secret wedding and i'll be there.

user13 wait, so this wasn't a joke?

liamlawson30 that's what i thought the entire time fernandoalo_oficial you were there when i proposed, much to my displeasure user14 these two beefing even off track will never not be funny to me

yukitsunoda0511 abuelo looking great in that picture!

user15 when the hell did yuki become a leclerc? yukitsunoda0511 when i became the only one mom knew who could cook a good meal oscarpiastri i can cook too yuki logansargeant mate, i hate to tell you this, but no, you can't

lewishamilton i couldn't tell this wedding was pulled together in a few weeks

francesca.cgomes that's such a huge compliment coming from you pierregasly i complimented you guys too? aurorabutton but is your name sir lewis hamilton? do you have 7 world titles? do you sing the words, "i like to play the doctor, operation?" user16 that song will haunt lewis for the rest of his life

olliebearman shoutout to my super great ring bear skills

aurorabutton ring bearER kimi.antonelli that joke wasn't funny the first 300 times olliebearman the flower girl who tripped doesn't get to speak kimi.antonelli GABRIEL TRIPPED ME? gabrielbortoleto_ i should've been flower girl not you or aurora aurorabutton stay pressed fernando's 2nd favorite child gabrielbortoleto WHO THE HELL IS THE FIRST? aurorabutton me bitch

user17 summer break so crazy a marvel actor and an f1 driver just got married

user18 don't forget the f1 announcement user19 thoughts and prayers to alex albon, he's going to need them ♥︎ liked by charles_leclerc, natalia_leclerc, aurorabutton and others

aurorabutton i think we outdid ourselves with this one

francesca.cgomes it almost makes up for the stress we caused you? aurorabutton not a fuckign chance, you two owe me big time natalia_leclerc but i'm pregnant? aurorabutton once you're no longer pregnant then

fernandoalo_oficial is this, my hija?

natalia_leclerc papa?? bensantos_ruiz i refuse to call this man dad santiagoruiz that's not very nice benjamin fernandoalo_oficial aurora said to put, "who's your daddy now bitch?"

user20 i hope santiago knows that by marrying fernando he just became a stepfather to all of fernando's grid children.

sukiwaterhouse santiago made a jaw-dropping groom and i guess fernando's there too ♥︎ liked by landonorris, georgerussell63, liamlawson and others

user21 not all the drivers in the likes of that comment

user22 i can't be the only one confused on the fernando alonso and santiago ruiz dating timeline, right?

user23 when the hell did they start dating is my first question? user24 how long have they been together is my second question? user25 so many questions and so little answers

jenson button WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU TWO IDIOTS?!

jenson button AURORA KATHERINE BUTTON WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?

jenson button AND SOMEONE ADD KIMI!

natalia leclerc added kimi antonelli

kimi antonelli i didn't do it!

jenson button WHERE ARE THEY?!

kimi antonelli hiding at lewis' apartment aurora button SNITCHES END UP IN DITCHES KIMI!

ollie bearman-leclerc your middle name is katherine?

max verstappen that's information you should know about your wife before you marry her ollie bearman-leclerc YOU'RE NOT HELPING VERSTAPPEN!

logan sargeant-leclerc well she did say she was going to become a leclerc one way or another

liam lawson wow, one leclerc got married in vegas and the other got married drunk in portugal yuki tsunoda-leclerc don't forget one got married for the bit

lewis hamilton don't leave blood all over my apartment jenson

ollie bearman-leclerc IS THAT HIM POUNDING ON THE DOOR?!

aurora button IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! WE WERE DRUNK!

ollie bearman-leclerc I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE! LEWIS DON'T LET HIM IN!

natalia leclerc what the hell is going on?

kimi antonelli ollie and aurora accidentally got married in portugal and now jenson's going to most likely kill ollie. oscar piastri-leclerc does this mean i get to be the favorite child now?

daniel ricciardo what the hell did i fucking miss?

liam lawson so fucking much dude

yuki tsunoda-leclerc jenson's probably killing ollie as we speak

lewis hamilton the fuckers barricaded themselves in my room with roscoe

ollie bearman-leclerc I HAVE SO MUCH LIVE FOR! I JUST GOT AN F1 SEAT! I GOT MARRIED?!

jenson button YOU'RE NOT FUCKIGN HELPING BEARMAN! I'M GOING TO FILET YOU!

aurora button man, where the hell is mick to talk some sense into me when i fucking need it?

kimi raïkkönen jenson, don't you dare touch a hair on his head or i will have one of my drivers run you over

max verstappen and think about it like this, they may be married but they still haven't consummated the marriage

ollie bearman-leclerc IT'S LIKE YOU FUCKING WANT ME DEAD OR SOMETHING? jenson button WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN BEARMAN?!

aurora button he's pounding on the door and roscoe's barking again

ollie bearman-leclerc WE DIDN'T CONSUMMATE THE MARRIAGE! WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WE WERE MARRIED UNTIL KIMI SENT US A PICTURE OF THE DOCUMENT!

ben santos-ruiz this isn't the middle ages. we don't need to consummate a marriage

aurora button now my dad is arguing with lewis on the pros and cons of pissing off kimi by killing my husband

jenson button STOP CALLING HIM THAT! aurora button legally he is my husband? jenson button legally i can kill both of you aurora button legally mom would kill you for killing me and her son-in-law who she hasn't even met

charles leclerc jenson, please don't kill my son

ollie bearman-leclerc THAT'S IT? THAT'S ALL YOU'RE GOING TO SAY? natalia leclerc he's painting the nursery, he's very busy ollie

ollie bearman-leclerc SOMEONE ELSE IS POUNDING ON THE DOOR!!

ollie bearman-leclerc oh it's seb, thank god oscar piastri-leclerc this is better than any show i could ever watch sebastian vettel ollie, please come out now, jenson is restrained. we need to talk about this.

liam lawson man don't take away my favorite reality show

aurora button i'll let you know how it goes liam

pato o'ward-leclerc what in the everliving fuck did i fucking miss?

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¡leclerc-s speaks! 𝜗𝜚 yeah, i have no excuses for this. i was sleep deprived when i started writing this and just continued it after. and yes, the faceclaim for natalia’s father is pedro pascal, but that’s because i love him. 𝜗𝜚 anyway, happy new year!! note: this will transfer over in the mastermind fic but it will be more in depth.

¡disclaimer! 𝜗𝜚 this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[that-hazbin]

Happy New Year's, have an AU

AU where Alastor wasn't doing the horrible things that would land him in hell, and God panicked and realized that their Grand Plan of Redemption was falling apart from this single divergence. After all the hassle and headache of getting Charlie Morningstar into existence (TEN FUCKING MILLENNIA, LUCIFER, IT TOOK YOU THAT LONG TO SHAPESHIFT A DICK???), the Grand Plan can NOT be ruined because this one soul refused to go down and play their part.

Apparently, divine omniscience isn't good enough because it can't predict a Mama's Boy. Alastor promised his mama that he'd see her at the pearly gates, and he's damn well going to keep that promise. He's channeling all of his homicidal tendencies by airing out the dirty laundry of immoral scum on his not-so-legal radio broadcast. And anonymously sending the evidence to the news. And hey, you know what? Ruining people's lives seems to be a fate worse than death, because they're forced to live in misery! Mama was right, resisting temptation DOES grant reward!

(The temptation being homicide, and the reward being a fate worse than death, if he wasn't being clear.)

God is, of course, losing it, because one of the big pawns in getting The Grand Fucking Plan to work is not doing what they are supposed to, and seems to be on the track towards heaven. Which, what the fuck? HOW. That should not be POSSIBLE with a soul like this!

(Mama Alastor is just THAT good of a parent.)

So. God has to do something drastic here, obviously. They are NOT going to wait another ten thousand years for redemption to become possible, they've already waited long enough for shit like the EXTERMINATIONS to happen, and it'll just get worse in the future if they don't hurry this along.

God decides to do as their darling son Lucifer does, and makes a deal. With Alastor.

Alastor rejects the deal. Sorry, sir, his mama's waiting for him in heaven and he refuses to disappoint her.

God: Are you serious right now. Are you serious. I'm God.

Alastor: Yes, and?

God: I could literally grant you anything??

Alastor: I want to go to heaven and spend the rest of my afterlife with my mother. YOU want me to go to hell. Literally.

God: Well, yes, BUT. Once The Plan is finished, you can totally go to heaven afterwards?

Alastor: Uh huh. And how long do you anticipate this plan to take?

God, knowing full well that Charlie is mentally a teenager right now and is in no position to be making her dreams a reality for at least another century: UM.

Alastor: No deal, I'm not leaving my mama waiting.

To think, The Creator of All is DESPERATELY trying to get the cooperation of a mere mortal. Alastor is completely unmoved, and has made it clear that he only cares about his mother and her happiness. Which brings an idea to mind...

God: I could... make your mother a powerful figure in heaven?

Alastor: What? What use is power in heaven, isn't it already a paradise?

God: Uh. No, actually, otherwise heaven wouldn't be committing yearly genocide. Not all angels are virtuous, despite my best efforts.

Alastor: EXCUSE ME?!

Getting a deal was a lot easier after that.

Alastor kills a man (ONLY ONE, he can't disappoint his mama any further than that...) and then gets himself sent to hell. Fortunately, his deal grants him quite a lot of power to protect himself with! Unfortunately, he has a direct line of communication with God via sound waves. He hears God in his head. All. The. Time.

He has REGRETS.

All God seems to talk about is their favorite child, Lucifer, and The Plan. It is distracting and EXTREMELY annoying. Alastor knows more about Lucifer than any mortal in the universe, and he HATES IT.

[nothorses]

I'm starting to feel like.. i should stop looking to transfems for allyship. the way so many of them talk about and treat transmascs... i'm probably better off on my own than trying to form any kind of united front or community or whatever with them. the number of times i've seen transfems putting transmascs down lately is just.. it's ridiculous..

Trans people have been eating each other alive for a long time, and it's gonna keep happening, unfortunately. On the bright side, not everyone's like that! And lots of transmascs (and other trans folks) suck just as bad as the transfems letting you down.

The thing about it is that if you want a better trans community, you have to help make it. If you want solidarity, you have to start by offering yours. If you want the river to be clean, you need to go pick the litter out of it. I know it's hard and unpleasant a lot of the time, and it's scary because you might get hurt, but you still have to try. Being scared or tired or even hurt doesn't get you out of trying.

There are a lot of people already trying together, and a lot of them are transfem. Seek them out in every way you can. (I often reblog from them, if you need a place to start, and I think I've put some lists under my #recs tag over the years)

And don't let the seperationism get you. I'm so serious right now, we cannot under any circumstances afford to entertain seperationist ideas or feelings. Start reckoning with it if you haven't yet, and don't let yourself stop reckoning with it.

You need to remember that even the ones who are wrong about you are still more right about themselves than you could ever be, and you need to listen to what they're saying about themselves anyway. If you start tuning them all out because of what they're getting wrong about you, you will lose a massive part of the story, and your picture will always be incomplete. We can't make things better for trans people if our picture of transphobia and trans experiences is incomplete.

I'm sorry you've been hurt. You deserve better. I hope you're able to connect with folks who make it easier soon.

[jazeswhbhaven]

I just want sth fluff right now... How about a week with the kings (plus Lucifer) turn into a smol boiiii (still chosen between their mind still normal or a completely child).

Hehe wonder if the whole kingdom would turn upside down because of the mother side of MC :3 (like they're a really good mother/caretaker/...)

(ok I'm sorry for the grammar, english is not my first language 🥹🥹)

Thank you for waiting anon, and don't worry I understood what you meant!

MC being a caretaker for our kings when they suddenly get turned into toddler versions of themselves is so much fun to think about honestly. They were probably all just little menaces'~

Lead in: Uh oh, a strange spell has come across Hell! For a week in springtime, it seems that a certain tree has spread pollen and affected only certain devils, that being the kings...and now they're? young devils? They have physically regressed in age to that of a small child (each king looking different based on the amount of pollen they inhaled). Let's see how MC will fare having to be a caretaker for them!

Satan: He's so mischievous, getting into everything and breaking things. And who knew a devil this age would still be teething with all of his teeth in?! There's bite marks in the furniture, the curtains, just about everything. He's also got a mouth on him, and plays pranks often. Sitri is being driven mad, and Ppyong has been chewed on like a toy far too much. Here comes MC to the rescue! They can't really discipline him that well, but they are firm by wrapping him up in a thick blanket burrito so he can move. He's a bit feisty and likes to test MC, but that's nothing for them. Though they had to be careful when feeding him or he's liable to take off their fingers in the process. The entire week goes well, and thankfully MC doesn't have to change any diapers. But...Satan purposely doesn't aim for the toilet so the walls are uh...quite filthy. Good thing this was only for a week and Gehenna is back to somewhat of normalcy.

Mammon: Thankfully, when he was turned into a small devil again he didn't inhale too much of the pollen resembling a 10 year old boy. As a child, Mammon was sick a lot and had to be monitored. He was just as curious and still didn't have that filter. So for the most part he was self sufficient. MC still needed to be there for him just to make sure he doesn't get himself hurt. And now that he's got MC to care for him, he gets in his feelings, still remembering everything that happened to him before...he clings to MC, often cuddling and being silent. Sometimes even crying. MC getting to see him this emotional more often is a nice change of pace as he seems to just bury his emotions more often as an adult. MC even sings to him, reads to him, and lets him sleep in the same bed with a few stuffed toys. When the week is over, he's back to himself but there's something slightly different about him now. It seems that maybe, his inner child has healed just a little.

Beelzebub: For whatever reason, he's a toddler, and just as rambunctious and destructive. His powers are still quite strong, and are out of control. Bael thought he couldn't get work done then? He certain can't now. Paperwork drawn on with crayon, puddles of acid spit, random half eaten piles of food...and hide and seek seems to be his favorite game that turns into a disaster when he's hiding in one of the many ADULT clubs in Aybssos. It's up to MC to help rangle in this small devil and fast. They prepare pre-made snacks of his favorite foods, the games that MC comes up with are good enough for his short attention span and fun enough to repeat multiple times of the day, a large room where he can color on the walls and crawl on them even, and well he can even use the targets added in for practice with aiming his acidic spit. It's a full time job looking after Beel, but MC has it done. It was also the most difficult week for everyone at the palace. Worst part is...Beel doesn't remember anything once he's back to normal.

Leviathan: You'd assume that looking over a small Levi would be easy. Um, it's not. Him being back at that age that he was brings back horrible memories of when he was in Heaven in the devil camps. He's lashing out on all the citizens of Hades, even his nobles, paranoia, nightmares, not wanting to come out of his coffin nor eat. It's a mess. MC has a lot of work cut out for them, but they go into this with grace and patience. Levi doesn't trust them, and MC has the bruises and scratches to prove it. But slowly through the week, he starts to calm down, though still independent. The only other noble MC has to worry about is Orias who has been trying to take advantage of this situation. But it seems that Levi's innocence deters him (and MC protecting Levi) The last half of the week, Levi is now sleeping with MC inside the coffin so his nightmares aren't as bad. He's even played a couple games with them, and held their hand just out of nowhere. When he's back to normal, he doesn't admit to anything that happened with MC while they were there, denying pretty much everything. But he's closer to MC now after the event. At least Hades is back in working order!

Lucifer: SMALL ANGEL LUCI??? When MC had the prevleige of seeing him this way, he's very much adorable. His wings have temporarily returned, but they're tiny, just itty bitty. His hair is fluffy, eyes wide and full of wonder, and his halo is so bright and cheery. This a different side of Luci that must have died over time being in Heaven. But during this time he's very quiet, likes to cling on MC, and his nobles, riding on their backs and asking for snacks and angel milk. Gamigin helps MC the most, the jingling of his staff actually being soothing to small angel Luci. Paradise Lost though for the entire week was just as it was before. Mostly peaceful, nothing important going on other than this. The week turns out to be pretty easy for MC in watching him. When he's back to normal, he kindly asks MC to never mention what they saw to anyone. His nobles also will die with this secret. MC feels important, knowing that even Luci's own brothers have never seen him that young.

Belphegor: Huh...well it seems the pollen has turned Belphie into a baby. And even when he's sleeping, he causes alot of problems for Nifelheim. His little baby snores causes earthquakes, he also soils his diaper during his sleep even though he's only been drinking milk....those diaper changes are near radioactive. When he wakes up and cries to be fed it's like a high pitched ear splitting cry. At least the best part is when he's asleep, in a deep deep sleep? No thing happens. And thankfully, he was asleep for the majority of the week. There was only once where MC had to deal with him awake and he was cranky the entire time. Non-stop crying, hair pulling, and demanding that Beleth holds him as he was biting his arm with his gums to teeth. Beleth did well, he and MC acting like a married couple while watching him. The week may have been over and done and he was back to normal, but goodness. Maybe it's a good thing he was sleeping for majority of his life until recently. Him being awake as a young devil is a pain.

Asmodeus: It's rumored that no one has seen Asmo as a young devil. Well that changed when MC got to watch him. He's...a lot less horny as a small devil which is a relief. He was still mischievous, and often hinted wanting milk from MC even though they had no ability to breastfeed/produce milk. But it was strange that he would ask that when he's...a young child devil. Oh, well maybe he was starting his puberty early. But it's no matter, his charming abilities were still working all to well meaning that MC spoiled him with pretty much attention and affection. He was still very behaved and would often be reading or writing something in a journal. MC partially wishes he could be like this all the time and wondered where all that horny energy came from even as the embodiment of lust. Maybe he'd tell her later when he was back to normal. Abaddon didn't change much at all in his absence, the guards holding things down as per usual.

[whoops-all-jennas]

Look Who's Inside Again - j.o.

Jenna Ortega x fem!reader

"Try making faces, try telling jokes making little sounds."

Summary: This is your first time playing a major role in a movie and it's intimidating. Jenna comforts you after you hide away in your trailer.

a/n: y/f/m means your favorite media. movie, book, anime, video game, whatever.

The muted sound of everyone talking fills my ears as I zone out. The first few days on set are being used to get the cast adjusted to each other. I've never had such a major role before in a big movie, to say I'm nervous is an understatement.

I already have trouble talking to people normally, how am I supposed to talk to celebrities? Especially when they're the ones approaching me. Shouldn't it be the other way around?

"Y/n?" A voice enters my head, my head perking up at the mention of my name. I meet my eyes to Jenna's. "Are you okay?"

"I uh, yeah I'm doing good." I force a smile before looking to the side, avoiding her gaze. I have never felt more parasocial in my life. How am I supposed to hold a conversation with these people, especially Jenna, when I feel like I already know too much about them and they know nothing about me.

The main cast consists of four people. Jenna Ortega, Finn Wolfhard, Wyatt Oleff, and I. It's one of those horror movies where it's a group of teenagers investigating something where they should die because of it, but we all know they won't because it's a movie.

"So are you excited? This is your first major role right?" I turn towards the voice to meet Finn. "This could be a big debut for you."

"Yeah I'm excited." I grab my arm, holding myself and taking up as little space as possible. "I'm mostly nervous though, a lot can happen."

I feel Jenna's gaze on me, so I turn to look at her to find a look of curiosity in her eyes. "It can be intimidating, but you can do it. I believe in you." Jenna's genuine smile meets my uncertain face.

Jenna saying 'I believe in you' repeats in my head like a metronome. This somehow makes me feel more nervous and also safer at the same time.

I just don't want to embarrass myself in front of these people, especially Jenna.

It seems the conversation continued while I was in my head. Everyone's eyes were on me expectingly. Did they ask me something?

"Sorry, what'd you guys say?" I ask, Finn and Wyatt look at each for a moment with a face that I can't tell is annoyance or uncertainty. "It wasn't important." Wyatt states.

That feeling of safety is now gone, my heart beating at a thousand miles an hour.

Was it important?

I feel my legs start to shake from the nerves, as if I could fall at the slightest inconvenience.

The nervousness replaced with anxiety and uncontrollable thoughts. 'Did I already blow it before I did a single scene? Does everyone think I'm annoying? That I'm distant?'

I find Jenna's worried gaze on me yet again, causing me to look at the ground for a moment before trying to keep eye contact with the main cast and failing. "I'll be back."

I quickly find myself walking to my assigned trailer, my pace faster than usual. When I finally find myself inside, I close the door pushing my back against it before sliding down. I sit there with my knees to my chest and head in my arms wrapped around my legs.

I already decorated my trailer to procrastinate on meeting the others. I tried my best to make it feel like home, bringing posters and collectibles from different pieces of media I enjoy. The blinds are closed, blocking the light sure, but also separating the trailer from the set.

Luckily, I also brought some string lights to hang across the ceiling. I don't know if I could handle the harsh florescent lights my entire time here.

I take a moment to try to take control of my breathing, doing the breathing exercises I've been instructed since I was little.

I'm interrupted with knocking on the door I'm leaning on. I stand to open the door to find Jenna Ortega on the other side. I still can't believe I'm seeing her in person and on talking terms.

Well, if I ever actually try to talk to her that is.

"Hey, I just wanted to check on you. It seemed like something was wrong." Her worried yet genuine glance meets mine.

"I'm- I don't know." I cut myself off to stop myself from lying, biting my bottom lip.

Jenna looks past me for a moment. "Can I come in?"

I nod, opening the door more and taking a step back. Jenna walks past me, she's wearing this nice perfume that fills the scentless trailer.

She looks around, admiring the decorations. "I like the string lights, I can't handle the florescent lights they use in these."

I close the door before approaching the built in couch. "Thanks, I actually wasn't aware of them until I got here. Luckily, I brought them from home by chance."

Jenna turns, taking the seat next to me. "Do you wanna talk about what's wrong? I understand if you don't want to."

"I-"

I cut myself off again, unsure what to say. "I don't know."

My heart is still beating to the bpm of flight of the bumblebee.

Jenna gives me a genuine smile, trying to make me feel comfortable, before glancing around the room again. Her eyes linger on the merchandise of different medias.

"How about we talk about media we like?" Her genuine gaze meeting mine. "I'll start, I really like Breaking Bad. It's kinda a guilty pleasure of mine."

My eyes slightly light up.

"I also really like Breaking Bad." I say, trying to reflect her genuineness. "I really like the character development and how much they change throughout the story."

Jenna scots a little closer. "I know right?! it's so good!" She seems so interested in the conversation.

She looks into my eyes with a smile. "Now it's your turn."

I look around the room for a moment, unsure what I should say. For a lot of my life I was told I can get annoying when I delve into my interests. It's like whenever I start talking about it I can't stop.

I don't want her to think I'm annoying, but I also don't want to tear down all the work she did to try to get me comfortable.

"I really like y/f/m, I just love the universe that they made so much and the characters." I start speaking, pausing for a moment to read Jenna's expression.

She is smiling and has this look in her eyes, like a genuine interest in what I'm talking about. My eyes feel like an open door as she looks into them.

"You can keep talking, I was listening." Her smile somehow becomes more genuine, causing a smile to creep up on my face.

For the past few minutes Jenna let me ramble about y/f/m. I soon realize I've likely been rambling for way too long "I'm sorry, I didn't realize how long I was talking." My smile fades, turning to embarrassment in an instant.

"What, no it's okay." She puts a hand on my knee comfortingly. "I was interested in what you were talking about."

I look at her eyes, her genuine eyes complimented with her genuine smile.

She is just so genuine.

"Are you sure I'm not being annoying?" I ask, insecurity laced in my voice.

She nods to me, her smile fills my heart.

I'll never get over the way she looks at me. As if she's actually interested in the conversation, interested in who I am.

I find myself looking down to the couch cushion, hiding my face. Soft gentle sobs start to escape my body, my shoulders slightly shaking.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Jenna scots closer, her hand gently grabbing my unstable shoulders.

I sniffle before getting my head up, revealing my glossy eyes and a few tears. My head feels like a boulder, trying to keep it lifted on top of my shoulders.

I shake my head with a smile. "It's stupid."

"There isn't a stupid reason to cry." Jenna says comfortingly, rubbing my shoulder with her thumb as she rests her hand there.

I look away again for a moment before meeting Jenna's gentle eyes. I open my mouth, no sound coming out as I try to decide my words before I speak. "It's just you're so nice. Most people either just let me speak, but are clearly disinterested or just flat out call me annoying."

Jenna's eyes are laced with empathy as she looks into my eyes like windows.

I sniffle before speaking again, fanning my face for moment. "And you just seem so interested and intrigued in what I'm talking about, and it just means so much and- I don't know."

She continues to rub my arm. There was a moment of silence, the only noise being my soft sobs until Jenna spoke. "I loved seeing the excitement and passion you have about y/f/m. You should talk to me more about it some time." She says with a smile.

I nod. "Yeah, I'd like that." A sniffle interrupts the middle of my sentence.

"I should probably try to calm down, I don't really want to go back outside looking like this." I motion my hands over my face, addressing my puffy eyes and tear streaked face.

Jenna breaks eye contact for a moment, finding the tv before meeting my gaze again. "How about we watch something?"

I nod, she stands and quickly finds the remote. "Before we start watching something, do you need a hug? You're allowed to say no."

I love how considerate she is.

I nod, standing up. She holds her arms out, inviting me into her arms. I put my arms around her lower back and she wraps hers around my upper back, one hand resting on the back of my head playing with my hair comfortingly. She holds me in her warm, gentle embrace for a moment before letting go.

She meets my face with a smile. "Feel better?"

I quickly nod with a smile on my face, happiness in my eyes.

"Do you have any comfort movies?" Jenna asks, finding her seat back on the couch.

I find my seat next to her. "I really like Studio Ghibli movies."

Jenna points the remote to the TV. "How about Spirited Away?"

"That sounds good to me." I say with a nod, looking at her one more time with a smile before we start the movie.

a/n: hii guys, hope you enjoyed my first Jenna fic. this was inspired by the tiktoks I've seen about the way Jenna looks at people. maybe if you guys behave you'll get a Jenna fic that has actual romance in it next.

[panpanghost]

Part 12 of this nameless au wait- NAMELESS!!!! That's it!!! That's the name!!!!

Part 12 of Nameless au (:D!!!)

_"They're here!" Macaque jumped off the couch and ran to the window.

He pushed the curtains and looked out. Just as he did, flames started forming and his sister with two guys stepped out of it.

_"Wow. Who's that guy?"

_"That's Redson, her son." Wukong answered standing behind his moon,

_"Not the red one, I already sensed he's hers. The other one. Why is he taking a human form?"

_"You meam MK? How did you know he's not a human?"

_"I don't know. It's like a magnet or something. He's closer to being one of us than anything else. Can't you feel it?"

_"I felt something odd about him. I still can't put my finger on it."

_"Well that's for later. Go get my sister!" Macaque pushed Wukong to get the door, he was so excited he forgot who he was talking to,

_"So demanding." Wukong acted exhausted,

_"Goooooooo." Macaque pleaded,

_"Alright, alright." Wukong smiled and went to get their guests. He felt a sting in his heart. Why doesn't he get that happy when he sees me?

_"Don't let the other guys in."

_"I won't."

(I got stuck here for like 20 minutes then gave up. I still don't know where I'm going with this.)

Wukong stepped to the door and opened it, catching PIF and the kids arriving at the entrance.

_"Princess Iron Fan, I'm so glad you could make it." Wukong said with a smile, a smile hiding a murderous intent,

_"Of course I came, my brother is ill."

_"I'm sure he'll feel better once he sees you."

_"Where is he?"

_"Follow me." he stopped in his track and turned to the kids. "I'm sorry kiddos, but grown-ups have to talk, so you'll have to wait outside for now."

_"Oh, that's ok." MK lifted up a bag in his hands, "Can you give this to Macaque on my behalf. I made it for him.... an apology cake."

_"Will do kiddo. I'm sure he'll love it." As Wukong took the bag he got closer to MK and whispered :"Way to go kiddo, proud of you. Take him to the top of the waterfall at sundown. It's called 'lovers spot' for a reason."

_"Pf- WHA- pff- PAH- No! I mean YES! Whatever! Let's go Red!" MK's brain malfunctioned in that moment, they were lucky he shut his mouth and just dragged a very confused and worried Redson away.

_"Now that the lovers are on their way, let's get you to moonpie. He's really excited to meet you." Wukong said and walked in first to show the way,

_"Zizi!" Macaque yelled as he jumped into his sisters arms, embracing her with every limb he has,

_"Zizi? Haven't heard that nickname in so long." PIF smiled as she hugged him back. He hasn't called her that in centuries. He is probably at a young age mentally, probably the age of her son or younger. Though he does look different, did the king give him an eye?

_"I missed you."

_"I missed you too. Also do you want me to keep carrying you or are you going to get down?"

_"Keep carrying me."

_"This isn't my house, I can't tell the way in."

After a moment of silence, Macaque finally gave up,

_"Fine..." He sounded sad but recovered immediately: "I made some food and appetisers! I didn't know I could cook, or make sweets. But I did a really good jod! You must taste them!" Macaque held her hand and took her to the kitchen where he worked all night to make sure she'd like his food. The king helped a lot.

_"I don't think you're leaving me a choice."

_"Nope. Also you need to tell me all about it."

_"About what?"

_"Your husband and son obviously!"

_"Isn't there a more important matter to discuss?"

_"Nuh-uh! Not to me there isn't. I can't believe I missed out on my first nephew." Macaque said as he sat next to her on the couch in the salon, the king sat on the couch to their right,

_"What do you mean first? I'm not having another."

_"Let's put a pin on this. Now tell me how you met your husband."

_"Would you like some tea?" Wukong asked smiling at the Princess. It was a clear warning, don't mention anything bad about Sun Wukong or else.

_"Yes. Thank you." She answered calmly, now she knows for sure, one mistake and she'll lose her family, she must stay focused :"Well he was a sworn brother of the Monkey King and we met by chance. Things escalated quickly, if I'm honest. I think they call it love at first sight."

_"Oooooooooouuuuuuuw." Macaque gave her a nudge on the elbow.

_"Aw stop it. You weren't that better. Once you saw how strong the king is you fell head first." She gave him a sly smile,

_"I can't answer that question because I can't remember but I don't think I'll for anyone that is just strong."

My sister doesn't compliment anyone, this is a warning, the king is stronger than he's showing.

_"Then I don't know why. The only thing worth noting about him is his strength."

_"And his face." Alright, so he is definitely dangerous, better keep him in a good mood.

_"Not to me."

_"He's also really kind and likes kids." He can't be that bad...

_"How come he's nice to others and not me?"

_"Because I'm 90% sure you tried to convince me I can do better." So he is threatening her and keeping me hostage, shit. It kinda hurts...

_"You can."

_"Maybe. But I like where I'm at now." I'm sorry, but I won't risk you getting hurt, I shouldn't have brought you here...

_"You might regret these words one day."

_"I hope not. At least I don't regret them right now."

_"Yeh. Do what you want, but just so you know, my house is always open for you."

She didn't say yes. So I also don't want to stay here. This is worse than I thought.

_"I'll think about it, but for now. I think I'll stay here. But I do wish to meet your husband." She wants to take me with her, I'm sorry sis, it's too dangerous without my power.

_"You've met him before but he'll be happy to see you nonetheless."

_"You already know I can't remember, but I'm happy for you, truly." I'm sorry for putting in this position.

_"I'm happy too." She smiled at him, he knows that smile, the one that says I have a plan.

_"So wha about your son?"

_"He's a smart kid."

_"Awww, never thought I'd live to see the day where you become a loving mother."

_"What is that supposed to mean?"

_"I'm just saying your husband must like monsters in disguise."

_"Are you saying I'm a monster?"

_"So your son is corting Wukong's successor."

_"He is. It hasn't been that long though. It happened a few days ago but I'm sure there was something before that."

_"Ooooo. Can we keep talking after we eat. I'm so weak I have to eat everyday or I'll die." I need to get her out of here as soon as possible.

_"Yeh, I'm also very excited to try out your food."

_"Don't give me all the credit, Wukong helped... Unless you hate it then it's his fault."

_"Hey! I just showed you the recipes and handed you the ingredients, you did the cooking." Even though Wukong was quiet until this sentence, he was feeling something off. Something about this entirely feel off. Yet he can't put his finger on it.

_"Excuses, excuses." Macaque said pushing his sister out the room,

_"At least take me with you." Wukong said in a sad tone,

_"I thought that's a given." Macaque turned to him with a smile,

_"Coming honey~" Wukong joked following them.

When will she leave? I want to stay with my moon alone. She didn't say anything but I still don't like it- KILL HER! Yes yes I should get rid of her, then Macaque will have nowhere else to go, he'll stay here forever, he'll be mine forever-

_"Wukong, can you get the chicken from the oven? Last time I burned myself. Who knew ovens could be this hot, right?" Macaque asked innocently, trying to hide the chill he felt down his spine. He is certain he felt a murderous intent just a second ago.

I need to get Zizi out of here before he does something to her or her son!

_"Sure thing." Wukong smiled,

How can I think that way, Macaque will be very sad if I kill her, it doesn't matter that she's here. She's just a guest, he's not going anywhere, he still needs me. Only me.

Wukong helped Macaque prepare the table as his sister watched. If anyone else where to see the scene they'll think they are a happy normal couple, but The princess knew better, and she cursed every second of it.

In another place on the island, MK and Redson were starting to lose hope in finding the scroll.

_"This is impossible." MK said in defeat stepped out a mountain of gold,

_"Sure feels like it." Redson said in the same energy,

_"Somehow, I don't think Monkey King left the scroll in his treasury. I think he hid it somewhere else." MK sat on the floor curled up, next to Redson,

_"I think so too. But we can't get in the house without him knowing. And who knows what will happen then." Even thought Red was frustrated, he kept his search in the piles,

_"Maybe we can ask him about it." MK let out, using his golden vision to hopefully find something useful,

_"And you think he'll answer honestly?"

_"... he won't, that if he even admits it in the first place. Also remind me to go to the top of the waterfall."

_"Yeh alright. Wait- Why?"

_"To get to the lovers spot." MK said as he got up to look at a scroll he saw,

_"Why?" Redson was feeling something, it wasn't hate.

_"So-" MK finaly registered what he had said, "WAIT! I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT!" The kid turned around in a blink and struggled to find his words, "Monkey king told me to take you there at sundown because we are lovers- I- I mean he thinks we are lovers! S-so I thought we should go so he wouldn't get suspicious!" he was hoping Redson wouldn't hear how loud his heart was beating. Why does he feel so embarrassed?

_"Oh. Alright then." There was a hint of disappointment in Redson's voice as he went back to his search.

[nihilnovisubsole]

hey, gang! miss me? no? too bad, because i miss you. i think about you all the time. i hope the year has treated you well. this is, what, the third, fourth year i've done a year-in-review post? have i done more than that? it's after midnight. i can't be bothered to check. i fear a lot of the mysteries of getting older, but i will say, i don't mind that it's easier to shrug certain things off. i look back on all the times i hid from some scary fandom discourse and go, "god, why did i care?" it helps to have other things going on.

on the other hand, i guess 2024 was the year of finding out what happens when you put everything into your day job and leave nothing for the weekend. it was a wild year at work, which i assume is normal as a game ramps up to ship. i gave a lot, which was good! i'd be lying if i said it didn't take a lot out of me. important people at trade shows have now seen things i wrote! i got to work with voice actors! good news: a lot of your faves are great people! i also made, like, no progress on any of my own projects except the picrew, which i still chip away at. yes, i still draw. more on that later.

one or two people in my coworkers-turned-friends circle have broached the subject of occupational burnout and whether i've reached it yet. as i said last year, i remember what voltage burnout felt like, and it took a much weirder, angrier journey to get me there. it's kind that they're looking out for me, though. i think it's something all creative people could stand to keep an eye on. a buddy of mine even gave a GDC talk about it. it's a shame GDC is so stingy with access to its talks. at least this article has a great summary if you're interested in learning more.

there were other things, though. my mother broke her hip in june, which forced me into a caregiver role that i'm not suited to. don't worry, she's fine now. i love her, so it was important to me, but it didn't leave a lot of time to sit and write for fun. i started what i thought would be a casual fanfic project, wildly over-scoped it, and made a ton of work for myself. i outlined an original story about a difficult, personal subject and a culture i'm descended from, but not really familiar with. there's a lot of pressure to do it right, is what i'm saying. i'm taking the only path i can think of, which is to bury myself in research. the trouble is, a lot of the literature about this time and place is also very challenging, so it burns a lot of brain calories. it's a far cry from what usually gets me to start a story, which is "i want these characters to sleep together. let's see where it goes."

in a different time, i would've taken this struggle as an omen that i wasn't the right person to write this story and abandoned it. it's critical that i don't take the coward's way out this time if i'm going to honor the question i asked at the end of last year. "what is my work saying?" my mother told me the same thing a few months ago: "i think you're a good writer, you just need to find good things to say." i take that to mean i have to write closer to real experiences, which means including the parts i don't like: disappointment, loss, mistakes, uncertainty. i had all of this year to figure out how, and the evidence shows i didn't. i don't know what to say. "oh well?" maybe you can't put a deadline on these things. in the meantime, hercule and aida deserve more stories (it's an hercule and aida story), and i want more people to know about them, and maybe i can say something real through them.

this was also the year that i reckoned with the other side of "all it takes is money to make problems go away." i was able to travel, i mean really travel, for the first time. all it took was being able to throw a chunk of my salary at it. i had some shipping drama [sorry, not the romantic kind] where i had no choice but to pony up a ton of customs fees. my arm PT didn't work, so i'll have to try a specialist who's out of my insurance network and pay full price to see them. this must be what they call "being a successful adult." i thought it'd look different. i wanted to live in the city and have a hot, mysterious boyfriend. well, i can still live closer to the city if i keep saving up for that house, and maybe some hot, mysterious guy will take pity on me someday. do you think they like 32-year-olds who play video games and have flat chests? i went all the way to paris and still didn't find out. damn! 🤌

nah, i'm kidding. i mean, i'm not, but i have other things to worry about. as i mentioned above, things with my arm have taken a curious turn. after six and a half years of assuming i had tendinitis, i found out, not only is it likely not that, i may not be injured at all. the particulars of this theory get out into the weeds of neuromuscular science, so i'll only bore you with them if you want me to. the point is, if any of it holds water, it would go a long way toward explaining why none of the typical rest/heat/stretching/strengthening protocols have worked. it's actually unfathomable how much effort i've put into solving this mystery just so i can get back to drawing fictional people kissing. you can call my creative work boring or predictable or whatever you want, but never say i haven't committed to the bit.

i don't tend to read my previous years-in-review. this year, i did, because i sensed i was grappling with a lot of the same things as last year. there's nothing i hate like being repetitive. not that you would know from the way i keep writing the same three character archetypes. humor me here. i was all set to keep whining until i reminded myself how 2023 had gone, and i thought, "geez. it wasn't that bad." nobody i love died, for a start. my health is better. i have some unread books sitting around. as terrible as 2023 was, i survived it. if you're reading this, you did too.

so here's what i'm going to do. i think you should do it with me, though whether i'm in any position to give advice is up to you. i'm not going to make any predictions about whether 2025 will be bad or good. i'm just going to see what happens. deal? all right. we'll check in next year. you'd better be there!

[deservedgrace]

So this is entirely my own opinion, take it with a grain of salt, maybe others will have different thoughts.

For me the concept of destroying all religions is very... I have my personal beliefs about what a better world looks like, but it's really, really important to not let that overshadow the reality of the world we live in.

So while I personally might believe that a hypothetical world without religion would be better than our world now, I recognize that we exist in a world where religion does exist and that there's no way to eliminate a religion without being a fascist. Most of us decided it was bad when christians did that to other religions and cultures. It's also an incredibly black and white view of religion, where because I and others had a bad experience it's entirely bad and irredeemable and nobody could ever possibly find good things in it so it should be taken away forever. That's just not accurate to what religion is.

The reality is, religion is inextricably linked with many people's cultures, communities, relationships, and identities. To destroy religion would be to destroy cultures, and communities, and people's identities, and people themselves. As much as religion has been used to oppress marginalized groups, religion can be extremely important in marginalized groups as well and aided in their survival or provided them hope. Lots of people find comfort in their religion after they have been failed time and time again by "the world". Lots of people use their religion to help cope with mental illnesses. I can believe that things shouldn't be this way all I want, but it doesn't change the fact that things are this way, and that there's no way to take away people's religions without taking away all of that and more.

When we're looking at something like drug use through a harm reduction lens, we recognize that going "okay were gonna take away all the drugs, sorry bud figure it out!" isn't helpful. We recognize offering things like clean supplies, places to safely use drugs, places to safely dispose of products like needles, community, mental health services, education, support, etc. are far more helpful. I think that this is a better lens to imagine freedom from religion. One of the big things that keeps people trapped is that their community is entirely tied into their religion and if they leave the religion, they lose their community. If people were able to find community outside their religion, they could leave easier. When people have information and options, they can choose what path is best for them and be less likely to end up in harm's way.

(ETA because I want to be explicit about this: I'm not saying the "correct" path for everyone is non religion. I can't determine that for another person. What I'm saying is that I think fewer people would be trapped in harmful sects/churches/etc if the needs that religion meets (community, support, comfort, etc) were met outside of it. If people were aware of their options and information, they could make a decision that's best for them. They might realize none of it is for them, they might realize that a different sect or religion is better for them, or they might realize where they're at is perfectly fine and now they have the option of support in multiple areas instead of one. Leaving all of it was best for me, but that's not something I get to or even want to decide for another person.)

For the second thing, to me it ties into what we consider violence. It's tied to the belief that the oppressors' violence is justified, acceptable, or not violence at all, where any reaction to said violence is disproportionate, cruel, violent.

"Fear of conflict" and "right to comfort" are tenants of white supremacy. We see it often in the belief that "calling out violence is worse than the violence itself". Black people (ESPECIALLY women) get tone policed, dismissed, and harassed to hell and back when they call out racism. A woman that calls out sexual assault often gets more social punishment than the man who perpetuated the assault. It boils down to: socially, there's "acceptable" violence (often perpetuated by non marginalized people) and "unacceptable" violence (reaction to the initial violence). If you're more concerned about someone calling out violence than you are the actual violence, you're willing to sacrifice real justice for fake harmony.

And also, violence is necessary sometimes to further social change. When people are pushed and pushed and pushed and not listened to after asking nicely, protesting, exercising other non-violent options, violence becomes inevitable. However, because people are willing to accept a level of violence from oppressors, they'll focus on the violence of the oppressed as extreme and horrible and evil.

Obviously it's important to do the work to unlearn the bigotry you more often than not grew up with in Christianity, but I truly think that if you don't also deconstruct the underlying beliefs and doctrine that run alongside (and often encourag) that bigotry in the first place, you're just going to keep running into the same issues over and over again.

[quantomeno]

Professor Layton and the Raiders of the Lost Legacy

aka "I've finally pinpointed exactly what's wrong with Azran Legacy and it's Indiana Jones"

(spoilers for all the layton games. Not many for Indiana Jones films but there are some mostly to do with the Last Crusade)

(also sorry this is such a long post I got carried away)

So, the other day I was rewatching Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (it was new years eve and I had nothing better to do and it was on tv) and as a Layton fan I chuckled a little at the opening where Indy talks about how archaeology isn't about hunting for buried treasure etc because as we all know, Layton spends even less time being an archaeology professor than Indy and honestly even less time doing anything remotely related to archaeology.

And as the film progressed, I had Layton in the back of my mind. I was a massive Indiana Jones fan around the same time I was a massive Layton fan but since Layton in the original trilogy is hardly an archaeologist I don't think I ever really made the connection between the two series.

So, the problem I've always had with Azran Legacy is twofold. One is the story letting you do the different locations in any order, because it forces the overarching plot to stagnate and is what I think is a big factor in the rushed revelations at the ending (where we have like five different things going on and like everyone dies and comes back to life like woah, slow down). The other is that it just doesn't feel 'Laytonesque'. Now, Miracle Mask also has this issue, and in that case it's kind of the point because of the move to a new console and the new graphics and the series was getting repetitive by then. And some of the things I'll discuss later will be true of MM but I think they're more pronounced in AL.

The thing I realised watching the last crusade was that there's something else: AL is an 'Indiana Jones game' (in a sense).

OK there are a few key features of an IJ film for those who haven't seen them:

Indy meets someone who wants him to track down a valuable artefact that has some sort of mystical properties (e.g. the Holy Grail)

He discovers that some bad guys are after the treasure for evil purposes (it's often nazis)

What follows is an often violent chase across countries as he tries to piece together the mystery

In the end, Indy discovers the secret but just before he can get to the treasure, the bad guys get there first

He typically gets betrayed at a pivotal moment by someone he trusted

Indy has to help the bad guys under duress (e.g. his dad is shot and can only be saved by the Holy Grail)

The bad guys get the treasure but then do something stupid because of their greed/pride/ignorance and then they get killed by the magic power of the treasure (and the myths around it are thus proven true)

Indiana Jones rejects the allure of the treasure's power and either returns it to its rightful owners, leaves it alone or it ends up hidden away in a storage facility and forgotten (despite the fact much is made of his catchphrase 'it belongs in a museum', most of the major treasures don't actually end up in a museum)

Now, if we look at Azran Legacy:

Layton meets a guy (Sycamore) who has found a mysterious girl frozen in ice who is tied to some greater legend

He soon finds out Targent is after the girl and then they discover the second clue (the Azran eggs) and realise Targent want the 'Azran Legacy'

What follows is an occasionally violent chase around the world as Layton tries to piece together the mystery and find the eggs before Targent

Layton puts together the key from the Azran eggs but it gets stolen by Descole (his 'arch nemesis' who who was disguised as Sycamore)

Everyone chases Descole to the Azran sanctuary but then Layton gets betrayed by Emmy who was secretly working for Targent

Bronev (Targent's leader), in his desire to get the Azran legacy at all costs, sacrifices the frozen girl (Aurora) by stabbing her with the key

Laputa Castle in the Sky happens robots are unleashed on the world and to stop them everyone present must sacrifice themselves

Aurora (she got better) resurrects everyone with Azran magic science and then dies herself (she was a robot so she wasn't really alive anyway)

The Azran sanctuary and the robots crumble to dust and Layton, having rejected the allure of power and so on, returns home (after dealing with some family drama but that's a whole other story)

But you see the point? Azran Legacy is a stereotypical treasure hunting plot. Which is of course The Point, but it really shows just why it doesn't feel like a Layton game.

Compare Lost Future which is often the target of criticism for its over-the-top final act. Why is LF still a Layton game? Because we don't have the 'magic' elements Azrran Legacy has. Because the location is quite fixed and isolated. Because the evil guys aren't chasing us around the globe. Sure, they appear every time we go onto their turf, but 1) that's their turf and 2) they are no chase scenes. There isn't this final act where the villain wins the prize because there is no McGuffin.

And that is the other key thing: Layton games actually very rarely have McGuffins that are actual items.

CV's golden apple is really Flora.

PB has the box, obviously and that one I concede.

Last Specter has the flute? I guess. But the golden garden is the real treasure everyone's hunting for but that's not a 'thing'.

LF has the time machine? Maybe that counts?

Eternal Diva has Ambrosia/the secret to eternal life, but Ambrosia is again a place and the secret isn't a thing either.

MM has the mask (duh).

And AL has the eggs and later the key. The point being that there's an actual hunt for the eggs. Unlike in Last Specter where the flute never really changes hands.

The next point that then arises is why don't PB and MM suffer from this problem?

PB has only got Don Paolo as the 'villain' who wants the treasure. The other treasure seekers are either the real owner (Anton) or his brother who is kind of just hanging around grumpily and leaves after being told off by a hotel clerk. There's no 'chase' and the treasure doesn't physically appear until Don Paolo drops it and then leaves the plot entirely. Also its 'magic' is explained scientifically in a (somewhat) believable (or at least comprehensible) way.

MM avoids it because it is actually a Scooby Doo plot and not an Indiana Jones plot: the villain is a guy with a grudge in a costume, the magic item had no powers and was just a key to some weird contraption that lifts up the city (for reasons) and all the 'magic' was just circus tricks. The fact it mirrors the Last Crusade's "other hand" scene is hardly relevant. Even the ruins segment is decidedly not Indiana Jones since, again, there's no race against time aspect and there are no bad guys chasing them. MM definitely takes a lot of cues from IJ but overall the game is still Laytonesque. It is a character study more than an adventure.

And for people who complain about the weirdness of Last Specter. That's not that weird. Dinosaurs existed once it's not completely insane that a big aquatic animal was hiding in the town's reservoir.

I think this even ties into why I dislike the AL 'finger point' scene: all the other games build up to that moment because it answers an important mystery at the core of the story (or leads to it). Because a Layton game is a mystery game, but AL is hardly a mystery story, or it's really just a bunch of mini mysteries embedded in a treasure hunting chase story. Like, there is the 'what is the legacy' mystery, but that's not something you solve the same way you do the hallucinations of PB or the identity of LS's spectre. It just appears by itself at the end.

In trying to make a big, exciting, globe-trotting game, Level 5 overlooked the fundamental features of a Layton game, in particular the overarching mystery, and supplanted them with treasure-hunting tropes. AL is the least Laytonesque game of them all as a result and while this is not inherently a bad thing (we all know the original trilogy's twist was getting a little stale the fourth time they did it), it does change the flavour of the game to such a degree that I personally don't love it to the same degree as the other games.

Also the whole Layton I am your brother and also Bronev is our father bit was way too rushed and I can't forgive it for that. Honestly that's actually 75% of why AL is my lowest-ranked main series game but that's less fun to talk about than all this.

[funsize-cenobites]

The weight of knowing Nightow said in an interview that Vash avoids taking lovers and deepening most relationships because of the disparity of time between Humans and Plants and the pain that comes from that... Yet he explicitly chose Wolfwood; a man who's time had already been stolen from... to spend the rest of his tomorrows with...

Indescribable.

I am genuinely unsure how to recover from this level of longing. This acceptance of the inherent tragedy that makes love beautiful at its core: That impermanence.

Vash spent all that time avoiding and yearning. Loving always at arms length and loving so hard to try and make up for that. Then when he finally finds someone strong enough, who loves Vash the same. Someone that has even a snowballs chance in hell of understanding any part of him. he loses him. Not immediately though, that would've been a mercy. No, Vash got just enough time to realize how close he was.

Vash got to start building a home in Wolfwood just in time to see it collapse.

It's haunting in a way most of the media around these themes has rarely managed to be to me personally. Vash is possibly my favorite example of that one quote:

"Grief is just love with no where to go."

And god... Vash has so so so much love trapped inside.

[b4kuch1n]

siren

[biracy]

I can't remember if I've posted abt this before but regardless: I'm sorry but I really and truly cannot get behind the idea that there is any wide-scale societal "pressure for trans men to be feminine" or "to be twinks" or whatever. You are either conflating a very small online community's beauty standard (usually some kind of transmasc pseudo-appropriation of "femboy" aesthetics, which yes, are often Bad and regressive and fetishized and etc.) with Mainstream Society, or confusing society not wanting trans men to transition with "wanting trans men to be feminine", which are certainly not the same thing. Ultimately if a cis person believes there is any validity to the concept of being trans (i.e. not a Posie Parker-esque "there's no such thing as a trans person" type), they are more likely to think that trans men should be like as masc and buff and hairy as possible or whatever bc that's what cis people think men look like and it's easier for a lot of people to recognize someone who Looks Masc as a man. It is difficult sometimes to see derision of trans guys who are Too Feminine and Not Hairy Enough or whatever (which is not always something someone has control over btw) as anything but "this is Skye who I think is a confused little girl because Skye does not pass" slightly restyled for 2023 "filthcore fagdykes" or whatever lol

[everypanelofizuku]

Chapter 83 - Loss