#There was one more little itch on top of the steamrolling that was really just insult to injury lol

[sysig]

It’s been another one of those weeks for the books

[bigsnzstanacct]

Kn/ives Out - R/ansom Fic

Inspired by these posts, although I went a liiiiiiiiiiiiiiittle overboard with it, as is my wont. This may or may not be the first of a five-or-six part series, a sort of “Five Times Ransom Pissed Off Everybody By Sneezing, and One Time He Didn’t.” Or it might just be the one little story. You know the drill, over-the-top sneezing ahoy lmao.

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    “Do we have to talk politics?” Joni asked, her fingers tensed, her eyes rolling as she walked rather briskly to the drink cart. “It’s not that I’m not willing it’s just it’s so contentious and I’m a little concerned about that kind of energy—”

“No, no, no Joni,”—Richard cutting in now, his words stretching longer in the way all of him seemed to extend and elongate when he was drunk, as though he forgot Linda and Harlan were watching and expecting—”No, Joni, you don’t get to throw stones and then hide your hand, if you say something about our President, I’m gonna say something back.”

“Now, now, Richard,”—The aforementioned Harlan—”I think we can all agree the President—”

“Our President, Harlan, our President, I’m not saying I like him but I’m saying he’s our—”

“N-now… now come on Richard”—Walt, briefly, before being steamrolled by—

“Richard, I think I’d like a change of subject now—” Linda, ordinarily authoritative enough to end the line of inquiry altogether, but apparently not tonight.

“Well I wouldn’t, Linda. I wouldn’t like a change of subject, and for that matter...” (Richard, elongated as though he forgot Linda and Harlan…)

“How boring,” Ransom said in an aside. Marta happened to be walking by, picking up Richard’s emptied drink, and Joni’s recently downed one. It wasn’t actually her job to provide maid service for these people but they seemed to expect it and Harlan encouraged it and they really were so generous.

So it was to Marta that Ransom delivered his aside, though it wasn’t really to her—it might as well have been to the drink cart, or the grandfather clock, or the nonexistent camera over his shoulder. Ransom was the sort of man who walked around as though there could always be a camera over his shoulder. In fairness, Ransom was also the sort of man cameras commonly followed around. He’d very nearly committed to at least two reality tv shows, mostly to annoy his family. He’d gotten his current sports car upon backing out of a reality tv show. It was too bad he was too old to start a YouTube channel. He was still waiting to see what he could get out of revealing Jacob’s channel to the family, whether it would be better to threaten Jacob with its reveal to his parents, his parents with its reveal to to the family, or perhaps the family as a whole with a leak to… whatever random book-related website might find that gossip interesting. Maybe just Reddit.

Marta was just about to respond, to perhaps engage Ransom in conversation. She had it on good authority--Harlan’s--that she could be good company to a Thrombey or a Drysdale. Everyone seemed rather wary of Ransom, but aside from his aversion to the dogs, Marta had no reason to think ill of him, and so tried to assume the best of him. And---she could admit somewhat blushingly---he certainly wasn’t unattractive. She could see how, in her younger, sillier days how she might nurse a bit of crush on him, the wealthy prince charming and the maid---although she was not a maid, no matter how they treated her, she was a well-trained professional, dammit---

But before she could speak, Ransom’s face suddenly underwent some sort squishing, snorting motion. His long nose scrunched up short as he took in a sharp sniff, nearly a snort. His eyes closed for a moment, and a smile played on his lips. “This’ll be fuhh-hun,” he said in half a whisper, airy breathing infusing and interrupting his murmur.

Marta tilted her head to the side, curious what Ransom could be referring to, until she saw his nose, which was twitching: once, then twice. A heavy sniff, then another, then two in a row, then a long one, for all the world like fanning a flame (a flame, as she would come to realize, to light a fuse, to burn down to an explosion...)

It was around this moment that Ransom abruptly stood, and she could not help but notice how broad his shoulders were, as his eyes fluttered, and his chest began to swell. His nose was starting to pinken around the nostrils, the flaring and scrunching continuing, his arms falling slack. The creak of his chair as he stood brought everyone’s attention towards him, and as they noticed the bizarre ritual Ransom was performing or enduring.

“Oh, god, Ransom, not this again…” (Linda, eyes rolling)

“Ransom, Ransom buddy, Ransom please...” (Richard, hands waving)

“Is he going to do that screaming thing again, I’m leaving the room---” (Joni, hands raising towards her ears)

“Leaving the room won’t do her much good.” (Harlan, with a bit of a snicker in his voice)

Ransom was starting to vocalize now, little “hehhhH… hEHHHhh…” sounds that sounded as though they were either being dragged out of him or as though he was dragging them out himself, perhaps both. His head was tilting back, that chest looking larger than ever as it stretched and air flowed in and his long nose scrunched and his mouth hung open in a tall O and his back arched and hands went over ears and then one last voiceless gasp in… “huuuUUHH!”

“HHHHEEYYY-SSHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!” 

Ransom sprang forward, giving vent to what was plainly a titanic sneeze to begin with, let alone his leaning into it, relishing it, and then on top of that, as the sneeze went on it seemed to turn into a pure, guttural yell, his voice roughening in an obviously voluntary way. It sounded as though the sort of scream one might hear on a hardcore metal record was riding the rails of an involuntary, massive rush of air, and Marta couldn’t help but frown as a visible spray was ejected from Ransom’s face along with the helter skelter noise, but she could hardly notice the spray since, standing closest to the blast, her ears were assaulted worst with Ransom’s screaming sneeze or sneeze-flavored scream, whatever it was, and she dearly wished she’d followed the family’s example and plugged her ears.

The sneeze tapered off at last, and Ransom--who’d doubled over with the blast--bounced back up, face reddened from exertion, practically beaming. Or at least he would have been beaming, were his nose not already scrunching…

“Whew! Big wuhh-hunn…” He was presumably celebrating his sneeze, congratulating himself on a “big one” although the urge had not yet left him entirely, and it seemed another sneeze was one its way. Joni was just walking back into the room as he went into his sniffing routine again.

“Jesus! Ransom you’re gonna give your grandfather a heart attack…” she huffed, before seeing him building towards another sneeze, spinning on her heel and promptly marching out of the room again.

(Harlan, for his part, was chuckling.)

“S-suhh… sorry guys, think I gotta sn-sneeze again…” he warned, breath catching as he actively tilted his head back, presumably seeking some sort of light to look into. His eyes were tearing slightly as he fanned one hand in the general direction of his nose, perhaps… attempting to spark another sneeze by fanning dust at himself? He smiled as he could the whole way, clearly enjoying this performance.

“What the hell, kiddo, didn’t we tell you about your whole yelling routine…” Richard grumbled, making a move to walk towards Ransom but clearly thinking better of it as Ransom’s breath caught yet again.

“Ransom!” His mother interjected. 

“You’re not a kid, you get allergy shots, I don’t know why you put on this whole production…” (Richard again)

“Ransom stop that this instant, you know the neighbors called the police last time they thought someone was in here being murdered.” (Linda)

“Shh, shh, shh, you’ll make it go away… ooh, I can feel it…” (Ransom, giggling)

The rest of them were rolling their eyes, plugging their ears, shuffling away from the scene---Marta heard a door slam, clearly Joni wasn’t risking being within the house for Ransom’s next explosion.

Meanwhile Ransom seemed to have clinched the sneeze, no longer trying to coax it out but surrendering to it, preparing for it, getting ready to ride the wave and rattle the rafters… he held up his hand, and put his fingers down one by one, his giggling nearly putting him off his sneeze again as he counted down to the sneeze: five fingers, four, three, two... and just as he had one finger left up, he gave another of those great airy voiceless pulls with his flared nostrils and slack mouth and…

“EEEYYYYYYYYAAAA-SSSHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

This one was less a heavy metal growl and more a pure scream, perhaps inspired by his mother’s mention of murder, as it bent higher pitched towards the end, and Marta couldn’t help but think she wouldn’t have imagined such a large man could reach such a high pitch.

Once again Ransom pitched forward, staying bent over, hands over his face this time as he pushed out the sneeze, dragging it out beyond all necessity, but clearly enjoying it. He popped up again, “whew! Think I got the itch out that time!” He said, beaming like a child pleased to have gotten away with something naughty, before he screwed his face up again, “W-well, I think I got it…”

“Ransom, stop it, I know you’re just putting it on this time, I can tell.” Linda said, although this time she was chuckling a bit. Harlan was outright laughing, although he rolled his eyes as he said “you’ve outdone yourself.”

Marta had prepared adequately for this one, fingers plugging her ears, but she was still rather distracted by the whole affair. She’d never seen anyone sneeze quite so dramatically. Still, he seemed to have some measure of control over the whole affair; standing behind him, she couldn’t help but notice the sheen of his hands, practically glistening with the moisture from the sneeze, before he wiped them roughly on his pants. Clearly this sneeze had been much… juicier, she thought with an alarmed frown. Ransom must have anticipated that, ergo the hands tented around his nose as he’d howled out that last sneeze. 

“You done yelling at us, buddy?” Richard asked, clearly irritated. His son had managed to take up even more space than he did, after all. Practically took up all the space in the house; certainly there wasn’t a room in the house (or on the grounds altogether, practically) that Ransom’s sneezes couldn’t be heard. 

“Yeah Dad, sorry.” Ransom said, his childish grin replaced with a more adolescent smirk, his eyes cutting over towards the couch where his father sat. “Just had a tickle in my nose.” His voice grew brighter, though no less mocking, as he looked over at Marta, who once again could have been a drink cart, a grandfather clock, a camera for all it mattered. He tilted his head at her, and adopted what might have been a boyish pout (if his face weren’t so smug) to say:

 “Allergies, you know. I can’t help it.”

[eviesmyspiritanimal]

We Are Off to See the Wizard Part 5

Summary: Audrey’s Annual Halloween Bash is coming up, and Evie has thought of a rather interesting costume idea for the Core Four. Several of their friends get pulled into the epiphany, too. It’s super fluffy with Huma, Jaudrey, Bal, Jarlos, Core Four fluff, and Mal and Hades father/daughter feels.

  “There! An absolutely gorgeous Dorothy that everyone is going to be positively taken by,” Evie smiled sweetly as she spun Mal around in the office chair so that she could see what Evie had done to her.

  Mal’s eyes widened as she studied what Evie had done with her face. She couldn’t help but huff a breathless chuckle as she grinned at her favorite bluenette. Evie bent down and squeezed her gently as she looked into Mal’s eyes through the mirror.

  “It looks… Pretty good,” Mal complimented Evie’s handiwork as she focused on the small details that Evie had put onto her eyelids.

  Evie just hugged her a bit tighter in response, sisterly love practically oozing off of her in that manner that came so naturally to the taller girl.

  Uma rolled her eyes at the both of them and moved so that she was leaning against the headboard, the bed creaking as she shifted her position on the mattress. Her eyes widened a bit as she accidentally drew very unwanted attention to herself. Evie arose from her spot leaned against Mal’s shoulders and head and turned to the pirate with a wicked smile.

  “Sit down in my parlor,” Evie told her with a pish-posh sort of voice, her hands folded in front of her against her dress as she eyed Uma and calmly helped Mal up from the chair. Mal smirked as she looked at Uma.

  Mal smiled wickedly at Uma, but the pirate just looked back at her with a shrug and a carefree grin of her own. Mal raised an eyebrow, somewhat taken off guard by Uma’s unexpected laissez-faire. Uma just kept that mysteriously contented look on her face as her and Mal switched places.

  Evie turned her so that she was facing the bed and so that she could inspect her more easily.

  “I texted Harry and Gil and told them to come,” Uma informed Evie, her voice perfectly calm and having no trace of the nervous anticipation that it should have had. Evie nodded her head as she sifted through the many makeup supplies in the vanity.

  “Cool,” she replied, trailing off as a perplexed expression found its way onto her face. After a few moments, she arose to look at the other two girls.

  “Where’s my green face paint?” Evie questioned. Mal shrugged, looking around the room from newly acquired spot where Uma had been lounged just a moment ago as she texted her father as she had promised Audrey she would.

  “I know where it is,” Uma suddenly announced. Evie turned to gaze at her expectantly. Uma grinned widely.

  “It’s lost,” Uma cackled. Evie huffed and rolled her eyes, quickly returning to her search. Mal raised an eyebrow, noticing that Uma still had that almost sly sort of expression on her face. The green-eyed girl couldn’t help but think that the pirate must have hidden Evie’s green makeup somewhere in an attempt to avoid being painted on.

  Mal wordlessly searched through the hulking mass of blue pillows underneath her, feeling for the large container of blindingly green face and body paint. She was disappointed to not find anything, but she did not give up so easily. She moved so that her top half was hanging off the bed and she gazed beneath the frame.

  To her immense satisfaction, she spotted the container in all of its nearly glowing green glory.

  “E, I found it,” Mal told the bluenette with a very much pleased grin on her face as she withdrew the container and offered it to Evie.

  She turned quickly from her searching to see what Mal had and she smiled widely as she took it from her best friend.

  “Thank you so very much!” Evie praised, patting Mal’s cheek sweetly. Mal just smiled back like the good pet that she was, and eyed Uma with righteous self-satisfaction in her gaze. The pirate returned her gaze with an expression that seemed almost as if she would murder her in her sleep.

  Evie turned back to Uma and removed the lid from the container of paint before putting a large amount of the green on a pad.

  “Okay, close your eyes,” Evie warned before immediately launching into slathering the green stuff all over Uma’s cheeks. Uma furrowed her brows at the feel of the wet paint on her face and she frowned.

  “Don’t move your mouth. It’ll work better if your face is as still as possible,” Evie instructed as she swiftly worked. Uma set her jaw but remained mostly silent aside from a heavy sigh of disdain.

  After a moment, the pirate felt the most unpleasant sensation of itching on her face. She instinctually brought her hand up to scratch her face and flinched when her hand was slapped away.

  “Don’t do that! You’ll mess it up. It’s the perfect thickness right now,” Evie informed her. Uma raised an eyebrow at that statement, but nevertheless tried her best to keep her hand out of the way. She didn’t want to have to go through this horrifying procedure again.

  Evie worked quietly and Mal moved behind her to watch.

  The green-eyed girl carefully observed Evie’s gentle yet frequent strokes, somewhat fascinated by the artwork that was currently Uma’s face as the wetness slowly dried while Evie layered it. The bluenette remained working, but she gazed up at Mal for a moment with a smile.

  “It’s kind of like her face is a canvas. A big, fat canvas,” Mal finally spoke, and smirked triumphantly upon noticing Uma’s obvious unappreciation of her comment. She stepped back in time with the kick poorly aimed in her general direction.

  “Shut up,” Uma spoke, barely moving her lips in an attempt to avoid being scolded again for possibly messing up Evie’s paint job.

  There was a knock at the door before Uma could make any more efforts to get revenge on the faerie, and Mal moved over to the door and opened it.

  Jay, Carlos, Harry, and Gil were all standing just outside, and Mal smiled awkwardly at the lot of them.

  “That looks nice,” Carlos complimented, immediately acknowledging her makeup.

  “Thanks,” Mal expressed, stepping to the side and allowing the four boys to pour through the door into the room.

  Almost immediately, Harry noticed Uma sitting there with her back to the boys, Evie intently focused on her face. The Hook boy stepped closer, thinking that he would surprise his girlfriend with a kiss. Before anyone could warn him otherwise, he closed the distance and delivered an upside-down kiss to her forehead.

  He pulled away quickly, wiping his mouth and furrowing his brow in disgust. Evie squeaked, looking entirely offended as she gaped at Harry. However, her anger at him quickly melted away at the sight of his lips covered in green.

  “Good. Now you’ve got lipstick to go with your eyeshadow,” Jay sarcastically commented with a raise of his eyebrow. Harry shot him a miffed look as he emphatically wiped the gooey paint away from his face.

  “Ew! Ye coulda warned a guy!”

  “Well, we didn’t exactly know that an idiot was going to waltz in here and put his mouth all in this goop. I’ve told you to quit playing in my makeup,” Uma told him, chuckling as she tried to keep a straight face. Evie was shakily attempting to reapply the makeup on Uma’s forehead and at the same time desperately willing away the giggles that were working to overtake her.

  “Bloody Hades, what is this stuff?!” Harry cried, still trying to wipe the thin coating off of his lips.

  “You might as well leave it alone, Harry, since you’re going to match Uma when I’m done,” Evie told him, and Harry paled, his eyes going wide.

  Uma grinned, cutting her eyes in Harry’s direction.

  “Hear that, Hook? You’re gonna be the Wicked Witch of the West, too,” Uma huffed, actually kind of looking forward to seeing him looking like a witch.

  “No, no. He’s going to be one of your guards,” Evie told her. Harry raised an eyebrow, simultaneously curious and very afraid. Gil laughed excitedly, almost hopping in place as he hurried over to the bluenette.

  “What do I get to be?!” Gil exclaimed in his enthrallment. Evie smiled at him, humoring his sweet enthusiasm for her entire project.

  “You’re going to be a winged primate,” Evie informed him slowly, and Gil suddenly looked very dreamy as he considered the whole prospect.

  “I don’t know what that is, but it sounds really cool!” Gil replied. Uma rolled her eyes.

  “Yeah, Gil. It’s really cool. As cool as a flying monkey even.”

  “I wish I could be a flying monkey,” Gil expressed. Harry and Uma shared a glance, groaning at Gil’s denseness.

  “So, Evie, why did you want me and Jay to come?” Carlos innocently questioned, and Jay swiftly smacked the back of his head. “OW, dude! What was that for?”

  “Don’t remind her! We still have time to escape!” Jay whispered, but quickly straightened and forced a causal look on his face when Evie stopped in her work on Uma to look at him with a sickeningly sweet smile.

  “You’re going to be the Tin-Man, and you’re going to be the lion,” Evie pointed at each of them respectively, purposefully leaving out the fact that Carlos was going to be a cowardly sort of lion.

  “Cool!” Carlos grinned, obviously pleased with his costume, and Jay simply groaned as he plopped down on the bed, crashing down on Mal’s legs. Mal squeaked in response, a little shocked by the sudden weight on her.

  “Dang, bro, talk about a belly-flop,” Mal commented and Jay just relaxed more, allowing his entire body to just spread its heaviness on her limbs.

  “You’re going to kill me and my legs are going to lose feeling and fall off my body,” Mal dramatically declared, and Jay steamrolled her legs back and forth in response.

  “Since when did you become such a drama queen?” Jay asked her.

  “Since she decided that I tortured her,” Evie informed him, pursing her lips mischievously as Mal glared at her half-heartedly.

  “Oh,” Mal drug the note out for a moment, “bite me.”

  “That’s not ladylike,” Evie rebuked her kindly and with one last stroke of the pad, pulled away from her intent work on Uma’s face. Everyone moved so that they could see what Uma looked like. Uma opened her eyes to gaze at the lot of them and raised an eyebrow.

  “What’s everybody staring at me for?” For a few moments, no one uttered a word until Gil finally spoke up in a scream of terror.

  “Where’d Uma go?! SHE’S MISSING!!!”

[g0dblessthefandom]

Brittana Valentine’s Semi AU (Updated Daily Until Valentine’s Day) February 4, 2017

This is supposed to be 1k, 1.5k words TOPS. I am trying to shave it down so I can get the chapters out sooner, but I have no idea what I'm doing. Halp. 

February 4, 2017

Brittany dialed Mercedes telephone number again and listened to the line ring. She had called a few times earlier in the day, but she’d most likely been in rehearsals, and too busy to answer her phone. Now it was getting closer to five, and she knew for a fact that they like to break in time for dinner. The phone rang a few more times and finally went to voicemail. She didn’t bother leaving a message because Mercedes didn’t check them anyway, but she pulled the phone away from her face, and began stabbing at the keyboard.

I know you can see this, Jones, and I’m expecting a call back soon. We need to talk!!!!!!

She looked down at the phone, frowned and erased a few of the exclamation marks. She didn’t want to rage at Mercedes. Honestly, she didn’t want to rage against anyone. But there was something about knowing that Santana was out there, just, existing in the same city with her at the same time that made her unsteady.

She’d been telling the truth. She didn’t hate Santana. There was a time right after she’d come to the city when she was sure that she could have, but the feeling never really took over. She was disappointed, sure. She’d been really sad. She’d been angry. But, she hadn’t hated Santana. In fact, she probably loved her more than ever when she’d first arrived. Santana had always been someone that she wanted to protect from the worst the world had to offer. She was someone who needed to be dealt with softly and gently, and loved through the worst of it all. But, there was something about the way that things got worse and worse between the two of them as the standoff about who would move where lengthed. And instead of feeling like protecting Santana, she’d imagined her hurting as much as she’d been hurting. It was a startling feeling, and one that made Brittany hate herself for a while. Then they’d cut off contact, and slowly, very slowly, she’d started feeling like she could one day be whole again. It was slow going, and there were still nights where she cried herself to sleep after drinking a whole bottle of cheap wine. In the meantime, though, she still had Mercedes, and Sugar, and she knew she could count on them.

Which made the more recent situation all the more infuriating. She knew that they were doing what they thought was best. They couldn’t imagine a world without Brittana, and they wanted to help Santana. But for Brittany, she was feeling more steamrolled than supported.

She put down her phone, and shouted out the open door. “Jane, are you still out there?”

Brittany rarely had office hours on Saturday, but she’d come in for a few hours to help a graduate student with her dissertation. She wouldn’t have asked Jane in too, but there was some correspondence she wanted to catch up on, and in the end it only ended up being about two hours. She wouldn’t have begrudged the other woman leaving early, though. There were definitely better ways to spend your Saturday afternoon than at work.

There was a shuffling, and she rounded her desk, leaning out of the office. She rolled her eyes when she saw Jane wasn’t alone, but was looking rather disheveled, and quickly buttoning her shirt while her girlfriend sat on the desk, a satisfied grin on her face.

“Hey, Britt!” Sugar said, enthusiastically.

“Sugar, c’mon, you can’t be here distracting Jane while she’s at work. We’ve talked about this.”

“I know, Britt.” Sugar whined. “But, I’ve been out of town for a week, and that’s a long time to go without seeing my boo. I can’t help that I missed this sweetness.”

With that she leaned down and planted a kiss on Jane’s cheek, nuzzling her softly.

Brittany rolled her eyes. “Not during office hours, Sugar.”

Sugar hopped off the desk and saluted. “You got it, friend-o.” She put an arm around Brittany’s shoulder. “What’s going on with you these days? I heard you’ve got a visitor in town-”

Brittany caught the tail end of Jane’s ���cut it out’ gesture, but the damage was already done. She shook Sugar’s arm off her shoulder, and pointed an accusing finger in her direction.

“Yeah, and thanks for giving me the heads up, Sugar. You know, I can’t believe you and Mercedes, springing this on me.”

Sugar put up her hands. “Look, I’m just as surprised as you. If you remember correctly, I flew up to Toronto a whole eight days ago to do some work for the label. I had no hand in this.”

“Yeah, but you acted all weird when I had to move our lunch date cause I had other plans.”

“Well, you ditched me, Pierce. How was supposed to act?” Sugar shrugged nonchalantly. “Anyway, that’s all under the bridge, all right? I didn’t invite her, but she’s here now, and we should figure out how we’re going to deal.”

“We? Oh no. Both you and Mercedes can stay out of this. It’s none of your business.”

Sugar looked offended. “None of our business. Well, excuse me! It’s not like both Mercedes and I have spent the last year listening to you both complain about how stubborn the other one was.”

“Sugar the only thing you spent the last year doing is alternating between making sure that I was over Santana so you could make your move and giving me a hard time for letting someone, and I quote, ‘so earth smashingly hot’ get away from me.”

Sugar smiled uncomfortably, and walked over to Jane, placing a kiss on her forehead. “This was all long before you, babe.”

“I’m long over your weird obsession with Santana.” Jane waved her off and turned her attention back towards Brittany.  “The point is Brittany, this is a chance to finally talk about what happened. I’m sure Santana came here to get you back, and while you might not get back together, you can at least end the whole thing as friends. From what Sugar’s told me, you two used to be really close.”

Brittany looked off distantly. “Yeah, we were best friends all through high school. There was a time when I couldn’t think of my life without her.”

“Well, what happened?”

“I dunno, Jane. Something got in the way.”

“And aren’t you at all curious as to what that could be? If you really cared about each other, it might be worth it. That’s what I think anyway.”

“Babe, hey babe. If I moved to LA, would you follow me?” Sugar said, waggling her eyebrows significantly.

“Sugar, I wouldn’t follow you if you moved across town.”

Sugar clutched at her heart and leaned across the desk until she was nearly falling off. “Hashtag, savage!”

Jane laughed and grabbed Sugar’s hand, bringing it to her chest. “I’m going to shove off, boss, and show this nerd how much I missed her. You need anything else before I go?”

“No, Jane, it’s fine. I just wanted to make sure I hadn’t missed a call from Mercedes. I can’t help but get the feeling she’s avoiding me.”

“Actually, I can answer that one boss.” Sugar said. “Tonight the cast is going out for some sweet, sweet bonding time, and I doubt they’ll be done until late.”

“And how do you know that?”

“This is the reason you need an Instagram, Britt. You’d be up on all the happenings.” Sugar pulled out her phone and scrolled through some pictures. She turned the phone to Brittany, and there was an Instagram post tagging most of the cast, and Mercedes as well, looking like they were having a great time.

“Fine. I’m heading out too, then. No reason for me to stick around here any longer than I have to.”

“Well, well, well. Does that mean you’ve got plans, Dr. Pierce? Another date perhaps?” Sugar asked slyly.

“Another instance of things being none of your business more like it.”

“Fiiiinnnneee. I won’t get involved. Come on, babe, I’ve got us a reservation at the swankiest hotel in Manhattan. I think I deserve it for having to listen to Justin Bieber wine for the past eight days.”

She reached for Jane’s hand, and lead her out the door. Jane set a wave over her shoulder, and a moment later, Brittany was alone.

\

This was their fifth date, and Brittany was still not sure what to wear when they went out. Clark was a nice enough guy. His mom, Dr. Susan Gerber, was a teacher in the physics department, and had introduced them one day when he’d come to pick her up for their monthly lunch “date”. She had her concerns, but he seemed like a nice enough guy, and they’d hit it off. So, she wasn’t surprised when he texted her a week later, and asked if she wanted to see a movie. It was fun, and she’d like him so she agreed to see him again.

To be fair, this wasn’t her first date since she’d left LA. She’d had a couple, with both guys and girls, and some had even ended up with the two of them tangled up in bed sheets the next morning. But they had all felt like they were scratching an itch. She rarely even contacted them again. But Clark felt different. He felt safe.

It didn’t hurt that he was a highly successful surgeon at one of the best hospitals in the city. It wasn’t even like he bragged about it. Brittany had only found out when she’d stopped by Dr. Gerber’s office, and seen a photo of him in his scrubs, hanging from her wall. Of course, it did have it’s drawbacks. He’d warned her that he might have to cancel without warning, and it had happened once already, but it was a risk they were willing to take.

So, one date had turned into two and then three and then more, and before you knew it, they were calling each other, and he’d even sent her flowers. She hadn’t bothered to introduce him to her friends yet. There wasn’t really a point. They’d have been surprised, and maybe a little confused, but in the end, she was sure they’d support her. At least she hoped so. So, maybe she wasn’t as confident as she thought she was when it came to her friends supporting her new relationship, it wasn’t the end of the world.

But Clark was a nice guy. He took her to night restaurants, and shows, and once he even took her to an animal shelter, and they got to hang out with a bunch of puppies and kittens, so she’d had a blast. There was definitely something reliable about him, and Brittany liked it. She wasn’t sure how far they’d go together, but she was enjoying herself and that’s what mattered.

He’d invited her to a club on his side of town, and Brittany was only too happy to go. She was a sucker for a song with a good beat, and it had been way too long since she’d danced late into the night. So, she’d caught a cab from her place, and arrived at the club, excited to get the night started. She was settling up to the bar when her phone buzzed.

Clark: Hey, I’m on my way, but got held up at the hospital. I should be there in about half an hour. Sorry about that.

No problem. I’ll see you when you get here.

There was a short pause, and then her phone vibrated again.

Awesome, can’t wait to see you.

Brittany took another sip, and scanned the club. It wasn’t one that she’d been to before, but she knew the type. Tonight seemed to be 80’s night (if the retro clothing folks were wearing was any indication), and the music was taking her nostalgia town. She bobbed her head to the music and suddenly she realized someone was watching her closely.

The brunette was only a couple of feet down the bar, but she kept her eyes on Brittany. When Brittany smiled, she made her way over, and stuck out a hand.

“Hi! I’m Renee!”

Brittany took her hand with a smirk. “Brittany.”

The music was loud, but they shouted a little to make themselves heard. Brittany rather enjoyed the way Renee had to lean in close to talk to her. She could smell her perfume, no doubt dabbed behind her ears. Her skin was a rich, deep brown, and Brittany couldn’t help but think she’d never seen a more gorgeous skin tone in her life.

“I know this sounds like a cheesy pick up line, but what are you doing here all alone, Brittany?”

Brittany laughed. “Well, yeah, I’m waiting on a friend, actually. But he’s late.”

“His loss.”

“Actually…” Brittany smiled. “I was thinking I could use a dance partner. Just until he gets here of course.”

“Oh, of course.” Renee wrapped an arm about Brittany’s and pulled her towards the dancefloor.

Brittany was surprised at how good of a dancer Renee was. There weren’t many people who could keep up with her once she got going, but the other woman was doing well, and looking amazing in the process. Before she knew it quite a few songs had passed and she was ready for a break.

“Wanna grab a drink?” Renee yelled over the music.

“I dunno.” She pulled her phone out of her pocket. No new messages, and it had been nearly half an hour since Clark’s last text. “My friend should be coming soon.”

Renee rubbed her arm playfully. “Come on, we won’t be far, and we can wait for him to get here.”

Brittany thought about it for a moment longer. “Okay, as long as we don’t go far.

Renee’s smile beamed again, and she lead Brittany off the dance floor. But instead of heading to the bar, Renee pulled her towards the back of the bar. The volume of the music lessened and they could almost speak in a normal tone.

“Where are we going?”

“I’m here with some friends, and we’ve got a bar going in the back. Open bar. It’s kind of a private party, but as long as you’re with me, you’re good.”

“With you?” Brittany laughed.

“You know what I mean.”

“Suuuuure.” She followed Renee through one door and then down a long hallway. “So, what is this party you’ve got going on. Must be a big deal to have the whole back of the club to yourself.”

“It’s kind of like a bonding exercise. Our producer made us do it. Not that I’m complaining. An open bar, is an open bar.”

A faint glimmer of recognition played at the edges of Brittany’s consciousness as Renee pulled her through the hallway and through another door, but she ignored it. Her phone, however, caught her attention as it buzzed again.

Clark: Sorry, Brittany, I’m stuck with another case. I’m going to have to cancel. It came up at the last minute, right as I was heading out the door. I’m so sorry, but I promise I will make it up to you soon.

The high that Brittany had been feeling drained away from her quickly. She didn’t have the right to be disappointed, she really didn’t, but the last thing she wanted right now was to be alone.  

She put an arm around Renee. “Thanks for inviting me back here, I think I’ll hang out after-”

“Britt?!”

Brittany turned, and was surprised to see Mercedes there. “Mercedes, what are you doing here?”

Renee seemed surprised too. “‘Cedes, how do you know my new friend?”

Mercedes looked between the two of them for a second, and the light seemed to go on in her head. “Oh, no, Renee, you’re not putting the moves on this one, she’s off limits.” She took Brittany’s arm from around the other woman before either could say a word, and shooed her away.

“Hey! Mercedes-”

“Nope, go find some other one tonight.”

Her voice was playful, but firm, and Renee went on her way. Brittany was a little miffed, though.

“Mercedes, why would you do that? We weren’t doing anything anyway, just dancing, and she was going to buy me a drink.”

“I’m sure it was all very innocent, but I don’t want you getting involved with her. Or with anybody in my company.”

“I’m not getting involved. I was on a date, but the guy stood me up, so I decided to have some fun.”

Mercedes looked at her for a moment. “Somebody stood you up?”

“Yeah, just a friend of mine, it’s nothing serious. Anyway, he gets pretty busy sometimes and- What are you looking for?”

Her friend was quickly looking around the room for someone, or something, and looked guiltily back at Brittany for a moment. “Nothing? Just, you know, scanning the peripheral. Always have to have good situational awareness and all that.”

“You’re lying, ‘Cedes.”

Mercedes rolled her eyes. “Okay, maybe I am, but I’m trying to save you some trouble, so don’t go making a big deal out of it.”

“What is it?” Brittany pulled gently on her arm. “Let me hang out, Mercedes, please? I’ll be totally cool, and I’ll only give lap dances if you want me to.”

Britt…”

“Please, Mercedes?”

“Santana’s coming.”

The words washed over her like a cold shock, but she adjusted quickly. “So? It’s not like I’m going to kill her if I see her. We’re allowed to be in the same room as each other. We can be civil.”

“It’s not that, Britt, it’s just I won’t want you to be uncomfortable. At all. I know you two haven’t really have a chance to talk, and that might make it tough for you to hang out together.”

“Mercedes, we dated since high school. How many years is that? Like, a decade? We may not be together anymore, but if there’s one thing we can do, it’s get along.”

“Are you sure?” Mercedes looked closely at her friend to try and see if there was any indecision behind her eyes.

“I’m sure. Trust me.”

Brittany put on her brightest smile, and nodded to strengthen her point. Maybe it was the music, or the dancing, or getting ditched, but there was something in her that was almost looking forward to seeing Santana. As if the initial impact of her being in town had worn off, and now they actually might be getting to the place where they could be in the same room together and not explode at each other. Of course, it had only been a day since their last fight, but Brittany was feeling optimistic.

Mercedes sat her down at a table, and went to go fetch some drinks. The music was pumping back here too, but at a lower volume that made talking a lot more enjoyable. She introduced herself to a couple of her tablemates, and listened to some of the embarrassing stories they’d collected about Mercedes during their time in the show.

She was laughing at a particularly entertaining anecdote about Mercedes and her crush on the guy that was helping to produce the studio album, when suddenly there was a small voice by her elbow.

“Hey, Brittany.”

She jumped at the sound of Santana’s voice but settled quickly before turning to her.

“Santana, hey. I, um, wasn’t expecting you so quickly.”

“Yeah, Mercedes told me you were here, and I thought maybe I should not come at all. But I was pretty close, so, yeah. But, if you want me to leave, I will. No pressure.”

“No!” Brittany reddened at the desperation in her voice. “I just mean, it’s fine, San. I don’t want you to go. I mean, you don’t have to go if you don’t want to.”

She moved over a bit, and gestured towards the seat. “Please, sit down.”

There was a moment of hesitation from Santana, but she did sit finally, maintaining a bit of distance between them.

“This is kind of a cool party.” Santana said, nervously.

“Yeah, apparently they do this once a month. It’s new to me, but everybody seems really nice.”

Mercedes approached with a few drinks, warily eyeing the two as she came closer to the table.

“Santana! You came. That’s… well, it’s not what I was expecting, but I’m glad. Is, um, is everything cool with the two of you?”

Brittany sighed. “I told you, I am perfectly capable of being civil, Mercedes.”

“I know, I know. I just wanted to make sure. Santana, I brought you a drink. Nothing too heavy, though. And Britt, this is your favorite one. It’s even got one of those little umbrellas that you like so much. It’s probably got about twelve hundred calories, but I know you’re going to dance them all off, so enjoy.”

She plopped a small glass in front of Santana, and the bigger glass (which indeed had an umbrella on top, as well as a slice of pineapple, a lemon wedge, and coconut shavings) in front of Brittany who reached for it eagerly.

“This is kind of nice. Reminds me of my second time in undergrad.” Santana said, sipping her drink.

Brittany couldn’t help but agree.

This is a fic that will update everyday until Valentine’s Day 2017. To truly enjoy please put on (Sweet Sweet Baby) Since You’ve Been Gone by Aretha Franklin. :P

FF.net link and Ao3 link.