#There are options for everyone!
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seeing posts dismissing the fertility/body awareness method for not getting pregnant and its like........its actually something you need to learn and plan for not something you can just pick up. The reason birth control and condoms are so effective are bc they cut down on human mistakes/error. With FAM you need to track 2-3 different things almost daily to know when you absolutely need to use a condom to prevent conception and days where it is fine to not use a condom bc youre nowhere near ovulation.
yes use condoms and birth control if you WANT TO, but if you dont want to use condoms or birth control INVEST in to the fertility awareness method, and i really mean mentally and physically invest into the system.
Fertility/body awareness is a TOOL! for you to not get pregnant or for you to increase your chances of getting pregnant, for you to track your cycles, or pcos, or transition into menopause, or to see if youve/about to miscarry
Being in the birth work field has opened my whole brain to things most ppl dont know of, and most people dont know the hows or whys behind fertility/body awareness. Its ok if you personally dont trust something you dont understand, or feel like it wouldn't work for your health. But truly FAM is a huge topic and you should be educated on what it is before discounting the science behind a certain contraceptive method.
#me#personal#vent#im not gonna get into my health or sex life but please stop dismissing the fertility awareness method#Many people dont want to be pregnant but also dont want to be on birth control or wear condoms and thats ok!#There are options for everyone!#And if its not for you congrats! but you know whats not for a lot of ppl? bc and barrier methods#some ppl dont have access some ppl cant use bc for health issues and some ppl have sensory issues with barriers#and some people just choose not to use either bc they dont want to#Stop being weird and shaming ppl for their choices esp bc youre not educating and expanding access to others
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do genuinely find it fascinating how indeed.com is like the biggest job-hunting website out there and yet manages to be profoundly useless in every possible way
#i'm not even being bitchy i'm just genuinely bewildered by it.#like everyone will need to search for a job at some point in their life#and everyone will need to use a job-hunting website to do it#so why are there so few options and why are they all so awful
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“these characters should be mentally healthy before they get together 😌” ummm no I actually think we should smash their mental illnesses together like clumps of play-doh and see what colors it makes
#they should live under each other’s skin in a way that’s weird to everyone else. actually.#also on a more serious note since this is getting notes mental illness does not preclude people from deserving love#or the ability to give and receive it#it also does not make you inherently toxic#sometimes people are just toxic anyways of course#and a lot of people enjoy a toxic ship and are relating that to this and that’s cool!#but like#if you believe that’s the only option you’re wrong buddy#people can be worse together but they can also be better#acting like a character or a person has to ‘fix’ their trauma or what have you to be worthy is. a fucking weird mindset.#but anyways!
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as my own direct immediate list of game grievances i hate that stardew valley expects you to side against a wheelchair user who is upset that he was moved without his consent. i hate that the mass effect trilogy gives you visible scarring as a direct result of choosing mean dialogue and heals it if you're nice. i hate that the vampire the masquerade ttrpg has a monstrous player class that can appear as horrible vampiric monsters or as visibly disabled people and both of these appearances are mechanically the same. i hate that dark souls games have a difficulty level implemented in a way that cannot be adjusted for disability. i hate that i can play as a mermaid or a werewolf or a horse in the sims games but can't use a wheelchair. i hate that the ace attorney games have so much flashing and not all of the games can disable it. i hate that disability is constantly something that happens to teach a lesson, i hate that disability is something that happens as a punishment, i hate that disability is either compensated perfectly with no drawbacks or something that is endlessly sought to be cured. i hate that no character customization will ever include the mobility aids i use, that the player avatars that represent me will never look like me. i am so goddamn annoyed and so goddamn tired.
#this is about disability specifically i know there are lackluster diversity options across all marginalized identities#i am talking about this one because it is pissing me off specifically right now.#and this is not about modding. not all games are pc and not every pc game is moddable and not everyone knows how to mod.#patch me through to palaven command
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reblog to give ur mutuals a soft lil kissy on the head
#i can't reblog this from everyone so this is just me giving all my mutuals a soft lil kissy on the head#if u see this#*muah*#soft lil kissy on the head#and if u don't want one u can have a head pat#or i can lovingly send soft lovey vibes your way#all options are valid#idk i just#need to spread some love today#i'm tired and sad and stressed#so i'm giving u all some love#bc i need to fill myself with more of it#love u all hope u have/are having a good day#mutuals#not stargate
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Actually I think Veilguard should include an option where your inquisitior was romancing Solas but it's been 10 years now and she's settled down with a nice guy named Garry. You get to design Garry but no matter what Garry shows up. He's really boring and he talks about fire safety all the time. Idk man I think that'd be really fucking funny.
#datv#dragon age#also funny cos they dont wanna give us too many choices for previous worldstates#just piss people off more#piss me off more#make this an option for everyone
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my experience in fields of mistria so far
#fields of mistria#vaniper#valen#juniper#art#i'm glad everyone sees the vision#i need this game to have a poly option so bad#because how could i ever separate them
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You don't wish your disability was worse or more visible, you wish your disability was taken seriously. Please stop confusing the two, I guarantee you would not get the support you need JUST by being more severe or more visible. Please listen to visibly disabled people when we tell you it isn't better on our side
#m/cc#mine#I tried extremely hard to word this nicely because I KNOW people don't mean bad and often even know there are unique challenges#and believe me I know the challenges of invisible disability too!!#I have invisible disabilities!#but as someone who has also been at least visibly 'off' since they were 10 I am SO SICK of invisible disabilities being hailed as like#a unique extra oppression that us lucky visibly disabled people don't have to deal with#there are challenges to invisible disabilities that visibly disabled people DON'T have to deal with!#but you need to understand that *the reverse is also true*#there are MASSIVE benefits to being able to lie about your disability for example#or not dealing with the overt ableism that comes with your disability being obvious to everyone#*I do not have the option to pretend I'm not disabled.* that is never an option I have#I walk weirdly. I use a mobility aid now. my speech and face are 'off.' I lean to one side#for a long time I wore sunglasses 24/7 and often didn't make sense. I sometimes can't speak or won't react to others#for the most part people will always know that at the very least something is wrong with me#and more obviously I have people telling me they'll pray for me; telling me I can't do things I'm already in the process of doing;#wanting to shake my hand to tell me I'm an inspiration for not killing myself; giving me dirty looks for existing in public#and yes. I'm aware that this is very much an in-community issue. I know the average abled person doesn't know invisible disabilities exist#that's why there's so much awareness happening for it#but as a visibly disabled person I get SO TIRED of constantly hearing 'I wish my disability was visible :'('#it's just 'I wish I had your disability!' but from other disabled people
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#blocking everyone who says option 3#alternatively: a laptop from a decade or two ago that's still going strong. even if it's falling apart a little. arent we all
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balor 🥰
#fields of mistria#fom#balor#fanart#art#sir...im so in love w you...#if anyone else like me loved the fuck out of stardew but was disappointed in the romance options...please play this game#the characters/interactions/dialouge is top notch#i knew nothing about this game i found out about it 2 days before release#i thought i was gonna go for march#and immedately met this guy and just#his first line is like (im a traveling merchant) and i went (oh no)#i have such a THING for merchant characters#i can finally live out my dream of romancing volo pkmn#sort of#except not evil#i think#love that the romance options in this game are like... adults with jobs/dreams/aspirations#unlike stardew where everyone is supposedly an adult but is like a teenager??#but in this game everyone is a contributing member of society#love that <3333#the dialouge for real is amazing#anyway. it still in uhh...early access? so you cant do everything youll be able to do one day#but thats good for me bc i tend to blast through these games and do 90% of things within a week#fanart???? from my ass???#only because i love this game and him#im so fucked up for him#not me tracking his ass down everyday to talk to him#also what i love about this game is being able to talk to everyone multiple times a day#like every hour or something
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Them, your honor
Anyways thank you echoes for giving poor a-ttp link a rest
#tloz#princess zelda#link#echoes of wisdom#echoes of wisdom spoilers#eow#art#my art#redesign#loz redesigns round 2#listen i dont know where based link came from i just thought it was funny how shocked everyone looked at the end of the game#i did originally have the flynn poster thing as a funny page option but everybody else has already done it now lol#you know she went to lueburry and link 2 minutes after the game and got herself another sweet cloak#i like to think stamps do indeed take off and its 98% zeldas fault#but yes zelda gets to be the protag of this game due to having an actual loving father#sorry wild zelda lol#but yes outfits are vaguely st-r wars inspired#idk if that comes through or not
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i saw a video where a woman’s husband said hello to her best friend (they touched cheeks with a short mwah) and so many people felt that this would be a personal boundary violation for them, so i’m curious what the consensus is!!
keeping it simple, no nuance + if u think ur ethnicity or culture has to do w your answer i would love to know!! 🫂😚💕💕
#i do it often but mostly with family + family friends + some people from my family’s ‘religion’#and the ‘peck on the cheek’ is rarely ever a true kiss. we kinda bunch our lips to the side and make a kiss noise while our cheeks touch!!#also i was raised w puerto rican roots 🇵🇷 so i think that has to do w my norm#and!! i would never touch cheeks w someone i didnt think was being covid safe no matter who they are#and i absolutely never came close to doing it at the height of the pandemic#i never felt much pressure to do it u know??#i was never made to feel like i NEED to do it so i’ve always been comfy avoiding it when needed for the sake of my health#but in closing: i don’t mind it/never thought much of it until now!!#anyways.txt#poll#(also by ‘no nuance’ i meant in the poll options. i love reading everyone’s personal nuance <3)
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Your father is dying. Your incipient mother-in-law is dying. Your fiancé might be dying. Said fiancé and future mother-in-law are both willing to confide about their health conditions to you, but insist that it needs to be kept secret from the other, despite the fact that they're mother and daughter and have known each other for all of your fiancé's life, whereas they both met you probably only a couple of years ago. Every day, Arthur Holmwood wakes up.
#dracula#dracula daily#arthur holmwood#I don't know why everyone calls him the 'boring boyfriend option'#when what makes him interesting is clearly the extent to which he is holding on by his fingernails#'Jeeves! Fetch me my Screaming Pillow!'
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One of the things that strikes me about the whole Neil Gaiman thing is that people really want to portray Amanda Palmer as being a remorselessly complicit figure, when a lot of things that are very obviously fucked up and menacing when you put it next to the actual assaults going on - are perfectly normalised and accepted within poly/ENM world. All of these things are fucked up and menacing, but the bubble of pseudo-feminist poly world is incredibly effective at making you totally oblivious to the fact that you're opening the door to abuse and emotional damage.
The thing of 'oh we just slept together and I took a consensual nude of you, now can I have your consent to send it to my husband' is a feature of poly culture, not a bug. Suggestive and inappropriate comments to a woman about how hot your husband will find her are completely normalised. A statement from your husband like 'I don't get to play with my Dom side with you, so I need to be with other women who are natural subs' (which I suspect is the reason he gave when he kept having affairs when she was eight months pregnant, after agreeing to be monogamous) is something that culture will expect you to be completely Cool Girl about. Being blasé when a woman comes to you and says 'your husband made a pass at me' is also the expected Cool Girl reaction. Bringing women into your circle that you think your husband will find hot is completely par for the course in those mindsets and part of being a good and fun and sexy partner - no one doing that in poly culture thinks of themselves as 'feeding him women to rape' or grooming. Lots of people seem to find Amanda telling Neil that he couldn't hit on Scarlett, but still leaving him alone with her, to be jawdropping - but, as someone who has had people in ENM relationships exhibit poor boundaries around me and try to insinuate me into their sex lives in inappropriate ways, I know that that kind of thing is seen as due diligence and an appropriate way to navigate a situation. My experience of people immersed in that kind of culture is just this general assumption that words and agreements are magic - that all you need to do is communicate and agree terms and everything is fine, and if an agreement is violated you just need to communicate more and agree terms and everything is fine, pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.
What a lot of people want (and have wanted all along when they were making jokes about how understandable it was for Neil to 'fly across the world to escape having lockdown with her') is for Amanda Palmer to have been a truly abhorrent person, when the truth is that the whole culture around poly/ENM/open relationships - not necessarily the stated rules everyone claims to be abiding by, but the actual culture itself - encourages this stuff, especially from women.
I'm not suggesting Amanda is a victim in anywhere close to the same way as any of the women profiled in the reportage, and I do think her learned obliviousness enabled her complicity in creating a situation like Scarlett being left alone with Neil, but she has clearly been manipulated as well. Think of how insanely manipulative it was for him to wait until she was in late-stage pregnancy to start violating the terms of their marriage, how he surprised her with a lot of 'dark' elements of his personality after they were already married with a child, how we don't even necessarily know how much control she had over the marital pursestrings, how (as covered in the Tortoise podcasts) he would pressure the woman who lived on his estate into sexual activity by saying that Amanda, not him, wanted to sell the house and kick her out - and that if she kept him sweet he'd be her advocate against his evil wife. He is so clearly a profoundly manipulative person and it's just lunacy to suggest that none of that manipulation will have been targeted at Amanda.
#neil gaiman#also: that her being silent about this is almost certainly for legal reasons to do with custody battles#and I think everyone can agree that however problematic you find her as a person#however much this makes you scream and cry to admit#the best option is very very clearly for her to get sole custody of that child
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Bonus round! Do you use a queue tag?
#ive been super curious about this because people seem to have really strong opinions on the queue! so many people seem to HATE it#but i love using the queue! i dont really know exactly why i like it so much- i started using in like... 2016 and its a fundamental part of#my tumblr experience now. i think i started off just using it for offline hours so id hit most my american mutuals (/ for aes posts)#but these days basically everything goes in my queue (cept time sensitive things & like. current hype and original posts-#anything 'normal' posting is in the queue)#idk it feels. nice to me! i like to spread out my posting and not rb 30 things in half an hour and then disappear for the rest of the day#esp since my spaces are so circular- the same post runs on my dash a dozen times minimum. and i get to put it on ur dash a week late!!!#and its so nice to have small interactions with mutuals in incompatible timezones; to open up my notifications in the morning#and go: oh! my friends were here <3#its such a Part of the tumblr experience for me i dont think i could ever truly change now. maybe switch to timed queueing#but my availability changes so much i prefer to just. know i guess#but (i am so sorry for all that) im curious about how other people feel!!!!!! itd be so interesting to hear abt why people do/do not like i#i know some people like the experience of spamming and going. some people think it makes this seem to much like influencing or whatever#everyone has their reasons and i want to know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#nyxtalks#poll#queue#no see answers option because you must fall into one of these
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I added some colours to her :)
#digital art#character art#character design#marcia#discworld#discworld fanart#angua von uberwald#bro i need to get weirder i need my art to be weirder i need the shapes i need the colurs i need to not play safe i need to be a freak#2025 goal become an even bigger freak i can never stop#i really like how she turned out#i never used such muted colours before i kinda like how murky she looks#a true ankhmorporkian#still making my way through men at arms they just found the clown#i am fascinated with the river that is running through that city#it makes me think of Bristol uk <3#going back to angua i like to think the armour they gave her was already all beaten up#hello and welcome to the nightwatch. have the nastiest underfunded gear we could find this side of the city#also i like to think that the official colours of ankh morpork are greenred#two colours on the opposing sides of the colour wheel but they are forced together to coexist#ankh would be green morpork would be red#and now everyone and their patrician just gotta cope#worldbuilding through colour would be fun : )#ohhh the inside of the palace could look quite cool because it would have to utilize both to celebrate the union#but then you go into the city and across the river you can sorta see the divide#not that all the houses would be one colour or whatever thats a bit predictable#but through fashion statements or exported goods or family insignia#and then you could incorporate it further for example vimes the guy of the city would want to take on the whooole thang. thats his city#some criss cross apple sauce checkers quilted mismatched mumbo jumbo#and then in contrast to that you would have his wife-elected suit and tie getup that distances him from his duty and kills him#so many options i tell you
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