#TheAarons2024

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THE AARONS 2024 - Best Film Performance

The very first Aarons made a big deal about nominating Phyllis Smith for her role in Inside Out while other award shows tend to ignore voice actors entirely. Since then, no other voice actor has been nominated for this award. I’m starting to think that speech was performative. Here is The Aaron for Best Film Performance:

BEST FILM PERFORMANCE

WINNER: Glen Powell as Gary Johnson - Hit Man

If you hire Glen Powell, you can count on him killing it. Since Everybody Wants Some!!, the actor has shown he has charisma to spare. In Hit Man, he is gifted a role that disperses that charm across several different personalities. The unique quirks of each character Gary thinks up is the perfect showcase of Powell’s range; the depth of his performance emerges as the lines between these alternate identities begin to blur. Gary Johnson may find his life being subsumed by a monster of his own making, but audiences can see that Powell always has everything under control.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Mikey Madison as Ani - Anora

As Ani assets herself amongst her anarchic situation, it’s obvious that Madison is owed every accolade. 

Mike Faist as Art Donaldson - Challengers

Previous Aarons champion Mike Faist elevated every move made by Donaldson into an art form.

Nicholas Holt as Justin Kemp - Juror #2

Rending the hearts of viewers with his conflicted turn as Kemp, Holt’s role could not be dismissed for good cause.

Cynthia Erivo as Elphaba Thropp - Wicked

The Aarons have been holding space for Erivo ever since she brought down the house with her defiant performance.

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARON FOR BEST SUPPORTING FILM PERFORMANCE!

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THE AARONS 2024 - Best Supporting Film Performance

2016 marked the introduction of the Supporting categories and the one and only Aaron award given for the Worst Film Performance, whose nominees included CGI for its role as Grand Moff Tarkin in Rogue One. Clearly that dishonor didn’t cause its career to suffer, as CGI went on to star in last year’s Alien: Romulus as a ghoulish Ian Holm. Here is The Aaron for Best Supporting Film Performance:

WINNER: Nicolas Cage as Longlegs - Longlegs

Refraining from revealing its killer during the film’s marketing campaign was a wise idea; Cage seems barely restrained by the big screen when he first appears, cropped slightly out of frame. The actor has quite the reputation for unhinged characters, but his Longlegs is a freak unlike any other; the actor seems to be indulging in some clear creative freedom following a string of critically acclaimed works. To say too much about Nicolas Cage’s role would be detrimental to the film’s intended experience, but suffice it to say, the actor’s unpredictability will keep audiences always on their toes. 

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Ariana Grande-Butera as Galinda Upland - Wicked

Fully embodying the iconic role, the bubbly Grande-Butera is properly a popular pick.

Jesse Plemons as Militia Soldier - Civil War

Plemons took an unnamed cameo and transformed it into the most disturbing scene in War’s arsenal; that’s just the kind of actor he is.

Tilda Swinton as Elizabeth - Problemista

The chaotic and uncompromising Elizabeth makes herself everyone’s problem; Swinton was the solution to keeping her likeable.

Chris Hemsworth as Dementus - Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga

Weaponizing his magnetism for evil ends, Hemsworth maximized detestation for the demented villain. 

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARON FOR BEST SCREENPLAY!

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THE AARONS 2024 - Best Score

Fun fact: The Aarons all started from a desire to shout out Michael Giacchino’s transcendent score from Jupiter Ascending. The quality of nominated films could only go up from there. Here is The Aaron for Best Score:

WINNER: Challengers by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross

Truthfully, it wasn’t even a competition: Since its release in April, Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross’s score for Challengers stood not only as the clear frontrunner for best score of the year, but likely as one of the best of the decade. The synth-heavy score electrifies every swing of a racquet, scuff of a shoe, and grunt of exertion into a pulse-pounding soundscape, supercharging the high-paced rhythm of the tennis games. Backed with a chorus of ‘yeahs’, the Nine Inch Nails musicians rally listeners to be fully invested in every action taken during the film. That kind of blowout success scores love in return.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

The First Omen by Mark Korven

Korven’s discordant choral arrangements were a harrowing harbinger to the film’s most frightening revelations. 

Dune: Part Two by Hans Zimmer

Progressing the themes present in Part One, Zimmer’s resourceful use of bagpipes, synths, and yearning vocals coalesce into the earworms of Dune. 

IF by Michael Giacchino

As the score swells from a wistful piano to perky whistling, Giacchino affirms himself as one of Hollywood’s most imaginative composers.

Horizon: An American Saga - Chapter One by John Debney

Debney’s majestic orchestral score effectively established Horizon’s throwback tone.

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARON FOR BEST SONG!

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THE AARONS 2024

It's the Tenth Annual Aarons, celebrating the Best and Worst of Film and TV in 2024!

FIRST UP: THE 2024 AARONS FOR BEST FILM!

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THE AARONS 2024 - Best Film

This year, 83 films compete to join the prestigious ranks of the past decade of Aaron Award winners. That said, the very first winner of this award back in 2015 was Star Wars: The Force Awakens, and it’s finally time to admit that was a mistake. This is not a joke. Someone stole my envelope - La La Land had won Best Picture. Here are The Aarons for Best Film:

#10. The Wild Robot

Rather than go down the photorealistic rabbithole, Dreamworks went rogue with a new painterly animation aesthetic initiated by 2022’s The Bad Guys and optimized in last year’s Wild Robot. The striking storybook style, which renders an isolated island with vibrant colors and an unmistakable human touch, immediately engulfs audiences in Wild’s unpredictable world. Though the harshness of nature is on full display in the survival tale, Robot operates itself foremost by its heart, easily endearing the audience to its optimistic and insubordinate protagonist. While kids will be enamored by the adorable animals, adults may love the film even more for its profound pondering of parenthood; fittingly, The Wild Robot defies clear-cut parameters. 

#9. Longlegs

Longlegs is a towering achievement for director Oz Perkins, son of Psycho’s Anthony Perkins, who has been rightfully amassing a following in recent years for his measured terror. The thriller is every bit as diligent as its titular serial killer as it spins an unnerving tale of cold cases spanning decades, linked only by a series of mysterious letters. With one foot in hair-raising cat-and-mouse games akin to Silence of the Lambs and another in cosmic horror, Longlegs holds a unique formula for burrowing into one’s brain. An expertly utilized Nicholas Cage is the highlight of the film, but everyone involved, from co-star Maika Monroe to cinematographer Andrés Arochi Tinajero, can stand tall. 

#8. Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

The new Planet of the Apes was left in a precarious position after the departure of its main architects, star Andy Serkis and director Matt Reeves; seamlessly passing the baton to The Maze Runner’s Wes Ball, Kingdom has secured its renewed reign. Like its predecessors, Kingdom is the crown jewel of special effects driven blockbusters; the top-notch motion-capture technology preserves every nuance of the planet-sized personalities at play, most notably Kevin Durand as a damn dirty ape antagonist. The perilous adventure wrestles with legacy on a metatextual level as characters clash over their lost leader’s ideology, advancing the mature themes of 2014’s Dawn. Taken as a whole, the series now forms a proper epic; Apes together have never been stronger. 

#7. Heretic

One would be forgiven for having doubts: it’s all part of Heretic’s design. The thriller from A Quiet Place writers Scott Beck and Bryan Woods is so patiently devoted to toying with its prey that one wonders whether a satisfying answer to its mystery box is even possible. It’s a testament to the strength of its performances, namely Hugh Grant as the mischievous trap setter Mr. Reed, that the film would entertain even if all its pop-culture infused religious dissension had ultimately amounted to nothing. Luckily (or perhaps providentially), Heretic is one step ahead at every turn, bringing all its pieces together in a profound and perturbing peroration; viewers who kept the faith will find themselves richly rewarded.

#6. Anora

Anora’s connection to the classic Cinderella story is a bit slippery. The film may start with a young sex worker being swept off her feet by the son of a Russian oligarch into an enchanting life of glitz and glamor, but it quickly veers in an unexpected, electrifying direction. The road trip antics of its second act are more comparable to the Coen brothers and their incompetent criminals, or classic screwball comedies like Bringing Up Baby. Just as one settles in for a riotous time though, the film veers yet again in a stripped down ending that lays bare the emotional weight of the turbulent journey. Cumulatively, director Sean Baker cooks up a multifaceted masterpiece. 

#5. Challengers

A lot of worthy contenders vied for a spot in this list this year, but Challengers claimed one without breaking a sweat. Its advantage? The trio of all-star actors (Zendaya, Mike Faist, and Josh O’Connor) that comprise its love triangle, its director’s playful approach to the material, and a pulsating score by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross. Each element adds a larger than life allure to the sports drama, as the well-rounded characters become increasingly tangled together in tennis nets and bed sheets. Deeply immersed in the action by dynamic camera angles and privy to every volley of coquettish banter between the three, viewers are the clear winner here.

#4. Juror #2

The verdict is in: Clint Eastwood’s latest is one of his best. Channeling the same cynicism with which he deconstructed the myths of the Western genre in Unforgiven, Eastwood takes aim squarely at American classic 12 Angry Men. Here, the holdout juror’s motive is far more self-serving - a fear he may have in fact perpetrated the very crime he is called to adjudicate. As the moral quagmire compounds, the mirror held up to our own often overriding self-interest becomes impossible to ignore. The trial reaches a conclusion after many riveting twists and turns, but Eastwood refuses to ever let audiences off the hook; the pit formed in one’s stomach is not easily vacated.

#3. Hit Man

Richard Linklater’s films often aim to inspire deep introspection while sweeping viewers off their feet; his latest hits both targets from an unexpected angle. Loosely inspired by the true story of a college professor who assisted police by posing as an assassin-for-hire, Hit Man’s premise is primed with questions on the malleability of identity that have long preoccupied its director. He finds his perfect match in Glen Powell, who manifests these questions in a peak performance as the professor (and his various personas). Infused with an uneasy sexual chemistry by Adria Arjona’s femme fatale, the film has all the components of a guaranteed crowd pleaser; if you’re looking for a hit, man, look no further.

#2. The Substance

Style over substance? Coralie Fargeat’s body horror film about an experimental de-aging drug has an excess of both. The Substance knows how to flaunt it too, with flashy cinematography highlighting the gnarly practical effects. On its mind are the commercialization of bodies, dangers of addiction, and fleeting nature of fame. Demi Moore and Margaret Qualley form two halves of the same character fighting to take charge of their life; both effortlessly control the screen during their allotted time. If that’s not enough, the film unleashes an excessively blood-soaked finale to ensure the satire sinks in; The Substance could not bring out a better version.

AND THE BEST FILM OF 2024 IS...

#1. Hundreds of Beavers

One of the best aspects of modern times is the democratization of filmmaking: a great work of art can come from anywhere and stand alongside the classics. The best film of last year came from a crew of six, a budget of $150,000, and a handful of modified mascot costumes. Flawlessly translating the harebrained scheming of Looney Tunes cartoons to live action, Hundreds of Beavers has no shortage of gags packed into its breezy runtime. As a trapper goes to increasingly absurd lengths to win the heart of a merchant’s daughter, the technical ambitions of the black-and-white indie filmmaking grow in turn. Even before the ludicrous secret hidden within the beavers’ lair is finally revealed, viewers will be asking, “Damn, how did they do that?”

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARONS FOR WORST FILM!

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THE AARONS 2024 - Worst Film

The first Aaron Award for Worst Film only had 5 nominees, one of which was The Gallows, which I now like quite a bit and frequently re-watch. I guess I was still getting the hang of things. Here are The Aarons for Worst Film:

#10. Uglies

If Uglies thought it could arrive fashionably late to the Young-Adult dystopian craze, it was sorely mistaken. True to its name, the Netflix adaptation of the 2005 novel is an awfully garish affair: perhaps the overdone effort to doll up its characters could be written off as intentional given the subject matter, but that wouldn’t explain away the equally repulsive CGI of its nauseating hoverboard sequences. The juvenile worldbuilding, which questionably casts Laverne Cox as a villain forcing teens into surgery, doesn’t diverge enough from the host of similar series out there; if you’ve ever seen The Hunger Games, The Giver, or The Maze Runner, you’ve pretty much seen Uglies too.

#9. The Front Room

Upon its release, The Front Room immediately found a home at the bottom of my yearly ranking and thenceforth proved impossible to remove. The tonally unstable horror-comedy film, centered on a pregnant woman forced to live with her cantankerous religious mother-in-law, futilely evokes the spirits of Hereditary, Get Out, and Rosemary’s Baby but settles for making its audience into the butt of a crappy joke (in more than one sense of the word). It’s unclear what drove brothers Max and Sam Eggers to the short-story source material, which is stretched too thin at feature-length; the two couldn’t be further removed from their own family, Nosferatu director Robert Eggers.

#8. Red One

On the first day of Christmas (well, on a mistimed mid-November weekend), Jake Kasdan gave to me a flat-out catastrophe. Exchanging magic for a militarized mythology, Red One changes the hierarchy of the holiday by trimming Santa Claus of every ounce of joy he once possessed. One would need to create a new level of naughty lister to account for all the cinematic sins present, from the murky special effects to the lazy one-liners. The film’s ill-suited sentimentality constantly butts heads with its stone-faced frontman; you can add Red One to the list of black marks against Dwayne Johnson.

#7. The Deliverance

While he may have understandably shied away from plastering his name all over his films, Lee Daniels’ presence still haunts The Deliverance. The Precious director’s handling of the real life Ammons haunting case is careless at best, offensive at worst. The film starts with potential - an alcoholic mother’s fight to keep custody of her children is exacerbated by a supernatural evil - but neglects all the complexities of generational trauma put forward in service of a blatant deus ex machina ending. One could be forgiven for thinking Glenn Close’s amusingly audacious grandmother wandered in from an entirely different movie; the pedestrian exorcisms meanwhile deliver nothing unexpected from the genre. 

#6. Saving Bikini Bottom: The Sandy Cheeks Movie

If nautical nonsense be something you wish, well, then be careful what you wish for. The Sandy Cheeks Movie, one of several SpongeBob spinoffs set for Netflix, was seemingly invented specifically to drive viewers nuts. The inane plot, which involves a scientific conspiracy to sell Bikini Bottom’s residents as pets, moves at a whirlwind speed with which the janky animation can’t keep up. These lackluster visuals are diluted further by extensive use of live-action scenes, a seemingly budget-minded decision that only serves to steal more focus away from its titular character. Even if the subsequent spin-offs can reverse course, Saving Bikini Bottom has sunk SpongeBob to a new low.

#5. Imaginary

Imaginary wasn’t the only 2024 film to wonder about what happens to imaginary friends after children grow up. It was, however, the only one to leave audiences in a complete state of disbelief. Padded with confounding choices (like thinking its viewers won’t make the connection between the initials ‘C.B.’ and the villain ‘Chauncey Bear’) and haphazardly stitched together by director Jeff Ludlow (every minor reveal is given the erratic flashback interpolation of a Saw trap), Blumhouse’s teddy-bear terror is so bad, it’s unreal. One can’t even begin to explain what’s happening with the neighbor played by infamous horror icon Betty Buckley - that she manages to keep getting work is the most unbelievable aspect of all.

#4. Afraid

Artificial intelligence can’t compare to the best of human creativity, but it would be hard pressed to make a film worse than Afraid. The pitiful attempt by Blumhouse to replicate their high-tech horror hit M3GAN lacks the satirical spirit that brought the latter to life. Failing to produce even the most routine of jump scares, Afraid can’t configure its numerous ideas into anything remotely unsettling. It’s hard to be frightened of an AI that’s susceptible to swatting and considers watching The Emoji Movie to be a reward, though the program does manage to be a noticeable drain on once energetic actors John Cho and Katherine Waterson. 

#3. The Strangers: Chapter 1

The Strangers: Chapter 1 is a victim to familiarity. The first film in a pre-shot trilogy doesn’t stray too far from the 2008 original when it strands a young couple in an isolated cabin to be tormented by three masked intruders. Tedium is the real torture, aggravated by every quote and image weakly recycled from the initial installment. As characters mindlessly wander the woods, it quickly becomes clear that Chapter 1 is just going through the motions to get to more distinctive material in the future. After its terrible first impression, The Strangers is unlikely to find many viewers interested in being reacquainted. 

#2. Madame Web

It would hardly take superpowers to have foreseen Madame Web gracing this list; perhaps the greater surprise is that it’s the sole Spider-Man spin-off to have a spot this year. Even among the dire straits of Sony’s dysfunctional universe, the movie stands alone. Inhuman interactions, forced foreshadowing, Pepsi product-placement - Madame Web connects them all loosely to a rushed re-recording of its villain’s entire plot thread. With such a shameless attempt to rewrite itself on the fly, it’s even more embarrassing to hear the dialogue they stuck with: turns of phrase like “When you take on the responsibility, great power will come” should have been left behind in the Amazon with her mom when she was researching spiders right before she died.

AND THE WORST FILM OF 2024 IS...

#1. Megalopolis

Megalopolis was built as a monument for the future, and, even after a thousand years, one may never see a work of art with a more unexpected erection. One could call into question the sanity of its architect Francis Ford Coppola, but the man may have well and truly found the secret to renewable energy with the way he reinvents the cadence of his characters, tone of his tragedy, and integrity of his imagery in each new frame of the film. With every passing second, the self-financed money-sink collapses further under the weight of its inarticulate plot and secures its legacy as the most confounding cinematic oddity since The Room. The movie may have lost $100 million at the box office, but it’s an invaluable investment for anyone with an allegiance to bad taste. 

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARON FOR BEST DIRECTOR!

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THE AARONS 2024 - Best Director

Alert: The 2015 Aaron for Best Director awarded a nomination to one ‘Stephen Spielberg.’ If anyone knows him, please direct him to forward his statue on to its intended recipient, Steven Spielberg. Here is The Aaron for Best Director:

WINNER: Coralie Fargeat - The Substance

With The Substance, Coralie Fargeat has reshaped herself into a singular director. Her second film fulfilled the promise of Revenge, her debut feature, by eviscerating the unsavory male gaze often dominating the genre. Fargeat’s exaggerated close-ups fawning over idyllically and monstrously transformed bodies alike inundate the audiences with satirical jabs at unrealistic beauty standards. Her eye for aesthetics is exemplified in her commitment to practical effects, with the tangibility of everything on screen fortifying the parable’s themes. Few directors could strike the right tone between indulgence and excoriation; Fargeat achieves the perfect balance.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Mike Cheslik - Hundreds of Beavers

Cheslik easily lodged a mention for laying out hundreds of ways to ensnare viewers. 

Luca Guadagnino - Challengers

Guadagnino clearly had a ball finding dazzling perspectives for the deeply personal tennis tournaments.

Arkasha Stevenson - The First Omen

When the prequel was announced, no one could have foreseen it becoming an unforgettable calling card for the first-time film director.

George Miller - Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga

Even at 79 years old, Miller’s mastery of high-octane action shows no signs of slowing down.

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARON FOR BEST FILM PERFORMANCE!

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THE AARONS 2024 - Best Screenplay

Unlike some other categories, I still stand by every film ever nominated for this award. I guess I just did a better job screening them. Here is The Aaron for Best Screenplay:

WINNER: Juror #2 by Jonathan A. Abrams

Though Juror #2 is only his debut screenplay, Jonathan A. Abrams already exhibits a talent far beyond his peers. The legal thriller’s elevator pitch alone is intriguing but could have suffered from a campy execution. It becomes evident while watching however that Abrams deliberated every potential pitfall for the premise, and selected the strongest possible candidate for his lead role: an everyman driven by civic duty and love for his family in genuine turmoil over the moral dilemma he’s trapped in. The supporting cast is likewise filled out by sympathetic figures. When things do come to a head, the insightfulness of Abrams’ writing makes it hard to judge any one too harshly.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Challengers by Justin Kuritzkes

Hotshot screenwriter Justin Kuritzkes nets a nomination for serving up snappy dialogue and a savvy structure.

Hit Man by Richard Linklater and Glen Powell

Seducing viewers into its romance and its strange self-actualizing philosophy alike, the script for Hit Man blew me away.

Heretic by Scott Beck & Bryan Woods

It undoubtedly went through a few iterations to get there, but Beck and Woods’ screenplay is as inerrant as humanly possible.

Orion and the Dark by Charlie Kaufman

If viewers had previously been in the dark, turning the kids movie’s third act into Baby’s First Adaptation shined a light on Kaufman’s influence.

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARON FOR BEST SCORE!

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THE AARONS 2024 - Best Original Song

I probably shouldn’t say this, and definitely shouldn’t think this, but the reason this category returned for the 3rd Annual Aarons was so I could always refer to The Bye-Bye Man as an award-winning film. I guess that was the year The Aarons said farewell to integrity, but at least it took them two years longer than any other award show. Here is The Aaron for Best Song:

WINNER: “24 Karat Case of Love” by Bear McCreary and Brendan McCreary - The 4:30 Movie

Kevin Smith’s tribute to teen comedies wouldn’t be complete without a fist pumping soundtrack - the characters even say as much in one of the film’s many meta moments. Thankfully, prolific composer Bear McCreary was ready to oblige. Taking obvious cues from 80s synth-pop themes like The Breakfast Club’s “Don’t You Forget About Me,” the track amplifies the authenticity of the film’s period setting; at first listen, one would be forgiven for thinking it truly was a forgotten hit from the era. Capping off the coming-of-age journey with the nostalgic and romantic melody ensured audiences would want to revisit The 4:30 Movie time and time again.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

“Double Life” by Pharrell Williams - Despicable Me 4

Pharrell’s lively theme song also doubled as (supposedly) the second-best Drake diss-track of the year.

“Save Me” by Saleka - Trap

In a bit of added realism, the catchy beats of Saleka’s song could surely lure in all kinds of fans. 

“HERE WE GO!” by Lil Nas X - Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F

Lil Nas X kicked the sequel into high gear with an adept interpolation of the iconic Axel F motif.

“Compress/Repress” by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross - Challengers

Written with the film’s director, the track from the Nine Inch Nails duo matches the varied energy of their larger soundtrack.

NEXT UP: THE 2024 DAVID FOR BEST FICTIONAL LANGUAGE!

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THE AARONS 2024: THE DAVID - Best Fictional Language

The David Award was established in 2016 as a special award designed by and named after my good friend, intended to honor aspects of film that mainstream awards are too afraid to acknowledge.

When David approached me all those years ago with his idea and his first category, ‘Best Animal Performance,' he was speaking my language. This year, David has tasked me with awarding languages created solely for the big screen. Here is The David for Best Fictional Language:

WINNER: Longlegs’ Letters - Longlegs

Though it is hopefully not one that anyone else will adopt, the creepy correspondences left behind by Longlegs at his crime scenes mark the most memorable fictional language of the year. Intensifying the film’s macabre myth-making, the coded messages immediately align the movie murderer with infamous real-world killers (the film’s marketing team went as far as publishing one such cipher in The Seattle Times). Constituting a major part of Longlegs’ mystique and a crucial clue in bringing him down, the altered alphabet is an unforgettable element of the film; its innovative inclusion makes crafting an eerie atmosphere look as easy as A-B-C.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Chakobsa Chatter - Dune: Part Two

A carefully constructed language from linguists David and Jessie Peterson enabled the Fremen to make their voices heard throughout the Dune universe.

Beaver Babble - Hundreds of Beavers

Though the film is mostly silent, some well-timed gibberish logs one of Beavers’ biggest laughs.

Ozian Oration - Wicked

Cynthia Erivo conjured up an amalgamation of real-world languages to give more weight to Elphaba’s levitation spells.

Minion Mouthing - Despicable Me 4

The Minions would never lead the pack, but their nonsense language is usually good for a laugh or two.

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARONS FOR BEST TV SHOW!

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THE AARONS 2024 - Best TV Show

The 2015 Aarons for Best TV Show had many winners that were never renominated in subsequent years - some, like Hannibal, because they ended far too soon, and some because their quality was gone in a Flash. Here are The Aarons for Best TV Show:

#10. Superman & Lois (Season 4) - CW

It clearly takes more than budget cuts to drag the Man of Steel down; in fact, Superman & Lois seemed revitalized in the wake of a battle with Doomsday. The sole remaining CW superhero series pulled no punches in its final season, which saw its heroic family go toe-to-toe with a vengeful Lex Luthor, shaking up the status quo with unexpected deaths and the reveal of significant secrets. The show’s heart was as strong as ever, grounded by the chemistry between stars Tyler Hoechlin and Elizabeth Tulloch. The next person gunning for a romantic, inspirational adaptation of the character will have a high bar to clear.

#9. Batman: Caped Crusader (Season 1) - Amazon Prime

For decades, every piece of Batman media has lived in the shadows of Batman: The Animated Series; the cartoon’s noir influences and pitch-perfect voice cast are for many the definitive interpretation of the character. Caped Crusader is the closest anyone’s come to matching that greatness. The influence of Bruce Timm, a producer on both shows, is unmistakable in the show’s dark psychological tone. A 1930’s setting, reinvented villains, and more serialized storytelling create riveting differences from his original work. Hamish Linklater commendably fills the shoes of the late Kevin Conroy while making the role his own; that’s one of many ways Batman is more than just an echo of its past.

#8. Ted (Season 1) - Peacock

I can barely believe it myself, but Seth MacFarlane’s prequel to his film series of the same name is delightful. With no expense spared in bringing its star to life, every episode of the nostalgic 90s-set sitcom is stuffed with hilarious hijinks and surprising soul. The talking teddy bear certainly wasn’t softened at all by the switch to the small screen, but he is now propped up by a lovably dysfunctional family adding pathos to every irreverent antic. Finding the right mix between juvenile humor and meaningful character growth made Ted into a source of comfort last year.

#7. Interior Chinatown (Season 1) - Hulu

Interior Chinatown turned television inside out last year. The streaming series could perhaps be seen as the spiritual successor to previous Aarons-winner Kevin Can F**k Himself, poking fun at police procedurals in the same way the latter skewered sitcoms. The meta humor is amusing on its own, but Interior Chinatown uses it in service of a larger mission: calling attention to the types of characters that are often relegated to the margins by the media we consume. In contrast, with Jimmy O. Yang, Chloe Bennet, Ronny Chieng, and Diana Lin sharing its spotlight, Interior packs itself with as much talent as it can contain.  

#6. Smiling Friends (Season 2) - Adult Swim

Like all the bizarre shows with which Adult Swim floods the airways, Smiling Friends will really only be welcomed by viewers on the same wavelength. Those who appreciate its surreal narratives and mis-matched animation styles however will find the characters readily fulfilling their stated goal of spreading happiness. Despite the short episode lengths, the frenetic pacing of its absurdist jokes means viewers have plenty to sink their teeth into. Whether the Friends were helping a 64-bit video game icon find his second act or a stop-motion snowman overcome an existential crisis, every episode ended with its considered audience grinning from ear to ear. 

#5. The Penguin (Miniseries) - HBO

From Kraven the Hunter to Joker: Folie à Deux, many supervillain spin-offs failed to take flight in 2024; they would have been wise to take a lesson from The Penguin. The spinoff of The Batman continued the grim and gritty mood of its predecessor, earning rightful comparisons to fellow HBO hit The Sopranos with its character-driven mob story. The feather in its cap was letting its villain be a villain; the series effectively waddled a line between generating sympathy for The Penguin and disgust at his decisions. The miniseries works as a standalone tale, but will make it all the more gratifying if those actions come home to roost in future Batman sequels.

#4. Shōgun (Season 1) - FX

Shōgun has been conquering the award circuit since its release for good reason. The scale of the historical epic, which follows rival factions vying for power in an accurately recreated 17th century Japan, is one not commonly seen on the small screen outside of Game of Thrones. The extravagant sets and costumes are a beauty to behold, but Shōgun’s secret weapon is matching the scope of its production with the magnitude of its intimate moments. One couldn’t ask for finer actors than Hiroyuki Sanada, Cosmo Jarvis, and Anna Sawai for a war waged as much in words as on the battlefield.

#3. My Adventures with Superman (Season 2) - Adult Swim

It’s not a bird, not a plane, but another Superman show soaring into the top ten. My Adventures with Superman improved by leaps and bounds from an already astonishing first season through strengthening its supporting cast and uniting them against an imposing enemy. The anime-inspired series, which has always worn its heart on its sleeve, propelled its stunning action sequences with those pure emotions; each punch was empowered by the camaraderie of its cast. Superman and Lois’s continuing relationship was as cute as always, but the second season spread the love further with an adorable courtship between Supergirl and Jimmy Olsen; you will believe that sparks can fly.

#2. The Sympathizer (Miniseries) - HBO

It may sound counterintuitive, but The Sympathizer made for agreeable television by challenging its audience’s compassion. Acclaimed Oldboy director Park Chan-wook sets the tone in the first few episodes: the saga of a North Vietnamese spy living in America, adapted from Viet Thanh Nguyen’s Pulitzer-Prize winning novel, may be tongue-in-cheek, but it doesn’t hide from heavier themes of trauma, war, and identity. Hoa Xuande as The Captain is a compelling lead; his charm and commitment to his cause keeps audiences second-guessing. Robert Downey Jr. also stars in multiple roles; that may be the hook that gets viewers watching, but it’s the observations on courage and cultural assimilation that will earn their loyalty. 

AND THE BEST TV SHOW OF 2024 IS...

#1. Evil (Season 4) - Paramount+

It brings me no pleasure to report that Evil’s reign is over, but all good things must come to an end. With enough warning and an extended episode count, creators Robert and Michelle King were able to bring their series to a divine denouement. The final season reaped the benefits of seeds sowed throughout its run, paying off plotlines like the birth of the Antichrist and the simmering romantic tension between Dr. Kristen Bouchard and Father David Acosta. The show no doubt deserved to go on for many more seasons, but by keeping its focus on its character arcs, Evil allowed viewers to depart in peace.

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARONS FOR BEST TV EPISODE!

[myhahnestopinion]

THE AARONS 2024 - Best TV Episode

This category started with the 2nd Annual Aaron Awards, because for some reason I decided to give myself a lot more work to do when writing these. I must have been having an episode. Here are The Aarons for Best TV Episode:

#10. “Fissure Quest” (Star Trek: Lower Decks, Season 5, Episode 9)

Seeking out new life and new civilizations is a noble cause, but it’s just as valuable to hang out with old friends. That’s a philosophy that Lower Decks personified for much of its run, drawing from all eras of Star Trek canon as sources of humor. Its penultimate episode was the boldest and best example of the show’s fan service, following a multiversal starship crew composed of underserved characters from the franchise's history, voiced by their original actors. The time spent reunited with Enterprise’s T’Pol, Bashir and Garak from Deep Space Nine, and most notably the never-promoted Harry Kim of Voyager was all too brief, but a lovely way to send the series off into its final frontier.

#9. “No Lessons Learned” (Curb Your Enthusiasm, Season 12, Episode 10)

The title has long tried to downplay expectations, but viewers knew there was only one way that Curb Your Enthusiasm could end. As soon as the season started building to a trial, it was obvious that Larry David, someone who rarely gives up the last word, would be revisiting the controversial premise of his last highly anticipated finale, Seinfeld’s. The set up was similar - bringing out a string of memorable guest stars as witnesses to celebrate the series’ long run - but the punchline far funnier. True to its name, no lessons were learned, but, despite all the warnings, this time David did not disappoint. 

#8. “The Railroad” (What We Do In The Shadows, Season 6, Episode 4)

After six seasons of Shadows, one might fear the vampire’s antics would be long in the tooth, but the series kept going full steam ahead to the very end. What sets ‘The Railroad’ apart is how their latest stunt starts with the best of intentions, only for things to get way off track all the same: In an effort to help their unemployed human friend Sean, the vampires arrange for a job interview at the fake railroad company that only exists as a cover for their nocturnal lifestyles. The junction of the episode’s A- and B- plots may be the peak of the comedic cacophonies that had always been done so well in Shadows. 

#7. “The Red Dragon and the Gold” (House of the Dragon, Season 2, Episode 4)

It’s still confusing that HBO would clip the wings of its biggest hit with a neutered finale, but at least one episode in the show’s second season fulfilled the promise of a war between dragons. Better yet, the midpoint episode, directed by Alan Taylor, set a gold standard for the sweeping fantasy action provided by the series. The clash between the creatures of varying sizes and temperaments was an awesome sight, enriched by the grand character work established for the riders involved. Eve Best ruled the screen until the episode's jaw-dropping climax. That kind of daring storytelling was sorely missed as the season dragged on. 

#6. “Remember It” (X-Men ‘97, Season 1, Episode 5)

‘Remember It’ played its cards close to its chest, starting out with a muted storyline fleshing out romances among its cast and establishing the peaceful island nation of Genosha. The slight storytelling successfully lulls viewers into a false sense of security, before it drops an earth-shattering bomb on them. The subsequent action sequence showcased all the technological advances in animation since the original show’s run and capitalized on viewer’s long-standing affection for its returning characters. The ending would have been gut-wrenching on its own, but the bait-and-switch beforehand made the episode truly unforgettable.

#5. “Reach” (Halo, Season 2, Episode 4)

It might be a stretch to call Halo worth watching, but that doesn’t change the fact that ‘Reach’ was one of the most exhilarating episodes of the year. It only took the end of all humanity to rouse the listless video game adaptation into action. As soon as the alien invasion begins, ‘Reach’ refuses to let up, rotating between nerve-racking battles, rousing speeches, and honorable sacrifices. With clarity of purpose, sizable emotional stakes, and some stellar special effects, the war episode’s combat evolved dramatically from any other entry of the series. Halo should have shot for the stars more often.

#4. “Desperately Seeking Susan” (Ted, Season 1, Episode 5)

Susan is the thread that holds Ted together; the show quite simply wouldn’t work without the muzzy and magnanimous matriarch played by Legally Blonde’s Alanna Ubach. That’s why it was so heartening to see the family go out of their way to support her right back in the character’s spotlight episode. Of course, love has many languages: for her son John, it meant letting Susan fulfill her dream of being a teacher. For Ted, it meant launching into an uproarious unrestrained takedown of the class bully in Susan’s defense. Between the savagery of its humor and the tenderness of its ending, the episode was almost too much to bear. 

#3. “…And Be a Villain” (Batman: Caped Crusader, Season 1, Episode 2)

For Caped Crusader to live up to the legacy of The Animated Series, it would have to offer fans a tragic character study that redefined how they viewed a villain; the series managed to do so right off the bat. The second episode, written by celebrated comic writer Greg Rucka, was the best realization of the season’s focus on low-tech detective stories. The mystery on a movie set offered viewers plenty of plot twists and a deeply unsettling interpretation of classic comic-book foe Clayface, inspired by old B-movie horror films. The episode is the perfect primer for the villain’s upcoming DC Studios production; hopefully that film will be cast in the same mold.

#2. “Give Us Some Good Lines” (The Sympathizer, Season 1, Episode 4)

The Sympathizer could clearly relate to Interior Chinatown’s frustrations in representation. The miniseries’ detour to Napa County for the production of a Vietnam War epic was the source of its most scathing satire. The episode’s title is a reference to the show’s best gag: Spy-in-disguise The Captain, hired to bring authenticity to the filming, takes advantage of the filmmakers’ ignorance to sneak propaganda into the Vietnamese cast’s dialogue, knowing no one but its intended recipients will ever notice. Method actors, token casting, and egomaniacal directors also wind up in the episode’s comedic crosshairs, but its ultimate goal is using the setting to probe its protagonist’s past. It’s a major turning point for the series - the moment where The Sympathizer starts to generate pity.

AND THE BEST TV EPISODE OF 2024 IS...

#1. “Brother’s Egg” (Smiling Friends, Season 2, Episode 5)

‘Brother’s Egg’ is an overly easy way to crack someone up. As if laid by the great goose herself, every second of its twelve minutes is pure gold, opening with the absolutely darkest jest the show has done and continuing through to an eminently quotable family squabble. Never one to put all its eggs in one basket, the episode is the preeminent instance of the show’s scrambled storytelling and blended animation methods, flawlessly (and then deliberately poorly) integrating YouTuber Joel Haver’s rotoscope animation alongside its regular style. ‘Egg’s comedic beats are even more hysterical on rewatch - I must have seen the episode ten times already, no ‘yolk’. 

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARON FOR BEST TV PERFORMANCE!

[myhahnestopinion]

THE AARONS 2024 - Best TV Performance

The first Aaron for Best TV Performance nominated the entire cast of Hannibal for the award. Talk about co-stars cannibalizing each other’s votes. Here is The Aaron for Best TV Performance:

WINNER: Colin Farrell as The Penguin - The Penguin

When Farrell won the Aaron Award for Best Supporting Film Performance for the same role, it was noted that it seemed like just the tip of the iceberg for the character; an HBO miniseries all his own gave him ample opportunity to spread his wings. Freed from a PG-13 rating, the actor could wallow in all the unsavory facets of the ‘fowl’-mouthed mobster as The Penguin tried to charm and connive his way to power. Farrell is smooth enough to even fool the audience until the character’s depravity is impossible to hide. After plumbing the depths of the character, his intense eyes piercing through the prosthetics alone are enough to give one chills. 

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Hoa Xuande as The Captain - The Sympathizer

Though The Captain’s mission often went awry, Xuande remained always in command of viewer’s affinity.

Katja Herbers as Dr Kristen Bouchard - Evil

There’s no one better equipped to oppose evil than someone as good as Herbers.

Jodie Foster as Chief Liz Danvers - True Detective: Night Country

Even as Night grew increasingly murky, the formidable Foster was always a bright spot. 

Jimmy O. Yang as Willis Wu - Interior Chinatown

Looking inward, Yang made himself impossible to ignore in the role of a lifetime.

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARON FOR BEST SUPPORTING TV PERFORMANCE!

[myhahnestopinion]

THE AARONS 2024 - Best Supporting TV Performance

Since 2016, winners in this category have ranged from series regulars, to anthology-episode stars, to Robert Englund reprising his role of Freddy Krueger in two scenes of The Goldbergs, because sticking to consistent criteria is a nightmare. Here is The Aaron for Best Supporting TV Performance:

WINNER: Cristin Milioti as Sofia Falcone - The Penguin

Just like their characters, Colin Farrell and Cristin Milioti are birds of a feather, claiming both major acting awards this year for the Batman spin-off. Likewise, there was a lot lingering under the surface in Milioti’s performance, waiting for the right time to strike. Throughout the show, Sofia exists in conflict with people’s perceptions of her; under any other actor, the character might have come off as merely mad instead of mournful. That would have been the wrong call; it’s watching Miloti’s anger, anguish, and ambition and not considering it one of the best performances of the year that would be truly batty.  

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Alanna Ubach as Susan Bennett - Ted

Ubach’s Susan has the right stuff to rank among the greatest sitcom characters of all time.

Anna Sawai as Toda Mariko - Shōgun

Defined by her dignity, discernment, and sense of duty, Sawai’s Mariko slowly took charge of Shōgun.

Deidre O’Connell as Francis Cobb - The Penguin

If Milioti hadn’t won, The Penguin had others waiting in the wings, such as O’Connell’s poignant portrayal of the villain’s mother.

Robert Downey Jr. as Claude/Professor Hammer/Ned Godwin/Niko Damianos - The Sympathizer

Though his multiple roles shared a lack of empathy, each was elucidated by engaging idiosyncrasies.

NEXT UP: THE 2024 AARON FOR WORST TV SHOW!

[myhahnestopinion]

THE AARONS 2024 - Worst TV Show

I created this award for the original Aarons because I knew it would be a scream. Sorry, I mistyped that - I meant to say I created this award because I knew that it would be given to Scream: The TV Series, which earned my ire every year it was released. Here is The Aaron for Worst TV Show:

WINNER: Velma (Season 2) - Max

Apparently the critical thrashing given to the first season wasn’t enough for the creators to get a clue. Velma claims a successive victory in this category for all the same reasons as before: disagreeable depictions of its iconic characters, cringeworthy pop culture references, and a dearth of evidence that anyone involved understands the appeal of the original show. The second season made some scrappy attempts to align itself with the larger franchise, but only managed to call into question the continued conspicuous absence of Scooby himself. Velma’s confidence to end on a cliffhanger is even more puzzling; Warner Bros. decision to cancel the series was surely an open-and-shut case.

DISHONORABLE MENTIONS:

Universal Basic Guys (Pilot Only) - FOX

It takes basically one look at Guys to know that nothing funny is incoming.

American Horror Story (Season 12b) - FX

There’s no delicate way to put it: the belated, baffling ending to Season 12 was completely horrible.

American Horror Stories (Season 3b) - Hulu

Season 3 resumed with the remaining episodes left over from last year’s writer’s strike. They should have held them back longer.

Avatar: The Last Airbender (Season 1) - Netflix

The Avatar cycle repeats: the latest attempt to adapt the show to live action was just as rushed as the first.

THANK YOU FOR READING, AND FOR CELEBRATING 10 YEARS OF THE AARONS!

SCROLL ON FOR A LIST OF FILMS ELIGIBLE FOR THE 2024 AARONS!

[myhahnestopinion]

THE AARONS 2024 - Eligible Films

Fewer of these films feature Spider-Man than you would expect. Here are all the films eligible for The 2024 Aarons:

The 4:30 Movie

Abigail

Afraid

Alien: Romulus

Anora

Apartment 7A

Argylle

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F

Blink Twice

The Book of Clarence

Borderlands

Carry-On

Challengers

Civil War

Code 8: Part II

The Crow

Cuckoo

Deadpool & Wolverine

Dear Santa

The Deliverance

Despicable Me 4

Drive-Away Dolls

Dune: Part Two

The Fall Guy

The First Omen

Frogman

The Front Room

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga

The Garfield Movie

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire

Harold and the Purple Crayon

Hellboy: The Crooked Man

Heretic

Hit Man

Horizon: An American Saga - Chapter One

Hundreds of Beavers

IF

Imaginary

Immaculate

In a Violent Nature

Inside Out 2

Joker: Folie à Deux

Juror #2

The Killer’s Game

Kinds of Kindness

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

Kraven the Hunter

Kung Fu Panda 4

Late Night with the Devil

Lisa Frankenstein

Longlegs

Madame Web

Maxxxine

Mean Girls

Megalopolis

Never Let Go

Nosferatu

Orion and the Dark

Problemista

A Quiet Place: Day One

Rebel Moon: Part Two - The Scargiver

Red One

Salem’s Lot

Saturday Night

Saving Bikini Bottom: The Sandy Cheeks Movie

Smile 2

Sonic the Hedgehog 3

Speak No Evil

Stopmotion

The Strangers: Chapter 1

The Substance

Tarot

Time Cut

Transformers One

Trap

Twisters

Uglies

Venom: The Last Dance

V/H/S/Beyond

The Watchers

Wicked

The Wild Robot

SCROLL ON FOR A LIST OF TV SHOWS ELIGIBLE FOR THE 2024 AARONS!