#The writing is on the fucking wall people

[navybrat817]

All Dressed Up

Pairing: Biker!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Summary: Bucky visits a gallery to support his best friend and unexpectedly meets the girl of his dreams.

Word Count: Over 2.3k

Warnings: First meeting, mild dirty thoughts, instacrush, swearing, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?).

A/N: Okay, lovelies. A new AU. I'm sorry. @targaryenvampireslayer @tavners @starlightcrystalline @whisperlullaby @sgt-seabass @vesearlee , I feel like you all either heard me screech, encouraged, or helped me, and I appreciate you. ❤️ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Edit by the beautiful @nixakimbo and divider by the incredible @firefly-graphics . Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

Bucky didn’t dress up for most people since it wasn’t his style. He would do so for any of his brothers though, especially Steve. His best friend since childhood, and his club’s president, he always had a love and talent for drawing and painting. And after working his ass off on his exhibit it would’ve been a crime for the vice president not to show up.

Steve promised if there was ever a day when Bucky’s writing became published he’d be by his side to celebrate too. As much as they liked to give each other shit sometimes about art and how they created it, the support was there through and through. The only catch for tonight was that he had to dress nicely to get into the gallery. So, instead of the usual leather jacket or vest he wore and jeans, he went with a plain black suit and white button up shirt.

He refused to wear a tie since it wasn’t a wedding. He had to draw a line somewhere. No one paid him any mind though as they walked around the gallery, and he was more than fine with that. This wasn’t his night.

“You should be proud, punk,” Bucky said, looking over the art lining the large wall, each piece crafted with care.

“I am proud, jerk,” Steve smiled. He hadn’t worn a tie either, and it made Bucky feel a little better. “And you know you don’t have to stay the whole time.”

Bucky knew that. He also knew members and prospects would be trickling in and out throughout the evening. “Not needed at the bar tonight, so I can stay as long as I want. But I might cut out early since I see your face enough between that and the club.”

Steve chuckled. “Still haven’t sold the place, huh?”

The brunette sighed. It wasn’t the first time Steve asked if he was going to sell the bar to focus more on writing. “Where the hell would you all hang out if I sold the place?” He liked the bar. It wasn’t just a great hangout for the club, but for his other regulars, too.

“There are other bars,” Steve teased. He said that, but he loved the bar, too. “You know I just want you to-”

“Follow my compass. I know. You’ve said that so many…” He stopped talking when he saw an unexpected angel walk into the room.

Well, angel was the word that came to mind since you were wearing a white dress and the light over your head illuminated you like a halo. But as his eyes swept over you, he wondered if there was a bit of a devil in you. He wouldn’t mind bringing that side out of you if you gave him the chance.

And here he used to think love at first sight was bullshit.

“Hey. Do you know her?” Bucky subtly nodded in your direction as you spoke to another woman, jealousy flaring up for a second at the thought of his best friend knowing you and not telling him. And if you knew Steve, that was that before things even started. While the blonde didn’t have much game growing up, he came into his own after his growth spurt, and everyone adored or wanted him.

Steve shook his head. “No, I don’t,” he said, making Bucky’s shoulders slump in relief before his friend scrutinized him. “Jesus, are you eye fucking her? You are, aren’t you?”

Bucky wasn’t the least bit ashamed. “And I’ll keep doing it ‘til she looks at me,” he replied, wishing you’d at least spare him a glance and get a look at him in his nice suit. Maybe you weren’t into guys with tattoos and piercings, but he was certain he could change your mind if that was the case.

“How long has it been since you’ve been on a date?” Steve asked. “Just introduce yourself like a gentleman and see where that goes.”

“A couple of months? Something like that.” Tearing his gaze away to glance at his inked hands, he chuckled. “You think I’m a gentleman?”

He could be dangerous and downright dirty when the occasion called for it, but just because he rode a motorcycle and covered himself in tattoos and piercings didn’t mean he treated others poorly. He was raised better than that. Even with his ex-girlfriends, things never ended because he didn’t treat them well. They just weren’t the one.

“We both know you are. Sometimes,” Steve answered, smirking as a beat passed. “And she’s looking your way.”

Bucky’s head snapped up to find you looking right at him with a curious stare. You had the prettiest eyes he had ever seen. Which was nothing compared to your smile. It was like watching the sun slowly rise to meet the day.

Fuck, he was being sappy. You ruined him with a single stare, and he wanted to ruin you in return. Make it so you wouldn’t want another man.

You whispered something to the woman beside you before she nudged you forward and he realized Steve pushed him to move, too. It only took three more steps before he was right in front of you, the gentle smell of your sweet perfume filling his nostrils. Need slammed into his body as you smiled again, and he actually felt the blue of his eyes shrink as his pupils widened.

If Steve thought he was eye fucking you before…

“Hey,” he said, his voice raspier than usual.

“Hi,” you said. It was a voice he could listen to for hours and he wondered what it would sound like when you said his name.

“I’m Bucky.” He took a smaller step closer, trying his damnedest to block out any other man around him so you’d keep those pretty eyes on him.

You introduced yourself, too, and it was a name he would never forget. “I like your tattoos,” you added almost shyly. Almost.

If he had his way, you’d see the rest of them soon enough. “Thanks,” he smiled, holding one hand up to show you. “Dressed like this, I bet you think I’m part of the mob.” After getting dressed and adding the gold jewelry, even he thought for a split second he looked like a mobster.

“Are you or is that information I can’t be privy to?” you asked, making him chuckle. You didn’t skip a beat, and he liked that.

“Not part of the mob, but I am part of a motorcycle club,” he replied. He wore his patch with pride and that didn’t seem to scare you, which was good. “I also own a bar.” He didn’t know why added that part. You didn’t ask and he didn’t want to brag, but there he was.

“So, you ride a motorcycle, and you own a bar?” You glanced back at your friend to ask her, “Do you mind if I…”

“I’m good. You two talk,” your friend smiled, giving Bucky an encouraging wink. He looked back to find that Steve walked away, too.

You smiled as you faced Bucky again. “Well, I’m happy to hear more about either of those things if you have time.”

“Yeah.” A lopsided smile appeared before he could stop it. “I got time,” he said. All the time in the world.

Over the next hour, the two of you stayed close together and talked in between looking at Steve’s pieces. He told you he was there to support Steve and talked a little bit more about the bar he owned. A hole in the wall kind of place he fixed up. While he wasn’t a big drinker, he loved making them for his regulars, and his profession allowed him to get away with all the tattoos.

“I’ll have to stop by sometime,” you smiled before it faltered. “If that’s okay.”

He didn’t want to get his hopes up, but his heart raced, and he wanted to see you smile again. “I’ll hold you to that,” he teased. “What about you? What do you do for work?”

You told him that you were a blood bank nurse and still fairly new to the area. While you didn’t have too many friends nearby, you liked your neighborhood and the one friend you had made invited you to the gallery since she was an art enthusiast. You also let it slip that you were single upon your move here, which he was happy to hear since he was, too, but he didn’t miss the note of sadness in your voice.

He could help fix it if you were lonely.

“I’m not seeing anyone either,” he stated.

You raised an eyebrow in disbelief. “You don’t have an old lady?” His eyes went right to your lip when he bit it. “That is the correct term of endearment, right?”

“That’s right,” he said, his eyes soft. “Both of those things are right.”

You bit your lip again and he wasn’t sure if you were purposely trying to entice him, but now he wanted to bite your lip. “So, do you do anything for fun outside of riding and work?”

He almost groaned when you said “riding” and he had to shake his head to keep his mind from drifting. He couldn’t think of you being on his bike with your arms wrapped tight around him or you riding him or anything like that. “Well…”

He explained that he wrote a bit in his spare time outside of work and the club. It was a hobby mostly, but it would be a dream come true to get his work out there one day. If not, that was okay, too, because he had a decent life and didn’t need much. His bike, his brothers.

But to have an old lady…

“Maybe I could read…” you frowned when you saw the time. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize how late it was. I should get going,” you said, disappointment filling both of you.

“Oh.” He scratched the back of his neck. The two of you were having a nice talk, and he hadn’t had a chance to ask about your hobbies yet. “It’s still kinda early. Do you really have to go?” he asked, realizing just how desperate he sounded. God, if the prospects could hear him right now… He just didn’t want the night to end.

“Yeah, I do. I’m actually working a blood drive tomorrow and could use the rest,” you said, smiling sadly. He felt like an ass for asking you to stay when you had work to do. “I don’t know if you’ve heard anything about it, but you’re welcome to stop by if you want to donate. I always have this fear that people won’t show, which I realize sounds ridiculous.”

Bucky mentally kicked his ass for not knowing about a local blood drive. He was usually more on top of those sorts of things. “Where’s it at?” You gave the location and time, which was all he needed. “I’ll be there,” he promised.

And every single club member would be there, too, if they knew what was good for them.

“Really?” you smiled, your hand bumping his when you turned to face him. “You’ll go?”

He let his fingers brush yours and he smiled to himself when he felt the light shiver. “Of course, doll.”

“Doll?” you giggled. He hoped he didn’t offend you. “I hope you show,” you added in a small voice, your gaze focused on the ground.

Frowning a bit, he wondered if you didn’t believe him. Did someone let you down before? “If I say I’ll be there…” He lifted your chin, so you’d look into his eyes. He needed you to see the truth in them. “I’ll be there.”

You exhaled, staring deeply into his eyes. “I’ll see you tomorrow then,” you whispered.

He grudgingly released you, knowing he had to. Besides, if he kept touching you, there was a good chance he’d pin you against the wall and show you what a work of art you were. “Good night,” he whispered, watching you go back to your friend. She linked her arm with yours as you glanced back, keeping your eyes on Bucky until you were out of sight.

He exhaled, mentally kicking his ass again. Why the fuck didn’t he ask for your number? You two hit it off, and you wanted to see him at least in some capacity beyond the blood drive, right?

Steve made a beeline for him as he stayed rooted to the spot. “It looks like you two hit it off. You know you didn’t even say hi to Chris or Sam or-”

“We’re going to a blood drive tomorrow,” he cut in. He hoped people would show, but he gave you his word he’d be there, and the club was all about giving back to the community.

The blonde’s eyebrows pinched. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Blood drive. Tomorrow. Everyone,” he said, giving his friend a hard stare. “You’re the president. Make it happen.”

“You’re the vice president, which means you supervise plans for club events or gatherings. That includes last minute things,” he pointed out, his eyebrows shooting up as Bucky got his phone out and typed quickly. “You’re serious about this?”

“Is it too much to say, ‘You better fucking be there or you’ll pay for it later’?”

The blonde grinned. A shit-eating, knowing grin, and he wanted to smack him. “This is all for her, isn’t it?”

Bucky sighed. He hadn't expected to meet someone so perfect tonight. “She’s a nurse and I wanna help. Besides, it’s good for the community and you’re all about that shit.” And he had to make a better impression after not asking for your number. “Will you at least promise you’ll be there?”

“To watch my whipped best friend fawn over a pretty nurse? Hell yeah.”

“Beautiful,” he corrected him. “She’s beautiful.”

And while Bucky would fawn over you tomorrow, he also hoped he’d get your number.

So, what do we think so far? Part of this writing style was slightly different for me, but I like how it turned out! I still need to give this reader a nickname and the AU a name, but this is a start. I can't wait for the whole club to show up at the blood drive. I also have something silly and cute planned for these two. ❤️ Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[cherrygirlfriend]

(not) lost and found pairing: reader x sistersfiancé!rafe synopsis: when reader has to return her sister's shoes, she sees her fiancé again. this time, in a different state than before. warnings: hurt and comfort, reader stitches up rafe wc: 1.5k

people have been wanting me to write more for them and i've been meaning to i swear!! just haven't gotten around to it lmao but more interesting stuff for this pairing is coming

"jenny, no." you sighed exasperatedly into your phone, "i already told you, no. i'm doing homework."

"but it's technically your fault?"

"how is it my fault that your drunk ass left your damn shoes in my car?" you scoff, and if it wasn't so typical of jenny, you wouldn't be able to believe the nerve she'd have to even say it was your fault that she was too drunk that she couldn't even remember to take her shoes.

"just take them to my place, alright! i'm on a trip right now and i don't need your shit."

"i'm not a damn lost and fo-"

before you could finish your sentence, your sister had hung up on you, and although you tried to call her again, she wouldn't answer. the bitch was ignoring you, as usual.

so, that was how you ended up driving to the house your sister shared with her fiancé while rain was pouring down the sky, your windshield wipers working overtime to make sure you'd get there without slipping off the road.

when you finally parked in front of the house you'd been at only a few days prior, you leaned the back of your head against the headrest, gazing at the lit-up windows of the home. you wanted so badly to not be jealous of the life she had, to not give her the satisfaction of knowing how much you'd always envied her; envied the way your parents had always preferred her, how you'd always felt more like a burden to them than a child.

taking a hit from a vape pen and tossing it to the passenger side of your car, you breathed out the vapor before getting out of the car, slamming the door closed behind you, flimsily holding onto your older sister's louboutins, a petty part of you wanting to accidentally drop them to the ground as you made your way to the door.

but when you reached the door, lifting your hand to knock on the door, you noticed it was slightly ajar. with furrowed brows, you stepped inside, your ears filling with the noise of loud shouts and sounds of glass breaking.

you placed down the heels as quietly as possible, pulling your phone out and dialing 911, holding the phone close to your chest as you walked closer and closer to the source of the noise, prepared to press call.

but what you came across caused your brows to furrow.

jenny's fiancé's back was facing you as he threw a vase on the ground, the smashing noise ringing in your ears as you brought your hands to cover them.

"fucking bitch!"

you didn't know what to do, simply watching the man throw a picture into the ground, the glass of the picture frame blending in with the glass from the vase. what used to be jenny's glamorous living room now looked like it was one of those rooms people go to smash up old electronics and plates, just missing the graffiti on the walls, but in place of them were a few fist-shaped holes.

when rafe picked up a glass of amber liquid to his lips, you figured it'd be your best chance to make your presence known, so you cleared your throat, saying his name in a soft voice. "rafe?"

the man turned to look at you, letting out a soft, dry chuckle as you pursed your lips, looking around at the wrecked room. "what are you doing here? is your sister drunk again? 'cause if she is, she can sleep on the fuckin' lawn for all i care."

"no, she just left her shoes and..." you shook your head, taking a few, wary steps towards the man, pocketing your phone. "what's up? did something happen with...?"

"your sister?" rafe let the now-empty glass fall to the ground, a few drops of whiskey now decorating the pile of glass as it smashed, rafe collapsing onto the ground, leaning his head against the back of the formerly-immaculate white couch, that now seemed to be covered in red wine. "that'd be the understatement of the century."

you noticed a gash on his arm, a rather large piece of glass sticking out, red blood staining his white sweater, "rafe, you're bleeding."

the man chuckled, looking down at the cut and shaking his head, "i didn't even notice. woops."

"let me go get my stuff."

"it's really-"

"shut up." you say sharply, rushing outside to your car.

you were kneeling next to rafe, the man pressing a cloth to where the piece of glass had been lodged in while muttering something under his breath while you poured disinfectant onto another cloth. "this is gonna sting, but if you're gonna be a baby about it, i'm gonna let you bleed out."

rafe let out a small, nearly inaudible chuckle and the ends of your lips twitched slightly upwards, "i'm pretty sure i'm not gonna feel it with how much whiskey-"

his sentence was interrupted by a loud hiss he let out when you took away the cloth he'd been holding against his arm, starting to press the one with disinfectant against the wound, your lips curving into a proper smile.

"is my pain funny to you?"

"no." you looked at rafe to see a small smile on his lips, "it turns me on."

rafe let out a guffaw at your statement, shaking his head as you began putting monofilament thread onto the curved needle, the man's brows furrowing as he watches. "how do you even know how to do all this?"

"you don't know?" you let out a chuckle, "of course, why would i assume my dear sister ever speaks about anything other than herself. i'm studying to be a doctor."

"i didn't know that." rafe watched as you brought the needle to his wound, "have you done stitches before?"

"on fake skin." you shrug, starting to stitch up his wound, "so, why did you do all this? you're lucky that thing didn't lodge any deeper."

"i could've just gone to an actual hospital."

"yeah, but wouldn't you rather give your future sister-in-law some practice?" you said, not noticing the way rafe was gazing at you, your tongue peeking out, your brows furrowed in a way that caused small wrinkles to appear on your forehead. "spill."

rafe let out an exasperated sigh, looking away from you, instead focusing on all the broken glass on the ground. he'd have to figure out a way to fix it before jenny got home.

"your sister's cheating on me."

a small oh left your lips as you continued.

"i saw texts on her phone before she left. she told me she was going on a work trip for the law firm she's interning with but she's currently at some hotel with the guy she's seeing."

"she... she always told me she was going out with you, at least once a week, but i'm starting to realize it's not true, is it?"

you chewed on your lower lip as you continued stitching the wound, letting out a soft, quiet, "i'm sorry, rafe. i see her like, once a year on christmas."

rafe nodded his head slightly, "lucky you." the man chuckled dryly, "it all just... made me feel like i'm not enough. that no matter what, the people around me are gonna keep betraying me. that i can never trust anyone."

you let out a soft, humorless chuckle. "i know how that feels."

"you do?" rafe looked down at you, as you finished tying the end of his suture, cutting the thread.

you sat up straight, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear as you started packing away your stuff. "everyone's always preferred jenny over me. everyone's always picked her over me. my parents always preferred her. every guy i liked always thought she was prettier. all my friends always thought she was cooler." you chew on your lower lip, your throat starting to hurt from the emotion you were trying to hold back, avoiding his gaze, "my entire life, i spent living in her shadow. my entire life i've been 'jenny's sister' and nothing else."

"that can't be true."

"you know what my parents' reaction was when i got into med school?" you chuckled dryly, your eyes turning glassy as you finally looked to rafe, "'that's great sweetie. anyway, did you hear that jenny got engaged? her ring is so gorgeous. oh, and she's doing so well in law school!'" you mimicked your mother's voice, letting out a sigh. "and jenny thrives from it. she's always loved that she's better than me. even as kids, she did everything she could to one-up me."

"she's not." rafe took your shaking hand in his, enveloping it in his larger one, "you just stitched up a half-stranger when you could've just left when you saw me destroying shit. your sister would never do something that selfless. i don't even think she has a selfless bone in her body."

"you're starting to sound like me." you let out a chuckle, shaking your head, "how come you're engaged to her, then?"

"maybe i don't have any either." rafe shrugs, "but i'm not letting her get away with this. i'm not someone to be messed with."

"that sounds ominous."

"you have no idea." he smiles, squeezing your hand.

[silverjirachi]

I cannot emphasize to you enough that the sonic movies are unreasonably good. they do not follow the formula of being a cash grab that so many other big name franchise movies do.

Yeah there is cheap humor in it sometimes but it’s a kids’ movie, also sonic as a character has always been saying cheap corny stuff and not only that, but every single time there is a gag or a joke it is played completely straight. It’s never out of character, particularly sonic’s lines. I keep thinking about how they’ve made it clear that part of his joking and banter is out of insecurity, a “hahahah i need to talk to diffuse this situation” type of thing. i’m particularly thinking of the “haha who does your highlights” thing in the current movie. Shadow rightfully responds to this like “???? what the fuck dude??” because it’s treated not just as A JOKE but an actual, motivated part of the dialogue that the other characters respond to.

Honestly the person who has the most jarring gags is Robotnik but even then it works for his character because he’s just.. that unhinged. There is a full, sudden 4th-wall break in sonic 3 and i almost didn’t care because if anyone was gonna do it, it would be him. It was kind of a funny “i’m at a movie premiere” moment so it worked in the theatre, but i wonder how it will be received and age for people watching at home. But EVEN THEN, these out-of-sequence moments are so rare, and what they do is add to the tone of the movie, which takes itself seriously, but also reminds us to not take it too seriously. They walk this beautiful delicate balance of being a serious movie fully invested in its own stakes and circumstances while also being movie actualizations of cartoon characters. It centrally hinges on the principle that in order for any humor to work in a performance, the actors (and the story) must still be motivated and fully invested as if everything around them is a real circumstance. All three of the sonic movies have mastered this as an art.

Every single actor puts so much thought and love into their character, and the writing does not assume people will like it “just because.” It is so clear that story is the priority rather than ticket sales, and so they end up creating beautiful moments that serve the characters arcs as a piece of art and storytelling rather than just what’s gonna sell. There are literary devices in these things man. Sometimes they’re a little overemphasized, but again. Kids movie. And the thing is, these moments are woven into the parts that do sell. It’s genuinely phenomenal. It’s like a masterclass on good storytelling.

The sonic movies are one of the few rare “other media” movies that do not cop out just because they’re kids movies. That do not cop out just because they already have an invested fanbase who would come anyway. They are a testament to what happens when everyone on the team from the top down cares about the story and the characters. When they let people who are genuine fans of the content work on it. The movies abound with niche and subtle fan references (even memes!) but you blink and miss them. They’re never distracting and again, never played for JUST being a gag or a reference.

What I’m saying is I came into all three Sonic movies as an already established fan who would see junk anyway, preparing to be disappointed, and got ART instead??????? And they’re still putting out bangers three (hopefully four! AND a spinoff!) movies in??????

[soulfulazrael]

HAHAHAHAHA! OH MY GOD THIS THING BROKE ME!!

Oh my God! Please Viv. Scream more to the people in the back how evil she is! Come on. I AM SURE THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO EARS OR EYES ARE STILL NOT GETTING THE FULL PICTURE NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WILL SMASH IT INTO THEIR HEADS!!!

I am broken! I am actually broken... by that and Awaria game which I beat on Hard Mode. Don't play it like that. Enjoy your life. It's not worth it.

But that gave me something to say... I write better than Viv. No more BS about different interpretations or points of view. No.

This is garbage and I feel insulted that this even left whatever piece of shit writing room. Really? You expect me to believe Octavia would choose this absolute shitheap of a character? Really? Just... Your audience is kids. You want to deny it and say how they should not watch your show, but this is who you write for. But worse, because those fucking shows had decency to TRY! I want to beat myself with a stick for even implying you are comparable to Gravity Falls, Scooby Doo Mystery INC., Courage The Cowardly Dog or Over the Garden Wall. Jesus Christ.

I write better story than this in Hellaverse. Called Song for the Quiet Bird. Yeah. I am no longer afraid to say I am a better writer. You can check it out here if you want and tell me if you agree or not. I will accept it if you do not agree. Always nice to hear that.

This shit broke me. It broke my mind. I don't care about this show. Crash your head against the wall a few times Viv, maybe then you will discover some standards!

FUCK!!!!

I broke... I really did. I don't care about this show's story and if you care about your own mental health, stop caring for it as well. Not like it will help, I am pretty sure there will be lots of morons arguing how this is good writing... And I don't care because I will only get dumber from that. Just... hire an actual writer Viv. For once.

[aloysiavirgata]

Will you write me a post-Fight Club fic? They’re bruised and beat up and I want to read about it.

Kersh had said Sweet fancy Moses when he saw their injuries and ordered them either home or desk bound until such time as they would not terrify small children with their countenances.

***

Scully slouched against the wall with an ice pack on her face. She did not want to be here, but she didn’t want to be anywhere else either. People stared and she hated it more than she hated paperwork. She had practically worn a groove in her apartment floor from caged pacing.

Mulder was using a tape dispenser to grind Excedrin tablets into a powder. He rubbed it on the insides of his swollen lips like cocaine.

“Ow,” he observed. He didn’t get the fun medications until he went home, which he didn’t wish to do because it was boring. He carried his injuries with a certain swagger.

“I thought Mr. Saperstein was going to show you some in-your-face, smack-down moves so you could quit getting your ass kicked so often,” Scully said.

Mulder scowled at her. He grabbed a pad of paper from the desk and wrote YOU’RE LOOKING PRETTY ROUGH YOURSELF XENA. He tapped at it until she looked up.

“The Lorax is coming for you, Mulder,” she warned.

He was finding it difficult to talk clearly with a wired jaw but, because he found it impossible to refrain from making smart remarks, he was on his third legal pad.

WELL EXCUSE ME BUT I WASN’T EXPECTING TO HAVE TO EITHER TAKE A CANE TO THE JAW OR PUNCH AN OLD LADY

He added a frowny face and several exclamation points to emphasize the complexity of the situation.

Scully examined her reflection in the back of a spoon. Either Lulu or Betty - Scully couldn’t remember which thanks to the concussion - had launched herself off the ropes and onto Scully. She had led with her forehead.

“Burt Zupanic,” she mused, readjusting the ice. “Of all the men to fight over.”

SWEET-ASS PERM, Mulder noted, unhelpfully.

She laughed, which hurt. Most things hurt at present, her pride included. She’d already had three cups of coffee this morning, but after surviving all her various maimings, Scully was confident her organs could handle it. She emptied the pot into her Stanford mug.

Mulder tapped her arm. HEY I AM ORDERING SOME CLAM CHOWDER FOR LUNCH. DO YOU WANT ANYTHING?

“Clam chowder through a straw, ugh, Mulder. Besides, you’re not supposed to have anything with chunks in it.”

THEY ARE BLENDING IT UP FOR ME. MILKSHAKE OF THE SEA.

She gagged a little. “That’s vile.”

PROBABLY. IF THEY MAKE ANOTHER MOVIE ABOUT US I THINK WE SHOULD NOT MENTION THIS PARTICULAR INCIDENT.

As though he actual movie had been so much better. She cringed every time she thought about it. At least the COPS episode conveyed her reluctance and irritation. “Pinky swear.”

He held his own finger out and she hooked hers around it.

THE PACT IS SEALED

“Hey Mulder?”

“Hmmm?”

“Do you want to get the hell out of here, go take some of the really good painkillers, curl up in my bed in our underwear, and watch bad Lifetime movies until we pass out? I don’t have chowder but there’s leftover tomato bisque with your name on it.”

FUCK THE CHOWDER LET’S ROLL

They were out the door before the ink dried.

[safination]

If You Know, You Know.

Big Four Edition (❤️💙💚💛/ ❤️🦅🏹🐯) + One Extra

|Masterlist| Characters: Adam, Vox, Alastor, Lucifer, Charlie, Vaggie. x Reader (Separate) TLDR: Dates around the area with them A/N: Welcome to my dumpster of a mind, where I try to place our beloved Hazbin characters into four to five categories. Will I be explaining any of them? Probably not. Listen, if you know, then you already know. Also, I can't believe I'm falling into this stage as a creator in a fandom. You can take me out of my roots, but you cannot take my roots out of me. Fuck me, honestly. This is the most self-indulgent shit, ever. If anyone irl found out who I am, I would die. Like literally die. Please don't come for me. Yes, this is 100% playing into stereotypes, but it's all in good fun. Nothing I write here says anything about you as a person or a large body of people. Plss lang. Sige an po This is all in good fun, I promise T_T

Adam — 🏹

Come on, this is an easy one. This thing is practically writing himself. Adam would 100% be here. Hatid-Sundo si baby boy by kuya Drivers niya. I can imagine Adam doing such an obnoxious laugh and then going, "Ay, gagi!" ( plus points for the elitism and the momol in hidden spots. I've seen yourFreedomWall)

Adam would walk you around the buildings, especially if you can't go inside. Why is it so hard to sneak inside? He would constantly take you to that one really good burrito and taco place (If you know it, then you know.), and would go to the Power Mac to buy stuff for you because why not.

Vox — ❤️

Hear me out a little. This is Vox we're talking about. So, despite being the type who belongs in the 🦅, at the end of the day, this is still Vox. This holds true considering that . . . uh . . . debate (?) surrounding those who should be accepted into ❤️. While Vox could go with the 🦅, he would snatch up a spot in ❤️. (But like, this is isn't his fault. It really is the fault of the system in place, and we're all proud of Vox because it is a big honor to be here.) Like Adam, Vox would be Hatid-Sundo, and would hang out in UP Town most of the time.

Dates would Vox would include going to Gino's or Nono's or cracking open the books at Tyler's. It would take forever to get anywhere with him because he refuses to walk anywhere, and would either always be driven there or would book a Grab. Plus point for traffic, but you get to bond and talk with him during the traffic.

Alastor — 🏹

He doesn't like being an 🏹 despite majority of the people being really chill and cool. But it's most likely because he bumps into Adam. He's practically crawling up the wall. He sees the life of those in 🏹 and gets really confused at how they act. He rants to Rosie (who would be in the all girl's club) about it all the time. Unlike Adam, Alastor will hop off at Vito Cruz.

Dates around the bay area and MOA, honestly. He would make you listen to his radio broadcast that I do know they have. All four have their own organization. Alastor would take you to Star City, and would insist on walking there because it's walking distance daw, and tricycles are low key a scam there.

(Again, please, don't come for me. 🏹's are mostly chill but come on. You can't deny it. I've seen what the streets look like. I've seen the Power Mac. The aircons.True 🏹 would find it funny.)

Lucifer — ❤️

I don't need to explain why Lucifer would be here. Let's be fr. I will fight anyone who says otherwise.

But unlike Vox, Lucifer would take long walks with you around the oval and the Sunken Garden. Fuck it, I'm even bold enough to say that he would join the run club there if you were into that type of thing. You would eat fishballs and kikiam. There would be no kwek-kwek or balut tho. When you get tired, you and Lucifer would sit by the fountain with the Statue™. Lucifer would take jeepnys with you to get around. If you don't go there, majority of date time would be spent trying to find you a restroom to use.

Charlie — 🐯

I debated placing Charlier either with the maroons or the tigers, but ultimately decided that it would be nice for Charlie to be with the tigers. I don't know how to explain it. It just makes sense to me. Charlie would always have an umbrella with her because rain or shine or terrible rain, she would go.

Charlie will take you to paskuhan at the soccer field to see all the lights and the concert. The food dates around that area would go hard. Like seriously, damn. Charlie would constantly take you to Lover's Lane, and explain all the history of the buildings.

Vaggie — 💙💛/ All Girls

This post is supposed to feature, "the big four" but I don't care. I can do what I want. It's fitting that Vaggie would be somewhere where it's all girl. (That recently started accepting boys too. So that's nice.)

Dates with Vaggie would involve CBTL, but in Regis Center instead of UP Town. Sometimes, you would cross over to ❤️to find something to eat. Tricycle rides to get around, and Siomai would be such a constant in your dates.

[moriitis]

okok hear me out, what's your take on Jeff or being in an relationship with Jeff? Only if you want to write him though!!

What would it be like dating Jeff The Killer?

Content/Warnings; knife play, violence, suggested graphic/sexual themes, mentions of abuse.

MINORS DNI. 18+

Jeff is written in his 20s in this. This is just how I perceive him.

Red flag central. He's not a good boyfriend, he's an apologetic asshole that gets off pissing you off. Won't talk about his feelings to you, will make snarky comments and become very territorial over you. Most of it is his own insecurities, frankly he's a shitty person and he has no idea why you would willingly want to date a piece of shit like him.

He will have his moments where he'll be somewhat nice but automatically you'll assume the worse or be suspicious of him.

Much like Toby, he'll take things too far. Jokes that aren't funny or even tipping your glass back so that the water goes all over you. He's an immature dickhead and finds it hilarious.

When he is nice, it's usually because he's feeling sorry for himself more than anything and just is needy for your attention. Wouldn't really picture him as a touchy person; but given in certain situations he is. Like when he's roaming his hands all over you.

Gets super grouchy when he hasn't killed anyone and you'll feel it. He'll be short, snappy and annoying. He fucking loves when you encourage him to find someone just to slash their throat open though.

Really not a big fan of sensitive s/o's. Can't deal with his own emotions let alone yours and he's not going to fucking babysit you. You get up and deal with it, life's a bitch and it sure isn't going to change for the likes of you.

Likes being talked down to, so like's a person who can put him in his place and have a sense of control over him.

More vulnerable at night time, when it's quiet and just the two of you. Comes to his senses a little more, will maybe apologise for being the kind of thing he is, talk about his past but very rarely.

Of course, he'll tease you but sometimes his teasing can become really personal and he'll jab at your insecurities.

Deep down he just wants to be loved but puts up a very hard wall to try and protect himself.

Will beat whoever pisses you off. Violence for him is better than any words combined. You want this person dead? Name them and he'll sort it for you.

Is the biggest shit talker, loves spreading rumours and talking shit behind peoples back. Wouldn't do it about you, but if you wanna vent and wanna talk some real mean crap about someone; he's all for it.

Knife play. Will fuck you with a knife.

Aside from his red flags, he tries to work on them around you. Took him awhile as he's a stubborn bitch, but if he knows he's hurt you; then he'll apologise. Just don't expect it to happen straight away. You guys could argue and then a couple months later he's apologising for what he said and how he acted.

And on that, he would never, NEVER, lay hands on you. He knows better than that and if he ever found himself in a situation where he did; he'd cut his own fucking hands off.

Aand don't expect him to remind you about medication, he'll forget.

Compliments !! But every time he does, he's blushing and trips over his own words.

Something about tracing his fingers along your collarbones really does things to him.

i dont see the hype with jeff so personally this was lowk a little hard for me to write LOL. but i tried sorry it sucks anon.

i just cant see jeff being romantic, all i see is an asshole lol. but he tries ok?

[holyblanchett]

To all the people saying Agatha is not a lesbian because she never said so explicitly, neither did Billy (I don't know if he did in the comics, but the comics and the MCU are different universes at this point) he never said explicitly "I'm gay" and no one is saying he could be bi, but of course with lesbians they had to say it out loud, having it tattooed on their forehead, writing it in the walls with the blood of an unicorn, for people to start thinking they might be lesbians... Like be for fucking real, just say you hate lesbians

that part! so tired of them questioning her sexuality marvel will never explicitly confirm anything they never have. Media literacy is dead bc ain't no way you watch aaa and think she's anything but a dyke 😭

[srldesigns6277]

Why is it that whenever I wish to scream, I am at work?

[wifeyoozi]

Imagine (gn!) you as the 14th member of seventeen and Jihoon your group mate has the biggest fattest crush on you. Everyone in the group knows this and finds it very funny because Jihoon is a loser who doesn't know how to act around his crush or show his feelings and you're an oblivious idiot who doesn't realise the very obvious fact that jihoon is wholly and entirely in love with you.

You two are always clingy to each other because Jihoon is your best friend (:D) and ofc you'd love spending time with him! And Jihoon is just going with the flow trying to ignore hoshi and dk who're constantly at his ass to tease him about it. You are almost like a couple in everything you do except you are just two best friends in a group.

So time goes by (prolly years, let's say) and eventually jihoon does some shit and confesses to you and you two start "officially dating". You tell the good news to your group but everyone is just so unsurprised with no trace of any reaction just ._. and jeonghan taps both of your shoulders appreciatively and says, "congrats, you two are the last to know that you are dating."

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

me stubbornly forcing myself to drink green tea and rest from my THIRD COLD THIS MONTH

[shima-draws]

Grips my shirt and tears it apart so that all the buttons go flying and SCREAMS I love Law and Cora so much what the FUCK!!!!

[dxxtruction]

Personally, I think the “That’s how it happened right? You standing in my blood, stroking my hair?” Was how it happened. Louis is just super detached from that headspace he was in before, and validly wanting not to have it be true that he didn’t, at one time, care about Claudia being gone, would be reasonable, and in character. Blaming Armand, partly, for why things got to be like that is correct. Though in this instance is misdirected to include things Armand did not in fact do to get it to be like that, but had, very much, done in a recent unrelated incident. He's essentially combining two events together to get it to align with his current set of beliefs. (Surely everyone's looked back on a situation before and saw it differently given time to think or feel differently about it. Get differing information, and so on. The show is directing us to that a lot, if not making it one of its major themes.)

But I say this is probably, almost definitely, the case, because Louis story beats need to be told accurately lest it take away from his character arc, as well his whole character and its complexity. Obstructing from his, very powerful, highly emotionally driven, story in a way that's frankly offensive. Armand having total and complete control over it, is bullshit. While, he does this though, to himself. Does a character armor on himself to get away from his own flaws, and role, in how things came about. Not intentionally, because it is emotional, and a lot of times just a result of blocking out that trauma. But this is something he’s seen doing often - Not remembering situations in the light in which they’re most accurate, and in so doing painting himself better sometimes, and others worse. Straight up forgetting, or overlooking information, and so never reevaluating why certain things came about until this moment. Not accurately applying the emotions of then, to the way he feels about it now, because he can't, or couldn't previously, actually remember it in that way. As he doesn't connect to those feelings, even those memories. His feelings in a lot of ways keep clouding his memories and his judgments of them.

Daniel gets at this too, where he brings up the tapes, and how Louis was basically just raving the whole time, and this story all happened differently then. It's the same story beats, yes, but it's all so emotionally different to the point where information gets completely changed around, even looked at like it's forcefully constructed to be a certain way, and not actually, therefore, accurate. Louis always tells an emotional story, and that’s important. It places him in time and continuum, in his own history as opposed to outside of it. That’s like, I think a history that can’t be overlooked, even if it's a history that's subject to change. And shouldn't history be? Shouldn't we look back on events that took place in our lives differently? Isn't that how any society grows? And why shouldn't Louis judgments be clouded by his emotions when that's the reason for most any other characters actions? Isn't that the story being told here?

[beanghostprincess]

(Sanuso NSFW / Not explicit tho)

If Sanji ever caught Usopp smoking I think he'd moan on the spot and would start malfunctioning. Like. His brain would instantly stop working and it would only be filled with Usoppsmokingusoppcigaretteusoppusoppusopp- And while he's having a whole sexual crisis wondering why the hell he finds Usopp smoking so hot, Usopp has no idea what the hell is going on.

Imagine Usopp smoking just because he smokes from time to time, just not as much as Sanji because that's fucking insane for an average person like him. And suddenly he has his boyfriend stuttering and blushing and visibly shaking next to him because he's... Smoking? Usopp finds out rather quickly that for some reason that does something to Sanji.

My brain is going wild with ideas right now but... Let's say Sanji ends up sitting on top of Usopp and let's say Usopp shotguns Sanji. The cook is a whimpering mess and Usopp isn't even trying to be sexy.

[mokeonn]

I think that the 2010's media landscape of Buzzfeed articles about plotholes in disney movies, Cinemasins critiques, and Watchmojo Top Ten scenes in movies that make no sense has truely ruined a lot of media. People are afraid that their work will be torn down if they dare leave a single thing up in the air, if they dare ask their audience to suspend their disbelief.

All too often nowadays I see stories (especially fantasy), take the time to explain how every small aspect of the world works and how it all logically makes sense. The constant time stopped to explain why an event happened, how this object works, or why this is important to the characters. It's just really not needed and it honestly makes a lot of stories worse.

I am of the opinion that the best stories truly just drop you into their world and explain nothing. They just take you through the story of this world and you just have to accept it and continue on. "When he became king, the land became barren." I don't want the story to stop and explain why this is, or how it happened, I want us to move on so we can just assume that the king has such rancid vibes that everything died.

[greasydumbfuck]

also just for the record. no matter how much utterly stupid shit i say or draw about him, frank actually makes me so deeply sad. this old man should be picking up his grandkids but he cant. i think about him too much and im so sad