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cepheusgalaxy · 8 months ago

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"So, you wanna make them ace?"

Asexuality 101: Making your characters asexual

Indroduction: Ok, so, from what I've seen in fandom and in general, most people don't really know how to write an asexual character. Many just quit it and make them allosexual, others just struggle their way without having much of a guide. Prime example is Alastor from Hazbin Hotel, whom many people want to involve in sexual scenarios so they go with the "asexuality is a spectrum" route. Problem is, they don't understand how asexuality is a spectrum exactly and then they just end up writing their characters as allo. Now, how to avoid this? Teaching them!

If you're looking for a good way to get started with your own asexual oc, an ace headcanon or a media charater, I've got you! (i mention sex briefly here in some parts)

My credentials: I'm ace.

The basics

What is asexuality?

Asexuality is a sexual orientation that is generally defined by the lack of sexual attraction, or a very little amount of it. Sexual attraction is many times confused with libido, which is the sexual desire. Sexual attraction is more accurately, "the desire of having sex with this specific person." Therefore, some ace people do have a libido, and do want to have sex, but mostly are just not attracted to a person.

Myths and misconceptions

Asexuals can't have sex - as many shippers say, "asexuality is a spectrum", and while some aces don't have sex indeed, they can want it and have it as well. Person to person scenario

Asexuals don't know nothing about sex - unless the ace in question is a child, they probably may know, in fact, a lot. Many ace people like reading, watching or consuming smut, and by this and other means, even if they don't have sex themselves, they pretty much know how it is and how it works. Sex is everywhere, after all. Hard to miss

Asexuality is caused by trauma - it can be! Just not always, and most aces are simply born this way

Asexuality is a medical condition - much like homosexuality, asexuality is frequently treated as an illnes and many ace people are forced into conversion therapy. Some people also hold the belief that asexuality is caused by an anormality in a person's hormones, a mental illness, etc. But it is not true! Asexual people can obviously also be mentally ill in some way, but these are different things. It is just a sexual orientation like any other!

Asexuality is caused by HRT - hormone replacement therapy, ie. taking testosterone or estrogen, is one of the most common type of medical transition for trans people. Some hold the belief that taking hormones like those can "break" your sexuality (estrogen does sometimes decrease a person's libido, but it depends on the person's organism and it doesn't take your sexual attraction away from you), and turn you asexual

Asexuality is caused by autism - this myth may be originated from the fact that many autistic people are in fact asexual, or by the fact that both asexuals and autistic people tend to be infantilized a lot. However, as much as autistic people are very commonly also ace, asexuality is not, in fact, a symptom of autism

Basic terminology

Ace - short for "asexual".

Aro - short for "aromantic"; someone who experiences little to no romantic attraction, aka typically "doesn't fall in love".

Allo - somebody who does experience attraction. "Allosexual" is someone who is not asexual, and "alloromantic" is someone who is not aromantic.

Aspec - short for "a-spectrum". The a-spectrum is an umbrella term for anyone who is in any way ace, aro, aplatonic, afamilial, or other identities that fit here.

Acespec - short for "asexual spectrum/ace spectrum". It's a part of the a-spectrum and contemplates all asexuality.

Aesthetic attraction - finding someone pretty or beatiful, without necessarily wanting to have sex with them. Many ace people who didn't know they were ace report to having used to mistake it with sexual attraction.

Sensual attraction - similar to sexual attraction; the desire to touch someone, but without wanting to actuall have sex with them. Many ace people also confused this with sexual attraction.

Aphobia - discrimination against aspec people.

Amatonormativity- the belief that everybody is happier in a relationship, wether they want it or not, and should want and seek to be in one, and the general root of aphobia.

The Split Attraction Model

If you are looking on the ace community for a while, you might have heard of the split attraction model--if you haven't, here it is:

Image description: The Split Attraction Model, a cross chart inside a square, with four ends. The first end of the cross is labelled "ace", its opposite is labelled as "alloce", the third end is labelled as "alloro" and it's opposite is labelled as "aro". The section on the "alloro" and "ace" square is labelled "alloromantic asexual", the section in the "ace" and "aro" part is labelled "aromantic asexual", the section on the "alloro" and "alloce" square is labelled as "alloromantic allosexual" and the section on the "aro" and "alloce" section is labelled "aromantic allosexual". /end ID.

The split attraction model divides all orientations in four groups: The aroaces, the aroallos, the alloaces and the alloallos. It is usually shortened to "SAM".

Many people find this model useful, because it sorts your attraction into two groups: allo- and a-, and yes and no. It's simple and easy.

Many aces do not use this model to explain their attraction/lack thereof though! Hence the first distinction of aces we have here: SAM-aces and non-SAM-aces. Basically aces who use the Split Attraction Model and aces who prefer not to!

A non-SAM ace may define their asexuality as their romantic orientation as well, or label themselves differently altogether. While a SAM ace could call themselves an "asexual aromantic" or an "asexual alloromantic", a non-SAM ace could call themselves just "an asexual". In this case, they can be neither "alloro" nor "aro".

If your character is aware of their sexuality and identifies as ace, it's good to know wether they use the Split Attraction Model for themselves or not.

The spectrum

You may have heard that "asexuality is a spectrum" a thousand times, but what does it mean?

Just like "non-binary", "asexual" can be an identity on its own, but it is actually an umbrella term for a bunch of orientations. When we say that it is a spectrum, we are saying that there is Nuance. "Ace who doesn't date", "ace who dates", "ace who experiences just a little bit of sexual attraction", "aces who like sex" and so on. 'But Angel', you ask me, 'didn't you say that asexuality is when people don't have sexual attraction?' It can be! But there IS nuance, and that's what I am here to tell you.

There are two more factors beyond the SAM that you can consider:

"Are they sex repulsed, sex favorable, or sex neutral?"

Here is the "aces can still have sex" thing. A sex repulsed ace is probably what the majority of people think when they hear "asexual". It is an ace person who doesn't like sex. Doesn't want to have it, is disgusted by it, despises sexual intimacy, etc. They are the aces who tipically just don't want to have sex, and are very happy without it.

A sex favorable asexual is someone who likes it. Sure, they don't feel sexual attraction, but who's letting it stop them, right? They like sexual acts, they are fine and happy with having sex in general, and that's what the "aces can still have sex" point means. Yes, they can, if they want to! Maybe your character themself doesn't define themselves as neither repulsed nor favorable, but it's good to know what their instance on sex is.

Sex neutral asexuals are aces who are not repulsed by it, but are not really into it either. They may have sex, they may be fine with it, they may like it even, but they generally don't have a desire or strong feelings regarding it. It's just sex, after all.

Sex ambivalent asexuals are another thing I want to touch on. They are tipically aces whose instance on sex changes! Sometimes they may feel repulsed by it, sometimes they may want it, sometimes they may not care. They are neither strictly one, nor another. Their feelings change!

It's good to see where in this categorization your character or blorbo would be.

Inside the asexual spectrum, where do they stand?

If I were to represent the ace spectrum as a linear thing, I'd do it like this:

Image description: A linear representation of the asexual spectrum, in the shape of an arch. In one end, it is written "asexual", on the other, it is written "allosexual" and on the very middle, at the top of the arch, it is written "gray-asexual". /end ID.

or like this:

Image description: Another linear representation of the asexual spectrum. One of the ends is a black circle and the other is a white circle. Between them, a gradient goes from one circle to another, passing through different shades of gray. The black end is labelled as "asexual", the white end is labelled as "allosexual", and the gradient with shades of gray is labelled "different kinds of Gray-As". /end ID.

What is graysexual, you ask me? We all know that the world is not black-and-white, and as so, sexuality is also not. Grayace is a term for a person that is also asexual, but not strictly: that is, they are the "feels a little of sexual attraction" part of the spectrum. It is called like that because when we put asexual and allosexual in two ends of a spectrum, graysexuality stands in this gray area.

Gray sexuals may:

Experience sexual attraction only sometimes

Experience light sexual attraction

Experience sexual attraction under certain conditions in certain scenarios, for example, when they are already very intimate with a certain person

And many more! Graysexuality is on itself a spectrum, but having an idea of allosexual -> graysexual -> strictly asexual is already a good guide. Graysexuality can also be described as "having partial sexual attraction".

Fun fact about gray-aces: The asexual flag has four stripes; purple, white, gray and black. The purple stripe is meant to be a color signifier of the community, the white means allosexual, the gray means the gray aces and the black stripe represents people with strictly no sexual attraction. Hence the term "black stripe asexual" (which is not very popular but I personally like).

Micro-labels

You already have a basic understanding of the asexual spectrum and how it works, so you can think on where exactly in the spectrum your character/blorbo is. To help you out further, I present you the microlabels! Much like non binary is an umbrella term with many microlabels like genderqueer, xenogender and demigender, that help one explain their identity with more and more specific explanations, asexuals also have a lot of microlabels! Here are some:

Cupiosexual - asexual person that wishes to have a sexual relationship (example: i am cupioromantic person and i am basically a hopeless romantic and a yearner. cupiosexuality is similar, but with sex)

Gray sexual - asexual person with partial sexual attraction

Demisexual - asexual person who can only be attracted to people they already have a bond with

Abrosexual - person whose sexuality is fluid, and may be asexual at one time, bisexual at another, gay at another, etc.

Aceflux - asexual person whose sexuality changes, like abrosexual, but only between asexual identities

Aegosexual - asexual person who likes the idea of sex or fantasises about it, as long as it doesn't envolve them

Lythosexual - asexual person who is only sexually attracted to people they are not close with, and their sexual attraction fades out once the become closer

Myrsexual - asexual person that uses multiple asexual identities to describe their sexuality

Aroace - aromantic asexual person

Alloace - alloromantic asexual person

Apothisexual - sex-repulsed asexual person

These are not all micro labels in the asexual spectrum, but they are quite a lot. Maybe even if your charater is not sure if they are in a certain label or not, you may find them in some of these descriptions.

Links to resources with more microlabels: Tumblr post by @aroacesafeplaceforall (no images) /

/ A slightly longer list on asexuals.net (undescribed flags) /

/ Another guide for microlabels on lgbtqia.fandom.com (undescribed flags)

Bonus questions

Is it okay if I make my asexual character autistic? Is it not stereotyping? Yes, it's okay. There are actual asexual autistic people, and I'm sure they'd love to get represented as well!

Is it okay if I make my asexual character have sex? Is it not erasure? Yes, you can do that too! As long as it is where they stand in the spectrum (as explained in the topics above), you are doing a good thing by representing sex-favorable asexuals.

Do I have to make a romantic orientation for them too? No. Your character may be a non-sam ace, and identify as ace alone!

I heard that it is erasure if I make smut fanfic of ace character X. I don't get it how! While it is true many ace people have sex, many people when writing that just ignore their sexuality when writing/drawing smut of them! The spectrum is wide, so when you are doing that, remember where they stand on it.

Why can't I headcanon this ace character as allosexual? I headcanon straight characters as gay/bi/pan all the time and nobody says it's wrong! If people don't like my headcanon why can't they just look away? Because asexual people are a marginalized group, unlike straight people, so it is as okay to make them allo as it is to take an asian or black or jewish character and make them white. Because it is not just an individual headcanon; it's a part of a much bigger problem, and by avoiding headcanoning ace characters as allo, you are confronting your own internalized aphobia, which is a good thing! If you still want to make them have sex, well, that's what I made this guide for! So you can make them have sex as you wish without erasing their identity.

I am ace and am basing myself or my own experiences here. Is it okay if I...? The answer is generally yes. If you wanna write about a different ace experience than your own, a little bit of research won't hurt, though!

Is this enough for me to write my ace character? It is a start. This is a general guide, and there are some things I haven't touched on this guide (like aphobia) so I'd advice you to do more in-depth research on topics you want to focus more on, but this should get you pretty far.

Extra

"Is Alastor from Hazbin Hotel canonically ace or aroace?" (slightly related, because some people looking for this guide to write this guy might want to know this too)

Answer: link to a post clearing this up this with some sources. Short answer though, is that he is confirmed to be ace, not aroace.

"If I didn't understand something here, or I have more questions, can I ask you?"

Answer: Yes! You can reblog this post with questions, and my inbox is also open, and I make sure to always let anon on. I will be happy to help if I can.

"One of the image descriptions on this post was off or confusing, can you change it to X so it is better to understand it?"

Answer: Of course! I will need you to signal me in either the notes or in the inbox what I need to change, though.

"Are asexual people queer?"

Answer: Yes! Because the queer community, as the name suggests, is for people who are different, odd, and are not considered "normal" because of that. Asexual people are not a part of "the norm", because we don't feel sexual attraction, and therefore, we, and by extension your ace characters too, are queer.

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dhddmods · 7 months ago

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Intersex Guide!

Hello and happy pride! We wished to share a passion project we have been working on for months - a guide to intersex traits and variations! Please reblog to spread awareness.

Now, a question that many ask - what is intersex? Well, we will be answering that question for you here! Anything on this post that is written in red is NOT intersex, so if you wish to skip over any of it, you can. And if you wish to get straight into the intersex types, scroll down to the read-more and start from there.

Intersex, also known as the intersex spectrum, is a term used to describe when someone's biological sex - as in the sex they are born with/what they naturally develop during puberty - is not clearly defined as the typical male or female sex traits.

(This does not include someone that was born male or female, and later chose to have their sex traits changed due to being transgender, transsex, or altersex. It also does not include males that experienced circumcision/dorsal slits or penis splitting, females that experienced genital mutilation, or males & females that indulged in modifications such as piercings and beading.)

This only applies to primary sex traits - chromosomes, genitals, reproductive organs, and hormones. Atypical secondary sex traits (breasts, muscle tone, body/facial hair, deepness of voice) do not make someone intersex unless it is paired with "abnormalities" in primary sex traits.

Before you can understand what it means to be intersex, first we must clarify what it means to not be intersex.

A typical male has XY chromosomes, a penis, two testicles within the scrotum, and more androgens (mostly testosterone) than females. Upon puberty, they usually (but not always) develop more facial hair & muscle tone than females, and a deeper voice than females.

(Note: A penis has a phallus, a scrotum beneath the phallus, foreskin protecting the head of the phallus, and a urethra on the head of the penis. It is is straight or slightly curved when erect.)

A typical female has XX chromosomes, a vulva, two ovaries, a single uterus, and more estrogen than males. Upon puberty, they usually (but not always) develop larger breasts and wider hips than males.

(Note: A vulva has two labia, a single pea-sized clitoris, a single vaginal entry, and a urethra above the vaginal entry and under the clitoris.)

Here is a list of non-typical sex traits that, by themselves, are not intersex.

Accessory Breasts (Polymastia): Having more than two breasts. Accessory Nipples (Polythelia): Having more than two nipples. Athelia: Having only one nipple, or no nipples at all. Amastia: Having only one breast & nipple, or no breasts & nipples at all. Breast Hypertrophy/Macromastia/Gigantomastia: Having extremely large breasts Gynecomostia: Breasts on a male. The reason this is not considered intersex is because all sexes (except for people with amastia) have breast tissue, which can vary in size regardless of sex. Females can have small breasts, and males can have larger breasts than is expected. Hypotonia: Low muscle tone. Bicornuate Uterus: A heart-shaped uterus. Septate Uterus: A uterus that internally has a partition down the middle. Macropenis: A penis that is 7 inches/17.78 centimeters or larger. Macroorchidism: Testicles that are 4 milliliters or above pre-puberty, and above 30 milliliters as an adult. Macrovagina: A vagina that is deeper than 5 inches/13 centimeters. Labial Hypertrophy: Labia that is longer than average (above 2 inches/5 centimeters)

Now, onto the intersex spectrum! First, some notes.

-An intersex trait is a singular atypical trait. For example, someone with ambiguous genitals, but no other "abnormality" has an intersex trait. -An intersex variation is when multiple atypical traits are present, with at least one of them being an intersex trait. For example, someone with ambiguous genitals and fused kidneys has an intersex variation. Equally, someone with ambiguous genitals and cryptorchidism also has an intersex variation. -CTF stands for "close to female." CTF traits are when the traits are predominantly "feminine" (vulvas, uteruses, ovaries, estrogen as the main sex hormone, breasts, widened hips, XX chromosomes, etc.) -CTM stands for "close to male." CTM traits are when the traits are predominantly "masculine" (a penis, testicles, androgens as the main sex hormones, increased hair growth, higher muscle mass, a deepened voice, XY chromosomes, etc.)

Also, when we state that an intersex trait/variation is "fairly common", we mean that it is fairly common amongst the intersex population, not that it is fairly common in the general population. Being intersex is still classified as "rare" statistically speaking (as statistics define "rare" as 1 in 1,000 people.)

So for the sake of this post, here is how we are classifying the following:

"Fairly common" = 1 in every 5,000 (or less)

"Rare" = above 1 in every 5,000, up to 1 in every 100,000

"Extremely rare" = above 1 in every 100,000

Similarly, when we say "higher risk of _", it does not necessarily mean that risk is very high, just that its a higher chance than a person without that trait/variation. It could be as low as 1% higher of a risk. Every sex has its risks, whether its male, female, or on the intersex spectrum. To put it into perspective, females are at a higher risk of breast cancer than males.

Also, keep in mind that "may include" means that not all of the features will be present on every single person with that variation; in fact, none of the extra features could be present. However, for chromosomal variations specifically, it is highly likely that at least 1-5 (or more) of the listed extra features will be present.

And finally, when we say that "fertility is average", what we mean is that the gonads are fully capable of producing healthy average numbers of sperm/eggs, and/or the uterus is capable of carrying healthy babies. Struggles with the sperm reaching the eggs still might occur, but if direct insemination is done (as in the sperm is directly injected), then pregnancy should occur perfectly fine.

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Penile Traits/Variations (not including those on the agenital spectrum)

Urethral Traits/Variations (not including those on the agenital spectrum)

Ambiguous Genitals

The Agenital Spectrum/Agenital/Agenitalia

An umbrella term, describing those born with no genitals, closed-off genitals, small genitals, or genitals that are missing typical penile or vulval traits.

(Anorchia & Monoorchidism fall under this as well.)

Gonadal Agenesis

An umbrella term, describing an individual that is born with an absence of one or both gonads (ovaries, testicles, or ovotestes).

Other reproductive traits/variations

Hypergonadism

An umbrella term, describing an individual that is born with gonads that produce high levels of hormones compared to males and females.

Hypogonadism

Primary Hypogonadism/Hypergonadotropic Hypogonadism: when its the gonads themselves that have low production levels. The brain is still communicating to produce the average male/female levels of hormones, but the gonads are failing to keep up with the brains-signals.

Secondary Hypogonadism/Hypogonadtropic Hypogonadism/ Central Hypogonadism: when the brain has low levels of communication with the gonads. The brain is failing to send out typical levels of signals to the gonads, and the gonads only produce hormones when a signal is received.

Other Hormonal Variations

Chromosomal Variations

And thats all!

Again, please reblog to spread awareness. Intersex people are highly discriminated against. Their bodies are still regularly mutilated at birth, in order to make them "look right."

This mutilation can cause complete infertility, a loss of sensation in genital areas (making sex unsatisfactory), gender dysphoria, body dysmorphia, and even chronic pain.

Additionally, intersex children are often bullied at school for looking or sounding "abnormal" for their age/gender. And as they grow up, they face the same difficulties transgender individuals do - judgement for not being a "real man" or "real woman" (or for being non-binary), difficulty dating, struggles finding jobs, complications in receiving proper healthcare, and they are at an increased risk of being abused and assaulted. Many are also left out of sports or kicked out of public bathrooms as well.

This is all due to the lack of education. Tolerance and acceptance needs to be taught to children. Many doctors have no idea how to treat intersex patients, as they didn't learn about their bodies, even in advanced schooling. We need to put a stop to this.

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