#The rabbit very much still recognizes the first person
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seravphs · 1 year ago
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ੈ♡˳·˖✶ — RIN x FEM READER
True love stares you in the face and calls you an idiot. 
wc — 1k
tags — fluff, post enemies to lovers
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“Do you find me lovable?”
Rin squints at you. “Where is this coming from?” 
The question is wary, like you’re setting a trap, and he’s the rabbit that’s dumb enough to fall for it. To be fair, when you do mess with him, he does fall for it every single time. 
But not this time. 
“Don’t you think I’m annoying?”
He rolls his eyes at you. “Yeah, actually. Super annoying. Worst mistake of my life.” 
You stretch your leg out to kick him in the shin. He rips it back, yelping. 
“Be serious,” you scold. 
He blinks at you. When Rin is confused, it’s very obvious. He never manages to be ugly - it’s those sexy Itoshi genes - but his confused face comes the closest. He squints like he’s smelled something distasteful and his entire face screws up. His nose crinkles. His mouth puckers. 
Rin is, at heart, a very simple creature. If it’s not about football, he doesn’t tend to think too hard. He’ll make the attempt for you, but in general, he’s a little less developed than other people his age on important concepts like emotional awareness. 
You decide to throw him a bone. “Like when we met, remember?” 
It’s a memory that you laugh at now (okay, not now, because you’re in a mood at the moment, but in every other scenario). At the time, however, you went home and screamed into your pillow to escape from cringing at yourself every five seconds. 
It was your first day working for the Japanese National Football Team. You had been so excited to be here! Of course, it’s more glamorous to be playing the actual sport, but the team can only function at their best because of people like you.
Scanning in with your fancy new lanyard feels so professional. You still haven’t gotten over the excitement of a new job yet, and it’s written all over your face. Your new boss laughs when you tell her profusely how grateful you are to be here. She’s kind and funny. You can already see yourself fitting right in. 
“I don’t have too much for you right now,” she says. “Why don’t you go meet the team?”
Your eyes practically sparkle with delight. “Can I really?” 
“Sure! Just tell them I sent you,” she says. 
The football pitch isn’t attached to the main building, but a short walk away. Your head is in the clouds as you all but float down the sidewalk. You still can’t believe you’re really here, but when you pinch yourself, the world remains as clear and vivid as it was before. This is no dream. 
This is a nightmare, actually. The gates that allow you into training grounds are locked with a code that no one told you. You flutter around it, trying to decide what to do. Should you go back and bother your boss? You don’t want to seem stupid on your first day. You look around, but you don’t see anyone to ask. You pace around the lock again. 
You don’t know where to go. If there was someone you could ask, you wouldn’t know where to find them. How is it only your first day and you’re already messing up? 
“What’s the hold up?”
You gasp and whirl around to find Itoshi Rin, one of the star players who came out of the Blue Lock program. You’re starstruck, but that quickly fades as he pushes past you to put the code in. He doesn’t even hold the door open for you, leaving you to rush to grab it before it swings shut. At least you’re inside the facility now. 
The coworkers you meet are much nicer than Rin. Even though your boss told you not to work today, they’re so friendly you don’t mind pitching in. As the players trickle in to warm up, you run around offering water bottles and balls. It’s starting to feel like an okay day, especially because Rin doesn’t seem to recognize you from this morning. 
When you offer him a bottle, he takes it with a nod of appreciation, so you know it’s not personal. It’s not that reassuring to think that he might just be a bit of an asshole, but at least it’s not targeted. 
Whatever your feelings on Rin are, he’s undeniably an incredible player. When he scores, every member of the staff stops to watch the arc of the ball. It’s perfect. It’s a thing of beauty. 
You’re working up a sweat yourself carrying out the tasks you’re asked to do, so when the team finally wraps up, you’re grateful to finally start heading home. You pick up a stray ball heading your way and deposit it in the nearest basket, but a hand catches yours before you can let the ball drop. 
“Are you stupid? That doesn’t go in there,” Rin says, taking it from you and trotting across the field to another basket. 
Your jaw drops. 
You hate this man. 
But in a few months, he’ll take you on your first date, and you’ll be head over heels. You still don’t remember why or when it happened, just that one day Rin showed up with an apology and a dedication to doing better. 
“When did it change?” You ask, curious now. 
“I dunno,” Rin says. “Probably when you called me stupid after I fumbled the keys you gave me.” 
“What?” You laugh at him. 
“I’m serious! I was like oh, that was kind of shitty of me.” 
“Sometimes I wonder how you’re still alive.” 
“I’m a professional football player, not a therapist,” he says. 
You hold your tongue about how emotional awareness was not a trait relegated to therapists alone. 
“Anyway,” he adds, reaching for you. You stumble and nearly fall on top of him, but he doesn’t mind. “You’re still kind of stupid. But that’s what I like about you.” 
“Rin,” you say, slowly like you’re talking to a very dumb toddler. “You forgot to hit start on the washing machine this morning.”
It doesn’t phase him. “I know I’m stupid too. That’s why we work.”
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muzzlemouths · 7 days ago
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Apologies if this has been asked already, but is there any chance we might get to see what those conversations between sun and moon were like? I just started reading (Don't) Fear the Reaper and now that I know they talk when Sun is quiet, I can't help but wonder what's being said.
When I eventually get around to writing the follow-up fic (which will explore the story from Sun's pov) you'll get to see each and every conversation they had!
Since I'm not sure when that will be (and I have a rough version of what it might look like already written up in my notes) I'll go ahead and drop it here for you to chew on in the meantime :3
This conversation occurs in their personal cabin when y/n first finds out about Moon's existence. I've left the original lines in for context, but they'll be indented so you know what is and isn't internal.
“We?” You watch with growing curiosity as he freezes in place and winces, like he’s just been caught in a lie.
“Sun—”
“I know, I know.”
“Fix it.”
There it is, again. That distant expression like his mind is somewhere else entirely. You aren’t sure if robots are capable of internal monologue, but if they are, his must be pretty intense for the absolutely guilty expression he wears before smothering it with another mocked up smile.  “Me and…Moon,” he answers, voice pitifully small. 
“What are you doing?”
“It’s better to be honest, isn’t it? They’re going to find out eventually.”
“No. No. You’re going to say something you shouldn’t.”
“I can handle myself in a conversation just fine, thank you very much. I have so fa—”
“You don’t know when to shut up.”
His smile falters, eyes panicked like a child being scolded.
Moon. You recognize the name from the conversation with Oscar earlier, how scared he had looked from the mere mention of it. You aren’t entirely sure how to navigate this situation, but if this Moon has everyone up in arms, there must be a good reason for it, right? “Is he…dangerous?” 
“....Well? Am I?”
“Oh, now you want me to talk?”
“Just thought they should know all the grisly details, since you seem keen on being truthful.”
Sun hesitates to answer. He bides his time by tending to your ankle, instead. Carefully drawing your shoe away like a reverse cinderella, then gently turning your ankle in all directions to get a feel for the damage. 
“You’re not being fair.”
“Go on, tell them.”
“I don’t think that’s a good ide—”
“Tell them how I butchered her. How I didn’t stop until her pulse flickered under my hand.”
“Moon—”
“Tell them how much I regret letting go.”
“I—”
“Tell them how often we think about her blood caking our palms. How relieving it felt to finally—”
“It doesn’t feel broken,” he tells you. 
“Don’t ignore me.”
“I think you might have just twisted it. Should be in tip-top shape by morning!” He faces you with that telltale smile once more, only for it to droop significantly when you don’t immediately mirror his relief. It’s not the answer you’re waiting for. 
“Hypocrite.” Moon snarls. “Cornered yourself. Now you’re the animal stuck in a trap.”
“Little rabbit…” he sighs. “You are very, very lucky, you know. This could have been much worse.”
Pebbles climb in your throat, brought on by his words. Each bigger than the last and taking up space where you need to breathe. They rattle with every inhale, collecting in great heaps the longer he fits you with that emotionless stare. You don’t think he’s referring to your ankle, anymore.
“Cruel. Warning a rabbit with one foot already in a trap.”
“They’re smarter than you think.”
“It’s too late to save them.”
“...I know.”
“Then why bother?”
A twig snaps just outside the door, relieving you of his piercing gaze as his neck wrenches to follow it. Just a squirrel.  “Sun, I—” “Anyone can be dangerous,” he whispers, eyes still zeroed in on the animal.
“Caaareful.”
“I told you, it’s better to be honest," Sun's optics twitch ever briefly. "They ought to know it isn’t you they should fear.”
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sorensolsikke · 2 months ago
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i hate how people don't recognize me as a dragon.
like, they do see me as the dog i am!! at some point, every friend of mine tells me that i am the golden retriever friend!! everyone says my hair looks like cute ears!! they tell me "aww big puppy eyes" and "oooh biig stretch" without a second thought, without knowing my identity, and that's so validating, i love my friends and siblings!!! i am indeed a puppy for them!!
BUT FOR FUCK'S SAKE WHY DON'T I LOOK LIKE A DRAGON TOO?
i constantly question my self-knowledge by this; i think i know myself well enough, but nobody – except my girlfriend – seems to notice certain traits of mine that are the core of my identity. like i am sure i am unpredictable and unrestrianed when i am full of rage, or especially when i am protective of someone. i remember scaring the crap out of people who tried to hurt me or my loved ones when i seemed vulnerable at first glance, but oh i know my voice and claws and i don't fear pain. how can people still only see that i am patient and hard to make angry. they never believe me when i say i am scary and unstoppable when i get mad. and then they shit themselves when i finally do.
i demand being respected like a wild animal.
people also laugh at me when i say i am a good leader when i have to take that role. they know me to startle easily, being rather laid-back and quietly understanding than determined and in control of the situation. they don't even notice that these traits are compatible. they don't even seem to understand that i have been the oldest sibling at the hardest times, when our bare survival was at risk. i've always been, and always gonna be, the pack leader in every given critical situation, and will stand back after the problems are solved. (and i am also a verse/switch. if you know what i mean.)
i want to be recognized as strong and forceful, because i am.
people don't even understand that i am vain and full of pride. they genuienly think i am humble, even tho that's very, very far from me. i did learn how to say a genuine sorry and how to lose a competition. but i am almost pityfully proud, will collect compliments, will make sure to look perfect, always. let's just say, i don't despise flattery. and others still seem like they REFUSE to believe i have bad traits?!? other than, you know, autistically clumsy and sensitive??
i am a DRAGON for fucks SAKE, not a cutesy fucking RABBIT.
i am vain, i'm a horder, i am strong, determined, forceful, calculating, cagey, protective, and feral.
and i don't even get started on how i see myself dragon-like in the mirror, not just where my phantom limbs would be, but also. my canine teeth stand out a lot more than others, because they grew incorretly. my tongue is long (humanwise i mean), and i step on the first half of my feet. there is nothing humble in my posture. how can't they see how can't they how
...in fact there is someone who notices. my girlfriend has seen me as i am, from the very first minute. they didn't create an unrealistic idea of my delicacy. i adore them so much, they are the most insightful person i've ever known, and they still chose me. they are somehow the only one who understands my ferality, and somehow they are also the one who would do everything to stay with me. their existence does ease my rage of being misunderstood... but i can't escape the idea that i learnt masking so well that any controversial trait of mine became invisible. i am afraid that i became something like an animal in a zoo; acting domesticated, but in fact a ticking bomb.
i am a dragon. and i WANT people to notice finally.
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lineli225 · 1 year ago
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Shigaraki Tomura, Izuku Midoriya, and their past selves in Horikoshi's other works, an Analysis.
How their archetypes can be traced back all the way to Hori's oldest works!
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Today I finally felt with the energy to write this analysis I've been cooking in my head for some months!
I'll be pulling apart the core elements of each of Hori's past work's protagonist duo and how they are essential to everything Hero Academia has became
It will be long.
First things first, let's start with Horikoshi's first work ever!
1. Tenko One Shot.
This tale tells us the story of two main characters, Hana and obviously, Tenko!
Hana is a woman aspiring to be a samurai, she is hopeful and stubborn, but is shunned down by most and ridiculed by other samurais for being, well, a woman wanting to be something only men can be.
But just like Izuku, she is VERY stubborn, and won't give up her dreams at all.
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( You can read the full thing here btw! https://imgur.com/a/v7oBkfx )
Our second protagonist, and main tittle of the story, is a little boy called Tenko, who she meets when he literally attacked her lol
Like Tomura, he has the power to decay anything he touches, and is in seek of revenge, his goal is to destroy all swords after his mother was cruelly killed by a samurai.
Despite all the hatred the feels, he is still a kid, suffering and crying in seek of relief for his grief.
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He is known as a vandal, and is being wanted dead or alive by the authorities for interfering in battles.
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Hana, gentle and caring, notices the pain in Tenko and takes him with her, to take care of him, after all, he is just a child.
But after being found by an official, believes she has the chance to be recognized as a samurai if she give Tenko to the authorities, and well- it obviously goes terribly wrong- as she is attacked by them instead.
Suddenly realizing how cruel they truly are, she takes her own sword and fight them to defend Tenko, making Tenko also realize, swords can be used to protect and save.
In the end, they end up to saving each other, Hana saving Tenko's heart, making him realize his hatred will never lead anywhere, and lift the weight of his chest by winning a friend, and Tenko making Hana realize war is more than what she thought.
Tenko obviously, is literally Tomura's first prototype, the decay power, the white hair, the hatred, guilt and grieve are all there.
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But what if I told you Hana is also, pretty similar to Izuku? Both have a dream that is deemed impossible to reach, due to something they lack, and are a joke to most people, but despite it all they never give up, and manage to reach their goals. They are also strong but gentle and caring ( ngl Izuku might even be more soft than Hana ajhdka)
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2. Oumagadoki Zoo
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This one, guess what, also have a female protagonist, yes also called Hana.
Aoi Hana is a bubbly, awkward and stubborn girl with her head in the clouds, but teased by everyone, known as "good for nothing" and useless.
She then decides to get a job during summer break, to prove she is more than capable of helping.
As an animal lover, she gets a job at the local Zoo as a cleaner, but she discover that the Zoon principal is a literal bunny person.
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Shiina, the other protagonist of the story, is a man-child dude, he was cursed as a kid for being mean to a bunny, turned into a rabbit until he learned to be kind and help animals. Much like Tomura, he is short tempered, a gremlin, a little bitch!
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He created the zoo to try to break the curse, and now counts with Hana's help to do so. The zoo, by the way, is also full of cursed half human half animal people!
The manga was canceled, so Hori had to rush the end, it has only 5 volumes, but I believe it would end with Hana finally breaking Shiina's curse.
Well, the similarities to Tomura? Once again through the roof, he is literally Tomura without depression (and scars and wrinkles)! He is a brat, selfish, intelligent and powerful, but incredibly dumb, he even refers to the other zoo people as "comrades" the exact same word Tomura refers the League of Villains as! They even sit down the same, careless way! Bad posture kings 🦐
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Now, I think you noticed that Hana's story is also familiar? Yes! IZUKU
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Both are deemed useless, are clumsy and awkward, and have pretty much low self esteem, but are kind, gentle and loving, and have an altruistic heart!
Just like in Tenko, Hana is key to saving Shiina's heart, and both learn a lot with each other, as Shiina sees the worth in Hana, and Hana sees the kindness in Shiina, evolving each other to the better.
3. Shinka Rhapsody One shot
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This one is pretty much lost media, very few people know about it, but i found a thread about it
(thread here https://twitter.com/HeroFletch/status/1273054822162456578 )
It is literally MHA but the quirks work in a different way
This time the first protag is the man and the girl is the second, but it doesn't matter lol
The story happens in a world similar to the one of the raise of quirks in MHA, criminal rate is all time up.
The protagonist Magari/Masashi(idk) is, again, a guy with strong personality, seeking for revenge and power, as his family was murdered by a serial killer
He got a power similar to Kirishima's, but oh boy his face and personality is just Tomura all over again, Hori's favorite OC
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And guess what??? Ohh he also has a female companion helping him???? YES HE DOES!
Her name is Aoi, yes, like Aoi Hana from the zoo one, yes guess what, yes, bubbly awkward, yes.
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She is an aspiring detective and has the habit of asking people if they like Katsudon, her favorite food.
Wait... Katsudon? As favorite food... Where I saw this before-
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4. Boku no Hero One shot.
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here if u wanna read https://yesmangas1.com/manga/boku-no-hero-ym23733/one-shot#1
This one is a break to the pattern, no Shigaraki look alike, no Aoi Hana, but, someone who is pretty similar to her in personality:
Jack Midoriya
Jack Midoriya is a quirkless man in a super society, his job is to sell support items, but he is too awkward, clumsy and stubborn, causing more problems than helping, he has an impossible dream of becoming a hero, so he tries to become the first quirkless hero! (it goes wrong)
There is a girl in this story too, i guess she is this Izuku's Uraraka, they are both literally the same in personality, so i guess hori Split Hana in two for this one.
5. Barrage or Sensei no Bulge
(the second tittle is so funny lmao)
This time hori completly threw everything out and said: fuck the pattern, fuck Hana, fuck Tenko wanabe!
It has literally nothing to do with anything he did previously. Astro, can be similar to Izuku, but hmmm not fit the mold, so i'll just skip lmao, it also was canceled, ending in 2 volumes anyways.
SUMMARY AND CONCLUSION
So far, we can conclude a very recurrent pattern in every work Horikoshi publicized (except barrage lolz)
Protagonist 1:
Is a gentle, caring, stubborn, clumsy and awkward person, they have a heart of a hero, but are often seen as weak, useless, and stupid for dreaming too high. They can be strong when they want to, but feminine and loving too, they are altruistic, loyal, and focused. Their role in the story is to find their own self worth, as well as help the 2nd protagonist break free from a torment.
Protag 2:
A selfish, childish, mean and also stubborn boy, who's heart is filled with hatred, hurt and grief, they are cursed somehow, and besides having a rough exterior, deep inside they are still just a child who seeks relief. Their role in the story, is to after Protag 1 advances, open up and allow themselves to be saved in heart and mind.
Of course, due to the past series length of few pages to only a few volumes, they open up to each other and befriend rather quickly, but MHA is well- 40 volumes long by now, ofc course P.2 will give much more trouble to open up, it's not that easy to cure someone's bitterness and guilt!
Which leads to Horikoshi's last work, My Hero Academia.
The story of protagonist 1 incarnated as a mix of every character Hori wrote before as Izuku Midoriya, a quirkless boy who feels useless, but has a big dream, a kind heart and the desire to save.
And also the story of MHA's society's biggest victim, a childish man who has been hurt in every possible way, by every person he dared to trust, be it his own family or his "sensei", Tomura Shigaraki is nothing but a child at heart, crying onto his puppy, waiting for the one who will save him.
This is undeniable, I was already sure with everything I've read in MHA that Tomura is getting saved, Izuku yelled it himself, and the narrative is walking towards that.
But after analyzing Hori's part works, and see how wholesome and hopeful his stories are, how he desires to transmit the message that everyone deserves a second chance, i have no doubt.
Tomura is DESTINED to be not only saved, redeemed or live, but to have a happy ending and finally have a friend to trust.
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As every story so far ended with the kind one befriending and becoming a pillar to the hurt one.
Izuku and Tomura are more than the heart of My hero Academia, but also the heart of everything Horikoshi wants to tell to the world.
They are fated to end the same way every time, in every universe.
BESTIES ARC IS COMING.
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flying-nightwing · 2 years ago
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I gotta know.
In your professional opinion, do you think slade knows the hand on the lower stomach trick and the pillow trick?
Do you think anyone else your write for knows them? 👀
hehehheheHEHEHE 👀😏
I believe Slade knows, and knows it *very* well. HOWEVAH. Him using either entirely depends on whether or not he cares about the pleasure of the person he's having sex with. He's definitely not using the techniques on someone he's having a one time thing with, that he never wants to see again. Can't afford to have someone trail after him begging for more and/or have them recognize him out of all things because of it if he's on a mission or smth, y'know? bc yeah that will happen he's that good (man's got an ego to the moon). But if it's someone he wants around? Someone he wants to see again? He's never gonna tell them that, that's for sure but that orgasm WILL bring them back to him without fail. every. goddamn. time.
As for the other characters, Bruce knows them. And he's good at it. Selina taught him and it changed his mf life. He definitely uses them more leisurely than Slade, Brucie's a giver in bed and he just LOVES to see his partner's soul ascend from what he's doing to them. He's got a reputation to uphold and he'll literally die before he lets down a partner of his.
Dick knows too. I refuse to believe he wouldn't. But I feel like he would act like it's something incredibly normal. Like, he wouldn't even notice he's doing it, and he'd genuinely be surprised when his partner reveals it was the first time a man did that to them (eventually he'll realize that not everyone actually knows that or are bothered to do it, but he still wouldn't treat it as a special event kind of thing). He's just out there, casually raising the bar for everyone else. Dick game strong in every sense of the term babes.
Jason's case is a bit more complicated. If we take him right after his resurrection, them no he doesn't. Jason died a virgin, I will die on that hill, and whatever happened with Talia didn't actually happen I don't know what you mean. Bro's caught up in revenge and taking over a crime empire, he does NOT have the time for a game of dating and seduction. He's under so much stress, oh my god. And when he begins to chill, his partner is Roy, and Jaybird's not the one on top babes (again, HILL I WILL DIE ON). But Roy does teach him the trick so older Jay knows too. When he uses the tricks, it's already bc he trusts his partner enough to see him naked and vulnerable so it's pretty much always in a sweet way.
Since we're on the topic of Roy, well, he obviously knows. Roy "I seduced a dangerous international assassin to the point where she had my kid" Harper absolutely knows and he's SMUG about it. As the Youth™ says, bro's got rizz. He knows your exes weren't as good as him. By the time he's done with you, you won't even remember you had exes.
Tim read about it one time when he fell down a rabbit hole of research after opening the internet to (initially) look up romantic gestures idea. He tries to use it but it turns awkward the first few time, bc he treats it like any other skill and it just breaks the mood. Until he can find someone he trusts enough to practice with, he'll just refrain from doing it.
Steph knows. And she will openly criticize the men in her life that doesn't. Being ego checked by Steph is probably the most mortifying thing ever. "Oh? You don't know about those? Yikes... That's embarrassing. Yeah. Yeah no you should take down that tweet about being a sex god, yeah, you're just embarrassing yourself more now. Please stop" She's braver than any US marines.
(that's pretty much the main ones but if i forgot any lmk)
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secret-bug-pain-blog · 8 months ago
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Febuwhump Day 28 - ALT PROMPT - Human Weapon
You can also view this on Ao3, here. This took us long enough to post that we feel fully justified in getting it beta read and such before posting. This work is a ship of Theseus compared to the original we had done in February because we kept revising the outline for the main work this is based off of. At the very least, we think it's solid now.
Thanks to @wormlette for beta reading this for us, and we hope you enjoy.
In the first few hours after getting the tattoos, he isn't thinking.
There are more things to worry about than what the things stabbed into his skin mean, at that point. He's stuck in the back room of a place he doesn't know, shaking with the remnants of a paralytic he can't identify and grappling with the aftershocks of the most pain he's ever felt in his life, with an ominous list of instructions rattling around his head and no idea if he'll even be capable of leaving.
He's not thinking straight, and he knows it, but he's too thoroughly in shock to do much about it, so he doesn't. He sits on the dingy bench in the back of the room, and he stares at the lines inked into his hands, and he listens to the tallman tell him care instructions as he tries not to think about the way a single slip of a sleeve could get him jailed for life.
There are runes etched into his skin. There's dark magic inked into his flesh. There's a person talking just over his shoulder who tells him that he'll need to pay her back for the procedure, because even if his friend vouched for him, her expertise doesn't come cheap - and he's stuck with a bill he needs to pay, for a procedure he never wanted, and the creeping awareness that the sounds of beasts fighting from just beyond the wall are just a bit too human for it to be just normal monsters.
The tallman that she called his friend walks in, and the moment that he recognizes him the blood roars in his ears with the bitter, bitter memories of betrayal.
And then he's trapped in a room, with a curse inked into his skin, and a man who tried to feed him to monsters barely a few feet away.
It is a very, very small mercy that Laios manages to find him here. He's astounded that he even managed to find him, honestly - tracking things on cobblestone is difficult enough with half-foot senses, let alone tallman senses. Still, presence is one thing, and actually helping is another - and Laios merely being there does nothing to stop the tallman in the room with him from picking him up by the ankle and holding a jack-knife to his throat.
The pulse of magic that runs through his body is new. The pain flooding his senses is not.
Something in his body shifts, joints pulling out of alignment in a way that sets off alarm bells in the back of his head. He dangles, abruptly, a few inches lower, his spine crackling and popping like sand in the delicate gears of golden machinery, and every inch of the runic tattoos spread over his skin lights up with the sensation of being stabbed with thousands of needles. He thrashes, some instinct in him saying to kick out, and-
When the pain clears, he's toppled over on the floor, every inch of his body itching with something new and wrong. The tallman who signed him up for this is dead on the floor, his head nearly three metres away from his body in a quickly-spreading pool of blood, and Laios is staring at him as if he's never seen him before.
His hands are covered with deep brown fur. His stomach feels like it's been abruptly overrun by starving beasts. When he looks down at his feet, he finds himself looking at an entirely too long set of rabbit's paws.
It takes him a bit longer than he's comfortable admitting to realize what it is that's been done to him. Laios reaches out to help him up, tentative in a way that he's never really seen from him before - there's a snide remark welling on his tongue about it, something barbed and bitter and colored by years of being manhandled before then this is what finally makes someone think twice about hauling him around as they please - but the words die on his tongue, caught in a throat that can no longer form words and drowned in the overwhelming pain that flares the moment he tries to pick himself up.
His body aches.
Searing pain rolls through his muscles every time he moves, like he's been boiled in oil again and somehow left alive. Every motion he makes only seems to make it worse - the burning rolls along any limb he tries to move, searing deep into muscle and bone. The first hint of weight on his feet erodes his nerves as if they've been dipped in acid, and even just trying to walk is, if anything, worse - like trying to walk with red-hot spikes imbedded into his soles.
This form feels alien, strange, wrong- and it takes all too long before he figures out how to make himself turn back.
The rabbit form withdraws back under his skin, bones shifting and flesh warping in a halting, agonizingly slow display he has to force himself to keep going through. The magic subsides. The pain does not.
Muscling through the sort of soul-deep agony that the transformation inflicts is far, far easier said than done. Thinking coherently, when he's grappling with consciousness through a haze of pain that makes it feel like he's dying every time he moves an arm, is even more so. Knowing this doesn't make it easier to think, nor does it make it less horribly, horribly embarrassing when he realizes that he's got nothing on but the thin, flimsy, tallman-sized dressing gown he was wearing when he first woke up.
The realization that he's been trotting around in a bathrobe so oversized that it makes him look like an actual child would, in any other circumstances, be just about the worst part of his day. This situation is already far past horrible on so many levels that at this point, it barely registers.
At the immediate moment of time that he notices it, it's also largely overpowered by the realization that there are slits in the back of the dressing gown, and the fact that he's horribly, horribly humiliated himself in front of a party member, badly enough that his most remote chances of it being forgotten are as good as dead.
It's a unique kind of awful, even without the curse bands on his wrist, to realize just how much of himself might've been bared against his will. It's even worse when he thinks of how the other races tend to view half-foots, and the way that rumors tend to proliferate between adventurers, and the fact that it's Laios, of all people, who came across him. Laios, who couldn't keep his mouth shut if his life depended on it, who talks about monsters like no one else he's ever known, who's just seen him turn into a monster-
Chilchuck takes all of five seconds before his pain-wracked brain finally catches up with the facts enough to foretell the imminent end of his adventuring career, at which point his joints finally decide to give up the ghost, and he narrowly stops himself from falling face-first into cobblestone, just to put the cherry on top of the entire awful ordeal.
He's about five steps past even being capable of dragging his thoughts together enough to try and think of some way out of this horrible situation, to the awful modifications stabbed right into his body, to the idea that whatever's been done to him has run deeply enough to behead a tallman without even consciously trying, when Laios offers him one of his spare shirts and he's forced to come to terms with the realization that the world has simply decided to stop making sense entirely.
He's battered, exhausted, and grappling with enough awful revelations to choke a nightmare to death on the bad dreams alone. He's on his hands and knees in a room that belongs to someone he doesn't know with arterial spray spattered on his skin and a soldier's strength curse stabbed into his body. He's too far past done to try for more than the barest hint of dignity, still stuck in a dressing gown so fine it's nearly transparent, and...
Well. He's not really sure he even has enough left in his brain to try and get himself together.
He takes the shirt.
He tries not to speak, while he shuffles it on. He's painfully aware of just how bad the situation is, and every movement he makes feels like he's exposing himself all the more. The way his skin burns every time something so much as brushes the new-laid tattoos doesn't help in the slightest, and the slide of coarse fabric over skin is almost more painful than the idea of leaving himself bare - but he's not willing to go that far, not yet.
The blood on his skin makes the fabric stick uncomfortably. Every movement makes it cling different, prickling at his whiskers and pulling at the tender lines of ink that make up most of his abdomen by now, glued to his sides in disgustingly tacky red. He doesn't think he's ever felt so humiliated before in his life.
When the woman who stabbed the curse into his skin in the first place comes back, it just feels like the punchline to the overly long joke that's become his life.
He checks out through the bulk of the speech she makes the moment that he registers she's retreading the same treatment instructions that she gave to him. Nothing makes sense and everything is wrong. He stares at the brilliant red lines on his arms, his ears flattened to his head, and he barely registers it when whatever conversation Laios has with the tallman woman putters out.
His legs dangle entirely too far above the ground when Laios picks him up, but his complaints sound dull and useless, even to his ears. After tonight, he has very little in the way of dignity left to lean on. He and Laios both know that he won't be walking out of here, anyways. Not when trying to put weight on his feet makes them hurt so much he threatens to pass out.
Somehow, knowing that he'll have to submit to being carried for as long as this takes to heal makes him dread the coming days more than anything else.
His clothes, thankfully, are still intact. There's running water somewhere in the cranny of the dungeon they're in, but the tallman doesn't acknowledge it, simply directing them back the way they came. He doesn't want to stick around long enough for one of the resurrectionists he spots on the way out to get to his old "friend", anyways. At this point in the night, he's too burnt out on everything to bother getting blood out of multiple items of clothing.
Tallmen have a lot more gore in them than any reasonable creature should.
The lines on his palms burn with every bit of contact they make. He shouldn't be surprised that the ones up his back are the same. Laios carries his pack, and he's trapped between being grateful for it and hating his own lack of ability more than he hates nearly anything else that's happened since he woke up on a damn table.
There's a lot going on in his head. He struggles to work through the pain enough to make it make sense.
At some point between the arena and the campsite, he passes out.
Considering the circumstances, it shouldn't have been possible to hide it. Considering every prior encounter he'd had with Laios, he shouldn't have been capable of keeping it a secret for an hour, let alone a day, let alone the rest of his life-
But in the morning, Chilchuck wakes up in his bedroll, bandages wrapped around nearly every square inch of skin he has, to an elf fussing over his bedside, a plate of dry rations set just within his arm's length, and, though some unbelievable stroke of luck, no sign that they even know what happened on a single party member's face.
He's still alive. The world doesn't end. He hasn't been submitted to the canaries.
Somehow, that feels worse than if he had been sent off for dark magic.
At least, when Laios corners him to ask if he can tell Falin about his new condition, it feels more like normal than anything else in his life right now.
For all that means, anyways.
The tattoos spread over his back. There are rings inked into his skin, cuffs of ancient runes like shackles around his wrists and ankles, circles of runes on his heels that sting like the devil every time he sets a foot down just slightly too hard. He washes them every day that he can, unwilling to deal with either infection or whatever consequences that fucking with the magic in it might bring. He's lost enough weight from the initial spellcasting that he's not allowed to skip meals anymore, even if they buy his excuse that half-foots simply need to eat less. All of the padding over his ribs is simply gone, everything standing between him and his own organs thinned to near-nonexistence - he doesn't have enough body mass for a healing, let alone a resurrection, and it shows.
He looks like he's been starved halfway to death in the space of a single evening.
It's the least dramatic change in his body in the past forty-eight hours. It's the only change that his party's been able to see.
He's not sure he wants to know what they think of him. But he can't stay ignorant without blinding himself to nearly everything they do.
Marcille sneaks him extra rations, and Namari asks after hauling his bow, and Shuro makes pointed comments about how close they still are to the surface, and all he can think of is how frail they must see him, now that he's forced to rely on them for everything.
He hopes that they won't think less of him. He's not naive enough to really believe it.
Three weeks to fully heal, according to the arena tallman. At least a week before he can try walking on it, according to Falin. Laios asks if he wants to turn back now, but he refuses - they may be only a few days from the surface, but that's still a few days from the surface, on an expedition where their party still hasn't found anything of note - leaving now would just waste their progress and leave them all off worse for it.
They have the supplies they need to delve deeper. They just need to find the guts to do it.
Chilchuck might be dead weight, but he's less weight than if it happened to anyone else, and he, at least, can try to do his job even when he's stuck being carried.
Being stuck in a dungeon without working legs is a death sentence, but a dungeon has less people willing to question a mysterious injury, and his chances of being able to get by on the surface without someone poking too far into his cover are so small they might as well be nonexistent. Half-foots have only survived as long as they have through community, but there's no such thing as privacy in a half-foot den, and he fears the death he'll face at the hands of the Canaries more than he fears the death he'll face at the hands of the dungeon.
He doesn't mention the latter half of his reasoning. No one knows what's inked into his skin yet, not besides the Toudens. His party doesn't need to know how likely he is to wind up as one of the criminals who treat the dungeon as their home, and so he's not about to tell them. He still has eyes and ears and expertise, and they're all blind and deaf by his standards anyways. He can survive a week, as long as they can work like a proper troupe for seven days.
And if he dies, then it'll be quicker than old age.
Laios agrees to the plan surprisingly fast, for all the concern he's directed Chilchuck's way since the day in the arena. Suspiciously so, even. Falin's willingness to back his decision is, Chilchuck thinks, the only reason the other party members don't veto it on the spot - he's infirm and unstable right now, and as far as all of them are concerned, he might keel over at any minute. He's hardly dungeon-delving material right now, and all of them know it, but Falin is the most accomplished healer out of them, and most of the party has enough affection for her that they'll bend over backwards to fit her word.
The door they need to map is on the sixth floor, more than a month deep. If Chilchuck were at his best, he'd be able to shave weeks off that time. As he is now, all he can do is offer insight from above and pray that his party won't be stupid enough to get themselves killed anyways.
The decision goes through, and everyone looks at Laios like he's lost whatever few screws kept his head on previously, but they let the decision slide.
Objectively, it's a stupid choice to make. His party must think he's gone mad. Right now, Laios is the only thing standing between him and a lifetime behind elven bars, and he knows he should be grateful for him for listening to his pleas, but-
He doesn't voice the suspicions he has.
He knows the way that Laios looked at the fighters in that ring, even in passing. The love that the tallman has for monsters is so poorly-veiled it barely even counts as a secret - he's surprised it hasn't come up more often, now that he's part monster himself, but he's not blind enough to think that Laios's pet obsession doesn't have a part in this - he wants more time to examine the monstrous rabbit half stitched onto his bones, and he's so bad at hiding it he might as well not be trying at all.
He's... not sure how he feels about it.
He knows, already, that Laios is... odd. Strange. Out of place. His habits are an anomaly even among other tallmen. He can speak for hours upon hours on monsters that no one else would spare a second glance to, dedicating endless time and energy to fields of study so niche that Chilchuck could swear he's the only person he's ever seen show the slightest interest.
He's oblivious to social mores, more interested in rambling on about living armor or kelpies than the tired expressions of his peers. He's unable to go a single day without talking of some obscure beast from the depths of the dungeon, yammering about its biology with more enthusiasm than some people announce their engagements. He cares for the beasts more than he cares for his own teammates, Chilchuck thinks.
He understands monsters more than he does the people he interacts with every day of his life.
And now Chilchuck is one of those.
Chilchuck doesn't have much more to do than watch, while he's stuck being lugged around like a sack of flour. Laios notices... more, now. He's more attentive. More careful. When his carrying abrades more than usual, he readjusts at the slightest hint of discomfort, sometimes before Chilchuck notices himself - he doesn't realize how unnerving it is to not have his feet on a solid surface now until he spends an hour being hauled around by Namari and has to pull himself off halfway through. Walking makes the scabbing on his feet burn like fire, but it's easier to tolerate than the awful fear that rises in his chest with every second he spends with his legs dangling in the air.
He's picking up habits that he didn't have before, and they fit in so seamlessly that he barely even realizes until someone points it out.
Too much meat turns his stomach. He can hear better, whispers that he once could have tuned out now louder in his ears than even a normal conversation would. His heart beats faster than before, nearly two hundred and fifty beats in a minute - he worries, when he notices, that it'll give him away, and it only beats faster at the thought. He nearly forgets how little the other races can hear. It's only hours later that he puts real thought to how little it took to nearly drive him to a panic.
There's a stranger in his skin who isn't him, who isn't even human - something etched into him in bone-needle pricks and searing, boiling-oil agony - and he's the only one who knows that it's anything more than just a few odd habits.
He, and Laios.
And isn't it strange, to be sharing something so delicate with someone so indelicate?
Laios, he thinks, still probably knows more about his new monstrous biology than Chilchuck himself does. He can't say that his feelings on it are anything less than... mixed.
Chilchuck doesn't know much about artificial beastkin. It's forbidden to know about, illegal to even try and research - he's not stupid enough to go poking at things better left buried, much less to put himself in the line of fire for long-lived races who'll put him in jail for the rest of his natural life. Still, he's heard gossip.
He knows, if faintly, that the spell was created for the sake of enhancing soldiers. He doesn't remember where he first heard it - some bar somewhere, maybe, or an offhand comment from a former teammate - but the fact floats in the back of his mind when he thinks of it, faint and damning. He can see its echo in the spurs sprouting from his heels, in the leg muscle he's never worked to get, in the speed and acrobatics that come horribly naturally to him, in the thump of rabbit's legs against a neck-
The first thing that he ever did with this new form was take a man's head off. And all he can think of, when he looks back at it, is how easy it was to do it.
Chilchuck never would have gone anywhere near the arena, if he had a choice in the matter. He wouldn't have paid for the spell inked around his wrists, much less be put into an unknown amount of debt over it. He doesn't need a body made for fighting - he doesn't need a body so obviously inhuman, so easy to dismiss and dispose of. Half-foot tails are cropped for a reason - he doesn't need to be farther from the other races, doesn't need to be even more of an other.
Laios carries him from place to place, unfalteringly attentive to whims he didn't even know that he had as the soles of Chilchuck's feet heal from the tattoo needle. Laios tells him about monsters, and animals, and rabbits, more than he ever thought was possible to know. Laios... looks at the curse etched into his skin with a sort of longing that he doesn't know how to put words to.
He wonders, as he washes the still-healing ink by the river, if Laios wishes that he were the one with black magic forced under his skin.
Chilchuck isn't perfectly observant, not with people, but he knows how to interpret at least some of it. He might've been half-conscious at the area, but he's not blind enough to not see how Laios looked at those beastkin fighters, and he's not blind enough that he can't see the way that the tallman looks at his curse marks. It's a strange mix of emotions, something like flattery curled around something slimy and squirming in the pit of his stomach. He's got a spell etched into his body that'd get him thrown into an elven jail to rot for the rest of his life, and Laios...
Laios, he's beginning to think, would have wanted this body. Would have wanted to have someone stab a soldier's supplement written in a curse tongue into his shoulders. He cares for monsters more than humans, beast body language more than simple common - hell, Chilchuck's seen first-hand how massive of a gap there is between his common communication and whatever he has with monsters.
Laios is an actual combatant, the kind of person who signed up to swing a sword - sturdy enough to take a few knocks, chubby enough that transforming probably wouldn't make his stomach scream like it's trying to eat itself, knowledgeable enough that he wouldn't be struggling to figure out a whole new set of rules from first principles. Chilchuck has spent so long being himself that trying to adjust to a whole new body this late in life is being thrown into the deep end without a paddle - but Laios, he suspects, knows monsters' bodies better than he knows his own hands.
...if their positions were different, he thinks, then Laios would have handled this far, far easier than him. And he's not sure how to handle it, when Laios seems to envy him for a curse that was forced on him against his will.
Chilchuck is a locksmith. Chilchuck makes his living in traps. Chilchuck is a noncombatant, who has never really wanted to become a combatant, who was stuck with this body against his will, who'll have to scrounge up the money to pay for it, who has no need to behead a man in a single kick, no need to cut through flesh like butter, no need to leap with enough strength that he knocks Laios stumbling just from using his pauldrons as a kick-off.
The body he's been given is made for spectacle. For loss of humanity. For violence. It's modified for death, for flashy sprays of arterial blood in the coliseum. Rabbits don't have spurs on their feet, don't have a kick that decapitates - don't dent armor from lashing out on instinct, let alone have instinct to go for someone's neck when threatened. Rabbits don't have legs strong enough to break solid oak to pieces - half-foots might not keep them as livestock, but he's lived in mixed-race settlements for years, and Laios has been murmuring facts about them into the backs of his ears for nearly two weeks now-
Rabbits can break their own spines with the force of their kicks.
And he didn't know, before now, but he has to know now, because he might be the same way - and that makes it feel all the worse when he has to find it out from an offhand comment from Falin, because it's something that she knows that he doesn't, because it's another reminder of the landscape full of landmines he's struggling to navigate, because it's yet another thing that the Touden siblings seem to know like the back of their hands where he-
He doesn't know the slightest thing about this.
About what he is now. About what he's supposed to be. He doesn't know anything, and every time he speaks with them, it gets hammered in more and more. There's a gap of knowledge so wide that it might as well be unbridgeable between him and them, because there's half a world of difference between him and tallman farmers who've dedicated half their lives to farming an animal that he only knew by tangential proximity before it was stabbed into his soul.
And that's the problem, isn't it? His own shortcomings, in the face of people who feel so much younger than him, who he has to rely on for his own well-being. Who he has to lean on, if he wants to get anywhere, and who he's becoming more and more aware are more suited to bearing this sort of thing than Chilchuck ever has been.
This has never been a life that Chilchuck wants. If there isn't a way to break the chains shackling magic to his body, then he'll be stuck hiding parts of himself for life - either forced to hide the spell well enough to pretend it doesn't exist, or locked away in some elven prison somewhere until he forgets his own name. He doesn't want to be a monster, he doesn't want to be a tool, he doesn't want to give another excuse to treat him like he's disposable-
But Laios, he's beginning to think, would rather be a monster than human.
He can't claim to understand it. He's spent too long watching what people do to beast-men for that, too long watching how people act with anything they think they can mistreat - beast-men are a level below the rest of humanity, and he doesn't even want to think how something like him might rank. They're inhuman, illegal - he's seen half-foots taken away for as little as looking into the wrong books, he has no doubt that it would be worse if the elves caught wind of someone altering their body with magic. Who would want an enchantment that guarantees they'll need to spend their life hiding?
Laios would, apparently. And he hasn't the slightest idea how he's meant to handle that sort of want turned towards him, towards something he had no choice with.
He has the rest of this dive to avoid answering it. After that... he doesn't know.
The scabs, he knows, will heal eventually. Will set into his skin, like any other tattoo, probably settled to the same rusty red that the tallman who gave them to him had, if the way they've been healing is any indication, and then... well, he doesn't know.
He can't be seen with them by anyone, not if he wants to keep himself from going to jail for the rest of his short life. He can't ever take off his gloves in someone's company again, can't wear his hair short - the length it's grown out to now only barely hides the diamond-shaped rune that caps the array on his scalp, and it's a small miracle that no one's looked too close at the outsides of his ears yet. He can't hide these, not like he can hide anything else about this.
Paranoia's had him double-looping his cowl around his neck to hide the markings, and he's seen the other party members look twice at it, heard them absently discuss it even through the walls. His hearing's never been sharper, and they're far from oblivious - discussion of just what he's doing with the Touden siblings, discussion of what he's doing with Laios, makes up more dinner talk than he'd prefer under any circumstances.
He's not entirely sure what to make of the fact that something like half of the party appears to have jumped directly to the hare-brained idea that they've been having relations, even after Chilchuck set down the very clear base rule of no inter-party romance.
He's not sure if it's better or worse that the idea seems to be working to get them off his trail.
It'd be a decent cover, for someone else. Plausible, especially in parties with similar no-relationship clauses - when you're skirting the rules, you tend to dance around your other party members. But it's a wrong impression, directed to the one member of the party he's least likely to fall for - and worse, it makes him seem flaky and ingenuine, going back on his own rules the second he sees a pretty tallman. It stings to know they think so little of his self-control, and it stings more to know he can't say anything against it without incriminating himself in an entirely different way.
He hates the situation he's found himself in. He hates it with every ounce of his body, every bit of his breath - but he can't do anything about it, and that just makes it worse, if anything.
Maybe, at the end of this, he'll be able to go back to normal. He'll be able to cover up the tattoos crawling over his skin and brush off the allegations of a relationship with Laios. He'll be able to go home to the guild and make believe that he's fine even to a room with dozens of pairs of listening ears pricked for gossip. He'll be able to pretend nothing has changed.
But he won't be able to make things be the same.
There's a second body bound to his, made of muscle and bone and blades. There's a living weapon lurking just under his skin, waiting to be used, and he can't make it go away no matter how much he wants to - and that scares him, maybe even more than everything else does.
Because the rumors, no matter how bad for his career, are temporary. Because talk can be forgotten about, or fade into obscurity, or fail to take off the ground more than a handful of whispers. Because even if laws have been changed or forgiven before, if the laws around artificial beastkin were lifted today, he still wouldn't be able to be the same-
Because this, whatever it'll wind up meaning to him, is permanent. And it's that permanency, more than anything, that terrifies him.
He washes the tattoos. He rewraps the wounds. He returns to camp like nothing's ever changed, even though the rabbit's soul still itches under his skin.
He's been changed. He's not wholly human anymore. He'll never be the same again, and the proof of that is seeping into his very soul with every moment that passes, no matter how much he tries to dig his heels in. His body isn't wholly his own, and the only person who even knows is a freak who wouldn't understand social graces if they bit him on the ass, and-
Everything's different. And yet, almost nothing's changed.
A human weapon sits at a campfire. His party sits around him.
One more job. One more floor. Just one drawing of the runes on the door, then a return trip to the surface. Just a bit more time to let his wounds heal.
He won't be able to hide this forever. If things keep getting worse, then he probably won't be able to even keep it subtle for much longer.
But for now, he can play at normalcy, and given the givens, that's more than he ever expected to get.
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intoloopin-archive · 9 months ago
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♯ ° ؂ A LOOK INTO iNSYNC CITY: LOOPiN INDIVIDUAL FANDOMS RANKED FROM THE TAMEST TO THE WORSE.
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♯ ° 10 ؂ (🏆) DRUMPICKS / DRUMDANS (for HANJAE)
Recently named by Hanjae himself -- who was visibly emotional when he realized he had grown a big enough fanbase to demand distinction --, the title Drumpick comes from a mixture of 'drumsticks' and 'guitar picks', the two things multi instrumentalist Hanjae always carries with him. It's also the lovely abbreviation of 'the drummers picks'; as much as they have picked Hanjae, Hanjae, LOOPiN's designated drummer by sport, has picked them as well. In their vast majority Drumdans, as they often go by online, seek almost no trouble and cause no harm in iNSYNC spaces, since Hanjae has next to none anti sentiment in fandom; to everyone these days, is undeniable that his talent in dancing, rapping, acting and even producing at times makes him a precious hidden threat.
The biggest bickering happens amongst Drumpicks themselves, with fans of Hanjae, the Idol and Hanjae, the Actor, constantly disagreeing on who truly supports Hanjae the most -- with his recent acting fanbase being quite loud about their beliefs of being stronger Drumdans.
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♯ ° 09 ؂ (☁️) ELMOS (for DYLAN)
To first explain why Elmos was Chihoon's name of choice, is necessary to explain that Dylan has been on a running gag with Sesame Street characters since his debut, specially Big Bird, who was his Halloween costume for The Loop Halloween Party of 2019, his icon on every single social media, and the most referenced character by him out of any piece of media -- even in songs. Naturally, the Chihoon enthusiastics got in on the joke too and started to deem themselves 'Elmos', which to him was hilarious. From then on, they got his blessing to consider that the name of his personal fandom, to the point yellow and red are now often associated with his solo stans.
As it's easy to assume, Dylan is the members who takes his solo fanbase the least seriously, running under the assumption that every LOOPiN fan with him as a bias is in on the joke too. He much rather prefers to acknowledge everyone as an iNSYNC, even if they tell him they're only rooting for him -- which is something some chronically online Elmos can get pretty defensive and dragged about by OT10 stans.
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♯ ° 08 ؂ (🌻) SONGSYNCS (for TAESONG)
Songsyncs, an abbreviation for 'iNSYNCs for Taesong', is the only fandom that still keeps the oldschool LOOPiN stan nomenclature the solo fandoms used to adopt back in their early years; and now that Taesong has started to recognize and address them as such, they don't feel a need to change. Taesong attracts fans much like himself, meaning that to outsiders or baby iNSYNCs they can appear to be much calmer then they actually are.
But if you go deeper into the Songsync rabbit hole, you'll see they get extremely protective of Taesong over anything, and even have a code of their own for shading other members and their fanbases; although you will very rarely find them starting a fight, you for sure will see them quietly liking and vague tweeting about any iNSYNC drama, no exceptions.
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♯ ° 07 ؂ (🦎) GYUGENIES (for GYUJIN)
Coming into the group years after debut, one of the first questions Gyujin ever got on fan meetings was what should his fans be called -- a heated topic at the time given his polemic addition to LOOPiN, two mere weeks after Beomseok's official departure, that parted the fanbase into his supporters and people who were not thrilled to have him around. He almost immediately picked Gyugenies, 'Gyujin's genies', as they are the people who made his wish of debuting come true. To many, it's by now a consensus that they have become the funniest and most entertaining sub fandom.
On their downside, Gyugenies sometimes have an exclusionist tendency towards some of the members or full group activities -- that sort of 'Gyujin is the only reason LOOPiN finally looked interesting to me, anyway' or 'All the others have too many fans already, let's just focus on him' mentality that OT10s don't appreciate, and has spread a littleto even iNSYNCs with a Gyujin ult or bias. It's clear that if Gyujin isn't involved, don't even bother trying to recuit them for anything regarding LOOPiN; they won't tune in, and won't hesitate to bringing up how long it took for groups fans to like him either.
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♯ ° 06 ؂ (🎧) AMWOOS (for MINWOO)
Taking direct inspirations from Minwoo's producer allias BANGMFM, AMWoos -- pronounced A-M-Woos, like the radio frequency that came before FM and served as its base -- have had their bloodthirsty days; if the ranking took place back in 2020 or 2021, they would have been on the Top3 at the very least. But ever since Minwoo stepped up from honorary leader back when Taesong went on his 2021 hiatus, to official leader in 2022 and onwards, the fanbase has in its majority calmed down; although their air of superiority still remains, and it runs strong.
AMWoos have made a point loud and clear from their early days that they believe Minwoo is in a whole lane above any other LOOPiN member, and Minwoo's lack of recognition of them by name isn't even drag worthy to them; on the contrary, they think Minwoo's fanservice towards iNSYNCs, something so unnatural of him, is way less sincere than the quiet appreciation they receive by him in clues. The fandom operates much more quietly these days and, seeming to have fought all fights already years back, are left alone by anyone who's smart enough to not poke the beehive.
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♯ ° 05 ؂ (🦔) HOJEOGONS (for HAEGON)
Placed right in the middle comes Hojeogons, Haegon's solo stans and the most 'sink or swim' out of them all; they're either the calmest or the most intense, no in-between. The Hojeo in their name comes from the romanization of the korean word for 'porcupine', Haegon's representative emoji and favorite animal, while the 'gon' is obviously taken from his name -- less obviously from the romanization of 'bear', which correlates to past LOOPiN member Beomseok's old fandom name, Gonbeoklies, as both used to be considered a package deal.
Haegon is an open and emotional book in all senses, which tends to get him in hot waters, and Hojeogons are always the first in line to defend him from being misunderstood. Their growing eagerness to see the youngest of the team interact with Idols other than his bandmates has been a currently sensitive topic, specially after Beomseok left LOOPiN; Beomseok as a whole is a whole can of worm's for Hojeogons, who have grown to pretend he never existed as they understand that's what Haegon would want, something older iNSYNCs find absurd to even consider.
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♯ ° 04 ؂ (💎) RARERUKIS (for HARUKI)
Rarerukis, much like AMWoos, have been much bigger menaces in the past -- namely the period in which Haruki began his modeling career and fell into the good graces of Knets back in 2020, when they braced his merits as if they were their own and won the animosity of iNSYNCs with their big ego --, but they're still very much loud. Taking Haruki's diamond stan emoji extremely seriously, they know they have found a rare jewel to stan in him; the 'ruki' being often spoken as 'ruby', the crystal that has one of Haruki's favorite color.
With Haruki taking a quieter, less commercial approach to his career, as well as his more constant reminders of how much he enjoys unity and dislikes any of his bandmates exclusionists, has began a quiet change in Rarerukis pattern of behavior; after all, if there is one thing that's true to them almost universally, is the want to not cause him trouble or tarnish his fleeting reputation. Still, don't you dare say any other member is an IT Boy of any sort -- unless you want to see multiple 'Haruki Being The Ultimate Face Of LOOPiN' threads to invade your timeline for two days, at the very least.
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♯ ° 03 ؂ (🤓) WIZZARDOS / WIZZARS (for O.Z)
Given his stage name, the connection drawn between O.z and The Wizard Of Oz was inevitable and surprisingly well received by Zhiming himself, who's added the 🧙‍♂️ emoji to his online sign-offs. Wizzardos are the first ones that come to mind when iNSYNCs think of a pretentious crowd. Good luck trying to express even the tiniest criticism of Zhiming's music or Idol demeanor to a Wizzar -- even the pacifist ones won't let it slide without a lecture. Since O.z also works outside of LOOPiN in a duo with soloist sensation NICO, his fanbase is almost a perfect half and half of iNSYNCS and people with no real interest in the group, a mix that tends to attract tension. They're also credit for popularizing calling LOOPiN stans Insects in petty fanwars.
But even the most hardcore iNSYNCS recognize they are the easiest of the solo fandoms to join, given O.z's polarizing history and the old jokes that are still being made about and towards him even by a percentage of OT10s -- to the point that any vocal Zhiming ult is often presumed to be an Wizzar akgae or at least an akgae sympathizer (because most truly are.) They're also regarded as the easiest people to offend and hardest ones to please.
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♯ ° 02 ؂ (🗣️) SOOSOULS / SONNYSIDES (for SEUNGSOO)
Seungsoo has a quite notorious solo fanbase, with a reputation that grows more intense by the year. They're in between names at the moment, with many Soosouls, as they've been deemed since 2019, growing pretty found of Sonnysides, named after Seungsoo's recently updated producer tag, NASONNY. On a study on their crazy loyalty and how hard they regard and promote him as a person and an artist, most point Seungsoo's tendency to 'vent' to fans too openly as the main reason for the parasocial relationships between him and Soosouls growing a little out of control, as they take it as 'fresh' and 'real'.
What iNSYNCs agree is the factor that keeps them at bay and prevents them from being crowned the most annoying bunch of LOOPiN solo stans you can find these days, is how Seungsoo has most times eventually come forward to tell them to cut their antics out when they go overboard; be it by asking them to not trend tags pushing him to go solo or to not pick fights with other people over his 'deserved group positions'. He's clearly not a fan of the Soopremacist corner of his stans, as most call them, but doesn't seem too displeased to have an army ready to defend him.
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♯ ° 01 ؂ (🌟) J.J.B.BS (for J.J)
To be a J.J.B.B -- J.J's Babies and Besties, as he baptized them himself in a fancall that's now considered both iconic and cursed LOOPiN media --, tick skin has been a must from day one; after all, Jiahang debuted with the 'filler' title firmly attached to him from LOOPiN's first ever stage. They were the very first solo fandom to be acknowledge, with Jiahang pushing the name himself early in his debut day and onwards as something private, a practice that was frowned upon and backlashed by iNSYNCs strongly, and only helped push the 'it's us against the world' mentality that keeps J.J.B.Bs so united and focused on J.J alone, no exceptions.
As a point of merit, you really can't find a more tight run ship: from the chinese bars to international fans, J.J.B.Bs are regarded as 'the final bosses' of individual events and stream parties, and won't ever let anything involving Jiahang fail. Calling yourself a J.J.B.B in the first place is already admitting you're not too far from being an only stan. The most extreme side of his fandom has been not so kindly nicknamed by iNSYNCs as BBitches, and are in a way or another always at the center of the hurricanes -- provoking other fandoms, making fun of other members and overall being the most frustrating people to encounter when they're on Xu Jiahang defense mode, which is next to always.
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phantoms-lair · 1 year ago
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FNAF Conan thing Part 1
Take the basic premise of Security Breech. Freddy Fazbear's Pizzaplex opens up. People start going missing. Add two addendums. 1) This takes place in Beika and 2) the Pizzaplex is smaller, with only one star animatronic, Freddy. The Shounen Tantei get involved when a classmate hires them to look into the disappearance of a friend who was going to sneak into the Pizzaplex. The kids go to investigate and are quickly distracted by the Pizzaplex itself. Conan digs enough to find out there is something very wrong here. He calls Agasa to pick up the kids, but asks him to have something in the car that would take up an entire seat - an excuse for the kids to leave without him, on the understanding that Agasa will pick him up after they're dropped off. That is very much not the plan. Conan starts sneaking around, and while in the maintenance room, hides in Freddy's stomach hatch. This leads to him meeting Freddy the same way Gregory does in the game. Freddy agrees to help him, and together they discover the owner of this particular franchise is dressing up like a rabbit mascot to kidnap children who either enter unattended or to lure children inside for him to take. And along the way Conan realizes Freddy's too...aware to be just a robot. When he has an existential crisis about identity from seeing some endo skeletons Conan comes to the conclusion that Freddy is basically an awakened AI who hasn't quite realized that fact.
They find the children still alive, but in rough shape. Freddy is in the process of freeing them when he hears someone coming. He instinctively shoves Conan inside his cake storage unit. It's the owner. Freddy confronts him about the children and the condition they were in. The manager states that 'their suffering was ripe enough to be harvested' and tries to shut Freddy down. Freddy resists, knocking him out. Freddy and Conan get the kids out of there and call the police. Conan asks what will happen to Freddy and Freddy says if he's not taken in as evidence he will probably have his memory wiped and installed at a different location. And at this point Conan can't let that happen. As an emergent AI he's aware. And letting him get wiped feels like killing him. Freddy points out that without the Fazbear recharge stations he'll run out of power, but Conan says that it's okay - he knows a guy. Conan convinces the other kids involved to hide that Freddy was there so he won't get taken away, Knowing Freddy saved then, they eagerly agree. Police and medical crews come to pick up the kids. But when the police try to enter the Pizzaplex it explodes. No one was hurt, aside from the owner still inside. Agasa is used to Shinichi pulling shenanigans on him, but trying to hide and retrofit a theme restaurant animatronic is a bit of an odd task, even for him. But as he talks with Freddy he, like Conan, realizes the animatronic is truly sapient. He can easily fix the power source issue, but not so much making it so Freddy can walk around in public. But it's okay - he knows a guy. A little while later the Mouri's are introduced to Conan's father - Edogawa Fred. Fred is much taller and more built than and average person. But because they're not springing this on Conan it goes a lot better than Fumiyo's introduction - with Conan actually recognizing his 'father' and being happy to see him. (Unplanned for, but this starts a train of thought about how Conan acts around each of his parents, it's a marked difference) Fred explains to Kogoro that the reason he hasn't been around was two fold. The first was that he was a lot more injured in the accident than Fumiyo and required more surgery and physical therapy and the second was at the time of the accident he and Fumiyo had been at the start of a very bitter divorce, and had made the joint decision to leave Conan where he was safe and wouldn't have to witness it or worry about being caught in the middle. ((This actually wins Kogoro over. He saw what the separation between him and his wife did to Ran, and can't blame this man for trying to spare his son that.) So Edogawa Fred (or Fredogawa as he becomes known) stays around. He gets a job as a performer and manages to afford a small apartment for himself. Conan still stays with the Mouri's but Fred is playing the role of Dad to a hilt and makes sure he's always available to Conan, sometimes picking him up at school or taking him and the other kids on outings. Now the Kudo's were informed someone needed a new identity and would be playing the role of Conan's father. That's fine. What they didn't expect was the person to stick around and act like a father any more than Fumiyo acted like a mother. So now they're curious and want to meet this person. They arrange a flight for the two (private to get around the passport issue) but the plane encounters problems and has to land in California. It's going to take a few days to repair, so Conan and Freddy decide to find something to occupy their time. It turns out this town has it's very own PizzaPlex, with an even bigger cast. So why not check it out? Freddy is curious about what his life would have been like if his manager had not been an insane killer. And really, it's not like such a thing could happen twice?
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berlinini · 1 year ago
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some Thoughts about the 02 show (while the days of ltwt show recaps the length of essays are gone, I thought I'd share some stuff)(this of course got kinda long anyways, I am nothing but predictable!)
first of all it's so interesting to go online after a show and "consume" the show through different perspectives... I was in the pit close to the sound booth and could see a tiny Louis like tunnel vision (and not even always - I had to look at the screens a lot more than any previous shows). I had never been to such a big venue and it felt like the arenas I'd be previously - it's so hard to gage. Anyways when I saw Louis' IG post I realized how far I was and seeing pictures and videos of the venue - I truly hadn't realized the sheer number of people. Also the lights project from our POV seemed to have bombed but seeing the videos, it did create the intended effect. Also I was so far that I had to ask the gc for the color of the pants (#purple #slay) and only in the encore, when there was a camera on Louis' entire body, did I notice the shoes (unfortunately my eyes deceived me into thinking they were Nike). I missed all the little quirky faces and interactions that I now see in gifs. HOWEVER I did not miss the several times Louis teared up including during Chicago and during his speeches and I tell you my heart was bursting. I love that he talked a bit more than usual - I think he said something like "I can't put into words... well let me try" and he said everything so perfectly! The reference to his dreams and the "we" - I just listened to him and thought how much I love him. His special thanks to his band was super sweet.
setlist: HOTH safe! If I hadn't known DMD was back on the setlist I wouldn't have recognized it. No 7 :( I tolerate Angels Fly but tbh I don't understand how it's there and not like Headline or Always You or FEARLESS. High in Cali was hilarious because you could tell weed isn't legal in the UK lmao - the vibe was so different than back home. 505 still so good and now I can sing every single lyrics but in a very oh poor me, the show ruined my 5 x 505 streak this year since it's now 6. But 505 Laval you'll always be #1 in my Heart <3. We Made It is still the It Girl and Silver Tongues... I doubt a closer will ever come this close (hehe) to how fucking epic it is. Tbh I could hardly tell when the string section was playing but I'm glad I had a show with strings! Me still in LTWT mode wondering why the pyro didn't go off during Walls only to be told there hasn't been any for this tour ouuuups. The Megamix SLAYS so hard and the special effects were SO cool! I did miss the classic rainbow lights for SIBWAWC cuz the lasers didn't reflect on the crowd as nicely but the clouds and at the beginning of ATT were beautiful.
Talking about lasers I was eyeing this guy in the soundbooth that I'd never see before and was clowning about him being there for the LIVE ALBUM RECORDING. I even took notes to figure out later where he works (spare a thought for tumblr user bbrox who has to put up with my insanity). ONLY to figure out 1 hour later that the guy was the special lasers guy as made so obvious by the fact he packed up his stuff after Saturdays in a box that said "laser fx triangle C" lololol. Sometimes I think it's good to clown for nothing - be humbled!
I saw most of the crew in the soundbooth - the person I was with was trying to spot the Tomlinsons while I was looking for Oli and K and was mentally putting a check on names for the sound and lights guys - priorities! (Blaming Red Rocks for having us go down the rabbit hole of every single member of the crew)
Oh yeah the KMM lights! It was kinda spontaneous? He had a little shy smile like he was telling himself 'look at this lot' and it was soooo adorable. I'm glad I got to be a part of it <3 Which pretty much summarizes this whole show - witnessing a moment in history.
Finally - TANK TOP LOUIS WITH MY OWN 2 EYES!!!!!! And what a tank top!!! #blessed #cantspellslutwithoutlt
Everyone's been saying being a louie is for life and that just keep getting stronger and stronger everytime I get to see him perform! Can't wait for future shows!!!
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macaroon-sapling · 1 year ago
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Headcanons - Glitchtrap ✷
What a silly rabbit! Have some thoughts on William Afton's latest and certainly not greatest form of supposedly "living forever".
☆☆☆
❋ Glitchtrap is first and foremost, a ghost. He may be taking the form of an annoying little computer virus, but this is still William Afton in the non-flesh. He has the ability to jump between electrical currents with relative ease, giving him access to all sorts of screens and wires. His favourite digital spots to hang out are various security cameras in the Pizzaplex, and most of all, Vanessa's home PC.
❋ As a ghost, Glitchtrap's anatomy is very unique. He could technically take the form of whatever he wants to look like, but of course he chose what appears to be a very personalized version of Springbonnie. He has fabric for skin with a hand-stitched kitschy appearance, complete with plasticky eyes, nose, teeth, and whiskers. The polyester faux fur fabric conceals cotton-white plush innards. Glitchtrap still has organs of course too, but they're suspended in cotton and poly-fil rather than the good old blood and tissue.
❋ By the time that Glitchtrap exists, he is a shell of a man. A pathetic excuse of a representation of William Afton. In fact, he barely truly remembers who he used to be. Strongly affected by a form of post-traumatic amnesia, he only remembers selective details about his life. He remembers the most about his kids, his goals and aspirations, his talents, and particularly his past business partner, Henry. His warped memory only kept things that were deemed "important", naturally. He fantasizes about Henry frequently still, daydreaming about a romanticized version of his past with him, even remembering some events that didn't actually happen. Subconsciously, part of him believes they'll be reunited again somehow someway. Ignorance of reality is to blame for that belief.
❋ This form of existence has, for lack of any better words, royally fucked up his sense of personality as well. Most of the time he acts like a bastardized version of his past stage personality of Springbonnie. This manifests as him being overly childish, stubborn, careless, apathetic, selfish, manic, and reactive. Glitchtrap prefers not to think about such things, and acts without thinking most of the time. He is very much aware of who he is, William Afton, but in the way that he might do a double-take if addressed by that name for the first time in a while. He is still just as murderous, dramatic, and cunning as he once was as well, encouraging Vanessa to carry out his vague "legacy" for him since he is largely unable to do so as a ghostly computer virus. He does have the ability to possess her as well, but is simply too lazy and prefers to watch her willfully do his bidding.
❋ Glitchtrap struggles with his sense of identity. This has carried over from his time spent as Springtrap, and his dissociation of self has only gotten worse. The contrast between Glitchtrap and William is vast and unnerving. He believes himself to be better than he's ever been, and worse at the same time. If he were to look in the mirror and see his past human face, he would not fully recognize it as himself any longer.
❋ In one way, Glitchtrap could look in a mirror and see himself. His real self. Due to some innate retained sense of humanity, his virus form's head can be ripped off and removed to reveal a shadowy and glitchy form. Underneath the rabbit's face, lies the broken visage of a human. Behind glossy purple eyes, there will forever be silver-blue ones. No facial features can be visibly discerned besides those haunting, iconic eyes now surrounded in black or white shadow. Perhaps it is better for this silhouetted version of the self to be hidden, since seeing its existence greatly distresses Glitchtrap. He pretends it doesn't exist, but why would it exist if he didn't secretly wish for it to still be there? He controls his own ghost's appearance, after all. Part of him craves humanity.
❋ And through all of this dissociation and amnesia, there are infrequent short periods of lucidity. A precious few hours when this miserable ghost is more William than Glitchtrap. It's horrifying. Distressing. Agonizing. He doesn't know where he is. He screams for help, no one answers. Vanessa is no help to him, he refuses to speak to her when he's like this. She keeps her distance. William despises who he's become, filled with self pity. He cries and thinks to himself that it isn't fair that he should have to live like this. Oh, but isn't it fair? Isn't it justified? Shouldn't a murderer such as himself have to live in the very same life that he condemned others to? A ghost in a machine. Trapped. It's rather fitting, I think. Glitchtrap is indifferent, he quite likes his life in a poor woman's desktop computer. William disagrees.
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good-beanswrites · 6 months ago
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I was looking at your headcanon post again.
#very personal hc but i think yuno stayed outside fuutas cell the first time to talk him down from panic
Would you mind writing a drabble on that?
Okay so uuuuhhhh this one got really long because as I said it was a personal idea I'd toyed around with a lot 😅 It's an outdated headcanon since I was thinking about the restraints in the pv shots being put into place post-T1, but I still wrote everything out as I originally pictured. (I'll never add it to Thermoregulation because it's not accurate, but this is the exact dynamic I was going for between them ;-;)
Fuuta had a lot of nightmares since coming to Milgram. It was bad enough when he was ripped away from his life after a traumatic (but accidental) incident, and had only gotten worse after verdicts were announced and he was plagued by cruel voices in his head. To no one’s surprise, the night that the first trial officially concluded, he was dreaming about death. 
He was at the funeral of a young girl. He tried everything in his power to leave without disrupting the service. He cut through the crowd, ducked his head and shuffled out of the way, but everywhere he turned, he would end up in front of the coffin once more. It was about to be lowered into the ground. The lid suddenly lifted. The girl herself leaned out, grabbing Fuuta by his throat. 
“It should have been you.” 
No one said it, but the sound rang in his ears as he was pulled into the coffin. The girl disappeared, and suddenly it was just him in the darkness, flat on his back, being lowered into the ground. He could still feel her hands around his neck. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t move. The walls were closing in on him. He cried out, startling himself awake. 
But he was still flat on his back. He was still in darkness. He still couldn’t move. He could still feel the girl’s squeezing around his throat.
His stomach flipped. He tried to sit up with no success. He didn’t know where he was or if anyone would even hear him, but that did nothing to dissuade him from raising his voice as loud as possible to cry for help. For every shout he got out, another was choked by the hands trying to kill him.
His voice was soon met with another.
“Hey, hey! I’m here! I’m right here!”
Its familiarity brought Fuuta back to reality. It didn’t lessen his panic, but he was relieved to know he wasn’t currently six feet under. 
“Yuno! You gotta get me outta here! I’m – I –”
“You’re okay, Fuuta. It’s alright.” There was a gentle rattle on the bars from where she was locked outside. The sound, too, managed to ground him to his position within the cell. He still couldn’t see a thing, but it helped knowing where he was.
He stuttered a few more words through shallow breaths. As much as he jerked his body around, it was held firmly in place. With reality settling in around him, he was able to recognize prison restraints (heavier than the ones he’d grown accustomed to on his uniform) and a blindfold as the root of his situation. It hadn’t been the girl’s fingers around his throat – just another one of the restraints. 
Images from his nightmare were quickly replaced by unsavory movie tropes. He pictured the poor saps that were strapped down to the mad scientist’s table or locked into a military’s torture seat. He was dizzy with panic.
“Breathe, Fuuta! I mean it, you’re okay. I’m right here. You’re not in any danger. Breathe.”
He didn’t. His chest was going to explode with the rate of his heartbeat. 
There came the sound of others murmuring. Fuuta craned his head in their direction, but it did him no good. 
Yuno went on, “it sounds like it happened to the others who were unforgiven, too. Everyone’s safe. This must be the punishment they talked about… But Es did say that there’d be no physical punishment, right? So I think you’ll be safe.”
“L-like I’m gonna trust them!” He let out a rant threatening Es, the prison, and that stupid rabbit. Yuno stayed quiet as he tugged on the belts, cursing his friends for getting him here. He cursed society for letting this happen. It was only when he started cursing himself that Yuno stopped him.
“Take a breath, Fuuta. You’re gonna be okay.” 
“Yuno!” It sounded like Shidou calling her. “She’s asking for you.” 
“Listen, I’m going to check on Mahiru, and I’ll be right back, alright?”
“W-what?”
“I’m coming right back, I promise.”
He felt a wave of nausea at the thought of being left alone. But he also hated the way she’d reassured him, like he was some little kid that needed babying. 
“Whatever. I’m not scared,” he said, even though they could both tell what a lie it was. “Just pissed. This is fucked up.”
“I’ll be back…”
Darkness closed in on him as soon as she left. The distant sounds of the others wasn’t reassuring. He hated not knowing what was going on around him. What if Milgram did have more dangerous plans in store? He’d never see it coming. He gave a few more tugs at the restraints, his adrenaline convincing him he stood a chance against them. 
He was sure Mahiru had a ton of prisoners fawning over her safety – why didn’t he have anyone? 
“I don’t deserve this!” He said to no one in particular. He’d never admit it was meant to convince himself. “Who do they think they are? Who…” do they think I am? The answer was very clear. They thought he was a killer. Him! The guy who couldn’t speak up in lecture hall and had never raised a hand to anyone in his life. Somehow, they saw him as someone to be held down like a wild animal. Someone violent. Deadly. Someone to lock up and throw away the key.
Which brought his thoughts to a new fear. How long would this be? What if the door never unlocked? What if he was trapped in perpetual darkness forever? Didn’t solitary confinement make people lose their minds? What if he went crazy here, deprived of senses and movement?
His breathing had just started to grow uncontrollable again when footsteps approached.
“It’s me.” He exhaled at Yuno’s reappearance. “The others are as okay as they can be.”
“What the fuck. I mean what the fuck.” He didn’t realize how loud he’d been yelling, but his voice was hoarse from it now. His mind was still spinning, his blood still pounding in his ears. “This is inhumane! It’s a violation of…” He sucked in a few more breaths. He could feel the blindfold dampen, and prayed Yuno didn’t notice the tears. “It’s…”
“I know, Fuuta. I know. You don’t need to worry.” Yuno was calm. Not a single tremble to her words. Fuuta didn’t know how she did it. He wanted to continue hating the coaxing sound of her voice. “Just try to relax. I’ll stay with you the whole time.” 
If you don’t go running off to Mahiru again. The thought was bitter and selfish, he knew. But he couldn’t bear one more moment of that suffocating isolation.
To make up for it, he muttered, “how are the others?”
“Hah…” It sounded like Yuno was settling down against the door. “Mikoto was really upset at first, but he’s quieted down now. He seems… different. Amane says she doesn’t mind praying to pass the time. Shidou is staying to keep Mahiru company.”
He grunted, but had nothing more to say. What does someone even say in this position? Even as the panic started to subside, he found only shame in its place. What kind of hero of justice was he? What kind of hero had to be restrained like this for what they’d done? What kind was seen in such a mortifying state in the first place? What kind actually did appreciate the gentle reassurance from someone younger and likely just as scared as him?
“Yuno…” His own voice shook terribly. 
“Hey –” And all the sudden, she was doing that thing where she sounded effortlessly shallow. “Did I ever tell you about the time I accidentally stole some lady’s dog?”
“Eh?” He reeled at the sudden switch.
“Oh, it was so awful,” she giggled. 
Fuuta was in no giggling mood. He tried to get control over his teary voice to ask, “how on earth do you do that by accident…?”
Yuno began her story. It was something ridiculous and likely embellished, but she was a good storyteller. Before he knew it, Fuuta’s heart rate had returned to something somewhat normal. 
She asked him some questions in between more wild tales. He thought they’d already shared everything there was to talk about during the first trial, but Yuno kept coming up with new stories to tell. He almost accused her of making shit up just to keep the conversation going. Almost. He scoffed at her latest comment about a bizarre encounter on the subway.
They talked for hours. His pulse would pick up any time he started dozing off, imagining the possibilities of what could happen if he were to sleep, or if Yuno would leave. He was glad she was taking over the conversation – his fear and exhaustion would have made him the absolute worst company. 
Yuno still stayed. 
Unlike him, she never once let on how tired she was. When asked, she simply replied, “you’re not the first man to doubt if I’ll keep it up all night.” He was too busy fumbling with a response, and she continued her story.
If he laid back and didn’t struggle, it could have felt like they were just normal friends, chatting in the dark before bed. He wouldn’t go so far to say it was nice by any means. It did distract him from his gut-wrenching panic, so he’d take it.
The two were going at it in a debate about music tastes when the morning bell blared. He heard the latch of the door unlock a split second before Yuno was throwing it open. 
“Hang on a sec, I’ve got you…!”
He blinked in the sudden light as she removed the blindfold. Yuno worked quickly to undo the other restraints. She pulled him to his feet. 
Fuuta stumbled a bit – shaky after a night of futile fighting. He shook out his muscles, careful not to fall. His hand rubbed around his neck now that he could finally breathe easy. 
“I bet you’re pretty sore, huh? We’ll have to hold a stretching session this morning! I used to do that all the time. Hm, I think Mahiru said she knew a bit of yoga~” Yuno was in the middle of mimicking a pose when Fuuta crashed into her with a hug. “... ah.”
 “Thank you.”
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edbloves · 4 months ago
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Gale is awake in the middle of the night thinking and spiralling and trying make mental tallies of all the things he has to do and learn and help her with and holy shit he's so unprepared and what are they going to do with a child, let alone a girl??
Also I’m curious about this! Are there specific moments where they feel underprepared to raise a girl?? Which one of them do you think adapts to that aspect of things more quickly??
ouuuuu love this question!!! this ask kinda revolves around the whole concept of raising her from a child into a fully functioning person, so it's a bit extensive!
I definitely think there are moments that they really worry over Grace because she's a girl, where they wouldn't necessarily if she was a boy. At first it mostly revolves around basic stuff like, holy smokes, how the hell are we supposed to handle her hair? and what do little girls wear with dresses? and god, buck, I don't know how the first thing about what little girls like, do you?
These are all easily solvable problems through which they find answers by talking to Marge. Once the "superficial" worries are solved, they start to realize the magnitude of what raising a girl will entail, and Bucky tends to spiral over that the most initially as well as through the years, worrying about making the wrong decisions or accidentally driving his little girl away:
boys, they understand, since they were both little boys themselves - girls, not so much. they're nervous about all the things that they don't even know to ask
as she gets older, they have to make decisions about schooling: all-girls school or not? finishing school or not?
John panics about puberty, remembers his sisters at the time, the emotions running high, the ups and downs, the first period, and doesn't know how on earth he will handle that
there's also the dreaded boy situation, and that is probably what worries both men the most, because all they can think about is all the boys they knew at her age, and how they acted and thought, and they know that it would be so easy for her to end up in an unwanted situation (particularly in the late 1950s/early 1960s where she would be a teenager). they don't want to helicopter parent her because they trust her and they want her to trust them, but they struggling knowing that anything could happen that would be out of her control
John sends himself into a tizzy thinking about a boy breaking up with her, angry at a future non-existent boy for breaking her future heart when he thinks about it, so he has to actively avoid the topic in his head
instead, they just try to be very present and understanding with her, with the end goal that she knows she's allowed to come to them at any time for anything at all and she won't be in trouble, especially if she needs help
The other thing that I would come with raising a girl would be that they would start to recognize how oppressed women were in the 40's and onwards and not want that for Grace. And that's not to say that they were ignorant of it, but as men there are some things that wouldn't have even crossed their peripheral thoughts until it's put in the context of Grace. For example:
Grace coming home from school one day in tears because someone told her girls weren't allowed to be astronauts (despite her and Gale discussing the stars on a regular basis)
Or the boys get to go outside and play kickball while the girls have to sit inside in the classroom and listen to the merits of being a good housewife
The distinct lack of sex education for women would be a tough one for them too
When they start to realize just how profoundly women's rights differ, Gale get's upset and goes down a rabbit hole realizing just how much he was unaware of
They end up always reinforcing to Grace that she can do whatever she puts her mind to, and they will help her knock down the walls that she needs to. While she's still a child, John and Gale go willingly into the school to pick fights with administrators with outdated ideas, and as she gets older, they teach her to stand up for herself and get better at supporting her proudly from the sidelines.
Thanks for the thoughtful ask Anon <3
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box-architecture · 8 months ago
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In the Forensic Anthropologist AU, what happened to Dream? Why does he have lots of scars and a cane? What happened? 
How do all of their coworkers react to finding out SamDream are dating?
…is there a Punz?
-
Dream had a split in his lip, a small scar from the accident he didn't talk about. Sam thought about it sometimes. He thought about how it stretched a little when Dream laughed, how it had the slightest texture when Dream let him cup his cheek.
It was a passing thought now, with Dreams lips wrapped around his cock. How pretty he must look, scars and all, and how Sam could only appreciate how he looked from this angle, looking down.
A mirror. Sam should get a mirror.
-
Schlatts business on paper is pretty typical capitalism. Off paper its pretty typical "assassinate anyone who tries to get in our way."
Quackity was working for Schlatt as the person who did the killings, so Schlatt wouldn't have to do the actual work and could focus on the business. Quackity has a normal, great life with his two partners who he's going to get married to. And Sapnap has always liked to talk about how cool his friends are, and sometimes they even all meet up for dinner, so Dream and Quackity are acquainted and friendly.
And then one of the bodies get discovered, poker chip in their mouth, tying back to Schlatt and Quackity, and suddenly he's a suspect and it's Not Looking Good.
And of course this means that Quackity is straining under Dream's calculating gaze, enough to try to complain to Sapnap, who gives Dream a hard time about it, because Obviously Quackity couldn't do those things, we know him.
And there's ice in Dream's veins as he digs further and further into the rabbit hole and thinks about how Quackity sleeps in Sapnaps bed, how Sapnap could be in danger.
So of course he urges Sapnap to think and look at the facts, and of course Sapnap takes that personally and goes to George, who has been trying to get Dream to stop focusing so much on his work for months. George seeing this as Dream pulling away from them and shredding all of Dream's case files he can get his hands on, and when Dream gets mad he can only yell about how dumb Dream is being to care more about his stupid work than them and their needs. And Dream packs his shit and stays at the lab, working tirelessly until he solves the case, trying to put it all out of his mind.
He's too close to unraveling their operation, so Schlatt has Quackity go after Dream. Dream has most of what happened buried in his mind as deeply as he can, but he does remember the taste of blood in his mouth while the FBI stormed the place Quackity had him.
(Sapnap and George don't come to the hospital. Sapnap isn't sure how he's supposed to apologize and George is having 500000 meltdowns in his house. So they don't come, and Dream quietly packs up his apartment and transfers to a different lab, as far away from everyone as possible.)
In the end, there's enough evidence to arrest Quackity and Schlatt. Quackity gets imprisoned, Schlatt manages to skeeve by because they can't prove he ordered the hit.
Schlatt is the first victim when Quackity breaks out. Dream recognizes his suit, even covered in grime as it is.
Serial killer Quackity breaking out of jail and leaving his poker chip calling cards. Dream arrives at a crime scene and sees one and just. He dissociates a little and Punz is looking super worried but Dream brushes it off and gathers the crime scene stuff together and goes home.
Only to get there and receive a phonecall or a letter from Quackity and things suddenly feel Very Unsafe Forever.
(when Dream gets panic attacks he gets angry, hates that he can't control himself, hates that this still has to matter even all these years later.)
-
When Dream and Sam get together, there's a sort of sigh of relief. Finally, everyone seemed to think. Maybe they can stop acting like they're in a soap opera. This is incorrect because they simply become more insane about each other in different ways, but for a Single Day there is hope.
For FBI Agent Punz, its a bit of a different story.
They're meant to investigate the murders that Dream solves, collect info and interrogate people. Protect Dream and keeps him from getting hurt on cases. Dream starts out as very lukewarm to cold with most people, and the agent assigned to him is no different. It takes a lot of work to win Dream's trust, and Punz doesn't even have to be friends with him to work together, but They Want To Try.
Sam comes to the forensics lab after Dream has gradually warmed to Punz, and they're at the beginnings of what could be romance. And then Sam shows up and suddenly he's in Dream's space So Easily So Happily and Dream is incredibly tender with this man Punz has never met.
And that's annoying as fuck.
Punz has learned the ins and outs of Dream, has come to love him fiercely, nearly In Love, and suddenly Sam Is Here.
And Sam thinks Punz is Good for taking care of Dream, keeping him safe, Punz is wonderful, so pretty and handsome and powerful and could lift Sam off the ground- But Don't Worry About That.
Sam doesn't think of Punz as Enemy Rival Number 1, he thinks of Punz as Potential New Friend At Job Who Also Understands How Important Dream Is, Surely.
Punz had a very comfortable, calm, unobtrusive thing going between him and Dream and now there's a very pleased creeper invading his space and touching Dream and being way too nice.
Punz is not used to people being that nice.
If this were a tv show the theme of like half the season would be Punz trying to navigate this new person who everyone else insists is perfectly normal (they have to be lying. There has to be some dark secret here. Dream doesn't smile like that for other people. He's vulnerable and there's a Threat. Why is Sam offering to get lunch with Punz???)
Sam is very bad at flirting with Punz. Mostly because he doesn't realize he's flirting with Punz. Punz also doesn't realize he's flirting with Punz
Its not Sam's fault Punz is just!!!! So strong, the epitome of a strong protector, the thing Sam always wished he could be. Punz's laugh is more like a bark and when he puts his hand on your shoulder and squeezes its like a promise of safety.
Of course Sam would want that for Dream. Of course Sam wants that. Its only natural.
When Punz says "no I'm busy" or politely rejects Sam's offers of lunch or Getting To Know Each Other, Sam is just a lost puppy who assumes If he Tries Again surely Punz will be his friend.
(and of course it does eventually because Punz is not immune to friendship, much to their despair.)
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glitched-username · 4 months ago
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★heyllooo-★
★..sooo, erm, based on your latest post regarding concepts with rottmnt g/t and stuff, a little concept has been spiraling around in my head based on - these parts of your rambles★ :
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★And this- has got me thinkinggg.. what if everyone who got mutated into an animal of some sorts just, as you said, let's the size take priority ?? Now this could go both ways, like- a person, depending on the species that they turn into after getting bitten by an oozequito (how is it spelled, help) has the misfortune of forming onto said size★
★Im, gonna give some very specific examples here★ :
|⭐| For instance, if a person transforms into some sort of a bug, it is safe to say that their size would reduce to just a couple of inches tall, maybe even smaller than that.
|⭐| They get turned into a bunny ?? Then their new found size should be about 10-20 inches tall-..I think- I dunno, (by the way, the smallest species of a rabbit is called a pygmy bunny and they can reach up to only 12 inches tall.. I think-)
|⭐| They happen to be close to an orca during the process of their mutation ?? They might just reach a length of 5.5 to 9.8 meters .. pretty big.
★You get the idea- well, you pretty much formed it.. Unlessss, the sizey thing was just a hiccup that occured because the mutant-gen was still in testing and stuff- ?? (or is it empyrean ?? Fuck I gotta go to the turtle-pedia- ) ★
★either way, it would make for a pretty cool, ermm, concept to add to the 'ROTTMNT' universe- !!★
★..(and imagine the tons of g/t content we could feast on (⁠☆‹ ☆⁠) !!)★
★yeah ermm, your rambling is quite cool by the way anddd, (I hope that..i dunno, you meet a giant in real life that just so happens to be like rise!raph)★
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Oh, Draxum 100% would not have wanted the animal height to take priority, he just didn't think of the way heights would be affected with the mutation. Many dangerous/strong animals are actually much smaller than humans (wolves, spiders, monkeys, etc.) so he would be more interested in trying to find a way to prioritize the human height to a certain point. Super dumb way I could phrase it but, it'd kinda be like
if(HumanHeight > AnimalHeight){
HumanHeight = Height;
}
else{
AnimalHeight = Height;
}
idk if that makes sense but that's how I view it (can you tell I'm a fucking donnie kinnie lmao). And this is also my excuse so that the other mutants that appear in the show are still their OG sizes instead of getting to the heights of crabs and pigs. Would also make it funnier when the rogues gallery are giants compared to the turtles and yet the turtles still manage to kick ass.
Honestly Draxum would only recognize the boys as his creations by their height and is just like "well, they still have lou jistu DNA and survived THIS long... maybe I can still work with this?"
Anyway currently writing some stuff based on this au and I'm starting with the first meeting with April, which if you read my thoughts on how that would go... teehee
And Imma be real, I'm projecting hard when I write about giant raph stuff, because I would love to have that mystic power. idk who assembled my tiny 5 foot 2 self in the factory but I am ridiculously giant coded lmao. I would lose my mind immediately if I got some borrower friends. I even got a tiny handheld robot guy that I love because he's a tiny robot friend :))
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echo-lore · 1 year ago
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Au where Macaque was the first to find Mk, kept him for a couple of years, and later gave him away to the only person he could trust once the lady bone demon started getting a little too comfortable for macaques liking.
Chang’e!
So Mks ends up getting raised up on the moon by Chang’e with just the bunnies and the stars as entertainment with the occasional visit of Macaque.
I like to think he shows up a lot in Chang’e cooking show but usually for special episodes as an example of what not to do as a beginner. (Chang’e had no idea why his so bad at cookings. She’s tried, she really has, and he can make some mean baked goods, but anything else and the kitchen will be in ruin).
Chang’e would probably get really sad sometimes and tell Mk all about Hou Yi (her husband) and how she wish Mk could have met him and how much Hou Yi would have loved him (as far as I’m aware they never had kids but do correct me if I’m wrong!) and she often brings Mk to Hou Yi altar.
She also talks about macaque since it is very obvious to her that that’s Mks favorite guardian, but she doesn’t take offense to it. So instead of growing with stories of the Monkey king, he grows up with the stories of a young six-eared macaque. Although he does know about the monkey king, considering that he does have access to the internet, but he doesn’t talk much about considering the one time he did macaque got really really quiet and left as quickly as he could.
Canon story wise- Mk ends up being more like a tourist by the time he meets Mei. He probably snuck out of the moon, made a deal with the jade rabbit to “please not tell mama” and found himself, freshly 14 and on earth for the first time in a while and his in shock staring up at all the tall building and lights that his heard off, and kinda remembers existing from the few time macaque brought him into the city when he still lived on earth. He probably ends up bumping into Mei one way or another (someone’s probably overwhelm and crying; could be Mei because of family expectations or MK because he didn’t realize how different he actually was, but they meet and immediately become besties cause they deserve each other in every universe).
He ends up sneaking out way more and chang’e does take notice eventually that the moon is much quieter than usual also because you know she’s in the moon. She can absolutely see the stupid shit mks getting into on earth, but she wasn’t gonna stop him, she’s just happy he has a friend his age!
He probably tries to hide the fact that the closest thing his had to a mother literally ever is the goddess of the moon herself but he does a shit job at it and Mei found out like immediately once they meet up again. He does on the other successfully hide the fact he knows magic and is really good at it. After all he does have a lot of time to do things back up there in the moon.
Also Mei brings him to pigsy’s on one of the times they hang out and pigsy immediately recognizes him as chang’e special guest and freaks out. He keeps it together long enough for Mk to leave back to the moon before he officially geeks out to tang who’s very confused.
Also Macaque probably realizes that mks in the city and also freaks out, calls chang’e to rat Mk out, expecting some sort of disciplinary action but all he gets is loud laughter and “let the kid live a little!”
Also also Mei introduces roller skating to Mk and mother fucker. Freaks. Out.
(ALSO Mk with moon and bunny jewelry. EVERYWHERE.)
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piqueconcentration · 8 months ago
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"Clay Pigeons" and the Blaze Foley Rabbit Hole
Originally posted Nov 9, 2022
This person, in the picture below, is Blaze Foley- a man that I had never heard of until a few days ago. He is also one of the most influential folk and country music singer-songwriters (arguably) that there ever has been.
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At the Folk & Forage music festival this past weekend, my good friend Jenner Fox, the incredible musician and veritable jukebox of a human being, began playing a song that I recognized, right as I was leaving the fire to get ready for bed. Several of my very close family friends -essentially extended family- were warming themselves by the flames, instruments in hand; they had just been playing a medley of John Prine songs after a particularly Prine-centric evening (John Prine, for the uninitiated, is -unlike Foley- an extremely famous singer-songwriter. His music inspired nearly an entire generation of the folk genre, and he is credited with such masterpieces as "I Remember Everything," "Angel From Montgomery," "In Spite of Ourselves," and on and on and on), but I was tired and the darkness required I have resolve enough to make it through the nighttime woods back to the cabin.
In any case, the song that Jenner's dad had asked him to play quietly landed upon my ear snail, and it was "Clay Pigeons". Now, my experience with this song was limited. Unfortunately, I have to admit that I had only heard it played by Michael Cera, who, if you don't have your finger on the pulse of contemporary indie/comedy filmmaking, is a bit of a young people's darling after his roles in Arrested Development, Superbad, and Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, among other things, and he currently is (presumably) enjoying quite the successful indie music stint. The absolutely insufferable hipster buried in me might scoff at the prospect of listening to someone who gained even a bit of notoriety from something as... repugnant as being an actor, especially one that people near my age swoon for, but that part of me sucks and I hate it and I wish it would shut up.
In any case, I was under the impression that the song in question, one that I had always really loved for a lot of reasons- its simultaneous simplicity, understated yet heartfelt lyrics and its confusingly ever-appealing melody (there isn't really a good way to explain something like that, but it manages to hit you right in the heart with only, like, three notes per line) was written by Cera, as i hadn't really heard or known to go looking for any other recordings of it. I listened to Jenner pick the rest of the tune, me quietly singing the harmonies as if subconsciously to prove my music-knowing chops to the people around me -people I need not prove anything to, as if there are any people like that at all- and asked: a) whether it bothers him that I like every song that he plays so much that I end up copying him and learning them all myself, and b) who wrote that one. I had noticed some differences in the lyrics between his and Cera's versions, and I guess I deduced that the latter was not, in fact, their author. He said "Blaze Foley" and I wrote that down in my notebook, joked to him about my musical/composorial confusion, said my good-nights, and went to bed with the melody still dancing around my brain.
It was still dancing several days after I got back to my house, and I went looking for another recording, worrying that the one I would like best may end up being the one that I'd heard first by nature of its earlier discovery. The first three versions that I found were the one by Michael Cera from the 2014 album True That, the Blaze Foley one on Sittin' by the Road from 2010, and the John Prine recording on 2005's Fair and Square. I immediately grew several sizes larger than my pants. The texts I sent to Jenner immediately after that go thusly, without grammatical correction:
well what do you know, clay pigeons isnt originally by blaze foley, it's by JOHN PRINE
*It is now, as I am writing this, that I am immensely grateful for the fact that Jenner was not entirely knowledgeable about the origins of the song.*
wait nevermind what
ok the info on the internet is very confusing
god i was so confident too
All that confidence had dissipated as soon as I took more than a cursory glance at any other part of the internet than the first few results on Spotify that come up when you type in "clay pig." What probably tipped me off was learning that Blaze Foley died in 1989, so there was absolutely no way that the recordings could correspond with their listed dates.
I then went down the proverbial rabbit hole as the title implies, and through several stages of knowledge about the timeline of this almost mythical man and his music, so instead of taking the reader down the same, needlessly complex path that I took to get to what I know now, I'll just start telling you about the guy as chronicled by his album releases, particularly as they are listed on Spotify. I won't pretend to know by what system Spotify dates their albums, considering in this case it is wildly inaccurate, but for storytelling reasons I'll go through them in terms of their oldest to newest (seemingly arbitrary) dates. Let it be known, also, that one thing I've found all over the internet in researching him is that compared to other artists of similar time and renown, his music is "frustratingly scarce" (Spotify), as he only has a few studio albums, and his most reliable recordings are ones from when he was playing live. There are a few other reasons, but you'll learn about them in a bit.
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Actually that sounds kind of boring and made me stop writing for like two days because it didn't interest me, so I rescind that previous statement about writing about each album and will now be doing whatever I want.
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Anyway, the album above is In Tribute and Loving Memory... Volume #1, released in 1998- essentially a testament to just how much of an incredible impact Blaze Foley had on the musicians of his time, with covers of his songs from fifteen different artists, including several recordings from his personal friend and fellow musician Townes Van Zandt. It does not include, however, the covers done by even more famous artists (Merle Haggard & Willie Nelson, Joe Nichols & Lee Ann Womack, Nanci Griffith, Lyle Lovett, John Prine, Michael Cera, and Whitney) recorded before or after, or the songs that they wrote about Blaze (Townes Van Zandt's "Blaze's Blues," Lucinda Williams's "Drunken Angel," Gurf Morlix's "Music You Mighta Made," and Kings of Leon's "Reverend"). The point is, either his songwriting or his personality or both had a lasting effect on anyone he met, and continue to have one on the people that learn about him, considering my current admiration.
The things about his personality that made him endearing to so many are wild to hear about- he was an absolute enigma, an alcoholic, a troublemaker, regularly engaging in self-destructive behavior, writing a fair amount of songs that actively made people uncomfortable, what with their scathing political satire or their just straight up sometimes gross lyrics. He was seemingly familiar with homeless shelters, regularly destitute, wore shoes and clothes so old that they were almost more duct tape than leather or fabric -his affinity for duct tape was widely known- but he also had a reputation for being amicable, oddly charismatic, and above all, a good friend.
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In my opinion, he is best characterized by songs from one of the few recording sessions of his that are readily available, when he played a show at the Austin Outhouse, "one of the few music establishments in town that would tolerate him" (Spotify). The performance, which took place on his thirty-ninth birthday, was long enough that the songs were split onto two albums. The first is Live at the Austin Outhouse, released cassette-only in 1989 and then again in 1999, and the second is Oval Room, released in 2004.
In many of the songs from the former, oddly at the end of the songs, you can hear a monologue from Foley about the tune he is about to play next (these days, if there is a monologue at all, it would normally happen in the same "song" as the song, but that is most likely a product of the album translating to streaming format in an unconventional manner). As it was played live, the listener is treated to the sounds of the audience, the interaction between the people on the stage, you can even tell when Blaze's jokes land and get the audience hooting and hollering, or sometimes don't land and the crowd doesn't laugh. It is an absolutely wonderful portrait of a man just slightly more weird than the people around him, and I think that is a beautiful thing.
Some of my favorite of his unhinged sermons, that I have attempted to transcribe in his exact manner of speech:
"*strum* And uh, ahm on' send it to Merle Haggard, I'un know if he'll read it, or not, but if anybody wants 's say hello t' Merle say 'hello' now. *'Hello, Merle!/Hey, Merle!' from audience* Hey, Merle. (presumably Foley, impersonating Kermit the Frog) Uh, Merle, this is Kermit, yeah. *Audience''s continued greetings, one woman laughing, strum* Uh, have you seen Miss Piggy uh last I heard she w's on yer buss. I'm kinda miffed, uh, Merle, know what I mean? *silence, strum* Cuz it's not easy being green- *strum* (no longer Kermit:) This's call' 'Our Little Town.'"
-Blaze Foley on the track "New Slow Boat to China," before playing "Our Little Town," Live at the Austin Outhouse, 1989
"This's call' Officer Norris. *chord strum* ihs' about a, cop that, put me in jail one time fer'... I was with a, married wom'n an' her, child. An' her husban' wun'n there and the cop didn' like that an' we were all friends, n' it ws', on the up-an'-up kinda. *slow chord strum* But anyway a cop stopped us fer', swervin'... after leavin' a Burger King parking lot an' goin' ten feet an' the car was like fourteen feet long. An' ih's like 'well, how could we swerve? Car's, not that short.' But anyway, 'Shut up, boy.' An' they put me in jail an' I had tinnis shoes on an' they had a concrete floor, it's'uh night kinna like t'night n' my guitar w's in the back of a truck, an' I w's afraid it was gettin' rained on n' the case wuhdn'n good *chord* so I wrote this song. But anny'way, I kep' stompin' on'n concrete floor w' my tinnis shoes n' they never heard me n'... my feet paid. *two strums, picking* So I, now I wear taps on my tinnis shoes."
-Blaze Foley on the track "Our Little Town," before playing "Officer Norris," Live at the Austin Outhouse, 1989
And on Oval Room, the other album made from that one show at the Outhouse, where most of the monologues are removed, there is one song called "20 Years Introduction," which is just Blaze speaking about the next song he's going to play (possibly "Someday," which is the next song on the album, but it's unclear if the songs are actually in the order that he played them that night). A portion of the same monologue appears before the track "Our Little Town" on In Tribute and Loving Memory... Volume #1.
"A lot of people say I'm, half sick, most uh' the time. *strum* But I can tell you that I'm... mostly not sick, most uh' the time. *strum* But anyway, uh... (unintelligible) this might not end up on'nuh record I hope not 'cuz I soun' like a hillbilly, *two strums* but uh, this talkin' part (chuckle). But anyway I'm jus' g'nna see what, what happens, like twen'y years from now I might still be haun'ted by this. *strum* Or, maybe not."
-Blaze Foley on the track "20 Years Introduction," Oval Room, 2004
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Blaze Foley was shot and killed on February 1, 1989, a month and a half after he played that show. He had wanted the proceeds of the album to go to a homeless shelter, but they were used to pay for his funeral costs instead (Spotify). His friends wrapped his coffin in duct tape.
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The next part is about where all his music went. Thankfully, we happen to be living in the age of peak musical availability, and several of the "lost" albums have been found, but I think it's worth taking a look at just how much trouble it took to get it all back. Normally, in a situation like this where some media is gone or missing, I feel like there's generally some sort of motive from someone that keeps it from resurfacing, like a crooked producer or a greedy company, but in this case, it just seems as though the Universe was adamantly determined to hide whatever the man in question wrote.
I think Foley's Wikipedia page puts it best:
"The master tapes from his first studio album were confiscated by the DEA when the executive producer was caught in a drug bust. Another studio album disappeared when the master copies were stolen with his belongings from a station wagon that Foley had been given and lived in.  A third studio album, Wanted More Dead Than Alive, was thought to have disappeared until, many years after Blaze died, a friend who was cleaning out his car discovered what sounded like the Bee Creek recording sessions on which he and other musicians had performed. This was Foley's last studio album, and he was scheduled to tour the UK with Townes Van Zandt in support of the album. When Foley died, his attorney immediately nullified the recording contract and the master tapes subsequently disappeared (reportedly lost in a flood)" (Wikipedia).
Anyway, I now adore his songwriting. I love the simple chord progressions, and as someone who struggles with needing to feel wholly original when I try to write a song, it's a powerful reminder that a song can be what feels like a masterpiece without being a ridiculous, jazzy scalebreaker. I love, in "Clay Pigeons," how the final verse is made up of parts from the first and last verses. I love his tendency to sometimes add a part of the melody at the end of a line that sounds like it's preparing to loop back around, that doesn't complete the melody but is like the lyrical equivalent of a sus chord. I love how the words he uses never feel forced or out of place. I love how I can't quite understand what he's saying metaphorically in his songs, it feels like it makes it simultaneously more personal and easier to listen to.
It makes me happy that we have what we have left of his work.
In conclusion, I think that artists should say the name of the original composer in the title of covers that they release.
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References:
Dave HJ (Director). (2015, May 3). Blaze Foley—Clay Pigeons, rare Live. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uM3YROq_cLY
Blaze Foley. (n.d.). Spotify. Retrieved November 5, 2022, from https://open.spotify.com/artist/1TlScGwN8MmIZ7kIYGjSZA
Blaze Foley age, hometown, biography | Last.fm. (n.d.). Retrieved November 8, 2022, from https://www.last.fm/music/Blaze+Foley/+wiki
Blaze Foley music, videos, stats, and photos. (n.d.). Last.Fm. Retrieved November 5, 2022, from https://www.last.fm/music/Blaze+Foley
Blaze Foley on Apple Music. (n.d.). Apple Music. Retrieved November 5, 2022, from https://music.apple.com/us/artist/blaze-foley/44075415
Blaze Foley. (2022). In Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Blaze_Foley&oldid=1111200666
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