#The fandom is making me lose my mind WHY ARE THEY THE MOST POPULAR SHIP!!!!!!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!!!!!!!!
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shizukahaiji · 2 years ago
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I Have Had Enough
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ryuichirou · 4 months ago
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A couple of replies, a longer one about fandom.
hadesdancehall asked:
BOKU NO RISOU NO ROI DE POISON DE WA I'M LOSING MY MIND OVER TETTERE!ROOK
YESSSSS YES YES I AM SO HAPPY YOU GET IT LOL Rook and Tettere are the same, the idea of this crossover was driving me crazy, I had to draw it. Look at him go, singing about continuously loving every single person until he finds the one…
Fun fact about this sketch: we have no idea why I drew Alte-Rose!Malleus there. It’s been a while since I drew this sketch, and I completely forgot… I guess she had to deal with this Tettere too, so it kind of fits lol
Anonymous asked:
I know you aren't really type to give information just gorgeous art. But in your last reply post you said you do traditional art and just coloured them digitally.
So I'm wondering... How do you do it!?
Because everytime I try to do that it looks so weird. I can't seem to get the colors as vibrant as I can when I'm only doing digital.
Thank you for praising my art! But Anon, I do give information :c I wrote a reply about this exact topic just a couple of days ago which is filled to the brim with links about everything in my art process + have a guide about exactly this topic.
Your colours might seem off for a number of reasons, it’s hard to tell exactly why by just guessing. It can be related to your software/display or directly to your choice of colours.
Anonymous asked:
Ryu, your dissatisfaction with Twisted Wonderland's age rating is very understandable! The game is allegedly a joseimuke game aimed at adult women, especially in light of the fact that this is a gacha game and that adults—who earn a regular income—will be the true target market. It's a little frightening that adults who play these kinds of games have to be so careful about how we express our affection for the characters lest we be labelled as predators or worse, p*dos. Making adult gamers feel bad for enjoying these "children" who are clearly meant to be adults. They're fictional, and most of them definitely don't look or act like boys their age. Some characters appear so mature; this really struck me as being university attendee coded. It's not like the ensemble is exclusively comprised of children, you know? The game revolves around attractive anime boys who are intentionally created to appear older than they actually are. Unfortunately, despite the fact that i enjoy Twisted Wonderland, it is the first fandom where i experienced Ageism in a fandom.
Trey is, if my memory serves me correctly, one of the most well-liked characters in the Japanese fandom (i remember there used to be a JP poll asking which character in Twist was the most loved). Most likely due to his personality, which again makes sense given that the majority of Twist users are grownups and Trey's portrayal of a character who, despite being a young adult, is quite mature.
Furthermore, even though I realise I'm going to sound like Idia, I detest how the "Normies" entered Nerd/Geek spaces after gaining popularity and then pretended to be uncomfortable with what they saw. You came to OUR space, dude! What did they expect?!
Anon! Sorry for replying late, and thank you! You’ve made so many very good points.
It really is an obvious joseimuke in how the game is written, how the game operates (the gacha system, like you mentioned) + even the type of merch that exists for this game. If you think about it, this is probably the best way to determine the actual target audience of any piece of media: just like Prince of Tennis is technically a classic Shonen Jump series, but all the merch they have is clearly aimed at adult women (purses, perfume, etc).
So yeah, even if that wasn’t the case, calling people predators over shipping themselves with Azul would be a bad thing to do, but in this situation especially it’s absurd to call people out for interacting with TWST pretty much the way it was indented…
What you said about the characters’ age and Trey specifically is so true. To be fair, this could be said about any joseimuke-like title with a big ensemble of boys, Prince of Tennis included. All the characters there are 12-15 years old, but god some of them look over 30.
I think it is important to keep in mind the intended age to a degree (= I dislike how the EN translation tries to dance around mentioning the boys’ age), and Twst does a good job at keeping these boys authentic when it matters, but it doesn’t mean that people won’t ship them with other characters or themselves. And no one questions it and no one finds it weird because it isn’t. It’s not that deep, it has nothing to do with how real teens look or act, this is a fantasy in people’s heads, it’s escapism, it so different and so far removed from the regular boring life it’s insane. It’s so difficult not to sound like Idia, SO I FEEL YOU ANON.  Someone called it the moe factor that some people just don’t get. So I guess it really is about people being normies sometimes lol I wish they would leave already.
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hxhhasmysoul · 6 months ago
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Have you seen this? https://www.tumblr.com/gojosbf/748604451516006400/hey-guys-what-the-fuck-is-this-who-is-voting?source=share
[That is satosugu blog (sorry).]
Just want to say : thanks so much @hxhhasmysoul. You open a new door to me, in shipping Sukuna/Itadori, and it's in the top 5 fav ships above.....As a multishipper, I never consider SukuIta until I found this blog of yours (especially your SukuIta fics recs).
I've read all SukuIta fics from your fics recs list, do you mind if I ask another fics recs? Also, thanks a lot for the Killua/Gon fics recs, really love them.....🤩
Don’t apologise for linking a SatoSugu blog, you don’t have to warn me  XD Thank you for the ask, I will be really mean, so just a fair warning.
Also it’d be pretty obvious that they are a SatoSugu blog even if you hadn’t warned me. What gives them away is that they can’t read, reading comprehension is just rare among the fans of that ship.  
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They ask who voted in a ranking made based on the amount of published works on Pixiv XD
It’s even funnier no one in the notes noticed that. 
But these comments are fascinating to me.
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So like 3 Gojou x Getou is reasonable but 4 Getou x Gojou is not, so it’s unreasonable for Getou to top? Is that it? 
Same with 7 and 8, it’s even funnier because the preference as to who tops is usually reverse in the western fandom XD
I’m not sure why Yuuta x Toge is not reasonable.. I mean they are the same age, right? 
Well Gojou x Utahime they disapprove on the forced straightness grounds, I mean even if they ship stsg, Getou’s dead, and Gojou could be bi… but whatever icky woman is icky.  
I mean I disapprove of shipping Gojou in general, because I think all Gojou ships are either misogyny or queerphobia, because he’s too awful to force onto other people… The dumb fascist is the only one that can be punished thusly, they are equally awful as people ;)
I guess the ships between Megumi and Toge, or Gojou and Nanami or Ijichi are pedo ships, because Toge is a year older than Megs and Gojou is at least a year older than either of them. Or is Gojou x Ijichi just simple abuse? I’d call it that. Oh, and I checked Nanami x Ijichi and that’s just clearly pedo stuff, Nanami is one year older. (Honestly this ship could be really nice, Ijichi could use a guy who can stand up for himself and actually is thoughtful)
What more can I say… Generally there being just two Sukuna ships is disappointing, people have poor aesthetic taste. No Kenny ship is also sad, especially seeing how popular Toge is and well that guy gets barely any development in the story, he’s kinda boring to me. 
As to Yuuji’s ships. GoYuu falls under Gojou shouldn’t be shipped, period. The ships with Megumi I get. Nanami and Chousou make sense too, even if they’re not my jam. But the ship with Getou… every time I see it, it makes me lose faith in humanity a little. 
___
I’m glad you got into SukuIta. More fics:
Smail just has a lot of stuff and I love most of it.
This is specifically what Smail wrote for me.
Creepy and hot trapped in spaceship smut.
Sweet and sexy Escort AU by Yuujispinkhair.
Monsterfucker Coffee Shop AU smut.
Hot Hockey Player Groupie AU smut.
Sukuna reincarnates as a cat, serves him right.
Art and short fics some very smutty.
This is one of my top 3 fics ever it was supposed to be crack but the author failed and now it's a very long fic with amazing relationship dynamics.
And another gem by the same author where Sukuna gets domesticated.
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randomprosho · 3 months ago
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"I don't support it in real life!"CW: talk of sexualizing minors, slight rant
Then why write about it? If for coping purposes, why post it online for others (especially actual predators) to see and consume? Then why portray those things in a positive light instead of condemning them?And you're seriously going to tell me that just because as an adult (1) you want to see a fictional minor (that mind you, is usually designed to resemble an actual child) depicted in sexual situations doesn't mean you don't share that same view concerning children in real life? You find fictional minors attractive but not real ones? Why does the line between finding someone who is (and usually also looks like) a child sexually attractive get drawn at whether the child is real or not? I'm not calling anyone pedophiles, but if the shoe fits...(1) No I am not talking about 18 y/os finding 17 y/os attractive. Use your brain. Creating content of underaged characters is still questionable regardless of age, however.
"Just mute/block instead of harassing others!"I have nearly 70k people blocked on twitter, and hundreds of words and tags muted, I softblock and mute people who post things I don't want to see. I still see certain things on my timeline, usually because1) It's posted in the main tags of something I'm interested in2) The post isn't even tagged at all3) If someone quote retweets from someone I've blocked, I still see the take on my timeline.
"Antis use the same rhetoric as exclusionists and TERFS!"What exactly does being against pedophilia have to do with trans (women) exclusionary radical feminism?And what does lgbtq discourse in general have to do with not wanting minors to be sexualized?
"Antis harass people!"Apparently, proshippers have never done this before! Not once has a grown adult stalked literal children for calling their ships gross!Not saying harassments ok at all, but let's not act like the poor proshippers are being oppressed here.Also, I promise you, someone saying "x is a proshipper, please block them if you don't want to see their content" is not harassment. Writing callout posts and videos on underaged "antis", however is most definitely harassment but y'all don't want to hear that. People have the right to know if they are platforming people who go against their personal beliefs and morals. Choosing to hide that from people who would otherwise not want to interact with you for the sake of not wanting to "lose friends" makes you a bad person, and you should feel bad.
this is a LOT anon, my god...
First I'll say what I do agree with you on: I have made posts and even agreed with antis or neutrals on proshippers harassing antis. I have seen it and have hated that it happens. Proshippers like to use being anti-harassment as a shield to harass people. Antis have made posts without accusing anyone of being anything nor making any kind of assumptions about any shippers and they would get HOUNDED by proshippers. I've seen it happen. I once followed a group of antis because they liked the same popular ship I liked in a fandom (I wont name). They were uncomfortable with certain shippers and proshippers following them, I respected their wishes and left. I saw from a proshipper qrting that same anti group that I unfollowed because they made a list of proshippers for that fandom so people could block. I did trust these antis because they were anti-harassment. I do agree that a lot of these kinds of lists do cause harassment but there were proshippers going up to this group being immature saying to be added to the list. And yes, they were harassed but like I said, I did trust this group, they were peaceful people. I have had good conversations with antis because I feel like there are some that just want to be heard. So I listen to them. I am completely fine with having conversations without being labeled something I am not. That you KNOW I am not. I WILL stick up for antis if they're not in the wrong, I dont care how many proshippers I will be going against. I am anti-harassment in the truest sense. NO one deserves to be harassed, least of all, children.
For all the other shit you said: "if the shoe fits" It dont. Pedophilia is a paraphilic disorder where the person has thoughts and emotions that could potentially harm a minor. These people have intrusive thoughts to the point it causes them distress. I, personally, do NOT suffer from this. People have the ability to separate fiction from reality. What I see when I look at anime characters is a cartoon character. I dont see actual literal children, no matter HOW they act. I can only speak for myself, but I dont like actual people, let alone, children. I dont want to be with anyone nor do anything with anyone. I use to be a schediaphile, which is a paraphilia where someone is sexually attracted to fictional characters, which lolishota are. I honestly never was sexually attracted to lolishota. I only find them cute and when I like cute things, I like fucked up shit to happen to them because I like dark/taboo type of fiction. Even if something is shown in a positive way, it is STILL fucked up, isnt it?
When I post anything sexual about a lolishota, I am able to distance myself from it: Aegosexual.
There is a LOT of violence that is shown as a positive in fiction but no anti ever goes hard against it like they do when it comes to anything depicting sex. Violence is always seen as a good thing, while sex is bad.
It is a-okay to be disgusted and grossed out over any fiction no matter what. What isnt okay is harassing someone over fiction because you find it icky. I personally dont like gore but I would never go after someone making assumptions that they're gonna go on a murder spree.
I dont use lolishotacon as a way to cope because I havent been through anything like that. I just think they're cute, thats it.
btw, I am also blocking a shit ton of people on twitter. I block people every single day. I see NSFW art I dont want to see all the time. It does cause me a teeny bit of anxiety but I literally breathe out a sigh of relief when I block them so I dont see their shit anymore. If you're following ppl that qrt people you've blocked, maybe you should unfollow those people. you are the only person who can look out for you, unless your a minor, then thats your parents/guardians job
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Hi. I think it’s time guys...
Yeah, you heard me right. 
I think I’m closing down Western Magical Girl confessions, for good this time...
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Why do I finally come to this decision? 
Well, one reason is that I’ve ran this blog for a very long time, and I think I’m finally ready to move on to other things.
I think western magical girl shows are starting to become a rarity this day in age. Shows like Lolirock, Equestria Girls, She Ra, Star vs., Winx Club, The Owl House etc. are over. There’s not much hype for western magical girl series (or magical girl series in general) like it used to be. The only real popular western magical girl series that’s still airing is Miraculous Ladybug, in which that leads to my other reason.
I’m slowly starting to lose interest in Miraculous Ladybug also. I’ve pretty much got all the satisfaction that I could get out of the show at this point. Yes, I’ll probably still do some headcanons, AUs, shipping memes, writing prompts etc. from the series, but I’m basically done with the canon.
Also...I think that I personally just want to try to detach myself from this blog. I have...life goals. Life goals that I want to really start making for myself. I want to prioritize a lot more things in my life that’s OUTSIDE of the internet. 
Also, I have 5 other blogs. Keeping up with them too is a little...tedious now, especially ones that are becoming ghost blogs as time goes on. 
So for all of these reasons, I think I’m ready to say goodbye to this part of my life...soon. 
That’s right, “Soon”, as in...not right at this moment. 
I want to do these things first before finally moving on.
I want to at least finish all of the confessions in the box, so I’ll be closing the submissions box and inbox for confessions and headcanons. So that means any confessions or headcanons that are send at this point will automatically be DELETED.
After I do, I will close them for about a week or two.
I’m going to make a poll, asking for your opinions on this. Maybe even more than 1.
After I get the final results of that poll (or polls), I might temporarily open confessions back up for about a week (or maybe even a month, I don’t know yet), to give everyone a chance to confess anything that they want. Then I’ll reclose confessions and do those confessions. 
After that, I will most likely close western magical girl confession...for good. 
But you know? Who knows??? I MIGHT change my mind. I MIGHT wait until Miraculous Ladybug season 5 is over. However, to be honest though? I hope not. 
Sorry guys, I really am. No offense, but...it’s just I KNOW that I’m week😂 I might just decide to keep this blog up for a little while longer, but I’m not making any promises. I want to be done with this blog. Will that happen or not is all due in time. 
I want to appreciate everyone who has send a confession in the past! I really appreciate it and I’m going to miss you all ^^ I’ll be on my other blogs for now on, so if you're interested, just find me at the blogs that I’ll list below. Thank you for all the good years in the fandoms and all the good times! I wish you all the best of luck in your futures. I’ll never forget the fun I had running this blog...
I love you, farewell, and as always...
Stay magical, Times Infinity ~ 
-MC (aka @curesweetbea27)
My other blogs, if you're interested:
@equestriaqueerz2023​
@miraculousbeezcentral​
@ask-sonata-dusk​
@riseconfessions​
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siliyis · 1 year ago
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I am ready to make an enemy out of the communities here. I don't know if this is the most controversial take in tumblr (I doubt it is) but I don't care. Y'all can hate me.
Fandoms don't like female characters. Y'all really don't.
Let me tell you a little story before we jump in. I've made a comment, about a female character, that I don't give a fuck about, and said, if she was male, she would be aggressively shipped with this one male character. I've said it because she looked so hot as a guy (fanart) that I belive the ship would be popular. Mind you, I didn't watch the show. I just know she doesn't like the guy and always banter with him and that's a dynamic shippers eat it up only when it's M/M.
Someone came and said the popular M/M of that show would still be popular if one of the character is female therefore, I'm wrong.
Mind you, I didn't watch the show so I did a quick search on WHEN does the character dies (lmao) and that's all I needed to know to fucking say NO, IT WON'T. It won't be popular if it was a girl.
The ironic part? I'm aware that, statistically, M/M dominate in ships and in so many other areas. But that's not why I said it won't be popular. Rather because female character are NOT relevant in fandoms. They are not! There is no way, a female character, will play a big importance in ONE arc and dies in that same arc.... that would make a fandom sob, cry, hyperventilate the way it did to this fandom! It never WILL! The man dies too quickly. If it was a female, she will not be relevant. Female characters will never make any big impact the way male character do even if they are written the EXACT SAME WAY.
Hell, they can't even making it to the top 10 rankings of favorite character in their OWN series. You usually see 1 female then the rest of the 9 be male. And it's usually a character who is the main female with the rest of the cast. A side male character will always beat the side female character in these shows.
One of the things I've noticed with the way people treat female character is, if she have a crush/love interest and y'all would act like it's the biggest ICK about her character and she suddenly loses all support while simultaneously, thirsting, salivating, over the same character she likes and behave like animals.
I learned, by being in fandoms, that a female character should never show interests in males. That's the only way she can remain in y'all "good favor" otherwise, it's not going to work. Males can do bare minimum and we gonna dkride them so hard.
How many female characters, if they were male, would be MORE liked than they are now? How many male characters, if they were female, would be LESS liked than they are now?
Liking a female character is a fucking BATTLEFIELD while liking male character is the smoothest ride ever (except for Sanji but he doesn't count for obvious reasons).
Having a male character favorite is just easy if dumbasses aren't power scaling. I might find someone who hates my favorites once in a blue moon and all I can think about is, "THANK GOD someone hate him. I thought he doesn't have haters." I can move on from it because he gets an overwhelming love that it doesn't matter if someone dislike him.
The female characters, on the other hand, you need to get the gun ready to start shooting because you will defending her for days. The hate would show up on your FYP out of nowhere, there is a long discussion about why she suck, they are debates, there are people who don't think she is that great, people who undermine her importance to the plot, people talking about, "I don't care about her. Her story arc is not bad, she is just not it. (aka not a male) I just don't feel her, blah blah. I won't be saying this if she was male, blah, blah, blah."
So in conclusion, y'all hate females.
Or to be accurate, they are not relevant for y'all. Fandoms don't care about them.
Let's just acknowledge that and move on with our lives because I don't want to hear shit from someone who likes over 100 male characters but will struggle to pick 10 females they really like. If the number of females don't even make 20% of the amount of males you have liked, don't fake outrage under my post talking about how it's not true. I don't care if y'all don't like them. Just don't lie.
I know you gonna say, there is more male characters than female which is true but if we consider the overall medium, you have OPTIONS. I'm literally saying to not limit it. If you can't name 50 female characters across an ENTIRE medium but can for males? Don't bother arguing with me.
Anyway, it's a real shame to see that female characters aren't written that much in archiveofourown. There are so many female characters that could have made it to the rankings of the 2023... but like I said, female characters aren't relevant so I shouldn't be surprised they struggling to make the list for that too.
Feel free to tag if you think it applies. It doesn't matter if they are from other mediums like Harry Potter, Star Wars or anything like that. If it fits, it fits. I'm going to tag a few random anime fandoms because chances are, it's not your fandom (maybe it is) but I'm still tagging because it's common here.
If I'm loud and wrong then I'm loud and wrong. People hated Jesus for telling the truth.
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roleplayhonestybox · 11 months ago
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Storytime, I was in a server for a popular video game. The fandom hottie is played by a long-term mutual(We'll call her Zee), and I play an original character for that fandom.
Me and Zee have been pretty close for years! A lot of our primary muse ships are between each other. One of these is between this Fandoms hottie and my original muse. When we joined the group, I was very worried about people feeling like we were excluding them due to our close friendship. So I asked Zee to hold off on shipping our characters. At least until we get deeper into the plot. I also asked her to keep an open mind about shipping, She didn't need to ship with me just cause. Zee agreed, and everything was fine.
Until last night.
So, at this point, this whole group of 6 has been writing together for months. We are in the middle of a side plot for Zee's muse. A few weeks prior, Zee approached me about shipping again because she kinda likes the vibe our characters have at the moment. I think it's fine by now. Everyone seems really cool. So I say sure. Last night was when the ship became official.....all hell broke lose, by the way.
This guy(let's call him Jay) starts being SUPER mean to my character. Like out of fucking no where. I assume this was an in character thing and I respond in kind. His muse did have a crush on Zee's. So he's being petty. Its fine and makes sense for the muse.
But it wasn't for the muse. It never is! We finished our Rp, and after sessions, we have a little pow wow. Most catching up and just vibing. We didn't have a pow wow that night. I didn't question it cause I was tired anyway. So I played talked to Zee and went to bed.
I was removed from the server and blocked by morning. Why?
According to Jay and the server owner, I was extremely homophobic and I was erasing Gay men for my little fantasies. You know what's hilarious about that? Zee's fandom hottie muse...ISNT FUCKING GAY. He's not even gay in Canon! He's pansexual. Coming from a pansexual, Thats not the same thing! How can I erase gay men when there wasn't one to begin with?! If anything, that statement erases Pan/Bi men. Secondly, I never said anything Homophobic. Like ever. Shipping my character with Zee's wasn't my idea originally!
To make matters worst, Zee was not removed and they tried to make me look bad to her. Thankfully, my mutual just straight up asked to see proof. When they gave her none, she called me and asked. There sadly is more to this train wreck. Because there was a voice call between Jay, Zee, me and the server owner. But thats for another day.
😳
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thewarnerbrothers · 2 years ago
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alright i gotta say something
you really cant do anything when you have a moderately popular blog huh
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look. im a lurker at heart. i just happen to have one issue: not being able to shut up when im interested in something. thats the only reaaon this blog exists. i didnt come here to make friends, though i ended up doing that along the way
i dont want or need your pity. what i need is for people i dont know at all to stop putting me under a microscope
newsflash: i dont matter. follower count doesnt matter. at all. do you know what its like having thousands of eyes on you all the time? it sucks
i literally cant do anything
if i block literal strangers, they get mad and try to publicly shame me for it. if i try to settle disputes amicably in private, its seen as bad. if i attempt to be open and transparent with modding decisions, its bad. if i ask people to actually talk to me, they dont. instead they kick up a frenzy in private to coordinate a stupid mass hissy fit disproportionate to any perceived slight they may have endured. if i make friends, people take it personally. people see that as some sort of insult. i cannot be friends with everyone. i wont. this hurts strangers feelings, dspite me not existing for their pleasure.
some of you feel very entitled to my time. you dont own me. i dont owe you anything. ive tried to not lose the few molecules of my mind left on a regular basis because of some people who are no longer in this fandom, and some who still are. and man. i am just. tired. of everyone. all the time.
i think even more than the fact that this series was released (mainly) as a bingewatch fest, what killed this fandom was you
not necessarily you, whoever is reading this. i mean the fans. in general. some of you are so annoying, rude, inappropriate, and willfully lacking in social skills. youre over dramatic. youre moody. youre dramamongering. youre liars. youre bullies. youre self-ascribed victims. you dont care about other human beings.
youre repulsive, frankly
you are part of the reason people have been leaving the fandom in droves. the homophobia. the transphobia. the ship hate. the inability to treat other people with basic human decency. the manufactured scandals. shut up and grow up
you know why i barely interact with larger fandom anymore? ill tell you
waves of harassment to varying degrees ad nauseam
creeps who refuse to even try to keep their fetishes to themselves in private groups that include minors
abusers (most of whom are thankfully now gone)
people befriending me only to reveal that they dont actually like or care about me as a person
the most willfully socially inept people to ever exist
nosy jerks who literally cannot stand not sticking their nose in personal problems that have nothing to do with them
people treating me and my blog like im google adsense. im not a billboard guys
people deciding i am evil for no apparent reason? sdkjfalsdjfa
thinly veiled anythingphobia pretending to be socially just (hi homophobes who imply that being lgbt by nature is 'adult')
people who just make things up. all the time. just make up a lie, say it passionately enough. if you try to defend yourself, youre seen as guilty/suspicious. if you try to resolve things quietly with only those involved, you're seen as guilty/suspicious. cant win
wankers who need to learn why parasocial relationships arent actually meant to be embraced wholeheartedly
really lame one-off trolls tbh
the most fandom discourse-poisoned takes i have seen since su hatedom was at its peak
im just tired of being nice all the time? i think you guys just like taking advantage of people you imagine to be good targets
listen. i am allowed to do whatever i want, regardless of how you feel about it. the same thing goes for you. i tend to try to resolve things reasonably and rationally, but i wont pretend ive never gotten mad or overreacted or made a decision i regret. ive made that pretty known. i like to think i've grown, and ive gone out of my way to apologize to people.
however.
some of yall do not understand that just because your feelings got hurt, it doesnt mean you are deserve an apology or an explanation. sometimes it literally is just a you problem. a skill issue. you need to grow thicker skin. learn how to curate your online experience. get. over it.
lets talk about blocking, shall we?
blocking is great. i block people all the time. i block bots, i block tag spammers, i block people who make posts with rancid vibes, i block people who ive personally interacted with and no longer wish to, i block because i get tired of seeing someones posts, i block people who post things that trigger me, i block blogs with icons i dont like. there's usually no grand reason for it, aside from egregious cases where i've been harassed. its also usually not personal. i will block people who ive followed for years. i dont care. i dont know most of yall. i know i've been blocked by tons of people and that's okay! i would rather people who don't want to interact with me do that.
if you get blocked, thats it. dont attempt to contact me again unless i reach out. im not the only blog in this fandom. youll live without my posts. i am not the arbiter of all things animaney.
im just some guy
i know that the people who need to hear this most will not care nor will they actually absorb what i'm saying. ive gotten a lot of hate over the dumbest crap. im done. i think i need to stop trying to be so friendly, because some of you think being a little pissbaby is the only way to interact with others online.
cant wait til i finally explode one day and just delete everything
tldr shut up leave me alone oh my god its not that big a deal jesus christ
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bloogers-boogers · 2 years ago
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So I've been getting into the sp fandom lately and let me tell u it's a must for me to do a one-shot.. It's gonna be a good attempt
One-shot SP
/CURSE/
(Kinda shipping? (Kyle/Cartman) Kinda trying to replicate the imagination land scene where Kyle dies an other various scenes, Cartman(important for the plot),Cartman and Kenny lore,some Stan against, and death of a main character. Kenny plays a role, also y'know death and resurrection that's he's thing.. right?)
It a pretty damn long One-shot.
It's been a common day in the little mountain town of Colorado called south park, Randy had arranged a parade/party at one of the most popular places in town 'DikinBaus' because of some festive weed special (trying to make it seem out of the ordinary weed when it comes to the same shit with a diffrent label) that Stan Marsh and his three other friends would care less about, well, atleast one. Eric Cartman.
Yes, the little evil master mind of south park.
Bitch was angry and quite bitter about the fact that his old home was no longer his, after being part of creating it's popularity. Though he did deserve it and his jewish friend made it know.
"I don't know why you're so pissed off, Cartman, you we're asking for it when you took advantage of Butters hard work," The latter roll his eyes.
"Whatever, it's Butters," He stated, as if it were obvious.
"Dude, just be grateful you got your old house back," Stan tune in, his tone was a little bit frustrated then it should've, luckily his fat friend payed not much attention to it. He wished he could move back, be close to his friends, have his old life back. But his father was farther than an idiot to just let go of his marijuana dream.
"How am I gonna be grateful about losing my DikinBaus!?," He exclaimed angry. Kenny, their blonde friend snorted, "shut up Kinny!."
"C'mon man, it's not a big deal," He patted the bigger boy's shoulder in hopes he'll just moved on from the subject. But ofcourse, he didn't.
"No! I can't leave it like this with out a fight!, I work hard for that shitty place to reopen, it's not fair!," He clenched he's fist, glaring at the nothing.
Both three boys just looked at each other, in a mutual agreement of not getting involved.
Later that day, Stan was forced to partake in the event host by his father, ofcourse not before arguing and complaining about it being just another waste of the income they made, for then later on his father to complain about how they had no money for more resources. Repeat all the time. Stan just hold the bridge of his nose outta frustration.
No boy his age should be this stress out for his parents doings, in this scenario, his dad.
"Hey Stan, check this out!," Exclaimed excited, Randy. The boy followed him, as he has no other choice but to listen.
"What the fuck is that," Stan questioned a little horrified, confused? He couldn't tell, cause he actually gave two shits. But this looked outta the ordinary of the ordinary. If that even makes sense.
There was a seagull looking mutation with what it seems like a rats feet. For a second there he was worried his father accidentally caught man bear pig's kid.
"It's the Tergrity farms mascot!," He exclaimed even more excited taking out a board outta nowhere, explaining his new strategy.
Oh. So that's that.
"Yeah, bye," said lastly, in a flat tone, no longer caring about the rest before returning outside.
Stan was not gonna get involved, no matter how bizarre and crazy his dad's Karen episodes get, he told himself for the millionth time that same day. He was NOT getting involved.
[...]
"For fuck sake dad! What did you do!?," He shouted confused by the change of event, being tied in a chair was far from the plans he had for this evening.
"Uh.. well, let's say it a TEGRITY strategy," Randy smiled commercially, clearly seems nervous. Clearly fucked up. The latter frowned from that response.
Stan sighed, "okay. What did you do," he asked again, finally had calm himself and processed the situation he's in. No pizza night at Tolkien's tonight he said to himself.
"Well, remember my mascot?,"
He nodded, ofcourse he did, it all happened today.
"Well turns out he's like, related to chutulu."
Stan wanted to grip his nose outta frustration again, so bad, after hearing that, "what?," he asked again. As he couldn't believe that thing was related to.. unfuckin' believable. Actually it was definitely believable.
"Yeah, I don't know how'd it happened but he found out and wanted to massacre me and my farm, can you believe that! I even offered some of my weed," said exhausted while having a pout face as a child being scolded.
"Okay, so how the hell did we end up being tied up?."
"Stan, there's a bunch of cult members in south park," he stated obviously while he rolled his eyes by being questioned this much. But he still bother to answer, "those motherfuckers knew chutulu wanted us so they found us, knocked us and tied us up, as their way of worship. We're pretty much a sacrifice."
"But why me!?," he stated bitterly as he was NOT trying to get involved today.
"Because you are, Stan! I told you about my strategy did I!?."
"I left!?."
They bicker a bit more before Stan decided to speak out for a solution.
"Look, I think, I have a plan. You know Cartman?."
"Your fat friend? What about him?."
"Well, he manipulated chutulu to join he's superheroe team awhile ago. Thing is, if we get Cartman, maybe he can help us."
"Isn't he like, a dick?."
"It's complicated. Let's just find a way outta of these ropes."
"Easy." Randy picked out of his pocket shirt with his mouth some weed and light it up with his feet and a lighter he had in his pants. And burned the ropes. He then untied him.
"You could've done that all this time!?," exclaimed baffled by his father's stupidity once again.
"No time Stan!," he said while he ran into the depths of the woods with the boy following behind.
Yes, they were in the woods. Let's move on.
[...]
Kenny found himself running like a mad man, he did not mean to provoke the dark lord, but he did. He just wanted answers about his curse! Was that too much to ask?
But here he was, regretting kicking one of those big claws of him after being bluntly ignored by chutulu, it seems it was looking for something. He assumed it was Cartman as he couldn't link the others with it. That fat fuck. What did he do!?
He couldn't bare die today as he was not aware how far chutulu would detroy the town by tomorrow. He needs to know why it's here, and ofcourse, his curse! Cause it seemed no one cares besides himself! Fuck!
He dodge one of chutulu lasers that ended destroying a car near by.
He hid in one of the markets from town, as if that's gonna make a difference. Then he saw him. That fat fucker! He was with Kyle and Butters in the meat section. Both seemed to be arguing about something while the blonde hold a riffle nervously watching the two, he'd care less right now about whatever those two were arguing about.
"You son of a bitch!," He slammed cartman into one of the freezer, Cartman looked at him with opened feared eyes, "what did you do!?."
"K-kinny..!?."
"Woah, dude, calm down," said, Kyle, "what's going on?."
" 'What's going on?'," he responded incredulous, "chutulu's out there destroying the town and killing countless souls! That's what going on!."
"Oh," Butters said not being so stoked about it.
"Yeah, we kinda know that, asshole," the brunette said casually loosing his grip.
"Eric thinks that chutulu may be here because of a mission," Butters explained.
"Oh really," the blonde said sarcastically eyeing him, "Cartman why the fuck did you summon chutulu here!? Do you know all the damage you've done."
"Excuse me? I didn't do shit, kinny!," Cartman exclaimed offended, by being accused so surely.
Yeah, he has committed various, and I mean, VARIOUS crimes, but he did NOT do this. Though he must admit to himself that this turn of events could be convenient for him to destroy DikinBaus. As no one in this stupid town does not deserve such a wonderful magnificent place. That HE made. And as such rightly deserves it and rightly could destroy it if he wanted to, right?
"Like I'm gonna believe whatever shit comes from your mouth, fatso," Kenny stated.
"It's true." Kyle spoke up, "what Cartman said.. look, I've been following this asshole since he said he was gonna try to do something about that dumb hotdog place, so, I followed him around-"
"Like and stalker," bluntly added Cartman.
"And-" Kyle continued, ignoring cartman's comment before frowning, "the only thing he's done is shit on Butter's porch and purchasing 200 hotdogs in hopes DikinBaus will run out and shut down. Which is the most ridiculous thing I've ever witnessed–"
"Oh c'mon, Kyel it was brilliant!," Cartman defended his stupidity, "it's easy an effective! I buy all the hotdogs, open my own stand and start a business," finalizing while crossing his arms. Kyle look at him angrily.
Nobody will question where he got the money to pay for all those hotdogs. Most likely in a fraudulent way. Whatever it doesn't matter.
"You ate all the hot dogs, fatass!!."
Cartman frown finding a better comeback, "well..! Atleast I have hot dogs!."
"What?," Kyle responded simply with one eyebrow upward.
"Tsch, whatever. I have a new better plan that I won't be sharing to either of you assholes."
Kenny, snapped. He had enough of this bullshit.
"Guys! Chutulu!?."
"Oh yeah, yeah," Cartman had his arms up. A freaked Kenny is a scary Kenny, "uh, what about him?," he added.
"Really?," he asked again incredulously, not waiting for an answer he continued, "something or someone must have summon the dark lord. We need to find a solution to get him out."
"Dude, that's chutulu. Even if we wanted to do something what can we do about it?," Kyle added skeptical.
"Yeah, it's not like this shitty town deserves to be saved anyways," Butters stated, still a little bitter about having to spend community service cleaning the mess the towns people made just cause he was seen as a sex offender for pinching a girl who he thought had no green on San Patrick's day!
"Well. Cartman?," Kenny asked staring deeply into Cartman's eyes. For some odd reason he felt a connection with the boy. As if his eyes had a glint of something.. he just couldn't recall what it was.
"How would I know?," Cartman asked confused, and kinda annoyed that he hasn't even started his plan B because of an overdramatic Kenny.
"You manipulated chutulu you fat fuck! Do it again," He exclaimed frustrated of the whole thing now looking at the other boys. He's finding all of these unnecessary scenarios being unfold overwhelming. Nobody seems to care, nobody seems to care about chutulu destroying south park, maybe he doesn't care!?
He sigh. Maybe he really doesn't. Maybe all this is an excuse to find out about his curse shield with the idea of being heroic. Screw that. He cared! This town may be fucked up but it was his home! Our home! They must care!
"Okay, I got a plan," Kenny stated finally after a brief silence.
[...]
Cartman found himself frowning angrily standing in the middle of the street, in a kitty costume. He would've rather just picked his coon costume but Kenny stated it'd be more effective and he was definitely trying to mess with him once again, cause he found it hilarious.
Stupid kinny.
The other three boys were hiding behind a dunked car near by him. Not like it'd make a difference. Always put Cartman in the more risky messy situations! Ofcourse he was convinced with a reward if things goes well, not because he's scared of Kenny and he was being a pussy! It was the reward he was promised of!
He heard Kenny snicker a bit, stupid kinny. He finds this amusing didn't he!? Asshole.
He then was faced with the giant dark lord with each step the ground rumble and the buildings breaking and weakening by him.
He gulped. He's done this before, he can do it again. Why is he nervous this time?
Both pair of eyes met. Time for action.
"Miaw Miaw! If it isn't one of my best pals! Miaw miaw!," he then climbed in one of chutulu's feet to his head. My gawd he deserves a reward for this acting. He then pursued on scratching the lord's head as he enjoyed the sensation of the fake claws on his skull, "who's my precious chutulu?," he then added a purr distracting the giant.
The three boys started preparing the trap they had made while upon seeing cartman's manipulation was once again, working. That fucking fatass.
Kyle was trying to knot the rope to one of the polls light but end up falling backwards in the sight of chutulu, who immediately put it's attention on the redhead. Great, just fucking wonderful.
Chutulu immediately turned his attention to Kyle and growled once knowing damn well this was set up.
"Dammit jew!," Cartman shouted making it more obvious that this in fact was, indeed a setup.
'Twack!'
Chutulu looked behind him as he had felt a tiny rock hit his tail.
"Stan?," Kyle said confused. Once Stan and his dad we're visible with some hunting gear on and some guns in there hands.
This was not going as plan. And once again Kenny sigh frustrated. He wasn't sure if the new pair of characters were a good thing or not. He's gonna let it slide this time.
Randy slowly approached chutulu leaving behind Stan, who just cautiously watched.
He then took out a weird mutant goose rat thing from behind his right arm.
Chutulu raised a brow. If that's even possible, but it was. Ofcourse it was.
Chutulu looked down as the mutant thingy went to his side rubbing himself against it's feet. It was heartwarming if it weren't for the situation they were put for and who it was. Then Chutulu did the imaginable, he squashed it.
Stan and Randy looked stoked.
"Well that does it," said Randy.
Both Marshes mouth agape, still looking at chutulu and now dead corpse.
And in splits seconds Kenny put himself in front of the two, standing in front of chutulu embracing his blonde hair exposing his face, he had taken his parka off. Glaring at the monster above. He have had enough.
"What am I?," he asked once more, "answer me now!."
"What's with this one?," Randy side eyed Stan, as he shrugged in response. Confused also.
Chutulu ignored him and approached Randy. Which jolted a bit nervous as he did not figure out what he did to anger the creature. If it wasn't his mascot than what?
He lowered his face to the man and quickly head bunked him to the side, hitting his body through a store window breaking into pieces.
"Dad!!," Exclaimed Stan, rushing in hurry to his father's aid. Noneless a idiot but still his idiot.
"Ow! I'm okay Stan.." the injured man reassured.
In a blink of an eyes the military had showed up and started attacking chutulu, bullets in and out angering the creature, he had put himself on it's feet again trying to block the bullets and attacking the attakers, Cartman still on the dark lord's head completely taken off guard as he was distracted with the dialog was then shot in the back 'ow!' falling off chutulu's head straight to the ground. He had broked his limbs and neck during impact. This anger chutulu even more, as for him kitty Cartman was like a pet.
Kyle and his other two friends had witnessed it. As he shouted, "¡Cartman!," he ran towards him caring less of the chaos around him.
"Fuck, he killed Cartman!," Kenny exclaimed as he approached the now what appears dead boy.
'There's no way'.
"Holy fuck!," said Stan from a far, he was still on his father's side but had witnessed it aswell.
Kyle was next to him analyzing the boy's wounds as he couldn't believe it.
"He's dead.." says Butters while having his mouth slightly agape standing next to Kenny watching the now corpse.
"You bastard.." whispered Kenny, he was staring at his so called best friend, lifeless eyes. It was definitely an odd sight.
"He can't be dead.." Kyle reassured griping into the boy's costume, "he just can't," he frowned.
Stan had already approached the scene as his father seem to had been well standing up not as injured.. or in this scenario dead.
He was also as stoked as the two other boys that were just standing there watching there fat friend laying there. Kyle was the only one on the ground gripping on to Cartman as if he didn't want to let go.
Kyle stared at him for a bit longer than he expected, his body had lost color, his half lidded lifeless eyes staring at him and his hands were cold.. this can't be happening. Cartman can't die. That's not possible!
Kyle with both his fist hit his friend's chest as hard as possible, anger. So much anger!
"Cartman! Can't! Die!," hitting him more times with no intention, it just felt right.
"Woah, dude," Stan put a hand on his best friend's shoulder trying to calm him down he's never seen his friend act this way. And to be honest he never expected to see Cartman this way either. Lifeless.
Kyle smacked Stan's hand off him still in disbelief.
"¡Cartman! Cartman!," he shouted almost in a cry, desperation in his voice," you fat fuck! Wake up!," he again hit as many times as he could, in the dead one's chest.
"Dude, Kyle.. he's gone," Stan said in the most pity voice. As if he could feel what Kyle felt.
"No he's bullshittin' he's fucking bullshitting, Stan!," He said almost as he's trying to believe it himself, he felt himself shake, his eyes felt watery.
A big thump caught their attention leaving the other boy kneeled to the other not leaving his side. He could now care less about that fucking dark lord and this stupid chaotic town!
"You fat fuck...!" he whispered more to himself as he closed his eyes and clenched his fist.
He may hate Cartman, and may have countless times told him that's he's better off being dead. But he really didn't mean it. If Randy can be alive, if Garrison can be alive, if man bear pig can be alive.. then why can't him? It's only fair. Two of those people he mentioned are assholes in there own fucked up way, but have done countless crimes and gotten away of being a dick atleast man bear pig is a wild satanic creature it makes sense if he kills thousands of lives. But those two other bastards are here! Free, alive.. So can Cartman!
"Cartman..?," he said choked as he felt steaming tears fall down his cheeks as he watched his fat friend laying down breathless, no bicker response. No insults. Nothing but flat silence from his part. His death even seems painful, not the typical peaceful dead look, just plain painful.
[...]
As the day ended things went back to normal as per usual, well almost.
Kenny never thought he'd find himself sitting in a funeral of one of his best friends. It was always the way around. For some reason it felt wrong. That he was supposed to be in that box and not his friend.
His mother crying on the side of the casket while some of the south park parents tried to comfort her, but failed. As she was never that close to them anyways. Besides, deep inside she knew no one would fully understand what she feels as she knows her son wasn't the best of person's. And that probably there were people from this town who'd want this or asked for this. But she? She saw the evil in him and had gotten tired of his stupid schemes but that was still her little boy and she will always be his mother. And that won't ever change, so the pain will always remain there. And everyone else was an hypocrite in her eyes.
The four boys remain silent, listening to the ceremony behold them. Yes four boys, as for now that Cartman would no longer partake in their group they added Butters in his place.
"So, do I like have to act like an asshole now?," Butters asked grabbing their attention.
"Uh no?," Stan answered.
"Well if I'm gonna take Eric's place I think I should like try to act like him, like when you guys once choose Clyde because he was the second fat boy of our class..?"
"No Butters, you don't have to act like Cartman," Stan stated now a little annoyed, this wasn't the place or time to discuss something like this when their friend hasn't still been buried. It kinda stings.. this feels fresh. It is fresh. Who knew this fat fuck would affect him?
"Are you sure?."
"For fuck sake Butters, shut up!," Kyle exclaimed angrily, receiving a couple of odd stares from some of the other people there. He cared less to be honest. He clenched his fist as he wanted so bad to punch his face and beat him up. As he'd normally just do with Cartman. Cartman..
Cartman, Cartman, Cartman..
He looked down to his feet avoiding his friends gaze.
[...]
Two days have pass, and honestly this Butters thing just wasn't working. Stan wondered if he truly would prefer having Cartman back than having to witness a whimp like Butters attempt to be a douchebag loser. Don't get him wrong, Butters can be a douchbag but he can't get into Cartman's level. Even if he tries to be. Maybe that's what Butters doing wrong? He's attempting to be someone he's not when he can easily be himself as a douche. But still, not Cartman.
For much of Stan's surprise, south park still hasn't changed a bit after his friend's passing. It's still chaotic, and bizarre. And as hard to admit it even feels longer and even torturous. New characters appear here and there, some were dicks, others were plain awful, some just bland boring ass people. He couldn't believe it, he's actually starting to miss him, as these other characters just feel forced to continue continuity when it's just full filling!
It's just two days. Two fucking days. He's been longer than that with out seeing his fat friend and he's okay with it, even thankful, and yet knowing he won't ever be seeing him because he's dead just changes things.
Let's not even talk about Kyle. Out of the the three. Yes, he's not counting Butters. Fuck Butters!
Kyle has been the most affected. Ofcourse he also has to witness the cringey attempts of their idiotic blonde friend, trying to become his new "arch-rival" as that comes in the packaging of being Eric Cartman. Including being a selfish, manipulative piece of shit. Anyways, point is, to be Eric Cartman you must also hate Kyle Brofloski. And Butters just doesn't have it in him to fully hate on someone or just give him the time of day Cartman would normally do daily, actually obsessively to Kyle.
So here he was, on one of the seats of the school buss behind Kenny and Butters, hearing Butters trying to bicker Kyle. It really feels surreal.
"So, Kayl."
"It's 'Kahl', if you're trying to mimic Cartman atleast do it right," he responded back with an added eye roll at the end.
"Well, geezz.. I mean Ay! Shut up you dumb jew! I'll do and say what I want, whenever I want!."
Well, now that's actually better. Stan actually had to repressed a laugh cause he actually found that funny.
"Wow, Butts you're getting better," complimented Kenny.
Butters beamed and stared at Kyle, who silently watch another kid entering the bus. He really did not bothered putting his attention on the blonde.
"C'mon Kyle, you must admit that was pretty good," He tune in, trying to get Kyle to loosen up.
"Yeah.. I suppose," Kyle then looked up at Butters while the other just looked back nervously. Kyle sigh, "can you fight?" he then added with a glint of mischief while the other two boys stared at Kyle, confused for the sudden change in demeanor. Butters looked a little uncertain on what to answer.
As he should, this is Kyle we're talking about.
"O-ofcourse I do!," In fact, Butters does know how to fight, just not Kyle, never Kyle.
"Great, meet me up after school in the playground," said finalized while standing up to get off the bus.
"Ah geez.." Stan heard Butters whispered before getting off the bus to join his friend.
He didn't know what Kyle had planned, but he sure wants to find out.
[...]
"Oh geez! I don't think I can be Cartman no more!," exclaimed Butters with a couple of bruises in his face, tired, "Kyle was beating me up like a butcher to its meat selection!."
"Well that is Cartman's job to deal with y'know," Stan added. He figured this must be a way for Kyle to get rid of Butters. So he followed along.
"Yeah dude, if you're gonna be Cartman. You must know that you have to become Kyle's personal punching bag," Kenny tune in, actually enjoying the laugh. He knew we were all messing with him. Cause in fact, it seems Stan was not the only one bothered by Scotch.
"Oh Jesus!."
"Man, actually I do believe you can become Cartman, even better. As you seem to be more capable of taking Kyle's moods," yeah, we can be assholes sometimes. Stan smiled a bit.
"Oh boy.." he was not liking what he was hearing. Before adding anything further Kyle approached the group, tuning in with a happy humming.
"Hey there guys," he then glared at Butters, "Butters."
"AHHHHHH!!!," He scream while dashing out of there before adding, "Screw you guys I'm going home!."
"Well, that does it," Kyle shrugged.
"Guess no one can deal with you more than a day," Kenny added.
"I guess so."
"So now what?," Stan questioned. Everything just went silent.
Normally Cartman would suggest some stupid shit, we'd shit on first before following through with it. But even the substitute bailed on us, so we must figure it out on our own.
"Board games..?," Ken then added.
"Nah, done that yesterday," Kyle replied, tapping his foot on the ground, kinda impatient, kinda bored.
"What about basketball," Stan suggested. Once again the three boys remain silent. The wind whistling in their ears as they thought harder and the space between them felt thicker as they become smaller. And smaller, and smaller..
"Who wants to try summoning Cartman with a ouija?," Kenny added plainly, while pursuing on leaving the area to his place, with the certainly the others would followed.
In fact, not only did they follow, they were eager for it.
[...]
-In Hell-
"Dammit! no barbecue at sight in the most hottest place between three worlds!," Cartman exclaimed baffled.
He's been a hell citizen for two days now, and it has sucked. He isn't even allowed to go in the cool clubs cause he was a minor and would be forever be one for eternity! He did enjoy the public torture that was embrace there but besides that, nothing too outta the ordinary he could see up in south park.
He sigh, not knowing what to do, with out his friends to annoy, death feels empty. Boring as fuck! He wants to get outta here!
When he approached a counter were there were two men talking about some country song while drinking martinis, he decided to sit next to them. They immediately stayed quiet as his presence disturb them. 'Dumb bitches' he thought.
"So... how can we get out?," he asked.
"Excuse me?,"
"Yeah, like how do we get out from hell."
"Oh, why the hell do you want to get out?."
"Because it's boring as fuck, i want to live!."
"Well, he is young, George," one of the men side eyed his companion. The other nodded in agreement.
"Well there's no way, young boy," one of the men answered, I'll call him number two. Pftt, number two, get it? Hahaha! He repressed a laugh and continued trying to get more information outta the two grown men.
"Okay, but like there must be atleast someone who COULD know a way outta here, right?," he digged.
"Hmm.." number one begin thinking, pftt.. number one, "actually I believe there is."
Getting the boy's attention, he leaned forward as if it'd help him hear them any better. They were both drunk as fuck. For what it appears. Their talk was all gibberish, but 'anything to get out of here' he said to himself.
"You should look for the 'dark red soul'."
"The 'dark red soul'..?," he murmured.
"Yup, he lives in the coast side, just follow the direction signs and go to the yellow hotel. And just ask for him, someone must know where exactly he lives at, he's quite a party goat," number two explained chugging the bit of martini he had left.
So that, he did, he followed the directions signs that lead him to hotel 'jak n off' it was yellow, that's all he cared about. This asshole better know how to get out or he'll make sure he'll make himself a new bowl of chili.
[...]
"Oh, looking for red man?."
"Sure? Is that dark red soul?," he asked not very sure if it's the same guy he was told of.
"Yeah, that's his party animal name. Follow me."
'Tch, lame.' But he did follow. This tall freckle man took him to a long dark alleyway, he was feeling skeptical at first but then remembered he couldn't die if he was already dead. It's like respawn. Sigh. He remembered when he first came here, he fell in some spikes down a lava-fall (waterfall) he also remembered how painful it was but how quick he repawn back. So all is new.
The man enter a dark room and turn on the lights.
"Yeesh!!," some rookie exclaimed angrily as he was caught in a very peculiar position with a lady friend. Both naked.
"The fuck man!?," the red head turned his gaze down looking at the chubby boy.
His eyes widen as the latter.
"Dad..?" his mouth slightly agape. He couldn't fucking believe it. Out of all things. Out of all people. It was him.
Back then he would've dreamt of finding his dad, feeling complete and happy. But once he knew about what the town hid from him what HE hid from him, he just became bitter with the idea of ever having a father figure in the picture. He figured it would've weakened him and it was for the best to had never encountered or meet him. Cause he hates feeling weak. Cause he isn't.
They both looked at each other for a long brief silent second.
The other two people that were in the room left them, well more like the other dude stole his companion.
"Uh.. 'dark red soul'..?" he added, uncertain what to say. The boy felt his legs wobble and his lip twitch. While the older man had his left eye twitch instead.
"Yeah.." Jack answered quietly.
They were both put in a very awkward situation.
"..Eric huh?.." He then added when he received no answer. He wasn't use to having someone who didn't listen to him. Noneless a son who doesn't. Scott was always so eager to answer him even with the most smallest things. Man, he really missed his boy.
"You know my name?," the boy answered too quickly than he expected. He cough nervously, "ofcourse you do, I'm Eric Cartman," he boost his ego. More like a cover up of his insecurities at the moment.
Jack lighten up a bit at the comment. Indeed he knew about the trouble maker he was, well the trouble in general, everyone in south park knew. The son of a single crackhead whore mother, a whore he slept with.
"I see you're quite a confident one," he said cheeky before nudging the boy.
Cartman jolted by that action. Skepticism was basically like his middle name. That type of gesture is uncalled for and unnecessarily. And it made him feel uneasy for some reason.
"Yeah..right," he decided to ignore the remark, "okay so.. I heard you know how to get me back to south park?."
"Oh, so that's why you're here?," then he realized that the only reason the boy is presented here was because of the inevitable, he died in the upper world.
Maybe it's his instincts, or just maybe because he's been so lonely. He feels this sudden sickening attachment towards the boy. As messed up as it sounds, considering he did ground him into chilly. But in his defense he didn't know. He didn't know he was his father. Would've that made a difference? That he couldn't know. But that made him soften just a bit. That would keep him fooled just for now.
"Yeah, I want to get back home," Cartman stated, as the tense moment had started to drift off coming to a lighter ambient.
"Oh, well I suppose I could help you with that," he lied. He saw Eric's eyes sparkle a bit, as in hope. It remind them so much like Scott's..
"Sweet!," he exclaimed excited. Finally, this literally hell will be over soon.
[...]
"So you're saying you own that hotel?," Cartman asked. As his father explained most of his living down in hell and his ropes in it.
They headed to a taco stand and Jack gesture him to take a seat in one of the chairs while he order.
"Pretty much. Cool huh?," he responded a little proud of his accomplishments.
"Yeah.. so.. 'jak n off'?," Cartman asked while he saw the waiter place their beverages in the counter.
"Haha yeah.. I thought it'd be funny. No one seems to care," he added with a chuckle, taking a sip of his soda.
"Ha.. I- when I was in the upper world me and my friend kinny started a business reopening a old hot dog restaurant and we named it 'DikinBaus' haha.. just to mess around with people," he admitted, strangely still feeling uneasy and nauseous.
"Ha! 'DiknBaus'? I love it!," Jack laughed a bit whipping a fake tear out of his right eye, "I guess we share a certain humor, Eric."
"Yeah.." he look down at his hands. It felt odd talking to his dad. He wasn't sure if it was good but he knew it wasn't unpleasant.
"So you also have a business?," Jack asked interested. His boy does resemble him in ways he won't deny that, though his slut of a mother's features were surely there, all over his face to be in fact.
Scott never seem interest in taking big steps on trying to climb to the top leagues or have big ideal dreams. He seemed okay with living in the low peaceful life and well, following his favorite bands gushing over there new songs as a fellow follower than a leader.
"Well. Turns out they took it away from me when it became one of the most popular places in town! Can you believe that?," he complained, finally letting loose the awkward tension he felt, to vent his anger and displeasure, "and what's worse is that my mom followed through with it and didn't care that we had a lifetime successful business with a cool looking house!."
"That sounds awful, your mom's a bitch," Jack admitted. He can already tell Eric can have a bright future as a business man if he we're to try harder.
The boy jolted. It anger him when anyone talks bad about his mom, maybe Jack can be an exception being his dad and all?.. but it still pinch his heart and left a sour feeling in the tip of his tongue. Yes, his mom's a bitch, but only he can say it. He really doesn't know how to respond to his dad about it.
"Right.." he then continued sipping his soda, "so, how did you manage to create one of the most popular hotels in hell?," ignoring further his mother's mentioned.
"Well, when I was down here I was very popular among the other people that had also previously died. I stood out in a way."
The food had already been served. And Cartman picked one of the bean tacos and starting munching it, he felt his father's stare on him and he felt conscious of how he was eating 'Do I have something?'.
"Really? What made you so different?," oblivious to the other stares he was getting from the other customers.
"My death," He bluntly admitted, making Cartman almost choke on his food. 'Fuck'
"Oh," he flatly stated.
"Yeah, it was a hit back then. Everyone was talking about it, and people glorified me for it. As they say it was one the most radical deaths they've had ever heard happening," Jack explained, smiling by the memory, he found himself oddly proud of it. As it had benefited him in so much, and honestly he liked the attention on him, "As to expected I was very popular and was given many opportunities, like talk shows and lots and lots of 'money'," said emphasizing the last word.
Cartman stared at him for brief seconds, "money?," hint of greed in his words. Jack smiled by that, and nodded. He sure was his son.
"So.. how did you die?," he finally asked that anxious question he's been wanting to know.
"So like, I was kinda forced to help my annoying friends out to bring back chutulu to the underground, even though I didn't want to and wanted to just use chutulu to destroy 'DikinBaus' as because no one deserves such a wonderful place I made, and I was shot by the military by accident while I was on top of chutulu's head, falling straight to the ground," Cartman answered casually, squeezing some ketchup on his plate mimicking the blood he imagine leaving, sparing the costume details and the manipulation tactic he use too.
"Wow, I guess us Tenenorman just have it in us on dying radically and cool," Jack laughed excited with a fist in the air.
The name used took Cartman off guard. He was a Cartman after all! But it really warmed his heart to be complimented that much and it felt nice, being included for once. So he let it slide just this once.
"Yeah, I guess it is!," He exclaimed more confident and puffed his chest out, proud.
Jack gave him a warm smile and Cartman returned it back.
[...]
Jack had went on asking for some books he claimed as 'solutions' for Cartman's problem, while the boy decided to sit back and rethink his choices of the chilly incident and how different it would've been if they had just told him the truth.
Then, he felt a odd buzzing sound inside of his ear. He started smaking his left side with his palm.
"Cartman!," he.. 'was that Stan?', "Dude can you hear us? Are you there?."
'Holy shit, it is the hippie!'
"Stan?."
"Fatass?," another familiar voice chimed in.
"Aye! I Ain't fat you stupid jew!."
"Holy shit, Cartman dude!," Stan exclaimed a little too excited then he wanted to be. Cartman flinched by the intense noise in his ears, it was bothering him.
"Ow! Aye you damn hippie! Lower your voice will yah! My head hurts just hearing you guys!."
On the other side Kyle couldn't hold a smile. The other boys just laughed by being able to still annoy Cartman even being in a whole different life.
"So how's it going over there, Eric," Kenny asked.
"Yeah, you haven't lost ten thousand pounds over there by not eating junk food all day?," Kyle added, knowing well Cartman would answer back by the remark he leaned forward to the magic ball that was centered in the middle of the ouija.
"In the matter of fact, you dumb jew, I'm eating pretty well," The boy answered with puffed cheek and airs of superiority, "But things are going pretty well, it's boring as fuck though I was trying to find a way outta here," he then added. Not even questioning how they even managed to connect with him.
"And how's that going, Cartman?," Stan asked curiously. He really wanted to know if there was way.
Cartman took a few seconds to rehear his friend's question. He considered it a bit. After all, he was starting to find hell quite less boring now that he found his dad. He was not going to admit that to them though.
"Uh- well, I'm still on it. Not much luck though," he lied.
"Dammit Cartman, you fat fuck you really can't do shit with out us can you," Kyle then added, smirking slightly.
"Aye!."
The three boys started howling of laughter.
"Eric?."
Eric jolted in shock by the sudden voice behind him, reappearing to his vision. He reposition himself.
"Everything alright?," Jack answered a little concerned of his son behavior just now. He had just returned with some books at his hold while he witnessed Eric seemingly talking to himself.
It was nothing new to him that his son was mentally fucked up, so he has decided to shrug it off.
"Yeah, everything's alright."
'Who's that, fat boy?,' Stan asked.
"No one.." Cartman answered in a whisper.
"C'mon, Eric. Let's go to my place and discuss about your situation," Jack added with a nod gesturing to follow him.
Eric then pursued on following behind him.
[...]
"I guess we lost connection with Cartman," Kenny stated. As they no longer could hear their fat friend.
"How long will it take for us to be able to contact him again?," Kyle asked a little eager. He was finally being able to enjoy the presence of Cartman again, and honestly it was hard to admit he did miss it.
"Probably tomorrow," the blonde shrugged laying down on his bed, "maybe we should try asking the goths if they know how to bring a person back from the depths of hell."
"That sounds like a good idea," Stan chimed in.
The three were now determined on bringing Cartman back.
On the other side, Cartman found himself admiring his father's pent house. It had one of the most amazing views of hell. He stared at the window for a brief long period while seeing every store, house, streets, even the small from afar hell citizens.
And don't get him started on his gaming room! There was also a personal gym 'meh' who gives a damn about exercise. He continued looking through the home. Big kitchen, bathroom, room.
Wow, literal heaven.
There was a box full of condoms on one of the kitchen counters which his dad immediately hid when he found the boy inspecting the area.
He followed behind him with his arms cross on his back, he liked how much Eric was admiring his success with those big innocent looking eyes, though he knew deep inside that image, he was a little devil just like his mother. Both innocent looking yet easy to sugarcoat someone into giving them what they want, making them devilish.
He remembered venting with pride to his son Scott about being a Denver bronco and the games his won, all the attention he received because of it looking for praise from him, but received none but a small nod while he presided on listening to music. Maybe because he was a teen and no longer interested in hearing about their parents accomplishments and tales.
But Eric, oh small little Eric found everything he did amusing and exciting! He enjoyed that.
"Okay, uh.. Jack?," the boy spoke, uncertain what to call him.
"You can call me dad," The redhead added too quickly, he 'tsch' silently.
It went silent again. Jack figured it'll be a matter of time for things to settle down and fix on it's own.
Cartman had his mouth slightly agape staring at his father trying to pick on any slight hint of bluff in him. But found none. 'No one wanted to be his dad' no one dare tried to be.
Jack was starting to feel a little uncomfortable 'maybe it was too soon?' Before the boy spoke up.
"O-okay, dad," he said with a flat line as his mouth.
That word just felt so cursed coming out of his mouth.
Jack beamed.
[...]
A whole week has passed and the boys were no longer able to contact Cartman. Kyle began to worry if something must have happened to his idiotic friend while in search of an exit from hell.
They had failed miserably to summon Cartman back. Tried the various forms the goths have told them to do. But nothing worked. And now they had lost the only connection they had towards him, Cartman was just too much to bring back he supposed.
Stan had suggested that it may be because he was too fat to fit in any of the portals made. He found that funny cause it was most likely to happen.
He sigh.
The boys decided to just start looking for a new replacement. As they had already gripped on the idea on the other boy's return being less possible.
So here he was. Being the one chosen to pick the new Eric Cartman.
"So why again do I have to pick him?," he asked with a frown expression, having cupped his cheek with the palm of his hand.
"Because, the new Cartman has to be able to keep up with you," Stan stated the obvious.
Kyle raised a brow by that, "What's that supposed to mean?."
"It means, that if he were to be put in a stupid situation where he pissed you off enough to riled you up, then he must be able to budge through with it."
"Doubt it," He said bored. He wasn't interested in finding a new Cartman, he wanted his Cartman back. Their Cartman back.
"Okay, kid. You got the rules?," Stan questioned, eyeing a brunette chubby boy. His name was Tobias. The boy tilted his head not as sure.
"So.. I just can't fight back?," he asked displeased, wrinkling his nose. 'Kinda like cartman' Kyle thought.
"No. You fight back in a sketchy scheme to bite back at Kyle," Kenny explained balancing a pencil with his mouth, "you just let Kyle beat you up."
"But- that's not fair! How can I just let this dude just beat me up?."
Kyle was just standing next to him eyeing the boy. Already annoyed by this interaction. A good start he supposed.
"Dude, it's Kyle you just-" Stan gripped the bridge of his nose to calm himself down, "look, you be an ass, then Kyle beats you up for it. Get it? That's how their dynamic works."
Still not reassured by the answer the boy looked at Kyle in a stance for a fight.
Kyle then did a stance, about to prepare punching the kid. But before even giving him a throw, the boy flinched and cover himself up with his arms.
"Damn, what a pussy," Stan said.
"Ay! I ain't no pussy!," he shouted, his fist were clenched, and his cheeks were red with embarrassment, frowning his face.
"Go on," Kenny tune in, finally fully focusing on the boy, an eye brow raised.
"W-well.. you guys are a bunch of assholes! Fuck you guys!."
"Okay, okay," the blonde boy raised his hands, grinning from ear to ear, "and what am I?," he closed his eyes putting a hand in one of his ears waiting for the correct answer.
"A poor piece of shit!," the boy in question exclaimed, "you're a stupid hippie. That only -" he points at Stan. And continued bashing on all three of us.
Stan and Kenny were grinning widely while Kyle felt a little sting is his chest.
They found their Cartman.
[...]
Cartman on the other hand had been laying down on the living room couch, with a very thin blanket as the environment he was in was already quite warm. Atleast for what his father had explained to him. The weather is only based on just two season changes. Summer and 'winter'. Summer is burning hell, winter it's freezing hell as if it were wanting to snow in literal hell, but it never does. Ofcourse, they were in summer when he had arrived, and it'll be like that for the next eight months.
The TV was on and it was kinda late at night for what he supposed called 'hell hour'. Their night time.
His eyelids were half lifted, tired. He won't deny the first few days spending time with his dad we're great, with the exception of the crappy so called 'food' he made, it was just too.. let's say bland 'healthy'. Unlike his mom's amazing cooking nothing could compare. But he had adapted to it very quickly as Jack had promised him to go out for some yummy foods as a 'treat'. He supposed he could endure the torture for a couple more days as long as he was still able to play with all his video games.
But the more the clock ticks the more bored he gets, the more un-patience he gets. Jack also wasn't always home compared to his mother. He had work, and had explained to him this is how he owns such nice things and keeps things in check under 'their' rooftop. He was barely home, and not only that he'd come back with lady friends and takes them to bed with him, claiming they were there for business. What he's not aware of, is that he's already very familiar with the so called 'business' before. His mother has finally mellow down on it but this prick doesn't seem on ending it anytime soon as some college freshman.
He had guessed his former wife had ended up in heaven as she is no longer in the picture and the man never mentions her. Taking this as a opportunity to sleep around with as many women he could get, just like with his mother. He frown by the thought.
He sigh, as he knows better than to knock on the grown man's door. He knew he had taken a lady friend with him inside, he didn't even bother glancing at him before taking her inside. So he layyed there. In that silent room, all by himself hearing the TV noises slowly being blocked by his brain.
He missed south park.
He missed his friends, and his bitch of a mom.
He closed his eyes. And then he jolted back up.
'That's it!' He exclaimed to himself.
He went through all the pages of the books Jack had brought, claiming they could 'help' which he never bother bringing up again cause he was distracting Eric with other cool more interesting stuff than returning him back to South park. For Eric's surprise they were a bunch of cooking recipes 'nothing of actual use!', he frown angrily. 'That motherfucker!' Literally.
He quietly tip toe to another shelf and started going through each individual book but found nothing. He was getting desperate as he was wondering how could Jack keep that information from him when it was literally the whole reason he found him for.
Then, when he was about to give up a green book had ended up smacking his head 'ow!', it had fell from above the shelf. But there was something special about that book that made him peek inside. There was code written in the back part of the book. He wondered where to use it for but was immediately answered as he look at the front cover. It was the best hint.
He slowly open the front door to sneak out and successfully do so. He ran trough each hall way of that huge building and had entered the elevator tapping a button for the ground floor.
He waited patiently, and had entered the shallow hallway. The book was titled 'room fith'.
He open the room and for his luck, it was opened. Everything was empty, a plain green painted room. He stood there confused thinking in 'what' he had calculated wrong.
Before 'snap!' The ground open immediately letting him fall straight into some cushions. The fall didn't feel so deep. But the whole secrecy makes it all skeptical, as if there's something to hide.
He looked around the small room, it was adorned with many satanic symbols, candles, glasses with sand and there were plenty of papers spread in the floors like rituals. He examine each one and approach the table that had many finished and unfinished work. Building plans, maps from areas of hell he hasn't heard of. He figured this was all work of his father as he can recall his writing from the small notes he had left him in the counter before heading for work explaining how to use certain things of the kitchen and wishing him a 'have a nice hell day' before adding 'you're not allowed to go outside'. Kinda controlling not gonna lie.
He flipped through plans and saw many other rituals of summoning. Who knows, he may be able to summon Kyle here? He snorted of the thought of pissing his friend off by bringing him to hell.
But then stop his tracks when he looked under the table to find a small safe, his eyes widen at the revelation 'this is it! This is were he's supposed to add the code.'
"What're you doing there champ?."
He jolted scared turning into the opposite direction.
Jack was smirking slightly while having his arms cross.
"Guess you're enjoying the tour huh," he approached slowly stopping three steps away from Eric.
The boy gulped felling this huge uneasy felling between them, sweating uncontrollably. He felt small for the first time in his whole life, looking at the older man's eyes.
Before being knocked out.
[...]
He opened his eyes and felt his arms tied to a wooden surface unable to move, he notice once adjusting his vision that he was in fact tied up in a chair. He freaked out, this feels oddly familiar.
He then turned his gaze upwards looking straight ahead. Seeing his father sitting down in a couch from that same room, arms were cross around his chest, man spreading but his gaze was straight towards him. He gulped once more. 'He really looks like Scott right now'.
Jack immediately lightened up once he saw Eric awake, he then proceeded to speak.
"Oh, Eric you're awake!," he beamed, forcing a cheerful tone. He didn't want the boy to realize how disappointed he was for catching him trying to escape, "look, Eric, I'm not gonna hurt you," he tried justifying his actions while he stood up.
"You knock me out and tied me into a chair you crazy bitch!."
"BECAUSE someone decided to bash in a forbidden area," Jack defended, he disliked the naming but bit his tongue.
"Cause you lied to me of helping me get out! Those books you brought were all cooking recipes!."
"Well, yes, they will be of help once you're older, champ! I didn't lie," the red head continued explaining while searching through his drawer, "Eric I want you to know that I'm just doing this for the best for you."
The boy remained silent which gave Tenorman the opportunity to continue reasoning.
"I want you to be able to accomplish your goals, I want you to become successful and I want you to be able to follow my steps in hell."
"What? Fuck that! I don't want to be a business man!."
"Eric, I see so much potential in you and have no plans on letting you waste it like your brother."
Eric froze by the mentioned of Scott.
"Unless you'd prefer ending up living in a old dusty hotdog like your mother lead you too?," Jack said with a blank face showing a couple of prints that had many, and I meant many incidents involving Cartman, "When you first approached me, that same night I made a huge search and found so much information on you, Eric, so, so much. You're quite a special boy," he added with a little hum.
"Scott has lost all his marbles, and as hard it is to admit it. I don't see him giving a good name for the Tenormans."
"Fuck the Tenormans! I'm no Tenorman!."
"But you are, Eric," there was a glint of greed in those eyes, something that made Eric's skin scrawled, "in fact, you're more of a Tenorman than a Cartman," he took out a scrapbook from the left side of his drawer.
He flipped through it and stopped in one, deciding to show the boy what was in it.
It was a old newspaper with a young man, probably in his mid-thirties he had ginger looking features but it looked like him, a way older version of him. He had a smirk on while being dragged by cops in the picture, his features resemble pure chaotic vibes. You just knew by seeing a glance of this man, he was trouble.
The article had titled 'psycho man rigged presidential election'. Eric gulped again.
"That's your great grandfather," he then picked up another of his prints, "you know who also tried rigging a presidential election?," Jack added smirking while showing a picture of Cartman and the head of Disney along of millions of election votes.
He then showed him another article, he so called great grandfather was standing next to three other boys picking on one in peculiar, he supposed a friend. He seemed jewish as he had a star of david necklace on him. This article had nothing too chaotic on it, they just use those four teens as an example of 'what not to be'.
Then his dad showed him a picture of his three friends and himself. One where he was in fact, taunting his jewish friend.
He sigh.
"Okay? That means nothing! I want to get back home!."
"That's the thing, Eric, you're not," Jack said, calming placing delicately the scrap on top of the drawer, "I'm protecting you, by the evil of yourself, the evil of your great grandfather's soul on you and the evil of your mother's influence," he pointed, sitting back down comfortably in the couch.
"I'll actually put of good use of your skill and potentials, someone like you Eric should always waste their potential in something actually beneficial than to just fuck around with," Jack lit up a cigar while he continued his rant, "that's what your great grandfather did wrong, and that's what you're doing wrong. Putting your motives and desires into unbeneficial things, un important things. And for what? Just for a three second laugh before being dragged away to jail or to a 'pyscho ward'?," he denied with his head looking at his expensive shoes, smiling after emphasizing his last sentence.
"You mother fucker.." Eric murmured finally realized what the ginger meant, Jack smirked in understanding, "Scott.. he didn't just go crazy because of what I did, he was already going crazy before I enter his life I just pushed him forward to actually snap!," the boy exclaimed scared.
"Ding ding ding!," Jack nodded happily, "see, you're very smart."
Cartman really wanted to go, run away and hide himself under the warm covers of his bed, under his mother's care far away from this crazy bitch!
Jack had left claiming he'd get him some food.
There he was just sitting there afraid, he really prayed for a miracle, just one more miracle in literal hell!
He closed his eyes tight trying to imagine himself being just trapped in a really bad nightmare.
The boy found the switch in personalities amusing, as it were so sudden and unexpected. In a blink of an eye the man that was seen as a caring cool father turned into a crazy psychotic lunatic! He really started missing his mom.
He felt himself uncomfortable felling the ropes being sunken in his flesh, hurting him and he felt having cramps in his calves, it hurted like hell and he couldn't do anything about it. He began crying outta desperation.
Then, he felt a buzz in his ears once more 'guys?'
His eyes lit up.
"Is there someone there?," he asked sniffing his snot back inside as it was running down his mouth.
"Cartman?."
"Kyle?," the brunette boy smile, 'there was still hope after all!'
"Kahl! You gotta help me! Kahl!," the boy cried with no shame. It isn't unusual for him to seek help from his ginger friend when he had fucked up and needed help solving it, "I can't! I'm all tied up and I-I-! Bwaaahh!!!," he cried louder.
"Okay, Cartman calm down!," his friend responded, "what happened? Is everything okay?."
"No! Nothings okay you stupid fuck!," the chubby boy eyes were all puffed up and red, while he felt his throat dry up, "this fucker lied to me! He lieeed!"
"Who lied to you?," he didn't hear Kyle ask as he cut him off continuing explaining his current situation.
"I need help! I'm tied up in 'jak n off' hotel in room five the ground floor! I'm at the bottom!," He cried once again, between breaths he hold back tears, he was freaking out. He was scared, and he was alone.
Then snapped back nervously when he heard a door open from behind him.
"Hey, Eric. I got you some grilled cheese sandwiches in hopes for you to cheer up a bit, my little future super star," said Jack beaming mimicking his mother's tone, it had sent shivers down the boy's spine, "I don't want you gaining too much weight though, or you'll be seen as a piggy for the rest of your life. And no one, likes, pigs."
"Cartman? Are you still there? Cartman!?," he heard his friend's voice.
He remained silent not trying to reveal his last only solution outta this mess, blocking also Tenorman's hurtful words.
"Why Eric! Look at you, you look like a mess," Jack put the sandwiches aside while running to his drawer and taking out a box of tissues and wipes. He then approached the boy and started wiping his face. Cleaning all remaining leftover tears and the snot that had started to dry up in his mouth.
[...]
"Dude, how the hell are we gonna go find Cartman if he's in hell," Stan exclaimed confused about his best friend's claims.
"The only solution is one of us dying," Kyle said with a frown, determinant on finding cartman.
"Dude!?," the latter responded with a brow raised and his arms raised in 'wtf', "dude I don't want to die! There's so much I want to do" looking at the ground thinking about the thousands of board games he hasn't played yet.
"Yeah, me neither!," exclaimed, Tobias.
Kenny remained silent staring at the red head.
"No one has to die, but me," Kyle spoke, he lowered his gaze. He knew it was risky, "I'm offering myself to do it," but it was worth the shot.
"Kyle that's the most crazy shit I've ever heard you say!."
"It's the only way! Nothing else has worked!."
"No, I'll do it."
The three boys turned their head towards Kenny. He had a frown and he seemed to not fear losing anything. Cause he wouldn't.
Kenny had already tried getting back into hell, dying various times to see if he could find Cartman but for some reason he hasn't been able to get a hold of the underground world. Waking back to life the next day. As in some sorta temporary limbo.
"That's okay, Kenny," Kyle reassured with a smile," I know you have your siblings to care of.. and well, I know Ike would have my mom and dad to take care of him, just in case I don't come back."
"Kyle, I'll do it. Eric is my best friend after all," Kyle's words was heartwarming but he wasn't gonna risk losing another friend.
Kyle frown reconsidering it. He then proceeded to nod.
They had left the Marsh residence as they wanted to be as far as possible from any witnesses, they went inside the weed 'garden'.
They found a solid ground far away from the farm. Atleast enough for a bullet to not be able to hear from a distance.
They got into a circle and Kenny stood in middle of the three.
He took the gun out, and pulled the trigger with not even a second thought. But there was nothing, just a small click everytime he pulled the trigger.
"What the fuck?," the blond asked confused looking up at Kyle.
"Sorry, Kenny I couldn't let you do that," his friend stated before pulling out a gun out of his jacket and pointed at his head 'that crazy son of a bitch' Kenny thought eyes wide open in panic, "here goes nothing," 'BANG' was all he heard before hearing the other two boys scream.
"Kyle no!," Stan shouted with his hands gripped into his head staring at his now dead friend, his face covered in Kyle's blood, "Jesus christ!!."
"Holy fuck," the brunette boy said horrified, "you guys are crazy! I no longer want to be part of this stupid group!," he screamed horrified before dashing away no longer looking back.
[...]
"¡AHHH!," Kyle found himself screaming while falling straight into what it seems to be lava. He looked upwards meeting with a pair of people staring at him. Is he really in hell right now? Fuck, he needed to start behaving once he's back in south park. He got up and managed to get out of the pit with ease.
He looked around, people forming circles partying here and there. There was lights everywhere even though it was pretty much lit already. Stores, buildings even food stands. 'No wonder that fat fuck didn't complain about being hungry' he thought to himself. Hell didn't seem bad at all! Well with the exception of the public torture displayed in front of him, he didn't seemed to mind it as much as he felt he should. What the literal hell?
He went to what appeared to be a big wooden cartel for new hell residents with the instructions on how to get back in their feet and their new purposes and do's, 'fuck that', he went where there was a map with all the locations needed to know. Also, pamphlets. He picked one and opened it. He recall Cartman mentioning a hotel called 'jak n off' and pursued following the directions given.
He then stood in front of a yellow building.
Okay, first instruction checked. Now, room fifth of the ground floor. But he stopped before doing any further action. He recalled his friend claiming there was someone with him 'what if they're still there?' He thought before considering a different approach.
Meanwhile...
"Holy shit, Kenny! What do we do!?," Stan said in panic, gesturing the other boy's dead body.
"Okay, Stan. Just listen carefully," the blonde had his right hand as a 'stop' gesturing to calm down.
He saw his friend breathing heavily, closing his eyes trying to regulate his heartbeat and breathing.
'he's just a crazy as Cartman!' That realization made the boy's eyes widen, "Holy shit," He spoke, now gripping into Kenny shoulders while the other boy flinched by the sudden action, "that was just as crazy level as Cartman!," he exclaimed his concerns.
Kenny loosen up from the grip before picking Kyle's body from head to shoulder. He gesture with his head for the other boy to help him with the other half.
Stan hesitated a bit but followed through.
"Fuck."
[...]
"Hmhm hmm!," Jack nodded repeatedly when he had finished re-dressing his off spring. He had bought him a little business suite the other day but had found this time appropriate to give.
The boy had refused and complained when the man attempted to take his clothes off but then failed immediately from his strength. 'Something beneficial from being a Denver bronco' he thought. He proceeded to submit.
Once back tied in the chair, his father turned him around being front of a large mirror.
'Ofcourse he was handsome' but he did not like being force to do things against his own will.
"Eric Tenorman," the man spoke with pride, "doesn't that just sound right?."
Eric gulped. He hated that name.
"Look at you, looking like a professional business man already!," he beamed again, "I'll be right back I'm gonna go fetch some wine."
"When are you planning to untie me!?," the boy wince when he saw a spider slowly going down on him.
A laugh as it were a joke was made, "oh, Eric," he then walked out.
None long after he had heard a loud 'thump' from behind him, he looked instead in the mirror and his eyes widen of excitement.
"Kahal!"
"Cartman?," the boy asked while standing up, he had fallen down from the cushions, ass straight to the ground, "Holy shit, dude! You alright?," he asked approaching him, he proceeded to untie the boy.
Kyle looked around a bit and proceeded to look at the boy that was stretching his back. He heard some cracking and popping.
'He looked like shit'
"We have to get outta here!," Cartman said before dragging Kyle from hand to hand outta the dark room. He was grateful he manage to see how his father summoned a door. But he stopped returning to the safe and grabbing the book and papers that were in there, once again gripping onto Kyle's hands dragging him out.
Once they were safe. They had ran out of the building, running towards the entrance of hell through the amount of new people that had arrived, and found themselves hidden behind 'Sussie's Buttocks' club.
Cartman sigh and Kyle just watched him with a frown brow.
With out further warning Cartman hugged the boy tight leaving Kyle speechless tensing his shoulders and his hands were up in the air unable to figure out if to correspond or just let the boy finish. He decided the second option.
"Thank you, Kyle! You came! I can't believe it!."
The boy loosen up the tension he had felt on his shoulders and just kept silent, letting his arch rival embrace him with his warmth. He could feel Cartman's rapid heart beat.
"Just so you know, I'm just here cause I couldn't stand your replacement," he said finally getting out of the boy's grip.
"Ay! You guys replace me already!?," Cartman protested angry while pouting.
The ginger smirked. With out realizing he felt himself hugging the boy tight. 'Fuck, he actually missed him', he buried his head under Cartman's shoulders as he felt him tense.
Kyle then let go, gazing at Cartman who had his eyes widen and the most heated red cheeks, mouth agape 'he looked gay' he thought. The boy then proceeded to lean towards him causing Cartman to panic as he weakly slapped him backwards snapping him out to his senses.
"Okay so who are we hiding from?," the red head spoke while he dust off the dirt on his jacket.
"Jack Tenorman."
Kyle's attention back to Cartman, in shock, "your dad?."
He nodded before vomiting. Everthing was all so overwhelming. Everthing his father revealed, his great grandfather and how home sick he felt, how much he missed his friends and mom. His insides twisted as he felt shivers all over him.
He made sure to point at Kyle's seamlessly new shoes though
"Ow gross, dude!."
[...]
Kenny found himself desperately wanting to go to hell but no matter how much he tried, he just couldn't. As if there were something blocking him by going.
He sigh, legs crossed next to Kyle's rotten body, flies piling up around him. He and Stan had hid themselves in Randy's shed. They weren't certain if to burry him or not so they toss him in there while both took turns checking outside for any future witnesses which they failed miserably because Stan's dad had went for a quick smoke hidding from Sharon, and looked at them, glancing at both boys before looking at Kyle 'ohhh' he murmured, both brows were raised before closing the door slowly, leaving.
Kenny then took out the ouija board and place it in the ground. Might aswell try to contact Kyle.
"Any luck?," Stan asked wincing from the smell that was coming out of his best friend.
"No," Kenny tried cutting some more blood out of his wrist, carefully not making the wound any deeper. They needed a living mortal's blood to be able to contact the dead.
"Do you think he went to heaven?."
"Nah, man. You really think one of us will end up there after the amount of shit we've down?," he had went to heaven before but it was a one time thing, after he started simply caring less about his deaths he became bolder and is no longer admitted into heaven.
Besides he recalled Kyle unintentionally killing a bunch of Canadians that was enough reason to be sent to hell.
"Good point."
Cartman and Kyle found themselves looking through rituals and plans, they inspected the book while Kyle flipped through pages then stopped pointing at one.
"Here 'lay the one and only chosen one for the path to open, a bright light as blindfold being turned to one'," then continued reading the next paragraph, " 'the second gripped to life, will become sacrifice to give light as they are two'."
"What's that supposed to mean?."
"As they are two.." Kyle reread trying to add sense to what was written, brows knitted together, "that's it," He said looking at the drawings of two men one represented death, the other life. While life was seen switching places with death.
He flipped through the rest of the pages reading new paragraphs and prophecies.
'Misplace the two bounded souls and fear it's wrath between worlds, as they are one'
'Life and death which are shown to be bounded by a soul'
'Death is life, life is death, a curse forming in between them as the new bounded soul is created'
He flipped through the next page and eyes widen. It was a drawing of Kenny and Cartman. 'Holy shit'
"Did you find anything?," Cartman asked while laying down on his stomach, making paper airplanes with the loose pages that were spread on the floor as he had gotten bored.
"Well, there you are my special little boy."
Both boys gasped turning around while they got up, Kyle having gripped the book on his chest. He walked backwards placing an arm on Cartman backing away slowly shielding him
'Cartman was our way out' he told himself, justifying his actions as if it were the first time he found himself protecting the fat fuck. Which it wasn't.
Jack stood there with his arms crossed behind his back, grinning eyeing the book then looking back at Kyle.
"I see you brought a friend to play, Eric," he took a pistol out from the inside of his suite pocket.
Both dashed outta there running through the multiple people that were all formed in circles. Hearing Tenorman shout from a far 'Ay! come back here!'
'Like father like son'.
Kyle panted hardly while trying to grasp some air, Cartman was knocked out cold on the floor. Hopefully they were far enough from Tenorman.
A buzzing feeling in his ear caught his attention, he held it because of the intense pain it did as if that were gonna stop it. Blood trailing down his cheek he looked at the hand he had held himself with 'my ear is bleeding'.
"Kyle?," the boy in question jolted.
"Kenny!?"
"Dude finally! We were worried sick for you!."
"Is he there? Kyle? Are you there!? You crazy piece of shit! Jesus christ!," Stan chimed in," are you alright? Did you find Cartman?."
"Yeah, he's right here," he looked at the boy that was now trying to stand up. He offered a hand while the boy reached out and was pull up to his feet again. He looked tired, uncharacteristically tired. It gave Kyle an uneasy feeling as he remembered what he had read 'Misplace the two bounded souls and fear it's wrath between worlds, as they are one' he assumed Cartman may be 'life'.
"Okay cool, have you guys find a way out?."
"Is that the hippie?," Cartman asked finally paying attention to the buzzy feeling of his own ears.
"Yeah.." Kyle whispered more to himself than to anyone else, "Kenny?"
"Yeah? I'm here dude."
"Look this is gonna sound crazy but,"
'Bang'
"¡AAH!," Kyle looked at Cartman who had screamed in horror, then looked at his now wounded chest half lifted eyes before feeling his legs weakened.
'Fuck' was the only thing that came out before knocking out on the floor.
'Kyle!?'
'Kyle!?'
'Kyle!'
The boy slowly felt himself waking up by the sound of Stan's voice rumbling in his ears. He grunted, feeling sharp pains in his chest were he was previously shot, but managed to stand up.
He looked at his hands an feet, then his chest. It seemed to have healed as if it never happened 'had he dreamt it?' He looked around and found himself in the entrance of hell once more. Cartman was no longer at sight.
"Fuck," he frown 'this was being dragged too much', "Kenny, are you there?."
"Yeah man, what happened? We lost you for like an hour!."
"An hour? Holy shit.. okay, Kenny. I'm not crazy but I think you're 'death'."
"What."
"Yeah. I have a satanic looking book on me that has you drawn in here stating that you're bound into a soul."
"W-what?.."
"Yeah.. as crazy as it sounds but you're bonded. Not only are you bounded but to Cartman of all people."
"What!?," he heard both friends shout in unison.
"Look I don't know much for sure, but that's what I've gotten from what's written here. It says we need both of you to be able to get out."
"But how? I'm not allowed in hell."
"What?," he found himself confused by that comment but shrugged it off, "look 'the chosen soul must be into one of understanding to open a door through life and death' i- I honestly got lost by that point," Kyle admitted nodding to himself.
" 'The chosen soul must be into one of understanding to open a door through life and death..'," Kenny found himself repeating the words. He frowned.
Cartman and him were bounded.. but how? But why? Life and death. If he was death that makes Cartman life. Which having him in the underworld makes it not possible to be 'life'.
Death.. death is life. Which would makes sense if he were to die and revive.
Would that mean switching places with Cartman? As he found himself in life and he in death. All this is messing up his mind.
Would that mean what's been blocking him from both heaven and hell and keeping him in a sorta limbo state is because he's slowly becoming life? And Cartman..
'fuck'
"Kenny?," Stan's voice snapped him back.
"We need to find a way to bring Cartman back and quick!."
The chubby boy felt his body weakened while he was carried by his father. He had taken him to the rooftop of the building he owned while gripping tight with steel chains his wrists and legs into some torture table he had put there.
Half lifted eyes stared to the ground. He felt like shit.
His father stood there with clasped hands eyeing him everywhere as he was some golden trophy, as he were just waiting for something. But he couldn't grasp what it was.
"Did I ever mentioned you that Liane was part of a cult?," spoke Jack.
Cartman just kept silent as he began coughing badly.
The grown man walked towards him taking out a tissue from his pocket cleaning some of the trail blood he had cough out 'the fuck!?'
"When I first met your mother it wasn't at some stupid party your town folks had told you about. I met her in a cult meeting. I was young and was told they will be free booze," He reveal while fixing the boys now untied tie, "we felt attraction immediately and bonded over the fact that we were both there for booze, laugh it off and things just lead to an other," continued while shrugging.
Cartman found himself feeling his muscles spasm.
"I'm the good guy Eric! I would've never asked for this to have happen to you if I knew," he then place his hand onto his chest as an innocent demeanor, "your mother is to blame."
"The thing is, unlike me, Liane ended up getting too into the cult meeting and had unintentionally set herself up with two other soon to be parents, she had dragged me in, unaware of what would happened. She found it silly and fun and I found it a little creepy but followed through cause I was just too wasted to care about the odd rituals the other members were putting us in 'everthing for a piece of that' I kept telling myself."
The boy cut him off he began to have various seizures that lasted for up to three seconds before repeating itself, he felt his mouth grasping for air and being choked by his own saliva. His fingers twitched and his feet curled.
"And then, months after, you were born," unfazed the man wiped the saliva off his cheeks, "ofcourse by the time you were born I had no longer any contact with Liane and that so called meeting became a fuzzy memory for me."
"But, Eric," he approached the boy, face to face, "this, it's life changing," the boy heard while still trying to grasp for air, his vision long gone as it became blurry.
"Imagine, a Tenorman being able to switch in between worlds! Being able to use this curse and becoming one of the most powerful beings on both worlds," He ranted for himself, with every word being said his eyes dilated. Malicious, greed, selfishness surfacing, "not being able to die! HaHA! We'd be unstoppable!."
'Bang'
Tenorman fell into the floor.
Kyle then reloaded his shotgun while two other boys stood next to him.
"Stan help me with Cartman!," Kenny order running towards the almost unconscious boy. Stan nodded following.
They had manage to summon Satan while being in the upper world. Luckily Satan owed Stan a favor and it was just all convenient.
They managed to release Cartman by pressing a button that was place under the table with the label 'release' on it.
Kenny held the boy who convulsions worsened.
"Eric can you hear me?."
"K-kinny? Dammit kinny! Get out my death sequence," the boy complained even though his eyes looked elsewhere.
"You're not gonna die fat boy! You're already in hell."
"Oh, right," His body stiffened trying his best to take control but failed miserably once more, "how's it going?."
The comment made the blonde boy cracked a smile, "look Eric," he gently caress cartman's hair.
'That's gay' he heard the boy remark but ignored it.
"It'll be hard to believe this.. but I die," Kenny revealed, "like all the time," he sigh, feeling the glances of his other two friends on him.
"I know."
Kenny's eyes widen, "no, like I mean it, I die all the time!."
"I know," his chubby friend frown feeling stupid by hearing his best friend seemingly finding it hard for him to remember the obvious. And because of the condition he's in 'duh' he didn't feel like arguing, "I can tell you death by death, each and single one with detail and date."
Kenny was left with his mouth opened, speechless, he couldn't believe it. 'Is he really telling the truth or is he fucking with me?' All this time he's been looking for someone atleast one person that could remember. And he was there all along infront of him, someone he least expected.
"And you didn't bother on telling me!?," Kenny said angry, he felt his eyes water.
Cartman twitch in his arms, "nobody seemed to mentioned anything, and you never asked. I figured it may have been a bad dream or not as important cause nobody seem to believe me the few times I did mention it, they all looked at me weird as it I we're delusional," the boy admitted.
Now that he thought about it. The times he has admitted to someone about his curse, Cartman was never present. Which meant he had never given the opportunity to answer him. And when he mentioned it he was either dead or not around to tell.
Like if it were intentional for both boys to not be able to share this moment until now.
"You know what's messed up?," cartman's voice snapped him back, he had a weak smile plastered, "I began to be so use to it, it was easy to use your deaths. Like the time you were in the death bed or the time I had convinced everyone it would be best to disconnect you to have your psp, or being able to better my vision stealing one of your eyes, I knew you'd come back, you always did."
Kenny's eyes sparked in amusement 'he really did remember'.
"But the first few times.. kinny they were horrifying, I still feel uneasy but it isn't as before," his body twitch some more while he complained about the pain in his arms and legs, "I remember the rats eating your flesh, I remember trying to shoo them away cause you still weren't dead."
Kenny watched his friend with such warmth as if it were a cute tale he was retelling.
"The time Kyle killed you with a chainsaw," 'I what?' They heard their ginger friend asked confused but ignored it, "being killed by a bull, eaten by some pterodactyl, by oral sex, squished, run over," the boy shaked, the pain decreasing the more closer he got to kenny. On the other hand kenny was feeling immense warmth in his chest, like literal fire. 'Hell, It's really burning!'
Kenny remembered always being close in a certain way with Cartman, they even were once trapped together by his soul because the stupid idiot had eaten his ashes.
He glance down at Cartman who had let his head fall into his lap, smiling. 'This was kinda gay' he thought.
He felt the boy latching on to him, and he won't deny he felt the sudden urge to do the same which he unintentionally did. The burning sensation in his chest increased the pain, becoming unbearable 'fuuuuuck!'
On the other hand Cartman never felt more peaceful in Kenny's arms, he felt like he was in the clouds and couldn't recall why the sensation just felt like he was falling but there was no fear of an impact just comfort with in the clouds and sky.
Stan and Kyle didn't bare interrupt the two boys as they knew it was needed to get out and Kenny knew how to do it but they couldn't help feeling a little discomfort as this felt intimate and private. Atleast for Stan it wasn't displeasing just disturbing while with Kyle it was the opposite. He found the boys sudden closeness displeasing he just didn't know why.
Sudden the back door sling open reveling Jack. Kyle prepared his gun and pointed at him making him stop in his tracks.
"You guys don't know what're you're doing! Fuck, ¡no!," He exclaimed once he saw Kenny holding on to Cartman and vice-versa. He knew there was no longer takes back as their ritual bound was already in the stages of ending.
The two boys burst into flames seemingly showing no response to it. Atleast from Cartman's part, internally for Kenny it was a pain in the ass but he didn't show it. Sweat begin to pop up in his skin and his nails digged up in Cartman's suit, wincing his eyes shut.
Their silloette formed a door which proceeded to opened.
"Dude! I think it's the portal!," Stan exclaimed getting near it, while Kyle shot Tenorman in the head once more before following Stan. Not after glancing at Kenny and Cartman before jumping through the portal.
Cartman then layyed down flat finally letting go of Kenny. The blonde watched him while he started twisting in pain 'this is it' he then looked at Cartman, suddenly understanding before proceeding to enter the portal, finally vanishing.
Kenny sigh as he turned into ashes finally dying.
[...]
"Morning dudes," Kenny salute, beaming. He was in a good mood after all.
"Sup Kenny," Stan greeted.
"Hey Kenny," Kyle added.
"Cartman hasn't arrived yet?."
"That fat fuck probably forgot to turn his alarm on," the red head spoke with a yawn.
"Or, he did set an alarm but ignored it," Stan added.
"Either sound possible."
Not long after Cartman got on the bus greeting them.
"Hey dipshits!," he proceeded to take a seat next to Kenny who grinned at him, "so how you guys dealing after the hell incident?," he asked.
Stan and Kyle just raised a brow confused.
"What're you talking about, fatass?," Kyle then added while frowning not wanting to deal with Cartman's shit again this early in the morning.
"Yeah, dude, you alright?," Stan chimed in.
Kenny stared at Cartman still beaming while he saw the bigger boy's face turned in disbelief.
"Dude! I literally died a horrible death not long ago! Remember? Hell!? Kyle you literally went to save me!," he screamed.
"Did he also came in a shining armor?," Stan teased while both best friends, then, howl in laughter.
Cartman pouted bitterly. Kenny put a hand on his shoulder understanding well enough the feeling. The boy glance at him.
"Welcome to the club," he smiled.
Cartman looked up at the two boys infront of him that still found themselves laughing then looked at Kenny, smiling back.
"This sucks ass."
They both chuckled.
[...]
Kyle found himself approaching Cartman while they were entering the school entrance.
"Hey, fatass."
"What up," the fat boy answered while he took out his phone.
"About me saving you did I also bring a sword?," he bite his upper lip before bursting into laughter.
"Ha ha very funny Kahal," the boy said bitterly, "actually not only did you showed up in a shining armor, a sword, but you also kissed me on the lips as I was the damsel in distress." honestly was not the best combat but it was the first thing that came into spot. He wasn't planning to let Kyle have the last word after feeling still bitter about the red head not recalling the previous events.
Kyle was left baffled by that. For some reason Cartman's stupidity was beyond compression but the mystical accusation left him speechless.
Cartman had already proceeded on leaving to class but Kyle just stood there blank hearing a small noise in his ears that kinda sounded like 'hootie and the blowfish'.
In class Kenny had both his hands clenched, excited. He never felt more happy knowing someone does remember! Not only that, but the bound ritual just made their bound strengthen, as he watched Cartman knowing the other boy felt the same. He knew the feelings were true cause he felt it, they both felt each other when their soul united once more 'as gay as that sounds'. Cartman looked back at him sharing that same beaming felling before returning to bother Wendy interrupting her speech with slurs an unwanted opinions.
He always felt alone knowing no one remember him dying, an as much as he had his moments despising Cartman there was now this warmth comforting feeling that someone other than him knew, even if it were a bigot like Cartman. It's not like he could complain much after all, they will be forever bounded by a soul so there's no preventing being connected to one an other.
But he'd care less, he wasn't alone no more.
He smiled once again, he's been feeling all giggly all morning, he just couldn't help it. He was happy and today was just a nice super fantastic day.
School had ended as the bell rang.
The four boys walked with each other discussing what they'll do this evening as a squad.
"What about boar-"
"Stan, I swear to God if you say 'board games' once more I'll kill myself," Cartman interrupted by grunting.
Stan frowned.
"No offense dude, but Cartman's right. We've been playing boards games three times in a row for weeks," Kyle chimed in.
Kenny nodded. He knew Stan had developed a new obsession with board games when he moved to the farm and starting hanging out with Tolkien, which we didn't seem to mind much, but it had gotten boring being repeated multiple times everytime they hang out.
"What about cards?," the blonde suggested.
"Same shit," Cartman rolled his eyes with that.
Is that 'hootie and the blowfish' they began hearing in the background?
"Does anyone hear that?," Stan asked looking around.
"No," Kyle quickly stated.
"Anyways, what about basketball?," Cartman suggested while putting his attention on the others, his hands gripped on to his waist.
"You know what? That doesn't sound like a bad idea Cartman," Stan agreed while turning his focus onto Kyle who seemed kinda spaced out.
"Hm?," the boy said before barfing on Cartman.
'BLEEEEARGH!'
"Ah! Gross dude! Wtf Kahl!?," he wince disgusted wiping off the barf from his jacket, "disgusting!," he kept complaining.
"Sorry!."
"Woah dude," Stan exclaimed.
"I think breakfast didn't do me too well," the boy explained while rubbing his stomach, nauseous.
"Fuck you! You're so fucking disgusting!," Cartman kept rambling angry while walking off, seemingly going home, "ew! Screw you guys I'm going home."
"Sorry, Cartman!," Kyle apologized once more before returning his attention to the others, "so is basketball still on the list?."
"Hell yeah."
Cartman not long after joined the other three with a new jacket staying farther away from Kyle claiming that he didn't want the ginger to barf on him again which the boy rolled his eyes from and Stan calling him out a 'pussy' while continuing playing the game.
It was a nice evening with the four boys peacefully enjoying their company as everthing had turned back to normal.
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raveneira · 2 years ago
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The reason I dont believe KawaSara and BoruSumi are dead yet
Im gonna show you a few pages, pay close attention
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Notice anything consistent? if your answer is all 3 girls shown had their feelings explicitly expressed and confirmed by their own mouths and also third parties then you are correct.
Sumire’s feelings were confirmed by herself as well as Kawaki and Katasuke
Chocho’s feelings were confirmed by herself
Ada’s feelings were confirmed by herself, Code, and Shikamaru
Yet when you look at Sarada...theres zero confirmation of any kind neither by herself or anyone else.
I’ll elaborate, the question is asked but never answered, the topic is brought up but never addressed, Sarada will react but always deny or avoid not in a ‘omg I cant let my feelings be exposed’ way but in a ‘omg I really dont wanna talk about this right now’ way.
Ikemoto has confirmed 3 girls one sided feelings, so whats holding him back from doing the same for Sarada? ask yourself, what does he have to lose? BoruSara is the most popular ship so he would have more ppl celebrating him than he would hating him so theres no fear of major backlash if he did go all the way and confirm it so why not? its not like he couldnt still play the will they wont they game since Boruto’s feelings would still be unknown until the end so why not go for it? Ikemoto actually has far more to GAIN by making BoruSara semi canon than NOT so dont gimme that ‘hes just being careful and taking his time’ crap, that’d only fly if BoruSara was an extremely small ship with a very small fanbase which it isnt, so if theres any fandom he’d wanna commit to it’d be them.
So why hasnt he? what reason does he possibly have to hold back if this is truly the intended endgame? because it’ll be too obvious? so what, like I said BoruSara is the biggest fanbase so what harm does that do? you think Ikemoto is really gonna be THAT hurt by losing KawaSara, BoruSumi, MitsuSara, and BoruMitsu fans? hell no, same way Kishimoto wasnt hurt by losing NaruSaku, SasuHina, SasuKarin, and SasuNaru fans, that SasuSaku and NaruHina money was more than enough.
So I ask you again, WHY hold back when he has literally NOTHING to lose but EVERYTHING to gain? the answer is pretty obvious.
The only reason Ikemoto would be holding back is if he doesnt intend for BoruSara to be endgame, the only reason you would ever hold back to this extent but not on anything else is if you dont plan on making it a thing to begin with but you dont want to lose those supporters.
Let me put it this way, if Ikemoto catered to KawaSara and BoruSumi the ships he really wants canon and neglected BoruSara, what do you think is gonna happen? if you’ve seen any BoruSara fans statements you know they consider KawaSara and BoruSumi happening as ruining the series and feel that Kishimoto is ‘fixing’ his mistakes he made in Naruto [SS/NH canon] by making BoruSara canon [basically NS as it rightfully should’ve been in their opinion] and that doing otherwise will ruin Sarada and the series entirely [sounds familiar right?]
So what do you thinks gonna happen if Ikemoto made it clearer that KawaSara and BoruSumi were endgame and pushed Boruto and Sarada as just friends? obviously BoruSara fans, the biggest fanbase, will be furious with him and the backlash will be enormous, he’ll lose support, money, and the viewership will plummet drastically even more than they have already making it far more likely to get axed prematurely.
So what do you think he does to avoid that? obviously he caters to that fanbase, gives them little winks and nudges, just enough content to keep BoruSara fans hopeful and still reading, but refuse to give concrete confirmation from either side, and why do you think that is? because he has something else in mind.
For the record Im not saying I know for a fact KawaSara and BoruSumi are endgame, no I dont, Im saying if he IS planning on making them endgame then him avoiding confirming neither Boruto nor Sarada’s feelings but just keep teasing the possibility makes perfect sense.
He cant risk pissing off that fanbase because it’ll be a huge loss if he loses those viewers, so he gives them just enough to keep them around but never commits which makes no sense if BoruSara is endgame because he’d gain way more by confirming it than not, so the fact that he isnt just screams baiting until he’s ready to reveal his real endgame when he has nothing to lose.
So thats why I dont believe KawaSara and BoruSumi are dead yet, because the fact that Ikemoto wont commit to making BoruSara semi canon just screams bait and unlike them Im not fallin for it.
If Ikemoto eventually commits and confirms them semi canon I will say GGs then, but until then Im not takin the bait and remaining open minded until then.
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violetfairydust · 1 year ago
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20 Questions for fic writers
I was tagged by @dear-massacre thank you! I love you!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
0 as of yet, but I do plan on posting soonish!
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
Out of all of the fics I've written for Teen Wolf, my total word count so far is 1,115,142
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Predominantly Teen Wolf. I used to write for The Hunger Games and Divergent, but those have taken a back seat.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
I haven't posted full fics yet, but my mom's approximate top 5 favorites are
Spring Breaking the Rules - Liam and his friends are going on spring break and he invites his crush without consulting with his friends
Skating By - The Hales go rollerskating and run into some interesting characters who want Derek's attention. Features very jealous Stiles
Teacher Conferences - an AU where Stiles and Derek are dating during 3A. They run into Jennifer at the store the day before school starts and Stiles is jealous she's talking to Derek, and then the following day at school they get into a sass off
Operation: Hayden - Mason, Corey, and Nolan are afraid Hayden is coming back to Beacon Hills to reconnect with Liam even though he's moved on and they try to prevent the two of them interacting with the most ridiculous means possible
I Love You, You Love Me - all human AU where Scott dresses up for kids' birthday parties for extra money. Malia hires him for her young sister's party and he has major issues with his Barney costume
My top 5 most popular snippets that I have posted are
Stiles and Isaac argue about costumes from 'Here for the Boos'
Stiles' wetsuit from 'Lydia and the Princess'
Derek is concerned about Stiles from 'What Sees Us in the Dark'
Stiles is sick and Derek plays doctor from 'Doctor Derek'
Stiles wants to adopt the weird teenager from Louisiana from 'Needs a Waterpark'
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
When I was writing on FF dot net, I would sometimes, but I didn't have a lot of time. As soon as I get posting more, then yes.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Nothing Left to Lose. Bring on the brooding, inner turmoil, and mutual pining.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Most of my fics end on a happy note, or they're not super angsty. Off the top of my head I'm going with Family Practice because it's the fic where Stiles and Derek become parents and it's a very happy occasion.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
I have in the past, yes, and it was one of the major reasons I stopped posting at all.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
In my mind, yes. On paper, no. I used to, but I never posted it.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
I have not.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
I posted on FF dot net a fic that was really popular and then I found out one of my readers wrote a very similar fic. It wasn't stolen or a direct rip off, but I could tell it was very clearly based off what I wrote.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
No
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I've collaborated ideas, but we didn't write it together.
14. What’s your all time favourite ship?
I gotta go with Sterek. Always and forever.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
One of my old Divergent fics. I wrote it in Tris's POV and posted all of it, but then I was going to write it in Al's POV and I got halfway through, but readers will know how it ends.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I can come up with some funky fics. I enjoy my creativity.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Description. Either of the setting, characters, or actions. I try to flesh it out in editing, but it's difficult for me.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I don't personally do it because I'm not fluent in other languages. I'm totally fine with other people doing it. I just don't know enough to make it good.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Oof. I think it iCarly or Harry Potter.
20. Favourite fic you’ve written?
I'm proud of so many of them. One that I always go back to entertain myself is If I May Say because I gave myself an excuse to watch YouTube while writing. Scott challenges Malia to only reply to people with the last thing she heard in the video she's watching and her replies were perfect and concerning.
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makesometime · 1 year ago
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My darling @wordsandstrangeways tagged me to do this and I love talking about my fic so much for an introvert so I am delighted.
I’ll tag @sky-kiss, because I know she’s looking for something to give her a break from her big wonderful Raphael fic, and @hesalleyes because have you SEEN their work come on now.
Rules: Go to your published works on AO3 and list the first fic you ever published there, the last fic you published, any fic that you wrote for a fandom/ship only once, your favorite fic you wrote in the fandom/ship that has the most works, the fic you wish more people read, the fic you agonized over the most, the fic that sprang fully formed from your mind without any effort, and a work you are proud of—for whatever reason.
First fic published on Ao3: Whiskey Memories, a Terra Nova fic from way back in 2011. It was the first thing I published after making the jump from FF.net and even now I’m quite proud of everything I did in that fandom even though it was a very small one and a spectacularly shitty TV show.
Last fic published: More than words to show you feel that your love for me is real, my latest Baldur’s Gate fanfiction in which I hurt Astarion some more because why not. Have you seen him?
Fandom/ship I only wrote once: There are a few, but I’ll highlight Hope from Man of Steel, a Kal/Faora fic that I’m still quite fond of.
Favorite fic in most popular fandom/ship: I suspect it’s probably Stranger Things at this point, and my favourite is You had me at come over boy, my second most popular Steddie fic (the most popular is the one I wrote when I was discontented with the available Steddie vampire fic). I like this one a lot, it was fun to write, and it also got a comment that there was too much Nancy in it for a Steddie fic which was absolutely hilarious to me given that she was mentioned roughly 3 times. (don’t go looking for it, I deleted it)
Fic I wish more people read: I just went through all my fics from least to most hits and that was a bit depressing, don’t do that. But my answer is probably Loves in your life live ever on which was a Christmas gift fic for @hesalleyes combining RQG and Hades (the game). I don’t think it really did well in either fandom, but I think my Zag and Than voices are pretty good and I’m sad that so few people read it.
Fic I agonized over: There have been so many. So many. But actually figuring out one to answer this question was not so easy. And then I remembered my bastard of a fic Take heart, fair days will shine; take any heart, take mine which was a love letter to Oscar Wilde (RQG). It was not easy. I found it such a challenge. But I am so proud of it now.
Fic that popped out fully-formed: God, basically any RQG fic. I have never been as inspired as I was during that time. Week after week I’d write thousands of words. I think Nothing unfixable was really the epitome of this though. I had a single thought about Oscar losing all his scars post-resurrection and suddenly 2,341 words existed.
Fic I'm proud of: Truly, one of my favourites is You kissed me just to kiss me, not to make me cry, a Stede/Ed fic for Our Flag Means Death. It’s a very very soft first time but I just love it so much.
Honourable mention to Pieces of me are pieces of you, my most popular RQG fic and one I truly adore even though it’s now not canonical. Oscar and Zolf in Svalbard accidentally proposing to each other just makes me so soft.
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13eyond13 · 2 years ago
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Any tips for getting famous on tumblr?
Ahaha I wouldn't say I'm Tumblr famous, but here are some experience-based
Tips for getting mutuals and engagement and asks:
-Reblog and/or like other people's content often, and also try to create your own content of some kind. The blogs that catch my attention the most and make me want to follow/follow back are the ones that are actively curating a personal aesthetic and/or have some sort of unique or enjoyable content they are creating themselves too. I like following blogs where I can get the content that I'm interested in having on my dash plus a good sense of the personality behind the scenes
-Try to be fairly consistent and frequent about posting, and use some of the relevant popular tags on your original posts like the fandom and the character and ship names to make sure they show up in those tags for people to find (eg. #death note #light yagami #lawlight)
-A great way to get people to notice your blog is simply to notice them and their blog or their content first too. Send some friendly asks off anon to bloggers who are looking for asks, or about whatever topics seem to be their fave thing or their area of expertise. If sending asks feels too intimidating you can also reblog their posts with some thoughtful compliments or jokes in the tags, which will probably flatter them into checking out who was noticing and appreciating them. I recommend sending asks or talking through the comments on posts before sending people private messages until you get to know them a little better though, as that feels a bit less intimate to do
-Once you gather some followers it definitely helps to maintain a fairly steady presence and not disappear for long periods of time, because you mostly only show up on followers' dashes if you're actively posting and reblogging things. They probably aren't intentionally ignoring you or your blog most times, they just don't really know if you're alive otherwise! If you're worried about spamming people's dashes too much or don't want to be chronically online then you can always use the queue feature to post things automatically for you at a slower, steady rate as well
-A good way to get asks once you have some followers is simply to make a post asking for asks about a specific topic or to take and fill requests of some kind. You can also reblog ask memes that invite people to ask you specific sorts of questions too. This helps others know what you're comfortable with before they decide to strike up a conversation with you. Answering asks usually leads to other people sending asks too, so it can become a fairly self-sustaining thing after a little bit
-I think a large part of the reason I've gained a following here over the years is because I have a clear set of boundaries on my page about who I am and what I'm ok with, and because I maintain a pretty organized and broad collection of content from this fandom that is well-tagged and easy to browse. I started out creating the blog I personally would want to find as a new member of the DN fandom and then I went from there. It helps to have a fairly clear idea in mind of the kind of blog you want to host from the beginning, but you can also adjust it as you go just depending on the kind of feedback you get and such. I didn't even expect or plan to get any asks here in the beginning, but after a few months of me sending asks to others and reblogging content and writing posts people started coming to me quite regularly with their thoughts. Maybe because I made a point of being welcoming to new fans and answering the questions about the fandom and the series that they had
-It helps to be patient about stuff like gaining followers and mutuals and not to stress out too much over something like losing a follower or two, too! That happens to absolutely everybody eventually, and you really have no definite idea why your follower count might have dropped most times. So just don't stress yourself over it and try not to take it too personally or check your total numbers super often if you can (I am on here daily, but maybe only intentionally check my own total follower count once or twice a month)
-Overall just creating the blog you yourself might want to find, being consistent with your posting, respectful and appreciative of the other creators and fans, and not being afraid to reach out first or create some content of your own are probably the best things you can do to increase the engagement that you're getting on your blog. Good luck 🤗
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dojae-huh · 2 years ago
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Hello! I just want to say reading your blog reignites my interest on this ship and reading your observations about them makes me think I've been missing quite a lot of their moments/interactions. I was a casual jaedo shipper back in 2017-2018. I knew doyoung and jaehyun since rookies days since I was a fan of suju and then exo. I was also well aware of them mc-ing together as it was happening back then (I saw people complained that sm is promoting the rookies too much). (1/4)
But I started stanning them full time only when doyoung was added in 127 for limitless comeback. As a new fan of doyoung, I just casually follow what seemed to be his most popular ship without much thinking. I just think jaedo looks good together. I also understand where the shipping comes from (them mc-ing together) so I was not reluctant to jump in. And then I sort of lost interest in nct circa 2019-2021. I didn't keep up with detailed updates, let alone any jaedo that happened. (2/4)
Only when the link+ happened I came back to the fandom with renewed feelings. Doyoung has alwasy been my bias, it never changed. The question for me was do I still ship jaedo or not. Last month when there were rumors of twitter closing down, I prepared to move to tumblr. That's when I stumbled over your blog. After reading/lurking here for weeks, you've totally changed my perspective on them. (3/4)
Personally, I participate in shipping because it's fun, I don't necessarily want to believe that they are real. But as I read more and more of your posts, I keep doubting myself that maybe.. maybe... I was wrong. Some of the proofs/observations you presented are just too hard to deny, and I'm losing my mind over it. Thank you for opening my eyes to all the things I've missed I guess. I hope you have a great day :) (4/4) ps. I don't know how to send a long ask so I hope this was correct.
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Hi-hi, thank you for writing, you gave an interesting new perspective.
I guess we need a different word for following/supporting a real celebrity couple, but there is none, plus the "ship" umbrella kind of helps to hide (to not attract too much unwanted attention), and there are elements of "normal shipping" in place as well.
I'm sure I'm read by people who do not believe me. And there are readers who noticed the couple themselves, made their own conclusions, and only found additional arguments here.
I get why JaeDo as a "classical" ship will not be as interesting nowadays in comparison to the earlier years. They do not interact much, there are less content for the two of them, there are other rival ships, and there are lesser people who write fanfics or do content. Not the "evidence" kind of content though. Compilations with moments of the year are continued to be made. I feel like fans are even more sure with each passing year. All the hiding only persuades in the positive, heh.
I don't know from which angle JaeDo are again interesting to you (the realness?), but I think at this point (considering they've been together for 4,5 years and "settled down") it's more about observing how the two grow as artists side by side, supporting each other. If I'm not mistaken, Doyoung didn't bubble anything on the day of Jae's incident with Puma's monkey bars. We can see the whole way from ShowChamp to the current dome tours and brand deals.
Heh. I'm reminded about the fanmeetings and fans hugging Jaehyun or Doyoung, and their reactions. Even today there are still new moments to be surprised with. The ship isn't dead.
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emeraldspiral · 20 days ago
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Voltron was the thing that really popularized the motal purity culture we see nowadays in fandom spaces but for some reason it reared its ugly head BEFORE Voltron.
all I know is that I was in a fandom for a good long while, and by 2016 it was GONE.
around 2014 people went insane with nonsensical fictional moral panic and started harassing all the big name ship artists and around 2015 most of them left the fandom behind because they couldn't deal with the constant harassment and sui baiting. by 2016 there were basically none left.
I'm talking 30+ artist, wonderful art, blogs, aus, headcanons, theories all GONE their blogs deleted and wiped
this behavior in 2012 was completely unheard of and by 2016 it destroyed my fandom. nowadays I'm lucky if the ship gets a piece of art every few months and the brave artists who do post about it still get harassed. it used to be one of the most common ships pre purity culture!! it was a booming community!!
I genuinely have no idea why and how this all started, as Voltron only came out in 2016!!!
anyway sorry for the rant the topic just made me sad and I wanted to share :(
love your blog btw!! your iz headcanons are awesome :3
I feel like early tumblr was mostly populated by teens and college students who were just recently introduced to queer feminist intersectional social justice concepts after a lifetime of sheltering in the public education system where a lot of that stuff is watered down if it's talked about at all. So you had a lot of overeager young people having their minds opened up for the first time, and then they start parroting feminist theory they heard from one person and only half-understood to other young people, and it keeps losing its nuances and having its points missed or twisted to fit into someone else's ideology and it becomes like a xerox of a xerox of a xerox the more it gets passed along.
And sometimes you'd also have people just making stuff up. Like, they have an idea or a theory, and they think they've hit upon some brilliant epiphany. And because they say it confidently and with a catchy slogan and it kinda makes sense if you don't think about it too hard, people buy it. But it's not supported by any research and if you pull at any of the threads of their logic whatever "truth" they think they divined completely unravels.
Some of those people are probably well meaning and just trying to emulate popular people that they admire who talk about SJ issues. But there's a lot of people who do it just so they can get popular and pretend to be superior to others. A lot of people intentionally set out to become social justice influencers in order to gain people's trust so they can sick them on people they don't like or target people for grooming and abuse and gaslight them into thinking what's happening to them isn't happening and if they speak out their followers will shield them and harass their victims off the internet.
All of this is exacerbated by the fact that people tend to only examine their beliefs on a surface level, so they think that just because they believe in gay rights and abortion they're woke. But the reality is, Christianity permeates so much of western civilization that whether you've ever practiced it or not you are absolutely influenced by it and a lot of distinctly Christian ideas are at the foundation of your whole way of thinking. A lot of people base their ideas of good and evil and right on wrong on their gut reactions rather than evidence of actual harm because Christianity promotes the idea that you're supposed to just know these things intuitively. A lot of people buy into the idea that exposure to "immoral" content taints and corrupts them. If you really want to look at the "immoral" stuff you can convince yourself that it's okay for you because your superior moral fortitude and enlightenment makes you immune to corruption. But you can't trust the common plebs because they're too weak-minded and impure to inoculate themselves against sinful influences, which makes it your duty to campaign to have those influences removed for their own good. A lot of people think being okay with gay sex and sex outside of marriage makes them sex-positive but they still talk about all sex and sexual expression as if it's inherently dirty and sinful and degrading and vulgar outside of a select few circumstances in which it's somehow divorced from lust to make it a pure expression of Divine Love.
And that's how you end up with the extremely toxic culture of 2010s tumblr, before the NSFW purge led to most of the people who were like this fleeing to twitter.
So yes, prior to V0ltron people were using garbage social justice arguments to attack ships for being "problematic". But also, people were using those arguments to attack anything and everyone they didn't like to make it a moral issue so their petty dislike could feel more like an objectively moral stance.
There was an entire blog dedicated to listing all the reasons why you shouldn't like this actor/writer/director/whoever, sometimes for legitimately scummy things they did, which people who stanned them might not have known about. But most of the time for really petty reasons, or stuff that was made up or interpreted disingenuously. I think the creator of that blog even admitted that she lied to herself that it was about spreading awareness and discouraging celebrity worship and parasocial relationships. It just felt good and made her feel better about herself to pick apart and find fault in other people and things that people liked and act like she was morally superior for not liking them. Or at the very least she admitted that despite her intentions that ended up being the primary purpose it was used for by the people who contributed to it and she regretted fostering that culture and getting sucked into it herself.
I think what made V0ltron different was the fact that it was so deliberate and coordinated. Like, there was an actual group of masterminds who weren't just having emotions and then using moral reasoning to justify their emotions and the inappropriate ways they were acting out over them. They were fully aware that they were co-opting SJ rhetoric and combining it with puritan rhetoric in order to demonize a totally vanilla ship in service of the righteous crusade of canonizing their own ship. And they convinced a lot of useful idiots to adopt the beliefs they were faking sincerely. And now those people are passing those beliefs along and normalizing them for the next generation and telling them not to listen to us Millennials who already went through this with the Satanic Panic/Don't Ask Don't Tell/Abstinence Only Education era.
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theangryjikooker · 3 months ago
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I'm a non-shipper ARMY and seriously reading your posts has made me feel so "seen", I don't know how else to explain it. This fandom is so black and white, you're either this or that and there's no in between. I can't tell you how many times I've been met with hostility and being called a "closeted joker" by anti-shippers I was friends with simply for saying I find Jimin & Jungkook's dynamic/interactions very weird. I never once actually believed they had more than platonic relations, and chapter 2, Muse era and that conversation they had in the car in the travel show confirmed it all for me, but most of the time out of all the duos in BTS, they are the two who have always made me feel uncomfortable watching them.
Seeing a non-shipper talk about seeing that same weirdness between JK & JM makes me feel like I'm not crazy after all. I thought I was alone.
But I've realized that anti-shippers are way more triggered by Jikook than Taekook. I just don't understand why I can say "Taekook seem like the closest in BTS, especially since solo era. Taehyung is on a roll, I really don't blame people who think they they may be romantically involved" and nobody bats an eyelash (they sometimes even agree), but when I say "Don't you get this feeling like you're intruding 95℅ of the time watching Jikook interactions?", everybody loses their minds instead of just disagreeing if they don't see it.
(Anyway I don't know where this ask is really going lol, I came here to say something really smart but I always forget stuff mid-typing and my mind just goes blank. But yeah, I think I also wanted to add that I don't understand how Jikookers STILL think there's a romantic relationship there (what is it gonna take?), it's like they've just decided to ignore that conversation and focus on butt slaps and cuddles in bed. Shippers will really just be shippers at the end of the day. I feel like once you mentally get so deep into the belief that two real people are hiding a relationship and make every little thing they say and do out to be a "sign" of said relationship, it's goodbye to reality and logical thinking. It's gonna be really hard for you to free yourself from that way of cult-like way of thinking. Jikookers always brand Taekookers as Larries 2.0 but I think they are all the same, Jikookers included, and they are proving it)
Yes, hello! 👋🏻
"But I've realized that anti-shippers are way more triggered by Jikook than Taekook [...]" – Probably because most anti-shippers, which are arguably most non-shippers/OT7s, are actually fans of Tkk already. For all that Jkkrs can piss me off at times, their affinity for Jkk is dwarfed by the popularity of Tkk by the general public. TH or JK, individually or together, garner more views and likes than JK or JM do by far. It is what it is.
"Shippers will really just be shippers at the end of the day." – 100%. But I can understand why shippers continue to ship Jkk, Tkk, or other BTS ships romantically, but that's more the psychology of fandom than anything else. Shippers will also, naturally, create an echo chamber for themselves. People can do whatever they want, and I'm merely pointing out the things that don't make sense to me as one of many other observers.
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