#The characters who used to be angels got changed into just being med school college students | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

cakesunflower · 6 years ago

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The Viridian [C.H. One Shot]

sooo this is over 20k words of something i really enjoyed writing omg. if you’ve seen Good Trouble, the spin off of The Fosters, this may remind you of it based on the communal living situation. but yeah. i hope y’all enjoy it omg. happy reading!!

“It’s a glorified dorm. That is what you’re subjecting yourself to.”

Parker Hayden rolled her eyes at the words of her best friend, Sage, who had just dropped a box of Parker’s medical books on the wooden floor with a loud thud. Focusing on her task of hanging her clothes in the closet, Parker responded, “There’s nothing wrong with communal living, Sage.”

There was a scoff from behind her as the metal of the hanger clinked on the rod she was hanging them on, the closet space slowly but surely filling up with each additional hanger. “Maybe when you’re in college,” came her best friend’s unconvinced response. “Not when you’re a prodigal, badass trauma surgeon in one of the top hospitals in the country.”

Parker’s lips quirked up at the compliment, ignoring the prodigal part of the sentence. She was quite young for someone in their third year of residency, only at twenty-five when most people graduated medical school at twenty-six. But Parker was smart and made her way fast by herself, without coming from a family lineage of doctors, and had the sociable personality to never let anyone doubt her. Turning around to raise an eyebrow at Sage, who was getting ready to put the sheets on the bed, Parker walked over to help and teased, “I thought I already was a badass trauma surgeon? Have you been lying to me this whole time?”

Sage rolled her eyes as she grabbed onto the edge before letting the rest of the sheet fly across the mattress so Parker could grab onto it. As they tucked the teal colored sheets in, Sage retorted with a small smirk, “You’re a trauma surgeon living in a commune. That’s not entirely badass. Or very prodigal of you.”

“You’re just jealous I get a pool.”

Sage’s movements stopped, straightening as she stared at Parker with dark eyes narrowed in disbelief. “This place has a pool?!” she demanded, hands finding her hips indignantly as her lips parted at the newfound fact.

This time Parker smirked, continuing to fit the sheet on the mattress before snickering, “Not so subjecting now, is it?”

With a dismissive scoff, Sage went back to making the bed as she grumbled, “Whatever. Almost everyone in L.A. has a pool.”

Parker’s blue eyes sparkled against the sunlight streaming through the large window panes behind Sage, whose dark skin was practically glowing against the late afternoon golden rays. They put the pillows on the bed, and Parker grinned. “Everyone but you.”

Sage was quick to toss a decorative pillow at Parker’s face, their laughter ringing through the surprisingly open space of her bedroom. Despite all of Sage’s teasing and comments, Parker was looking forward to living The Viridian. She never really had a problem with living with strangers; she dormed with strangers all throughout college and then in a shared apartment through med school where she met Sage. The two of them lived together during their intern year, but the more Sage and her boyfriend got serious, the quicker Parker realized she was going to have to find another place to live because the apartment they shared was under Sage’s name. The neuro surgeon would never kick Parker out, would’ve forced her boyfriend, Xavier, to be okay with the fact that he would have to live with his girlfriend and best friend. But Parker wanted them to have their own space, would’ve felt like she was intruding despite Sage’s protests, so she found The Viridian, and was excited to stay.

Part of Parker knew that Sage’s comments stemmed from her desire of hopefully getting Parker to move back in with her, but Parker wasn’t going to budge. She was happy for Sage and Xavier for taking that big step forward in their relationship, and she didn’t want to put herself in a happy time that Sage should just have with her boyfriend. Plus, Parker loved meeting new people, had to do so every day at work, and while she understood that living in a place like this meant sharing it with a bunch of complete strangers she’d have to see every day, she was still excited.

The rent was cheap, and the place was quite spacious. The gated elevator would come up to a hallway, glass doors right across that opened up into a wide foyer with grayish-blue walls with a coat closet on the right along with the doorway to the communal bathrooms. There was a row of sinks in the middle of the bricked room with mirrors, the left side where the showers were—sealed only by curtains—and the right side with toilet stalls—though those were actually sealed by proper doors. Parker was used to sharing bathrooms with men when she lived in the apartment during med school, though she knew she would have to get used to stepping out of the shower in her towel and having to see one of her male housemates standing at the sink brushing his teeth or something.

Then again, she was a surgeon. The human body didn’t really leave her flustered.

“Oh, hi! You’re here already, good!” Parker and Sage paused in their way towards the main doors leading to the elevators in the hall, watching as Roslyn, the building manager and just a few years older than Parker, entered with hands carrying bags filled with clinking bottles of alcohol. Lots of alcohol. She offered a friendly smile to Parker, green eyes bright yet apologetic. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t here, I had to run some errands and—”

“Oh, no, it’s fine, really,” Parker immediately placated with a light laugh, waving her off with a smile. “One of the guys let me in—uh, Luke, I think?” she tried to recall with a furrow of her eyebrows, recalling the exceptionally tall blonde that had greeted her downstairs with blonde hair tied back into a bun and blue eyes that put her own to shame. He’d been startlingly handsome, rendering Parker dumbly speechless for a moment before remembering her ability to speak.

“Good, good, Luke’s a sweetie,” Roslyn smiled in relief, blowing a lock of dark hair away from her face. She reminded Parker of a cute cartoon character, animated in the way she spoke and acted, a happy glimmer in her emerald colored eyes. “Have you had the chance to meet the others?”

Parker remembered the pretty Italian girl with the dirty blonde hair who had greeted her in a hurry as she ran past Parker’s new room, stopping to say hello before running off to a work function she’d been running late for. “Carina,” she answered, laughing lightly as she thought of their brief meeting.

Roslyn nodded along, curls bouncing as she did so. “Well, you’ll meet the others tomorrow night at the party. Calum and Ashton should be back from their trip by then.”

Sage raised an eyebrow, bumping Parker’s hip with hers as she crossed her arms over her chest. “You’re having a party and didn’t tell me?”

Shaking her head, Parker parted her lips to deny her knowledge of any party, which she truly had no idea about, before Roslyn cut in with a laugh. “Oh, sorry, I forgot to mention it! We throw a party at The Viridian on every first Friday of the month, it’s kind of a tradition.” With a smile at Sage, she said, “You’re more than welcome to come! It’ll also be a housewarming party for Parker! Invite as many friends as you want. There’ll be plenty of liquor,” she assured with a giggle, holding up the bags that were weighed down by the bottles inside. Her grin widened, moving around the two other girls to go into the kitchen as she chirped, “Prepare your livers!”

Sage exchanged a look with Parker, her smirk returning as an approving look flashed across her face—the first one since she’d stepped foot into The Viridian. “I like her.”

*****

When Parker shut the glass door of the foyer behind her later that same night, it was around two in the morning. A couple of hours after completely moving into her new place, she had to go into the hospital because there had been a ten car pile up, so her presence was demanded in the E.R., which was her area of specialty, with the Head of Trauma. They’d been lucky; no lives were lost in the accident, but the E.R. had been crazy and there hadn’t been a moment’s rest, and no matter how many times Parker thought she was used to being on her feet all the time, the thought was thrown out the window by the end of the day when all she wanted to do was chop off her legs.

It was quiet in the loft, almost eerily so, the only light being on was the one above the stove in the kitchen, providing a soft and dull glow while most of the living room was shadowed pieces of furniture. The large window panes on the opposite side of the foyer in the living room showed the darkened city of downtown Los Angeles, some lights scattered about to showcase a bit of life that still remained awake at this hour.

Silently, Parker wandered into her bedroom, clicking the door shut behind her as she switched on the light and toed off her shoes by the door. As she approached her bed while undoing the button and zipper of her jeans, Parker caught sight of a bottle of Sutter Home white Moscato sitting on her bedside table, her eyebrows shooting up at her favorite wine that she most definitely hadn’t bought, picking up the little card that was leaning against it.

Just a little housewarming gift for you. Welcome to The Viridian, Parker! We’re so happy to add you to the family!—Roslyn

A smile quirked at the surgeon’s lips at Roslyn’s loopy handwriting, perfectly fitting her personality. Parker felt touched at the warm gesture, vaguely recalling how Roslyn had asked her about her favorite kind of drink when Parker had met up with her for the first time about the empty space she was hoping to rent. The fact that Roslyn went out of her way to buy the wine for her as a gift was so sweet, and only strengthening Parker’s resolve of wanting to live her—as if she’d even doubted it.

After changing into a pair of night shorts and an oversized Stanford shirt, Parker found herself not really too tired to fall asleep. She sat on the edge of her bed, eyeing the bottle with a thoughtful twist of her lips. She wasn’t as tired as she thought she’d be, but she was thirsty.

So with her phone in one hand and the bottle in the other, Parker slipped into her flip flops and left her room, walking into the kitchen to pull out a wine glass, rinsing it in the sink before her eyes drifted to the stairs. There was no second floor, with all the rooms on the same level as hers, but the stairs led to the roof she’d only gotten to see when she first met with Roslyn to check out the place. It was spacious and open up there, with a pool in the middle and chairs around it, as well as a space that had turned into a makeshift bedroom with three glass walls anyone could look into.

Parker recalled Roslyn saying that was Calum’s bedroom, one of the two guys she had yet to meet, and seeing as he wasn’t here, Parker quietly made her way up the twisting stairs that led to the door.

It was beautiful out, warm with a calming breeze, as Parker stepped outside, eyes going to the buildings towering around the one she lived in. They provided optimal light for her to navigate her way around the roof, as did the lights in the pool, as she walked around it towards the bricked railing to lean against it, setting the glass on top of it as she poured some of the wine into it.

There was a sense of tranquility that washed over her as she sipped at her drink, arms folded on top of the cool brick as she gazed out at the city, the buzz of cars driving around incessant and never ending. Everything seemed so alive around her, even at this late hour, the occasional blaring of horns reminding her of the millions of hearts beating around the city. She was always around death, trying her hardest to save lives instead of lose them, that the strangest reminder of the life around her was always welcomed. It eased the somewhat erratic rate of her heart after a trying day and steadied her trembling fingers, reminding herself that not everyone’s life was in her control. That she was going to lose people despite her best efforts.

Parker took a sip of the wine before closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, inhaling the dull smoke of the city and the chlorine of the pool, her lack of sight making her aware of the sounds around her. Like the gentle rattling of the fairy lights hung around the roof, unlit. Or the distant bark of a dog somewhere below.

And then there was a splash.

A startled gasp escaped Parker, grip on her glass tightening as she swiveled around jerkily, widened blue eyes on pool where the previously undisturbed water were rippling violently, watching as a warbled figure moved underwater. Her pulse was racing, she could acutely feel it, eyebrows shot up and breath still as she waited for whoever the hell it was to show their face. She hadn’t heard anyone else step out onto the roof, too lost in her thoughts, and frankly assuming that everyone was asleep to join her out here.

A few moments passed, with Parker impatiently watching with furrowed eyebrows, not wanting to look away from the pool just yet as a light breeze tickled at her skin. She chewed at the corner of her lip, breath hitching when the person finally decided to break through the surface—right in her direction.

A dark head raised from the water, soaked and sticking to glistening brown skin. It was a man, whose eyes Parker couldn’t see since they were closed, but could make out tattoos marking the skin on his collarbones and arm, water splashing and dripping as he raised his hands push back the hair that matted his forehead. Parker couldn’t tear her eyes away, admiring the way the lights in the pool reflected against him animatedly, watching as his eyes finally opened and she caught sight of dark brown irises and full lips with water dripping from them.

He was probably one of the most gorgeous men she’d ever laid eyes on, she decided then and there, unable to look away even when she was aware of the confused, almost glaring, frown furrowing at his thick eyebrows when he noticed her presence. Two strangers watching each other, lost in thought and confusion and admirance, yet neither daring to just yet break the silence existing between them. For a moment, Parker imagined how he’d glow under the fairy lights if they were on, if his brown skin would appear more golden in the warm yellows.

“Who are you?”

His voice was deep, not uncomfortably so, carrying a bit of a rasp and a hint of an accent in the cautiously curious tone he spoke with. He eyed her suspiciously, dark eyes taking her in, from her mint painted toes to up the length of her exposed legs to the top of her blonde head. Yet somehow, Parker didn’t find herself bristling under his scrutinizing gaze, despite feeling the intensity roll off of it in heated waves, nor did she find it leering. He looked at her as if she couldn’t be trusted, floating away from her slightly, as if the already existing space of water between them wasn’t providing enough distance.

Parker tried not to be offended, not entirely used to people not trusting her right away; as a surgeon, gaining her patients’ trust was always something she excelled at. She swallowed, feeling the remnants of the wine in her throat, as she answered, “Parker Hayden. I, uh, just moved in today.”

A vague recognition flashed across the guy’s face, lifting his chin as droplets of water raced down his neck and collarbones before disappearing back into the pool. Parker did her best not to follow them. “You’re the one who moved into Mike’s room,” he stated, more to himself than to her, his words not entirely having an effect on her. She didn’t know who Mike was, didn’t really care to ask when she found the availability for the room. A place to live popped up and she’d grabbed it. Though, judging by the disenchanted way the guy spoke, it seemed as though he’d rather she hadn’t.

She offered a single, slow nod, grip on her glass tight as her gaze remained fixed on the man in the pool. Parker wasn’t sure if it was the shadows of the lights of the buildings and the pool, but she could make out some definition in his arms, the left one tattooed, biceps glistening with water. “Guess that’s me,” she confirmed, raising her glass to her mouth, taking a sip after questioning, “Who’re you?”

Instead of answering right away, the dark haired man swam towards the far end of the pool before using the steps to climb out, and Parker’s traitorous eyes followed his every movement. They took in the way the muscles on his back rippled as he went, the water melodically dripping down his body as the black trunks stuck to his strong flexing thighs with each step. Parker held her breath, watching as he picked up a towel from a nearby chair and wiped at his face and rubbed it through his hair, dark eyes finding her blue from the distance as he rubbed himself down.

All the while, Parker was forcing herself not to let her gaze linger on his body. His tattooed, brown skinned body with a delicious amount of muscles in all the right places as his dark hair stuck up in places haphazardly. He took her in, as if he was memorizing every part of her, and for the first time Parker found herself flushing under his gaze, wondering what he was thinking as he took in her legs and beach wave hair and makeup free face that showed off the hundreds of freckles decorating her. She refused to shift her weight on her feet, only ever wanting to feel judged by her teachers at the hospital, not by some half naked guy who was making her feel more warm than the wine she was drinking.

And as scrutinizing as his gaze was, it was also lazy, hooded eyes and full lips parted ever so slightly in thought as he regarded her. For the few moments he was staring at her—though, they felt like hours—Parker hated that he was so easily, so effortlessly, driving her crazy in wondering what he was thinking as he looked at her.

Then, he wrapped the towel around his neck, holding onto the ends with both hands before he turned around. Parker blinked at him, affronted that he wasn’t even going to bother introducing himself after she had given him that courtesy. But then she took a soft breath as he took a step up on the platform that led to the only bedroom on the roof, realization striking her a second before he opened the door and answered with a name that sounded like a goodbye to end the night, “Calum Hood.”

*****

The Viridian was flooding with people by the time Parker arrived with Sage and Xavier. She’d known she’d get back when the party was already started, having stopped at Sage’s place after work to change into more appropriate wear consisting of heeled boots, a tight black leather skirt and a royal purple colored bodysuit with spaghetti straps and tight to accentuate her breasts in all the right ways. They had heard the music blaring halfway up the elevator ride, the sound louder and clearer as they stepped out in the hallway where a few people were lingering before entering the large loft.

The smell of booze and weed hit almost instantly, and Parker raised her eyebrows at the amount of people gathered, dancing to a remixed version of Sicko Mode playing throughout the loft. But before letting herself get lost in the party, Parker quickly went over to her room, smiling in relief that the door was locked before pulling out her key to unlock it, toss her bag inside, and pocket her key with her phone after locking the door behind her so no one would enter.

She heard an excited squeal over the music as she found Sage and Xavier in the kitchen, pouring themselves some drinks. “The guest of honor has arrived!”

Parker turned to look at a grinning Roslyn, her cheeks flushed which told the surgeon that the green eyed girl was already slightly drunk, letting out a laugh. “No, no, I’m not the guest of honor. Please don’t say that.”

Roslyn clicked her tongue, waving her off with her free hand as the other held a cup, before gesturing to a guy that she’d pulled along with her. Parker looked up at him, just now noticing the tall man who had a dimpled smile and red hair that put her lipstick color to shame. “This is Ashton!” Roslyn introduced loudly, hugging the man sideways as he chuckled and draped his arm around her shoulders. “His room’s the one next to yours. Ash, this is Parker, our new roomie.”

“It’s great to meet you,” Ashton smiled, shaking Parker’s hand as she returned the friendly grin. “I was hoping to meet you this morning but Rose said you were already out.”

Smile turning slightly apologetic, Parker let out a short chuckle. “Yeah, sorry—I’m a surgical resident over at St. Ambrose so I’m always running out at odd hours,” she informed him, leaning her hip against the stoned counter where all of the bottles and cups were laid about for people to help themselves to.

At her words, Ashton’s eyebrows shot up as he tilted his head. “Oh, really? That’s cool as shit,” he grinned in admiration. “What’s your, uh, specialty?”

“She’s a kickass trauma surgeon,” Sage’s proud voice cut in, widening Parker’s grin with a scoff as she felt Sage’s arm drape around her shoulders. Ashton and Roslyn both looked at her with smiles quirking at their lips while Sage held her cup, not so humbly adding in, “And I’m neuro. Saving people’s lives—it’s what we do.”

Parker rolled her eyes, laughing out a muttered, “Oh, God,” as Sage introduced herself and Xavier. The two of them then conversed with Ashton, while Roslyn looked around before huffing to Parker, “I want you to meet Calum too, but I don’t know where he is.”

“Oh, that’s fine,” Parker shook her head, turning to the counter to grab a clear plastic cup to make herself a margarita as she spotted the ingredients around. “I, uh, met him last night, actually,” she added, feeling her throat dry just a little bit at the image of the shirtless, soaked man that flashed through her mind.

“Mm, really?” Roslyn questioned excitedly after swallowing a sip of her drink, stepping up next to Parker as she made her drink. The high volume of the music practically made the stone counter vibrate under her touch. “What’d you think of him?”

Intense. Hot. Drop dead gorgeous. “Uh, we didn’t really get to talk much but he seems. . .”

A small, knowing smirk quirked at Roslyn’s lips as she raised her eyebrows, tilting her head slightly. “Quiet? Broody? Like he would rather get hit in the head twice over than have a conversation?” Her quick words had a startled yet amused laugh escaping from Parker, eyebrows shooting up as she glanced at the building manager, catching the grin spreading on Roslyn’s lips. At least Parker wasn’t the only one who got that kind of vibe from Calum. He did seem like the type to keep to himself, but she just figured that was because they were literally meeting for the first time at two in the morning, when neither of them were too in the mood to hold a proper conversation. “Trust me, he’s a real nice guy once you get to know him. He just keeps to himself most of the time.”

Parker nodded along as she brought her cup up to her mouth, taking a sip of the margarita and enjoying the perfectly bittersweet taste of it as her gaze just happened to look over Roslyn’s head. What she caught sight of, through the dancing people, had her eyebrows raising as she chuckled to Roslyn, “He definitely looks like the type to keep to himself.”

Roslyn’s eyebrows furrowed at her statement, turning around to follow Parker’s gaze. When she caught sight of what Parker saw, Rosyln let out a snort of a chuckle. They were both currently looking at Calum, seated on the couch with a cup in one hand while his left arm was wrapped around the shoulders of a leggy dark blonde, a flirtatious smile on her lips while he talked into her ear, whatever he was saying only making her grin widen and lean into him more.

“He is,” Roslyn responded with a dismissive roll of her eyes, looking back at Parker with a shrug of her shoulders. “That’s just Violet, his flavor of the month. By the time the next party rolls around, it’ll be a different girl.”

Lips pressing together, Parker nudged them downwards at the information, acknowledging it with a thoughtful hum. But when her eyes flickered back to the sight across the room, all the way on the other side, she felt the faintest twists in her stomach as she watched Calum’s finger graze up and down Violet’s arm, still speaking into her ear as if he was sharing a deep secret. They looked comfortably lost in their own bubble, no acknowledgment to the party around them as her right hand reached up to touch the side of his face as his lips remained by her ear.

Parker blamed the fact that the guy was so ridiculously attractive, because there was no other justifiable reason as to why she recognized that twist in her stomach as jealousy.

She felt her heart stop as Calum pulled away from Violet and, through the people moving between them, his dark eyes met her blue. Their gazes locked, and Parker felt the breath catch in her throat as he leaned back where he sat, Violet occupied by talking to some girl, and Calum’s attention seemingly focused on Parker.

She tried to look away, to tune into whatever conversation Roslyn and Ashton were having with Sage and Xavier, but she felt herself freeze in place, like Calum’s dark eyed gaze was rendering her unable to move. The music was pounding in her ears, her focused attention on Calum making everything sound muffled, like cotton was stuffed in her ears, fighting to take a breath as she watched Calum raise his cup and take a sip of his drink—all the while staring at her over the rim.

Parker didn’t know him well enough, and it was driving her crazy that she couldn’t tell what he was thinking as he looked at her. Was he even thinking of her, or were his thoughts occupied by something else while his eyes decided to settle on something mundane in the meantime? It was unnerving, her body’s reaction to just his gaze, akin to what she had felt the night before when he just stared at her. Silent and observing and intense. And as he lowered the cup, lips parted ever so slightly as his jaw worked, still fucking looking, Parker forced herself to look away. To sip on her margarita and join in on the conversation going on right next to her. Anything to distract herself from the weighted stare of a man sitting across the room.

There was a party going on around her. That should be enough of a distraction.

So Parker drank and danced with her friends and housemates, meeting their friends and new people—including Michael, the guy who used to live at The Viridian and whose old room was now Parker’s, and his girlfriend Crystal, both of whom were sweet and friendly and down to take shots whenever anyone suggested them.

“Viridian fam! Gather ’round!” Roslyn’s voice shouted over the music at some point during the night, her loud voice clear and effective as while everyone else at the party did their own thing, the current residence of The Viridian gravitated towards her in the kitchen. Parker stood between Carina and Luke, just slightly tipsy, as she saw Calum approach leisurely, standing opposite of her as they all looked at Roslyn. Parker tore her gaze away from the dark haired man, looking at the dark haired girl, who was balancing a tray of shots despite not being completely sober. Some club remix was playing through the loft, screwing with Parker’s ears, as she watched Roslyn grin. “Alright! We’re gonna toast to the newest member of our lil’ family here, to welcome Parker to The Viridian. Grab a shot!”

Both Ashton and Luke let out boyish whoops, and Parker felt her face flush slightly at the unnecessary but sweet gesture as she grabbed one of the shot glasses, filled to the brim with some kind of vodka she knew would burn her throat. Everybody was all smiles, grabbing a glass and standing in a circle, and Parker’s gaze happened to flicker towards Calum once more as his ring clad fingers grabbed a glass.

Unlike everyone else, he wasn’t wearing much of a smile, and Parker’s analyzing mind couldn’t help but wonder if it had something to do with her—something personal that Calum held against her. He stood tall, in an all black ensemble complete with a leather jacket on top—she didn’t understand how he could wear that, since her entire body felt flushed with heat—but he just looked so good. And unlike when she first met him getting out of the pool, his dark hair was set perfectly atop his head in curls that brushed along his forehead, and not for the first time that night did Parker feel the desire to run her fingers through them.

He stood there, effortlessly stunning, his mere presence capable of catching everyone’s attention. It had been difficult, trying to avoid him throughout the night, seeing as he demanded to be noticed and everywhere Parker looked her eyes seemed to find him. And sometimes, she’d catch him staring back, face clean of any type of expression that would give away his thoughts, that only left Parker tightly frustrated. His lack of reactions only made her feel as though he didn’t want her there. And while the thought was discomforting—she didn’t even know why she cared what he thought—she tried not to let it get to her. Too much.

Even as everyone raised their glasses in the middle to cheers, Calum didn’t even bother with a smile, looking perfectly stoic. And even when everyone exclaimed, “To Parker!” Calum’s lips barely moved, his eyes remaining on the glasses as a way of making sure his gaze didn’t wander. His mouth was pressed together, jaw tight and the muscles moving, with eyes looking void of any emotion that she couldn’t help but think was too intense of a non-reaction than the situation called for.

Parker tried not to let it get to her. Tried not to feel too affected to some guy’s indifference towards her because it didn’t matter—no matter how confusing and annoying and nagging it was. Instead, she clinked her glass with an appreciative smile on her face for everyone else around her, swallowed down the vodka that burned her throat, and tried to have a good time.

Even if one of her housemates was making it painfully obvious she wasn’t entirely welcomed.

*****

Calum rinsed out his mouth, spitting out the water after brushing his teeth as he stood straight in front of the mirror, eyes on his reflection. His cheeks were ever so slightly flushed from the hot shower he took, dark strands messily sitting on his head as he reached up to fix them as best as he could. One of the showers behind him was still running, though the sound was almost calming, being the only thing he could hear in the quiet of The Viridian. Almost everyone was already out for the day, Calum was sure, save for whoever was in the shower. No matter how long he lived here, he never made it a point to converse with anyone while in the shower or toilet—some moments were just meant to be private.

But then the shower cut off as Calum rubbed his hand down his face, scratching at his stubbly chin as he considered shaving. However, his thoughts only last a second, because the shower curtain right behind him slid open, the rings on the rod zinging in the quiet of the bathroom, and Calum felt his heart stop before feeling it drop to the pit of his stomach when he caught sight of the woman in the reflection.

Throat drying, Calum remained perfectly rigid where he stood, watching as Parker froze with one arm still holding the curtain when her eyes landed on the only other person in the room. The blue of her eyes was bright under the lights of the bathroom, blonde hair appearing darker as the wet strands fell just a little bit past her shoulders, and Calum felt an unknown lurch in his chest when he took in the freckles that decorated her prettily flushed face. So many all over, and he didn’t understand where the sudden urge to take his time and count every single one of them came from.

Parker stood there, just in a peach colored towel wrapped around her, showing off the milky, freckled skin of her collarbones and neck, just as unmoving as Calum was, yet the overhead light still glinted against the thin silver nose ring she had pierced. But she could notice the way his dark eyes trailed the length of her figure just through the reflection, noticed the clench of his jaw as he did so, and Parker felt her cheeks flush even more than they already were from her hot shower. Not because she was shy about a guy so openly checking her out—but because she was pretty sure her and Calum were at some type of odds yet the look in his eye said the opposite.

Swallowing the dryness from her throat, Parker approached the sink to Calum’s left, two already in between them as she grabbed the bottle of lotion she had kept there before hopping into the shower. She kept her gaze from drifting over to him, standing in front of the mirror with pursed lips and hyper aware of the man to her right as she rubbed the floral scented lotion on her arms. It was difficult to ignore him; not when he stood tall with straightened shoulders and tattoos inking his golden skin while the only thing both of them were wearing were towels.

But above all else, what was bothering Parker the most was his attitude towards her. She hadn’t been able to shake away the image of him looking at her during the party, like he didn’t want to welcome her the way everyone else living here did, and it kind of stung. Parker didn’t care if people didn’t like her—as a surgeon, she implemented the belief that as long as she saved a life, she didn’t care too much for the patient’s opinion of her—but most people did return a smile when she offered one. Most people didn’t just seemingly dislike her for no reason. And that’s exactly what Calum, in her opinion, was doing.

“What’s your problem with me?” Clearly, she didn’t care much for having a filter in this moment, turning to face Calum as she crossed her arms over her chest, mindful of the towel tightly wrapped around her. Calum merely glanced at her from his peripheral, not even a proper look. Parker’s jaw tightened briefly, eyebrows drawing together. “I barely know you and have rarely seen you in the two days I’ve been here, but whenever I do, you look like I’m some kind of intruder here. What’s the issue?”

She had a bit of a habit of being straightforward and blunt. Right now, though, Parker wasn’t entirely sure if that was a trait she was proud of.

The muscle in Calum’s strong jaw worked as he looked down to put on a silver bracelet on his left wrist before picking up a necklace resting on the sink and putting it around his neck without needing to unclasp it. “The issue here, sweetheart,” Calum spoke up, clear and condescending as he finally turned to face Parker, unimpressed and bored. “Is that you basically are an intruder. Everyone can welcome you with open arms and say you’re part of the family, but just because you occupy a room, doesn’t mean you are. You’ve got to earn your place.”

His words brought a frown to Parker’s face, insulted and hurt. She understood the people who already lived here being close, they obviously knew each other a lot longer, but it wasn’t like Parker arrived with the motive of trying to break into their group. All she wanted was a place to live, that’s it. They were a tight knit group, she got that, but Calum’s indifferent hostility didn’t seem warranted in Parker’s eyes.

“Earn it?” she repeated, letting her own irritation seep into the mild disbelief in her voice, scoffing as she raised an eyebrow. She almost laughed. She couldn’t help but think how ridiculous and juvenile this was. It wasn’t even that serious if everyone else who lived at The Viridian had given her a warm and friendly welcome—it was just Calum who had a problem. And she didn’t see why. The mocking tone slipped into her voice as she gave a tilt of her head. “Would you like me to complete some kind of rite of passage?”

Something changed in Calum’s dark eyes, just then. She saw it in the way he narrowed them ever so slightly at her, his tense posture relaxing ever so slightly as his chin lifted. And just like that, the air in the room shifted, a different kind of tension mixing in with the slight humidity as Parker felt a delicious kind of twist in her stomach as she kept her gaze fixed on Calum. On the way his tattoos were in bare view for her to admire, on his damp dark hair that he had tried to push back but left a few haphazard strands to do their own thing, and on the faint trail of hair going from his belly button and disappearing under the dark blue towel wrapped around him.

Parker’s skin suddenly felt hot, knowing that he was watching her exactly in the way she was watching him, eyes drinking in everything they could, and as smart as she was, she couldn’t figure out how quickly the air in the room changed.

Especially when Calum’s raspy, taunting voice hummed back, “That’s exactly what you need to do.”

Her heart jumped, his words stirring something right in the pit of her stomach as her throat worked, trying to quickly adjust herself to the heat in the room that no longer emitted from the hot showers they’d taken. “Which would be what?”

The suggestive tone Parker’s voice took wasn’t lost on either of them, only serving to add to the newfound tension in the room. Her words were accompanied by her taking a few steps towards Calum, slow yet purposeful and laced with intent. Her blue eyes never left Calum’s brown, and the intensity and fire she could see in them so clearly only fueled the desire running through her veins. It was dizzying how the aura around them changed, how the clench in Calum’s jaw went from seemingly being aggravated with her to something so much more animalistic. The same kind of pining that was incessantly drawing Parker closer and closer to him as the distance between them decreased.

He gazed down at her, dark eyes eating her up as his figure loomed over her. It was just them, right here, right now. And neither were ready to walk out of the room without getting what they both suddenly, so intensely, wanted.

Calum’s lips quirked in the subtlest of smirks, gaze flickering to her mouth suggestively. “Surprise me.”

Oh, she didn’t even hesitate.

Her lips met his heatedly, pouring every bit of intensity her body was tight with yet it still didn’t ease as Calum instantly kissed her back, their lips moving together frantically, desperately. Parker’s hands found Calum’s face, pulling him into her as the sharp lines of his jaw pressed into her palms and his hands tightly gripped her hips through the obstructive material of the towel, chests pressed together as Calum didn’t hesitate in slightly biting down on her lower lip. He drew a quiet moan out of her, just like he wanted, using it to his advantage to allow his tongue to deepen the kiss.

Hearts were beating wildly within chests to keep up with the fiery desire they kissed and grabbed at each other with, and Calum could already feel his head spinning in the best of ways at the floral scent of Parker’s lotion washing over him. They weren’t close enough, his lust driven mind decided, and knowing the layout of the bathroom like the back of his hand, Calum used his grip on Parker’s hips to walk her backwards. She easily complied, trusting him to guide her, gasping slightly when the towel around her body was roughly pulled away and her exposed back was being pressed against the cool tiles of the shower wall, bare chest against Calum’s own warm one.

She gasped against his mouth, arching her back off the wall slightly as she quietly hissed, “Too cold.”

Calum chuckled against her, the sound low and throaty, though he kissed her fervently, one hand leaving her now bare hips and Parker heard the zing of the shower curtain closing. And then, a moment later, the beginning hiss of the shower before pleasantly hot water cascaded down on them, a surprised breath hitching Parker’s throat as she was, once again, under the shower. A soft moan muffled against Calum’s lips as his fingers dug into her skin, their bodies impossibly close, feeling the lack of his own towel against her as the hot water instantly, gloriously, warmed her up more than she already was. Parker’s hands greedily ran across his body; up his arms and sides and back, feeling his smooth wet skin against hers as the soft yet greedy touch of his lips on hers left her dizzy.

The spray of the shower drowned out the sounds of their gasps and groans, Calum’s lips leaving Parker’s as he trailed hot kisses down her jaw, her eyes remaining closed at the sensation of his stubble scratching at her skin. She preferred the burn of that over the burn of the water as Calum’s lips worked on her neck, feeling his smirk on her skin when he felt her racing pulse under his mouth.

When his lips found hers once again, the water heating up their bodies, Calum brushed his lips over her kiss swollen ones, right hand teasingly sliding up the inside of her left thigh and slowly getting close to where Parker needed him desperately. “Your heart racin’ for me, doll?” Calum whispered, lips brushing against hers with each word, watching her with hooded eyes as she leaned her head back against the tiled wall.

Parker’s blue eyes, dark with desire for him, remained on Calum’s lips, chest moving steadily, quickly, at each drag of his fingers towards her anticipating entrance, other hand gripping her hip and keeping her against the wall. The rasp in his voice twisted Parker’s stomach, gaze flickering up only slightly to see the way his dark hair stuck to his forehead under the water, noticing droplets run down the curve of his sharp jaw and glitter against his supple lips.

She was reminded, in that moment, of the first night she saw Calum, getting out of the pool and soaked to the bone. In front of her right now, just as soaked, but completely naked and bare, had electricity sparking in her veins once more, had her fighting for air because of how ridiculously gorgeous she was. So Parker raised her right hand, index and middle fingers wrapping around the necklace he wore before using her grip on the chain to pull him even closer than he was.

Lips curling into a smirk, Parker murmured, “My heart’s racing because it’s not pumping enough blood.” Her words were quick to register in Calum’s head, his previous expression melting into one of understanding amusement, the mirth dancing in his eyes as he let out a scoff through his own smirk. Parker’s nose brushed against his, unable to keep her smirk from transforming into a grin, the surgeon in her jumping out just to tease. “Tachycardia is no joke.”

Calum’s chest sank with the heavy, amused breath he let out, giving a shake of his head as he breathed, “Shut up, doc,” before silencing her mouth with his.

All jokes flew out of Parker’s head as his tongue met hers, moaning into Calum and nails digging into his shoulders when his finger slid inside her without warning. Calum groaned against her, whether it was because of the way her nails were marking his skin or feeling her around his digit, Parker didn’t know, her heart stuttering when added another one while continuing his motions. The drag of his fingers was enough to curl Parker’s toes, breath shallowing as she was hyper aware of only Calum; the minty taste of him, his wet skin against hers, long fingers intimately grazing her to entice her closer to the edge.

“Not yet, doll,” Calum muttered against her lips, minutes later, when he could just feel Parker beginning to lose any sense of control. He enjoyed the complaining whine that left her as she felt him remove his fingers, breath stuttering as she watched him lick them clean and taste her mixed in with the water. The sight was sinful, with his tongue making an appearance between plump lips and eyes never leaving hers as he enjoyed the taste of her, and Parker’s desperate breathing was replaced by a choked gasp when his fingers swiftly grabbed the back of her thighs to lift her, the excited not in her stomach never ceasing. His movements were quick yet careful, not wanting to slip under the spray of water, as Calum wrapped Parker’s legs around his hips and moved her so her back was against the back corner of the shower. His eyes met hers just then, questioning as he tried to restrain himself long enough to breathlessly ask, “Can I—”

Parker’s hands gripped his biceps, finally being able to feel the muscles under her touch as she responded, breath just as stolen as Calum’s, “On the pill.” She let out a blissed out laugh, the sound easing Calum’s heart more than he cared to admit as she added, “I’m a doctor. I’m prepared. Please.”

She was driving him crazy in the best way.

They were still under the water, slightly so, as the sounds of their satisfied groans mixed in together sinfully when Calum eagerly slid in. Parker’s eyes squeezed shut, head tilted back as Calum admired the part of her pretty lips and the droplets of water running down the column of her throat and line of her jaw. He stilled, giving her a moment to adjust, to get used to the delicious stretch of his cock as he felt her left hand dig her nails into his shoulder. She felt good, so fucking good, and Calum could’ve collapsed from the aching need to move if she hadn’t finally let out a needy, breathy hiss of, “Please, fuck, do something.”

He needed to feel her lips again, mouth slanting over hers in a sloppy kiss as his hips snapped into hers, finally being able to fuck the frustration that burned him into her. The frustration of thinking about the softness of her lips and the blue of her eyes and the smoothness of her skin and how fucking good she must feel against, around, on him. And he was finally feeling it because he couldn’t fucking keep it together. Because he’d let himself give into the instant attraction he’d felt for Parker despite his decision of rejecting it, rejecting her, harshly.

Her teeth teasingly, greedily, bit into his lower lip and Calum could feel himself losing it. He was losing himself in her and for now, he let it happen.

Right hand still holding her up with the support of the wall behind her, Calum never ceased the movements of his hips, each drag of his cock between her walls throwing him further and further into the thought of Parker. And so his left hand grabbed her right, pulling it up above their heads, fingers lacing together, grips tight, as he held her arm up against the cold wall, feeling his bracelet slide a little lower on his wrist, and completely gave himself to her, just like she was doing with him. For now, he lost himself in her intoxicating kisses, in the sounds she made that were prettier than any song he’s ever heard, and in the way her skin deliciously burned against his that made him tighten his grip on her hand and made him frantically want more.

The aftermath was something he’d concern himself with later.

*****

“Hey!” Parker’s gaze wandered to the kitchen where Carina’s voice sounded, rounding the counter to get a better look at Parker, who just entered through the foyer. She noticed the green eyed girl was dressed in a cute baby blue colored bathing suit, in her hand a bag of Lays. “If you’re not too tired, everyone’s hanging out on the roof. You should join us. We’ve got drinks and snacks,” she added in a melodic tone as a way of enticing Parker, both girls letting out a few giggles at that.

A dip in the pool actually did sound like an amazing idea, the mere thought of the cool water on her overworked body seeming heavenly. Her shift had been long, though Parker had managed to sneak in a nap in one of the on call rooms between surgeries after making sure her interns were on top of things, so she wasn’t that tired to crash into bed. Besides, the sun was high up in the sky and it was warm out, perfect for a swim that she couldn’t pass up.

“I’ll be up in a few,” Parker smiled at Carina, who let out a cute “yay!” before running up the stairs to head back out. Entering her room, Parker put away her things and used the bathroom before changing into a bathing suit of her own, throwing a cover up over the black bikini before going up the stairs. The closer she got to the top, the clearer she could hear music playing, mixed in with the sounds of everyone talking.

Stepping onto the roof, Parker grinned when she heard a chorus of greetings, waving back at her housemates who were either lounging on chairs or the ledge of the roof or in the pool. Settling herself on the edge of the pool after kicking her slippers off, Parker dipped her feet into the cool water as Ashton, who stood by a makeshift bar, called out to her, “Do you want a margarita, Parker?”

She looked at him over her shoulder, grinning, “How can I ever say no to that?”

He giggled in response, a sound Parker didn’t think she’d ever get tired off, as she moved her feet around in the water. The sun felt nice on her skin, the music playing through a speaker drowning out the sounds of L.A. traffic from below as Parker watched Michael, his girlfriend Crystal, Roslyn and Luke play a round of volleyball with an inflatable ball in the pool. However, as she watched, Parker’s gaze wandered across the pool, right to the glass walled bedroom that was currently hidden from view because of the drawn curtains.

Calum’s absence was something Parker noticed almost immediately upon stepping out onto the roof, missing amongst her housemates. It was unnerving how, after that morning in the bathroom, she couldn’t stop herself from thinking about him. Only three days had passed, but Parker’s body was physically yearning for his touch once more. Aching to feel his lips against hers, on her skin, to taste him and feel the muscles of his body press against hers deliciously. His touch had burned into her, leaving imprints of where he’d been, of where she wanted him again.

Parker could barely focus, as if all she could think of was feeling him again. So instead she distracted herself with surgeries because in the O.R., the only thing she focused on was the patient. Nothing else. Especially not Calum Hood.

She’d only told Sage about what happened, about how she and Calum somehow lost every sense of control and could only think of losing themselves in each other. Her best friend had been proud of her antics even though Parker said it was only a one time thing. Sage very much doubted that, which only served to fluster Parker. She had no idea what Calum’s mindset was; spending most of her time at the hospital provided Parker some distance from Calum, though she wasn’t too sure if she was grateful for that or not. She yearned for his touch and it was unsettling how much of an effect he had on her after just one time.

He was mesmerizing, addictive. Parker had gotten a taste and she craved for more; she missed the softness of his lips and scratch of his scruff and the delicious way he fit into her so perfectly. How was she expected to just not want more?

Tearing her gaze from Calum’s room with a deep breath, Parker smiled at Ashton as he walked over to where she was sitting and handed her the glass of margarita. The cold drink felt good as she listened to everyone around her chattering and watched the volleyball game in front of her. The bittersweet taste wonderfully tickled her throat, lightly kicking her feet in the water as the game ended and cheers erupted from Luke and Roslyn over their victory.

“You feel good, champ?” Parker grinned at Luke, who pushed himself out of the pool to sit on the edge next to her.

He laughed, dimples appearing as his body glistened and dripped with water. Pushing the blonde hair away from his face, Luke answered with a puffed chest, “Hell yeah. I’m the king of volleyball, you know.”

Michael, who’d heard Luke’s statement, scoffed loudly from where he still was in the pool. “Winning one game doesn’t make you the king!” he exclaimed through a bemused laugh, not even hesitating to call Luke out on his bullshit.

Luke kicked a leg out in hopes of splashing Michael, though the green eyed man was too far away by the other end of the pool as Parker snickered at the childish antics. She engaged in a conversation with the blonde then as he asked about her job and she told him about the last tie she was in charge of running the E.R., which he thought was pretty awesome. Which it was—but also intense and exhausting, especially if it was overrun with patients who needed immediate assistance.

It was easy talking to Luke; he was all smiles and bright eyes, and Parker mentally made it a point to talk to him and her other housemates more. Being a senior surgical resident kept her busy, spending most of her time at the hospital, and while she’d moved into the Viridian a week ago, there was still room for her to get to know the people she was living with more.

Just as her thoughts began trickling into the dangerous territory of reminding her of just how well she’d gotten to know a certain roommate a few days ago—as if she could ever forget—Parker noticed the door on the other side of the pool open and out stepped a familiar leggy dark blonde. An uncomfortable twist in the pit of Parker’s stomach hitched her throat at Violet’s lazy smile and marked up neck and bikini clad body, looking far too satisfied, looking just like Parker probably had the other day for the same delirious reason.

But the discomfort in her stomach didn’t compare to the breathtaking dread that clogged Parker’s throat when Calum walked out behind her, fingers running through unruly curly hair as the sun rays reflected against his skin in a heavenly glow, only dressed in swimming trunks as his necklaces rested against his chest. He nodded in greeting once, directed at everyone, bare feet padding on the ground as his dark eyes took in who all was there. Parker’s grasp on her glass tightened when his brown eyes met her blue, his already leisure pace slowing down just a fraction, so subtle, when their gazes locked.

Parker’s throat worked, deaf to the world like there was cotton in her ears, noticing how, even from this distance, Calum’s jaw worked. His expression was unreadable, blank, as he continued walking and broke their gaze, not even a polite smile as he followed Violet to the makeshift bar where Ashton was.

But then Calum walked past where she and Luke sat, his gaze sliding over her head as some of the blankness from his face erased, softening into one of casualness as he lifted his chin in a quick nod to Luke. The action was accompanied by a greeting, “Hey, man.”

Luke returned the greeting, and Parker watched as Calum’s gaze went from his friend before shifting ahead once more as he continued his pace. And she was left, staring after him in indignant surprise, because he wasn’t even going to acknowledge her? Just stare from a distance and then if he was near her, she ceased to exist? Parker had never been treated so rudely before, no ounce of respect thrown her way, and she hated that it hurt. Hated that it stung that she wasn’t given something she was desperately seeking against her better judgement.

She hated that she felt a suffocating weight settle on her twisting stomach at his reaction—or, as usual, lack thereof. Calum kept going, as if nothing had changed between them since she moved to the Viridian, as if he hadn’t had her pressed against the wall with lips muffling her moans as he drove himself deeper and deeper into her just a few days ago. With a tight throat, Parker forced herself to drink her beverage, fighting the urge to turn and follow Calum’s movements to the bar behind her, not wanting to appear as some kind of longing, kicked puppy.

The fact that his ignorance of her even stung bothered Parker. Perhaps she was justified—she would at least acknowledge the existence of someone she’d slept with, especially if they were living together. But then again, maybe she should’ve known better. There had already been some kind of tension existing between her and Calum—sleeping with him probably wasn’t the best and most effective of solutions. But it just happened. That’s all Parker could say to somehow justify it, if possible. What happened between her and Calum had just happened and it left her dizzy and wanting more—despite the fact that he continued to look at her the same way he had since she moved to the building.

“Kinda cold.”

Blinking back into reality, Parker turned her head to look at Luke, who’d been following Calum with his eyes before he looked down at Parker with an almost apologetic raise of his eyebrows. Parker blinked, her own eyebrows drawing together at that, realization coming slow yet not entirely sure if he meant what she was thinking. Hoping it wasn’t. “What?”

Luke ticked his head to where Calum was, eyes flickering to the brunette before looking back at Parker. “Him ignoring you like that after what happened. Not cool.”

Raising her eyebrow, for a second Parker considered Luke was maybe talking about something completely different, but she knew there wasn’t anything else. Honestly—she didn’t care who knew, although she didn’t want it to be made into a big deal. She had just moved into the Viridian and the last thing she wanted everyone to talk about was how she already hooked up with one of the guys. Knowing about it was one thing, but gossiping about it was completely different.

Luke didn’t look like he was judging her or anything, didn’t really look like he was viewing her in a different light. But that’s not what stuck to Parker—it was how he knew. She surely hadn’t said anything, and she knew no one else was in the loft when she and Calum hooked up, so there really was only one explanation.

Parker’s eyebrows shot up as she quickly put two and two together, glancing around briefly before leaning into Luke, her voice a quiet murmur as she asked in surprise, “He told you?”

He shrugged his broad shoulders while taking a sip of his beer, throat working as he swallowed and licked his lips before looking back at Parker, who was gazing up at him in taken aback confusion. For some reason, she didn’t think Calum would bring it up to anyone, unsure why she would think he’d keep quiet about it. Although, maybe it was because of just how much of a silent person he was. How he seemed to keep to himself—at least when Parker was around.

But they weren’t friends. And Parker didn’t really know him.

“He may have mentioned it,” Luke admitted with a nod, leaning back on his hands as his blue eyes remained on hers. When Parker’s eyes remained raised, nodding her head as if to get more out of him, Luke smiled apologetically. “That’s all he said, honestly. I would think he’d be more of a gentleman and not do it in the bathroom but I guess raging hormones were too powerful.”

Parker’s face flushed at this, pursing her lips together and hoping to suppress the flustered smile that threatened to tug at the corners. Part of her hoped that that’s all Calum said; that they hooked up, and that’s it. Maybe then it would justify why he’s just ignoring her at this moment. Even though Parker hated that she was even bothered in the first place that he was pretending as if it never happened. It was, annoyingly enough, kind of embarrassing.

Not to mention confusing. Utterly bewildering. She wasn’t even sure what to feel, what she was justified to feel. It had been a one time thing. And no matter how badly she wished for it to happen again, Parker would have to come to terms with the possible fact that Calum didn’t want the same thing. Not when he had Violet.

“It’s whatever,” Parker shrugged with a shake of her head, in that moment wanting to forget about everything. Her feelings were hurt, she understood, but it was her own fault for even having that seed of wonder of something more happening. They’d fucked, once, in the bathroom in a mess of breathless gasps and clinging fingers. Why would there be more after that? She offered a close mouthed smile to Luke, one she wouldn’t even believe if she saw, but Parker didn’t care enough to make it seem real. Or maybe she cared too much. She wasn’t sure. “Just a one time thing, honestly.”

Luke looked at her, blue eyes bright under the sun, a softness taking over his features that made him appear almost angelic. In a quiet voice, he asked, “Then why do you sound so disappointed?”

Parker pursed her lips, the smile diminishing as her gaze flickered past Luke and right to where Calum was. She didn’t understand why she felt so attached after a single fling, why it had to be Calum of all people she somehow couldn’t find herself moving past. She was a surgeon, for fuck’s sake; moving forward was what she was trained to do. But Parker’s eyes were on Calum, sitting at the end of a beach chair, legs spread so Violet could sit in between. The familiar twist tightened Parker’s stomach, watching as Violet’s hair was over her right shoulder and Calum, with one hand nursing a beer, mouthed at her neck as she leaned back into him with a lazy smile returning to her face.

It wasn’t normal, was it, to feel the burn of jealousy in her veins at the sight of a guy who she didn’t even think liked her, a guy who she hooked up with once, put his lips on the skin of someone that wasn’t her? It wasn’t normal to feel the yearning tightness in her chest at the desire of wanting him maybe once more, twice more? Why the hell was she so stuck on him?

Maybe because he was so outrageously handsome. Or that his lips were made for kissing. Or that the sex had been so mind blowingly fantastic that Parker had dreams about it, about the words he’d said and the sounds he made. Or that he was just so frustratingly intriguing that Parker couldn’t stop thinking about him.

Or maybe she was just an idiot of a masochist for feeling herself start to fall for someone she slept with once, who’d been an ass to her even after the fact, and she was doing nothing to stop it.

Suddenly dark brown eyes locked with Parker’s blue, and she felt the breath in her throat hitch sharply and a shiver from the cool water race up her spine at his blank, handsome face. She watched as Calum took a sip of his beer, eyes never leaving hers in the distance, watched as the ever so light breeze made the few curls across his forehead partake in a gentle dance. And then she watched, with blood frozen in her veins and a lump forming in her throat, the sight bothering Parker so much more than it should, as Calum slid one tattooed arm around Violet’s bare waist and pulled her even closer to him purposefully. His purposeful, daring eyes never left Parker’s.

Oh, wow. He was an asshole.

How he could go from being so attentive and giving like he had been in the bathroom and switching to an intentionally indifferent jerk was beyond Parker.

She looked at Luke, a soft scoff escaping her nose as a self deprecating smile tugged at her lips, lifting her near empty glass while answering his question with a defeated, “I have no fucking idea.”

*****

He kept looking towards the door. Or, at least, tried to since the view of it was a bit obscured from where he sat in the V.I.P. section of the club, booked by Carina’s parents in honor of her twenty-fifth birthday. He sat in the middle of the red half circle couch, left arm spread on the top while his right hand gripped his third glass of whiskey, holding it on his knee as he tried to look at the faces entering the club through the crowds of people and colorful flashes of light.

It was frustrating, how the moment he stepped into the club, Calum’s dark eyes were searching for Parker, hoping to catch sight of her eyes blues through the pleasant lighting of the club, grateful that it wasn’t too dark. The music was pounding in his ears and his chest, but Calum was too focused on trying to sense Parker’s presence to even acknowledge what song was playing that his friends were dancing and singing along to. So he just sat, feeling the alcohol course through his system and the warmth of the club stick to his skin, all the while waiting for Parker’s arrival.

“You’ve been sitting since we got here.” Violet’s pouting voice reluctantly dragged Calum out of his thoughts, forcing his gaze to break from the door to look at the girl sitting to his right. She wasn’t technically invited to Carina’s party, the birthday girl choosing only to bring close friends including her housemates, but Violet was there as Calum’s plus one. And for the first time, he was regretting her company. His eyes didn’t even take in the skin she was showing in her short tight dress which showed off her long legs and hugged her chest. Feelings for Violet never existed in Calum’s heart, but even so, the last thing on his mind was taking her home with him. That was different and unnerving. She gripped his arm, giving it a squeeze as she leaned into him and offered a smile. “Come on—let’s dance.”

He remained seated, teeth pressing together as his gaze dropped to Violet’s hand sliding down his arm towards his hand. Calum’s grip on the glass tightened as her fingers neared his wrist, knowing that she could feel his muscles tensing under touch. His breath was held in his lungs, almost painfully so, and it wasn’t until Violet’s fingers almost reached his around the glass did Calum force himself to his feet. The sudden action startled Violet, looking up at him with raised eyebrows, as Calum downed the rest of his beverage.

“I need another drink,” he excused gruffly, briefly wondering if his words were drowned out by the music, though not caring as he began walking to the bar on the other side of the dance floor. Calum didn’t even pause to hear what Violet said in response, taking a breath as he shouldered through people with pursed lips and a tense back.

He was basically running away from Violet and it was all because of Parker. Because for the past week, he couldn’t seem to get the blonde out of his mind, couldn’t seem to satiate the animalistic desire of wanting to press his skin against hers in any way. Violet was just a crutch, a familiar warm body in place of the one he’d been able to have once. Calum had thought maybe, if he eased whatever the fuck he felt for Parker just once, then it would be fine. That he’d be able to have a taste and that would be it.

The last thing he expected was to crave her even more.

Being unable to see Parker around the Viridian so much was both a blessing and a curse; whatever he felt for her seemed to calm when her presence wasn’t nearby, but as soon as she walked into view, it was like Calum couldn’t breathe because of the distance between them. The need to be near her, to hold her again and feel her lips on his was almost maddening, and it was fucking terrifying. Such an intense desire, need, yearning for someone had never been something Calum experienced before.

It was dizzying and perplexing and left Calum laying in bed staring at the grey ceiling of his bedroom at night, wondering just how Parker managed to get such an overwhelming grasp on his thoughts. How one moment—one tantalizing, blissful moment—had taken over Calum’s mind without warning. Work and sleeping with Violet didn’t do much to distract him, nothing did. And it was so damn frustrating.

He’d see her around the loft and he’d just. . . Lose his breath. It had happened right on the first night, right when he met her after getting out of the pool. Calum remembered the image perfectly, with Parker standing on the roof with a glass of wine in hand and blonde hair dancing in the light breeze, blue eyes bright just like the city lights around them. Part of him had hoped, in that moment, that she was some girl Luke had brought home and she’d just found her way to the roof. Because then, maybe, Calum wouldn’t feel the instant, snapping attraction that hit him so hard that he felt as though he was drowning in the very pool he’d just gotten out of.

Was that even possible? To take one look at someone and want them in that same moment?

With someone as beautiful as Parker, Calum didn’t doubt it.

Right hand splayed on the bar top, Calum waited for the bartender to give him his drink as he turned sideways, body involuntarily facing the door as his left hand ran through his dark curls, a heavy breath escaping him. He tugged at the curls at the back of his head, eyes washing over the faces all around him as they blurred together while hoping to find the one he’d been searching for.

What was he even supposed to do if he found it?

Mumbling a thanks to the bartender, Calum’s hand wrapped around the glass right when his eyes landed on exactly what he’d been looking for. He paused, the glass midway to his mouth, as he watched with a still heart Parker enter the club. Feeling his breath hitch in his throat, Calum’s eyes tracked her through the crowd, greedily drinking in the sight of the white crop top and leather skirt she wore, blonde hair tied up as her blue eyes searched for familiar faces in the busy club. Even from a distance, Calum’s throat dried at how gorgeous she looked, at the glow of her creamy skin against the lights, wanting to feel it under his fingers and lips.

Then those blue eyes met his brown, and Calum remained perfectly still. He watched the subtle raise of her shoulders as she took in a breath while looking at him, lips parting ever so slightly. Was she going to walk over? Did he want her to?

Why the hell did she confuse the shit out of him?

Parker walked from around one of the raised platforms where a couple of people were dancing and Calum watched as she headed in the opposite direction of where he stood. He knew he had no reason to be disappointed, that he’d been acting like a complete asshole to her and so why would she approach him? Yet still he felt his grip on the glass tighten, watching her go and feeling a discomforting twist in his stomach as she walked away from him. It was his own doing, Calum was aware, and not for the first time did Calum want to punch himself for it.

That desire got stronger throughout the night as Parker kept her distance from Calum, only staying with everyone else but him as she danced and drank and enjoyed her night without him. And all he could do was sit by and watch, letting the alcohol mix in with his blood while he stewed in a pit of irritation and jealousy because she was laughing and smiling with everyone else and it was his fault that she wasn’t doing that with him.

Calum found home against a support beam, using it to keep him upright as he sipped a beer in place of the liquor he’d been drinking throughout the night. He felt warm thanks to his drinks, head feeling heavy and eyes slightly hooded as he watched Parker like he had been throughout the night. It was creepy, he figured, to keep his eyes on her so intensely, but he couldn’t fucking help himself. But she was right in front of him, her hands holding Roslyn’s as the two girls danced together, hips moving to the beat of the music and a happy smile on her face. So easily gorgeous, and Calum probably fucked it up royally with her.

“Stop staring and just talk to her.” Rolling his head to the side against the pillar, Calum caught sight of Luke leaning against it on the other side, blue eyes trained on who Calum was looking at. His blonde curls were wild, cheeks flushed as he too kept himself upright. There was a furrow between his brows as he continued drunkenly, almost drowsily, “It’s obvious you like her. Why’re you acting like such a douche, man? Pushing her away isn’t going to push away your feelings for her.”

Blowing out a soft raspberry, Calum leaned his head back, eyes lifting to look at his taller best friend. He could acutely feel the music drumming in his chest, lazily gripping his drink. “I hate when you become all insightful when you’re drunk.”

Luke rolled his eyes, twisting his lips to the side before retorting, “I hate when you try to ruin things for yourself because you’re scared of your own feelings.”

Jaw slacking, Calum let out a scoff before turning so he could lean against the pillar on his shoulder to properly look at Luke. He felt affronted at the blonde’s statement, despite the truth even his drunken mind could pick up on. Luke was right, because Calum did self sabotage, particularly when it came to relationships. Becoming close with someone was never something Calum was too good at, the fear of letting someone else have a piece of him, a big piece, preventing him from giving anyone any part of himself. And he was fine with that. Hell, he was good at it—a professional, basically.

Which is why whatever he felt for Parker—this mess of desire and want and just as emotional as it was physical—overwhelmed him with confusion because how could it happen? One minute he was fine and the next she was taking over him without even trying. That never happened before and he just. . . Didn’t know how to deal with it. Why was it so hard? Why did he make things difficult for himself? Why couldn’t he just allow for himself a shot at potential happiness without trying to ruin something before it even had a chance of starting?

Calum hadn’t even responded to Luke’s words before the blonde commented, “That must’ve been some good sex if she caught feelings for you after one time.” Then he hummed thoughtfully after taking a sip of his drink. “Or maybe she just really wants to fuck again.”

For a moment Calum felt his thoughts freeze at Luke’s words, eyes widening ever so slightly as he finally choked out, “I—Feelings? What feelings? She’s got feelings? Did she tell you that?”

He sounded uncharacteristically needy, desperate, as the words tumbled out of his mouth and it irked Calum but, shit, he didn’t care in this moment. All he could care about was Luke’s words, the insinuation of Parker having feelings for him even after the shitty way he’d treated her, of that small spark of hope that jump started his heart and had him pushing off the pillar to look at Luke with shot up eyebrows and widened eyes. Feelings. Did Parker have feelings? Still, after how he’d treated her? His heart was pounding and, shit, when did he become someone who cared so much for this?

“No,” Luke scoffed, amusement dancing in his eyes as he looked at Calum, lips curling at the frown that took over the brunette’s face. Offering a shrug, Luke continued, “But it’s obvious. And it’s obvious that you like her too. You’re always making these eyes at each other and I can never tell if it’s because you wanna declare your love or jump each other’s bones.”

Calum’s lips clamped shut, pouting drunkenly and defiantly as he glared at Luke. He did not appreciate the observation, making him feel as though he was being watched. Like his friend was watching him continuously act like an idiot because he couldn’t get his shit together. Because both he and Parker knew there was something there but Calum was an asshole who was pushing her away and she was too good to allow herself that kind of treatment, so she kept her distance. He didn’t blame her. He just was so pissed off at himself for it.

Eventually he found himself at the bar once more, though this time he managed to order himself a club freaking soda rather than indulging himself in more alcohol. The dizziness from the alcohol had him leaning his temple against the palm of his hand, arm propped by his elbow as he kept his eyes closed and let the music drum through his mind.

It was close to two in the morning and Calum was tired, wanted his bed and wanted the girl, but he remained on the stool at the bar. His friends were enjoying their night and he didn’t want to leave them. So he stayed. And he watched Parker dance. And maybe even stewed in a bit of self deprecation and hatred.

“Hi, can I get a margarita, please?”

Opening his eyes, Calum blinked against the flashing lights before his gaze settled on the girl that came up next to him. Calum’s back straightened, watching Parker lean forward on the bar, hands rhythmically tapping on the bartop as she waited for the bartender to get her drink. There was the ever slightest, thin layer of sweat sheening her skin and she looked like she was glowing against the lights, cheeks flushed and just a few of her freckles surfacing across the bridge of her nose and speckled some on her cheeks.

He remembered the way his lips trailed the sharp line of her jaw, wanting so badly to do so again as he rolled his lower lip into his mouth. Calum’s throat worked, eyes drinking in the sight of hers, and then her eyes met his. And then, to Calum’s surprise, instead of frowning or scoffing or turning away, Parker smiled.

A breathtaking, pretty smile that showed off white teeth as she turned her body to face his. “You look like you’re having the time of your life,” she commented, a giggle in her voice as she leaned on the bartop with her arm while her left hand rested on her hip.

Hiding the way he felt off guard at her starting a conversation, Calum swiveled in the stool to face her. She was only a couple of inches taller than him in her heels as he sat, blue eyes looking down at him. “Waitin’ to go home,” Calum answered truthfully, slowly. Her eyes were so pretty. With a small shrug and smile, he added, “Don’t wanna ruin anyone else’s fun.”

Parker raised an eyebrow, tilting her head as she gazed at him. “So you choose to make yourself miserable instead?”

Calum took a soft breath, looking her over as if it was the first time. Because she was so gorgeous and he wanted to get to know her. Yeah. He wanted to know her instead of jumping into bed with her again. He wanted to know her and then go from there. “I tend to do that a lot,” Calum responded, his speech slow thanks to the alcohol. Was it possible for the sight of someone else to sober him up? Parker took a breath at his words and Calum found himself asking, “What took you so long? Getting here?”

“I had surgery,” Parker answered with a hum. “And then had to take care of post-ops. Busy, busy, busy-bee,” she added with a happy grin, thanking the bartender for her drink before lifting it to take a sip through the straw.

“What was it?” Calum asked, genuinely curious as he blinked away some of the drunk fogginess. “How’d it go?”

Her smile widened and Calum tried not to focus on the way her body seemed to move closer to his, to notice the way her thighs pressed against his jean clad knees. “Colon ischemia,” she told him, nodding along to her own words. “Had to remove dead tissue in a dude’s colon. He’s in recovery now.”

A small smile tugged at Calum’s lips as he looked at her, catching the glint in her eyes as she went into some detail about the surgery, the alcohol in her system not inhibiting her from talking about it excitedly. And he listened over the sound of the music, took in the excitement she felt when she talked about something she loved and was good at. It unloaded something in his heart, the smile easing as he looked at the amazing, pretty girl. “You’re kind of a badass, aren’t you?” Calum admired, smiling, truthful.

There was a pinkness in her cheeks, probably matching whatever warmth he was feeling in his own at the sight of her. Fuck. She even made him blush.

And then she leaned in, hand gripping her drink and lips curling into a smirk. Even through the lights, Calum could pick out the freckles on her face under the makeup, could enjoy the glimmer in her eyes and whatever fruity scented perfume she was wearing. His heart was pounding in his ears, muffling the music, as his legs parted without thinking and she stepped in the space between them. Parker’s nose brushed against his and Calum breathed her in, shaky and unsure, wondering what the hell she was doing and knowing he wasn’t going to stop.

Her lips parted, pink and inviting, and she murmured, “I’m a superhero. And one of my superpowers is knowing you’re only talking to me because you’re drunk. Tomorrow, you’re gonna go right back to ignoring my existence, so I’m gonna walk away before you can hurt me more.”

Calum’s eyes widened ever so slightly, throat drying at Parker’s words that made his stomach lurch unpleasantly. He looked into her eyes, blue framed with long lashes, and Calum could make out the disappointment and hurt the supposed truth behind her words that weighed on her and he desperately wanted to get rid of it. Loathed that it was because of him it was even present in the first place.

So when Parker made a move to lean back and away from Calum, his hand found hers, fingers gripping her own as he held her in place, though his grip wasn’t tight. Just enough to keep her there but also so she could break away if she so desired. Parker paused, gaze dropping to their hands before looking back at Calum, questioning and reluctant. He could tell she was fighting her instinctive response of pulling away, lips pursing as she looked at him with a conflicting gaze. He hurt her with his behavior and Calum was still kicking himself for it. If she walked away right now, he wouldn’t blame her.

“I’m a piece o’ shit, I know.” Calum’s words were hasty, like he wanted to quickly get them out before she walked away but not lose any of the genuinity he meant his apology with. He stood to his feet, feeling just the slightest bit dizzy, as Parker’s eyes remained on his while she had to tilt her head back to maintain the gaze. Her throat worked as he towered over her, the minimal space between the stools on the bar forcing them to stand close together as the heat on their skin went from being caused by the buzzing club to their proximity. Looking down at her, Calum licked his lips, trying to put together the right, honest string of words while trying not to think too much about her hand in his. They’d held hands before, in the bathroom against the tiled walls of the shower, but it’d been different. “I’ve been actin’ like a dick and I’m sorry ’bout that, Parker.” The alcohol was making his words sound drowsy and slurred even to him, but Calum hoped the sincerity didn’t get lost. “’M not the best when it comes to dealin’ with certain things and I just—”

Parker pulled her hand from Calum’s, just as he had feared, stumbling ever so slightly as she took a step to her left and back from him. Her right hand gripped her glass, watching the defeat and disappointment that washed over Calum’s face against the light colored flashes of the club. The knot in his chest tightened at the loss of her skin against his, at the slight furrow in her eyebrow as she shook her head. “You’re apologizing because you’re drunk,” she decided after releasing a breath. “And maybe because you wanna fuck again and fill me with disappointment before you start ignoring me again.” Calum’s breath hitched at her words, eyes widening at the sting they snapped through his body as his body leaned back ever so slightly, as if she’d pushed him. Parker gave another shake of her head, eyebrows drawn together as she gave him a once over, a look filled with dismay and despondency. “Just—leave me alone, Calum.”

Then she was turning and walking away, disappearing into the crowd of people, and Calum was left with the aching desire of exchanging his fucking club soda with the harshest whiskey the bar had.

*****

“Fuck!”

Calum’s fingers instantly froze over the strings of the guitar, eyes widened in confusion flickering up to look at the glass paned wall of his bedroom, though his view to the outside world was obscured thanks to the curtains he’d drawn. For a moment, he wondered if he’d imagined the shout, fluttering unexpectedly through his mind as he enjoyed a quiet night with his guitar. And he’d have believed it, if it weren’t for the unmistakable sound of glass shattering that followed it—the sound that occured right outside of his room.

Getting up from his bed, Calum rested the guitar on the stand by the bedside table before approaching the glass wall, eyebrows drawn together as he strained his ears in hopes of hearing something else that would give him a clue as to what the hell was happening. Parting the curtain ever so slightly, Calum peeked a look outside, gaze darting around the empty roof under the night sky, wondering what it was that he had heard.

But then his eyes landed on the sight of Parker, hard to miss with her blonde hair, since that’s all Calum could see. Because she sat on the ground, back against the raised brick railing of the roof, forehead against her knees with her legs brought up to her chest. Under furrowed eyebrows Calum’s eyes narrowed as he tried to get a better look over the bright lights of the pool, back straightening and the creases in his forehead smoothening when he made out the shaking of Parker’s shoulders, of her body. Like she was crying.

He took a breath, pausing for just a moment as he considered what to do. But another look at Parker, at the way her entire body was trembling and how he had definitely heard something break just moments ago had him coming to a decision before he even let any other thought run through his mind.

Quietly, swiftly, he parted the curtains and opened the glass door of his room, stepping out with his slides on his feet as he cautiously made his way towards Parker. And over the hum of the cars in the city below, Calum could make out the broken, shaky sounds of Parker’s sobs, of her sniffles and choked breathing the closer he got to her seated figure. His heart twisted at the knowledge of her crying, walking around the pool to where she was, eyes catching the glint of glass and when he looked over, just a few feet away from where she sat, were different sized broken pieces of what he could make out as a wine glass. Or what was remaining of one, being able to figure it was that due to part of the handle that remained intact to a half broken base.

It was a bit chilly that night, the cool breeze raising goosebumps on Calum’s arms and legs, exposed to his T-shirt and athletic shorts as he hurried over to where the crying blonde was. “Parker,” Calum breathed, feeling something inside him crack at the clear sounds of her cries, crouching down to her right with his left hand against the brick wall and his right wanting to reach out to her, but unsure if he was allowed. Her hands were gripping knees, head bent and face out of his view, but visibly shaking. A bubble of panic started expanding in the pit of Calum’s stomach at the sight of her, unsure of what happened, unsure of what to do. “Parker, sweetheart, what’s wrong? What’s—” He shook his head, lost and wanting to help. “What’s happened?”

She kept crying. Kept sobbing into herself, either ignoring Calum or not even registering his presence. And that bubble of panic kept growing, a lump forming in his throat because the two of them hadn’t spoken in days but the absolute last thing Calum ever wanted was for Parker to be going through something so awful that she was crying like this. Crying like something terrible had happened. Crying like she’d lost some—

Oh. Shit. Calum hoped that wasn’t the case.

And then, a moment later, Parker’s thick, anguished voice finally said, “She was my first patient.” His heart stopped at her words, his fear being proven correct, as his eyebrows drew together in distress over her state and jaw clenched tightly. Parker lifted her head and despite the nighttime, Calum got a good look at her face, and he didn’t at all like what he saw. He didn’t like the redness of her nose or her eyes, the blue glazed behind pools of unshed tears as the rims of her eyes were lined red; raw and bruised from crying as hard as she was. The sight, undoubtedly, broke Calum’s heart, rendering him breathless from just how broken she looked, and how the only thing he wanted in this world right now was for her to not feel like this. The waves of her blonde hair framed her tear stricken face, lips trembling as her eyes met Calum’s worried brown. “One of my first days my intern year we—she needed an appy and I-I was given the first solo surgery to perform it. And she—she lived.”

The tears in her eyes and sobs in her throat had Parker stumbling over her words, voice scratchy and thick, having to pause to sniffle and catch her breath and Calum listened patiently. Listened with his lips pressed together and fighting the urge to pull her into his arms because she looked so heartbroken and he couldn’t stand it. And it was terrifying to him, how the sight of her was absolutely breaking his heart more than he ever thought possible, more than one would justify. But he couldn’t give a shit. She was hurting, and not for the first time, Calum wanted to make it better, whether it was his fault or not.

Parker blinked, looking away from Calum for a moment as she licked her lips, trying to get her thoughts together. “She—Joanna was my patient for three—” The last word came out breathless, like she ran out of whatever little air she had left, neck tensing as she regained her breathing, all the while looking out at the pool in front of her. “Three years and I was her doctor whenever she came in. One of her doctors but still. “I-I took out her appendix and—and treated her when she got in a car accident last year and helped deliver her baby yesterday and now she’s—she’s gone and we should’ve saved her. I should’ve saved her.”

She broke down. Completely, utterly crumpled in front of Calum’s eyes as the sobs that escaped her strengthened with the help of her heartbreak. Parker’s eyes clenched shut as more tears escaped, body shuddering with her cries and Calum instantly wrapped his left arm around her shoulders, pulling her in and letting her rest her head against his chest as his other hand buried itself in her hair.

He could feel every cry of hers just as well as he could hear it, holding her close and shutting his own eyes as her grief washed over him. Not as severely as she felt it, but Parker going through it was enough for Calum to feel a suffocating tightness in his chest and strengthen his own hold on her. And her understood, selfishly for the first time, that Parker probably lost people in her line of career, that there were just some that died on her watch and she could do nothing about it except for grieve and then fight to never make the same mistake twice.

And holding her right now, in this period of heart wrenching mourning, Calum rested his chin atop her head, the faint scent of her fruity shampoo washing over him, and let her cry into his shirt. He felt her fist his shirt in her grasp, felt her clutch onto him desperately as she ached over the loss of someone important to him. And he hated that he couldn’t do anything to help except hold her to him.

“Parker, you—” Calum cut himself off, unsure of what to say, unsure of what were the right words because he didn’t know if there were any. He opened his eyes, taking a breath as he looked up at the dark cloudless sky with a few stars glittering across. “I’m sure you did everythin’ you could’ve—”

“I should’ve worked harder,” she whimpered, shaking her head before pulling away from him, red eyes and red nose and flushed cheeks that were all breaking Calum’s heart further. How she managed to get such a tight hold on him, he had no idea, but he didn’t question it. Not right now. Her hands pressed against his chest, putting some distance as she continued, “Should’ve looked at her tests and should’ve picked it up sooner—”

“Parker, Parker,” Calum cut her off, his voice raspy in his own desperation as his hands found her freckled, tear splattered cheeks. His thumbs wiped away what he could, feeling the softness of her cry-blotched face as he got her to look at him, his throat working at the redness of her face. Ignoring the tickles of his own curls across his forehead, Calum cleared his throat lightly as their faces neared, holding her close. “You did everythin’ you could’ve,” he repeated, stronger and surer this time. He couldn’t be sure, he knew, but he believed it. “You’re in pain and you’re grieving and it’s just making you blame yourself. Please, don’t. You just—you need rest, okay? This isn’t helpin’ you. Don’t do this to yourself, sweetheart, please.”

She’d been crying for hours, he knew—could tell from the state of her eyes and the hoarseness of her voice—and so he wanted her to just stop for now. Wanted her to be able to take a breath and close her eyes and be able to sleep despite the heaviness in her soul. Even if she disagreed, even if she began shaking her head as she understood his words and closed her eyes, trying to pull away, but he kept his hold. “Sleep, please, it’ll—”

“It won’t bring Joanna back,” her voice cracked, shoulders sinking as she sniffled.

“Neither will this,” Calum told her, swallowing the thickness in his own throat, keeping his dark eyes on her blue. “Neither will sittin’ out here making yourself sick over somethin’ like this.”

She was quiet for a few moments, the only sounds coming from the still awake city below and the occasional sniffles she was trying to get control over, glassy eyes looking out at the pool as she considered Calum’s words. He looked at her, patiently and worriedly, chewing on the inside of his lower lip. And then her gaze dropped, looking at the length of Calum’s tattooed arm since his hands were still on her cheeks and then she spoke up. Her voice was a whisper, almost lost in the night, but Calum heard it. “I don’t wanna sleep alone.”

Calum’s expression softened, understandment washing over his features as he took a quiet breath. When her blue eyes met his brown, Calum felt something in his heart clenched and he nodded without hesitation. Despite their distance in the past however long, Calum was keen on not leaving her side. Because he’d hurt her enough and wanted to make up for it, but he hated that it had to be this way.

“Come on,” he murmured, soft and reassuring as one arm went around her waist. “Up you go.”

The walk to his room was a quick one after Parker wiped at her face, the door clicking shut behind them as he hesitantly let her go to close the curtains, the room a bit dark to the lack of light save for the single lamp on his bedside. When Calum turned, he saw Parker, red eyed and nosed, looking around his room, taking in a part of him she hadn’t been privy to until this moment.

He watched her take in the two bookshelves full of books and vinyls, the record player right by it along with the guitar, the TV set up on a table opposite of the bed. She took in the furry dark rug by the bed, the cushioned chair and covers of vinyl records he had taped to the wall above the bed. There was a doorway to a closet, as well as to a showerless bathroom to make things just a little bit easier for Calum living so far from the communal bathrooms. But the other trinkets and decorations around the room, they all screamed of Calum’s personality Parker wanted to know, and he realized, over the course of the past few days, that he wanted her to.

His hand lifting, running his fingers through his hair as he took a breath and licked his lips. The sight of Parker standing in the middle of his room, taking in everything around her, had his throat tightening. “You can take the bed.”

Her head turned to look at him, a delicate furrow on her eyebrows as she asked, “What about you?”

Calum offered her a smile, reassuring and sincere as he gestured to the comfortable chair by the bed. It was cushioned and soft, whoever sat in it would just sink into the material, and he’d already fallen asleep in it more than once. “I’ll sleep on that.”

Eyes darting to the chair, Parker’s frown deepened with parted lips, taking a disagreeing breath as she shook her head. “Wh—no. I can’t ask you to do that.” She swallowed, throat working as she added, “I’ll just go to my room. I shouldn’t even be bothering you with this.”

She made a move to walk towards the door, but Calum was in her way, his heart in his throat. “No—stay.” Parker stopped at Calum’s words, mouth pressing together as she stared up at him with wondrous, disbelieving eyes. She saw the corners of his lips quirk upwards in a hopeful smile. “You shouldn’t—I don’t want you t’be alone tonight. So just—stay, yeah? Please.”

If she really didn’t want to, of course Calum wouldn’t force her to against her will. But fortunately, he saw Parker’s resolve breaking, probably because of how late it was, how tired she was over her loss. It was quite the change both of them were faced with, going from him avoiding her to her avoiding him to him offering his bed to her. But the sight of Parker crying so hopelessly had shaken Calum, so much more than he ever thought possible, making it a sight he never wanted to witness again because it was awful.

Parker pulled her lower lip into her mouth, chewing it for a moment as she looked at him. They stared at one another for a moment, taking in the sight of his tattooed arms and curly hair and sincere expression that melted some of the tightness in her heart, and she relented. “Okay.”

They adjusted, with Calum taking one pillow and blanket from the bed for himself on the chair, settling into the comfortable furniture as he watched, just a few feet away, Parker take off her slippers and slip into the bed under the blanket, already in her pajamas. The glow of the lamp lit up her face as she lay on her side, facing it, facing where Calum laid on the chair nearby. He looked at her, cheek resting against his own pillow with the blanket at his waist also resting on his side.

It was a sight, having her in his bed, not exactly expecting it to be under these circumstances. But Calum didn’t care nor did he mind. He didn’t want to be alone tonight and if this was how it had to be, he was perfectly fine with it. So long as Parker knew that he would be there for her if she needed him to be.

They were quiet for a moment, the silence of the night settling over them in his room. He wondered if his pillow and blanket would smell like her in the morning, kind of hoped for it, prayed that she’d be able to get a good night’s rest.

“She had complications after delivery.” Parker’s voice was quiet, eyes unfocused and looking at something past Calum, maybe the shelves behind him, and he stayed quiet. “Postpartum preeclampsia. It—it’s a rare condition and we should’ve known because she had diabetes. But she just—” Parker stopped, voice shuddering, throat working as she remained laying on the bed. “She stroked out. And we were just—too late.”

Calum swallowed the lump that formed in his throat, feeling the pain in Parker’s voice and just how much this was affecting her. He couldn’t imagine that kind of ache she was suffering through, couldn’t imagine the weight of the guilt she was enduring over losing a patient she’d known for so long, someone she was meant to take care of. Having someone’s life in your hands—Calum couldn’t imagine it, and he realized that he admired Parker for the career she had. She saved people’s lives for a living. No doubt the loss of one she failed to help would eat away at her tremendously, especially if it was a patient she’d been treating for years.

He so desperately wanted to help her. Except all he could say right now was a soft and sincere, “I’m sorry.”

For everything.

Parker pulled the blanket up to her chin, blue eyes flashing to Calum’s brown, letting out a breath. She looked at him and Calum felt a shiver run down his spine because the way she was looking at him made him feel as though she was looking for something. He wasn’t sure if she found what she was looking for, wasn’t sure what she was thinking, as Parker reached for the hanging handle of the lamp and murmured to Calum, “I know,” before shutting it off.

Both spent most of the night thinking of each other, thinking of everything that’s happened, but never saying a word. Never reaching out to the person laying just a few feet away from them. But they thought of each other. Dreamt of each other. Hoped things would get better. And, eventually, fell asleep.

*****

Parker stood in front of the glass door, shuffling on her feet and wondering if she should just knock on the damn door. She’d been standing outside of it for about five minutes now, silently debating this, when she knew she should just fucking knock. But Parker was nervous and a little bit scared, if she was being honest, because last night Calum had been so kind and sincere with her that she was dreading the potential rude awakening she may have to face. That it had only been a one time thing because he caught her sobbing her heart out and felt for her in that moment, and now things were going to go back to the way they had been for weeks now.

Still, Parker felt bad. She had left early this morning, before Calum even woke up because she was being paged, and left in a hurry. Truthfully, she wanted to thank him for letting her stay in his room last night, because despite the way he’d been acting towards her leading up to last night, Parker still appreciate the kindness—even if it was simple, decent human behavior. But she’d never been one to take someone’s kindness and not thank them for it. Which is why she was here now.

So she knocked, knuckles rapping on the glass pane, throat working to swallow the nervous lump that had formed as she waited for him to answer. Parker played with her fingers, picking at her unpainted nails as she looked around the roof, the late afternoon sun providing a warm glow all over. Her admirance of it was cut short, however, when the door swung open and there stood Calum.

Her breath hitched at the sight of him, only in grey sweats and an oversized darker grey shirt, looking unfairly adorable with his messy curls and providing Parker with the sudden, ridiculous urge to just fucking hug him. He looked so comfortable in his clothes, yet so attractive with the tattoos inking his brown skin and the scruff he was sporting. It was dizzying, just looking at him.

“Hi,” she found herself greeting, voice expectedly a whisper as she offered a smile.

She noticed the slight raise in Calum’s eyebrows at the sight of her, hand going from gripping the door handle to the frame higher up, offering a small smile of his own. “Hey,” he responded easily. His dark eyes took in the sight of her, showered and in leggings and a tank top after returning from her shift at the hospital. Brown met blue as he surprised her by asking, “Wanna come in?”

Parker looked over his shoulder into the familiar room, not entirely expecting that offer. She’d been waiting for the cold yet blank looks and unfriendly nature, which may be unfair given how he’d acted the night before—yet still justifiable because of how he’d behaved every day leading up to it—right? Still, Parker felt herself nod as she answered, “Yeah.”

She got a whiff of his familiar, dizzying cologne as he stepped aside to let her in, mixed in with the faintest scent of nicotine as Calum shut the door behind her. The room was just as same as the night before, of course, only this time the afternoon sun sweeped in through the curtains and their was a glow in his room in place of the darkness from before. Turning to face Calum, Parker was once again playing with her fingers as she started, “I just, uh, wanted to thank you. For, you know, listening to me last night and letting me sleep in your bed.” She licked her lips nervously, heart leaping ever so slightly as she saw his eyes track the movement before unapologetically meeting her gaze once more. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Yeah, I did,” came his immediate response, one corner of his mouth lifting up, as if allowing Parker to sleep in his bed was something he did all the time. Like it was no big deal. “You were going through somethin’ and I don’t—I didn’t want you to be alone last night.” Then Calum let out a quiet, raspy and breathy chuckle that screamed of self deprecation as he shrugged his shoulders and his left hand reached up to rub the side of his neck, silver bracelet slinking downwards. “You probably wanted to be with a friend or somethin’, but I, um, I wanted you to know that ’m here for you, too.”

Parker could feel her heart pounding in her chest and hear it in her ears, teeth pressing together briefly at Calum’s words, eyeing him for any sign of insincerity. But he looked genuine, sounded it too, along with disappointment in himself for even having to put himself in a category that wasn’t considered being friends with Parker. Yet he still managed to make her heart race, make her wonder if he wanted to be just her friend or something more. “Really?”

Calum’s hand dropped to his side, Adam’s apple in his throat working as he instantly answered, “Yes.” He released a sharp breath, sounding so loud in the comforting quiet of his room as he took two steps towards Parker as he said, “I’m sorry, doll, for everything. I’m sorry ’bout your patient—’bout Joanna. I’m sorry you’re hurtin’ and that I can’t fix it. And I’m—’m sorry for bein’ such an asshole and hurtin’ you just because I couldn’t get my own shit together and treated you so badly. I’m sorry for callin’ you an intruder when you first got here—” He almost laughed at how stupid he’d been.” Calum wasn’t sure if he’d apologized to one person so much before in his life, but he meant every word. Every fucking syllable. Hurting Parker ate away at him a lot more than he thought it would, the whole situation escalating out of his control, and it almost drove him crazy. It drove him crazy that he wanted her right away, drove him mad when he finally got to have her, and it drove him completely fucking insane that he was being such a shitty person to her when she’d done absolutely nothing wrong. Who was he to give her more crap to worry about than she already had to? Who the fuck did that? Especially to someone they liked? It was sick.

His throat felt dry, but Calum didn’t care as he now stood in front of Parker, his height towering over hers as their eyes never left each others; his genuine and honest and desperate and hers incredulous and bewildered and—dare he consider it—elated. It gave him a little bit of hope, a little bit of a push to keep going. “I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, or at all, but I really am sorry, Parker. I am. . .” He trailed off breathily, letting out a slightly incredulous laugh as he shook his head at himself. “I am so sorry that ’m absolutely terrible at tellin’ the girl I like how I feel because she deserves more than that from me. You deserve more than that.”

Parker wondered, right there, if Calum could hear the way her heart was hammering in her chest, how she could feel every nerve in her body electrify with every word he spoke. She was acutely aware of everything; of the strands of her blonde hair tickling the bare skin of her shoulders, of the complete dryness of her mouth Calum’s tenderly intense words created, of the glorious tightness in her chest that wasn’t caused by pain or hurt but by relief and disbelief and so much more her spinning head couldn’t quite properly focus on.

He liked her. He liked her and he was sorry for everything. He liked her and he completely meant it.

She could see the apology in Calum’s eyes, could hear it in the desperation of his words. They could, and would, have a much longer conversation about it all later. But right now, Parker didn’t want to hurt. He was trying to make up for it, was already succeeding at it, and she could give him grief over it later on. Right now, she just wanted him.

“You know,” she spoke up, a lilt creeping into her tone as she took a step towards him, the distance between their bodies closing up exponentially as her eyes never left his. Calum watched her, intensely and hopefully and longingly, and she felt her heart flutter. Parker was tired of all the bullshit. She just wanted to go past it. And, admittedly, she wanted Calum. Practically from the moment she’d met him. Her eyes flickered to his lips, full and pink and kissable, before continuing, “I’m getting tired of you deciding what I deserve. You can’t decide things for me and expect me to abide by them, Calum.”

His throat worked, eyes dropping to her own pink lips, adoring the freckles on her face and wanting to spend hours counting every single one. Maybe he could someday. “You’re absolutely right,” Calum responded, his voice unintentionally dropping to a raspy whisper, one that sent a pleasant shiver down Parker’s spine. His forehead dropped, pressing against hers, curls brushing against her skin. The small smile that had tugged on his lips faltered slightly, sighing softly as he admitted, “I definitely don’t deserve you, though.”

Parker couldn’t help but roll her eyes, leaning away ever so slightly as their hands absently found each other’s. “Again with the executive decision making,” she huffed out, only slightly joking, as she pursed her lips up at Calum. He rolled his own lips into his mouth, gaze dropping, and Parker shook her head, squeezing his hands as she felt the cool metal of his rings against her skin. With a kind, gentle smile, she added, “I forgive you.” His eyes met hers, disbelieving and confused, and her smile widened. “I do, because I spend way too much time in a hospital where people don’t ever say what they mean to those they care about and who regret what they didn’t get to do once it’s too late. I don’t—” Parker paused, worrying that she may be coming off too strong, relaxing only at the sight of the soft smile on Calum’s face and the reassuring squeeze he gave her hands this time. Her heart fluttered; she liked this side of him. Could definitely get used to it. “I don’t want to have any regrets, and I don’t want you to, either.” She smiled, pretty and honest. “Doctor’s orders.”

The last two words had a gentle, adoring laugh escaping Calum, one that widened Parker’s grin because it was a sound she wanted to hear more of. A sight, full of a wide grin and crinkled eyes, she never wanted to forget, as his forehead returned to press against hers. It was tender, he was tender, a complete change from how things had been between them, yet neither would have it any other way. Because even though it may only have been a few weeks, it felt like a lifetime where they spent avoiding each other, acting stupid and ignoring their feelings. And being there, holding each other’s hands and breathing the other in, strangely felt like coming home.

It was terrifying and nerve wracking and completely ridiculous to feel this way after only meeting just weeks ago. But, God, neither of them cared. Not when it felt this good and this right. Not when they’d gone through tedious avoidances and mishandled feelings.

“Doctor’s orders, huh?” Calum grinned, nose brushing against Parker’s, their foreheads still pressed together and the distance between them practically nonexistent. Their skin was heating up with the desire of wanting to be closer than they were, both eager to give in. Calum hummed approvingly. “I think I can follow those.”

Parker couldn’t help the grin on her face; wide and goofy and relieved as she stared into a pair of brown eyes that were more warm and inviting than she’d ever seen them. She tilted her mouth towards his, lips brushing together and sending jolts of electricity down both of their bodies. It was a wonder they didn’t close the gap right then and there. “You sure?”

She was teasing him. Calum could see it in the glint in her eyes and the lilt in her tone, and it only made him want to kiss her more. Made him appreciate Parker and who she was, and he couldn’t wait to get to know her more. In every single way possible. Trying to keep his distance from her when she first moved into the Viridian had been an idiot’s move on his part, which only backfired on him later on. But Calum knew, in that moment with her hands in his and her lips slowly coming to touch his, that Parker Hayden being the newest member of the Viridian had the potential of being the best thing that could’ve happened to him.

His lips brushed hers, a soft and honest murmur of, “Yes, doc,” escaping him, and the last thing he saw was Parker’s widened smile before pressing his lips to hers. They melted into each other, instantly and familiarly and finally. This time, the promise of there being more excited their hearts and slowed their kiss; soft and languid and savoring every movement of lips. This time, they allowed themselves to truly get lost in the other’s touch because they knew, deep down, they may have also found themselves in the other.

tags: @crownedbyluke @irwinkitten @glitterprincelu @softforcal @valentinelrh @hotmessmichael @meetashthere @astroashtonio @calumh-excess @hearts-to-the-sky @old-zeppelin-shirt @angelbbycal @captain-what-is-going-on @calumthoodsyonce @cathartichaoss @misskarynie @softboycal @soulmatecashton @babygirlcashton @cxddlyash @calumhoodless @wrappedaroundcal @calumculture @ohhmuke @fucking5sos @heavenlyhemminqs @cosmixcalum @invisiblexcth @gettingjillywithit @calistheloml @cliffordcntrl @asht0ns-world @hereforlukescruff @ghostofch @ghostsofhood @dxmncalum @bitchinbabylon @walkedhomealone @poppedpins @5secondssofssummer @calumsmermaid @booklove-2 @empathycth @checkeredcalum @lovelettercalum @kchillout @rosecoloredash @theagenderwhocriedwolf @cal-pal-cuddles @xhaileyreneex @calteahood @biwriting @2k17muke @sublimehood @tupeloohoneyy @egyptiangoldhood @x-valntyne-x @bloodlinecal @97britt @emma070900 @mmxiihood @monsteramongmikey @akacalciumhood @thebodaciouscth @5sos-stan4lyfe @lipstickstainfading @flannelpunkcalum @c-sainthood @inlovehoodx @all-i-want-is2b-loved-by-you @fireupthatthrone @lmao5sosimagines @isabella-mae13 @mysteriouslycali @teageowen @fallfrxmgrace @dontjinx-it @thewackywriter @caswinchester2000 @calntynes @post-traumatic-mess @kissmefree

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inhalareexhalare · 6 years ago

Text

Inserted Re-Post// Ways You Can Fuck Up Someone Else’s Life and Your Own

Reuel is the name of the post-er:

(Beware Spoilers to a Filipino Film)

Alone Together (2018) - more like, sociopath-daddy issues together

Back when i was 16, i had 2 goals in life. 2 goals in life i want to achieve and that's it, my job is done, and i will be complete.

1. Eat a 21 piece KFC bucket by myself. 2. Play metal guitar as fast as possible.

It did not take long before i realized how shallow and stupid those goals were. I mean, it would be cool to be my age now and still have the arteries to handle 21 pieces of genetically modified fried chicken, or play open chords on a jcm marshall 800 ... but to call those GOALS, was a reflection of my youth and naivete.

As my goals in life changed, so did my perception and taste for rom coms and love stories.

I am no longer in my 20's, i am married, and i am in the stage where i have a very clear view of relationships without my libido to distract me.

Alone Together is a celebration of traits that breaks up future marriages and fucks up one's family life. If your goal in life is to be a single mother, or a deadbeat father, then you will love the characters played by Enrique Gil and Liza Soberino (i am murdering their last names, i really do not follow Philippine showbiz).

To give you better context, it is time for spoilers, and i will walk you through why both characters are messed up (and should refrain from raising children), and why their lives are the way it is.

Once upon a time, there were 2 lovers. Gil is a struggling med student, and Liza is a magna cum laude art student.

At that age, Gil, just like 16 year old me, has 2 goals in life:

1. Make Liza proud of him. 2. Marry Liza.

His goals are dumber, because at least my stupid goals only harmed my arteries and my finances.

When your self esteem is based on the approval of another person, you are going to be fucked. People are messed up. People are unpredictable. People change. And most of all, you cannot control people. The only thing you can control in this world is you.

If you want a stable self-esteem. It has to be based on how you see yourself.

Number 2. Marriage. You do not make "marrying your college girlfriend" your goal because life is bigger than shacking up with your girlfriend. The world is big. Possibilities are endless. And, you are young. Marriage requires a very deep understanding of the world and especially yourself. That is not possible in your 20's, even if you think you are more mature than others out there.

Here's a reality check: you are not mature. You are not a special snowflake. Everyone your age falls into the same thinking pattern you do. Heck, i did, and everybody thought i was mature. Remember, im that guy whose goal was 21 pieces of KFC chicken and playing Slayer at 250bpm.

Anyway ... in this movie, Gil never got to read my facebook page (plus he has no dad to teach him), so he ended up a crying mess when Liza broke up with him (for no clear reason), and he doomed himself into a purgatory of some sort.

Purgatory. Its that stage in your life where you refuse to grow and stay exactly the same person you are, making the same mistakes and believing in the same dumb-assed shit that got you there in the first place.

Now, on Liza's end ... she has already graduated Magna Cum Laude in Fine Arts and she is involved in a workplace controversy where her boss misappropriated 1 million pesos out of the company. She is an accesory to the crime, since she stupidly allowed everything to happen in front of her without telling anyone. She got involved in a law suit, and her career working in the economically viable world of Fine Arts is now ruined.

This brought about great depression in her, that she broke up with Gil.

Gil, being the sociopath he is, has zero empathy, and thought Liza broke up with him because he sucks at med school and he is taking a long while to graduate.

Fast forward 5 years later.

Liza is now in a relationship with a very industrious man, who is also going through an annulment. This man is her boss, and is probably a CEO of the company she works for. This guy is rich as fuck. And you know, in Pinoy movies, the rich fucker is always an asshole.

But i digress. I like the rich fucker, and i'll expound on it later.

Liza has a close relationship with Rich Guy's daughter, and she spends more time with her than the guy does.

Why?

The rich guy is busy running an architecture company, who even has clients based in New York ... plus the movie wants to frame: rich people = no time for family = asshole.

Liza complains that Rich Guy confuses her because eventhough he was the one who saved her career, helped her in the lawsuit, she is confused that Rich Guy treats her like an employee, while occasionally treating her like a girlfriend.

To this i say: of course Liza!

He is CEO of a really big company that he probably started. Do you know how hard it is to start a company? Do you know how hard he worked to build a company that big and that succesful?

He did that by putting the right people in the right corporate positions. And he did that to you because he thought you have talent for whatever job it is you are doing.

You have a job and financial security because of him, and now you are complaining that he treats you like an employee, while just 3 minutes ago, you were picked up in a chauffered car that you took to meet up with your fucking ex-boyfriend?!

I am getting ahead of myself. Let us go back to the story.

So Liza and Rich Guy goes to this awards event where Rich Guy is getting an outstanding person award. Lo and behold, another person was also getting a doctor of the year award (for helping poor people, of course, you have to always help poor people in Pinoy movies, because that is the only way you'll be a hero in the story), that person is, Gil.

Now, if i see any of my ex's ... i would smile and wave at them and go my merry way like every sane ex would.

But Liza and Gil? ... fuck no.

Not only did they meet each other's significant other, they also managed to exchange numbers, while making plans to meet up later.

Upon meeting, Gil the sociopath mindfucked Liza about their 5 year old past. He is now a great doctor - that for some reason, only has scenes in the ER, helping POOR people for free. And he even brings Liza to his workplace, mindfucking her again into seeing how much he helps POOR people.

Now, this pinoy schtick annoys me so much because poor people are ALWAYS ALWAYS: nice, polite, thankful, humble, appreciative.

Well guess what? I have a clinic with my wife and do you know who always gives me a headache?

People with no fucking money. Poor people.

I am sorry. If you own a business, sold guitars, worked the cashier in a hospital, worked as a waiter ... most of your problems and pains will be from poor people or poor people pretending to be rich.

People with money, pay you, smile and go about their merry way.

Poor people? Fuck. They would always have a version of buyer's remorse, or they would go out of their way to get you in trouble so they can have their version of a discount.

So yes. Stop framing poor people as saints and rich people as devils. Both exist regardless of financial status. And you will not be smiling and handsome as Gil if your job is serving people who cannot pay medical bills.

All this mindfucking ultimately convinced Liza to represent Rich Guy's corporation in New York.

At this point, Liza is already a cheating bitch in denial. She is meeting Gil regularly. They even go on dates where they pretend to be bf-gf.

I mean, i could respect Liza if she was just a horny bitch, but she is so deep in denial of her cheating ... that horny bitch or cheating bitch, i have lost respect for her character.

She is the girl i will tell my son to never take seriously. Have fun with her, hang out with her, but under no circumstance should he be serious with a cheating horny bitch.

You do not want to be involved with a woman who is so lost and damaged, she has zero clue what she wants in this life.

That is a big clue in whether a woman is worth marrying. She should know who she is and what she is capable of. Anyone who is in denial or ignorant about their flaws is a bigger headache than people who cannot pay their medical bills.

Anyway, Liza goes to New York. She extends her stay so she can go see some museums. And guess who is there?

The sociopath Gil of course.

Without any permission, Gil, the angel doctor who helps poor people, leaves the hospital and his girlfriend on a whim, to see his ex in New York.

At this point, i was really pissed off because the movie is now celebrating these 2 cheating son of a bitches.

They go on dates, they kissed. And Gil told Liza he broke up with his gf, so they can be together again.

Now you understand why i call Gil a sociopath.

Gil is completely devoid of empathy. Here are the signs:

1. He has no boundaries. When Liza broke up with him, he stalked her house for weeks. Any psychologically healthy male knows that no means no.

2. He has a girlfriend, yet he texted and asked to meet Liza.

3. Upon meeting Liza, he had no guilt flirting with her, holding her hand, and within 10 seconds, introduced her to his current girlfriend. Any normal male would show guilt at this point.

4. He leaves his job like it was nothing.

5. He broke up with his current gf as if it were nothing.

6. He is hot and cold with Liza. Hot, when Liza wants to stop their affair. Cold, when Liza suddenly wants to see him.

You know whats the saddest part?

I have met and dated girls who wanted those things in a man!

1. They want the guy to fight for their love and not give up. Who does that? A sociopath!

2. Will never get over them even after years of not meeting. Errr, obsessed sociopath?

3. Would drop everything for them. Errr, impulsive sociopath?

4. Will choose them even when they have a gf. Cheating, horny sociopath?

5. Challenging, unpredictable and full of surprises. Oh i know people like that! They are sociopaths!

Movies like this celebrate sociopaths, just because they have a job that helps the poor.

Now, after the New York momol, Liza decides not to see Gil.

Liza is such a fucked up character. She is cheating, yet she does not want to do it, yet, she misses it and wants to do it again.

Gil, shows his sociopath rage and tells Liza that she only stuck with the guy for 5 years because she has nowhere to go. He claims that she is only guilty and is only repaying Rich Guy by being his girlfriend.

To this i think its presumptuous of Gil.

Rich Guy made her human again - saved her from a law suit, gave her a real career. how can she not fall in love with a guy like that?

But since Liza is a girl with daddy issues, has zero clue what traits to look for a guy, as long as he is handsome and helps the poor like Gil ... she believes him.

Liza and Rich Guy had dinner to which Liza kept yapping about her musuem trip, while Rich Guy was totally not interested and kept asking her questions about the client meetings.

You know, Rich Guy did send her to New York to represent their company. And just allowed her to stay for 3 more days of sight seeing. He spent company money, 100k or so for a back and forth trip to Philippines and New York ... so it is normal that he cares about the business meetings more than the boring art stuff Liza is yapping out.

Rich Guy did not become rich because his interest in life was appreciating art. His interest is in business, so you really cannot fault him for wanting to ask about the meetings before anything else.

Liza, apparently, does not give a shit about finances, despite being stuck in a million peso law suit and unemployment, because she does not like Rich Guys concerns at all. So she proposes that shes not happy with her corporate job and is interested in taking low paying, entry level museum jobs.

Again, pinoy movies really hammer it down that finances are nothing and our passion and family is what matters. It is not surprising why most Filipinos are in terrible financial situations ... for some reason, its media celebrates not giving a shit about money, despite the fact that it is the problem staring us straight in the face all the time.

Rich Guy was pissed, but calmed down and told her that if she wants to mess around and have fun with her art shit, he knows some people and he can get her jobs on the spot with his connections.

Apparently, Liza does not like this. She broke up with Rich Guy then and there.

So, i dont get it.

Rich Guy allowed her to quit her corporate job, even got her a job for the art stuff she wanted to do, and she gets mad.

Do you know what kind of a girl would punish a man for taking care of her, while rewarding another man who mindfucks her?

A girl who is going to be a single mother.

I know this is probably going to be very offensive, because there are single mothers in here. But to this, im going to ask:

-have you ever dreamed of being a single mother?

The answer is no. Along with that No, is probably an admission of the mistake in being involved with a man you should have never been involved with.

I am sorry if you are a single mother. It is not the best status to be in, but if you truly learned from your experience, you will agree with what i say:

You had no clue what traits to look for in a man.

Liza is an example of someone who has no idea in what traits to look for in a man, and this movie teaches the wrong mindset, especially when looking for someone to have children with.

Liza let go a man who could have secured her future, and she chose a fucking sociopath over him.

Now, after the break up, Liza rushed to the hospital to tell Gil that she is now free and single! At this point, Liza is also now a sociopath. A girl with daddy issues craves for approval of a male she idolizes, she ends up taking on their traits.

Gil, was stone cold upon seeing her. Normally, he would be happy cause now they can be together, right? Wrong!

Gil does not want Liza anymore because his ex, the one he left for Liza, is pregnant.

Yes... ironic as it is, Liza did not become a single mom, but the other girl who got involved with Gil became a single mom.

You may hate what i say, but even the goddamned movie confirmed my predictions.

Now, Liza is officially alone ... and shes having a hard time looking for a job. Shes back to being poor, and nobody would hire her cause of her lawsuit past. But since this is a movie, Liza still gets to wear expensive clothes and makeup while struggling to find work until, one art museum took her in and she became very succesful.

She claims in the epilogue she doesnt get to meet Gil again, but as soon as she said that, Gil showed up in her museum, telling her that he broke up with his pregnant girlfriend but they promised to be good parents to their kid.

The last scene shows us Gil and Liza looking at a painting of Spolarium, while Gil carries and introduces his son to Liza. I mean, that is an awesome way to market a broken family. Make it look normal and problem free where daddy has a new girlfriend, totally ignoring the dynamics of original mommy in the equation.

Can you imagine how that set up is gonna mess up a child?

I have a mom. I have a dad who lives in a different house. I do not see dad much. Dad has a girl who is nice to me, but is not my mommy. Dad kisses that girl, but never kisses mommy. Meanwhile, theres another man in mommy's house who kisses mommy but is not my daddy.

I am sorry if you are in that situation. I do not mean to offend, but you do not want your children to be in that situation. Do not be offended just because i wrote about your mistake and the consequences you are living with now.

3/10.

Theres a reason why Philippine cinema is dying, and that is because it promotes values that is detrimental to our progress as mature beings.

It is funny that watching a movie and reading a comic book about an intergalactic threat like Thanos, teaches us more values about friendship, heroism and sacrifice, than a relationship movie that completely ignores the consequences of stupid decisions, while making cartoonish stereotypes of people in specific financial situations.

This is why it’s important to be clear about your goals, folks.

(1) Goal/s. This is your purpose. Your driving force. Your motivation to get up in the morning. Your reason for living. Consciously make concrete your goal/s in life. Evaluate. There’s nothing wrong with revision and reconfiguration. What’s wrong is, as the writer put it, “purgatory.” Stagnation.

(2) Intention/s. This is actually synonymous to Goal/s, but I put it here in search of a different perspective. Your ultimate goal doesn’t change much. Not a lot. But your intentions do. We have limited attention. We humans are easily distracted, and easily scared. In fear, we cling to something illusory. In intoxication, we hold on to temporary glory. This, is why I differentiate goals with intentions.

Your goals don’t change in your logical mind, but your intentions do, in your wandering head/heart. It’s important to be aware of what you do and why you do it. Again, there’s nothing wrong with reconfiguration. Mistakes isn’t the end. Collect principles from them.

(3) Choice/s. Once you know you’re in the right/wrong track, it doesn’t end there. Getting better takes initiative. You have to be active about what you want. If you have time to complain, you have time to do something productive and improve yourself as a person. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to set small goals on your way up your personal stairs. It’s impossible to be a musician in one day simply because it’s too big a step. That’s just impossible for you.

Small goals are big decisions. They decide your new habits. Small goals are like, requiring yourself to practice at least five minutes a day. It’s the small routines that build up your muscle. As your muscle overgrows your routine, that signals you to set higher small goals. Things are achieved through consistency. The first two points are there so that you can detect your bad habits as early as you can to replace them with new habits. Habits maketh human.

The movie shows how far they went, not realizing the inner mechanism of their minds. They fail to challenge themselves. They fail to ask themselves important questions, and they have no desire to assess their wants and needs, and the consequences their decisions make.

Being human is not an easy thing, you should know.

You have a mind. Put it to good use.

I’m not afraid of failure. What I fear is the point of no longer wanting to learn, no longer desiring to progress.

THE WORLD DESERVES MORE FROM ME, AND IT IS TOO RICH AND TOO VAST FOR ME TO TAKE FOR GRANTED

#chrono7 #repost #alone together #toxic #self-worth #goals #purpose #marriage #love #family #social

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