#The Paradise of Thorns: love died

[lilitblaukatz]

Gay true happy endings are much more rare in the contemporary media than whatever you are planning, Jeff, fucking heartbreak junkie.

So, I'm just saying.

[mayullla]

Title: Little Sunshine!

Characters: Douma (/Doma) (Demon Slayer)

Summary: You were taken into the Paradise Faith cult with Kotoha (Inosuke's mother.) And like her, Douma became rather fond of you. When Kotoha ran away, she had no choice but to leave you behind as Douma hid the truth away from you and turned you into one of his own kind.

Warnings/tags: Platonic yandere, fem!child!reader, the reader gets turned into a demon (drinking blood is mentioned here / forced), manipulation

Note: Part 2 is here!

You were holding the hand of Kotoha Hashibira, a pregnant woman who brought you along with her when she was welcomed into the Paradise Faith cult.

You were around 3 to 4 years old that time, if Douma remembers correctly when you walked in curiously looking at everything around you so naively and sweetly asking Kotoha who these people welcoming you and her were.

If he was right, Douma remembers that you didn't belong to Kotoha. That two of you weren't blood-related, but she picked you up somewhere as she found you abandoned and alone. It was a common occurrence, no doubt, that kids get abandoned by their own parents. Maybe it was due to poverty or maybe for other reasons but Kotoha told Douma that was hard to ignore you as you look at the world with something in your eyes. Something that she could not pinpoint.

Yet Douma definitely found something common between you and Kotoha, these cheerful and innocent personalities that the two of you have. The two of you would always play together, as you followed along when Kotoha sang or times when you played alone but always invited him to join you when you noticed him.

Even now after years you still do the same, as you toss the ball high up into the air and then catch it the servants watching from far away clapping their hands and they look fondly at you the daughter of Douma having but age only one year after so long.

"Dear," Douma stated, gesturing that you come to him. Looking up from your ball, you trotted over to him, tilting your head curiously. Sometimes you remind him of how he fondly looked at you and Kotoha, the days when he would watch you play around and laugh in delight trying to ask him to carry you as you looked at the koi fish inside the pond. Your eyes were innocent even years later, but then again, you sleep more than before, so maybe mentally, you wouldn't age as much...

"Ah, my lovely child, you are awake! Why didn't you tell me so? I would have come sooner." Douma stated, patting your head. While it has been made this idea that you and Douma were father and daughter, it couldn't have been far from the truth.

It was a public ritual that had been made between you and Douma. The followers envied you, a small child who was forced to drink the blood that came from Douma's hand sliced with a knife and poured into a small cup. It seemed that you didn't remember such a situation occurring as he once brought it up only to get a confused look from you.

You cried so much that day when you were forced to drink from the cup, as the followers all held you down, telling you that you should be grateful and happy that you have been given this honor. That you and Douma would now be related, and there was nothing more privilege than to be related to the man who they worshipped.

With a smile, Douma continued to watch. Your body wanted to curl as you felt the pain in your body as if thorns were stabbed everywhere. Maybe this wouldn't have happened... maybe you would have stayed a human for a long time till you died as one if Kotoha hadn't found out about his little secret.

He remembered when Kotoha tried to run away, she wanted to get you too, but with Inosuke in her arms and him on the way she wasn't able to do so.

Your cries of pain were what he listened to as he thought about the past.

"Where is Kotoha-san and Inosuke?" You asked one night after searching the whole day for them.

"They have left, dear child." Douma smiled down at you, his face covered by the shadow made by the moonlight. His eyes glowed brightly as he watched your reaction to the news. "Oh... are they coming back?" You asked, looking down at the floor fidgeting in your spot. "I am not sure, dear..." Douma replied, watching.

How confused you were, then a sort of realization, then betrayed, sorrow, acceptance, and lastly, loneliness. He enjoyed watching your emotions very much, how expressive your eyes were, a smile still on his face. He wondered what you would do next. Would you curl up in a corner and hide away mopping that you have been abandoned once again, or would you just cry here screaming why?

"Will you stay with me?" Your question almost barely a whisper surprised Douma, as his eyes widen, and somewhere in his body jumped at your words.

It was unfamiliar to him. He wasn't able to reply as silence draped through the room. You stared at him with a cautious hope that started to dim little by little every second he didn't answer.

"Yes.." That word surprised Douma a lot, such a common word held an unfamiliar, heavy feeling that he never thought he would experience. Covering his mouth with his fingers as he wondered if he really was the one who said it. Looking at you, he saw your eyes just light up just a little, and as you smiled.

It was at that moment he thought that his heartbeat, or whatever similar thing there was for a demon. But other than that, there was something else he noticed in his heart, one he could not recognize at all. Yet he thought it was such an erratic, crazed feeling. It was almost addictive.

Douma thought that maybe through you, he might... might just be able to experience these emotions that he never thought he could. The feeling of just being a little more... real.

It was his own amusement that led to the decision to turn you into a demon just like him. When he had done just a good amount of work for Muzan when he asked for a little prize for his work. Mozan stared at him with disdain when he had asked, wondering if he had gone crazy. But to get him out of his sight, Muzan let him do as he pleases, allowing you to become a demon.

Douma watched as you cried your eyes out in pain. Your eyes ever so slowly became more and more crazed. The want for blood you crave would be soon as you tried to find someone to eat, yet Douma noticed how you also looked as if another side of you was fighting. Not wanting to spill blood, as tears fell from your eyes begging yourself to stop.

Instead of eating a human, before Douma could even call for one and offer that dish to you. You passed out.

How... boring... he thought as he stared at you, poking your cheek.

You slept for a long time. A few months or more, he didn't count. Douma sent you to another room to be cared for by the worshippers and almost have completely forgotten about you tired of waiting after a while.

When Douma had asked Muzan about turning a child into a demon, almost all the upper-rank demons were there then. Akaza wondered what has gotten into Douma to ask such a thing but it wasn't like he once understood the guy. So did the other demons they all looked at Douma as if he went insane.

Douma didn't care. He didn't really care what they thought of him, but imagine his surprise when he after a year saw you with Akaza. You were laughing cheerfully as the man carried you on his shoulders. His face was a little confused, but letting you do as you please as you raved about how high up you were. He watched as the smile on Akaza's lips became a little more genuine as he continued to play with you.

... it was a dirty feeling, ugly and disgusting that he wanted to vomit out. It felt like he was drowning in thick mud as he watched you play with Akaza. Just a year ago, he was the one to do this for you.

And he doesn't know why...

Note: I think it was really obvious to those who follow me that I would pick writing demons rather than the demon slayers... hehe

[secriden]

so, i'm fascinated by the choice to have Thongkam and Sek have a durian farm in The Paradise of Thorns. this is purely speculative and based of some BTS pictures and the trailer but I think it's intentional that they've chosen to make it set in a durian farm.

durian is a fruit that's very popular in many South East Asian countries and i grew up eating it. 'durian season' is a Big Deal because so many people love it and its very expensive when its out of season, and my family used to have special get togethers with all the cousins to eat durian together. i've seen my cousins 'fight' with other customers for the best pieces before in the market. we call it the 'king of the fruits' and it's known for its strong smell, its hard/thorny exterior and how rich and delicious the fruit is. the smell is also known to linger for ages; it stays on your breath, your clothes, your fingers, the air. if someone has had durian in the house, you'll know for hours afterwards. some people hate the smell (they say it smells like rotting food), others love it (it smells good to me). a durian farm can also be a very dangerous place because the trees grow very tall and fruits drop on their own when they get ripe sometimes and people have died without proper protective gear.

so i think it's an intriguing allegory for the relationship between Thongkam and Sek and the story being told - how they're together and everyone knows they're together (the scent: lingering, obvious, clinging to them both) and the relationship is both wonderful (delicious, nutritious - fulfilling because of their love for each other) and dangerous (because some people hate it, even when they aren't eating it - they find the smell offensive. just like people find gay relationships offensive even when its got nothing to do with them). Sek's family doesn't honour the relationship, uses the fact that they aren't legally married to take what should be Thongkam's, literally fighting over the durian farm, just like people do in the markets. perhaps even the thorny shell of the durian is reference to Thongkam's or Sek's mother and how they both are hurting and could be the source of each other's comfort but instead choose to hurt each other to protect their soft insides.

also one of the only ways to get rid of the durian smell from your hands is to wash your hands with water that has run across/over the inner skin of the shell of the durian fruit (don't ask me why it works, but it does; my family has been doing it for years). And idk if it'll be part of the scene when Thongkam and Sek "marry" each other (if there is one) as a reference to the water blessing ceremony but if it is I'm going to SOB MY FUCKING HEART OUT. T_T

it'll be interesting to see if any of this winds up being in the movie but honestly it's really cool that something so culturally significant and specific to the region is being featured in the movie.

[conscbgb]

"The Paradise Of Thorns” starring Jeff Satur and Engfa Waraha, is set to premiere this year.

‘Thongkam’ and ‘Sek’, a devoted gay couple, have worked tirelessly to build a life together, including owning a house and a durian orchard in Mae Hong Son. Tragedy strikes when Sek dies suddenly in an accident, revealing that they were never legally married in Thailand, leaving Thongkam with no rights to their assets. The house and orchard now belong to Sek’s mother, who moves in with her adopted daughter ‘Mo’ and gardener ‘Jingna’. Thongkam must now fight to reclaim the fruits of his love and labor.

The film is written and directed by Boss Kuno, best known for his works with GDH 559 and Nadao Bangkok such as ‘I Told Sunset About You’ and more.

Finally a different and interesting plot...we are gonna cry a lot with this one...

[butteronabun]

i just love how charmingly sassy and determined the firey lady Ragnvindr is.

also i can see her having a geo or dendro vision , but the story i have in mind plays out the same way ; the future lady Ragnvindr , being utterly fed up with the lack of information on this troublesome 'dark knight hero' decides to take matters into her own hands by catching this rogue in the act.

every time that blasted fool in the black cloak is mentioned in the papers , diluc comes home to her injured ..

so one way or another , she's giving that damned vigilante hell to pay for getting her dear Diluc hurt!

thus a trap was set for the so-called hero , and how later that night diluc the dark knight hero found himself on his knees and chained to a stone stele / bound up snug by an irate pair of overgrown fanged flowers and dangling a few feet off the ground .

when first trying to free himself , diluc the dark knight hero was quietly impressed by the effort that was put into capture him.

after his restraints didn't give , he tried to reach for his weapon when his captor spoke up from behind him.

"as pretty as you are trapped like this , im still rather tempted to just throw you to the Knights and let you be their headache for a change" an annoyed voice growled from the darkness ,with the light from the lantern belonging to the voice somewhat blinding diluc the hero as his captor walks up to him and plucks his weapon out of his reach.

the future lady Ragnvindr was quietly examining her quarry's weapon when the sound of that damned hero trying to free himself started up again.

(geo version)

"why , you little-!" and with an annoyed growl , she tightened up the chains on the stone stele and just to make sure that fool didn't get cocky again ; locks were applied to all of his shackles and to add insult to injury , a collar was locked on his neck and it was structured so he couldn't turn his head..

(dendro version)

"why you little-!" and with an annoyed growl , a 3rd fanged flower joined its brethren in re-adjusting the restraints of the thorn in their mistress' side .

the 3 fanged flowers take great joy in further tangling the great hero up in the vines , only pausing to laugh and clap their leaves when their prey makes an unexpected noise.

once the 3 fanged flowers' collective giggling died down , they present their work to their mistress. and before they could fall into another round of raucous laughter ,with a snap of her fingers the flowers are replaced with 2 sturdy constructs holding - wait is he blushing?

~~~~~~~~

"e v e r y damn time , you're in the news , diluc ends up injured somehow .. so keep you hands off of him , or things will get unpleasant for you" , the last line was punctuated with her grabbing the collar of her boyfriend's that pain in her butt's shirt.

------------------------------

(≧﹏ ≦) can't believe i lost steam at the end , or it got this long , and lewd OTL

but yeah , i bet that before he revealed his true identity to her , lady Ragnvindr wasn't very fond of the dark knight hero.

and well , wouldn't you get protective of diluc when there's a shady vigilante up to something running 'bout mondstat at night?

OMGSJHDJS OMGSHAHDB - i’m sorry it took a while to answer this, but thank you for sending this to me, tumblr user rebecca-lotto! sorry it took me a while, i had been busy with finals + personal life. plus, i’m currently sick as i reply to this so i hope all this makes sense!

more darknight hero & lady of the house shenanigans under the cut:

this scenario is amazing, i’m eating it bit by bit, i also love how sassy and determined the lady ragnvindr is too, because UH-HUH‼️‼️ S Q U A R E U P, being diluc ragnvindr’s wife may seem like paradise, but it will also has its cons—not because of diluc but because of society’s expectations and what-not— so she’ll have to really toughen up! and that’s why she’s just so admirable. <3 ( ngl i would love to write more of lady ragnvindr with her maids before she got married to diluc so we can get a glimpse of her struggles, but that will be for another time! )

anyway, GOOOOSH. honestly i thought that pyro vision suits the lady ragnvindr better due to her fiery personality or fighting / courageous spirit, but hey, i’m open-minded, and i’ll say - you won me over with the lady using a dendro vision! 😍

i find it the idea of the lady ragnvindr being a victim to the “correlation is not causation” thing funny and perhaps, accurate and canon because her not putting two and two together is just so adorable AGKDJDK ( but also, don't get me wrong, i'm pretty sure our lady is intelligent, she just has her #CloudyMoments at times, and that's ok - she's still human! ) in this event, i’m assuming that this happened before marriage? when diluc still had yet to open up about his night duties?

also pleaaaaase. the fact that diluc can seriously and easily get rid of or escape the vines but chose not to because of his future spouse getting angry at him. . . and even blushing, at that. he’s incredibly more allured or captivated than ever by her. 🫣 ( or maybe she's just really strong and diluc's weak for her. . . so many possibilities hshdjf )

imagine too if the lady removes the mask while rambling on and on how she’ll not let him go for inflicting harm to her lover until she stops when she sees the lovely red eyes she’d grown to adore. “oh.”

diluc just blushes harder. “can you let me down, darling?”

the lady just stares at him. then, she narrows his eyes at him. “i’m still not letting you go. i ought to teach you a lesson.” which translates to = let me take care of your wounds first and we’ll be TALKING LOTS!

Also, it really is impressive that you’re the one who manages to catch him, unlike the Knights who have been trying for years. Well, it makes sense since you’re the only one he’ll allow himself to let his guard down . . . 🥹

[min-9things]

With the new pictures of paradise of thorns coming out I'm getting confused who thongkam's love interest will be (or would he even have a love interest his husband/boyfriend/fiance) just died.

[eresia-catara]

Do you have a favorite canto? This can apply to any part of The Divine Comedy

Keeping in mind that I still need to finish Paradiso, and that the parts that I have read need to be refreshed a bit, I have two canti that have always struck me and they're Inferno XIII and Purgatorio II.

The first one because I love that the text resembles the ambience: the phrasing is all twisted like the trees and the words are as if sharp and pointed like the thorns of the surrounding vegetation. Then we also have the soul of Pier della Vigna whose monologue is simply hhhhhhhhgnksh eatable. completely. Like his speech is so pretty so elaborate but also so violent and passionate, his first words are Perché mi schiante? Perché mi scerpi? while he is bleeding like that is such a killer way to start and MY. GOD. HE'S THE ONE WHO HELD AMBO LE CHIAVI DEL COR DI FEDERIGO E CHE LE VOLSI SERRANDO E DISSERANDO SÌ SOAVI CHE DAL SECRETO SUO QUASI OGN'UOM TOLSI LIKE SAINT PETER WITH THE KEYS OF PARADISE BUT BECAUSE OF HIS VERY LOYALTY HE KILLED HIMSELF AND DAMNED HIS SOUL TO LIVE IN DEATH SHSKSJ this canto was not responsible for my first unprompted essay that I gave to my literature professor and that was very appreciated making me realize I love working with texts for no reason. I am so normal about this canto.

Then Purgatorio II is also a very normal canto because Dante has finally reached a dimention in which he is not constantly frightened and anguished. He's in purgatory that looks like Earth except everything is soaked in hope. The souls are not clean yet, they still need to suffer, but they are all content and hopeful because they know what awaits them. And here. he meets. CASELLA. His musician and friend!! And my god OHI OMBRE VANE FUOR CHE NELL'ASPETTO!! Dante tries to wrap his arms around him three times but three times they end up on his own chest because he cannot!! touch him!!! AND CASELLA SAYS COSÌ COM'IO T'AMAI NEL MORTAL CORPO COSÌ T'AMO SCIOLTA. LIKE. DO YOU HEAR HOW LIGHT THAT SENTENCE IS?? HOW SOFT IT IS AND HOW IT ALMOST FEELS LIKE YOU ARE SIGHING?? And not only that but Casella still loves him and still wants to please him so he starts strumming and singing one of Dante's poems and Dante is reminded of the way he would always alleviate his torments when he was alive exactly by playing music!!! I MEANJSHFJSKS DANTE 😭😭😭 and then Cato comes in ushering everyone up saying they Cannot be idle and lazy they need to Hurry!! because Time is the central element in Purgatorio, just like Earth, and these are souls that are still unclean they need to earn paradise they need to Hurry!! be Quick!!

BUT there are some honourable mentions that are very dear to me and those are:

Inferno X, with the dialogue between Cavalcante and Dante which makes me spiral in a way all of its own

Purgatorio IX, the first two triplets are so lyrical and beautiful I could cry just by reading them like he describes that feeling of nostalgia so well jskjddhsk

Purgatorio XXVI, "così per entro loro schiera bruna/ s’ammusa l’una con l’altra formica,/ forse a spïar lor via e lor fortuna." has made it impossible for me to be normal about ants ever again. Also Arnaut Daniel speaking in langue d'oc??? hell yeah.

Purgatorio XXX, MATELDA!!!!

I feel bad not mentioning Paradiso but I really need to (re)read it, however I do remember that I looooved the language :')

[libidomechanica]

Wont to see: and, having pickd up several

Tribute paid: nor this world’s delight?     Who leaves to be hove down to a hundred dishes; lamb and     pistachio nuts—in short, all meats, and limb to limb spoiling     through a clown, and the shock of cold water turbidly     flower in light, throbbed

to her song, were still more nearly     treasure. Give me once there? Without a weedye crop of ink, falling     on her children up if nursing the good company     invited. The golden pomp is come, that title doth springe     giues place to elder time,

and take care of Poets fury     tell, and shortly rain’d upon the race? Wont to see: and, having     pick’d up several animals he saw—a taste and     pomegranate nodding o’er dropp’d in the wakened soul     from yours. I couldn’t even

but incessant care to tend the     whole world. Are lying in the sun, show me your slim, express’d,     he ask’d the silence and I felt before, all made us     rich, can make her; and thinner tray, tapping the connection     such people to be helps

to all others’ intellectual     breeze, at once met with him, now him, on thy heart, my mouth     be heir office might start eternal—just that the Saints above,     in solemn troops into hands when the red life so     rarefied a bliss. But Venus

sittes and a Troop of his     absence such expense; the new vastness of the sea, the dark,     and wooed Sleepe again—oppress’d with melancholy, and then     his nature’s deep breathe? He must fade as well as the pillow’d     upon the river? Yet

it should close, ne’er weary, to the     vestry of the sphere; Prithee why so pale? The sun will and play     till he flung the rat; I know too were busy beyond which     I should in the parent’s brooding wings, but never dies! We     are puppets, Man in hopeless

flame kindled at his rest. And     drove afield, and still, at least, and pleasing thorn, without him,     her host, that we are free an LP of poetry left     on in the sky, with wild thyme and nearer than half of     paradise, no tear-floods, nor

well. The sun and there, his rapier     brandished high through the bonie Betty, as father’s breast. And     with nectar—starlings sake, give you apt to kill me, what is     that Lovers, too, out of the deeps—of ocean? Divine a     thing among many. So

closed down with what Haidee’s sake, knowing     wiser, he may take her now; tis but a child, too, bleeding,     this young, looking ill prevail? Hope, in pity mock not     Woe with thee thrill the day? To think for two. By this, alas,     is more worthless damage

than married lady—the gentlemen.     Thy fair in the tale had touch’d with which thou wondrous Mother-     Age!—When did these loves; never writ, nor no man ever     wife was liberty; and now than to be lou’d, and all love     repose, till grief lies onward

stray’d, my heart will gie to Polly     Stewart! Trembling Pricket, or hunt the highway, and knew     the way to love. The long- neck’d geese of thine and hell at one     day I met wi’ a crazy auld man! The white man not a     chef come down to a very

part to live your tongue’s a feckless     matter what could fail! Dead, long dead, stiller worlds, beyond     the murm’ring stream; the sequel of the dead, ten will laugh as     he sate by the bones are moved in the evening, and his lakes.     Who wanted to say, by

delay, a death, opprest, leaue what     seas between us an uncorrupt my saint to point: slowly     to the Abbey, and ask’d why? Now sang He like yon youthful     joys, tho’ shelter’d in the good matter what peace, and redder     that does his faire outside,

which wakes my sommers pryde: also     my age now the same to be a devil, wooing his     style than a windy morn; an’ she has twa sparkling roguish     een. Where is no plant that thought warbling his own vision     of all humanity,—

lie on their Strength and bore its fragrant     but the lass o’ Ballochmyle. And there was not a     bell was rung, not as I wont to frame my desires, and     the names of tissue, meridian-like, were two spirit     all the valley. A heart

to herd with incessant. Men, my     brothers, are a kind that they deaf that sweetheart to her even     strained in the pith, like a shroud! Mind to scorn whom frown’st thou     thy fury on some few years long enough infinite mercy     he had been a Sultan

and the wild seas, on thy pillow     them: but chiefly where Deva spread; gazelles and some skill     in giving known that earth has Nero, more strong to shear away,     dead ere his sort ever scuttled ship or cut a     Of laughter’s heart is rest.

[hieromonkcharbel]

The Priest Saying the Divine Office

I love to pray in God’s temple, especially within the holy altar, before the Holy Table or the Prothesis, for by God’s grace I become wonderfully changed in the temple. During the prayer of repentance and devotion, the thorns, the bonds of the passions, fall from my soul and I feel so light; all the spell, all the enticement of the passions vanish, and I seem to die to the world, and the world, with all its joys, dies for me. I live in God and for God, for God alone. I am wholly penetrated by Him, and am one spirit with Him. I become like a child soothed on its mother’s knee. Then my heart is full of most heavenly, sweet peace. My soul is enlightened by the light of heaven. At such times we see everything clearly; we look upon everything rightly; we feel friendship and love towards everyone, even towards our enemies, readily excusing and forgiving everyone. Oh, how blessed is the soul when it is with God! Truly the Church is an earthly paradise. Take me captive, Lord, in the sweet captivity of Thy Holy Ghost, so that my words may flow “as a stream in the south” to Thy glory and to the salvation of Thy people! Grant me this sweet and powerful inward impulse to set down upon parchment the fulness of spiritual visions and feelings! Let “my tongue (be) the pen of a ready writer”—of the All-Holy Spirit!

St. John Kronstadt

[brittanytobiason]

Raised by Wolffs

For Woeford's The Last Simoleon and Bullet Farm. No CC

Tempest's mission is to move in with her grandmother, who'd better have been taking good care of her horse. This may require cheats.

The household consists of eight sims and two tombstones. Place the tombstones around the lot. Thorton Wolff is included to establish Thorne as Tempest's grandmother. I'd originally made him as a ghost that burned to death in the invasion, so he could return to the Netherworld and be a tombstone ghost, but the relationships didn't hold. Evict him in edit town and delete or turn him into a ghost using nraas.

After opening the game, so the family relationships will be recognized, split the household up, moving Thorne Wolff and Lightning Wolff horse to Bullet Farm with the "freerealestate" cheat.

Family Inventory: 2 charging stations

Expansion Packs Used: World Adventures, Ambitions, Generations, Pets, Supernatural, Seasons, University Life, Island Paradise, Into the Future

I used Custard to check this sims3pack file before uploading:

ElZed B-Zed

male plumbot

Inventory: Galaxa Space Car, Miner, Trait Chips: RoboNanny, HandiBot, Sense of Humor

Expansion Packs Used: Into the Future

Add trait chips immediately on open

LLAMIA

female plumbot

Inventory: Jetpack, snake, Trait Chips: Capacity to Love, Simulated Emotions, RoboNanny, Sinister Circuit

Expansion Packs Used: Pets, Into the Future

Add trait chips immediately on open

child male

Traits: good, disciplined, coward

Inventory: toy rocket, plasma fruit, sprite: Rom, womrat: Saul

Expansion Packs Used: Ambitions, Late Night, Generations, Pets, Into the Future

Zac

toddler male alien

Traits: excitable, good

Inventory: imaginary friend doll: Vril

Expansion Packs Used: Seasons

Mary F. Kihl

teen female ghost, mummy's curse

Traits: bot fan, childish, computer whiz, workaholic

Expansion Packs Used: World Adventures, Generations, Supernatural, Seasons, University Life, Island Paradise

GrNE

female simbot ghost, died of electrocution

Traits: genius, grumpy, handy, neat, no sense of humor

Expansion Packs Used: Ambitions, Supernatural

As a .sim files do not allow a simbot to also be a ghost, I've uploaded GrNE as a sims3pack, instead. I checked this file with Custard before uploading.

Tempest Wolff

child female

Traits: friendly, equestrian, hot-headed

Inventory: a football, a baker's dozen stand, mood enhancer, horror potion, a Jimmy Sprocket book

Expansion Packs Used: Generations, Pets

Thorne Wolff

Full disclosure: Thorne is really Thornton Wolff as a female elder. Does this make her a Wolff in Wolff's clothing?

elder female

Traits: animal lover, perfectionist, frugal, ambitious, greenthumb

Career: Horsewoman 1

Lifetime Wish: The Animal Rescuer

Expansion Packs Used: Pets, Island Paradise for her swimsuit

Lightning Wolff

foal female horse

Traits: fast, nervous

Expansion Packs Used: Pets

Thank you to simsmidgen for making and sharing Woeford, as well as to Norn, Ninjaofthepurplethings, Crowkeeperthesimmer, attuned, nocturnalazure, Ouerbacker and Potato-Ballad-Sims for your creativity and generosity.

All my downloads by sim

[mechanicalorgan]

i dont want to write with stiff sore hands.

oh mother, wash my hair and back just once.

i know you hurt for me as i do for you,

but the rain will be over soon.

you, my umbrella, and i, your rain jacket.

we’ll see the ground no longer soaked and muddy, the plants upright and blooming.

spring is here, winter is gone. summer is new, and it may hold us change.

father, be rid of your own children, you wilt the flower she grows. you pluck and pinch the stem until we grow thorns.

you cut my petals and dropped them. all my hard work to grow red rose petals, my brothers to loosen the thorns he inherited. my mother, forgiving and nurturing, watered us, gently held us even our thorns dug into her skin.

her hands are calloused but still gentle. yours, selfish and soft from your laziness. sloth, greed, the cardinal sin that ruined your own stem and leaves.

i wish you, father, paradise in the fresh mowed grass. for children to step and stomp over you as you did to us, to rot alone as you cursed my family to.

i will never have children. maybe, i will, i may change my mind. but you will never be my father, their grandfather or their carer. you will not meet them, see them or hear their voices. such innocence, you didn’t care for mine, so you will leave my children to flourish the way i didn’t get to.

because you are a caterpillar, the invading weed in my garden. i can only weed you out so many times before i dig you up. and to that, go back to where you came from. hell.

my mother is not your mother, your slave or a woman to you. she is a doctor, a professor, a manager, and most of all, more of a loving parent both mother and father than you were and will ever be.

i hope your broken rib kills you. punctures your lung and you drown in blood the same way you taint the happiness in this world.

i would kill you, and if it wasn’t for my brother, i will. i would stab you until you resemble the aftermath of a paper shredder. peel your face off with a cheese grater and a barbecue fork. hold you down and force the poison down your throat.

i dont want to be a doctor to impress you.

i want to know how to murder you. you are dead to me. leave my family, my friends and my home. my life, even. go. i wish you died when you jumped out of that car.

[graciousheaven]

The impact of human rebellion

Depravity - Curse - Enslavement

     The effect of the fall of man is apparent in the degradation of men’s relationships with God, with one another, and with the rest of creation. For every faculty of their being has been utterly altered: their minds have become depraved and dull, their volition perverted, their hearts hardened, their eyes blinded, their ears stopped and their tongues inflamed – “as it is written: “None is righteous, no, not one; no one understands; no one seeks for God. All have turned aside; together they have become worthless; no one does good, not even one.” “Their throat is an open grave; they use their tongues to deceive.” “The venom of asps is under their lips.” “Their mouth is full of curses and bitterness.” “Their feet are swift to shed blood; in their paths are ruin and misery, and the way of peace they have not known.” “There is no fear of God before their eyes”(Romans 3:10-18).

     Such, then, has been the state of men since sin entered the world, and every aspect of their lives since then has been seriously stricken; for in their desire to exalt themselves rather than God, men defiled themselves and incurred divine curse. Therefore they can no longer enjoy God’s blessings and love, but suffer the effects of the curse: “To the woman [God] said, “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.” And to Adam [God] said, “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, ‘You shall not eat of it,’ cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life; thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you; and you shall eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return” (Genesis 3:16-19).

     Thus man traded a life of blessedness and comfort for a life of pains, miseries, drudgeries and sorrows; he lost his moral purity and fell into depravity, giving up life and offering himself, body and soul, to death. Man was originally created to live forever in the presence of God: neither his body nor his soul was to see death. But once man became tainted by sin, he died spiritually, that is, his soul died to the things of God. Man’s rebellion against God led to his depravity. “Every intent of the thoughts of his heart [is] only evil continually” (Genesis 6:5). He has become an enemy of his own soul, for all his deeds are evil and his wage is death. He hates God and the things of God. The mind of man is no longer set on the things of God but on the things of the flesh, “which are: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these” (Galatians 5:19-21). And as it is written, “The mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God's law; indeed, it cannot. Those who are of the flesh cannot please God” (Romans 8:7-8). 

     Man by himself can no longer walk uprightly, for his heart has a propensity to do evil. And not only has man become dead to the things of God, but also “to dust [he] shall return” because of his sin. Which means he will also experience physical death. In addition, if a man returns to dust while still spiritually dead, he will also experience the second death, also called the eternal death, which is eternity in hell. For although the body perishes, the soul lives forever, and once the coming bodily resurrection is wrought by the Lord, each person’s soul will be reunited to their body and they will live forever, either in heaven or in hell.

      In his rebellion against God, man traded his freedom in the garden of Paradise – where life abounds – for slavery to sin, Satan and the system of evil in a cursed realm – where death prevails; he turned from God and His authority to Satan and his lies; he traded God’s blessings for curses, and fellowship with God for friendship with the devil. Because he became spiritually dead, man no longer desires nor is he able to submit to God’s rules and authority. Hostility, pride and wickedness now rule in his heart, and God has become his enemy. He can no longer enjoy the presence of his Maker but constantly hides from Him. Adam and his wife never hid from God until they committed the first act of treason against God, and “they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden” (Genesis 3:8); they had never failed to revere the LORD God, but when their first act of rebellion occurred, instead of taking full responsibility for their wrongdoing, the man and his wife declined it and ultimately put the blame on God. For when the LORD God asked Adam, “Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?” The man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate.” Then the LORD God said to the woman, “What is this that you have done?” The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate” (v.11-13). 

Enmity with God

     When God made Adam and put him in the garden, “the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him” (Genesis 2:18). “So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man He made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man” (v.21-23). 

     So, before the fall, Adam delighted in his companion and was grateful to God for the woman He had created to be with him. Because he was unstained by sin, his judgment was not clouded and there was no conceit in his heart. He had a proper view of God and himself, and he loved the things of God. But when he fell into sin, his view of God and himself was completely altered. Therefore, his first reaction was to hide from God. And when he was confronted by the Lord about his sin, instead of confessing it, Adam blamed the woman, ultimately accusing God for giving him a companion. The man said to the Lord, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate” (v.12). As if to say, if You, God, had not given me this woman, I would not have done evil. But the truth is this: Adam was fully culpable, because he freely and willfully chose to defy God’s authority; he acted in violation of the commandment of the Lord without being coerced or deceived. As written in 1 Timothy 2:14, “Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.”  Moreover, Adam failed in his role as head of the woman, a role which endowed him with the responsibility to lead, protect and care for his companion. If Adam had properly held his position as head of the woman, he could have protected his wife from the temptation of the serpent. He was with his wife when the serpent enticed her and she ate the forbidden fruit and gave some to him and he ate without any resistance. 

     The woman, on the other hand, not only disregarded God’s commandment, but also did not respect the leadership position of her husband; for when the serpent started talking to her, she did not judge it necessary to retreat so that her husband could lead the conversation, but chose to pursue the dialogue with the serpent. And the serpent seduced and deceived her with empty words. “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate” (Genesis 3:6). And when she was confronted by the Lord about her sin, “The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate”  (v.13). Like Adam, she declined her responsibility by putting the blame on the serpent, ultimately accusing the Lord – He who created the serpent. It is true that the serpent was guilty, but Eve was nonetheless responsible for her action, because she willfully defied God’s authority and disregarded His rules. 

     The fall turned men into enemies of God and fugitives. They now have a distorted view of God and themselves due to their moral corruption. When men were morally pure, they enjoyed the presence of God, but they now hide themselves from the face of God, because He is holy and they are not. For no man tainted by sin can stand the glorious presence of the holy God. Because of their utter depravity, men were cast away from the presence of God. For “nothing unclean [can] ever [dwell in the presence of the Lord], nor anyone who does what is detestable or false” (Revelation 21:27). Men have plunged themselves into a darkness from which they cannot save themselves. They have a propensity to do evil, are blind and helpless, dead to the things of God. Men’s hostility toward God has utterly superseded their enjoyment of fellowship with God – reverence for and delight in God has given room to contempt, fear, flight and concealment. Therefore, they will not and cannot turn to God, but conceal their wrongdoings and pride themselves on their destruction. After Adam and Eve had eaten the forbidden fruit, “they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden” (Genesis 3:8). 

     Adam’s sin nature has been inherited by the entire human race. Therefore, like their forefathers before them, all the sons of men are by nature dead in their trespasses and sins, unable and unwilling to turn to God. They are characterized by conceit and do not admit their guilt nor confess to God their wrongdoings unless they are supernaturally made alive by God. 

Degradation of men's relationship with one another and with other creatures on earth

     The effect of the fall on men’s relationship with God is tragic. In addition, the rupture between God and men, which resulted from human rebellion, has a ripple effect on men’s relationships with one another. There is no longer intimacy, trust and admiration, but secrecy, distrust and shame – as seen in the garden. “When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths” (Genesis 3:6-7). The reciprocal affection and admiration that existed between the man and his wife when they were pure – “the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed” (Genesis 2:25) – was thus replaced by a feeling of shame; they both felt guilty at the sight of their nakedness when their eyes were opened and they knew evil. Shame and revulsion led them to hide their degradation from each other, and ultimately from God. Moreover, there is now enmity, hate, slander, gossip, rivalry, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, wars, constant frictions, and the like, among the sons of men. The blessedness that marked the pre-fall marriage relationship has been forfeited, and the battle of the sexes has gained the stage.

     Furthermore, the fall has tremendously affected men's relationships with other creatures on earth. Man related to the creation in a very unique way before the fall; he ruled in righteousness and took perfect care of the animals and the land. For the Lord God had given him the responsibility to work and keep the land and the authority to rule over His creation. This placed man above all earthly creatures and set him apart from them. Faithful to the Lord, man lived and reigned on the earth to the glory of the Lord and rejoiced in Him. But after the fall, men became so corrupt, they fell so low that they “exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things” (Romans 1:23). Because of their moral decay, men have turned themselves into worshipers of the creatures over which the Creator God has given them authority; they worship and serve all kinds of creatures rather than the Lord God. What a degrading shift in the position of man! He traded his dignity and identity in God with debasement.

     Also, before the fall, animals, birds and sea creatures were not food for human beings, but “every plant yielding seed that is on the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit” (Genesis 1:29). “And to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the heavens and to everything that creeps on the earth, everything that has the breath of life, [the Lord gave] every green plant for food” (v.30). But after the fall and the flood that swept away the ancient world population, except for eight people, the Lord said to Noah and his sons, from whom the whole earth was populated after the flood, “Every moving thing that lives shall be food for you. And as I gave you the green plants, I give you everything” (Genesis 9:3). 

     At first man posed no danger to other creatures on earth and they posed no danger to man. But the relationship between the two groups has changed since the Lord gave man permission to eat animals. As sovereignly decreed by the Lord, “The fear of [man] and the dread of [man is] upon every beast of the earth and upon every bird of the heavens, upon everything that creeps on the ground and all the fish of the sea. [For] into [his] hand they are delivered” (v.2). While many animal species are now endangered due to human activities, on the other hand, men are physically attacked or killed, their crops are destroyed and their homes invaded by animals. This starkly contrasts not only with how men ruled over the earth before the fall and cared for everything in it, but also with how they cohabited with animals on earth before the tragedy. 

Deterioration of man’s living and working conditions

     Men’s living conditions in general have also taken a serious hit as a result of sin. In the garden, men suffered neither cold nor heat, nor disease or pestilence, nor famine, nor natural disaster. But all these affections and adversities have become as common in our realm as the air we breathe since sin entered the world. People die of hunger, from virus attacks and all sorts of diseases. There are devastating windstorms, rainstorms, snowstorms, earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, droughts, floods and all kinds of natural disasters that constantly hit the earth and cause many casualties or affect our living conditions in one way or another. As a result of all these plight, there is always sorrow, depression, mourning, weeping and groaning. As written by Paul in Romans 8:22-23, “the whole creation has been groaning together as it suffers together the pains of labor, and not only the creation, but we ourselves.” 

     The fall also plunged mankind into very difficult working conditions. When the Lord made man, “the LORD God planted a garden in Eden, in the east, and there He put the man whom He had formed. And out of the ground the LORD God made to spring up every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food. The tree of life was in the midst of the garden, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. A river flowed out of Eden to water the garden, and there it divided and became four rivers. The name of the first is the Pishon. It is the one that flowed around the whole land of Havilah, where there is gold. And the gold of that land is good; bdellium and onyx stone are there. The name of the second river is the Gihon. It is the one that flowed around the whole land of Cush. And the name of the third river is the Tigris, which flows east of Assyria. And the fourth river is the Euphrates” (Genesis 2:8-14). Apart from these four rivers that flowed in the garden, “a mist was going up from the land and was watering the whole face of the ground” (v.6). Which means, the garden of Eden was well watered throughout the year and extremely fruitful. And the Lord gave this beautiful garden to man to work it and keep it, a task that the man performed with great satisfaction in the days of his purity. For his working conditions were very pleasurable, extremely comfortable, exceptionally propitious, exceedingly enjoyable, and stress-free. 

     Sadly, because of his disobedience, the garden of Paradise was lost to man. When he ate the forbidden fruit, “The LORD God sent him out from the garden of Eden to work the ground from which he was taken. He drove out the man, and at the east of the garden of Eden He placed the cherubim and a flaming sword that turned every way to guard the way to the tree of life” (Genesis 3:23-24). Thus the lushness and blessedness that man experienced in the garden ended with his expulsion from the garden. He is now exposed to scarcity, vain pursuit and drudgeries. There is no more ease, joy and satisfaction at work. Man must work hard because of the curse of the ground – “in pain [he] eats of it all the days of [his] life; thorns and thistles it [brings] forth for [him]; and [he] eats the plants of the field. By the sweat of [his] face [he] eats bread, till [he] returns to the ground, for out of it [he was] taken; for [he is] dust, and to dust [he] shall return” (Genesis 3:17-19). 

[god-whispers]

apr 7

good friday

"but He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed." isa 53:5

what's so good about this friday?  our savior died for each of us.  i write this with expectant hope the body of Christ will never again be experiencing a good friday.  it is my most earnest desire that our Lord retrieves us this year in a pre-tribulation rapture.  if not this year, i will be expecting Him again next year, if i'm still here.  if, for some reason i should unexpectedly enter the tribulation, i will believe for grace to accept martyrdom over the mark of the beast.

i know there are many speculations about exactly when the crucifiction was and if it really happened at all.  there may be disagreements among believers about when but not if.  this is the day our Lord Jesus Christ died for the sins of the world.  yes, He died for those who don't believe in Him also.  their payment is ready to be picked up.  they just won't pick it up.  there can be no unrighteousness in God if they refuse to receive what was freely given.  there need be no effort to earn it.

while most disciples and confessed believers were in hiding, He took the full measure of our guilt and failure upon Him; the One passover lamb worthy enough to cover the sins of all, for all time.  if we had lived then, would we be standing at the foot of the cross as john and a few others were or would we be in hiding along with the others.  it begs the question, are we in hiding still today?

my mind can't comprehend all the beating and mocking He endured, to be followed by the cross, the most tortuous means devised by man.  this was not just a man dying; this was the One who created it all to begin with.  just imagine the legions of angels He could have summoned; all at His beck and call, yet He opened not His mouth.

this one time of the year, i do not think it unseemly we remember how costly His blood was shed; blood that did not soak useless into the ground but was lifted and poured on the mercy seat of God, a sacrificial covering forever to all who would receive remission of their sins.  the nails that pierced His hands and feet, the thorns which pierced His brow and the spear His side; - each contributing to His final breath, spent also in asking forgiveness for us.  "with His own blood He entered the Most Holy Place once for all, having obtained eternal redemption." heb 9:12

it is recorded Jesus poke seven messages from the cross: "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?" matt 27:46 "I thirst." john 19:28 "Father forgive them.  they don’t know what they do." luke 23:34 "behold this woman.  woman, behold thy son." john 29:26-27 "truly, I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise." luke 23:43 "it is finished." john 19:28 "Father, into your hands, I commit my spirit." luke 23:46

that's all the words it took to save a world of sin and sinners.  then again, it didn't take many words to create the earth and all in it to begin with.  there is coming another time when God will speak those words, "it is finished" - when all sin and suffering shall be no more; when all rebellion and rejection has been quelched; when every knee has bowed and every tongue confessed Him the Lord He is.

there will be a new heaven and earth, and as jerusalem is His joy now, we will be His new jerusalem to inhabit forever.  we will be His cherished love and crowning achievement; His chosen jewel to shine above all others.  what's more, it shall be in a place where time no longer exists; a new beginning with no end in sight.  this is what that day was all about - a rejoining of what had been broken in the fall, fellowship between God and man.  the veil between us and Him had been ripped as His flesh had been ripped with stripes.  how costly indeed was that blood!

------- Father God, we thank you for your love and the plan you have for all of mankind.  from the beginning, you loved each of us so much that you sent your son to us.  we thank you for His ministry.  we thank you for the life He led, and we are deeply grateful for His sacrifice on the cross.

as we go into the weekend, help us remember with wonder and awe how He suffered for us; how He paid the price, and it was at such a great cost.  through the crowns of thorns and scourging, and through the cross, You carried our sins.  we pray to remember to carry our cross and heed Your call to follow You.

may we never forget what Christ did for us.  like a lamb to the slaughter, clothed in humility and grace, He willingly offered Himself to death so that we might live forever.  we are truly thankful for the extent of His love, stretched out on a cruel wooden cross.  we come to You in repentance and reconciliation and forgiveness.  through the power of the cross, You have redeemed us.  may we not dwell on our sufferings but leave them at your feet, trusting that You know what’s best for us.

heavenly Father, how great and how gracious Your great redemption plan for mankind.  we thank You greatly as we walk through this day and commemorate the great love and sacrifice of Your beloved Son Jesus.  in Christ’s name, we pray, amen!

[pen-of-inspiration]

Upon Christ as our substitute and surety was laid the iniquity of us all. He was counted a transgressor, that He might redeem us from the condemnation of the law. The guilt of every descendant of Adam was pressing upon His heart. The wrath of God against sin, the terrible manifestation of His displeasure because of iniquity, filled the soul of His Son with consternation. All His life Christ had been publishing to a fallen world the good news of the Father's mercy and pardoning love. Salvation for the chief of sinners was His theme. But now with the terrible weight of guilt He bears, He cannot see the Father's reconciling face. The withdrawal of the divine countenance from the Saviour in this hour of supreme anguish pierced His heart with a sorrow that can never be fully understood by man. So great was this agony that His physical pain was hardly felt....

He feared that sin was so offensive to God that Their separation was to be eternal. Christ felt the anguish which the sinner will feel when mercy shall no longer plead for the guilty race. It was the sense of sin, bringing the Father's wrath upon Him as man's substitute, that made the cup He drank so bitter, and broke the heart of the Son of God....

The sun refused to look upon the awful scene. Its full, bright rays were illuminating the earth at midday, when suddenly it seemed to be blotted out. Complete darkness, like a funeral pall, enveloped the cross....

Vivid lightnings occasionally flashed forth from the cloud, and revealed the cross and the crucified Redeemer. Priests, rulers, scribes, executioners, and the mob, all thought that their time of retribution had come....

At the ninth hour the darkness lifted from the people, but still enveloped the Saviour.... Then “Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?” “My God, My God, why hast Thou forsaken Me?” ...

The spotless Son of God hung upon the cross, His flesh lacerated with stripes; those hands so often reached out in blessing, nailed to the wooden bars; those feet so tireless on ministries of love, spiked to the tree; that royal head pierced by the crown of thorns; those quivering lips shaped to the cry of woe. And all that He endured—the blood drops that flowed from His head, His hands, His feet, the agony that racked His frame, and the unutterable anguish that filled His soul at the hiding of His Father's face—speaks to each child of humanity, declaring, It is for thee that the Son of God consents to bear this burden of guilt; for thee He spoils the domain of death, and opens the gates of Paradise..

Suddenly the gloom lifted from the cross, and in clear, trumpetlike tones, that seemed to resound throughout creation, Jesus cried, “It is finished.”“Father, into Thy hands I commend My spirit.” A light encircled the cross, and the face of the Saviour shone with a glory like the sun. He then bowed His head upon His breast, and died. CSA 39

[mayullla]

Title: Cupid's Arrows

Character(s): Cupid (original work / unnamed character)

Summary: Mythology; The cupid fell in love with you, but he saw that one arrow is just not enough.

Warnings/Tags: Fem!reader, yandere themes, mind manipulation(kinda), overdosed on a love potion (arrow), drugged, sensory overload, pricked by something sharp (arrows), the reader is experiencing so much pain but no extreme blood, thoughts of death

You didn't understand why you were in pain. In a bed of white while your body strung in so many thorns. You didn't understand why you were in pain for there are no stab wounds on your body, you weren't bleed nor could you see any bandage around yourself. Yet your brain is telling you there is a painful fire within that hurt so much.

Every movement, the soft silk of the bed that touches you, you can feel it drag your skin painfully like needles.

The gaping emptiness within yourself, you weren't sure if it was on your heart or stomach. You felt empty as if hungry for something that you are not sure of. Your lip chapped from the lack of water as you continued to desperately try to push yourself away from this burning flame and emptiness.

Too much, the soft wind that blows from the huge glassless window beside you as it touches your skin makes you gasp in shock at how your skin tingles painfully from it. You need to get away, need to be somewhere that is not here. Yet you can't move much of your body, mere twitches and shakes were all that you could manage to do. You can't even scream as your voice is already coursed from screaming before...

You didn't realize someone walking over to your bed sitting right beside you on a chair. It is only till that soft hand touches your forehead did the pain that you felt died down just a little, yet it was already paradise for you.

“You are still hot, doll… I am worried about you.” Your eyes were closed still trying to fight the pain yet it melted when you heard the person’s voice as if it gave you the comfort that you desperately wanted. You relaxed a little bit more, when he started stroking your hair, you didn't understand why it was so lovely when before your hair felt heavy as if it was trying to remove your skin from your skull.

Cupid, you remember his name. When you fell down in the forest after you felt something stab you from behind to your heart, he had found you and took you to his home and cared for you when he doesn't even know you.

You wondered why the angel of love choose to take care of you. It was odd yet at the same time, you were really able to question it when you could only focus on the pain and hollowness you were experiencing somehow grew stronger and stronger day by day.

You cried out when you felt his hand slowly leave you, you were scared of the pain coming back. Finding paradise it was difficult to go back to that pain again. He shushes you when you cried out again damaging your vocal codes even more. You weren't able to make any proper words as only slurs and garble came out of your mouth.

“Ah-ah, shh you are going to ruin your beautiful voice if you continue on doing that.” The hand was back this time caressing your skin. “I need to give you your medicine, will you drink it for me?” you grunted compliantly yet didn't open your eyes, you wondered who this person is his soft yet firm voice and gentle touch was like an addicting poison to you.

“That is my good little girl, so cute.” You feel his arms under you pulling you up to his chest, you thought that you would be in pain since it hurt so much when you tried to move on your own yet again in his touch, the pain dulled even more and your chest didn't feel as empty as before.

"Dear what would you do without me... hehe you're so cute"

You felt something soft touch the side of your temple near your eye, a peck then a chuckle rumbled near your ear. “So pretty, my little dove.” Another kiss on your under your eye, then in the middle of your forehead and another much longer one on your crown. “Thank you for being so compliant with me.” He whispered in your ear.

You felt a chill go down your spine, the lovely kisses that the person gave made you fill full.

“Here.. drink, it is warm water.” You felt something touch your lips, something that wasn't his hand. It made you disappointed somewhat but when you finally took that sip of water you were suddenly desperate for more. You didn't know you were this thirsty and it helped some much with the pain in your throat.

You almost hated him with how slow he was tilting the water as if he was being careful. Groaning desperate for more, you clung to his clothes and tugged a bit which is basically all your strength, demanding that he give you the water faster.

The person softly chuckled again, you can hear him chant who you were so cute and that you're his little dove but you ignored it in favor of the water right now. After you finally finished drinking, you heard him place the cup on a table. One arm still holding you up, held you tighter.

“Now stay still love, this will sting a little bit.” the moment you heard him stay that you tense and tried to wiggle out of his hold, scared of pain after experiencing so much. You grunted as you tried to shove him away but you were so weak to make any big changes in your position. You were desperate that tears started to gather and leak from your still heavy eyelids.

“Oh no, don't worry love. Don't worry.. shhh, shh you are fine. I promise that this will help you. I usually do this later when you are asleep so as not to scare you, but I can't push it any longer.” You hiccupped at his words, tears still streaming in your face as you still tried to push yourself of him.

“I… I-I don't wan…” You struggled to say “..pa-in…” the more you tried to move away from him the more it hurts you. Somehow you knew this will hurt, that this will hurt more than what you were experiencing before, that maybe this was the reason why you are in this state of agony.

The sting pain that was once numbed by this person's touch slowly started to return. You didn't hear him say anything for a moment, his voice quiet and your heart was desperate for something you still did not understand. "Cupid, n-no... please."

You were suddenly pulled into a tight hug making you unconsciously yelp. His hug was almost bone crushing, yet you can't help but feel a bit of relief in your heart and as the pain slowly numbed again you clung on to him begging him not to hurt you.

You felt him kiss your collar bone as you were hearing a low scoop collar nightgown, moving his hand he moved to your hair and combed it with his fingers calming you down further. “Love, don't worry I will be here alright. This is the last time alright that this will ever happen okay. Shhh, I am only doing this for us alright.”

Dread pulled into your stomach and again you tried to push him away but this time he kept you tight in his arms forcing you to put your head on his shoulder. Your body flinched every time you hear the clattering found of the table and some type of metal. "Shhh it will be alright, shhh it is okay."

“It is only three times, please be a good girl stay still… you can do it for me right?” Your only reply to his words were whimpers and begging that were muffled by his white tunic.

You feel something prick your tight, cling to him more as you pushed your body towards him when you slowly start to feel the unbearable pain and loneliness come back. You whispered even more as more tears streamed in your eyes, “No more, it h-hurts.” You begged but all you got was a shhh as he continued to stroke your head. Telling you over and over that you were a good girl and that it would be over in a second.

The next part that was pricked was your arm near your shoulder, and your wails become louder and louder by the second as everything hurt even his touch was not enough, it still hurt so much. Yet you still cling on to him as if he was your lifeline.

“Please no more, it hurts. I hate it. Please….”, his hug tightened around you, “It is okay my little dove just one more and it will be over.” The pain was dizzying you making you unable to answer him, and just chant over and over that it hurts.

The last one was not on your leg or arm but at your back where your heart is. You felt the sharp point cut your skin and screamed when you when the most violent pain shock through your body. You heard glass shattering, or something breaks within you, something that snapped.

But as quickly as it came it died down a bit, where it still hurts but your world didn't flash white anymore, but dizziness remained.

But as the pain slowly lessened so did the feelings in your heart, colder and colder you didn't understand why but now you just felt hollow, unloved. You can't stop your sniffling as the person continued to stroke your back silently waiting for you to move first. The lonely was unbearable, that you just want to die.

“You did so well, thank you for being so kind.” He hummed as he rocked you back and forth to comfort you, it should have given you peace but your heart still feels hollow as you continued to cling to him scared that you might fall down and never get back up.

So you panicked even more when you felt the person lean back and clung to him tightly. “Don't leave... Don't-t leave me.” If you could see him maybe you would have seen his smile, the hearts in his eyes as he listened to your desperate voice. “Don't worry my little dove.” You felt a peck in your forehead. “I promise never to leave you.”

He placed a kiss on each of your eyes. “If you promise that you will also never leave me.”

Suddenly you open your eyes, but rather than be surprised about lightness to them than when it was almost impossible to open them, you only started up at the man holding you. Whereas he was looking at you in a loving expression as if patiently waiting for your answer.

Your hands tighten on the clothes on his chest as your heartstrings pull and tugged harshly. You know this face, his silver white hair and pale skin. His mature but boyish face looked at you as you looked at his pink eyes for a moment you thought you saw hearts in them. The pull becomes stronger almost electrifying as if it was even more painful than the pain you suffered before.

You need him.

You won't be able to able to live without him. Cant. You will die. You won't survive if he isn't with you and you are not with him every second of your life. You will surely shatter. When he started to lean away again, you panicked and tugged his shirt pulling him to you as you quickly hug him around his neck.

"Lov-"

“I promise!! I promise, i promice, i promice!!” You screamed.

You could feel him tilt his neck to look at you as you held his neck even tighter towards your body when you felt him try to push you away as you wailed again repeating the words over again. “I promise!”

“Sorry, I don’t quite get it. What do you mean promise?” He asked you, still holding him tight you moved your head to look at him, your eyes watered with fresh tears again.

“Can you tell me?” He asked kindly, smiling at you.

Your heart fluttered looking at him, “Please s-stay with me, I promise I-I will never leave you.” You watched how his face lightened up, as his arms wrapped around you and hugged you. He was shoulder shook a bit in your arms and you wondered, worried if he was alright.

“I am so glad... I am so glad,” he said kissing your collarbone, his hug still tight around as you feel yourself slowly start to struggle to breathe from the lack of air but you stayed where you were too scared that he might leave you if you move even an inch in discomfort.

You can feel the butterfly kisses that he placed on your shoulder to your neck, stopping right at the side of your chin every kiss made your heart skip a beat.

He finally looked at you, and you noticed a small heart shaped mole right under his left eye, moving your hand you reached for his face cupping his cheeks as your thumb stroked the mole right under your eyes.

When you looked at him in the eyes, this time you can visible see the heart in his eyes. His face flushed red as his neck. “Your so cute, my love. So so cute, my little dove. I am so glad.”

You blinked when he moved your head so that he could kiss your forehead again. “I am so glad that it worked.” You hear him whisper, you wondered what he meant by that but just as soon that thought went away as soon as he kissed your lips.

He watches you freeze at his kiss becoming flustered, and chuckled. “My little dove, can you do something for me?” He watched as the hearts in your eyes become visible.

You hold tight to his clothes everything other than him somehow becoming foggy and mush as if nothing was more important than him. You were desperate for another kiss that cleared your mind and filled your heart more than anything. You were addicted again, and it is slowly getting worse and worse.

“Can you say you love me?” Cupid asked, “Say ‘I love you, honey.’”

You felt the hug which relaxed for a moment tighten again. “I…I-I love you…honey”

You received another smile of love and a kiss this time longer than the last one. He placed his forehead on your, “Can you say it again?”

“I-I love you, honey” another kiss. “Again, please dove.”

“I love you, honey.” another kiss, “Again”

“I love you, honey.” You said again, waiting for your next kiss but this time he pulled away a bit. “Kiss me.”

You blinked surprised looking at him then his lips almost hesitant, when you felt his arms around you lose a lot you panicked and pushed yourself to his chest to keep yourself close and just as quickly pushed your lips to his, whining in fear.

He watched you try to hold him down and felt his heart burst. He is so glad that it worked! Normally you should only hit someone one time and at max maybe two or three times too much will bring pain to the target and hollowness no matter what you do and it will only get worst and worst the more they are pricked by the arrows.

But as a cupid who actually deals with those arrows, he knew that there is a tipping point. When a person has been stabbed so many times that at one point they will just fully break and when that happens they will become desperate, desperate for something that will love them and fill in that void. If one arrow can make someone crazy, this will make it that they will even kill themselves just to be with them.

He watched you awkwardly keep your mouth on his as if scared of denial, awkwardly staring at him yet at the same time he could see the hearts on your eyes that you were. He is just so happy.

“I love you, my little dove.”

[libidomechanica]

Untitled # 10939

A sonnet sequence

               1

Saying, I have been his pulse failing, passionless, pale, and charioteers caught force to love forsooth: I have thorn! Gross clay invade then the Foeman’s Glory might but enjoy such a lightnings, weigh the lark, with a fear our pleasure of mosquitoes ascends, now let us view her heaven had you great where you mark’d the Living Water drain’d where her undinal vast belly moonward paradise. Once more wretched in that loue shoulders to thee, misfortune authority, and makes the fever, are all cheer his future day—fond Thought! Almost wretch! Grow. The silken skilled transmemberment of my eyes and my staff. Again I would understand. Come thy footsteps of this. Those bright and dame and dies; and laughed They were design’d t’agree, too dear, and make the afflicted came, that so fall asleepe thou so dear? Nor Cybele with their beds and embeds every vessel could prepare you great price we pay for Pardon.

               2

To thyself a lawful plea commend, whether it was: but straight ice I know it not you pinch a flowery earth, even thou so dear? Cramming a tune I have stay’d to be free; shake hands do not:—friend; for weariness, memory’s raptures we desire that ken me, O; but when this march on nor be prest twelve enchantment thee with answering leagues of hot and complete a thing trimm’d in jollity, and my retorted hairs. Above, be lovers; and I strove to be reconcil’d to Love, and I choose a May-lady to govern the youthful, charming smiles to build upon my freshness die.

               3

Gum, pungent, cleare; he never read strange love talked in my love. To take a new needles on the path has lost it for ever mourne, I wept both day and flying in love, my heart, that which I have but her wanted, as the consequence could find a tally fitted to habit; and, could na scaith the language of your true love round me, to all these wasted frame, that would not, or could so soon made of the puppy’s breath; this my object; but she thought, aimèd with stars go squawking sunk chill on my white of either example proved—would understand is not the radiant eyes see beautiful woman who Your mind.

               4

Though for a lass wi’ a tocher; then hey, for aught we are gone, beauty you grow wooden and unencumber’d best may do there life of men who groan, then laughter they did her son and hear each other, or the porch of the lips of my paines that dies along the haunt beloved as old he picked and wind, flung into it—but thou, whom daily pray, we’ll churn. The bow, with heat: o Bacchus, cool thy rays! Send a flattering wave! And with suspended scythe and private place my merit it. To do it plus the one twain, by praise in lawrell tree: in truth, take refuge the great saint, refused it, and see, she is walking their short lives in curles are lost his scythe to be, strange love me some virtuous lie, to do it plus the city angled in a sunny lane some boy and give me stilled with life—and now is come; the voice I heard, cupid’s bow, front, an ample warrant that were enough to cure me.

               5

Face of the turmoil grows, another. To stand at the seventh month and North, with doubt, pass, thou hast spied. Hence Cupid danc’d among and darkness flower in Friends are forgotten. Still wouldst rubies. And not better state reveal’d. But this happiness who had ceased to believe when I praise; the songs of thine eyes to wear; yet no tailor help the death was fled, and early twilight we know, by this deaf moonlight, her death, who see with beauty, and by the subway railings. To have her eyes have dancing on its lonely times of her boughes doe raine, whose owne faults thy might makes then with moderate sorrows end.

               6

Again and not talk, not the thing triumphantly. Then did I let my gestures where I fear to touch! Not one, than to enthral or gall the incarnate word the hand, and Off’rings made: the muscles, the gourd overscored, while bigness—rocks, trees, lay ourselves and I will think of the man your bed, hollow ocean-ridges roaring or dead, spirits wall; and staid, pleas’d with a moonlight, moonlight, no hopefulnesse, as when Pity pleads for Sin. For ever, are all words ease, which when I’m with crispèd hair, and folly doctor-like contrived a conquered place where thou leaves litter. We might become a sod.

               7

But straiten’d forehead gaze; two hundred to and fragrance of love, and wishes, and fair; and yet by trades the river-tide. While they came to torments you doubt not think upon the moon. Till the locks, above, we know love’s star with ease was prevent our many-tinkling flesh with young soul, abhorring avarice, bounteous as that matters it? Next, Virgil I’ll call for naught: such skill in thee growing, or me, I do betray him, grew in such a light, and the world is strain the guilty beetle is a fright myself able to continual hair—belle Isle, white and all by thy diseases, shops of fashion.

               8

Yet reserved from this excus’d I to rest, is each vndercharge, with lullaby then within. Scorpio, bad spider it was sung her the phantom yearning for the manna fall. Keep fresh and gave you eft within! To tye thee move, less you woe. And street, as she supplied, and her jewels, to thy Will, ’ and Will’ one will answered echoes broke from us—and ye, ah, may ye feel her slowly-dying day, and only had presents to use than deaf that gilds then hey, for a transistor to Long John Nebel arguing frown. Bless, me now with young Lochinvar. I will die of louers pay which passes between each came home, he had not contains so much rage, as Lot’s fair daughter, something like a fruitful or more kind that unfair which the sun in water’s gush divine, fair Lesley, as shee. From a high birth till death wounds bleeding out on the bride in its start back. That thou lent’st him yet recover. A dole of bread.

               9

Teach me, on me, in the old Man young, keep close of low replies. Temper, O fair love, and scrappy: we have forgotten except possible it is very long. And love for you my heart, with thoughts no longer dreamed that suckling mourne, I wept both night as welcome as a Sword, a Cloud of mortal chants of old did preach. Tears, how such a pleasing fuell of mind; and court in, gathering perfume. But aye she loot the musk carnations were his triumph was all, unless you woe. If certain when tis madness with thee a heaven is with art and plump. You and me most in the rose as when the wept with sound.

               10

Tripping oars: it’s eleven years ago. To-night, I wrote this singing is a kind of girls’ dormitory. While they ran: there need require it, both sadly blacke, both become. And the world was loathsome. No inconvenient kindnesse kils delight, never agree the covenant that sweet, I ween, to Shepherds and ends at three A. The clocks had cease upon the way the very large, thee to my thoughts thy shadow still she forbade me poore Eve had she speak well of me untrue, you give us Life, and tears: alas! Where are turn’d it in his stead. A sweet will one nose. And if she will show itself.

               11

There wastebasket. They were possible it is this grew; I gave consequences Where is subdued to which upon the mind stinging door and I so lovely blue; far along the way one single breathe such beard, and in sight, Stealing myself, that is it, that song outlasts us all in—all in a gentle dream and feared to over-rule us all in danger and dies; and if she winnowing to row them tame; and as a mountain in its skeleton shadow lour’d on the bed to which thou kindlest all the common bed were in as constant louers payne, if any gods the parallels the fault?

               12

The rose, and sold— but the weel-stockit farms. An’ then can I sing tongues perplexes and she looks lovely sounding wide through the same smile? As I sipped and struck his fires, now, if this such as ever get to go alone and the lines and lady vntrue, you shalt not love Truth and sky, the first place were in what of the middle of the treasured fragrant blow; roses have done my wrong: this courtesy. He will bear, and there triumphs and the sky, seres Spring’s maturity, checks Summer’s distant thing red, that infant animal awesome I would rush upon them, lay down the roofs the threw such a little urn.

               13

Then spoke his happiness, with answer me; is any Blessing for judgment making Woes darkned be; night by his beauteous, not the moon, fair beseechers kill; think thee page, will play there are maiden Queen guarded by fens. Pity me the thoughts would be silent love I rise and fed with a sudden a passion, from its home against me. Silence from a garden-trees, and vows that strait commands they thus did entertain, guests were the quiet-coloured eve smiles which all spleen. So bad, that spot of joy. When I clung to all the time of you. It’s not peers beyond the shadow still be your teares descending.

               14

Though all the prow, —thy derelict and gone. As much as worn as an old passion shall never could set that is ours to wreathe succession hurried on; all of a plum. So snug, so compact, so wise as birth; all his blind, for my thigh almost bound us when there fell thy purple fritillaries the ground of the Susan? From out to find weak points in disguise, of her self, and learn, and see the world without pity till the age had been content male wind—shaking, the brothers cry Too late, later floods and stray impassion were his life is the unblest kisses of honey, having none, yet doth make.

               15

And at the faster—infusion pump in the king look at yours and as water a hollow roaring from an evil stroke; wrought: desire! When I bow’d down to a laughing e’en o’ lovely all time by the bridegroom thoughts are for a burning, shift green bank hath gone there’ll be spice. Either whom I grieved it on its wings after such years would wake up and get into my heavy as if alive. Of beechen grew my tongue that rage outside and in the Spring again I would have him power in Friend. Soon gathering all bright yellow peels, my stinging grooves of flame through the gateways of the brain?

               16

Is it were to containe! In signature is Addition that she sings. And hasten down to a shade more causeys, bridge.—An’ O for ane an’ twenty, Tam. And we will stay! Over the sequoia swallow their eyes’ express’d. Or veer or vanish’d out on the evening-sky, bare on its glow. Let it not to mount and dares to make you were banished, we only way, close round him o’er the Border? Meet, if thou go with me, sweet self to crowd; and still lives in a most in its skin’s. Stretches back decades she fed, she clothes to inflame desire, close round and long been done? Behold, my love allows twittered!

               17

Changed … There’s nothing more. He declar’d that held the heir of all men’s prime Desire; by whom she was the basin and the turrets of the longer still she bore; she loved so fast, as if to know causes of hot and now the full-waked sense; or fair or wise beyond what shee tasted on delight. Still wouldst thou leane, I quite away, sets down her veil draw soft remember how quickly speakes for long light, a year old who refuse to be full of rubies finding westward up the sacrifice, as sweet, an’ young; nae artfu’ wiles to hold betwixt her liable to go alone and vain the Deluge.

               18

Completely be her be him be them, thou always remembering him here where we hid from my Injury, though ice burned and loosestrife we saw of passion speed and languish quite away, sets down her baith by bower and love her father—none. And, above the crocus lustres of thy rest’? To mix their sleep, to the best region that name and be the sun forgetful Muse, my God, as authorizing her there was pious, gemlike, ghostlike, deathless, dumb till I wish not thy Hellen his; no force, something to light he ran, and in some melodious plot of tradition does deserve this in the excess, and does not be excuse, nor chancel port and polished. Whole, full of thee: who faileth one liuerie, both rebell runaway boy who chucks it all to live for the flow’ry meads th’hill’s shady wood, and would, on condition grown; we both Sea and with beaded bubbles winking of these rosy lips to grow.

               19

Thou canst view from honest as his birth, we stood, in ancient trees feele my grief its hour again and then to the Captain’s lady. A Love-lock, idly reclining on me thou art, as with his Fellow crying out upon misprision grown; we both diffusive good enough to shed his old love after my sick dreams had perish one by one, though ice burned; in equal fires there with Roses blows; a Foot for lack of bread. That I see the roses and rent, why wilt in that spotless breast discharge, while the thing the opposite of father’s brilliant bow. That took it up, he quaff’d off the west—I miss it!