#The Night of the Capybaras (episode)

[inspectorspacetimerevisited]

Three years ago, viewers finally got a Halloween-themed episode, ‘The Disaster on Samhain’.

As Halloween has become more and more popular, it was a reflection of changes in British society.

[yuurei20]

Summarized transcript of the Twisted Radio episode with Octavinelle (and Jack) voice actors!! 🥳 (all is just paraphrased, not direct quotes, and Book 7 spoilers removed!)

Highlights:

・it is very long but if you read nothing else, i recommend just reading the opening talk about what animals they would be, because it is one of the greatest things in the world.

Begins with Jack’s VA Ban (🐺) introducing the show, as he is one of the regular hosts. He begins with explaining that last month’s recording with the Savanaclaw group was very pleasant.

Azul’s Tamaru (🐙) Jade’s Komada (🐬) and Floyd’s Okamoto (🦈) are this month’s guest!

🐺 talks about how 🐙 was a guest on the show in January, but 🐬 and 🦈 are appearing for the first time.

They have 🐬 say the Twisted Radio name (he was raised in Germany and is trilingual, with English and German), he does a good job with pronunciation ✨

Opening Talk

Topic decided last week: if you were beast-person, what kind of animal would you like to be based on?

Last week 🦁 said he would be a baby hippo, 🐺 said a housecat and 🍩 said red-eyed crocodile skink, which no one knows what it is ww

🦈 Komodo dragon. Because the name is cool.

🐬 There is something lizard about you, yes.

Now they are talking about how fast Komodo dragons are. 

🐬 Rhino. They look really cool. With the horn and they are fast—not even a Komodo dragon would go after a rhino.

🦈 If I was a Komodo dragon, 🐬 as a rhino would be big—I wouldn’t go for him. Maybe just his pinky finger.

🐙 Capybara.

Everyone laughs.

🐙 I like baths. Capybara are always taking baths and look so comfortable.

🐬 A rhino and a komodo dragon and a capybara.

🦈 The capybara is on top.

🐺 None of this is what I’d imagined.

🐬 What did you imagine about us? I won’t hit you with my horn.

🦈 I won’t bite you with my poison teeth.

🐙 Let’s take a bath together.

Everyone laughs.

🦈 The nuance is a little different for just one of us.

🐺 I’d imagined cats or dogs or something. Everyone goes for cool animals.

🦈 We all go for wild things.

🐬 The capybara?

🐙 One of us is not as wild as the others.

Reading a letter from a fan

They say they love the new birthday series and are excited about the MyRoom look for Azul, Jade and Floyd and what to know what the voice actors where casually at home, and how they refresh themselves after a long day.

🦈 says that Floyd’s MyRoom look was exactly how he’d imagined it would be and he really liked it.

🐬 says he was surprised by Jade’s bedhead. It was so cute. Floyd’s was intense, too.

🐙 Floyd could have just kept his hair like that and it would have been fine.

🐬 I thought Jade was the type to say “good night” and fall asleep immediately and then wake up again in the exact same position in the morning, but he moves! I was impressed.

They talk about how it is a “gap” of Jade’s, the difference between what one would expect and how it actually is.

🐬 But those were exactly the pajamas I had imagined.

🦈 I imagine that 🐬 wears pajamas like Jade’s.

🐬 Incorrect.

🐺 Are you closer to Floyd’s, with the hoodie and the tank top?

🐬 I was until last year. It changed this year. 

🦈 A bathrobe?

🐙 Do you sleep wearing the clothes you intend to wear the next day? So you can just wake up and go?

🐬 Efficient but no, that is not it. I wear recovery pajamas. They improve blood circulation and refresh you quicker. I’ve been wearing those all this year. 

🦈 Those would be a good birthday present for someone. 

🐺 What do you wear, 🦈?

🦈 Warm. I get cold easily. I wear down jackets on airplanes and things, even in summer. 

🐺 What about you 🐙?

🦈 Something surprising, like a hoodie?

🐬 No, 🐙 might wear something like Jade’s pajamas.

🐺 I hope he wears a really embarrassing T-shirt.

🦈 Something that says TAMARU in hiragana or something.

🐙 I wear jersey pants and a T-shirt.

🦈 Half right.

🐙 I just wear clothes that I don’t want to wear outside and go to sleep.

🐺 My pajamas are like Jade’s.

🐬 What color?

🦈 Pink?

🐺 Not pink. 

🐙 Checkered pattern?

🐺 Not checkered pattern. I wear sets of navy and black and brown on rotation.

🦈🐙 How adult.

🐺 This is embarrassing.

🦈 Can we turn that into an SSR 🐺-kun?

🐺 ME!?

🐬 SSR 🐺-kun, that’s good.

About Octavinelle

Impressions of Azul/Jade/Floyd, voicing Azul/Jade/Floyd, Main Story Review

Impressions of Azul

🦈 A cute character you can bully

🐙 I don’t think Azul would agree.

🐬 He probably looks like that from the perspective of other characters but actually he puts in effort and does what needs to be done. 

🐙 He wants to be perfect, and his passion for that is amazing, there is a lot about him that can be teased. That is one of the things that is likable about him. Azul himself probably doesn’t think so at all. 

Impressions of Jade

🐙 Jade might be the one who is most difficult to read of the three. The most mysterious.

🦈 I thought he was the most normal one, at first.

🐬 He behaves elegantly. But the words he uses and his atmosphere are…unique.

🦈 When he laughs…the Leech siblings, they have jagged teeth. Jade doesn’t laugh much, at first. But in one moment he will smile and show his teeth.

Impressions of Floyd

🐙 When he is having fun he becomes excited, and when he isn’t his mood crashes. And that is easy to understand about him. 

🦈 He might be the easiest to understand.

🐙 But we don’t know the catalysts. And that is an unreadable point about him—he has that mysteriousness.

🦈 He loves strong people. He gets excited interacting with them.

🐬 The reason Floyd is able to do whatever he wants is because of Azul and Jade.

🦈 Jade acts like he is restraining him but he doesn’t.

🐬 He enjoys it.

🦈 He will say “I’ll hold him back” and then releases him and says “go have fun.” It’s a little tough for Azul, though.

🐙 Azul gets annoyed a bit. 

🐬 Azul comes close to saying “I won’t allow this anymore!” but we know just how to soothe him again before he reaches his breaking point.

🐙 He’s kind of being played with in that way.

🐬 He’s being played with.

Voicing Azul

🐙 Recently I have to be more careful not to overdo it. Azul uses strong vocal inflections, but when I start enjoying it too much those inflections become even stronger and they have to tell me to calm down. I have to say “I’m sorry, I was having too much fun.”

🐺 Has your idea of Azul changed?

🐙 It’s evolved. In Book 3 there were serious scenes? Normal scenes without jokes for the story, and I portrayed him as a serious-minded character, but as the story progresses the jokes are increasing. Especially Book 7.

🦈 Book 7 is fun!

🐙 When they let me read the script I was like, “what?”

🐬 I didn’t really understand what was going on, at first.

🦈 ”Am I reading this right!?” was my response.

🐙 When we receive the script it is just set, so I would wonder what the illustrations would be like. 

Voicing Jade

🐬 Elegance. His vocabulary is very distinctive, and there will be sudden eeriness that makes you wonder “What did he just say?” He needs to be misleadingly portrayed as a gentleman. He is interesting because just when you think “This is what Jade is like,” something unexpected will arise. Even in normal conversations I have to navigate very carefully to include intentionally unsettling elements without going too far, which would compromise his core personality. Elegance is key. The difficult thing about Azul and Jade is that they are both elegant. They’re both gentlemen. The way they deceive others with “we’re good people, we’re gentleman” is very similar, so in the beginning—it was right after 🐙 had settled on his portrayal of Azul--the team and I did a deep analysis into the way Jade should speak and the atmosphere he should create. There was the risk of overlapping with Azul, so we talked about giving him a higher or lower voice, and various things, and through a lot of trial and error we settled on how to differentiate them. The beginning was rough. We were worried that he sounded too much like Azul, so I would listen to the recordings of Azul’s lines to better understand.

🐺 But your impression of Jade hasn’t changed?

🐬 No, but progressing through the story Azul has changed a lot, and Jade has had a lot of humorous instances, and I’m not worried anymore, but the dash at the start—we were worried that the image of the dorm would be set by that, since it was still the very beginning, and I felt that weight. 

Voicing Floyd

🦈 He has a playful spirit, but it was a question of exactly how much of that can be put into the performance—I thought it would be good to voice him as if his mood changes are like a roller coaster, and that’s what I did, but…my first recording I did together with 🐙. And they really let me do whatever I wanted. Coming in from what angles, sweetening the tone, there are parts where he gets a scary look so then I would put in more strength at the end of a line, or instead end gentle—there was a lot. But I probably overdid it. The opposite direction of Jade and Azul. The staff cautioned me, saying that balance is important. 🐙 and I recorded the first to third Books together, and I was recording Book 4 alone, and there is a part where his voice becomes very low. A different VA did that part. But I got the idea that Floyd actually wants to have a deeper voice. There was a lot of variation in Book 4 but from Book 5 I have been looking more at balance.

🐙 It is actually more difficult because you have so much freedom.

🦈 I’ll overdo it. I can’t overdo it or speak too sweetly. Can’t speak with too much familiarity. Have to see how much I can do while keeping it within the scope of his playful spirit. Also, we’re eels. We’re kind of scary in the ocean. So I would do things like adding a sense of intimidation or pressure at the ends of sentences. And all of that came apart in Book 7. (removed for spoiler) That was all balance too, though. They would tell me I was overdoing it. It’s only 70% (redacted)-Floyd.

🐙 I wanted to hear 100%.

🦈 They let me match my performance to the illustration. But, yeah…

🐙 That face, after all…

🦈 Exactly, this face…I wondered if I could go full comical…

🐬 That was rude, right?

🦈 Jade is so rude.

🐬 He is looking closer than anyone, too.

🦈 Even now I can’t forget it. “Floyd…(redacted)…?” There!? That’s what you notice!?

Main Story Review

🐺 provides an outline of Book 3.

🐙 They turned the contracts to sand. Unbelievable.

🐬 They made Azul overblot.

🐺 provides outlines of Book 4 and Book 6 (they maybe spent too much time in the last part so this is all very quick)

🐙 talks about Riddle and Azul’s scene in Book 6.

They all discuss the difficulty of recording Book 7, as things become more comical. 🐬 talks about how he struggled with certain laughter that Jade had never done before that he did for the first time in 7, but he didn’t require any retakes. 

(Lots of Book 7 talk, removed for spoilers 💦)

🐺 December 18th is my birthday.

🐙 SSR 🐺

🦈 Send me a picture.

🐙 We’ll add filters for you.

🐬 In the morning it will be “Platinum Jacket.”

🐺 I have to prepare!

🐬 At night it will be Relaxing MyRoom.

🐺 Maybe I didn’t need to tell you that.

🦈 says that he and 🐬 have never recorded together. They haven’t even seen each other since Twst Fes.

They all talk about how much they want to be able to get together and talk again, saying they’ll happily take any opportunity.

They talk about what they want to do for New Years. 🦈 says “eat 100 mochi”, 🐬says “go diving” and 🐙 says “go to an onsen.”

🐬You are a capybara to the very end!

[maniculum]

Bestiaryposting Results: Dulyamra

Odd one this week, and an entry that is... moderately identifiable? but also confusingly hostile. So let's just get into it. Anyone who's not sure what this post is can see https://maniculum.tumblr.com/bestiaryposting for an explanation and previous entries in this series.

The bestiary entry that people were working from can be found here:

And if you want to join in and draw some kind of Creature for the next one, the entry people are working from currently can be found here:

Art below the cut.

@ectocs (link to post here) was the first to post this week -- and this is their first time contributing to this! Welcome! We've got a bear-like critter here, and the weird puffy face is not unlike a mandrill, which makes sense. I think the threatening facial expression on this one is done well -- as are the clearly worried expressions on the juveniles. There's some interesting material explaining design decisions and a couple sketches in the linked post, which I recommend y'all go check out.

@silverhart-makes-art (link to post here) joined... most of us, actually... in being very puzzled by the bestiary's insistence that this is a Foul Beast. We get a sloth-inspired critter here, because famously sloths have a whole algae ecosystem in their fur, and some closed-minded folks may consider this foul. There's additional explanation in the linked post, including the note that Silverhart has given this creature anteater-style coloration because anteaters are related to sloths -- which I did not know previously, but now that I think about it, does make sense.

@pomrania (link to post here) decided that this creature should be a cynocephalus, but one with a red butt like a baboon to support the author's assertion that the rear is "disgusting and horrid". Honestly that makes a lot of sense with the entry, and it's always good to see cynocephali get more attention. Good direction to go. However, that butt is also unsettling for me, so I'm scrolling down to the next one now.

@sweetlyfez (link to post here) made the observation that a brachycephalic dog -- such as a pug -- has a creased face that many would consider hideous (or at least unethical) and ran with it. I like this interpretation a lot, and I really appreciate the coloration of the night-time scene here.

@cheapsweets (link to post here) really went hard on designing a creature that could be described as foul and hideous -- successfully, I think, because I don't think I'd want to be around this thing. The head close-up is, I think, a well-executed design for a rather frightening creature; and, of course, the overall beast here is something CheapSweets themself describes as "a semi-naked bear with a fat butt," which I think is something I'd rather keep my distance from. (Also, thank you for including alt text.)

@coolest-capybara (link to post here) took this in an interesting direction. (I always enjoy it when someone decides to make one of these an invertebrate, because it usually takes some creativity to justify it.) Anyway, here we have a hermit crab, which of course has arms in the form of claws, and can conveniently hide its "disgusting and horrid" rear end in a shell. As usual, the stylization is delightful -- I like the humanoid eyes on the crab and just everything going on with the moon.

On to the Aberdeen Bestiary.

Yeah, this is pretty evidently some sort of ape. I'm not sure which one, but the bestiary author isn't either -- it just says "ape".

I don't know exactly what the medievals had against apes; in the most recent episode of the podcast, we heard a medieval fable where someone referred to them as "abominable" as though that was settled fact. I'd say it's a lack of familiarity, but also those are pretty solid illustrations of apes, so clearly they had some idea what they looked like. (One of our illustrators this week noted that they find some primates a bit uncanny-valley, so maybe that's it -- apes are just too close to human without being human, and that makes some people uncomfortable.)

Anyway, we've got some neat sequential art here. Here is a hunter with a spear. Here is an ape at rest. Here is the ape getting up and escaping from the hunter. That's cool.

I don't really have anything else to add here. Apes.

EDIT:

Thought of something to end with.

... no, that's nothing. Still leaving it there.

[arthurtaylorlester]

wtnv liveblog ep. 224 liminal spaces

quod est superius est sicut quod inferius

well yeah cecil night vale could be a liminal space

i cannot with cecil talking about trends skfhkhkg

yes you are very hip cecil :D

dw cecil i love popcorn too wait am i old???

mmmmm night jeans

reminds me of the one bo burnham jeans ad

amusement park you say

cecil is soo good at describing liminal spaces

you know what you ARE right they are juts spooky

OH GOD A MAN??

you can’t remember him huh

it’s his father

HOLY SHIT IT ACTUALLY IS EMPTNESS IN YOUR HEART YOU SAY

noooo dana dont go after D:<

exactly why would you ever want to leave

TRASH THAT PUG !!

michelle and riverdale meditation sounds amazing

did you know i actually can’t boil water nevermind food i could actually use that

wait janice fell asleep?? this is exactly like ‘it doesnt hold up’

oh ok that is very true liminal spaces are very nostalgic and thrive on it

THE MAN AGAIN I KNEW IT

a video?? what’s he typing

wha-

YEAH WELL CECIL I WANT TO SEE HIS FACE

no you haven’t seen enough

cecil baldwin is so good at voice acting, you can hear the fear when he says the video isnt turning off and that he’s bad at using technology

CAPYBARA = DOG TRUTHING

CECIL YOU ARE SO TRUE FOR THAT THE DISHES IN FACT DON’T MATTER

cecil you are in a horror show you will die

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE NOT IN THE STUDIO

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE IN 2003

god i love horror shows

WEATHER TIME: SPOILER ALERT IT SLAPS

wait is he in the fucking backrooms

HE IS IN VARIOUS BACKROOM LEVELS

of what now?? malaise??

oh no do we meet cecil’s dad

if he isnt lee marvin i’ll cry

his home? oh no

hhhhh ohhh noo

CAT BALOO?? THE MURALS TOO ?? I WAS RIGHT

cecil bbg please don’t repress bad memories :((

noooo cecil :(( i wish i could help my blorbos ugh

well, i certainly loved this episode, liminal spaces are such interesting concept

goodnight nightvale, gnight :)

[animationreview]

Season 3, Episode 4: Mutiny on the Windbreaker.

Premise: Captain Flarty tries one of Bob's burgers and loves it. So much that he invites him to cook onboard the Windbreaker cruise ship. Which Bob declines. The captain can't have that, so invites him aboard for one night. Except it isn't for one night because the cruise ship is now out at sea. Linda and the kids decided to enjoy their vacay while Bob stresses. Things are not as they seem aboard the windbreaker as Bob plays a cat and mouse game against the captain.

My Thoughts: I like that this episode is set in a new location, the Windbreaker. I also love Captain Flarty and how all his staff behave around him. Louise's claws scare me, she has too much power.

Pros: Louise stealing the captain's pet Capybara to cause a distraction is wonderful.

Cons: I find Gene's crush on the puppet to be awkward and just slightly hard to watch, the second hand embarrassment. Some people suffer from food poisoning, and it isn't pretty.

My Favourite Line: We planned on handing them out, but then it was noon, and then there was a bug that landed on the ground, and anyway, the day just got away from us.

(A very true sentiment.)

My Rating: 8.5/10.

[awilddakota]

A Check Up!

So, as the 17th episode of Resident Evil 7 comes out tomorrow I just want to say that I appreciate the collective amount of support the series has been getting since the release of the first episode. I remember the last five or four episodes being my favorite to go back too in the editing phase and whatnot. They will bring about the very first let's play series that completed. Which took about since 2021 to do but, we finally gonna get there.

I also want to make sure I thank both @plubos and @oli-capybara for being such cool friends who before the series even started, during, and after its end, recording wise for being able to allow themselves, me and other friends to be well, themselves. It's seeming like a post like this should be written after the series has finished but, it remains that everything stated previously just continues and there is always a right time to show appreciation for something or/and anyone. I also want to thank the people who just like what I do for sticking with me. That's pretty fucking cool if you ask me. Have a good rest of your day, night, evening, or whenever you get to read this.

[narilily]

That was that, then. Should Nari ever find herself in a situation where she needed someone to shoot a random fact her way -- about capybaras or anything, to be honest -- she knew who she was going to call. "We could kick some serious ass if the trivia questions were limited to plants, animals and fashion only," everything else might be a little hard for them to figure out, but if they had something to work on, that would count! "Remember the Millionaire show? The one where they had lifelines? If I ever end up on that show…" she paused, screwing up her face, "well, if it's still around, but if I end up on that show, and get a question about creatures I don't know anything about, just expect a call from me. Don't worry, I'll return the favor if you ever find yourself in a similar predicament."

Letting out a playful groan when Deacon relented to being her blueberry princess, she swayed back and forth where she was sitting, "don't say that, because now I've got this vision of you in a pale blue dress, dancing around with a basket of blueberries. And I've got the fabric to make it happen," it came out a bit like a threat, even if she was kidding, but if anyone could pull off the look, it probably honestly was Deacon. He was a good looking dude who had a free spirit, and clearly wasn't the kind of person that was going to back down from a challenge, either.

"… I'm painfully uneducated when it comes to Spongebob, but now I feel like I need to go home and find that episode," and probably fall right down the rabbit hole of watching a show that was going to make her feel brainless, but… it wasn't as though that was really all that bad of an idea, either. "Can you imagine living in a world where people just… genuinely didn't care?" she asked, shrugging both shoulders, "what size you are, what you do with your body hair, what clothes you wear, how you do your hair, what you eat? We would all be happier and solve so many other problems that we have in the world if we were just happy and let other people be happy, too."

"Do you have favorite chickens, then?" she asked, when he admits to not remembering all of their names, or at the very least, not being able to remember which is which, "like is there one particular chicken that you'll never, ever forget the name of?" Nari went with flower names for her chickens, the same way that she had or Cosmo and Magnolia, but that only seemed fitting. "Oh my God, wait -- do they have people names? I love when people name their pets people names! Like having a dog named Frank or a goldfish named Nicole. And you're just sitting there going on and on about Jessica and how you hung out with her last night and told her about how important her eggs are to you… imagine someone overhearing that and thinking you meant, like, a girlfriend or some random friend of yours?" Nari's grin was wide and mischievous at the thought, unable to help her amusement. "They invented showers, you know -- to get rid of cooties."

HER ENTHUSIASM IS INFECTIOUS, even while they're ironically trying to figure out what he's supposed to be passionate about. and it's like she's having a personal breakthrough when she suggests that he can be a trivia master, and he's unable to hide the smile that this idea provokes. "i mean, if you wanna form a team for trivia night at the mirage, i'm down. who knows, capybaras could be the 500-dollar winning ticket." he knows quite a bit about rodents in general, so he's pretty confident he could get them a win.

he tears another piece from the cookie and lifts his shoulders when nari nudges him, sheepishly ducking his head at the brief contact. "ah, what the hell. i might even rock the whole cottagecore look. could even put blueberries in there. really stay on brand, you know? fuck it, i'll be your blueberry princess, i don't care." he'll probably just end up handing it over to his sisters as a 'gift' but it could be fun to try something new. it's not like he has anything better to do these days, anyway. well, besides looking after his brother's business, but who says he can't multitask?

he finishes the rest of the cookie and tries not to keep looking at the rest of the bag, tells himself that's the last he'll let himself have. "amen to that, sister," he says with a hand over his head like he's receiving blessing when nari brings up letting people do what they want with their bodies. "people should learn to mind their own business more. and anyway, perfect's overrated. you ever seen that spongebob episode where he tries to get rid of all his ridges? it's fuckin' weird. ridges are awesome. body hair is great."

he nods, listening to nari tell him about her cats. though he's really more of a dog person, he appreciates how she speaks about her pets with so much love and adoration, you'd think she was talking about her own children. which, deacon thinks, is pretty much the same thing these days. what was it people called them, fur-parents? the chickens, though, at least that's something they have in common. "i named our chickens. i actually can't remember which one's which most of the time, but it's nice to call them by some name, or i'd feel bad for makin' them lay eggs for my benefit. least i can do is call her jessica rather than just chicken, you know what i mean?" he grins when she makes a show out of being repulsed by his cooties and crinkles his nose, dropping his head dramatically. "i know, i've been livin' in shame for far too long..."

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

All of Maz’s sidekick identities, ranked

I needed an excuse to rewatch SheZow (you guys remember SheZow? The “No, we have Danny Phantom at home” of cartoons?), so this is what I’m doing today. SheZow’s best character

Uuuuh second best character

A Character

and the various sidekick personae he cycles through in the attempt to find the perfect one to support his superhero best friend. JUST LIKE A BEST FRIEND SHOULD.

Ep 2: Meteor/Meatier Man

Not well thought out in a city with so many off-leash dogs, but he is impressively competent with those sausage string nunchucks. 8/10.

Ep 3: Dan-o-flage

Reeeally reaching for that pun. Even the characters in the show are unimpressed. Name’s not even Dan. Camo is uninspired, but gets leeway for having very little warning of the bank robbery and essentially having to ad-lib this. 4/10.

Ep 4: Shaverine

SHAVERINE. 10/10.

Ep 5: The Grip

Ready supply of duct tape (always useful), and those clamps do hurt so he has offensive capabilities. Unfortunately it’s hard to look like a threat when your costume is “guy stupid enough to duct tape his own hair”. 6/10.

Ep 6: The MAN(icurist)

Given Guy’s complicated relationship to his own masculinity as a stereotypically masculine guy forced into the role of a stereotypically feminine superhero, social support is important. Also Guy’s lack of nail care spawns a major series villain in this episode, so Maz was on the right track here. 9/10.

Also ep 6: Whatever This Thing Is.

Didn’t catch the name of this one. Don’t want to. 1/10.

Ep 8: Major Flouride

The costume’s not as impressive as some, but Major Flouride is a lot more proactive than most of Maz’s costumes. Also gives us the Totally Correct Fact that flouride comes from Florida. 8/10

Ep 10: Time Travel Boy

Not even trying for a pun, Maz? It’s a time travel episode. Bring your A game. 1/10

Ep 11: The Prisonerrrrrd

He was imprisoned at the time, so outfit options were limited. Also, busted everyone out in this outfit, so extra points for usefulness. Stupid name though, and a sidekick essentially calling themselves “Designated Hostage” is just setting themselves up for failure. 5/10

Ep 13: Corduroy Boy

Now THIS is fuckin’ STYLE. 10/10.

Ep 14: Splatter Lad

Inventive. 9/10

Ep 17: Nick of Time

At least he has head protection. 5/10

Ep 20: Cupid

Presumably I don’t need to explain this obvious 10/10.

Ep 21: Ridi-cules

Bonus points for theming with Kelly’s far superior Her-cules costume. 8/10.

23: The Utensil

You’re literally calling yourself a tool, man. Get it together. 4/10.

Ep 24: Grease Monkey

You had so much you could do with a car-themed sidekick called the Grease Monkey, and this is what you chose to do with it. You’re better than this, Maz. 2/10.

Ep 25: The Food Court Jester

This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen. 9/10.

Ep 26: Bizarra Capybara

Excellent choice of rodent, horrifying costume. This is some Five Nights at Freddies shit. 3/10.

Ep 28: Chick-Pea

It looks silly, but this costume got him adopted by a giant mutant pigeon social activist, an act that later saved them. Can’t argue with results. 9/10.

Ep 33: Spinodactoraptorsaurus

Not much to say about this one. 5/10.

Ep 37: McMaz

Just what this show was missing: Dr Seuss. 6/10

Ep 39: Pop Star

I can’t even tell what this outfit is made of, but it looks more practically constructed than some. 7/10

Ep 42: The Lawn Ranger

Good, he’s putting in effort again. 8/10

Ep 43: Helium Head

Living every child’s dream. 7/10

Ep 44: Wolf Bone

Why couldn’t Spinodactoraptorsaurus put in this kind of effort? 8/10

Ep 46: Freezer Pop’n’Lock

This is your normal incognito outfit with a winter jacket. This isn’t worthy of a persona name. 1/10

Ep 50: Super Duper Sticker Dude

I think the writers just stopped trying at this point. 1/10

Ep 51: Lost and Found Boy

Probably the best use that most lost and found objects will ever see. Impeccable style. 9/10.

Ep 52: Beardamus

Eh. Weak closer for a final episode, but fun name. 6/10.

And now, The Big Question. Not “which is the BEST SheZow sidekick outfit?”, because the tie between Shaverine and Cupid will never be broken. The big question is, “was making this really worth so many hours of my time? Was it worth rewatching about 9 hours of a charmingly mediocre, if dated, superhero cartoon for this?”

Yes. Yes it was.

[adifferentisaac]

some thoughts // some media (01)

when i had originally started writing this post homer radio episode 4 had just released (10PM). by the time i’ve restarted this post it’s now 5:12AM. i spent the last 6ish hours diarizing emotions as best i could and romanticizing the various things i was able to focus my attention on over the course of the night. i don’t really know what happened nor do i have the mental capacity to explain how the original post was lost but it was. a good place to start would be what this is. i guess posts like this are a bit like diary entries. ideas and thoughts that i have. feelings and emotions i feel. to me it’s a little more introspective than it sounds as my fingers click these words into existence through my iphone keyboard. i’m high as shit.

homer radio is fun. these caught my attention.

in the episode there’s a heavenly transition between a dialogue with gravity and give you the world. i think the same sample is used for ye’s life of the party (I THINK)

at this point is it even worth introducing myself

i’m isaac i’m blogging again i’m 24 allie brosh, theRadBrad and frank ocean are the blueprint i stream i’m everywhere just like the air u kno that’s why i luh tomorrow iykyk baby idk what to tell you im probably as close as you can get to gym rat without being gym bro. i hope.

it was around here in the original post that i’d been monologuing about mental illnesses & health, trauma and depression but i’m way higher now and a lot lot less willing to go over everything again but i hit my brother on the signal around the same time and the message reads pretty similarly albeit much shorter

one day at a time

twitter was hot earlier in the night i don’t know if they still are that website is upon calamity apparently that hoe boutta get shut down i was getting cooked for not knowing that anteaters were real animals i’m not sure where i would’ve seen one be fr? disovered capybaras earlier this year in much the same fashion.

this interaction stuck out to me

also seagull management i think this phrase is really funny i got a good laugh out of it

not twitter but the rabbit shaking his head and frowning at the ferret got me bad. idk why the shit was so funny but it brought me joy

anyways

i should’ve streamed tonight. i was tired after the gym. i feel bad for not making the effort. frustrated.

that new call of duty game is cool by the way. it pisses me off really bad and i’m not very good at it but it has moments. the frenetic style of gameplay is engaging.

since i started typing this like an hour has gone by i need to be asleep so i’m gonna wrap this up

i have feelings and thoughts and they’re in my head and really i don’t have anyone to share them with in such an intimate way as this so i figured why not share it to my little audience of none or everyone depending on how you look at that sort of thing.

flowers for u babe xoxo

-Isaac

ps.

[calciferstims]

lmaoo got real clever with the emojis there!

no worries! take your time answering, not like im being any quicker myself lol.

the only pirate theme thing im sort of watching on and off that has me sort of interested is one piece. lmfao yep animooo! i legit dont really watch anything else but anime aha. go watch it you too! it only has over 1k+ episodes and counting lool.

LOL...3 TIMES as long? damn. what the hell was going on? give the masses the fucking deets or something. 😅 "I have no idea what con o’neill was doing but I know what he’s capable of" pff LMAO 😂 what if that was what he kept doing? just going awkwardly as long as he could ooooo daddyyyyy and he just couldnt help himself? OOOOO...PAAAAAAAADREEEEE. shiver ma timbers!

AHA WHAT??? was NOT what i had thought it was going to be, okay okay i legit thought it was going to be..uh...sexier? lmfao its just what i had in mind. when he was done he legit looked like he came to his senses loll.

israels whole wiki is a tad bit...weird. it's not really able to state time of death or location either, which may be understandable? its kinda funny how izzy is portrayed as a 55 year old when apparently israel was like....in his 20's or something. lol...

i wish there was a capybara emoji tbh! now that'd be litty titty.

honestly i was kind of waiting for you to maybe realise that "hol up...is this the same person?" and then boom, ye did haha.

hope ye having a good day too and have enjoyed your weekend!

sorry dumb as all hell but what do you mean with him holding back?

~🐨

ok I hi I took ten years again sorry 😔 imma start putting the rest under the cut bc I don’t wanna shove my long ass replies on everyone’s dash all the time 😅

ohhh one piece???? Ok but like. It feels funny to me that I have definitely heard that name many times and yet somehow still have ZERO clue what it’s actually about. Like actually none. Net zero information. You could literally give me any random, made-up plot of the show and I would be like ‘yeah sure that checks out’. I would have no way of knowing otherwise 😂

AND YEAH EXACTLY. I WANNA KNOW WHAT TF HE WAS DOING. PLEASE RELEASE THE FORBIDDEN TAKES LMAOODHF

ok so you saying ‘ooohh padre’ is SO cursed but it just reminded me of something even fucking worse I found recently 😔😔 I actually thought ‘oh I NEED to show 🐨 anon this IMMEDIATELY’ SHDGHHF. It’s a fucking. The f. The French dub. Of that scene. It’s so fucking bad. It makes the original scene feel like a pleasant dream with how embarrassing the French version is by comparison. I found it at like 3am at night and had a breakdown. please share my pain.

LIKE WHY DOES HE FUCKING SOUND LIKE THAT. WHY. I HATE IT SO MUCH PLEASE SHDHH IT TOOK ME SEVERAL TRIES TO MUSTER THE STRENGTH TO VIEW THE WHOLE THING I KEPT PAUSING IT LMAOO

and on that note DGDGH PLS. NO IT IS NOT SEXY. not one bit it is thee most embarrassing scene ever. he’s a humiliating little man. I love him. He’s so dumb.

and yeah that’s very much what I’m talking about when I say I wish we knew more about him!!! Like…. Israel Hands was rlly walkin around being a PIRATE at my age????? Like I’m pretty sure Blackbeard gave him his own ship when he was like, 17, which is just wild to me. Who was he…. I must know….

damn we do need a capybara emoji ur so right…. Somebody get on that 😤

and to answer your question!! I just… I know con o’neill and I feel like he could do something much worse than the daddy scene if he wanted to 😂😂 he has so much weird horny freak power contained within him…… you don’t even know…

Honestly I WANT him to do something worse in season 2. I want him to outdo himself. I think he’s capable of it 😌

[inspectorspacetimerevisited]

Some say that episodes like ‘Night of the Capybaras’

are actually funny whilst one is high on some intoxicant.

[insanityclause]

In celebration of Earth Day 2021, Apple TV+ will debut “The Year Earth Changed,” an original documentary special narrated by Emmy and BAFTA Award-winning broadcaster David Attenborough, along with the second seasons of documentary series “Tiny World” and “Earth At Night In Color.” Set to premiere globally in more than 100 countries on April 16, 2021, each of these groundbreaking originals will captivate and inspire viewers to herald Earth Day, the world’s largest annual environmental movement.

“During this most difficult year, many people have reappraised the value and beauty of the natural world and taken great comfort from it,” said Attenborough. “But the lockdown also created a unique experiment that has thrown light on the impact we have on the natural world. The stories of how wildlife responded have shown that making even small changes to what we do can make a big difference.”

Showcasing exclusive footage from around the world after an unprecedented year, “The Year Earth Changed” is a timely documentary special that takes a fresh new approach to the global lockdown and the uplifting stories that have come out of it. From hearing birdsong in deserted cities, to witnessing whales communicating in new ways, to encountering capybaras in South American suburbs, people all over the world have had the chance to engage with nature like never before. In the one-hour special, viewers will witness how changes in human behaviour — reducing cruise ship traffic, closing beaches a few days a year, identifying more harmonious ways for humans and wildlife to coexist — can have a profound impact on nature. The documentary, narrated by David Attenborough, is a love letter to planet Earth, highlighting the ways nature bouncing back can give us hope for the future. “The Year Earth Changed” is produced by BBC Studios Natural History Unit, directed by Tom Beard, and executive produced by Mike Gunton and Alice Keens-Soper.

Returning for season two, “Tiny World,” narrated and executive produced by Paul Rudd (“Ant-Man”), grants viewers a unique perspective into the natural world, illuminating the ingenuity and resilience of the planet’s smallest creatures. With over 200 species filmed and 3,160 hours of footage, the six-episode docuseries shares surprising stories and spectacular cinematography that spotlight small creatures and the extraordinary things they do to survive. Captured on film for the first time are anemone shrimp, which clap to signal their intent as cleaners of predatory fish; the “biting” behaviour of fang blenny fish, filmed in slow-motion with unprecedented use of phantom high-speed cameras; and Etruscan shrews, known to be the hungriest mammals on earth. “Tiny World” is produced by Plimsoll Productions and is executive produced by Tom Hugh Jones, who also serves as writer with David Fowler. Grant Mansfield and Martha Holmes also serve as executive producers on behalf of Plimsoll Productions.

The groundbreaking original series “Earth At Night In Color” also returns for a second season with six all-new episodes narrated by Tom Hiddleston (“Avengers”). With the use of cutting-edge cameras and a revolutionary post-production process, “Earth At Night In Color” presents nature’s nocturnal wonders with striking new clarity. Some never-before-seen behaviours of animals after dark, captured using low-light cameras and light from a full moon, include elephants battling hyenas around starlit waterholes and kangaroos embracing under the cover of darkness to find a mate. Other animals in the new season include pumas, polar bears, manta rays, and tiny planktonic life at night in the ocean. “Earth At Night In Color” is produced by Offspring Films. The series is executive produced by Alex Williamson and series produced by Sam Hodgson.

“Tiny World” and “Earth At Night In Color” will be featured in a special Earth Day room on Apple TV+, showcasing a curated collection of content that embraces the theme of preserving the planet. Also included are the Cinema for Peace International Green Film Award-winning movie “The Elephant Queen” and “Here We Are: Notes for Living on Planet Earth,” which debuted last year on the 50th anniversary of Earth Day. The animated short film, based on the best-selling children’s book by Oliver Jeffers, is narrated by Meryl Streep. Jacob Tremblay stars as a precocious 7-year-old who, on the eve of Earth Day, learns about the wonders of the planet from his parents (Chris O’Dowd, Ruth Negga) and a mysterious exhibit at the aptly named Museum of Everything.

[zmwrites]

Tag: About Me Game Dump

I am combining a few small tag games into one post.

I was tagged by @akindofmagictoo and @stuffaboutwriting in the following game:

Rules: list five things about yourself you want your followers to know. they can be as simple as your age or as complex as your deepest fear, as long as it’s something you’re comfortable with sharing. when you’re done, tag 10 people you want to get to know better.

during non-pandemic times, i give historical ghost tours for money

i am aggressively passionate about hockey

i watch forensic files every night even though i’ve seen most of the episodes because i like to learn about forensics but am too afraid to go back to school to study it

the last impulsive thing i did was to get three new piercings

i love books but haven’t been able to focus to finish books since i graduated university

I was tagged by @avakrahn and @akindofmagictoo for this game:

Rules: post 3 random facts about yourself (or your book/oc) and send it to the last 7 blogs in your notifications.

i am afraid of mascots and rollercoasters, making the disney parks extremely unappealing to me

i follow twitter accounts solely dedicated to photos of capybaras, quokkas, alligators, dik-diks, dogs, cats, wolves, and other animals

i can’t eat bananas or udon noodles bc of their textures

From @drippingmoon:

Rules: write 5 things that make you happy and tag the last 10 people in your notifications!

goldfish crackers

forensic files

dogs!!! esp my dog, Mia

freshly baked chocolate chip cookies

comfy blankets

And one final game from @akindofmagictoo​:

Rules: type your username with your eyes closed.

zmlorenz

this was possibly too easy for me.....since it my name and i type it a lot

I’m not gonna tag anyone for these, but if anyone wants to pick and choose, please feel free to say I tagged you in any or all of these games!

[woulddieforperrytheplatypus]

It might be weird bringing an OC into a real episode, but bear with me: it's odd that Perry, aka OWCA's most antisocial agent, is the one who's forced to lead a team of newbies he barely has patience for, but if Coby the Capybara were canon, he'd be perfect to train them given his personality. Perry only steps in out of jealousy when he sees how well Coby and Heinz get along, but says he only wants to keep Coby's mischief under wraps, and Coby is more than happy to give Perry the role of leader.

wait a second, that’s a really cool idea 👀

Not gonna lie, I’m kinda living for the fact that Perry gets jealous because Coby gets to hang out with Heinz. Like, that’s a pretty big leadership role, and even though Perry wouldn’t want to do it, I have to imagine he’d be kinda bitter if it wasn’t offered to him first, especially because it’s his nemesis and Monogram already knows that Heinz can wreak a lot of havoc from the inside thanks to Agent Doof -- which actually makes me wonder if maybe Perry was offered the job first and he passed it up because he knew Coby would have more patience with the trainees and he figured he’d be happier taking on actual cases.

I wonder when Perry would realize it was a role he did want. Would it be when Coby started talking about Heinz at him like they were best friends? Or when Heinz started talking about Coby on their bowling nights? Or when Coby would ditch for a few hours every week for a mini party with his team? Or would he be able to put up with it until Heinz says he can’t hang out with Perry because he already has plans with Coby (and possibly the rest of the gang)?

I feel like it’s really plausible though, because Coby would absolutely love to annoy his buddy at work and Monogram wouldn’t turn down the chance to a) have the best agent train the newbies and b) have Perry keep an eye on Heinz. I think the problems would come in when both Perry and Coby decide they really like Heinz, because Perry would think he gets to lay claim on him because they have a shared history and Coby would think he gets to lay claim on him because he was the one assigned to this job (and poor Heinz would probably be oblivious to all the in-fighting because he gets to hang out with Perry the Platypus all day again and what more could he ask for?)

[queensparklekitten]

(Magnus 25) ok, Natalie unscrewing the lightbulbs and singing all night is weird, but whatever's shuffling around in her room at night when she's out of the house... I suppose it would be too much to hope that it's just a cat or a dog or a capybara, wouldn't it. I'd say "it's just a normal pet" is even less likely at this point than, for example, "it's the thing that was in the coffin in episode 2"

vibing time *unscrews lightbulbs and sings all night* 

[majingojira]

Jurassic Park - Expanded With Modern Knowledge

I’ve posted a few times now on how to redo Jurassic Park/Jurassic World in terms of Fauna Diversity and other factors.  So you can say with this post I’m “Back on my Bullshit.” 

Let’s dive right in, shall we?  We’ll see some repeats, but others not so much. We’ll go about it via different exhibits: The Primary Tour, The Aviary, the Aquarium, The “Fossil Zoo”, The Feeder Animals, and the WIlds. 

 The Wilds

There are indeed wild animals in Jurassic Park.  In the book, part of the whole thing as the re-creation of an extinct ecosystem.  The island Isla Nublar is based on, Cocos Island, is extremely isolated and secluded.  Outside of feral animals ( pigs, deer, goats, cats, and rats), there is very little land life.  Arthropods (Primarily ants, butterflies, millipedes, centipedes, spiders, and isopods) and 2 species of lizards - an Anole and a Gecko.  That’s about it.  Other sources say there are other reptiles on the island, but I have yet to find any details beyond that. 

Though there are a LOT of birds.  90 species, mostly seabirds using it or the offshore rocks as breeding sites.  Endemic birds include a Cuckoo (The Cocos Cuckoo, which is a glorious name a had to share), a finch, and a flycatcher.  Most other birds are found elsewhere inland or offshore. 

The books add 4 animals to the wilds: frogs, leeches, large tarantulas, and opossum. It acknowledges feral rats, but little else.  I’d include them, easily.  Several varieties of Opossum, because they are an archetypical “Ancient” mammal.  The Common and Virginia Opossum, the Water Opossum, and 2 types of Mouse Opossum are all native to Costa Rica and could easily island-hop to Nublar beforehand, or be introduced for a “Night Safari” element. 

Me?  There are 3 birds I’d bring focus to. The Bronzed Cowbird, the Cattle Tyrant, and Yellow-Headed Caracara. All of them follow large animals (or at least, things Capybara sized or bigger) and eat insects disturbed by the larger animals, or that try to feed on the larger animals.  All are native to Costa Rica and its surroundings, so with the influx of large herbivores, they are bound to come over.  Further, smaller herons and egrets would also take advantage of the larger animal movement disturbing prey.  

South America also has its own dung beetles, and I bet a few of them could be called over to all the free food.  Most deal with monkey poo, but I doubt they’d ignore the bounties available.  InGen may bring in their own to handle the elephant-sized spore, but there will be dung beetles. Lots of them. 

Other Costa Rican fauna I’d include as background elements (that could feasibly be on Isla Nublar AND fit the prehistoric aesthetic) include shrews, Central American Agouti, Northern Tamandua,  Nine-Banded Armadillo, Brown-Throated Three-Toed Sloth, Hoffmann’s Two-Toed Sloth, and Central American Dwarf Squirrel.  

But we also know that InGen released animals into the park that were ‘prehistoric’ to make the whole area support the dinosaurs in some way.  This included a (grossly misplaced and oversized) dragonfly/griffinfly. 

So, in a more realistic version, what would they do release into the wilds of Isla Nublar? 

Tinamous.  As I’ve said before, they can easily be in enclosures with larger animals.  They’ve been in their current form for about 10 million years, and they resemble ancestral ground birds (the kind that survived the KT Boundary) extremely well. 

Capybara.  Docile as hell and gets along with everything, as well as attracting the tick-eating birds mentioned above, these animals can chill with the best of them.  Plus the genus dates back 3.6 million years, with the subfamily going back about twice that far.  They are a bit longer than the largest known Mesozoic mammal (Repenomammus (90cm, 13kg)), growing to 1.3m and 68kg.  

The Feeder/Support Animals

In the novel, there are made mention of fish being stocked that the Tyrannosaurs feed on. The Arapaima is about the only fish for that environment (and easily obtainable) that could fit the bill. They also use goats as feeder animals, and in the movie, they use cattle to feed the raptors. 

In my take, the carnivorous animals would primarily be fed with fish and poultry.  Some smaller ones may warrant mice or rats, but fish would work much better overall.  So, Chicken, Turkey, Arapaima, Fathead Minnows, Tilapia, Poecilia, and so on. Given what we currently know about Tyrannosaurs, 6 Turkey a day would be enough to keep it fed (T. rex may need about  40k calories a day to function, and one turkey can provide about 7k calories).  Or 5 Arapaima (fish provide 82 calories per 100 grams, and arapaima can get up to 200kg, even assuming 100kg, that’s 8,200 calories per fish).  

Goats have about 1 calorie per gram, so a goat weighing 40kg (not out of the ordinary as breeds range from 20 to 140kg, but it would be an overall large goat) would meet the dietary needs of a Tyrannosaur.  I’ve already mentioned the cowbirds, but they are pretty important for overall animal health.  Because I’m sure there are ticks since the deer got on the island. 

The Fossil Zoo

Here are “Living Fossils” and things reverse-engineered from existing animals to be more akin to their prehistoric brethren.  As well as their mammalian De-Extinctions.  Because some would be rather easy. 

Some of the ‘wid’ animals would have an example or two in this more “proper’ zoo environment: Capybara, Agouti, Nine-Banded Armadillo, Tamandua, Sloth, Opossums.  

Other mammals of note in this section would be Treeshrews, an Aardvark, Greater Mouse Deer, Black and Rufous Elephant Shrews, A Tapir, Chacoan Peccary, Solenodon, A Giant Anteater, Platypus, Short-Beaked Echidna, and Long Beaked Echidna.  

The Platypus and Long Beaked Echidna may be modified to be larger (2ft long, and 4ft long) to match fossil ancestors.  

It would also be home to 3 de-extinct Mammals.  Quagga, Thylacine, and Gigantopithecus.  The first is easy, the second could get additional funding, the third... Because it’s Cool. 

But with any de-extinction, there come problems.  This is Jurassic Park after all.

Quagga is easy to tame but can be high strung at times.  It does not react well to the smell of predatory dinosaurs. 

Thylacines ... have a very nasty hunting technique of BITING OFF FACES. They aren’t bloodthirsty or anything, even taking turns to feed in an orderly fashion, but their hunting technique is rather mean. 

Gigantopithecus are 3m tall, 500kgs, and STILL able to climb rather well.  it looks like an Orangutang trying to play Gorilla, but with only minimum sexual dimorphism in terms of size (males are still bigger) and it’s working out very well.  Like orangutans, they are natural cage breakers.  They also have very strong jaws and large canines.  They will bite when angered, and if it wants to, it is strong enough to wreck several people in a charge.    

Capybara, Mouse Deer, Tapir, Peccary, Giant Anteater, and the de-extinct trio would have outdoor enclosures, naturally. 

Most of the reptiles would be in the aquatic section, but there are 4 that would be here. 

Tuatara (Modified for tropical environments), the Aldabra Giant Tortoise (possibly grown to “Testudo atlas”/Megalochelys atlas sizes -- almost 7ft across and weighting 4000kg), Quinkana, and Megalania. 

Why? Because Quinkana is a cool crocodilian land predator, and Komodo Dragons are basically island dwarf versions of Megalania.  Quinkana is 6m long (so it’s Q. fortirostrum rather than any of the other species), and Megalania 7m long.  

Once again, we have the unexpected from the de-extinct animals.  

Megalania has two things that were discovered recently in its descendants.  First, it is venomous.  The venom lowers blood pressure in the victim.  So, combined with its horrible bite, the victim will more readily bleed out. The other factor is they retain the Komodo Dragon’s ability to have virgin births.  So, despite being female, they can generate MALE offspring asexually.  

I think, narratively, it would be more fun for this to be the source of the breeding dinosaurs in Jurassic Park.  

Despite being a crocodile, Quinkana is very active and mobile.  It’s also a decent digger.  So it makes a mess of the initial enclosure.  

There are a few birds in the fossil house, both the subject of De-extinction efforts. The Dodo and Upland Moa.  Both have some accessible DNA, and modifying birds' eggs is not too far fetched given what they've already done. 

The last section of the Fossil House can be called the “Carboniferous Swamp” as it’s a re-creation (as best they can do) of that environment.  Here are many amphibians, some with a proper prehistoric pedigree: Greater Siren, Midwife Toad, New Zealand Primitive Frog, Aquatic Caecilians, and Giant Chinese Salamanders.  The latter of which naturally can be up to 6ft long.  JP scientists ensure that they get big with modifications, and have gotten a few 2m monsters loafing around the “Fossil Zoo.”  Basically, as many “Living Fossils” as they can cram together. 

But the real prize here is the insects.  There are a few ‘standard’ ancient insects, and some velvet worms on display.  But the prize is the 4 ‘recreated’ insects.  InGen’s versions of Pulmonoscorpius, Meganeura, Arthropleura, and Manoblatta.  A 70cm scorpion, a Griffon-fly with a 65cm wingspread that was also 70cm long, a millipede 1m long, a 40cm cockroach, and a 1m Centipede.  

Yes, a 1m Centipede.  Narratively, we WANT things to go south, and well, there’s an episode of Lost Tapes which really has fun with giant Centipedes. 

And once again, the Chaos Effect rears its head. Of course, they are breeding despite their best efforts.  But it’s more than that. 

The Pulmonoscorpius they have is derived from an emperor scorpion.  This means it can burrow better than they expected, and while the venom of the base animal is not dangerous, the dosage in their Pulmonoscorpius makes it so.  Paralyzing adults.  In the weak or young, it can lead to coma and death.  Also, it’s more aggressive than the base species.  

The Griffonfly is the most active among them and can use its wingbeats to breathe more effectively.  It spends most of its time growing as a nymph, and a short portion of its life as a flying adult. To hold it, you need a falconer’s glove. 

The Millipede Arthropleura is armored as heck.  Far more than they expected.  And it gnaws like a rodent. 

The Centipede Arthropleura is a monster. It’s fearless and willing to attack people, with venom enough to greatly harm a person (killing the small and weak).  Multiple bites can be fatal.  They also act as carrion eaters.  

And the roach?  It’s an omnivorous scavenger.  If hungry enough, they will gnaw on people who are sleeping near them.   

The Aquarium (and Other Water-Ways)

There’s a lot of aquatic “Prehistoric” animals to draw on without genetic engineering.  Considered “Fluff” by the park, they nevertheless flesh things out. 

There are native fish in the waterways, mostly killifish.  Ingen brings in (and modifies) Bichir, Paddlefish, Sturgeon, Lungfish (South American and Queensland), Gar (Tropical and Alligator Gar), Coelocanth, Bowfin, Arapaima, and Silver Arowana.  Several of these are prized gamefish, so of course, Jurassic Park has a pond to fish for them. 

The aquarium also includes Amphibians: Greater Siren, Midwife Toads, New Zealong Primitive Frogs, Purple Frog, Hula Painted Frog, and another Giant Salamander. 

Aquatic reptiles are where things get more interesting.  There’s are tanks for sea turtles (Olive Ridley’s Sea Turtle), Pig Nosed Turtles, an Alligator Snapping Turtle, and (of course) American Alligators.  

Now we get to the cloned animals.  First, the aquatic crocodile Metriorhynchus. Also, Titanoboa (They call it Gigantophis, but it’s Titanboa).  Nothosaurus, Ichthyosaurus, Plesiosaurus, and Mosasaurus round out the menagerie.  

So, how do they go wrong? 

Well, half of these animals give live birth, so the standard cloning technique didn’t work until they made an artificial womb. Titanoboa is misidentified and almost fully aquatic.  

Metriorhynchus will ‘nibble’ larger prey.  Bite off chunks of something swimming by, darting in and out.  They may or may not kill people this way, but it will maim and ‘disarm’ them.  

Nothosaurus have very dextrous hands, making the seal-reptiles natural cage breakers. They are also great climbers, so they speculate that the animals lived in rocky environments. 

Ichthyosaurs look like dolphins, but they are not.  More skittish than dangerous. 

They thought Plesiosaurus was able to haul itself onto land, but it is not.  

Mosasaurus... It is a mosasaur.  A second roar of jaws to manipulate prey it captures is pretty badass enough. And it can swallow a person whole with little effort. 

Among the dinosaurs, we have the Great Auk, the Original Penguin.  Another recently extinct bird.  Another bird in the Aquarium is the Common Loon, but by comparison, it is a minor addition.

The Great Auk is an exceedingly brave bird.  It will not run readily, preferring to peck and bite when confronted.  Why it’s so brave is not evident, but it is, and won’t take ‘no’ lying down. 

The jewel of the dinosaurs in the aquarium is the Halszkaraptor-- the diving duck raptor. Because, really, how could I not?  This one is weird enough on its own. 

The Aviary

When I first put this together, I made an effort to keep the Pterosaurs small. I’m going to make some exceptions to that for Jurassic Park fun. 

Modern Birds brought into parts of the aviary (because it has parts) are Tinamous, Seriema, California Condor, Magpie Goose, Mousebirds, Bearded Reedling, Broad-Billed Spaayoa, and Hoatzin.

Cloned birds include the Carolina Parakeet and Passenger Pigeon.  These two have large open enclosures because they require a LOT of animals in their group to be comfortable. So already, there are over a hundred of each of these animals. 

Avian Dinosaurs in the park include Archaeopteryx, Microraptor (which they call Tetraptertyx),, and Ambopteryx.  

Archeopteryx is a glider capable of downward flaps, but no upstrokes.  A generalist with the coloration and overall habits of a solitary crow. 

Microraptor is a better flying and climber than Archeopteryx with its four wings and wider grip, it doesn’t seem to mind people and will use them as perches -- which can be dangerous when their claws go in the wrong place. 

Ambopteryx is the largest winged Scansauropteryx.  An omnivore, this bat-winged beasty is just over a foot long and vomits caustic, foul-smelling stomach contents onto attackers when it is angry.  So, really, it’s a “Dragon.”  

Ceredactylus was the main Pterosaur in the Aviary in the book, and I’ll keep them around too. Complete with territorial nature. 

Other Pterosaurs in the Aviary include Pteranodon, Quetzalcoatlus, Sordes, Anurognathus, and Dimorphodon.  

Unlike the films, this remembers that Pterosaurs use their heads for grasping prey and have no eagle talons. 

Pteranodon is more gregarious, an albatross scaled up.

Quetzalcoatlus is just... well, your basic Giant Azdarhkid pterosaur. It will totally spear a person and eat them. But it spends a lot of the time on the ground, so it keeps the enclosure size small ... for a Giraffe sized animal.  And yes, it will eat people if it can.  

Sordes is an eater of insects and amphibians.  When disturbed, they will swarm around an attacker, pecking and biting to drive them off. This can lead to some unfortunate accidents. 

Anurognathus is basically a pterosaur owl and insect eater.  They have the same unnerving effect as owls.  Their defensive cries and glowing red eyes are terror inducing among humans, easily generating panic. 

Dimorphodon gallops along the ground most of the time, flying only for short distances.  Insects and small animals make up the bulk of their diet.  If it’s small and fast-moving, they will try and take a bite.  That includes fingers.  Or whole hands.  

The Park

Now we come to the dinosaurs.  There are 3 main groups of them in the park: Minifauna, Fauna, and Megafauna. The Difference comes down to weight.  Megafauna is reserved for animals over a ton.  Fauna is for animals above 20kg (or 50lbs). Minifauna is for animals below 20kg on average. 

The park comes with 21 examples of Megafauna, 10 examples of Fauna, and 10 examples of Minifauna.

In the Megafauna, many of them are prone to being ... chaotic. 

Apatosaurs are the second biggest animal in the park by weight (15 tonnes).  Their necks are lined with spines they use for defense and in contests with each other.  They also have a line of raised spines along their backs, which become quite wicked at the tip of their tail.  Lashes with their tail, done to other herd members in dominance points, or against what annoys them, can be very dangerous.  But not as dangerous as when they rear up and try to smash things with their feet or neck. It’s also a low feeder/grazer, vacuuming up food as it moves its head side to side.  

Camarasaurus (C. lentus) are the heaviest animals in the park (20 tonnes), and are mid-range browsers.  They are docile, but their large nasal cavity proves very enticing to Avian Flu, which it acts as a carrier for, but doesn’t really suffer from. 

Spinosaurus is a big land pelican/Waddling Penguin/Crocodile thing. Big claws and jaws are nasty enough on their own with its semi-aquatic nature making it versatile, it still is goofier than it has any right to be.  Which masks its danger. 

Saltosaurus is a sauropod hippo with armored scutes along its back.  That’s pretty darn weird enough.  It’s as heavy as an elephant, and a browser as well, but not to the height of some other animals...

Tyrannosaurus hunts in packs like wolves, so they had to make a group of them as “Sisters” to prevent self-destructive behavior.  So there are 4 “Sisters” that the park knows of.   With all we know about T. rex, there’s not much more to ‘enhance’ it other than letting it be as smart as a modern alligator, or house cat.  Yes, they are comparable.  Eagle-Eyed, nose better than a bloodhound, and with powerful jaws, it is an apex predator for a reason. 

Triceratops has small quills along its torso and back like a porcupine to defend itself in addition to armor plaiting.   They prefer to travel in small groups and fights for dominance can occur if the group gets larger than 5 or 10 individuals.

Deinocheirus is r one of those dinosaurs “This is too weird for the 80s to handle” we now know of.  When riled, its arms are very dangerous weapons. And it will bite, even if only to toss away smaller attackers. Eating fish and plants, this animal has an impressive bluff display, and confidence to back it up. 

Theirizinosaurus is very weird, and worse, has the personality of a goose or swan.  Very confident, will rush down what it thinks are threats, and those claws make it very dangerous. 

Omeisaurus uses its clubbed tail to establish a pecking order (or “smashing order”) in the herd. 

Euhelopus is one of the few true browsing sauropods, really resembling a Giraffe in posture or a small Brachiosaurus/Giraffatita.   Like a Giraffe, it can kick with a LOT of force.  Enough to decapitate a man from brute force alone.  It’s the smallest of the long-neck Brachiosaurus, which is why it was targeted for cloning.  

Ankylosaurus is a goat.  It eats damn near anything.  Primarily eating leaves, it also adores fruit, and will go after large insects when it can.  Or swarms of them it just licks up after breaking open a nest.  They are proficient diggers as well, they like to sleep in burrows they build. It’s also very well camouflaged, so you can trip over it and it will likely take a swipe at you for your mistake. 

Edmontosaurus may be considered a ‘simple’ dinosaur from the bones, but that doesn’t tell the whole story, not by a longshot. See that picture? That’s an Edmontosaur! 

Stegosaurus is an extremely stupid ninja.  It moves quietly for its size, can wiggle and turn its plates red when angry as a distraction, and fold its whole body into a U shape to better strike enemies with its thagomizer.  And it is not afraid of groin shots. 

Styracosaurus is all about intimidation.  When confronted, it will mock charge, holler, stamp, and make a fuss. But if you stand up to it, it will back off, or even run away. 

Amargasaurus uses its neck spines defensively while grazing.  When threatened, they roll their heads under their chests, sticking out their spikes, and charge.  They do this with minimal provocation. They also lash their tails around wickedly.  

Parasaurolophus is LOUD.  Constant maintenance is needed on the paddock as they can rattle apart their paddock locks if they are not checked regularly.  It also gets the attention of certain predators regularly.  Insulation has so far proved ineffective.

Gigantoraptor is pretty damn weird all on its own. An omnivorous oviraptorosaur over 12ft tall at the hip, feathered and fearsome.  It uses its feathery arms (as well as a displaying throat pouch to communicate with members of its species. 

Allosaurus, the lion of the Jurassic.  They behave similarly to crocodiles, but more actively.  Which means they hunt semi-cooperatively.  Because of their primarily slashing jaw setup and strong necks, they prefer to bleed large items to death rather than quickly kill them.  They can still swallow a man whole (as long as they aren’t too big).  

Plateosaurus is a large, primitive planteater.  It walks on its hind legs, despite its size and descendants.  When threatened, it rears up and tries to claw attackers who get to close like an irate Ant Eater.  And those claws are very mean. They rake trees with their claws as a demonstration of power in the herd. 

Borealpelta digs ruts for themselves to sleep in at night.  This means only their armor bits show up.  They usually use the same one when they can, but it still damages enclosures.

Carnotaurus is a Cheetahs.  Extremely long-legged runners at high speed, and at long distance.  They can also swallow a man whole by stretching their jaws out. Also, its tiny arms are used for flappy dance displays. 

Now we come to the Fauna, which are small enough to get inside buildings and still be a visible threat to humans on occasion. 

Ceratosaurus is basically a bipedal crocodile, scutes and all.  The nasal horn is flat and largely for display.  They prefer swampy environments and eating aquatic animals. The thick hides of these animals make darting almost impossible, and mildly resistant to small arms fire. 

Pachycephalosaurus have dynamic skulls, the younger ones being spikier than the adults.  And they will butt EVERYTHING that annoys them even slightly.  Worse still, they are omnivores. They decrease the amount of meat in their diet as they age, but they won’t turn it down. 

Dilophosaurus has the frill and venom of the novel/movies, but the frill is made of feathers rather than skin and is lost in adults, which can be up to 3m/10ft tall.  

“Velociraptor”, or really, Dakotaraptor, is as smart as a crow, which means minor tool use.  Juveniles can fly short distances to escape an attack.  They are less like wolves and more like lions in how they hunt, climbing in trees to assist in their ambushes.  Think of them as ground-eagle-panthers with crow intelligence. 

Protoceratops make burrows to live in.  They sleep for short periods throughout the day and night, at seemingly random intervals.  

Struthiomimus’ fully developed wings are colorful, large, and help it maneuver at speeds up to 50mph (80kph).  They also help it intimidate others -- their claws also packing a bit of a punch. Primarily herbivorous, they are also very vocal animals.  Almost obnoxiously so.  

Dryosaurus is the dinosaur equivalent of a deer or large gazelle, living in small groups in forested areas.  Because of this, and an extremely skittish nature, they are hard to spot in their enclosures.  Sure, they are ON the tour, but the runaway when the cars come by.  It makes care for them difficult as well. 

“Troodon” is really Stenonychosaurus. Omnivorous, the focus on rodents and other small animals. They also feed on more fruit, seeds, nuts, and other high energy plants more regularly than InGen thought.  They are the best cage breakers in the park, being the smartest animals there (yes, smarter than the raptors).  They are also guide-animals.  They will guide larger predators, like tyrannosaurs to food sources they can’t access, but that the other animal can.  Similar to Crows and Wolves.  

“Oviraptor”, really Anzu,  is a large oviraptorid.  Herbivorous with occasional meanderings into carnivory, it’s main gimmick is its voice.  It’s a Lyrebird. It can vocally mimic anything its herd before and incorporate it into display songs. It can also use this to manipulate other dinosaurs, be it attract small animals to eat, bring ‘help’ for itself, or scare away potential threats.  So, imagine a scene.  A group of humans is hunting for other survivors, they hear someone crying “Help! Help!” and occasionally screaming.  They rush to aid and find this tall animal here.  Their guard lowered in confusion as another predator sneaks up behind them and takes them down. 

“Parkosaurus” is actually Oryctodromeus.  A burrower like Protoceratops, they are more communal in their nesting.  It’s rather unsettling to see animals as big as a medium-sized dog pop-up out of the ground like prairie dogs. 

Microfaunae are Coyote or smaller animals that can still be dangerous, but not so often or as directly.  

Coelophysis is the “Emu” of the park. They are inquisitive, but also not very bright.  They are also opportunistic.  Which can be hilarious, but also dangerous, because you are made of meat.  And they see no qualms with biting someone and running away again and again.  In groups. 

Psittacosaurus rattles its tail feathers as a means of simple communication.  They also bite with a lot of force when agitated, enough to take off a hand. 

Dromaeosaurus is a small raptor (or rather, typical, medium-sized one), but one more heavily built to take down prey larger than itself.  This one will hook onto a person and bite away, ripping out chunks.  Given they are about the size of a turkey, several of them can do that to a person.  

Vespersaurus is an opportunistic omnivorous desert dweller that runs along sand primarily, using its single grounded toe to get better traction and movement. Its kick has TWO large raptor-like claws on it, making it extra nasty. 

Limusaurus is another Noasaurid, a strange group of dinosaurs related to Ceratosaurus.  This one changes its diet as it ages.  As hatchlings and juveniles are omnivorous, eating plants, insects, and small animals.  As they become adults, they switch to an entirely herbivorous lifestyle.  This confused the hell out of InGen first time through. 

Nanosaurus (a.k.a. Othnelia/Othneliasaurus) is a tiny ornithopod that fills in the same role as a Thompson’s Gazelle.  Small, grazing, and skittish.  They like being in large herds for protection.  

Panphagia is an omnivorous ancient sauropod relative and the oldest species of dinosaur in Jurassic Park.  A consummate opportunist, its hands make it a pretty decent cage breaker.   And it really will eat anything, almost as much as the Ankylosaurs or goats, but more carnivorous.  

Procompsognathus is a chicken-sized carnivore that eats small animals as well as scavenges for food. It is also venomous, operating in groups to take down injured animals larger than itself.  

Compsognathus, by contrast, is a housecat in terms of personality.  An expert killer of small things, but can easily cozy up to humans.  Considered “Petting Zoo” material, if not for their teeth and claws.  

Shuvuuia is one of those animals that scientists even today don’t really know how it works and is also one of the smallest nonavian dinosaurs.  It uses its claws to break open rotting wood and picks off insects very quickly. Because it eats a lot of poisonous insects and acid-filled ants.  And it converts that into pure stink. Yeah, it’s an anteater-skunk dinosaur.   Final Thoughts I could probably have shaved things down to 10-15 of the movies/books, but I wanted to fill things out not just for variety, but for a proper park.   I’ll probably revisit this for a later post...